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mntalbrakdown · 9 months

Text

sober thoughts - C. Fisher

masterlist!

mentions of: underage drinking, cussing, fluff, smut. MDNI. piv, unprotected sex, fingering

synopsis: you were once friends with conrad until summer happened and he just stopped talking to you

wc: 5.7k

“don’t ever forget me” your little twelve-year-old self whispered to Conrad who was a year older than you

“never,” he said playing with your hair as you both lay on the grass watching the fireworks on the fourth of July. your head laying on his chest.

“y/n are you almost ready” Belly yelled at you trying to get you to hurry up for the party you were about to go to with her and Taylor

“yes almost,” you say playing with your hair and making sure each strand is not misbehaving

“chill belly being hot takes time,” Taylor says applying more lip gloss

“anyways y/n how are you and Conrad” Taylor puts away her lip gloss in her purse

“he’s an ass and I don’t even talk to him,” you said

“What did you even do,” Belly asked playing with the ends of her hair

“I don’t know we were really close in Cousins and like two years ago in summer I started to get guys' attention and all of a sudden he got distant,” you said reminiscing the best summer of your whole life you told the girls you pulled 6 boys the whole summer but that came at a cost, losing the one guy you loved

“you had a glow-up,” Taylor says looking at you and holding your hand

“yeah, she did” you see Jeremiah at Belly’s door frame which made you smile. they've been flirting back and forth

“are we ready,” Belly asked and you nodded

you all headed downstairs to see Susannah and Laurel in the kitchen probably stoned and said goodbye to them. when you arrived at the car Belly called shotgun which meant you and Taylor would sit in the back of Jeremiah’s Jeep.

“so y/n you're the driver tonight right” Jeremiah looked at you from the rearview mirror

“when am I not” you scoff looking out the window. it wasn’t a rude remark it was a sarcastic one because you don’t really do any substances. so it was common sense that you would drive

everyone in Cousins lived close to one another so it didn’t take long to hear the loud music and the screams coming from a house. the house was already spilling bright colors on the street making you excited. when Jeremiah finally parked he handed you the keys because one time he held onto them and lost them. it was a whole ordeal, you spent an extra hour at the house trying to find them when he had them in a random coat that was hung up by the front door.

“hey Steven is here” Taylor pointed out to his car seeing that they also just got here.

“who’s that next to him,” Belly asks as you were getting out of the car looking at your phone for any new notifications when you accidentally bump into a tall stature

“oh sorry,” you both say looking at each other

"con what is wrong with you" you yelled at him. it was no use when he was in his own world he stayed there for at least a week. usually, you could get him out, but something was different that summer, you couldn't change him

"leave me alone" Conrad yelled at you, he was running up the stairs and the next thing you heard was his door closed shut. it was hard to miss, it echoed all over the house

"I'm so sorry for him," Susannah said.

the plan that day was to go watch a movie that was playing in the drive-in and then play at the beach with the whole group and watch the tide as you and Conrad listened to the music and possibly help you surf. but all that went down the drain and you didn't even know why.

“conrad” you say looking to meet his gaze.

“Conrad is here, y/n let’s go, no,” Taylor says screaming ready for you to get into the car making him laugh which you missed hearing

“Taylor it’s ok,” you say as she is getting out of the car with a stank face already plastered on

“hi Conrad,” she says moving her way in between the two of you and grabbing your hand to drag you to the party

as you were getting dragged into the party you were greeted by a group of people already by the door and a couple making out at the end of the hall

“hey I'm going to go get a drink” Taylor yells at you trying to get her voice to be heard over the music. you on the other hand were ready to go to the living room just to people watch

the thing was when you were at parties you would straight b-line to the living room because although people liked to conversate, that is the last place they would go. You liked to sit there and try to find other drivers there and you would make friends with them. It was hard to talk to a drunk person because they were boring and slur their words together. Today you saw Cameron, he is always there. You grew to like him like it was hard to anyway. He was so nice and you both had things in common.

"hey" you heard his little smile in his voice

"hi cam," you say receiving a bottle of water he got you

"so who are you here tonight with" cam asked you

"Jeremiah, Taylor, and Belly," you say

"so Conrad is still being weird," cam asked

"yeah," you said a bit disappointed. you told Cam everything because he was there and being sober at a party is pretty boring

"that's weird because he is staring at us," Cam says looking over at him; making you follow his gaze. Conrad had this weird look on his face, his eyes were dark, but it wasn't because of the lighting it was something else. hatred? you brushed it off he isn't your problem, never will be.

"y/n want to play uno" Conrad yelled at you from the bottom of the stairs.

Uno was your favorite game to play at Susannah's house in the summer. It was always perfect. The adults were never there so it would make you feel comfortable with everyone else. It was when you would sit next to Conrad before he was unavailable and you two would team up without everyone knowing. In reality, everyone knew. and you both would win. you would take turns on who would win to make it seem "less" suspicious.

"so" cam says snapping you from your haze

"right duh" you laugh grabbing the mini uno you would always carry it around because it helped you make friends with people

"ooo can we play" Some random girls joined in and you said yes because you had no real reason to say no, plus uno is best played with more than two

"I'll join too," Conrad says gripping his beer rather firmly. he sat next to you on the couch ready to get the cards you shuffled.

when the games began you kept beating everyone. the games were simple, leave the best cards until the very end, unless and only if you ever need them, then go for it.

bzzz bzzz

you quickly checked the notification that came from your phone trying to not miss what was going on in the game.

"who is it" conrad asks his jaw clenching

"no one," you say giving him a weak smile, it was also none of his business because he doesn't care about you anymore

"sure" Conrad says putting a plus four that is directed towards you. so this is how he wanted to play the game? you grabbed the four cards, getting nothing that would help you against him. it was Cam's turn and he put reverse to try to protect you from Conrad

"your little boyfriend is now your new buddy," Conrad questioned under his breath

"not like you give a shit" you retort back

"you are so clueless," Conrad says making you the most confused person at the party. you just continued to play after the game ended you decided you wanted a coke. so you got up and told Cam you would be back for another round

you walked through crowded groups and at one point you saw Belly makeout with Jeremiah. taking note of that to bring up later. You than saw Taylor with another man who looked like three years older than her. When you finally got your coke you opened it taking a sip going back to the couch

"oh fuck" you let out spilling some of the coke onto your white tube top.

"sorry" you hear a familiar voice come out it was Conrad.

"we have to stop doing this or else we might actually get hurt," you say smiling at the way Conrad was trying to get napkins to clean the mess up. It was no use. your shirt was ruined.

"it's the universe trying to get us together" Conrad blurted out "I'm drunk" he tried to fix the situation, but he was never drunk, he was only ever tipsy.

"drunk words are just sober thoughts" you say looking down at your shorts to see if they were dirty.

"can we talk" conrad asks looking down at you

"yeah" you smile at him

he grabbed your hand and led you outside to the front yard where there were only a couple of people out. he saw that the stain on your shirt only got worse so he gave you his button-up shirt that he never lets go of.

"what's up," you say to him

"the stars look beautiful don't they" conrad was looking up

as a kid, you were obsessed with the moon and the stars. you had a friend that was the stars to your moon. you missed her, and you kept in touch but if you could you would bring her to Cousins. you would always talk about her to the others, knowing they would love her as well. You also face-timed her all the time. Conrad would get mad, saying that you were his for the summer and that she has you all year round. that she was selfish

"it's my time," Conrad says to your friend who was on your phone screen

"con give me my phone," you say slapping him and tugging at his hand

"it's summer byeee" he says as he pressed the red button on the phone

"i hate you," you say to him

"in your sweet dreams you do," he says cockily

"Conrad I thought this was going to be more of a serious conversation," you say trying to shake the idea of the summers you once had with the man standing in front of you

"I miss you," he says to you. sober thoughts. it took you aback it wasn't something you expected from him

"that isn't my fault," you say back with an attitude

"i know, i just got jealous" he said to you

"jealous of what con" he could have grabbed you and kissed you on the spot. he missed that name from your mouth. he craved it every day to the point he would replay voice memos you would send to him back when you two would speak

"of other guys," he said looking into your eyes to see if he scared you off, but all he saw was your face brightening up

"you were the only person on my mind con," you said to him grabbing his hand. if this was a dream, never wake him up. "you were the only thing coming out of my mouth when I was at school, all the guys that you saw hit me up are left on seen, I wanted you, I want you, I always have" you say looking at his face finally tug at his lips to form a smile

"good because I don't want to share," he says leaning down ready to kiss you. As he did he wrapped one arm around your waist the other in your hair tugging at it as you were smiling through the kiss and your hands on both his cheeks.

"get a room" Steven yelled at you two, leading Conrad to release the hand that was in your hair and flipping him off. making you laugh while you both kissed.

"let's get out of here," Conrad said to you

"i can't," you said, you had a job

"fuck the others Steven can drive them," he said in a way that he just wanted you to be by his side

"but how will they get home" you try to reason

"Steven has his keys c'mon let's go to my house, please" he kisses the top of your forehead.

"fine, but if they complain that is your fault," you say pointing at him

"that is fine by me," he says carrying you to spin you around

as you two were getting in the Jeep you started to fasten your seatbelt as Conrad did the same. He looked over at you, seeing how you adjusted the mirrors to get all the angles.

