#meaning Louis better have another great year this year
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What are the lucky numbers for 2023??
🐇 3 6 & 9!
🐇 Full vid x
#2023#369#year of the rabbit#meaning Louis better have another great year this year#lucky number#Louis Tomlinson#mine
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hiii so i have a request! Could you do one like still in harry's 1d days. So like y/n is louis sister and she has been friends with the band since the beginning and harry has been in love with her since he first laid eyes on her and all that. But he never told her because she always had a bf but those bfs would never treat her right like always ignoring her and flirting with other girls so harry kept this like journal where he wrote how in love he is with y/n and how he would treat her right, how he know everything about her all the little things and how no one could love her as much as he does. So then one day like during prince hair harry her and harry are sharing a hotel room with seperate beds (ofc haha, but because they have always been best friends) and y/n finds this journal and like reads all the things he has written and then she goes to him and is like "well, if i didnt know any better i would say mr styles has a crush on me" and he gets all nervous and says that it isnt just a crush and he is in love and that and then he asks "will you be my girlfriend. I cant' go another day of not kissing you, hugging you, touching you I cant stand you not being mine" and y/n finds it very sweet but she is very insecure and kind of rejects him in a nice way because she feel they will critisise her because they expect harry to be w a model and gorgeous girl and harry is tells her how beautiful she is and how he feel in love the moment they met and how it didnt matter what the world thought because no one can love her like he can and he know eveything about her so he asks again "will you let me be your boyfriend" and she finally agrees and then he holds her close and protectively and then y/n starts tearing up and says sorry because she was being silly and he says "dont be. Its not silly, baby. I'll be her to wipe every tear and to comfort you. Your heart is safe here, you are safe with me, my love" and then how they spend the first night together because well they share a hotel room and then the morning after harry saying how happy he is and how he has always dreamed about it and then they meet with the boys and tell em the news and they are all very happy and are like "about time" and yeah hope you understand it thank you again so much it would be great i feel its so cute! <3
Does he know?
OMGOMG THANK YOU FOR THISS!! the detail you put in and the image it painted in my head AHHH❤️
I’m so sorry this has taken so long!! I really wanted this to be perfect!! 🌷 but thank you for your patience It means the world x
Warnings: jealousy, mentions of toxic relationships, cussing, smutty themes if you squint, pent up emotions.
— — — — — — —
— early 2013 —
Harry’s fingers held a ballpoint pen between his fingers, the lined paper sat empty on the table adjacent to him.
There new album ‘midnight memories’ was due mid November of this year, he loved his job but these deadlines took the piss.
‘Fuck’ he whispered to himself, he didn’t realise the clock had gone over midnight.
The shared tourbus was at a halt for the night the rest of the four boys remained in there bunk and no one heard a peep from them through the rest of the night.
“Y’alright H?” Y/n said Peeling the curtain that separated the bunks to the lounging area of the bus, and pulling it back behind her.
“Sorry y/n, did i wake you?” He quietly asked, dropping his pen instantly.
He would be lying if he said he didn’t have a crush on y/n, she was also the youngest of the Tomlinson family so her and Harry grew up together at the same time and age, hitting each milestone and big birthdays together.
“No, no not at all” she waved, sitting on the sofa next to his.
“What y’doing awake still?” She asked, taking a sip of her water.
“Tryna get song ideas, getting absolutely nowhere” he said, crossing his arms back and leaning back on the cushions.
“What are you doing awake? He smirked.
“Can’t sleep, excited for tomorrow” she smiles.
“Haven’t seen you all on stage for a while” she added.
They sat and spoke for awhile, what y/n was oblivious of is how many ideas he was racking up watching her.
She reached her arm out to grab her water bottle, her wrist was exposed from her hoodie sleeve for a second, what Harry didn’t expect was to see an inky drawing.
“Is that a tattoo?” He asked.
“Oh this?” She askers pulling her hoodie up her arm.
“Yeah, me and Louis got matching a few days ago, a random spontaneous idea that popped into our heads” she laughed repressing the day her and her older brother got matching ‘28’ tats.
“It’s funny because ben, hasn’t even noticed it, and it’s like our 4th month together” y/n mentioned, a slight frown forming on her face.
Harry’s heart teared a tiny bit, she was still with this ‘Ben’ it was clear none of the boys got on with him, he wasn’t the bestest of boyfriend.
“Really?” He asked, eyes widening.
“Mmhmm, don’t know what to do about this whole Situation-ship thing”
“Well, do you love him?” He asked, fiddling with the hem of his band tee.
“I can’t say I do Harry” she sighed, “but there’s a part of me that feels bad” she added.
“Don’t feel bad, if it’s not meant to be, s’not meant to be”
All y/n wanted to do was scream out her attraction to him, something clicked in, the soft and gentle words he spoke, the way he still looked good at 1am after a busy day, the way he made a band tee look like piece of designer. Y/n wasn’t sure what happened.
Y/n soon enough found herself back in her bunk, trying to push down her sudden butterflies, hoping it’s just a 1am sleepy thought, the last thing she wants is to thirst over her brothers best friend.
When y/n and Harry exchanged there goodnights, he instantly got back to his paper.
‘Does he know’ he whispered.
‘Does he know’ he repeated.
‘Your secret tattoos?” He asked himself.
He instantly jotted these phrases to himself.
Harry tried to think to himself of the little things you do.
Maybe you could be his muse this time around?
—
It was 8:45am the next day the bus was off again at 5pm so for now they could relax.
Y/n believed she was alone on the bus, she thought the boys were out doing the coffee run, she thought wrong.
“But she doesn’t know who I am, and she doesn’t give a damn about me” she sang whole continuing to organise her suitcase on her bunk.
As the beats of ‘teenage dirtbag’ continue, she moves her body to beat and sing.
“Cause I’m just a teenage dirtbag baaby” she sung.
“Y/n you may be a Tomlinson doesn’t mean you can sing like one though” he interrupted, almost kicking the tourbus door open and walking over to her bunk with her Starbucks in hand.
“Heeeey, I’m a lovely singer, it should be me selling out O2” she said with pride.
“She got you there tommo” Niall piped in walking in.
“See” she giggled.
“Thank you for this lou” she dragged taking a sip of her iced coffee.
“No problemo, me and and the lads are heading to the studio in a bit y’ can come if you want?” Louis offered sitting on his bunk opposite to y/n’s.
“Yeah will do” she answered.
At this point all boys were back on the bus enjoying some quality time together, but all Harry could think of was the remaining lyrics.
‘The songs that you sing when your all alone?’ He thought to himself, that’s a keeper.
——beginning of where we are 2014——
In past year y/n and Harry had become closer than ever, it’s was a night at the MSG, the boys opted on a hotel instead of the bus, to Louis’ dismay y/n and Harry were up for sharing a hotel.
“Neither of you better be doing anything” Louis called the opposite of the hotel door.
“Fuck sake lou, you can come in” she laughed, laying her head back on the hotel bed frame.
The door clicks open to see a wet head louis, who was still clad in his joggers and ‘the who’ tee.
“You nearly ready Harry!” He called, pulling his phone out and glancing the time.
“Yeah man” he said emerging from the bathroom.
“Have fun tonight guys” she called out as they both met each other at the door. “I’ll be sure to watch some shitty livestream of you all prancing about on stage” she laughed.
“Thanks love” Louis said rolling his eyes.
“See you y/n don’t get too lonely without us” Harry smirked flashing her a wink while adjusting his head scarf which kept his unruly curls at bay.
“Bye boys” she called as they slowly walked off and headed to the arena.
They had been gone about an hour and y/n knew they wouldn’t be back till maybe after midnight.
She decided to set down and get ready to stay in her bed and have a relaxed night.
When unpacking her bags and digging to find her favourite pyjamas she was sure she packed. A large ‘thump’ was heard the other side of the room.
“Shit” she jumped.
A relieved smile, when it was something falling out of Harry’s suitcase.
She turned her head and spotted a brown, leather notebook that was lying on the carpet by his bags.
Once y/n had picked out her pjs for the evening, she walked over to the bed she picked out in the hotel room.
She placed them down by her pillows and was about to reach out for her phone by the charging port until something about this note book, caught her eye, ‘one and only’ was scribed into the leather with black ink.
She knows she shouldn’t, she knows that not hers, that’s Harry’s, that’s his property not y/n’s but there was something pulling her in a feeling she couldn’t push down.
A shaky breath left her mouth as her fingers reached out towards the book in front of her.
She peeled back the smooth cover:
23rd of February 2013
Ben doesn’t know how lucky he is, such a smart, beautiful, caring woman, how could he take her for granted??.
Y/n’a heart was running a Marathon.
“No” she said louder than she anticipated.
She flicked to the next page:
28th February 2013
‘All of us were at the studio this evening I couldn’t stop staring at y/n, I feel terrible knowing it’s my best friends sister, but she is wonderful’
Her mind was now matching her palpitating heart, a million thoughts were being processed at that moment.
He really thought the same the whole time?
She quickly flicked another.
3rd of March 2013
Write a couple of songs for midnight memories is it bad to say there all inspired by one person.
If she was mine she wouldn’t be ignored or treated terribly, I hope Louis talks to her about this Ben.
Y/n did agree with this statement getting rid of Ben was the best thing she’s done.
But she didn’t know Harry was the one with a crush.
She couldn’t believe her eyes, he really felt the same? He really did like her? She was almost hyperventilating.
10th of March 2013
I’ve noticed when y/n gets anxious she plays with the ends of her hair, I wish I could just scoop her into my arms and tell her it’s going to be okay.
Ben is finally out the picture, hopefully she can be with someone who knows her self worth.
Her heart is beaming, butterflies fill each side of her tummy, her mind still feeling a little delusional and still very much in disbelief.
Maybe this was her sign to take there friendship another level up.
She slammed the cover over the paper and decided if she’d read anymore she’d become a crimson red mess.
She gently tucked it into the suitcase of where it fell and tried to go on as normal.
She decided to wait up for Harry and see what she could do about this, she couldn’t hide this any longer she wish she knew sooner about his little crush.
