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ceilidho · 2 months

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take me home, country road

[ao3]

You have nothing on your person apart from a hastily packed suitcase and the dress you came into town wearing, on the run from trouble back home. Too bad John's missing a bride that matches your description. Or: the 1800s (mistaken) mail order bride au (part 7)

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6

You watch him like a hawk after that.

Not because anything’s changed. In fact, nothing’s changed. Seeing him drag a man by the collar of his shirt, the look in his eyes punishing and severe, has only confirmed the essential imbalance in your relationship. You don’t suffer the same fate as that man being dragged from the bar not because of mercy or leniency or forgiveness, but because the truth hasn’t yet come out. You’re safe because the truth is still hidden, a fact that could change at the drop of a hat.

The thought makes you wary. You watch John in the days after with a scrutiny that borders on the paranoid. Does he already know? Has he left you stewing in ignorance all this time while waiting for the proper authorities to arrive? When he looks at you, does he see the blood on your hands? Does he know that he’s looking at a murderer? Does he know that your sins weigh on you like heavy stones dragging you down into the earth?

Every time the porch steps creak, your heart turns to stone and betrayal rushes up your throat like acid, and it burns.

Then the door opens and John walks in. His face lights up when his eyes fall on you. “Hi darlin’.”

All you can do is let out a shuddering breath and slump into his embrace.

You’re waiting for it to happen. Even when he pulls you into his chest at night, a big arm settled around your waist and his palm spread wide over your belly, you tense and wait for the truth to come out. But all he does is sigh and fall asleep, tucking you closer into his chest. You stare at the wall until the grooves between the wooden boards start to expand, the darkness encompassing every inch of the wall before bleeding down to the floorboards and up to the ceiling. Then you wake up and it’s the next day.

The truth is imminent. It shines its light on the darkened path before it and stalks forward. You cower in the shadows waiting for it to find you, hopeful that it won’t. Sure that it will.

There’s never a good moment to pack your bags and leave, and the longer you stay—as the days turn into a week since you first disembarked from the train and wandered into a town soaked in russet and red—the harder it seems to get a moment of peace. Though John wasn’t exaggerating when he said that a sheriff’s job never stops, you hadn’t thought that it would involve so much.

Between chores and John and the townsfolk, you can’t get a moment to yourself. The closest you come to it is when Kate leaves you to your thoughts while she helps the customers. Even then, she still comes by every now and again to offer you a tea or brandy ball to suck on.

You resent the idea that you need to be babysat, but he isn’t exactly wrong either. You’re not too stubborn to admit that. Under Kate’s watchful eye, you aren’t scurrying off anywhere. Instead, you help out around the shop where you can, offering to stock the shelves and sweep the floors. On occasion, you even get on your hands and knees in front of the shop to pull up the weeds, but that draws more attention than you’re comfortable with. They simply aren’t as concerned with weeds out here.

Most of your time is spent loitering around town waiting for John to take you home. Sometimes you join him for the day, trailing along after him when he goes out to collect the taxes or you accompany him when he has to attend trials and hearings in the court house, where you sit quietly in the public gallery and watch in rapt attention as the magistrate conducts the court proceedings, but there are days where that’s simply not possible.

“You’re gonna spend the day with Laswell, alright?” John tells you, pinching your chin to tilt your head up.

He loves that little gesture, you’ve realized. Loves to touch you and guide you with a hand on your back or chin or arm, a hand brushing down the side of your waist to pull you in, gripping you by the nape of your neck just to hold. Even now, in broad daylight and in front of the window to the general store where anyone could look out and see the two of you, he keeps his thumb there, reluctant to let you go. The thought makes your neck go hot.

“When will you be back?” you ask.

“Later this afternoon—before dusk, so don’t go worrying about heading home without me. I have to see to something a few towns over.”

“Oh…what do they need you for?”

John frowns. “You’ve got an awful lot of questions today.”

“Never mind. Have a safe trip.” You don’t know why his reluctance to tell you anything frustrates you so, especially when he has good reason to, but even you can hear the way your voice grows petulant.

His thumb squeezes against your chin, holding your head in place when you try to turn away. “I’m overseeing a hanging. Couple of men were found guilty of murder.” He studies you so intensely that he can practically see in your eyes the way your stomach turns at that. “See, I thought that might upset you. This is why I didn’t wanna tell you, darlin’.”

“It’s fine,” you say, swallowing. “I’m a big girl.”

“Yeah,” John agrees, brushing his thumb up your chin until it tugs at your bottom lip, watching the way it snaps back into place when he releases it.

He makes every moment feel like a last goodbye and a homecoming. You almost can’t meet his eyes under the intensity of his stare, but you also can’t look away. Not with how he looks at you like some precious thing.

You expect it before it happens, but when he dips his head to plant a soft kiss on your lips, you go breathless for a moment. His beard is bristly against your skin, just south of coarse. The kiss turns into another, even more tender than the first. You resent the way you lean forward when he pulls away, chasing after him.

“You be good for Miss Kate, okay?” he says, waiting for your reassurance.

“I will,” you rasp, mortified at how easily he unravels you and how plainly you let it show. John grins when he hears the tremble in your voice.

Then he leaves, riding off towards where the horizon dips below the visible and you watch until he disappears completely, falling away with it. Kate beckons you inside after that, and it’s just hot enough out that you gather up the skirt of your dress and follow after her, climbing up the steps to the general store.

Kate is a tough nut to crack. She’s kind and never rebuffs your questions when you make conversation, but she also isn’t exactly forthcoming with personal information. She seems more than happy to let the conversation lapse into silence. When there isn’t a customer to serve, she’ll take out a leather-bound notebook and write, going so deep into her own thoughts that you sometimes need to call her name a couple times before she’ll respond.

“Kate,” you say again, waiting for her to finally blink and look up, which she does with only the faintest glimmer of impatience in her eyes. “Care to join me on a walk? I need to stretch my legs and…well, I don’t know my way around just yet.”

She snaps her book shut, winding a bit of string around it before placing it back beneath the counter. “There’s a restaurant on the other side of town if you care for a bite as well. I could do with something to eat.”

It’s not as much of a walk as you might have expected. You learn along the way that Kate has lived in town for several years, taking the shop over from her predecessor, a former employer prone to drinking and prone to expiring from that very same vice. She speaks of him with familiarity and affection for the dead, but none of the longing and misery that you’ve come to expect from someone grieving a loss.

“You came far just to find a husband,” she remarks when the two of you are seated at a windowside booth in the restaurant. She spreads a cloth over her lap and you follow her lead.

You bite your lip. “I’ve heard good things about the frontier.”

Kate looks amused by that. “Now who’s been lying to you?”

You laugh, half genuine and half to keep the atmosphere light. You don’t tell her that no one lied to you about going out west because no one had said those words to you in the first place. There hadn’t been enough time for a conversation after the event, only enough time to unlock the study door and wash your hands of the blood in the sink downstairs before fleeing the manor with only your purse and cardigan, the feather duster still lying on the floor upstairs. You hadn’t even bothered going home.

There’s no telling what your aunt and uncle must have thought. You try not to think about that because there’s no going back now. You had the luxury of a single cry on the train as it chugged away from the station and the day slipped into night, but nothing more than that and nothing since.

You tuck into your food when the waitress comes back with your meal.

“John said you were a schoolteacher before this?” Kate says, pulling you back into the conversation.

It makes you nervous to lie too much about a subject you hardly know, so you smile and nod instead of responding.

“You must be quite the polymath,” she continues, eyes downcast, not allowing you a good read on her. “Arithmetic, writing, history—goodness knows the skills one needs nowadays with the leaps and bounds in education. Thank goodness for the Common School reformers, giving women the opportunity to develop young minds.”

“Yes,” you croak, then clear your throat. “I certainly did my best to…educate the children.”

Comical, given that you’d dropped out of school at the age of fourteen to work in a factory sewing buttons onto shirts.

“And was the profession enjoyable? I know John mentioned you were keener on starting a family than continuing on as an instructor, but was it an informative experience?”

“Oh yes, it was. I enjoyed it. Immensely.”

“It must have been nice to work in a profession with such little turmoil.”

“I couldn’t have asked for better,” you agree, your smile tight now, wavering only a bit at the corners.

Kate stares at you for a beat too long. It makes your stomach hurt and you fight against the urge to wilt under her stare. You can’t imagine you’ve said something wrong with how little you’ve said, but her stare makes your skin crawl.

Finally, she smiles, the skin around her eyes creasing. “Well, that’s just lovely to hear.”

You put the conversation out of your mind on the walk back, sure that you must have imagined the flicker in her eyes.

John comes back earlier than you expected. You swear your heart jolts in your chest when you hear the sound of a horse whinnying outside the shop out of nowhere and a man’s low, rough voice responding back, soothing it. You hear the sound of dismount, boots hitting the ground hard, and then come up the steps, each step making the spurs on the back of his boots rattle.

When he opens the door, his eyebrows jump up at the sight of you already there waiting. Your eagerness should embarrass you, and it does, but there’s not much you can do about it, and there’s even less you can do about the way you melt when he says, “There you are, darlin’. Time to go home.”

Precious is the world where home has come to mean something tender and soft, even as much as you’ve pushed against it. You still hold fast against the notion, steeling yourself when John helps you up onto Buttercup and follows suit, riding home at almost a gallop. You hear his laughter on the wind when you yelp and nearly slide off, his arm around you the only thing holding you in place.

“It’d be easier to ride if I had pants,” you complain when you dismount, hands pressed to his shoulders when he helps you down. “How do women even ride sidesaddle on their own?”

“Plenty of women do, darlin’. It’s nothing out of the ordinary.”

“Well, I don’t like it.”

“We can get you pants if you need them so badly,” John says, looking up to the sky like Lord help me suffer this woman. “But that means I’ll be teaching you how to ride Buttercup on your own. Think you can handle that?”

You balk at the thought. “…Let me think about it.”

He snorts. “You do that.”

He leaves you to your thoughts when he takes the horses out to the paddock for a bit.

You sit out on the porch and watch the sunset while the horses run around the pen, soaking in the last hour of daylight. Overhead, clouds as big as mountains pass, heavy like an oil painting. Off in the distance, you can see thick clouds blotting out the sky entirely, the belly of them split open and letting out a downpour of biblical proportions. You only grow a bit nervous when you notice the wall of rain moving closer to your house with the wind, inching forward more every minute.

It’s not long before John notices it too. He whistles for the horses and waits until they trot back over to the gate, fixing the lead to their mantles again and leading them one by one back into the stable. A light drizzle begins to pour. It churns up the dust and dirt when it hits the ground, scenting the air with the fragrant smell of earth.

You head over to the stable as John brings in the last horse, hovering by the door while you watch him run his hand down Buttercup’s muzzle, whispering softly to her. If he notices your presence, he doesn’t acknowledge it, his attention focused solely on her.

It gives you a chance to admire him from the back. Thick thighs in indigo jeans that seem almost painted on. Shirt tucked into his jeans, stretched taut at the shoulders; dark droplets of rain drying already. The dusting of hair on the back of his neck. You can see the fine lines on his forehead and in the corner of his eye from the side angle and it reminds you again that he’s older and more weathered than you, settled into his age rather than floundering in it.

“It’s raining,” you say, just to have something to say. You shrink under his gaze when he turns towards you, faint amusement in his eyes.

“I noticed.”

You cringe at that, aware that he knows. He’s the one that brought the horses in after all. There’s just something in you that feels compelled to open your mouth when he’s around. An impulse that makes you cheep like a bird.

“Looks like a bad one,” you mutter instead of shutting your mouth, instead of hightailing it back to the house and shutting all the windows to keep the rain from coming in. Useless girl.

“Probably rain all night,” John says, squinting out at the sky through the open door. It’s darker now, a storm brewing.

“Is there…is there anything we have to do? To get ready?” You don’t know why you say we like this is a partnership, but it comes unbidden and you know if he told you to hurry back and take in the porch chairs, you would.

“Nothing to worry about. I’ll close up the stables and seal the windows—storm probably won’t hit for another hour or two. After dinner, we’ll turn in early.”

With a final stroke down Buttercup’s jaw, he steps away and moves towards you. You feel rooted in place again at his approach; the thought of taking a step back never even occurs to you. When he finally reaches you, he doesn’t hesitate to reel you in by your hips, drawing you into a deep, wet kiss that he breaks only when you whimper into his mouth.

“You feelin’ better about being out here?” he asks, low and intimately. “Looked like you had a good time with Laswell.”

“She’s nice,” you say, deflecting from the other question.

John hums his agreement, readjusting his hold on your waist until every inch of him is pressed against you. Your breasts are flattened to his chest, belly pressed to his; every hard inch of him, solid as an oak.

“C’mon, honey, talk to me,” he murmurs. “Have I been treating you right? You still have any reservations about marrying me?”

“Bit late for reservations, isn’t it?”

He clucks his tongue. “‘Course it ain’t. Won’t change anything, but I still wanna know.”

It’s hard not to consider the possibility of being honest with him for a change when his gaze borders on the devout. No one in the history of time has ever looked at you like this, like you hung up the moon and stars. The thought chokes you up. In all the years of your life, has one other person looked at you and asked if everything was to your liking? John’s love borders on reverence, straddles the narrow divide between the telluric and the celestial, the earthly and the divine.

It’s dizzying. And you’re not built for subterfuge. Not built to lie to the one man that, despite everything, despite taking you from your former life by force, has offered you a new one on a silver platter.

You wet your lips, conscious of how dry your mouth suddenly is. John’s eyes follow the glide of your tongue over your lip.

And then you lie. “None whatsoever. I’m happy here.”

Maybe it’s a half-lie. After he shuts the stable doors and barricades them to keep the doors from swinging open in the midst of the storm, you wind up back on the porch watching the dark clouds up in the sky slowly approach, John at your back this time.

John tilts your head up into another kiss. You don’t know when you made the conscious decision to let him think you amenable to this relationship, but you cling to that thought desperately when his tongue licks into your mouth velvety smooth.

The roof extends out over the porch, keeping the two of you dry, but you can hear the sound of raindrops pelting the slate shingles.

“You’ll see, honey,” he says against your lips, the words rumbling through you, buzzing under your skin and making it tingle. “‘M gonna make you so happy. Never gonna even think of leaving me.”

The words dissolve on your tongue. Swallowed down dry. With his arm hooked around your waist and hand tilting your head up, there’s no way you could think of anything else except wanting more.

It’s hard to talk when he has you up against the railing, your dress pulled up and his fingers spreading apart your lower lips. It’s not the first time he’s touched you there, but it’s the longest he has, at least without the barrier of your underwear. His fingers spread your labia delicately, middle finger running up the wet seam. He hums into the back of your head while he does and presses a kiss into your hair.

“Always so soft and wet here, darlin’,” John murmurs, stroking his fingers up your inner lips and petting the sensitive nub at the apex of your sex. “Why didn’t you tell me you’ve been aching for it? Been waiting for you to give me the word.”

Waiting, he says, while tucking a finger into your sex, curling it up into you and chuckling under his breath when your hands clamp tighter on the railing and your back arches. Just a single finger feels like more than you can handle. John has thick fingers; thick fingers with calluses that you can feel on the delicate flesh between your legs. It plugs you up tight, more so when your core clenches involuntarily around his finger. His chuckle descends into a groan, then a sigh.

He pulls his finger out against the squeeze of your internal muscles, ignoring the way you whisper, “No, please” under your breath.

You only stop pleading for more when he swirls his finger around your pearl again, lavishing it with attention. “Aching? I’m not—”

“You are, darlin’,” he breathes, and now you feel him pull you from the railing, stepping back to take a seat on the porch swing. He pulls you into his lap, sitting you across it instead of with your back to his chest like he did in the bath the other day.

“Anyone could come by—” you hiss, fluffing the skirt of your dress out around your thighs when he tries to push it back up to get his hands back on your nethers.

“You tense up when you’re nervous, honey,” John cuts you off, forcing his hand back up your dress until he pushes his finger back into your quim, delighted to find it hotter and wetter, practically dripping onto his lap. “See, there you go. Just relax. I’ll make you feel good, darlin’. We’ll take care of that nasty ache.”

You pant through each pulse of his finger. You don’t even think about looking up to meet his eyes, not when he stares down at you with obvious adoration and devotion, the emotion splayed across his face. He looks entranced at the sight of you coming apart on his fingers, a flush high on his cheeks.

“No one’s gonna come by. Not this far out. ‘Sides, they know to keep their distance. Newlyweds need their space, right, darlin’?”

Supposing he’s right and no one comes out this way. Isn’t it still unseemly to do this out in the open? So far from your marriage bed? John seems incapable of relegating his affections to that space, unconcerned with propriety or modesty. You wonder with a spark of fear if he’d even budge if someone were to come trotting up the walkway on horseback or if he’d just wave them off and send them on their way. You don’t think he’s the kind of man to want an audience, thank the Lord, but he seems entirely unphased by even the idea of being intruded upon.

You melt when he shushes your worries, feeling you tense against him, and sinks his fingers in deeper, now another. Don’t fret, he murmurs against your temple, sighing softly. I’ve got you, honey. Ain’t going nowhere.

You aren’t, are you, you think wildly. The land around here goes on forever and the train whistles by only twice a week if you’re lucky. Then townsfolk know you by face and a false name, but that would be enough for them to grow concerned if they were to spot you heading for the train with your suitcases packed, and with John or one of his deputies always in town, there’s little chance you’d be able to board without one of them interfering.

Still though, it’s better than the alternative. For over a week now you’ve been on high alert, waiting for an arrest warrant to be slipped onto John’s desk with your likeness drawn on it, and for him to come collect you stone-faced and furious. It could still come.

He keeps you tucked into his arms and nestled close, shushing you when you hiccup and pinch your lips together to keep quiet. He lets you have that, unphased by the way you try to hide it, only tutting when you try to fight it, curling his fingers up inside you and rubbing a spot inside of you that makes it hard to breathe.

“I could just take it, but you’re gonna give it to me, darlin’,” John says.

And you do. Messily, noisily. Burying your face in his neck and sobbing it out, humiliation wrung out of you, squeezing out every drop. He smells like musk and old sweat, amber warm. Liquid gold. You press your nose into the skin of his neck and draw in a breath so deep that you go lightheaded.

John keeps his fingers tucked in you until you stop shaking, talking you through it even though you hardly hear a word. How could you over the rush in your head, the blood in your ears? When you open your eyes and look around, the sky is swollen and dark, the wall of rain

“C’mon, honey,” he says, pulling his fingers out and placing his hand low on your belly. “Let’s go inside.”

You sit across from him at dinner, eating under candlelight. The weight of his gaze for once isn’t stifling.

The rain only starts in earnest when he’s pulled the quilt over the two of you and pulled you into his arms. The rain pelting the windowpane dulls to a low roar when you turn over and snuggle deeper into John’s chest, pulling the blanket over your head. Tomorrow, the grass will be greener than the day before. You can feel it in your bones.

#ceil writing #cod mw2 #cod x reader #price x you #john price x reader #price x reader #price/reader #john price/reader #john price

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dreamii-yume · 7 months

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Aight, for my first proper thirst post after my long vacation, I present to you :

This fucking music video. Oh, Kayano Mikoto, the woman that you have made me 🧎‍♀️

But no, this music video is actually very sad 😭 Because not only does it confirms Mikoto having another personality, but this song is sung almost entirely by that other personality—“John” as Es calls him, short for “John Doe”

Mikoto is a tragic character y’all, I know we were all hornii about him during his first trial ☠️ But goddamn, his story is one of my favorites to dissect.

