#like fuck yeah I can skip to the fun color part and not have to worry about transferring proportions

[blainke-thoughts]

Doing some low stakes copy-over digital painting and having so so so much fun - lookit the nose. The eyebrow crease. I love painting so muchhhhh

Thank you Crowley for looking like that ily

#it took me so long to let myself do copy over painting like this and now that I have i feel free #like fuck yeah I can skip to the fun color part and not have to worry about transferring proportions #getting back into drawing is SCARY and HARD on #so I am going to use shortcuts where I need to for now #Crowley fanart #Blainkes wips

[onceuponaoneshotfanfic]

Fringe Benefits

Part of my Birthday Bash!

Request: “you’re spending more time at my desk than at your own” for Roy

Roy Kent x Reader 0.7k words Warnings: Language

“Well, well, well, what have we here?”

You turned around, smiling at Roy as he strolled into his office. He raised his thick eyebrows at you, nodding a greeting. You wondered if he could see the way your eyes flickered down his figure, checking him out, the way you could never resist doing when you saw him.

You’d been working at A.F.C. Richmond for about three months now, having been hired by Keeley Jones to manage their PR. It was a fun job and, if you were being honest, the sight of Roy Kent in those track pants was definitely a perk.

“Hey,” you hummed. “I was just leaving you a note.” You nodded at the sticky note you’d begun to write on before the sound of his growling voice interrupted you. “Got those concert tickets for you and Pheebs for Friday. But make sure you post on your Instagram, alright?” You gave his arm a playful smack. “Or I’m never doing you a favor ever again.”

A smile broke out across that handsome face. “Fuck, thanks a lot. I really appreciate it.” He paused, gazing at you thoughtfully. “This is what, the third time today you’ve been down here?” He narrowed his playful eyes at you. “I think people are starting to notice that you spend more time at my desk than you do at your own. What, you using me to get your fucking steps in?”

You rolled your eyes. Okay, maybe your crush on Roy Kent was obvious to everyone at Nelson Road. Keeley teased you about it nonstop. The players, especially Jamie Tartt, often gave you sly, knowing smiles when they saw you make your familiar way to Roy’s office. Even little Phoebe had asked you if you were her Uncle Roy’s girlfriend when she met you at a Greyhounds match- a question she repeated every time you saw her, actually.

“Come on Kent, you know I just come visit you for the snacks.” To punctuate your point, you opened one of his desk drawers and pulled out a sweet. With a wink, you popped the treat into your mouth.

Now Roy rolled his eyes at you as he approached you, standing a smidge too close, the way he’d been doing almost since the day you started working at Nelson Road. “And here I thought you came all the way down here for the pleasure of my company.”

Another sweet found its way into your mouth. “Ah, that’s just a fridge benefit, Coach.”

“Fringe benefit, eh?” Roy snorted, his cheeks tinging pink as he glanced down at the floor. Fuck, he looked adorable like this. How could a man look bashful and confident at once? And how could he look so damn good at the same time? “So, you’re basically using me to manage your sweets cravings, then?”

“Afraid so, Kent.”

He nodded as he glanced at you through his lashes. “Then maybe you let me buy you some kind of fruity drink after work today. For your cravings.” He smirked. “And the fridge benefit of my company.”

Could he see the way the color rushed to your cheeks? “O-oh. Yeah. That would be nice.” You took a step back towards the door, needing to run back to your office and call Keeley to squeal- and maybe ask her to come drop off a change of clothes. “I’ll see you after work then.” As you turned, hoping you didn’t sound as nervous as you suddenly felt, Roy cleared his throat.

“Oi.” You glanced over your shoulder, your heart skipping a beat at the sight of his cocky grin. “And see if you can get one more ticket for that concert. You don’t have plans Friday, do you?”

Oh hell. If your smile got any bigger, your cheeks would probably crack. “I’m free,” you managed. “And I’d love to go to the concert with you guys.”

Roy nodded, looking nothing short of pleased. “Right. I should let you go back to your work, then.” His expression became teasing again. “I’m sure you’ll be back down here in an hour or so. I’ll have some snacks waiting for you.”

A giggle tumbled out of your mouth as you shook your head at Roy. “I’m sure you will.” With a little wave, you strolled away, already coming up with another excuse to come back downstairs to visit Roy Kent.

#tally's birthday bash #request ❤️ #he's here he's there he's every fucking where #roy kent #roy kent x reader #roy kent fanfic #roy kent fic #roy kent fanfiction #roy kent imagine #ted lasso #ted lasso fic #ted lasso fanfic #ted lasso fanfiction

[auteurdelabre]

PLEASE, MISTER MILLER? (Sequel part 5) BFDJoel! x f!Reader

Chapter summary: You and Joel navigate long distance, your parents and the realization that college graduation is just around the corner.

series masterlist

rating: 18+

a/n: Y'all this chapter is a fuckin beast. I had to break it up because its lookin' like another marathon chapter and I am a slut for comments so I had to break it up. Please comment, reblog, all that good juju and you'll make your girl real happy.

---------------------------

I miss you. 

[HIM💜]Miss you too, baby. 

Send me a pic. 

[HIM💜]

NOT THAT KIND. 

[HIM💜]

Much better. You're cute, Miller. 

[HIM💜] You're not so bad yourself, Snowflake. 

I wish you were here, Joel. I keep waking up thinking you'll be next to me. 

[HIM💜] I feel the same, baby. I keep looking over in bed expecting to see you and that way you smile when you’re all sleepy. Then I get all blue when it's nothing but empty mattress.  

[HIM💜] Is it cheesy if I say I can't wait to hold you again?

Not at all. I’m counting down the days until graduation.

[HIM💜] Coming up quick. You excited?

Sorta. What are you doing right now?

[HIM💜] You alone?

Yep. 

[HIM💜 CALLING]

Joel's face pops up on your phone, smiling at you from what looks like a hardware store. Warmth floods you as you gaze at him. You see that he’s dressed casually, a grey t-shirt over his broad torso, a baseball cap over his tussled curls. 

"Hey, baby." He smiles broadly at you and you swear you can feel your heart skip a beat.

"Where are you?"

"Paint store." He holds up a color swatch if several shades of dark green. "Whadda ya think of this color?"

He holds the simple up closer to the camera. Some of his curls peek out near his neck under his hat. You can still feel their silken texture wrapped around your fingers like some sensual ghost. 

Fuck you miss him.

"Nice," you offer. "What's this for?"

"Wanna repaint my bedroom," he says grinning like an excited schoolchild.

“Why are you repainting your bedroom?” You ask amused. Joel’s face contorts from beaming excitement to a somber flinch and you regret asking it.

"Tess moved out last weekend," Joel says almost timidly. “And uh, I wanted to repaint. Fresh start and all that.”

Your stomach jumps at those words. Tess moved out. For the past few months you and Joel have been in regular contact via phone and texting. He mentioned that the divorce papers were drawn up, that Tess had agreed to it with an almost upsetting lack of emotion. But actually knowing that she had moved out? That feels momentous.

"Woah, so it's really over," you croak with a nervous shiver breaking out along your body. 

"Was over for a long time, baby," Joel assures you. "This just makes it official."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just feel guilty. Feel like I should be more upset but I'm just so fucking relieved." 

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

You pause, uncertain where you two stand. Yes you said you wanted to continue this together. But what does that mean exactly? Maybe now that Joel is single again he’ll want to play the field. And why not? He’s early forties, gorgeous and has the most wonderful, caring personality of anyone you’ve ever met. Why wouldn’t he want to sleep around and have fun before committing himself to a relationship again?

"You've gone quiet, baby."

You give a smile to yourself. "Just thinking."

"Thinkin' 'bout what?"

"Just that you're getting divorced, and maybe... Maybe you want to sow your wild oats or something." You cringe at your phrasing. "Maybe you don't wanna be tied down in a relationship right away.”

You aren't expecting the sharp laugh from over the line. You love how his eyes crinkle when he smiles at you. You watch him move to a corner of the store that’s a little quieter, a little more private. Then he switches the call to voice only. You raise the phone to your ear, heart thudding.

"Don't you think you're the one that should be sowing wild oats?" Joel chuckles. "You're the one in her twenties."

"Nah, I've done enough of that," you admit shyly. 

"So've I," Joel tells you and he sounds earnest. 

"Maybe you don't wanna be tied down in a relationship you know?" You offer feebly. "I mean, maybe you wanna date around or... I dunno."

You trail off feeling embarrassed. 

"Only interested in datin' one girl and it's the one I’m talkin’ to," Joel says evenly. "Same girl who has me smiling like a fuckin' idiot at my phone so much my brother commented on it at work."

You can't help but blush, even though he's not even there to see it. "Yeah?"

"Yep. Had to tell him it was a dating app just so he'd leave me alone."

You laugh at the thought. You don't know Tommy other than what Joel tells you, but he sounds like trouble. The fun kind.

“I’m lookin’ very forward to seein’ her next month,” Joel offers and you feel your lower belly pool with arousal at the sound.  “Thought I’d book us in at the same hotel but only one bed this time.”

“Mmm I’d like that,” you coo, sighing softly at the thought.

“Yeah?” Joel’s voice is so low it’s a purr. “Eager to make up for lost time?”

“Mhmmm.” You can’t help but feel the tug of lust skittering across your body. “I can’t stop thinking about all the things I wanna do to you, Mister Miller. My pussy is dripping just thinking about it. How do you wanna fuck me first?”

“Fuck,” Joel hisses out and you giggle at the sound. He turns the phone back to face time and you see his pupils blown wide.

“Don’t do that to me here, honey. Not while I’m lookin’ at paint samples. Now, be a good girl and tell me, what do you think of this one?"

He holds up the paint sample again. It’s a dark green, too dark for a bedroom in your opinion. But You think back to sitting on the hotel bed with Joel during your time together. Of him telling you that Tess took control of everything down to the color of his bed sheets and you hesitate.

You don’t want to do that to him. You don’t want to control him.

"I like it," you answer, narrowing your eyes slightly. "It's just..."

"What?"

Joel is frowning at the screen now, looking concerned at your thoughtful silence. He raises a brow when you look back at the phone. 

"It's a really nice color," you concede. "I love green."

"But?"

"But nothing."

"Baby," Joel says gently, a softness in tone that draws your gaze to his waiting eyes. "C'mon now, no lies here."

"Doesn't matter what I like."

"Matters to me."

You feel anxiety pricking at your body, making you nibble the inside of your cheek. Joel watches you through the phone, you see people wandering the aisle behind him. 

"I think it might be too dark," you finally offer. "But that's only because to me a bedroom should make you feel calm and relaxed. I've always been partial to blues. But honestly, Joel, that's just personal preference. You should get what you're drawn to. With all that green it's like you're sleeping in the forest which I know you like."

Joel nods, lower lip stuck out in thought. All of a sudden you hear a key at your door and you panic.  

"Shit, I gotta go."

The call ends just as Sarah walks into the dorm room yawning. She almost trips over the cardboard boxes the two of you had been packing earlier.

"I'm so sick of essay formatting," she says with a groan as she tosses her backpack onto the ground. 

"Same." You peek at her over your phone. "There's an iced coffee for you in the fridge."

"Have I told you lately that I love you?" Sarah sings, taking the coffee from the fridge and throwing herself on the bed next to you.  

You wouldn't love me if you knew why I bought it.

You give a short smile, giggling as she rubs her shoulder next to yours, urging you to give her more room on your bed. She's often remarked that despite you both having the same college -dorm -issued mattress that yours is far more comfortable. 

“It’ll all be worth it when I’m walking around South America with Charlie this summer,” Sarah sighs. “Three whole months of museums and delicious food and-“

“Fucking,” you finish for her. She blushes wildly before pushing you with her arm.

"I feel like you've been buying me a ton of stuff lately," Sarah muses all of a sudden. "You never let me pay for dinner and this is like the tenth time you've had coffee waiting for me. What gives?"

You force a natural looking smile on your face. 

"Dunno. Guess since we won't be roommates next year I'm just trying to enjoy you while I can."

And because I've been fucking your dad in secret for months and have no intention of stopping. 

Sarah gives a sarcastic laugh before growing somber. "Are you nervous about graduation next month?"

"A little," you say honestly, your eyes drifting from her face to the popcorn ceiling above you. "I still haven't told my parents about grad school."

"What?" Sarah drains the last of her coffee before propping herself up on an elbow and looking at you severely. "Why?"

"Dunno." 

That's a lie. You know exactly why. Because you're parents are the least supportive, most caustic people you know. Sarah frowns at you over her drink.

"You're gonna have to tell them eventually."

"Yeah I know."

“Have you seen Conrad lately?”

“Not since the trip,” you answer with a small smirk.

Thankfully you haven’t seen Conrad since that night months ago when he caught you and Joel fucking in your bed. You’ve seen him in passing around campus a few times, but he usually just goes red in the face and strides past you.

"I'm so glad you dumped him," Sarah tells you with a guilty smile. "I was so worried he was gonna propose in Ibiza and be stuck rearing his moron kids. But ever since you got back you've been different."

"Different?"

"Yeah," she nods giving a knowing smile.

She pushes herself off of the bed and goes to the boxes she’d been in the process of packing before classes. She sits herself down on the rug, staring up at you looking into middle distance, still laying on the bed.

You take a moment to covertly look through your photos of Joel. Fuck you miss him. You look at the photo of him at the gallery, of him in glasses, of the two of you in bed, of him carrying your bags to the elevator. You smile.

"Is it the married guy?" 

You don't answer. You don't want to answer. You don't want to know what Sarah thinks about you being with a married man, especially when that man is her father. 

You sit up and join her on the floor, going through the box you yourself were packing before Joel called. It’s your collection of trinkets collected during your time in school. A ticket stub from your first theatre going here, a cut out from the school paper where you’d submitted an article on the anthropology of monogamy, amongst other clutter that makes you smile.

"Well if it is, it seems like he's making you really happy," she offers tentatively. “Honestly in all the time I’ve known you I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so happy.”

“Well I did get into my Masters program,” you remind her. “And I am graduating with honors.”

“Right,” Sara concedes as the two of you continue packing up your modest dorm room, wrapping her horse figurines in newspaper. She glances over into your box of trinkets and spots the carving Joel made for you. The one that you’ve rubbed down with your thumb over months of keeping it in your pocket.

“You still have that?” Sarah says with a sweet expression on her face. “Isn’t that the one my dad carved for you?”

“Yeah,” you nod, forcing yourself to sound neutral.

“I love that you kept it,” Sarah says with a hand over her heart. “My Dad loves carving these things. I have so many from over the years. Soccer balls, horses, mermaids. Even a dragon from when I was really obsessed with them.”

You love hearing stories about Joel and so you listen intently while trying to appear casual. But every time you get a new piece of information something in you bubbles in delight. The thought of your Joel in the world maybe carving at this very moment.

 Your Joel.

 “Well it was really nice of him,” you say. “More thoughtful than anything my parents ever bought me.”

Your eyes trail to the dress hanging over the door of your closet and you sigh. The latest gift from your parents, a dress for graduation. A virginal white dress with ruffles that doesn’t suit you at all.

“Oh my God do you remember this play?” Sarah asks holding up your torn ticket. “The fucking lighting guy kept missing the cue and the actress was in darkness half the show?”

The two of you collapse into giggles at the memory and you realize with a small devastation that Sarah is the closest thing you've ever had to a best friend. She's supportive and encouraging. She helps you study, she was there for you when you broke up with Conrad, she was the first person you told about grad school because she was the one that insisted you apply. 

“Who cares what your parents think? This is your life!”

There's a very large part of you that hates how you're keeping everything from her even though you know there's no other option. It runs a thread of fear through you that makes you question how you and Joel can continue. 

Would Sarah support it? Or would she be disgusted? You don't really know. You've never been on Sarah's bad side before. When you and Joel have talked about it he's been clear that he wants to be the one to bring it up to Sarah 'if it gets to that point'. But when will you both know you’ve reached that point?

“Tell me more about married guy,” Sarah insists, nudging your knee with her socked foot. “I wanna know everything.”

“He’s…well, he’s great. Handsome and smart and he really listens to me,” you eventually admit with an amused pull of your lips. “He makes me really happy, Sarah. I’ve told him stuff I’ve never told anyone.”

Sarah’s eyes go soft. “Really?”

“Yeah.” Your eyes drop to your hands and you feel tears start at the corners. “I’ve never trusted anyone like I trust him. He makes me feel… Cared for.”

The two of you lapse into a comfortable silence as you continue packing up your dorm items. Suddenly Sarah pipes up.

“Is he good in bed?”

You try to swallow the disgusted expression on your face, but she catches it. Her eyes widen with amusement as she tosses a throw pillow at your head. You catch it, trying to will the panic from your expression.

“What?” Sarah gives a small giggle. “You used to tell me everything you and Conrad did, which wasn’t much by the way. But now you’re a vault?”

“It’s uh, just different with him,” you say quickly lowering your eyes to the newspaper you pack your collectibles in. “It feels more… special. I dunno how to describe it. Next question.”

“Are you in love with him?”

You barely pause.

“Yeah,” you nod. “Yeah I am.”

///

Sarah leaves for her evening class later that night and you sit staring at your phone. You want to call Joel and tell him how much you miss him. You want him to speak filth into your ears so you can come. You want to be in his arms with his full mouth on yours. You just want him.

The future is so precarious in many ways. When you’d received your acceptance letter into your Masters program you’d been delighted. When you’d called Joel later that day he’d been so fucking supportive it brought tears to your eyes.

And yet you couldn’t bring yourself to tell your parents. Couldn’t stand the knowledge that a man you’d known for less than six months had known exactly how to support your successes better than your own parents did.

But it’s time now. Graduation is next week and they’ll be coming out to ask your plans. They’ll take you to your fancy dinner and they’ll espouse how a future in Anthropology is a hobby. How you should have gone into Business or something more realistic. And you’ll sit there like you always do with your eyes on your plate willing the evening to be over.

Get it over with.

You punch in your parent’s number and raise your phone to your ear. Your stomach twists when you hear the sound of the phone ringing as you hold your cell to your ear. Despite the fact that you're calling them on any other line, it almost feels like the ring home seems more barren, more echo-ey. 

The phone clicks and you hear your mom bark out your name. You wince. 

"Hey mom."

"Hello. Did you get the dress?”

“Yes Mom,” you say in an obedient tone.

“Well, it’s quite late. Is anything the matter?"

"No," you say feeling your heart in your chest. "I'm calling because I wanted you to-"

"We received the graduation tickets," your mother continues, not even listening to you. "Not even assigned seating. Ridiculous."

There's something about calling home that makes you feel impossibly small and insignificant, but not in a comforting way. More the reminder that you could be squashed under foot at any moment. 

"Yes well that's why I'm calling, sort of-"

"Speak up I can barely hear you."

You sigh deeply, trying to steady your voice. "I wanted to let you and Dad know that I got into that Master's program for the fall." 

There is a loaded silence and then you hear your mother cover the phone and murmur. She’s probably telling your father. Finally her voice comes back over the line, crisp and abraisive.

