#it sucks to have to come to terms with the fact

[babyitsgayoutside]

I went viral on instagram for being a Pro-shipper

Before I even knew what a pro-shipper was.

Around this time last year I had just gotten back to the states from being in Japan for 3-ish months. I posted a reel jokingly showing off some of the BL Manga that I had bought during my stay.

In the video I showed Volume one of Yarachin Slut club and volume one of Hitorijime, my hero.

If you don’t know these series. Yarachin is about a group of boys who run a high school sex club it also has various degrees of dubcon and gang rape. The other deposits an age gap relationship teacher/student.

The reel where I showed these manga went viral on the wrong side of the internet and In 2 months my instagram received over 80,000,000 views across all my reels and I’m averaging at this current moment 10-20,000,000 views a month.

the comments I was receiving and have been receiving since are beyond words.

Some examples of what the more tame comments

And if you think the comments are bad (not shown are the hundreds of comments telling me I’m not trans or gay, that I’m a cis woman pretending to be queer to garner support from the queer community, misgendering and deadnaming me, threading to dox me/send my address/personal info to people via DMs. Not to mention the newest group of people who found out I have a dead sibling and are using that as a way to attack me now as well. My DMs are also terrible.

These people are mad about two volumes of manga. Manga I bought in a brick and mortar store in Japan. Manga that have official anime adaptations.

They are calling a manga you can currently buy at Barnes and Nobel child p*rn and calling me a p*dip hole becuase i own it.

I don’t know what the point of this post is really, I’ve come back to tumblr and realize the entire internet does not in fact hate me, and people on here actually can logically think about things like this not in black and white.

Am I a pro shipper?

I’ve heard if the term, I’ve seen it around and always thought It was for extreme niche interests in fanfic, fictional media and general fictional content that I don’t particularly find myself reading or interacting with ever.

But then I looked into it after being called it 1000000 times a day on my social media and I relaxed it’s not about normalizing incestfics or spreading niche fan art around tags like antis would have you believe. At the end of the day it’s a group of people online with a very punk aligned mentality that censorship is wrong. Fiction is a place for self expression and understand that fiction is fiction. It’s not about individual tags on a03 or black butler ships. It’s about the freedom to express yourself thought fucking fiction. Weather it be to cope with trauma, or to just get some fucking weird feelings you are having out on paper through fanfciton, through projecting into a character from media you like.

I’m not big with labels, so I’m not a “proshipper” but I’m on their side, because it’s the right side.

You can argue all you want it’s not, that they are “horrible people” for the fictional media they consume. But the opposite side is literally telling me to “slit vertically” on a daily basis. You are no better than the people you hate.

Anywho, yeah. Going viral sucks.

#proshipper safe #proshippers please interact #proship #anti censorship #anti anti #antis dni #shipping discourse #boy love #age gap ship

[neet-elite]

↳ EVENT 04. Whitney & Sebastian (Jealousy Sex)

Pairing: Sebastian / F!Reader / M!Whitney Genre: Smut 18+ WC: 2,380 Warnings: crossover, meta, name calling, degradation, threesome, double penetration, creampie Prompt(s): 06 — jealousy sex Wanna take part in the event?: CLICK HERE!!

A/N: my first crossover post ever? tbh, a few of you have asked for crossovers! so im looking forward to trying to execute them well enough LOL... i've never done this before, so please be gentle... but thank you for the interesting challenge!! i enjoyed exploring this topic a lot MWAH!!

Laying in bed with you plus a stranger on your other side was never something he'd ever dreamed of, let alone allow to happen. But, tonight is a special case if there ever was one, a necessity, really. Possessively pinching at your cheek to bring your attention back to solely him for a second, a vain attempt to assert dominance over your free time. His nose wrinkles in judgement at the man behind you, dissatisfied with the turn of events of tonight as you writhe between two men, a burning in his heart urging him to speak before the other steals the spotlight; and perhaps even you, given how there's a whole other side to you he's yet to be privy to.