I really believed Mikoto when he said that he couldn’t remember a thing about his murders, because he doesn’t seem like he’s lying and seemed genuinely confused—So, I ended up entertaining the theory that his brain is actually erasing the memory due to trauma ☠️ One anon even theorized that Mikoto himself is the one doing the murder, and “John” is the one trying to protect him, which was something I started to believe in for a while—BUT THEN HIS SECOND TRIAL DROPPED AND HOO BOI, there’s a lot to unpack here lol

First of all, contrary to popular belief, Mikoto is now proven to be a kind character, he doesn’t have ill intentions. He’s a people-pleaser, who always bottles up his feelings and would end up suffering because of this. You could tell from how exhausted he looks, yet he keeps up a smile when talking to other people like his mom so they wouldn’t worry about him. But he’s not okay 😭

Eventually, the stress from his job got to him so bad that “John” was born to protect him from breaking. It’s currently unknown who or how many he killed, but it seems to imply from the Drama CD that it was a bunch of strangers that happened to irritate “John”, so he came out and killed them.

One thing to point out most of all here is that “John” is not evil—He didn’t kill just for laughs, he killed to protect Mikoto. He knows how kind Mikoto is, but just couldn’t handle the fact that the world mistreats Mikoto so much, taking advantage of his kindness. “John” cares for Mikoto, he was born to do things that Mikoto couldn’t do, because he just can’t sit there and watch as Mikoto break down.

“John” even expresses his distaste for us, the viewers/voters, for calling Mikoto a liar and making him seem like a villain in the first trial. Us, voting him Guilty/Unforgivable only made Mikoto’s stress-level sky-rocket so “John” comes out more in Milgram.

But his music video tells us that “John” does regret his actions. But I don’t think it’s the “I regret killing those people” kind of regret, it’s the “I regret making Mikoto suffer even more by killing those people” kind of regret, because look where that got the both of them. “John” practically ruined Mikoto’s life by trying to save/protect him, hence why I think he was apologizing to Mikoto at the end instead, not to us.

In the Drama CD, “John” basically admits to his murders, but begs Es to forgive/vote Mikoto innocent/forgivable because Mikoto is technically not the one who did the crime. Milgram is judging Mikoto as the Prisoner and not “John”, so he wants to at least put Mikoto at ease by telling him that he is innocent/forgivable. He tells Es that he’s afraid that if Mikoto is voted Guilty again this time around, the “Original kind Mikoto” will soon disappear, and that “John” will have take over. But on the contrary, if we vote Mikoto innocent, then “John” promises that he will be the one disappear.

I feel extremely unwell about their dynamic 🧎‍♀️Mikoto and even “John” deserved better than this. Mikoto doesn’t even know “John” exist bro 😭

#milgram #mikoto kayano #im voting Mikoto innocent #but i do think John is guilty

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azuriizt · 9 months

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Hello all 8 Nahyuta enjoyers, the long awaited analysis is finally arriving at your doorstep. Lengthy post ahead and obvious spoilers to AA6.

(Using they/them as i personally headcanon them as nonbinary, just like the majority of the fandom at this time.)

When we first meet them, all we see is them reprimanding a rebel and then saving Maya from someone who had tried to attack her. We don't see much of their personality until we meet them on trial, and at the time they act very abrasive and borderlining violent, but this seems it's all the fandom ever sees when it comes to Nahyuta - they don't see what they were going through, the extent of their suffering, and choose to hate them solely because of how they acted. In this post, i plan to explain their motives and the aspect of their personality in an attempt to spread propaganda hopefully convince a few people to give them a chance.

Silence

The first hint we get to the true mess they are facing is Apollo saying they have changed, and this is soon confirmed further by Dhurke saying he can tell Nahyuta is suffering and needs help. Despite these characters being able to tell, the player only sees Nahyuta as a cold and emotionless person, and that is because that's how they HAVE to act in order to keep things from falling apart. Allow me to elaborate.

First of all, Nahyuta's wish was to fight for what was right and abolish the D.C. Act in order to stop all the unnecessary blood spill of innocent attorneys being sent to death along with their clients, and this passion was so strong that they studied for years despite the difficult situation they grew up in, with Dhurke having to raise them while on the run from the supporters of this same act. Nahyuta experienced first hand how this law destroyed lives, and sought to stop it; but why didn't they? Why did they act so hateful towards defense attorneys if they believed one would save them all? You might ask.

Because they didn't have a choice.

"Dhurke: I hear you've been serving Ga'ran - rather faithfully, in fact. Whatever happened to our dream of taking her down and changing this country?

Nahyuta: ......... The past is the past. [...] It's simple. People change. The Nahyuta you knew exists no more."

Their aunt, Ga'ran, took notice of their efforts and used the safety of their mother and younger sister as blackmail to cease this revolution. She was the queen, and there's no way they could've just said no and stuck to the Defiant Dragons only to risk having these innocent people suffer on their behalf, so they agreed to stand by her instead and quit fighting. This change is noted by a few characters, more impactfully their own father who, just as everyone else, knew they were going through something but had no idea of the severity of it.

Having been forced to be loyal to Ga'ran, they had to abandon everything they once were. Their dreams of changing everything were all but clouded now, left alone to decay, and their personality had to be shaped in such a way that they were all but a shell of the person they used to be - a cold and hostile exterior surrounding all their inner sorrow and struggle, and the sliver of hope that still remained, having to force the mindset that their personal feelings don't matter and that the only solution was to move on.

This hope was what kept them going. They believed Dhurke would be the one to bring glory back to Khura'in since they were unable to, and this belief was so strong that it pushed them through 5 painful years of being someone they didn't want to be, staining their hands with blood and dealing with all the crushing weight on their back so that their sister wouldn't be the one bleeding. Nahyuta was a traitor in the eyes of the Defiant Dragons since the reason for their sudden belief change was kept a secret. This group that raised them shamed them for this, except for one person; their dad, who could tell the distress they were in and was relentless to pull them away from that suffering.

He never once gave up on them, not even when they were to prosecute him and deal with the haunting chance that Dhurke would be sent to death by their doing just like many innocent lives before him - and despite this cruel action, Nahyuta's suffering only grew. This was the only person who truly believed in them at that rate, the one person they thought would save everyone -- and they were to find out he was going to die one way or another. Once Dhurke was arrested, they didn't confiscate their attorney's badge in hope that he was going to pull through this and be the brave hero they looked up to since they were a child, but that was all going to be in vain.

"Apollo: If he's found guilty, he probably won't even make it to his execution day.

[...]

Athena: I sensed a whirpool of emotions coming from within prosecutor Sahdmadhi just now. Anger, shock, bewilderment... And an icy sorrow, as deep and dark as an abyss."

Self-sacrifice

Nahyuta's story with self-sacrifice is very clear, although it all is only revealed in the final case of the game. Having their valiant efforts to make a difference cut short due to threats to their mother and sister, they had to turn their back on the revolution and face judgement from people who supported and as well those hated the queen, as from one side they were a traitor and the other they were a terrorist despite Dhurke's innocence, since those under the queen believed her judgement and there's the common thought that a father's sins shine through to his children.

Having faced all this cruelty from the people holding them accountable for their father's rumored crimes, they simply knew they couldn't let the truth about Rayfa's parents come through. She was just a child, and most of the population idolized her for being a royal and for her abilities of holding a Divination Seance, her entire image would be shattered if this came out to the world and this innocent child would have to face more pain than she already had to deal with given Ga'ran's less than stellar parenting skills.

"Rayfa: Nahyuta! Have you been keeping this secret all this time?! Have you been trying to protect me?!"

But then everything started to fall apart around them; Phoenix's investigation of Inga's headquarters prompted their little sister to confront the queen about her family, and she was told the truth. They tried to keep the cover over her eyes so that it wouldn't get out of hand once she asked them about it, but Rayfa already knew and the entire fantasy of being of a noble family was shattered - not to mention Apollo took it to defend Dhurke in court, which put him in immediate danger as he revealed himself as another one of his children and was standing for someone who was believed to be a criminal, which would be punishable by death if the defendant was found guilty.

Furthermore, Amara was revealed to have been disguising herself this entire time and was right under their nose instead of in some faraway corner of the kingdom like they were led to believe. They had to listen to their mother's testimony speaking ill of their dear father, as she too had been deceived by Ga'ran's lies, and then when she finally was able to see the truth she was shot on the spot, right in front of them so that they could do nothing but watch in fear their aunt would do worse if they tried to run to her aid, because they knew Ga'ran was capable of it. Something similar had happened beforehand as well, with Rayfa being degraded and humiliated by her own "mother" due to feeling ill when holding a Divination Seance and having to witness what at the time seemed to be her biological father brutally murdering her adopted one who, mind you, was the one who had a soft spot for her. They could do nothing but watch and make sure it wouldn't get worse because their feelings didn't matter, but other's safety did.

But it was the reveal that Dhurke had been dead for days that really broke them. Not only did they express significant distress and denial when on the stand, begging Apollo for an explanation, but they later confessed to Inga's murder and therefore put themselves in deathrow - afterall, what hope was there at that point? They had dealt with everything because they believed it would all get better one day, even if their smiles stopped being genuine along the way, and with Dhurke gone they thought there was no going back. No one would save them or people of Khura'in, and the truth about Rayfa had been revealed - that's why they stood up to protect the queen from suspicion and risk dying for it. There was no use for their efforts anymore, they thought, and all they could do was hope Ga'ran kept her word to keep Rayfa safe and make the kingdom prosper once they were gone.

"Nahyuta: Perhaps... I was waiting for him to save me. [...] Someday... He would come and free our family from the chains of the past. Perhaps, deep down... That is what i believed. I believed in Dhurke... Our father. However! ... It was but a dream. And now that dream has died. Murdered, along with Dhurke! So now, as the eldest, the responsibility falls squarely onto me... No matter the cost, i must protect her! Plase, try to understand, Apollo. Understand why i must bear all this sin."

Revolution

Turns out there was someone else who believed in Nahyuta, and that was able to save them from this suffering - their brother, Apollo. He was determined and pushed through their stubborn insistance to take the blame to finally reveal the truth to the world that queen Ga'ran was the true culprit and that she had been manipulating the people - including her own family - for her own gain, hiding tragedies she had committed under the cloak of lawful royalty. Of course, from personal experience, it's quite difficult to place the blame on someone while the abuse is going on, even if you feel so emotionally miserable during it, so it comes to no surprise to me that Nahyuta seemed genuinely distraught when this came to light.

"Nahyuta: Your Eminence, are you... Are you the one responsible for tearing my family apart? [...] Y-you concealed the truth, and used me for your own designs?!"

They were also wrong to think it was over with Dhurke's death as well, as he had left a piece of evidence that was necessary to reveal the whole truth about the queen. With Apollo's help and guidance, their father was able to save the people even from beyond the grave just how Nahyuta had thought he would, and this set them free from Ga'ran's web of lies and sparked the fire in them to fight back, joining Apollo's side to accuse and ultimately dethrone her.

With the queen gone, the rebels were cleared of the judgement they faced and Nahyuta was finally able to reunite with their mother, sister, and brother, although the relationship must've been a bit strained after such a long time apart from this type of familiarity... Except, they never got to explain to their father what it was that made them act so cruel, and regardless of the fact Dhurke never blamed them for it, they'll have to live with this in their conscience for a while more.

Of course, given the time Ga'ran ruled, it's only expected there will be people still supporting her; and maybe this fight will never end, but at least the war has dimished and Dhurke's spirit has been freed along with the people. Nahyuta has gone through a lot in those 5 years spent under Ga'ran, and obviously they won't immediately become a warm and welcoming person, not when this much trauma has gone unresolved for so long and only brought to light recently. They need time to heal and, unlike other tragic characters like Edgeworth and Simon, they haven't gotten much time to express their growth so far - not to mention that everyone's valiant attempt to believe in their innocence was pushed away by their duty, so support was not shown until the very end.

"Nahyuta: In all this time, not once did I reflect on my own conduct... for I had believed all was fate. Lost in my own sense of resignation, I was unable to wake up from my despair. But you, Apollo. You have awakened me with your demonstration of our father's creed. A dragon never yields."

#analysis #ace attorney #spirit of justice #ace attorney spirit of justice #aa6 #nahyuta sahdmadhi #you must be thinking #“wow that took so long OP must've done a lot of research”#nope i wrote this in like 3-4 hours skipping through playthroughs to get exact quotes #also expect more nahyuta posts #bc i've noticed a few things i'd love to point out #but they don't fit this post in particular

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archivalofsins · 7 months

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So, before I watch the short music video and analyze the hell out of it let me put up my thoughts on the thumbnail and the gifs. I haven't been in the best mood for a minute and have been physically sick as well. So, I've mostly been talking to friends in private about my thoughts on the information.

Good news for all of those reading discussion is how I flush out ideas and opinions. So, I now have a lot.

First the thumbnail,

We believe that the thumbnail is a direct progression of the first one and meant to mirror it. Better highlighting the nuances of the situation.

The window replacing the mirror behind him in the original thumbnail.

The mannequin parts take the place of the broken walls.

The train seats taking the place of the couch and support bars taking the place of the armrest, while being vaguely similar to the staff we see The Fool card carrying-

this continues that caged in or surrounded feeling from his first music video thumbnail. Making the audience contemplate whether he's stuck in here with us or if we're stuck in here with him. A feeling that both of his thumbnail images subtly give off well.

The mannequin is split into pieces but there only seems to be pieces enough for one. Something I and @doctorbunny discussed. At which point I brought up that the thumbnail can be taken as a visual reference to the line,

"Maybe it’s ok to try to keep on living split in half, make that heart beat."

As it visually shows, trying to live his life as normal by doing his commute with these, possibly disjointed/at odds aspects of himself, constantly at his side. Reminded him of the division within himself. A good illustration of how living with a dissociation can be in my opinion.

Mikoto's clothes here are different as well. I do believe this is the other one going to work, and we will be seeing the trauma that Mikoto suffered to lead him to this point. Just as we did with Amane. I also spoke briefly about enjoying how the series confirmed this hinted at concept all the way back from trial one.

We've also discussed dissociative identity disorder here in regards to the other characters before. The information from that post can be applied here in regards to Mikoto's new outfit. As we've gone over before alters can have different body language and speaking habits. However, in that post we went over the myths around switching being incredibly noticeable and how the changes are not as drastic as one would believe.

Now of course, the problem can be exacerbated by how much stress one is under. However, for the most part the point is not having people notice a change has occurred. So, alters try to mirror the one who fronts the most when out depending on who they're around or where they are. Of course, this is different for everyone.

However, a change of clothes isn't enough to really make someone go oh you've changed drastically anymore. Unless the change is really out there, which it's usually not. So, using clothes and accessories to give a better understanding of the other we haven't seen is a great stylistic choice.

However, this isn't the only differentiating feature. There are also eyebags. As we discussed in another post people with dissociative identity disorder tend to be lethargic or really tired.

However, just because people with dissociative identity disorder are tired and probably would rather not bother with getting in a verbal argument let alone go through the trouble of killing another person, they'll still defend themselves if necessary. Because dissociative disorders form as a response and defense to trauma. So, there's no saying what will happen when some is exposed to that trauma that caused it a second time.

Also, literally anyone is capable of committing murder even though no one should do it. The bags could be being used to differentiate between them throughout the second mv.

We can also see he has his bat in his hands here in the thumbnail. This is all important when it comes to discussing the gifs that have been released. Ah, almost forgot many have been saying that the thumbnail is a fisheye shot but we believe it to be an arc shot because Mikoto himself does not have the distortion that would come with a fisheye lens shot.

Here's some information on the arc shot.

In the gifs we see that instead of the diamond shaped earring Mikoto is wearing earrings that more so resemble tires. It would be cool if all the objects within the tarot cards were variations of things associated with each of them. Explaining why the deck was split in half near the end of MeMe.

As the tires are reminiscent to the wheel of fortune, and as such, could be being used to highlight how little control over their life the other had. Yet that's not the only interesting thing. Instead of wielding his bat like in the thumbnail, Mikoto is shown holding his tote bag with no bat in sight within the gif of him sitting on the train.

This implies that he won't only be stuck within the train in his mental space but displayed on it in reality. Something that goes into what we speculated about the train being related to trauma they may have experienced. I discussed this with @candckirby in private.

Where I posited that the space in MeMe was as destroyed as it was because Mikoto had a problem with enclosed spaces for one reason or another. Plus, the fact that his mental space may be taking on the form of this train could imply that he's been forced to relive that trauma in a way. In the gifs from today that I saw I noted that Mikoto's swing looked odd with them.

We both ended up agreeing it could be a one-handed far back wind up swing. Yet, I still had some doubts because the bat being used is clearly not Mikoto's at least not the one he uses in the thumbnail. As it seems to be drawn with rust on it and the one he has in the thumbnail is devoid of that. The bat could degrade over the course of the video though. Just from that and how the bat was angled behind him along with his posture it didn't seem as though he was swinging it in that way.

All in all, it's too short of an image to fully parse out. However, at first glance it appeared he was being attacked from behind while attacking forward. The gif where Mikoto is yelling out shows that they'll more than likely be using the lack of eyebags and presences of them to differentiate between them. Something I find interesting mostly due to the lack of them during most of MeMe and he very intentional covering of eyes in certain scenes during that mv.

Which leads me to believe that the other one was there, and the eyes were obscured for that purpose. Outside of that my favorite of the gifs was personally the chase scene. I really liked the expression work throughout all of them. Yeah, that's it.

It's not really a lot but I'm tired and sick so cut me a bit of slack- they said making late excuses for their weak delivery hours if not days after all this information dropped. Well at least we wrote something.

#milgram #mikoto kayano #gunsli rambles

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lanceeselhombre · 1 year

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An analysis of Xiao’s mental state

Okay so I’ve finally finished gathering all the info to make a coherent post about this. It took a hot minute but it was so worth it. The new trailer is a gold mine and it confirms some things that I’ve been thinking about for awhile now. Given the time of year, I think it’s time I pointed out something that’s so obvious, yet I have never seen a discussion about.

And that is Xiao’s (and his fellow yakshas) experiences with psychosis, and what it could mean for 3.4.

⚠️ DISCLAIMER ⚠️

I am not claiming that Hoyoverse intended to write Xiao with a mental illness and I am not diagnosing him with a condition. Psychosis is a symptom, not a condition in and of itself, and it can be caused by many different things, not just mental illness. I am also not going to be exploring a cause, simply pointing out that Xiao’s experiences as they have been shown to us so far (as of the ‘Endless Suffering’ teaser trailer) are an accurate depiction of psychosis.

That all being said, please proceed with caution. This post talks about and contains examples of delusions, auditory and visual hallucinations, disordered thoughts, and other features of psychosis, as well as character death. If these are triggers for you, please be careful.

Also, obviously there are spoilers ahead.

Discussion begins beneath the cut.

According to the DSM-5, psychosis is “defined by the presence of delusions, hallucinations, formal thought disorder (ie, disorganized speech), or abnormal psychomotor behavior (grossly disorganized or catatonic behavior), not better explained by another mental disorder, substance use disorder, or medical condition.” I realize that probably means a whole lot of nothing to most people, but don’t worry. Let’s take it one piece at a time.

Here, delusions do not refer to the in-universe devices made by the Fatui. Delusions, as a feature of psychosis, are false beliefs about reality that a person cannot be dissuaded of, even when the belief is undeniably proven to be false.

Let me give you a real life example. Imagine you have a friend over for dinner and you notice they haven’t touched their drink (let’s say it’s soda). You ask them what’s wrong. They say they refuse to drink the soda because the manufacturer is putting poison in it. You tell them that can’t be true because it would be on the news if it was true. You tell them that you have never gotten sick from this soda. You even drink a cup of it in front of them and nothing happens. Still, they insist it is poisoned.