"I hope you don't expect us to fund that daydream.”

You knew it was coming and yet it doesn't remove the sting entirely.

"Nope. I've got enough scholarships to cover it so far. Just need a part time job for extra expenses. I just wanted to tell...." You trail off.

You hear the sound of your father calling your mother's name in the background. 

"Your father is tired, darling. He has to be awake early and the light from the phone is keeping him up. We'll see you at graduation."

The line goes dead and you throw your cell onto the bed angrily. You can't wait until fucking graduation is over and done with. You can't wait until you're parents are out of your life for another semester.

///

Sarah’s in class. Wanna chat a bit?

[HIM💜] Can’t baby. Tommy fucked up one of the orders and I gotta get it fixed quick.

The tone is sharp and you can hear his irritation flowing through the screen. You go to type out your response when another one of his comes through to the screen.

[HIM💜] I’ll give you a ring later tonight.

It’s final, resolute. He doesn’t have time for you right now and that’s totally fine… Except his words from earlier are echoing around in your brain.  Eager to make up for lost time? Fuck yes you are. You can already feel arousal pooling between your lips.

In the months between spring break and now you’ve done your fair share of phone sex. Joel is remarkably adept at getting you off with only his voice, his words and the distant sound of his belt rasping against his zipper as he strokes himself.

You sent back racy photos every now and again, nothing too obscene for fear that Tess might see. Your face is never included for the same reason.

But right now you’re so fucking horny for him and you need to make him come for you. Probably because you know you shouldn’t bother him. It’s that bratty urge that pops its head out every once and again, urging you to push him, to test him, to make him want you, hard for you even when he shouldn’t.

You look at one of your packed boxes and are suddenly inspired. You pull the tabs open before reaching in and pulling out one of your packed winter items. The snowflake skirt. The skirt that tipped the scales in your relationship. You smile.

You shimmy out of your jeans, shirt and panties before pulling the skirt on and standing in front of the mirror. After a moments deliberation you remove your bra as well, giving yourself a once over and smiling in satisfaction.

You get onto the bed and begin to do a selection of seductive poses, aiming your camera, setting it on a timer and trying your best angles before deciding on a few that turn you on. Your first selection is the snowflake skirt hooked up over the globe of your ass. You’re leaned forward, presenting to the camera. The result is a peek of your glistening folds framed by your skirt on your pale pink sheets. Filthy.

You giggle just at the thought of sending these to Joel while he’s in the middle of work. Your fingers dance over the screen of your phone.

I miss you.

[HIM💜] I told you I was busy, baby.

You feel another bubble of laughter begin as your finger hovers over the selected thumbnail of your naked form. You toss over the idea in your head a moment before pressing send and waiting. His response is almost immediate.

[HIM💜] Are you insane? I’m at work.

I didn’t know you were gonna check your phone!

I was just sending it for later.

[HIM💜] Little liar.

Just missing you. You missing me?

[HIM💜] You know I am. Now stop it.

You can almost hear it in his growled timber. 

You giggle before sorting through your remaining photos. You send him the one of you lying on your back, tits out and pussy wet and spread wantonly with your fingers. Your skirt is bunched up around your waist. Your eyes are half lidded looking up into the camera and you bite your lower lip. It's fucking debauched and you send it with a little thrill in your stomach.

He doesn’t reply right away and a part of you is worried that he’s not checked his phone. You wait a few moments before typing out your message to him, a small smirk on your face.

I'm so wet just Thinking about your cock. How good it felt. Wish you were fucking me right now. 

[HIM💜] Quit it.

You shouldn’t be as turned on as you are, but you can’t help it. Your fingers begin to rub your clit in earnest, knowing that he’s looking at these photos at work. Knowing that he can’t just stroke his cock in his office. With your free hand you type shakily.

Wish I was sucking your cock under your desk, Mister Miller. Want you to fuck my mouth in the middle of work with people around. Wanna make you come down my throat.

[HIM💜] You like acting like a filthy little slut?

There’s the inherent menace of that statement combined with your arousal that sets the next action into motion. You press voice record and place the phone next to your head. Your breathing is heavy and labored. You imagine Joel in bed next to you, the smell of him, the way his beard rasped between your inner thighs. It’s not long before your groaning and coming hard on your fingers, whimpering his name.

With shaky breath you send the voice memo off and slip into a drowsy warmth. His response is delayed a few minutes, likely because he’s listening to it. The thought amuses and thrills you. Finally a beep sounds through.

[HIM💜] Two can play this game, baby. 

///

He doesn’t call you that evening but you’re so busy with studying for finals you don’t really notice. It’s not until your morning lecture the next day that you get a text from him. Distracted you glance at the number and see his name. With a smile you assume it's a cute message and click it, shocked when you see the very obvious erection barely hidden in his boxers. 

Your heart jumps and you glance behind you to ensure that the other classmates in your lecture hall haven’t seen. None of them glance your way; all are focused on the professor talking at the podium about your final exam next week.

WTF JOEL. I’m in class!

[HIM💜] Sorry baby. Just missing you.  

He’s not sorry at all and you both know it.

You go red in the face before dashing out of your class and into the nearest bathroom. It's mercifully empty and you take the nearest stall. You open your messages and feel a giddy thrill go through you when you see he’s sent through a video.

There's a mixture of embarrassment, terror and thrilling excitement that goes through you at the sight. Joel sent you a dirty video. He's never done that. You can only assume it's payback from your texts yesterday and you couldn't be more delighted.

You lean back against the stall, not even feeling the cool metal because you’re so focused on your cell phone. With trembling fingers you pop your ear buds in and press play. Joel's husky baritone immediately floods your ears and you close your eyes. 

"Those were some filthy fucking photos you sent me yesterday," his voice murmurs off screen, sleepy and rumbled. "And sending ‘em to me at work. Naughty girl. I was hard all fuckin’ day."

You smile gently to yourself at the thought of it. Joel stuck behind his desk, jeans tight as his erection pulses desperately. Your eyes open now and you see that he’s lifted his phone to point at his waist. He’s lying in bed, you recognize the sheets. He’s naked now, but he’s not pointing it at his cock yet.   

"Don't know that you deserve this video at all," Joel teases and you watch his lower belly twitch. "You're lucky I like you so much."

That little comment thrills you.  The camera points down, showing you the glistening head of his cock. Beads of pre-cum already dot it.

"Betcha wish you were licking this thick cock right now, aren't you my sweet little slut?"

His wide hand lazily strokes, making you whimper to yourself in the empty stall. 

"This is your come baby," Joel mutters behind the camera. "Been saving it up all day. Thinking about you and t-that... Video we made. Watched it this mornin'."

He breaks off and you watch his wide hand start to jerk his cock more hurriedly, moving more towards the head you desperately wish you were licking. 

"You looked so fucking good. T-that innocent way you looked up at me with my cock stuffed in your pretty mouth."

Your pussy is throbbing at this point, watching your sexy boyfriend jerk off for you while he babbles filth in that sexy twang of his. 

"You like being my little slut, baby?" Joel croons. "Like knowing I'm carrying around that video? Watching you suck my cock anytime I want?" 

Fuck yes you do. 

"And you look so fucking eager for it," Joel breathes and you hear that familiar urgency in his voice as he nears his climax. "So desperate to swallow my cock... Tits painted.... Painted with my come."

You’re absolutely soaked, your nipples stiff peaks under your t-shirt. You want nothing more than to be on your knees in front of him, his cock in your mouth. This is pure torture.

“And then those f-fuckin’ photos,” Joel groans and it’s a debauched sound that makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up. “That perfect fuckin’ pussy so wet for me. The way you’re.. touchin-“

Whatever he was about to say is lost in the garbled grunt of his orgasm. His hands stutter and then he comes in thick ropes spurting from between his knuckles, his moans ragged and broken from behind the screen

"All for you, baby, this come is all for you," he's rambling as he erupts. "All yours my good, good little slut."

And then the video ends. Another message has come through.

[HIM💜] Just a preview for next week. Have a great class, baby.

You stand in the stall panting and wet. You're so turned on its insane. 

How the fuck are you supposed to last until graduation?

#joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller smut #joel miller #dad joel miller #smut #pedro pascal #fanfic #fanfiction #dbf!joel #dbf!joel miller #bfdjoelmiller #bfd #joel x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel tlou #joel fanfic #joel the last of us #joel miller fic #joel miller tlou #joel miller the last of us #dad!joel miller #daddy k!nk

[ladykailitha]

A Valentine’s Day to Remember Eddie’s POV Part 1

This technically part 2. It will help to read this first. There are three parts like with the first story and will be put up once a day. I will tag for future parts if you want to be tagged, let me know. Preferably in the comments (I might miss them if you hide them in the tags ;) )

And the last part WILL be spicy. I will put the +18 under the cut so you know when it starts.

*

The Corroded Coffin boys were getting tired of Eddie mooning over Steve fucking Harrington. They didn’t have a problem with the guy himself. He had been a little douche-y in high school but they were so beyond the realm of King Steve that they weren’t even on the fucking map.

Nope.

The problem was how Eddie kept talking him up.

“Dude,” Brian sighed. “Just ask him out. You know he’s bi. You know he hasn’t dated in months. Just...something. Please, you’re killing us.”

Eddie growled. “It’s fine for you lot. You’ve all got girlfriends. You know, people you can actually take out in public and be all over without people throwing bricks at you.”

Jeff raised a single eyebrow at him.

Eddie deflated. “I know it’s hard for you and Kelsey, too. But of the two of us, I am more likely to get beaten to death for loving a boy then you are for dating a white girl.”

Jeff cocked his head to the side and then nodded. “Fair enough.”

“So go out of Hawkins for your date,” Gareth suggested. “Take him somewhere that even if people saw two dudes, they wouldn’t immediately clock you as couple.”

Eddie sighed. “This is King Steve with all the Harrington moves and shit. In what world would I be able to take him out on a date that he hasn’t been on a dozen times before.”

The other boys shared glances and grimaces. Eddie had a point.

Brian clapped Eddie’s shoulder. “You’ll come up with something. You always do.”

*

Eddie walked into Family Video to return a tape and chat with his two favorite employees.

They weren’t at the front so he wandered around trying to find them when he heard Steve whining to Robin: “I’m just going to work and then hide in my room until the fifteenth and hope to hell not too many couples come in looking for a romantic movie to ignore after fifteen minutes while they make out.”

Holy shit. This was perfect.

So Eddie did the smart thing and offered to take Steve out. Create the perfect date. Because from what it sounded like, everyone wanted the Harrington ExperienceTM but not actually Steve. And that was positively heartbreaking.

But now he had to plan. And one week to do it in. Eddie wasn’t worried, though. He had put together a four hour one-shot in thirty minutes. He just needed to do a little research first.

First stop: Nancy Wheeler

*

When Nancy came by after Hellfire Club to pick up Mike and Will Eddie pulled her aside for a moment.

“Hey, soo...” he hummed. “Not be all awkward or anything, but I’m taking Steve out for Valentine’s day and I kinda wondered...”

Nancy folded her arms and huffed. “You want to know what our dates were like?”

Eddie nodded shoving his hair in front of his face.

“Just normal date things,” she said. “Dinner and movies and stuff like that.”

Eddie frowned. “You didn’t do anything fun?”

“It was fun,” she insisted. He raised a questioning eyebrow. “It was! Though, I think a couple of previous girlfriends broke him of doing spontaneous stuff like picnics and bowling.”

“That’s really depressing, Wheeler,” Eddie said softly.

Nancy sighed. “Yeah, it kinda was. He liked that sort of thing, but I think the girls were expecting to be wined and dined because his parents were rich.”

“Noted,” he said. “Thanks.” He patted her on the shoulder and smiled.

She cocked her head to the side as he walked away. ‘You don’t want to know things like his favorite color or favorite dish or anything like that?”

Eddie turned around and grinned. “Where’s the fun in that?”

She threw her arms in the air in frustration as he just skipped away.

*

His first stop after talk with Nancy and finding out Steve’s favorite flower, was the florist.

The little bell chimed over head as he walked in.

A very harried looking woman at the counter looked up at him in dread. “If you want roses you’re shit out luck. There is no place in the surrounding area that has them. Please don’t ask.”

Eddie grinned. “Then you, fair lady are in luck. Because I’m not looking for roses.”

She eyed him skeptically. “Yeah? What are you looking for then?”

He pulled out the piece of paper Steve had given him. “All-strow-mary-ahs?”

Her face cleared of fatigue and she blinked. “Alstroemarias?”

Eddie beamed. “That’s the one. I’m looking for six pink and six red.”

“Come with me,” the florist said waving him to follow her to the back room. Eddie bounced up to her and let her lead him to the cooler that held all her remaining flowers. The biggest section held these small lilies of every color. Orange, purple, blue, white, pink, red, even some with multiple colors.

“Are you sure you just want pink and red?” she asked, waving her arm at her selection.

“All these are al-alstr-” he stammered.

“I just call them alstroes,” she said taking pity on him. “It’s easier.”

Eddie sighed in relief. “So all these are alstroes?”

She nodded. “Pretty flower.”

He could only agree. The red ones were bright and not dark the way roses tended to be and the pink ones were the color of the blush on Steve’s cheeks when Eddie told him it was a unique choice. He loved them.

Eddie hummed. “Yup, just the two colors, please.”

The florist smiled. “When do you want them delivered?”

He blinked. “Um...would it…I mean, I would like to pick them up myself, if that’s okay.”

She shrugged. “Sure. People just prefer to get them delivered because the store could be pretty hectic that day.”

Eddie sighed in relief. “No, no. I want to hand them to them directly.”

If she noticed the absence of any gendered pronoun she wisely said nothing. “You can also write a card to go with if you’d like. Or you can choose a standard greeting.”

Eddie pursed his lips together and licked them nervously. “I’d like to write it myself.”

She handed him the card and a pen. He carefully wrote out the note, blushing darker than flowers he was about to buy.

He handed her the card back, shoving hair into his face.

The florist looked at the card and smiled. “The language of flowers. So that’s why you wanted the specific colors.”

Eddie nodded. “I got a book out from the library. Wanted to make Valentine’s day extra special.”

She filled out the order form and using a paper clip added the card to the front of it.

“When would you like to pick up the flowers?” she asked.

“4pm.”

She wrote it down. “All right that will be $3.95.”

Eddie pulled out his wallet and paid the amount. This was the hardest part. Spending the money to make Steve happy. Not that he thought he had to spend a lot on Steve. No, the problem was that Eddie wanted to. But he also knew he had to keep to a budget as to not completely blow this out of proportion.

*

Whenever Eddie needed to know something over the course of the week, he would just ask Steve. Because just because his favorite color was green two years ago didn’t mean that it was still his favorite color. Which coincidentally it wasn’t.

Steve had called it baby blue but it was more cerulean. It was a pretty color blue if Eddie was pressed. It certainly brought out the hazel in his brown eyes.

Which was not a thing Eddie noticed. No. Nope. Nope. Not at all.

He called the florist to update the order to new color of tissue paper to wrap the flowers in. The florist nearly sobbed in relief when he said he didn’t want pink, red, or white.

Eddie had agreed to take his sheep to the arcade because he was going to be busy on Saturday. He knew that realistically that most of them had dates anyway, and wouldn’t want play that day either, but it was still something he could do for them instead of DMing that week.

“Look, man,” Eddie was complaining to Dustin, “I have a budget for this shit, I can’t just go to the fanciest restaurant in town and drop $20 on dinner. Not to mention this late in the game, there is no way I’m even going to get a foot in the door let alone get a reservation.”

They were waiting in the Wheeler’s front room on Mike, who was taking forever.

Nancy’s eyes narrowed.

“I’m coming with you to drop the kids off,” she announced just as Mike walked out.

“What? Why?” Mike asked.

“Because I need to go to the store, and Eddie can take me,” she said in the tone that booked no argument.

Eddie shrugged. “There’s plenty of room, I don’t see why not.”

She smiled, wrinkling her nose and Eddie gulped.

Eddie picked up the rest of the gremlins and dropped them off at the arcade. He turned to Nancy and said, “So what’s this really about?”

She smiled sweetly. “I’m going to teach how to make Steve’s favorite dishes and then you can decide candlelit dinner at your place or a picnic. I don’t really care which.”

Eddie blinked and then eyed her suspiciously. “Why are you helping me?”

Nancy sighed. “The one Valentine’s day Steve and I had together, I spent looking into Barb Holland’s death.” She looked down at her hands. “She was my best friend and I hated not knowing what happened to her. Steve was supportive. Because of course he was. But I threatened him that if he bought me so much as flowers or chocolates, I was going to shoot him.”

Eddie winced. “And then the last two Valentine’s days were just shit for the guy...”

She nodded. “I don’t think Steve’s had a good Valentine’s day since elementary.”

Eddie chewed his lip. “All right let’s do this. What all do we need?”

Nancy’s smile was sweeter as she patted his cheek.

Part 2 Part 3

Tag List: @zerokrox-blog @bidisastersworld @swimmingbirdrunningrock @madamonsieur-silvrene @artiststarme @samcoxramblings @maya-custodios-dionach @bejeweledbaby @spreckle  @a-little-unsteddie @krazyperson @princess-josephina @wonderland-girl143-blog @plutoshelm @newtstabber@bookbinderbitch @darkwitchoferie 

#My writing #stranger things #steddie #valentine's fic #ladykailtiha writes

[dark-night-hero]

Imagine leadguitarist! Tartaglia meeting his significant other for the first time.

Imagine being part of a different band yourself when you came across into hearing that there was a new rising band full of promising members you can't help but to raise a brow but not like you care, having to be proud and confident of your own gro-

"I heard the lead guitarist is much better than (First name)" "Wait. For real? But isn't like (First name) a top tier?" "Yeah I know, but this new guy had some skills and much better looks! I heard they're having a gig this week end, let's go!"

Imagine the look on your face as your band mates snicker- the others laughing at you as the two random stranger that manage to irk you off walked out of the cafe you and your friend/band mates are currently in right now.

Imagine the way you roll your (eye color) eyes, brushing back your (hair color) locks in frustration. You'd rather accept the fact that they were a better hand than having a better lead guitarist than you. Fuck that.

Imagine being grumpy the whole following days of the week minus the times where you have to perform right in front of the other people for your band gigs.

Imagine as you smile brightly in front of the crowd, obviously enjoying the joy of performance you were giving for your supporters that came in tonight. There was a certain ginger head among the crowd that you have failed to notice. Right beside him was his fellow bandmates.

Imagine as that ginger head stand alongside the crowd whom was obviously having fun, he was staring intensity at the lead guitarist on the stage, you, who was smiling confidently at the crowd, sweat dripping down your forehead down to your chin and into your neck.

Imagine the way he gulps, hand going into his mask as he try to cover his already masked mouth as he stare at you overall mesmerizing. Fuck this, he and his bandmates just came here to see what your band was all about, the one that seems to be competing with them.

"Fuck." He took a step back, then look at his band mates, luckily they seems to be in their own world as they to observe the band performing right in front of them.

