#listening to creep by radiohead as I write this

[tw1lightstar]

writing semi-smut to get rid of my writers block

nsfw under the cut

Warnings | Brat taming(???), alluding to rough sex (its obviously consensual), implied fem reader. Let Me Know If I've Forgotten Any!

Also I didn't make it very explicit because I'm still practicing writing full smut

Joel's pissed, and honestly, pissed was being generous. You came into his house acting like a complete brat. He told you he needed to work.

You knew he needed to work, and yet, you begged for his attention. And here he is, giving it to you. Having your "pretty little face" (his words) stuffed into a pillow on his bed. You couldn't have waited one day?

Oh well, it's not like you can complain. I mean, listen to the noises you're making. Oh wait didn't he have to work? Oh well, he can finish it later. All he's focused on right now is giving you what you asked for. Him.

#tw1lightstar #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller #joel miller x reader smut #wow this was crazy to write #listening to creep by radiohead as I write this #implied fem reader

[undertale-writing-times]

“ You look so peaceful when you sleep.” with Daydream!

Yandere stuff! Yay... Anyway, uh, guys I do hope you know that these are bad relationships. I don't think anyone should treat anyone like these guys do. Sometimes they're good, but most of the time they really aren't.

Daydream isn't a good guy. There's no way around that.

You've been living with Daydream for as long as you can remember, and you knew that you didn't love him, but you couldn't do anything to get away from him.

You see, many months ago you met Daydream, and he gave you an offer. Stay with him, help him out around his castle, and he will give you a place to stay. He would give you anything that you could ever want, and at first, you thought that it was so nice! Then you started to learn more about him.

You learned how mean he was, even though he tried to act like he was the hero of the story. "I spread positive emotions to people! I take away their sadness." But no, he just took away their choice. You weren't allowed to have a single bad day, and if you did, he would lose his temper with you and tell you to smile.

To keep smiling.

"Nobody likes someone who doesn't smile, Y/n." and the one time that you tried to leave, after losing your temper with him, he caught you in his tentacles. He squeezed them until you felt like you would break; it sure as hell left bruises, and he told you that he was being kind to you. He has been helping you! And this is how you repay him? By acting out? What do you hope to gain from it? Then he tossed you into your room and locked the door. The only food that you were able to eat was the stuff that Faded gave you.

Now it had been months since then, and you were able to force yourself to work the way that he wanted you to. You felt more like a doll than a person. The clothing that he gave you was what he wanted you to wear. Things that he thought you would look cute in.

You didn't feel like yourself anymore.

But at least your room was yours, right? Nope! Today when you woke up, he was sitting on the bed beside you, and he smiled, moving his hand to rest on your cheek and rubbing his thumb over your cheek. "You look so peaceful when you sleep." He pulls you up gently to press a 'kiss' to the top of your head and says, "Get up and get dressed. We're going out today." You stare up at him, feeling the happiness sinking through your body. It felt like venom, even though the positive feelings were supposed to be good. You felt sick to your stomach, but you smiled weakly and nodded to show you understood. "Yes sir..." you responded.

He gets up from the bed, leaving the room, and you reach up to wipe the goop from your cheek. It had already sunk into your skin like lotion. It made your skin feel hot, clammy, and uncomfortable. You didn't like it, but hey, what could you do?

It was time to get up.

#undertale alternate universe #undertale alternate timeline #undertale ask blog #undertale au #undertale imagines #undertale headcanons #Dreamswap #Dreamswap Dream #Daydream #Yandere #tw: yandere #yandere male #yandere x reader #yandere x you #Daydream is a dick #I was listening to Creep by radiohead while writing this #7/16/2023

[yandereshingeki]

ive been thinking a lot about yandere stalker! eren recently and im thinking about speeding through a drabble on the side whenever i need a break from writing mhs.. i just have so many ideas i want to write about

#cw: stalking #cw: yandere #i mknow i have so many things i said id write drabbles about and to be fair i have started!! theyre just in my wips. because ive been BUSY #i just wanna write about him obsessing from afar for a while and being WEIRD!!! a weirdo he probably listens to creep by radiohead and goes #damnthis is just like me fr (´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`)

[pebblezone]

About to serve absolutely abysmal cunt

#talkingcore #yay choir 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 #I’m going to slay and by slay I mean song 90 minutes worth of historical church music pebblezone is being converted #British people may suck but fuck if they can’t write some banger religious music #oh that reminds me of my musicology class I took last semester which was like Yeah is it ethical to support the messiah #because some dude unearthed documents that tied like the funding for a shit ton of Hansel’s stuff to the slave trade #anyway album updates uhhh oh I listened to American football and can say easily twas the hardest listen so far #it sounded like if I combined my 2018 sad tumblr thoughts with the guitar prowess of a middle school music class being allowed to fuckaround #I love a funky rhythm I think they can be so sexy but when it just sounds like you don’t know where to place emphasis idk #I’m feeling like a hater today I’m in a hater mood rn I wanted to have an open mind for the indie boys out there and could not do it #I could not finish it which is unfortunate given it’s definitely some people’s favorite out there and I don’t wanna yuck their yum #anyway about to be the sexiest person on stage (this is actually false there is a soprano soloist and she’s stunning she slaughters an a5 #it was so vibrant I gotta make sure my face doesn’t show emotions on stage during it I shall not weep #I think Walter would like creep by radiohead. okay I gotta go dammit

[conways]

being told i was over-sexualizing an oc that ive never actually made explicit content for has inspired me to make explicit content for him. yay phoenix! ive never written in "purple prose" before its very difficult

#im listening to impera while i do it thats phoenix's album #granted in reality phoenix HAS a playlist but. i cant write gay sex while listening to creep radiohead it just cant be done.

[cha1cedony]

Another weird writing habit confession (since you guys LOVED 😍 the tidbit about how I write on my laptop with 2.5 inch side margins so it resembles my phone’s layout lol): I can only focus on writing while listening to really annoying 2000s and 2010s pop music. I write most of my sad scenes while listening to like… Shower by Becky G. Heart Attack by Demi Lovato. Ur So Gay by Katy Perry. et cetera

#I have a really long playlist of the most annoying motivational girlboss pop #also I remember finishing the last ~3k words of Ch 4 of Silver Linings while listening to Creep by Radiohead on loop #bc I couldn’t focus with any other song that night for some reason 😭 #chalcy stuff #not saying any of this music is inherently bad btw. it’s very catchy lol #but ​something about the shrill vocals of 2010s pop ballads helps me write I DON’T UNDERSTAND.

