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#please send help for my emotional well being
thef1diary · 3 days
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2k thot 🫣 voice kink w Pierre, just loving it whenever he speaks French even if you don’t know what he’s saying. Make it as spicy you want 🙃
Keep Talking | P. Gasly
warnings: 18+ smut, doggy (it’s Pierre okay 🫣), slight choking, and obvs voice kink
wc: 800+
masterlist
© thef1diary 2024. all rights reserved. Do not copy, steal, translate, or repost any of my work
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You found yourself on all fours, your body arched in ecstasy as Pierre's firm hands gripped your hips. Each thrust sends a jolt of pleasure coursing through you, igniting a fire that consumes every inch of your being.
His fingers dance with precision tracing tantalizing circles around your swollen clit, each touch sending ripples of pleasure through you. But amidst the intoxicating symphony of sensations, it's Pierre's voice that truly sets you ablaze. It's not just the words he speaks, but the language he speaks in, his mother tongue.
"Tu es tellement belle, mon amour," he breathes next to your ear, his voice a velvety whisper that sends shivers down your spine.
You whimper in response, your body trembling underneath his as his words wash over you like a tidal wave of passion. Each syllable, spoken in his native French, is a seductive invitation to lose yourself in the depths of pleasure.
"Tu vas si bien pour moi," he murmurs, the intensity in his voice igniting a firestorm of desire within you.
Each whispered word, each guttural moan, reverberates through you like a melody, his voice a siren's call luring you to the edge of oblivion.
"You're squeezing me so tight, baby, missed me that much, huh?" He asked, switching languages so you can understand and give him an answer.
You whimper and clench involuntarily at his words, biting your lip as he speeds up his thrusts. His fingers slip away from your clit and you almost whine at the loss of pleasure but those fingers quickly wrap around your throat. With his lips grazing your ear, he whispers, "réponds-moi."
"Oui, please, please, Pierre, I missed you so much," you rush out in one breath before another wave of pleasure brings you closer to the edge.
His lips brush tenderly against the side of your head, and you can sense the curve of his smile before he mutters, "that's my good girl."
You make a concerted effort to stifle your own cries and whimpers as his fingers return to your clit, pinching and circling in time with his thrusts. You wanted to focus solely on the intoxicating sound of his voice. Each low groan that escapes his lips, every ragged breath he takes above you, becomes a precious melody that you yearn to etch into the depths of your memory.
Every time he mumbles anything, you clench around his cock, earning a breathless chuckle from him. His amusement is palpable as he realizes the effect his voice has on you, a knowing smirk playing at the corners of his lips.
"Do you like it when I tell you how good you feel around me?" he questions, his voice husky with desire. His fingers trail lightly along the curve of your spine, sending a shiver of anticipation throughout your body.
With a soft whimper, you nod, unable to form coherent words as his voice weaves a spell around you, drawing you deeper into the throes of passion.
"Or," he murmurs softly into your ear, his words a tender caress against your skin, as if he's sharing a precious secret. "I think you love tout about my voice."
You inhale sharply at the sensation of his warm breath against your ear, a shiver running down your spine as his words sink in. The intimacy of his tone sends a rush of desire coursing through you, threatening to consume you whole.
"Is that what it is, mon amour?" He continues, his voice barely above a whisper, laden with a mixture of amusement and desire.
You can't help but nod, unable to find the words to express the overwhelming rush of emotions welling up inside you. It's not just the sound of his voice that enthralls you, but the way it makes you feel — cherished, desired, and utterly adored.
You arch into him, grinding your ass against him as he slips in and out of you. You reach your hand behind you, placing your palm on the nape of his neck, bringing him closer.
"Please," you gasp, your voice a desperate plea as waves of pleasure wash over you, threatening to engulf your senses entirely.
Your eyes flutter shut, your head falling forwards in ecstasy as you struggle to form coherent words amidst the overwhelming sensation.
"Don't... don't stop talking," you manage to grit out, your voice trembling with need. Each syllable is a struggle, torn from your lips as if by sheer force of will. But the urgency in your tone is unmistakable, a fervent plea for him to continue, to keep the intoxicating stream of words flowing.
As his voice washes over you like a soothing balm, you feel yourself teetering on the edge of oblivion, lost in a haze of pleasure that threatens to consume you whole. And in that moment, all you can do is surrender to the overwhelming tide, clinging to his every word like a lifeline in the storm of sensation.
So you do surrender to the overwhelming sensation, allowing yourself to be consumed by the raw intensity of his voice, knowing that in its embrace lies a sanctuary where time stands still, and all that exists is the intoxicating symphony of your shared desire.
Taglist: @lochnoch @llando4norris @monsieurbacteria6 @namgification @lilymurphy03 @sargeantdumbass @hiireadstuff @racingheartsposts @d3kstar @xjval @namjoonswaifu @isabellewinchester @thedecalcomania-blog @casperlikej @khaylin27 @mlioravanfleet @nikfigueiredo @sya-skies @wonnou
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thalialunacy · 2 days
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[for the @calaisreno May Prompts Tour, which affords me the opportunity to be supremely self-indulgent]
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) 13: laugh
Is this still the number for John Watson?
John pauses, thumb hovering. Before he can choose a response, another message flashes in.
It's Harry
He nearly drops the phone. Or maybe he nearly throws it against the wall. Hard to say. 
His reflex to caretake wars with his lingering resentment of her absence. But he knows he would regret ignoring an olive branch… or whatever this is.
Hi
Everything okay?
No small talk, got it
Yes I'm fine, good in fact
and no I'm not going to ask you for money
He breathes in deeply.
I'm glad things are going well for you
And he is, at least in the abstract.
Thanks
I know this is the part where I'm supposed to ask how you are
But you know I'm pants at texting
Can we just have coffee or something?
John taps his phone to his lip absently and considers his options. A public reunion seems like it could be a volatile mistake, not to mention it's 7pm on a weekday. Sherlock is at the lab, Rosie is having her after-supper blanket time, and John is catching up on charting.
And to be honest, he's pretty bored.
Come to mine for tea?
Harry's three dots wibble for a while, which John supposes is fair.
Right now?
With my schedule, I have to take opportunities where I can
Okay, yeah, I'm free
He sends her the address, feeling both pleased and annoyed. One would think that hitting his own rock bottom would make him more sympathetic towards his sister. But really, it just piles helpless anger on top of guilt on top of anger, ad nauseum.
He's not even sure she knows he's a father, for Christ's sake.
Turns out, she doesn't. She walks through the door he holds open for her, and stops abruptly when she sees Rosie. 'Oh my God,' she breathes, staring. 'Oh my God. You--' She turns to John, eyes wide. 'She-- Johnny. She's yours?'
He nods, and despite everything, he feels his face curve into a proud smile. 'Her name's Rosie.'
'Can I--' Harry indicates the blanket with a sharp movement. 'Can I say hello to her?'
'Yeah, course.' He follows her, and folds himself down behind Rosie. 'Sweetheart, this is your Aunt Harry.'
Harry makes a bit of a squawking noise, probably at the 'aunt' bit, but tamps it down. 'Hi, Rosie,' she manages, her voice rough but determined. 'It's lovely to meet you. What are you playing with?'
'Avocados,' Rosie mostly manages to say, then holds one up for Harry without hesitation. Harry takes it with a giggle, and before long they're thick as thieves with a pile of emoting avocados between them.
Harry glances up at him when there's a lull. 'So. The dad life is treating you well, yeah?'
He hesitates, then nods. 'It is now.'
She eyes him, but doesn't ask about what came before now. Instead, she says, 'I'm just going to ask, alright -- who's the other parent?'
He raises an eyebrow. 'Why d'you say there is one?'
Her eyes twinkle. 'Because you do not have the fashion sense to have bought her this outfit. Your bird rich, then?'
He coughs. 'Well. No.'
She waits, though he can see she's trying not to be annoyed by his reticence. She's never understood people wanting to keep things private. 'No?'
'My… flatmate. He's able to buy her things I don't give a toss about, yeah.'
She blinks. 'You have a gay flatmate?'
John feels his ears heat up. 'I do, yeah.'
She seems weirdly impressed. 'You've come a long way from being a rugby lad, haven't you?'
He snorts. 'I'm learning how to do plaits, if you'll believe it.'
'She's not got enough hair for that yet.'
'Sherlock--the flatmate--insists it's a useful skill, though I've no idea why.'
She doesn't reply, and he looks up from where he's helping Rosie with her current avocado. 'What?' he asks, though he knows it's useless. Harry is no Sherlock but honestly, she doesn't have to be, because his emotions have always been written all over his face. It's a curse and a blessing.
'Oh holy shit,' she breathes out.
'Language,' he admonishes reflexively.
'Sorry, I mean-- Holy noses, Johnny.'
'Don't be smug.'
'Oh, I take no credit for this, I always knew the overcompensating locker room talk was hiding something.'
He rolls his eyes, but his lips are twitching. 'Yeah, insecurity about willy size.'
'Okay, ew, first of all. Second of all-- What the--' He gives her a warning look. 'Ever-loving heck.'
'Short version?' She nods quickly. He decides to also give her the slightly-less-mad-sounding version. 'Got married, got pregnant, had baby, wife passed away, realised I had feelings for my flatmate. Who is a man. And who is effectively fathering my child.'
She claps her hand over her mouth, and for a moment he fears she's going to cry, but then realises she's laughing.
'Oi, that's just not on,' he protests.
'But it's ridiculous!' She holds out a hand to him placatingly, speaking through continued laughter. 'It's lovely and sad and all that, but you have to admit--'
There are tears escaping the corners of her eyes, and he feels it begin to bubble up in his chest, too. Her laugh has always been a thing of beauty, of loud, annoying, contagious, unforgettable beauty, and he can't help it.
And she's right, really. It is kind of ridiculous.
He lets out his own laugh, finally, and reaches for her hand.
[❤️]
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muiitoloko · 1 day
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Had an idea for a Alan Rickman story, with a female character. A bit of a smutty idea. Him and a younger actress are preparing to film a very intimate scene with the help of an intimacy coordinator, but the coordinator is making things more difficult then they need to be. So after the day is wrapped, they both go back to the hotel and decide to practice the scene there together. Only it becomes more real then they planned.
if the idea is crap, feel free to scrap it.😀
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Title: Rehearsal
Summary: Things take a different turn during rehearsal for her scene with Alan.
Pairing: Alan Rickman × Actress! Reader
Warnings: Smut
Author's Notes: Hey there! Thanks for sharing your idea! I actually think it's pretty intriguing! 😄 There's definitely some spicy potential there, especially with the added drama of the intimacy coordinator. I'm totally up for writing about it! Just a heads up though, in this fanfic, Alan will obviously be single—gotta keep it true to the storyline! 😅 Let's dive into this steamy adventure! 🌟
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As you stood on set, rehearsing yet another intimate scene with Alan Rickman, the weight of nervousness settled heavily on your shoulders. Despite being a sought-after young actress in Hollywood, the prospect of filming such scenes still made your heart race with apprehension.
Alan's presence only added to your anxiety, his baritone voice sending shivers down your spine as he delivered his lines with effortless charm. His hooked nose and piercing gaze seemed to see right through you, adding to the intensity of the moment.
But it wasn't Alan that was causing you the most stress today. No, it was the intimacy coordinator, whose constant meddling was making a challenging situation even more difficult than it needed to be. Their insistence on perfection, their nitpicking over every little detail, was starting to wear on your nerves, and you could see the frustration mirrored in Alan's eyes as well.
"Cut! That's not quite right, let's try it again from the top," the intimacy coordinator called out, their voice tinged with dissatisfaction.
You exchanged a weary glance with Alan, both of you silently acknowledging the absurdity of the situation. It was just a scene, after all, nothing more than a performance meant to entertain audiences. But the intimacy coordinator seemed determined to turn it into something far more complicated than it needed to be.
As you prepared to run through the scene once again, you couldn't help but feel a twinge of irritation at the intimacy coordinator's overbearing presence. Surely, there had to be a better way to approach these intimate scenes without subjecting you and Alan to such unnecessary stress and scrutiny.
But as you locked eyes with Alan, a silent understanding passed between you. No matter what challenges you faced, you were in this together, united in your determination to deliver a compelling performance despite the obstacles in your path.
With a shared nod of determination, you straightened up and turned away from Alan, returning to your mark to continue the rehearsal from the beginning. As you slipped into the role of Emily, your heart raced with anticipation, the script unfolding in your mind as you prepared to embody the character's emotions and desires.
As the intimacy coordinator gave the cue to continue the rehearsal, Alan pulled you close, his presence commanding and magnetic as he stepped into the role of Thomas. His baritone voice washed over you like a velvet caress, sending a shiver of excitement down your spine as he delivered his lines with effortless intensity.
"Emily," Alan's voice rumbled, his breath hot against your neck as he spoke his lines. "I can't deny what I feel for you any longer. I know it's wrong, but I can't help but want you, crave you, with every fiber of my being."
Your pulse quickened at Alan's words, your character's internal struggle mirroring your own as you tried to resist the overwhelming temptation he presented. "Thomas, please," you protested weakly, your voice trembling with desire. "You're my boyfriend's father. We can't do this."
But Alan's character, consumed by his own desires, refused to be swayed by your protests. With a hungry growl, he pulled you into his arms, his lips trailing kisses along your neck as he whispered words of passion and longing.
"I don't care about any of that," Alan's character declared, his voice thick with desire. "All I want is you, Emily. I want to feel you beneath me, surrendering to the pleasure only I can give you. Come to me, my darling, and let me show you the ecstasy that awaits us."
As Alan's lips found yours in a fierce kiss, you melted into him just as the script dictated. His touch ignited a fire within you, sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body as you surrendered to the intensity of the moment as he pulls you into bed with him.
But before you could lose yourself completely in the passion of the scene, the intimacy coordinator interrupted once again, their voice cutting through the air with frustrating precision.
"Cut! That's not quite right," they declared, their tone laced with disappointment. "We need more passion, more intensity. I'm just not feeling it."
Alan broke away from the kiss with a frustrated groan, rolling away from you with a scowl marring his handsome features. "Bloody hell," he muttered under his breath, running a hand through his hair in frustration.
You sighed irritably, sitting on the edge of the bed as you exchanged a weary glance with Alan. This wasn't the first time the intimacy coordinator had interrupted the scene, and you were beginning to wonder if they would ever be satisfied.
Alan got up from the bed, his irritation evident in the set of his shoulders as he made his way over to the intimacy coordinator. "What's the problem now?" he demanded, his voice tinged with annoyance.
The intimacy coordinator sighed, running a hand through their hair in frustration. "It's just not working, Alan," they explained, their tone apologetic. "There's a lack of passion, a lack of chemistry between you and [Your Name]. We need to capture that raw intensity, that burning desire that drives your characters together."
Alan's expression darkened at the criticism, but he remained composed as he listened to the coordinator's feedback. After a moment of silence, he nodded in resignation. "Fine," he conceded, his voice tight with frustration. "We'll try it again tomorrow."
With that, the intimacy coordinator dismissed you both for the rest of the day, warning you that you would need to return to the set early tomorrow morning for one last rehearsal before recording the scene.
Alan sighed irritably as the coordinator walked away, his frustration evident in every line of his body. But as he turned to leave, you called out to him, hesitating for a moment before speaking.
"Alan, wait," you said, your voice hesitant. "What if we... rehearsed the scene again, but this time at the hotel? Maybe if we had some privacy, we could really get into the characters and find that chemistry the coordinator is looking for."
Alan looked at you, his expression softening at your suggestion. He considered it for a moment before nodding in agreement. "That might not be a bad idea," he admitted, a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "We could use the extra practice before tomorrow."
You smiled in relief, grateful for Alan's willingness to go the extra mile to ensure the scene was a success. "Great," you said, your voice brightening with enthusiasm. "My hotel room is just down the hall. We can rehearse there if you don't mind."
Alan chuckled softly, a twinkle of amusement in his eyes. "I don't mind at all," he replied, his tone warm with affection. "Lead the way, [Your Name]. Let's make sure we nail this scene tomorrow."
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As the taxi wound its way through the bustling streets of Rome, you couldn't help but marvel at the beauty of the city. The ancient architecture, the winding cobblestone streets, the vibrant colors of the bustling markets – it was a feast for the senses, and you found yourself itching to explore every corner of it.
Beside you, Alan sat in quiet contemplation, his gaze fixed on the passing scenery outside the window. His baritone voice broke the silence as he spoke, his British accent lending a cultured elegance to his words.
"Quite a stunning city, isn't it?" he remarked, his tone thoughtful. "There's a certain timeless quality to Rome that I find quite captivating. It's as if every corner holds a piece of history, just waiting to be discovered."
You nodded in agreement, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "Absolutely," you replied, your voice filled with enthusiasm. "I can't wait to take a stroll through the streets and soak in the atmosphere. There's so much to see and experience here."
As the conversation turned to your characters and the upcoming scene, you found yourself drawn into a lively discussion with Alan, his insights and observations adding depth to your understanding of the roles you were portraying. His passion for the craft of acting was evident in every word he spoke, and you couldn't help but feel inspired by his dedication to his craft.
Before you knew it, the taxi had arrived at the hotel, and Alan made a point of paying the driver before you could even reach for your wallet. You thanked him with a grateful smile, feeling a warm glow of appreciation for his thoughtful gesture.
As you made your way up to your floor, Alan paused outside his room, turning to face you with a sheepish smile. "I'll just leave a few things in my room before heading to yours," he explained, his tone casual. "I'll meet you there in a few minutes, alright?"
You nodded in understanding, feeling a flutter of anticipation in your chest at the thought of being alone with Alan in the privacy of your hotel room. "Sounds good," you replied, your voice tinged with excitement. "I'll see you in a bit."
With that, you watched as Alan disappeared into his room, his figure disappearing behind the closed door. Taking a deep breath to steady your nerves, you made your way to the end of the hallway, your heart racing with anticipation for what was to come.
Once inside your hotel room, you took a moment to gather your thoughts, the excitement of the day still coursing through your veins. You couldn't believe you were about to rehearse an intimate scene with Alan Rickman of all people, and in the privacy of your own hotel room, no less.
As you paced nervously around the room, your mind raced with a million different thoughts and emotions. What if you messed up the scene? What if you couldn't find the chemistry the intimacy coordinator was looking for? What if Alan thought you were a terrible actress?
But as you took a deep breath and reminded yourself to stay calm, you pushed aside your doubts and fears, focusing instead on the task at hand. You were a professional actress, after all, and you had worked hard to earn your place in the industry. You wouldn't let a little nervousness stand in the way of giving your best performance.
Just then, there was a soft knock on the door, and your heart leaped into your throat as you realized that Alan had arrived. With trembling hands, you made your way to the door, your pulse racing with anticipation as you prepared to face him.
As you opened the door, your breath caught in your throat at the sight of Alan standing before you, his expression warm and welcoming. "Hello, [Your Name]," he greeted you, his voice soft with affection. "May I come in?"
You nodded eagerly, stepping aside to let him enter the room. "Of course," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper as you ushered him inside.
As Alan stepped into the room, you couldn't help but notice the way his eyes swept over your surroundings, taking in every detail with a keen eye for observation. His hooked nose twitched in amusement as he spotted the plush armchair by the window, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips.
"What a lovely room you have," he remarked, his tone genuine. "It's so cozy and inviting. And that view of the city is simply breathtaking."
You blushed at the compliment, feeling a surge of pride at the thought of sharing your temporary home with someone as distinguished as Alan Rickman. "Thank you," you replied, your voice tinged with gratitude. "I'm glad you like it."
As you settled into the room, the two of you fell into an easy conversation, discussing your characters and the upcoming scene with a shared sense of excitement and anticipation. Alan's insights and observations were invaluable, and you found yourself hanging on his every word as he shared his thoughts on the characters' motivations and desires.
As you and Alan delved deeper into the characters' motivations and desires, you found yourselves growing more and more immersed in the world of Emily and Thomas. Alan's insights into Thomas's complex psyche were invaluable, and you couldn't help but admire his dedication to bringing the character to life.
But as the conversation turned to the intimate scene you were about to rehearse, a nervous flutter took root in the pit of your stomach. Despite your best efforts to remain composed, the prospect of acting out such a personal and vulnerable moment with Alan was enough to make your heart race with apprehension.
With a shared glance of determination, you and Alan finally decided to dive into the rehearsal, determined to give it your all. But as you began to act out the scene, a wave of awkwardness washed over you, the absence of the cameras, intimacy coordinator, and other people from the set leaving you feeling exposed and vulnerable.
Without the safety net of the set and its crew, the scene took on a whole new level of intimacy, almost as if it were real. As Alan leaned in to deliver Thomas's lines with his signature baritone voice, you couldn't help but feel a pang of desire stir deep within you, a feeling you quickly brushed aside in favor of focusing on the scene.
But as Alan continued to seduce you with his words and gestures, you found yourself getting lost in the intensity of the moment, your resistance crumbling under the weight of his passion.
"I don't care about any of that," Alan's voice rumbled, his tone thick with desire as he pulled you closer to him, "All I want is you, Emily. I want to feel you beneath me, surrendering to the pleasure only I can give you. Come to me, my darling, and let me show you the ecstasy that awaits us."
Your heart pounded in your chest as you melted against him, your fingers tangling in his shirt as you eagerly pulled him closer. With a gasp of desire, you surrendered to the overwhelming passion that burned between you, your body aflame with longing for him.
Alan's touch ignited a fire within you, his hands tracing every curve and contour of your body with a skill that left you trembling with desire. As he guided you to the bed, his lips never leaving yours, you couldn't help but lose yourself in the heat of the moment, the lines between reality and fiction blurring into nothingness.
As you opened the buttons on Alan's shirt, your fingers trembling with anticipation, you felt a surge of excitement coursing through your veins. The script called for this moment, but the intensity of the scene, combined with the raw chemistry between you and Alan, left you feeling dizzy with desire.