Which only really makes his words harsher, tongue spitting venom aimed mostly for the other man at your backside, sickeningly insidious in his intent given the faux sweet tone he adopts.

And yet needs must.

"Tell me, babe—" He cuts himself off with a moan, the feeling of your cunt walls wrapping around him even tighter as soon as he speaks leaves him a little breathless. Dirty words caught in his throat when your gaze meets his for just a second; enough for him to recognise how fucked silly you already are between two men, before your eyes roll prettily to the back of your head. Bit off more than you can chew, pretty? "Have you— fuck— have you made a decision yet?" He doesn't mean to sound so impatience, biting down on his tongue else he'll spill even more filth your way.

It's just that he's never felt you this tight before, though that might be due to the fact that you've got two cocks inside of you right now. The feeling of Whitney's rubbing against his own every time they pass each other in tandem strokes feels so fucking good; maybe only made better from the ego fuelled jealousy resting thick in his stomach for you. He's not stupid, and he knows you probably don't have the mental capacity to respond to him right now, but instinct begs him to at least try and steal you away. The weight of two fat cocks inside of your tiny little cunt must be difficult to deal with, right baby? Copious amounts of precum drooling from your abused little hole, squished cruelly between two hard bodies and used in such a selfish competition of pride.

"Isn't it fuckin' obvious." Whitney grunts behind you, prompting Sebastian to roll his eyes in annoyance. Or was it in pleasure of your cunt sucking his cock off so well at the sound of another mans voice? He'll never truly know, tongue poking out to wet his lips before they hang open in a soft gasp when you're rocked forward and more into his arms with how hard Whitney snaps his hips into you. The lack of care for your pretty self coming from the man behind you irks him, especially when you do very little to fight back against the rude touch tugging at your ass, pulling at your waist to hump the cock behind you. In fact, it looks like you like it, grabbing and scratching at Sebastian's front for some semblance of reality. Silly girl, you'll find no such thing here.

And in any case, what right does this guy have over you, really? Who is he to tell him what you, his long term girlfriend, prefers. At the very least, he understands that you'll be gone from his existence for various lengths of time, unable to see him due to 'real life', or whatever. But he'd never imagined you'd be visiting other men when he was waiting so patiently for you to return back to the valley. Isn't he enough for you? Didn't you say that Stardew Valley was your favourite place to be?

Upset not at the clear cut infidelity, but more so at the fact that you thought you could escape him simply by jumping from game to game. No, no; it's expected that you'd find others. Different men to cuddle up to, stranger guys who no doubt make you feel differently to how he does— but there's gotta be a similar thread running throughout your choices, right? Something consistent between himself and the brute behind you stuffing you so full of cock that even he himself feels like he's choking with every thrust. Holding on tight to your arm as you lay on your side before him, his other arm hooked under your neck to keep you safe and secure as you're mad to rock between two tips.

Him, comparable to Whitney? Now that's insulting.

Why you'd ever choose to date someone as characterised by their bullying as Whitney is is beyond him. The pretty pout you wear when Whitney grabs at your throat only stokes the fire in his tummy too, a thick layer of bile resting on top at the way he gets glared at by the other man with possession written all over his expression. And Sebastian only knows it as such because he worn the same look with you time and time again, determined to prove his worth to you now more than ever to hopefully keep you around for longer than whoever else you might be seeing. To bring you back to your favourite game again.

Deciding to ignore the honestly annoying man challenging his position by your side, Sebastian instead tries to appeal to your morals. Deceptively digging into your yearning for comfort that he knows you need more than anything else. It's why you're with him in the first place, right?