[convolutedblasphemy]

I wasn't shitting you guys btw I actually made the one-sided radiostatic playlists

here is my lyrical masterpiece. both the vox version and the alastor one. done my best to make it as lyrically accurate as possible. @styrofauxm @onesidedradiostatic i hope you enjoy this (go check out the full lyrics for the songs on google if you can't listen to it but i recommend it because all of these are bangers) feat. my stupid commentary and vox's pathetic wet cat energy

Click to listen to the Vox one on YouTube

1. the hearse — matt maeson

thought this one fit so well lyrically. the "what was it like to feel in love" part i interpreted as vox asking himself that rather than alastor

❞ i am the man we both couldn't stand, i can't wash off the dirt from my hands, what was it like to feel in love? [...] i will never go backwards, i will never be free, i will never run faster; will you sink down to me? ❝

2. i'm just ken — ryan gosling

i'm not even adding lyrics to this one, everyone should have seen the barbie movie and this song at this point. this just HAD to be in there. can you feel the kenergy?

3. too many friends — placebo

less about alastor, more about vox's existential crisis

❞ my computer thinks I'm gay, i threw that piece of junk away on the champs-elysées as I was walking home. this is my last communique, down the superhighway. all that I have left to say in a single tome... ❝

4. creep — radiohead

i mean isn't this literally his theme song?

❞ when you were here before... couldn't look you in the eye. you're just like an angel. your skin makes me cry. you float like a feather in a beautiful world. i wish I was special. you're so fuckin' special. but I'm a creep, i'm a weirdo, what the hell am I doin' here? ❝

5. where evil grows — the poppy family

y'all seen the sonic movie? we need to see vox do that dance.

❞ i like the way you smile at me, i felt the heat that enveloped me and what i saw i liked to see. i never knew where evil grew. i should have steered away from you, my friend told me to keep clear of you but something drew me near to you ❝

6. one of us — ava max

i had to edit this one a bit in the video and cut out the part about the kissing because that for sure didn't happen

❞ one of us would die for love; one of us would give it up. one of us would risk it all; one of us won't even call. one of us could say goodbye, never even bat an eye... ❝

7. colorblind — amber riley

more pathetic wet cat energy brought to you by yours truly

❞ i don't think that i'll ever find that silver lining or reason to smile. you know i used to paint such vibrant dreams, now I'm colorblind, colorblind. when did my heart get so full of never mind, never mind? did you know that you stole the only thing I needed? ❝

8. arcade — duncan lawrence

more pathetic wet cat energy brought to you by yours truly

❞ a broken heart is all that's left. i'm still fixing all the cracks. lost a couple of pieces when i carried it, carried it, carried it home. i've spent all of the love I saved. we were always a losing game; small town boy in a big arcade, i got addicted to a losing game... all i know, all i know: loving you is a losing game. ❝

9. if i can't have you — skylar astin

i picked the version from zoey's extraordinary playlist on purpose because the context of this scene is that the dude who sings it hires a bunch of singers and dancers to confess in a public space as you, the viewer, sit there and cringe at him as he gets rejected. if that doesn't have vox energy, i don't know what does.

❞ i'm good at keepin' my distance (lie), i know that you're the feelin' I'm missing. you know that I hate to admit it but everything means nothin' if I can't have you. i can't write one song that's not about you, can't drink without thinkin' about you. is it too late to tell you that everything means nothing if I can't have you? ❝

10. do you want me (dead)? — all time low

when vox asks himself whether alastor wants him or wants him dead it's definitely the second option.

❞ i let it ride on a bet, i doubled down on a sinking ship; need a second to catch my breath: do you want me? or do you want me dead? oh, give it up for at least a second; i'm getting sick of your bullshit attitude and how you walk around like you shine brighter, it's killing me, so what do you say? do you want me? or do you want me dead? ❝

11. push — ryan gosling

i can't just put one musical number from the barbie movie in and not include the other one that fits equally as well.

❞ said, i don't know if I've ever been good enough. i'm a little bit rusty and I think my head is cavin' in. and I don't know if I've ever been really loved by a hand that's touched me, and I feel like something's got to give and I'm a little bit angry, well, this ain't over, no, not here, no; not while I still need you around. ❝

Ice-cold rejection & vicious mockery: Alastor's version

the contrast of this is the best part.

Click here to listen to the Alastor one on YouTube

1. little big boy — madds buckley

he doesn't go easy on him. this is 0 compassion and 100% roast.

❞ brimstone fire and eyes aglow, little big boy's making the whole world know his name. raised on pillars and shining lights, breathing smoke for the right to keep his place. never satisfied 'till they all see how big this little boy can be. well the water's rising; tide's comin' in. does little big boy know how to swim in a pond filled with fish bigger than him? ❝

2. i help you hate me — sunrise avenue

he's so helpful fr but it's not working unfortunately

❞ i broke many hearts throughout my days. yours was the hardest one to face. though, I've never been a saint, i still love you every day, just not the lover kind of way. i know you wanna see me falling out, falling out the window. i know you wanna see me crashing down, crashing with my plane. baby, i'm way too young to die but I'll help you get over me. ❝

3. no surprise — daughtry

this is one of my favorite bands, i'm glad i got to include this.

❞ it came out like a river once i let it out when i thought that i wouldn't know how. held onto it forever just pushing it down, felt so good to let go of it now. not wrapping this in ribbons, shouldn't have to give a reason why: it's no surprise i won't be here tomorrow, i can't believe that I stayed 'til today. there's nothing here in this heart left to borrow. there's nothing here in this soul left to save. don't be surprised when we hate us tomorrow. ❝

4. go screw yourself — avery

i can picture him 1:1 delivering a swing version of this when vox confesses to him

❞ i know i've been holding it in, the way i feel about you. something i've been dying to say but I don't know how you'll take it; oh please don't go; you should know these three words i've been holding back; trying to fight, i'mma let 'em out... these three words, gotta let you know, here I go: go screw yourself. i've had enough, yeah, now we're done. ❝

5. the audacity — emelyn

this one's such a bop honestly. had to cut it in the video because i can't picture alastor realistically crying over anything vox-related.

❞ think your opinions should be broadcast... even though no one's subscribing, listening or liking but by all means, keep whining. must be tough if life's so rough. you should buy a mic, start a podcast, even though, wait, nobody asked. [...] where do all these men find the audacity? no actually, i'm stunned by your stupidity. ❝

6. friends — halocene

this one had to be on here.

❞ have you got no shame? you're looking insane turning up at my door. it's two in the morning, the rain is pouring, haven't we been here before? [...] so don't go look at me with that look in your eye, you really ain't going away without a fight. you can't be reasoned with, i'm done being polite. i've told you one, two, three, four, five, six thousand times. haven't I made it obvious? haven't I made it clear? want me to spell it out for you? f-r-i-e-n-d-s ❝

7. can't catch me now — olivia rodrigo

he likes the attention def especially after his return

❞ bet you thought i'd never do it, thought it'd go over my head. i bet you figured i'd pass with the winter, be somethin' easy to forget. oh, you think i'm gone 'cause i left but i'm in the trees, i'm in the breeze, my footsteps on the ground. you'll see my face in every place but you can't catch me now. through wading grass, the months will pass, you'll feel it all around. i'm here, i'm there, i'm everywhere but you can't catch me now ❝

8. take a hint — victoria justice & elizabeth gillies

this is on every rejection playlist and it's gonna be on mine too. a bop even after all these years.