"I think this is the first time I see you drive," he says admiring you, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear

"get used to it con," you say looking at him, melting at his touch

"Oh I will" he whispered

you started the car, you hated driving the Jeep it was so big and excessive. But desperate times call for desperate measures. You played some music in the car for the six-minute car ride. you could feel Conrad's eyes on you the whole time, seeing how you turned and how you checked the mirrors.

as you arrive at their house you park the car and let him get out, you were collecting your things in the car to get out when Conrad opens the door for you.

"thank you" you smile, he closes the door behind you and you lock the car. he holds your hand as he heads over to the front door to open it

"hi conrad" you hear Susannah

"hi y/n nice seeing you two together again," Laurel says from the couch

"glad to be back" you smile at the two adults

"oh you are so beautiful, we missed you," Susannah said

"thank you I missed you too" you smile and let go of Conrad's hand to hug her. She was always so sweet to you

"Mom, she's mine back off, we're going to my room" Conrad says taking your hand again

"bye talk to you guys later" you scream as Conrad is dragging you upstairs

once you got upstairs you see Conrad's door. he opened it with his free hand and led you in. It was still the same. the beach aesthetic and the colors. He had the plush you gave him. it was an orange cat with a pink collar, you named it Lasnaga and you had an orange cat with a blue collar named Garfield. it was funnier when you actually named them.

"oh ignore that" he said looking at the cat

"you still have it" you question, a smile forming on your face

"yeah" it looked like he slept with it and he even still had the perfume you gifted him it was now half empty

"I miss you" you heard from the other line of your phone

"I miss you too," you say back, it was almost Christmas and it was a time when you wished you could go to Cousins, but your mom would say no. "I got you a Christmas present," you say smiling through the camera lens

"yeah, I got it, thank you" One of the gifts was a perfume bottle, it smelled like vanilla and it was your go-to scent "Thank you" Conrad says

"I don't use that scent anymore," you say picking it up

"what" Conrad looked defeated, he was spraying that scent to remember you and you switched scents. he felt betrayed

"I'll get you a new one for Christmas" You smile at him grabbing his hands which made his smile come back

"y/n" he grabbed your attention using his pointer finger to make you look at him

"yes con" one moment you were just staring at his eyes the next thing you knew Conrad was leaning in to kiss you. this kiss was more meaningful as if to pick up from lost time, from the time that was wasted on jealousy and insecurity, because even though it wasn't official that you were Conrad's, you both knew you were meant for one another

Conrad's hands went back to their respective place, one in your hair and the other around your waist. yours were on his cheek and the other in his hair.

"fuck I missed you," he says catching his breath from the kiss

conrad went back but deepened the kiss, it was something that made you happy. You kept smiling through the kiss. you couldn't believe this was happening. Conrad pulled at your hair to make you moan so he could slip his tongue in and fight for dominance, he obviously won; you were still smiling throughout the make out because you couldn’t believe what was happening. Conrad guided you to his bed, he sat on the corner making you straddle his lap.

"are you ok with this," Conrad asked pulling away from the kiss, you could see some of your lipstick on his mouth

"yes, god fuck yes Conrad," you say giggling at the way his face quickly erased his worriedness to pure excitement

Conrad continued his attack, but this time it was on your neck, making sure it would show to others that you were his, that even though people haven't seen you both together for almost two years, you guys are better than ever. Conrad tugged and took off the button-down that he gave you and the dirty tube top. You weren't wearing a bra underneath, and Conrad couldn't be more excited

Conrad carried you off the bed for a second and laid you down on his bed. your hair was perfectly sprawled on the pillow as if it made a halo. Conrad could’ve sworn he saw a little heart that was made from your hair. as you waited for Conrad to take his shirt you got the cat to play around with.

"you're so beautiful," Conrad says going down to kiss you

when he pulls away he takes off your shorts and shoes followed by your socks making you giggle at his fast antics. you were wearing a lace thong that was pink making Conrad smile.

"what's going on in that pretty head of yours,” you say reaching for Conrad's face as he melts into your touch, practically purring.

"you, you're all I think about" Conrad says smiling at you his hand traveling down to your thighs removing your panties too, and then he feels how wet you already are. he licked his two fingers as a lubricant and started to finger you. he slipped two fingers in seeing how tight you were and kept pacing in and out. you followed his fingers as they disappeared and reappeared. sucking on your bottom lip to not draw attention to his room. he looked at your face seeing how it contoured to the way the rhythm, then added more stimulation by massaging your clit.

"fuck Conrad, so good," you say almost screaming as you scratch his back with your nails

"shhh, look at me" Conrad says covering your mouth, but he loved the way your eyes looked at him "Sound so pretty but they can't hear you or the fun is over," he says leaning in to kiss you to muffle your screams.

Conrad soon leaves your mouth to go to your tits to suck on as you grab his hair for extra support. you tugged once and heard a yelp, making you want to fuck him already

he continued with his action. adding fingers as he goes. As he did you gasped, you kept your nails on his back almost drawing blood. conrad was circling your clit with his other hand to speed the process up. he needed you.

“god you’re so tight” he says looking at you with lust filled eyes

Conrad added a third finger as he saw you were about to release and reattached his lips onto yours wanting the fun to continue. he saw the way your body arched off the bed and made sure to continue the pace you were on. to make you orgasm

“look so pretty, come for me” he said spurring you on

“fuck conny” you say pulling at his hair to kiss you and something inside you snapped when he kissed you. you were leaking off his finger. when he looked down in between the two of you he saw the mess grabbing some of your liquid and putting it in your mouth

“fuck so hot” he said going in to kiss you tasting you as well

“my turn” you say with your fucked up makeup and some of your cum on the side of your mouth

“no i just really need you right now” conrad says taking his pants and underwear off as well as everything else.

“i want to be on top” you say to him biting the bottom of your lip

“whatever you want pretty girl” he says grabbing you and putting you on top of him

once you were on top of him you saw how big he was. you grabbed his member massaged him than started to glide him into your heat seeing how he threw his head back in pure pleasure

“stop teasing” he said grabbing onto your wrists and leading his length to your heat

“fuck fisher” you said mad he took all the fun out

“i’m trying to” he retorted making you laugh but that made you sink into him and turned into a loud pornagraphic moan making Conrad startled soon hearing footsteps leading to the door and a knock

“conny is everything ok” you could hear Susannah but this made the experience even better you fucked him up and down side to side to try to make it hard for him to answer his mom

“y-yeah everything is good there’s a porn scene on the horror movie we were watching- fuck” he said yelling to his mom

“oh ok” she says retreating backstairs

“you’re so dead” conrad said to you, but he never meant it. you looked so beautiful riding him as your boobs bounced up and down and saw how your hair was messily parted to the side and fell beautifully over your body. he knew you knew you looked great by the way you bit the bottom of your lip

“god you’re so big” you say looking down at him. putting your hand on his chest for extra support

he couldn’t help admire you. how your tits would go up and down and he had to massage them with his hand. the other was on your waist wanting you to go faster, but he just made your body lay against his as he took your lips with his teeth. his hand that was once on your tits went to your hair and tugged on it earning a low moan from you. the other traced his name on your back adding tickles to make you moan and hopefully come close. once he noticed your body become sloppy he held onto your waist and switched positions with him

“holy fuck that was hot” you said out loud to him

“only for you” he says leaning into your neck to suck on your sweet spot making you moan even more

he saw the way your hair fell back on his pillow. the image he once had of you will forever be tainted by this memory. the memory of him fucking you into oblivion. how his penis would go in and out of you seeing his length covered in white paint from the two of you

he didn’t know that you liked the way his hair fell from his forehead and floated in the air as he fucked you. how his arms would be veiny and how you followed them like a dog to bacon. that every time he wanted to show you something you just looked at his hands.

“fuck me harder” you said to Conrad as you dragged his face to yours to go in for a kiss. he took his free hand and started to massage your clit wanting you to come already.

“come for me again, want to see you come on my dick” he said so close to your face that his hair tickled you, his breath as well. “need you to come for me” his blue eyes following yours and how they were sparkling from pure euphoria

with one last thrust you came for him. his lips covering your mouth and when you were done moaning. his mouth was on your chin ready for another hickey. he nibbled at it. when his thrusts started to become sloppy you started to nibble at his ear. moaning in it to spur him on and saying sweet nothings like “god you’re so big” “taking me so good” “fuck me just like that”

“im yours conny, only yours” was the one that made him shoot his load into you

“oh fuck i’m so sorry” he said as he still kept thrusting into you coming down from his high

“don’t worry about it i’m on the pill” you say looking at his fucked out face and tucking a strand of his hair behind his ear

he leaned in to kiss you deepening the kiss he felt the cum that was leaking outside the two of you. when he was ready to let go you bit the bottom of his lip to see what he would do

“god you’re all i need” Conrad said going back to kiss you. when you both got out of breathe he went into his bathroom to get a cloth to clean you up

“you look beautiful from this angle” Conrad looked at you wanting to take a picture of the way your legs were open for him as the liquid oozed out of you

“get used to it” you said to him as he cleaned you up. he smiled at the thought that this wasn’t a one time thing

“oh i will” he says going to your face and peppering your face with kisses all over

he went over to a drawer he had always designated to you. it had some clothes that you left there when you would stay over. he handed you some shorts you always wore when you were here that did nothing but show your ass, but they were cute; they were white with pink polka dots and tossed you a shirt that was Conrad’s but you always used to use it because it was baggy and had your home state with it.

