#maybe she will write me a reference???

[tellme-o-muse]

I FINISHED PIANO AND MY TEACHER SAID SHE WAS PROUD OF ME, AND I AM IMPROVING WELL, AND WAS MIGHTILY IMPRESSED SINCE THIS IS GRADE EIGHT I’M WORKING ON! I was so stunned that I just beamed and soaked in her praise. She even said in amazement: “How is your sight reading so good??” BEST piano lesson ever. Twelve year old me would have been so proud.

#piano lessons #piano #I credit this achievement to falling in love with Donna Tartt #And classics #And classical music as a whole #So I’ve been listening to beyond grade eight piano music and you wouldn’t believe how easy my grade eight pieces seem #Ahhhhhhhh #thing is I disliked and feared my piano teacher for her strictness #My sister dropped out grade 3 #BUT NOW WE HAVE AN AMICABLE RELATIONSHIP #maybe she will write me a reference??? #Pretty please #and AND AND AND she said that I should perform in a festival for her #It sounds scary #But I gotta get my playing in public skills up yk? #And I realised recently that piano is something I want to do for the rest of my life :’)) #Gotta put much effort into it #And grow while I’m still being taught #And then I can play!!! Ahhhhhhhhh #Best ever!!! AHHHHHHHHHH

[bolithesenate]

okay no, I got bored halfway through lining and just slapped some color on these bitches

Je'Chessa is a Temple Guard, but not from Feemor's squad (and coincidentally the owner of the foulest mouth in all of Coruscant)

Uzemgo is one of the most accomplished Mandalorian poets of his time. He is the one that coins 'Mesh'lanovaar' as the mando'a word for the Temple Guard

and the little blue blob on his shoulder is his child, Toya.

#je'chessa stems from the idea of a jedi that is an absolute barbie until she opens her mouth #you would not believe how viciously this woman can swear #she's won contests #also did i spend entirely too much time writing 'sa sarad' in cursive mando'a for uzemgo's armor? maybe #he might as well be my self insert in this with the amount of fucking thoughts i have on mando poetry #random boli thoughts #my art #art for my fic #mando oc #jedi oc #jedi temple guard #once again i was too lazy to look up guard uniform references #sue me

[only-lonely-www]

Joining the war on vampires on the side of the vampires

#bungou stray dogs #bsd bram #I’m a big fan of Dracula (the book) so Imma spill my theories here #(spoiler alert: they have next to nothing to do with the book) #anyways I bet his daughter was named something goofy like Mina #if we can have Naomi and Gin I don’t see why she couldn’t also be named after a book character #also considering irl Bram worked at a theater/as a play critic #do you think that’s why bsd Bram likes music so much #and craves entertainment #speaking of which Dracula is very much about defeating an old evil with new technology #so maybe that’s why technology played such a big role in him switching sides #doubt it but it could be #anyway off topic but I bet Fyodor’s freak out is a reference to irl Dostoyevsky’s epilepsy #and in turn Raskolnikov’s nervous breakdowns #also Rodya did write a whole essay about how he believes there are certain chosen people who are above the law #and those people have the right to punish others by murder if necessary #which seems to be a sentiment bsd Fyodor also agrees with #along with maybe that possibly being an aspect of his ability #who knows! not me #sorry for the long tags bye

[grammarpedant]

Ahhhh now that I've gotten used to the idea of gaming on my new PC I'm so back on my Armored Core bullshit. i wanna make mechs to go wow cool robot at soo bad. wanna make a sleek sexy white-on-gunmetal mech. wanna make a golden knight mech. wanna make a mensah pile bunker mech. wanna make a fast bastard mech and go screaming like a missile across the battlefield with bloodlust in my systems. wanna strike a pose over my enemies' sparking corpses and villain-rant about how they disappointed me in my endless quest for a better fight. uarrgjjghh mechs they are so Gender to me mechs are everything to me

the gaming stars haven't quite aligned yet, though. in the meantime I'm just thinking about how the NG++ ending went pretty hard but it could've gone even harder for me personally if it had had more brainsyncing between the protag and Ayre. i love that shit i eat it up with a spoon. they should've cyborg mindmelded into a single working whole so intimate that it becomes irrelevant where one person stops and the other starts, so much better and more powerful together than apart, united by the singular purpose of beating the ass of the other shitty post-human hivemind in the room, thus showing how the true potential for humanity's future lies in trust and equal partnership and not in Allmind's (or walter's) exploitation and control. Ayre should've BECOME the mech, alongside us the player, is what I'm saying. make it more Gundam.

it's a concept that honestly probably doesn't work too well for the video game as-is, but hey that's what fic is for. maybe I'll write it someday.