It was just past midnight and she heard the hotel room key click in approval.
A tired looking Harry appears.
“Y’alright” she quietly asked.
“Mmm” he hummed shutting the door behind him.
Y/n move to one side of her bed, and patted the empty space beside her, inviting him to join.
Wether it was just his sleepy mind, but he took no time and accepted her invitation.
Y/n let him adjust to the light, and get comfortable not wanting to overload him already.
“Y’okay” he asked, noticing her thinking face.
“Yeah” she smiled.
“Well if I didn’t know any better, than I think that you mr styles have a teeny crush” she said, a breathy laugh leaving her mouth.
His eyes widened, now it it was his time to go red.
“Wha-“ he nervously laughed.
“I guess y’right” he said looking straight ahead at the blank wall.
“Y/n, m’gonna be honest”
“I’m in love with you”
Y/n’s heart pounded inside her chest, this is real? This was real life, he admitted.
“Harry” she blushed.
“And I know, it’s probably weird, we’ve been friends for 4 years now and on a random night , I’m now saying this but, seeing you keep hurting yourself on these boys that don’t understand you, it hurts”
“Harry-“ her cheeks becoming a strawberry colour.
“Be my girlfriend?” Harry blurted.
Y/n’s ears almost burned at the question, Someone she actually had interest in liked her back? And wanted to be with her? She felt like. Lovesick teenager again.
She wanted this, more than ever.
But Louis.
Realistically there was nothing wrong with it, they were the same age, and both wanted it.
“I can’t stand another day, not touching you, not hugging you, not wiping your tears away” he added, which caused y/n’s thought process to halt.
“Harry, y’too good for me” she started, a glossy layer had formed over her eyes.
“Y’need someone better, your options are so big” she said head almost dropping to her lap.
“Hey” he said taking using his index finger and thumb to guide her chin up.
“What I’ve learnt is your the one I want, haven’t been able to settle because of you y/n”
“Be mine?” He asked once again leaning his forehead on hers using his free hand to wipe the tears away.
“Please” he whispered, this is all he’s wanted.
Worried that her words would fail her at that moment all she could do was frantically nod.
“Yeah?” He smiles, there noses basically touching at this point.
“Words baby, need y’words” he reminded.
“Yeah, yes harry yes” she smiled, tears still manage to cascade her cheeks.
“Thank fuck” he breathed, now hesitating to wrap his arm around the girl, oh how he’s longed to do that.
The girl crashes into his touch, not taking her time either.
“Your okay, y’safe in my arms love” he whispered into her hair, pressing his long awaited kisses.
— the following morning —
Both Harry and y/n were getting ready to meet the rest of the lads on the bus, which was round the back of the hotel.
“How are we gonna tell them?” Harry asked getting the rest of his stuff.
“They’ll understand, Louis will be unsure but he’s my brother he can’t hate me forever” she laughed.
She pressed a kiss to his cheek, and they made there way to the boys.
“Guys we have something to tell you all” y/n began.
— — — — —
#harry styles#harry styles fanfiction#my fic writing#harry styles au#request#Harry styles requests#harry styles x y/n#harry styles blurb#one direction#fluff#tpwkwriter#harry tpwk#my writing#harry styles x fem!reader#harry styles x reader#HS#on direction 2013#lhh
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prompt in case you do fuckfest friday: their sex tape leaks. louis thinks harry is gonna freak out but he ends up being really into it
"Okay, baby, it's bad. Like, bury our phones in the garden, escape the general public for a few years bad, I'll admit." Louis has both of his hands up, placating, not sure if it's in his best interest to touch Harry or not. It was his phone, his fucking stupid phone that he set down at the pub and walked away from. His phone that he had unlocked because he was better at not losing it these days. Or so he thought.
"Hm," Harry hums noncommittally. Before him on the kitchen table, there is a long row of gifs posted and reposted over and over on tumblr. The video has only been leaked for little over an hour, but people are fast.
"And I feel it only appropriate to remind you of our vows. I mean, you said it yourself, through good and bad. Through heaven and hell." Louis can feel that frantic energy starting to inch up his spine, panic setting into the very marrow of his joints. "I love you and we're standing on that very expensive rug you just had to have from Germany. So, if you're going to go for brutal murder, should we at least move to the kitchen? You wanted to remodel in there."
"I really do have great legs." Harry sighs, scrolls for a moment where there are a set of four gifs. It's Louis taking him from behind, arms flexing in the dim light of their LA bedroom, the sweat highlight the cut of muscle. Harry is on his knees, back arched, thighs twitching every time Louis slams in.
"Wh-What? I mean, yeah. Of course you do. I've been saying that for literally years but-" Louis sputters, moves to stand beside him, staring down at the laptop. "Baby, you're not-"
"I mean, Brad and I really have been working on toning, not just bulk, you know? And I think it's been paying off." Harry points to the cut of his hamstring as Louis fucks into him, the muscle spasming. "Like that is pretty damn impressive."
"Our sex tape just got leaked and all you can worry about it how good you look in it?" Louis asks slowly, eyes roving from the scene playing out in front of him - another gif, this one of Harry's blissed out face, eyes glassy, as he stares up at Louis, mouth already open.
"I mean, of course I'm worried. But what are we going to do? It's already out. And besides, a little gay sex can be written off. I mean, it's bohemian." Harry flips his hand up, dismissive. "Tom Hardy has had loads of gay sex, even admitted to it too, and next to Cillian he's practically Nolan's favorite."
"I mean, it's Tom Hardy." Louis agrees, nodding his head.
"And I'm Harry Styles. And you're Louis Tomlinson." Harry laughs a little, turning to throw his arms over Louis' shoulders, pulling him close. "We'll be fine. Or it won't. I'm okay with disappearing for a while. As long as it's with you, then everything will be alright."
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Hi dearest! If requests are open and you don't mind taking this one, may I kindly request a list of headcanons or short story writing, whichever you're comfortable with of post-timeskip Louis with female reader doing chores together? I'd love to see their share of domestic fluff and finding joy in the simplest thing such as just folding laundries or washing the dishes together (灬º‿º灬)♡ Especially now that the family is back together, reader is happy now that Louis is livelier than ever compared to how the situation was.
Much thanks if you decided to take on this one! Much love and stay safe 🩷🩷🩷
“Chores With Louis„
Louis J Moriarty x Fem!Reader
“Fold or roll?” (Name) asks Louis, gesturing towards the clean clothes hampers.
“Fold.” Louis says, smiling. “I'll get it.”
“Okay.” (Name) nods her head, returning his smile. “Don't get confused between the clean basket and the dirty basket. I don't think either of us would want to fold dirty clothes.”
“I assure you, you'll find differentiating between the two baskets a rather mundane and easy task.” Louis chuckles, placing his hands on her hips and scooching past her in the hallway to get to the laundry room.
(Name) giggles, patting the space besides her on the bed and watch with a grin as he makes his way to her with the clean laundry basket.
The two of them begin to fold clothes together in comfortable silence with the exception of the occasional light banter and quietened laughter.
“Oh?” (Name) speaks up. “What's this?”
Louis raises an eyebrow. "What's what?"
(Name) holds up a red sweater with horrendously large polka green dots on it - the ugly colour contrast between green and red making her scrunch her nose in disgust.
Louis turns pink, grasping the sweater from (Name)'s hand and shoving it under his pillow. Most likely to fold it later, she thinks.
“Hold on. Is this ugly sweater yours?” (Name) gasps, laughing at the notion. “No way!”
“It's not..ugly.” Louis mumbles, looking away in slight embarassment. “Albert knitted it for me to wear on Christmas three years ago.”
“Oh.” (Name)'s teasing grin almost immediately turns to a softer smile, nodding her head in understanding. “Really? I'm sorry.”
Louis shakes his head, turning his attention to fold another piece of clothing.
“No, it's alright. His knitting skills are nothing to marvel at. I would have reacted the same.”
“It is endearing, though — Albert's actions. He cares for you a great deal.” (Name) whispers softly, gazing at Louis.
Louis hums, nodding his head in agreement.
“Do you think it's gotten better?” She questions curiously. “His knitting?”
Louis laughs softly, his smile reaching his eyes. Although his head is lowered while he's half focused on talking to (Name) and folding the clothes, she can hear the affection Louis has for his elder brother in his tone.
“I would hope so. It's been three years, after all. Perhaps we'll find out this Christmas?”
Louis muses, putting a folded shirt away.
“Perhaps.” (Name) grins softly.
A small silence fills the atmosphere before (Name) opens her mouth to speak up again, continuing her folding along with Louis.
“You seem happier these days.”
“Is that so?” Louis pauses his chore.
“Mhm.” (Name) murmurs, slightly dazed. “Are you?” She continues. “Happier, I mean.”
Louis lifts his head. And when he does, (Name) sees the most purest, gleeful of smiles on his face — the softest, yet the widest.
The kind of smile that makes his scarlet red irises glitter with utter joy and his cheeks hurt.
“The happiest I've ever been.” He whispers.
#louis james moriarty x y/n#mtp louis#louis james moriarty x you#moriarty the patriot#louis james moriarty x reader#louis james moriarty#louis james moriarty fluff#fluff#mtp fluff#mtp x reader#mtp louis x reader#serraphim answers#serraphim
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Hi! Regarding the car scene during the meeting of Lestat and Louis after the horrible fight. I don’t like What happened and i feel for Louis. But Lestat made me feel for him cuz he seemed so sad about his and Louis and the silence was rough on him. Sam is such a great actor. What did You think of that scene?
Well, there is a lot to that scene once more.
For one we get to see a clearly aiming-for-impact (dressed) Lestat who couldn't be bothered to put on a jacket (ahem) to try to get through to Louis, by, while being honest, also attempting to shift blame a bit.
Then there's Louis, who does not even quite look at him, except when he offers to leave... which is actually all the reassurance Lestat needs here.
And then there's Claudia, full on aggressive (as an angry and protective teenager is supposed to be), scratching the hood of that admittedly pretty car^^.