This is an example of a common delusion. However, delusions come in many different forms.

Now, Xiao doesn’t immediately appear to have any delusions, admittedly. Even if he didn’t, that wouldn’t mean he isn’t experiencing psychosis; of the four features, only one needs to be present. That being said, I do want to point out one potential delusion:

His belief that his presence (or more specifically, his power) harms mortals.

I want to be clear that I am not talking about his backstory here. Xiao harmed mortals while enslaved to a previous god and I am not saying that didn’t happen, or that it was a result of a mental illness (because it wasn’t). What I am saying is he seems to believe that just existing around people can and will harm them, when what we see in game says the opposite. And no, I’m not just referring to vision holders, but normal people as well.

He claims that adeptal energy harms mortals. We see this several times in game. He says it when we first meet him.

And still seems to believe so during Perilous trial. (Otherwise Paimon wouldn’t be comforting him over the thought.)

Yet, we as the traveler, nor any other character he has interacted with on or off screen (that we know of) has fallen ill. Now for vision holders (aka playable characters) that can be explained away. For whatever reason, visions seem to increase a mortal’s tolerance to this energy.

So sure, if we assume his power really is dangerous, then ours, xiangling’s, and the Perilous trial gang’s lack of sickness from being around him doesn’t disprove this belief. But you know what does?

This NPC.

And all the visionless soldiers from the fight against Osial.

And everyone that passes Xiao in the harbor from the newest official video.

This isn’t even mentioning event content, like the time that we call for Xiao in the harbor to taste Xiangling’s cooking, or the in-game novels about the yakshas and adepti, which have only good things to say. You would think that one of those legends would tell of the horrors that follow the Vigilant Yaksha if such things were true.

But okay. Let’s say that none of these interactions were ‘long enough’ to cause the harm he believes will come to those around him. That still doesn’t explain why Yelan has a voice line about his presence aiding visionless mortals.

It doesn’t make sense that his presence could both have a comforting effect and a harmful one. And considering Yelan has an account of a person who had a (recurrent) positive experience from Xiao’s presence, and we have no accounts of a person who had a negative one, I’m inclined to believe Yelan. Yet, as far as we are made aware, he still believes enough contact, even with vision holders, will hurt them.

Remember, I’m talking about his power, his presence, not his karma.

See the parallel?

Let’s move on to the next feature.

Hallucinations are experiences of sensations that are not actually present. They can be heard, seen, felt, smelled, tasted, etc. Most people hallucinate from time to time, especially if they’re tired. Ever thought you heard someone call your name and they didn’t actually say anything? Pet owners, ever thought that you saw your pet walking in the corner of your eye, when they were sitting right next to you? Those are examples of hallucinations.

This feature is more obvious for Xiao. Starting with the most obvious, he experiences visual hallucinations, which were very clearly shown in the ‘Endless Suffering’ video.

Now before people brush this off as an artistic representation of his karma haunting him, may I remind you that there is literally a scene where the hallucination is shown through his eyes, and when he blinks it disappears, replaced by a little girl with a replica mask.

Notice how he sees the hallucination before looking to the little girl’s location. This shows that he was hallucinating beforehand, not mistaking what he saw for something else.

I believe the ‘other Xiao’ that he was shown to be fighting with earlier in the video to be something else. Due to the black aura coming off of him there, that seemed to be some sort of miasma or karmic manifestation. This makes sense, as he was fighting other monsters like hilichurls just beforehand. Regardless, the Xiao with the black aura and the greenish Xiao from the harbor were intentionally made distinct to show that they are not the same thing.

Similarly, he might also experience auditory hallucinations. I wasn’t able to catch something from the video that seemed to be this kind of hallucination, though Xiao does have a voice line about hearing voices.

This one is less concrete, as this is a fantasy world and the voices he hears could very well be really there. He tells us that he also hears the wishes of all those that wish on the lanterns at lantern rite. It could be an adeptus thing. So feel free to believe this one or not, but I wanted to put it out there.

Next is formal thought disorder. This feature refers to impaired ability to sustain and express coherent thoughts. Xiao does not seem to struggle with this at all, so I won’t dwell on it. Again, he doesn’t need to experience this to be experiencing psychosis, since we already established he is experiencing other features.

Abnormal psychomotor behavior looks at outward responsiveness to the environment. Both behavior that is unusually active (combativeness, restlessness, emotional agitation) and unusually absent (unresponsiveness) are possible manifestations of this feature.

Xiao is said to experience unprovoked bouts of anger and fear in the book ‘Yakshas: The Guardian Adepti’ just as his fallen comrades did as well. This book outright confirms that the other Yaksha all experienced psychotic episodes prior to their deaths and is both a great source of evidence for this topic as well as just a great lore read. The cutscene of Bosacius’s last moments is also a great example of psychosis. But I digress.

I was surprised to find that Xiao’s voice lines indicate he is pretty restless. Hoyo doesn’t repeat information unless it is important, and Xiao has not one (1), not two (2), but three (3) voice lines about his dislike for standing around or being idle.

Seems pretty restless to me.

Returning to the video once again, we can infer from the little girl’s dialogue that Xiao is at times unresponsive. If you want to watch again for yourself, the dialogue is from 2:22-2:39.

If you don’t, the scene is of the girl speaking to Xiao, but he doesn’t respond to her comments about her mask, or her asking if he is okay. Even when the girl calls to her grandfather to give Xiao some rice wine pudding, his only reaction is to close his eyes.

This is very unlike Xiao. From the Perilous trial quest, we know that he does not become withdrawn like this when tired, so exhaustion from fighting wouldn’t explain his behavior. He has never been shown to act like this, even around strangers. If he didn’t want to interact, he would simply teleport away. Except Venti’s later comment of the rice wine on his breath implies that he stayed. Therefore, this also seems to be evidence of abnormal behavior.

Everything I have discussed so far are positive symptoms, which cover abnormal experiences of psychosis. There can also be negative symptoms, or reduced experiences, that occur at the same time. These can be inability to show emotion, apathy, or withdrawing from social experiences, among other things. Presence of these symptoms starts to lean towards a specific condition, namely schizophrenia, but since they are relevant to Xiao’s behavior, I still want to mention them.

While Xiao openly admits to not understanding or experiencing human emotions, this is clearly an adeptus thing. Other full-blooded adepti such as Cloud Retainer share this experience, so I won’t consider it here. And while Xiao says he can’t understand human emotions, he seems to be able to sympathize, or at the very least treat others’ emotions with respect.

On the other hand, for what otherwise seems like an improvement, Xiao’s want to rest instead of stay with Venti concerns me. Firstly, because he has been shown to deny the need or want for rest every time it comes up in recent events. Secondly, because their dialogue indicates that late nights drinking on the roof are somewhat commonplace for them. Thirdly, because he was actively experiencing other psychotic features directly prior to the interaction, and him turning down Venti’s offer could be him starting to withdraw socially.

It should be noted that Xiao has already almost succumbed to his karma once, and the description of that event seems to suggest that he was deep into a psychotic episode at the time. This parallels the fates of his closest comrades, who all met their ends in this way. It is implied that his condition has since improved, though lantern rite is always a difficult time for him, and the trailer is letting us see for the first time what that really means.

Unfortunately, people who experience psychosis and psychotic disorders have poorer life expectancies than their peers. In game, psychosis has been shown to be a staple disorder of yaksha who are overwhelmed by their karma and will soon die. And right now is the time of year that it is all at its worst for the yaksha.

Death flags are waving for Xiao.

At the same time, his support system has grown larger than ever. Not only does he have Zhongli, but the traveler, Xiangling, Yelan, Yanfei, Itto, Shinobu, Qiqi, Baizhu, and Venti. Osial has been buried in the ocean once again and the earth rests. Burdens such as Bosacius’s unknown fate have been lifted off his shoulders, and he’s learned that maybe his siblings’ wishes for a mundane life aren’t out of reach after all.

With update 3.4 only a few days away, we’ll soon get to see what all this means for him going forward. Hoyoverse posted this video a few days before the update for a reason, and its contents show Xiao’s struggle in such a raw, new way for a reason. I can only assume we will see his current health addressed in some way, and while I will prepare for the worst, I will also hope for the best.

As an aside, I would like to take the time to applaud Hoyoverse for the effort they have put into making these depictions accurate. Psychosis is clearly an important topic when it comes to the yaksha and the effects of the bad karma they receive from their duty. I believe it is being used as a foreshadowing tool now, but despite being used for narrative, the disorder has been accurately and diversely represented amongst the yaksha (Bosacius’s cutscene vs Xiao’s teaser trailer), and most importantly, these characters remain fully fleshed-out people, not caricatures of mental illness.

Xiao is psychotic. He is also kind, loyal, and a strong warrior. He mentors others when they ask. He loves almond tofu and music. His dream is to dance among flowers, free from his duty as a yaksha. And despite Xiao’s past, of the violence he was forced to commit as a slave, and the danger that comes with battling alongside him, Hoyo makes a point to show that he has sworn to protect mortals and has never wished to harm anybody.

That is a distinction that is sorely underrepresented in media. Experiencers of psychosis are not inherently dangerous or violent, and of the two psychotic episodes they have depicted in detail, neither included violence toward people around the sufferer.

Once the second dropped, I couldn’t continue keeping this to myself, not when this gem of a detail has been going unnoticed by many. So once again, may I just say: well done, Hoyoverse. Well done.

Thanks for coming to my TedTalk. Happy Lantern Rite.

#tw psychosis #psychosis #tw delusion #tw mental illness #tw disordered thoughts #genshin xiao #genshin impact xiao #long post #genshin yakshas #genshin analysis #character analysis #character study #genshin 3.4 #genshin spoilers #other content

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psalmonesermons · 8 months

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Finding the will of God for your life Part 2/8

The need for relationship in finding God's will for your life

Finding God's will necessarily involves having a close relationship with God. This may seem obvious, but many people want to know God’s will without actually getting to know God himself. Human fathers instruct their children about what needs to be done because of their father/child relationship. God can only reveal his will to those who are close to him. Finding the will of God by its very nature means that we have to spend time with him. The bible is the primary source of revelation; prayer is the means with which we communicate with him. Trying to discover ‘God’s will’ without the bible or prayer would be a futile exercise since that would mean bypassing the two main forms of communication that God has given us.

Our attitude will influence our response to God’s directions. A pliable and willing heart is an essential ingredient in hearing God. Are we willing to do what God requires? Isaiah 45:9 says, “…Does the clay say to the potter, ‘What are you making?” We need to understand that God’s plan may include difficulty and hardship. God’s will for Paul was that “he must suffer for my name” (Acts 9:16).

When people want to know God’s will they are very often looking for assurance rather than instruction; what they want is to be assured that everything will go as they plan - without difficulty or trial!

1 Pet. 3:17 It is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good, than for doing evil.

Many Christians are preoccupied with their own personal fulfilment. If this is the case, it will seriously restrict our ability to receive God’s instruction for our lives. God’s plan for our lives may well include a path that we did not expect. It is essential that our intent is to obey, not to evaluate.

Some people believe that they have heard from God by the very fact that he confirmed what they knew already! Others desperately want something so much that they convince themselves that that is what God wants for their lives. There are difficulties with both scenarios. Often people have already convinced themselves even before God has actually spoken. They give the impression that they are really only interested in hearing from God if ‘he agrees with them’. We need to be vigilant in making sure that we are not merely listening to our own desires. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.

James 1:4 but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed.

We are often the worst judges of our own intention; that is why we need to make sure that we are seeking godly advice and that we are willing to lay down our plans.

James 4:13-14 Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.

Amen

Personal Prayer

In Part 3 we consider how to deal with the various hindrances to finding God's will for your life

#christianity #bible study #bibletruth #blog post #blessings #psalmonesermons #faith #victory #finding God's will 2/8

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kaylaclay · 9 months

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My name is Kayla Clay. I am a 32-year-old single mom and entrepreneur from Illinois. I joined Tumblr back in 2015, but this happens to be my first post. I had my child six years ago, and when she was two, I had a fallout with my husband. I literally raised my daughter alone, because her dad avoided child support by traveling out of the country. To make matters worse, my mom, who was my only support, died of COVID two years ago. I was extremely devastated, as my mom was the only person I had to lean on. After my mom's death, I fell into deep depression. I had the greatest anxiety and depression I had ever experienced. I suffered from anxiety and depression for six good months before going to see my psychiatrist. He prescribed some meds for me because my anxiety was high. I had nightmares, always forgot things, and was always scared. It was very crippling. The funny thing was that these meds prescribed for me didn't seem to work. I used these meds for a year and three months, but I was never getting better. Now fast forward to two months ago; I was going through a website when an ad popped up. I thought it was just a regular ad, but this ad was talking about psychedelics. I was eager to know what psychedelics were because I had heard a friend talk about them. I researched psychedelics and found out that they had some effects on anxiety, depression, ADHD, PTSD, autism, and insomnia. I also found out that the usage of these psychedelics needed to be controlled. I also saw that they were illegal in my country, but the fact that they worked was what made me click the ad. The ad then redirected me to an Instagram account; Mycoepics was the account name. I followed the account and decided to ask questions. I was told that due to the restrictions in my country, I could only get them shipped to me discreetly. I asked about the dosages and was told I would have to microdose. The psychedelics I was referred to were magic shrooms. I decided to take the risk of ordering them, knowing well that they were restricted in my country and that I could be scammed as well. After about four days, I received the shrooms. I started using them following the guide Mycoepics had given me. The very first trial was rough as I hallucinated. After about thirty minutes, the hallucinations stopped. I felt relaxed for the first time in years. I went on and continued using them and saw remarkable changes. I went ahead and asked my psychiatrist if I could continue to use shrooms instead of the regular meds. To my greatest surprise, he agreed. I went ahead and ordered more from mycoepics on Instagram and continued to use them. After about three weeks, I felt and knew that my anxiety and depression had disappeared. I went on to ask Mycoepics if I could withdraw since I was healed. He said yes, that there were no issues with withdrawal. I stopped using the shrooms and there were zero side effects from withdrawal. I had to go to my psychiatrist to confirm if I had been healed completely; his reply was positive. It was then that I realized that the cure was there all along but we didn't seem to see it. I have never felt better since I broke free completely from the shackles of anxiety and depression. Now I work normally and am currently giving my daughter the life she deserves. I am sharing my story so someone going through what I went through can see it and be inspired and make the right choice.

#anxiety #depression #shroooms #adhd #ptsd #psychedelique

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mianmimi · 1 year

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It seems the fanon is that 838 Strordo were a happily married couple for years, and it is also a favorite of mine, but I am digging this idea of 838 Strordo not being a thing until Stephen comes back and is revealed to have been secretly alive all along. His impossible journey across dimensions eventually made him realize that 838 Mordo was the one. When Mordo opens the door and welcomes the "brother" he loved in secret, he is greeted with a kiss and reciprocation and they live happily 5ever🌈✨

Dear Nonny I’m absolutely smitten by this idea 🥰

I’m all for new flavors of love stories, and your take with this one is so bittersweet. I imagine that Mordo also had his love interests while Stephen was off chasing Christine and whoever else he fancied at the time. The idea of them initially not being really involved in each other’s lives is appealing too. Like they started off very professional, just study and work and they go their separate ways before starting all over again. Then with time they get closer, open up more, invest in each other’s trials and triumphs. Until one day while they’re talking by the fireplace and Mordo looks at Stephen he realizes….fuck….I might be a little in love with this man. But Stephen’s going on about his romantic exploits and Mordo’s heart sinks, knowing that it’s not worth gambling their friendship over.

This would be an excellent idea for slow burn now that my gears are really turning. Like Mordo loving Stephen and supporting him even though it hurts. And Stephen probably asks why Mordo’s not seeing anyone anymore. And Mordo just replies that he’s giving his heart a rest. Stephen doesn’t overtly pry but he is more observant after that. There’s a nagging feeling in his brain that Mordo might be in love with someone he can’t be with. What if one day he asks Mordo to confirm that? Like are you turning down dates because you’re in love with someone that can’t reciprocate? And Mordo just gives him this sad look and tells him that the concern is appreciated but it’s inappropriate. They’re student and teacher after all. Stephen’s left to think where this sudden distance came from cause he thought they’d gone beyond that strict teacher student boundary. And I bet that he truly does know that it’s him, but that he’d be in denial about it. Because why would Mordo be suffering in silence over someone like him? Mordo can have anyone, Stephen included, if he only asked. So why isn’t he? Stephen just thinks about it probably to the point of misinterpreting things again.

And then of course the incursion and his execution/banishment happens. Oh sweet Nonny, the idea of Stephen’s mind being filled with the image of Mordo’s face right when he thought he was being obliterated is 😭😭😭😭 Omg and then when he travels through different worlds and dimensions just to get back home 🥺 And he realizes….fuck fuck fuck I fucking blew it. I loved him and he loved me. But I left him lonely under blossom trees 😭😭😭

I’m also thinking of him encountering different characters along the way and he shares his story with them, and keeps bringing up how he needs to get home to someone he loves. And oh man can you imagine the crazy shit he’d have to get through? All the adventures and scary fuckery? Just to see Mordo again? 😭😭😭 Like damn I fucked up. I didn’t realize it then. And I didn’t fight for him. But I sure as hell am fighting now! I’ll get home to him again 🏃‍♂️

And I’m sure he’s scared of what he’ll find if he ever does get home. How much time has passed? Has Mordo moved on? Does Mordo hate him? What if the Illuminati also killed him for his loyalty towards Stephen? And the idea of Mordo being in danger just propels poor Stephen onward home.

Then of course he arrives with a simple knock at the door. It opens and Mordo’s there, with a little cut on his head (nod to the MoM fight.) Mordo’s looking at him absolutely speechless while Stephen cups his face and smiles before they both go in for that 😘

#doctor strange #stephen strange #karl mordo #strordo #ask and answer #thank you nonny #stephen strange/karl mordo #otp feels #earth 838 #supreme strange/karl mordo #supreme stephen/master mordo #supreme strange/baron mordo #baron mordo

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amor-immortalem · 3 years

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Everything Undesired chapter 4

Chapter 3

Warning: mention of torture? Light victim blaming, Lucifer, Satan, and Beel commit murder.

“I see,” Diavolo had a contemplative look on his face. The demon lord, often seen with a jovial, bright smile plastered upon his face, now had replaced it with a more serious look as Lucifer explained just what had happened to his brother. “And you’re positive this is what happened to Mammon?”

“Asmo is certain enough that he would stake his title as Avatar of Lust on it.” Satan spoke up.

“I see, if that’s the case then I will permit you up to the human world to pay these women a visit. Make sure they suffer, all three of you.” The warmth in his voice, his eyes, now replaced with a cold tone and a wrathful look, absolutely enraged that a demon not just under his rule, but in his cabinet no less had been assaulted in this manner. He may have failed in protecting the Avatar of Greed from this but he would see to it that a crime this grave never happened again to one of his subjects. “I’d would go in your stead to deal with them myself, but I will stay behind and work to pass legislation to ban the making of pacts freely. This will not happen again; I swear it on my life and my throne.”

And with Diavolo’s permission the three Avatars were off, out for blood for the travesty that befell their brother. Once they were gone, Diavolo turned to his butler.

“Barbatos, did you foresee this at all? Was there not anything we could have done differently to prevent this?” For as angry as he is, the demon lord feels a certain sense of guilt for what happened to the white-haired demon. What kind of ruler cannot protect one of his subjects from something so heinous?

“In another reality, yes.” He nodded, “But never in this one specifically, my Lord.”

“What happens next?”

