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one-boring-person · 4 years

Note

Hey I was wondering if you could maybe write something where David meets his just turned vampire mate, after she gets hurt, scared and chased by the Frogs or some other hunters? I'm really in the mood for some angsty stuff😂 💕💕💕

Gotta love some good old angst! Thank you for requesting, I hope this is satisfactory!💛❤

Goddamn Hunters.

David (The Lost Boys) x reader

Warnings: violence, blood imagery, vague mentions of death

Masterlist.

A sharp yelp escapes me as my knees connect with the pavement yet again, a familiar pain spiking up through the thoroughly abused muscles of my legs, a sensation which still surprises me, seeing as I should be able to heal in no time. Breathing harshly, I scramble back to my feet, ignoring the protest of my legs and lungs, focusing on the adrenaline racing through my system as I sprint along the deserted road, newly enhanced eyes searching for a place to hide, sensitive ears picking up the sound of my pursuers behind me, their taunting voices mingling with the other, more distracting noises of the night, music from the Boardwalk somehow audible to me, even though I'm a good twenty minutes away. All of this, combined with the vibrant scents and putrid stenches of the town around me disorients me, sending my head into yet another spin, my terror and panic not doing anything to help with this, only adding to the hysteria going on inside me.

I have no idea who the two older men who are chasing me are, but the two younger ones? Those two I know very well - Edgar and Alan Frog, my ex-friends. They'd found me roaming the Boardwalk, scratching at my ears and eyes, overwhelmed by the barrage of strong smells and loud sounds, as well as the overbearing need to feed, completely thrown off and unsuspecting when they lured me away from the crowd, back to their new friends, who promptly started trying to pin me up against a wall, stakes brandished under my chin. None of them expected me to fight, and honestly, neither did I, but my instincts kicked in and I was able to wriggle my way free, allowing me to run off, away from the danger. Their voices are harsh and gloating, aware that I'm not as old as they might've originally thought, this idea giving them an incentive to let the hunt last longer than it should, keeping their eyes on me as I continue to hurtle along the streets, trying to remember how I'd managed to make myself fly the night before.

I turn a corner, skidding on the tarmac as my shoes struggle to get a grip, nearly sending me flying into a cluster of bins a couple of metres away, my hands flinging out to catch myself before that can happen, grazes appearing on the soft skin there as I use them to push me upright again, only to stop suddenly when I realise that the road I've entered is a dead end, my heart dropping in my chest, panic and despair flooding me, their voices and footsteps coming ever closer. Clenching my fists, I turn back to the corner I turned round, breathing heavily through my parted lips, the cool air feeling odd against my sensitive gums, my fangs threatening to push through them again, it I try to repress this urge, remembering the pain that accompanied them last time, my eyes fixed on the road, blood starting to well up in my palms from where my nails are digging into my flesh. Terror courses through me, my breath hitching as I see my pursuers finally round the corner, wide grins forming on their faces as the spot me, their pace slowing into cocky strides.

"Well, well. Look what we have here." One of the older men, a scarred man with long, oily black hair and only one eye, comments, whistling lowly at my appearance.

"You get the wrong turn, leech?" The other, a broad, muscular guy with gelled dirty blonde hair, taunts me, raking his eyes up and down my body with no subtlety whatsoever.

I remain silent, my eyes wide as I try to figure out how to get out of this mess, only coming up with one idea. Taking a breath, I rush forwards, intending to leap over them, seeing as I have some sort of supernatural power now, only to be hit with a small, plastic device, which promptly explodes into a mist of stinging liquid, a shriek of agony erupting from my throat as i fall to the floor, clutching at the bloodied, burnt skin of my face and hands, tears threatening to spill as the pain continues to harass me, my body shaking violently. Smirking, the older hunters stroll over to me, muttering something about "holy water grenades", one of them toeing at my body, trying to roll me onto my back, only to cry out in surprise when I grab hold of it in a fit of rage, pulling the limb to my face where I bite into the tough flesh. Instantly, my face contorts into the horrifying features that have plagued me for days, bloodlust clouding my vision as I growl into the leg, only to yelp when the guy lands a solid kick straight to my face, breaking my nose as I reel back, screaming in pain.

"You two, pass me those stakes we made earlier." The black haired hunter commands the Frog brothers, holding out a hand for the two kids to fill with carved wooden spikes. Grinning cruelly at me, he kneels beside me and pushes me onto my back, straddling my chest with his knees pinning my arms down, the other hunter coming over to hold down my legs as I struggle and writhe beneath them.

"I think someone needs to be taught a lesson in etiquette." Black Hair hisses at me, taking my right hand and stretching it away from my body, splaying my fingers as much as he can, "Most people shake hands when they first meet, but you didn't, so that is something that needs to be corrected."

As he speaks, I can only watch in terror as he angles a stake over the centre of my palm, smirking before he drives it down, straight down into the soft skin that protects the bones of my hand, blood spilling from the wound even as screams of agony spill from my lips. Disabled, my hand lies there simply, the wooden weapon stuck through it, not quite holding it in place, but left there to continue making me feel pain, the hunter swiftly doing the same to my other hand. Gasps and whimpers of pain leave me, my fingers curling and clawing at the crude spikes, something about them making my blood feel as if it is made of acid.

"And now for the finale." The hunter informs me, holding yet another stake over my chest, panic giving me some energy as I scream for help, hoping someone will hear me, only to be stopped by a hand pressing tightly over my mouth. Slowly, ever so slowly, the weapon is forced into my skin, shrieks of agony being muffled by the guy's hand, tears coating my cheeks as I realise how hopeless the situation is.

A sudden gasp for air snaps the hunter's attention away from me, his head turning to look over his shoulder, a curse leaving him as he notices something: his partner is no longer there. To my left, the Frog brothers look equally as confused, though they also look absolutely terrified, a horrified scream tearing itself from them as a body suddenly drops from the sky, the alluring scent of blood making my fangs push out of my gums, my own blood spilling down my chin as their razor-sharp points slice into my lower lip.

Startled, the first hunter pushes himself up, glancing around himself quickly, eyes wide and expression uneasy, hand reaching for the gun at his belt, only to be violently pulled into the sky by some cloaked creature, a strangled scream following this a second later, the body joining the first after a minute or two. Shrieking in pure fear, the two Frogs take off, dropping their stakes and waterpistols on the floor with a clatter, leaving me incapacitated on the floor, two stakes shoved into my hands. From my position, I try to push myself upright again, only to squeal in agony as a wave of pain washes over me, my sharp eyesight only just picking out the sight of someone walking up the road towards me as my ears pick up a frustrated "goddamn hunters". As soon as I lay my eyes on them, something sparks to life inside me, an odd feeling I can't understand, though I do keep my eyes on the rapidly approaching figure, in hopes of recognising them and figuring out why this sensation has made itself known.

Stepping into view, my rescuer instantly stops in his tracks, icy blue eyes widening as he sees me. He is ridiculously good looking, platinum blonde hair styled into a mullet, long black coat hiding his muscular body from view, skin pale yet stained with blood in the dim light. For a few seconds, we just stare, until the fear kicks in again and I start trying to edge away from him, wincing in pain, my eyes widening in worry as he starts to near me, only to stop when I hear his voice.

"Hey, I'm not going to hurt you! I just want to help." His voice is like honey, rich and smooth, and very pleasant to listen to, a longing sensation welling up in me, as if my body is willing me to go to him.

He steps further forwards, kneeling beside me with a concerned look in his eyes, hands instantly going to the stake in my left palm.

"This is gonna hurt, but it will heal quickly enough." He warns me, before yanking the weapon out of my skin, grimacing at the sight of the blood that rushes out afterwards, his eyes flashing yellow momentarily as I scream in agony, pulling my hand into my chest. However, an odd feeling starts to encompass the burning circles of pain, the skin looking as if it is knitting itself together again, even though I've done nothing to aid it.

"Ok, one more. You're doing really well, kitten. Stay with me." The guy reassures me, briefly smoothing a hand over my cheek before he tears the other stake from my right hand, soothing me as I sob out loud. At his touch, I manage to register what feels like an electric spark, my body instinctively leaning into his in response.

"Wh-who are you?" I force out, breathing heavily once more.

"I'm David. What's your name?" The guy replies, scooping me up into my arms with ease, cradling me against his chest. Instinctually, I bury my head into the soft fabric of his shirt, breathing in the reassuring scents of cigarette smoke, motor oil, dust and a strange metallic smell, which I instantly recognise - blood.

"I'm (Y/n)." I inform him, before continuing a little quieter, "Thank you for saving me."

"Don't mention it." He smiles down at me, the sight of it making butterflies in stomach cause havoc, "You got anywhere to stay?'

"Err, no. Why?" I frown a bit, still enjoying the proximity.

"You wanna come stay with me? I have plenty of room at home, and I'm sure you'd fit in." He confirms, rubbing soothing circles into my back.

"Fit in?"

"Yeah, I live with three other people, but they're all good guys, so you don't have to worry about them. We can help you with the transition if you want?"

"The transition?"

"You're a newly tuned vampire, aren't you? You'll need help transitioning." The platinum blonde points out, speaking as if I know what he's talking about.

"Ok, sure. If it's not too difficult for you."

"It isn't. I'm glad you accepted." He smiles at me, walking off with me still clutched in his arms, easy to spend the rest of eternity with me.