“i don’t want to wear that shirt today” you said

“what why” Conrad asked puzzled he didn’t do anything to that shirt

“you wear it, not in the mood to wear a shirt” you say to him mischievously. he took the hint as he was putting on some shorts and was ready to go under the covers of his bed making you follow behind

“than neither am i” he said kissing your forehead “some makeup wipes are on the nightstand by the way” he says pointing at the drawer next to you

“thank you” you say taking one and wiping your face off when you were done you threw it away in the trash can that was next to you

“so you never forgot me did you” you asked as you were going to cuddle his chest

“no never” he said looking down at you as he was turning the tv on to watch superbad one of your favorites

“and you never forgot about my things did you” you say giddily seeing what he was doing

“nope, i watched this every time i missed you” he said it as a matter of fact

“kiss me” you say out loud. and he did he leaned down to kiss you as you waited for the movie to load in. he was so delicate this time as if what he did was not him and someone else. that he would always be delicate with you

“you’re all i ever wanted” he said whispering it into you making you smile as the movie played.

you both laughed at the scenes. this movie has seen it all: your childhood, Conrad being by himself without you , and the two of you after you fucked each other. when another funny scene happened and you didn’t laugh Conrad looked down to see you asleep in his arms. your boobs were pressed against his chest and he decided it was time for him to go to sleep as well.

in the morning it was Conrad who woke up first from the rays of the sun. he then saw his clock and saw that it was only 9 am. he decided to just look at you sleep. how you would breathe and how you looked in his arms. the little smile on your face as your dream progressed. god he wished that was him making you smile. Conrad reached for his phone to take a picture of you. knowing this would be a perfect wallpaper. the way the hickeys he left on you were now visible. how you had no makeup but your hair was still as perfect as it was last night and this time noticing the locket necklace he got you from when you were kids on your thirteenth birthday

“thank you Conrad” you say hugging him once you finished opening the box that held the necklace. it was a picture of the two of you from when you were younger when you were both about seven and six.

“you’re welcome. you were practically begging for one all year” he said glad you liked his gift and ever since than you never took it off

he was infatuated with you.

“i’ll never forget you” Conrad whispered into your hair kissing the top of your head

“hey” you say in a raspy voice

“morning” he said back with a big grin on his face

“smells good” you could smell the muffins from downstairs. making Conrad laugh. he looked at you for about thirty minutes admiring you and the first thing you think about is food? “you look pretty con” you said kissing his lips. his hair was messy and his eyes were brighter today. he looked happy.

“so do you” he said smiling at you. if only you knew.

“what time is it” you ask finally rubbing your eyes. when you were done Conrad gave you his phone to look at the clock but the first thing you saw was you. the photo he took this morning. “con did you take this right now” you asked looking into his eyes

“yes do you like it” he asked looking to see if you were mad but he only saw a smile form on your face

“it’s cute i need one now too” you say trying to let go of his grip to get up and get a muffin

“no stay” he says grumpy

“i need one of those muffins, i’ll come back” you say prying at his hands

“fine i’ll race you” he says getting up and trying to find a shirt as you do the same when you did. you ran out the door fighting Conrad downstairs almost falling like ten times.

“woah” you here from downstairs

“i thought we were going to go into war right now” Jeremiah joked

“shut up” Conrad said hitting Jeremiah’s chest

“oh hey y/n didn’t know you were still here” Laurel said

“yeah I accidentally fell asleep to superbad” you say which wasn’t a lie. it was hard to lie to Laurel she could smell bullshit from a mile away.

“wait what happened between you guys” Taylor asked looking at your neck making you hide your hickeys with your hair

“nothing, we just made up” you said looking at her and the last muffin

“more like made out” Belly added which made you send her a death stare which caused you to lose the muffin to Conrad

“fuck you” you whisper to him

“oh but you already did” he said with the most shit eating grin you’ve ever seen as he eats the muffin. when you hit his stomach he hands over the muffin with a loud groan

“thank you” you say kissing him

“eww get a room” Jeremiah said

“we just came out of one” Conrad said as quick as the speed of light making you look at him with wide eyes

“I missed this” Susannah said “y’know ever since you left y/n he has never been this chipper”

“is that so” you say looking at Conrad all this time you thought he was fine especially with all the girls he dated

“so true” Steven added

“we missed you” Belly said. she meant it in the way you could finally be in the same room as all of them without having to walk on eggshells “also Cam told me to give you this” it was your uno cards from the other night

“thank you” you smile at her

“give me another bite” Conrad said as he wraps his arms around your waist and you practically feed him “thank you” he said which followed by an mhm coming from your mouth

“want to go to the beach later” you asked looking up at him to see if he would agree or not

“sure” he replied. making you already excited and smiling back at the muffin before taking a bite and feeding another piece to Conrad

“can we go at night” he questioned

“and skinny dip” you whispered for only him to hear which made him already look forward to see the moon.

“this is seriously cute” Taylor says to Belly who nods

“i love you” Conrad said to you kissing the top of your head as he saw how everyone was so welcoming of the new couple

“i love you more” you say looking up at him which made him kiss you

—-

a/n: part two..??

3K notes · View notes

cinemadaydream · 9 months

Text

Snow on the beach | Conrad Fisher

Pairings: Conrad Fisher x reader

Warnings: smut, protected sex

The drive to Cousins beach house was always one filled with excitement and anticipation, but never as much as you had felt right now on this particular drive on a cold winters night.

Conrad’s hand has been resting on your thigh, rubbing circular motions onto your skin while you were leaning against the window taking the familiar scenery in.

It was odd seeing cousins lit up with Christmas decorations and people wrapped up in jackets and warm clothing instead of swimming suits. You’ve spent every summer here for as long as you could remember but you’ve never been during the winter until now.

Conrad and you planned this trip before winter break and every day seemed to drag by slowly for you until this moment. It had taken everything in you not to run out of the house when he told you he was outside waiting.

You had to be careful not to wake your mom as you snuck out. You left a note on the counter to ease their worries, but you knew your mother was going to be furious with you. Being with Conrad made it hard to care about that at all though. All you could think about was Conrad and how happy you were to be with him again.

It wasn’t much longer before the two of you were pulling into the driveway and hurriedly making your way inside. Conrad immediately goes to start a fire while you grab blankets out of the closet to create a pile on the living room floor for the two of you.

You feel Conrad walk behind you, linking his arms around you to give you the tightest hug he could. “I’ve missed you.” He mumbles against your neck taking a moment to breathe you in.

"I missed you too, Con. So much." You lean your head back against his chest and smile up at him before turning around to wrap your arms around him too. It still doesn't feel like this is real to you. Finally being in his arms again and at Cousins beach together alone. You really didn't want this night to end, didn't want to be anywhere other than here with him in this moment.

"It's snowing." Conrad says and you immediately lift your head up off of his chest to look out of the same window he's looking out of. Your face lights up and you take his hand, rushing over to the window to get a closer look.

"Let's go play in it!" you excitedly say, turning to face Conrad who's looking a bit reluctant at first. But the moment he sees the cute little pout on your face, he can't resist. The two of you rush to the mudroom to put on your jackets. As you do, Conrad and you both are now excited.

The snow on the beach is beautiful. All the times you've been on this beach before, you've never seen it look like this. As you're taking it all in, you don't notice Conrad creeping behind you until he's lifted you up, your legs around his face and you can't help but to laugh. When he sits you down, you two run around chasing each other, playing like two little kids.

By the time you two make your way inside the beach house, the two of you are freezing. Luckily, the fire he started earlier has warmed up the place. The two of you curl up on the floor next to the fire trying to warm up, Conrad placing soft kisses to your neck as you two do this.

"Even your lips are freezing." You laugh as you playfully move away from him. Conrad laughs too before pulling you back to him.

"Thats why I need you to warm them up for me." Conrad smiles before nuzzling his nose against yours. You lean forward, smiling too, before kissing his lips. Unlike any other kisses the two of you have shared before, this one isn't short and sweet. It's urgent and needy, the two of you trying to show the other just how much you've missed each other.

“I’m nervous” you speak softly, glancing at him in the dimmed lit room as he pulls away from your lips to look at you. Your heart is pounding, face flushed. You know this time isn’t like any other moments you’ve had with him. You can feel what’s going to happen tonight and so can he. But only if you let it. It's all up to you, Conrad would make sure of it.

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do, okay? This.. this right here is enough for me. Just being with you is enough for me,” Conrad tucks a strand of hair behind your ear.

The way he looks at you shows just how much he means it, how much he cares about your comfort and wanting to do this right with you. “No. No I didn’t mean I didn’t want to not do it. I do. You have no idea how badly I do. I’m just nervous. I want to do this right."

Conrad nods and he slowly moves his hand to your cheek, cupping your face. "I want to do this right too. We'll go slow. I want this to be all about you, whatever you need is what we'll do."