❞ ask me for my number, yeah, you put me on the spot. you think that we should hook up, but I think that we should not. you had me at "hello", then you opened up your mouth and that is when it started going south. [...] what about "no" don't you get? so go and tell your friends i'm not really interested. it's about time that you're leavin', i'm gonna count to three and open my eyes and you'll be gone ❝

9. no — madilyn bailey & megan nicole

more rejection for y'all. the world needs more mean aroaces and this playlist is my contribution.

❞ first you gonna say you ain't runnin' game, thinking i'm believing every word; call me beautiful, so original, telling me I'm not like other girls, i was in my zone before you came along, now i'm thinking maybe you should go ❝

10. oh no — marina and the diamonds

a classic.

❞ don′t do love, don't do friends; i′m only after success. don't need a relationship, i'll never soften my grip [...] i know exactly what i want and who i want to be. i know exactly why i walk and talk like a machine. i'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy. ❝

Reblogs are appreciated!

#hazbin hotel #hazbin #alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #the radio demon #aroace alastor #hazbin hotel vox #one sided radiostatic #onesided radiostatic #staticradio #radiostatic #hazbin vox #vox

[little-star-bun]

⋆｡‧˚ʚ 𝙇𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙧 𝙀𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙚 𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙣𝙨 ɞ˚‧｡⋆ a/n: sorry I went on a tangent I just love Ellie Williams warnings: 18+ lesbian fanfiction!! Men and Minors DNI!!! Masturbation, slight stalking?, Ellie having no rizz;; I do not own Ellie or Tlou. ﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌𓆩♡𓆪﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

✎ ;; I can't stop thinking about college loser!Ellie.

Her fingers are rough and calloused from playing guitar. She plays loves songs thinking of you. Creep by Radiohead is her favorite unironically.

You're telling me she left her 2010s emo phase? No she definitely still listens to pierce the veil, fall out boy, 21 pilots. And 80s/90s rock, of course.

Her cute lesbian ass wears flannels and band t-shirts. She definitely has a carabineer on her jeans to hold her keys.

She's so in love with you, one time you let her borrow a pencil and she KEPT it. She felt so guilty about it, but you honestly never noticed it was missing.

Definitely thinks playing Wonderwall by Oasis is how she's gonna confess to you.

Sometimes she even has wet dreams about you and wakes up, shoving her hand down into her sticky boxers to get herself off to the thought of you.

She definitely whimpers and begs.

She memorized your schedule secretly and makes sure she's at least somewhere around your classes so she can see you. She always hopes to start a conversation with you, but you're too busy talking to your friends.

One day you were her partner in a science lab and she was shaking so much from being around you, you had to do all the work while she took the notes.

She had to get your number for when you write up the lab paper and she wouldn't stop staring at the contact of you in her phone.

Physically has to restrain herself from texting you all day everyday.

She writes about you in her diary. It's slightly erotic the way she describes you. Pages upon pages just talking about you and how amazing you are and how she wants to make you hers.

She plays with her cunt to the thought of fucking you, imagining your face all cock drunk and your tits. God she imagines how your boobs look way too much.

Sometimes you wear tight shirts practically teasing her. She imagines if they would be perky or plump, how they would fit in her hand... She's genuinely so perverted.

Ugh the way she has that little awkward smile. She's so cute. (⁠´⁠ε⁠｀⁠ ⁠)

She sits behind you in class, and she can smell your shampoo. It drives her crazy. She smells all of the ones at the store, trying to find the exact one.

She found your social media (she stalks it) and likes all of your posts (respectfully), but really she screenshots your photos and saves your videos. She has a photo album dedicated to you and you hardly even know this weird girl who's just so awkward.

She genuinely has no rizz, poor baby.

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌𓆩♡𓆪﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

Let me know if you want more ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡

Part Two Here

My requests and asks are open <33

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌𓆩♡𓆪﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

© 𝟸𝟶𝟸𝟹 𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎-𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛-𝚋𝚞𝚗 — 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚟𝚎𝚍 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚞𝚗𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚜𝚙𝚎𝚌𝚒𝚏𝚒𝚎𝚍 𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚠𝚒𝚜𝚎. 𝙿𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚎 𝚍𝚘 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚖𝚘𝚍𝚒𝚏𝚢, 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚖, 𝚛𝚎𝚙𝚘𝚜𝚝, 𝚘𝚛 𝚌𝚘𝚙𝚢 𝚖𝚢 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚔!

#loser!Ellie #Ellie Williams x reader #Ellie smut #Tlou #pervert!Ellie #Ellie x reader smut #ellie headcanons #little-star-bun #I love lesbian ellie #Shes got no rizz and its perfect #shes so babygirl

[grungeprincess2]

~*~☆~♡~☆~*~

Welcome to my blog♡

More about me because of my 1000 followers (thanks for that)!

My name is Natasha/Natasza and I use pronouns she/her. I am pretty new on Tumblr. I try to post everyday (I am trying!) I post different things from moodboards (My fav), to ideas or quotes.

For who is this blog?

Grunge/Alt/Goth/Metalhead/Punk girlies and boys

For someone who is looking for outfit/makeup inspirations

90s fashion and makeup fans

People who like aes moodboards

Addicted to pinterest

Kurdt,Dave,Krist and Nirvana fans

When you feel like you were born in the wrong generation

Lana fans

If you are vintage fashion person

Downtown, Nyc,Rockstar/gf vibe lovers

Female and male manipulator music listeners

For who is this blog NOT for:

Homophobes, Transphobes , Racists and any kind of phobes

Creeps (Leave me alone)

Scammers, Spammers

People who write that Courtney killed Kurt or other theories about his death

Kids under 12 (just too young)

People joking abt Kurts death

Elitists

People who dont respect others and judge by looks/music taste

Haters hating without reason

Facts about me:

-I love acting, listening to music, watching films and drawing.

-Spending most of my free time on Pinterest, Tumblr, Youtube or Tiktok

-Weird obsession with Kurt Cobain

-I have a dog

-Music is literally my life

-I want to do everything but at the same time I dont want to do anything

- I love food

-My fave movies for now:

Inception

The Craft

Thirteen

Christiane F.

Interstellar

Dont look up

Still a lot of movies to watch prob gonna change.

For now my favourite bands/music artirts (not in order):

Nirvana- My favourite band of all time. I started listening to them 1.5 years ago and it changed my life. I just love them.

Hole- Pls people dont write that Courtney killed Kurt.

Sonic Youth- So underrated...