#Mensah is ayda mensah from the Murderbot Diaries and the pile bunker is a reference to the mining drill she used to kill a secunit in ASR #the golden knight is Paragon my oc #and robots that are white armor on black/gunmetal are soooo hot to me. yowza 👀 #I'll maybe write the brain syncing thing someday #also Rusty becoming a Gundam-esque newtype ghost by imprinting into the Coral as a C-wave mutation when he dies to walter #verso talks #Armored Core #guess who also just watched gundam: narrative and went wow cool gundam show #queue

[crown-ov-horns]

I know this is from Constantine (I think), but the character design so gives fem!Crowley

She especially makes me think of Lady Crowley in my ideas, because not only is she incredibly beautiful, there's this fierceness to her, and a hurt in her eyes. Her stare could both be the Queen of Hell, and a survivor who eventually grows her claws.

I also think of fem!Crowley when I look at her (a character who briefly appears in Medici: Masters of Florence), just make the outfit black...

#good omens #crowley #fem!crowley #good omens fandom #diary pages #faceclaim #megan west #miriam leone #writing diaries #references #fic reference #lady crowley #seriously that constantine character is... even the yellow eyes! #yes she looks very young compared to david and maybe could have sharper features #but works for me #bianca no kidding looks like a female version of crowley

[nuclearspring]

don't know if i'm going to get much writing done today because i'm exhausted but have a lazy sketch of betty

#ooc. #did not deviate from the reference at all rly which has me thinking about her in the kings #trying to remember if she ever did join the kings but i think she would find the idea sort of useless LMFAO. idts #maybe in this non courier verse. i have yet to write that bio #stylistically AT LEAST tho. shes like yes . #f a s h i o n

[sunnykeysmash]

Dee's the writer and director... stepping into the leader position she naturally gravitates towards... she's casting the roles. She cast wrong in dee day, but this will change.

She always wanted the lead role before, which got in-between mac and dennis, but if she steps back (behind the scenes), she won't be their buffer anymore and then...

I rewatched aluminum monster vs fatty magoo and noticed how bad mac is at being controlling and manipulative (he follows exactly what frank says, doing things that he's still trying to apply to this day, like announcing dennis' announcement), how dennis can only ever see himself as filling the role perfectly, and how dee naturally stages a strike and everyone listens to her.

I also rewatched gets held hostage and noticed how it heavily features frank's will and how his gun saves the day, both elements that are coming back in tandem in ep2 of s16... and hostage is a very interesting ep in analyzing the group dynamics and how they interact with each or betray each other. It's also like... its talk of stockholm syndrome, because due to dee's monologue I feel like "why are you doing this to me?" will be a theme, in s16. Because it's like... well ok, no only is it also in gets whacked p2, but it implies that you fell in love with the other person because they did something to you...

look, I'm being rambly (as usual), but what I'm saying is that I feel like s16 will pull a lot from s3 specifically... I guess we will see more clearly when it airs, but I wanted to put it out there. It's not just THAT season tho there's like, season 9 too. and 14.

#iasip #s16 spoilers #it's always sunny in philadelphia #always sunny #bro i dont know where i was going with this... im writing analysis posts like they're journal entries lmaoo #and also like forgive me for this lol but i feel like they're using liam and ryan to parallel macdennis a bunch but especially in hostage #i feel like theyre the data jumper refers to when it comes to like. having a gay couple on the show???? cuz like. well yk. it is what it is #and now they're in the bowling episode saying mixing things is strictly prohibited idk maybe im seeing things but mayb not anyways #yea um no comment. this isnt my most coherent post #i like the part abt how dee isnt gonna be between mac and dens' story anymore tho looking to be the lead bc shes STEPPING BACK from actress #to control it from behind the scenes like a director #which will leave mac and den without a third wheel..... damn. dee is the wildcard huh? #i really sincerely hope we have the whole gang scheming mac and dennis shit behind their backs in s16 #like thats hilarious come on #and they all have different goals and methods in mind and dennis is like the lil lab rat unaware victim of it all #then the veil is pulled and BAM!!!! the gang broke dennis. it's genius

