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Ruby: I dare Emma to prank call her mom.
Emma taking her phone out: Pftt thats it? Siri call mom.
Siri: *Calling 'Mommy'*
Emma: no no no no
*Regina's phone rings*
Ruby:
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Regina to Sidney: Emma Swan is going to be a problem. I can't stand her, she's going to take my son away from me.
Meanwhile Emma: *writing and kicking her feet in the air* Dear Diary, Regina smiled at me today.
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Emma: yeah ive been really into true crime podcast's recently
regina(trying to flirt): oh wow thats crazy ive actually been a main suspect in seven different murder cases
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Emma, texting: Real quick, what’s our antique sword budget?
Regina: Don’t.
Emma: Is that more or less than $678.99?
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*Emma sneezes*
Regina: Emma, are you sick? Here, take this blanket, and I'm bringing homemade soup and you really should take better care of yo-
*Snow sneezes*
Regina: Oh my god. Shut the hell up.
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Henry: What are the hardest things to say?
Snow: I was wrong.
Regina: I need help.
Emma: Worcestershire sauce.
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Emma: What’s it like dating me?
Regina: You ever had a migraine and been turned on at the same time?
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Death: The time has come for me to drag your soul down to the depths where it'll-
Killian: Yeah cool just let me ask my wife real quick.
Death: What? No! T-that's not how this w-
Killian: She said no and that she'll meet you behind Granny's at 6.
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This is basically canon
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emma: when i was 15, i went to camp and a kid shoved a pen up his ass to impress a girl
emma: it got stuck and he had to go to the hospital to have it removed
regina: was the girl impressed though?
zelena: i would be
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Emma: You have to apologize to them Regina .
Regina : Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the person you fell in love with!
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Regina: Our relationship is strictly professional.
Emma sitting on Regina's lap: Absolutely, only business.
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Regina: Okay. Never have I ever had lesbian fantasies about the two of us being together.
Emma: Shit. *Drinks*
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Emma: Whenever Regina gets mad at me, I tighten all the lids on the jars so she has to ask me for help
[sounds of glass shattering in the background]
Emma: It hasn't worked yet but it will.
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Emma: If you ever feel embarrassed remember that in middle school I tried to convince myself that I wasn’t gay by making a compromise to myself to only be gay at night.
Regina: The Gay Knight Rises.
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