Lana Del Rey- She is so iconic

Black Sabbath- Legendary band

Deftones- obviously

Slipknot- On full volume>

Pixies- Another underrated band

Iron Maiden- Classics

The Cure, Radiohead, The Smiths or male manipulator music in general>>>>

And more...

Mutuals?

(Pls text me)

Bonus: Random pics taken by me

~*~☆~♡~☆~*~

#abt me <3 #about myself #about blog #grungy blog #blog #mutuals #nirvana fans #kurt cobain fans #girlblogging #blogger #grunge tumblr #alt tumblr #alt subculture #cool people #rockers #friends #my pics #dont steal #pls talk to me #grungy girls #metalhead #lana del rey #sonic youth #holeband #pixies #deftones #black sabbath #slipknot #heavy metal #nu metal

[stardew-shitposterino]

Stardew Valley Bachelors and songs they listen to based on the shit I listen to

These are based on my music taste and what I think they’d like out of my own playlist. I was music deprived all week due to my finals so I’m compensating now. Enjoy ✨

Sam:

~I’m yer Dad - Grlwood

~Black Sheep (Brie Larson Vocal Version) - Metric

~ The Lovecats - The Cure (he doesn’t know the meaning of the lyrics, he thinks it sounds neat)

~ Hayloft - Mother Mother

~ Spoon - Cibo Matto

Sebastian:

~ Do Unto Others - Mindless Self Indulgence (they are cancelled, but he strikes me as the guy who once liked them)

~ Hard to touch you - Grlwood

~ Little Pistols - Mother Mother

~ I write Sins not Tragedies - Panic! at the Disco

~Cop Car - Mitski

Harvey:

~ Oh to be in Love - Kate Bush

~ Your Woman - White Town

~ To Binge - Gorillaz

~FM - Nathan Haines

~ Lola - The Raincoats

Elliott:

~ Say yes to Heaven - Lana Del Rey

~ Light Shower- Melanie Martinez

~ Hey Lover - The Daughters of Eve

~ Mowgli’s Road - Marina

~ Candy Store - Heathers The Musical (it’s his guilty pleasure)

Shane:

~ A.D.I.D.A.S - Korn

~ Vicinity of Obscenity - System of a Down

~ Freak on a Leash - Korn

~ Tear you Apart - She wants Revenge

~ Creep - Radiohead

Alex:

~ Every time we touch - Electric Callboy

~ Do it to It - ACRAZE

~ Lose Control - Missy Elliott

~ New Gold - Gorillaz

~ Pump it - Electric Callboy

——————————————————————————

I’m doing the same for the Bachelorettes, just didn’t feel like doing them all at once.

#stardew valley #sdv #sdv shane #sdv bachelors #shane stardew valley #stardew valley shane #stardew shane #shane sdv #sdv harvey #Stardew Harvey #harvey stardew valley #sdv Elliott #stardew elliott #elliott stardew valley #sdv Sam #sam stardew #stardew sam #sam stardew valley #sdv sebastian #sebastian sdv #stardew sebastian #sebastian stardew valley #sdv Alex #Alex sdv #stardew alex #alex stardew valley #sdv headcanons #stardew valley headcanons

[ultr6violnce]

SONGS I ASSOCIATE W CHARLIE WALKER.

a/n : btw u don't have to agree w some of these , most of these r js songs & artists i listen to alot and associate w char!! <3

• pretend - alex g.

• there's this girl - sign crushes motorist

• Leave - whirr

• just - radiohead

• creep - Radiohead

• karma police - radiohead

• dumb - nirvana

• i h3art y0u - boy fantasy & g0r3c0r3

• pretty when you cry - lana del rey

• cruel world - Lana del Rey

• heavenly - CAS

• you're all i want - CAS

• when the sun hits - slowdive

• poison tree - grouper

• i was all over her - salvia palth

• dream - salvia palth

• reprise - salvia palth

• your face - wisp

• linger - the cranberries

• Sunday - the cranberries

• dreams - the cranberries

• off to the races - lana del rey

• fuck it i love you - lana del rey

• song about me - TV girl

• Adam - Alex g

• brian is the most beautiful - memo boy

• race - alex g

• Mrs magic - strawberry guy

• the way i see things - lil peep

• this feeling - Øneheart

• break - Alex g

• wait for you - Alex g

• This night has opened my eyes - the smiths

a/n : i enjoyed doing this alot fr , like i said before u don't have to agree w some of the songs on here these r mostly just songs that make me think of charlie when listening to them not necessarily what he'd listen too although ik his dorky ass would be a huge alex g fan. ANYWAYS i hope u like this and I'll probably see you in the next like 1000000 years when i decide to write again !! 😜😜

#rory culkin #i ❤️ rory culkin #charlie walker #hes so cute #scream 4

[boysplanetrecaps]

Build Up Episode 0: Getting to Know the Boys Part 1: Team AllRound

Hey, friends! I’m struggling with writing the recap for episode one of Build Up on MNET because I want to stop and give you the background on everyone, which makes the recap really hard to follow. So I figure I’ll spend some time giving you their backgrounds in four separate posts, to help you get to know the guys. I mention things like where else you may have seen them, if they're in an idol group, who knows who, etc, as well as my opinion of their voice based on their teaser performance. I think it’ll make the recaps easier, both to read and to write. In this first post of four, I’ll be talking about the twelve contestants who chose to join the “Allround” category, as opposed to “Soul”, “Power”, or “Unique.” Let’s go!

Before we go on, I just want to let you know that I’ll sharing my informed opinion on their singing voices. I am going to be a little bit harder on them than I am on singers on Boys Planet, with the understanding that these are all great vocalists. We’re looking for the S+ tier guys amongst a group that is A tier at worst. So if I say anything a bit negative about a fave of yours, understand that I’m not saying that he’s a bad singer! Every guy here is an excellent singer. Cool? Cool! 

I also have to apologize, but most of my screenshots are going to be pretty awkward. The video I'm watching makes it really hard to use because every time you pause it, it opens all sorts of porny popups. When it's paused, it has a huge pause symbol in the middle of the picture. So I have to try to take screen shots while it's in motion. It's not easy! Hope you understand.

Also, I have even less time than usual to proofread these posts, so please forgive me for my inevitable typos. <3 Thank you!

Choi Suhwan

Suhwan is currently a soloist. He’s released a few digital singles, none of which have really taken off, unfortunately. You might remember him from ProduceX 101, where he made it to episode 11, so the final cut before the finale, finishing in 28th place. Pretty good!

He was V17, doing a cover of Energetic by Wanna One. I wasn’t blown away by that performance -- it sounded a little processed, and I wasn’t completely sure it was live --  so I sought out another one. Here’s a live performance of his song Losing Sleep. Unfortunately, in this performance, I found his voice a little too nasal and affected to be to my taste, and he had serious issues with his upper mix. He’s not a terrible singer, but there are a lot of stronger singers on this show. Or maybe I’m wrong and he’ll do better next time. Fighting! 