[itissadbutitsmy-artblog]

i think brain wizard just likes to hear him talk. it's not like hes gonna be talking much after they do what they want to do to him :) half spaders teachers want to turn him into a god i think hes gonna pick up on it cuz i dont think they can act normal around him

#yes i went and checked they have transfiguration fourth period #idk what the fuck he has written on the blackboard #give me the stupid little school drama we deserve. (i realize spader was in school for One Day before kicking the bucket) #bw was in that episode for like 0.5 minutes and died also but i think hes funny and horrible so i think about him a lot #didnt look at a reference for him btu i did look up what period they had his class. priorities #he doesnt show up during their class sequence so idk. i wouldnt have seen him. #probably just sitting in the back going ah. <3 two spaders. #ANYWAYS #adventure time #distant lands #digital #spader #blaine #brain wizard #and a bunhc of other students. larrys there. roots guy. #peps even there #not cadebra because she Skips Class. maybe spader should skip with her. #different teachers show it in different ways. bufo doesnt show it Atall but he does write Love; Spader in the fake runaway note #like. 'i totatlllyyyy know my student. he uh. uh. well he totally likes me and my class a lot. so.' #i have got to stop talking. #'i dont think they can act normal around him' i saw him and potable wizard talking. EYYY SPADER MY BEST FRIEND SPADERRRR cmon.

[designernishiki]

as much as a i understand and respect ace kiryu truthers, i really feel like kiryu is the type to really take the idea to heart that sex is something vulnerable and meaningful and thus reserved for someone completely trusted and special to him– someone who feels right. after years and years he’s still never legitimately voluntarily slept with someone, always tries to turn women away or is at least apathetic when they try to get physical with him, never feels that deep and specific bond with a woman– nothing compared to some of his bonds with other men throughout his life. and maybe, hopefully, one day it’ll hit him that there’s a pretty big, glaring reason why no women have ever felt “right” to him.

#I’ve become a pretty devout gay kiryu trigger at this point #it just. makes the most narrative sense / is the most narratively interesting / explains So Much #kiryu #yakuza #kazuma kiryu #honest to god though it’s. the most realistic way of explaining why he jumps to the assumption that he must date or kiss a woman or whatever #as soon as possible with little to no room to actually fall for one #with yumi he’s literally in the classic comp het situation of ‘well someone told me I’m in love with her so I guess I’m in love with her’ #no deeper thought no proof of falling for her etc #sayama’s more convincing and they start out actually building a dynamic that could end up being romantic maybe- but then they fucking jump #the gun and have kiryu randomly kiss her like something he saw in a movie instead of. you know. talking about things first. or anything. #partly because they’re in a life or death situation and are essentially pushed together via traumabonding #and that’s Extreme when it comes to the end of kiwami 2. honestly that makeout scene was just. really weird and uncomfortable. for multiple #reasons. I mean for one he says something like ‘I’m sure she (haruka)’ll understand’ in between the making out in reference to him not #even trying to get further from the bomb or anything #and just lowkey choosing to kill himself (disturbingly similarly to nishiki mind you) like uh kiryu did you forget that haruka. literally #lost her mother in an extremely similar situation. in front of her. and nearly lost you at the same time. kiryu’s personality is Not one to #just shrug off something like that- either he was purposefully choosing to kill himself because he felt like a failure and that haruka would #genuinely be better off without him Or the writing there was INSANELY out of character as to make him seem more focused on the supposed #Romeo and Juliet tragic romance situation than saving his daughter the grief of losing EVERYONE CLOSE TO HER and reliving the worst night of #her fucking Life #god if anything the ending of yk2 just screams ‘this relationship would not work out under normal circumstances and both of them are just #clinging onto whatever’s closest out of desperation and need for any kind of emotional catharsis available’ #if you can compare a pairing to romeo and juliet . it’s probably not #a pairing that’s meant to be #sorry im going off on a huge tangent about how weird the ending of yk2 was to me uhhh anyway I could write a video essay on why kiryu being #gay is the most realistic and interesting interpretation of him possible . send tweet

[teufelme]

