99% of hockeyman "fans" are just too gd dumb to see what the highly skilled and clever minchy is doing out there. All they think is "goal? Good player. No goal? Bad player. Trade." These idiots forget that mitch is a very recent👏 selke👏 finalist👏 and only lost to The Patrice Mothafuckin Bergeron
Jonas siegel just wrote an article about what minchy is doing in these playoffs, not what he's not (scoring goals) and yup here we go, buckle up bitches bc the comment section of the athletic did not heed directions, and sadly they've all recently fallen on their heads and keep repeating "disagree" and nonsense derogatory insults while slamming their own heads into the concrete walls of scotiabank like incorrectly stimulated NPCs
Ok so what is mitchy's line doing out there?
Minchy mouse is doing the dirty necessary work not the pretty highlight reels work:
Sheldon:
Mo:
Why's minchy doing this? Simple. He's doing it for his big gorgeous man:
Naturally you're still thinking "Ok yes yes he is doing the lord's work on his own line in the D-zone but i neeeed to see him back with auston in the O-zone🙏😭 i need to see my beautiful soulmates (teammates) making tender love (playing hockey) with multiple orgasms (full-time in the offensive zone) and giving birth to adorable babies (scoring goals)" and i give you this:
Sheldon well aware he needs to give both the people and auston what they want and lets em out together here n there and has done so since the beginning of this series, so i think we can rely on seeing some 3416 in most games, just maybe not in set lines bc they need his D skills more
Final thoughts:
MINCHY MARNIE MOUSE IS A FUCKIN BADASS LITTLE CREATURE DOING ALL THIS WHILE STANDING ONE MIGHTY APPLE TALL ON SLIPPERY ICE
‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
does he need to score more, even up against b's top line? Sadly yes, but no one's worried
Rest easy babes. Mitch marner's taking care of his big papi and his boys🙏
I kept most stats and example plays out but if you're interested in the details, article's here👇
a hockey player bleeding sluttily can be so personal...
in order: calle jarnkrök, zdeno chara, yanni gourde, evgeni malkin, travis konecny, tye kartye, ryan lindgren (x2), jack drury, tom wilson, john marino, nathan mackinnon, matt rempe, jamie drysdale, nicolas deslauriers, trent frederic, anders lee, patrice bergeron, morgan rielly, anders lee, connor mcdavid, tyson jost, kris letang