"I missed you so much." He nuzzles into you; or as much as he can given how violently you're bouncing between them, how fast he has to pick up his pace to match Whitney's unfair rhythm. It's making him a little dizzy, to be honest. Desire pooling in his tummy for you and the broken sobs his cock fucks out of you. The pathetic whines, almost babbles of something resembling begs that Whitney thrusts out of you. Pretty little overwhelmed baby, isn't this what you wanted when you had suggested a little test? Given his earlier argument with Whitney over who you preferred, wasn't it you who suggested some friendly competition? And now look at you, all sobs and shivers, a coo automatically rolling off his tongue when he nestles closer to you, his lips ghosting over your own in a yearning to claim you as his. "I'm here, 'm not going anywhere, baby." He promises you, disarmingly imploring you to reach out for him, his hands firm on your soft body for stability while he fucks his whole length in and out of your overstuffed cunt. Bet it's so sore, isn't it? Need a little help distracting yourself from every balls deep thrust he offers you, don't you? The sound of wet skin on skin causing his cock to tremble against Whitney's fat length inside of you, your lewd moans filling his ears with every hump of his tip against your most sensitive parts inside.

Inching closer, he plants his lips on yours. A sloppy mix of saliva, promising you that he'll come out victorious by the time he's done with you, imagining the sight of you limping into his arms instead of Whitney's so he can whisk you away back to the valley where you belong— except in doing so, he inevitable ends up stuttering his hips inside of you to the thought of punishing you for even insinuating that he might be a second place choice in your life. But is it even punishment if you'd be enjoying yourself, much like how you are now? Gasping into his open mouth, spilling moan after moan thanks to Whitney's pounding from behind. Fuck, he can even feel the way your body positively vibrates from enjoyment against him, rendered useless and unable to effectively kiss him back, tongue lolling out of your wanting mouth for him to suck on a lil. Just a little, because if he were to do anything more than that, then he's more than likely about to cream your cunt full, thinking it's just so fucking cute that you've been fucked truly stupid on two cocks.

"Pair of sluts—" Whitney laughs from behind, but Sebastian doesn't miss the undeniable crack in his counterparts voice. The hint of shakiness present only because you're so fucking tight and feel so fucking good that there's no room to do anything other than melt into you. Like some sort of horny amalgamation, sweat and sticky and heat, drool and other bodily fluids shared all in the name of rivalry. To try and win your utmost attention and affections, and to successfully pull you back into your preferred setting, favoured game, and most important love interest.

He knows what's at stake, and as such, removes himself from your lips to instead suckle on your neck— where Whitney might prefer bite marks and bruises, he's intent on leaving behind gentle love bites as his mark on you. His fingers slipping from your body from sweat, humping his trembling cock into you in short snap thrusts; just how he knows you like. And God he has no choice but to muffle a moan against your skin when Whitney favours longer strokes inside. Fast but deep, the feeling of rubbing his needy cock just as much against your plush insides as he is against Whitney's girth feels too good, immediately prompting him to dip his hand down intending on rubbing at your clit in sheer desperation not to be the first to cum, only to find Whitney already doing so— fuck he feels too good to argue back. Simply falling further into your soft body, cradling you from harms way despite how your body warms at the degradation, his chest tight at the way you mumble and moan. It's all a bit too much for him, sucking your neck for dear life, a silent plea to be crowned victorious with eager fucks into your overstuffed hole.

Maybe you prefer to be demeaned, right? Bullied into submission, his nails digging into any part of your pretty exposed body he can reach, fumbling around in a tangled heap of limbs as Whitney attempts to grab your attention too— though the latter seems to hold his composure better when it comes to your angel cunt. "Such a good slut, aren't you? C'mon, tell me how y'really feel."

But the slur in Whitney's words is enough to let Sebastian know that he isn't the only one close, not so much fucking you now as he is just trying to hold back for you. Muscles taut and jaw tight, gritting into the sticky feeling of your cunt, slick coating his length just as much as precum does, how the mixture drips down to his balls to stain the sheets below. To cum first would be sooo embarrassing, wouldn't it? Especially when he's doing his utmost to prove himself to you, to try and coax you back to the valley, and not whatever universe Whitney is from. It's where you belong, at the end of his leaking tip every night for him to bully into you over and over again, even if right now he can do no such thing— unlatching from your neck just to spill sweet praises for you, and to hopefully disallow you from answering Whitney's burning question. Deep down he knows you're gonna say his name anyway, or at least hopes is the case, the way your glassy eyes haze over his almost pained features, drool dripping from your tongue every time he presses his cock inside. You wear the fucked out expression so well, pretty baby getting fucked by two big cocks, is it more than you can handle?