You smile at him and then your lips are pressed against his again. This time, he slowly moves on top of you as you lay down on pile of blankets you put on the floor. Conrad lets your soft fingers trail under his shirt before he helps you take it off. Then he skims his hands under your own shirt. You lift your arms, allowing him to pull it off of you in one swift movement.

Conrad can't help but to suck in a breath at you in your bra only. He'd been dreaming about this just as much as you have. He knew you were beautiful, but seeing you like this was breathtaking. He almost didn't know how much he'd be able to take. The fact that you'd be fully naked in front of him in a few seconds has his heart beating quickly.

The two of your guy's clothes comes off soon and he's pressing gentle kisses against you before he looks at you for confirmation that you still want this before he takes it any further. The moment you tell him yes, he grabs a condom and puts it on before his cock is slowly entering you as you whine and moan. He's gentle, taking his time and letting you get used to the feeling of him inside of you whispering soft praises against your skin as he uses his mouth and fingers to explore all the parts of your skin he has yet to touch until now.

Soon the uncomfortable feeling fades and the pleasure starts to take over. You roll your hips and Conrad takes this as an okay for him to move inside you. He starts slow and gentle, not wanting to rush things. Your legs wrap around his waist, and you moan against his shoulder as you lose yourself to the pleasure you're feeling.

"You feel so good, y/n" Conrad groans as he continues to thrust inside you, slowly starting to go faster. "So good and all for me."

You can't help but to moan even louder, your whole body filled with desire and love for him. Your arms wrap tightly around his neck, kissing him deeply as you continue to let yourself go and give in to the pleasure that he was making you feel. "Con... I think I'm close."

Conrad nods, kissing and nibbling your skin softly before letting go as he continues to keep moving, your words making him move even faster inside you. "Cum for me then, pretty girl. Want you to before I do."

You moan his name, eyes tightening shut as you feel yourself nearing the edge. He kisses your lips again before your foreheads rest against each other's. He holds you close as you cum. He thrust a few more times in you before he finishes too, both of you panting now. He stills inside of you, but it takes a moment before he very carefully slides out of you, discarding the condom before he lays with you once more, wrapping his arms around you.

"Was it good? Did you enjoy it?" Conrad asks nervously. You can't help the smile on your face, fearing you may never rid of it after what the two of you just did.

"Are you kidding, Con? That was perfect. Feels like I'm flying in a dream" you say softly.

Conrad laughs softy, the nervousness he felt eases and is replaced with love for you, never wanting this moment to end with you. "I'm kidnapping you and bringing you to Cousins more often."

"Sounds good with me." You smile before kissing him once stealing his shirt and putting it on before you snuggle against him.

I've had this in my drafts since December and never finished it but I edited a few parts to be similar to scenes from the show lol. Hope you guys enjoy <3

#the summer i turned pretty #conrad fisher #conrad fisher imagine #conrad fisher x reader #conrad fisher x y/n #team conrad #conrad fisher smut #tsitp #tsitp imagine #conrad fisher x you

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julieloves074 · 2 years

Text

Missing (Conrad Fisher x Y/n)

Summary: Conrad’s rejection to the Deb ball turned out not to be the hardest punch Y/n had to experience this summer, being forced to watch him show up for Belly was much worse

Warnings: swearing, drinking, kissing, sadness, pain, anxiety

Words: 9.8k

(Not my Gif :))

I knew mom was waiting for this moment since I was a little girl, in a way I was excited for it too, especially considering that I was going to be doing it with one of my best friends. Growing up during the summers next door to the Fisher’s and consequently the Conklins was the best thing that could have happened to me. These summers are my whole life, nothing outside them matters, it’s all a pass by, all the count down to summer.

This year I knew would be different, starting with the fact I was going to be a deb, I knew what the Fisher boys’ thought about the whole ordeal but I also knew how Susannah felt about it so I wasn’t worried. I knew I’d have Belly on my side too because she accepted Susannah’s pleas after a little persuasive work from me. It was a little strange to me because Belly is a year younger (16 years old ) than Jere but I also know Susannah knows how to pull some strings, able to get us to do this together.

The Fisher’s and my home may as well have been intertwined, everyone was always in and out of both, doors always open. This wasn’t just something our mom’s implicated though, my mom would always play with Susannah and Laurel when they came to the house when they were smaller as well, these were the kinds of traditions I wanted when I was older, this one specifically I wanted to upkeep.

We’ve been back in Cousins for three days now and everything has slotted right back into place. “Morning Y/n” Susannah said as I ambled through the back door into their kitchen, bright smile on my face, I searched the room for him. The boy that I had been hopelessly in love with since I can remember, also known as one of my best friends: Conrad Fisher.

“How are you feeling about your book party tomorrow Laur?” I asked turning to the women at the table.

“Well I asked Susannah and your mother not to make a big deal of it, but as always they never listen, so as ready as I can be?” she answered in a questioning manner. I knew what Susannah and my mom were preparing for weeks on the build up to this book release, Laurel deserved something big and exciting after all this stuff with the divorce and Susannah’s race against cancer over the last two year.

The two blonde women were not helping themselves though, Suze and mom sat beside Laurel like giddy little school girls, they’re always like this when they’re together, they forget about the whole world around them. In a way they’re like us kids.

“Well Grace and I thought you deserved it!” Susannah said pointedly before taking another sip of coffee and shooting my mom another few nods.

“What about you honey, are you ready for some Deb shopping today?” Laurel asked, more than ready to change the subject of the conversation, “Belly’s just upstairs getting some last bits ready,” she continues.

“You guys know I can never say no to a shopping trip,” I say, the end coming out high pitched, and the three women laughed along with me, but it was Susannah who never left my sight, she could look into anyone’s soul and figure out everything that’s going on with as much as a simple look.

“Jere and Steven left for work already but Con’s upstairs,” she says with a subtle nod, one side of her lips perked up too, mom and Laurel went back to their conversation so I gave Suze a small smile and she only winked back in response.

I jog up the stairs and hear the Belly shuffle around in her room, but decide to walk past her door, ending up a few doors further, from which behind the strums of a guitar fill my ears. I don’t knock just open the door enough to pop my head in.

“Morning Connie,” I say, his head snaps immediately to me and a smirk appears on half of his face, these half smiles run in their family, his an exact reflection of the one Susannah agave me moments ago.

“Are you planning on being a flying head or are you gonna come in Y/n?” he says shaking his head, Con hates when you don’t knock on his door, or wait for an answer before coming in, but he should know we’re past that point now.

“You wanna hit up the pier in a bit?” he asks putting the guitar down next to him, he never wanted to play in front of anyone, not even me, but I knew he could play well, so sometimes it made me go mental in my head about the fact that he was so stubborn.

“How about surfing tomorrow morning? I have to go shopping with Bells and the mom’s today,” I say moving my hand up to push his hair out his face, usually he gets a haircut before the summer, never really short but just enough to make it stay out his eyes- I wonder what made him leave it this summer.

“Ah yes for the,” he switched to a posh voice, “Debutante Ball,” he laughed at himself and I pushed him down onto the bed shaking my head.

“It’s really not that funny,” I say, hiding the irritation in my voice, I knew he disliked these things, they were very stuck in the old ways but I explained it to him so many times, it was something nice for the mom’s and also looked pretty damn good on college applications.

“Come on little sheep, you have to admit it’s a little stupid,” he says, lifting his arm for my assistance, I smack it away with a playful huff, his smile widens and he moves the guitar off the bed before grabbing me and pulling me to lie down next to him. His face centimetres away from mine, we’ve been close like this before, in this exact position during many movie nights but the air tasted different now.

“I’m down for tomorrow, as long as you’re still good for the party tonight? Jere’s being dd,” he mused, brushing some hair out of my face, “so we can finally get hammered together!”

“Not sure we’ll wake up for surfing tomorrow,” I shook my head and turned my face away from him, all of a sudden the eye contact too much.

“It’s fine I’ll wake you up and you know it,” the confidence in his voice made the butterflies in my stomach expand. Conrad was a morning person through and through, no matter how much he drinks, how late he goes to bed or more recently (which I hate) how high he gets he will be awake at seven sharp, if not earlier.

“One of your traits that I don’t particularly love,” I muffle and stretched my arms out, letting out a laugh getting comfy on his bed, I could lie here with him like this for days.

“Shut up Y/n/n you love me for it too,” he says confidently once again, and again he wasn’t wrong but I couldn’t give him that satisfaction, so I scoffed and shook my head instead, “So you’re there tonight right? You’re not gonna stay in with the moms and watch Leonardo DiCaprio movies?” he pulled the puppy eyes and tugged at me to look at them, fingers splayed over my cheek.

“Don’t ever attack DiCaprio again,” I point my finger at him as if I was scolding a little child.

“My sincerest apologies, Leo is great, now say you’re coming,” he pushed, I give him another shove and agree. There was no question about it, I was going to go no matter what, I was not about to miss this party plus he was right the last few parties last year we couldn’t drink tigether because we were switching as designated driver, last year Jeremiah found his love of some new drink and drunk even when he was meant to be driving, it drove us insane.

“You know I’m there Fisher,” I say confidently this time, pushing to sit up.