That is the story level of it.
Then of course there is the meaning behind it.
Lestat knows Louis likes cars - that is something they share(!). We have heard Louis brag to Jonah about the car, we have them both stand proudly in front of theirs in their good times.
As I said, that is something they share here, Lestat canonically loves fast cars. So he gets him one in a special color, with a twist to the coffin nose, a joke Lestat obviously expects Louis to appreciate. (But of course which falls flat here, duh). Nonetheless, the car is a very targeted gift. As is his own appearance, quite obviously to show himself off for Louis.
And that is the other side of it, it is clearly both an honest offer... and a manipulation, as so many things. He is trying to lure him back by appealing to the olden times. Which, I think, (maybe) only does not work because Claudia is there. Because as we know, Louis was looking to that phone ringing, and tempted to go to the door much, much sooner.
And then there is the vampiric side to it, and I haven't seen that touched often.
But.
Lestat catches them, with a car, while they are walking through town. And they did not notice him until he honks.
I want to take a moment on this.
Louis and Claudia are both not proficient enough in their vampiric skills to notice a powerful other vampire come at them, unless he honks.
While Lestat not only obviously knows where they are in a rather large radius, but also knows how to time it to catch them. And knows he has to honk.
There are some very interesting implications to this, imho.
a) Lestat could have caught either of them or both unawares at any moment, but he chose not to.
b) Louis and Claudia really are quite weak and very naïve (sorry, I love them dearly, but...), which of course fits with the events in season 2, but it is rather heartbreaking to realize. (They also felt so safe in NOLA despite Lestat being around that they did not look out for him! They are not afraid, just resigned and angry, respectively when they meet him... which is interesting.)
c) Because... Lestat is, at that point deferring to them (even though he challenges Louis), his family, his own coven.
And... that is not the same behavior he will emit when Louis finally takes him back!
Because by then, Lestat had to (really) push through (for a few more years) and this... demure phase has passed. (The hate-sex aftermath is another story, but if you look at his behavior when he is back with them it is begrudging acquiescence at most. And then he takes back over...)
I actually think it might have been much better if they'd have sat down and talked at this moment, while Lestat was not yet slipping back into stubborn defiance (and back to Antoinette), but was still mostly ashamed. I think that could have gone quite differently.
So yes, a lot to unpack in this scene. I think even though there are passive aggressive elements to it that it was an honest attempt to reach Louis, but they weren't there yet, maybe unfortunately.
#Anonymous#asks#amc iwtv#iwtv#amc interview with the vampire#interview with the vampire amc#iwtv amc#iwtv 2022#interview with the vampire#iwtv louis#louis de pointe du lac#beautiful one#lestat de lioncourt#the brat prince#iwtv lestat#claudia de lioncourt#iwtv meta#episode 6#rolls royce#car#ask nalyra
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Happy 28th! Here’s my May 2023 fic rec! So many great fics, organized by word count. Enjoy!!!
Stranger Stars by shaylea (212k)
Five years ago, Africa offered a grieving Louis Tomlinson an escape from an England he couldn't tolerate. Now it's become home as he leads overland tours across the continent with his best friend and driver Zayn Malik. What's meant to be just another ordinary six-week trip from Cape Town to Nairobi turns into anything but, when future lawyer/current photographer and songwriter Harry Styles and his friends join Louis' latest set of passengers.
Own the Scars by crinkle-eyed-boo / @crinkle-eyed-boo (144k)
“But I don’t belong here,” Louis insists.
“Why do you say that?” James asks.
“These people are all drug addicts and alcoholics,” Louis shrugs.
Something sparks in James’ eyes.
“And you’re not?”
Louis has never felt like he was good enough: for his stepdad, for his life-long best friend, for the life he's supposed to want. After an accident that nearly costs him his life, Louis' parents send him to rehab where he’s forced to face his demons. On the long and difficult road to recovery, Louis must confront the truths he’s been avoiding about his future, his relationships, and his sense of self-worth. Because before he can love anyone else, he’s got to learn how to love himself first.
Run Away Home by hattalove / @hattalove (106k)
Louis stands, in the middle of a clearing with his hands in his pockets, and stares. This boy—God, this gorgeous, gorgeous boy. He seems so clumsy, confused at the best of times, but there’s a wisdom about him as he speaks, a maturity that belies his age.
Louis is hopelessly, wildly attracted to him.
or, louis is a successful jockey down on his luck, struggling to get his life back on track after an injury. harry has a horse, a house fit for a prince, and a broken heart.
it takes them a while to figure out that they need each other.
Love of My Life by likelarry / @likelarryfics (80k)
Harry is 36 and recently divorced after he's finally come to terms with his sexuality.
Louis is the 28 year old who helps him find his way and is everything Harry has ever dreamt of.
The one where Harry struggles to really accept who he is and Louis is there every step of the way.
And I’m Weeping Warm Honey and Milk (That You Stay Surrounding Me) by fangirlflailings (78k)
Louis is a first-year medical student, still a little tender as he recovers from a personal trauma. Harry works, amongst other things, as a professional cuddler, though he comes with baggage of his own. They don’t mean it to, but the intimacy that blooms between them quietly changes them both.
Your Memory Over Me by shimmeringevil / @shimmeringevil (64k)
Three years have passed since Louis last saw him, but all it took was a few minutes in Harry’s presence for him to be relegated to the desperate twenty-one year old that was practically begging his boyfriend for an ounce of reassurance that he still cared about him.
Harry shouldn’t be here. He’s brought too many unresolved feelings with him, that Louis thought he’d never have to face.
It’s Harry’s apparent apathy that’s the most difficult to come to terms with. Anger, he could handle. Regret, he would welcome. But Harry’s amiability, and carefree demeanor can only be born from indifference.
He’s moved on. He doesn’t care. And that is something Louis doesn’t think he’ll ever be strong enough to face.
-
OR - The worst heartbreak of Louis’ life walks right back into it when his parents invite their family friends on an all-expenses-paid trip for their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Facing a past that he tried to bury long ago, Louis learns that some people have a way of sticking with you even when they’re gone.
You Taught Me How To Love (You Taught Me How To Stop) by devilinmybrain / @thedevilinmybrain (50k)
"I was always better at hand to hand than you," Harry growls, even as he leans his weight into the blade. It's small, sharp, has a handle of gold roses.
"I don't know about that." Louis moves his arm forward, makes the presence of the barrel of the gun fit snugly to Harry's hip. "I think we just play differently."
"You going to shoot me?" Harry asks, those wild eyes tracking over Louis' face. "Do it."
"I think I've put enough scars on you," Louis answers, means it about the stretch marks still lining the sides of Harry's stomach, but it lands a little too raw. There are other scars on Harry's body that Louis blames himself for, scars inside too.
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🌸 Recently Read Fics - April 2023 🌸
These are all the amazing fics I read over the past month (from shortest to longest). Don’t forget to leave kudos and comments to show the authors your appreciation if you read any of these! 🤍
🌸 Rainy Days, New Adventures by @greenblueish (1k, G)
After a bad day, Louis decides to take a walk in the park where he meets a special man with a special little companion.
🌸 His and Hers by @hellolovers13 (1k, T)
It's just a blanket, it shouldn't make Harry freak out like this.
🌸 Do You See What I See by @allwaswell16 (2k, T)
Harry may or may not be rescuing stray animals as an excuse to see the very hot local veterinarian.
🌸 Changing Weather (For Worse or For Better) by @haztobegood (3k, M)
Five times it's raining and one time it stops.
🌸 Just a little taste by @lunarheslwt (3k, G)
Harry is a vampire that comes home one night, grappling with the darkness that comes with being one. Louis offers him unwavering love, acceptance and the one thing he needs but is reluctant to ask for; permission to bite for the sake of comfort and safety seeking.
🌸 Things Unsaid by @londonfoginacup (4k, G)
Where you have a tattoo of the first thought your soulmate has when they see you.
🌸 There’s More Than Meets The Eye by @faithinwalls369 (4k, NR)
Loving from afar left room for wonder, absent embarrassment and an eradication of stuttering. Falling at one's feet, metaphorically or physically is thrown into the mix, when Niall and Liam play cupid’s arrow, throwing a blindfolded Harry and Louis together. Chemistry isn’t Niall’s chosen subject, but when sparks fly, it’s something he should consider.
🌸 some time to borrow by @sun-lt (8k, T)
In which Louis breaks his arm, Harry buys a car, and they do what they can with the time they have.
🌸 Station 28 by @justahappycloud (10k, G)
Some people meet by accident. Two unassuming worlds that weren’t supposed to even graze each other clash, and in an unexpected twist of destiny, they fuse into one. It’s destructive. It’s life changing. It’s, unequivocally, a complete and utter mess.
Darling, you are my favourite accident by far.
🌸 Keep Driving by @dedtobeginwith (11k, M)
Louis works as a driver contracted through the local cancer institute. All of his clients are associated with the hospital—mostly patients and their families heading home. One rainy afternoon, he picks up Harry.
🌸 Somebody’s Got Your Trainers On (It’s You) by @greenblueish (28k, E)
The one where, after two years, paediatrician Harry returns to Silver Street Hospital and with it to paediatric nurse Louis' life.
🌸 saw some things on the other side by @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed (61k, M)
When Louis moves into the mansion he’s inherited from his great grandfather, he has a plan that consists of three things. One, he’s going to finish writing the next novel in his series. Two, he’s finally going to get over his ex-fiancé. And three, while battling writer’s block and having to resist the urge to kill off the main character in his books – the hot detective based on his ex-fiancé – he’s going to restore the mansion to its former glory.
Unfortunately, Louis’ plan doesn’t take into account the fact that instead of writing murder mysteries, he will find himself in one.
🌸 another friday night by @wabadabadaba (73k, M)
Louis Tomlinson thought signing to BMG would mean he would be free to make his own choices.
He should have known better.
Tasked with getting a public girlfriend, Louis decides to try his hand at finding the right woman himself. From the moment he met Lennon Adair he felt a connection with her but he had no idea how deep that connection would go.