Part Two

#the lost boys #joel schumacher #vampire #david(thelostboys)#kiefer sutherland #paul(the lost boys)#dwayne(the lost boys)#marko(the lost boys)#santa carla #star(the lost boys)#request #answer #ask

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galvanizedfriend · 4 years

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KC Bingo 2020: Drabble

Because there were so many winners on the @klaroline-events 2020 Bingo, I'm helping out @itsnotacrimetoloveyou with some of the drabble awards. Hope you guys don’t mind this. You were in for an exclusive Luiza piece and instead you get me! lol I promise I’m doing my best.

This is for @klavscaroline and her GORGEOUS manip with the theme "Rome".

Years of fighting as a gladiator had Niklaus prepared when he is caught with the Emperor’s wife, Caroline, in the Sanitarium after dark.

So I have to clarify that my knowledge of Ancient Rome is extremely limited, and even though I DID consult with Prof. Google for some of the stuff in the drabble (like to find out what a sanitarium was and how Emperors and Empresses were addressed at the time), I'm sure it's all shades of wrong. Hopefully I'm not offending anyone, but just take this as a grain of salt, ok? Ok, then.

Also, I added a TWIST to the plot. lol Sorry? I think?

Your manip was way too gorgeous, @klavscaroline, and I could never match it, but I hope you like this. :) Also, congrats on your full card and THANK YOU for always making such amazing KC content!

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Caroline slows down her purposeful steps and smooths out the concern creasing her expression into practiced aloofness before she enters the sanitarium.

To her luck, there's only one patient there, accompanied by the physician who's seeing to his wounds. The other fighter was killed in combat at the arena, his body simply carried out to be ditched in a shallow grave somewhere.

The man has been undressed of his tunic, left in only a loincloth hiding his modesty. A light sheen covers his sun-tanned skin from the exertion, dirty blonde curls matted to his forehead. Normally, these would be sights that would make Caroline's insides twist rather inappropriately. Now, however, all she can focus on is the blood. All over the man's discarded tunic, all over his torso, gushing from a wound on his shoulder.

She swallows back the bile that rises to her mouth, suddenly raked with nausea. When his piercing blue eyes meet hers, her heart gives a violent lurch. Despite her nerves, she lets out a relieved breath. Thank the gods.

"My queen," the physician says, blinking with surprise. It's not common for the Empress to go down to the sanitarium, especially after a fight, especially on her own, and especially when there's a man being treated there. It’s not a very womanly environment, the smell of blood and sweat staining the air.

"The Emperor wants to know what's his best warrior's condition," she announces solemnly with as bland an expression as she can muster.

"Just a superficial wound, my queen," the physician offers. "No damage to the muscle tissue. Provided it doesn't get infected, he should heal well."

"Then what are you doing there, standing? His wounds need cleaning and dressing. Go see to it."

"Y-yes, of course," the man stammers, startling out of inertia. "I will be back in a moment."

The man scurries out of sight, leaving the two of them alone.

Klaus arches his eyebrows at her, an amused smile playing on his lips.

Caroline's pretense calm explodes into nerves. "How can you be so careless?" she snaps.

"Is that the Emperor asking?"

She simply ignores his attempt at a humorous jab and proceeds with the scolding. "You fight like a lunatic, Klaus. One of these days -"

"I will die. And so will every other man on this land," he says with a lightness that does not belong to a man with an open wound on his shoulder. "I can assure you, however, that my death shall not happen at the arena."

She huffs out in indignation. "Your hubris really knows no bounds."

"You say that based on a little scratch?"

"A little scratch!" she parrots, taken with heat as she walks over to him. The physician left a basin with clean water and a towel beside it. Caroline wets the towel and proceeds to clean the wound, being as gentle as possible, even though he hardly deserves it. Not that it makes a difference; Klaus keeps his too-sharp eyes trained on her, his features as bland and agreeable as ever. Doesn't even wince when she rubs the towel against the cut. It looks terrible, but it is definitely not as bad as she'd envisioned as she watched the combat from the stands. "Do you feel no pain?" she asks, a light thrum of fear coloring her voice.

"Of course I feel pain."

"Doesn't that hurt?" She touches the towel across the wound again, most of the blood now gone from his shoulder.

"Yes. But pain is good. Pain reminds us to be afraid," he says, lips curling upwards a tad more, eyes glowing with fire and danger. Oh, Niklaus..., she thinks. Such a force of nature. Caroline had no mercy on her poor heart when she got herself involved with him.

"Pain makes you reckless," she admonishes.

"No. What makes me reckless is the fear of pain. I try to avoid it."

She scoffs. "You could have me fooled." She puts the towel down, her fingers grazing over a pair of scars not far from the new one he'll likely get. Sometimes, at night, while he sleeps, she counts the scars on his back, his arms, his legs... There are so many. She swears he gets a new one every day, growing them as though one who grows hair. Some small and almost imperceptible to less attentive eyes, eyes not used to roam over the plains and valleys of his body with such regard; some so large they bring a chill to her heart, thinking of how close she's come to losing him. "Soon enough there won't be a single unblemished patch of skin on your body."

He holds her hand, presses her palm down against his chest, above his heart. Its strong, steady beats give her a measure of comfort. "Does that concern you?"

Caroline’s lips twist. "What do you think?"

With a swift and agile move, Klaus wraps his arms around her and pulls her up on to the gurney, rolling over so that her body is pressed down underneath his. A man with a gash on his shoulder and dozen other bruises should be howling in pain right now, but Niklaus merely smiles, a large and predatory grin that looks absolutely sinful on his rosy lips.

Still, Caroline's heart drums away in her chest, her eyes flitting nervously to the entrance. "What are you doing?" she grits out. "He'll be back -"

"In a bit," Klaus remarks with all the calm in the world. "He went all the way to the dispensary for his dressing items. The Emperor's best warrior can only be treated with the best. If I get an infection, it will be his head hanging outside the walls."

"Someone could walk in -"

"Yes?" he edges his face closer, his mouth hovering an inch away, chest to chest, hip to hip. "And what would you do?" he whispers, warm breath ghosting her lips.

"I would..." Caroline breathes out, the hand that should be shoving him away sliding up to his hair. "Scream."

She pulls his head down, cutting the final space between them, mashing Klaus' mouth against hers in a plundering kiss. All the worry, all the prayers she made for the gods to protect him, the breath she held as she marched down to the sanitarium after watching him being helped out of the arena - it all bleeds out of her in that kiss. She relishes the taste of him, that urgent and hungry tongue that wrestles her into submission.

Another day she could've lost Klaus; another day he lives to make her heart swell with joy and lust.

"Now would be the moment to scream."

Klaus jumps from the gurney like thunder, grabbing his sword in the process and pointing it straight to the throat of the intruder. Caroline's heart stutters to a stop.

The Emperor stands there, totally unfazed by the sharp sword aimed at his neck, his classic stoic expression unmoved. He merely cocks Klaus a curious eyebrow. "Not contented enough with sleeping with your Emperor's wife, Niklaus?" he asks flatly. "Are you going to commit regicide and fratricide all at once now to add to your list of misdemeanors?"

Klaus puts down his sword. The light wince as he does so does not escape Caroline's eyes. He's in more pain than he's willing to admit, the arrogant bastard.

"You know better than to sneak up on me like that, Elijah," Klaus grumbles.

"And you know better than to straddle my wife in a sanitarium, Niklaus." He turns his pointed gaze to Caroline, then. "I expect this kind of barbaric behavior from him, but you, Caroline? I'm disappointed."

She averts his gaze, her cheeks burning with embarrassment as she stands to her feet, fixing her tunic and her hair. "He grabbed me," she says, the excuse weak to her own ears. "I was merely here to check that he hadn't lost a limb or bled to death with his carelessness."

Elijah lets out a weary sigh. "You two are free to conduct your activities however you please, so long as it's away from prying eyes. That was the deal. I have far too many responsibilities to suddenly find myself dragged into a scandal between my wife and my brother." He fixes his dark eyes on his younger brother then, a smile finally breaking onto his handsome face. "I would so hate to have to punish you for your indiscretions, Niklaus."

"You don't seem fazed by the prospect, brother."

"Then don't test me. How's your wound?"

"A scratch."

"It's not just a scratch," Caroline cuts in sharply. "The physician said it's superficial, but it's at risk of infection."

"How much longer do you intend to keep putting your life at risk at the arena like you’re a common gladiator, Niklaus?" Elijah asks.

"How much longer until you find me a real war to fight?"

"I know you were far too restless to sit through our childhood lessons, but let me remind you that the general idea is to keep the Empire at peace."

Klaus snorts. "You and your philosopher's heart."

Caroline feels her blood boil at his derision. "Most men choose to fight so that they can preserve their lives and that of their families," she starts, spitting fire at him. "You, on the other hand, run in the opposite direction. Like a madman without a purpose, you chase mortal danger like that is the sole purpose of your existence. And then you laugh at your brother's concern - at my concern. Like we're idiots for even caring. If you can't grow yourself a philosopher's heart, perhaps you should at the very least grow yourself a conscience."

Klaus stares at her with wide eyes and parted lips, somewhat taken aback, while Elijah's mouth ticks up into a smile, a flicker of humor and warmth in his brown eyes.

"I am ever glad to have wedded such a wise woman. If my appeals fall on deaf ears, perhaps hers might reach you," he says. "I have business to see to. Please, refrain from fornicating out here. And Niklaus..." he waits until his brother has turned back to him. "Get this wound cleaned up and dressed, soon."