Con grabbed my arm, “You sure you have to go? I’m sure my mom can find you some clothes,” he whined but I just shook my head. Just looking at him made my heart melt, the way I could easily fall into his arms now, confess this feeling, kiss him, if not for…

“Y/N! Get your butt down here right now we’re leaving!!!!” Belly screamed from downstairs. Belly, one of my childhood best friends, the only other girl in our little families, also had a huge, fat crush on Conrad Fisher, from the minute she knew what the word meant, and from before then I assume.

“See you later Sheep,” Con gave me a wave and a smirk before reaching for his guitar.

“Call me sheep one more time Fisher and you can send out new best friend applications,” I said jokingly, brows lifting accusatorily, he lifts his hands up in defence and laughs, I just stick my tongue out at him and head downstairs, when I arrive I painfully tried to think about anything but Belly’s sad face knowing I was with Con again. Part of my tried to not care, I mean what did she expect, we were friends before she was even born, well I was a baby and he was one year old but still.

Shopping took up a lot than even Belly and I anticipated, so by the time we got back the moms decided we should order pizza for dinner knowing that we wanted to go to a party and they had a long list of films to be watched tonight.

Following our normal regime Steven, Jere and Belly set out the table and after dinner me and Con were left to clean up, the moms insisted on helping us but we ushered them away, mainly because this was usually the only time Con and I would have alone. Yet now he wasn’t excited about explaining some new theory or gossiping about something that happened at a party in Boston. Today we walked around the table grabbing plates in silence, tip toeing around each other.

Confusion fused through my skin in my nerves, he was fine earlier, “You want to talk about it?” I asked trying to sound optimistic, staring at him in hopes of meeting his beautiful, ocean eyes- they were never as bright as Jeremiah’s but they were much deeper, like a hidden world at the deepest point in the ocean, I could never get tired of exploring them.

“What?” he asked looking up confused, rushing a hand through his hair, like waking up from some kind of trans.

“You wanna talk about?” I asked again this time more cautiously.

“Nothing to talk about,” this time he’s more defensive, looking back at the table grabbing the last few things and walking over to the dishwasher. I question prodding the subject further, but something tells me I don’t want to know what’s bothering him.

“I’ll finish up here you probably have to get ready,” he puts on a fake stretched out smile, that doesn’t suit him at all, but doesn’t look up from the dishwasher.

“Are you sure? I’m more than happy to help, we always do this together” I express, hoping, praying that he’ll ask me to stay but of course he doesn’t.

“I just want to get to the party, I don’t want to wait,” he mumbles, I don’t pick apart what he means, whether he’s throwing an insult at me taking long to get ready or whether the only thing that can cure his sudden sour mood is a drink. Either way I set myself ten minutes to get ready just in case it was the first thing- I didn’t need to but I want to prove him wrong.

All in all, I was downstairs ready to go before he was, bearing in mind that he came upstairs a few minutes after me. Con didn’t say anything to me after that, he just got behind the wheel offering to drive there since Jere was driving home afterwards. Jere and Steven quickly run to get in the back, Belly and I pace normally to the car. Slowing down even further when we spot the seat in the front, I think we both had an unspoken hope that this situation wouldn’t happen. I meet her hopefully eyes with dread, we pause for a second.

I think to let her sit in the front but a small part of me feels a sting of jealously so I’m about to take a step towards the front seat before my focus is torn away by Con’s voice “Belly get in the front,” he says patting the seat next to him. All of a sudden a sharp shock passes through my heart, to say I’m taken aback was an understatement, I lifted my head, gifted her a smile and got in the back.

I spent the drive awkwardly stuck between listening to two conversations, now I was the one needing a drink. We never usually had this problem, when Con drove to parties I was always in the front because Belly was too young to go with us, this was new and I didn’t like it one bit.

I headed to the drinks table the second we arrived leaving everyone else behind. I tip the shot of vodka down my throat and pour another right after ready for another pulse of burn.

“Slow down girl or you won’t even be able to hit up the dancefloor with us!” Nicole announced pulling me into a quick side hug, followed by Shayla.

“Stop, no because I need to drown everything out,” I say in an exaggerated way.

“Well in that case, I guess we’re all getting blackout drunk tonight,” Shayla said in her beautiful accent that I would never get over, “A sister never leaves a sister behind,” she raised a shot.

“I love you guys- seriously,” I say flashing them with a thankful look, joining my hands in a pretend prayer, then take a shot alongside them. I’ve known these two as long as the kids from our two houses, I keep in contact with them year round and they’re never not ones for a good time, in all fairness every year we become closer. Right now I’m thankful to my mom for forcing me to make friends outside of the Fishers’ and Conklins’.

Just because Conrad was ignoring me doesn’t mean I wasn’t going to have fun tonight. So that’s what I did, we had a few rounds of shots, then made some drinks so we could go dance, after the two hour mark hit I really thought Con was going to look for me so we could have that drink together he really wanted, but nothing. So, we had another round of shots before Shayla asked, “So what’s up? What are we trying to forget?” I just brush it off knowing that Nicole also thought she had something going on with Con.

“I’m trying to forget remember?” I ask lifting another shot and taking it straight, Nicole excuses herself to go to the toilet, Shayla uses this as an opportunity to grab me and rush outside to the back and question me further.

“Is this about Conrad?” the interrogation begins.

“No, he’s just in some kind of mood suddenly and we were meant to be getting hammered tonight so I’m just doing it without him,” I explain.

Shayla swallows down whatever she wants to say next, but then perks up again with a concerned face, how she’s so composed looking after all those drinks I could never tell but I’m sure as hell slurring my words, “You should tell Nicole nothing’s going to happen between them,” she said but that wasn’t what I was expecting, it pulled me to a stop, I blinked a few times to get a clearer look at Shayla.

“I’m in no place to do that,” I argue

“She’s your friend and your guys’ (Fisher’s and yours), families are practically one big family so I think she deserves to know that you like him, and that he definitely likes you back so she won’t have him,” Shayla explains in a hushed tone.

Shayla knew I liked him before I even told her, one weekend when we were fifteen her parents had to go to England for some emergency meeting so Shayla stayed with us for three days, those days we learnt a lot about each other including the fact that she had an eye for Steven Conklin but said she refused to make a move until he got his life a bit more together- and she pried out that I liked Conrad.

“He does not like me back,” I say with finality, “We’ve talked about this, and right about now I’m in need and dire want of another drink so whether you’re coming with me or not-” I say with a cheeky smile and start walking back towards the glass doors.

Shayla rolls her eyes and walks behind me, “Just think about the Nicole thing, we’ll talk about it when you’re sober,” she says before taking a shot, her eye darting to one of the couches in the front room. My eyes follow hers to spot Con and Belly sat really close to each other, sipping their drinks and whispering to each other in the admittedly loud room.

“Is that why you’re so determined he doesn’t like you?” Shayla semi-whispered into my ear, without as much as thinking about it I nod.

“They get closer year by year, I’m losing him like the grains of sand in an hourglass,”

“I forget you become a poet when you’re drunk,”

“I think he likes her back he’s just too…” I search for the word but fail to find it, “Too Conrad to say it,” I express taking a shot

“You guys have always been attached at the hip when we see you though!” she expressed grabbing passionately onto my arm.

“It’s because Belly was never allowed to go out with us,” I point out, “She’s different this year, everything seems different,” I start to ponder everything.

Shayla quickly realises I’m about to give an analogy on growing up and changing so she pushes another shot into my hand and says “You were right tonight is about forgetting!” we twisted our arms around each other and turned to the dance floor, Nicole was gone for quite a while, we assumed she’d gone to hook up with someone.

Taylor Swift’s ‘Better Than Revenge’ comes on and me and Shay decide to scream it at the top of our lungs while gripping onto each other and jumping around the front room, right in front of Con and Belly- not intentionally (but I was glad it happened) rather because that’s where everyone else was dancing.

It wasn’t for another hour and a half of drinking, dancing and belting out songs that we were interrupted by a tall figure, “Hey Y/n can I steal you for a drink,” the figure asks. I don’t need to look up from Shayla to know who it is.

“Uh a bit busy right now, really getting into ‘abcdefu’ by Gayle maybe later,” I shout over the music, exaggerating the ‘fu’ then breaking out into the chorus of the song, it’s a bit uncomfortable singing in front of him because I love his mom so the ‘fuck you and your mom’ line doesn’t sit right with me. Still he doesn’t move away, I try to ignore him but then the song ends and I’m praying for another one I know well enough to where I can use it as an excuse.

Just as if the universe hates me the next song is kind of dead and Shayla says she might pee herself if she doesn’t get to a bathroom right about now. I curse her for it, not quite sure if she was being honest or not.

“Come on let’s grab a drink outside,” he says laying his hand on my arm and pulling me towards the drinks table, I let him pour me some drink before pulling me out to the front, most people sat in the back so it was somewhat peaceful on this side of the house, he sat down on the swing but I stood beside it leaning against the wall.

“Wow not even going to come sit next to me I see how it is,” he says, usually this was the key to make me sit down but drunk Y/n was stubborn as hell, probably more than him, “Ow wow come on what is with you?” he runs a frustrated hand through his hair.

“Well I was having a fun time dancing with Shayla and you’ve made me come sit outside in the dead silence,” I comment looking out into the street filled with cars, spotting Jere’s jeep with no problem, still perfectly fine right ahead on the opposite side of the road.