🌸 And What If I Were You by @jacaranda-bloom (109k, E)
For Louis, will losing his sight give him the clarity to realise what is right in front of him?
For Harry, will losing the love of his life give him the strength to finally open his heart?
And can they find their way back, before they lose each other forever?
A story of love. A story of loss. A story of fighting for each other, no matter the odds.
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Heads Up Seven Up/Last Line Tag
Thanks for tagging me, @autumnalwalker and @buffythevampirelover! :D
I'm using this as an excuse to post the proposal scene from Houses Full of Deceit, complete with footnotes (and apologies to Shakespeare):
"Well," Leo stared up at a bird perched on the church's roof, "like I said, I like both. But I… there's a woman. Who I'm in love with. And who's out of my reach."
If Phil listened very carefully she was sure she could have heard her heart break.
Leo continued, "So I like Louis as a friend, but I don't love him."
"Who is she?" Phil forced herself to sound almost casual. Leo had never mentioned another woman in any of his letters. But then, he'd never mentioned any men either. "An actress?"
"No. No, she's… she's someone I wronged very badly years ago. I realised I loved her too late." Leo became very interested in the church's noticeboard. "I caused her a great deal of misery. I nearly got her arrested for a crime I committed, and I didn't speak up to save her."
Phil listened in a mixture of bewilderment and growing hope. She tried her damnedest to keep the hope back. It would only hurt more when she was proved wrong. "Does she know about this?"
Leo laughed, a nervous and almost strangled sound. "She does now."
"Does she forgive you?"
He looked up. Their eyes met. Phil saw her own fears and hopes reflected in his.
"I don't know," he whispered.
"And does she love you?"
"How could she?" Leo turned almost angrily. He leant his back against the railings and glared at the undertaker's shop across the road. "She knows my worst sins now. What sane woman would love me?"
Phil had scandalised some proper-minded ladies by reading the complete works of Shakespeare. She hadn't admitted why. Even to herself she had to admit it was a very good way of passing a few months, but a silly way to feel closer to the man she loved. It stood her in good stead now.
"She has you, if she has you, at your worst. And she will have you, if she has you, better and better[2]."
Silence stretched between them. Leo's eyebrows made a spirited attempt to disappear into his hairline. He made several attempts to speak.
Phil had come this far. If she was going to make a fool of herself, she might as well do it thoroughly. "If I can love you for this, take me. If not, to say to thee I shall die is true, but not for your love. Yet I love you too[3]. And therefore tell me…"
She hesitated, trying to work out whether she should adapt "most fair Katharine" as "most fair Leopold" or leave it out entirely.
Leo took the decision out of her hands. "And therefore tell me, most fair," he reached out hesitantly and brushed a strand of hair back from her face, "will you have me?"
His fingers skated down to her cheek, his touch so feather-light she could scarcely feel it.
Phil's knowledge of Shakespeare failed her.
"Yes," she said simply.
Footnotes (if you're wondering what happened to 1, it isn't included in this excerpt):
[2] Adapted from Henry V, Act V Scene 2: "...thou hast me, if thou hast me, at the worst; and thou shalt wear me, if thou wear me, better and better…". (Henry means his physical appearance will improve with age; Phil misremembers it as referring to his morals improving.)
[3] Phil gets her speeches out of order here; "If I can love…" to "Yet I love you too" are adapted from the same scene in Henry V but are much earlier than the rest of the lines quoted. (The proper quotation is "If thou canst love me for this, take me: if not, to say to thee that I shall die, is true; but for thy love, by the Lord, no; yet I love thee too.")
Tagging @eccaiia, @writingamongther0ses, @emelkae, @scarvenartist, and anyone else who wants to do this! :D
Adding HFOD's taglist: @lightgriffinsect, @oh-no-another-idea, @kittensartswriting, @akindofmagictoo, @cljordan-imperium (Let me know if you want to be added/removed!)
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Transcript to Louis’ IGTV reel (16.12)
Breaking my arm on release day was obviously— it wasn’t in my plans. I definitely— when I pictured this album, I didn’t picture that in my future. So we had to move the signings. And actually, although that was a bit of a graft to do with a broken arm, it was amazing doing it after the number 1. It felt like a celebration between me and the fans. Because the live show’s one thing— obviously I’m out there doing the show— it was great during the signings to kind of meet people face to face, get a vibe for what their favorite songs are, shows they’ve been to, stuff like that. And it was nice, that whole signing tour, just felt like a celebration, and the same with these shows. [Interlude] I didn’t really know what to expect. This tour as a whole this year, has kind of blown me mind. I’d be lying if I wasn’t quite confident— but at the same time, I wasn’t expecting this level of success. To get number 1 in the UK, it was never on my radar. Just another example where the fanbase have just shown how important they are to this whole thing. As my confidence has grown, it’s giving me a chance to really lean on the boys onstage and even offstage. Those types of relationships are vital, obviously, to a good band, but also to a touring crew, because a lot of us are away from our own families, and away from home. So to have that kind of connection, it definitely makes everything loads more fun. The whole show, now we’re introducing some new songs, just feels tighter. It feels more— feels more organic and authentic, to be honest. That’s not to say that I was playing a different role with the Walls songs. I just think everything about these new songs— it just sits better vocally, it sits in the pocket for me nicely. I think we play and sound better as a band, as a collective. I mean it’s like that anyway, when you introduce new songs to a set. I really feel that these songs have given the shows a new lease on life. [Interlude] There was a time, during making Walls, where… not where I questioned whether I wanted to do this, but I questioned my own fulfillment in what it was I was doing, and what’s been so amazing with this project, Faith In The Future is finally the album that I want to make. To do that on my own terms and to have the blessing of the fanbase, and then to get the success that I’m lucky enough to have got from it… There has been an element of, you know, swimming against the tide. I’d like to think that I haven’t made the conventional, straight-down-the-middle pop record. It makes me feel really proud, definitely. It wasn’t necessarily something that… I didn’t expect to feel this good and this accomplished and this excited about what’s to come. I’d say I’m more excited to do something like Face The Music that’s got that kind of uptempo feel that’s, again, written for those live, exciting moments. So a couple of those songs I’ve deliberately kept off these sets. I hope they’ll just come to the show next year, and also feel like there’s evolution from these shows to what the next tour shows are. [Interlude] Yeah, I’m really excited. This is a venue I really love, actually. I came to watch Sam Fender maybe about three years ago. It was a brilliant, brilliant sounding venue, and super prestigious. So yeah, I think this is the perfect venue for Faith In The Future, definitely.
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❤️ LOUSTAT
HOO BOY I hope you're ready for this one friend because it's about to get real fluffy up in here :)
Who is the most affectionate? Okay so here's the thing. We all know Lestat is the Golden Retriever BF who is constantly showering Louis in affection, but Lestat is also the one in this relationship who needs constant affirmation, so in terms of GIVING affection, it's actually Louis who exerts more effort (mind you, these things don't come naturally to him) in making sure Lestat feels cared for.
Who initiates the handholding? Lestat, 100%
Who worries more for the other? Louis absolutely worries more about Lestat, and for very good reason. Louis may be a bit self-depricating and defenseless without any of the Dark Gifts, but Lestat is Lestat, and Louis has to keep a very watchful eye on him because if he's bored for more than 5 minutes he's likely to cause another vampire mass extinction event
Who is more likely to ask for help? Lestat has actually gotten much better at asking for help these days (mostly because he's gotten himself into so much trouble). But asking Louis for help is always a humbling experience, namely because Louis' grace has very strict limits, and when lines are crossed, Louis can, has, and will deny Lestat any aid. Body Thief is such a great example lmao god I could pick apart their interactions in that novel for HOURS
Who is the one always losing the keys? Louis, for reasons stated here but also because Lestat is sappy about Domestic Things. He went through a Lanyard Phase because he liked the way the keys jangled around, but the noise was Too Much for Louis so now Lestat is just the Chivalrous Escort who keeps the keys in his pocket and valiantly opens the door and asks to carry Louis bridal-style through the threshold every damn night.
Who leaves little love notes for the other? Again, love notes are Louis' specialty!!! he scribbles the thoughts as they come to him and leaves them behind in random places. Lestat collects them all and ends up crying every time he finds a new one because they mean so much to him <3
Who can’t sleep unless the other is there? Lestat!!!!! Lestat is canonically a very bad sleeper; he stays up as long as physically possible and experiences frequent night terrors. Having Louis in bed, even if it's just his dead weight while he's in the death sleep, is such a comfort to him.
Who is more likely to propose to the other? Lestat, of course, but not in the way anyone expects. He knows Louis doesn't like grand sweeping romantic gestures, so it happens out of the blue one night, as they're sitting on their balcony late in the evening, watching the throngs of people milling about the street below. Louis says something that makes Lestat laugh, and they kiss, and Lestat just blurts out that he wants to marry him and Louis laughs and blushes and pushes him away but says yes anyway :)
Who introduced the other to their family first? asdgfhgjhbjn this question is not well suited for this series!! brb pouring one out for Paul de Pointe du Lac as we speak
Who is more likely to play with the other’s hair? They both do. As I've said before, Louis' absolute weakness is when his hair is played with. It's his #1 turn on tbh. But Lestat's hair is much more unruly (especially after flying) so Louis often finds himself calling Lestat over to sit in front of him so he can brush it out.
Who makes sure the other has meals/stays hydrated? Again, Lestat has...0 chill when it comes to worrying about Louis being fed. It's one of the many pinch points that still comes up for them on a more regular basis. Even though Louis has gotten over a lot of the reticence he felt in those initial fledgling years, he still has bouts of depression where he won't eat, and it resurfaces a lot of old wounds between them.
Who is more likely to stand up to anyone for the other? Both! And we have plenty of examples in canon lmfao
Who is the most likely to prepare a surprise for the other? Lestat. He knows Louis hates it but he just can't help himself.
Who makes the other pinky promise not to do certain things? It's less pinky promise and more "Lestat, if you even THINK of doing what I think you're doing, you'd better prepare to sleep outside come sunrise."