Alan's lips trailed hot kisses along your neck, his breath sending shivers down your spine as he whispered words of passion and longing. But as you felt the warmth of his skin under your touch, you couldn't resist the temptation to deviate from the script, to indulge in the raw desire burning between you.
With a boldness you didn't know you possessed, you allowed your hands to roam freely over Alan's chest, tracing the contours of his muscles with a hunger that bordered on obsession. His skin was warm and smooth beneath your fingertips, a stark contrast to the cool air of the room, and you found yourself lost in the sensation of him beneath your touch.
But as Alan stood up to look at you, his eyes dark with desire, you felt a blush creeping up your cheeks at the realization of what you had done. Pushing his hands away, you stammered out an apology, your voice trembling with embarrassment as you tried to regain your composure.
"I-I'm sorry, Alan," you murmured, your gaze falling to the floor in shame. "I don't know what came over me. I got carried away, and I didn't mean to go off script like that."
Alan's expression softened as he reached out to gently lift your chin, his eyes searching yours with a tenderness that took your breath away. "It's alright, love," he reassured you, his voice a soothing balm to your frazzled nerves. "I must admit, I quite enjoyed your improvisation. You're a natural, [Your Name]."
The warmth of his praise washed over you like a wave, easing the tension in your shoulders as you met his gaze with a hesitant smile. "Th-thank you, Alan," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. "I just... I got caught up in the moment, I suppose."
Alan chuckled softly, the sound like music to your ears as he pulled you into his arms, his embrace warm and comforting. "We all get carried away sometimes, my dear," he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear in a tantalizing caress. "But I must say, I quite enjoyed where your improvisation took us."
As Alan's lips brushed against your ear, sending a shiver down your spine, you caught your breath at the sudden rush of desire that surged through you. His warm breath tickled your skin, igniting a fire within you that threatened to consume you entirely. With a soft gasp, you instinctively leaned into his touch, craving more of the intoxicating sensation he elicited with just a simple caress.
"Alan," you murmured his name, the sound barely audible over the pounding of your heart. But before you could say anything more, Alan seemed to snap back to reality, cursing softly under his breath as he pulled away from you, his expression a mixture of frustration and apology.
"I'm sorry," he apologized, his voice rough with emotion as he ran a hand through his hair, his eyes clouded with self-reproach. "I didn't mean to... I shouldn't have..."
You watched him with a mixture of sympathy and concern, reaching out to gently touch his arm in a gesture of comfort. "It's okay, Alan," you reassured him, your voice soft and understanding. "We were both caught up in the moment. You were just improvising, like I did earlier."
Alan looked at you, his eyes searching yours for a moment before nodding in agreement. "Yes, you're right," he conceded, his voice tinged with uncertainty. "I was improvising. I suppose I just got carried away."
You offered him a reassuring smile, hoping to ease the tension that hung heavy in the air between you. "We can start again if you want," you suggested, your voice gentle and encouraging. "Take a moment to collect yourself, and we can go through the scene again."
Alan nodded, taking a deep breath to steady himself before meeting your gaze with a determined look. "Yes, let's do that," he agreed, his voice firm with resolve. "I won't let my... momentary lapse affect our performance. We're professionals, after all."
With that, the two of you launched back into the scene, picking up where you left off with renewed focus and determination. As Thomas continued to seduce Emily, his words laced with desire and longing, you found yourself drawn into the intensity of the moment, your resistance crumbling under the weight of his passion.
But this time, when Thomas leaned in to kiss Emily, the kiss was different. It was long, intense, filled with a raw desire that threatened to consume them both. As Alan pulled you closer, his lips claiming yours with a fierce urgency, you couldn't help but lose yourself in the heat of the moment, the lines between fiction and reality blurring into nothingness.
Your hands tangled in his hair, pulling him closer as you deepened the kiss, your bodies pressed together in a desperate embrace. With each passing moment, the intensity of the scene grew, fueled by the undeniable chemistry that burned between you.
But as the kiss finally broke, leaving you both breathless and wanting more, you reminded yourself that it was just improvisation, just a means to make the scene as real as possible for filming. And yet, deep down, you couldn't deny the thrill that coursed through you at the thought of what had just transpired between you and Alan.
As you caught your breath, you exchanged a knowing glance with Alan, a silent acknowledgment passing between you. In that moment, you both understood that what had just happened was more than just acting – it was a connection, a spark of passion that transcended the boundaries of the scene.
As Alan took a deep breath, his gaze searching yours with a mix of uncertainty and desire, you felt a surge of anticipation coursing through your veins. The air crackled with tension between you.
But before you could utter a word, Alan's voice cut through the silence, his tone hesitant yet determined. "Do you... want me to leave?" he asked, his baritone voice sending shivers down your spine as he awaited your answer.
You met his gaze with a steady look, your heart racing with a mixture of nerves and longing. "No," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. "I don't want you to leave, Alan. I want... this. I want you."
The admission hung between you like a weight, the air thick with anticipation as you waited for Alan's response. For a moment, he seemed to hesitate, his expression clouded with uncertainty as he processed your words.
But then, with a sudden surge of determination, Alan stepped closer to you, his gaze locking onto yours with unwavering intensity. "Shit," he breathed, his voice thick with desire. "You want this... you want me?"
You nodded, your heart pounding in your chest as you met his gaze with unbridled longing. "Yes," you confessed, your voice barely a whisper. "I want this, Al. I want you."
Alan's eyes darkened with desire as he reached out to cup your face in his hands, his touch sending electric currents racing through your veins. "God, [Your Name]," he murmured, his voice husky with need. "I want you too. More than you can possibly imagine."
With that, Alan wasted no time in closing the distance between you, his lips crashing against yours in a fierce, passionate kiss. It was like a dam had burst, releasing the pent-up desire that had been simmering between you since the moment you met.
His hands roamed over your body with a hunger that left you breathless, his touch igniting a fire within you that threatened to consume you entirely. With each caress, each kiss, the intensity of your desire grew, until you were both lost in a whirlwind of passion and ecstasy.
As Alan pressed you against the wall, his body flush against yours, you felt a surge of heat pooling between your legs, aching to be touched, to be claimed by him completely. His hands trailed down your body, leaving a trail of fire in their wake as he explored every inch of you with a reverence that took your breath away.
"I've wanted this for so long," Alan confessed, his voice rough with emotion as he peppered kisses along your neck, his breath hot against your skin. "To feel you beneath me, to taste every inch of you, to lose myself in the depths of your desire."
You whimpered in response, your nails digging into his back as you pulled him closer, craving more of the intoxicating sensation he elicited with just a simple touch. "Yes, Al," you gasped, your voice thick with desire. "I want you. I need you. Please, don't stop."
With a growl of desire, Alan lifted you into his arms, carrying you towards the bed with a fierce determination that left you weak with longing. As he laid you down on the soft mattress, he trailed kisses along your collarbone, his hands deftly removing your clothes with a hunger that left you trembling with anticipation.
And as you stood naked in front of him, Alan stopped to admire you, his gaze intense and focused as if you were a masterpiece hanging in a gallery. Your cheeks flushed with embarrassment under his scrutiny, feeling like you were under a microscope, laid bare for his inspection.
You couldn't help but feel a surge of excitement mixed with nervousness, knowing that this was the moment you had been waiting for, the culmination of the tension that had been building between you since the rehearsal began. And yet, as Alan's eyes roamed over your body, taking in every curve and contour with a hunger that left you breathless, you couldn't help but feel a twinge of self-consciousness.
After all, this was Alan Rickman, the legendary British actor whose performances you had admired for years. To have him look at you with such intensity, as if you were the only thing that mattered in the world, was both exhilarating and terrifying at the same time.
But as Alan questioned once again if you wanted him to leave, giving you one last chance to send him away, you found yourself shaking your head in denial, your voice barely above a whisper as you pleaded with him to stay.
"No, Alan," you murmured, your voice trembling with desire. "I don't want you to leave. I want you... I need you."
Alan's lips curled into a wicked grin at your words, a glint of mischief dancing in his eyes as he leaned in closer, his larger, thicker body swallowing yours in a sea of desire. With a low chuckle, he trailed kisses down your collarbone, his lips teasingly close to the swell of your breasts, but never quite touching.
"You're sure about that, love?" he asked, his voice husky with desire. "This is your last chance to change your mind. Once we start, there's no going back."
But you shook your head adamantly, the need for him burning hot and fierce in your veins. "I'm sure, Alan," you insisted, your voice thick with desire. "I want you. I need you. Please, don't make me wait any longer."
With a satisfied smile playing on his lips, Alan finally took one of your breasts in his mouth, his tongue swirling around the sensitive peak as he suckled on it with a hunger that left you gasping for air. But he didn't stop there. Oh no, Alan's exploration of your body was just beginning.
As his lips worked their magic on your breast, his fingers trailed down your trembling form, leaving a trail of fire in their wake as they traced the contours of your body with a feather-light touch. With a wicked grin, he teased your inner thighs, his touch tantalizingly close to your throbbing center but never quite reaching it.
You moaned his name, dragging out the syllables in a desperate plea for more, but Alan, ever the tease, denied you, reminding you in his husky baritone voice that you were still in character, that this was just a rehearsal. "Patience, my dear Emily," he murmured against your skin, his breath hot against your ear. "We mustn't break character, after all."
You whimpered in frustration, your nails digging into his back as you arched into his touch, craving more of the exquisite pleasure he was capable of giving you. But Alan only chuckled in amusement, his fingers continuing their wicked dance along your trembling form as he prepared you for what was to come.
"You're so eager, my sweet Emily," he teased, his voice thick with desire. "But remember, we must maintain the illusion, mustn't we? I am Thomas, not Alan. And you, my dear, are my forbidden desire, the object of my relentless passion."
With a low growl of frustration, you nodded in understanding, your body thrumming with anticipation as you surrendered to the intensity of the moment. "Yes, Thomas," you gasped, your voice thick with desire. "Forgive me, I got carried away. But please, I need you. I need to feel you inside me, filling me up with your desire."
Alan's lips curled into a wicked grin at your words, his eyes dark with desire as he finally relented, his fingers slipping between your slick folds with a hunger that left you trembling with need. With a soft gasp, you arched into his touch, craving more of the exquisite pleasure he was capable of giving you.
But Alan only chuckled in amusement, his eyes twinkling with mischief as he teased you with a slow, torturous pace that left you begging for more. "So eager, my dear," he murmured, his voice thick with desire. "But patience is a virtue, is it not? We have all the time in the world to explore each other's desires."
You whimpered in frustration, your hips bucking against his hand as you sought more of the intoxicating pleasure he was capable of giving you. But Alan only chuckled in amusement, his fingers continuing their wicked dance along your trembling form as he teased you with the promise of ecstasy just out of reach.
With a low growl of frustration, you pleaded with him, your voice thick with desire. "Please, Thomas," you gasped, your body thrumming with need. "I can't take it anymore. I need you. I need you to fill me up, to make me yours completely."
Alan's eyes darkened with desire at your words, his resolve finally crumbling as he gave in to the overwhelming passion that burned between you. With a fierce growl, he shed his remaining clothes, his thick cock springing free from its confines as he positioned himself between your trembling thighs.
With a wicked grin, he teased your entrance with the tip of his cock, his eyes locked with yours in a silent exchange of longing and desire. And then, with a low groan of pleasure, he surged forward, burying himself deep inside you with a single, powerful thrust.
You cried out in ecstasy as he filled you completely, his cock stretching you to the limit as he claimed you as his own. With each powerful thrust, he drove deeper into you, his pace relentless and unyielding as he rode you towards the edge of oblivion.
"Fuck, [Your Name]," he groaned, his voice thick with desire. "You feel so damn good, baby. I swear, I could spend eternity buried deep inside you and never want for anything else."
You moaned in response, your nails digging into his back as you clung to him desperately, craving more of the intense pleasure he was giving you. With each powerful thrust, he drove you closer to the edge, the pleasure building to a crescendo that threatened to consume you both.
As you watched Alan lost in pleasure, you couldn't help but marvel at how utterly beautiful he looked in that moment. His eyes closed in ecstasy, his lips parted in a chorus of moans that sent shivers down your spine. God, his baritone voice, usually so controlled and precise, was now a symphony of pleasure, filling the room with a melody that echoed in your ears.
You couldn't resist the overwhelming desire that consumed you as you watched him, your own need for pleasure driving you to touch yourself in a desperate attempt to find release. With one hand teasing your breasts, rolling your hardened nipples between your fingers, and the other slipping between your slick folds, you sought to heighten the pleasure coursing through your body.
Alan's eyes fluttered open to catch you in the act, his gaze darkening with desire as he watched you pleasure yourself while he moved inside you. "Fuck, [Your Name]," he groaned, his voice thick with lust. "You're so fucking hot, playing with yourself like that while I'm buried deep inside you."
His words sent a jolt of excitement coursing through you, only intensifying the pleasure building within you. With a wicked grin, you met his gaze head-on, relishing in the power you held over him in that moment.
"You like watching me, Alan?" you teased, your voice dripping with seduction. "Does it turn you on, knowing that you're the one driving me wild with desire? Knowing that I can't get enough of you, even when you're buried deep inside me?"
Alan's breath hitched at your words, his hips stuttering momentarily in their rhythm as he struggled to maintain control. "Fuck, yes," he gasped, his voice thick with desire. "You're so fucking sexy, [Your Name]. I could watch you touch yourself all day, baby."
With renewed determination, you continued to pleasure yourself, your fingers working tirelessly to chase the elusive release that hovered just out of reach. Every stroke, every caress brought you closer to the edge, the pleasure building to a fever pitch that threatened to consume you entirely.
But just as you felt yourself on the brink of ecstasy, Alan's voice cut through the haze of pleasure, his tone rough with desperation. "Stop," he commanded, his voice thick with need. "I can't... I can't hold back much longer if you keep doing that."
You paused momentarily, torn between the desire to obey his command and the overwhelming need for release that pulsed through your veins. But as you looked into Alan's eyes, dark with desire and pleading with need, you knew that you had to do as he asked.
With a reluctant sigh, you removed your hand from your throbbing center, a whimper of frustration escaping your lips as you denied yourself the pleasure you so desperately craved. But as you watched Alan, his expression contorted in ecstasy, you knew that it was worth it, knowing that you were the one driving him to the brink of climax.
But as Alan's fingers replaced yours, you gasped in surprise at the sudden change, a moan escaping your lips as his thick digits began to work their magic on your sensitive clit. His touch was rough yet gentle, sending jolts of pleasure coursing through your body as he continued to move inside you with a relentless pace.
You clung to him desperately, your nails digging into his back as you rode the waves of pleasure crashing over you. With each stroke of his fingers, you felt yourself edging closer and closer to the precipice, the intensity of the sensation threatening to overwhelm your senses entirely.
But just as you felt yourself teetering on the brink of ecstasy, Alan's voice cut through the haze of pleasure, his tone commanding yet desperate. "Cum for me, [Your Name]," he ordered, his voice thick with need. "I want to feel you cum all over my dick, baby. I want to feel you tremble beneath me as you surrender to the pleasure only I can give you."
His words sent a surge of excitement coursing through you, your body responding eagerly to his command as you clung to him, desperate for release. With a primal growl of desire, you let yourself go, surrendering to the overwhelming pleasure that consumed you entirely.
As you came undone in his arms, waves of ecstasy washing over you in a tidal wave of pleasure, you cried out his name, your voice a symphony of pleasure that echoed through the room. Alan's fingers continued their relentless assault on your clit, driving you higher and higher towards the edge until you were teetering on the brink of oblivion.
And then, with one final thrust of his hips, Alan pushed you over the edge, sending you spiraling into the abyss of ecstasy. Your body convulsed with pleasure as you came apart in his arms, every nerve ending ablaze with the intensity of the sensation coursing through you.
"Fuck, yes," Alan groaned, his voice thick with desire as he felt you tremble beneath him. "That's it, baby. Cum for me. Give me everything you've got."
As you rode out the waves of pleasure crashing over you, Alan continued to move inside you with a relentless pace, his own release looming ever closer on the horizon. But just as he felt himself on the brink of climax, he knew that he couldn't hold back any longer.
With a desperate groan of pleasure, Alan pulled out of you, his thick cock glistening with your combined juices as he stroked himself with a feverish urgency.
And as you watched Alan, mesmerized by the sight before you, you couldn't help but feel a surge of desire coursing through your veins. Here was Alan Rickman, the legendary actor and object of your fantasies, pleasuring himself with an urgency that left you breathless. It was like something out of a dream, and yet, here you were, living it.
With each stroke of his hand, Alan's expression twisted in pleasure, his baritone voice filling the room with a chorus of moans that sent shivers down your spine. His hooked nose twitched in arousal, a bead of sweat forming on his brow as he neared the precipice of ecstasy.
And then, with a primal growl of pleasure, Alan finally succumbed to the overwhelming sensation coursing through him, his release painting the sheets in a sticky mess as he groaned in satisfaction. A few errant spurts landed on your thighs, leaving a trail of warmth in their wake as Alan collapsed next to you, his chest heaving with exertion.
You couldn't help but laugh at the sight, the absurdity of the situation hitting you like a ton of bricks. Here you were, lying naked in bed with Alan Rickman, after an impromptu rehearsal that had taken a decidedly unexpected turn. It was like something out of a cheesy romance novel, and yet, it was undeniably real.
"Well, that was certainly... unexpected," Alan remarked, his voice thick with amusement as he wiped a stray bead of sweat from his brow. "I must say, [Your Name], you certainly know how to keep things interesting."
You chuckled in response, feeling a surge of warmth spreading through your chest at his words. "I aim to please, Al," you replied, your voice laced with mischief. "But I must say, you're not too bad yourself. Who knew you had such hidden talents?"
Alan laughed, the sound rich and melodious as it filled the room. "Oh, I have many talents, my dear," he teased, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "But I must say, this is certainly a first for me. Rehearsing an intimate scene with a beautiful actress in a hotel room? It's like something out of a bad porno."
You couldn't help but laugh at the comparison, the absurdity of the situation not lost on you. "Well, we did get a few scenes wrong," you joked back, your voice thick with amusement. "I suppose we'll just have to rehearse them again. Maybe next time we'll get it right."
Alan chuckled in agreement, his laughter mingling with yours in a harmonious symphony of sound. "Yes, perhaps we should," he agreed, his voice warm with affection. "But for now, I think we deserve a little break. What do you say we order some room service and relax for a bit?"
You nodded eagerly, feeling a surge of contentment washing over you at the thought of spending more time with Alan. "That sounds perfect," you replied, your voice tinged with excitement. "I could use a little downtime after all that... rehearsal."
With a shared smile, the two of you settled back against the pillows, basking in the afterglow of your passionate encounter. As you drifted off to sleep in each other's arms, you couldn't help but feel a sense of peace settle over you, knowing that whatever the future held, you would always have this moment, this connection with Alan Rickman.
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eeunoia · 11 hours
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ENHYPEN Mini Series
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ENHYPEN as Taylor Swifts Song
THE WAY I LOVED YOU
synopsis: they said in our life, there will be that one love that is so intense and passionate. the type of love that has good and bad days on it, but still feel home for you. the type of love that makes you crazy. so many emotions but for only one person. that’s park sunghoon for you.
pairings: park sunghoon x reader
word count: 12k.
warnings: toxic relationship, angst, sunghoon being a redflag. (let me know if i missed some)
note: i got totally carried away with this one and honestly i’m totally satisfied on how i wrote this. i’m currently on my psh phase so i’m totally crazy for him lol anyway, i hope you enjoy this fic and please please please leave your thoughts on replies or send me some ask. it helps so much to keep me writing more. ily & stay safe!
eeunoia 2024 © all rights reserved.
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“Where are you going?” you asked while pulling the sheet up to your chest, watching your boyfriend scurrying to gather his things as he put his clothes on.
He threw you a short glance, hair still disheveled from the heated session you two just shared and went back on to what he was doing.
“Band practice.” he shortly replied.
You gulped, spacing out after his response. Its not that this is the first time he did this. Having sex with you and leave once his bandmates calls him out for practice. You always think that it was his priority over his relationship with you.
His steps are quick when he approach and kissed the top of your head like as if it will do any better.
“I'll see you later, okay?” and then turned his back to go on his way without sending you another look.
After hearing the sound of the door closing and locks clicking, you laid back on your shared bed and stared right at the ceiling. Mind occupied by a lot of thoughts and slowly feeling the energy finally draining out of you.
You have been dating Park Sunghoon for exactly three years now. He's the hot drummer of the band called PARADOX. Handsome, talented and very passionate man. He sure love what he does the most, music.
People who knows the two of you may say that your relationship with him is pretty sturdy. Despite the scruffles and misunderstanding along the side, the memories and bond you built together was not easy to break.
They'll also probably mention how the two of you are an odd combination. You, being someone who finished college to have a righteous degree and works as a fine finance manager in a big company and Sunghoon, being the drummer of a said band.
Its not that being in a band and making music is a bad occupation, its just compared to yours, his is just more unstable. Yes, he is good. His band is really good and somehow makes it to places to share their music, but at some point it just doesn't fit.
Sometimes, they still wonder how the two of you works it out. How you can handle the mess and the outgoing side of Park Sunghoon, notwithstanding the fact of being someone who loves peace and have a priggish personality.
“Are you still playing in that band?” this are the common question your Father loves to throw during dinners whenever you take Sunghoon home with you.
You've always know how things ends up so you are expeditious on getting in between.
“Dad.” you looked at him with a pleading eyes, hoping he'll cooperate tonight and let you guys have a peaceful dinner just for once.
Sunghoon tensed beside you as his hold over his utensils tighten, as well as his jaw. It was already hard to swallow food now that he's inside your home having dinner with your parents and now your Dad is again belittling him.
“Yes, sir.” he answered.
The usual disappointing and downgrading look on his face makes Sunghoon feels awful. During this time is when he'll surely never get used to. It makes him realize that no matter how good he do, no matter how great his band became, he will never be someone so worthy in the eyes of your Father.
“And for how long will you plan to do this nonsense?” he was not holding back at all. His wife, your Mom, beside him gently reaches for his arm, trying to stop him from saying more.