With all the grace and poise befitting of the Emperor, Elijah turns around and leaves.

Klaus gives her a near diffident look under his fair lashes, having the decency to appear guilty.

Caroline folds her arms across her chest. "I can't keep watching you challenge men to try and kill you every fortnight."

"I'm a warrior, Caroline. My brother's a diplomat, a ruler. I'm a fighter. He's the brain, I'm the muscle. You knew that when you married him... When you married us."

Caroline puffs out in frustrated derision. "I married him because I had to. Because it was the bargain he stroke with my father. But perhaps I made a mistake, then, when I fell in love with the wrong brother."

"Don't say that," he retorts, genuinely stricken. "You know I'm a jealous man."

"Oh? Are you challenging Elijah next, then?"

"Of course not. If I killed my brother, the Empire would descend into chaos and I would be forced to take his place and murder my way through countless political intrigues, which would leave me with little to no time for the one thing I'm truly passionate about."

"Arenas," she offers with disdain.

"You." Klaus' eyes soften then, no longer wild with raw excitement; something tender and gentle shining through the stormy blue. A look, she knows, only bestowed to her. It tugs directly at her heart, and she feels a glow of affection rising through the anger and the concern. "I'm addicted to you, Caroline. The arenas are a mere distraction. You are the sun of my life."

She bites back on a smile. The same wicked tongue that lashes out at enemies with the more depraved of curses can also worship and conjure the sweetest of promises. "If what you say is true... Then, as your queen, I command you to stay away from the arenas until your wound is fully healed and no longer at risk of reopening. You shall stay with us, at the royal chambers, where you can be cared for by the Emperor's physician. The Emperor demands so."

Klaus smirks lazily. "Well, we wouldn't want to vex the Emperor."

"No, we absolutely wouldn't." She checks that her clothes are all perfectly in place, squaring her shoulders and straightening her posture as she prepares to leave. "Now lie down and wait for the man to return. Then ask your servants to prepare your relocation. It might be awhile before you go back to your own home, so bring whatever you might need. I shall have a warm bath ready for when you arrive."

Klaus walks over to her, taking her hand and lifting it up to his lips. "That's very kind of you, my queen," he says, the thrum of his voice traveling through her like a lightning bolt.

"Yes, I am infinitely generous." She edges closer, narrowing her eyes with malicious intent. "And expect to be rewarded for it."

She waltzes out to the sound of Klaus' rich laughter. Oh, how she loves that sound...

#klaroline #klaroline drabble #kcbingo2020 #klaroline fic #klaroline fanfiction #klarolinefic #kc fanfiction #kc fic #kcfic #klaus x caroline #yokan writes #klavscaroline

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readerwinterbarnes · 5 years

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Gentle Touch: Pt. 9

Secrets Uncovered

Bucky x OFC (Jules Carlson), Steve/Tony, Avengers

Summary: Steve begins to understand what he did wrong and starts to take the steps to fix it. Not to mention his relationship comes to light. (I suck at summaries)

Word Count: 3,822

Warnings: Rape/NON, no POV, hurt Steve, angst, mild Stony, but they get caught ;)

A/N: Friendly reminder that the Rape/Non-Con tag is permanent, considering that it’s mentioned a lot in this series. Anyway, onwards!! Thank you LydiaJean1331 on AO3 for this idea! Next part will have some funniness added in! I’ll try to post again sometime this week!

Also on AO3! WinterReadingerDixon67

“I don’t get it! I should be allowed to see Bucky!” Tony watched on quietly as Steve paced around the common room angrily. “I didn’t do anything wrong! I was just trying to help him, why can’t Jules see that?”

“Spangles why don’t you sit down before you burn a hole through my floor.” Knowing that it was safer to go the more teasing route.

Steve sat down with a huff, “Just who does she think she is? I’m trying to help my best friend and now she makes me sound like I’m the bad guy! If anything, she’s the one who’s the bad guy.”

Tony sighed, “Well for one, she’s my employee and is Bucky’s therapist who’s doing what’s best for him. And as for you being the bad guy? That’s only because he thinks you are. So don’t you think he deserves the space he needs? He’s had his whole life stripped away from him, his whole personality. Fuck, everything that made him Bucky Barnes is gone and now he has to find out who he is now. Like a baby learning how to walk or a bird spreading their wings to fly for the first time.”

Steve shook his head, “I know that, but it’s like as if he no longer wants to be my friend and that I’m the one who locked him in a cell. It feels like...like Jules is the Judge and Jury and forced me to be the executioner and lock up my best friend.”

Tony shifted on the couch to face Steve grabbing his hands, “What you did to Bucky was a poor choice in wanting to help him, but…” Tony covered Steve’s mouth, shutting all complaints with a raised eyebrow. “What if I was in his place? Would you throw me in the pool, the ocean, hold my head underwater without warning? Take the arc reactor out of my chest?”

Steve’s eyes bulged, air being punched out of his body from the horrifying statement. It took him some time, but he eventually figured out just how much Tony hates having his whole body underwater. Hence why the only way Tony would ever take a bath is if he was on Steve’s lap and no water above his waist. Tony told him of Afghanistan and the events that took place there, the nightmares he would have. Feeling his lungs burning from being waterboarded and how he struggled to breathe, even in his nightmare state. How he despised the dark, always needing a light on even during movie nights because it reminded him of the black hole. Eyes prickling with tears, Steve gripped Tony’s wrist gently, nuzzling his face into the palm laying a kiss there.

“You know I’d never do that to you baby, never, I’d never hurt you,” tears prickled his eyes, not realizing they slipped free until a calloused thumb brushed them away. He was met with gentle brown eyes.

“I know you’d never hurt me, Steve, well not unless I begged you too. There are some things we still haven’t tried yet.” Tony smirked, wiggling his eyebrows at his boyfriends reddening face.

“Tony…”

“I know they don’t know yet, anyway back to the point,” he leaned back slightly, “everything that I went through, the nightmares, the scars that remind me of it, the endless sleepless nights. How is it any different with Bucky? He went through a lot of rough shit that any of us can never comprehend, let alone understand. And if there are things he doesn’t want us to know, then we will give him time and space until he’s ready to share them.” Tony shrugged, “He might not even want us to even know about them, which is fine because that’s his choice and his alone.”

Steve froze when he realized what he just did, how he acted and how he must’ve looked through Bucky’s eyes. How he was the monster Bucky feared in every possible way. He felt sick to his stomach from his actions. Emotions building up beyond the point of holding them in, but Tony was there to comfort him as he broke down.

“It’s all my fault, isn’t it? That I’m now the monster he sees.” He sobbed into Tony’s shoulder, “And now I can’t do anything to actually help him.”

“Hey, everything will be alright. Wanna know why?” Tony lifted the blondes face to him, “Because you try to fix your mistakes, granted you tend to act first ask questions later, but you’re getting there. And you agreeing to give him the space he needs? Tells him that you respect the choices he made and are willing to wait for him to come to you whenever he’s ready, not when you’re ready.”

Steve looked at Tony with such adoration, he felt as if his heart was going to explode. “How’d you come to be so wise?”

Tony shrugged, “I’m a genius, comes naturally.” Of course, Steve knew Tony learned throughout the years, hell he even learned from Tony when they started dating.

“Come here,” Steve pulled Tony onto his lap, capturing his lips eagerly. Running his hands up Tony’s thighs, Steve loved the way the man shivered as his hands slipped past the bands of his jeans. “Just like that baby, god you look so good like this. Eager for it.”

“Fuck S-Steve,” Tony whimpered when Steve’s finger slip down and press against his still lose hole from their activities from this morning. “Still lose, I’m ready, please…”

“Mmm love it when you beg so nicely,” Tony squealed as Steve flipped them around on the couch, but it quickly turned into a moan when Steve rolled his hips against his.

“Steve, oh fuck, babe someone could-oh god faster!” He cried out, holding his boyfriend to his neck as Steve sunk his teeth into his skin. Leaving angry red marks from his blunt nails that scratched down the broad back.

A cough brought them out of their bubble, “Um, how about not faster.”

“But it’s a free show!” THUD “OW! Natasha!”

“This explains everything.”

Steve and Tony shot off the couch as if it burned them, frantically fixing their appearance, but it didn’t help erase how red their faces were. The others watched with amusement and shock. “What do you mean it explains everything?” Clint said rubbing the back of his head where Nat hit him.

“The lingering glances when they think no one’s looking, the way Tony wanted to comfort Steve after missions when he was hurt,” Nat told Clint.

That’s when Jules snapped her fingers, “So that’s why you looked like a mess after you came out of the elevator and the red scratch marks. Or when Tony blushed when someone told him not to get his panties in a twist, because of private reasons?” If they weren’t blushing before, they definitely were now. Especially Tony, who looked like a deer in headlights or a child caught with their hand in the cookie jar.

“Um, well, you see the thing is…” Steve tried to explain and Tony wasn’t sure if he should say anything.

“Right, well why don’t we all sit down and I’ll ask the questions? Is that alright with you Tony?” Jules glanced towards him, who nodded shyly.

“Ok, so obviously you and Steve are together and have things you like to do for your own personal private pleasures. You both don’t want your relationship known because you want the sense of normalcy and privacy. Although you might want to work on that bit a bit more I think, I’d rather not have to walk into something that will scar me for life.” The two men nodded, still not saying a word to the others.