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The three Avatars stand outside the residence of the witches. Lucifer is the first to step forward, demon form manifesting from the wrath coursing through his being. The aura he emits is suffocating to all around him. A knock on the door is all the courtesy he plans to give them tonight.

When the door opens, there is a collective gasp.

“L-Lord Lucifer,” One of the sisters steps back as the three demons barge their way inside the building. “To what do we owe the honor of this visit from not only you, but your younger brothers as well?”

“Do not. DO NOT ACT AS IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’VE DONE TO OUR BROTHER!” Satan roars, his demon for making its appearance. He’s ready to go on the attack however it’s Lucifer that stops him with a simple wave of the hand.

“We know everything you’ve done.” The eldest’s voice is cold, gaze calculated. “You’ve not only laid a hand on one of my brothers, but my favorite one at that. That in and of itself is enough to warrant your deaths, but to cause him such suffering will ensure they are not quick.

With another wave of his hand, the Avatar of Pride bound the three women before letting his brothers have a go at the other two. The eldest was his.

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Asmo took a step into his brother’s room and was devastated to see the look on his brother’s face. He looked so broken; his cheeks soaked with tears as Asmo heard Arella speaking.

“You don’t have to do it if you’re not strong enough for it. I’m sure there are alternatives we could find if you can’t. Just remember, you’re not alone in this. We all will help you if you decide to go through with this.”

The demon’s curiosity was piqued. Just what we’re they talking about?

“’Rella, I can’t ask that of any of you. This is my punishment for bein’ so powerless.”

Asmodeus cleared his throat to gain her their attention.

“What are you two talking about? Did something else happen?”

Arella only picked up the phone and handed it to him. What he saw was enough to pull a gasp from the demon. It made him sick.

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As soon as it had begun, the torture was over. None of the three brothers had even broken a sweat at this point. The witches hadn’t even lasted that long. Blood and viscera coat the floor, bones stick out from odd places, one has pieces missing from her body here and there- bite marks and missing flesh, even a missing arm- all courtesy of the Avatar of Gluttony.

“Beel, are you hungry or has anger tided your hunger?”

“I'm famished,” The Avatar of Gluttony confirmed.

“Go ahead and dispose of their bodies then. Make sure no trace of them remains.” The Avatar of Pride nods to his younger brother.

It was then that they heard it- the screaming cry of a frightened baby. The sound was easy to miss over the shrieking and wailing- the pleas for mercy that would never come. One by one, their heads turned to the sound just upstairs as they all came to terms with the fact that a child had been born from this travesty.

Satan was the first to move as he climbed the stairs. Just off to the right was a tiny nursery and lying in the crib, he found the child. All of his instincts were screaming at him to do away with the infant. He almost did had it not been for Lucifer’s hand placed on his shoulder. They were soon joined by Beel as all three of them peered down at the tiny child below them.

“What do we do?” Beel asked.

“Do we take them with us? Or do we leave them to the proverbial wolves?”

Both brothers looked to the eldest, demanding an answer. For the first time, the Avatar of Pride doesn’t have the answer. Does he take the life of an innocent child or does he subject his brother to a lifetime of suffering? It's an impossible decision to make where either party ultimately loses in the end.

Lucifer reaches down and takes the infant into his arms, a pained look on his face as he scrutinizes the infant’s appearance. Suddenly, he’s flashing back to his time as an angel, back to the first time he ever held Mammon in his arms. The child is an exact carbon copy of their father, no apparent features from his mother or her sisters, this was the best case scenario, but the little one looks sickly- likely due to the lack of demonic influence that would have been received from their father had he been present during the pregnancy.

Finally, after remaining silent for what felt like eternity Lucifer spoke up. “The child doesn’t look long from this world. We’ll wait for morning. If they survive the night, we’ll take them with us- let Mammon decide what to do with them.”

The other two nodded as Beel went back downstairs to finish the meal he had started.

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“You don’t have to take him, Mammon.” Asmo kept staring at the photo on his brother’s D.D.D. as he spoke.

“He has no one else, Asmo,” The white-haired demon frowns. “I can’t just leave him to die and it’s not like I can just give ‘im away either. As much as I hate it, he’s the heir to everything I am- the next Avatar of Greed, the next ruler of the fourth layer. It’ll be hard at first, but I’ll force myself to look past what happened to me. This isn’t his fault, so why punish him for the crimes of his mother and her sisters? He’s innocent in all this.”

“Even now,” the Avatar of Lust chuckled sadly, “after all these years, you still have the heart of an angel, don’t you? You aren’t thinking about what this will do to you, are you? He’ll be a constant reminder of your trauma. Is that really fair to you?”

“It isn't, but when has life ever been fair? If life was fair, we wouldn’t ’ve lost Lilith- wouldn't ‘ve fallen from the Celestial Realm.” He wiped at his eyes.

“No. It’s not, but I still think this is a bad idea for you. None of us will stop you if this is what you want to do but you shouldn’t do it just out a sense of obligation.” Asmo placed a hand on his brother’s shoulder. “You should only keep him if you want to.”

At the look of resignation on Mammon’s face, Arella placed a hand on his back. “We’re here if you need us. If it gets to be too much, I can help care for him, okay?” She echoes the words she had said previously.

“Babe, you don’t-”

“I know I don’t, but I want to.” She smiled softly. “We’re in this together. All of us.” She looked to the strawberry blonde demon as he nodded in agreement.

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Satan sat in the rocking chair next to the crib while Lucifer was on the phone notifying Diavolo of the situation as well as speaking to Arella in regards to the baby. He studied his nephew, wondering just what might happen to the little boy. Over the hours since finding him here, the tiny half-demon seemed to be getting stronger- likely from just being in the presence of his brothers and him. It was apparent that the child would be coming with them. He wondered what his brother’s reaction would be to the infant. Demons were known to kill unwanted offspring out of panic.

It was the circle of life, the blonde supposed. Not what the child deserved, but if it led to that, there was really nothing anyone could do. He was drawn from his thoughts as quiet chirps sounded from the boy. He watched as the infant brought his little hand to his mouth and he started squirming in the mass of blankets he was swaddled in.

The Avatar of Wrath looked around for a bottle or really anything that could be a source of nourishment. Of course, the newborn would get hungry eventually- that's essentially all babies at this age, eat and sleep. The demon finally finds a mini fridge on the wall opposite the crib, right next to the changing table. He had never fed a baby before but he would be willing to try as long as it kept the boy satisfied and kept him from crying. A trial by fire as they say.

Rocking the infant carefully, he slowly got up and retrieved a bottle from the fridge. It was a lot smaller than he thought an infant should take but it was good enough for the time being. Thankfully there was a bottle warmer placed on a nightstand near the crib. He placed it inside, setting the temperature at that of a human’s normal body temperature. When the milk was sufficiently heated, he gave it to the child who then suckled it down rather quickly,

“Hey now, there’s no need to suck it down so fast. You'll choke if you’re not careful.”

Lucifer had rejoined at him at this point. The scene of his brother trying so hard to feed the baby almost made him chuckle. “I can take him, if you’d like, Satan.”

“Please, I really don’t know how to do this.” He pulled the bottle away so he could transfer the child to his older brother.

“It won’t be long until the dawn. Gather up some of his things as we’ll be taking him with us. I just got off the phone with Arella. She told me Mammon plans on keeping the him.” Lucifer only sighed, wondering if the Avatar of Greed was only doing this out of a sense of obligation and responsibility.

Green to yellow gradient eyes widen in surprise at the statement. “He’s planning on keeping him? I figured he wouldn’t want anything to do with the baby.”

“As did I but, for all of our brother’s flaws, he’s still genuinely a good person. I don’t think he can really leave behind someone who needs him- especially an innocent child.” Lucifer looks down at the child who has now finished the bottle. “Hand me a rag.”

“Why?”

“Well, I would prefer not to be spat up on and now that he’s finished eating, he needs to be burped.” The eldest moved the infant to rest against his shoulder as Satan handed him the nearest rag he could find. “Babies aren’t capable of burping on their own. Now, go gather his things. I’ll tend to him for the time being."

Masterlist 2

#dead dove do not eat #tw: torture but not described #tw: victim blaming #lucifer and co commit murder #obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me swd #obey me! shall we date?#obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me beelzebub #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #mammon angst #obey me oc #arella

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a-study-in-crime · 3 years

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The Murder of Catrine da Costa: Was She Dismembered In Front of A Child?

The murder

The murder of Catrine da Costa in 1984 has become one of the most famous murder cases in Sweden. Catrine, who was 27-years-old at the time of her death, was a drug addict and prostitute. She was constantly searching for men willing to pay for her services to afford her addiction. Catrine was also homeless and was staying with customers and friends to keep warm for the night. She was well-known in Stockholm, and she was often seen standing on Malmskillnadsgatan, which was an infamous street where prostitutes looked for their customers.

The last person that ever saw Catrine alive observed her on 10 June 1984. Over a month later, a man discovered several plastic bags under a bridge that smelled terribly. He contacted the police, and body parts were found in the bags. They contained the legs and the lower part of a torso of a female. The police tried to identify the woman, but it was a hard task since they had no hands and therefore no fingerprints. However, other plastic bags were found a couple of weeks later. They contained both arms of a female, and the police could identify the woman as Catrine da Costa with her fingerprints. With the victim identified, two more questions had to be answered; who killed Catrine, and why?

The investigation

In December 1984, the police found a suspect; it was a man named Teet Härm who was working as a pathologist. However, he was released after just five days in custody because of a lack of evidence, but he was still considered a person of interest.

This might seem like a completely irrelevant happening, but it would turn out to be one of the most important parts of the murder investigation. A mother of a 17-month-old girl suspected that the father, a man named Thomas Allegén who was working as a doctor, to her child had molested the 17-month-old. The mother had the child examined four times by doctors, but they found no sign of molestation. However, the mother was convinced that Thomas was guilty since their daughter’s genitals were red and sore, and red bumps could be seen on her buttocks. The doctors determined that the child had simply rubbed her genitals at objects which caused the irritation. It is also common for children to have red bumps on their skin because of diapers. 1 and a half years later, the daughter was sitting in her mother’s lap while the mother read a newspaper. The paper showed pictures of murder victims whose murders had not been solved, and one picture was of Catrine da Costa. Suddenly, the child pointed at the picture and said: “Look! It’s her”. This was the start of a horrific story of a child witnessing a person being dismembered.

The daughter told her mother that she had seen her father and a man she called Tomt saw a lady into pieces. She stated that “the lady was whole, and then she was broken”. The child also stated that Thomas and Tomt had hit the lady in the head, drilled into her body, and consumed some of the body parts. She described the room where it had happened as white. The mother contacted the police, who took the lead seriously, and they soon had a new theory: Teet and Thomas had killed and dismembered Catrine in front of Thomas’ daughter, and the dismemberment had occurred at the hospital where they both worked.

The daughter was taken to a room where autopsies were made to see if she recognized the surroundings. However, she showed no signs of being afraid or recognizing the room. Despite this, two child psychologists concluded that the child might be afraid to show that she had been there before because of the extreme trauma of witnessing her father dismember a woman.

The media quickly picked up the story, and Teet and Thomas became famous as “the pathologist and the doctor” in the papers. The gory details of the supposed dismemberment made the story a success, and it was written about almost daily. A couple read about the case in a newspaper and quickly contacted the police. They believed that they could provide information to help with the investigation. The couple worked with developing pictures, and they had had a customer in 1984 who introduced himself as a doctor. He said that he was working on a murder case with the police and had to develop pictures of an autopsy, and asked the couple to not tell anyone about it. They developed the pictures and gave them to the customer and never told anyone. Now they believed that the pictures might have been of Catrine and that their customer was Thomas. They were brought to the police station to try and identify the customer in a line-up. The couple failed to identify Thomas as the customer several times but finally managed to identify him.

Both Thomas and Teet denied killing and dismembering Catrine. Thomas also stated that he had never molested his daughter.

The trial

Despite the “evidence” pointing toward Teet and Thomas being guilty of murder were only indications, both of them stood trial in 1987. The prosecutor had Thomas’ daughter as his main witness as well as the couple. He also stated that the daughter’s name for her father’s accomplice, Tomt, resembled Teet’s name. This indicated that Teet was the accomplice. He also informed the court that Teet’s first wife had committed suicide in 1982 by hanging, but that Teet had not shown any signs of being upset about it. In fact, he had acted indifferent to the fact that his wife was dead. Furthermore, a pathologist had concluded that the dismemberment of Catrine had been carried out by someone with general or even full knowledge about human anatomy.

The attorney claimed that the child was not a reliable witness. Firstly, a child that young could not possibly remember anything at all from that time period, and a child could definitely not tell a detailed story about it 1 and a half years later. The attorney also stated that the couple was also unreliable witnesses since they could not identify Thomas as their customer in a line-up. Regarding the daughter’s name for her father’s accomplice, the attorney presented a children’s book about gnomes that had been read to the child. The word for gnomes in Sweden is “tomte”, which is of course very similar to “Tomt”. According to him, saws were a part of the story. He claimed that the daughter had been inspired by the book when telling her story. Furthermore, the attorney stated that Teet’s reaction to his wife’s suicide was irrelevant and that her suicide had been investigated several times and it had been deemed a suicide all times. The wife had also suffered from mental illness and had tried to kill herself before.

Thomas and Teet were found guilty of the murder and dismemberment of Catrine. However, the trial was declared invalid since the jury had talked to the press about their views on Thomas and Teet before sentencing. This meant that the trial had to be done all over again with a new judge and a new jury. This time, Thomas and Teet were found not guilty of murder. However, it was stated that they had, without a doubt, dismembered Catrine, but they could not be punished since the crime had been prescribed. Thomas was found not guilty of molesting his daughter.

Other suspects

The investigators have received massive criticism; they were so focused on Thomas and Teet being the killers that they ignored evidence suggesting that someone else had committed the murder. For example, the last person that had seen Catrine alive was one of her customers. He had stated that he had dropped off Catrine on 10 June after spending a couple of hours with her, but no one could confirm his story. This meant that he could have killed Catrine, perhaps accidentally or in a fit of rage, and simply made up his statement to the police. The investigators also failed to DNA-test a person of interest that had previously been convicted of killing and dismembering a woman. There have been several other suspects over the years, but no one has been convicted of the murder.

Aftermath

The murder of Catrine da Costa remains unsolved. Her head, genitals, one breast, and her intestines were never found. It has been widely discussed if Catrine was even murdered since a cause of death could not be determined; she could perhaps have died of an overdose or something else, and “only” been dismembered. The death and dismemberment of Catrine da Costa remain a mystery.

Thomas and Teet wrote and published an argumentative text in a Swedish newspaper in 2011. They wrote the following (my translation from Swedish to English): “Our lawsuit against the state resulted in a verdict where the district court found that 27 mistakes had been made in the earlier legal processes. We have a verdict showing that we were not giving a fair trial, but we have despite this not been granted damages”.

#tcc #true crime #true crime community #tc original #true crime original #tcc blog #crime #murder #my post #criminology #criminal

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slashedthroughtheheart · 3 years

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Waiting for the right one

It had been 3 months since you first arrived in this place. You’d tried your hand at learning how to be a proper survivor at first before you’d truly known how the place operated. Before you knew that the survivors could leave the campfire.

You’d seen Nea sneak off when no one was looking. You’d been fairly quiet, trying to figure out where exactly you’d end up in this social hierarchy. Your nose wrinkled whenever one of these useless alpha’s tried to get closer to you while asking their invasive questions.

It was no secret that heats and ruts still happened. There was only a few omegas in the entity’s realm, and almost all of them were survivors. There was that one girl that ran with Legion that smelled vaguely like an omega, but there was talk that maybe she was a rare ometa. A hybrid of beta and omega. Granted, no one could get close, the other 3 Legion members always nearby and quickly closed ranks whenever anyone, killer or survivor alike, got too close for comfort.

They were a tight knit pack, it seemed.

When you’d arrived, you had expected a few of the girls to be omegas because of their size. You’d thought for sure the girl who introduced herself as Feng Min was going to be an omega, but only the pleasant scent of a beta washed over you when she came close to pat your shoulder after you appeared in the fog close to the campfire.

Over those first few hours, you found out that out of all the survivors, there was only 3 other omegas besides you. Nea was one, but her thinness had made you think beta at first. But you guessed she had a hard life before coming here, and being here was also hard, so there was no time to build up the softness that you’d always associated with omegas.

The one girl you’d been so sure would be an omega, Jane, had surprised you by being an alpha. She wore a smart, but slightly dirty, business suit. She looked very chic and savvy, and her hips and chest had made you think she was for sure going to be an omega. But you should have known better when she almost swaggered over to you with Feng Min to introduce herself, and then you to the rest of the people around the campfire.

You took a quick headcount, seeing how many people you were now lost with. You came up with 21 besides you, and figured that was that. So when you’d been halfway through the name introductions, with Feng sticking to one side of you, releasing calming beta pheromones to help ease your discomfort at not knowing where you’d been taken to, you were surprised when 4 more people walked out of the fog.

“Ah, and here’s our fearless leader! Dwight, we’ve got a new girl! An omega too! Careful, or she might just take yer spot.” Ace, a rather boisterous but slimy alpha smacked the one man who’d returned with the group of girls.

He had glasses, and kinda short dark hair. He seemed to be in office attire, and he screamed nervous omega as he wrung his hands in front of himself as Ace manhandled him over to where you stood.

Your suspicions were confirmed when the overwhelming scent of anxious omega wafted in the air. He’d managed to not stutter when he said a polite hello while rubbing the back of his neck, eyes not making it all the way to you, instead staring off to the side by your shoulder.

You’d simply nodded, unsure of what was going on, or why an omega was the ‘leader’ of this.. pack? You’d tried to listen to that first 5 minute explanation from a fast talking Feng, telling you they were all survivors and that they went into trials against killers and had to escape over and over again. You really did. You didn’t understand what they meant. Why were they just sitting around a campfire instead of trying to escape if there were killers loose?

You’d always been a bit different for an omega, making it later in life and only ever taking beta friends as help during your heats, never mating to an alpha. None of them ever managed to impress you, and you only agreed to the help from your beta friends because they promised not to catch feelings or try to push you into anything. They knew you wanted an alpha, and they knew how picky you were. They just didn’t like you suffering for so long through your heats with no relief in sight.

You were grateful to them, truly. It was treated as a necessary biological function by you, one that was annoying as hell when you just couldn’t find the right alpha for yourself.

Plenty had tried, coming into your personal space just oozing horny pheromones and trying to sway you that way. And the response was always the same. A very rankled omega telling them to piss off before they got authorities involved.

And no matter how interested an alpha was, the sheer lack of omegas in more recent decades gave them a lot more protection. If an omega didn’t want an alpha’s advances, the authorities as well as majority populace would stand behind the omega.

And just one time was all it took. One time an alpha kept pushing after you’d refused him.

He’d smelled almost sour to you from the get go. Skeevy through and through. He’d gone so far as to try and box you in against the wall closest to you, arm going up above your head as he leaned down to leer at you, grin lascivious as he eyed you.

Your friends had insisted on the defense lessons, knowing you were so picky about alphas and that some were just too dense for your own good.

Something in you snapped.

Red overtook you. Fury at the audacity of this alpha overstepping his bounds. Rage that no alpha had approached you properly. Shown you they were good enough to be your alpha. Shown you they could take care of you properly. None were strong enough, in command enough, sure enough of themselves without having to throw their scent around. It wasn’t them that was their strength. They always relied on their scent alone. None walked like it was them before their scent that held the power.

He wasn’t good enough, and he wasn’t taking the no gracefully.