Bitsaeon

Bitsaeon is 28, and is the main vocalist from M.O.N.T. He seems to have a predilection for soft fuzzy sweaters. He was V36, singing Rose Blossom by H1-Key, and all I wrote down in my notes was “this is just a really nice voice.” I just really liked it. Clean, smooth, easy to listen to.

I think this performance of Creep by Radiohead shows both what I like and what I don’t like as much about his performances. He does a lot of this soft whisper singing in his covers, which seems like a waste of what he can do. I love his full belts -- they’re so good. I want to hear him sing full-on more often in songs, like he did with Rose Blossom.  

M.O.N.T. has a whole complicated dealie that I just don’t have the energy to figure out -- the wikipedia page explains some of it. They’re mainly a three member group, with a leader, a rapper, and a main vocal. They haven’t put out any singles in a while, so I’m not sure what’s going on with them. 

Incidentally, Bitsaeon almost certain knows Jay reasonably well. Jay was involved in this thing called MONT Arena that was supposed to collect more members for MONT, so along the way I’m sure they met. In fact, Jay is still signed to the same agency as them (along with a few other agencies).

Seunghun

Seunghun is 24 and a member of CIX. His teaser song was V01, Rain by Paul Kim, and his performance was kind of… not my favorite. He sounded at times almost like he had a cold, and at other times I’m pretty sure he went off key -- I don’t know the song so I can’t be sure but it sounded off. He showed a lack of agility on one of his vocal runs, which means that as he tried to sing a lot of different notes all in a row, he had trouble transitioning from note to note quickly and hitting them all neatly. He had to switch awkwardly to falsetto to hit a single high note in the middle of a line, which is kind of not the goal. I think he may just have been nervous or having an off day. 

Seunghun also competed on YG Treasure Box, which I didn’t watch, but maybe you did. 

Let’s talk about CIX, baby! (Ok, that joke relies on you pronouncing it “six” but it’s really pronounced “see-eye-ex,” if you read the hangul). 

CIX is a five-member group under C9 entertainment, which is also the home to Cignature and Epex. CIX features Wanna One’s Bae Jinyoung, who is the center and face of the group. As sometimes happens in cases like this, the member who was in the big Produce group is famous and attracts stans, while sometimes the rest of the group just doesn’t get as much love, and the group as a whole suffers. See also: Gugudan, Weki Meki. However, CIX does ok. Per genius.com, “The group has released several Top 10 albums in South Korea, including Hello Chapter Ø: Hello, Strange Dream which gave them their first chart-topper in the country. The group’s singles have also consistently landed in the Circle Music chart.” So CIX is a little bit closer to say, IVE than it is to, say, Weki Meki. 

Personally, I like CIX -- I think the members are talented --  but I don’t love all their songs. However, their song Cinema is so smooth and lovely, it’s like a glass of orange-peach juice for your soul, and that’s in great measure because of their smooth vocals. (Seunghun is the one with the blue hair in that clip, if you want to watch it.) In fact, this is the song I wanted to listen to in the car on the way to the hospital to have surgery a year or two ago when I was feeling pretty scared. My fella said, “This is nice. I like this.” So if you never heard it, give it a chance. I’m looking forward to getting to know Seunghun a bit better and seeing him on a better day.  

Yeo One

Yeo One is 28, and is a lead vocalist for Pentagon. I don’t have to tell you about Pentagon, right? Another excellent group who lost a member and whose popularity has ebbed and flowed. If you watched Boys Planet, you know about Hui, and you know that I like Pentagon a lot! 

Yeo One left Cube Entertainment just a few months ago, in October of 2023, along with several other members of Pentagon, so though Pentagon hasn’t disbanded, their further activities will be a bit tricky. He had a sold-out solo concert recently, and was profiled in Rolling Stone Korea, so he’s doing ok for a recently solo artist. Yeo One is a lead vocalist of Pentagon, not one of their two main vocalist, and on kprofiles, he actually ranks in last place in the popularity poll. He often would be given pretty brief lines in most Pentagon songs. But we will get to know him and get to love him on this show, right, team? 

He performed a ballad for his teaser (V40) and all I wrote in my note to myself is “I hate songs like this so much I almost can’t think straight.” So, instead, I found this little song that apparently he wrote and performed himself -- it’s light and charming. It sounds like a guy sitting by the fire making up a song on guitar and singing it to himself. He’s not a super skilled vocalist from what I’ve heard thus far, not a powerhouse like Hui, but he has a charming vocal color and is just sort of a generally a lovable dude.  

Hwang Inhyuk

Inhyeock / Inhyuk (I’ve seen it transliterated both ways -- both would be 인혁 in Hangul) is 26 and is apparently both a soloist and a member of a vocal group called Unison. Unfortunately, I can’t find anything about them since there’s also a Japanese group called “Unison Square Garden” and when you search “Korean vocal group unison” all you get is information about K-pop songs sung in unison, so…. Yeah. Inhyuk is also a composer and lyricist, and has competed on I Can See Your Voice (I’m not sure which season) and Sing for Gold. 

He was V29 and performed a song called The First Day. Again, my perspective is skewed because it’s another feckin’ ballad and no thank you. The opening section when he’s singing in a soft, almost gruff voice is really charming, though. It’s so different from what you’d expect from his appearance and general demeanor. He has a really distinct vocal color, and I think he should have chosen “unique” rather than “allround.” Once he heads into the chorus, which requires belting some higher notes, his voice falters a bit. I just get that feeling that maybe he can do better than what he showed in this teaser. Maybe he wasn’t warmed up properly, or maybe he had a bit of a cold, something like that. The potential is there and I sense training was involved. I’m going to keep an open mind about him. 

Geonu

Geonu is from Just B and is 22. In addition to going on I-land, he also went on a show called Dancing High, which also featured Seo Won who you may remember from Boys Planet. God, there are so many of these shows. I kind of remember Geonu from I-land, where he did pretty well, making it close to the end. It’s kind of a shame that he didn’t make it into Enhypen since Enhypen is definitely short on vocalists. 

If you want to check out one of Geonu’s previous performances, here he is doing a duet performance of BTS’s Butterfly on I-land with Heesung (who did go on to debut in Enhypen). 

Geonu has gotten a bit better since then; here is his audition for this show, where he was V10. 

His upper mixed register has gotten stronger and a lot less breathy compared to when he was on I-land, but he seems to have developed an unpleasant nasality. Maybe being on this show will spur him to adjust his methodology. He has a really pleasant vocal color and a lot of potential. 

(I discuss Just B in Bain’s write up.) 