It's okay, because from the way your body shakes under his fingertips, the tell tale tremble inside your pretty little angel cunt, how your voice almost goes missing in your silent gasps for more— he knows that you're close too. And, frustratingly, Whitney can gather about just as much also— how long have you been seeing him? "Already?" Whitney sneers, unsure of who it's more aimed at, but Sebastian hasn't the strength to fight back. Not for himself, and certainly not for you. Too lost in the way your cunt practically begs him for more, his hips instinctively fucking into you as if it were his only purpose in life. Messy and clumsy humps fill you up, almost as if he were getting fucked by Whitney alongside you, but fuck he can't help it. The weight of your body pressed tight against his own as Whitney takes a more dominating stance, effectively fastening Sebastian under you as you get mounted from behind is intoxicating, your puffy clit surely rubbing nicely against his groin from the new position and—

Well, he's got no hope of holding back when he feels your full little hole spasm around him. Orgasm washing over you as you fall into his chest, moaning directly down his ear as you wrap your arms around his neck and hold on for dear life. Sebastian too holds onto you, arms wrapped around the small of your back, pressing you down onto his cock for him to offer you merger little fucks up and into your heat. And fuck it feels so good, fat load shooting against your deepest parts, turning his cock all sticky as it gushes around inside, against Whitney's cock, and gets pushed out of your cute cunt with every extra thrust. He barely gets a chance to calm down providing Whitney's uncharacteristically kind slower pace, letting you ride out your high just enough before the brutality begins again.

"Well, what d'ya think, slut? Got a favourite yet?" Whitney seethes, clearly holding on to the last remainder of stability he's got as you wail out in hyper sensitivity.

Maybe if Sebastian holds you close to him and whispers sweet nothings down your ear to help settle you back into the unfair fucking you'll favour him. It's the least he could do, seeing as he finished first anyway. Anything to get you back to the valley, and spending time in his world again.

#500 event! #dol #stardew valley smut #sdv smut #dol smut #dol fanfic #sdv sebastian smut #sdv sebastian fanfic #whitney the bully smut #whitney the bully #i forgot other tags oopsie

[the-jesus-pill]

You’ve got to forgive yourself for being traumatized and needing to learn how to function again. 

Recovery isn’t always nightmares and depression, it’s forgetting to eat, being scared of what others might see as completely normal things, it’s getting random panic attacks, not knowing how to take care of yourself, not knowing how to live like an adult, even if you’re twenty, thirty, forty, fifty, of feeling like you’re failing to function in a world where everyone seems to have their shit together. 

If you need help, ask for it. Go to forums and ask for advice. Take advantage of community resources. Buy pre-sliced veggies and fruits, eat instant meals if you can’t cook for yourself today. Hire someone. Ask a neighbor for a favor. Buy any item you think might make life easier, even if you feel like you aren’t ‘disabled’ enough to have it. 

Some of the depression posts (ie open your windows, take a shower, go outside, call a friend) are really helpful but they’re not always enough. I’ve found advice for spoonies, people with chronic pain or other disabilities have the best tips because they know what it’s like to be bedridden, out of energy, stuck in a brain fog. 

You may never return back to the energy you had when you were younger and you might always need to use crutches to help you through life. It’s the same with medication. 

Trauma is a real thing that happens to you, it physically alters your brain and it’s alright to have lasting scars. 

You’re not broken, your life is not over and you can still be happy. 

It’s not your fault.