You shook, hands balling into fists while the white hot fury spread from your breastbone out to every extremity. Every pore of your body filled with your indignity at your treatment. At the incompetence of all the alphas you’d ever met.

You almost blacked out during the interaction, but instead you almost watched yourself go through the encounter as if in a trance and looking back on a memory.

The crunch of his nose had been satisfying. His cry of pain fueled you, pushed you forward and let you know that you could do this. You were stronger than he thought. Smarter. More determined.

He choked with the hit to his throat, staggering away from you and almost falling to the side, trying to get away from your rain of fury.

When you had taken the first step to follow him, to take out your rage of years of mediocre alphas trying to posture you into things you didn’t want, the fog had rolled in out of nowhere. It had come from behind, billowing forward around your legs and going up to engulf all of you as you took your second step, so focused on getting to the prone alpha scrambling away from you in fear that you didn’t notice until the fog reached your shoulders.

And in your trance, you didn’t panic when the fog fully swallowed you up.

The cloying darkness seemed to last for so long, long enough that your anger dissipated and you were left confused and slightly anxious as the world seemed to stop existing, and you were lost to this void of roiling blackness. It was so dark, but there still seemed to be movement like smoke moving lazily about.

You couldn’t tell when or if you blinked or closed your eyes. All senses were shockingly both over and under stimulated. The silence deafening. The only scent your own slow rising panic stinging your nose. Your hands reached out, you think, but you could not see them. You could not feel anything unless you tried to grab yourself. And even then, it felt muted, like you were dreaming but not.

We’re you walking somewhere? You think you were telling your legs to move, but without being able to see, and feeling so weightless, you couldn’t be sure.

It felt like both a lot and no time at all had passed when you suddenly felt solid ground under your feet.

You wobbled a bit, disoriented by the sudden information reaching your brain. You couldn’t see even when your feet were touching ground. You held your hands out, trying to find anything, and jumped a little when your hand connected with something hard and rough. It scraped at your hand, causing you to grunt at the small discomfort.

You realized your hearing was back. You hadn’t been able to even hear your own breathing, and you swore you called out while in that darkness that had clung to every part of you just earlier.

You hadn’t realized your eyes were closed at first, shut tight against the darkness you had been afraid of.

“Hey! There’s a girl!” a higher feminine voice startled you into opening your eyes. People, you weren’t alone anymore. Maybe they could help you.

You were slightly dizzy from the transition of not being able to see even when your eyes were open, floating in the abyss that had seemed to douse all your senses.

What you had scraped your hand on was a thick tree trunk off to your left just a bit, visible to you despite the gloom pressing from all around. Compared to what you just experienced, it was bright out.

And that’s how you came to the entity’s realm. Confused and scared after finally snapping and attacking an alpha that tried to put his hands on you.

You’d been pulled towards the campfire, sat on a log between the soothing beta Feng and the other omega besides Dwight that had come from the fog. Her name was Cheryl and she did her best to help Feng try to calm your rattled nerves.

Everyone at least sympathized with you on being scared after first coming out of the fog. For some, that meant they tried to calm you down like the two had been by your side around the campfire. For others, the nicety ran out at giving you space your first day of being there.

Ace had been the first to try to proposition you, saying in such a weaselly way that you smelled mighty fine and the two of you would make quite the pair.

Your immediate refusal and disgusted face had been the turning point in his attitude towards you. While he wasn’t outwardly hostile towards you, you found yourself having to rely on the other 2 survivors to unhook you if you were caught when you went into trials with him.

He went to acting like you didn’t even exist around the fire whenever the both of you weren’t in trial. Everyone pretended not to notice, and some of the more gentle survivors would offer you a wincing smile whenever you were paired with him in trials.

After that first encounter with him, the others noted you withdrew in on yourself a lot, not even wanting Feng or Cheryl to offer their comfort or presence to you.

You’d retreated from the logs after the first trial that Ace had left you to die on hook after you’d been caught unaware by a silent man with a white mask. You were told after regenerating near the campfire that the killer you’d faced was known as the Shape, but everyone referred to him as Michael Myers, or in David’s case ‘Big silent bastard’.

And while David had never tried to approach you, you knew without a doubt he was an alpha that’s power came from his scent and not himself, despite professing a brawling background. Sure, someone could be a fighter. But did they have power all their own? David did not. None of the alphas present did, in your opinion.

And the slow understanding you gained of your situation opened your eyes to the survivor alphas being absolutely weak and pathetic in your eyes. They’d given in to being a pawn, a plaything for the entity and the killers alike. While David was the closest to being the least useless alpha, your nose still wrinkled at his use of scent to try to ward off the beta killers and to posture at the alpha ones.

The only survivors you truly respected, truly thought were worth your time to talk to were Laurie and Yui. Laurie taught you after a while how to use a shard of glass you could keep tucked somewhere on your person to stun the killers into dropping you if they’d managed to grab you.

Yui taught you how to lift a pallet after dropping it. The words ‘Hit ‘em with everything you got, then do it again.’ resonated with you so strongly, that even if it wasn’t on the same level as stabbing your captor like Laurie, it still made her stand out compared to the rest of the survivors who were barely more than worms, fearfully eking out an existence around the campfire.

It felt like they were the only ones not just struggling for their lives like everyone else, but truly fighting back.

And if Elodie wasn’t so complacent in being sneaky, her showing you how to pull a pallet down while being carried by the killer would have put her in the pool of respectable survivors.

In your first two months, you learned very little outside of what the killers were called and how they could hurt and kill you in matches.

You noticed only whenever they had managed to catch you if the killer was an alpha or a beta.

And in those first two months, you had thought you’d met all the killers in trials.

There had been another new girl, a beta, right before you. Her name was Yun-Jin, and she kept her distance from everyone just like you did, but you had a feeling it was for different reasons than your own. She looked at everyone with a shrewdness in her expression. Like she knew something no one else did, and she knew how to use the information she had.

You had no doubt she’d sacrifice any single survivor there if it meant saving her own hide. And while self-preservation was an understandable thing, you didn’t agree with the methods of stepping on someone else to do it.

Sure, you held disdain for any of the alphas in the group, but you don’t think you’d go out of your way to use them if it meant your own safety. You may have purposefully blocked Ace once when he’d wanted to keep running and go through a building while in a chase with the Killer, but you’d played it off as being scared and thought the heartbeat had been coming from somewhere else.

No one said anything about it, but some of the survivors were a bit more wary of being near you in trials after that. They couldn’t prove you’d done it on purpose, and Ace hadn’t said anything besides ‘You blocked me in that last trial and it got me caught.’ It seems he had accepted your lie, or deemed it not worth fighting over. Maybe he was scared if he pushed the issue, you’d bring up how he purposefully let you die on hook that one time, and how he ignored you hooked every match now.

Either way, you drifted further and further from the group. It only took a week before you stopped sitting on the logs around the campfire after the Ace incident. Standing in the close treeline around the fire.

And then it went further, you retreated farther from the comforting light. Taking solace in the solitude while sitting at the base of a tree a good 30 or 40 feet from the campfire. It seemed that for the most part, no one ventured quite as far as you did.

Until you saw Nea sneak away.

And she went even further than you.

You’d followed just a bit, curious at how far she’d go, so you tried to keep a line of sight on her.

And as you maneuvered to get line of sight, you crossed path with the trail of scent she left behind. It was stronger than normal, and you had a realization that she was sneaking away because she was going into heat.

You wondered for a moment if she was just going to suffer out in the woods alone instead of turning to one of the alphas or betas in camp. But then, as you continued to follow at a good distance, you noticed the forest thinning out, and the walls of one of the realms come into sight.

Flabbergasted that the realms you did trials in were able to be gotten to from the campfire, you stood out in the open amidst the thinned out trees, just staring at the walls with a growing sense of agitation.

Why had no one told you that you could truly leave the campfire?

Surely Nea wasn’t the only one who knew this information. Someone else, anyone else, had to have noticed her absence from the campfire and have done just as you had. There’s no way at least one other person didn’t know.

You don’t know why this upset you, but it did.

And now you faced a predicament. You wanted to keep following all the way into the realm. You weren’t sure which place it was, but you wanted to know. You wanted to see. You wanted to know if all the realms could be found.

The only thing that had you hesitating was running into Nea, or one of the killers. You didn’t know if Nea was actually allowed to be here, considering she did sneak away in the first place. So you didn’t know if you were allowed. What if the killers could hurt you outside of the trials too? What if entering their realms gave them power over you?

Indecision gripped you for a few long moments, curiosity warring with it inside your mind.

You stood, one foot slightly lifted off the ground as if to take a step back towards the campfire, but after finally throwing caution to the wind, you turned back towards the entrance of the realm, boldly striding in.

If you weren’t meant to be there, it was probably better to act like you weren’t sneaking around and then plead ignorance than be caught sneaking.

It was a slim chance at safety, but you reasoned with yourself that the survivors would be way more scared around the campfire if the killers could hurt you outside of the trials.

So you walked in like you owned the place. Like you were meant to be there.

And upon entering Glenvale, you were surprised that it looked different than when you were here in a trial.

None of the buzzards were picking at long dead flesh. No hooks to be seen.

In fact, it’s like it was what you assumed the actual Glenvale looked like in real life and not the horrific replica that you traipsed around in during trials.

There even seemed to be a sense of warmth to the area, as if it was only just reaching sunset. It was nothing like the gloom hanging around campfire.

You were immediately drawn to it, furious that this existed and you hadn’t know about it until just now. And even if you weren’t supposed to be here, even if some killer came out and told you off for being here, you’d tell them off right back and demand to be let in. You didn’t want to sit with those worms content to be around a measly little campfire when there was this right here.

You looked around, sizing up all the restored buildings around you. You figured if the trials were anything to go by, the saloon would probably be where anyone would be.

And you had questions you wanted answered. Either by Nea, or whoever else might be here.

And so you walked forward, with even more purpose and determination in your step now. You could hear from the street that there was life inside of the saloon. Couldn’t see anyone or anything really from it, but you could hear the low murmur that indicated chatting. That could be someone having caught Nea, but you doubted it from the relaxed tone of it.

You couldn’t hear much until you almost made it to the steps. Once you finally made it to the front of the saloon, looking up the steps and to the swinging doors, you listened out to try to figure out who was talking.

The voices weren’t familiar in the slightest, and there was at least 3 distinct male voices from what you could tell. One was high and nasally, another a bit lower, and the last was hardly anything more than bass.

You didn’t hear Nea, which did make your anxiety kick up just a bit. But before you could second guess yourself and talk yourself out of going in, you marched up the steps, determined to get answers.

Although, your anxiety did have you more gingerly opening just one of the swinging doors rather than making a loud entrance by bursting in through both.

And you were glad for it, because even with your much quieter entrance, the conversation inside still died as all eyes in the saloon landed on you and stared.

Your nerve was tested, as you looked back at a room just absolutely full of killers. Almost every table without an open chair.

It felt like forever, the quiet staring match lasting so long in your head even though it was really only a few seconds before you steeled your resolve with a small breath in before walking further forward.

“I have some questions. First, why the fuck did no one tell me these places existed outside of trials?” At your words and attitude, a few of the killers blinked and then looked around at each other. One in particular, one of the alpha ones you’d gone head to head with a few times since coming here, stood.

“Hey now little lady, ain’t no reason to get cross with us. Ain’t like we can come on over to your cozy little campfire and just chat you up.” At this, one of the smaller killers pipes in, the one with the garish mask and dark clothes. “Not that we didn’t wanna, what with you being one fine piece of ass.”

The big guy who’d stood up, the one you’d been told was the Trapper, grunted at the interruption and turned his head slightly and barked out a harsh “Danny.” sufficiently cowing the smaller man, who held his hands up and went “Woah, just giving the girl a compliment, jeez.”

At his mutterings, the Trapper let out another grunt, this one lower and even more of a warning than his word had been.

At this, the other folded his arms, making a ‘tch’ noise before grumbling out a barely audible “Fine, whatever.”

You prickled at both what the big guy and the smaller guy said. “Cozy? That’s what you wanna call that dreary little shithole?” Irritation at the whole situation making you a lot more angry than you’d been when first entering, making your attitude flare up.

You watched while the trapper reached up, hand slipping under his mask he still wore, like he was wiping at his face exasperatedly.

“Listen, we don’t want no trouble with you, alright? What are your other questions you had? You got the answer to your first one, so what else can I answer for ya, little survivor?” He crossed his arms, but kept his whole body relaxed like he was purposefully trying to appear non-threatening despite his obvious irritation.

You crossed your own arms, foot tapping, showing your own frustration.

“Well, why do you all get to be here, but survivors don’t?”

At this he lets out a low chuckle, the irritation bleeding away a bit. “Well, you’re standing here, ain’t cha?”

This caught you off guard a bit. So you were allowed to be here?

You ventured into the next question a bit more cautiously. “Where’s Nea?”

It wasn’t the exact question you’d wanted to ask, but if survivors were allowed to be here, then Nea was here while they knew about it. Probably seeking relief for her heat with one of the killers, since so many of them were gathered here.

This one seemed to throw the big man off though. “She ain’t here. Ain’t been by at all, s’far as I know. Did you follow her here then? Is that how you found this place?”

You gave a small nod. “She snuck away from the campfire, don’t blame her. Most everyone there is a pathetic alpha or a scared beta. I thought she’d come in here, considering…” you stopped talking as you realized maybe it wasn’t a good idea to reveal Nea was going into heat to the killers who didn’t know she had come here.

“Considering?” He prompted you after you trailed off, and you gestured vaguely. “Considering this is like… the main building?” You hoped that would be enough to cover your blunder, but somehow doubted it.

He stood still for a moment more, before letting his arms fall to his sides. “Well, she ain’t been through here in a while, maybe she came to meet up with someone or to just hide away in one of the outer buildings. Ain’t my business what she does as long as it doesn’t hurt one of mine.”

You almost snorted at that thought, but managed to just make a derisive face instead. “Right, because we could totally hurt one of you if given the chance. Totally.”

Thankfully your snark garnered you a laugh from the big man while the rest of the saloon slowly picked up their forgotten conversations, everyone seemingly able to pick up the atmosphere all at the same time.

“More so than you think, little survivor.” He turned, while doing a follow motion as he went back to the table he’d stood up from.

“C’mon, might as well get to know ya, since I get the feeling you’re gonna be underfoot from here on out.”

And so the last month went by, you getting to know and spend more time with most of the killers. They generally tolerated your presence, some more welcoming than others. The Trapper, who’d introduced himself as Evan, was probably the most amiable towards you.

He didn’t step over any boundaries, but it also seemed he showed no true interest in you. Part of you was disappointed, since he seemed to be the only alpha in attendance that was anywhere close to interesting to you. But the other part knew that if he wasn’t interested, then he wasn’t what you really wanted anyways.

Danny, who you had known as Ghostface, had tried to proposition you when Evan had gotten up to go into a trial, but you quickly turned him down, trying your best not to sneer at him now that the only killer you had felt for sure would protect you was gone.

He had accepted your refusal with a bit more grace than you expected, but you couldn’t help but wonder if he’d target you in trials for it like Ace ignored you for the refusal you’d given him.

And at your swift refusal of Danny, most the killers assumed you just weren’t interested period, thankfully.

You went on doing trials day in and day out, not that there ever seemed to be a visual passage of time. The entity seemed pleased with your efforts, rewarding you with new clothes here and there, and gifting you tools to use in the trials that would make them just a bit easier.

Now that you’d gotten to spend some time with the killers, you’d quietly learned some of their quirks. Your observation skills were fairly good after a lifetime of sizing up alphas who approached you.

You escaped trials more often than not, currying the entities favor easily and earning you a small reputation of being a slippery survivor among both groups.

And just as you resigned yourself to forever being alone, knowing that escaping the entities clutches was nigh impossible, you finally got placed in a trial with the killer you’d only heard about from the survivors at this point. You only knew a vague physical description of a flashy male killer that was all about showmanship.

He’d yet to show up to the saloon in your time of visiting it. You wondered if it was just always missing him when you came around, or if he just didn’t hang around with anyone else.

The trial started off easy enough, you started solo near a gen that had a chest nearby, gaining a rather nice toolbox that helped you finish off the first gen quickly before anyone even got hurt.

You strained your hearing as you carefully picked your way through the realm to the next gen you could see. So far there hadn’t been a heartbeat that you could hear and you wondered if you were against Myers or maybe even Danny.

And then you heard someone scream while going down on the other side of the map, and you couldn’t tell from that if it was one of the silent killers or not.

You knew it wasn’t plague, pig, or Freddy because you hadn’t run into any fountains or trap removal spots, and you hadn’t fallen asleep yet.

You crouched in front of your generator, wondering where anyone was. You had seen where the person downed was hung, but they got unhooked pretty quickly. Was everyone else on that side of the realm?

You almost blew your gen when who you assumed to be the savior of the last hooked person was downed without even being hit before, and you felt dread.

The music for a tier 3 Myers hadn’t played, and you hadn’t felt like it was Danny, so who else could down someone without hitting them?

No totems had been cleansed, so it wasn’t haunted grounds. They hadn’t gotten pulled off a gen or out of a locker.

As you thought harder about who it could be, you felt your palms sweating, forcing you to pay extra attention to the gen in front of you, almost missing the last person getting instant downed while the killer was still carrying someone.

You finished your gen just as the second person got hooked, and you felt a moment of fear root you to the spot as you debated trying to go for the unhook save.

There was no screaming before the downs, so it wasn’t clown throwing his bottles at people.

As you contemplated your next move, inching along an outcropping and trying to get line of sight on the hook, and maybe see where the killer was, Feng popped up next to you, holding in her sounds of pain well enough that you hadn’t even heard her approach.

You set about patching her up, a bit rattled from the knowledge that you really didn’t know who it was, and you didn’t feel safe enough to ask out loud who it was to Feng.

She nodded at you, a thanks for the heal as she ran off in the opposite direction of the hooked survivor. Looks like it was up to you, or maybe the fourth survivor, but they were still hurt.

You felt on edge, the back of your scalp itching like you were being watched but you couldn’t spot the killer or even hear the heartbeat that let you know if they were close or not.

It was Kate on the hook, already struggling with the entity. You felt a pang of guilt, realizing you might have gotten to her sooner if you hadn’t froze early by your finished gen.

Just as you reached up, pulling her off completely, you felt a sting on your side.

Letting out a small whine as you looked in the direction of whatever was thrown your way, and making eye contact with a tall man in a yellow coat, who was grinning as he held another little throwing knife. He was still a good distance away, but you could have sworn you saw him wink at you before throwing the next knife that hit your shoulder.

Kate and you quickly scattered, and you tried to put things in between you and the killer, feeling another sting every 4 or 5 seconds, not giving you a moments reprieve.

Just as you reached the building, you felt a knife hit a particularly tender spot, making you cry out and almost double over before you sprinted as far away as you could get, going deep into the building, hoping the basement was at the killer shack this trial.

You felt another sting hit your shoulder, and you really didn’t have the time to try to check behind you as you desperately ran through the building, trying to duck and weave, not knowing exactly where he was coming from in your panic to escape him.

You could hear him now, and the heartbeat that always kicked up around killers. You could never tell if it was your own heart the entity made to beat so intensely, or if it was the killers themselves, and it was a projection.

At this point, you really didn’t ask questions, since it seemed no one really had the answers to those ones.

You felt the fear kick up even more as he seemed to laugh in amusement at your struggles. You managed to get out the other side of the building, running into a spooked Claudette as you vaulted out of the building. She was still bleeding from getting unhooked earlier and you realized she must have been the first person to be hooked.

After the first moment of shock, you both split apart as you heard the ting of a blade barely missing you and hitting the place right above your head.