Jang Intae

Per my online sleuthing, Intae, age 27, is a singer-songwriter and is one half of the duo 415. (Their group is named for the fact that both members were born on April 15th, 1997.) 415 has put out seven digital singles and performed a few OSTs, but their MVs generally get fewer than 10,000 views. I think his general style and vibe isn’t what I personally look for in a musician -- it’s a bit too “acoustic lite” -- but I bet a lot of people would like what he and his duo partner do, if people gave them a chance. 

His teaser performance, V37, was Missing You by BTOB (a song performed on Girls Planet 999, if it sounds familiar to you -- a member of BTOB is on this show's judging panel). It started off really nasal, but got a bit better as it went along. He strained a bit on the high notes, unfortunately. It wasn’t the best performance, but I’m not going to condemn him for 90 seconds of imperfect singing. I hope that as I see more from him, he gets to show more of what he can do.

Jeong Yoonseo

Jeong Yoonseo is a trainee, and little info is available about him. He’s V32, performing Starlight by Taeil. There are a lot of background vocals -- I think there’s a guide track behind him the whole time! -- so it’s hard to pick out his pure voice. It sounds nice from what I can hear.  That’s kind of all I got! (Side note -- I’ve seen his name listed as Jang, not Jeong, but if you read the hangul, it’s Jeong, so IDK.) 

Hong Seongjun

Seongjun is 24 and is (was?) a member of a group called BDC, a three member group under Brandnew Music that debuted in the latter end of the pandemic, in September 2020. All three members had been on ProduceX 101. Seongun himself was eliminated in 51st place. They put out several comebacks but never really caught on.

On their kprofiles page, it says “On August 18, 2023, BRANDNEW MUSIC officially announced that BDC will end all official promotions as artists under the company on August 26, 2023, after they mutually decided to end their contracts. Thereafter, the group have been active in Japan and have a fan meeting planned in Korea on December 3, 2023.” I’m not sure what to make of that, but it doesn’t sound great obviously. 

I went to check out their M/Vs and remembered that I had actually listened to Moon Rider for a few months there at some point. Pretty decent song, but it got only 3.6 million views. I think it’s just kind of tough for three member groups. 

He was V27 and sang a chipper acoustic little song by 10cm. For me, him having such heavy backup vocals for so much of the song kind of makes me wonder, why would you do that?  It’s the same thing as the situation with Yoonseo. Isn’t the point to show their vocals? That said, this was a pleasant enough performance -- clean and sweet, with decent agility in some of the runs -- but not something I’m dying to listen to over and over. I think he didn’t really understand the assignment and chose something that would be nice to perform with people watching you, instead of something to sing in the dark.

Jeong Inseong

Inseong is 29 and is main vocal of a group called KNK. 

He was V06, performing a song called Letting Go by Day6. I looked it up and this song came out on March 28, 2016 -- just a few weeks after Lim Junhyeok had to leave that group. It being called “Letting Go” is a bit… pointed. Kind of like when f(x) did a song called Four Walls as their first comeback (and last) as a four-member group. Anyway… I really liked this. I just wrote in my notes, “ooh, likey.” This is just so good, I don’t even know how to pick it apart. It’s just a combination of stellar technique and smooth natural vocal color. He does have to go into falsetto to hit a super high note, but he transitions almost instantly. This is good stuff. 

KNK debuted in 2016 as a 5 member group. They left their first agency in 2018 but continued as a group at a new agency, losing one member and gaining a new one. Over the last few years, two more members have quit and one more joined, leaving four in the group as of now. 

Their most recent single, Ride, came out in September 2020 and currently has about 1.7 million views on Youtube. It’s so easy to tell when Inseong is singing -- it’s like when Kihyun sings in MonstaX and you’re just like YES, come THROUGH. I threw Ride on my playlist just so I can hear more Inseong. 

Inseong has been in a bunch of music shows, and also participated in Mixnine, so he may know the other Mixnine contestants, Ma Jaekhyung from Romeo and Donghun from A.C.E. However, he had to withdraw early from the show, so maybe not. 

If you want more Inseong, here’s a fun duet he does with the “Korean Madonna,” Kim Wanseon. 

Taehwan

Taehwan, 30, is the leader and main vocalist of Vanner, and was V13, singing Goodbye by Park Hyo Shin. You probably know by now that I’m not much of a ballad girl, but at least this is sung simply, with a really warm, textured voice. He does sound really pinched on the higher notes, like his throat is closing, and he gets a bit nasal at times, as well. In my opinion, he lacks technique, but has a lot of natural talent. He also has a great smile. 

Vanner is a five member group that debuted in 2019. They had a lot of support as they debuted, and even got significant crowdfunding. They went on Peaktime, as did many other lesser known groups -- and they won! Good for Vanner. Their most recent EP charted very well overseas. Their song Performer, released five months ago, has 8.7 million views on Youtube, and their song Jackpot, released on Jan 30, 2024, already had almost 4 million views at the time of writing, an incredible performance for less than a week. So it looks like Vanner is really starting to take off.

Taehwan may have met Ma Jaekyung, Bitsaeon, and Hong Seongjun when they competed on Peak Time.

Ji Yeonwoo

Yeonwoo is another trainee I just don’t know much about. Apparently he went on a show called Wild Idol, which I haven’t seen. But I do know that his teaser song, V24, Suffer by Charlie Puth, was great. A great combination of a song I actually liked and a voice I really liked. He has great agility, leaping up into falsetto and back down again. He does get a bit pinched sometimes on higher notes, but for whatever reason, it doesn’t bother me. Maybe it’s just I’m so glad it’s not a ballad!

Ok, that’s enough for now. I’ll see you in the next one, when I tackle Team Soul, featuring everyone’s favorite. You know who I mean.

#bpr recaps build up #build up #mnet build up #jang intae #jeong yoonseo #vanner #m.o.n.t. #a.c.e. #cix #hong seongjun #BDC #jeong inseong #KNK #taehwan #ji yeonwoo #bitsaeon #suhwan #pentagon #yeo one

[britany1997]

Bands the modern Lost Boys would listen to

(Feel free to add your own Lost Boys music headcanons!)

David:

•Father John Misty- FJM writes music for male manipulators and people with religious trauma, of which I believe David is both. His favorite album is Fear Fun because it’s more centered on chaos and atheism, as opposed to FJM’s later albums which are more about love and himself. His favorite song is Fun Times In Babylon because it’s a song about good times in the Biblical archetype of an evil, hedonistic city and that sounds like a fun time to him. He also enjoys listening to You Can Do It Without Me, and God’s Favorite Customer because they feed his god complex. He loves that FJM sings quite a bit about smoking, sex, and death, all things David is totally down with.

•Radiohead- Also music for male manipulators. His favorite songs are Burn the Witch (ironically since the song is about a society plagued by paranoia, but in David’s case it’s not paranoia, he actually IS a supernatural evil creature), Karma Police (because everyone who messes with them WILL get what’s coming to them) and Paranoid Android. One time a guy on the boardwalk said to him, “oh you like Radiohead? Have you heard Creep?” And David ate him almost immediately.