#felix speaks #trauma #recovery #deconversion #ex cult #ex religious #ptsd #cptsd #healing #disabled #actually traumatized #spoonies #things i need to remind myself with too #it sucks to have to come to terms with the fact #but youll be so much better off once you stop denying yourself the help you need #also re: buying items meant for the disabled #do it! #you are not taking resources away #if you need it you need it #and the more in demand these items are the better theyll be made in the future

[rox-of-iu]

no thought only MQF in brain* (*even more than usual yeah.....)

ok lads listen up. i love allllll Mu Qingfang designs ok? all the interpretations are cool and valid and dear ok BUT. whenever I personally try to draw MQF without a 'stache he just looks to me like a first-year med student ok hjdfhkfd

but anyway. when i was scrolling around and being completely normal about MQF i saw a lot of ppl say stuff like 'this is my 'mqf is actually pretty' agenda' and its alwaysss about peeled mqf SO I HAVE A POINT TO PROVE OK. mqf with a moustache can be also a prettyboy ok?? i can prove it 😭😭

so here are my qingfangs where i turned up the babygirl vibes to absolute max as i could hsdfjkhdskfh 💜

#mu qingfang #svsss #listen.......actually nevermind hfdjkhfk #im having. thoughts #hsjkdhkf #maybe ill also make a text post some time later because i cannot shut up im having lack of fics issues hjdfhfk #so anyway 🥰 hjkfh silly litol weary doctor amirite- #also some may have noticed that i have finally used the correct peak seniority for MQF aha well #(through gritted teeth) i have finally come to terms with the fact he is 8th its fine its whatever i like 8 anyway #it fits anyway of course the doctor peak is underappreciated smh smh smh smh #also btw if youve ever been influenced by my mqf design i have to let you know each and every time that happens i gain 5 billion years hjfd #<333333333 #it makes me soooooooo giddy that ppl like him enough that i change their perception of him lmao jdfhkd #nothing gives me more power points than when the moustache propaganda claims another victim FR HAGHJKFD #so yeah 🥰🥰 #wait also gotta mention that im not like bashing any other designs i want to make that super clear #i suck at tones i dont want this to get misinterpreted #all mqf good mqf 💕💕

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#i was looking through old photos today. they where from wjen i was like 1 and it made me so sad #bc my mum would have been like only a year or 2 older then i am now and she looked so young #and now she has an abdomen full of tumors and blistered hands and feet. theyre prob gonna hsve to remove her bladder #but shes still very pragmatic abt it. but she grew up in a house where no one really cared about her feelings so she made them small #and now her mother calls and doesn't ask how her grandkids are doing and doesn't ask how her daughter is doing. im cursed with terrible #grandparents on both sides but i resent my mothers mother worse. though my dad said i probably wouldnt have survived his upbringing #and hes right. my nana has like zero empathy and cant cook for shit. idk how my parents r so normal but the fact i had a good upbringing is #probably the only reason im still here. and thats the other thing that made me sad abt the old pics. just looking at this little baby with a #fucked up head and thinking: in 25 years that kid is gonna b so broken down their not gonns kno what to do or how to fix it. idk whats wrong #with me. ive always been some stage of miserable but i used to b able to get things done. and now i cant seem to force functionality #and it sucks. bc im home now and i still feel like im cringing around this open wound in my chest. but whatever #as of today ive started taking ab1lify. hopefully it helps in the long term but in the short term it triggers my 0cd. which is not fun #its so frustrating. whatever. i also found out my eyes used to not work together. not enough to have a lazy eye but it was hard for me to #read and apparently my eyes were tracking at like double the speed of a normal person. wtf is wrong with my brain? also also my mum was like #yea i never would have guessed bip0lar but we thought it was something. autism i could see 100% but yea didnt see that coming. ao i guess #i brehave like a bit of an oddball. ans my nana would bother my dad to try to make me participate in church and my dad was like no. she #clearly don't wanna b here lol. ay. they did the best they could which i appreciate #unrelated

[toxicshipsincorporated]

I feel like people are equating neonazis trying to co-opt a movement that was started by a group of people who have been driven from their homeland by the acts of a violent colonial state as a way to 1) delegitamize the movement because it benefits and validates white supremacy and white supremacist ideology that says all non-whites are at their core evil violent animals but also 2) appeal to the anti-semetism that is baked into a lot of Western peoples' core beliefs and reality is the same as white supermacist groups endorsing someone like Donald Trump.