Sunghoon clenched his jaw, “Making music is not nonsense. We are doing well right now, sir.”
The way he says those words just makes your Father even more pissed at him. He always hates how he was so confident and prideful. The way he stands whenever he greets him after arriving at your home is giving off as someone imperious.
He scoffed humorless, “And for how long? I've already told you that there's no future in that dream of yours.”
“Dad!” your voice raised because you couldn't handle what he's saying right now.
Sunghoon stands abruptly, making a dragging sound from the chair he was occupying. He balled his fist and just stormed outside of your house. You stood and stared at your Dad with a look of dispair in your eyes. He didn't back down and just gave you this knowing look.
“I asked you to stop doing that.”
“And I already told you to leave that boy countless times, y/n. Stop wasting your time with him!” he strictly said.
“Never.” and with that you turned your feet to start coming after your boyfriend.
You saw him a few blocks away walking towards where he parked his motorcycle. With quick steps, you try to catch up on him.
“Sunghoon!” you screamed, but he didn't even looked back on you.
With gritted teeth, you hurried your steps even more and right on time that he ride his motorcycle, you grabbed him by his arm.
“Why are you not stopping!” you yelled, tears brimming your eyes.
He glanced at you and that's when you saw his bloodshot eyes. Your boyfriend never cries. His playful demeanor never showed his weak side, even with you. Maybe your father was right. He is someone full of pride and sometimes arrogant, but you love him. And he loves you.
“I told you already that I don't want to come! But you forced me anyway!” he yelled, making you flinch a little.
It was really your fault because you are so persistent on making the things between your Dad and him to work despite knowing the outcome of this visit to your parent's house.
“He will never see me worthy of you. You are always so hard to reach for me...” his tone low that made your heart crack. You've never seen him like this before.
His eyes darken as he teared his gaze away, shoving your hold off from his arm. You started to panic and watch how he grabs the handle of his vehicle then started the engine.
“W-What are you doing? Are you leaving m-me?” you asked in a broken tone that made him falter a bit, but the pain from the scene of how your father belittled him was stronger.
Rain starts pouring, but you stood your ground. Didn't even bothered that you are starting to get soaked by the now pouring rain.
“P-Please, don't do this.” you begged and Sunghoon stared at you and maybe it was the rain? Or the cold breeze surrounding you two, but he seems so cold and distant. It breaks you slowly.
“I l-love you so much.” you gulped getting rid of the lump on your throat. “P-Please.”
But he starts droving off. Your heart sank and quickly tries to run after him. Its stupid because there's no way to catch up just by running, but your mind was too clouded to even think straight.
The rain poured even harder and your knees felt weak from running too much. You stopped and cries even harder, heart feeling so broken. You don't feel bothered by the cold at all and all you can think of is how your chest is hurting so bad. You felt slightly suffocated from crying so hard, giving you a hard time to breath.
A roaring sound of an engine makes you lift your head and a string of hope ignites when you saw lights emitting from a vehicle that is driving near you.
Your lips shakes when you saw the familiar motorcycle stopping beside you, Sunghoon's all drenched like you when he turned his head at your side.
“Your father,” he starts and you shake your head sideways trying to stop him, but he continued. “he may hate me to his bones. He may resent me and never want me for you.” one of his hand lets go from the handle and reach over your hand.
“But I love you.” he said firmly that made you tear up even more. “I love you so fucking much that it hurts.” he pursed his lips hardly, jaw clenching hard as he tries to hide his emotions.
You cried and lets go from his hand to cup his face. Both feeling so cold from the nonstop rain but the warmth you two are giving each were enough for you. You leaned in connecting your lips before pulling away to stare at his eyes.
“I don't care about what he thinks. I only want you and no one else.”
He smirks then starts handing you a helmet.
“Then hop on, pretty. We're going to get sick if we stay here longer.”
And without a hint of hesitation, you wore the helmet and hopped on his motorbike. Sunghoon pulls your arm so you can hug him from behind.
“Hold on tight and don't let go.”
“Never.”
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“Sunghoon, I told you already I'm still at the office. I can't be out until before 9pm.” your elbow rests over your desk as you try and massage your temple to ease your aching head.
“But our gig will start at eight pm, y/n. You said you'll watch.” he sounded so upset.
Normally, you will hurry yourself to go attend his gig but today was a rough day for you as well. Too many office works are lined up for you, workload piled up that you don't even know where to start. You know how much it means for Sunghoon having you to be there for him. But today's just so draining. And sometimes you kind of feel like you were always there for him but when will he be there for you?
“Sunghoon,” you draw in a heavy breath, calming yourself down to prevent saying anything that can spoil his mood. That’s the last thing you want to do if he have a gig.
“It’s just unexpctedly a very busy day. I need to finish all these works on time—” he cuts you even before you can finish your sentence.
“Just say it if you want to spend time with that co-worker and stop making lame excuses, y/n.” the sarcasm that lurks over his tone caught you dumbfounded.
Your mouth hanged open, unable to even utter your response to this nonsense he’s trying to imply. He’s very unbelievable. You are very tired already, the workload’s too heavy and here he is doubting you. He still have the audacity of accusing you over things when all you want is for this day to be over so you can see him and rest.
Sunghoon’s naturally a jealous boyfriend. He’s very possessive of you to the point that sometimes it can be out of hand. His bad temper and jealous demeanor is not a good combo because he always ends up fucking up things and telling you things he didn’t mean at all.
“Baby, no. Of course not! I really want to watch your gig, you know that right? It’s just—”
“You will really choose that over me, aren’t you? Like as if people doesn’t think I was unworthy of you already. You just really need to prove more...” his monotonous tone are like knives straight to your heart.
“Don’t even go there. You know its not that.” your lips tremble along with your hands as the conversations starts to get more intense.
“Yeah, right. Have fun with your co-worker.” he mumbled with a bitter tone and ended the call right away.
You shut your eyes as you drop your phone to your desk wrecklessly before running your hand through your hair, messing it a bit. The silence occupying the almost empty building floor didn’t help from the aching of your head. He’s really just unbelievable.
And it’s even more unbelievable that you are still so in love with him despite the red flags he’s obviously showing you. It was too late for you to even realize that you are already packing your things to go and see your boyfriend’s gig. The mountain-like paperworks that were on your table caught your eyes and made you halt for a bit, but in the end you chose to turn the lights off and head out of your office. Off to see your sulking boyfriend.
When you arrived, it was their last song for the night. The traffic on the way made the suppose to be 20 minute travel an hour long drive. A relieved sigh made it to your lips while you walk towards their manager, your feet starts to stings from your high-heel.
“Y/n! I thought you couldn’t make it tonight? Sunghoon said.” he smiled warmly before giving you a friendly hug.
You tried your best to return his smile as your eyes roamed and trailed over to the stage. The spotlight that pointed over your boyfriend gave you the chance to have the perfect view of him playing passionately. A small string tugs inside your heart while watching him, eyes closed and letting himself be drawn by music.
When people ask you why you fell so hard for him, they probably won’t understand you unless they’ll be in your shoes themselves. These are the moment he shines the most. The moment you can clearly see the real him. His love for his passion and his smiles melts you from the inside and out. It was unexplainable. You love Sunghoon. You love him so dearly to the point your heart aches.
When he opens his eyes like as if he felt an intense eyes are watching him, he met yours. Those pretty eyes that looks at him with so much affection. The eyes that pretty much made him feel things no one else can. The eyes that can comfort him. His safe place, his solace and his other half. For Sunghoon, if music is his passion then you are the life that pushes him to chase it. His inspiration.
His eyes fixated over you and lips pursed into a pout, still sulking. That made you chuckle and mouthed, ‘I love you.’
Sunghoon’s lips lifts up before responding, ‘I love you too.’ that made your stomach churns and heart thumping like crazy. Somehow it made you feel at ease. Despite all the worries and trials, as long as you have him, you will manage.
Only you and him will understand the type of love you share with each other.
“Thank you so much for tonight everyone! And we are...” Heeseung, their lead vocalists stalls his words and glanced at his band-mates and in unison they leaned over the mics near them and said, “PARADOX.”
The crowd cheers and you can see how they truly enjoyed the whole show. A small, but proud smile made its way towards your lips. The boys did a short fan service while you stay at the side with their manager. Girls swarms around them, but you didn’t mind it. This isn’t new for you anymore and if you want a partner in this line of job, you should prepare yourself for crazy fangirls.
“I’m really glad you made it, y/n” your head snaps over to the side when their manager spoke. He gave you this sincere look on his face and some other kind of gaze you couldn’t identify.
He sports this plain white shirt and some jeans. Hair styled in a pretty basic style any boy could pull and then he stood there a little stiff. You gave him a smile and a clap over his shoulder.
“Of course, I want my boyfriend to know I’m always here for him.” you stated that made his smile falter for a bit. He was quick to pull it back up, nodding his head slowly like as if he was reminded of something.
“Right... Sunghoon.” he mumbled.
Your gaze remained at him, a little confused of his reaction. It bothered you a bit so you’re about to ask him what’s wrong when a pair of strong arms wrapped around your waist.
“Hi hotstuff.” Sunghoon’s voice sounded so seductive as he quickly leans for a heated kiss.
You squeals lightly and tries to pull off from him, but ends up giving in and showing everyone how you two devours each other’s faces. One of Sunghoon’s hand moved down to slightly grope your butt that made you moan a little over his lips. He smirks, mission accomplished for him.
He was greeted by your blushing cheeks once he pulled away, one hand still possessively resting over your waist to keep you close to him.
“H-Hello,” the impact of your latest stunt dawning you, making you feel so shy.
He smirks, fangs showing and good Lord, does he look even hotter.
“You came.” his tone indicates the joy to see you here and that just makes you feel so much better. He may not vocally thank you or tell you he appreciates it so much, but the way his eyes twinkle and shines was enough for you to know how he feels.
“Of course. My boyfriend is being sulky so I have no other choice.” the corner of your lips lifts up, taunting him.
He stares at your eyes before grinning even wider, “I’m not sulky.” he leans in again, couldn’t resist your lips after glancing at it for a second. After he placed a loving kiss, he leans away and went back on facing his friends.
You watch how he threw a short glance at their manager as well and it remained for a while before he direct his attention to some acquaintances that are greeting his band.
The night was long, as usual. This is pretty much what happens whenever he have gigs. You feel so tired, feet feels so painful that you are sure you grew blisters over it. Your eyelids felt so heavy as well, the long day finally kicking in. The boys are still loud and celebrating, but finally one called it a night.
All of you starts heading outside the bar they performed in. Sunghoon’s walking a few steps ahead of you, talking and goofing with his friends. You are silent, too tired to even listen or join on their conversation.
You were almost hit by the door when Sunghoon didn’t even remember to hold it for you. He was too busy talking to his band-mates and didn’t even noticed that the door almost slapped you on the face. Thankfully, an arm held it for you.
“Thank you, Riki.” you gave him a small smile.
You’ve been together with Sunghoon for a while now so that only means you’ve hanged out with his band countless times causing you to grew closer towards them. But for some reasons, Riki is the only one who is somehow felt awkward to be with. You cannot explain why, but there’s just something about him that leaves you nothing to say.
He didn’t smile or anything, just stared down to you using his intimidating eyes.
“No problem.” shivers ran to your spines because of his low voice. His eyes then moved from looking at your eyes towards your things you’re trying to juggle with your arms.
“Let me help you.” it was not a question and even before you can say something to politely reject his offer, his hands reaches over to help you carry your things.
“U-Uhm, thanks.” and your eyes drifted over him as he didn't spoke any words after that.
Riki walks you up to where your boyfriend’s car was parked. Sunghoon’s eyes finally caught you and you don’t even know what to tell him while you approach closer.
His strict eyes caught to your things being carried by Riki. When you are steps away from him, he approaches trying to keep a cool smile.
“Baby, you disappeared from behind me.” and he said that while eyes fixed at his bandmate.
“Well if you keep a close eye to your girlfriend, you might’ve noticed how she’s struggling carrying her stuff, hyung.” Riki didn’t even hesitate to say those words at him.
Sunghoon wasn’t happy about it and you can clearly see anger slowly rising through his face. He clicked his tongue at the side of his cheeks and was about to advance towards Riki, but you stopped him.
“Can we just go? It’s already late and I have work tomorrow.” you stared straight at his eyes.
They were arrogantly looking at you, but eventually softening in surrender. He sighs and grabbed your hand to intertwin your fingers before he nods silently. His head snapped over to his friend and he gave him this knowing look before opening the car’s door for you.
He retrieved your things from Riki and placed it neatly behind your car. Thankfully, he didn’t say anything anymore and just went inside his car afterwards. Riki went on his way as well, riding his motorbike that was parked not too far away.
Sunghoon starts his engine and both of you are silent. It was like that for the first few minutes of the drive, until he decides to break it.
“When did you even got close to Riki?” his tone sounds confused and at the same time implicating something.
You furrowed your brows and glanced at him, “He just helped me to carry my things—”
“Exactly! He doesn’t do that at all, y/n.” the way he said your name was with emphasis. Like telling you that its a serious matter for him. A big deal. But again, when did it never became a big deal when other boys gets involve with you?
“And? I’m his bandmate’s girlfriend. Isn’t it okay for him to help me?!” now, you can’t help but to feel upset about this because you are tired already and he’s making an argument just because Riki helped you.
“You’re just really clueless with your surroundings. You will never understand.” the way his grip tightens at the steering wheel and his jaw clenches caught your attention.
You wanted to just yell at him and point out how he’s being unreasonable and plain childish about this, but you are too drained. Its late already, you’re tired from the office, your feet hurts with this dumb heels and you feel sticky from all the travel you did just to get to their gig. Having an argument with him was the last thing you expected to have.
“Its not my fault that my boyfriend forgot about me and walks off.” you sighed and he was silent after hearing that from you.
“Can’t you just be thankful that he helped me and I didn’t broke an arm from carrying all those stuff?” this time, you tried to soften your tone as a sign of time-out from this nonsense argument he was trying to put up with.
You saw his grip softens and he released a heavy sigh. “Fine.” he glanced at you and his brows are not hardly furrowed anymore. His eyes softens as well. “I’m sorry, baby. Its not my intention to make you feel like I forgot you, I was just really excited.”
With pursed lips, you nodded your head and leaned in for a quick peck over his lips.
“I know. That’s why I didn’t spoil the mood. You were really great from a while ago.” you complimented him, finishing it with your warm smile.
Something warm caress his heart. This is one of the reasons why he can never let you go. Most people would’ve walked out on him or hate at him, but not you. Never.
You will always find a way to find the goodness in him. Even if 99 problematic things about him are presented in front of you, you’ll still find that 1 good thing about him.
You always know the perfect words to calm him down or make him feel better.
He reached over your hand that was resting over your thighs and took it over his lips for a soft kiss. His gaze never left your eyes.
“Thank you for today, really.” he sighs, trying to supply himself more oxygen as he feels like you’re taking his breaths away once again.
“I love you.”
A smile spreads across your face and your free hand stretched out towards him to cup his face. “I love you, Hoon.”
These are the moments you wanted to keep no matter what. Reasons why despite the hardships you go through with Sunghoon, you always manages to find a reason to stay.
But of course, there’s not always good times in your relationship. What else gives it spice other than petty arguments and very random fights with each other?
Months after, the band had another big gig and of course you went to support him like usual. To your surprise, they had a guest singer. Female singer to be exact. And the way she interacts with your boyfriend just can’t leave your mind. It’s bothering you.
“You two seems close.” the comment was short and your eyes watch how your boyfriend load his things inside his car while you rest your back beside it.
Sunghoon threw you a short glance and narrowed his brows.
“What do you mean?”
“You and that girl.” the way you pronounced the word ‘girl’ with so much emphasis gave off hints towards him that you’re implying something.
His shoulder fell as he stared at you for a while, like unconsciously asking if you’re being serious with the choice of tone you decided to use at him. He sighs, when he realized you aren’t budging, but instead crossed your arms at him.
He’s already too tired to even explain things that you won’t listen to. So he struts closer you, held you over your hips and planted a sweet kiss on the lips.
“Let’s just go home, hot stuff. I’m tired.” and he walks over to the driver’s seat not even bothering to open the door for you.
But it seems like you are in the mood to be petty. So even after you made it to the passenger seat and he started driving on your way home, you bring up that topic once again.
“I saw the way she looks at you. I bet she’s undressing you in her mind.”
It made him sigh and roll his eyes. “Seriously? Are you going to talk about that until we makes it to the apartment?”
“Why? You irritated already?” you tilt your head and he glanced at you with piercing gaze. It didn’t bother you at all. If he’s pissed, then you are too.
“You didn’t even introduce me to her.”
His fingers taps his steering wheel more frequently and bit his lips. He sighs, calming himself.
“I did. I even told her your name.”
“But you didn’t told her that I’m your girlfriend!” it was so petty. Even you, you also think that this is such a nonsense thing to argue off. It’s just seeing her look at your boyfriend that way while you’re there doesn’t sit right for you.
Sunghoon scoffed loudly and even if he have a smirk on his face, there was no humor on it. He’s slowly losing his patience.
The wiper of his car moves when it suddenly started raining. It’s the last thing you care about. Your focus is on the hot drummer that’s currently driving you home in your shared apartment. The hot drummer that’s clenching his jaw hardly while trying his best not to argue with you. The hot drummer whose lips so red after you kissed him multiple times to make that bitch know her place. The hot drummer that is clenching his jaw hardly because you keep pushing his buttons at the moment.
“Are you fucking serious right now?” he couldn’t help, but curse.
“Be honest with me. Are you two close? Because with the way she linked her arms, it seems like so.”
He rolled his eyes as he teared his gaze off of you and back to the road. The rain are still pouring hard that its a little difficult to drive.
“You really aren’t going to stop unless I answer your questions, are you?” he surrenders. You didn’t answer and just crossed your arms while looking at him. Waiting for what he’s about to say.
He gave you another short glance as he shook his head. Like he couldn’t believe what situation you just put him into.
Honestly, you don’t know what exactly it is that you wanted to hear from him. If he answers that he doesn’t know her that long, you will still feel pissed because why the hell does she acts like they’ve been best friends ever since they were born? And if he answers, yes they know each other for a long time, you will feel really bad because you will feel jealous.
“We’ve known each other since highschool. Even before the band started playing in other places.” he says.
Your shoulder fell and he saw it from his peripheral view. He knew you won’t feel so good about it, but he also know that lying about it will only make the situation worse. The car fell silent right after he said it.
“Is she your ex-girlfriend?” that question doesn’t sound like you are asking him. Its more like you already know and just expecting an answer from him.
“No, okay? So calm your dumbass.” he’s starting to lose his patience for you.
You’ll be honest, you kind of thought he would say yes. That actually made you feel better. But not enough to let her slip away from your mind. Those eyes. The way she looks at you just boils something inside you.
“Did you two kissed before?” you fired him that question with more suspicion.
When you saw the look on his face, you felt something in your heart cracks. It definitely stab something in you when his expression confirmed that.
With slightly teary eyed, you raised your chin up to ask him your last question.
“Did you have sex with her?” bitterness latched through your voice and you bit your lower lip when he stayed silent again. Confirmed.
“Pull over.” you command and harshly wiped the tears that escaped.
He sighs, “Baby, come on...” he pursed his lips and even tried to reach over you.
“I said pull over!”
He clenched his jaw tighter then obliged, knowing well you will just fall into a much worse mood if he don’t do as you say. He’s expecting you to hit him by his arm or shout at him again, but he surely didn’t expect you storming out from his car. He didn’t see that one coming.
Between you two, he’s the jealous one. There are rare times that you get jealous and when it happens, its so hard to calm you down. Sunghoon’s heart is thumping hard, slightly thrilled to watch you acting like this. The oh so perfect, y/n. Shouting and acting crazy out of jealousy. He bet he’s the only one who made you feel like this.
“Y/n!” he shouts and went after you.
The rain starts to pour harder, but it didn’t bothered you at all. You marched away from his car, towards the nearest bus stop. With just a few steps, he managed to catch up on you and grabbed your arm then yanked you towards him.
“Let me go!” you screamed at him.
Sunghoon’s clenching his jaw as he stares at your face carefully. It was hard to tell if you’re crying or not due to the rain that’s slowly soaking you both. Despite your attempts to free yourself, Sunghoon just tightens his grip and kept his stares over you.
“Stop being a brat and let’s go back inside the car! We’re both drenched because of you!”
You clenched your jaw and hands into fists. People who passes by will probably think that you’re both losing your minds. Going out in the middle of the rain and fighting at 2 am. Thankfully, there are fewer cars driving through.
“I cannot believe you fuck that bitch!” it was rare enough to see you shouting, but much more rare to hear you cursing like this.
“It was a long time ago!” he renew his hold and this time reached for the other arm. The wetness of your skin kind of makes it slippery, but he knew he won’t let go of you.
“That happened before you, y/n! And it means nothing for me.”
“Clearly isn’t the same for her?!” you stopped resisting and just stay still, glaring at him.
“The way she links her arms and flirts with you drives me insane! Like I want to pull you away and kiss you in front of her type of insane!”
Sunghoon’s dumbfounded. He knows he should not feel so happy about what he heard, but he is. Just by thinking of you going crazy to the point you’ll insist public affection is making his heart race. To think you are crazy for him as he is to you, is driving him even more crazier. He just couldn’t get enough of you.
“Then why didn’t you?” this time he seems more calmer that made your narrowed brows falter. He was just screaming at you too, now he’s a lot calmer.
“I’m yours, y/n. I belong to you so claiming me in front of anybody is no problem at all.” he says and took another step closer. Your bodies pressed together and when he noticed that you aren’t trying to escape his hold anymore, he raised his hand to cup your face.
“I don’t fucking care if she tries to flirt with me. I don’t care about her. All I care about is you.” his eyes slowly roams his eyes to your pretty face.
“Yes, we did kissed and fucked before,” he sighs and your lips pursed into a pout but let him finish what he wants to say.