“Thought we were drinking together tonight?” he asks

“Yeah me too,” My voice quick, sassy, snappy

“You’re the one who practically ran out of the car,” he accused turning his whole body my way

“You were ignoring me- and don’t act like you didn’t have company,” I say

“Fucks sake Y/n, you’re being jealous of Belly right now? Seriously?” he laughed and it boiled my skin over again.

“I’m not jealous I was having a good time,” I shrug taking a chug

“It’s her first party, she was hoping for someone who she knows to be there with her at least in the beginning,” he explained running a hand over his forehead, some guilt did flood my brain, I forgot that Belly has always stayed with the moms to the point where she didn’t really know anyone outside the circle. On the other hand in this state I couldn’t be bothered to use my brain- or well couldn’t focus on anything for too long or the fuzz started to ache.

“Come sit down and give me this deserved drink together,” I push off the wall at his words but then Jeremiah bursts through the front door with Belly and Steven in the middle of them, drunk out of his mind.

“There’s cops on the way, we need to get out!” he quickly announced I let out an annoyed huff and went for another chug of my drink, the bottom containing the most alcohol I pulled a face and threw the red cup on the floor. Attempting to stay up while walking down the stairs but failed quickly, Con grabs onto my arm and hooks it around his shoulder- I try to push him off but give up realising I’d rather avoid getting any drunk bruises this early into the summer.

“I think at least you’ve completed our goal- somewhat,” he laughs helping me into the back seat getting in beside me, Steven on my other side. Belly sits with Jere in the front. When we arrive the front room lights are still on but as we walk in we realise that all the moms have fallen asleep on the couch. Everyone’s getting their shoes off and heads upstairs but I head straight to the back doors.

Seeing the beach and ocean felt like a nice idea at two in the morning.

“Where are you going?” Con asks from behind me as I pull open the doors. I turn around and flash him a smile, that’s answer enough, the beach’s been our escape for years, “I’ll go with you,” I hear faintly from behind me as I run towards the beach.

The sand feels amazing under my bare feet so much so that I lift hands widely into the air and scream into the universe “WOOOOOO!” before turning around and running my hands through my hair, the rush of the night waves better than any music, Con laughs watching me.

I fall back onto the sand, sitting comfortably looking up at the sky full of stars, “I love the beach at night, it’s so much better than in the day,” I announce to no one particularly, apart from the fact that Con is right next to me now.

I turn to face him, his gaze at my face is so intense, in this light his eyes seem almost as dark as a blackhole, he brushes some hair out of my face, her fingers lingering there for a moment, I swallow down and look at his lips by accident and back to his eyes, biting into my bottom lip from embarrassment at how oblivious that made me look. His thumb fell down to my lips, he freed my bottom lip from my teeth.

“Conrad,” I whisper into his hand, he closes his eyes and his lips part, he moves forwards slightly to where I can feel his breath on me. I push forwards, nose to nose, breathing heavily, he’s the one to give the final push, bringing his lips to mine.

As if created to do just this my hands rush to his hair. His other hand places hold onto my hip squeezing it comfortably. It feels warm and amazing and comfortable. The butterflies in my stomach freed from their cage for the first time, running wild and free in my stomach, my hands, my lips. He pulls away fast, retracting his hands back to himself, I brush my hair behind my ears and run my hands over my face which was no doubt red as roses.

“Lets head back,” he says getting up, I assume it’s because he doesn’t want to do this drunk, the thought of this happening again makes me more sober, I jump up and follow him. He doesn’t speak, maybe he’s too busy thinking about what the hell just happened. He walks me to my back door and watches as I lock the door before leaving for his own house. As I take off my makeup the smile doesn’t disappear off my face, it does though when I retch before heading to bed, falling asleep in an instant, replaying the last few events over in my mind.

----

The next I wake up to the smell of pancakes, I take a deep breath in through my nose, the sweetness filling my body up whole. As I lay there with my eyes closed smiling, ready for my favourite breakfast a reminder of yesterday comes to me, the same smile clouded my face- for a very different reason though. Last night I kissed Conrad Fisher, last night Conrad Fisher kissed me. It was all like a fever dream.

Pulling my phone off the bedside table I notice the time, it was twenty to ten in the morning, this was late for me. Not that I was expecting there to be some huge love confession as a text from Con but there was nothing, not even a silly ‘good morning’. Maybe he was still asleep, though that would be rare, being a morning bird like myself.

“Y/n! Wake up honey!” I can hear my mom from downstairs.

“I am mom! I’ll be down in a sec!” I reply, brushing the lack of message on my phone and throw on some shorts and a cropped top before rushing down for a warm breakfast.

“This is delicious as always mom, how was the film night?” I asked eagerly hoping she wouldn’t ask me about last night, I hadn’t decided yet what I wanted to tell her.

“It was really good honey, you know I love eating with you but I’ve got to rush off- there’s still some things Susannah and I have to set up for Laurel’s book signing tonight,” she kissed my forehead grabbing the car keys and rushing out the back door through to the garden next door.

After I cleaned up I followed in her steps and made my way to the Fisher’s, which I would have done earlier but again… pancakes.

“Heyyyy Y/n!” Jeremiah shouts up from the pool where him and Belly are throwing around a beach ball “You coming in for a morning swim?” he asks with a grin taking a step towards Belly, my eyes narrowed the tiniest amount but I quickly shook it off.

“No- um I’m actually looking for you brother?” I say in a question tone, Jere’s brows furrow and he looks to Belly who simply shrugs.

“He left early this morning, none of us were even awake yet,” his tone apologetic, I stood there for another moment thinking of whether he’d told me he had anything going on today, I must have zoned out because when I come back into conscious I witness Jere being more touchy than usual with the younger Conklin, hands on her hips and all.

I don’t say anything more, they were clearly lost in some their own little world. Had something happened between last summer and now between these two- because last time I checked the dark haired girl was in deep for the older Fisher brother, I mean I was not about to complain if she decided that Jeremiah was actually the one for her.

Steven had also snook out in the morning according to Laurel, except they knew where he were, he asked Shayla if he could take her to see the sunrise this morning, he’d found an amazing spot near the end of last summer, where you could see the perfect glow of the oranges and yellows as the day began. How Shayla could be bothered to wake up that early especially after all those drinks last night I would never know.

So now it was just Laurel left in the house, I offered to bake something with her while talking about new book releases, it didn’t feel right to leave her all by herself on her day. After that we sat in the front room just talking, it was nice, Laurel and I hasn’t had a time to catch up like this, just the two of us, in a while.

Conrad didn’t come home for hours, to the point where I had to excuse myself and head home to get ready for the event, I offered to stay and get ready with Laurel so that I could catch Con when he’d come in but she said she’d be fine and that she’d see me at the bookstore. I complied with a smile but let out a sigh of disappointment down my throat.

I put on a new red dress that mom and I found in an “side of the highway” shopping centre in the literal middle of nowhere, I curled my hair and put on some mascara- nothing much, we were in Cousins Beach after all and here everyone walked with surfing, beach wave hair and clear faces sun burned.

Mom came home just in time to get changed and drive us to the event. All of the other kids were already there when we arrived, I said hi to the owner before making spotting Conrad around the corner smiling at something, at first I thought it was at a book he was holding. I started coming up with every possible question about the book I could ask to get a normal conversation flowing- all of a sudden I didn’t know how to talk to one of my best friends.

Then I rounded the corner and saw Belly standing next to him telling something which consisted of her flailing her hands around animatedly, laughing and smiling. I strained my ear only to overhear “No that second song you played me on the guitar earlier was so much better than the other one”. My arms dropped dead at my sides- he played on his guitar for Belly, after refusing to play for me for years.

“Hey Y/n!” A voice called behind me before I could figure out what to say to the people in front of me.

“Hi Austin,” I said tying with all my might to give some enthusiasm, yet I could hear that I was failing miserably. Austin was lovely, black midnight hair, pearly white teeth and a golden smile but there was something about him. The poor boy didn’t seem to get a hint, for the last three summers he’s tried asking me out and I’ve been avoiding him. Not to be mean but I just don’t have it in my heart to wound his. Don’t get me wrong he’s hot and has the personality of an angel with a sprinkle of spice for flavour and adventure but he wasn’t- he wasn’t Conrad.

“How have you been?” he asked reaching out to touch my arm, I pulled away absentmindedly making it look as though I was fixing up my hair.

“I’ve been busy, you know all these extra after school clubs and voluntary events,” I said.

“Yeah you did mention over message back in… what was it… like March,” the point he was making was awkward but the way he said it was exactly the opposite, he was always optimistic and for some reason it was just too much for me. That started him off on a long rant- what he said was a ‘catch-up’ for all the missed texts- which didn’t stop until Susannah tapped a little teaspoon on her glass of champagne. I thanked the gods and Susannah in my head. This was my chance for an escape, so I took it.

“This is to my best friend and another of her wonderful achievements, Laurel you are a wonder so please enjoy this and here’s to your current book and the next one!” she announced picking her glass up, everyone within the small store followed, and everyone drank. I scanned the busy room again, this time to find Conrad sitting on the couch, drink in one hand phone in the other.

Belly, Jere and Steven were trying to pile as many books on Steven’s head as possible so I took this chance too. Sitting down next to Con I looked straight ahead.