You might say, oh well that is the same! And I would say, you have no spine and have zero desire to actually fight for a better future and are instead interested only in crown yourself and your own group as the most moral and best team on the playing field.

We should 100% take steps to protect young folks (and frankly old folks) entering into the activist scene from falling into white supremacy and anti-semetism. A lot of people (in particular Western and white ppl) need to be vigilant as they join the cause for Palestinian liberation and freedom to keep in check the anti-semetism AND islamophobia that has been taught to them practically since birth.

But for me, to say that neonazis and white supremacists would seek to scout in pro-palestinian movements BECAUSE being pro-palestinian makes you anti-semetic is islamophobic and I'll even go so far as to say anti-black because of the strong connection that Black American civil rights activists have to Islam and to Palestine.

#had to go and block someone that i liked on this hellsite because of this bullshit #and that fuckin sucks #i am always willing to look internally and question to what extent my learned antisemetism is extending #and since becoming more aware of what is happening in Palestine #i have had to come to terms with how normalized and deep anti-semetism is rooted in my mind #but I will not be told that I am anti-semetic because I know what violent settler colonialism is #i know what settler colonialism is and the fact that people ignore it #is clear the way that colonialism is so heavily normalized as well in the Western mind

[nat1nonsense]

“Matilda” from Harry Styles’ new album is a Beauregard Lionett song, actually

Y’know?

#like. her bio family sucked and they never really cared for her like she deserved but the nein do care for her and will always show her love #show her love in their own special and maybe not typical ways of course #this song feels like beau coming to terms with the fact that her bio family doesn’t have to be her home. the nein can be her home #anyways. having feelings about Beau tonight. I love her so much and her story means the world to me <3 #critical role #the mighty nein #beauregard lionett #mighty nein

[chadsuke]

Books Read in 2023:

Inconspicuous Consumption: The Environmental Impact You Don't Know You Have by Tatiana Schlossberg (2019)

Fully Automated Luxury Communism: A Manifesto by Aaron Bastani (2018)

You Suck, Sir by Paul Bae (2014)

Utopia For Realists: How We Can Build the Ideal World by Rutger Bregman (2014)

Revolutionary Petunias by Alice Walker (1973)

Girl with the Pearl Earring by Tracy Chevalier (1999)

Twelve by Twelve: A One-Room Cabin Off the Grid & Beyond the American Dream by William Powers (2010)

Windfall: The Booming Business of Global Farming by McKenzie Funk (2014)

The Environmentalist's Dilemma: Promise and Peril in an Age of Climate Crisis by Arno Kopecky (2021)

[ID: Covers of aforementioned books. End ID.]

#SUPER loved inconspicuous consumption it was just v informative all around #i have it physical and will b keeping it #fully automated was an interesting thought experience ig? it was a book. #you suck sir was a v quick and lighthearted read of a teacher sharing his stories #utopia was very much like arguing for social democracy and so in terms of that it was v solid #tbh i would rec this book as a good one for like. liberals in ur life #not a difficult read and tbh im gonna get my mom 2 read it #petunias very very good book of poetry #pearl earring is a fictional story of how that painting came to be #i enjoyed it! the prose was very well written! #twelve by twelve was SO bad i literally couldn't finish it and the author is racist and just. dont touch it #windfall was difficult to get through sometimes but VERY worth it i found it informative and also just. #make me so fucking aghast #environmentalist dilemma was....... a book. it started out very strong and i was absolutely hooked and thought i'd love it but then it wen #t downhill. i found it quite informative and interesting in parts for sure #but the author is more centrist than i am and that comes across QUITE a bit and theres a lot about like. his own opinions and stuff #the straight up reporting the facts parts were interesting but not his own opinion i just wanted him 2 be quiet #2023media #gigi.txt