Who puts a blanket over the other when they fall asleep on the couch? It's a nightly ritual for Lestat to tuck Louis in for his mid-evening nap :) several photos have been sent to the group chat in the past— he can't help it, Louis looks too damn cute
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Okay here we go.Being a horse jockey must be an exciting profession and I am here to explain the in's and out's of Ace's talent.
Origins
While modern horse racing was introduced in the 18 century, the earliest records of the sport came from the Greeks as they had chariot racing as one of the competitions of that age, so horse racing was inspired by this activity, then it spread to neighboring regions like the Middle East, Africa, Persia, and more . Races in the medieval times were conducted to determine one's speed on horseback. The King's Plate races were introduced by Charles the second which were the first ever races that gave out awarded prizes and when the rules of the sport were first made known.France then established the Prix du Jockey Club in 1836. Betting on the winner has also been around since Louis the 14th.
The Process of a Horse Jockey
Well to become a horse jockey you got to learn how to ride a horse which probably means that Ace learned how to ride a horse prior to becoming a professional horse jockey. The legal age of becoming a horse jockey is around sixteen in America and England. Then you go to an academy like the Bluegrass Community Technical Colleges Equine program which is located in Lexington, Kentucky or the Professional Racetrack Exercise Rider/Jockey Program in Olds College in Canada, and The British Racing School in Great Britain. They also have to have a high school diploma or GED.They are also required to pickup a job in that profession like a stable hand or groomer which means Ace probably knows how to clean a horse in the proper way your suppose to clean a horse. Then you would need to get an apprenticeship license which in the US you would need to pass all their exams and be placed in a racetrack for sixty days by a committee to get hands on training. Another thing that a jockey would need would be a professional and personal reference which personally makes me think. Who was Ace's personal reference like sure he is very talented with riding horses, but with his overall personality assuming that his bark with no bite type of behavior was a thing before he went professional and went like "yep he'll be fine". I mean yeah the reference might be he's parents, but anybody else that was close to him would probably know how he would react in such a dangerous sport, but back on topic. You would then need to compete against schooling race and get your journeyman jockey license. To get your journeyman jockey license you would need to have a two year degree from jockey school and the schools usually limit the amount of students to twelve per year.Next thing to do is hire an agent and join a jockey's guild. The guild's bargain for their members and will provide life insurance, disability benefits, and will advocate for safe working conditions.
On The Tracks
Now that we know the process of becoming a horse jockey, I think we should get into the general stuff they do. The average salary for a jockey is around $52,645 and the crazy things that they only get five percent of what they win. They do a lot of calisthenics like squats and burpees, they're also some weightlifting thrown into the mix. Jockey got a riding simulator to practice how to ride and balance on the horse properly. They usually eat foods with high in proteins and fibers, but they diet themselves and drink little to no water since the weight limit of a jockey is one hundred and twenty five pounds. The horses also have to be one hundred to six hundred. pounds. The colors the jockeys wear are actually for the owners or trainers that employ them and the tradition was influenced by racing events in Italian city communities. Now there are five types of racing that range from flat racing to Steeplechase racing. Flat racing is the kind of usually racing where the jockeys and their horses go around the track to the finish line. National hunt racing or better known as jump racing has the horses jumping over hurdles to the finish. Endurance racing is a fifty to one hundred mile that takes the horses and their riders through different kinds of terrain like forests and mountains. Quarter horse racing is a race that's a quarter of a mile to see which horse can go the fastest under such a short distance. Lastly we got steeplechase racing which is basically the same as national hunt racing, but with different obstacles like water and bushes. There's also a race for horses that haven't won a race. Horses can get over excited because they know they are about to race so the routine in a stable is designed to keep the horses calm.
Betting
Investigation Time
So betting on horses is a complicated system of statistics and the ability of the horse you're betting on. So the least complicated bet would be the straight wagers, which the person would bet on if their chosen horse will win wager it will need to get first place, for place it would need to get first or second place, and for show it would need to get into first to third place. The minimum you can bet on them is $2. Exotic wagers are more complicated and difficult to win since you would be betting on multiple horses. So Exacta is where you bet on which two horses will get in first and second place, Quinella is like Exacta but the places of the horses you bet on can be interchangeable, and for Doubles you can bet on two horses that are in two different races. A technique used by a group is known as show parlay, where the group will bet on the same horse and double the amount they bet on. This is the repeated till they lose their bets.
So now we're at the final stretch. Now it seems that Ace can't do a lot to help solve a murder but he is very strong and stubborn which helps when bodyguarding the crime scene or helping with arguments as an extra insight. He also definitely has a lot of knowledge on workout equipment because of the requirements of his talent, which I will admit is very specific in the case that there's a gym in this chapter and if it was anything else then he would just be a bodyguard. If anyone has any questions feel free to ask at any time.
#drdt#danganronpa fangan#danganronpa despair time#drdt spoilers#ace markey#drdt ace#investigations#class trials
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Louis and 70 pls 💗💗💗
A/N good morning, afternoon and evening (have to cover all bases because who knows where people may be in the world its evening for me loves 🫶) of course I would be glad to write this for you (sorry it took me so long to get round to it) on with the showww. OH and I'm gonna make you part of 1d in this hehhehe
PROMPT 70:“I don’t want you… I need you.”
Words: 1,094
warnings: mentions of death via car accident, mentions of alcohol, mentions of sick, mentions of sex its a generally fluff piece though so hope you enjoy.
Life was great at the moment, I was living life to the heights I'd never thought I'd get to 3 years ago when I was a little 19 year old who just lost both parents in a car crash to a teenage drunk driver who knew no better than what I did at that age, I performed on the x-factor stage after my mum told me to "chase your dreams sweetheart" getting me to where I am now. In a band with 5 boys we love performing every night recording our albums and I get to do it with my best friends in tow.
"So. If you guys didn't know. One of our band members has a birthday tomorrow, but we're not playing a show tomorrow. So can you make this show extra special for us? Her family couldn't be here tonight, because they're in better places. So can you make her feel superrr loved for us?" Louis asked the crowd that we were performing to in stockholm tonight. They screamed back.
"You know I think I see a sign over there that says Y/n we love you, we can be your family, there's another one that says We love you y/n happy birthday. There's another one that says I love Y/n more than free wifi. Wow Y/n you are getting the love tonight" Louis said making the crowd scream loud at that part.
"I think we should sing Happy Birthday to Y/n don't you think?" Harry asks which earns multiple yeses from the boys and screams erupting from the crowd and a shake of the head from me.
"okay okay. 3, 2, 1"
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR Y/N HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU"
"I think that's the loudest happy birthday I've ever had. Thank you. Now time for one of our fans favourites this is teenage dirtbag"
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Running off the stage on our Very high high.
"LOUIS!!!" "Y/n, Love you did so great" Is all he says before he's pulling me into a very big hug and swooping me up into the air and then finally putting me down and letting go after much protest on his behalf but me saying I can't breathe did the job
"Thank you for that happy birthday. It was honestly the most love I've ever felt from one of our shows." "yeah well it was all for you and you did it. Happy birthday love" "thank you Louis" Is all I say before I'm pulling him into a hug again in which he wraps his arms around my torso and placing chaste kisses on top of my head.
"And you mean to tell me they aren't together?" Niall speaks up from beside Harry where they are both watching Louis and I from the wall just a few feet out of earshot. But I still heard it. "Yes we are very much not together."
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Louis and I decided to go out to celebrate my birthday, wanting to bring in my 22nd birthday with me. As I had no-one to have a phone call from so Louis decided to take my mind off of it and go celebrate. The other boys were too tired to celebrate I don't blame them so it was just Louis and I
"Lou it's getting late its like 3, we should probably get back. I'm gonna spew my guts if i drink another drop" "yeah that's probably wise me too, come on then dove" "That's a new one?" "yeah, they represent peace and that's what you've always shown. Even when you found out who hit your parents when you racked up the money, you were so calm, you were the one to apologise when you saw how guilty it felt. If that was my mum in the car I'd be saying all kinds of nasty shit to the driver who killed her. Guess that's what I like about ya, dove" "thanks lou but they also represent innocence and purity and I'm none of those two things am I lou?" "No I suppose your not but you do have a pure soul and I guess that is what matters the most" "alright stop with the spirituality mr donny. and lets get back to the tour bus I'm exhausted"
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we get back in and I sit at the kitchen table nursing a whiskey and louis looks at me funny
"what?" "thought you were gonna spew if you drank another drop of alcohol?" "thats different." "how?" "whiskey I can drink slowly, you made me literally DOWN shots" "thats the thing about you that makes me love you Y/n" I just burst out laughing because it wasn't true, the guy I liked had been crushing on ever since 2010 at the first group auditions stage liked me back. "yeah okay" "no I'm being deadly serious" "you're drunk lou. Go to bed" "No, I'm being deadly serious Y/n." "You just want me because your drunk Louis, I'm being serious" "and I'm being serious when I say I want you. Actually no fuck that, I don’t want you… I need you." "Louis you have to mean it because I am not going down that hole of where we mess about like silly fucking teenagers because we're past that point, being teenagers I mean we're fucking adults" "As serious as a heart attack, I love you darling" I jump into his arms where he drowns me into a heavy snog, "Fuck lou. I love you too."
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Last night was one of the best nights ever somehow after everything I ended up in Louis' bunk, the reminder of that was Louis kissing my shoulderbone waking me up from my post-sex slumber "Louis, You seen Y/n" Harry shouts from outside Louis' bunk which earns a giggle from me, ultimately making louis clamping his hand over my mouth. "NAH MATE, HAVEN'T SEEN HER SINCE WE GOT IN LAST NIGHT" I lick his hand that is covering my mouth "DID YOU JUST LICK MY FUCKING HAND!" "Lou who have you got in there?" which makes harry open the bunk, meeting eyes with the both of us "HOLY FUCK. Y/N AND LOUIS FUCKED." which makes the remainder of the boys (excluding louis.) scream from their respectful places on the bus "FINALLY WAS ABOUT FUCKING TIME" and then ultimately zayn says "SHIT NOW WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH THEM FUCKING LIKE RABBITS"
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lets just say that night in stockholm lead to a certain song on four with the same place name, that I wrote.