“But she never made me feel like this.” he held one of your hand then rest it above his chest, enough for you to feel his racing heartbeat.
“She doesn’t make me nervous whenever she stares at my eyes. She doesn’t give me butterflies whenever she smiles at me or melt my heart whenever she hold me.” your eyes water from his sincere words as he licked his lower lip, gaze not leaving you.
Both of you are soaked, but it didn’t bother you at all. Sunghoon’s bangs covers his forehead, some beads of rains falling from it over to your face as he stare down at you.
“That’s all you, love. Only you can make me feel madly in love. Like I will go crazy because I love you too much.” a tear fell from his eyes along with the raindrops from his hair. He looked ethereal staring at you lovingly, with so much emotions that makes your heart burst because of exceptional happiness.
“That’s the way I love you.” he murmured near your lips before you leaned to press a hot kiss for him.
“I love you so much, Hoon.” and this time, it was his turn to lean and kiss you passionately.
Disregarding the fact that you are under the hard pouring rain, sharing probably one of the most memorable kisses of your relationship, you’re mind is clouded by how intense your feelings are for the man that holding you right now. It’s funny how moments ago you’re just screaming at each other and now, your lips feels so hot connected together.
But it seems like, love is not enough to keep the relationship steady. And just like what older people used to say, everything is bad when its too much.
Being with Sunghoon felt like a dream with nightmares, clear blue oceans with big dangerous waves and a freaking roller coaster ride. Sometimes you’re so happy that you feel like your heart will burst with so much emotions and sometimes you feel like everything’s too much. That its tiring and draining you.
It somehow toxicating. And this toxic relationship with Sunghoon is honestly tiring you.
“And now you are giving me the silent treatment? Wow!” his sarcasm rubs on you, making your heart feel more heavy.
“I have nothing to say to you after what you just did, Sunghoon.”
“What? You’re mad because I embarrassed him? He’s clearly hitting on you!” your head snaps at him with glaring eyes.
“He’s just being nice and he’s my head supervisor!” your tone raised and he didn’t liked it in one bit.
Sunghoon’s always the jealous boyfriend. You actually couldn’t understand why he’s being like this when you already made it so clear that he’s the only one for you. That there’s no man that can ever steal you away from him.
“Oh, okay. I see...” he clenched his jaw before laughing with no humor. He faced the road and tried hard to focus on driving.
“If you want to impress your supervisor so much, why bring me with you?!” his statement made you roll your eyes in annoyance.
“Because you’re my boyfriend and I want you to be there for me! Will it hurt so much to be supportive or know something about what your girlfriend loves to do?! It’s not always going to be about you, Sunghoon! I need you to be there for me too!”
Your words may had come out wrongly, but all you wanted is for him to be for you. It was a thrilling day since employees should make good impressions to the supervisors to show how fit and reliable they are for the company, but your bofriend just made a scene and now you have no idea how you will show up to work on Monday.
“I told you already that these type of events are not for me! People are clearly looking down on me for having such a wonderful girl like you! They will always rub it on my face how perfect you are and that you deserve so much better!” his tone raised and it made you jolt a bit.
“And it seems like you just don’t get it! You kept on forcing me to go and I hated it! You are just determined to prove me that they’re so right!”
Your heart cracks and his words are like knives straight to your heart. You know him. Whenever he’s mad, he ought to say words he doesn’t mean. That’s his way of avoiding to show what he truly feels. You can tell by his blood-shot eyes and clenching jaw. But you are tired. You are tired of understanding him.
“Is that how you really see me? Do you really think that that’s what I’m doing?”
He clenches his jaw, being stubborn. “Maybe you are really ambitious and I’m just the stupid boyfriend who knows nothing but to enjoy music.” he says emotionless.
A tear left your eye. You can’t take this anymore. You had enough.
“Stop the car.” it was almost audible, but thanks to the deafening silence after what he said made it clear and loud. He furrowed his brows and looked at you, checking if you’re being serious.
You two have been arguing about you and this job for a week. And the event is today and Sunghoon just ruined it for you. Honestly you’re getting enough of it. With all the stress from your work and family, he suppose to be your resting place. But that’s not the case anymore.
He did stop the car and even before you open it, he said something. “The moment you leave, we’re done.” he said coldly.
You halted from stepping outside and felt your heart crack, but you knew you needed it and so you did. You left him.
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“Jake’s so sweet, y/n! I truly envy you for having him as your boyfriend!” one of your friends exclaimed right after Jake left your table to go order some food.
You gave them a small smile. They’re right. Jake is really the best boyfriend. He treats you very well. He’s everything you’ve asked for before. A caring and loving boyfriend. He’s working in the corporate world, which matches yours. He’s very gentle towards you, always got the doors for you, he never makes you wait, he cares for what you want and a man of his words. He felt like so warm to be with, someone you can be comfortable with easily.
“Yeah,” you replied short with a small smile on your lips. They giggle, truly happy for you.
“Thank God you snapped out of it and finally got the man you deserve.” one of them says that made your smile falter.
She didn’t mention anything or any name, but you knew who she’s referring to and what she means by that sentence.
An awkward laugh from another friend broke the silence and just diverted the topic. You tried to pull up your smile once again, especially after seeing from a distance that Jake’s already on his way back to your table.
He sets himself at the chair beside you and smoothly made a conversation with your friends. He’s very friendly too. He gets along with people with no sweat. Such a pure man.
You’re about to put a straw to your drink, but he beats you out of it. He reached for it and carefully slid it towards you while still talking to your friends. It made you smile. Being treated like this sure feels right, feels okay. But why does your heart feel a little heavy?
Jake threw his arm and placed it behind your chair, hand caressing your arm gently. You pushed whatever that feeling is behind your mind and tries to join their conversation as well.
The day went smoothly and now Jake dropped you at your place. As you unclasped your seatbelt, he went out of the car then walked around so he can open your door for you. He even offered a hand with that warm smile of his.
A chuckle slips off from you before you accepted it and went out. His other hand rests over your hip as he slightly pins you to his car to place a kiss over your lips. He smiles after a couple of pecks then leans away to stare at your eyes.
“You’re so beautiful.” he says sincerely that made you smile widely. Jake and his words.
“You’ve been saying that all day, Jake.”
He chuckles, biting his lips feeling a little shy. “Just so you wouldn’t forget.”
“Thank you.” you said while looking straight to his eyes.
He might take it as a thank you for today, but there’s more to it. Jake’s the next serious relationship after Sunghoon and it can’t be helped to compare the two of them. Even if you know its not good to do that, you just can’t stop yourself from doing so. They’re very different from each other.
“No problem.” he leans again to give you another peck.
“See you tomorrow, baby.” Jake said with a soft smile. You nodded and waved before going inside your apartment and called it a day.
It’s been almost a year ever since that night and yet its still fresh from your memory like it was just yesterday. You resigned from your previous job. You wanted so bad to convince everybody that it was because you’re embarrassed by what happened prior to it, but no. It was mainly because you kind of blamed it for losing your relationship. Kind of dumb, but maybe you are really insane when it comes to him.
Sunghoon never contacted you after that. You didn’t hear from him ever since and honestly it pissed and got you butt hurt. Well, you did change your number and blocked him from all your social media but you kind of hoped he will try to reach out for you.
Seems like it was meant to end that way.
Some people from your life kept telling you that you did the right thing, that it was the best decision you’ve ever made. You got a new job, got a new boyfriend that your parents approved. They adore Jake so much. He’s so close to your Mother and to your Dad as they’re both into business.
You should be happy about it. You are happy. But a part of you aches for someone. A bitter feeling lingers inside you because they never tried to open their heart for Sunghoon before. It makes you think that if they did, maybe things went a little more okay.
You threw your head back and stared at the ceiling. A slight guilt crept inside your heart. You got the perfect boyfriend you’ve been praying for and he’s treating you right. He barely even fight with you as he was always understanding.
But as stupid as it sounds, you missed screaming and fighting with Sunghoon. Those instense moments that just brings out much more emotions within you that makes you act insane.
These thoughts are making you crazy so you decided to take a quick shower and just call it a day. You went to bed with eyes brimmed with tears, aching and missing him so bad. It frustrates you because you feel helpless, unable to do anything about it. You’re scared to think that you are still thinking of him right now while he’s happy with someone else.
The next thing you know, it was morning already. Your eyes hurts a bit for crying to sleep last night so you’re slightly out of it when you went to your office.
“Do you want some coffee? Looks like you need one.” one of your officemates offered that you returned with a small pout.
“Please.” and she nods before going to the pantry for a while to get you your coffee.
“Here you go.” and she gently placed it on your working table. You mumbled a small ‘thanks’ as she settles at her chair beside yours.
“Oh!” your head craned to glance at her. “We will be meeting the new potential investors to our company later. I heard one of them is really good looking.” she giggles that made you smirk.
“You know its not always just by the looks, right?”
She rolled her eyes, “Easy for you to say because you have a gorgeous boyfriend!”
You laughed, “That is right.”
You joked around for a while before you’re asked to prepare for the arrival of the vip guests. Soon after, your head supervisor walks in and behind her are men wearing suits and tie. Looking like some young bachelors. Tall and handsome men.
As your eyes shifted to the last one who walks inside, your heart dropped. His familiar fair skin, charcoal black hair, noise pointy with a pretty mole at the side of it, eyes blank surrounded with thick and pretty eyelashes, topping it with his thick eyebrows that makes his skin color glow even more. His lips naturally red and luscious. Your knees weakened at the sight and heart started to race.
“Oh my god, Y/n!” she whispered beside you and even wiggled a little like as if she was got electicuted.
“He's so handsome!”
Oh hell yes he is. And your eyes watered at the sight of him. The familiar feeling of longing occupies your whole system. Park Sunghoon stood there looking so breathtaking. You missed everything in him and you hate how he looked so okay.
He unconsciously roamed his eyes around and accidentally met yours. It grew slightly, clearly not expecting seeing you. His lips parted a bit and didn’t glanced away.
“Y/n?” she snapped you out of your thoughts and you quickly teared your gaze away, feeling ashamed for staring too long. He probably saw you looking like a loser for being affected too much.
Sooner, they guided you inside to start the meeting and you kept on shifting from your seat. Having meeting like this is normal for you already, but now that you have your ex boyfriend sat at the other end of the table makes you really conscious.
“You okay?” your office mate might’ve noticed your weird demeanor so she looked concern.
You flashed her a shy smile and nodded then tried to focus on the person talking. But a minute after, your mind is drifting somewhere else once again. Even before you know it, your eyes shifts to where he was sat and to your surprise, he’s looking at you already.
You glanced away and cleared your throat. Embarrased that he caught you stealing glances at him.
When you couldn’t take it anymore, you turned over your supervisor and tried excusing yourself. Making up a lie that you’re not feeling well. She seemed to buy it and asked you to take a rest. Without wasting anytime, you stood up and politely excused yourself from the meeting.
A few steps out from the conference room and you heard it opened again. You ignored it and tried calming yourself, but the memory of Sunghoon’s eyes flashed before your eyes. Your eyes got teary. Seeing him just awoke your sleeping feelings for him that you tried to bury deep inside your heart.
“Y/n.” and a hand halted you from making another step.
You glanced at the person who stopped you and your heart thumped even faster. His brows narrowed and eyes looked concern.
“Are you okay? Why did you leave the meeting?” his tone sounded so soft and it makes you want to cry on the spot.
Now that you’re face to face and this close to each other, you can see how much he grown. He slightly changed. Good change, mostly. He looked even more mature and manly. His familiar manly scent invaded your nose that draws in so many memories of you two.
“Y-Yes,” and you flashed him a fake smile. “How are you, Sunghoon? It’s b-been a while.”
His shoulder relaxed after hearing that you’re okay. His eyes dropped to his hand holding your arm and slowly, he lets go of it.
“I’m good.” he responded briefly before roaming his eyes on your face. His heart aches.
“It looks like you’ve been doing well.” there's a hint of sadness looming over his tone, but you tried to ignore it thinking that you’re just mishearing it.
“Yeah.”
“Good to know.” it sounded a little sarcastic.
“Why are you here? Did you stop playing with your band?” the question you wanted to ask so bad. It was odd enough to see him here and much weirder because you know how much he hates wearing suit and ties. Tho you must admit that he looks so good on it.
He smirks, bitterness over his eyes.
“I still do, but not as often as before.”
“Ohh,” you sounded sad because you are. You know how much he loves doing that.
You’re about to say something else when your phone rang. You fished it from your pocket and when you saw your boyfriend’s caller id, you felt like someone slapped you back to reality. You want to hurt yourself for starting to act crazy once again just after seeing your ex boyfriend.
When you glance back at him, you saw his eyes darted at your phone with a cold expression on his face. You gulped, feeling nervous before you answered it.
“Baby!” the cheerfulness over Jake’s voice spreads guilt on your chest pretty fast. A tsunami on the shore, coming unexpected.
“H-hey, babe.” you murmured and steal a glance over at Sunghoon.
His expression fell cold as he straighten his back, not leaning anymore so he can slightly match your height. His hands slid inside his pocket as he stared at you intensely. His eyes are piercing right at you, like a cop catching you red-handed. To why he is still standing there and not leaving is slightly a mystery for you.
“Hi sweetheart. I called just to remind you about later tonight.” he says, accent coming a little strong.
Now you’re attention had been snatched away from the beautiful man standing right in front of you. With a confused face, you wondered what he is talking about. Trying to remember if you missed any plans he had made for the two of you tonight.
“T-Tonight? What’s up tonight?” and you slightly turned away from Sunghoon for some privacy. But you can still feel his heated gaze, burning holes at the back of your head.
“Don’t tell me you forgot?” he asks, slightly taunting. You didn’t respond and just wait for him to reveal about it.
“We’re having dinner at your parents tonight, baby.”
You draws in a sigh and hand raised to massage your temple.
“Oh, that was today.”
He chuckles, “Yes. Don’t worry, I got your Mom’s favorite flower and your Dad’s wine.”
You bit your lower lip for another perfect boyfriend scenario he just pulled.
“Thank you, babe. I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Hmm, i love you.”
You stood cold on your feet. The words are at your tongue, you just have to say it but for some reasons, something’s stopping you.
“Babe?” Jake’s voice snapped you back to reality and you cleared your throat then chuckles.
“S-Sorry, spaced out a little. I l-love you too, Jake. See you later.”
He chuckles, “Okay, cutie. Have a nice day.” and then he ended the call.
The silence and heavy atmosphere enveloping you and Sunghoon are undescribable. You’ve never had something like this with him. Even during your biggest fights, its never been like this.
Slowly, you glanced at him and his eyes looked cold. For a brief moment, it seemed like you saw sadness on it but when he saw you looking he switched it right in. His jaw clenches as he stares right at you, like waiting for you to say something to him.
“U-Uhm, nice seeing you again. See y-you around, Sunghoon.” and you turn your heels, ready to leave him when he said something.
“So it was that easy for you to find someone else, huh? Glad to finally know it.” his words are filled with nothing but slight anger and bitterness.
“Excuse me?” you whipped your head to look at him with furrowed brows.
“You left me and find someone new. It was easy for you.”
“You. Made. Me. Leave. You.” each words was emphasize so you can make your point.
“And what do you know about what I feel? It was not easy for me!” your tone raised because of how he just made you upset with what he said.
“Doesn’t seem like it for me.”
You thought he changed, but clearly he didn’t. You are dumb enough to be shaken by him.
“I’m not having this conversation with you right now.” and you turned around, having the firm decision of leaving and getting him out of your sight.
Two steps and he managed to grab your wrist once again. He sighs, heavy sighs.
“O-Okay, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way.” he licked his lips and gently made you face his way.
When he saw through your eyes how he hurt you again with his words, he almost want to hit himself. He already knew what went wrong before. How he fucking messed everything up. How selfish he is. And he doesn't want to repeat the same mistakes once again.
He was always someone whose hard to read. Yes, you are one of the very few people who can understand him right away, who can read through him from time to time and definitely one of the top people who can deal with his shits. Sunghoon’s not really good at showing how he cares to people. He have his own ways of showing them, and he thought that was enough. But he was wrong.
Sunghoon loves you. He loves you so much that he changed a lot ever since you left. He changes his way of thinking and even exerted effort to become someone better for you. It's such a shame that it took him to lose you to realize things.
The thing is no matter how confident he is to a lot of things back then, a part of him was secretly insecure. Insecurities that built up through the journey of having you as his partner. You’re a wonderful person and he always think that he was very lucky to have you. And so the insecurity and fear of losing you gets the best of him.
Being someone whose not expressive and overthinks a lot isn’t a very good combo. Makes him do a lot of stupid things that hurts you so much. He was so regretful of those times and if he can do anything just to go back to fix everything, he will. But he can’t go back. There’s no such thing as time machine.
What he can do is try. Try to make you feel how sorry he was. Try to make you see a different him, a better version of him. The better version that he strive to be just for you. And try to make you feel how much he loves you.
“I’m really sorry for what I did back then.” he started and licked his lips. He kept sighing heavily to ease his nervous feelings, calming his racing heart.
He had rehearsed the words he wants to tell you once he saw you again, but they all became pointless as his mind went blank just by having you standing in front of him.
“Not just the last night we are together,” he felt his heart break by the mention of it. One of the nights he regretted the most. “but I’m sorry for everything. I was so dumb to realize things much faster. I was an idiot for not treating you better.” he licked his lips and stared right to your eyes.
“I love you, y/n. I still do.” the tears pooling your eyes starts to stream down your face.
“The same type of love I feel for you back then. I love you so much that it hurts. It didn’t change at all. It was always you for me.”
Right now, you felt like your heart is being squeezed so hard. These words you wanted to hear from him back then are finally happening. But things are a lot more complicated as it is. Jake’s face flashes through your mind and you can’t take hurting him.
And also because you still feel so hurt he didn’t do anything just to make you stay. Why now? Why now when you’re a little okay already?
Your lips trembles as you open them to speak.
“You know if you only went after me that night, I would’ve stayed. I would not leave you.” you says in your low voice.
His eyes softens and tighten his grip on you. Your eyes dropped at his hand and it took everything in you to unclasp his hold.
“I’m sorry, Sunghoon. A lot of things changed already, but,” your words halted. ‘But I still love you.’ were the words you wanted to say.
You shut your eyes and opens them, trying to hide your real feelings for him.
“I do kind of wish you tried to fix it after we ended. I waited for you.”
You saw him broke and it was so much harder for you. To see him like this is your weakness. You’ve always had a soft spot for him and it will always remain like that.
“Y/n I—” he was cut off when the conference room’s door bursts open.
You quickly wiped off your tears. Thankfully, Sunghoon’s built was enough to cover you from whoever that is.
“I have to go. Good bye.” and without sparing him another glance, you stormed out of the scene. Leaving the place. Leaving Sunghoon and leaving your heart with him.
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The encounter with your ex boyfriend just made you disoriented. You spaced out most of the day and you’re thankful that the people in your workplace just thought you are not feeling well. They didn’t asked much about it and just gives you space.
When Jake came to pick you up, you felt so much worse. His sweet smiles makes you so guilty. It felt so bad. You feel horrible for still having feelings for your ex when he was there with you. Treating you good like how you wanted.
“Jake! My boy!” your Dad’s cheerful voice errupted the whole room as he went to give him a hug.
You watch how he connected with your parents and it made you think about the times with Sunghoon. They’ve never been like that towards him. Your mother’s a little nicer than your Dad, but she never really tries to know Sunghoon as he is a little intimidating for her. That’s what she said.
Your Dad on the other hand just flat out shut his doors for him. After knowing what he does, he straight up dislikes him without even trying to get to know him more.
It made you feel bad for Sunghoon. Just by thinking of how would he react if he saw this scene of your parents warmly welcoming Jake to your home will hurt him like hell. And that’s what you did to him before. You kept on forcing him into this when you knew it was a low case already. You kept rubbing salt to the open wounds your parents had created to him.
“Honey, you all right?” your Mom took notice of your silence. The two guys looked at your way with concerns in their eyes.
You quickly pulled a small smile for them.
“I just don’t feel so well today, Mom.” she coos and cupped your face.
“Oh my cupcake. Let’s go eat already, I’m sure it will be gone once you have your favorite soup.” and she even gave you a hug.
Your Dad caress your arms and asked you two to follow them so you can start eating dinner already. Jake’s hands settles on the small of your back, eyes looking at you with so much concern.
“You okay, baby?”
You nodded with a small smile before he guided you towards the dining area. The dinner started and the three of them were the ones talking most of the time. You tries to join and forcedly laugh from time to time while eating so little. Just to avoid suspicion from them.
“I’m really glad you found Jake, y/n! He’s such a great match for you. Unlike that boy...” the scowl on his face appears for the first time tonight.
Your smile falters and you quickly fell on a foul mood. Your father always hated him. He never saw his efforts.
You lowered your head, doesn’t really want to hear more about it.
“He has a thick face for showing up here in our home multiple times months ago to look for y/n!” he added, sounding so upset about it.
Your hand halted from playing with your food after his words slowly sink into your system. You lift your head and stared at your Dad with furrowed brows.
“Sunghoon went here? When?” you asked in a speed of light. Doesn’t want them to bury this topic.
Your Mom and Jake was surprised to how you reacted.
“A week after you left his sorry ass. You know I was so pissed at him for coming back over and over again even after I told him you don’t want him anymore and that he should just leave you alone. You are better off without him. Maybe he is really just that stupid—”
“Why didn’t you told me this before?” your tone sounded so accusing. The look of betrayal on your eyes burns towards your Father.
“I don’t see the need of mentioning that to you. He’s already out of the picture. I really hate that boy. He’s bad for you. I never understand why you loved someone like him?”
“You never really tried to get to know him so how would you understand?”
“Pardon?” your Father’s expression looked offended by how you said the last sentence.
You stood up abruptly, making a dragging sound from your chair. They all looked at you with confusion on their faces.