“Are you two happy? Like happy, happy?”

“Yes,” Tony was the first to speak, “he makes me feel happy.” Jules could tell that both men had to resolve a lot of issues and insecurities during the first steps of their relationship. Information that they were definitely not comfortable talking with anyone else. “Good and Steve? What about you?”

Steve honestly didn’t want to look her in the eyes, due to their previous confrontation earlier, “Yes he does, he helps me understand things that I don’t get. But he makes me very happy.”

“Great! Then that’s all I need to know! But if you both ever want to talk, you know where to find me. But please for all our sakes and my sanity if you want to have fun hot steamy kinky sexy times together, think of where you’re going to do it first. And safety first, always safety first, I don’t want to have to write up a report on how either one of you got stuck in a pair of handcuffs while trying to get off or something.”

Tony instantly brought a hand up to prevent his laugh coming through, but it didn’t work very well because he ended up a snorting mess. Steve, however, was glaring at his genius boyfriend, “Not a word Tony, please.”

“Oh. My. God.”

“This just got even better.”

“Congratulations boys, don’t stay up too late.” Nat winked at them before she left the room. Clint running after her, “How does this make it better? Nat tell me!”

The others simply smiled, well Bruce looked awkward in the situation and Thor was being well...Thor. “Congratulations are in order, my friends! May your lovemaking continue to bring happiness to your lives!”

“Thor!” Steve gawked at the already retreating god, while Tony looked as if he wanted the floor to swallow him whole.

“Alright you two, now don’t worry, I’m pretty sure the others will keep this information quiet. But for now,” Jules coughed, smiling softly at them, “just keep all the stuff where we can’t see it. Unless you’re into that kind of thing, which is totally acceptable of course. But I’ll just leave now and let you guys continue your...passionate activities.”

On her way to her office floor, she couldn’t help but smile as she heard quiet enthusiastic voices and very eager feet running towards Tony’s private elevator to his penthouse.

------

Bucky’s Room

Bucky thought he was doing better, well he was - is doing better. But this morning he felt wired, energetic, too anxious to focus on anything. So he spent the whole morning doing what he does best besides killing people; exercising. He ran laps, lifted weights, pushups, even spent the past two hours swimming in Tony’s private pool and tried to do yoga. But even that couldn’t seem to shake the feeling off. He eventually figured out the problem himself when he went back to his room.

His bed.

Granted it was a very comfortable bed, but a bed nonetheless. One he was avoiding for good reasons, but knowing it wouldn’t hurt him. It wasn’t until he was sitting on his bed until he realized he knew what he was doing. He was sitting in the middle of his bed, nothing but his boxers, exposing himself to the possibility of danger.

Before he could comprehend what he was doing, let alone stop himself, he laid himself on the bed and spread himself out like a starfish. Breath ragged, Bucky forced himself to stay where he was and do the breathing exercises Jules taught him. “F-Friday?”

“Yes, Mr. Barnes?”

“C-Can you talk to me? About the weather, colors, smells, any-anything?”

“Of course, the weather outside is a steady fifty degrees. The sun is out and the leaves on the trees are all in fall colors, which contrasts against the blue sky. The tower kitchen staff are currently baking fresh wheat bread, pumpkin muffins, and a variety of scones. Thor is meeting with Jane out of the tower, Bruce is in his lab, Clint is sparring with Natasha, Tony is on his way to his workshop, and Steve is currently having a meeting with Jules.

Your heart rate is well within the healthy range, your levels are normal. You ran ten miles today and swam five. You managed to sleep for a full nine hours last night without any issues that did not require extra assistance. The sun is currently shining through your windows, leaving the room in a warm, soft glow. You are the only one in the room and completely safe.”

Silence flooded the room, a wave of safety washed over him. He stayed like this for a few more minutes, before he forced himself out of bed, having enough of it already. Bucky not wanting to feel exposed anymore, quickly slipped on a pair of sweats, thick socks, and a hoodie, before he grabbed his journal and made his way to his spot on the couch. Once he was bundled up underneath his comforter, he opened the journal to the next page and began to write.

‘I laid on my bed, like full on starfish, exposed to everything...danger, my nightmares, to...them. If it wasn’t for Tony’s AI Friday, I don’t think I would’ve made it that far. I think she said I was there for a good thirty minutes before I had to get off and away from the bed. Too many bad memories associated with it.

But I did it myself, I got on the bed by myself and...and stayed there. Does this mean I’m getting better? Does this mean I’ll - I’ll become normal again?’

------

Jules Office

Jules was sitting in her office going through some paperwork for Tony and how to proceed with Bucky’s arm replacement when a knock sounded on her door. She didn’t have any appointments for today, so she opened the door only to find Steve standing on the other side.

“Steve...I wasn’t expecting you, please come in.”

“Thank you,” she watched Steve walk into her office taking in the picture frames, the garden outside, the calm affects the room offered.

“Is there something I can help you with?”

“Um, I...I would like to apologize for my previous actions. My behavior and how I obviously made the whole situation worse. Tony always said that I was more of like take action first ask questions later type of guy.” He laughed softly, gazing at his hands hoping that they hold the answers he wants.

“Growing up, I was always bullied. Pushed into mud puddles, dragged to back alley’s, always getting myself into trouble. I hated bullies and didn’t care what happened to me and would fight them about it, but I was a stick back them. Bucky he...he fought for me, threw a few punches, called me a ‘stupid punk for getting myself into these situations’. He was right though, they both were.”

“Both?” Intrigued, Jules sat across from him patiently waiting for him to continue.

Steve rubbed the back of his neck nervously, “Yeah, uh Ultron, he said that I was always looking for a fight. A war of some kind. He wasn’t wrong, I mean there were always times where the only time I felt needed or wanted as if there was a war to end. That need to bring bullies down stayed with me and...and it didn’t end well in many ways. Almost cost me, Tony, to be honest.”

“Right, so before the serum, you were a scrawny tiny guy who hated bullies and post-serum you feel like that’s your right. That you need to get rid of them because when it comes down to it, a bullies a bully right?”

“Exactly!”

“So Natasha’s a bully?” Steve looked shocked from what she said.

“What? No, no way, she’s a nice person!”

Jules shrugged, “But she still killed people.”

“That was her job, she had no choice.”

“Yet she still killed people. Is Bucky or Tony a bully?”

Steve now looked hurt and enraged, “What are you talking about? What are you trying to say? They are the best people I have ever known!”

“Doesn’t matter,” she held up her hand stopping Steve from interrupting, “from what your definition of a bully is, is basically what they are. Sure Bucky was a great guy before his devastating accident,” Steve flinched from the memory, “but afterward? He killed people, yes it wasn’t his fault, but from everyone else's point of view? He was a pretty big bully and wasn’t afraid to show it.

Now, Tony, man alive was he the definition of a bully. I mean he made weapons for goodness sake, weapons that killed people. He drove his friends away because he was selfish. I mean come on, he’s a spoiled rich kid who gets everything he wants and definitely not afraid to show it. Always flashing something at someone.”

Steve stood up abruptly, red-faced, full of fury, “You know nothing about them! You don’t know them! In fact, the only one here who’s a bully is you! I actually thought I could come here and talk to you about my problems, but now I realize I can’t!” Before he managed to stomp out of her office, Jules laughed.

“Ugh about time! Finally, we’re getting somewhere!” That stopped Steve in his tracks.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Sit,” she stood up and grabbed them some juice, “I know you hate me and don’t deny it. You think I’m stopping you from becoming friends with Bucky again, which is extremely false by the way, but more on that later. When it comes to the people we love, to family, we love and care for them despite what they’ve done in the past.

The description I just gave about Tony, is what others would describe him as. To them, they see him as a bully. A stuck up man, who parties all the time, flaunts his money like its no tomorrow and didn’t give a rats ass of his company. But,”

Jules sat down and looked him square in the face, “but they never knew him of who he truly was. He was a man who desperately wanted to show the world his creations, what he wanted his company to be, but that fear of his father; the true bully, fought him every step of the way. We know of the portal, the lithium poison, him flying out the window, Afghanistan, they never knew the real Tony. But he needed a shield to hide behind so he wouldn’t get hurt.

I could go on and on about him and the others, but I want to focus on Bucky for the moment if that’s okay with you. Now we all know that Bucky’s not a bully, but to a little girl whose parents were murdered? Yeah, she’d think differently, but again, she doesn’t know the full story. Just like you Steve Rogers, don’t know the full story.”

Steve looked ashamed, like her words physically burned him, “You’re talking about the other day aren’t you?”

“Precisely, you may not like bullies Steve, but you are the biggest one I have ever met and let me explain why. You’re a bully and a coward. You think that everything needs to go your way and who shouldn’t have to face their own consequences. Which can get annoying very quickly if I might add. All you wanted was to bring Bucky back home and make sure that his bullies, a.k.a Hydra got what they deserved.

But the way you acted about it, made you feel like the bully everyone was avoiding. Which is exactly what Bucky is doing to you now and that was exactly who you were to him that day too. You were the bully of his past, of his nightmares, the monster under his bed who made him scared to even wake up in the morning. You don’t mean to hurt him in any way, but just like Tony said, actions before words kinda guy.”

Steve sat there on the couch and thought about what Jules words, “I’m really a bully aren’t I? I became the thing I never wanted to be.”