You made a mad dash to the left, leaving Claudette to run off to the right as you heard the killer vault the window smoothly. You turned the corner, hoping that being out of sight would make him run a different way but you wouldn’t hold your breath.

A swift feeling of guilt hit you as you hobbled away from the building, hearing the heartbeat fade and you knew he had gone for Claudette instead of you.

And your suspicions were confirmed when you heard her scream and saw her go down inside the building. You hadn’t been paying attention as you ran through, more concerned about avoiding those awful knives, so you felt your dread building as you waited to see where he would hook Claudette, hoping the basement wasn’t in the main building.

You crouched behind a silent generator, immediately getting to work on coaxing it to life as your fears were confirmed. You could see the outline of Claudette being hooked in the basement of the building, a sour taste filling your mouth at that.

She was struggling, but you were hurt. Going into the basement without getting healed was asking to have two hooked instead.

You carefully worked on the gen, keeping both an eye and an ear out for the killer, almost slipping when another gen got completed on the other side of the building, drawing the killers attention away from where you were for sure.

And just after the gen finished, you head the scream of Feng going down on first hit again. How was he doing that? His knives hurt, but it took a long time before he even managed to really hurt you with them. The sheer adrenaline of trying to survive in the trial made it so you brushed off most the hits until it had just been too many.

The sour taste in your mouth grew as Kate’s scream followed almost immediately after, and suddenly you were the only standing survivor.

You felt remorse for not taking the killers attention when you watched Claudette be taken by the entity from the basement just as you started towards the building again.

You had to at least try to get Feng or Kate up, you couldn’t let them die like you’d let Claudette die.

You tried you hardest not to cry out as you made it through the building towards where you could see Kate still on the ground, trying not to bleed out. You couldn’t quite stop the whimpers, but you did manage to make it to her undetected so far.

You could hear the heartbeat, but it was faint. Poor Feng was being taken away from the building. You didn’t have to touch Kate much before getting her up, and the moment you pulled her to her feet, she bolted from you. You wanted to call out, to have her let you heal her up before you went on, but she was running in the direction you’d come from instead.

You shook your head slightly, quickly making your way towards Feng, who’d been hooked just as you picked Kate up.

She was holding the entity back, but just barely. You made eye contact with her, and almost cried out when she saw you and then just let go. You’d been coming to get her, you were so close, just behind a rock nearby.

The heartbeat was fading too, why did she give up?

You grit your teeth, upset with yourself for letting two of them down in one match.

Your attention was called back to the building when you heard Kate scream again, watching in horror as she was pulled from a locker by the killer and swiftly carried to the basement, instantly being taken by the entity once hooked.

If you had been quicker earlier, she could have at least held off the entity for a bit, given you a chance to try and save her.

If you had just been quicker, and not so scared of the new killer.

You held in your want to cry out, to lament your failure this trial. You had to try to escape, to find the hatch. You couldn’t let their sacrifices go in vain. You were one of the survivors who always escaped, you had to do this.

You threw caution to the wind, making a quick of a run towards killer shack as you could, hoping that hatch would spawn there like you knew it did often.

You heard his laughter at almost the same time the heartbeat started again.

Fear spiked, gripping your own heart as you felt the first burning sensation of a knife hit your lower back. It wasn’t enough to drop you, but it did hurt.

You couldn’t make yourself run any faster, and there wasn’t many trees or rocks to hide behind in this direction. You felt the hot sting of metal bite into your shoulder then the middle of your back, and one winged by and sliced your cheek. He was throwing quickly, one after the other. Two more hit your back, one hit your upper thigh and another hit your back. He missed two when you almost staggered, going off behind the first rock you’d come into.

You knew the jig was up, you could only dance around the rock with him for so long, feeling a knife hit the front of your shoulder this time as you switched directions, still trying to get away.

The next one would make you go down, you were barely standing as it. You felt the blood drip down from the cut on your cheek, the wounds all over your body screaming for your attention and making it hard to focus on dodging any more.

You hadn’t made anymore eye contact with him ever since the first time when you’d unhooked Kate. Something inside of you was scared at how he’d react to more. He seemed to like being looked at, having gotten more vicious when there was more than one person nearby, when he’d downed Kate and Feng back to back.

You almost tripped, and that was your undoing. Uneven footing made you falter for just a split second, and it was enough for him to clear the side of the rock and land his last knife, burying into the front of your thigh, biting in deep and making you collapse finally.

You fell forward, doing your best to hold yourself up long enough that the fall didn’t dig the knife in deeper before the entity made it disappear from you like it had the others.

You lay there, cursing yourself for fumbling so much through the match, and not just committing to saving the other survivors earlier on.

You heard him almost panting as he approached, a manic giggle leaving him, excited to have finally caught the last of the survivors.

There was no more energy left to even turn your head to look at him, you just laid there, weakly groaning as all the little wounds caught up and really made their presence known.

He stood over you, the heartbeat almost deafening as you waited for him to haul you up and carry you to a hook any moment now.

When he didn’t pick you up for a solid ten seconds, you finally rolled yourself just enough to look up at him. And what you saw both terrified you and sent a thrilling shiver down your spine.

He was staring down at you, as if transfixed by what he saw.

You were still in too much pain to really take much else in, but when he suddenly knelt down over you, hand reaching out to tip your chin up to look at him fully, you gasped.

The rich scent of alpha finally made it to your nose, but you realized even during chases, he hadn’t been pushing any scent out. And he had sounded rather excited. Something was trying to click together inside your brain, but you were a little too out of it and too shocked by his actions to piece the information your brain was trying to put together into one cohesive piece.

He leaned down just a bit, his gaze roving around your face, his thumb and forefinger holding your head still in his hands.

You stayed perfectly still, not sure if it was fear or something else keeping you in place as he examined you closely.

“미인”

In your dazed state, you misheard him. “Hey, I’m not that tiny…” sure, almost all the killers were taller than you, but he didn’t have to say you were mini.

His head cocks to the side, before a boisterous laugh escapes him, startling you. “Ahh, you only speak English then.”

His smile is nothing like the manic grin you’d caught glimpses of during the trial, it’s a bit more at ease. Just a bit though. You could tell there was something lurking beneath the surface.

Maybe if you weren’t so out of it from the blood loss, you might have pulled away from his deepened touch.

“I said miin, which means beautiful.” His grin doesn’t quite reach manic again, but it does change from the mirthful one from earlier to one that was predatory.

He keeps your chin in his grasp for a few moments more as you register what he said, before suddenly hauling you up onto his shoulder and walking off in a direction you couldn’t ascertain from your position and the sudden dizziness from being carried.

All you’re able to do is steady yourself just enough by pressing your hands against his back, but you don’t try to struggle out. Honestly, you’re just too tired to at this point. You’d been bleeding for a while now, and while it had slowed to a sluggish trickle, you’d still lost a lot of blood.

He easily walked along, hardly even slowed down with you on his shoulder. He was humming as he headed towards wherever he was going, arm keeping you securely on his shoulder by wrapping around your lower back.

Just as you were about to muster the courage to ask where this strange alpha was taking you, since you’d seen him pass several hooks on his journey, he was hauling you back over his shoulder, holding you in front of himself for a moment before giving you a grin that sent chills up and down your spine as he let you drop straight into the open hatch.

The last thing you saw before you reappeared at the campfire was his gaze staying steady on you as that grin split his face.

You came to near the logs everyone sat on, still disoriented but instead of blood loss, it was the normal dizziness that came from regenerating from trials.

Even if you were still a bit wobbly, you turned away from the fire and started your way towards the edge of the forest, determined to find that strange killer.

You played the trial over and over in your head again, trying to figure out just what was drawing you to him.

Just as you reached the edge of the forest and it thinned out, you realized he hadn’t been using his scent at all during the trial. You’d barely been able to figure out he was an alpha and only when he had gotten close enough to carry you.

You stopped at the edge, a dawning epiphany hitting you, one your brain had tried to show you in the trial. He was strong… without his scent. Honestly, you didn’t think he’d even used his scent at all during the trial, even when he’d picked you up.

Meanwhile, you were sure you’d probably been subconsciously scenting off in fear. Maybe that’s what had him pausing at the end, when he’d held your face.

You felt your cheeks heat up slightly, before shaking your head. You didn’t know for sure if this alpha was right for you, no need to get ahead of yourself.

But… what was it he’d called you? It meant beautiful. And he hadn’t scented when he said it. Maybe he was different.

Taking a deep breath, you shook your head once more. None of this would matter if you couldn’t find him outside of the trials.

So with new purpose, you strode into Glenvale, ready to interrogate whoever you needed to to find the killer.

Your steps were hurried, taking the steps up to the saloon in one small hop, and pushed the doors open obnoxiously, too preoccupied with your own mission to realize how loud it would be.

So when the swinging doors smacked against the wall, it startled everyone, including you.

You barely had time to register that there was only a few people in the saloon before Evan grumbled at you. “What’s got a bee in your bonnet today, brat?”

Stuck in place just inside the door, you looked to him as you mumbled out a soft “Sorry, didn’t mean to open them that hard.”

What drew your attention next was someone standing from the table, hidden by the bulk of Evan until just then.

“Ah, I was just about to ask where I could find you, and here you are.” There was a playfulness to his voice, and his grin mirrored the one he’d been giving you when he’d dropped your through the hatch just a few minutes ago.

He was already walking over towards you, and you were still stuck in place, but instead of it being mortification, it was something else.

You didn’t even smell him, but just seeing him had you staying still.

Maybe you were a bit in over your head, but the possibility that there was finally an alpha that could cross off all your check boxes? It was too good of an opportunity to pass up.

Your hands clenched and unclenched as you waited for him to reach you.

“Would you join me on a walk?” He was right in front of you now, looking down as you fidgeting in front of him. Why were you nervous? He was just another alpha, you didn’t have anything to worry about. He couldn’t hurt you out of trials, and he could only do so much in trials, so why were you nervous around him?

You looked past him for a moment to see that Evan had turned away. Seems he wasn’t worried about the new killer talking to you, and he was always quick to put himself between you and the more… questionable killers.

So when you met gazes, you gave a tentative nod.

He walked past you, opening the door and standing outside of it, still holding it for you as he looked back watching you walk over to him.

The predatory look was gone, replaced with a lax smile. Like he had fully relaxed. An air of easy going swam around him as you almost meekly exited the building.

You’d never really thought how you would react to finding an alpha who might be good for you. This almost spooked approach was not what you’d expected from yourself.

He didn’t strike up any conversation as you left the realm of Glenvale and wandered farther than you’d ever gone before, passing some other realms you’d not seen outside of trials before.

He did however, pick up a lazy hum of a song. It didn’t seem to have a rhyme or reason to it, nothing you recognized at least.

“So, little omega. How long have you been hiding from me?” His voice startled you out of your own thoughts, and his words made your face flush.

“I… haven’t. We just haven’t been in a trial before now.” You were telling the truth at least, so he shrugged at that.

His hum changed to one of thought instead of song, drawn out a bit before he looked back at you from over his shoulder. “Well, now that we’ve met, don’t go hiding from me~.” The wink he gave you before turning back had you almost faltering, falling just a little bit behind before hurrying a bit to keep up again.

You weren’t sure how to respond to that. Was that his way of flirting with you?

Instead of saying anything, you just gave a small nod. He really did have the upper hand here, and you could only hope you hadn’t made a grave mistake following him out of the saloon.

He leads you past all the realms and into the forest on the other side. And just as it feels like he's leading you in circles, you pop out of the treeline in front of a cabin, just sitting in the clearing in front of you like it had been taken right from some magazine about Natural Living For The Rich and Wealthy.

Why was it always the killers getting fancy realms and cabins to stay in but the survivors had to stay around a dingy little campfire without so much as a tent to sleep in?

Your small spike of jealousy was forgotten when he opened the front door, ushering you inside with that same easy going air about him.

He wasn’t even glancing over his shoulder anymore, he just expected you to follow him deeper into his dwelling.

And you did, eyes wide and nose twitching at the sudden increase in his scent. It was old though, just what’s rubbed off on the cabin from him staying in it for upwards of 4 months now.

And you could feel the shift in the atmosphere when he heard your subtle sniff you couldn’t stop yourself from doing.

He casual spun around, leaning against the back of the couch, giving you a once over before that smirk was back.

“Do you like what you see, little omega?” The laugh in his voice sounded almost threatening, but it only sent a thrilling shiver down your spine when his eyes lidded while watching you from where he stood.

“I… It’s a very nice cabin. Shame only you killers get things like this. What I wouldn’t do for a tent at this point. Falling asleep leaned against a tree gets old at some point.” You tried to cover your embarrassment from being caught taking in his scent with your very real envy that the killers got special treatment.

His laugh was a bit unexpected, but it sounded genuine. “You know,” he pushed up from the couch, closing the distance easily, almost looming over you in mere moments, hands in his pockets as he leaned into the wall just beside you “you don’t have to stay at that campfire if you don’t want to…”

There was a suggestion in his tone, words unsaid, but clear on his face. He was leaning just a bit closer now, that signature grin back on his face as he watched you squirm under his intense gaze.

Part of you wanted to play dumb, to say something like ‘Oh, sure. I’ll just go ask Evan for a room in his mansion.’ but the look he was giving you had all your fire from before sizzling out.

Or maybe it was more apt to say it was burning differently now.

The temptation to finally give in to your more submissive instincts was great, but after a life of telling off shitty alphas, you weren’t sure how to go about flirting back with one now that you were here.

Your silence didn’t bother him, it seemed. His grin still in place as he leaned over you.

Every thought flitting through your head as you tried to find the right thing to say left you as he finally reached up to capture your chin, just like he had during the trial earlier.

“That is, if it’s what you want~.”

He was teasing you and also reassuring you. You could figure that much out by the softness with which he held your face.

The closeness was clouding your mind, but you knew that you were interested in his offer.

You faltered under his gaze, but finally found your voice. “I… you’re not scenting off… are you?”

It wasn’t really a question, but more of a realization. He nodded nonetheless, leaning back up just a bit, shrugging.

“Don’t need to.”

His confidence with those three little words sent an electric current through your whole system, leaving your fingers tingling after a small shiver has his eyes narrowing every so slightly, pulling up in a smile as he leans back in.

“But I can, if you ask nicely.”

You don’t even think before the barest whisper of a ‘please’ leaves you, finally giving in to your instincts.

He closed the distance, other hand coming to your hip to pull you closer to him. His face was so close, and the excitement at this new experience was absolutely overriding any thoughts of your past.

And all at once, you were surrounded by his scent. You couldn’t help the little gasp that escaped, but it only seemed to please him.

“That’s it, little omega.” He moved until his mouth was almost pressed against your ear, whispering out a little “Relax a little, I’ll take good care of you.”

He had your head spinning well before that, but when he nuzzled against your neck, taking in his own deep breath, you couldn’t help the little whine that left you.

His rich laugh reverberated through your whole body, sending tingles to all your extremities and lighting a fire low in your belly.

“Sensitive, aren’t we.” You could feel his smile against your skin, his teeth grazing against your scent gland, lighting up all the pleasure centers in your brain and causing a rush of slick to leave your panties an absolute mess as you trembled beneath him.

His grip on your hip tightened, a low rumble leaving him as he appreciated your own scent. “That’s good, it’s gonna be fun with you so responsive.”

You reached out, hands gripping at his open coat. You were dizzy from the rush of all these new feelings. Sure, you’d done plenty during your heats, but none of that had any feeling behind it. This was so different, it was like you were an inexperienced virgin again, unsure of where to put your hands or what to do with your body.

Thankfully, he was taking charge, pressing you into the wall and sliding his leg between yours as he kept nibbling gently against your neck.

He drew out more little whines from you, the hand on your chin wandering down to ghost feather light touches down your side, his mouth gradually moving to nip at your chin and then hungrily at your lower lip.

His presence was heavy, devouring you without even trying.

When you responded to his insistent presses against your mouth positively, he groaned out his approval, teeth grazing your lip before sucking softly at it to soothe the slight sting.

Your own moan that followed spurred him on a bit more, hands moving to either side of your thighs before lifting you.

While you expected him to pin you against the wall right there, he surprised you by standing up fully with your legs wrapped around his waist and your arms hastily thrown around his shoulders to hold yourself up.

He hadn’t stopped leaving little kisses on your face either, keeping you distracted as he walked farther into his dark cabin, not even bothering with the lights.

It was only when you were being laid down underneath him on a very soft bed that you did anything besides hold onto him.

While everything in you was telling you he was in charge, that didn’t mean you couldn’t do anything to help him along.

With lust fueling your actions, you pressed your hips up against him, doing your best to grind against him with your legs wrapped around his waist.

Doing so earned you a low growl and him pressing a bit harder into you as he claimed your lips in a kiss that took your breath away.

Everything about him was larger than life, almost overwhelming you as he licked at your lower lip before teasing along your own before finally releasing your for a breather.

He was still impossibly close, but you managed to clear your head enough to start lifting your own shirt off, since his jacket was the only thing in the way besides his pants. He sat up, hands moving your legs from around him so he could shrug out of his bright yellow jacket and toss it to the side of his bed, hands finding your bare skin being revealed as you shimmied out of your top.

You would have blushed when hearing his appreciative hum, but you were a little too turned on, seeing him kneeling over you, looking like sinful perfection as his hands trailed down your stomach to graze the top of your shorts you wore.

He went slow, unbuttoning then with a gleam in his eye, that predatory feel coming back as his teeth glinted in the low lighting.

You complied with his slight tug, lifting your hips enough that he slid them down your hips before sitting back fully, pulling them down your thighs and to your knees, lifting your legs to be almost flush with his body and he pulled your shorts off, keeping you legs pinned against his front, pressing a soft kiss against your calf as he drank in the sight of you flushed and almost naked beneath him.

“미인”

Even through the fog of lust, you remembered him calling you that before. Something about how you were beautiful.

Your face got substantially warmer, but you managed to get out “You’re not so bad looking yourself.” but you couldn’t quite manage the cocky smile you wanted to have go along with it when he nipped at your calf where he had kissed just before.

He was enjoying being above you like this, getting to watch your reactions as his hand not holding your legs to his chest trailed down the front of your thighs, ghosting against the dip in your hip before tugging playfully at the edge of your slick soaked panties.

You could feel his own excitement pressed against the back of your left thigh, and could feel how he tensed slightly when you squirmed in his hold, letting out a moan when the pad of his thumb swiped against your mound.

“You’re already so wet for me, little omega.” His voice was husky, low and vibrating through your legs pressed against his chest.

Whimpering in response to the stronger press of his thumb circling slowly, he had you writhing beneath him with very little effort.

It was like he knew just where to press to give just enough pressure to build you up quickly. He had you wrapped around his finger in no time, your gasps turning into absolutely filthy moans as he moved your panties to the side, exposing you to him finally.

His fingers ghosted across your slick soaked folds, spreading them slightly and groaning at the sight.

And just like that, he wasn’t teasing anymore.

He let your legs down, hands easily undoing his belt and pushing his pants and boxers down his hips, eyes never leaving you.

You were just as eager, moving to rid yourself of your panties and undo the bra you wore, thankful they at least matched today.

He let you know he appreciated your efforts by pushing you back down, mouth closing around your left nipple, while his hand found its way to your hip, steadying himself as you found his way back between your thighs.

You instinctively wrapped your legs around him again, pulling a soft moan from him when your bodies pressed closer. His cock throbbed at the delicious friction your bucking provided, but he only allowed it for so long.

Sitting back just a bit, raising his head from your chest and making full eye contact with you before purring out “Careful little omega, you’re playing with fire~.”