You ever just want to talk about Bertl,

#i . ooc . #The tags got so long just warning U now! #OK I know his appearance wasn't the longest but like. I'll never stop talking about him because he doesn't get enough credit? rip. #I know it's not really relevant any more because post-timeskip everyone is a lot better but. Referring to everyone's skill as of pre. #Reiner said Bertolt was the strongest of all of the shifters but he held himself back. He came 3rd without giving his all. Or really trying #I hc he held himself back to try not to let too much of his strength show bc people forget he had military training b4 joining the 104th. #And ofc. Also to not bring too much attention to himself bc of who he really is??? #The way he mastered his Titan straight away and also has such a good handle on it. #Out of the 3 shifters he was the one that stayed true to the mission. Despite his reluctance he's got the strength and commitment. #People are so quick to say he relies on Reiner too much. And while he does at times. Reiner relies on him just as much if not more. Even if #Reiner doesn't realise it. Bertolt keeps him on track and has no one supporting him at all. #In COTT arc... U see him dodge Mikasa who is an Ackerman and seen as one of the strongest characters in the series... #And the same in RTS. Everyone gets too distracted by Mikasa to actually pay attention to how he dodges her 4 times?? Even tho she attacks #from behind? And the way he lands a hit on her. I just *screams*. I love how many times she tries to kill him. lol #How effective he is when he abandons his guilt and this is sort of irrelevant but. It's so special to me because as someone who is #a quiet person irl round people I don't know well. Who has it brought up a lot. I just adore when a character that remains in the #background just comes out and says enough is so hhhhh I know his reasons aren't good BUT RTS BERT... AH. #Also gotta talk about his marksmanship skills in a thread at some point?? Maybe Mp bert I J UST.. #Anyway I might do a cheeky revamp of graphics n icons and that. Dunno yet. Need to actually write that'd be good lol. #This account is a lovebot didn't U know.

[secretmellowblog]

Random, but. It’s fascinating how “Valjean and Javert written by someone who thinks cops are Good” is so radically different from “Valjean and Javert written by someone who thinks cops are Bad.”

Like, for me the number one Thing that will determine whether I enjoy someone’s take on Valjean and Javert are whether they realize that the police/prison as an institution destroyed both of their lives, and is the villain of both of their stories XD.

But yeah it’s really fascinating! Both in adaptations and in fanfiction, the tone/interpretation with which the plot beats are handled can change so much about the characterization. All the adaptations/fic start off with the same basic plot beats but so much can be changed and colored (for better or worse) by the way the author chooses to interpret them

#i do want to say that I always think more people in the fandom is fun! #and fanfic is supposed to be whatever self indulgent stuff scratches your id and can’t be held to the same standards as published stuff #I will never tell people what to write! #also I’ve got cringe fanfic on ao3 too (let he who is without cringe cast the first stone etc etc) #so I’d be the WORST person to preach about that XD #(the next part in the tags is a joke don’t come at me) #but— as a lighthearted joke— sometimes to me personally the Les mis fandom feels like #imagine if you’re in the fandom for the new she ra show #and the show’s about the Evil Horde and how it destroys the lives of the two main characters in different ways #but then like? half the fandom insisted on referring to it as the Morally Okay Reformable Horde #and then like. all the catra/adora fanfic ended with Catra realizing she needs to be a Nicer horde soldier #and maybe adora rejoins the horde to and they go off to fight for Justice (which is what the horde does) #and then you were like ‘huh that’s a bit odd’ #‘I thought the point was that the horde poisoned both of their lives and ripped them away from their friends/family’ #‘like I thought the evil horde was evil and stuff’ #and people responded to you ‘why do you hate catra and catradora?’ #and you were like ‘no I love catra! but I thought the whole point was that yknow. she kinda had to leave the evil horde and all’ #‘like her upbringing in the horde had left her with a violent self-destructive authoritarian worldview and all’ #‘and her obsession with being a good horde soldier was not indeed a good admirable thing but sorta pathetic and sad’ #‘and adora was right to leave and hate the horde for what it did to her’ #‘and her flaw was that (like catra) she still internalized a lot of the way it taught her to view herself’ #‘and the whole fun of catradora is the idea of the two of them sorta finally figuring out who they are outside of that abusive system’ #anyway in this metaphor catra is javert adora is Valjean the horde is the police catradora Is valvert XD #this is a goofy metaphor made after hours of homework and is not to be taken too seriously