“I should’ve known you can do something like that, Dad. I should’ve known Sunghoon will come here to look for me despite knowing that he will get nothing but mistreatment. I should’ve known.” you started marching out from the room and you can hear Jake calling out for you, but you couldn’t care more.
All you can think of was how hard must it been for Sunghoon. Now all his words from a while ago hits you differently. The way his eyes flashes sadness and how he looked so broken just made your heart crack into a million pieces.
He maybe a mess, but he is your mess. He is your person, your other half.
“Y/n hold on,” your steps halted right when you are at the front porch of your house.
Jake went after you and when you saw how scared his eyes and how he looked so broken, it hurts you. But you knew it will just break him more if you continue being with him when your heart clearly belongs to someone else.
“Where are you going?” he asks, even if he knew the answer already.
“I’m really sorry Jake. I love you, really.” you licked your lips and tears pooled the corner of your eyes.
“But I still love him. It’s still him.”
You’ve never seen Jake like this before. You are so used at seeing him smile that seeing him this broken, hurts you so much.
“Are you serious? No...” he chuckles with no humor, blinking rapidly to push those tears back inside his eyes.
“I’m sorry, Jake. You deserve someone who will love you with all their heart and that person is not me.” and you removed his hand from your arm.
A tear left his eyes, but you turned away. You are being selfish again and choosing what will make you truly happy.
After calling a cab, you told the driver the address of your old apartment you shared with Sunghoon. Hoping that he’s still staying in that place, otherwise you will have to go ask his friends.
On the way to him, you realized a lot of things. You realized his little efforts that kept you going through the relationship. You started seeing how he’s imperfectly perfect for you. That despite his flaws, he’s always been the only one who loves you genuinely. The person who will love you even if you fail. The person who you can show your vulnerable side and still think you’re the most wonderful person.
You went out of the cab and just right in time, the rain poured. It reminded you that same night where you ended things with Sunghoon. Starting to get drenched, you walked towards the apartment building that you used to stay in with him. The same apartment that holds so much memories.
On the other hand, inside the apartment, Sunghoon’s brows were hardly furrowed while he head over his door after hearing a doorbell. He's a little confuse as he expects nobody for tonight.
He opens it and quickly, the annoyed expression over his face was replaced with a surprised one.
“Y/n?” he uttered seeing you standing in front of his unit, all drenched.
Your eyes softens at the sight of him. Seeing him in his white plain shirt and black shorts that he always use to wear whenever you two stays inside. You felt so happy seeing him. Your mouth opens to say something but eyes shifted at the back of him.
The relief you felt washes away at the sight of a girl coming out from the comfort room.
“Who is it, oppa?” she asked and you felt so dumb.
You are stoned at your position for a while before starting to step away. You probably looked like a freaking loser being all drenched and crashing to his apartment. Your heart broke again if its possible as it was already broken, then you cleared your throat. Tears streaming nonstop.
“I-I’m sorry. I should’ve not come here...” and you stormed off.
You heard him calling out for you, but you didn’t stop. Trying to save some dignity left in you. The rain is still pouring hard when you arrived outside but you didn’t care. You walked like a lifeless being with no direction to go to. People stared, but you just ignored them. You are hurting so bad and you wished that the rain will wash it away.
“Y/n!” a scream halt your step.
His familiar voice echoes inside your mind and you heard rummaging steps approaching you. You wanted to run and save a face, but you didn’t. Your heart felt so heavy.
Two shoes came into your view and slowly you lift your head up. Sunghoon’s starting to get drenched by the rain too, but like you he seems to not care. His chest rises up and down, trying to catch his breath after running after you. He’s wearing a jacket now on top of his white t-shirt which is useless as its slowly getting wet as well.
You looked at him with broken stares.
“Why are you here?” he asks, hoping that you came here to tell him that you want him back. That you want him as much as he wants you.
Your lips tremble and hot tears brimmed your eyes. It made it a little harder to see his face clearly because of the rain, but you tried hard. Sunghoon notices and stepped closer, head slightly covering your face from the pouring rain as he stares down on you.
“I c-came to tell you that a lot of things already changed,” you started and tried to push away your pride. This time, you wanted to do it right.
“but my feelings for you remained the same. I love you, Sunghoon. I love you so much that my heart felt like it stopped beating when I left you. I love you so much that I knew I will never be the same again after we broke up. I love you so much that I ended things with Jake just so I can be happy again. It’s making me lose my mind, making me act insane. And that’s the way I love you.”
Sunghoon licked his lower lip and the rain was cold, but his heart was warm. God, how he missed feeling this way.
“And I know I hurt you before. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry for leaving that night and for thinking you didn’t try to fix it. I’m really sorry—” your words were cut off when he smashed his lips on yous.
Your hand reached over his clothes, holding it tightly for support system. His kisses started aggressive, like he wanted to do that for so long. Like he’s been deprived of it. The kiss lasted for a while until he leans away to catch his breath, you followed his lips for a few more pecks then his forehead rests on yours.
He cupped your face, warming it using his warm hands. While staring at his eyes, your loving gaze suddenly changed with a glaring eyes.
“What?”
“Who’s that girl at your apartment?” your question are like an interogation.
He smirks and chuckles. He even tries to kiss you, but you leaned away making him whine a little.
“She’s my cousin. She stayed overnight at our apartment after going out with her friends. She’s about to leave now.” you quickly melt when he addressed the apartment as yours and his.
You pout and calmed down. He chuckles and made your noses touch, staring at your eyes loving.
“I love you.” he says, placing another hot kiss on your lips. Your heart aches, but this time in a good way. You felt like you are finally where you should be. Inside his arms.
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navybrat817 · 8 months
Text
Within You
Pairing: Soft!Dark Bucky Barnes x Female Reader Summary: Bucky shows a different side of himself when you venture into a corn maze. Word Count: Over 3.2k Warnings: Explicit sexual content, DUBCON, unprotected vaginal sex, semi-public, breeding kink, spooky vibes, established relationship, possessive behavior, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?). A/N: Welcome to Navy's Trick or Treat Nonsense! Special thanks to @ghotifishreads who suggested soft!dark Bucky with a breeding kink and @tumblin-theworldaway for listening to me (s)cream about this. ❤️ Beta read by the wonderful @vonalyn ​, but any and all mistakes are my own. Divider by the talented @firefly-graphics. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
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It was your first Autumn with Bucky. The two of you had been dating for less than a year, but you were completely enamored with him. Not only was he doting and smart, but he was a man who made your heart flutter in your chest whenever he looked your way. Even thinking about him sets your heart ablaze. He was the one for you.
“Come on,” you smiled as you took his hand and pulled him toward the pumpkin patch entrance.
The two of you took turns regarding date nights and outings. Today, you chose a pumpkin patch. You told him it wouldn’t feel like Fall if you didn’t go and listed off the fun things to do. There was a hayride, pumpkins and apples to pick, a corn maze, and much more. He obliged since he knew it would make you happy. He even gave you a small smile when you told him the website claimed that the maze was tricky, but you knew he’d find his way out easily.
You stopped and inhaled the cool air, the scent of warm apple cider drifting your way from the stand nearby. The temperature dropped just enough that you were comfortable in a sweater and the sun peeked out through the clouds to greet you. It wasn't overly crowded and it was the perfect weather. Even better because you had the perfect man by your side.
It was going to be a good day.
“Where should we start?” You asked, smiling when a small group of kids headed toward one of the tractors. “Hayride? Pick a pumpkin to carve later?”
“Where do you want to start?” Bucky replied, a small breeze blowing some of his dark brown hair back.
Your answer died in your throat as you gazed at him. His hair was the third thing you noticed about him, long enough that it almost touched his shoulders and soft to the touch. You loved running your fingers through it, whether it was to soothe him and pull it when he was between your thighs. The second thing you took notice of was the massive size of your now boyfriend. Over 6’4” with broad shoulders, a puffed out chest, and thighs made for riding, he intimated most while he excited you.
His cool blue eyes, of course, were the first thing. Gazing into them was like swimming in a private sea, ready to ride a gentle wave or get swept away in a storm depending on his mood. You could handle the entire range of emotions because you were his girl. It was that simple.
“You’re staring, doll,” he smiled, your cheeks warm at being caught. If any other guy called you "doll", it would've sounded silly. It was endearing coming from him.
“Well, I can't help it. You’re gorgeous,” you said.
“You are gorgeous,” he argued, the compliment sending more heat to your cheeks.
“You said that this morning,” you teased. The two of you moved in together recently and you had a hard time getting out of bed some days. Waking up beside him was like a dream, but it was your reality.
“And I'll say it again,” he smiled before a girl stopped in front of the two of you with a tray.
“Hi,” she greeted with an ear-to-ear smile. “Would either of you care for a sample of cider? We have warm and chilled.”
“Ooh,” you smiled, glancing between the cups. You loved apple cider. “I'll take warm, please.”
“Same. Thanks,” Bucky said, selecting cups for each of you. He blew on his before he drank it, a weird look crossing his face as he swallowed. “Is something on the bottom of my cup?”
“Nothing on mine,” you said, glancing at his cup once you tried your cider. “I think it's a sticker. Is it a cauldron?”
“Oh! You got the lucky, special sample!” the girl grinned as you and Bucky shared a confused look. She balanced the tray in one hand as she handed your boyfriend an orange coupon and took the empty cups from you. “Free cider for two. Enjoy!”
“Thanks,” Bucky said before she went to give samples to others.
“Lucky guy,” you smiled, raising an eyebrow as he slowly licked his lips. “You okay?”
He blinked and nodded. “Yeah. Was just warmer than I expected.”
“You didn't burn your tongue, did you?”
“No, but you should massage your tongue with mine anyway,” he half joked.
You smiled and nodded toward the maze. “Why don’t we check that out first?”
“So, you’d rather check out a maze instead of soothing your boyfriend's tongue?”
You giggled as you made your way to the start, grabbing a small sheet of paper. There were different sets of “animal tracks” to find throughout the maze. Anyone who found them all got a prize. “Why check out a maze when I can check you out?” You asked, unable to keep a straight face. “That was cheesy.”
“It wasn’t cheesy,” he said before his smile widened. “It was corny.”
“Oh, my god,” you laughed more. One thing about your boyfriend, he could always bring a smile to your face. “You think you’re so…”
A little boy ran out of the maze with a smile before he lost his footing and pitched forward, his sheet of paper floating to the ground as it flew from his hand. You rushed over to help when he began to cry, carefully helping the poor child sit up. “Ouch,” he sniffled.
“Hey. You okay?” you gently asked, making sure to keep your demeanor calm as you brushed some of the dirt away. You also grabbed his sheet before it could blow away. “Can you tell me where it hurts?”
He wiped his face and pointed to his knee once he rolled up his pant leg. “Right here.”
“Okay. Let’s take a look,” you nodded as Bucky joined you, crouching down on the other side of the boy. He looked worried, too. Minus the small scrape, he looked fine overall. “Poor little guy. Scrapes are no fun. But you know what? You’re a strong little boy.”
“I am?” he asked in a small voice.
“Yeah. Very strong,” Bucky agreed. "My girl wouldn't lie to you."
It was sweet how he spoke of you. “And you found all the animals, so you get a prize,” you smiled, showing him his paper where all of them were shaded. “You’re strong and smart,” you added, which brought a smile to his face, too.
“Timmy!” a woman shouted as she jogged out to the maze. “I told you not to run off. Are you okay?”
“I’m okay,” he replied, taking your hand so you could get him to his feet. “Hurts, but I’m strong and smart.”
Timmy’s mom bent down to inspect his knee herself before she gave you a relieved smile. “Thank you for helping him. How can I repay you?”
“That's not necessary. We're glad we could help,” you said, making sure he had his sheet. “You enjoy your prize and listen to your mom, okay?”
“Okay,” he nodded, waving as he went with his mom. “Thanks!”
“Cute little guy,” you smiled as Bucky slowly stood up. Your boyfriend had a few expressions that you were used to seeing, but you couldn’t read the current look he gave you. It was as if he was seeing you in a different light. “What?”
“Why haven't I knocked you up yet?"
You opened your mouth to say something, a feverish and unexpected heat moving through your body. “I’m sorry, what?”
“You heard what I said,” he said, his piercing gaze rooting you to the spot. “Just wondering why I haven't."
Though you knew Bucky was the man for you, the topic of kids hadn’t come up much. Partially because you hadn’t been together a year yet. Wouldn’t it be too soon to have a little one running around when you weren’t even engaged? Not that the two of you had to get married to have kids.
Maybe him seeing me comfort Timmy brought it to the front of his mind.
“I don’t know, Bucky. Why haven’t you knocked me up yet?” you teased. You almost shrank under his gaze a moment later when he didn’t laugh or crack a smile.
“Maybe I should. We can go home and get started right now,” he said. There was no hint of a joke in his tone. “This would be a fun place to bring our kids one day. Don't you think?"
“Why don’t we talk about it after the maze?”
He looked hurt for a split second and you almost assured you weren’t blowing him off. You wouldn't do that. It was merely a serious talk for another time. “Sure. After the maze,” he agreed, taking your hand as you made your way back over.
A chill ran down your spine when you walked through the entrance. It was strange. You weren’t afraid, especially since it wasn’t dark outside. So where did the unexpected chill come from?
“You okay?” Bucky asked, his voice a little rougher than usual as his grip tightened on your hand. Did he feel weird being in here, too? “I didn't freak you out, did I?”
“I'm fine and you didn't freak me out. You know you can tell me anything,” you replied, shaking it off the chill as the two of you began to walk through. The maze took up almost a third of the entire place, the stalks high enough that neither of you could see over them. “I think we should find the werewolf tracks first. Because they're one of your favorite animals.”
Before you could turn right down one of the paths, he brought his mouth close to your face. “That and I wouldn’t mind sinking my teeth in and leaving my mark on you.”
The breath rushed out of your lungs when you turned your head and caught the darkness in his eyes. His pupils were larger than normal as he stepped closer, almost backing you into the corn. “Is that right?”
“And you’ll let me,” he said, your heart racing as he leaned in. His kisses stole the breath from your lungs and your eyes slipped shut just before his lips touched yours. “Won’t you?”
“After we find the first set of tracks,” you whispered, pressing your hands to his chest so he’d back away.
He didn’t budge.
“Seriously, doll. Why haven’t I knocked you up yet?”
This again?
“I thought we were going to talk about that after we got out of here,” you reminded him, stepping to the side to go further down the path. “Where is this coming from anyway?”
“Been thinking about it for some time. I just haven’t said so,” he answered as he followed close behind. Was he afraid to say something before because it was too soon? That admitting it would scare you off? “Now that I'm talking about it, I can't stop.”
You were tempted to make a joke that there was something in his special cider sample making him talk. “You're serious about this?”
“You moved in with me. We love each other. I want a life with you. Of course, I'm serious.”
Glancing over your shoulder to find him watching you, you couldn’t help but smile. “I love you, too, Bucky,” you promised before you focused on the path again. You weren’t sure just how far the two of you had walked through. “But something like that is-”
You shrieked when Bucky spun you around by the shoulder, a wild look in his eyes before his mouth met yours in a persistent kiss. Compelling desire moved through you, but it didn’t matter how much you wanted him. The two of you were still in public. There were families around.
This wasn’t the time or place for this.
He broke the kiss before he shoved you almost painfully to your knees. He was never that forceful. “I’ll lose my mind if I’m not inside you.”
“Bucky, what the hell?!” you asked as he moved behind you and dropped to his knees, too. He yanked your pants and underwear down before you could stop him. Did you want to stop him? “We’re in a maze. What if someone catches us?”
He scoffed as he pushed you forward, forcing you to brace yourself with your hands. The cool breeze touched your exposed pussy, sending another chill down your spine. “You think I care if anyone catches us? I need you and they can’t stop me. They'll see that you're mine.”
The corn seemed to move in closer as you heard him unbuckle his belt, as if to give you some privacy. It had to be your mind playing tricks on you. “I'm already yours. Can you just slow down for a second?”
“I’m sorry, doll,” he swore, clamping a heavy hand over your mouth. “I’m tired of waiting.”
Bucky sheathed you in one hard thrust, your cry smothered by his hand. You admitted to him once that he was the largest you’d ever had, which he both loved and hated. While it made him feel good that your ex-boyfriends weren’t as big as him, could never stretch you the way he could, he hated thinking of anyone else being inside you. He liked to remind you that no one else ever would be. And because of his size, he usually took great care in prepping you.
His need must’ve clouded him, the burn from the stretch more intense than usual.
“I’m sorry, doll. I don't know what's come over me. I can’t help myself,” he apologized again as if he sensed your discomfort, your cunt gripping his cock like a vice as you breathed through your nose. “But it’s okay. I’ll make you feel good. Just take me.”
You whined as he nearly pulled out completely and shoved himself back in as deep as he could go. That was your only warning before he set a steady pace, your hands fisting the dirt and your ears ringing as blood surged through your veins. It wasn’t long before your wetness coated his cock, the burn fading to pleasure from the friction. He fucked you before, but it was nothing like this. Bucky was like a man possessed. No, not even a man. More like a wild animal rutting into you, claiming you.
Where anyone could stumble along and find you.
“So soft. So warm,” he groaned, leaving sloppy kisses along your neck. “So fucking good.”
You tried to push yourself higher on your hands and knees for better support, but the force of his thrusts surged you forward. Removing his hand from your mouth, he placed it on the back of your neck as your cheek hit the dirt. The hold gave him leverage to fuck you deeper with your ass in the air. The soil felt cool in contrast to the hot palm against your skin.
“Better keep quiet,” he warned you, even as the angle sparked ecstasy within you. All you could do was bite your lip to try and keep the sounds in as much as possible. “Or do you want someone to catch me breeding you?”
“What?” you gasped, unable to lift your head as a new sensation hit you.
“You heard me,” he growled, draping himself over your back and maintaining his harsh pace as he breathed against your ear. “Gonna breed you. Gonna fucking drown your womb with my seed. ‘Cause you’re mine. All. Fucking. Mine.”
The sweet doting boyfriend you were used to was nowhere to be found as his cock wrecked your cunt. Was there something unexplainable causing him to act this way or had he been holding back? You would question him later. For now, you could only go limp as he fucked you into the dirt with vigor. And it felt good. You couldn't deny it.
“Gonna be so full of me. Fuck, you’ll look so beautiful carrying my baby,” he grunted, barely able to make out his words his thrusts increased in speed and strength. The slap of skin on skin filled the air and you almost had to cover your mouth yourself to stop your mewls. “Your belly round. Your tits nice and full. Might keep you knocked up so you remember who you belong to.”
The image of Bucky with his hand on your belly filled your mind, sending jolts of unexpected pleasure down to your toes. “I can’t take it, Bucky,” you gasped, even as you felt the tug of your building climax ready to snap. “It’s too much.”
With a deceptively soft kiss to your neck, followed by a small nuzzle, Bucky let out a deep moan. “You can take it. You always do ‘cause you’re mine. My good girl,” he rambled on as you whined, the wet slide of your pussy squeezing him tighter as you got closer. “Need to pump you full. Need your cunt to milk every drop from me. You want it. I know it. Come.”
You couldn’t hold on any longer, your fingers curling in the dirt again as you came with a cry. You were overwhelmed by the pure bliss, shocked at just how powerful your orgasm was. He hadn’t teased your clit, yet you gushed around him like he had. The squelching sound blended in with your whimpers as he fucked you through it.
Maybe you liked the idea of him breeding you more than you realized.
“That’s it, doll,” he groaned as he chased his release. “Take it. Every. Fucking. Drop.”
Bucky's rhythm faltered as his cock pulsed, spilling inside you with a growl. He kept his hips flush against yours as he breathed raggedly against your neck, keeping your bodies joined together for as long as he could. He didn’t move until he began to soften, making a whimper spill from your lips when he pulled out of you. His fingers quickly replaced his cock to keep his spend from sliding out of you.
“You okay, doll?” he asked, his voice still a touch of gruff mixed with softness. “I didn’t mean to be so rough.”
“Mmm,” was the only response you could give him.
It was like a switch had gone off as he helped you up, keeping you from collapsing as he got your underwear and pants up. He wiped as much of the dirt away with his hands as he could, softness in his eyes once again. Minus his disheveled hair, he looked fine. Like he hadn't just fucked you in the corn maze.
You two were lucky you hadn't gotten caught.
He hugged you as close as he could while you tried to make sense of his behavior. Whatever raging beast was inside him was satisfied for the time being. But what came over him?
Large hands framed your face as you tried to get your shaking under control. “I love you.”
“Love you, too,” you mumbled.
“I’ll draw us a bath when we get home, okay? Get you cleaned up and make sure you aren't too sore,” he offered with a tender kiss to your lips. “After I throw out your birth control pills. You won’t need those anymore.”
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So, how are we feeling? What do we think? Love and thanks for reading! 🧡
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endlessthxxghts · 1 month
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Dr. Miller - Pt 2
Orthopedic!Joel Miller x afab!Reader | W/C: 4.8k
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Summary: It’s time for your second appointment with Dr. Miller.
Warnings: canon-divergent - no outbreak, medical professional au. Reader (she/her) has female anatomy and is able-bodied. No physical description of race. Reference to reader’s clothing, but no sizes mentioned (everything is neutral). Pet names (darlin’, angel, girl, etc). Most definitely doctor malpractice LMFAO. 18+ MDNI. Inherent power imbalance (doctor-patient relations). Dirty talk. Hickeys/biting/marking. Fingering. Slight begging. Praise kink. Multiple orgasms. Spit kink. P in V unprotected (wrap it before you tap it, guys). Cum play/cum swallowing…snowball kisses🥴. Daddy kink… and last but not least, the ending.. I’m not gonna say what, you’ll just have to read, but I’m sorry😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 although I’m foregoing a warning or two for plot purposes, please let me know if they should be up here! I’ll fix it accordingly!🫶
A/N: Here goes round 2! As far as the series goes and as far as posting it goes LMAO!! This hellsite deleted my first attempt in posting, so hopefully it stays up this time around. And I’m giving a big thank you to @honeyedmiller for proofreading and catching my horrendous grammar mistakes lololol I love you🩶 Anywho, I hope you guys enjoy!!! I’d love to hear what you think :) luv u guys xx
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Friday. 4pm. Your next appointment with Dr. Miller was tomorrow. 