“In a way, yes you have, but you have a chance here to change that.”

“How?”

“By being the person he doesn’t want you to be. He knows that he will never be the Bucky you knew before the war, so encourage him to be the Bucky he wants to be now. Show him that you’re still his friend, that all you want is for your friend to be happy and healthy. That he’s still Bucky, he might not be your Bucky, but that he’s Bucky. Continue to give him the space he needs if he wants to talk and you just listen, give him that. If he just wants to sit with you in complete silence, give him that too. Show him that you are not the bully he fears, but the friend he needs.

But stop trying to fix everything, because you can’t fix everything. Some things just can’t be fixed, sometimes they just need help with moving on. Just...just think of what I’ve said okay? I honestly wish I was more harsh with you and honest to god slapped you and busted your balls for what you did to him. But if you ever hurt him again, I will do much worse. Understand?”

Steve nodded, knowing that she absolutely will follow through with it. “I understand, and thank you for the talk and the juice.”

Jules watched the man stand and make his way out the door, like a man who was trying to prevent his world from unraveling. She knew it was difficult for him, she did, but he needed to understand the result of his actions. Results that could cost him a very close friend, one he doesn’t want to lose. Her phone began to ring as she brought their cups to the sink, answering it on the way.

“Dr. Carlson, how may I help you?”

“Hey, Jules? It’s me, Hank.”

“Hank? Is everything okay?”

“Uh, yes and no...actually no, um Kathy went into labor and our neighbor called me while I was at work. So she brought Kathy to the hospital and I can’t get there cause I’m stuck in traffic. I’m supposed to be there with her dammit!”

“Hank, Hank listen to me alright? I’ll head right over to the hospital and be with her, she won’t be alone in this okay? Just focus on getting through traffic safely so you can be with your wife and child alright?”

“Thanks, Jules, you are a lifesaver, I’ll call you as soon as I’m at the hospital.”

“Sounds good, see you soon.”

Jules sat down on her couch with a huff, mind racing in various directions. She was going to be a godmother soon and she couldn’t wait! But it quickly dawned on her that she would have to be out of town for a few days. Meaning Bucky wouldn’t be able to meet with her for those said days, meaning....that this was going to be a very long week.

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vechkinfan · 6 years

Text

End of Me ~ Part 3 (Bucky Barnes)

A/N: Hope you guys like this part, I enjoyed writing the fluff. Please let me know what you think!! I’m a sucker for comments hahah (There is Russian in this part and i’m sorry if its totally wrong, I tried my best.... You will definitely find out what it all means in the next part though, I PROMISE) If you wanted to be TAGGED, Please leave a comment :D

Words: 5667 (Sorry, Not sorry)

Warning: Fluff, Fluff and Bucky trying to be Fluffy.

Summary: Calin’s demon finally makes an appearance, and one super solider gets in the way to help bring her back to reality.

Part 1 // Part 2

It had been a long night, the longest she had experienced in quite awhile actually. It reminded her of those nights in the facility, where the screaming echoed off the concrete walls amplifying the noises. Where the crying from the other kids seeped into her brain, despite how hard she held her hands over her ears. Willing… pleading for the world to go silent, even if it was just for a moment, just so she could close her eyes.

She had been laying on Steve's floor staring up at the ceiling, listening to him snore softly. Calin envied him, how easily he found sleep. Even in the near silence of his room, she couldn't even dream of catching a wink. Every time she shut her eyes visions would plague her, images of Bucky, Steve, of Wanda and Bruce. Her imagination did not discriminate on who it picked to torture her with. Cause the flashes of images always ended the same, with the Avengers dead and their blood on her hands.

Sitting up from the floor, Calin ran a tired hand through her hair, before pulling it up in a messy bun. She knew her demon was the cause of the vivid imagery. It had seemed to find some foothold in her subconscious and it didn't want to let go. For over six years Calin had fought with her inner self, pushed her down, kept her buried under good memories she had started to form. But six years was to long for her demon she supposed, it wanted out, it wanted blood. Afterall it was use to coming out several times a week, back at the height of her treatments. There might have been restraints involved, but it still got to breathe some fresh air.

The plan was to wear Calin down until she couldn't fight it anymore. Once all her resolve was gone, it would have total control. And total control meant being able to do whatever the hell it wanted.

Letting out a shaky breath, Calin rose to her feet. Quietly creeping over to Steve's desk, she scribbled out a note stating she was alright and that she would meet them in the med bay later. She had to mentally prepare for the onslaught of tests Bruce had been hankering to perform. The man had been curious about her since she walked into the tower six years ago.

Calin didn't have high hopes for there to actually be a fix to this nightmare better known as her mind. There were only a few things that could be done at this point. They could either restrain her somewhere so her demon could make a very dramatic entrance like it always liked to do, or they could kill her. Preferably not the latter, death was something she begged for when she was with HYDRA, but she didn't want to give up the people who slowly became her family here at the tower. They were her everything, despite her best attempts not to show it.

The thought of letting her demon out made her cringe though. It was a violent experience, at least for herself. The event draining her already depleted energy to the point where it was like she was paralyzed. Awake and aware of what was happening, but unable to do much about it. Not that it mattered back then, she enjoyed the reprieve. To make the situation worse Calin really didn't know how long it would take to fight her way back into control this time. This thing had been lying dormant for years, so the possibility of herself not even coming back was a reality. So in the end death might be the only option, either at her own hands or one of her friends.

Groaning softly, she made her way out of Steve's room, ever so gently shutting the door behind herself. Knowing his super soldier hearing would pick up on the lock latching if she wasn't careful. She merely wanted a morning of peace to herself, knowing it was Saturday, most everyone was sleeping in after a busy week of training and missions. Tony and Bruce wouldn't be up until about eight as usual, so she had a few hours before good old Steve Rogers blew her in for last night's discussions.

Calins feet absentmindedly carried her down the hallway, the morning sun creeping in through the windows basking the walls in a soft orange glow. She had expected to be alone but when she plowed into a large mass, regret flooded her like a levy snapping in two.

She stumbled slightly, a strong metal hand coming out and taking hold of her elbow, steadying her form. Bucky had been up early, pacing the entire length of the hall in front of Steve's room, waiting patiently for someone to get up. He had to stop himself from smashing the door down several times just wanting to rip this God forsaken band aid off. All he wanted was a chance to apologize, to see her smile, and to hold her again.

“Sorry.” Her voice was weak as she took her arm from his grip. Not even looking up at him, knowing if she even glanced into those steely blue orbs, she'd fall right back into the trap known as Bucky Barnes. Like some mindless bug heading straight for the beautiful light of a bug zapper.

“It's ok.” He added cautiously, seeing how distant she was trying to be. Calin wouldn't even look at him, her gaze solely fixed on the hardwood floor. His heart tightened painfully in his chest, seeing what he had done to them, what he did to their relationship.

Without thinking he found his left hand gently raising up, his metal fingers smoothing against the skin of her cheek, an action that he was so use to doing with his girl. The feel of hot flesh against cold vibranium, sending a wave of pleasure shooting through his body. Oh how he missed touching her, feeling her with something that should not even be able to distinguish between materials. Yet here he was, using the pad of his thumb to trace her cheek, feeling every inch of her soft, supple skin beneath him.

He was surprised she didn't pull back from his touch, knowing how upset she was with him. It had taken Bucky so very long to gain every bit of trust she had to offer, that he was certain he'd had lost a good part of it, especially because Calin was someone who didn't forgive or forget easily.

It had taken two years of patient trust building to even able to brush his hand against her own without there being a panic look spreading across her face. From there he slowly allowed his actions to become more intimate and less friend like, trying to show her how he truly felt. It amused Bucky to see how oblivious she was at times. Letting his hand linger on the small of her back as they walked out of a room, how Bucky tried to catch her hand to pull her into a hug, all those things and many more seemed to go right over her head. Even Steve caught onto Bucky's lame attempts at woohing her. Only laughing, remembering how easy Bucky had it back in the day when it came to women. However things needed to be spelled out for Calin, in big bold letters, and in part Bucky knew it was because of her time with HYDRA.

But the girl was like a safe with the lock rusted shut, if it were to open it would need to be pried. She never spoke about her time in Moscow, never hinted at how long she had been held captive, or the things they did to her. It didn't take a brainyak to figure that she was probably tortured, it was HYDRA’s preferred method of captivity afterall. Whenever they spent time cuddled next to one another on the couch he used to pan her face discretely. Looking for scars or burns, anything to let him know what she had been through. He was thankful he didn't see any, and he silently hoped those ass holes spared her of the same pain they put him through.

In truth, that was part of the reason he never told Calin how he truly felt. Over the years she had put on a good front of healing, but every once in awhile flickers of her old terrified self would resurface. Anything regarding physical interactions still scared her especially when Steve or himself weren't nearby, she would flinch away from high-fives from Sam, cringe almost painfully if someone accidentally brushed up against her. He watched her more times than he'd care to count clutching the fabric of one of her sweatshirts, as if she was trying to shield away any unwanted attention. Bucky was already pushing his luck in that department, and figured it was safer to stay in the ‘friendzone’ as Wanda called it.