[amphibifish]

christine cqnigula is so mecore

#fish.txt #i just woke up like ten minutes ago and i am thinking about her and also rod avenue q because. i love them #sorry i'm thinking about i love play rehearsal again i just love that song so much #i love play rehearsal is like what fantasies come true is to me #they kind of have the same concept too they pull the ol' bait n switch (i don't think i'm using that term right) on ya at the end #no sorry that's not the right song the song i'm thinking of is uhhhhh #guy that id kinda be into #I LIKE BOTH ANYWYAS #christine's solos r mostly my faves from bmc so #it sucks to be me and guy that id kinda be into were the first songs i listened to from each musical fun fact #i heard them actually around the same time ! i think i heard it sucks to be me first though

[the-lord-of-the-things]

having to remember to be kind about myself about productivity is a lot easier said than done

#been coming to terms with the fact that adhd is a disability that is going to impact my ability to function #BUT ALSO #tmi for menstrual shit #I had the worst period I can remember ever having this month #crippling pmdd that took me out of commission for two weeks #and then I had my entire normal 3 days all wrapped into one #I lost so much blood I was light headed for 24 hours #and I'm still feeling exhausted and like I got run over by a steam roller days later #all ontop of smoke allergies because I live in god's tinderbox and there's a big ol fire a couple counties north of us #and it sucks cause I wanted to do something for yeehawgust but I Still don't have the energy to draw #I barely had enough energy for the new ffxiv patch and even then I haven't been able to summon the spoons for island #I've just been glam grinding because its the only thing I have the capactiy to manage

[blackcatanna]

Having a uterus is fun because your friend will be like, "How are you? :) " and if you want to be honest, you'll have to say something like,

"Well, I've been irrationally, uncontrollably angry and upset for a few days but hopefully the anger will abate now that SO MUCH BLOOD (which I need IN MY BODY for my immune system to fight off all these plagues going round) is flooding out of my vagina.

Most likely, I shall wake up tomorrow covered in my own blood and ruin yet more sheets and pyjamas because the overpriced products I use to prevent that are more concerned with making me feel "dainty" and "ladylike" and "#girlboss" than doing their damn job.

Still, I must be grateful that my periods are slightly less agonising than they once were, since I passed that huge, concerning lump of uterine tissue through my cervix a few months ago. Now they're almost manageable (provided I take lots of drugs and don't leave the house)! #blessed :) "

#periods #menstruation #this is why I gobble birth control pills like tic-tacs #also periods make me want to scream and cry and claw things because it feels like I'm losing control of my body #I (really REALLY) don't want kids and I resent having to go through this shit so I can become a vessel for them #Took me years to (more or less) come to terms with the fact that this is just something my body does #and it doesn't mean anything about my identity #like whoever tells little kids that it means they're a woman now or it happens so they can become a mother STOP THAT SHIT #I much prefer bonding over how much it SUCKS #tw periods #periods don't make anyone more or less of a woman #that goes for people of all gender identities of course #trans women are women and trans men are men #in case anyone's confused about where I stand on this issue XD #because I know this subject can be triggering to a lot of people (myself included; see above comment about clawing and screaming and cryin) #My prefered euphemism is: Lord Bloodalot is making his advance on my nether regions #because it makes me feel like a badass general bravely defending her territory

[bootlickerhawks]

not me having a meltdown over a conversation I had over a month ago :/

#i hate having delayed emotional response #coming to terms with the fact that my best friend means more to me than i mean to her #hell i dont think she considers me her best friend anymore #i cant blame her she moved away over 5 years ago and we both suck at long distance friendship #she changed my life #if you wrote a wikipedia article abt me there would be sections abt before and after i met her #i cant say that i had the same impact #this wouldn't sting so much if i had other close friends but i just... dont #im friendly with people but i never get close to them #(thanks middle school trauma) #and every time i try to open up to people i feel guilty cuz my mom made me believe that my existence is a burden #vent #cami.txt #delete later

[definitelybeholderrpgideas]

While I'm in a dice goblin mood, it really just sucks thinking about Lucky Hand Dice.