Imagine as he once again glance at the stage, then as soon as he did, his heart skipped a beat upon meeting those (eye color) iris. And then you smile and wave at him, a simple gesture to the crowd of fans and yet it send him a mini heart attack and brain malfunction.

"Holy shit!" He whispered to himself, feeling a blush creep up on his neck all the way to his cheeks. Never have he ever felt so thankful wearing a mask right now.

Imagine friday that week before the weekend, as you yawn walking out of your finish lecture on the campus, you noticed a ginger head out the door perhaps because of its color and eventually brush it off, having things to do such as meeting up with your bandmates to talk about somethings.

Imagine as you walk pass him, adjusting the bag strap on your shoulder, you heard a voice behind you, calling out your name, making you turn around. It's the ginger head.

"Yes? What can I do for you?" You raise a brow, you really got some things to do. "Please come to our gig this weekend. I really want you to see me play." "Hah?" You didn't mean to say it out loud, and yet you did with a flabbergasted look on your face.

Imagine before you knew it, four sets of ticket was shoved into your hand as you watch the ginger head skipped steps away from you, looking all happy and excited. You just stood there a couple of second before looking down on the tickets in your hand.

"DCKZ?" Reading the name of the out loud. You could not help but to burst into fits of giggle. "I got things to do this weekend but this seems a little more interesting." Besides didn't that guy said he wants you to see him play?

"Isn't that the band were they say that has a better lead than you?" "Hah?" You look at your band mates wide eyes. "Yeah, as far as I know thats the name of their band. You know, were the lead guitarist much better than you and look far more better than you." Your bandmates laugh, obviously teasing you. "I mean great timing, we don't have to buy a ticket since we already got them, I mean the ticket has been sold out anyway."

Imagine the blank look on your face, the feeling of rage swirling inside you at that very moment. "Say, do you know what that lead guitarist looks like?" "Hmm? Not sure, but one thing for sure is that his hair is ginger, ginger head." "Right.."

Imagine the look on your face that makes your bandmates flinch and look away. At it again, they thought. Poor guy, (First name)'s going to kill you. "That guy.." You don't really know what he's up to. But he should have known better than to give you a ticket to their gig just so he can show off.

Imagine taking a deep breath to calm yourself down, once again looking at the remaining ticket in hand as your bandmates already have taken theirs. Fine, you want to show off you're better than me? Let's see once I see you on the stage looking like shit.

Imagine, Tartaglia on the other hand just going on excited about the fact that you were actually going to watch them him play. The feeling of something on his chest with just the thought of you coming makes him want to give his best to perform.

Imagine as you actually stand in front of the stage, eyes locked in into the certain handsome ginger head on the stage that seems to have taken your breath away. He was shining, the way he smiles, the way his fingers played with the guitar strings. He was glowing.

Imagine as you gulp, as your eyes met. His blue iris telling you something, seems to be hoping for something as he stare at your (eye color) ones. Then unexpectedly, in the middle of the crowd, you chuckle.

"You actually play well, bastard."

[ⓒdark-night-hero] 2022°

#genshin impact #genshin imagines #genshin #childe x reader #tartaglia x reader #tartaglia #guitarist tartaglia #genshin band au #band au #childe tartagalia #childe

[penname-artist]

I need more of asshole baby cabbie neow

he's so cute I swear 🥺

A'ight the fact that I broke out my calculator trying to magically whip up numbers on how big a baby Cabbie would be, you know this'll be a long answer lol. I did the math for this shit XD

(literally skip to the green part if you don't want to hear me ramble about numbers and things)

Even as a baby I cannot believe how freaking BIG a baby Cabbie would be. His full adult weight - so says wikipedia - is about 40,000 pounds empty, and 64,000 gross (so like, fueled and packed and ready to go). Roughly, really really roughly here is what I'm basing this off of, baby horses are like 10-ish percent of their adult weight when they're born, and with human babies it's maybe like 5%ish of adult weight or so, roughly.

Putting that onto baby Cabbie here, if you applied that to him he'd be 2,000 lbs (5%) at smallest, and 4,000 lbs (10%) to 6,000 lbs (15%) at most. That's still a big ass fuckin' baby!! That's multiple tons, and I highly doubt Cabbie was a small birth by any means. He was most likely closer to the 4-6k lbs range, so we're going to just staple this in the book now that he was probably born at about 5,000 lbs.

ANYWAYS normal person headcanons now that don't require my brain juices. Made in fun colors for extra happiness stimulation:

Baby Cabbie was, definitely, a little asshole. He was particularly mouthy for a baby, and chewed (or at least gummed on) just about everything within reach. If it CAN go in mouth, it WILL go in mouth

Despite being that big (probably like 9-10 feet in length, if we're still doing the "kind of 10%" thing) he was about as indestructible then as he is now. He just wasn't really ever a crier, he was a quiet baby. Big sleeper, big on sleep (I mean it's all he ever got til his teens)

Remember the mouthy thing? Yeah he was grabby with stuff too, especially when his teeth were in. You'd have seen him throwing his weight around in the backyard with a giant fucking stick in his mouth

He had two sisters - one older and one younger - that were around the same weight as him, so he had others to play with oftentimes. I can't even say that he was unevenly matched, they all bit the shit out of each other equally.

#disney planes #disneyplanes #planes fire and rescue #disney planes 2 #cabbie #cabbie mchale #help how big are newborn baby planes

[blastthechaos]

Naejunko

All of them

All

Of

Them

All the rainbow colors

Well maybe not the pink ones I'm to soft for that sexual stuff, accept the after care that is wholesome enough for me to ask!

I'm still gonna do Pink but I'll put a warning so you know when to skip it.

For context, there's gonna be a 'Canon' universe which is one where Makoto and Junko were in a relationship but the canon events did happen (as in Junko plunged the world into Despair and the Killing game still happened) and a Non-Despair universe which is basically UTDP and DRS.

This is under a Read More because holy fuck is this shit long

RED! Romantic Headcanons

A. What made them fall in love:For Junko it was the fact that no matter what she did, she couldn't break Makoto physically or mentally, he was unpredictable due to his luck and she couldn't crush his hope no matter how hard she tried, he was...different, entertaining, even though he was constantly annoyed by her and foiled her plans whenever he could he still cared about her, plus he was a constant source of Despair for her since she keep losing and losing to some "nobody", it was a lot of factors basically.

For Makoto is because of how she made him feel, he never got as mad to anyone as he ever had towards Junko, she always made him drag up all the anger he often kept inside of him which was...therapeutic in a way. She always made his life fun with trying to prevent her from causing problem and her trying to kill him. Plus he fpund out there's a glimmer of a good person inside so he wanted to see if he could drag it out of her...or just enjoy spending time with her as she was, he even found out stuff about himself he would have never found out if it wasn't for Junko.

Basically, their lives changed forever because of each other...for better or for worse in various ways.

B. First kiss:It happened one time after one teasing too many, Junko keep teasing Makoto about his crush on her and he was getting sick of it up til one point he decided "fuck it", grabbed Junko by the arms to pull her down and kiss her.

Junko never shut up about her being right and being so happy for her new boyfriend, but seeing her surprised face after the kiss made it worth it in Makoto's eyes.

C. Do they like physical intimacy (holding hands, cuddling, sex):Yes, a lot, it took a bit for Makoto to be comfortable with it (since he's still a little tsundere about it, Junko was all for it) but these two can not keep their hands off each other.

D. How affectionate are they with each other:They both have a "Hate-Love" kind of relationship (cause that's how they work) but even their insults at one point just felt like compliments the way they say it.

So yeah, they're very affectionate with each other, though Makoto still tries to reign it in a little, to...less than successful results.

E. What are their kisses like:Depends on the time and mood, often it's just a quick 'see you later' kiss, other times when Junko is super excited or happy she grabs him and kisses him by surprise, other times Makoto grabs her arms or tie to drag her down and kiss her.

F. Where do they like to kiss/be kissed:Aside from the lips, they like to kiss each other in the cheek or forehead.

G. Who said 'I love you' first:Junko was the first one to say it, she went into a big tirade about how annoying and disgusting he was for being so unkillable and so full of hope, then going on about how she loved these same traits, it culminated in her saying "I hate and love you so much!"

H. What is their reaction to 'I love you': Makoto couldn't for the life of him understand what she meant by that, he even thought this was an attempt to trick him or make him suffer despair, once he understood what she meant ans that it was genuine he felt...weird.

When Makoto told her he hated and loved her too Junko felt like the heavens, she was bouncing all over the place and was so happy she actually felt a tiny bit of hope and puked afterwards...she was still happy.

I. How often do they say 'I love you':Relatively often, Junko says it ore than Makoto.

J. What are their thoughts on PDA:They're a firm fan of this practice, they aren't afraid of doing it in public and screw anyone else who has a problem, even Makoto has no problem because Junko is always so happy about it.

K. What makes their heart race:For Junko, it's seeing Makoto just overcome anything people (including her) throw at him and keep going, it's seeing him trampling her plans she worked so hard for, it's seeing him be kind to her despite how she treats him (even if he wants to pretend he doesn't like her all that much).

In fact, in the 'canon' universe, she was happy when it was her time to go because both the immense despair she felt but seeing Makoto in all his glory, like a reminder of why she fell in love with him (and more despair because she threw it all away).

For Makoto it was often foiling her plans and avoiding whatever scheme she has to kill him, it's when he sees her motivated or happy about something because it means she's feeling happy and entertained, that she's not hurting herself with despair, although he does like to see her in occasional small despair because it means she's happy even if he doesn't like it.

L. Do they like to share their feelings:Yup, very much so...Ok Makoto is more tsundere about it because she often annoys him or makes him mad so he doesn't like to show her she's right...but he really fools nobody with this act.

M. How do they express love:Junko tends to climb to Makoto like a cat or jump into his arms when she feels excited and happy, often she hugs him out of nowhere and drags him by the hand when she wants to show him something...she also attempts to kill several times, because she knows she will fail no matter what she does.

Makoto is a bit more reserved when it comes to that, but he often just grabs her hand tight to reassure her he's there for her, he often gets her gift that he gets from the gashopon machines while making sure it's something she likes, he also doesn't throw her off him when she climbs to him and even carries her around when she does...he also foils her plans to give her that sweet despair of failure, even if he doesn't like it.

There's actually a multitude of ways they express their love, but these are a few of them.

ORANGE! Emotional Headcanons

A. How protective are they towards each other:Junko is more lax with Makoto's protection, but that's due to the fact they both know he can't die no matter what, a magical unicorn appearing out of nowhere is more likely that Makoto's luck ever running out, she still has some instances where she gets worried for his safety.

Makoto, on the other hand, is very protective of Junko. Because he knows she doesn't share his luck and that she has many enemies and people wanting to inflict payback on her, so he always looks out in case something seriously bad might happen to her.

B. What makes them excited:Their usual routine is exciting enough.

C. What makes them happy:Just spending time with each other and seeing the other happy is enough to get them happy, Makoto gets extra happy when Junko is having a good time without despair.

D. What makes them anxious:There's time Junko worries one of her plans is gonna be the one that succeeds on killing Makoto, Makoto is worried that Junko is gonna do something that's too far for him or that she might actually be hurt or even killed.

E. What makes them sad: When they can't spend time with each other, although not by much, Junko's despair obsession often gets Makoto sad because he knows she doesn't actually enjoy it all that much.

The events of the 'canon' universe is just a big sad event from both of them, Junko knows her plans effectively ruined any future they could have had and knows that Makoto is gonna hate her for real after this even if he survives and recovers his memories, she knows she'll never see him again after she dies and the only solace she has is that the Despair she'll suffer from this was gonna be amazing. Makoto is just utterly dissapointed and sad after what she did, not only did she throw the world into ruin, not only did she betray the entire relationship they created together, not only did she force their friends to kill each other...but she also died and he would never see her again, at that point while he was still the SHSL Hope he was never the same after that.

F. What makes them angry:Insulting Makoto is enough to get Junko angry, only she gets to do that! Also trying to deprive her from him.

The same is also true for Makoto, threatening, trying to hurt or actually hurting Junko is enough to get him pissed at you and try to throw hands no matter the result, he knows that on some level Junko does deserve some of the bad things that happen to her (he's not blind to the fact she's not a good person) but he doesn't care.

On another note, they quite often get made at each other, Makoto for the plans to cause Despair and her attempts at killing him and Junko gets mad at Makoto for foiling them, but it's part of their routine and they make up in record time.

G. What triggers them:I...had nothing to add here, sorry.

H. What makes them jealous:Junko often gets jealous of other girls Makoto is friends with, because she knows all of them are better people than her and probably better for Makoto a "normal girlfriend"

Makoto often gets jealous of guys that get close to Junko because he feels he's nothing special and Junko could be doing better.

But both of them at the end of the day knows they love each other and nobody else, that they have nothing to be jealous off.

I. Do they have bad temperament: Junko it's easy to get on her bad side (though never to the extent Makoto does in canon) and get pissed at you, she also gets annoyed at Makoto often for being....well, him.

Makoto is hard to get on his bad side (unless you're Junko, which she does with ease) but man if you're an actual evil piece of shit he will want to fucking beat you to the ground and even cuss at you, just ask Monokuma and Junko in canon, he will try to throw down even if he knows it will end badly for him.

J. Do they have self-control:Junko...not really when it comes to her despair obsession, though she knows when to reing it back a little, she also has self-control when it comes to Makoto when needed.

Makoto does have self-control, he often holds back his more mean comments to himself...though if you're evil that flies off the window, he also has self-control when it comes to Junko.

K. How do they comfort each other:They often held the other's hand when the other is upset or sad and stay as close as possible. Junko actually holds back on causing problems while Makoto sets up pranks on himself so he could make her laugh.

YELLOW! Mental Headcanons

A. Do they have insecurities:Pretty much what was mentioned on the jealous section.

B. Are they dependent on each other:Not really, they both are able to exist perfectly without the other...but their lives wouldn't be the same if it happened after they meet each other, they felt they...complete each other in a way.

C. How empathic are they towards each other:This one is a bit tricky to answer because they effectively embody the polar opposite of the other (Hope and Despair) so it's hard to feel empathetic to someone like that...but they manage.

D. What secrets would they never want each other to know:Makoto generally doesn't have any embarrassing secrets he wouldn't want her to know (aside from the wet the bed one), Junko often keeps her past under wraps and it takes a while for Makoto to find out her origins (and not an outlandish lie she tells him).

But for Junko in the 'canon' verse, the tragedy she orchestrated is something she doesn't want Makoto to know so he doesn't stop it until the right time...and eventually it's also because she knows he'll hate her.

E. How do they react to the other being vulnerable:They get surprised because it's not often the other is vulnerable but they handle it with as much care as possible...though Junko sometimes tries to take advantage of it to cause him despair, though it never works and she doesn't even bother to try hard (though even if she did try hard it wouldn't work).

F. What makes them worry about each other:Pretty much already explained above, Makoto often worries Junko's despair obsession will end badly for her (which it does in the 'canon' verse).

G. What do they find mentally attractive about each other:Junko finds Makoto's mental resilience as annoying as it is attractive, she also finds it attractive how smart he is and how good his memory is.

Makoto does find her smarts attractive, and while they cause him a headache, he also loves her "Multiple Personalities" just as much as her.

H. How do they make each other laugh:Junko once in a blue moon makes a joke that actually makes Makoto laugh, she actually tries to make Makoto laugh as much as possible.

Makoto is able to make Junko laugh simply by having a prank played on him.

I. How do they react on each other's emotions:I think it be redundant what I put here.

GREEN! Spiritual Headcanons

A. Do they have any fears?: Pretty much what I already elaborated before.

Through one primal fear Junko has is Makoto's luck running out and him dying or her finally breaking him, because then she'll have just broken Makoto like everything else she touch, it would mean Makoto wasn't the one, her other half, the unmovable object to her unstoppable force, that the one that countered her and was perfect for her died and never really existed to begin with, because there wouldn't be anyone else for her.

She's also afraid he will leave her behind like Mukuro did.

Makoto also has a profound fear of losing Junko because he knows his luck cannot protect her, he fears that something might happen to her and he would not be able to do something about it.

There's another fear he has in which he's afraid if Junko dropped her despair obsession and was 'healthier' she wouldn't be the woman he fell in love with, but shrugs it off and decides that if that ever happened he support her like always and care for her happiness.

B. Do they have any hopes?:Junko would kill you for saying that Honestly they just want to spend their lives together and that if there is an afterlife that they can spend it together too.

C. Do they believe in soulmates:Junko does, Makoto doesn't have an opinjon on the subject...but both of them think they're each other's soulmate and that is that.

In the 'canon' universe, Makoto never got with anyone else after Junko died.

D. What's their spiritual connection like:They're two sides of a coin (Hope and Despair), so I leave that to your criteria.

E. What are their common goals:To keep their battle of Hope VS Despair (albeit only between themselves Makoto wants) and just spend their life together.

F. How do they complement each other:Makoto manages to drag out the goodness that's inside Junko and also gives her an unbreakable target to her tendencies while Junko brings up Makoto more assertive side and helps him de-stress

G. What are their plans for the future:Junko already has a solid career as a model and with her analytical talent she can easily find work somewhere else...and even then she has enough money to probably sustain themselves for a long, long time.

Makoto wants to work in Hope's Peak to foster talent much like they did with his class and others, Junko helps him in weeding out the corruption of the place for shits and giggles...and cause she likes him.

H. What values do they believe in:I think this one speaks for itself.

I. How do they help each other grow:Again, Makoto helps drag out the goodness in Junko and gives her an indestructible target for her more dangerous tendencies, which means wonders for the rest of the world. Junko meanwhile helps Makoto get a purpose in life and to become more assertive and confident in himself (whether intentional or not). She was also the one who helped him discover that his Luck talent is an actual thing and helped him discover he was the Super High School Level Hope.

CYAN! General Relationship Headcanons

A. Do they fight:Yeah, but as I mentioned before they're often not really serious and they make up quickly.

B. How do they handle conflict:They go cool off and return later to talk it with more calm.

C. How is their communication:Surprisingly good (though in the 'canon' universe there's a few...issues you see)

D. What's their love language:A little bit of all 5 of them.

E. Favorite qualities in their partner:Junko I already mentioned pretty much all that she loves about Makoto.

Makoto loves her energy, excitement, how childish she can be at times, he loves all her personalities, her occasional showings of kindness, how funny she can be and other traits.

F. Least favorite qualities:I think I already pointed out what they don't like of the other.

G. Do they have nicknames/pet names for each other:Aside from the insults they fling at each other, it's "Sweetie" from Junko's side and "Sweetheart" from Makoto's side.

H. Favorite dating spots:Many of them, though one unusual one is Hope's Peak, even after they graduate Makoto occasionally makes some arrangements to have a date with Junko there.

I. What gifts do they like to exchange:Makoto often gets Junko a lot of stuff that he gets from the Gashopon Machines, he even gets her Dragon Quest games when he can.

Junko always tries to get him something nice, she even gets him stuff that she's sure he likes a lot and not just "trendy" stuff cause he knows he likes more stuff than that.