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

she is THE time machine <3

#i was looking for what time machine is in french and when i put machine temporelle into google dutch wikipedia came up #which is funny bc this page doesnt even exist in french? #but theres also some physics article from 2017 that uses machine temporelle so im gonna assume it's a real word #and use it #bc im not using 'machine à voyager dans le temps' im sorry #it's good for my word count maybe but can you imagine if they had to say all that every time? #i like french a lot but i dont like how many words it uses to say anything #french is like why use 1 word when 4 will do #just make up some words im begging you all this circumlocution is making me nuts #it doesnt gel with my writing style At All #missy voice: im cutting to the chase babey im streamlining im saving us a c t u a l minutes #missy when she needs to say 'machine à voyager dans le temps' every time: okay so we're not doing that #ursula voice: im a very busy lady and i havent got all day #missy writing a letter to the academie français: im a TIME LADY. do you udnerstand #do you understand how using a minimum of 6 SIX words every time i refer to my vehicle is funnily enough a waste of my time? #im sure we can do something about this #and if not im sure your successor can <3

[theygender]

This has been on my mind for weeks and I talked to my therapist about it today and told my girlfriend about it too so now it's time for me to update the gay people in my phone: I may have schizotypal personality disorder

#this is like the equivalent of telling the bees to me #rambling #like ive been thinking about ever since i learned that autism shares a lot of similarities with schizophrenia and looked into that #and then learned about negative/cognitive symptoms and realized i related a lot to them #and then i learned more about schizotypal personality disorder and it was fuckin scary how much i related to it #what with the magical thinking and the severe social anxiety that doesnt go away when i get to know someone #and the ideas of reference and the eccentricity and the communication difficulties and the strange thought patterns #and then i specifically learned about avolition as a negative symptom which describes the exact thing thats ruining my life rn #and. i was scared to talk to my therapist about it bc i was worried it could be used against me somehow #but it was good to talk it out with her and get some additional perspective on whats going on in my brain #and if it means i could maybe possibly work on fixing the avolition and the social anxiety (my two biggest issues for years) #then it would be 100% worth it tbh. and its also kind of helpful to have some sort of framework to understand whats happening in my brain #funnily enough when i told my girlfriend (who was previously mis?diagnosed with schizophrenia and considering autism) #about it she related a lot too. so i guess we'll see how that goes #its. crazy how much of an overlap there is between schizospec orders and autism #i feel like i might should write up a post going into detail about different schizospec disorders to raise awareness #bc like. it is so much more than just hallucinations and delusions #in fact its not even required to have both of those for any schizospec disorder. some only require one and others dont require either #there is so much to the schizophrenic spectrum that i was unaware of and I'm sure that's probably true of other people too

[darling-gemini]

I wish I had some original thoughts about ttpd right now but I fear I will have to sit with this one for a while

#its growing on me but it's far from my favorite album of hers #i can appreciate and acknowledge the artistic value of it but i just don't know if this one's for me??? #in a lot of ways i feel like im on the other side of it #in the sense that the things i went through in the last few years are... in some ways like Taylor but mostly like the ppl shes writing about #mostly in relation to the drug references tbh #i was also the one who hurt people even though i was also hurt #idk im just not relating to it in the way that I've found myself able to do w her other albums #which is fine like genuinely im not saying that her art needs to be hashtag relatable to be enjoyed and delved into #it's just. idk. maybe it'll come with time #personal

[karsite-grip]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SOLIDER!!!!!

#screaming crying #i'm so glad it's jaheira and karlach who spoke up #that is their mom and their girlfriend. hello #what a beautiful moment #you have a birthday now!! 7 marpenoth baby!!!! #oc baelfire #i am. so emotionally attached to this durge #i stopped playing this save for a month bc i wanted to write fic of the night after they killed gortash #but i decided i'll just finish & take a lot of pictures #maybe screenrecord though it's laggy #just so i have references #i just have not had the brain power for any serious writing #but hopefully soon #god this line genuinely made me tear up. happy birthday soldier augh #what if baelfire was willing to die then #finally understanding karlach's choice to die in faerun rather than go back to the hells #& knowing that she won't have much more time left herself but maybe this is how it must be #they will die together and save baldurs gate in the process. and in death they will be free #but baelfire gets a second chance. why not karlach? she deserves it more #and what's the point of living if they can't spend the rest of their life with her #durge #the dark urge spoilers

[bluesidedown]

why are emails so

#asking people to be references is the worst thing maybe #frankly i need someone (keendaanmaa) to sit on me while i write this email and tell me that it doesn't sound stupid. #unfortunately she worked her last of four 12 hour nights last night so.