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end.
#louis tomlinson x reader#louis tomlinson#6thmemberof1d#one direction x reader#one direction#harry styles#liam payne#zayn malik#niall horan#louis tomlinson fluff#one direction fluff
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List of times Harry Styles has "Come Out"
Work in Progress
Over the weekend I was asked by a friend to help find some sources for a paper they were writing about the idea that Harry is queer baiting his fans. My friend was looking for instances where Harry has "come out" over the years.
Obviously, he hasn't really. He's still very much closeted with a large fan base who believes he's dated only women. It goes without saying that I believe he's been in a long term monogamous relationship with Louis Tomlinson since the early 2010s. This list is NOT about Larry though.
I thought it might be useful to someone else for me to share the sources I gave my friend of instances that H has alluded to not being straight.
It took less than an hour to pull these together. There are more.
Mario Cart Interview - https://youtu.be/xHclIjGG-0M start at 5:33 Alluding to sex as a metaphor for Mario Cart.
“Not that important” – https://youtu.be/Yi0wQPXzLoI in reference to female being “what you look for in a lady?” question. Start at 2:10
“Don’t knock it til you try it” in response to Niall dating a man – https://youtu.be/RqmJ21-Qhjs (I can’t find the full interview, but here’s the clip)
Harry reading a sign in 2017 (I think) saying “We’re all a little bit gay.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duxYxRl9y2Q
Article: Harry Styles Waves Pride Flag At First Show On Solo Tour (out.com)
In 2014 he wore out football star Michael Sam's jersey: Harry Styles Supports Michael Sam By Wearing His St. Louis Rams Jersey In Concert (PHOTO) | HuffPost Voices
I think this is the first time he waved a pride flag on stage: Harry Styles Wore a Gay Pride Flag as a Cape
Better Home and Gardens: Exclusive: Harry Styles Shares the Meaning Behind His New Album, 'Harry's House' (bhg.com)
Around the time of Fine Line, he faced scrutiny around his sexuality. People became incredulous that he wore dresses, waved Pride flags, and yet hadn't clarified with precision, publicly to a journalist or on social media, the specifics of who he'd slept with, how he defined. This expectation is, to him, bizarre, "outdated." "I've been really open with it with my friends, but that's my personal experience; it's mine," he said. "The whole point of where we should be heading, which is toward accepting everybody and being more open, is that it doesn't matter, and it's about not having to label everything, not having to clarify what boxes you're checking."
Harry Styles Says He Doesn't Label His Sexuality | Teen Vogue This is Teen Vogue reporting on another interview, but I can’t find the original.
In an interview with the Sun, Harry says he has never labeled his sexuality, going on to say he's never felt the need to explain that part of himself.
“No, I’ve never felt the need to really. No," Harry said when asked if he's labeled his sexuality. “I don’t feel like it’s something I’ve ever felt like I have to explain about myself.”
“Being in a creative field, it’s important to be progressive. People doing stuff like that is great," Harry said, referring to Miley Cyrus opening up about her pansexuality. “It’s weird for me — everyone should just be who they want to be. It’s tough to justify somebody having to answer to someone else about stuff like that.”
There’s some stuff in this article about him talking about gay sex in film. Not sure if it’s relevant because it’s behind a pay wall for me. How Harry Styles Became the World’s Most Wanted Man – Rolling Stone
Singing Girl Crush https://youtu.be/rroc2y9if_
Helping people come out at his concerts. One example: https://youtu.be/R_fgdHttTg8
But Daddy I love him
Safe Sex
It's the freedom he screams at the end; https://youtube.com/shorts/lCC13QFepI0?feature=share
Do you have any crushes on girls: "No Never. Never again." https://youtu.be/84JICVwTnb4
This has a lot of moments: https://youtu.be/RqmJ21-Qhjs
From a really early point in 1D, he used gender neutral pronouns to describe his dream date when asked “what do you look for in a girl.” Some examples:
1. https://youtu.be/tnrRXIvSCBY
2. https://youtu.be/Ai16adQ1mZ0 (1:17)
3. https://youtu.be/pvm_2deGwWo
This whole SNL skit from 2019: https://youtu.be/aeoxg8hx-lc
Talking with Nick Grimshaw about getting the part in Dunkirk
Covering Wet Dream: https://youtu.be/vMAPW7ZoOLw
The banana penis necklace: Harry Styles sports a phallic symbol necklace for his 2021 Grammys performance | Daily Mail Online
Vogue: December 2020 Harry Styles on Dressing Up, Making Music, and Living in the Moment | Vogue
Pleasing: Harry Styles launches his own fine beauty line— Pleasing (lifestyleasia.com)
Gucci rainbows
The outfit he wore at the red carpet for My Policeman included a green corsage on his lapel
Harry Styles Goes Green in Gucci Suit at ‘My Policeman’ TIFF Premiere – WWD
Green flower connection: About our symbol, the green carnation - Oscar Wilde Tours
Referencing the song 1950 by King Princess. (screen shot by me from Twitter on 9/16/22)
Studying rainbows. (screen shot by me from Twitter on 9/16/22)
Instagram post from June 12, 2016. Screen shot by me on 1/1/23.
There are more. I'll as I come across things. I think for me, it's about the consistency with which he's aligned himself with the LGBTQ+ community over the years. It's not isolated to recent times. It goes back more than a decade.
Companion piece: Louis Tomlinson - LGBTQ Icon
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I mean, you can be a “frilly, girlie model” type of woman and still be sporty or into sports? Like celebrities, influencers tend to curate an image and I don’t know anything about this particular influencer, but people do have layers, can be both one thing and another. It might not be as profitable to be a sporty female influencer as a more glamorous one and that can depend on the kind of influencer someone aspires to be 🤷♀️ it’s more saying that we as an audience, etc, don’t always know exactly what someone is into away from their public persona and life. Sorry, I guess I just don’t like the assumption that a “girlie” woman couldn’t also like sports. That feels a bit misogynistic. I’m sure the person behind that ask didn’t mean anything by it, I’m just sensitive to the passive implications of the societal expectations surrounding women and their expression of their interests. Some would call me a “girly” type of woman and yet I also enjoy playing a couple of sports and follow sports
Oh, and there are definitely layers behind the people celebrities follow, a well-established way to send attention to someone, hint at connections, etc. I don’t think always but a lot of the time. The times when the speculation annoys me mostly is when the woman in question is a musician, especially one who opens for Louis, etc. Like with Ava Lily, the fan response to that was very uncomfortable for me and for Ava Lily too, based on some of the things she has liked. With female musicians, I just think it would be good to not make a big deal about following or liking their posts unless something actually happened. Of course musicians date each other but the other implication is that Louis can’t just appreciate a female musician’s talent, which just reinforces the way women are treated in the industry, and I don’t like a mostly-female fanbase helping to push those kind of speculations
Someone mentioned to me this morning that for all of Louis’ “I want to pay for my sisters to go to uni instead of ending up like the Kardashians” grumble a few years ago, he publicly dates only women who aspire to be like the Kardashians, and he hooked up with someone who wants to be exactly like a Kardashian and had a child with her. So… Louis maybe isn’t a great role model for feminism.
(Do not even defend the Kardashians as feminists or girl bosses. They’ve warped an entire generation of women into hating our bodies and are basically in it to increase their wealth.)
We can all do better with the way we talk about women in this fandom 🥰
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hey do you have any fics where larry is in an established relationship but they’re keeping it secret for one reason or another ???
yesss here u go
Secret Relationship
the first one contained heavy amount of smut read at your own risk
We Keep Taking Turns by Ropewithnoanchor
E, 69K
The start of the On The Road Again Tour means new anxieties, this time for both Louis and Harry. Between performances, traveling, interviews, family time, and the biggest crisis their band has ever faced, they have to help each other feel better the only way they know how—through domination and submission.
[A relatively canon-compliant story of nights in hotels and bedrooms, starting in February 2015.]
Hands Clasped Tight by afirethatcannotdie
E, 44K
“What am I looking at here?” Harry asks.
“This, my friends, is a ‘proof’ Instagram account, run by your students,” Liam announces.
“It’s got all this stuff about how the two of you are together,” Niall adds.
“I heard about that,” says one of the math teachers. “Confiscated a kid’s phone today when they were looking at it. I have to say, the evidence that you’re dating is pretty damning.”
“Really,” Louis says dryly. “Do you think being married for three years might have something to do with it?”
Or the one where Harry and Louis are high school teachers and their students have been playing matchmaker for over a year. Little do they know, Harry and Louis are already married.
If You Asked Me If I Love Him (I'd Lie) by allyasavedtheday
M, 26K
So Harry and Louis might have fucked up.
The day of their wedding was the single most perfect moment of Louis’ life and every single day since where he’s been able to call Harry his husband has been nothing short of bliss. There’s just one teeny, tiny problem…
Their families don’t know they’re married.
*
Or the one where Harry and Louis eloped but neglected to mention it to anyone. Meanwhile Lottie is getting married and the only way for them to not steal her thunder is by pretending they're just friends for the weekend. Featuring Harry and Louis as terrible liars who don't know the meaning of the word platonic and some Tomlinsons and Styles's who definitely don't believe them.
Into The Midnight Sun by summerwine
E, 63K
Every day without Louis was a never ending blue Monday. Every day went without his sweetness and warmth and the radiant colours of his flame. The tenor of his voice became unfamiliar and muddled between going so long without the sound of it and getting lost with every other voice clouding Harry’s memory.
But he was here now, warming Harry’s bones with lips like summer. Every moment in his arms felt like a Sunday stroll through London. Beautiful and stormy and feeling every bit like home.
or, It's 1983, Harry embarks on his first world tour and Louis is a budding actor in LA. Life spent apart isn't easily adjustable, but somehow they make it work.