“Hey,” I let out after a second of silence.

“Hi,” he said back.

“What were you up to today I came looking for you,” I started giving a second of space for him to say something but nothing came out so I continued “You know for our surfing session,”. He didn’t as much as look up from his phone.

“Hey can I ask you something?” I said into the awkward space between us.

“Shoot,” he murmured.

“I um- don’t know if this is coming out of nowhere or whether I’m totally overthinking this but I was wondering whether um-“ for some unknown reason, which I hated, I couldn’t get my words out with Con today, everything felt thrown of its axis within our little bubble, “Would you wanna be my escort for the Deb ball?” I got the words out quietly turning my whole body to face him.

He looked up startled at my question, “Y/n-”

“I mean I know you said you were never going to one of those but I figured that after we kissed last night that maybe you’d do it for me?” it all fell out of my mouth like vomit.

Conrad’s eyes opened wider, his mouth slightly ajar as if he was just spoiled for an upcoming movie, “We should talk outside,” he murmured getting up, at this I started to worry. The air was getting chilly now and I didn’t bring a jacket, Con was wearing one of his zip-up jackets pulling it closer as we stood in front of the window to the bookstore.

“I’m not going to be your escort to the ball, I said I was never going to go to one of those and I meant it-”

“You went with Nicole last year,” my voice perked up.

“Yeah because my mom forced me, I was the only one who knew the waltz, I’m not being a sheep” he argued somewhat defensively now.

“Ok that’s fine,” I say even though it’s not fine, another insult to my face “I just assumed that because we kissed last night you’d do it for me,”

“I don’t remember that, I was so fucked in the head drunk,” he interrupted

“What-” my brows furrowed in confusion and my throat felt like a desert all of a sudden so I shook my head, trying to clear my memory of the event, “You always remember everything when you drink, you said it yourself,” I challenge

“Well what do you want me to say?- Sorry,” his voice half-bothered looking anywhere but my eyes.

“No, what do you mean- I” I didn’t know what to say to him, my heart felt like it was made out of glass, like it was thrown angrily onto the kitchen floor in the middle of a fight, smashed into pieces so small that they couldn’t even be put back together with the world’s strongest glue.

“It didn’t mean anything, I’m not going to the stupid, sheep deb ball with you, I don’t know what else you want me to say,” he said in a final tone and finally looked at me, his eyes showing no emotion, it made me feel small and stupid. I was never one to foolishly believe in something so quickly and easily, but that kiss last night- I was sure it had meant something.

I couldn’t open my mouth to respond, even if I could I wouldn’t be sure what to say, I just shrunk beneath his gaze until I felt like I was in drowning in the concrete. Con turned around and made his way back inside, through the window I could see him pouring himself a drink and making his way to a hidden away corner of the store.

It wasn’t until he was completely out of my sight that I felt like I could breathe. What had just happened, this had to be a fever dream. Another strong breeze danced by pulling a shiver from my body. I made my way back inside, poured myself a drink and stood in the middle of the store. Everything foreign all of a sudden I didn’t know where to place myself, who to talk to.

Susannah always believed from the moment my mom found out she was pregnant that I was going to be destined for one of her boys, now I’m standing in the middle of the our only book store in town wondering whether she knew how wrong she was, or maybe if this is some cruel obstacle in the road.

----

After that night Con and I didn’t speak to each other very much, he didn’t try to reach out and I didn’t know how to speak to him without feeling a stab of pain and confusion and embarrassment. He’d be normal when our families were together, but there was never a moment when we were alone, if he could feel that’s what was going to happen he would evacuate the situation. It made me feel sick, ugly, like some kind of disease he was scared of catching.

By the time another party came around, literally like three days later I was drinking to my broken heart’s content, so wrapped up in Conrad’s rejection that I gave in and danced with Austin which quickly turned into drinking with Austin and sneaking outside with Austin. I thought he would try to kiss me, we sat on the person’s swing, my legs over his, his one hand on my thigh but he didn’t try.

He talked, about himself and asked questions about me, but I didn’t want to talk so I leaned my body towards his, hands to the back of his neck pulling him towards me like a siren enchanting a sailor but he pulled away. The rejection feeling a little too much like Con’s a few days ago- like salt in a fresh wound, I pulled away, my feet hitting the solid ground, arms on my knees, head in my hands- maybe it was about me.

“Hey, hey, hey-“ Austin said pulling my hands away from my face, moving closer to me, looking right into my eyes, then my lips and back to my eyes, “I want this- I want you, but not like this, not when you’re drunk. I don’t know what’s changed so that you finally gave me some time of day but if it’s just because you’re drunk I don’t want to kiss you like that,” he explained, his thumb soothing my hands.

This made me feel even worse, he was right I was just trying to get someone’s attention, to prove to myself that I wasn’t disgusting, that I could be liked and he was an easy target since he already liked me. Tears started falling down my face, I was embarrassed and hurt and drunk and my period was not helping my hormones, I told Austin I wasn’t feeling well and that I was going to go home. He offered to drive me home, “No you stay and have fun, don’t cut it short on my account,” I argued but he brushed me off, “You and your wellbeing is so much more important to me,” he expressed.

I was convinced I was about to throw up, why did he have to be so nice. I walked through the house looking for Jere, telling him that I was going home, he looked concerned and said he’d take me and come back for the others but I told him I had a way home and he gave me a reassuring smile, the whole time I felt eyes on me, I turned around and there was Con whispering to Belly. It was so loud I practically had to shout to talk to Jere but the thought of his breath on her ear was unpleasant, he wasn’t looking at me, neither was she. My unconscious was trying to torture me too.

The next morning I hoped I could forget about my stupidity from the night before but Austin rocked up at my door with my favourite drink and good muffins, I thanked him and we ate and drank out back near the pool. After this we started talking and hanging out more and more, but every free moment I still had someone else on my mind. When the time came for the dancing lessons for the deb ball I had no other choice, I brushed Fisher out of my mind (that’s a lie- I just tried to ignore the ache) and asked Austin to be my escort that was when he kissed me for the first time and I felt absolutely nothing. I didn’t say a word I just pressed a smile onto my face.

At the first rehearsal I spotted Jere coming in with Belly, that’s when they confirmed my suspicion, while Jere was catching up with Austin, Belly gave me a wrap up of the last few weeks including the steamy make out in the pool. This really made me realise I wasn’t very present in the Fisher household these last few weeks, I distanced from my friends, spent more time with Austin, hiding, pretending.

I gave Jere a nod and a smile he had mentioned to me about these feelings he was having for Belly last year, he said he wasn’t sure what they were and whether he would want to go there but now looking at his smile it was so obvious that he was in love with her.

---

It was the moment that I was dreading, waking up the morning of the ball. Mom was feeling the exact opposite rushing into my room at the ripe time of seven in the morning, I was already awake, the nerves didn’t let me sleep but I just wanted to stay hidden under the covers for the whole day.

“Come on honey, you need to get up, you’ve been waiting for this moment all summer,” she said, I peeked my head from under my covers and a smile spread over her face, she gestured a plate towards me “Your favourite,” she said before I reached out for. As quickly as she came in she was gone again. Usually, mom was pretty good at spotting when something was wrong but she was so wrapped up in Susannah and Laurel this summer that my summer life falling apart slipped passed her like august.

To this day Conrad and I still hadn’t talked properly, we shared small talk and he gave a few weak smile from across the room when the families were together, still seeing him made me ache. I didn’t drive with them to parties, Austin took me, not that I went to very many anymore I couldn’t face seeing Conrad make out with random girls in the corners of the room.

My phone buzzed on my side table, “Good morning bestie, today’s the big day- your white dress ready?” the text message from Belly read, we were still fairly alright, but she never once questioned why I stopped coming over so often, she didn’t make an effort either.

‘You’re making it sound as if we’re getting married,’ I replied shoving a load of pancake into my mouth, the syrup melting some of my distress.

‘Omg true, who knows maybe one day we’ll have a double wedding’ she wrote and then a few seconds later another text came through ‘Actually never mind neither of us want to share a special day like that haha,’ I didn’t answer her back just mulled around in bed for another half hour before finally getting up and packing up everything I needed to take to the Country Club today.

I thought it was silly we had to get there so early, I dressed in something good enough just in time for Austin to text me that he was waiting outside. When we arrived Paige was rushing us around with a rehearsal call out and pointed out who was sat where, Jeremiah never once took his eyes of Belly, at one point she tripped over Shayla’s foot when we were getting into the lines for the dance and the whole room burst into laughter- even Paige broke into something of a smile.

After three hours of this and that she had us gather and sit on the mini stage, Belly came to the sit next to me, Austin on my other side laying his arm around my shoulders, it felt imprisoning, I felt trapped with no way of escape. I took a deep breath in and closed my eyes as Paige started speaking.

“Well um, this has been a time of ups and downs ladies, but I am proud to say that I’ve had somewhat of a pleasant time getting to know each one of you, building on your strengths and turning your weaknesses into something to work on, you’re the best lot I’ve had in a few years” she starts and Belly turns to whisper into my ear.