Dwayne:

•Hozier- I just think Dwayne likes woodsy deep voice folk rock guys so he’d vibe with Hozier. Also I think he cares about female pleasure more than any of the other boys and so does Hozier. His favorite album is Hozier’s self-titled album and his favorite songs on the album are Work song, because of the promise of devotion and love from beyond the grave, Angel of Small Death and the Codeine Scene, because of the juxtaposition in the song between the pure and the cruel, and Arsonist’s Lullaby, specifically because of the lines “Don’t you ever tame your demons / But always keep them on a leach.” Unlike his chaotic brothers, Dwayne is a bit more calculating in his debauchery, like the main character of that song. He also enjoys NFWMB and Shrike and is eagerly awaiting Hozier’s new album.

•The War on Drugs- Listening to them almost makes Dwayne feel nostalgic for the 80s as The War on Drugs are the self-proclaimed rock n roll synthesists of the century (reminds him of the pre-Michael days🥲). His favorite album is A Deeper Understanding and his favorite song on the album is Pain, a song about losing a struggle against the darker side inside a person.

•Lord Huron- More woodsy folk rock. He’s a romantic at heart so he loves She Lit a Fire, Fool for Love, Ends of the Earth, and The Night we Met. His favorite song by Lord Huron is Meet Me in the Woods, especially the lines at the end: “Follow me into the endless night / I can bring your fears to life / Show me yours and I’ll show you mine / Meet me in the woods tonight.” There’s a strong possibility he’s quoted those lyrics to a meal

Paul:

•Greta Van Fleet- They’re like a modernized Led Zeppelin, they make him nostalgic. AND they’re four guys with cool jackets in a band together!!! Paul’s like, ‘guys they’re us:)’ He loves how the band’s albums flow and tell epic stories about worlds plagued by war, destruction, and waiting for peace. His favorite album is the Battle at Garden’s Gate, he likes the instrumentals better on that one and he thinks the vocals are more raw and throaty. His favorite song on that album is Stardust Chords, especially for the lines “Even sinners go to drink the wine / Break the bread” reminding him that even as an evil being, he’s still able to indulge in life and community. He also loves Highway Tune, a song about falling with a beautiful girl while driving on the highway (literally him on his motorcycle every night)

•Lady Gaga- Paul loves the Glam pop-rock of early Lady Gaga, he loves how revolutionary her music is for it’s time, and he appreciates her loud and unique style as well. Also, I HC that Paul is bi (he loves people and not genders, he just like me) and listening and dancing to Lady Gaga let’s him express and celebrate his sexuality! He sees no reason to hide who he is. He loves Poker Face, Born this Way and Monster

•I also think he listens to female rappers and R&B artists who are open with their sexuality and sexual pleasure like Janelle Monáe, FKA Twigs, Doja Cat, SZA, and Nicki Minaj he’s all for the sexual liberation of women in the modern era. Especially Janelle Monáe though for her songs about sexual expression and gender identity. Janelle has described herself as “a free ass motherfucker” and Paul vibes with that energy. He loves Americans, a song about subverting traditional American values in favor of loving people for who they are, I Like That, a song about sexuality and self-acceptance, and Make Me Feel, a song celebrating bisexuality. He also enjoys Django Jane, Pynk and Tightrope.

Marko:

•ALL pop-punk, all of it. But especially Fall Out Boy- He’s not a huge fan of MANIA but he loves the other albums, especially the older stuff. His favorite album is Save Rock And Roll the instrumentals of the songs on that album are his favorite AND Elton John and Courtney Love are featured on the album and he loves them both. His favorite song on the album is Death Valley. He likes their older stuff as well like Sugar We’re Goin Down (he doesn’t care that people think it’s overplayed, it’s a banger) Of All the Gin Joints In The World, Fame < Infamy, and Immortals (for obvious reasons)

•Tally Hall- He’s like, a band that writes songs about existential chaos? Sign him the fuck up. He loves Ruler of Everything, he finds it sort of ironic because the song is about the frivolity of life and inevitability of death, yet for him, death is not inevitable. He also loves Cannibal (obviously) it’s a metaphor for the singer, it is NOT a metaphor for him >:) and Turn the Lights Off, especially the lines “Everybody wants to get evil tonight / But all good devils masquerade under the light.” Marko has the face of an Angel, but is usually depicted as the most brutal of the boys, he literally is a devil that masquerades under the light.

Bonus: All the boys listen to the Killers, for their grunge rock music (their favorite songs are On Top, Glamorous Indie Rock and Roll, and The Man), Muse for their anti-government rock (Their favorites are Uprising, Supermassive Black Hole, and Resistance) and Thrice for the woodsy rock (Their favorite songs are Black Honey, Blood on Blood, and Beyond the Pines). And of course, they listen to all the same bands they listened to in the 80s as well: Mötley Crüe, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Van Halen, Echo & the Bunnymen, Metallica, etc…

#david lost boys #dwayne lost boys #marko lost boys #paul lost boys #lost boys headcanons #the lost boys #tlb #tlb 1987 #the lost boys 1987

[ihatemyselfandwanttodiexxx]

Faith Seed x reader

Basically what this is

So I want to smoke weed with faith, and yes I'm high rn so this may be peak of my writing capabilities lmaoo also reader hasn't smoked with faith yet so you just hang out with her

You lay on the bed bored and Faith walks over to you and greets you by saying "hey sweetie! I'm home for a while so what do you want to do?" You grinned and asked her "I have some weed, so do you want to smoke?" The blondes face lights up and she says "can we hang out in the car and stop by the store and park by dead man's river!?" You laugh and reply "yeah, babe we can do whatever you want, put something other than that dress on so the resistance doesn't think you're going to hurt them" she runs to her closet, mostly full of band shirts that she stole from you and your hoodies a few minutes later she walked out wearing a (favorite band) shirt, jeans, and one of your hoodies wrapped around her waist, of course your clothes are oversized on her, but she loved them and you love seeing her happy. You grabbed your phone, weed, and speaker and went to the car you got into the driver seat and drove to a gas station and you both got out of the car you sent her to get snacks, and you got (favorite drink) and her favorite drink Faith walked up to you with her arms full of your and hers favorite candies and chips. You put walked to the front and bought your items, then went to the car driving to the river you pulled out your speaker and your Spotify to play some music, then got your bowl out. You both smoked in the back seat under a blanket you were both stoned and when her favorite songs came up she pulled you out of the car to dance (pick one of these bc they're amazing) STORY CONTINUES ⬇️

You held Faith with your arms around her waist and her arms were around your neck, slow dancing next to the body of water, falling in love all over again, you stared into her eyes and thought about how lucky you are to have her and pulled her in closer, telling her how much you appreciate her and you pulled her into a slow kiss, just savoring this moment in your mind, she sat down in the grass, and ate a handful of candy, you knew some people would say that she's beautiful in her dress and when she's all dolled up, but you love this, her wearing your clothes smiling and listening to amazing music, you love her, and always will, you'd never do anything to hurt her and will destroy anyone who does, you may not believe in edens gate, but you joined for her and will stay unless she wants to leave, you ask her to go into the car and she does, you and her sit together and start making out under a blanket music still blasting, you were both content the weed enhanced the euphoria you both felt, you wished this moment could last forever.