J. What are their important gestures toward each other:Junko tends to hug Makoto from behind and stays hugging him, sometimes she even peeks out from his hair (since she's in perfect height for that), she often does that show her love and that she feels safe with him.

Makoto often puts his arm in front of Junko when he feels there's a threat and never lets it down until he's sure things are safe.

They both also hold hands and never let it go in certain moments to reassure that they're together in this.

VIOLET! Daily Life Headcanons

A. Who is in charge of cooking:Junko, she's a good cook with her Analytical ability...but also because she doesn't want Makoto with his..."unique" taste in foods to get in charge of cooking...though she eventually just accepts it.

B. What good habits do they have:Makoto always makes sure Junko takes care of herself and is safe while Junko always steps in when someone seems like abusing Makoto's kindness.

C. What bad habits do they have that annoy the other:I feel this is redundant to answer.

D. Favorite vacations and getaways:Jabberwock island when there's no evil plan being caused by Monokuma, also Towa City.

E. Favorite sleeping position:Both of them cuddling together with Junko putting Makoto's head in her ****

F. What are their daily routines:Wake up, go to class, Junko tries to make a plan to cause despair only to get foiled by Makoto, she tries to kill him, fails, hang out together and generally stuff like that.

G. How do they spend time together:Read above.

H. Do they spend time on each other hobbies:Yup, they often play videogames together and do other stuff.

I. What are their best memories together:All of them are their best memories, but to be more specific in the night before their graduation Junko cried tears of joy upon realizing that no matter what she did she couldn't get rid of Makoto, which means she found the one person she couldn't fuck up and couldn't get rid of, she found the one person that could make her happy.

Makoto doesn't have an specific best memory, but he considers everytime Junko was truly happy and smiling to be one of his best memories in his life.

PINK! Sexual Headcanons

NSFW Part, skip this if you don't want to see it!

A. How they approach:Generally Junko tries to temp Makoto or teased him until he had it and pounded her.

B. Favorite position:Doggy Style (I'm an unimaginative virgin, sorry about the lack of knowledge in this area)

C. Kinks:Discipline, Bondage, Puppy Play, Spanking, BDSM, Pussy Torture, chastity belt, Roleplay, Butt plug, hatesex, humiliation, etc.

Also, just to make it clear, Makoto is the dom and Junko is the Sub.

D. Favorite body parts:I guess Junko likes her...tits? And Makoto his...cock? I don't understand this one unless they refer to which part they to be played with on their own body.

E. Favorite partner's body parts:Junko loves Makoto's ass, a lot, she actually asks him to sit on her face.

Makoto tries to hide it but his favorite part of Junko is her...tits, he's ashamed of admitting it cause it's the most obvious vanilla answer but Junko reassures him that it's ok and she doesn't mind, she's flattered actually.

F. What they like:Makoto often likes topping Junko even if he wants to pretend he doesn't, mostly because he refuses to even back down or submit against Junko, Junko meanwhile likes to be dommed by Makoto because the 'Despair' of having a loser foiling her plans and then dominating her (In reality though they just like being like this to each other). They both also like getting touchy with others in public (but never actually anything explicit), Junko also likes to incite Makoto's more possessive side and to break his Tsundere facade by making him jealous on purpose, Makoto responds by wrapping his arms around her waist (and maybe touching her butt) and dragging her away because he already knows she wants that.

Junko also calls Makoto daddy...cause daddy issues you see.

G. What they don't like:Well aside from Makoto not wanting to be a sub (he allows himself to be when Junko wants it but he's kinda bored during it and doesn't even bother to act subby), though that one isn't usually a problem because Junko prefers him to be dom.

Also they don't like getting interrupted, but that goes without saying.

H. Do they like eye contact:Yup, they like getting to look at each other while doing it, even while doggy style which is a bit...awkward, but they still try.

I. Favorite places to get dirty:Honestly be easier to list where they don't want to get dirty, Junko can gets mischievous so she wants to do it in certain...places and have others not realize, meanwhile Makoto tries to talk her out of it...but decides not to.

But their favorite place is doing it in the Headmaster's office, so they can roleplay Makoto being the headmaster and Junko a troublesome student.

They still do it when Makoto actually becomes the Headmaster.

J. Aftercare:Makoto hugs Junko, asks her if she's alright and not hurt, then caresses and cuddles with her after she reassures him she's not and that she had an amazing time, then they sleep with Makoto being the large spoon.

Holy shit that was a long part, it took me hours to write all this...but I'm happy that I did, happy that I got to talk about my OTP and Happy that I got this out of the way

NSFW PART END

#Danganronpa #Makoto Naegi #Junko Enoshima #Naejunko #Naeshima #Trigger Happy Havoc #the end of hope's peak high school #Ultimate Summer Camp #THH #TEOHPHS #USC #DR #DR3 #DRS #I might have checked out in some of these #Sorry it's just was a lot and I was getting tired

[fichtfoxfuchs]

Fandom asks: 3, 5, 6 & 23! ^^ You can skip any if you don't have anything to say or don't want to answer to! /gen

Oh, lovely, LOVELY picks !

Thank you so, so MUCH Madness for the ask, and for the challenging picks :D I shall do my best to answer them, but I am so happy and hyped ! It might cover fandoms you are not interested in, but I hope the answers will interest you and the post will be enjoyable !!!!!!

Let's begin !

3. A character that fandom has helped you appreciate

Wesson (Rod's character in the Dirty Gary short movie !). I wasn't that involved with the character in itself because while I just appreciated and loved watching Rod in an acting gig, I didn't love the character to the extend of wanting to write about him. But fandom indeed happened, and working on a common project with a friend and discussing the character with another, they made me appreciate him more and more, and now he is one of my numerous blorbos XD

5. Something you see in fics a lot and love

It's so simple but yet so lovely, and it's just reading people's takes on my favorite ships. I love to see how many shapes love between characters can take, be them deep friendships, QRPs, enemies to lovers, boyfriends. I just love reading my favorite men being tender with each other, I love softness. I think I wanna indulge in soft romance shots from the near future, I don't know why, but I feel like I need it XD But yeah. I love seeing love win, no matter its shapes. This is the most wonderful part of fanfiction me thinks.

6. Something you see in art a lot and love

Dramatic situations (I am a sucker for drama, I don't know if you noticed XD /j), poetry, and on drawings, I am just in awe with watercolors. I'd love to make art with watercolors. It is similar to watercolors, but I just love seeing the work on colors from artists. I think it's a beautiful hobby to draw, and I love seeing people's art and fanarts because it is a rendition of their love and appreciation for life/for a media, I just dig it, ya know. And poetry is something I wanna achieve also, because I find so many things absolutely beautiful and I wanna share my feelings and my love for them. Poets have my deepest admiration to be honest. As well as artists.

Writers too. I just don't think of myself belonging in the artsy writers league. Would kill to be able to write things that are art. But I don't know how people do that XD

23. The fandom you're curious about because of a mutual

And it's actually a Tumblr mutual who has posted about that fandom for weeks on end at some point, and it just caught my interest, and I'd love to read the manga. The fandom in question is Bleach, and they got me curious enough to want to read the manga XD

I hope the answers are still enjoyable even tho it's not necessarily about fandoms that you like yourself. Thank you again so fucking MUCH for sending these questions, they were quite challenging ! My answers on art isn't really fandom related, but hey XD I do what I want XD

Thank you again so much, it was fun :D

#answering mcrmadness #It's not a long post but I am still happy with my answers. Got so hyped and delighted to receive these questions :D #You chose well. Very well if I may say so :D

[boobabietch]

Snickerdoodle cookies | Robin Buckley x fem!reader

Warnings: mentions of food i guess? But nothing literally nothing this is pure fluff (if I skipped something you are free to tell me)

A/N: Hellooo this is Sof here! This is the first time I wrote for Robin and first time writing a one shot as well so it might suck a little bit but I promise I did my best. English is not my first language (I’m a Mexican so you can talk to me in Spanish too if you want) so if there are any mistakes please please tell my so I can change them asap. Love Sof :)

Word count: 907

It was a nice afternoon in Hawkins, the summer came to an end, bringing with this the chilly breeze and orange colors of autumn.

Having a girlfriend like Robin Buckley was fun, but sometimes very weird. The girl is often bored when she is not doing anything specific, l like she is always craving for something to do with her hands and her mind. Then this specific thing would get boring in a couple of minutes, making her drift out of any concentration she managed to have.

You two would be lying on your bed without anything to do. Robin’s head was on your lap while you caressed her hair. “Hey, wanna make snickerdoodle cookies?” She said lifting her head a little bit to look at you.

You pondered that question for a second but then a thought crossed your mind -your mom went to visit your grandma taking with her the recipe book with the directions for the cookies- “I’m sorry robs but it’s going to be another time, my mom took with her the recipe” She lifted her head completely out of your lap this time and sat beside you looking at you “Come on Y/N! We’ve been making those cookies since we were 13. I'm pretty sure we know the recipe from the inside out!” Yeah that works for you.

Apparently all those times you made snickerdoodle cookies with Robin your mom helped a little bit. Well maybe a lot. Now that you remember your mom did everything while you and Robin just weighed the ingredients and ate the raw cookie dough while making heart shaped eyes to each other when you thought your mom wasn’t looking.

Step 1. Preheat the oven to 400º degrees.

You guys totally skipped this part. Like what the fuck does preheat even means!

Step 2. Place the softened butter, sugar, eggs and vanilla in a bowl and mix until smooth.

Robin put the butter (not soft at all, maybe even slightly frozen) while you measured the sugar and vanilla.

“Wait, how much sugar do we need?” You ask not remembering if it was 1 and a half cups or 2 and a half. You put two cups and a half, I mean they’re cookies the sweeter the better right? No girls, that’s not how it works.

Step 3. Put the flour, cream of tartar, baking soda, and a pinch of salt.

“Did you know that when you concentrate you poke your tongue a little bit out of your mouth?” You asked Robin while she was sifting the flour in the bowl trying not to spill anything of the white powder. Her tongue poking a little bit while she frowned slightly at the sight of the flour starting to cover the table because of her very bad pulse. “I didn’t realize but thank you Y/N”

 “I think you look really beautiful when you do that” Then you reached her to give her a little peck on the lips that managed to become a soft kiss that made a quarter of the flour end up on the floor and the counter.

Step 4. Roll your balls of dough in the mixture of cinnamon and sugar.

This step was actually really easy and you guys managed to go through it without any complications. Well if you count that you rolled your already tooth rotting sweet dough in more sugar a complication then you might have a complication.

Step 5. Bake for 8 to 10 minutes.

Remember when the oven needed to be preheated and none of you cared to do it? Well you put your cookies in the cold oven, turned it on and set your timer.

“Oh god no” Mess, the kitchen was a mess, it looked like a freaking war zone actually. Everything was covered in flour, sugar and cinnamon, there were a million bowls and cups on the counter, some of them you didn’t even remember why they were out but they were.

“Well shit” Robin turned to look at you but not taking her eyes completely out of the mess. You grabbed her hand pulling her closer to you putting an arm over her shoulders and leaning your head in her shoulder, she turned to look at you completely this time giving you a little kiss on the forehead “Well princess I think we have a little mess to clean” she said with a sarcastic tone in her voice.

You guys spend the next 35 minutes cleaning the disaster (well maybe making out for ten minutes of that time but who’s counting?) completely forgetting the cookies in the oven. The smell of burnt dough coming out of the oven was a slight warning that something might be wrong.

“Fuck the cookies!” You practically yelled running to grab a kitchen glove and getting the tray out of the oven. They were a little burned but your lack of preheating saved the day by not making the oven hot enough to burn the cookies to the ground. 

Having a girlfriend like Robin Buckley was fun but sometimes very weird. She was very good at some things but cooking was not on the list of those things. Your cookies ended up being super sweet, burnt and a little bit watery for the lack of flour in them but seeing Robin smile and laugh at your face when you tried them was always the best part of your day.

Requests are: open!

Masterlist

#stranger things #robin buckley x fem!reader #robin buckley fluff #robin buckley fic #robin buckley #robin buckley x female reader #robin buckley x reader #robin stranger things #robin buckley x y/n #robin buckley x you #boobabietch #lesbian #wlw post #wlw #i love this woman #boowrites★

[helloalycia]

hi! just wanted to pop in quickly to tell you that i've finally gotten around to reading both of your alicia clark books! i remember starting the first one a long time ago but never managing to finish it - i reckon it's because i've never actually watched fear the walking dead because, well, i ✨fear✨ the walking dead (sorry for the pun lol but no seriously, i'm too scared to watch such shows, even though alycia's in it 😭) but i always manage to come back to ur account and ur fics (i basically grew up with them) and i'd seen that you'd posted new content about alicia clark, so i just had to give your books another try and i absolutely loved it. i loved alicia & kamille, i loved mía and al and oliver and so many other characters and it really broke my heart when joanie and madison and adam died.

kamille is an amazing character; she is patient and calculated, fearless but also scared. she is hope and warmth and the future alicia always deserved.

i'm not religious by any means, but you still managed to make me understand and respect the hope people gain from having faith in something/someone but also the boundaries and doubts that come along with it (even though you didn't mean for it to take over the story). believing in something also often comes with rules, so it was very interesting for me to read about kamille's inner conflict about breaking them: did they really matter in a world where law and order was gone and safety and trust was always only temporary? and even if the world didn't turn to shit, kamille is a muslim lesbian and a woman of color - as i've said, i'm not religious, but i'm also a queer woman of color and i did grow up in a househould with certain beliefs, so if you don't mind and feel comfortable sharing it, i'd love to hear more about your opinion/thoughts on this matter. only if that's okay with you though, you can skip this part, if you don't want to answer that question of course! i don't wanna pressure you into anything!

but yeah, i really did love kamille (even though she was so fucking stupid and oblivious sometimes 😭). and as i've already said: i've never watched ftwd before but kamille and alicia just somehow made sense to me. i haven't felt this single in a loong time hahahaha 🥲

i believe the ftwd fandom is not very huge and i know that some of your other fics for other fandoms might get more attention, but i really do appreciate it every single time u post a fic about alicia (i mean i appreciate every fic you post but i'm kinda loving alicia clark very much right now).

just wanted to let you know that bc she seems to be one of your favorite characters and you must like writing fics about her. so yeah, if you ever feel like those fics are not being recognized properly; i recognize them. and i very much appreciate them. 🫶🏻

sorry this message is wayyy longer than i intended it to be haha

firstly can i just say there’s so much to unpack with this but first and foremost, this brought tears to my eyes because it’s such a genuinely sweet and thoughtful message, and it means a lot when someone really delves into what i’ve written and appreciates it as more than fanfiction, so thank you 😭

okay so i love your fear the walking dead pun, really made me laugh 😂 i really appreciate you giving my fics another go as well, especially as someone who doesn’t usually go for scary stuff like that – it means a lot! ♥️

you’re right about the ftwd fandom being tiny haha, it’s a struggle writing stuff when not many engage with it, but thank you so much for letting me know you enjoy my stuff! i think i’ve been writing a lot for Alicia lately because i genuinely just miss her character and there’s a lot to work with in that universe and with her, plus i’m still having withdrawal from the kamille x alicia fic as it was so fun to write and i miss them 😂 you’re right btw - kamille was a dumbass haha but her and alicia felt so real to me and i genuinely forget she’s not in the actual show 😂

again, very grateful you recognise that though – it’s always so touching to know there’s someone out there delving into what i’ve written! as you said about the subtle commentary within the fic about religion and beliefs combatting a world where it isn’t ’needed’ anymore, that was something that i’m glad you picked up on! i feel like i try to include subtleties in my writing on similar more serious themes, rather than just a fic or imagine, so it means a lot someone noticed them :)

in terms of my opinion on the whole queer women of colour and belief system, i’m happy to share! honestly writing the kamille x alicia fics were a little outlet for me as i’m in a similar boat, a pakistani lesbian, and i genuinely face this issue every day, so obviously i can only share my opinion.

as a person of colour yourself, you must understand how it is being viewed in the lgbtq+ community as someone who isn’t white, but i feel like it’s even harder when you’re a follower of a religion, so in my case Islam. But i won’t go into how it is being viewed like this externally because you can see that anywhere. For me, it’s the internal conflict.

i think knowing that i like women and can never feel otherwise makes it hard because it’s always a decision between do i force myself to think and feel differently because of my family? or do i lead my life how i want to? but then that in itself is hard because even though i’ve told myself i’m a lesbian and accepted that, have i really? i don’t share it to anyone other than my friend and sisters. I don’t know how to. And then my religion and beliefs come into play - i genuinely believe God/Allah wouldn’t frown on me for feeling this way because He created me, but other Muslims would see it as a sin and me straying away from religion. But is it really straying if it’s not my choice? Surely my beliefs should be between me and God, not everyone else?

No matter what, believing in something bigger than me and the fundamentals of my religion make me feel calm and centred. I don’t care how many times people say being gay and Muslim is wrong, because it’s not to me. I can be both. And it doesn’t change any of what i believe. Saying that though, my parents put religion first even though they’re not very religious. Family is second to them whereas it’s first for me. Their beliefs shape them and i can’t exist within that if it doesn’t follow their ideals.

It genuinely comes down to perspective, and as much as i tell myself i don’t care what others think, i do. Mostly my parents. If they knew, they’d despise me. And it’s that thought of do i lie forever to keep them in my life? or live my truth? the answer is, i don’t know. My biggest fear is being alone, funnily enough like Kamille, so i don’t know if i’d rather live an unhappy life surrounded by people or a happy life alone.

But yeah - that’s just the base points of my thoughts on the topic, as well as my experience. If you have any more questions or want me to clarify anything, do let me know! the truth is, most of the stuff Kamille fears or worries is a mirror of my life lol. Only difference is, her circumstances don’t make her choose because it’s not a choice, it just is.

Hope that helps and once again, thank you for your kind words! 🥰♥️

#asks #fear the walking dead

[goddesswitchmother]

More thoughts for the ikevamp fanfiction! Enjoy or not, I don't care. I'm doing this for me, and if others happen to enjoy as well, then that's a bonus. Yeah, I'm saying this more for myself than anything as I'm a recovering people pleaser. Sometimes, I just need to remind myself to have fun be myself and not worry about what others think of me .

Desperation pt 3

I hate him. I fucking hate him. But perhaps I shouldn't have slapped his stupid face. My hand 😭. "Theodorus Van Gogh, I fucking hate you. I've known you all of four days and I already hate you. I've never, and I mean NEVER, hated someone before. You haven't once even tried to get to know me. You've done nothing but judge me, insult me, bully me, and have make all sorts of assumptions about my character and yet you don't know the first thing about me. I don't know how you call yourself an Art Dealer because you have proven countless times already you don't have what it takes. You're a piece of shit and I hope you prove me wrong because I really don't like hatred and I don't think it's merely because it's a foreign feeling." I rant angrily as he just gawks at me with that stupid look on his face.