This was the first ever doctor appointment you’ve ever been excited for. The automated text their system sends out didn’t tell you to arrive early, and you’ll admit, you were bummed. 
You’ll show up early regardless. Maybe he’d be able to see you sooner if his schedule allows. At least, you can hope, anyway. 
After your appointment with him last week, you were left hurt and wanting. You knew the hurt was a natural reaction to the sudden dopamine drop, and something tells you Dr. Miller is a guy who’s adamant on aftercare. So, you swept those emotions under the rug easily. 
Not so easily, however, was your needy cunt and the way it drooled and throbbed for nearly an entire week straight, craving the one thing she almost had. She barely had a taste, but she was already hooked, addicted even. 
Your fingers, your vibrator, your purple dildo that’s helped you come plenty of times – nothing could get you off. Not anymore. 
Unbeknownst to you, Dr. Miller had the exact same problem. Well, okay – he could ejaculate just fine, but the want never seemed to leave his system. Ever since he’s had his taste of you, he could never reach the feeling of satisfaction. And it has taken an absolute toll on him. 
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Dee snarked. Only she could ever talk to him like that. She keeps him on his toes. 
“The hell is wrong with me?” he huffed. 
“You’re being a grump, doc,” she replies. 
He rolls his eyes. “Ain’t I always?” 
“Yeah,” she says thoughtfully. “But you seem more… miserable.”
“Gee, Dee, well thank you for that,” he replies monotonously. 
“You’re welcome,” she snickers. She comes closer, voice hushed. “Seriously, though. Do you need to get laid or something?”
He chokes on the coffee he now regrets bringing up to his lips. “Jesus,” he coughs. “Time and place, Dee,” he says, trying to collect himself. 
She raises her hands up defensively. “I’m just lookin’ out for ya, doc,” she smirks, howling out a laugh as she puts Dr. Miller out of his misery by returning to her desk. 
He just shakes his head in response, fighting the blush on his cheeks at the thought of you taking care of the needs Dee so outwardly pointed out he had. 
Dr. Miller wouldn’t have to wait much longer, though. Your appointment was so soon, only one more work day before he’s able to be blessed by your presence again. That is, until Dee finds another opportunity to shit on Dr. Miller’s mood. 
“What do you mean we’re supposed to close early tomorrow?” Dr. Miller gruffs. 
“Exactly that, Miller,” Dee treads lightly. “It was in the calendar. Too many people have off in the afternoon tomorrow. It’s Easter weekend. You’ll be sorely understaffed.”
“Then who booked the patients after 2 if us closing early was in the calendar?” Dr. Miller is never one to be an asshole, dictating boss, but his irritation is very much getting the best of him right now. 
Dee whispers her next response. “…The new hire. But don’t blame them. I should’ve caught it sooner,” she reasons. 
Dr. Miller takes a steadying breath. “So how many people do we gotta disappoint right now?”
Dee pulls up the calendar on her phone. Dr. Miller watches her shoulders physically relax. “Oh! Actually, you’ve only got one person. At 4. I’ll call right now to reschedule,” Dee says with a finality. 
“Wait- who?” Dr. Miller asks. He knows who it is. 
Dee looks confused for a moment, but she indulges and reads off your name to her boss. 
“Y’know what, Dee,” Dr. Miller waves her off. “I’ll take care of that appointment, it’s fine.”
“Dr. Miller, are you sure-”
“‘Course,” he cuts her off. “I’m the only one in this damn office without Easter plans, anyway,” he huffs. “Empty nest or however that sayin’ goes.”
Dee nods in understanding. “How’s she doing?” 
“Fuckin’ amazin’,” Dr. Miller marvels. “She just surprises me more ‘n more everyday.”
Dee smiles before she returns to their situation at hand. “Are you sure you don’t want me to reschedule?”
“I’m sure,” Dr. Miller states. “Listen, I know this practice wouldn’t be able to run without any of y’all, and without you especially-” Dr. Miller explains. 
“You flatter me,” Dee butts in with a straight face. 
He smirks before continuing. “But have some faith in this old man, why don’t ya? I think I’m more than capable of doin’ the whole check in, check out thing.”
Dee takes in a sharp breath. “It’s much more than that, Miller, but nonetheless,” she holds her hands up in surrender. “I’ll put some faith in ya, old man.”
“Thank ya,” he drawls. “Now please go talk to the new hire about their mistake, I think they’re still afraid of me a lil bit.”
She laughs in the affirmative, shutting Dr. Miller’s office door on her way out. 
Holy shit. 
His plan to get you alone just worked itself out. Thank you, newbie, he thinks to himself.
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Dr. Miller’s office is less than ten minutes away from you, yet somehow you decide that if you left any later than 3, you’d keep Dr. Miller waiting, and you certainly didn’t want that happening.  
The parking lot is completely empty, a lone vehicle – a hefty truck – sits only two spaces away from your own. Your tummy swirls, knowing exactly whose car that might be. However, another swirl of nerves swarms through you. Why are there no other vehicles? 
Swallowing the anxious lump in your throat, you step out of your car and make your way inside the office. Inside is even further void of life than the parking lot. 
You make a beeline for the check-in window, picking up the pen from the cup to begin filling out your information when a deep drawl of your name startles you.
“Dr. Miller,” you jump, your eyebrows flying to your forehead. 
“Shit,” Dr. Miller chuckles. “Sorry, darlin’,” his voice was much softer, careful. “I do that a lot to my staff- sneak up on ‘em, they call it. Say I need a bell or somethin’ ‘round my neck.” 
You laugh with him at the little anecdote. He motions for you to come on back already, dismissing the check-in process since it’s only you, he explains. 
“Why is it only me?” You ask. Well, okay – you know why it’s only you, but how is it only you is the question. He did not just send everyone else home since you’d be here. That would raise too much suspicion. 
Walking you to the patient room furthest from the potential public eye, he retells the new hire’s mistake. You find yourself in the same mindset as Dr. Miller as you silently thank them for not being more careful. 
“You could’ve rescheduled me, you know,” you tell him, eyebrow raised. 
“Yeah, I know,” he quips as he opens the door for you. 
You step inside, turning around to face him. “So why didn’t you?”
The door clicks shut, and Dr. Miller’s now face-to-face with you, head tilted down to meet your challenging gaze. The air in the room becomes dangerously charged. 
“I think you know why, angel,” he says, scarily smooth. 
You don’t back down. “Enlighten me.”
He takes a step closer to you, forcing you to step back. “Why should I? When that very reason is right between those legs already crying for me, huh? I bet she’s a fuckin’ mess already, ain’t she?” 
You gulp as your ass hits the exam table, not realizing that Dr. Miller has been slowly cornering you. 
Without giving you a moment to respond, his lips are crashing into yours, his large hands grabbing onto either side of your face to keep you against him as your body melts into his hold. His tongue licks across your bottom lip, and your mouth opens, letting him in. You mewl into his mouth, each of your tongues lapping one another’s flavors, your senses immediately being consumed. 
The kiss breaks, and you both are frantic. Your hands grab onto the exam table behind you and you hoist yourself up, your fingers already finding the hem of your shirt as you rip it off, letting it fall to the ground. Dr. Miller practically growls at the sight, his chocolate brown eyes blackened with pure need. 
He shucks off his white coat, letting it join your top as he pounces on you again. He nips at your bottom lip, sucking it into his mouth and letting it go with a pop as he drags his scruffy face across your jaw and down your neck, biting pretty little bruises everywhere his mouth touches. 
Your hands find the bottom of his shirt, taking the liberty of pulling it off and whining when it gets caught over his broad form. “Patience, angel, I’m not goin’ anywhere this time,” he coos, his eyes genuine. 
You huff out in mock annoyance, your eyes silently thanking him for the reassurance. You pull back to let Dr. Miller take off the upper portion of his scrubs. Your irritated façade is quick to fade as your eyes coast his body: his broad shoulders and tanned chest, the product of laborious activity throughout one’s life; your eyes drag down to his softer middle, the product of a happy, indulgent life. Your spit is suddenly thick. 
Dr. Miller’s thumb comes up to rub across your bottom lip. “Ya alright? Got a lil bit of drool right there,” he taunts. 
You tilt your head and take his thumb in your mouth, letting your spit coat his digit generously as your hands pull him in by his waist, your fingers scratching the expanse of his sides and his belly. “So fucking sexy,” you murmur, eyes alight with hunger. 
Unable to verbally deal with the compliment, Dr. Miller pulls his thumb from your mouth, settling his hand on your jaw as he pulls you in to kiss your lips again. It’s much softer this time, more savory. He takes his time with it, and it has both your resolves breaking as Dr. Miller’s free hand finds the clasp of your bra and undoes it with ease, the article joining the haphazard pile on the floor. 
Dr. Miller kisses down your neck once again, your body leaning back to give him more access. His mouth goes straight for your hardened nipple, his tongue circling the entire area before putting as much as he can in his mouth and sucks.His hand fondles your other breast while he works the one in his mouth. You’re moaning and writhing at the stimulation, your pussy utterly leaking past the barrier of your pants and onto the exam table. 
“Dr. Miller, please,” you gasp. “Please- need more,” you moan, eyes rolling back at a particular nip to your bud. You can feel him smile against you, his mouth relenting only to move to your other breast. Dr. Miller is all about detail, of course he needs to make sure every part of you receives ample attention. 
He releases you with a pop, a devilish grin on his face as he stands back to his full height. His hand snakes to your front, the pads of his fingers rubbing softly at your clothed center, your slick completely soaked through. “Ya need more?” He drawls. “Tell me what you need, baby,” he says sickeningly sweet, his entire hand moving to cup your sex, the squelch of your arousal making his cock twitch. 
“Fuck-” you squeak, eyes fluttering shut at the feeling. “T-touch me, p-please,” you stammer. 
To outsiders looking in – hell, to even you – it’d seem as though Dr. Miller is entirely calm and collected, at ease in the way he’s been teasing you. Yet, with the way his cock is straining the material of his scrubs and the way his chest heaves, he is anything but. He is so far gone, he nearly wanted to rip your clothes off in the waiting room and take you over the fucking counter. But he didn’t, much to his displeasure, but he tells himself the buildup is worth the wait. And, fuck- with you? It’s so fucking worth it.
“I am touchin’ you, darlin’. Touch how? Use those words, sweet girl, I know you can,” he tells you, squeezing your cunt in a way that has your belly doing flips.
“Oh, God-” your head rolls back, body on fire. “F-fuck me, Dr. Miller, n-need your- fuck- need your cock, need it so bad,” you plead, eyes tearing up the more you speak. The man finally broke you. 
Dr. Miller smiles wildly. “Atta girl,” he rewards you, “I’ll give it to ya,” he breathes. “Lord knows you’re all I been thinkin’ ‘bout,” he admits as his fingers begin nudging your pants down. 
“Yeah?” you breathe softly as you lift your hips for him. Even in your aroused craze, you can’t help but soften at the admission. “Haven’t been able to stop thinking about you either,” you tell him. 
This is so much more than a fucking hookup, you both think. But you ignore that fact for later. 
Shaking off the emotion, as soon as your pants join your clothes, you lean back, settling your elbows behind you to keep you up. Letting your legs fall open, you quirk your brow. “Well, cowboy?”
That brings his attention back. His eyes are fixed on your shiny cunt, his tongue twitches to drink you up. But, no, this is about you this time. And what you want is to be full. He’ll give it to you. But, first-
“I was too big for you last time,” he states matter-of-factly. 
“I-” your eyebrows furrow. “What?”
“I hurt you last time.”
“No you didn’t-”
“I could tell it did,” he rebuttals. 
Without another word, he steps out of the exam room. A beat passes and he’s back – with a fluffy pillow. 
“Um-”
“Lift,” he states. 
You lift your hips up, and Dr. Miller places the pillow underneath your lower back. “This should help open your pelvic floor more,” he says. “And ease the tightness of the position,” he adds.
And it does. 
“Oh,” you whisper. “Thanks,” you say, your cheeks heating up at the action. 
He leans over you to kiss your tummy before his hands settle on the insides of your thighs. “You okay?” He asks. His thumbs rub up and down, dangerously close to where you’re leaking for him.
“Mhm,” you hum, not trusting your voice anymore. 
“I’m gonna fuck you,” he says. 
“Oh, God, please-” you whine impatiently. 
“But I needa touch you first, angel, I don’t wanna hurt you. Please?”
How can you say no to that? To his thick fingers and the way you know he can use them so expertly? How can you say no to the hands that have built his career or to the hands that’ll easily make you fall apart just as much as you know his cock would? You’d be an absolute dumbass to say no to that.
“Okay, Dr. Miller,” you say, voice shaky in anticipation. 
“Joel,” he offers.
Your heart skips a beat. “Joel?” you question. 
“Mhm,” he hums. “My name- well, first name, I guess,” he pauses. His fingers move closer to your core, the softest of touches ghost through your seam. You take a sharp breath in. “Just tellin’ you cuz I wanna hear you moan it when I make a mess a’ you. I bet it’ll sound real pretty, baby.”
His thumb finds your clit, then, and you do exactly what Dr. Miller – Joel – wanted. You moan out his name deliciously, sending him groaning at the pang of desire shooting up his spine, his cock weeping for attention. 
“Fuck yeah, angel, that’s it. Knew you’d sound so fuckin’ gorgeous, fuck-”
His thumb continues its assault on your throbbing bud while the middle finger on his other hand rubs through your wet folds, collecting up the arousal before he pushes into your entrance. 
It’s an easy push, his fingers are thick, so there’s still a slight stretch amongst the pleasure. The work he puts in with both hands has your hips bucking in his touch, and it eases your body enough for him to slip his ring finger along his other. 
His two fingers fuck into you at a sweet pace, the length of him reaching places your own fingers have never felt before. It’s pure ecstacy. “Oh, Joel, yes- shitshitshit, that feels so fucking good,” you cry, your head lolling around like a bobblehead, your body falling weaker and weaker the more he plays with you. 
“Yeah, baby? Like that? That feel good?” He grunts, his heart beating a mile a minute at how fucking pretty and wild you look and sound from his fingers alone. “So fuckin’ wet, baby,” he snarls. “You know what, pretty girl?”
“What?” you whine, trying your best to keep your eyes open and on him as your head begins to tingle from how hard you’re panting. 
“I think you’re ready to take me, baby, I think she’s so fuckin’ ready,” he grins, his fingers adopting a come-here motion, your sobs reverberating throughout the tiny exam room. 
“Come for me first, pretty girl, make a mess on my fuckin’ fingers, and I’ll give what you’ve been crying for,” he all but demands as he looks down and lets a big glob of his spit fall directly onto your clit, his fingers gliding over you even quicker in the mixture. 
“Fuck- Joel!” you scream, the spit being the action that completely throws you over the edge. 
“Jesus, angel, fuck-” he stills his fingers, letting himself feel the flutter of your warmth as you cream all around him.“So fuckin’ perfect comin’ all over my fingers, goddamn, messy fuckin’ girl,” he rambles, his eyes roaming every inch of your body, taking in every twitch, shake, and mewl your body is giving him. 
Your breathing starts to slow, muscles relaxing but not quite over its shaking. He pulls his fingers out of you and brings it directly to his mouth, his cock nearly bursting at the taste of you on his tongue. Another time, he thinks to himself as he bends down to pull the rest of his scrubs off, using the moment to place a chaste kiss to your puffy clit. You yelp at the sensation, a lazy, blissed out smile blesses him, and he can hear his heartbeat thrum in his ears at the sight. 
Joel crowds himself between your thighs again, pumping his cock a few times, his thumb reaching for the precum leaking at his slit and spreading it all over his length. 
“How you feelin’?” Joel checks in. 
“So fucking good, Joel,” you respond, doe-eyed but entirely honest. 
He wants to kiss you so fucking bad.
So he does. 
He leans over you as best as he can in this angle, his length rubbing against your folds as he leans in, his hand wraps at the base of your neck, pulling you in for an open-mouthed kiss – wet, hot, and slow. He pulls away with a blush across his cheeks, and your face is entirely engulfed by flames, too. Did that kiss make him nervous? Did it make you nervous?
Unable to look away from each other, you utter the first thing that comes to mind. “Please,” you whisper, though you don’t really know what you’re pleading for. 
“I got ya,” Joel whispers, pulling himself back to line up his erection with your entrance. 
Even though Joel’s fingers were a stretch all on their own and your body was quick to adjust, you genuinely don’t think anything could truly prepare you for the length and girth of Dr. Joel Miller.
Last week, it was damn near impossible. Thinking back to it, honestly, you think you might want to even thank the nurse that interrupted you two. Still, if Joel hadn’t prepared you today with his fingers, you definitely wouldn’t have been able to take him as fast as you are now.
He pushes in just the tip, and you both gasp at the initial pleasure. Your mewls are more pleasurable than painful this time around, and Joel takes that as the go-ahead to keep going.
“You tell me if I needa stop, darlin’, I’ll stop immediately,” Joel grunts, trying his best to keep slow. 
“God, fuck- Joel, I swear to God, you better not stop- need you so bad,” you lament. He finally pushes himself to the hilt, your rambling continuing as he does so. “Please fuck me, baby, fuck me hard, da-” you gasp and slap your hand over your mouth, catching yourself before you let yourself finish that word. 
Joel pauses all movement, his hands tightly on your hips as his purely black eyes stare down at you. “What’d ya say, angel?”
“J-Joel, I-I’m sorry, I don’t know what-”
“Not my question, babygirl,” he warns softly. “What’d you call me?”
You gulp, opting to just stare at him, silently begging him to spare you of the embarrassment. 
He withdraws from you, all the way out to the tip, then, oh so slowly he pushes back in. He pauses halfway, eyebrow raised. Words.
“Please, Jo-” you start. His hand squeezes your hip in warning. “Please… Daddy, please,” you whine, finally giving in. With that, he pushes in roughly to the hilt, knocking all the wind from your lungs as pure pleasure flows through every nerve in your body. “Oh, fuck!”
“That’s it, angel, such a good fuckin’ girl,” he moans, his thrusts slow but calculated. “Makin’ daddy feel so good, baby, shit-” he tells you, his own eyes finally fluttering shut as he revels in the feeling of the warmth of your walls, tight and fucking perfect.
“How’s daddy’s girl feelin’, baby? Feelin’ good? Hm?” he grunts with a particular thrust forward. 
“So- fuck-” you try to get out, your sweet cries of euphoria cutting you off and forcing you into incoherency. But you’ve experienced enough in this short time with Dr. Miller – with Joel – to know he needs this communication. He thrives on it. So you try your damn hardest. And fuck, it nearly sends him to his end. 
“F-feels so good, so so good- mmm, shit- love your cock s’much, daddy,” you slur, eyes nearly going cross-eyed as Joel’s hips start to move faster, his fingers gripping tight enough to leave little bruises on your waist, a matching set to the marks across your neck and chest. 
The wanton moans spilling from your mouth spurs Joel on, his brain short-circuiting at the feel of your velvety core consuming him. You feel him twitch before he feels you flutter. The sensation wakes you up a little, a wave of confidence overtaking you despite the fervent drive of his hips. 
“You’re close, daddy,” you whine, a mischievous grin across your face. “Can feel you,” you tell him, thrusting your hips softly, attempting to meet his every push and pull with the help of the pillow gliding underneath you. 
“Fuck-” he chokes, his hips only faltering in pace for barely a moment. One hand lets go of your waist and falls where you two are connected. “Need you- shit-” he pants. “Need you to come ‘round daddy’s cock first, pretty girl.” His thumb finds your nerves, slick and sensitive, and wastes no time in forcing you to the brink of another orgasm. 
His fingers circle you, matching the rhythm of his hips, and instantly, your eyes clamp shut, back arching deliciously as you let your legs open impossibly further. “Oh, daddy- oh God, oh fuck- I’m gonna come, I’m gonna-” you yell as your throat becomes hoarse, your chest sinking and rising as you let your body relish in the fire that Joel is throwing you into. 
“Give it t’me, lemme feel you, angel,” Joel urges, his lower tummy flexing as he feels your inner walls spasm and soak his pulsing length.  
“Oh, yes- yeah, fuck- please,” you babble mindlessly. Pulling yourself to sit up, your hand planted behind you, you pull Joel in, lips ghosting each other as his quick breaths fan against your lips. “You gonna come? My pussy that good, daddy?”
Your random spurts of teasing has Joel in all sorts of panic. Usually, he’s one to call the shots, and all his past partners never wanted or requested anything different, but it seems as though he has finally met his match. “Fuckin- Christ, doll- pussy’s so fuckin’ good, baby, daddy’s gonna fuckin- oh fuck-” he keens, pulling out just in time for his cock to spill his entire worth across your mound and your lower belly. 
“Oh my god,” you moan to yourself, your pussy clenching around nothing at the sight of him all over you. 
Joel takes a minute to catch his breath, his eyes scanning every inch of you like he didn’t just violate every Doctor oath he’s ever taken. 
“I think I need to be the one to check in this time,” you let out in a breathy laugh. “You okay?”
He still isn’t looking in your eye, and it makes you nervous. Is he regretting everything now? “Joel?” you call, barely audible. 
His eyes snap to yours before they fall back to where he was looking before. “Yeah, yeah, I’m alright, baby, I just, uh-”
Cutting himself off, he bends down slowly. You watch him, confused but intrigued. He sticks his tongue out, flat, and licks. From your mound to the lower part of your belly, he collects up the salty, milky liquid on his tongue. 
He brings his mouth up to you, his hand finding purchase at the back of your neck. He pulls you into his mouth, his tongue invites itself into your space along with the heady musk of his come, and you welcome it greedily, swallowing every little bit of his arousal that you can.