Hi people, I am so so sorry I haven't posted fics in a while I've just had life stuff and my ex girlfriend was a cheating hoe so yeah sorry bros but requests open please send some

#far cry 5 x reader #faith seed #weedsociety #lgbtq #fan fiction #fluff #spotify #x reader #gender neutral reader #i want this #coping #cars #make out #my love #faith seed x reader

[barbielvr]

Diluc Ragvindr Singer/band AU HC

An: I was listening to "Creep" by Radiohead and couldn't help but notice how similar Diluc and Thom Yorke (the lead singer of Radiohead) sounds. Fanfic authors pls write something about this if you're interested and please don't forget to tag me in your works ;)) This is based from the meaning of song lyrics. Grammatical errors ahead. This is my first time writing so any criticism is completely welcome here!

This is gender neutral reader

TW: slight yandere! Diluc, creepy Diluc, insecure Diluc, mentions of Diluc making the reader creeped out. let me know if I missed any tw

This is the music if anyone wants to listen while reading.

So imagine Diluc singing about him being head over heels to reader. Admiring reader and describing how the reader is so angelic and special. Also, Diluc wishes he were as special as the reader but gets hit with the realization that he can't because he is an outcast, an outsider, a creep, and a weirdo who can't get along with everyone and has no friends. Even though it hurts, he can't help but wish he is perfect so the reader would finally notice and like him. He wants them to remember him even when he is not around. But in reality, the reader wants nothing to do with him, and the reader is creeped out by him and stays away from Diluc. Diluc might have done something to the reader that made them uneasy and ran away from him, making Diluc remember that he is a weirdo and a creep; he was never normal from the beginning.

#diluc x reader #diluc ragvindr x reader #yandere diluc ragvindr #genshin x reader #diluc headcanons #diluc ragnvindr

[barthel]

Radiohead, "Creep" (Live in Oxford, 2001)

As a band, Radiohead has always been legible. They tell you how to think about them: what their story is, what their music means. And if you were a Radiohead fan in the 90's, you knew they hated their first hit, "Creep." You knew this because they told you, but also because they made a series of albums that were aggressively the opposite of "Creep"'s anglo-grunge angst; because tour documentary Meeting People is Easy made clear their disgust with the kind of mindless fame a song like "Creep" engendered. "I want to have control," Thom had sung in the song, and now they were taking control of their narrative. They wanted to be smart, and "Creep" was not smart.

The problem was, if you were a Radiohead fan in the 90's, you yourself probably loved "Creep." When I first heard the song, I was just the kind of teen to feel that crunchy angst deep in my soul, and even as I went to college and wanted to seem smart and do smart things myself (OK Computer, Kid A, and Amnesiac are all very "I went to college" sort of albums), every moment of "Creep," from its chiming beginning to its jet-takeoff chorus to its transparent self-loathing, was a blast. My gross teenage soul felt seen. And anyway, wasn't Radiohead's rejection of the song exactly the kind of self-loathing that "Creep" itself had managed to capture so perfectly? I was a creep, I was a weirdo; what the hell were we doing there? Let's not do that again, guys. Come on.

After college, I spent a lot of time online arguing with past versions of myself. I was  embarrassed about the college-age Radiohead superfan who'd spent hours decoding the band's inscrutable website updates, convinced that they contained some galaxy-brain higher message, some greater masterpiece. When In Rainbows came out, given away at the band's website for whatever you wished to pay, the fan narrative became that Radiohead had boldly pioneered a new economic model that would save the music industry. But by that point, I'd become knowledgeable enough about both music and the music industry that I could smugly point out to you the many ways in which that was wrong. (And, even today, I can do a solid 7 minutes on how In Rainbows devalued digital music.) I didn't listen to the album for years, even though, when I did, I liked it well enough. Your old self can get in your head, can become a region on your internal map filled with sea dragons and smoke. Don't go here. 

When you're in your 40's, like I am now, you can't just react to your last identity; you have too many to choose from. It's easier to look back with regret on the many old selves you've lost than to boldly forge a new identity opposed to your last one. I was a writer for a couple decades, then got a professional job that didn't allow me to write. Since leaving it, I've been trying to put my writer-self back together, but in assembling my last bio, I noted that many of my publications were in outlets that no longer exist. It's easy to fall into regret; to feel illegible, your self-perception out of sync with how others see you. You can't afford these arguments with your past self anymore. You have to find a way to embrace them.

In 2001, after releasing Amnesiac, Radiohead played a triumphant homecoming gig in Oxford, where they'd all met at university. (Like I said: a very "I went to college" band.) At that point, they hadn't played "Creep" in four years, even as they'd put out two confirmed masterpieces, and all signs pointed to them never playing the song again. They weren't planning on playing it that day, either. At the end of their final encore, they began to play "Motion Picture Soundtrack," the bleak love song that closes "Kid A." It was written around the same time as "Creep," but where "Creep" is easily legible, guitars and lyrics united in message, "MPS" pushes against itself, a cozy organ contrasting harshly with Thom Yorke's declaration that he'll never be with the object of his desire, and will only "see you in the next life."  But the crowd wouldn't hear MPS that day. The band flubbed the intro, and instead of starting again, Thom says, "Okay, I've got a better idea. This is a slightly older song."

As the first note of "Creep" hits, a sound erupts from the crowd: not just a cheer, not just a scream, but the clearest expression of release I've ever heard. It is a true surprise, a fulfillment of their heart's desire; one diehard Radiohead fans never expected to happen, or at least not that day. They sing along to every word. And the band shows no signs of the embarrassment they'd felt so strongly for the song since releasing OK Computer. Jonny launches into the first roaring chord of the chorus audibly out of tune, and you can hear a moment of hesitancy, the old embarrassment threatening to creep in, before he gives in to the song's pull. Thom sings it with a gleeful lightness. It's a reunion, a band realizing, in a flash, that they've had enough distance from their past self to love them again. You need that distance, need to see your earlier selves were right, or at least not wrong; not smart, maybe, but maybe smart isn't what really matters. Maybe what really matters isn't being smart or right but that feeling, that release, the crowd and the band together, in perfect purpose, deciding to love the sound itself and its adored history rather than the barren meaning of the words. The explicit legibility slips away into something richer and more complex, and together, they find joy in having made it far enough from that angst to view it with affection.

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