He knew she was not ready for a relationship when his feelings had developed, she had barely had a hold on friendships at the time. Hell, when he first got out of HYDRA’s grip he certainly wasn't anywhere close to being ready for a relationship. He had to focus solely on himself, and that's what Bucky tried to do for Calin. But Calin was never one to stick to the plans. She seemed to have helped Bucky more so, especially when his nightmares crept back. Which only made his love for the girl stronger.

Bucky sighed contently, continuing to let his fingers run against her skin. She remained quiet and unmoving, her eyes still not finding the courage to look up at him. After a few moments he felt her tilt her head into the palm of his hand, trying to gain more contact. Calin was fighting an internal battle, one wanting her to lash out at Bucky, wanting to yell and scream, telling him he had no right to touch her. However, the bigger, weaker side of herself was enjoying his fingers far too much. Her body missing the cool of the metal that always seemed to send a surge of peace through herself, calming all the frayed nerves that were just waiting to be lit up again.

“Can we talk?” Those three little words were all it took to break Calin out of the trance though. The three fucking words that brought this whole Bucky debacle upon herself weeks ago.

Her lip curled up in disgust, pulling away from his ministrations as if they scalded her skin. “You want to talk? Didn't you already do that?” Calin snapped harshly, stepping back a few feet to put distance between the two of them. “You wanted nothing to do with me Bucky, so why should I even consider listening to a word you have to say now?”

Bucky didn't know what hurt worse, that he had opened his big mouth, ruining their perfectly blissful encounter. Or the way Calins eyes glared with utter hatred at him, an anger swirling dangerously close to the surface of those hazel eyes. He swallowed thickly, uncertain how to respond. This was not how he had planned to patch things up with his girl, so he was at a loss currently. His brain spinning with ideas that certainly would piss her off even further, which was not the goal. ‘Calin’ and ‘pissed’ were never words that should be used in the same sentence, because when she was angry she became a totally different person.

So instead of making matters worse, Bucky's eyes softened, and settled with a matter of fact statement. “I miss you.”

Her mouth opened and shut promptly, clearly not expecting to hear those words. No, in truth Calin expected him to just give her more reasons as to why he couldn't spend time with her.

“What?” She furrowed her brows, still confused.

Bucky gave a weak smile seeing how flustered she became. “I miss you Calin.” He stated again, this time reaching his hand back out to her cheek. Wanting nothing more than to feel that blissful blistering heat against him.

However it never made it close, Calin hitting his arm away from herself. “You don't get to do this Bucky, you don't get to fuck with me like this. I've done everything you've ever asked of me, I tried to be a friend to you and you basically threw me away.” Calin was angry again, her emotions so heightened that it took hardly anything to upset her. “Believe me I know I'm fucked up, and I'm hardly worth the time you've spent with me, but that day… it felt.” Calin swallowed thickly, her hand tightening into a fist at her side, her knuckles turning a ghostly shade of white. “You know what, forget it.”

Taking a steadying breath, Calin looked over the man before her, eyes panning his face searching for anything. She wasn't even quite sure what she was looking for to be honest. A sign? Some kind of blinding light pointing her in the right direction? All she got was Bucky Barnes staring at her, in all his wayward puppy dog glory.

She needed to go.

Turning on her heels she started her way back towards Steve's room. Leaving Bucky right where he stood, leaving him just like he had left her. But she wasn't expecting Bucky to move just a quick, reaching out, wrapping his fingers around her wrist tightly. The act, so innocent yet so familiar. Flooding her mind with memories of how the guards use to grab her flailing body as they dragged her down the dark musty hallways. How their hands, nearly twice the size of her own at the time crushed her wrist with little effort, only the reverberating sound of snapping bone making them release the tension a bit. How when they learned of her powers, they caged her hands together with vibranium binding, only to then drag her kicking and screaming down the hall by a chain like some animal.

The images flashed before her like a movie, and it was one of those moments when time seemed to stop all together. Seconds felt like hours, as she stood there unmoving, feeling a surge of energy hit her consciousness. It knocked her, shook her mind so powerfully Calin knew exactly what was happening. Her other half found it's chance and was not wasting the opportunity. In these times Calin usually accepted it, almost wanting her to make an appearance. Now… oh no, now was not the time. She may hate Bucky at the moment but she would never willing wish for him to be in harm's way and harm's fucking way was exactly what he was in currently.

Biting down on her lip Calin screamed painfully, trying with all her might to keep it at bay. Pushing it back down in the depths of her mind, but it had other plans.

The feeling could be equated to a tidal wave, hitting her at full force causing her to lose her mental footing. Sending Calin falling into an icy pit of darkness that was so thick it made it nearly impossible to move or fight back. Her arms weighed down, so heavy and cumbersome that it felt like she was drowning.

This had never happened quite like this before. Calin had always been a willing participant in the change over. No, this was like that movie Bucky had made her watch, the one with the spartans. One swift kick to the chest and she was falling into a seemingly endless pit of pitch black nothingness, while her other half watched from above. A grin tugging at the corners of her own lips, giving a parting wave. Before Calins body slammed agonizingly into the rough bottom of the pit.

Bucky…

The mere thought of him had her starting to panic. He was in the real world dealing with her other half, her demon right now . Nobody had ever seen it, or dealt with it, she could have already killed half the people in the tower by now. Time didn't work the same being trapped inside the mind, so what felt like minutes could actually be days. So the longer she didn't fight, the more time she let her demon go on its rampage.

She struggled desperately, pulling herself to her feet, hobbling around the circular pit, her arms clawing at anything that would bring her back into control. There was nothing, no holds, no footings, nothing. There had always been something to cling to, something to climb her way back up. Frankly she had never been put here, she usually had one hand on the wheel with her demon, seeing what was going on. Now… not so much.

“возвращайся ко мне.” It was a soft distant voice that called out. Causing her struggling body to stop for a moment, listening.

“Любовь моя, пожалуйста.” Again the voice sounded, pleading to her almost.The noise reverberating off the walls of her mind. Making Calin look around frantically, trying to figure out where it was coming from.

A quiet sob left her lips when her eyes panned upward following the sound, seeing the tiny spec of light. It was so very far away, but she knew that's where the voice was coming from, she knew that's the direction she needed to go in order to take control again.

Wading over to the darkened wall, she pounded her fist violent against the barrier. Her limbs feeling uncomfortably heavy with each swing she took. Hours, it had begun to feel like hours had passed, her hands raw from the continuous barrage but her efforts getting her no closer to Bucky… just more exhausted. And the more tired she was, the longer this processes would last.

“Bucky! You fucking leave him alone.” Calin shouted loudly, rage clear in her voice as it bounced off the walls. But when nothing happened, and the light remained out of reach she choked back a pained whimper. Resting her forehead on the cold surface, her hands splayed out beside her. “Please… just leave him alone, leave them all alone.”

Turning around, she let her back hit the wall before sinking down to the floor. The air getting thicker, the darkness wrapping itself around her limbs pulling her back. Coxing her into a state of acceptance. It wanted her stuck there, just like Calin had done to it. It was gonna keep her trapped for as long as it could, make up for lost time.

“пожалуйста.” That last word, Calin could finally tell it was Bucky’s voice, pleading.

It was Russian, but she knew he was asking her, please. The sound echoing in her mind, stirring up all the things that could be happening to him at this moment. Things that were even worse than her time with HYDRA no doubt. She'd bare every torturous minute back in that facility, just to save him. Save him from herself.

With that thought it felt like she was shot out of a cannon. Body flinging up into the air and out of the hole she was pushed into. Bypassing the climbing option all together.

Calin landed on the ground violently, her breathing ragged as she lay there for a moment. The heat from her breath fanning out against the cold floor, fogging it a little. Vision blurry, her eyes blinked back the haze, trying to see clearly. Her body still shaking and exhausted from the fight it just went through. However Calin was unsure of what was going on or where she was at the moment. She supposed it was another level of her mind, the next barrier between her and her demon. Or she could be back in the real world, but that seemed way to easy.

“Cal….” She lifted her head slightly, seeing that she was actually back in the hallway.

Bucky was laying on the ground beside her, blood dripping from his nose and a large gouge in his cheek. He was staring at her like he had just seen a ghost. His hand gently rubbing his throat, the skin raw looking. In truth he had never witnessed anything quite like that before.

“D-did I hurt you?” Calin asked shakily, her voice quivering in fear. Worried that she hurt him badly. “Did I hurt anyone?”

Pushing herself up onto her hands, she dragged herself towards him cautiously. Keeping a slight buffer zone, uncertain as to how Bucky was going to react. She was surprised he didn't run off screaming, or better yet, find the nearest phone to call Fury. He was always waiting for something like this to happen.

Instead after a few breathless moments of staring, Bucky moved towards her effortlessly. Pulling her weak body into his arms and onto his lap, cradling her against his chest. “No, I'm fine.” He finally spoke, his voice lower than usual. “You're my Calin right, you're my best girl?” Bucky asked, needing to be reassured that she was back. Actually back.

Calin wasn't lying when she said her powers were better left unknown. It only took a split second and the girl he loved had turned into a unrecognizable monster. Eyes dark as a stormy night, swirling with a mixture of hatred and rage. Whatever it was, listened to no reason and was clearly out for blood. It had attacked Bucky so violently that he wasn't sure what to do. It was Calins body, but her mind, the things that made Calin herself were no longer there.

She sure as hell didn't pull punches either, picking him up like he weighed nothing, sending him straight into the nearest wall. His body crushing the drywall like paper, and destroying Tony's one of a kind desk to the point where it wouldn't even be useful for kindling. The commotion was loud enough that it had stirred several people, Steve included. But he told them to stay back, not wanting anyone else to get involved. That's when he began to plead with her.