Like before the crowdfunding campaign there was so much buzz around them, their products were selling out instantly, and it really felt like they were one of the new big up and coming dice companies.

Then after the campaign all their plans to increase production fell through to the extent that they have literally nothing to show for the $150k they raised. They're completely in the hole and are relying on other income to finish fulfilling the campaign. Honestly I don't necessarily blame them for going radio silent and trying to forget the whole thing ever happened

#sucks for those of you who spent a couple hundred bucks on them though #i got my gilded shadow d20 and have come to terms with the fact that i'll never see the sunbeam gold one i also ordered #but like if you go back and read their updates you can tell even before they ghosted us they were just really tired #and in over their heads #lucky hand dice #dice #not beholder #here's hoping there's some way we can all still get a happy ending

[poorlittlevampire]

some of y’all act like the ratio of liking to reblogging is a new problem caused by new users moving here from tiktok/insta/twitter and i don’t get that??? i remember even back in like 2013 seeing posts of people asking for people to reblog and not just like. it’s not a new problem and it’s not gonna kill tumblr lmfao. chill out

#i know it sucks to have ur work/art get more likes than rbs #like thats half of why i stopped running a fanfic blog personally #but it’s not gonna ruin this site and i think it’s important as a creator to come to terms with the fact that like #not everyone is going to like ur stuff enough to want to share it #for any reason #idk i just think its stupid to pin this on new users not knowing how to use the site #and try to scare people by saying people will stop posting on here if no one rbs #when it’s been an issue for years!!! #okay soapbox over

[un-pearable]

for the audience of exactly one who knows about it. thinking about the heart & soul au

#baby’s first actually developed and worldbuilt au… miss u #the writing was. not great. but for my first foray into an attempted extended au it’s dear to me #it’s a roleswap spirit tracks au where they have their usual backstories but link gets ghosted instead of zelda #and then zelda pretends to be link for the rest of the game #causing MUCH strife and misunderstandings. #anyway. point is i’m very much thinking about it and could def do it a much better service now than in 2019 #and i miss them <3 two stubbornest gremlins on the planet. one of whom is pissed that the other stole his identity and the other having both #multiple identity crises (including Oh Shit People Think I’m a Dude?) and is slowly becoming aware of a king and complicated conspiracy that #*LONG AND COMPLICATED screw u auto #has been working under her nose for her entire life and is coming to terms with the fact that she was. functionally useless and shit kinda #sucks. and also monarchy bad and train unions good #the appeal lies in that heart(zelda) sucks. so much. she has so many problems and no personal reflection. meanwhile soul(link) just wanted t #o get promoted and drive his train and he’s all out of A BODY TO DRIVE HIS TRAIN WITH #god i miss spirit tracks in general tbh #anyway i’m waxing nostalgia bc. leg hurtie. had a long busy but fun day bc family bday but also Extremelg tired and now in pain #so old aus :] #also. wanna make more movie tails n knux content that’s the priority for tomorrow #so uh. yeah #if you actually read this i am kissing you on the forehead tysm. have a lovely day #text✨

[parelmoer]

.

#slowly coming to terms w the fact that maybe the men that i would be attracted to just don’t exist #like sure a lot of men are beautiful gorgeous even #but then im like…… realistically i just don’t see myself in a relationship w them???? is this my deep rooted insecurity speaking or #is it something else??? #like realistically speaking i just don’t see myself walking down the street w them like we just wouldn’t look right together you know??? #is that insane of me to even think about? #and then when i find a man that im attracted to and i could perchance see myself in a relationship w i get stuck on thinking thoughts like #what if our world views aren’t compatible what if his personal hygiene sucks etc #i have not had a crush on anyone in literal years at this point i just need to make peace w being destined for solitude #also….. #never beating those lesbian allegations btw #no jk i am like 80% sure that im actually attracted to men my venus is just in virgo #(so are my sun and mercury btw but those aren’t super relevant to this situation i think)