Call Answered by vondrostes
E, 249K
The day after his 27th birthday, Harry Styles attempts suicide. Louis is flown to his bedside to unravel the mystery of why he did it after a flash drive is found with a note attached, addressed to Louis. On it are a collection of 78 songs, all written for different dates from their past.
You Watched Me Sink by bananasandboots
E, 38K
They've discussed it a few times - the boyfriend thing. It's not like it's some forbidden, horrific, abandon hope all ye who talk about furthering the relationship sort of subject. They're mature adults. They're in tune with their feelings, their hearts' desires, the way those butterflies swoop in their bellies whenever they so much as hold each other's hands. They like each other. A lot. It's mutual, they know. But for now, they're just content to enjoy the simplicity of what they have, and what they have is great.
When dating in secret stops being enough, then they'll discuss that too.
Or, the one where Harry teaches Sex Ed and sneaks around with the drama teacher, and doesn't realize how out of tune he is with his true feelings until everyone else figures it out for him.
Lover Boy by brightgolden
E, 27k
“I’d love to meet your lover boy one day,” Lottie says suddenly as she pours Louis a whiskey on the rocks after their dinner.
OR
Where Louis wants to tell everyone about his relationship with Harry, but his boyfriend clearly thinks otherwise.
please leave a like or reblog ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚
#ps. i only recommend fics that i like and read already#so it's guaranteed not a fail hehe#harry styles#louis tomlinson#larry stylinson#oh btw anon sorry for the ~2years late reply lol#larry fic recs
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24.But there’s a shining in the shadows
Masterlist - Previously - Next
Chapter soundtrack: Home - Gabrielle Aplin
And just like that it was over. Because of a stupid deal. All those years of hard work and sacrifice, reduced to ashes because of a deal. And the sad thing was that she knew it could happen but still, she chose to get on with it. Not only had she been fired, but it was with immediate effect, meaning that she was staying with the team until the end of the Monza Grand Prix. And to make everything worse than it already was, Wilhelm had looked at her with a sadistic smile when telling her that she had to pay back fifty percent of what she had earned working with them. Of course, the reason invoked was her lack of reliability and that, that was no good. No other team would like to give her a chance if she was deemed unreliable. She knew that there was a high chance that her dad would hire her but still, they would all think that she was there because of her dad and not because of her work. Now more than ever.
And even if she didn’t like working for Skoda, she was grateful for her friendship with Niels and Noah who made the experience a little more fun and bearable. She didn’t follow much of the free practices and rushed out of the garage as soon as the first one was over. She felt as if everybody was staring at her, as if they knew that she had been fired and she felt the panic gripping her throat and her vision getting blurry. She didn’t want to pass out, today was not the day. She was brutally stopped in her tracks by two hands on her shoulders, firmly holding her in place.
“Julia? You're pale, slow down for a minute.”
She recognised Kyle’s voice and suddenly she felt better, safe. He always had a reassuring vibe and she always felt good when he was near. He was a great guy.
“Do you want me to go fetch, Ethan?”
“No! I… I want my dad or my mom or anyone from my family.”
“Okay… come with me, I take you to the hospitality. I’m not letting you wander alone.”
He didn’t ask questions, he just escorted her to the main hospitality, where everyone from every team could go. They entered and Kyle scanned the room to find Lyanna or anyone that Julia could go to. She was there with Louis and Kat, a cup of tea in their hands as Louis had his headphones on and was writing in a notebook. As soon as Lyanna saw the distressed in her daughter’s eyes, she rushed to her. Kyle asked if she would be okay and when she nodded, he left, not without giving her one last worried look.
“Julia, darling, what happened?” Lyanna moved to the side as Kat was grabbing a chair so Julia could sit.
“They… I’ve been fired.”
Saying the words made it all too real and that was enough for her to break. Lyanna threw her arms around her, pulling her against her as Louis was removing his headphone and looked at his sister.
“Are you sad?” he asked, naively.
“No, I’m overjoyed Louis!” she snapped, making her brother frown. Understanding that she might be taking it too far, she added quickly. “I’m sorry. I had a really bad day.”
“You lost your job? Because of Ethan? Do you want me to hit him?”
“No… not because of him… not really.”
“That means he is responsible because then, you would have said a straight no.” he commented.
“It’s complicated, Louis.”
“No. You are sad because you lost your job and it’s his fault. You loved your job. It is your dream. And because of him you have to give up on it. It’s not fair. He doesn’t make you happy. I hate him.”
“Louis… you don’t hate Ethan.” intervened Lyanna.
“Yes, I do! He doesn’t love my sister! He makes her cry! Daddy doesn’t make you cry, mom. Not like that.”
“Daddy made me cry a lot, darling. But it didn’t mean that he didn’t love me. Love is not black and white, it’s a myriad of colors that sometimes match and sometimes don’t. They blend all together to create new ones. It’s a lot of things.”
Julia wasn’t strong enough today to endure another fight, let alone with her brother. She took a gulp of the glass of water Kat brought and stood up.
“Julia… are you sure you’ll be fine. You can wait for dad here.”
“I have to leave with Ethan. We came together, we have to leave together. That’s what we agreed on and what Ashley thinks it’s best.”
“Fuck Ashley. I’ve never liked her. You are clearly not fine, Julia. Ethan can understand, I’ll text him right now to let him know.” said Kat.
Julia didn’t have the strength to argue. She let Kat take care of her son and tried to forget about the day and how she would have to keep a straight face for the whole week-end. Monza was starting to become her personnel hell, something she would have never thought to say. It didn’t take long for Ethan to arrive after his mom’s texts, looking around in search of her. When he finally found her, he rushed to her side only to be stopped halfway by Louis.
“Don’t go near her.” he said, trying to have a threatening voice.
“Louis, buddy. I’m here for your sister, okay. I’m going to take her back to the hotel and I’ll take care of her.”
“No! Because you made her sad, she cried because of you. I have to be a good brother and I have to protect her. If… If you… If you come closer I will hit your nose.”
He positioned his fists in front of him, slightly shaking. Ethan tried to catch Julia’s gaze but she was avoiding him, focusing on her brother.
“Louis, put your left foot in front of your right one. If I punch you, you will lose your balance.”
“Does that mean you are going to fight me?”
“No. I’m not going to fight you, I don’t want to hurt you.” he explained calmly.
“Well, too bad for you because I will do it.”
And Ethan would have let him punch him because he knew he deserved it. So he braced himself for the impact that never came as Julia's voice stopped in right as Louis was preparing his punch.
“Louis, stop. It’s fine. You don't need to protect me. I can do that on my own.”
“I don’t want you to go with him!”
He tried to force her to stay by pulling her arms way stronger than necessary making Julia wince in pain. He was refusing to let her go and was almost crying, resulting in Julia crying even more as well. Ethan stepped in, trying to get Louis to release his grip on his sister. But even if he looked like a leaf that could fall from a tree at the first windblow, he was actually quite strong. As Ethan was close, Louis started to kick him anywhere he could until Lyanna came to him to whisper a few words in his ear that had the effect of stopping him completely. Julia saw her brother shut out and felt guilty. She had never wanted him to hate Ethan, or to feel like he had to protect her. It was her job, her duty as a sister.
She saw her mom put Louis’ headphones back on his ears and take him in her arms as he held onto her. She would have stayed like that, looking at her mom and brother; not knowing what to do or say if Ethan had not linked his fingers to hers, pulling her to him. They left the hospitality and made their way to the exit, in silence, head hanging low to not be recognized. Once in the comfort of the car, Ethan turned to Julia.
“What happened? Kyle came to me saying he found you on the verge of passing out…”
“I lost my job, Ethan.” she blurted out.
He didn’t know what to say. He knew how her work was Julia’s everything, how proud she was of it, how it was a huge part of her. He knew that it would be affecting her. A lot.
“I’m sorry…”
“Not as much as me. The thing is… Why am I sad? I started hating working there, I was used and even by getting rid of me they are still trying to find ways to make my life even more hellish that it is. I have to pay them part of what they gave me. Because I’m a bad investment. A bad investment that gave them upgrade ideas that they are going to use… I feel stupid.”
“You are not stupid. And… I’m sure you’ll find a new job in a new team super fast. Maybe your dad…”
“I know! I know that my dad can help me but… you don’t understand. I wanted to do it on my own. I wanted to prove to everyone that I could do it. I wanted to prove myself that I could do it. But even so, I’m incapable of…”
“Don’t say that… I’m sure that you’ll find a new position in no time.”
She snarled and looked away before taking her bag and rummaging through it until she found tissues. She rubbed her eyes in a desperate attempt to erase the trace of mascara that were on her cheeks.
“I don’t want to look like a panda.” she was quick to add. “Wouldn’t look good in pictures, right?”
Ethan could hear her bitter tone and couldn’t help but feel guilty. He gulped.
“Julia..”
“No. You made it perfectly clear that you don’t want anything else other than business with me. I got it. How naive I was to think that maybe what happened in this corridor yesterday meant something. So if you want me to stay professional, I’ll do it. Take me back to my room.”
The ride back was made in complete silence, only briefly interrupted from time to time by her sneezes. Whenever Ethan was trying to look in her directions, furtively, her head was turned to towards the window. He wanted to tell her that the incident in the corridor was not a mistake, that maybe it shouldn’t have happened, but it felt right. Too right, too good, too perfect. The way her body fitted against his, the way it answered to his touch, he had never known something like that before. And it was terrifying. They soon arrived at the hotel where fans were waiting for them, screaming Ethan’s name.
“Are you going to manage faking being happy or do you want us to enter from the back?”
“My mom was a great actress, I can do it. Time to pretend…” she sighed before leaving the car, a huge smile on her face.
Ethan followed her, close, his hand on the small of her back as the other one was holding her hand in his. He waved to the crowd, thanking them. Right before they were about to go inside, a mom called out his name pointing to her little girl that was holding a big drawing in her hand. Ethan looked to Julia, silently asking if he could leave her for a moment and she nodded, heading inside on her own.
She was about to take the elevator to go to her floor when she heard Ethan coming back, almost running. He had a happy smile on his face and shoved a drawing and a book to her face.