And even though your brain was telling you this was a very bad idea, you went ahead and poked the lion anyways.

Biting your lip, you pressed yourself up, rubbing yourself against the underside of his cock for just a moment more before he let out a much lower growl than before.

You had less than a second to react before he flipped you over, pulling your hips back into him to press his aching hard on against your heat.

Before you had a chance to gather your bearings, he had you pinned under him, teeth closing around your scent gland once more, sucking softly while ever so slightly grazing your skin. A reminder of your position, of how this was going to go down.

A rumbling approval thrummed through you when you presented properly, no longer embarrassed by your own instincts.

He greedily pressed against you, rutting slightly, simply enjoying your soft skin for a moment before reaching a hand down and slowly pressing a finger into you, earning him a long drawn out mewl as he felt you grip at him. He quickly added a second, working you up easily and mercilessly.

And through the whole thing, his mouth never left your neck. He was working you into a frenzied mess underneath him with just his hands and mouth, your legs shaking from the sudden intensity of the buzzing feeling between your legs, leaving you dizzy as he licked and sucked around your scent gland, taking his sweet time getting you ready for him.

You were already so close just from his fingers working you open for him, so at the sudden press of his cock, you almost came right there, gripping at the first inch of his cock as he slowly sunk more into you.

He finally let up on your neck, but stayed right there, nuzzling at your ear, purring slightly.

It wasn’t long before he finally stilled, seated fully inside of you, groaning at the warmth hugging him into you.

He sat still, just enjoying the feeling of you fluttering around him. He felt your impatient little press back into him, grin splitting his face as a low laugh reverberated through your whole body with him this close, practically draped over your own form beneath him.

“You want more?” There was mirth in his voice again, but also an edge of warning.

Despite the voice in your head telling you it was a bad idea, you nodded a bit desperately.

A low hum set your whole body thrumming with need, you could feel his smile press into your skin as you barely made out his whisper.

“Remember, you asked for it…”

You didn’t even have a second to second guess yourself, his hands moved, one arm holding him up while the other went to hold your hips in a vice like grip as he withdrew half his length and then plunged back in, knocking the breath right out of you.

He gave you no recovery time, setting an almost brutal pace, hips canting at an angle that had you seeing stars and trying to get any air in as he practically used you beneath him.

While he was enjoying still being over top you, and so close, but he wanted to hear you. He wanted you crying out for him.

Leaning back, he moved both hands to your hips, eager to hear your first moan now that you could get a breath in.

His hips snapped forward, the power behind his thrusts ramping up quite a bit, and he was rewarded with a loud keen as he kept that same fast and deep pace from before.

He felt you clamp around him, letting out his own groan at the sensation. You could feel his fingers digging in just a bit harder, knowing you’d have light bruising from the treatment, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care in the moment.

The bed sheet beneath you swam in front of your eyes, the pleasure bringing you to near tears as he adjusted yet again, pushing your face into the bed with one of his large hands splayed between your shoulder blades. And it was almost like he could hit even deeper from this position. He was filling you up with every thrust, leaving you a shaky mewling mess underneath him.

You were barely aware of anything besides your own mounting pleasure, but you just barely caught a growled command from him. “Ji-woon… say it”

His tone, deep and absolutely in control had you shivering under him, brain going to putty as you whimpered out what he asked.

A shaky attempt at his name left your lips, and it was close enough that it spurred him on, nails biting into your hip as he got close.

His pace quickened just a bit, and it had you keening out his name for him, music to his ears.

He felt you hit your peak, your orgasm crashing down on you as any noise you were making melted into a high pitched moan that was broken up with each thrust from him chasing his own end along side you.

And while the temptation to knot you was there, he held back, wanting to save that for the first time he’d lay his claiming bite on you in your heat.

You were almost through your own orgasm, body rigid and muscles tight, your ears ringing when you heard a choked out “이거야!” that was followed by a growl and his hips stilling finally, grip on you keeping you in place despite your own pleasure finally leaving you a twitching, boneless mess beneath him.

It wasn’t long before he draped himself over you again, pressing your body into the mattress as he surrounded you with his body and scent. One of a very pleased alpha.

“You did so well, little omega…” his praise left a warmth just beneath your skin, lighting you up unlike anything ever had before.

A surprisingly soft kiss was pressed just behind your ear, followed with a content purr as his hands gently rubbed at where he’d been gripping so hard earlier.

“So perfect, all for me.” His tone was still praising, but it had taken a possessive turn.

And his purr only picked up when you gave a little ‘mhhm’ at his words.

Being only for him didn’t sound so bad.

After all, you’d waited your whole life for the right alpha. Him wanting you just as much as you wanted him brought you a sense of peace.

You’d finally found him, your alpha. And you weren’t going to be letting him go anytime soon.

Translations 미인: (Miin) Beautiful woman

이거야!: (Igeoya) This is it!

#Ji-Woon Hak x reader #Ji-Woon Hak #Dead by Daylight lemons #Dead by Daylight #nsft #a/b/o #alpha/beta/omega #omegaverse #alpha Ji-Woon Hak #Omega reader

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tiramisiyu · 3 years

Text

【未定事件簿】 Tears of Themis: Main Story 7-35 Translation

Translation Masterlist | Video

Chapter 7 – Rains of Monte Cristo: 7-1 / 7-3 / 7-5 / 7-7 / 7-9 / 7-11 / 7-13 / 7-15 / 7-17 / 7-19 ♦️ ♦️ 7-20 / 7-22 / 7-24 / 7-26 / 7-28 / 7-30 / 7-32 / 7-34 / 7-35

Content Warning: This section contains topics that may be uncomfortable to some readers (mentions of abuse). Please proceed with discretion.

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Court Hallway

After the trial ended, I did not leave immediately. Rather, I waited in the hallway for Hang Jiahe.

Soon, she walked over, guarded by two bailiffs.

MC: Miss Hang.

Hang Jiahe: What are you doing here? Are you going to laugh at me?

Hang Jiahe: Are you happy to have beat me?

MC: You’ve misunderstood. I came to tell you something.

Hang Jiahe: What?

MC: Actually… this examination report…

I took out that last examination report again.

MC: Due to time and technical limits, we currently do not have the identification results.

MC: When I showed it in court, I just wanted to add psychological pressure onto you.

Hang Jiahe: …

Hang Jiahe froze for a few seconds, but she then responded quickly.

Hang Jiahe: You tricked me… you tricked me… hahahahahahaha!

She suddenly burst into sharp laughter.

Hang Jiahe: I didn’t lose… I didn’t lose…

Hang Jiahe: I still got my revenge!

MC: …

MC: Miss Hang, can I ask you something?

Hang Jiahe: What do you want to say?

MC: You said in court that Qi Yu tried to hold Hang Fei back “that night”.

MC: But you still murdered her out of hate for her bystander position, correct?

Hang Jiahe: Yes, I hated her for being a coward, hated her for being too scared to resist Hang Fei, hated her for looking on for so many years without lifting a finger!

Hang Jiahe: She knew during those years what Hang Fei was doing to me, so why didn’t she save me?

MC: …

Hang Jiahe: Then… did you know that Hang Fei had also been abusing Qi Yu during those years?

Hang Jiahe: I did. How could she not have been beaten, with how cowardly she was?

MC: Then do you know why she was beaten?

Hang Jiahe: Why?

MC: …

I took out my phone and opened a video featuring Qi Yu’s abuse. That small woman was lying weakly on the floor, passively enduring the man’s punches and kicks. But she kept mumbling something –

“Don’t hurt Jiahe… and those children… stop it…”

Hang Jiahe: What…

MC: Miss Hang, did Qi Yu never do anything during all those times you were abused?

MC: Are you sure that every time, she chose to be a bystander, rather than being forced into her position?

MC: Did you know that Qi Yu said those words in each of the videos she was beaten in?

Hang Jiahe: I…

Hang Jiahe froze for a second, but then she immediately reacted.

Hang Jiahe: So what, then? What do you want to say?

Hang Jiahe: That I misunderstood her? That I shouldn’t have killed her? Then does all the pain I suffered for so many years even matter?

Hang Jiahe: You want me to absolve her? To forgive her?

MC: You’ve misunderstood. That’s not what I mean.

MC: I am not you. I have not endured your suffering, so I cannot request for you to forgive anyone.

MC: I haven’t seen what happened during those years, so I cannot judge whether Qi Yu was actively or passively making her decisions.

MC: And I definitely can’t carelessly determine whether she sinned or not.

I stopped for a moment and looked at Hang Jiahe’s gloves.

In her mind, she probably was the Count of Monte Cristo, Edmond Dantès – someone who had been wronged and could only get revenge for herself. She believed herself as intelligent and as lucky as Edmond, that she would ultimately be the winner. But…

MC: But even Edmond would figure out the situation before his revenge and repay his benefactors.

MC: I’m telling you this, only because I hope you’ll understand what sorts of people you sent away.

MC: I hope you understand that there have been people who intended to treat you kindly.

Hang Jiahe: …

MC: Also, Miss Hang, I can guess why you were not willing to ask for help from the police.

MC: In that sort of situation, you may have thought that you couldn’t rely on the outside world to go against them.

MC: But even so, me, Captain Morgan, and many, many people still have to do something.

I flipped further into the examination report.

MC: Even if Hang Fei is gone, the things he’s done will not disappear with him.

MC: This is the report we’ve created. Captain Morgan’s already sent it to upper management and applied for international cooperation.

MC: Miss Hang, we will bring you the justice you deserve for the pain you’ve experienced.

MC: As for the last few people, I promise that they will receive the punishment they deserve.

MC: So, for the rest of your life, please don’t live in hate.

MC: You’ve already stayed in the darkness for long enough. Please try to take a step forward.

MC: Doesn’t it say that in your beloved “The Count of Monte Cristo”?

MC: “He who has felt the deepest grief is best able to experience supreme happiness.”

MC: Miss Hang, if possible, please try it.

MC: Perhaps the light you’ve always been searching for isn’t too far away.

Hang Jiahe: …

Hang Jiahe: Ha… ha… hahahahaha!

Hang Jiahe broke into sudden, sharp laughter. It sounded like a heartrending sob was woven in it, as it resounded in the empty hallway, melting into the rain.

Amid the grey deluge of rain, specks of light leaked through. Maybe the downpour would finally end this time.

Not long after, Simon’s homicide case opened trial, and Wang Chunchong was deemed the murderer. Xingrui Estates declared that they would be depriving Xu Yin of her position and removing her from the family. Only Tyson received the weakest blow, as the evidence for instigation of murder was insufficient. However, lots of people online were saying that they hoped he would “succumb to the demon of illness as soon as possible”.

Thus, the homicide case of the couple in Yaofu Community came to an end.

✼ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✼

NXX Base

After the Hang Jiahe case concluded, the NXX investigation team met up at the base again for discussion.

MC: That’s how the Hang Jiahe case went.

Marius: Thanks for your hard work!

Artem: Thanks for your hard work. You did excellently.

Luke and Vyn nodded at me.

MC: Thanks, everyone.

MC: Enough about me – how’s everyone else’s investigation?

Artem: I’ve already updated Tyson’s case file. I haven’t found any new clues for now.

Marius: I followed what Wang Chunchong said and investigated that guy named Xiao Ren, but…

Marius: I haven’t found anything for now.

Luke: You also found out about Xiao Ren?

Marius: Huh?

Vyn: What a coincidence. I, too, found out about him.

MC: !!!

Luke: Marius, what information do you have on Xiao Ren right now?

Marius: Mainly what Wang Chunchong told me before.

Marius sighed.

Marius: According to Wang Chunchong, Xiao Ren is linked to Heirson’s raw materials purchases.

Marius: Tyson held Xiao Ren to very high regard, and keeps his occupational information on severe confidential status.

Marius: All in all, this person seems pretty mysterious.

Marius: What about you, Luke? What did you find?

Luke: The aunties in the group told me that Zhao Fei kept looking for someone called “Xiao Ren”.

Luke: I suspect that Tyson brought up this person in the recording that he sent him.

Marius: That’s possible. Wang Chunchong also heard Tyson bring up Xiao Ren, so there should be some sort of link between them.

Artem: Luke, that’s not all the information that the assistive team provided you, is it?

Luke: Yep, that’s not all.

Luke: First, the workers in Heirson where the abnormalities appeared were mostly on the production front lines, so what they touch the most are the products.

Vyn: They probably mixed in their developed illegal drugs into the products, resulting in infection.

Luke: That’s right.

Luke: Secondly, about Zhao Fei…

Luke ripped out a page from his notebook and placed it on the table.

Artem: These names are…

Luke: When I was questioning these ten people about Zhao Fei, their reactions were a bit abnormal. I suspect that…

Luke: They’re the ones hiding Zhao Fei.

MC: What about you, then, Dr. Richter? You just said that you also found out about Xiao Ren.

Vyn: I spoke with half of the 20 special respondents and noticed that it was the same doctor in charge of their examinations.

Vyn: And that person is named “Xiao Ren”.

Vyn: So I suspect that this person knows many secrets regarding Heirson’s experimental data.

MC: If so, this Xiao Ren person knows about where raw materials come from and can deal with the experimental data…

MC: If we can find him, we might be able to patch up the missing part in our evidence chain against Heirson.

Marius: So this Xiao Ren is going to be our investigative focal point from now on?

Luke: Leave it to me, then. I’m the best when it comes to finding people.

Artem: Then leave Zhao Fei to me. I just happen to have something I want to confirm with him.

Vyn: I have only met with the special patients. I will continue to meet with the remaining bunch.

Vyn: Marius, what are your plans?

Marius: Me? I plan to go see Hang Jiahe.

Marius: She wanted to find reporters in the past to drop major news about Heirson, and she’s now in jail…

Marius: We should find out what this news is.

MC: Oh yeah, I’d forgotten about that!

Marius: So, jiejie, want to come with me to see Hang Jiahe? After all, only the two of us know her the best.

MC: Uh…

I suddenly had a bad feeling.

Luke: Marius, do you really need someone to accompany you just to go see someone?

Marius: I’m not going to see a typical person, am I? I’m going to see someone who might give us an important clue.

Marius: It makes sense to be a little more cautious and bring someone else.

Luke: Then just bring your assistant. If anything else, then bring some recording equipment.

Luke: Convenient, and it can record in real time.

MC: …

Right after, Artem spoke.

Artem: Zhao Fei’s case was ours to begin with, and now that we have clues…

Artem: MC, let’s finish it off, alright?

MC: Lawyer Wing…

Vyn: I may be overstepping, but…

Vyn stepped in just before Artem could speak again.

Vyn: May I trouble you to go with me next?

Vyn: There’s a special patient that I need your assistance with.

Faced with their “eager” eyes, I was very sure that –

The investigation team seriously needs to recruit a new member!

✼ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✼ CHAPTER 7 END ✼ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✼

#Tears of Themis #tears of themis translations #tot translations #lu jinghe #zuo ran #xia yan #mo yi #marius von hagen #artem wing #luke pearce #vyn richter #未定事件簿 #feels bad for hjh :'(

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wesimpforxiao · 3 years

Text

Say My Name and I’ll Be There: 9.2

"Oh my god!" Your shriek nearly deafened the yaksha while your nails dug into his shoulder and back. The wind whipped your hair into both of your faces, much to his dismay as he struggled to keep track of his footing. "This is crazy! This is awesome!" Another leap and your heart dropped to your stomach in a fashion that sucked the breath out of your lungs. "W-wait this is terrifying! Xiao! Slow down!"

You asked for this yet have the audacity to panic? Xiao tensed under the increasing grip around his body and made another leap. Well, a 'leap' is a bit of an understatement; whether he was teleporting or zipping through the air, you couldn't tell--it happened so fast your mind couldn't keep up. The two of you were nearing the top of Mount Tianheng, and with every 'jump' he took you'd look down to find another fifty or so feet added to the distance between you two and the ground.

Just as Xiao was beginning to think you wanted him to stop, an exasperated laugh left your lips. "This is awesome!"

The yaksha clicked his tongue at the myriad of sounds you were making. First you were screaming with excitement, then terror, then laughing, and now you're gasping? Will you just make up your mind? Are you scared or not scared? He couldn't keep up with your quick switches just as you couldn't keep up with his speed.

And then there was the fact that you asked him specifically to carry you up the mountain, not climb up with you or merely teleport to the top. Was this the duty of a boy friend? He didn't recall you ordering Aether to carry you at all during your travels. Minus the time you had your leg clawed by that lawachurl, but that doesn't really count--

His feet lightly landed onto the grass at the top of the mountain and he stilled, stealing a glance at your profile. "We're here." Archons, your grip finally relaxed against his stinging skin. He was expecting that classic dumbfounded look on your face, but you pulled away with the widest--and dumbest--grin once your feet lowered to the ground.

"That was amazing-!" You nearly lost your balance from the vertigo of travelling so quickly, but Xiao grabbed your arm before you could stumble over the edge of the cliff. "Can we do that again?"

"You can't be serious," his eyes narrowed in disdain.

"One hundred percent! Come on, please?"

Wha-What is this all of a sudden?! Xiao averted his eyes the second your pleading ones took hold. He let go of your arm as his gaze fell to the grass.

You couldn't contain the gasp within your lips, "You're...blushing?" You don't remember if it's happened before, but the very tips of his ears were pink and it was painfully obvious in the sunlight of late morning. "Xiao, the Vigilant Yaksha, BLUSHING?!"

"I suggest you keep your quips to a minimum unless you--"

"I can't believe this is happening! What did I do to make you blush? You're ears are bright red!" Your hands cupped the sides of your face as you freaked out. He was so neutral when it came to emotion, but the past sixteen hours or so he's shown you more of his vulnerable side. But the adeptus was visibly showing emotion! "This never happened before!"

"There's nothing timid about you, having the courage to mock me. So fight me," he started to raise his glare from the ground. "How long do you think your body will last against my blows?"

"Rex Lapis must've blessed me-!"

In your excitement, you failed to remember that the ledge was right behind you. One second you were laughing your ass off with a face as bright red as Xiao's, and the next you were flailing breathlessly in the air attempting to find solid ground. Xiao's figure shrunk at the top of the cliff as you plummeted. The shock rendered you unable to scream and instead you gasped for breath as the wind whistled in your ears.

Xiao lifted his gaze in time to watch you fall over, and he simply moved so that his gaze could still follow your shrinking figure. "It's a wonder humans survived this long," he muttered with a slightly amused expression. Does she not realize she has her wind glider? He failed to notice the corner of his lips curling upward.

He had no intention of letting you plummet to your death. But after the stunt you just pulled on him, he figured it wouldn't hurt to tease you a bit too. You were by no means anywhere near the ground or any other hazardous objects; his enhanced vision and depth perception confirmed it. Why not let you fall a bit? Maybe your wits would return to you and you'd actually remember the glider attached to your back.

Three...four...five...Xiao counted the seconds. You were nearly half-way down the cliffside. ...Six...She's not going to remember, is she? Seven..."Tch." He prepared to jump.

I-I'm going to die! You finally managed to inhale a reasonable amount of air, not daring to peek behind you at the ground that was closing in. Your thoughts were racing with nothing but panic. Think, think! Think of something! You wanted to smack yourself when you remembered who accompanied you. He wouldn't just let you die like this, it was stupid of you to even forget that much! You involuntarily reached for the cliffside where Xiao was now nothing but a miniscule dot in the distance.

"Xiao!"

Warm arms wrapped themselves around you the instant his name fell from your lips, and the familiar sensation of teleporting enveloped you. You spun around and hugged him as tightly as you could the second your feet touched the ground. He didn't even tense up this time--

"You didn't remember your glider," he pointed out nonchalantly. Almost teasingly.