You break away just before his watch beeps: 5:45pm, fifteen minutes until closing. “That was-”
“I’m sorry, that was disgustin’ I don’t know why I jus’ did that-”
You lean in to nip at him, pulling away with a suck to his pouty bottom lip. “That was hot, Dr. Miller,” you smirk. 
Dr. Miller’s exam rooms, although not often, can see a lot of bodily fluids. Obviously not the kinds that you two have exchanged together, but with the notion of removing casts and such, sweat is bound to get everywhere. So every room holds baby and/or sanitizing wipes just in case. 
He grabs a pack of baby wipes underneath the cabinet and takes out a few. He wipes your entire lower half down, and grabs some more from the pack to wipe himself off. It’s a dance of wobbly limbs as both of you help each other dress back up, you being particularly whiny at how stiff the scrub material is when you try and blame it on his big size. 
“I thought you liked how big I am?” He quips, your eyebrows shooting up in response as you slap his chest. 
All dressed up, you two walk out of the exam room, both you and Dr. Miller on cloud nine as you make your way back to the front office.
Before reaching the door, he grabs on your waist, pulling you against the wall, towering over you. That beautiful Southern gentleman smile bright on display, the kind of smile that has your knees wanting to buckle. 
“I- I had a great time with you,” he says, a little bashful. Sure, the things you did together were otherworldly, but the things that came after? How he was able to help clean you, dress you, and simply just be with you afterwards? He really can’t remember a time he’s felt so right. 
“I did, too,” you tell him. “But, I think…” you trail off. 
His stomach sinks. Here it comes. We shouldn’t be doing this anymore, he knows you’ll say. 
“I think I can’t be your patient anymore,” you whisper with a giggle, wrapping your arms around his neck. 
“Dear God, you just about gave me a damn heart attack,” he huffs, burying his head into the crook of your neck, littering playful nips anywhere he can reach as payback for scaring him. 
You two break out in laughter, it slowly turning into an impromptu makeout session as his lips find yours again, both of you insatiable for one another’s taste. 
You’re so caught up in each other that neither of you realize the front door of the office unlocks, nor do you realize someone is entering the hallway you two are currently in. 
You also don’t hear the gasp coming from the person either, not until-
“Dr. Miller?!”
Shit. 
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harryslittlefreakk · 25 days
Text
arrogant s.o.b
summary: based on this request - grumpy/mean Harry and readers first fight and he says something really harsh/yells and makes her cry? And then feels really bad after like grumpyxsunshine vibes?
warnings: angst
wordcount: 1.6k
a/n: thank you to the anon who sent in this request!! 🥰💖 sorry it took me a while to get around to it. please let me know if this isn’t quite what you wanted, i don’t know if I’m 100% happy with it so im more than willing to tweak and rewrite!!!
my masterlist!! please feel free to send me more requests 💓 happy reading
“I miss you, Harry.”
You knew you were pushing it, he was already working himself to breaking point. But you couldn’t help it, you missed your boyfriend. His break was meant to be about finding time for himself again, spending time with his loved ones. And you thought that meant being with you, not spending every day confined to the four walls of a recording studio.
“I can’t delay my entire album because you miss me.”
“I’m not asking you to delay the entire album. Just take a day off, just once.”
“Why?! For what?”
“Doesn’t matter.”
Now you were both pissed off. You didn’t understand why Harry couldn’t just slow down. You’d only been able to see him in Italy for a few days, your work schedule unexpectedly busy. Part of you thought he was ‘punishing’ you for that, the sane part of you knew that his summer in Italy was his rest, and now he was back in London he needed to work. Harry’s work ethic was one of the things you admired most about him, and now you were arguing with him over it.
“Clearly it does matter.” He was stood by the door, keys in his hand, a dark scowl printed on his face.
“It’s fine, just go. Have a good day.” The hurt was evident in your voice, but you didn’t even want Harry to stay now with the atmosphere you’d created.
He hesitated for a moment, torn between wanting to stay and needing to leave. Finally, he sighed and turned to walk out the door without another word. The sound of the door swinging shut behind him echoed through the silent room, leaving you alone in your thoughts.
Tears welled up in your eyes as you sank into the sofa. You’d pushed him away when all you wanted was for him to stay. You knew you’d always come second to his career, he prioritised you over almost everything in his life but his music was so important to him. But once he finished recording, there would be interviews and appearances, then a tour, and then you’d be back here again. It was constant, unrelenting, and if he couldn’t even sacrifice one day for you, how could you expect him to slow down?
Harry stood frozen on the other side of the door, still stuck between needing to come back in and wanting to go. It never usually got to this point, one of you would back down before someone got hurt. It wasn’t exactly healthy, but it worked for you. He hated fighting, hated seeing you upset. But he was only now realising that it was usually you that compromised. He knew you well, and for you to actually speak up and ask him to stay despite knowing how important his work is to him? He’d fucked up.
He leaned against the door, his hand gripping the handle tightly as he closed his eyes, trying to calm the storm of emotions raging inside him. Guilt washed over him as he replayed the conversation in his mind. He knew he needed to find a balance between his work and his relationship, but it was easier said than done.
His hand fell from the door handle as he turned on his heel, dragging his feet away from the house. If he was going to make it right, he needed to be armed with all of your favourite things.
Harry replayed the morning in his head the entire time he was out. You’d woken up to his alarm as always, rolling over in his arms to wake him up with soft kisses. “Why do you set alarms if you know you can’t wake up for them?” you laughed, tapping at his nose as his eyes fluttered open. “Because you wake up and I get morning kisses,” he smiled, pulling you tighter to his chest.
He remembered how the morning light hit you at just the right angle, illuminating your puffy eyes and blushed cheeks. He’d caught himself wishing he could have five more minutes in bed with you, time to savour waking up next to his love. But he’d rolled out of bed in the same way as always, slipping out from under you just as you tried to curl your body around his.
You’d followed him to the bathroom silently, lingering in the doorway as you rubbed your tired eyes. “Wish I got to see you more,” you’d mumbled, eyes following his through the mirror. “You see me every day, kitten,” he’d replied, poking his tongue out when he saw you watching. He’d noticed your face fall slightly, a misty kind of sadness replace the natural glint in your eye. He cringed as he thought back, but he’d purposely ignored it to save himself the trouble.
“I see you when I wake up and just before bed,” you’d pouted, eyes glued to your suddenly fidgety hands. “I cant help that right now, pet. You know I can’t,” he’d tried to reason with you, and looking back, Harry thought maybe he was trying to convince himself. “Just a morning or an afternoon at home would be nice. Not even a full day,” you’d told him, voice cracking as you looked back up at him.
“I can’t have this conversation right now,” he’d muttered, kicking at the door until it swung closed in front of you.
And there he was now, heart struck with guilt at the thought of how badly he had neglected you.
As he heard your keys jingle outside the door, Harry finished rearranging his purchases across the bed. He gave one final look to the flowers on your windowsill, the beautiful blush pink roses he knew you loved. It was perfect, he just hoped it would be enough.
“Hi darling,” he smiled sheepishly as he walked down the stairs.
“Hi, H,” you replied, brows knitted as you stared at him. “What are you doing?”
“Come,” Harry murmured, reaching out a hand for you to take. You dropped your bag by door and took it, fingers tangling with his as he lead you back to the bedroom.
He stopped outside the bedroom door, pulling you into his arms. “M’sorry,” he whispered into your hair. “Didn’t think about what it’s like for you. I need time with you just as much as you need it w’me.”
“No, I’m sorry,” you told him, cuddling into his chest. “Nothing to be sorry for, pet.”
“Shouldn’t have pushed you like that,” you murmured, eyes closed as you breathed in his musky aftershave.
“Gave me the push I needed. M’not good at taking time off.”
“Don’t have to tell me that,” you laughed, stepping away from him as he turned to open the bedroom door.
“Got you your perfect day,” he smiled, stepping out of the way so you could see his creation.
All your favourite snacks were laid out on the bed, your matching pyjamas folded on the corner. The most beautiful flowers you’d ever seen in your favourite vase on the windowsill, candles lit on your nightstand and a cheesy rom com loaded on the tv.
“You did all of this?” you cooed, a grin spreading across your face as your gaze turned to Harry. He nodded, pulling his t-shirt off.
“Nuh uh,” you swatted his hand away as he reached to pick up the pyjama top. “Only my perfect day if you’re topless,” you smirked, quickly peeling your clothes off to throw the pyjamas on.
You climbed into bed next to Harry, pulling the duvet up to your chin before wrapping your body around his, your head at home on his chest. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, arms wrapped right around you.
“Made a few calls. Gonna start only doing three days at a time in the studio, then three days off,” he whispered, grinning when you immediately whipped round to look at him. “Don’t have to do that for me baby,” you gasped, brows furrowed.
“It’s the right call. Just gonna be longer days but worth it all if it means more time with you,” Harry winked, his hand caressing the curve of your waist.
You shifted upwards, placing a gentle kiss to his lips. “Thank you,” you smiled. “And congratulations.”
Harry returned your kiss, his lips lingering just a second longer than yours had. His touch and his kisses felt like home to you, his smile your lifeblood. “To me? For what?”
“To us. For our first fight,” you giggled, holding out a hand to high-five Harry. He grabbed a hold of your hand, using it to pull you even closer to him, until your faces were only centimetres apart.
“Here’s to our first and last fight,” he whispered, eyes locked on yours. His teeth latched onto your bottom lip as he went in for another kiss, the rocky waves in your stomach turning to butterflies as his tongue moved around yours.
You pulled away after a minute, settling back into his arms with a smile so bright it could have lit up the room.
“Can’t believe we started the day with you thinking your album is more important than me,” you mumbled, a mischievous sparkle in your eye as you tangled your fingers between Harry’s.
“Millions of adoring fans who’d do anything for me versus one woman? I know who I’m picking,” he teased, laughing as you smacked his thigh with your free hand.
“Maybe they were right,” you whispered, peering up at him.
“Hm?”
“About you being an arrogant son of a bitch.”
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wileys-russo · 3 months
Note
Alessia Russo “if Kim asks Kyra did it. Training.
recovery roomII a.russo
"well well if it isn't our little hat trick hero!" you looked up from your phone with a grin, steph getting out of her own car as you pushed up off of the side of yours.
"if it isn't the mighty captain catley! where's your child?" you teased, kyra not having left stephs side basically the entire camp. "oh god i have had the most blissful two days kid, you don't even understand!" steph moaned happily, dean having whisked her away to a spa to help with the jetlag.
"you picked a good one steffy." you smiled, always happy to see how well dean treated her and had treated her for the many years they'd been together.
"your turn next! when are we going out to test my wings?" steph asked with an excited glint in her eyes as the two of you started to wander across the parking lot waving to a few of the girls doing the same.
"oh my god stop that stephanie please." you laughed, face burning bright red at the way the older girl was flapping her arms around like she was a bird. "what? i'm being a wingwoman." steph grinned as you shoved her and the two of you fell into step again.
as far as your teammates both for club and country were concerned, you were in their eyes painfully single.
they went out of their way on team nights out to try and take turns pointing out people from all walks of life they felt would be a good fit for you, or stealing your phone to argue over whose turn it was to swipe away on your dating apps.
and up until a couple of months ago, you appreciated their efforts. as much as what most of the girls perception of your 'type' was, was horrifically wrong.
but that all changed when a certain blonde striker came barreling into your life, knocking the air from your lungs and kicking the cobwebs off your heart, filling you with emotions and feelings that up until then you'd assumed were permanently retired.
but neither you or alessia were oficially 'out' and hadn't ever had any sort of public relationship your entire careers, so with a plaguing fear in the back of both your minds that allowing the public eye into your little bubble would pop it entirely, you'd kept things very much to yourselves.
you'd both made an agreement before international break that you were feeling near ready to tell your family and closest friends at the very least, neither one of you feeling any sort of pressure from the other which was a welcome relief.
but not having seen your girlfriend for going on two weeks now, with you away on camp with the matildas and alessia with the lionesses, you were in an extra chirpy mood.
which is how you found your jaw near aching with how hard you'd been smiling all morning, relishing in catching up with all of your teammates and friends.
but eyes flickering to the doors of the cafeteria every few seconds awaiting your favorites blonde entrance you couldn't contain the butterflies fluttering around in your stomach in anticipation.
"oi! spade cadet, you still with us?" you were snapped back to reality as leah clicked her fingers in your face, humming and trying to tune into their conversation. "sorry, had some weird dreams, slept funny." you were quick to speak, excuse seemingly accepted as no one else prodded you for anything further.
then finally you heard her before you saw her, her boisterously melodic laugh echoing around the cafeteria as she walked in with vic and emily, shoving the shorter dutch girl beside her who hurried away to jump on teyah.
her eyes roamed the room before they locked with yours, sending you a dazzling white smile and a wink before she grabbed a tray and loaded up with breakfast, making a beeline for the spare seat at your table as the girls all greeted her happily.
"hi lessi." you smiled softly, swooning as she repeated the greeting back in the sweet accent you'd grown to adore, her foot brushing up against your calf beneath the table as she pushed you her juice and your eyes lit up, her own heart melting at the sight.
"steph!" you protested as before you could grab the small bottle it was snatched from your path, the older girl cracking it open and downing a large mouthful, pushing you away with her free hand as you reached for it.
"i had to poison check it! i'm just looking out for ya." your national captain grinned finally handing you back the now half empty bottle as you scowled and she only pinched your cheek in response.
"kyra's been a bad influence on you." you huffed with a roll of your eyes, her shoulder bumping into yours before she returned to her conversation with beth.
you looked up as someone gently kicked you, a smile curling onto your face as you and alessia played footsies under the table, careful not to stare too adoringly at one another and engage with your teammates around you.
catching your gaze you saw the blonde subtly nod behind her as she stood, grabbing both her tray and yours as well as leah and beths, a chorus of thank you's sung her way as she made her way out of the cafeteria.
you waited a few minutes before doing the same, lying to steph that you left something in your car and wanted to hurry to grab it before training when she stood to go with you, assuming you were heading to the media room for the mornings debrief.
caught up saying hello to a few more of the girls on your way you eventually made it out and carefully ensuring you weren't being followed or watched ducked away to your usual meeting place with your english striker.
you'd barely stepped into the recovery room before her hands were on you, a laugh leaving your mouth as the door banged shut and she had the audacity to shush you, wolfish grin on her features as she pressed you against the tiled wall.
"me? you made me slam it!" you whisper yelled at her, both of you pulling the other into a tight hug, melting into one anothers touch with content sighs.
"i missed you." alessia mumbled out, peppering a few kisses to your neck before pulling her head back. "we facetimed nearly every night!" you teased, arms wrapping around her neck as the taller girl smiled lovingly down at you.
"no thats where you say 'baby i missed you more'. then we argue for awhile over who really missed the other more, and then i just shut you up with a kiss." alessia beamed as you shook your head, fingers scratching at the base of her neck, fiddling with a few loose baby hairs which had fallen out of the bun at the back of her head.
"can we just skip to that part then?" you teased, puckering your lips and pulling her closer as her body vibrated in amusement but she wasted no time arguing, quickly pressing her mouth against yours.
you exhaled happily at the sensation of kissing her, forever consumed with the euphoric feeling which warmed your body from the tips of your toes right to the end of your nose, your whole body alight.
"babe we have the meeting!" you reminded with a laugh, the words mumbled against her lips as alessia pressed you more firmly into the wall, hands squeezing your hips and using the moment to slip her tongue into your mouth.
"less." you warned, pulling back with a slight gasp as she held your bottom lip captive between her teeth, sucking it back into her mouth as her right hand moved to cup the back of your head so she had a little more control over you continuing to pull away.
right as her feet kicked your own apart, her thigh slotting in between yours and your breath hitched, a few more gentle but sloppy kisses trailed down your collarbone, the door suddenly flew open.
both of you breaking apart alessia wasted no time taking your hand and yanking you around the corner, both of you ducking out of view as your hands covered one anothers mouths and you heard a few members of staff discussing the plans for today, clearly grabbing some extra yoga mats before they departed, both of you exhaling in relief.
"that was way too close. you have no self control russo!" you smacked her chest, the grin still sitting happily on her face as both of your cheeks were flushed red with heat and your eyes rolled.
"we've still got seven minutes to the meeting and it only takes two and a half to walk there from here?" your girlfriend wiggled her eyebrows making you laugh as she pulled you gently into a much softer kiss, hands falling either side of your face as you sighed happily into her mouth.
"okay! we can continue this tonight." you pulled away and poked her, tugging her hands off and pushing for her to start walking. only you really should have taken into consideration that it was alessia you were dealing with, the girl born with two left feet both ten sizes too big for her body apparently.
so though it was a hardly a rough push, it was enough for your girlfriend to consequently trip over her own feet and go sailing toward the ground, reaching out for a shelf to try and steady herself but instead she only succeeded in pulling that down with her.
you stifled your laugh as she shielded her face and the viles of various essential oils and creams they used for massages came sailing down on top of her, somehow not breaking as finally the noise stopped and you both held your breath for a moment that no one would walk in.
when you heard no footsteps you doubled over laughing, the striker sitting up blushing in embarrassment and smacking your ankle, mumbling that it wasn't funny as she stood to her feet with a huff.
"come on clumsy." you shook your head in amusement, grabbing her hand and guiding her toward the door as she pouted clearly feeling very sorry for herself.
only right as you went to exit you both jumped a foot in the air as another one of the shelves came down, apparently attached to the other and this time the various containers which fell did break with an almighty crash and smash.
you and alessia shared a wide eyed glance and booked it out of the room, your girlfriend pulling you again around a corner and stealing a kiss as you both laughing into one anothers mouths to try and stifle the noise to no luck."
"if kim asks, kyra did it."
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temptaetions · 3 months
Text
cinnamon sugar 🌙 k.sm (m)
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a/n: the photo above is from seungmin's instagram. i don't own the media, but i sure was blessed to see it. anyway, i think this is my first post with like...actual smut in it. please forgive me, because it is so shitty, i'm so bad at writing it. anyway, uhm, enjoy! my anon ask is now on, if you'd like to send any requests in!
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synopsis: her lips taste sweet, like cinnamon sugar...she's such a treat.
genre: best friends to lovers | idiots in love | x fem!reader | smut | fluff | angst
pairing(s): best friend!kim seungmin x virgin!reader
word count: 6k. lowercase intended.
rating: 18+. minors do not fucking interact.
warning(s): swearing, mutual pining, a lot of emotional turmoil from both parties, horribly written smut [between k.sm x reader: unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!!!!), creampie, soft d/s themes, (slight) overuse of pet names (angel, sweetheart) oral (f. receiving), paragraphs of praise, so much kissing, some grinding, the lightest amount of nipple play. riding/missionary, crying during sex, multiple orgasms, reader begs a lot, they stare into each others eyes and hold hands while fucking oh my god]. this is slightly self indulgent but the guilt i feel after writing it, and so badly at that, is overwhelming.
what to listen to: gaze - sweetback | eat it - megan thee stallion | agora hills - doja cat | real love - mary j. blige | whatta man - salt-n-pepa & en vogue
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message from: seungmin🧸🤎
[7:32pm] i’m coming to pick u up, i want a cinnabon.
message to: seungmin🧸🤎
[7:33pm] ur paying 🤑
"can i get aux?" you say as you slide into seungmin's car. the leather of the passenger seat was cool to the touch, a sign that nobody had sat in your self-assigned seat. "hello to you too, best friend. how was my day? oh, it was lovely! it's so nice to see you, too!" "oh, shut up, min. you don't give a shit if i ask those questions or not." you chuckle, snatching his aux cable out of the center console. "you know me so well, fuck. i hate small talk. just merge souls with me." you and seungmin had been best friends for over ten years. he knew you inside and out - from your scalp to the bottom of your feet (including the scar from his razor scooter slamming into your ankle at age sixteen.)
you shared a lot of interests, but none as intense as your love of music and cinnamon rolls. he was always at your dance recitals. your biggest fan, really. he cheered, but never showed you more praise than necessary.
"i need you to stay humble, it helps me tolerate you." he murmured into your hair after one recital last year. you just shook your head in amusement, holding it high as you let him march you to his car for dinner.
"oh, i updated our playlist! i have a few new things on here." you said excitedly as you scrolled through the playlists on your homepage. you shared this love language – you had dozens of collaborative playlists with user ksm922, and you giggled at the ugly photos of the two of you he often used for the covers.
"sure." he shrugs, using his pinky to turn the volume dial up. your eyes trail on his slender fingers as they return to the wheel, but you shake it off just as quickly. pressing play, you let the smooth r&b sounds fill the car.
"oh, this is nice. what is this?" seungmin nods his head along to it, and you glance at the screen. "gaze by sweetback. it played on my sade station, and the vibes are just so kim seungmin, yanno?" you close your eyes and fake being a disc-jockey, his hand coming to pinch your arm lightly, a chuckle playing on his lips. "stop that, you'd be a horrible deejay."
"are you sure this isn't about sex? geez, bub, act like you get some." he teases, and you swat his arm. "i do get some!" "oh yeah? from who?" his eyes are trained on the road as he bullies you about your sex life (or lack thereof), allowing you a moment to stare at his ringed fingers. oh, the way they gripped the wheel, they could so easily grip your neck–
shut up, y/n.
"your mom." you huff, crossing your arms with a pout. you hated this conversation, and you often avoided it with him. yes, seungmin was your best friend, but you never wanted to talk about your sex life with him. he had experiences…and you heard from so many people how good it was.
with him, to be specific.
"what are we, thirteen? you wish my mother would breathe in your direction, you fucking virgin." he scoffs, and you force a snicker out. you glance at your phone, a smirk threatening to escape as it started. "oh, this one is good. turn it up!" he obliged, not even giving the screen a second look.
you settle in your seat as megan thee stallion's voice blares through the speakers, muffling a soft laugh behind your hand. seungmin hated the idea of you being a sexual being, and you often used it to bother him. you liked seeing him get red in the face, and squirm. it doesn't mean you understood it, but it was hilarious.
legs shakin', hit it 'til the bed breaking…bed springing, talk to it…
seungmin's mouth is agape, his cheeks firetruck red…
i don't want just one nut, daddy, i need the whole tree, ah…
…before his nimble fingers press skip. 