Bucky knew she could understand Russian, she had caught him whispering it to her one night when he had thought she was asleep. It was little words, a poem, nothing major but the sheepish grin that pulled on her lips gave it away. Calin said she understood it but didn't know how to speak it well, so he was hoping this shared memory would trigger her to come back to him.

He whispered and pleaded as the girl focused her attention on him again, lifting him up without even touching him. A swirl of black smoke engulfing his body slowly. The final, please, seemed to grab her though. The black in her eyes flickering back and forth between her hazel ones, before she shook her head violently. Yelling out in disgust, clearly upset with what was happening. Calins hands moved, dropping him to the ground with a loud thud as she screamed out louder, the sound so guttural that it had him wincing before the darkness completely dissipated. Her body collapsing soon after.

“I didn't mean to do that.” Her scared voice brought Bucky back to reality. Causing him to pull her tighter to his chest. His head leaning down to rest against her. “You h-have to believe m-me.”

She looked exhausted, as his metal hand came to sooth her cheek. “Its ok, I have you now. I've got you Cal.” He whispered, gently wiping away the stray tears that began to roll down her face. She never cried, never in the whole time he'd known her. So Bucky knew this was serious, and it made his chest tighten painfully. He was at a loss, and it killed him to think he couldn't do anything to put Calin at ease.

He felt her arms wrap around him, burying her face into the front of his shirt. His eyes looking over her tired form, seeing most of the team standing there silently with looks of both shock and concern.

The hall was a war zone of drywall bits and over turned furniture. Broken glass dotted the floor, a clear reminder she had literally shattered every window in sight with little more than a flick of her finger.

After a few hesitant minutes, Bucky saw Steve inch his way closer, hands out in surrender. “Buck… I think we should get you two to the med bay.” His voice remained calm as he spoke, not wanting to startle the girl who was plastered to his best friends chest. “Calin? What do you think kid. Can you do that for us?” Steve addressed her this time, seeing her back quack beneath her sweatshirt.

Calin swallowed thickly, listening to her friend, her fingers bunching in the fabric of Bucky's shirt. “Y-yeah.”

Shifting ever so slowly till she was sitting up, Calin viciously wiped at her tear stain cheeks. Feeling Bucky’s hand gently rest on her back to keep her steady.

“Can you guys give us a second?” Bucky asked, as he rubbed circles into her back calmingly. His eyes looking over the crowd that was still congregating in the hall. Wanda and Nat looked the most upset, and if he didn't say anything the two would try to be right over here. Bucky knew Calin wouldn't want that attention. It was a sign of weakness to her, and she hated to seem weak.

He could sense the shame and embarrassment rolling off her in waves just sitting there. Watching as her heavy lidded eyes scanned the destruction she had left behind. Bucky didn't want her to stress out further, that was the last thing they all needed at the moment.

“No problem.” Steve nodded his head at his friend before turning around. “Lets go people, back to bed.” He motioned with his arms, making everyone slowly make their way back towards their rooms. His head turning back once to check on them before he disappeared behind his door. Out of sight but still within earshot incase a situation came up again.

Leaving Bucky alone with Calin.

She had said nothing, her eyes blankly staring out at the Bucky sized hole in Tony's wall. An ache in her chest forming, thinking about what she probably did to him that did that kind of damage.

“Hey, I'm fine.” Bucky smoothed her hair, knowing that Calin was dwelling on what had just happened. Ever since she sat up her eyes hadn't left the hole in the wall. But when his words didn't seem to pull her from her thoughts, his hand came up, timidly moving her chin so she was eye to eye with him. “Cal… I'm more worried about you darling. I know I shouldn't have grabbed you like that, it was stupid on my part.”

“It.. it reminded me of how the guards used to grab me.” She says absentmindedly, her gaze dropping to her wrists that were covered by the sleeves of the sweatshirt. “They broke my wrists a couple times…” Her voice was small, as she slid the fabric up slightly. Bucky's eyes settling on the faded scares that adorned the inside of her wrists. They were relatively small in size and if she hadn't drawn attention to them he would have never even known.

With slow calculating movements Bucky took one of her hands in his own, bringing her wrist to his lips. Kissing the soft blistering flesh ever so gently wishing he could take all that pain away with it.

This was big for him, in two ways. One, Calin had just willing told him something about her past. A topic that had been tight lipped from the moment she arrived at the tower. Even though it angered him to know someone manhandled her so hard they snapped her wrist. It was quite a feet to be honest, since Calin was no weakling. And two, he had just kissed her. It may have been innocently placed on her wrist, but it was all he could ever ask for. A chance… one moment to show her what she meant to him. That he loved her too Goddamn much to lose her.

Bucky's hand continued to make small circles on her back, his eyes watching her carefully. She seemed lost, her fingers nervously fiddling with the edge of her fraying sweatshirt. Picking at the loose strings over and over again.

“It's gonna happen again.” Her voice broke the silence after a few minutes. It was hoarse, as if she had just spent the last hour screaming.

Furrowing his brows Bucky stiffened, “Now?” He cautiously asked, hoping it wasn't the case. Her powers were beyond whatever his super soldier abilities could handle. She'd crush him with little more than a blink of an eye.

Letting out a small breath, Calin shook her head before glancing up at Bucky. “No.” Her eyes panned his tired drawn in face, the scruff on his face heavier than normal. The large gash she put in the side of his cheek still bleeding, leaving trails of crimson liquid running down to his chin. “I'm sorry.” She quietly added, using her sleeve to wipe away the blood. “I was so worried I was going to lose you Bucky. That I wouldn't be able to come back in time to stop myself…”

Another wave of stinging tears threatened to emerge, welling behind her eyes dangerously. But in an instant she felt Bucky's arm tighten around her body. His vibranium fingers dancing softly against the skin of her cheek, making her eyes meet his own again. “I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere. If you need to, I will sit right here in this hallway all day with you.” He whispered softly.

She was so close to him, he could smell the sweet scent of green apple from her body spray. It drew him like a month to a burning hot flame. Against his better judgement he moved his face a bit closer to hers, watching for any signs of distress. But when she continued to silently watch, her breathing steady he took his chance. “Can.. Can I kiss you?” He asked for permission first, knowing Calin needed to feel safe. She needed to agree to it before he'd do anything rash.

Narrowing her eyes, she felt her heart begin to race. He was dangerously close, and her mind was swirling. This seemed like some cruel joke to her, having Bucky like this. Maybe she was still trapped in her mind and her demon was giving her something to keep her occupied. If that was the case, why not just play along. Why not just give in… Maybe find some kind of peace? Even if it was just fake.

Calin nodded her head hesitantly, not dropping her gaze. A small smile tugged at Bucky's lips, and his fingers cupped her cheek ever so gently. His movements soft and meticulous as not to startle her. Bucky hesitated only for a second, looking into her eyes trying to read the emotions hidden in them. Searching for any sign that her mind may have changed, but when he was met with nothing, he leaned in closer and let his lips gently brush against Calins. Her eyes fluttered closed instantly at the contact, and Bucky revelled in the heat.

It was a sweet, innocent kiss, and Bucky left it at that. Pulling away just enough so his forehead rested against her own. “I waited too long to do that. I've waited too long for a lot of things Calin. And I need you to know… there was never anyone else. I pulled away ‘cause I thought I was going to hurt you.” Bucky closed his eyes as he spoke, knowing he had to come clean once and for all, to just tell her the truth. This was his shot. “I've been having these nightmares… where I kill you, and I couldn't handle it. I just didn't want them to come true. There's no way I could live with myself if your blood was on my hands.” He breathed out fearfully, both hands cupping her face now. Needing to touch her, needing to show her the fear he had felt when those images flooded his mind.

Calin froze at this words, letting the weight of them sink in. He had pulled away because of nightmares? Almost the same type of nightmares she had been having?

Letting out a huff, Calin shook her head with an annoyed groan. She knew exactly what was going on now, feeling incredibly stupid for not seeing it sooner. Her demon… this was all it's doing. It fucked with Bucky so he'd leave her, and it knew how big of a blow that'd be. It had been the first crack in the impervious armor she had built up over the years. Then to hammer the final nail in the coffin, it conjured up nightmares for Calin as well. Breaking down her walls just enough to slip right through. This was all calculated, planned out so it could escape. The smart little bitch. Calin knew it had been fucking with herself… but to go after someone else… that was new, something that seemed impossible. But the similarities were striking, too coincidental to ignore. It was growing stronger clearly. Which wasn't good.

Seeing how dejected Bucky looked, Calin leaned in and pressed her lips against his softly again. Her body almost needing another taste, just to make sure it was real. Because in truth, she still didn't believe this was actually occurring.

“Let's go find Tony… I think it's time you guys know what happened. At least so you know what you're dealing with.” She murmured against his lips. “I owe it to you.” Closing her eyes, she felt his hands leave her face and carefully found purchase around her waist.

It was time to face the demons of her past and present.