"Also, you'd have to be simultaneously deaf, blind, and stupid to confuse you for Vincent. You are absolutely nothing alike whatsoever, and if I didn't already know better, I would never guess you were related. Vincent, I'm sorry you had to see me like this. I really valued your friendship, and I have no intention of dating you. However, I understand if you no longer want to be friends." I added this time in tears. Fuck I'm so embarrassed. So I did what I do best, and I ran. A part of me was aware that I had an audience. I vaguely noticed just about everyone had ended up in the gardens, probably drawn in by my outburst. The only ones not there were Isaac, Napoleon, Mozart, Leonardo, and Sebastian. I made it to my room uninterrupted and threw myself into bed to bawl my eyes out. I feel so pathetic.

Once I had managed to stop crying, I mindlessly sought out one of the few comforts I managed to bring with me. I set up my watercolor book on the desk with my watercolor paints, several brushes, and the untouched glass of water from the nightstand. As an afterthought, I grabbed my mixed media book, my colored pencils, and markers just in case.

I don't know how long I spent tearing pages out and throwing them on the floor. All of them bearing finished paintings or drawings that I just didn't like. Any works left on the desk were unfinished concepts that I couldn't put together. However, I was interrupted by a knock on the door. And then the door was opened. I didn't bother checking to see who it was. "You haven't even touched your dinner. I hope you aren't planning on skipping breakfast, too. We can't have that." I was shocked back into reality then. "What?! But I only just ate breakfast a few hours ago." I really started looking around then. Sebastian quickly approached me and tilted my head up to look at him. "Uh...." I was unsure what I wanted to say. Whatever it was could wait, though. The way Sebastian was intensely studying me with concern overwhelmingly obvious in his gaze. I never had anyone worry so much about me before that it rendered me speechless. I suddenly felt the urge to cry that I violently squashed it down, hoping he didn't notice. He cleared his throat and glanced around at the mess I created. "You just might be as bad as Leonardo at losing track of time. Just yesterday, I brought you lunch, but you were crying. I don't know if you remember, but you refused lunch. You promised you'd eat dinner if I brought it to you. However." He explained, gesturing to the platter of dinner sitting neglected on the tray near the bed. I blushed as I vaguely remembered something like that. "I'm sorry. Let me clean up this mess, and I'll eat breakfast out there so you can be certain I eat." I offer hastily getting up. "Oh, I'll pick these up, if you don't mind. Just go wash up and perhaps change your attire, and I'll have your place at the dining table set." He offered, already carefully stacking the papers from the floor neatly into his arms. Damn he works quickly and efficiently. I make a noise of agreement and grab a random outfit before rushing to my bathroom.

(images sourced from pinterest)

I had quickly washed my face and brushed my hair and teeth and applied deodorant. You know the usual. But the whole time I was disturbed by how pale I was as well as the shadows around my red rimmed eyes. When I finished dressing I went to grab my makeup to see Sebastian had the same idea. "Hope you don't mind, I just thought that you were looking a little pale and sleep deprived." I just smiled gratefully. "You're a life saver." I say as I rush off to do my makeup.

(Images sourced from pinterest)

(My eyes are actually amber, though, so imagine that.)

I managed to improve my mood and started feeling my self-confidence boost by the time I made it to the dining room. Sure enough, Sebastian was just setting down my plate stacked high with the French toast and sausage I requested. A glass of hopefully cranberry apple juice joining them. "Ooh, looks delicious, thank you, Sebby." I say happily. I see his back straighten up. "Sebby, huh? Do I get a nickname, luv? Also, you look absolutely ravishing. Are you -" "Yeah, yeah, Arty-boy, I'm not wearing sweats today, so I'm definitely trying to seduce you." I interrupt, voice heavily dripping with sarcasm. "So hard to believe a woman can dress up for her own happiness." I mutter, stabbing a sausage onto my fork. Out of my peripheral, I see theo opening his mouth like he's about to say something. "Now shut up. I'm hungry." I add not to anyone in specific.

#cybird ikemen #ikevamp #ikevamp arthur #ikevamp leonardo #ikevamp theodorus #ikevamp vincent #ikevamp sebastian #ikevamp fanfic

[palaceofpassion]

Alrighty!  Time to get some hate!  Also, keep in mind these are my opinions.  You’re free to like, and feel however you want about whatever you want.  

Buuuut, time for some Temple Manga/Manhwa opinions.

Bleach and Naruto are both good at the start, however, they both suffer as the series goes on.  Kubo made it rather apparent that he didn’t even want to continue, this is a series that benefited from the color and action design from the anime as the manga itself is droll.  Everything is just a black ink blot, and he doesn’t do backgrounds.  Also he has the problem of same face.  It’s not good.  

Naruto I feel is better, but it’s still not a good series.  I will give Kishi that he’s a good artist though!  His backgrounds were very nice.  I was able to stomach through the end of both of these.  Alright story wise, but kind of meh feel wise.

In comparison O-parts Hunter or 666 Satan, did the Naruto thing but better.  It was done by his brother.  It didn’t feel drawn on, but the battles were fun and the story actually pretty sad.  You can most def see the inspiration from Naruto though.

Dragon Ball, oh god, the anime drags on way too much.  But the manga is a great read.  I think it’s a fun series, but it’s not great story wise.  

Hunter X Hunter is held back by the mangaka hard.  I know that he’s sickly, but there’s also the parts where he just doesn’t want to work most of the time.  Which ya know, fair.  It’s possible he doesn’t know what he wants to do with the series anymore, as it’s basically Hiatus x Hiatus.  Unfortunately, the Chimera Arc isn’t great, it takes a way a lto of the creativity that Nen had earlier and just goes into full on battle Arc.  It doesn’t help that the manga art turns into literal sketches at this point.

One Piece, I fucking LOVE One Piece, but it’s long.  And you have to be ready.  It can be a bit of a slow start up, however, Buggy had already drawn my interest from the start.  I do think people over hype how much oda has planned.  I do think he’s winging it a few times.  But it’s got a great feel to it, it’s probably one of the msot fun Manga, which I think is what it’s going for.  Battles, especially early in the time skip, are hard to read.  But what happens in them is amazing.  Also, I’d rather not talk about the anime, I’ll look up clips when I want to see things animated.  It’s just... episodes are drawn out way to damn long!  At least the filler is fun compared to Naruto’s.  Also Backgrounds 10/10 Oda.  This is on my to re=read list.

MHA, I enjoy it, but it hasn’t been enough to keep my attention.  I think it’s a good story, yet somehow, I was able to finish Bleach and Naruto, yet I don’t have the attention span for this series for whatever reason.  I’ll sometimes come back to it, so again, yeah not sure what’s the deal with that.  

Berserk is really good, I’m sad about the hiatus and what happened to Miura.  But his friend, the man who did Holy Land, I recommend Holy Land by the way, will be continuing it.  Though, their art styles are incredibly different so I imagine this is going to go vastly different.  One of the things I really enjoy, at least for what it was becoming, is something I enjoy about the more Recent god of War.  Someone who was ravaged by nothing but revenge, finally finding peace in themselves.

Komi Can’t Communicate, It’s cute as fuck.  But it peaked at the second year class.  Year 1 was super annoying, I hate Yamai.  That’s all.

Volcanic Age, this is a Murim styled martial arts Manhwa, so be warned.  It’s better than most!  Like, a lot better, the main character is reasonable, he doesn’t try to be the big bad man and tries to make everyone his enemy.  His knowledge actually feels well earned, compared to most of this type where they’re just gary stus.  Over all a good fun read.

Kingdom:  Fuuuuck, this manga is an emotional ride.  I don’t want to spoil it, but it’s historical fiction.  I enjoy this type of series, ancient warfare, as i was a huge fan of Romance of the Three Kingdoms growing up.  I still have the novels!  I suggest giving it a read, it’s really good.

Mashle, this is the over powered MC kind, but unlike One Punch Man, it doesn’t just remove the main character until plot demands it.  It’s about him, because it’s more than just a gag that became popular and now doesn’t know what to do with itself.  It give sthe main character to learn more about things, be more than just himself.  And he’s just a damned good person, if not a bit...k well weird.

Helck and Verndio, these are togther because one is a sequel to the other, and the effects of helck are slowly leaking it.  It’s pretty godlike.  Probably one of my favorites of all time.  Really wonderfully done, and it doesn’t last for very long.  Helck is a, OP main character, but it’s a riveting story!  You get to learn more about their world, and actually how terrifying it is.  In the end, being a single lone powerful figure just isn’t enough.  I really recommend these two.

Solo Leveling, it’s cool.  Like, it has that power fantasy down pat way more than The Gamer.  I’ll give it that for sure.  If you’ve read fics you’ve read The Gamer ones, the Gamer itself isn’t great... by any means.  Solo Leveling is definitely better, but at the same time it falls into the same problem of not being great story wise.  If you’re just in it for fantastic fucking art, and great fights though, this is really good.

On the note of Gamer style though.  Infinite Leveling: Murim.  Another Murim styled, but with stats and leveling for the main character.  This is done well, like fantastically well.  The leveling system is harsh he doesn’t just gain stats after stats, and they’re kept within the people of the world he’s with.  Those around him are truely superior, and the stats feel more like a natural progression of hard work he’s doing to train.  Unlike msot of the Gamer styled manga/manhwa, this one feels like he has to truly work for it, from excercising to training.

Worn and Torn Newbie, this is a game Manhwa, but the main character is fun and such a damn bastard.  You just can’t help but love him.  This series has really good art, and it’s a fun read if you want to just see how things go.  I suggest this one as well.

Return of the lEgendary Spear Knight, Another Manhwa, this is a breath of fresh air!  This one is one of those rare instances where people straight up change when they’re shown the error of their ways.  The world is shown to not be black and white, and characters who appear to be bastards can actually become better people due to the difference of environment.

The Lazy Prince Becomes a Genius.  The title is misleading, but this Manhwa is really damn good.  Probably my favorite Manhwa at the time of this post!  There are some pacing issues, but over all it’s great, and i feel like I’m losing point.

Anyways!

Mairimashita! Iruma-Kun, this will be the last one!  This is just a better RWBy style story.  If you like RWBY you’ll probably like this one way more.  The author fleshes out the characters at a much better pace, they’re all able to do things even if they aren’t combatants, and unlike RWBY, they feel like genuine friends who have good teamwork.  Story is pretty basic, but it’s elevated by the fun cast of characters who are all incredibly charming.  The main character is also just fun, he gets better and better as the series goes on.  The Rival character, so to speak, makes Bakugo eat dust for sure.

Feel free to tell me off if you want.  Just some thoughts i had when watching a Trash Tastes episode.

#Temple THoughts

[quenthel]

Fwiw, I'm excited about your Daeran and Woljif thoughts (love that dynamic your honor), the former goes out of his way to befriend outcasts and criminals cuz it pisses the other nobles off but then the friendship becomes genuine? Good shit

And like? It's a feature and not a bug that WOTR's evil party-members earn their evil alignment (for one, seems like people forgot Daeran's first reaction to the Commander is "oh, a wounded fighter dragged into the middle of the square? Isn't there a ditch you can throw them in?"). Idk, people are weird about liking evil characters

omg!! 🥺🥺 I'm flattered! I wanted to write abt Woljif and Daeran separately BUT their friendship (and both of their friendship with Ember too) is SO GOOD... like they are the only ones pretty much who stay together after the game (and Seelah visits others but they added that in the enhanced edition). MUCH to think about!! And yeah... Like w the post I made a lot of ppl simply misinterpreted what i was saying to mean I dont think lawful or good commanders can have a deep connection w evil characters while I was saying that they reveal their colors more if your MC is making those choices too (bc the character writing of the game is actually three dimensional and GOOD). Idk it was such a mess. But generally speaking the alignments make so much sense for each character in the game!! Even the neutral party members are neutral and not good for a reason!!! Its actually fun!! And on the law-chaos axis those alignments make sense too and neither being lawful or being chaotic is written in a boring way for the companions (for the MC well... sometimes i felt like it was a bit boring or written in a weird way esp chaotic options but alas).

ANYWAY I do want to play trough Woljif's quest again before i write anything bc it blew my fucking mind the first time i played it but usually during replays I skip around a lot bc I want to get to the parts I havent seen yet dfgdg but also I want to do his "bad end" too to get more of a nuanced view of what his best and worst looks like, so it might take a while... Also I'm a bit reluctant to write abt Daeran bc I don't like getting hate 😔 Also I need to look trough more of his dialogue and maybe look at his bad end too (but for him its so horrible I don't really want to). He also has a lot of hidden themes and shit to his narrative and I need to organize everything mentally...

#asks #pathfinder #Woljif is a character to me who used to be my absolute fave when i first played the game #like he clicked w me right off the bat #but then i played trough the daeran romance and then much later picked wendu over lann bc i wanted to see what shes about and ye... #still Woljif remains my right hand arm man...

[electricbluebutterflies]

“we’re assigned to this mission in which we have to pretend to be a married couple, but i’m actually really in love with you”

Or, corporate spies on a cruise / how many romcom tropes can I fit into almost 6k. Jessica/Leto, PG-iiiiish (there's very vague Implications), also on ao3.

She’s done worse. She can’t easily remember when, which is never a good sign, but she’s done worse.

Corporate espionage is a weird career, and Jessica is occasionally convinced that some higher-up at the agency inexplicably hates her. On paper, she’s a great asset; in person, a mundane-pretty thirtysomething white woman is as forgettable as it gets. She doesn’t get the exciting assignments, fine, but she’s talented at fading into the background and seeing what isn’t seen and that should be enough and-

The moment she sees the phrase “cruise ship”, she deeply considers quitting on the spot. Then she sees the payout. She’s done worse and it paid less than this. She can survive ten days observing every service-oriented flaw on a floating wedding cake in the Caribbean. How bad could it actually be?

Answer – it’s a partnered assignment, and she does not get to choose who the agency sends with her. Oh, and they’re supposed to be playing newlyweds for some reason that Jessica has no desire to find out. Fuck her.

She finds out those details two days beforehand, and on the one hand at least her counterpart is someone she’s dealt with in passing but on the other hand… yeah, something on high definitely hates her, this is proof. She knows him more by reputation than personality, but supposedly that’s charming enough, and the man is very easy to look at, and-

Newlyweds. On a cruise. For ten very, very long days. With someone she has… not exactly a crush on, but only because she doesn’t do crushes or anything else in the normal spectrum of human emotional attachments. Someone she wants, maybe? Someone she won’t mind having to play couple with?

She’s going to die. She’s going to experience multiple emotions at once and fall over the edge of the ship into the perfect blue embrace of the Atlantic. She’s convinced.

Technically, the fun begins on dry land, in a questionable airport hotel somewhere in Florida – Jessica has learned to blur every detail she can in her mind, and specific locations don’t matter anyways – where everything she will need for the assignment is waiting for her. Too many revealing swimsuits in too many bright colors, and she half wonders if the implication is she’s supposed to be playing trophy wife and honestly she doesn’t have the right curves for that and-

She hears the click of the door unlocking and turns to look, hands still full of oh she is absolutely going to kill whomever thinks she looks decent in bubblegum pink as soon as she figures out who they are, and she can’t help that her heart skips half a beat. This sort of paired assignment, she reminds herself, will be easier with someone she can stand. She can fake affection if she’s not actually faking that much. She can-

“Oh thank goodness,” he says, taking her in. “At least you’re competent.”

She knows him more by reputation than personality, and the paperwork looks perfect. A few years older than her but not enough that it matters, not as much of a shapeshifter as she is but compensates more than enough by supposedly being able to talk his way out of almost anything, the kind of past-assignment pedigree that justifies their profession. Likable, she’s always heard. Polite enough, the few times they’ve interacted before. Not someone she’s scared to be alone with for the better part of two weeks. Not-

“I’m surprised that’s the word you start with.” Her own reputation, she knows, is… less shiny. She’s capable enough, and out of that she has become proud, but no one would ever mistake her icy tendencies for anything like charm, and-

“Did you consider why the payout looked unusually high?”

“I’m here. Of course I considered it.”

“Sometimes a contract comes along they can’t really say no to…”

“And usually those are the contracts that get me stuck somewhere unpleasant for multiple months,” Jessica finishes. “Not this. Not a paid vacation.”

“Paid vacation where they fully expect one of us will get food poisoning at the very least,” her counterpart corrects. “They want lawsuit bait, not trade secrets.”

“So the plan is… what, be the most obnoxious customers this cruise line has ever seen?”

“I was thinking opposite. Be normal. Be as absolutely normal as possible and don’t get any damage control run on us.”

She likes him, dammit. There is something in her that wants to defer, to not overthink this, to enjoy not being on her own on an assignment where she’ll probably burn like a lobster and-

“Plot detail seems unnecessary,” she says after a comfortable silence.

“Means we stick together and have the same experience. If something goes wrong, we both see it.”

Sounds plausible enough, but doesn’t mean she has to like it. She can be calm, she can do anything in public with enough determination to make it look real, but she doesn’t… she doesn’t…

Under such circumstances, admitting her lack of baselines does not seem like a good idea. All of the things she’s never done for her own purposes, never thought about herself that way, never seemed safe enough, never-

Something in her emotional state must slip through her careful externals, she realizes as her counterpart moves closer. There’s something warm about him, she thinks, something anyone could fall in love with and she could, she doesn’t know whether she wants to but she could, she could-

“This is only as awkward as we make it,” he says like the decision has already been made, close enough to touch her but he doesn’t. “As long as we hold hands in public…”

“You do see this, right?” She lifts up a scrap of pink floral bikini, an abomination that will find its way onto her body in the next few days even as she currently hates every detail. “There’s a set mood here. It isn’t exactly…”

“It’s not that bad.”

Jessica laughs, and at least this man won’t intentionally be the cause of her problems. “More revealing than I would’ve picked. A lot more revealing than I would’ve picked.”

“Oh. That kind of problem.”

“I’ll deal, but-“

“They don’t expect outfit reports.”

“The whole suitcase is in that vein. I’m sure most women would be okay with it, but I’m…”

Personal rule number whatever – she does not discuss her background with anyone. Ever. Especially not someone she wants to like her, on the rare occasions that happens. It just… doesn’t end well, and she can’t risk that right now, she can’t-

Instead of some attempt at a reassuring comment, he moves away and goes through the other suitcase. She turns her head to watch, and she’s almost jealous – more muted colors, practical, probably all comfortable. Less visual expectations, and she wants to say something cruel about it but instead she bites her lip hard enough to taste blood, instead-

“Here.”

An outstretched hand, a dove-gray tshirt, the smallest possible peace offering and her heart melts.

“Thank you.”

“It’ll help us be convincing if you wear something that looks like mine. Safe way around…”

“I’m sorry I’m not-“

“Don’t overthink this. Whatever happens, don’t overthink this.”

* * * * *

At least the hotel room has two beds. Not that Jessica sleeps well – she’s too adapted to privacy, and being in the same space as an unknown factor is enough to cause distress. Nothing happens; in another life, she thinks, that man would make a perfectly amicable roommate. Unfortunately…

In the morning, she puts on the most subtle outfit she can – not saying much, but she still tries – and an amount of lipgloss she thinks may be inappropriate on anyone old enough to rent a car, and she sticks out her hand and lets her counterpart put the unnecessarily fancy set of wedding rings on her finger.