“Nicole would not be happy to hear that,” she whispered with a giggle, Nicole was doing some workshop thing for her future university this morning so she wouldn’t be here until this evening, but the other older sisters clapped and laughted, I opened my eyes when Paige continued.

“So I say this with honesty, I may never break into huge grins or laughter but this was a pleasure, I will miss you all dearly so make me proud tonight, but most of all make yourself proud, you are all bright young women,” she finished giving us a little clap.

“What about us?!” Jeremiah asked with an appalled expression, this did bring out a small laugh in the Deb organiser.

“Yes Jeremiah how could I forget, you gentlemen have been fairly good partners, apart from the time Jeremiah decided he was tried of ballroom dancing and decided to get to know Alexa,” she gave him the side eye and everyone laughed again, I just felt Austin pull me closer at this. Like vines with pricks wrapping around my throat like a snake.

“Excuse me,” I said louder than I intended and rushed out the room, Austin tried to go after me but I head Jere say “Give her a minute, Belly will go,” before I was out the door.

Only when I was out in the fresh air could I breathe, what was happening to me? I never had problems like this, the feeling of a balloon blowing up slowly in my chest, taking over every edge of space- no space to breathe- and I can’t do anything about it. This build up, until- until. Then nothing.

I rubbed me fists over my eyes taking deep breaths in and out.

“Y/n,” the voice was gentle, and with my eyes closed I could almost pretend it was Conrad, laying a soft touch on my shoulder, my brows furrowed, I hoped it was my mom coming to my rescue but when I opened my eyes with was Shayla stood over me, “Let’s talk, we’ll drive to get coffee come on,” she suggests, tugging gently on my arm.

“We’re not meant to leave the property,” I say back, she brushes me off.

“Y/n you’ve not really been around lately,” her tone pleading and then I couldn’t stop it, the tears dropping, “Oh come on sweetie, I’m here,” she said wrapping her arms around me, running her hands down my hair.

After a few minutes we made it to her car, I rubbed the tears away and started explaining everything starting with the end of that stupid party where everything fell apart. Shayla just listened, exactly what I needed, what I didn’t realise I needed. She gave tips of advice when she felt was right and gave nudges of encouragement too.

By the time we got back to the Country club the girls were already getting ready, some already had their hair done, some their makeup but it was fine because we still had plenty of time. Belly gave me a looking asking ‘are you okay?’ and I just gave her a nod.

After we finished our makeup I did Shayla’s hair, curling up the end of her ponytail, then she twisted and turned mine into a beautiful bun near the nape of my neck. Time flew by before I knew it, soon enough I was changed into my dress and it felt a million miles away from this morning, but at the same time as though I was still laying in bed mere minutes ago.

There was a knock on the door and Paige’s voice came through, “Do you ladies want a group picture in the vanity room? We’re starting in a few minutes,” she communicated. Gigi excitedly opened the door and we had a little photoshoot even convincing to get Paige in a few on a timer.

“Now, let’s go,” she said ushering us out, Shayla and I at the end, she reached for my hand and gave it a tight squeeze, shooting a smile in my direction and giving me a nod.

“You’re beautiful, inside and out,” I whispered.

“You’re amazing too Y/n, now let’s kill this thing,” I nodded and meagre minutes later were stood in a line on the girl’s side of the stage’s wings. Belly’s in front of me, her name about to be called, and all of a sudden a feeling of pride and butterflies fulfils me, I was making my mum proud, and Laurel and Susannah, but most importantly myself, no matter how rough and isolating this summer felt I got through it.

Before I knew it Belly was walking out meeting Jeremiah who didn’t take his eyes off her, it made a piece of my heart melt. Then there was Austin, waiting to meet my eye, he gave me a reassuring smile and nod, I looked away waiting for Paige to announce us.

“Y/n L/n,” she called and then started listing my plans for collage and the charity events I’ve participated in, I walked out, not looking at Austin once, my sight searching for my mom. I spotted her to the left at our table, Susannah right next to her, then there was him. Conrad Fisher. I pleaded with my eyes to look away, even if only to Laurel who sat on the other side of him or to my dad who sat next to Belly’s. Con didn’t meet my eyes he was looking straight at Belly and Jeremiah and that’s when it hit me. It was Belly. It was always going to be Belly.

I was fine until I felt Austin’s tug on my arm, Paige was about to announce Shayla and Steven. After those two we were allowed to just wander around, greet everyone, my mom had a hold on me before I could blink, she had tears in her eyes.

“You’re growing up Y/n/n,” she said in panic, “You’re still my baby though,” she turned to my dad, “Are we getting old Michael, am I getting old?” she overexaggerated.

“No honey you still look fine like wine,” he complimented, I wanted to gag, how they were still so in love I didn’t know. Dad come to Cousins for the last two weeks of summer like he always did after a week trip with his old college buddies, it was nice having him here for again.

“Oh Austin don’t you just look gorgeous too!” mom exclaimed going to give him a hug too, my parents became very fond of Austin very quickly though dad did seem to express some confusion, I had been talking to and about the Fisher boys all year but after a barbeque with Austin and his parents he was sold.

“You’re a good young man Austin, I can’t wait to see your dance now, Jeremiah tried to teach me some of the moves yesterday,” he explained, Austin laughed while my dad tried to impersonate Jeremiah and I visibly face palm.

“Ok, ok, ok my turn to hug my adoptive daughter,” Susannah announced, mom and dad step away and quickly I’m in her embrace smiling into her shoulder, “You look beautiful sweetie, and even though you’re not here with a Fisher boy like I expected,” she paused awkwardly, hanging onto her last few words, “You have a wonderful time, you’ll have to invite Austin and his parents to our last night barbeque tomorrow,” she said excitedly.

“Susannah- I don’t-” I start but she flashes her puppy eyes first to me, then to Austin stood next to me.

“We’ll be there,” he said with a smile and guilty eyes looking to me.

“Fantastic!” Susannah exclaimed before turning to discuss details with my parents. Laurel hugs me then Belly’s dad makes sure to give me some motivational comment, Conrad give me something of a smile and a quick side hug which I don’t have the strength in my arms to reciprocate, when it comes to him I lose all control.

After everyone takes their seats again Austin whispers in my ear “I do love you parents,” he said.

“They love you too, actually they have obsessions with you,” I laugh.

“And now it’s time for a very special dance,” Paige announces over the microphone, everyone turns to her with excitement, “No not the dance where your little girls become young women, the boys have prepared something first,” she says and now everyone seemed even more excited.

The music come on and all the boys make their way onto the dance floor in beat, Shayla and I stand hand in hand, Belly on my other side and we watch, laughing, we were not allowed to see this dance before today, it was meant to be a ‘treat’ for us girls but Jeremiah was so excited that he practically showed us most of the dance moves already. Though now that it was all happening together before our eyes I couldn’t deny that it was actually pretty good.

Conrad’s eyes were stuck on his brother, I wouldn’t call the emotion jealousy but there was something there, he only just broke away to look at his phone, that’s where his sight stayed for the rest of the dance and into the conversation that broke out on our table afterwards. Shayla came rushing to the table saying that we needed to get more photos, which mom and Susannah were more than happy to take, I had some with Belly, then Austin and some of the other girls.

After a few minutes of taking pictures Paige was back on the microphone announcing that the main event was about to begin. The introductory music began to play, every was making their way to their place in lines Belly was stood looking around the whole room, searching.

“Has anyone seen Jeremiah?” She asked, looking desperately at me then Shayla, we both shook our heads, how did we not notice him slip away. Belly awkwardly played around with her glove before facing our table, was she going to sit out of the dance?

That was when it happened, Conrad stood up, it was as if time had stopped, he was making his way towards her, reaching for her hand. I felt the phantom pain in my palm as if it was me he was touching, I tried not to wince at the cold sensation.

Then we’re dancing, Austin’s body heat all over my space but my eyes don’t leave Belly and Conrad. Jeremiah is going to be pissed, as if on command in the corner of my eye I see him walk in, his jaw drops subtly as he watches the same scene unfold in front of him.

Even after the dances finishes they don’t move apart, they’re stood there like the only two people in the world, staring into each other’s eyes. A hand went to my heart, nails digging into my collarbone. It was one thing getting rejected about the dance- since he did say he wasn’t going to do it beforehand, but kissing me and now being here smiling at Belly like she was the only girl he ever had eyes for, after dancing with her felt like animals ripping at my heart, all trying to get a piece, shredding it apart. Why did he ever kiss me? It ruined everything I could have always lived in blissful ignorance.

Susannah always believed from the moment my mom found out she was pregnant that I was going to be destined for one of her boys, and then just a little over a year later when Laurel got pregnant too Suze said that she was also destined for one of her boys. Now I stand here wondering if she could have ever predicted that both the Fisher boys would fall in love with Belly and I would be the one watching, drowning in my own sorrow. Missing him.

After being frequently requested: Part Two

MASTERLIST

#conrad fisher #conrad fisher imagine #conrad fisher x reader #conrad fisher x y/n #conrad fisher x you #jeremiah fisher #jeremiah fisher x reader #jeremiah fisher x y/n #jeremiah fisher x you #the summer i turned pretty #the summer i turned pretty x you #the summer i turned pretty x reader #the summer i turned pretty imagine #tsitp jeremiah #tsitp x reader #tsitp imagine #tsitp fanfic

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