Tags: @this-kitty-has-claws @debbienewnes84 @peacefulwriter88 @zofty15 @xgminigypsy @greenhands5 @toniinhere @buckysinthesinbin @imsupernaturalbaby @prettybubblesintheair @leijona-writes @lukescool @melaninmarvel @sophiealiice @iamwarrenspeace @badassbaker @rediscoveringdebbie84 @zofty15 @readtosurvivemusictolive @whirlybirbs @projectxhappiness @imeannooffensebabybut @its-daydreamer23

#End of Me #Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky x oc #bucky barnes x plus size reader #fluff #marvel #winter solider imagine #winter solider #bucky barnes x reader

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howlingourcolors · 7 years

Text

HURT

"She used to love me alot" Episode.03 Jon groans as he grasps the arms of last night's seat that became his bed. He pulls himself forward onto his feet into a crouch as the room spins and for all his efforts spills sloppily onto the floor. He lays there for moment letting the cool tile lower his hightened body temperature. Ragged breaths desperately trying to sate the ache in his lungs that follows a night of drinking and chain smoking, the only sound in the room until sudden slow steps began pounding against his ear drums. Boots. Heavy boots. They didn't belong to anyone in the clan, he had memorized the sound of their footsteps. No one wore boots, and stomped that heavily, or had a limp. The sudden realization sent a surge of half sobering adrenaline crashing through his body and he jumped to his feet which slipped from under him in his still drunken state. As he fell, Jon's reflex took half assed effect and he reached back and drew his hidden fixed blade from his belt. Jon lands ass first with his knife point aimed at a shrouded figure. Broad shoulders cloaked with a heavy black jacket and face half hidden by a black cowboy hat, the stranger stops a 5 foot distance away from Jon. "The fuck is this? I'll take care of it if you want Jon." The wind croons in Jon's head which he jerks to one side in a quick snapping fashion. "Shut up" Jon barks aloud. "I know you aren't talking to me son." The shadowed figure smiles. Wood scraping against tile as he pulls a chair closer and takes his backward seat, arms crossing over the back of the chair, the man in black removes his hat which let's loose waves of salt and pepper over his eyes, he runs his hand back and through his hair, revealing a weathered face. He must be at least sixty and two scars running across each cheek send warning signals flooding though out Jon's brain as tension grips his whole body, ready to spring. No one has scars like that without a reason and walking around with said scars just says he was the victor of whatever endeavor that cause them. "Relax. I'm just here to talk." The stranger sighs. His voice soothing, not really one of the cowboy he resembled. "Odhin. In case you were wondering Jon. My name is Odhin. Yes like the god but no I ain't no god. You ain't gotta be scared boy, you can put your pig sticker away. I'm here to help you." Jon stares for a moment, reading body language and facial expression, breathing in the miniscule pheromones that others could not smell and finally, accessing the deeper talents of his brain, expands his Astral conscienceness towards the man. This particular ability allowed Jon to sense a person's intentions and in general, allowed him a glimpse into what kind of person they might be. But even as he expanded his field it was met by a seemingly impenetrable wall. Taken aback Jon forces his conscienceness forward again with no reserve only to be met again by a wall of iron and suddenly, with a force he had never experienced before, Jon's astral body is forced back and surrounded on all sides and forced into a ball. Panic screams in his mind but he is held physically still by this unknown force. "Did you really think you were the only one Jon?" Odhin's voice streaming directly into Jon's head as his eyes widen in disbelief. "Yes." He gasps softly as a deep chuckle bounces off of the walls of his cranium. "Well you're not son. There's plenty of us if you only cared to look." Odhin's deep voice careening throughout Jon's very being. "Now I'm here to help you. So don't go doing anything stupid like trying to fight me. You won't win. But listen. And I'll lead you down your way." The iron wall retreats from Jon and he gasps as he regains control of his limbs, dropping his knife and scrambling away until he hits his heavy chair which he then carefully raises himself into, his whole body weak from liquor consumption and the shock of his astral assault. Jon sits for several moments just breathing before finally speaking in a soft relinquishing tone. "Who are you?" The cowboy waits several moments before speaking with a soft smile on his face. "I am what you could be." Silence filling the space between them, a heavy, anxious wait for Jon at this point. "I am what happens when you live several lives Howl" The punctuation on the last word sends shivers down Jon's back. "Howl?" Jon raises his eyebrow in question. "Whoops. Sorry. You're not supposed to know that yet hahah!!!" Another silence takes a minute between the two. "Let's just say. I know of the time before you were born and the time that is to come after I am gone." "How?" The question a quick and sharp jab into the mystery of Odhin's presence, for whatever reason, maybe it was just his air of overwhelming sureness, or maybe it was the crushing force of his mental capabilities, Jon believed him, and wanted to know more. "Our kind has many, many gifts as you very well know. Some of us can read minds, move things without touching them, travel back and forth through time, speak to the spirits of the universe! And sometimes those spirits will tell us things they feel we need to know, whether it be mundane observations or secrets that will be catalysts for the change of time and space themselves." A long silence followed then, and a slight tremble overtook Jon as he processed the information that had been shoved onto him. Others like him. He thought he had felt the presence of or touch of people that were beyond the norm but until now he had never been confronted by anyone or had it confirmed and in such an eye opening fashion. At this point his post drunken stupor had finally worn off and he felt the screeching burn of thirst tear at his throat. Having seemingly read his mind Odhin stands and makes his way to the bar, he pours himself a glass of whisky and fills another with water which he hands to Jon who accepts it gratefully and takes the cool, soothing liquid in large rapid drafts. Jon lightly places the glass on the table and gathers himself up in his seat before questioning, "So why are you here?" Odhin's gaze buries into Jon's own steel blue eyes and with a steady and firm voice asks, "That girl you went to see yesterday, at the cemetery, who was she? The question sends a rack of nervous energy through Jon, as if he had been suddenly electrocuted. "She... was the light of my life... the one that made everything ok. All the bad I have done, and all the people I've hurt.... she made it all okay..." his eyes burning, Jon drew in a deep breathe and slowly released it before reaching into the inner breast pocket of his overcoat to retrieve his cigarettes. Jon retrieves one and lights it, taking a long drag and expelling the cloud of smoke into the dim light of the bar before asking, "Why?" "How did she die? The question stabbing deeply into Jon's heart once again. "I guess she had an accident, I wasn't around. We hadn't seen each other for a few years.... I was told that there was some kind of gas leak... and a spark..." Jon's voice quivered for half a second before steeling himself and gripping the arm of his chair. "She didn't deserve that... she was so wonderful. She was always kind, compassionate, sweetest thing you would ever find." A wide smile spreading across Jon's face as his brain started pulling memories from his limbic system. "She had a smile brighter than the sun. She would do whatever she could for others. And having a bad day was a huge no no with her. She never let anyone feel sad or lonliness..." Jon trailed off as he stared into the field of days gone past. "Jon. I'm sorry for your loss. And for your pain. But I'm here to tell you. It wasn't an accident." Confusion and rage swelled in massive waves throughout Jon's body as his head began to pound and his vision pulsed. "What do you mean?!?!" Jon stood quickly then, knocking the small table to the side, sending both their glasses shattering to the ground. "Who are you?!?! What do you know?!?!" Shaking violently Jon shot forward and grasped the collar of Odhin's jacket then "Tell me!!!" Odhin's palm struck Jon in the dead center of his chest, sending Jon flying several yards through the air, knocking over his seat, and into the wall. With the air from his lungs gone and his head swimming from his head cracking against the wall Jon looses a silent scream, clawing at the searing pain in his chest as his lungs desperately try to suck in much needed oxygen. Again the loud thud of boots invade his hearing, except this time there is the added power of anger in the steps and as Jon gasps in the first few painful breaths of air Odhin grabs him by his own collar and pulls him up to his feet and plants him into the wall. "I told you not to fight me Jon. That was very disrespectful. Now, as I said before. I'm here to help you. And before I continue to help you, I expect a goddamned apology!!" Odhin's roar crashing back off the wall amplifying his discontent. "I'm sorry." Jon manages between ragged breaths. "Good." Came the curt reply before helping Jon back into his now righted seat. "I didn't like doing that Jon. But do not disrespect me. Now. As I was saying before your little outburst. It wasn't an accident. It wasn't a gas leak, it was a bomb. Someone killed her." "But why???" Jon crooned, the pain apparent in his voice and face. "To hurt you. Because they knew what she meant to you and wanted to see you suffer. I don't know who. The spirits haven't conveyed that information. All I know is what I've told you so far." "But why are you telling me all of this? Why does it matter to you?" "Because the spirits say you and your journey are important. You're meant to do something Jon. Whatever this path of yours is, it is important you succeed." "But why???" "Because it's beneficial to the good of the universe Jon!!! Goddamn it!! You ask too many fucking questions!! Look, that's all i have for you right now, but just a tad of advice. You need to stop being so scared all of the damn time." Odhin's face grew soft then and his demeanor lightened. "I know you're scared. I know you don't want to hurt people.. but sometimes people need to be hurt Jon. It's the way of the world. Most of the time the people getting hurt are good people, innocents. So do something about it. Make a difference, you have the capabilities. Use that voice in your head for a greater good Jon. Be the greatness that I know you can be son." With that, Odhin spun and made for the door, and as he pulled the nob a thought occurred to Jon. "Why do you keep calling me son?" Odhin stops dead in his wake, still facing the door. "Take care of your self Jon. I'll see you soon." @bolontiku

#Jon #Manhattan #Jon Manhattan #HURT #Violet #Odhin #Astral #Astral plane #Astral body #Universe #The Clan #Fiction #powers #voices

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