“With this ring, I thee… are there specific vows for a temporary situation?”

“None I’ve ever heard,” she replies. “There ought to be. A different wedding ceremony for couples no one thinks will work out. Or marriages of convenience. Or…”

 “Can’t say I see myself as the marrying type. This may be as close as I get.”

There’s a sadness in his voice, a moment of broken eye contact, a sense of self-doubt Jessica recognizes like a mirror and she thinks in that moment that she would do anything in the world to take that pain but this is no time for her own emotions. Instead a soft smile, instead-

“What, you can’t imagine bringing someone else into this life?”

“Would you?”

She’s speechless for a moment, wants to come up with a good decoy answer, can’t. “Never even considered it.”

“Or after, maybe? None of us stay forever…”

Is he flirting with her? She’s pretty sure yes, and that’s just a nest of problems, and-

“Haven’t found a good enough reason,” she says, hoping that sounds like the end of the conversation. “Not sure whether I ever will.”

They’re quiet as the day truly begins, quiet as they shift into roles and become invisible. The rule with such assignments is to keep backstory minimal and easy, and the proximity of the assigned dynamic means no reason to discuss it. They’ll figure it out as needed, which she’s pretty sure already means her partner will say something and she’ll just go with it, she wouldn’t be surprised if he’s decided every detail of their fake life and honestly she has no problem with not thinking about it and-

This kind of trust-fall could be a mistake, she knows, but she can’t imagine anyone who’s been with their agency that long is anything worth fearing. Especially someone who’s openly side-eyeing the whole situation they’re currently in. Especially someone who gives her a look that feels like nonverbally asking for permission before he takes her hand.

She decides, in the blur of boarding and trying to hold back the instincts that want to find the weaknesses of every other cruise passenger she sees, that she’ll lean into her natural personality a little more than she suspects anyone wants her to. Be quiet in public and save all her comments for the safety of closed doors. Pass it off as just overwhelmed if anyone has concerns, and that’s accurate enough, and-

“You okay?” he asks, quiet tone and crowded space giving opportunity for openness.

“We’ll talk later.”

“Anything I need to know?”

“No. Just internals.”

“Doesn’t automatically mean-“

“You don’t need to worry about me,” she says, and it comes out harsher than she wants but she doesn’t care. “Not… not like it’s real.”

“And if it is?”

“That’s more of a problem than anything I have going on.”

This is no place for such a conversation, and they both hold back until they reach their room, which is… on the smaller side for a higher-end cruise ship, Jessica guesses, and probably on the cheaper end too. One bed that she has some doubts will accommodate both of their bodies comfortably. An equally small bathroom. Maybe designed this way to force its temporary occupants out into all the activities their vacation provides, but-

“I’ll take the floor,” she says before this too can turn into anything. “Or… that chair doesn’t look too bad to curl up in, I’ll be fine, I-“

Her counterpart gives her an unimpressed look, still a warmth to it that she can’t quite pin, but… he’s trying to be decent to her, she suspects, and she’s not making that easy for him. “You’re not sleeping on the damn floor.”

“Give me one good reason not to.”

“Several. It wouldn’t be comfortable. You didn’t sleep for more than half an hour straight last night and don’t pretend that’s not what happened. I’m not sure why you’re scared of me but-“

“Scared?” she repeats with full venom. “That’s how you’re interpreting this?!”

“Either scared or repressed. Nothing else is really-”

“Option two.”

He’s quiet for what feels like a few moments too long, just out of reach in this space that makes her feel small and trapped, and this is why she offered to keep what distance she can, this is why-

“Still? After… what was it, seven years in?”

“Seduction is different from the mundane. I can compartmentalize screwing someone I can’t stand. Not so much…”

He’s decent-looking and treats her like a human being and that’s a combination of problems she doesn’t need, she’d say if she were stronger. He’s distracting. At the same time, this may be as close to normal as she ever gets and-

“I’m quitting after this,” he says after another awkward silence. “They know already. You won’t have to deal with me again. Just get through the next ten days and forget this ever happened. Whatever you have to do. But you are not sleeping on that floor.”

“I don’t suppose you’re offering?”

“We’re both functional adults. I won’t try anything.”

She decides, against her better judgment, against a lifetime of cultivated paranoia and the fear of her own human heart, to believe him.

* * * * *

First, dinner. First, the realization that they will spend most meals with three other couples, none of whom are particularly interesting as far as Jessica is concerned. She turns her mind off, nods and affirms as it feels right, doesn’t totally process what backstory she’s agreeing to and doesn’t particularly care. It doesn’t matter. Ten more days, and then-

What if this is the motivation she needs to get out too? She’s been thinking about it for a while, what a quieter life might look like, and maybe…

No. Modern women do not quit their stable jobs due to what is quickly turning into unrequited love for someone they have no chance with in the outside world. That’s a reckless idea. She’s half tempted to do it anyway.

They get through dinner and a safety demonstration and then her counterpart suggests they take a walk to explore, to get a better sense of wherever the lawsuit bait they might be looking for may be. She feels herself losing focus and still goes with it, and as time passes she clings more and it feels safe and-

Eventually she realizes she’s crossed the line from tired to outright useless, and she isn’t sure how to say that, isn’t sure-

Dammit, this is why she doesn’t do paired assignments. Vulnerability is a curse.

It’s a few more minutes before her partner realizes something is actually wrong, and even that is subtle and respectful. “We should go back,” he says even though there’s still so much to see and this is still an ideal opportunity. “Long day.”

“I’m fine,” she says instinctively.

“You’re not fine.”

Under almost any other circumstances she’d push back, but… there is something frightfully enjoyable about being taken care of, a sense that her current weakness does not change how she is seen. She is a complication, perhaps, but not undesired. Maybe neither of them is what the other thinks. Maybe…

They’re quiet until they get back to the room, and there’s already a comfort in the silence, a sense that they are well-paired. That’s a start, she thinks, that’s enough of a reason to try to pursue this as any, that’s-

No. Terrible idea. There’s no justifiable reason to escalate beyond the boundaries of the mission. Even that may be too much.

Their superiors didn’t even think to give her normal pajamas. She’s known that for a day now, but it’s different without options, in an enclosed space where it takes too much effort not to blush and if these tiny impractical things are what normal newly-married women wear there may be valid reasons to stay single and-

“That’ll leave marks,” her counterpart says, glancing over her shoulder.

“That may be the point. And this is the most… I hate them. I hate them so much.”

“You don’t have to tolerate…”

“Don’t offer me a future. Don’t say things you won’t mean on dry land.”

“Did I do something to you?”

She’s quiet for what feels like too long, unable to make eye contact, hard enough to keep herself from crying. “No. You’re not the problem.”

“That’s not how you’re acting.”

“It’s not… you’re not… you don’t need to try with me. I don’t expect much and you’re-“

“You really are as fucked-up as I heard.”

Well, now she’s even more confused. She knows the rumors about her – it’s hard not to, she’s private even by the standards of their line of work, she’s perfect but her people skills aren’t where they could be in what passes for her outside life – but that way of putting it is new and it hurts and-

“Does that change anything?”

“Do you think it should?”

No, she wants to say. She wants to drown in the first real thing she’s ever felt, she wants to turn her body and take the first set of kisses she’s actively wanted, she wants to do a lot of impulsive things and she is goddamn terrified that none of them will end well and-

“What I want doesn’t matter,” she says instead, trying to make herself calm.

“Then no. It doesn’t change anything. You are… fascinating. And you haven’t done anything to me yet.”

“Living up to my ice-bitch reputation for a whole day doesn’t count?”

“Doesn’t feel personal.”

* * * * *

They fall asleep separate and wake up entwined. Her eyes open first, and it takes a few moments to process that there’s an arm innocently wrapped around her waist and a few moments more to decide she’s perfectly comfortable. The space is small, she justifies. The space is small enough to cause behaviors that would be unacceptable otherwise. This doesn’t have to mean anything.

She’s comfortable, and there is nothing imminent that needs done, and she is perfectly content to lie there for time without end and be held and claim this little moment for her future daydreams. None of this will happen again; after this mission is over, she decides, she will politely quit the agency and go find some boring office job somewhere and… this here will be the closest she ever comes to romance, and that will be fine by her. Better to deny herself than to want anything so risky. Better to-

Positions change as her counterpart wakes up – she can’t see him from her current angle, his body wrapped around hers, but he too seems to have no desire to move. Already this is more than it needs to be, already-

“Did you at least sleep?”

She could fall for him, she thinks. She could so easily convince herself that this is real. She shouldn’t, but she wants. She could adapt herself afterwards and make it real. She could-

“I did. I… it’s been a long time since I’ve been close to anyone like this.”

“Alright.”

There is still more exploring to do today, but a decision is made to people-watch for a while, to enjoy their circumstances. Somehow this ends up on a pool deck, Jessica in one of the godawful swimsuits and-

“Could you do my back?”

So help her, she’s not getting a sunburn on the first full day, she’s not-

She rarely has reason to remember how touch-averse she is, but it takes effort to stay calm, lying on a deck chair with almost all of her skin exposed and unfamiliar hands trying to cover her in sunscreen. She’s not sure that amount of pressure is necessary, she’s not-

“What are you doing?”

“Has anyone ever pointed out how tense you are?”

“Not while touching me.”

“Just say something if I hurt you, okay?”

She has no intention to escalate, but if her counterpart decides to then who is she to say no. His fingertips feel right, trying to take her tension, take everything maybe, trying to-

“Is this normal?” she asks, barely more than a whisper.

“Maybe?”

“You don’t know either,” she interprets, thankful her current position hides her blush.

“Haven’t exactly gotten as far as a couples’ vacation before.”

“Do I get to be surprised?”

“Lack of interest sound like enough of an explanation?”

“And here I suspected you were a romantic.”

“Idealistic, not…” His hands pause on her lower back, and already it’s easier for them to have the deep conversations without eye contact. “Dreams and reality don’t always match.”

“Never found the right person,” she interprets.

“Exactly.”

The silence becomes comfortable again, the care that makes her melt, the annoying curiosity about whether she might not be the only one having an internal crisis. She won’t move first, she decides. She absolutely will not move first. She’ll just… allow whatever happens. Whatever it is. Wherever it goes.

* * * * *

From there the mission fades into a pleasant routine. Jessica accepts that her intended role is to be a visual distraction, and it’s nice to not think for a few days, to merely confirm what her partner sees. If this is in fact how her career ends, this is a nice bow to put on it. If this is how her career ends…

The idea becomes more tempting as a few days pass, as she starts for the first time in close to a decade to think about what she might actually want. She’d fallen into observation work the same way she’d fallen into working night shift at a hotel before that, a combination of desperation and something about her that reads as impossible to take advantage of, and before that…

As far as her personal mythology goes, she came out of the ground at nineteen with a variety pack of trauma scars. The fifteen years since have been decent enough to her, and she is not healed but she is at least functional and that’s more than anyone in her situation ever hopes for, and-

Those hauntings hit hard on the morning of the sixth day, midway through what she’s decided is going to be an unnecessarily long shower. Mornings on a cruise ship are decidedly boring, even more so without a port today, and she needs to kill time, and her mind won’t stop, and-

She’s distracted. That’s what she’ll say later. She’s distracted, and she turns the water off and opens the door and reaches for a towel and grabs the rack instead and… towel racks, it turns out, are not designed to support a significant amount of her weight. She’s distracted, and she falls, taking the cheap metal off the wall with her, and-

They were sent to find lawsuit bait, she thinks as she processes her minor injuries, and they have found it. She’s lucky, she supposes, just a cut on her hand, maybe another on her shoulder, maybe-

The door opens, and okay now she can die.

“Shit.”

Jessica turns her head and it hurts, like she pulled something on the way down, like she’s going to spend the rest of the trip cocooned in bed. “Yeah.”

Her partner just stands there for a few moments, processing the situation, processing the state of her and for once she doesn’t feel the need to say anything about how visibly worried he is. At least this time it makes sense. At least this time she actually is justifiably distressed. This time…

“Are you…”

“Help?”

This is a different kind of vulnerable, her body curled up in a defense position but all her details still exposed. She is used to being seen, on the rare occasions she has been, with colder eyes. Not this, not this man who isn’t sure where he’s allowed to look as he kneels down next to her, not-

“Anything feel broken?”

“No. Not… not that bad. I’ll be alright. I’m just… not sure about moving right now.”

The towel she’d been aiming for is currently underneath her body; he reaches for another and tries to get it around her without doing anything improper, a caution she doubts right now is the right moment to point out. “Can you move?”

“I think so? Help me up?”

She has been too weak too many times on this assignment, she thinks, but at least this time she can justify. At least this time, one hand keeping a towel around her torso and an awareness how many bruises are forming on her pale skin… anyone would do the same. She is not weak, she tells herself. Unfortunate, perhaps, but not weak.

She feels steady enough on her feet, and her eyes flit to the mirror in front of her, how visible her current state of distress. She ought to push her partner’s hand away and she doesn’t; she ought to ask for privacy and she can’t. For right now, for this perfect fragile moment, she can forget everything.

Disaster averted, the energy shifts and his worry becomes something like visible relief. She’s noticed how quickly his moods change, a more visible adaptability than her own, something powerful and fascinating to it, something-

“I… I heard a crash without a scream and I thought-“

“I run quiet,” she murmurs. “No point in screaming if no one would help.”

“You could’ve. You knew-“

“I can’t break a lifetime of programming in a week. It’s not that easy.”

“You say things like that and I can’t help but wonder-“

“You don’t need to know. I’m out of your life in four days. I don’t need to-“

“What if I want to?”

Every instinct she has wants to say that’s a terrible idea. Fine, he’s motivated her to take a little more control of her life, that’s half a miracle and she probably owes him a kidney for it, but she doesn’t… she can’t…

“And what does that look like?” she asks, and she can’t help but wonder if she hit her head after all, if this isn’t all some unfortunate dream, if-

“I don’t know. Maybe if we’re in the same city at some point after this we see each other and…”

Jessica turns for better eye contact, better understanding of the blooming reality that she’s not the only one holding back, and damn her and her fragile heart, if this ends badly it may be the last thing she does, if this ends badly-

“That’s not what you want.”

“Does it matter? You’re not… you’re cautious and beautiful and-”

“I’m not scared of you,” she says, different weight to it than a few days ago, that reckless part of her that wants to fade into this forever, that wants too many damned things, wants-

“I could fall in love with you, I think. Outside of this. Like normal people do.”

“And if I don’t know how?”

“I don’t either. We could still try.”

He backs away before anything can happen, before either of them has space to do something impulsive. There has been enough awkwardness for one morning; there has been enough awkwardness, she thinks, for an entire lifetime. She should hate this so much, how much stronger her emotions have been this past week, how much-

No, she thinks as the door clicks closed and she steadies herself against the bathroom counter. She could never hate him. Someday that’ll be a problem, if she gets that kind of time, but right now it isn’t.

* * * * *

Their energy changes after that. It is easier to play her assigned role – not that it was particularly hard before, Jessica reminds herself lest she get too stuck in her head, but it’s always easier to play things as real as possible. If they are, in fact, falling for each other…

She does not plan to spend the second-to-last night in what passes for a particularly touristy nightclub, but there’s a dress in her suitcase that looks intended for that purpose, and she hates almost every life choice she’s ever made right now but this is if nothing else an opportunity.

Her self-perception has always favored her mind, not her body. Being considered pretty makes her prey, increases the odds of bad things happening, and she’s done everything she can to minimize the risk. Be unmemorable and be safe. To go against that for her own reasons, to actually care how she is seen…

It’s been one thing to bleed herself into her role, to curl up close at night because something about that man makes her calm like she didn’t know her mind was capable of a week ago and lean into whatever touch is offered and not just make the best of a bizarre situation but make it beautiful. It feels like another to make moves, this close to what should be the end, to make it all real.

She doesn’t like to think about herself as a physical being, but her hair is up out of the way and her eyeliner is perfect and this awful dress covers about half what she would in her own life and… she doesn’t mind what looks back at her in the mirror. Maybe this is what she needs to be.

Her counterpart takes the bait so well – she appreciates how easy he is to read, like being subtle about anything has never occurred to him, like there is never any need to hold back. She half expects a comment, but lingering glances say enough, just a little more proximity says enough, there is not-

“Do you ever do this outside?” he asks a while later, music just loud enough to let them have a conversation.

“Go dancing?” Jessica laughs, like that’s the wildest idea she’s ever heard, like in what world did he get that impression of her but she appreciates the space given all the same. “No. I don’t… I’m borderline reclusive when I’m not working. No friends, no lovers, managed to kill a cactus, that’s not supposed to be possible…”

“Do I get to be impressed by that last bit?”

“I think horror would be a more appropriate reaction. I was only gone for a week that time!”

“So you’re not the type to fill a hypothetical apartment with every plant you lay eyes on. You just keep getting more perfect.”

“What, you’re not the plant-parent type?”

“There’s a difference between having a few houseplants for decoration and a whole greenhouse…”

They’re quiet for a while and it’s a different kind of comfortable, forcing herself to be present in her body, forcing herself to be good at this and oh it is somehow both easier and harder than it should be and-

It occurs to her that this would be a good excuse to take a kiss, and she does. She doesn’t know how to initiate, but this is what she wants most in the world right now and it’s a perfect heartbeat and-

“You didn’t need to do that.”

“But did you want it too?”

He answers with a kiss in return, more deliberate, and she feels something dangerous wake up in her and… there’s no going back from this, she realizes. Someday she’s going to look back on this moment as a turning point, so small but her little life will never be the same after, and-

“We need to go somewhere quieter,” she breathes against his skin, hoping he picks up the implications.

She doesn’t do this, she reminds herself as they drift back to their room. She’s had disappointing sex on a few missions over the years, learned how to make herself adaptable and use her softness as just another tactic, but this is real, fuck, this is real and she’s terrified and-

She doesn’t do this, and she lets her mind turn off for the occasion, lets her partner lead once they’re behind a safely locked door, lets him kiss and touch her and it’s good and she wants and she’s overwhelmed and-

“You have… done things before, yeah?”

Back into her body, back into this moment, back into she’s down to really useless underwear on a bed and her partner is in similar state and looking at her like he’s not sure any of this is a good idea either and-

“Yeah. I have an implant. I’m okay.”

Her instincts already justify this as a lapse in judgment nothing more, but it feels right, familiar somehow, she’s not a romantic but she wants, she wants-

Out of her mind, into her body. Only them, only this.

After, she clings. After, she turns every detail into a safe memory. After – and this is the fear of it all – she barely sleeps and she wonders if there is any coming back from what they have done.

* * * * *

It ends. The details blur as they should, and they end up back in that hotel room where the mission started, a few hours of closure before it all ends. A liminal space, a cocoon, ending and beginning and-

It feels nice to change back into comfortable clothes, to become herself again, but she wonders if that is still enough. If these reckless hopes she has will mean anything anymore. If-

“What now?” she asks, just a little time to kill and all of her anxieties taking up the empty space.