“Look what they gifted me! It’s a beautiful drawing of me on the track. Well it’s a four years old drawing but still, you can recognise the color of my car and my number. And they even gave me a book with pictures of me during my career. I did not remember how good looking I was when I was 12. Look at that baby face.”
She ignored him, pressing the button to the third floor as he was still commenting on the pictures. Once the door opened, she stepped out, expecting him to stay where he was, as his room was on the fifth but he came with her.
“I want to stay alone.”
“Julia, I’m not letting you on your own, you had a shitty day and…”
“And who’s fault is that?” she snapped.
“Yeah and I feel responsible. Really, I feel guilty, Julia. About a lot of things.”
“I agreed with helping you, I’m responsible too.”
“Not as much as me.”
“I won’t make a contest of who fucked up the most, Ethan. Not today. I just want to forget about everything, take a shower and go to bed and be ready for tomorrow to smile and look pretty next to you because that’s probably the only thing I’ll do in the next few weeks.”
She was about to open her door and to close it right to his face when he grabbed her wrist making her wince in pain. Louis had a strong grip and she would be lucky if she did not have a bruise the next day. Unfortunately, Ethan noticed and delicately gave it a closer look. It was red and he could see the trace of Louis’ fingers.
“Joolsie…” he said in an apologetic voice.
“Don’t. I don’t need your pity.” she was on the verge of tears.
“I know. But I won’t let you alone. I can’t let you when you look like that. You look awful.”
“Jeez, thanks… you know how to make a girl feel good about herself.”
“I’ve never lied to you, I won’t start today.”
He took a step towards her, slowly, as if she could run away. She didn’t flinch when he draped his arms around her shoulders, nor did she complain when he pulled her against his chest. He could feel his shirt getting soaked because of her tears but he didn’t care. He pulled her harder to him as she let go.
“I’m staying tonight. No negotiations. I’m not letting you alone.”
“Thank you.” she mumbled.
He reluctantly let her leave his embrace to lock herself in the bathroom where she stayed for a very long time. He could hear the shower running as he was making the bed more as a distraction than in a real need to. When she finally came back, he was sitting in the bed, a few pillows put between his side and hers, waiting for her and looking uncomfortable.
“I found the cream in my bag.” he said sheepishly.
“The miracle one?”
“Yeah… Do you… do you want me to apply it on you?”
“I can do that on my own…” she argued, more annoyed than angry.
“Julia… please. Let me take care of you."
She sighed before sitting next to him and offered him her left arm. Softly, he took it and took the time to inspect the fingerprints left by Louis around her wrist. He saw how she clenched her fist, clearly more in pain than what she was pretending. Gently, he started to rub the cream on her, in little circles, paying attention to how her breathing picked up and how she couldn’t stop the goosebumps from appearing on her skin.
“Am I hurting you?”
“Are you talking about right now or in general?” she whispered.
“How many times will I have to say that I’m sorry?”
“Until I feel like you really mean it.” she replied.
“I’m not lying, Julia.”
“You do.” and with a sad voice she added. “But it’s okay, I’m lying too. To you and myself. So it’s a draw.”
He stopped massaging her wrist to look at her. There were so many things he wanted to say, so many things he wanted to do but he didn’t know where to start. There were things he didn’t want to admit, to her but mostly to himself. If only she could read in his eyes all his thoughts, it would be so much more simple. But she avoided his gaze by slipping under the cover and turned off the light. It wasn’t dark outside, far from it but she felt less vulnerable in the dark. That way, he couldn’t see her face, he couldn’t judge her or feel sorry for her. She turned her back away from him and she felt him do the same. She was stopping herself from moving and she knew he was doing it as well. She didn’t know how long they stayed like this, unable to sleep and overthinking every move until she broke the silence.
“Ethan? Can you hug me? I really need someone to hold me…”
She didn’t even have to ask for it twice, soon she felt his warmth come closer and an arm around her waist pulling her against him. She felt his lips against her ear and his breathing in her neck and soon she fell asleep.
When she woke up the next morning she was still in his arms, but her face pressed against his chest. She looked up to him already awake and watching her.
“What time is it? Are we late?”
“It’s almost eight in the morning, we don’t have to be there until ten. I didn’t want to move, you were sleeping well. How are you feeling?”
“Soon to be officially unemployed.”
“You still have the weekend with them?”
“Only to collect my stuff and say goodbye to everyone. That’s it, they have already revoked my access and I have to give them my badge back after the race.”
“I promise I’ll give you a better and more beautiful badge.”
“That won’t be hard.”
She stretched and rolled over, out of his arms. As she left the bedroom, Ethan took his phone and scrolled down his contact list to find the name he was searching for. He made sure Julia was under the shower before pressing the call button.
“Ethan? I wasn’t expecting your call. Is there something wrong that couldn’t wait for you to arrive at the paddock? His team principal asked.
“I wondered if you had given some thoughts about Julia’s situation?”
“I did. There might be an opening in the team. Alice, who is working closely with Ludwig, is going on maternity leave soon and she is not sure she would like to get back her position when she’ll be able to. We are thinking of moving her to the factory. That means we are going to need someone to fill her position. I wanted to, initially, promote someone from the factory but I know that living on the road is not for everyone so I thought about Julia…”
“Perfect! Do you think we can have something ready for her? An offer she can study?”
“Ethan… I’m not saying that I’m giving her the job. I’m considering it. She would need to go through the usual interviewing process. It’s no because she is your friend that she will get special treatment.”
“She wouldn’t want that. I just want to know that not all doors are closing for her. I just want her to know that people want to work with her, that she is valuable.”
“When do you think she could start the recruiting process if she is interested?”
“I’ll tell her. For now she needs a little bit of time to move on from what happened. Maybe during the summer break? Would it be fine?”
“I would need someone to start straight after the end of the season, so it should be fine.”
Ethan was about to answer when the door opened revealing Julia, looking way more dressed than usual. He could see the effort she made, applying her makeup and he wondered why. He liked how she wasn’t giving much thought to her appearance. She was always looking pretty, of course, but she never had to put in too much effort. He apologized to Christian and hung up.
“Are you going anywhere fancy?”
“No. I just thought that maybe today and because there will be more people around, I should try to look my best… Is it too much?”
“It’s unusual…” he said.
“What do you mean by unusual? That I look pretty? That I make an effort?" She was upset.
“Of course not! You always look beautiful, it’s just that you don’t need to do that… I like how you dress on the daily.”
She nodded, fidgeting with her bracelet when Ethan remembered something. After what happened in the corridor, he had left the restaurant and wandered in the streets, trying to process what had happened, when he had seen a traveling shop, selling bracelets and items you could add to them. Naturally, it reminded him of Julia’s bracelet and he had stopped. Browsing the content of what the seller had he had found a cute little italian flag and as he knew how much Italy and Monza meant to Julia he had bought it, thinking he would give her later. Then life got in the way and he had not got the chance to give her. But she looked so stressed out and sad, even under a ton of makeup, that he wanted her to have something that could make her feel better. He went to his backpack and retrieved the little small packet where the trinket was.
“I know it won’t erase everything but I have something for you…”
“Ethan…you don’t have too.”
“It reminded me of you. Don’t ask me why.”
He tried to downplay it but felt a little anxious when she opened the package to reveal what was inside. He saw her pause, examining the little trinket before hanging it next to the Monaco flag.
“I don’t even know why it was not already there considering how my parents feel about Italy…” she simply said.
“Yeah. It’s kind of like a link… your parents, us… Italy is special.”
“A perpetual reminder of the day I lost my job and possibly my career… I don’t know how to feel about it. I.. I like it, don't get me wrong, it’s just that today… it’s bittersweet.” she confessed.
“I didn’t want you to feel like that… It was not the goal. I’m so stupid I should have waited to give it to you, I just wanted you to feel happy…”
“Maybe… I just need a good reason to feel happy.” she said, looking at him with hope in her eyes to which Ethan shrugged.
No other words were exchanged after that as they headed to the paddock. It was more crowded than the day before but this time Julia knew what to expect and didn’t freeze when it was time for her to get out of the car. Pictures were once again taken and people said once again how perfect they were for each other when all Julia wanted was to cry.
Going to Skoda was tough, announcing that she was leaving to Niels and Noah broke her heart and theirs as well. They gave her a big hug, promising that it was the end of an adventure but the beginning of a new one and that no matter what would happen they would still be there for her and they would still be her friend. But their goodbyes were quickly interrupted by Whilem who asked Julia if he could see her as he had something to talk to her about.
In the small office, she took a seat and waited. He couldn’t say anything worse than what he had already told her before.
“I wanted to talk to you about the gardening period.”
“Gardening period?” she repeated, surprised.
“You know that I can’t let you go like that, you’ve seen things, worked on them. I can’t let you leave just like that without guarantees.”
“I’ve barely been in the team for three months? How can I be under gardening?” she argued.
“For a year. Just to make sure that you are not going to use what you learned here to help other teams. Of course it’s always negotiable if someone wants to buy you back, but I doubt it. No one will want the girlfriend of a driver in their team, less someone deemed unreliable.”
“A year?”
She was astonished, angry and sad. She knew that it could happen but she never thought that he would go this far and a part of her was sure that it was to piss her off. That he enjoyed it. But the prospect of not doing what she loved the most for a whole year was breaking the small amount of confidence she had left. She could kiss her dream of making her own name in the industry goodbye. It was over for her need to feel legitimate. No one would take her seriously now. God, Monza was truly a nightmare.
Author's note: Contrary to what you all might think, I don't enjoy making Julia suffer... What do you think will happen next? Let me know your theories, I love to read them.
Don't hesitate to leave a comment or an ask, as well as reblogging and leaving a like. It helps a lot for the story to find its audience. I also have a taglist for this story, so if you want to be added so you never miss a chapter, let me know.
Taglist:
@herondalism @aundercover @musingsbyshreya @karmabyfernando @reengard @mycenterfold @smoooothoperator
#writing#fiction#charles leclerc#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 x oc#charles leclerc fanfic#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen
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