"That's why you just stood there?!" He grumbled something you couldn't hear and returned your embrace with his head buried at the crook of your neck. His ears were still red. Are you telling me this is how he acts when he's shy?!

The two of you stayed in that position for awhile, never quite loosening your hold on the other as if to ensure they wouldn't float away like an anemo slime or a bloaty floaty. A cool breeze slid across your skin--an intimate gesture Xiao wouldn't dare outright commit, much less think of. And yet the wind entangled itself in your hair much like his hand would clasp around your nape. It seemed to embody the long-lost gentleness of the yaksha. It was subtle. Soft. An indirect display of affection. Maybe it was just your imagination.

Just awhile longer, Xiao's heart yearned as he held you close until rational thought returned to power. Your absence would sting more now that he's seen you, but that didn't take away from the fact that this visit allowed the sealing of your bond, and therefore saved you from a painful demise for the time being. The last thing he wanted was for you to return to Childe, but maybe this is what would prevent his karma from touching you. The farther you are from him, the safer you'd be.

But for right now, just awhile longer, he'll allow himself to drown in your warmth.

...................

"You seem more than eager to get back to work, Mezzetin," Childe teased as he led you through the halls of the palace. The two of you had just returned to Snezhnaya, but the Tsaritsa had apparently no intentions of letting either of you rest after your long journey.

"Don't mistake my happiness for the Lantern Rite as happiness for the Tsaritsa's operations. I'm only cooperating to keep the peace in Teyvat."

"So, when are you going to tell me what you and Xiao did?"

"Excuse me? Since when is my private life any of your business?"

"I have the right to know since you so blatantly disobeyed my orders not to leave the harbor." Childe grabbed the door handle and faced you. "I expected more professionalism from you, but honestly, I'm not at all surprised," he baited with narrowed eyes. "I could tell the Tsaritsa, you know."

Your heart seemed to skip a beat at the thought of facing her again. Something about that nightmare you had when you were with Xiao ignited a vague fear of her that you didn't really have before. You swallowed hard before jutting your chin up at the harbinger. "Do it."

"Oh?" Childe squinted as he towered over you.

"Do it," you repeated. "Who do you think she'll discipline more, since it was a certain harbinger's idea to bring me along and didn't properly watch me?" Childe stared at you for a few silent seconds before twisting the door handle and entering Dottore's lab without another word. Yeah, that's what I thought.

"GAHHHHH!" A deafening, sickening cry of pain snapped you out of your gloating session. It was much like the rest that you've heard; the test subjects of Dottore were often strangers to mercy. But unlike the trials before, there were no piles of bodies lying in the middle of the arena.

"Did he just start for the day?" You forcefully peeled your eyes away from the suffering man and kept them on Childe. It would be unusual if he did; he started in the early morning hours, but you and Childe had arrived in mid-afternoon.

"Dunno," he shrugged slightly.

"Ah! Childe." Dottore noticed your presences and gave a signature manic grin, his arms spreading wide. "We have made a breakthrough!"

"This doesn't look like a breakthrough to me," you muttered loud enough for him to hear. Anger flickered across the masked man's face before he reset his eyes on his fellow harbinger.

"This is the fifth subject of the day." The man's cold stare eyed the suffering Fatui agent with something similar to a sadistic excitement. "It appears your idea to bring that brat with you succeeded."

You didn't hear Dottore, intent on watching the Fatui agent closely. He had finally stopped shrieking, and he pushed himself to his feet rather unsteadily while wiping the sweat away from his forehead. He was healthy despite being drenched in sweat and breathing heavily while he recovered from the subsiding pain. You let out a sigh of relief you didn't know you were holding in. You didn't have to watch another person die at your feet--

Wait a minute. He wasn't dying.

A cool shiver crawled down your spine at the realization, and you flinched when a manic laugh escaped Dottore. "That was the original serum at work. How's that for a breakthrough, brat?"

"That's...impossible," you uttered with wide eyes.

"Thank your superior for making it possible."

Your attention slid to Childe, who didn't bother to look you in the eye. His expression was unreadable, and it remained that way when he escorted you to your room in silence. His presence couldn't feel more hostile in that moment.

"You...my bond...," you choked when the two of you were at the door of your room. "You lied. You used me! You used our bond for your own selfish purposes! How could you?"

"Don't start this, Mezzetin," a weary sigh left him as he turned to you. His allegedly guilty appearance only infuriated you.

"Outside, now."

The second the two of you were outside the palace walls, you let yourself snap into a fit of rage. Childe had barely started to turn around when an ice shard shot at his face, slicing across his cheek. His blood splattered onto the snow, and he wiped at his face to examine his blood on his fingers. "Mezzetin--"

"Don't 'Mezzetin' me!" Hundreds more icicles shot at him in a flurry until he had no choice but to defend himself and summon his hydro blades to parry the blows. "This was the last straw! I'll kill you!"

"Then I'll be more than happy to give you a fight." Despite his usual excitement when it came to battle, he was calm and collected, even so much as cold and distant. He lacked the usual spark fighting always gave him. His eyes were empty and lacking of enthusiasm.

"Tch." Your vision glinted in the sunlight as the temperature surrounding you dropped below zero. Snow whipped through the air to create a barricade that caged the two of you in a small arena. The blizzard made the snowflakes like needles that could cut through skin if one got too close to the edge. Your own powers seldom hurt you, but in your anger, a few rogue icicles cut across your forehead, arms, and your back.

At the pace you were going at, it was self-destructive.

Childe noted this as he parried your every attack despite his blades turning frozen solid now. "Mezzetin! Keep this up, and I won't hold back!" His warning fell on deaf ears.

"What makes you think I want you to hold back? I'm settling this here and NOW!" The snow beneath his feet erupted, sending him spiraling out of the eye of the storm and into the blizzard's rage. You summoned your polearm without hesitation and began to walk towards him.

His arms were stuck to his blades, which were stuck in the ground. He must've attempted to summon a new set and accidentally froze his limbs. He watched you approach, hunched over to shield himself from the blizzard.

"You said visiting him would be good for me!" Your screams were carried away by the wind. "That you realized your own selfishness! This was nothing but more manipulation, wasn't it? You're NOTHING but a lying monster!" The wind grew harsher. Your blade grew sharper once you were a few feet from him.

Cold eyes looked down upon the Tsaritsa's war dog. What a pathetic site it was; an esteemed harbinger on his knees before you. A harsh kick to his jaw dislodged his hands from the ice they were trapped in, and more blood was splattered onto the snow.

"That's it," a smile of satisfaction spread across Childe's lips, making your eyes narrow in disgust. "You're finally showing potential." He sat up with his back to you. "If you constantly fight like this, I'd listen to you more carefully."

"Shut up--!" Your lance stabbed at his figure, but in one fluid motion he swung around and deflected your blade with his hand. A sudden burst of electricity sent you flying several feet backwards. "Ngh!"

"But unfortunately for you, ojou-chan, you misinterpreted the entire situation." Your clearing vision settled on the electro delusion that glinted at his hip. His figure stood over you and a sharp, hot pain tore through your side.

"Gah!"

"I have the right to discipline my subordinates as I see fit," he twisted his blade and dug it deeper into you, completely uncaring that you were squirming around and twitching from the electric shocks pulsing through your body. "Listen closely, girlie, because I won't say it again." You desperately clawed at his weapon, but he held it firmly in place and refused to remove it. "You needn't tell me what you learned from Mr. Zhongli or your adeptus boyfriend. I don't care for that information.

"My bringing you back to Liyue was truly for your own benefit, and it just so happens it was for the Tsaritsa's benefit as well. Make no mistake Mezzetin, I am on your side when it comes to private life. But when it comes to work and the Tsaritsa, my loyalty lies with Snezhnaya.

"I don't care if you don't believe me. If you so badly want to escape the Tsaritsa's grasp, you have much to learn. Patience, for starters." He ripped his blade out of you. "Don't take this too personally, ojou-chan. I don't condone disorderly conduct from anyone under my supervision."

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #xiao genshin impact #genshin impact xiao #xiao x reader #xiao #xiao one shot #xiao fanfiction #fanfiction #say my name and ill be there #childe #tartaglia #childe genshin impact #genshin impact childe #tartaglia genshin impact

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casualreader1234 · 3 years

Text

Reunion

Pairing: Natasha x Reader

An: Part two of the random story idea I had. I think I'm just going to keep the same summary each time because I'm too bad at writing them. I tried to make this gender-neutral, and I don't think I wrote anything that would imply a particular sex, but let me know.

Summary: What if you weren't the hero of the story? What if you were the villain meant to burn the world down?

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Warning: Morally gray protagonist, violence

Word Count: 2k

[Part 1], [Part 2]

This gif is so funny to me.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

When you had first arrived in the U.S, you had been intrigued by tales of the infamous Black Widow, a former Russian assassin turned good, that was enough to catch anyone's attention. To satisfy your curiosity, you had tracked her down, wanting to see her for yourself. Watching her from afar, you understood why she was considered one of the best in her field: her movements always flowed into the next like she was performing a dance.

She easily disposed of her targets, strapping her weapons back onto herself. Seeing the completion of her job, you left the ledge of the building you had been standing of before she could see you. Slipping into the shadow, you had to admit that your interests had been piqued by the assassin.

///

You had always known that your girlfriend had been hiding secrets, but this one was far more exciting than you had thought. Never had it crossed your mind that Natasha might also be involve in the assassin industry. For such a planet, what were the chances of two assassins meeting and starting a relationship without either being the wiser. You weren't sure if that made her exceptionally good at her job, or you exceptionally bad at yours.

Asking around to some of your other contacts, you learned more about the KGB and the Red Room program that had trained Natasha, wanting a glimpse into her childhood. Disgust and rage filled you when you learned about the operation. They had hurt her, so you had made sure they all suffered for their crimes. Then, you returned back to America.

It was the reason you had stayed all these years. She was the reason. Though you've known where she's been all this time, you never revealed yourself. Maybe it was out of fear. Maybe it was out of shame.

It hadn't surprised you that Natasha decided to work for SHIELD. You've also known that she had a good heart, but it did make things more complicated.

She was one of the good guys now. If she ever crossed paths with you, she would be forced to face you as an enemy. So, for both of your sakes, you avoided doing things that would get SHIELD attention, carefully selecting jobs that would run under the radar. You had been careful, erasing most of your tracks, yet here you were, chained down to a table in a SHIELD facility.

Natalia-no-Natasha stared down at you. You unconsciously cringed under her intense gaze.

" How are you darling?" You asked, breaking the thick silence and giving her a small smile. "I must say, you look as stunning as always. Did you do something to your hair? It seems to be shorter."

Natasha didn't reply, instead shaking her head angrily. " What the hell, (Y/n). What are you doing in the U.S?"

Her harsh tone almost made you flinch. “ Here to visit my beautiful girlfriend? I've really missed you.” You tried, feeling a bead of sweat roll down your neck. Natasha may not have any powers but damn was this woman scary when she was mad. Flattery wasn't going to work on Nat though, her face stone cold as she looked down at you.

"That doesn't answer the question, milyy (darling)." She replied with a strained smile.

Tony watched the exchange with a slack jaw, eyes looking like they were going to pop out of his sockets from shock. “ I’m sorry? You know this criminal Nat?”

Your head snapped to the man, jaw clenching. “ Nat?" You sputtered at the intimate nickname. "Who gave you permission to call her Nat?” You swiveled back to look at Natasha. “What is your relationship with him?” You asked accusingly.

Natasha rolled her eyes, turning to Tony. “ Don’t call me Nat, Stark. And this idiot here is (Y/N).”

"Yeah, her [girlfriend/boyfriend] ! " You added helpfully.

The look Natasha gave you was deadly enough to silence you again. She turned her attention back to Tony, " Do you want to fill me on what's happening Stark? I return from a mission and hear from Steve that we had caught a mutant, but I wasn't even aware that we were after one." You frowned at the fact that had she referred to you as a mutant, but chose to ignore it.

Tony shrugged, acting like a bratty overgrown child," No, I don't want to." Natasha's jaw clenched and you decided to lend a helping hand.

Tendrils of black suddenly snaked around Tony, pining him hard against the wall behind him. His eyes widened, shooting to the origin of the magic, seeing you now unbounded and smiling widely at him, the handcuff hanging loosely off the table. Standing up, you rubbed at the red marks on your wrist left by the binds.

"Better answer her, Mr. Stark, I wouldn't want to get on her bad side." You threatened, eyes turning pure black for a split second.

Tony desperately looked at Natasha for help, but she stayed steadfast, unmoved and patiently waiting for him to answer. Realizing that no help was coming, he relented. "Fury got tipped off about some assassin that had been piling up bodies all across the U.S and North America. At first we dismissed them as the work of sporadic killers, not linking the deaths together until we got another tip about them being a mutant. We had Wanda examine a few of the bodies and she confirmed that magic was the cause of death. Since then, we've had our eye set on a contracted killer who went by the alias Reaper. A few weeks ago, we got a hit on their last location, and from there, we planned our trap."

Realization dawned onto you, " You put a bounty over yourself!" You exclaimed with a chuckle, thoroughly impressed by their commitment. It was a good plan, one that you hadn't even considered. Of course, if it had been any other week, the plan would've failed.

Every time you used magic, there was a backlash. The magic was deep inside you, a part of your very being, but it didn't stay that way willingly. The black flames were a dark and ancient form of magic, one that could only be wielded by a select few. Long ago, many groups had tried to master the arts, but most failed. The magic was powerful, more than anyone really knew, and only grew more so as it consumed more energy. Magicians didn't as much wield the magic, as they did subjugate it.

Candidates trained for years in preparation for the infusion, getting their body ready to handle massive amount of energy. When they were deemed ready, they would be exposed to a pure form of the magic. The flames would consume them and their screams could be heard for miles. Most people who entered the last trial end up dead, completely consumed by the magic. A few though, came out stronger. Instead of being consumed by the flames, they had somehow consumed the flames, magic now flowing through their veins.

Even then, the magic inside of wielders fought against their vessels, constantly trying to escape. The ring you wore helped you control the magic inside, absorbing some of the power and trapping the rest of the flames within you, where it couldn't escape and grow any stronger. But every time you took off the ring, you unintentionally let the magic grow, and when it finally returns back to you, the fight inside gets a little tougher.

Normally, it didn't affect you much. You had been trained since childhood to control the magic, so you could go hours with continuous magic use without any major repercussion. But the past month, you had really tested your bounds, toeing the limits of your control. This inevitably degraded your mental state, leaving your mind a little hazy. This meant you were a lot more impulsive and less observant, something that played in favor to SHIELD's trap. You knew you shouldn't have taken the hit on Tony, especially due to your exhaustion, but you had let your excitement of possibly seeing Natasha blind you. Nevertheless, the current situation didn't really worry you anyways, although you made a note to deal with a problem later.

"And why wasn't I informed of this?" Natasha pressed on.

"Don't take it personally. You're area of skills weren't required for the job, so you weren't informed. Simple as that." Tony plainly stated, clearly sensing the Russian's agitation.

You had to stifle your laughter at the irony. If Natasha had been assigned to the case earlier, you probably would've been captured much sooner.

Natasha bit the inside of her cheek, obviously deep in thought as well. " Release him, (Y/N)." She finally said and you happily obliged, but not sliding you ring back on, letting the flames surround you in a hazy aura incase you needed to react to any threats. Tony let out of breathe of relief as your magic retreated, but you could see that he was still a bit shaken up, the effects not fully wearing off.

"Hey are you alright darling?" You asked concernedly, ignoring the wobbling man when you caught Natasha looking a little pale. Walking over to where she was, you reached out a hand to lightly caress her cheek, the flames retreating as it reached her. You hesitated for a split second, unsure of how she would react, but Natasha leaned into your touch. Her eyes met yours. It was the same bright green that you dreamt about, and they looked even more dazzling up close. She smiled up at you and it was like all the years you've spent apart hadn't happened.

"Yeah, I'm fine." She whispered reassuringly and you smiled too in relief. “ What does Fury want with the (Y/N)?” She asked Tony, but her eyes didn't leave you.

“ The same thing we do to all threats. We either eliminate or imprison them .” He answered, voice indifferent.

Natasha turned to him, much to your dismay, “Why can’t we accept them into SHIELD?” she offered instead.

Tony, who had thought your weird relationship with Natasha was the strangest thing that could happen, couldn't believe what he was hearing. “You want to let an assassin into our ranks? Are you crazy?! Did you already get your hands on the vodka shelf?” He stammered.

Natasha gave him a dark look, one that sent a chill of excitement down your spine, “I was an assassin too Tony.”

Tony didn’t seem to know how to respond to that, but he didn’t need to. The door to the room swung opened again, this time a larger blonde man marching in. You recognized him from your intel: Steve Rogers-Captain America. Behind him, you saw several heavily armed agents behind him, their guns trained on you.

Natasha whipped around at the sudden intrusion, surprise flashing across her face. " Steve." She said warningly, noticing the same things you did, but Steve didn't let her finish, already throwing out his shield in attack. The metal was launched at you, cutting through the air faster than the eyes could follow.

You easily caught it, magic stopping it mid-flight.

You sighed at his pathetic attempt, " Mr. Rogers, don't you know it's rude to interrupt? You can't just come in here, guns blazing, and shield flying." You reprimanded, lazily throwing the shield back to the man. Steve tried to catch the shield, but was knocked back by the sheer force of your throw. The men immediately behind him stumbled back in shock as the 6'1 super solider crashed into them. Those who were left standing quickly recovered and upon realizing that their first line of attack had been beaten, prepared to shoot. They found themselves unable to. Fear had crept up on them during the ruckus and now they were unable to move as your magic seeped through them. With a simple wave of your hand, the black flames around you attacked and within seconds, all the agents, including Cap, dropped to the floor.

"What?" Tony gasped in horror, and for the first time, he seemed to truly understand the extent of your power.

"Relax, they're not dead. I just knocked them out for-" You pretended to check your wrist for a watch, " -a while. I don't know, I usually don't wait around for the people I knock out to wake back up."

Natasha was staring in shock at the pile of bodies by the door and you saw something indistinguishable in her eyes. A distinct chime echoed off the walls of the room, drawing your attention to your phone in the corner. You walked over to it, Tony looking like he wanted to stop you but was too terrified to. Picking it up, you read the message silently. Shouting could be heard getting louder, footsteps pounding towards you as alarms blared.

"Looks like that's my cue to leave." You announced to Natasha and Tony. " Sorry to cut our reunion short Talia."

Natasha stepped forward, blinking out of her shock. "(Y/N) wait-!" She began.

"Don't worry, I think I'll be staying a little bit longer in New York. We'll see each other soon my love." You promised, picking up one of the fallen agent's guns and shooting out the lights until you were enveloped in pitch darkness. Then, before the backup agents could arrive, you melted away into the shadows.

///

You emerged from a dark alleyway in some shifty part of the Bronx. Pulling out your phone, you replied to Matt, your associate, declining the new job he had sent over, informing him that you would be taking a vacation for a while.

Seeing Natasha had reminded you of how much you actually missed her, and you didn't want to just leave New York yet, not when you barely had the chance to catch up with your lover.

But first, you had a snitch to catch. Someone had tipped off SHIELD about you. Someone who knew you about your power at that. You couldn't let someone so dangerous live.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------Powers of Reader [Will be updated as more information is learned about Reader]

-Ability to set fear in opponents

-Ability to melt into shadows (teleportation like: goes into one shadow, pops up somewhere else)

-Magic flames that kill people(?) and knocks them out(?)

-Major simp for Natasha (special skill)

#natasha romanoff #natasha x you #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #marvel fanfic series

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