“What do you mean?”

“Do we part amicably and forget this ever happened? Do we…”

Instead of an answer, her partner turns and writes something on hotel stationary and hands her a folded slip of paper. “Open that once you’re on your flight.”

“What is it?”

“A phone number the agency doesn’t know I keep. You’re… different. Call me, if you leave.”

“You still-“

“How could anyone spend nearly two weeks glued to you and not get attached?”

Jessica can think of a several-page list of reasons, but this doesn’t seem like the time. Not when it feels like, once again, she is being offered a new life.

“Trauma bonding is a thing,” she murmurs.

“You really don’t trust anyone.”

“Can you blame me?”

“Try. If you want. If you…”

“I want,” she says, moving closer and taking a parting kiss. “Is that okay?”

“Perfect.”

* * * * *

As instructed, she opens the paper on her second flight and sees not just a phone number with an unfamiliar area code but also a legal name that doesn’t match the one on the paperwork she saw two weeks ago.

She tells the agency she thinks she’s losing her touch and she’d rather not almost die again, but good luck with the case.

A month later, in a new city picked off that private information, Jessica makes a phone call.

“I got out.”

“Complicated?”

“I may be a peripheral witness in a few lawsuits, but… otherwise amicable.”

“What now?”

“I don’t know yet.”

He gives her an address, which later turns out to be a neutral midpoint of a hole-in-the-wall Italian restaurant, and a time.

“Start over with me.”

She wants. She does.

#ebf writes fic #leto x jessica #queue

[universereelsmarvel]

I do not like Sonic Frontiers.

I'm convinced this game was an elaborate ruse to get me to like Sonic Forces more. Sonic Frontiers actually appears as a synonym for tedious on Google.com. Collecting a bunch of random items and travelling for miles to go see a character and see the same animation a million times over, then travel even further to go see the same character again and get another cutscene is mind numbing. It isn't fun because the open world isn't at all interesting. Just a bunch of flat land, like a Unity test demo, as stated many times before. Compare this to a level in Generations for example. I see that and I think "yeah, I wanna explore that." These areas are bland and dull, and give me nothing to work with. And then you collect the Chaos Emeralds in the same predictable, monotonous pattern. It is not at all fun. It feels like a chore, just aimlessly wandering around. Part of why I like Sonic is because it's very accessible and easy to jump into. It's hard to get bored when you're going from one wildly different colorful and wacky, set piece filled level to the next. This just feels too high maintenance for my liking. I know I maybe have the gaming tastes of a 58 year old, but I digress. I am not a fan of the whole "grinding" thing and “levelling up” in a Sonic game.

Properly implemented momentum is barely in the game and feels like it was added in at the last minute. It works when it feels like it. Yes, it can be fun to air boost off of something and get air time, and skip around bigger chunks of the map. But it doesn't work in any consistent way, and often feels unintentional. You have to fight with the game to get it to work. It's not like that in something like Sonic Adventure. Sonic has no genuine, authentic sense of weight in his movements. It often feels like a Sonic 4 philosophy, or lack thereof, of physics, but only in 3D. Speaking of which, the sheer amount of 2D areas in the 3D open world is embarrassing. Sonic Team just does not believe in themselves. When I think open world 3D Sonic, I don't think of extremely basic elementary school level platforming. Or intrusive mini games. Pinball? Galaga? Koko Roundups? Why on Earth would some of this stuff be mandatory? I'm sick of games incorporating these wildly incongruent genres into their games. Puzzles don't belong in a Sonic game, at least not as something mandatory. I'm not one of those people who thinks Sonic is only about going fast, but this just does not fit the impatient, always on the move, rambunctious Sonic that this franchise is supposed to represent. 

And don't even get me started on the final boss being fucking Galaga. What the fuck. What kind of climatic final battle culminates in fucking Galaga, and then a shitty quick time event? Wow, truly the future of Sonic. We end on a re-creation of an arcade game that came out 40 years ago, that is currently available on 5 dollar plug 'n play games at a Dollar Tree near you. And the combat being extremely mindless and button-mashy is also a big negative for me.

The story is also terrible. One of the things that could've saved the barren, dull looking lands is the sense of mystery. There's an intriguing creep factor about Sonic being in this big open space that's almost vacant. Sonic being in a strange, liminal space sounds kind of cool. But the mystery ends up being not at all compelling. It's just the same shit we've seen a hundred times. An ancient civilization losing their people, losing their home, Chaos Emeralds are involved, blah blah. Also not a fan of the Chaos Emeralds having their origin explained. They are much better off just being this mysterious force that works in ways civilization doesn't even understand. And then we have Sage, who's supposed to be a big deal, and seems to have a problem with Sonic is doing. She keeps saying these cryptic things as if there's something huge we don't know about going on, but it ends up being a bunch of meaningless red herrings. She's just another invention by Eggman. And look, Eggman caring for a daughter-like figure is compelling. But this comes out of nowhere close to the end of the game, this concept of Eggman loving Sage like a daughter. But there's absolutely no buildup or elaboration to this. Nothing to bounce off of, no one comments much on what they think of Eggman's newfound surrogate fatherhood, or anything. Sage has nothing to do with these islands, or their people. 

The whole thing just makes no fucking sense. I guess Titans are sentient, but not really, so it's fine that Sonic murders them. The game acts as if it's gonna have some sort of dire moral dilemma for Sonic, with Sage asking him repeatedly if he truly believes he's doing the right thing. You start to think, "Oh, maybe Sonic's somehow ruining this environment, and he has to struggle over saving nature or his friends", or some sort of spin on his arrogance, or just, anything. It really goes nowhere. The themes that the game has a loose idea of wanting to represent are... overly explained, to put it lightly. Ian Flynn has Chris Nolan syndrome to the highest degree. We didn't need to see Sage talking about how she's so lonely and envies what Sonic has and all that, we could see it on her face. The characters in general often act very unnaturally. They come off more as machines designed to spout off expository dialogue, rather than fleshed out characters. The mystery of the game that the story so heavily relies on is practically handed to you, by Sonic somehow coming to these very oddly specific conclusions, and explaining them in a very long-winded way. So much of the dialogue is just people explaining all this overly elaborate nerdy world building, especially in the cutscenes with Tails. 

Speaking of which, there's a very random scene where Tails concludes that he needs to be more independent from Sonic. It's so bizarre and has nothing to do with the story. It's like they're trying to bounce off of Tails's cowardice in Sonic Forces, but it doesn't work. It comes off as Tails is being independent for the first time, and Sonic is emotionally moved by it. As if Tails hasn't been making robots that can fucking shoot people, breaking into maximum security federal prisons 20 fucking years ago. It would've made more sense if they had just mentioned that Tails felt he had lost it a little after something has traumatic as Sonic being taken prisioner to be "tortured" and Eggman taking over the world took place. Tails's behavior in Forces could've made sense if they had just elaborated on that, and they had the chance to here, but it just ends up being bizzarree, like Tails is just now breaking free of Sonic. I actually find it more insulting than the scene in Forces, because it implies Tails hasn't already been independent. 

And goddamn, the fucking references here. Wow, this reminds me of that level, or that one thing from that one game. Look, it's great that they're tying everything together. But everything just feels inorganic. No one talks like this. Imagine if regular people spoke like this. “Wow, this place has a bathroom. Just like the bathroom at my old middle school!” The lack of subtlety going into it is nauseating. I think people have already made this comparison, but it feels like they're just perpetually setting up a Family Guy cutaway gag that never occurs. And with how much they reference older shit, you'd think they talk about how Eggman took over the fucking world, the worst case scenario they'd been fighting against for years, an experience that would've irreversibly altered their very being? But no, next to nothing.

People keep saying that "Sonic is back" and that this game is a return to form somehow. I don't see it. Even in terms of if you like the dark age Sonic stories, I don't see it. At least Forces had a big showdown at the end, it had a more traditional Sonic charisma. Sonic kept his sneering grin, his cocky attitude, he made cringey speeches about friendship. I have a lot of issues with his characterization in that game, but it feels a lot more like Sonic than whatever this is. Characters like Sonic and Eggman dialing back their performances so drastically just results in seeing two characters stripped of what makes them.. them. I might as well be watching air, seeing these characters in action in Frontiers. And here, Sonic, and everything around him, feels more sterile. Yes, the story in Sonic Forces was massively underwhelming, especially considering the sheer scope of the plot of Eggman taking over Sonic's home. But I found this even more underwhelming. Characters just stand around and talk. Sonic transforms into Super Sonic four times in the game with no progression, no ending that's significantly more climatic to build up to. No sense of basic story progression. This doesn't feel like an Adventure era or Dark age era Sonic story to me at all. It's the midness of a meta era story, only completely lifeless. Forces had life to it, Forces had blaring music, over the top set pieces. The quickness, switching up the scenery, even if it was a lot of re-using assets. Forces felt like a glorified mobile game, yes, but it had more identity and fun to it.  

And here we have this game that shuns the uniqueness of Sonic the Hedgehog in favor of generic modern video game tropes. A hodgepodge of other, more successful games. Sonic Frontiers has no identity of its own. It's a hollow, empty game. Ungodly repetitive in both its gameplay and story. I can honestly say it's one of my least favorite Sonic games, and one of the only Sonic games I consider to just be straight up bad.

#sonic the hedgehog #sonic frontiers #video game review #video games #ps5 #playstation 5 #xbox #nintendo switch

[cinnamonest]

Albedo idol girl darling thoughts M A N I F E S T E D

----------

Well, to be entirely honest, he thinks the whole idol thing is a little dumb.

For someone like him, at least. He's a PhD student in his final semester, lots of work to be done and all that. So, you know, he's a responsible, accomplished adult. Not the kind of person who gets into "that stuff," as he calls it in his head.

Nor does he even know how he encountered it... He just takes the occasional break from work to mindlessly open whatever app first pops into his vision and scroll through the feed. He's never watched anything like it in his life, so he's not exactly sure why he gets recommended some idol girl thing, and even less sure why he taps it without really thinking. Probably one of those videos that gets recommended to everyone. Well, can't be that, it doesn't have that many views... Probably loosely connected to some video game he's searched before or something. He's familiar with idols and what they are, and the subculture surrounding them, but he's never really cared about it.

Honestly, it's kinda pathetic that a bunch of grown adult men get so obsessed over these girls, he thinks as he watches. He's seen the type. Lonely, asocial dudes, most definitely virgins whose only female attention in their entire life is their mother, well into adulthood with no real social group to speak of.

...Not that he's much better off, but he hasn't quite sunk down to their level. The only reason he doesn't talk to people much is because they're busy, and he's even busier. He managed to make a few friends in undergrad years. Well, study partners who mooched off his notes since he was one of the top students, but same idea. They were people he spoke to more than once, which is what constitutes a friend, right? And for the record, one time in high school a girl in his class said she liked his hair. He hasn't changed the way he wears it since. Whenever he's sad, he thinks about that compliment from 10+ years ago, and it makes him feel a little better. But now, he's constantly slammed with work and research.

And his acquaintances are also all busy. He sees notifications every now and then from social media he never checks. Everyone is getting married at this stage in life, both friends and even other PhD students in his department. Not that he's ever been invited to a wedding, he just overhears a lot of conversations, sees notifications of posts. And he will too, eventually. He just has to finish up his degree, and then... Meet a girl. Well, that's actually the second step, step one would be finding out how to go about meeting a girl. He's... Never done it before. Probably does not happen sitting in the research lab at 11:30 pm on YouTube. He's talked to one of the other PhD students who's a girl before. And only stutters sometimes. He was even able to look her in the face while he talked to her once. That's a good start.

Ok, so maybe he is a little bit pathetic, but not as bad as... These guys. Reading the comments of the video actually make him feel a little better about himself, because frankly, they're kinda wild. The worship and fawning over girls is one thing, but they even have timestamps referring to various members like "she's super cute here!" Or "you can kinda see her thigh at 3:12!" Etc etc. Yeesh, creepy. And they get into comment fights over who is the best member, as if it even matters. It's fascinating in a human-social-experiment sort of way, the manifestation of a subculture and how humans interact with each other. On and on it goes, hundreds of commenters. He pays more attention to the comments than the actual video, but the song is kinda catchy in that annoying sort of way, and the girls are cute, just kinda... The typical thing he'd expect from idol groups. But the building will close soon, so he taps back to home screen and swipes the app closed.

Unfortunately, the algorithm remembers.

And he's not certain why he clicks the next one either, the following day. The lunch breaks he takes are usually pretty rushed. Not that he has specific class times at his level of academia, but he likes to get his work done. He intentionally eats either a bit later or earlier than the lunch crowd to avoid crowds and interactions. Finds a nice secluded little table tucked away. So when he opens it back up, what do you know, several more videos get recommended. It's absent minded when he taps on one, the kind of numb-brained entertainment every modern person indulges in, videos you wouldn't really be interested in but just watch because they're there.

Ok, this is really creepy. These dudes have made compilation videos of close ups of each specific girl. It's the same group as the video he saw before, same little lewd costumes. Admittedly the girls are kinda cute. He can kinda understand the appeal. But he's not like those guys, he would never become like, obsessed with them.

The song is actually really catchy. The kind of mindlessly addictive, repetitive pop music that's the same four chords over and over, each song is so similar you can't really tell them apart, but it gets stuck in your head anyway. This group has... nine members. Who needs that many singers in one group? It's not like a band or anything, they all just sing and do their little choreography. Guess that's a form of talent, even though he doesn't really get it.

Some of the groups he sees in recommended videos are cute and wholesome, and while this group is cute too, there's a very... Blatantly intentional lewdness to their poses and costumes. A hypersexualized sort of cuteness. Clearly marketed at lonely losers who have nothing better to do with their time than obsess over a girl who will never even know they exist.

He taps another video.

So many compilations, yikes. He has to give the guys credit, they're insanely loyal to the individual member that they decide to fixate on. Oh, and they even make official figurines and posters for these girls, that's... Something.

And a few days later he can kinda recognize the girls. They have color themes, you know, identical costumes except each girl's is a different color. This lead one is red, this main backup is blue, etc etc. Lots of bright colors. Kinda hurts his eyes to be honest.

And he's seen compilations of every girl except... The pink one. The pink one is always kinda off to the side. Well, these groups do have their favoritism, there's apparently one or two lead singers in all of the major idol groups, and the rest are basically backups and dancers. Still, a lot of dudes get super devoted to the non-main girls. So yeah, he's never seen a compilation for the pink one... He can't always exactly remember which one is which but now he's seen enough to know the other girls' names. He's not sure what hers is though. So he googles it and gets the name.

Wonder why she doesn't have as many videos...? Oh, it's because she's the newest member. Only been around a few months. There's... A whole board dedicated to the group, which he's getting this information from. Wow, pathetic. What kind of person spends their free time browsing a forum for an idol group? Well, he's just doing it to find information, not for fun or anything. He was just curious. Now he knows and he can forget about it and never look at anything related to them again... after he types her name and group name into the YouTube search bar and checks the results out, that is.

Oh, so they do have some compilations for her, just not many. "(Name) thigh compilation." Fuck, these people have no limits to how creepy and pathetic they can get, he thinks... as he watches the video. Ok, admittedly there are some good thigh shots there. There's a comment. "At 4:26 you can see her panties." Pathetic. They're not wrong though. Just to be sure, you see, he tapped the timestamp, and you can, in fact, see them. Stripes. Cute.

But he still has to do his work. Can't get too invested in watching mindless videos all day. He's got a thesis to work on.

That makes him curious, though, he thinks as he goes about his research. Do these girls go to school? Do they like, skip college, or do they join some kind of performing arts school or...? So he googles it. He can remember the pink one's name now, so he just finds her Wikipedia page. Oh, so she joined right out of high school and has been in various groups ever since.

Wait, various groups? So she has more groups she's been in? What are those? Before he typed her name into the search along with the group name, but if he just searches her name he gets... A lot more content from earlier years. Huh. Didn't know some of them did group-hopping like that.

Still, no education. Must be all smiles and body and no brains. Guess that's all you really need. Yeah, looking at that whole act they do... All giggly and childish and lewd... She's probably not too bright. At least she's pretty and sings nice. And the thighs are rather good. Smooth looking. They have a sort of jiggle when she jumps up and down on stage. The thigh highs they make those girls wear have that nice little dip where the skin is compressed by the fabric. Like... right there at that closeup. He takes a screenshot.

It's readily available, he's already seen the video and knows the best parts, whereas searching for porn would take time. The sooner he can get the daily stress relief out of the way the sooner he can work on his thesis. So this way is faster. That's why he's jerking off to the thigh video and not taking the time to look for porn. Plus, it makes him cum faster. Which it probably shouldn't since it's just thighs, but... Probably has something to do with the tease of it all maybe. That makes sense.

Or maybe it's that cute little giggle he can hear at some parts. She smiles and jumps and spins and laughs.

...It makes him wonder what she'd look like crying. Scared. Whimpering. Covered in bruises and bite marks. The contrast between that state and the one on the screen. The process and the things he could do to get her from one to the other. Yeah, he realizes, it's that thought, rather than the happy giggling on video or tease aspect, that makes him cum.

He's aware that his... tastes... are a little on the fucked up side, but hey, there's plenty of bastards out there far worse than him.

One day he discovers she has social media platforms. He... Doesn't really have any. He doesn't have Twitter or Instagram or any of that but... He downloads the app and makes an account for each. Just to follow her. Ooh, they even have the option to get a notification every time she posts... That's good. Otherwise he might check too frequently. He sets a special sound effect for notifications for her socials. The first few times, you see, he would get super excited when his phone went off, only to be disappointed when it was just a work email. Thus, he made the separate sounds.

He wouldn't say he has a favorite, that sounds really cringey you know? He just... Likes her more than the others. ...Dammit, that's what a favorite is. Ok, maybe he has a favorite, that's not that bad. He's not obsessed. He hasn't bought any merchandise at all or anything, especially not member-specific merchandise. Which they do have, because he visited the store page for a while and spent all his willpower physically restraining himself from buying something. It's not that he's biased, he just thinks she's objectively better than the rest of the group. Which can be backed up with evidence, anyone with eyes could tell by watching the performances.

As to what specifically draws him to her... he's not certain, to be honest. Maybe it's because she's the least appreciated out of the group, new and all. The less popular one. Or maybe her personality... She seems so sweet, even though he knows it's probably just an act for the fans. Or maybe just those thighs. That's also a valid possibility.

He cracks and buys some of the merchandise. Only about $300 worth. But honestly, he gets more invested into just printing out pictures of you. Pasting them onto the wall above his desktop. It keeps him going when the nights are hard.

But he refrains from ever commenting on anything. Some of these losers are just... so embarrassing, he can't stomach the thought of being associated, even if it's just an anonymous comment online. It's still pretty... Distasteful. He still browses the boards every day. You're his lock screen now. And home screen. And also your solo is his ringtone. He only sets his phone on sound when he's alone at home, though, when he's at work he puts it on vibrate. He... doesn't want anyone hearing that. No offense. He has some appropriate amount of shame, unlike the other bastards.

And the girls probably know that most of their fans are these kind of loser men, right? She'd probably be surprised someone nearly graduating with a chemistry doctorate is sitting around watching these dumb videos. Is that more or less pathetic? He thinks less, hopefully.

In fact, the other fans kind of irritate him. They're really cringy and annoying and it gives him secondhand embarrassment. And something... Deeper. Something about seeing the comments upsets him on a visceral level. It's gross. Sure, he's grateful for the dudes who sit around and make a list of timestamps for upskirt shots and the like, but... It kinda bothers him, feeling like there's some other dude out there sitting around, watching these long videos with his gross eyes and recording the times of shots that get him off. It feels gross. But more like... A violation against you. Sure, your group is very blatantly sexualized and intentionally risque in clothing but... Still, it feels wrong for someone to go through and get to see all of that.

Well, someone else. It's ok for him, since he's not a gross degenerate like the rest of them. He does genuinely see himself as... Above them. You know how like, back in the day, how the nobles used to sit around and watch plays from the far back while the peasants gathered around the stage? It's like that. He's not a gross loser or a NEET or anything like that. He's got a life. Well... Not a social life, but he's doing better than them, at least he has a degree, and soon a higher degree, and a job. He has a lot of things they don't. Basic hygiene. Student loan debt. And uh... Well, he's probably more pleasant to interact with, at least he's not gonna be frothing at the mouth like an animal if he saw you in real life. He would certainly freeze up, but that's preferable, isn't it?

And one day there's a video circulating in the idol community - not that he's a part of it or anything, he just keeps getting the dumb videos and watching them for mindless entertainment - where some girl group had an attempted kidnapping. Not her group, but some other group. The video has gone viral. Some dude tried to rush the stage and pull one of the girls away. Apparently the cops found he had an obsession with her.

What an idiot. If you're gonna kidnap someone, put some effort in, jeez. It's not hard to figure out how to do it right.

If that were him, he wouldn't be that stupid, he'd just look for an interval where she's alone. They have those solo or breakout group songs where some of the girls are backstage, just get her then. Memorize the concert schedule, wear something over your face, chloroform her, and stuff her into something and walk right out. Easy.

....

He catches himself in the thought and realizes that might have been a bit creepy, but he was just thinking in terms of hypotheticals. If he was the kind of crazy to do that, that's what he'd do, that's all.

He's always enjoyed entertaining strategic thoughts, really. He's had a couple fantasies about how he would commit murders of this or that person before, and he's never murdered anyone, so thoughts don't lead to actions. He just... Really doesn't like those people, and the fantasies help him... Deal with it. He just likes to strategize about methods, and how he'd get away with it... Stuff like that. Actually, he's convinced it's a very normal thing, but no one wants to admit it. Everyone has detailed murder fantasies every now and then.

Which is why this is no different. He's just strategizing because it's fun. He has no intentions of doing anything for real. He just plans out the details like a game. And tells himself to just never think about it again.

Until one specific night that he's staring down at his screen. Lying in bed. He should be asleep, he needs to be up early tomorrow but... He's just checking to be sure he's reading this correctly. You're coming to his town? He wouldn't think so, since it's not too big, just your average college town. But still, you'll be right here, right in his general vicinity, not far away at all.

Not that he'd ever actually go to such an event. No way. He hates crowds with a passion. He hates loud environments even more. A concert is like his worst nightmare. Besides, knowing the general audience of your group, it'll be a bunch of sweaty NEET dudes who haven't showered in a month and haven't crawled out of their house in even longer. No thank you.

But.

That's when the thought pops back up. It's been a few months since that night he had that strategizing fantasy, and, well, he tried to forget it but... It kinda lingered in the back of his mind. And now it's back in full force.

He shrugs the idea off. It's crazy. He'd never actually do something like that. It was just a fantasy.

...But he could get away with it if he wanted to.

He's not scared or anything, no, he's confident in his strategizing. He knows he could. Totally. It's foolproof. There's no need to carry it out to know that, besides, what would he even do with you?

Well, he's pretty certain he does know what he would do with you. He's watched that thigh video maybe a hundred times now. And even if he won't admit it, he's jerked off to the exact same fantasy for like, several months.

He doesn't really... Think about it. Just kind of slips into subconscious actions. Autopilot. One click and well, there goes $400 on an amp case. His eyes gaze over the dimensions... And then there's your height on the Wikipedia page... Yeah... That should work. He gets it sent to the address a few doors down just in case, and snatches it from in front of their door, but he finds himself backpedaling. What the hell is he doing? He would never actually go through with this, what a waste of money... But he still opens it. Sets it beside his front door. Tests the wheels to make sure they work.

He knows how to make chloroform. He doesn't need YouTube tutorials (unlike a certain someone else), he knows exactly how to do it, even alternate methods besides the usual acetone and bleach combination - so long as you end up with the same chemical makeup, it's all the same. He just goes with the traditional way though... Doesn't really know why he does it. Just mutters as he stares down at the concoction wondering why he wasted his time... But he pauses before pouring it down the sink, and instead puts it in a container and keeps it on the counter. Your weight is on Wikipedia too. Taking into account your height and weight you would need about... Yeah, a very specific amount to knock you out for about three hours.

The concert day draws closer and closer and he can't sleep very well. His mind keeps running what-ifs. Just, hypothetically, what if he did go through with it? What then? What would he do long term? How would that all work out?

Well, you'd probably hate him for a while, right? But that changes. Stockholm syndrome sets in. He would know, he had to take Psych 101 back in undergrad, and the professor talked about it for a full 10 minutes, so he's basically an expert. It's been like, 7 years since then, but he still kinda remembers it. He remembers that it's supposed to set in at about 2 weeks, and solidify with time. If the captor is nice, that is, which he totally would be. ...Maybe not in bed, but most of the time. He would be nice to you, and you would start to like him. Besides, they said Stockholm syndrome set in faster if the abductor has good qualities, so, he could also reason with you, remind you that you're lucky you got abducted by someone with money - or, well, he will have money once he graduates! - and isn't some ugly gross slob. He's clean and neat. Sorta... He'll clean up all those dishes that have been sitting there a few days now, pick up all those clothes off the floor... Ok, now he's clean and neat. And, uh, what else would girls care about... He's smart. He's pretty sure he can say that with confidence, if nothing else.

Ok, so, it would work. He could... Keep you kinda... Tied up here... If you started complying within that two week period, he could get you up and walking before atrophy set in. You'd probably have to get used to the lifestyle... Right now he's kinda on a budget, but, he can get you things to keep you occupied... And so, yeah, it could work. It's simple, just keep you with him and isolated for a few weeks and uh, you'll transform into some kind of hypersexual obedient cumslut and never want to leave. That's... How Stockholm syndrome works right? Maybe he should have paid more attention in that class... Oh well. He never liked psychology.

So the day draws nearer and nearer and he starts really getting into the right... Headspace. It's a sort of manic state that he's in. Operating without really thinking, all inhibitions removed by simply refusing to think about it. He lets the subconscious take over and do all these little things to prepare, until finally that day is tomorrow. And then he kinda snaps back to full awareness and questions, again, what the hell is he doing? He can't just... Kidnap a person! Normal people don't do that... It's illegal, he'll get caught, it'll ruin his life and....

What life does he really have to ruin?

That's the thought that sort of solidifies the decision. He realizes why he's even on this path in the first place. Sure he's got a lot of academic accomplishments, but his life is... Rather empty. He doesn't really have anyone. Maybe that's why he's slowly become... Consumed by this obsession that yes, he's now willing to admit to himself is indeed an obsession. It's kinda slowly taken over his everyday life without him even noticing it was happening. He's... Kinda miserable. And very lonely. And... If nothing else... This one girl makes him feel kinda happy.

... Which is why he's going to go through with it.

And he slips back into autopilot, ends up standing outside the building. It's every bit as loud and headache-inducing as he knew it would be. Ugh. He can't wait to get out of here. If this doesn't work, well, he'll be forced to turn around. The plan is a very simple one, actually... Act like he's supposed to be there. And he does. Dresses in all black like stage technicians do, dragging his big amp case behind him, holding a bunch of cords from random things he grabbed in his house, and tries not to look nervous, keeps a neutral face and walks straight forward and... He slides right in. The security guards off to the side don't even bat an eye.

And then he has a moment of "well, I didn't expect to get this far." Pauses. So uh... what now? Well, probably should find you first. He memorized the setlist, so he knows when you'll be off... And alone. Right now there should be three of the girls backstage. It's pretty easy to find where you are, but he's paranoid that the amp case is too loud as he's dragging it around. It's necessary, though. And then, finally, he stumbles upon the room... Opens the door, half expecting to be immediately stopped, but... He can just kinda waltz right in here, some open backroom, a person here or there coming through, a lady that looks like a makeup artist doing something over there, and an actual, real tech guy over there... And over to the far back corner... Oh. That's you. He takes a moment to revel in the sight, unable to move or even breathe, and has to mentally prepare himself before moving forward. He's... Not sure exactly what to do at this point... It's kind of perfect, to be honest, there's no one around you, and you're right out of sight, where he could turn the corner and not be seen. But he's not sure how to... Approach? He thinks about it as he walks, but again, autopilot is on in his brain and he's just numbly walking forward. Does he just... Keep walking until he's right at you and just... Or...?

And a miracle happens. You hear someone coming and you turn and smile and ask are you the tech guy here to fix my mic? You point to the little microphone attached to your face. They told you someone would be coming to fix it before your next song. You presume that's him, since he's dressed in all black like all the other stage techs. He hesitates a moment, wide eyed, but then nods. Yeah, that's him, he says. His voice cracks when he says it. It's kinda cute.

You smile at him. It's wide and sweet and genuine and it almost makes him pass out on the spot. He has to swallow for a second before continuing.

But, uh, he can't do it right here he says, because fiddling with it could disrupt the uh, frequencies, cause that really shrill sound you hear sometimes. So, um, come over this way a sec, over in this dark corner of the studio conveniently out of the view of all people and security cameras. You don't know how any of that stuff works, so you trust him, it's his job after all. So you get up and straighten your little skirt out - wow those are even more revealing in person - and walk over it the dark corner where he's waiting and... it's the last thing you remember.

He does a quick look left and right to ensure no one saw you collapse in his arms, but sure enough, this area is empty. You fit into the amp case with ease. Just curl your body up and pop the lid on. Wait, can you... breathe in there? Well, it won't take long to get outside. He just rolls the case right out the door, right past the guards again, and no one stops him, no one suspects a thing. Puts the case in the backseat, opens the lid, does a quick check go make sure you're breathing alright. So he props it open by keeping a book in between the case and lid as he drives home.

Once he does get home, he just does the same thing he did before - close the lid, roll you into the elevator and up the stairs and into his place, looking back over his shoulder over and over. And once he gets you inside he just kinda... falls to his knees. Shivering. Disbelief. Because holy shit he actually did it. He actually went through with it and it worked. He sits there and stares at the case and - oh, fuck, gotta open it again for you to breathe. Actually, he might as well... take you out... when he first shoved you in, he was so high on adrenaline he didn't really process any of it, but now... he almost can't bring himself to take you out. That means he has to, like, touch you. He's gotta take a moment to mentally prepare for that. So he does. Deep breaths. And finally, with trembling hands, pulls you out, carries you on shakey legs over to the bed and sets you down.

You know, you're a lot... Smaller... Than you looked on screen. Sure, he knew your height and weight but... somehow you still seem so much smaller than he expected. That's good. Will make everything a lot easier, since you're easier to restrain. And your thighs. They're... so soft. This is so much better than the video. They're so... fleshy and warm in person. Perfect. And wow, that skirt thing is... scratchy. Actually, up close, that whole outfit thing you wear looks super uncomfortable. It probably is. ...Well, guess he now has a reason to take it off.

The rest of your skin is... also fleshy and soft. Warm. Your face... chest... stomach... everything. Your tits are really cute, too. It occurs to him that all those rabid commenters on all those boards and videos would probably kill to be him right now, pinching and squeezing at your nipples. He's seeing something they will never see. It gives him an ego boost, to be honest, makes him feel proud to get a sort of one-up on them. He gets you naked, but refrains from pulling your legs apart. He probably... wouldn't be able to control himself, and he's aiming for some self-control right now.

So he waits. Breathes deep. Restrains himself with every ounce of willpower he has. It occurs to him he has no fucking clue what he's gonna say to you. Unfortunately, that thought occurs to him as you're starting to twitch and mumble, so, he doesn't have too much time to think. Oh, fuck, you're not restrained... well, he bought some duct tape and handcuffs and blindfolds off of amazon too, so he quickly puts those in place as you're starting to wake up, and then finally, you come to full consciousness -- that telltale jerking at the restraints, the muffled little cry of confusion and fear. It's kinda hot to be honest. Well, fuck, very hot actually. You're so scared. It gives him a rush of power. Said rush goes straight to his dick.

He's got a mixed twist of guilt and arousal at the whole thing, but... he's still trying to have some self control... and if you start begging and pleading and crying, it would be too much. Oh, no, not that it would be too much in terms of guilt, no no, just that he wouldn't be able to stop himself from fucking you if he sees you cry. So he leaves the restraints on for now, so he can't see your face emote.

Then, he does something really, really mean. He knows it's cruel, honestly, it's just... so cute. What that is, is that he does nothing. Says nothing. He goes about his work, typing away, knowing you can hear, but doesn't say a word. He knows you're awake, he just wants to see how long you can sit there scared out of your mind before you finally make another noise to draw his attention. Right now, he thinks, you're probably debating, you're probably questioning whether you should keep quiet and make him think you're still out or make a noise... but eventually you will. He can see you trembling. You're probably thinking so many horrible things right now, wondering what will happen, what he'll do to you... it fills him with a sort of sadistic glee that overrides the guilt it comes along with. Sure, the guilt is there, but fuck, he could almost cum just watching you shiver, and that's more important.

And you finally make a noise. A little whimper. He stops typing, and swears he sees you tense when he does. And when he stands up, walks over to you (making sure to stomp hard and walk slow for extra effect, watching the way you curl in on yourself with each step he takes), and stops right in front of you. Finally, tells you not to scream. He's gonna give you water, ok? You nod. And, surprisingly, you don't make any move to scream or anything, you let him give it to you. You don't move a muscle besides your shaking and sucking the straw and swallowing the water. You must be really scared of him. He knows that's technically not what he should want, but... it feels nice.

He spent that time of silence coming up with what to say to you. He says that for now, you're going to stay right here. Don't ask questions. Don't make any attempt to escape. If you really need something, tap the headboard until he hears. Understand?

You're... Surprisingly receptive. You give a twitchy smile and stammer out an o-okay. He's almost pleased, but quickly realizes what you're doing.

You've been trained for this, you see. This kind of thing is attempted rather frequently in the industry. You received training for this situation - comply, don't fight, prioritize your safety, because in 99% of these cases, the missing idol is found and recovered within 48 hours. So you do what you were told to do -- smile, pretend you're ok with it, don't do anything to anger your captor.

He knows that too. He doesn't do much in that 48 hours, in fact, he even tells you he's waiting to "see what happens." He knows he can't control himself very well, so he stays in his living room for the most part and works on research, it might be pointless if he's in jail a few hours from now, but oh well. Sleeps on his couch. He offers to feed you, but you say you don't feel good. He understands.

See, in his mind, if he gets to fuck you once or twice and then be hauled off to prison and never touch you again, well, that would be actual, literal torture, so much so that never fucking you at all would be more bearable. So that's why he forces himself to wait now. He feels like he can't breathe, he's so nervous, like any moment police are going to come knocking on his door. Every little sound makes him jump. He can't sleep.

But 48 hours pass and... nothing happens.

He breathes a bit easier. Finally dares to go online, which he's been avoiding, and check on your situation... Oh, wow, social media has exploded over your disappearance. But... They have no leads. Nothing. Says she basically vanished out of thin air. Situation is, quote, "looking hopeless." Huh. He did an even better job than he thought he did. There's videos from loved ones begging the captor to let the girl go, offering to give him money even. A lot of money. But, you're more valuable than any monetary measurements could ever conceive. And he's happy. It really worked out. Everything went right, and for once, he has something that really, really makes him happy.

Likewise, the 48 hours are even more torturous for you. You start out telling yourself it'll be fine. Hopeful. But that hope in your chest slowly, gradually dies out as you realize you've hit the 48-hour mark. Even for a normal missing person, you've always heard that if they don't find them within 48 hours... the chances of ever finding them goes down significantly. But, that's because they're usually dead, right? And this guy won't kill you, so, your chances are better, right...?

He comes back after that 48 hours and finally, for the first time since you woke up, crawls onto the bed, touches you, grabs your hips with his hands. Tells you that, well, they haven't found anything yet and it looks like they aren't going to, so you're officially his now, and he's no longer worried. You should accept it. It'll make things easier for both of you if you do. You'll get adjusted in no time, you'll see.

Unsurprisingly, you're a bit less compliant than you were when you had hope. You whimper and and struggle, but it's really weak. So much so it's cute. You ask who he is. No one important, he says. Just... A fan of yours. You can hear clothes shuffling. He doesn't waste time, he's already waited two whole days suffering, so he gets his dick in you pretty quickly. Manages to make you cum. It horrifies you and kinda surprises him too to be honest. You must kinda like pain, huh. Well, that works out well.

As time goes on, what hope you had left dies completely. Weeks pass. You realize they're not coming for you. In an attempt to get you to accept it, he even shows you that you've been replaced. They're rather quick to fix the absence. They have a new girl in your spot by the end of the month. He quickly realizes maybe he shouldn't have told you, from the way your face falls and you get all hysterical. Sorry. It's the way the industry is. Don't worry. She's not even half as cute as you.

He shows you the announcement when they close the investigation, too. This also earns a rather hysterical response, but he thinks it's important you see it, so you can finally come to terms with your fate, the way things were always meant to turn out. He gets a bit frustrated. Just accept it. It's not that hard. The sooner you do, the happier you'll be. It's for your own good that you accept it.

And you do. Try as you might. You begin to make conversation. He's the only source of interaction you have. You learn about him and his life. You become invested in it. You start to cum more easily. When he's sitting on the opposite side of the bed typing away, you find yourself slowly wiggling your way over and pressing yourself against the warmth, and he certainly doesn't mind. You ask him about his research just to hear a voice talk.

And sometimes you sing. It's absent minded, soft and quiet, when you have nothing else to do. He likes that a lot. You get sweeter. Nicer. Fight less. It does take a bit longer than two weeks to set in fully. But it does in the end.

He can't be with you 24/7, as much as he would like to be, so sometimes he has to tell you to just hang on a little while. Be good and sit still for just a bit. He'll be back soon. Just give him an hour. You're just really distracting and, well, his progress report is due tomorrow morning.

And you keep getting upset over the new member, bring it up a lot... It must have really bothered you, huh. Well, don't feel bad about being replaced. To him, nothing could ever replace you... you're still his favorite.

#.al #.idol