"are you serious, y/n? in my christian minecraft server?" his eyes are still fixed on the road, his knuckles turning white from his hold on the steering wheel. weird.
"it's megan! i love her, she's the hot girl coach. you don't want me to be a virgin forever, do you?" you joke, and he scrunches his nose. "since when do you listen to music about getting your…ugh, whatever. don't ever bring up sex appeal, you repulse me." you laugh loudly, your hand going to pinch his cheek softly. "you're so cute when you get flustered, min. here, i'll play pretty boy by the neighbourhood in your honor."
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he can't stop thinking about it. it's been four hours since you played the song in the car, and it's still stuck in his head. well, what he did hear.
you, inherently, did not come across as a sexual being. you didn't, and that wasn't seungmin being just a platonic, nice friend – you genuinely did not care to be the core of anyone's sexual desire. you wore oversized shirts and loose jeans, the occasional dress paired with black pantyhose and boots. "gotta hide my ankles, minnie. that's how they getcha." but thinking about you…listening to that song? your hips winding down on some other man like he's seen you do on stage? hell, some other man's face when he's right here?
it made him sick.
and you were so beautifully unaware as you swirled your fork in your cinnamon roll, bringing the tines to your lips and sucking the icing clean off them. not a second lick or adjustment, just straight off. he felt his cheeks heat as his cock twitched in his pants, and he almost missed you waving your fingers in his face. "yo, you good? you seem distracted." you have a bit of icing on your lip, and he subconsciously reaches over to wipe it off. your eyes are wide as he does so, and he doesn't know why he can't move his thumb from your lip. he doesn't know why everything feels like it's moving in slow motion, and he just watches as you instinctively suck your lip between your teeth at the loss of contact.
you're so pretty, fuck, you're so pretty.
"i'm good. do you want to go?" he's surprised to hear his own voice, and you nod absently. he was acting weird, he knew he was, but he feels like there's a fog in his brain that he can't shake. maybe it was the way he'd memorized every curve of your body, from watching your fluid dances. maybe it was the way that you smiled so innocently, you were so innocent. your eyes big and pure, your heart full, your mind…naïve.
he didn't understand the sudden urge to ruin you, but he knew he had to get over it, and fast.
"fuck." he groans, and your head whips around to look at him. "you okay?"
he nods quickly, his hand landing on the small of your back to guide you to the car faster. "min, if you have to shit, you can just say that." "ugh, shut up. you always say the most unhinged shit. no wonder you can't get laid." he rolls his eyes, and you just laugh. "trust me, it's not for lack of opportunity." you let him open the door for you, and you wink at him playfully, his fingers flicking your forehead before shutting the door. it was true, multiple of your friends had offered to…deflower you. hyunjin, on your dance team. minho, on your production team. felix, your choreographer. even their friends in the music department had offered, and you simply smiled, shaking your head at them. "i just like to flirt, your dick is your problem."
but much like seungmin, they had all seen the way you moved. how easily you sunk to your knees, how smooth your gyrations were, the way you looked like you enjoyed it. you felt good knowing people were attracted to you, but it never compared to what you believed was seungmin's innocent gaze.
it was weird to want more from him, and it pained you, slightly. he was cute, your best friend. cute, experienced, and he knew you. he knew you so well, what could go wrong? he could reject you, that's what.
you're in your own head when you realize the car has been moving, and rather fast, at that. "min, seriously. are you shitting your pants?" you roll your eyes, and he brings the car to a screeching halt. "bro, your brakes." you cringe, covering your ears as he pulls into his driveway.
"are you going to kill me? no way, jisung always said i'd go out this way. please, tell my mother i love her and make sure i get the best spot in heaven." you feign terror as you unbuckle your seatbelt, not noticing the way seungmin can't even look at you. you feel how hard he slams his door, and you give his car a pitiful look as you slide out, following him to his apartment. he lived on the first floor, what a privilege.
he doesn't look at you as he walks into the apartment, tossing his keys onto the kitchen table. "y/n, i have a question."
"oh? mr. attitude has a question, does he?" you smile sarcastically, crossing your arms over your chest, the cowhide leather of the letterman you stole from him in high school rough against your skin. "alright, let's hear it." "why are you still a virgin?" okay, not what you were expecting. don't let it fluster you. you don't really notice his hardened expression as you try to answer. "well…it's just not on my list of priorities. i'll get fucked when i get fucked, you know?"
you shrug, not thinking much of your answer as he steps closer. "hm, i don't buy it."
raising an eyebrow, you shake your head, unbuttoning the jacket. "you're acting so weird, seungmin. if you wanna fuck me, just say that."
you sound surprisingly confident, and you can feel your heart pounding in your ears as you slide the jacket off, draping it over the couch. you gather your hair forward, spinning to speak to him again. "did you still want to watch the mov-" you're cut off by his lips pressing against yours, his hands gripping your hips, pulling you closer. you can't move, your hands frozen as he works you carefully, lips burning against your own. his movements feel desperate, and you let your body take over as you kiss him back, a soft sigh escaping his lips as your tongue slips between them. the kiss is hungry, his hands are digging into you so deeply you're sure you'll bruise. 
he stops. his fingers let go of your hips, and he pulls away, your lips chasing after his as he does. your lip gloss is glittering on his face, before he covers his eyes. "i'm so sorry, y/n. i have no idea what came over me, i…i'm sorry, please, let me take you home."
you can't speak, your mind still swirling with endorphins. your best friend of ten years just made the biggest move on you, and without a word, you managed to fumble it. no way. absolutely not.
"sorry for what? i'm not understanding." you suddenly feel very vulnerable, your skin littering with goosebumps at the sudden change in the air. "i'm perfectly fine with…whatever you were doing."
seungmin peers back at you through dark eyes. "no, y/n. we can't." he swipes his keys off the table, and you huff. "and why can't we, seungmin? what is so bad about kissing me?" his eyes are wide as you ramble, and it's all word vomit. you can't seem to stop it, but he's drinking every word.
"what is it? am i a bad kisser? is it because i'm a virgin? i don't think it's very fair that you can openly admit to being other girls' firsts but you can't even do that for me. you haven't even offered. i'm not saying you fucking have to, because you're my best friend and you always will be. but holy fuck, seungmin, i'm trying to get some. you said i should, so why not be the one i get it from?" 
you're out of breath, and seungmin just shakes his head as he takes one, two steps back in front of you. "you think i don't want to be your first? you think i don't want you all to myself, to ruin you for anyone else? you think i don't want to fuck you stupid, until all you know is my name? are you hearing yourself right now?"
"you're certainly not acting like it. it doesn't have to mean shit, seungmin. it's just sex." you roll your eyes, leaning on the couch. "it's not just sex, y/n. this is a huge step for you, for us. our friendship is on the line, and i don't want to do something you might regret later." you shake your head, and he hates when you get stubborn like this, you won't listen to reason. "still not seeing the issue here. i lose my virginity and gain some experience for the next guy, you get your dick wet. we go to bed, and we act like it didn't happen in the morning. you take me home, we listen to our playlists on the way there, and we go about our days."
he flings his keys onto the floor, his hands reaching to hold your face. he tucks a few strands behind your ears, fingers lovingly caressing your pierced lobes before he looks you dead in the eyes. "y/n, if i give you what you want tonight, there is no chance in hell you're going to fuck someone else."
you stare back at him silently, your eyes darting to his lips before your tongue peeks out to wet your own. it's not the worst thing in the world, being with seungmin. it could be good…and not just the sex. he knows you, you know him…his lips felt like they were made for you. they always had, since your drunken kiss on christmas eve.
"you say that like it's a threat." you challenge, and he bites back a smile, nodding his head. his hand has traveled to your hip, his other still holding your face when his nose touches yours, his breath hitting your lips. "if you want me to stop at any point, just let me know. understand, sweetheart?"
you nod, leaning forward to connect your lips. he pulls back, shaking his head. "i need to hear you say you understand."
"jeez, seungmin, i understand. i get it, can we please move this along?" you're not the least bit embarrassed as you whine against him, and he lets you kiss him. your lips are eager, your hands carding through his hair as he licks into your mouth. the kiss is all teeth and tongue, a soft moan interrupting it as he gives your clothed breast a gentle squeeze, his thumb working over your pebbled nipple. "min, i…" "what, tell me what you want, sweetheart." his lips trail down your jaw, nipping along your exposed neck carefully. your whines are like heaven to him, "n-need you.." "aw, you need me? need me where?" he's loving this, the way you squirm under his lips, under his nimble fingers. you push your chest into him involuntarily, "h-here. please?"
you grab his wrist, a wave of confidence taking over as you guide his hand under the waistband of your sweatpants. his fingers are cool against your clothed heat, a soft wet patch forming on the fabric. his eyes are wide as he instinctively lets his hand run over the spot, watching as you flinch, lip caught between your teeth. he presses hard against you, a gasp falling from your mouth. "i haven't even touched you, and look at how wet you are for me. a little pathetic, hm?" "'m’ yours, minnie. always, always been yours." you don’t mean that, he thinks. he's letting you grind against his hand, his gaze transfixed on your face. your brows furrowed, eyes screwed shut as you used his hand to get yourself to the edge. his cock twitches at the little pants falling from your lips, when he decides he's had enough. you nearly cry at the loss of contact, his hand escaping the confines of your plush thighs. "minnie-" "if you're gonna cum, it's gonna be on my face. let's go, sweetheart." he tugs you towards his bedroom, your legs weak as you try not to stumble behind him. "bed. on your back."
he's pulling his sweater over his head, and you nearly coo at his messy hair in your fucked out state. he feels a flush coat his cheeks as you lay there, waiting for him to tug your pants off. hooking his fingers in your waistband, you lift your hips to make it easier, and he slides your underwear and sweatpants off in one go. you suddenly feel shy, closing your legs. 
"ah, ah. it's just me, sweetheart. do you want to stop?" his hands move to your knees, the cool metal of his rings sending a soft shock to your spine. "no, i'm…okay. i'm just nervous." "it's okay, angel. i got you, don't worry." he presses a kiss to your forehead, nose…lips. he lingers there a bit, but doesn't let it deepen as he runs his hands down your legs. his fingers dig into your thighs, pulling them apart for him to settle between. you're soaking, the heat of his stare making anxiety bubble in your stomach. "fuck, you're going to be the death of me." his lips press soft, chaste kisses along your inner thigh, nipping carefully as you mewl. "minnie, please..i..please…" you end in a whimper, and who is he to deny you when you beg so nicely? he buries his nose in your pussy, bumping your clit as he lets his tongue drag through your folds, collecting your sweet, sweet arousal on his face. your hand flies to his hair as his lips suck on your clit, thighs threatening to close around his head. he doesn't care, he'd die a happy man right there between your legs.
"f-fuck, seungmin, ah! right there, holy f-fuh.." you're shaking around his head, bucking your hips into his face as gently as you can muster. he loves it, but he can't tell you that as he drowns in the scent of you, the obscene sounds of his tongue against you paired with your pretty whimpers ensuring he'd probably cum in his pants. "oh, b-baby i'm gonna.."
his hand reaches for yours, interlacing your trembling fingers with his, his other hand massaging your thigh in encouragement. he can barely bring himself to talk, a soft moan of his against your clit sending you over the edge, a soft cry of his name echoing in the room. "that's it, good job angel. you did so well for me, hm?" he's still lapping at you, not wanting to miss a single shiver or whimper from your body. "s'always that good? min?" he peers up at you from his spot between your legs, your lips parted as you blink, a tear rolling down the side of your face. he moves up to wipe it away, but you take his hand in yours, kissing his palm softly. "you okay? we can stop." he presses his forehead against yours, not able to process your cute gesture without wanting to bawl. you nod, a lazy smile crossing your lips as you reach to kiss him. "m'all good, minnie. do you…want me to help you?"
you can feel his clothed cock pressing against your leg, practically begging to be set free, and you teasingly buck up against it. he inhales sharply, shaking his head, "i want tonight to be about you. i want to make sure you feel good, okay? are you sure you want to continue?" "yeah, m'all yours." you sigh against his lips, a chaste kiss from you to him. "can i take this off, sweetheart?" he yanks lightly on your shirt, and you nod. you help him tug it over your head, your fingers reaching backwards to unclasp your bra. he feels like all the air is sucked out of the room as you lay beneath him, for him, in all your glory. every curve he's imagined just as gorgeous. "you're staring, it's making me shy." your soft voice snaps him out of his thoughts. "no, no, fuck, you're gorgeous. look at you, oh my god, i.." he trails off, his hands resting on your tummy. "you just went down on me, and you're short-circuiting over my tits, kim?" your teasing is not helping his brain, but the attitude brings him back to reality. "you know that's not all it is, stop it." he rolls his eyes, thumbs rubbing circles into your skin. it's soothing, the warmth of your skin radiating against his. he dips his head between your breasts, trailing open mouthed kisses all over your chest and stomach. "you're so beautiful. i'm literally the luckiest person in the entire universe." he's mumbling to himself mostly, but you feel soft tears prick at your eyes. his lips latch around one of your nipples, a gasp from you making him pull off with a pop. "can i…are you sure you want this, y/n? i really, really don't want you to regret this."
you grab his face in your hands, your thumbs lightly padding over his cheeks. "i want you, entirely. in this life, in the next life. okay? i got you, don't worry." you echo his words back to him, and he bites his lip, a hint of something in his eyes as he pulls back to unbuckle his pants. kicking them off quickly, you wait until he straightens to take a peek. 
the rumors were true. he's thick, his tip a soft mauve. your mouth is watering at the sight, when a snap of his fingers catches your attention. "eyes up here, sweetheart. i want you to look at me, can you do that?"
you nod, a shy smile on your lips as he goes to spread your knees again. "no, wait, minnie…" he feels his heart skip a beat at your voice, eyes flickering to yours in concern. "i…can i be on top? i read that…it can be better that way." you swallow thickly, and he feels the tips of ears burn but a smile grazes his features. "you studied for sex?"
any awkwardness is gone. you scoff, a light smack landing on his arm. "forgive me for wanting to be in control."
"you want to be in control? okay. fine, but you won't last long." he shrugs, sliding onto the bed behind you, eyes taking in the curve of your ass before you turn. "lay back, asswipe." "watch the attitude, or i'm shutting this shit down." he says, eyes serious as you feel your cheeks heat. you watch as he gets comfortable on his pillows, and you crawl over to him, your hands brushing against his sides as you straddle him. "we can go as slow as you want, okay?" his words are reassuring as his hands reach for your thighs, and you nod.
you take a deep breath, lightly letting your cunt drag along his length, his tip bumping your clit. you shiver, a buzz going up your legs as he takes your hips in his hands, manually guiding you over his cock. "did you read about this too?"
"shut up." you roll your eyes, his hands holding you in place. he looks…so convincing like this. like everything will go back to normal after this, like everything will be the same. he'll still be your best friend, and you'll still be desperately, hopelessly, stupidly in love with him. it's overwhelming, and you just bite your lip, shaking your head. "you're staring." "your dick is twitching, but i'm not saying shit." scoffing, you take him in your hand gently, lining him up with your aching center. you sink down slowly, the tip barely swiping your entrance when you grimace, a hiss escaping your lips as you screw your eyes shut. "i know, angel. here, let me help you." seungmin pulls you closer, his back against his headboard, careful not to pull out. you watch as his hand snakes between the two of you, his thumb softly circling your clit, your eyes threatening to close. "eyes open." you oblige, feeling a gush of arousal at his command, and you have no room to feel embarrassed when he begins to shallowly fuck into you, matching the pace of his thumb. your eyes are glossy as you move your hands to hold onto the headboard, your chest flush to his face. he kisses your shoulder, your soft whimpers music to his ears. 
"deeper? or stay like this?" he asks, voice shaking slightly, the warmth of your pussy almost staggering. it's humiliating how worked up you have him, but you need to stay humble. it helps him tolerate you. "d-deeper, is okay."
his arms wrap around your waist tightly, slowly pulling you down further, a whine escaping your throat as your hands move to his shoulders, your eyes meeting his. he's trying not to cum from the way your pretty cunt swallowed him so perfectly, taking him so well. made for him, just him. "m'so full, minnie." you clench around him, and it takes all his willpower not to finish. he's not far, he's practically seeing stars…but the way you're looking at him, you're so pretty, so ready to cry over his cock. he needs to drag this out as long as he can.
"y-you can move, if you want. p-please, want to feel you." you're pleading, he knows. he swallows, confidence wavering as he nods, slowly thrusting up into you, the squelch immediately catching his attention, eyes tearing from yours. he watches the way you take him, your body begging to be ruined by him. he moves a little faster, your mind beginning to blur as he falls into a rhythm. 
your nails are digging into his shoulders, your lip caught between your teeth as his hips rock against yours. his eyes flicker back to your face, and you manage a quick wink. he feels his cheeks burn beet red as he looks away. he feels like such a fucking virgin, when he is the one that's your first, not the other way around. pretty girl on his lap and he can't even look at you.
he wishes you had been his first, too, and he wishes you would have asked him sooner. you're so smart, you're so gorgeous, your lips taste like cinnamon sugar. fuck, he loves you. you're his best friend, you feel so good around him and you know him so well. he loves you, so fucking much.
his hips come to a slow, your moan drawing out as he drags his cock against your walls at an agonizing pace. "'still want to be in control, angel?" his lips press to your clavicle, and you nod against his neck. "will you tell me if it's good?"
he pulls you back, hand coming up to caress your face. "how could it not be, when it's you?"
you don't say a word, allowing his lips to meet yours in a chaste kiss. he slumps a bit, and you maneuver so his back is almost flat on the bed, and you try not to moan as the movement makes his cock hit you just right. "whenever you're ready, just use me how you want to." you feel a flutter in your stomach, giving an experimental roll of your hips, your hands flat on his side. raising your hips, your thighs tremble as you start a rhythm, bouncing on him carefully. he's watching you, the way you move so fluidly, like you're dancing. like you're enjoying him, using him, making his brain feel useless. he can't speak, just drinking in this picture of you he's never going to get to see again after tonight, taking in your throaty moans.
"m-minnie?" your eyes are low, your hands moving to his chest, pushing your breasts together. fuck, you are art. "y-yeah?" 
he can't even focus as you whimper, clamping around him like a vice, moving slightly faster. "m'close, i can't..i.." you're still looking at him, and he can't. he can't take it, using his strength to flip you on your back. he interlaces your fingers, pinning your hands above you as he roughly fucks into you, sharp cries falling from your lips.
his head dips, lips dragging along your jaw as he whispers in your ear. "this is where you belong. under me, begging for me. got it?"
you feel chills cover your body as you nod, "y-yes, god, yes." "good girl." he's so unsure of himself, he's so afraid he'll scare off your high but he needs to know. "did you mean what you said earlier?" he's speaking through gritted teeth, his eyes focused on the gloss in your eyes.
"hmm?" your brows furrow, your bitten lips slightly agape as his thrusts become sloppy, and he just shakes his head, opting to kiss you instead. hoping it'll help the knot in his stomach go away, hoping it will help you forget he asked. you can't help but pant into his mouth, feeling him smile against your lips. "you can let go, sweetheart. you did so well for me, yeah? i got you." you don't register how tightly you squeeze his fingers, or how deeply you're kissing him as you feel the white hot sensation rip through you. he's drunk off you, and you can feel him spurting inside you, his cum trickling out of you as his thrusts come to a slow, slow, stop.
but he doesn't, his lips don't. he can't stop kissing you, he doesn't want to talk. he doesn't want to tell you how you made him feel, how he can never see you the same again. he doesn't want to watch you walk out of his apartment tonight and possibly never be able to talk you again. he doesn't want to ever, ever hear about you doing this with some other guy, but he made his bed. 
your thighs are trembling around him, and you tug your fingers out of his grasp, pulling as far away from his mouth as you physically can. he pouts, chasing after them, only stopping when your eyes blink slowly at him.
"you alright?" his voice is soft, almost scared. you nod, swallowing thickly as you look away, tears forming in your eyes. "ah, talk to me, y/n. it's okay." "i meant it. what i said, earlier. i…don't know why i said it, i never planned on saying it. i'm sorry if it's going to make things awkward." you feel a tear escape, your hand quickly pawing it away. "awkward? with you? it’s not possible." he murmurs, and you glance at him, but he's staring at the pillows above your head.
"but you don't feel the same way." you say, almost as if you're trying not to hurt your feelings by letting your own words reject you, instead of him. he shifts, and you realize he's still inside you. he props himself up on his elbows, hands holding his head up as he peers at you. "you think i don't?"
"i know you don't." you laugh coldly, and he smiles. "yeah, miss sex expert? you know everything? did you read that, too?"
"ugh, stop. i'm never telling you anything again." you're becoming increasingly aware of your nudity, and seungmin can feel the hot flame of shame creeping up his back. he shakes his head, hating the way his blushing cheeks burn so bright. "i want you to tell me everything, forever. i love knowing you, i love trusting you. i'm glad you trusted me with this."
you can't look at him. his hand moves to make you look at him, fingers lightly squeezing your jaw. "and i meant what i said, too. you can't fuck anyone else. only i can see you like this, okay?"
his eyes are searching your face, watching you attempt to nod. "and…" he sighs, feeling tears prick at his eyes. "and i love you. i love your smile, and how you laugh when you play sex songs in the car. i love when we split cinnamon rolls, because you always try to take the bigger piece as if i won't just let you have it. i love when you say my name because it rolls so nicely off your tongue. i love how you move so effortlessly, and how you remember every little thing about anyone, ever. i love that you're funny, and you're so passionate. i love that you're so smart, far too smart to think that i wouldn't sell my soul to live an eternity by your side." his voice is trembling, and your eyes are wide and full of tears, full of adoration, of love for the stupid boy hovering above you.
"i love you, please. please say you're mine." his tears spill, and your lips part, a soft sob escaping as you pull him close, the cool metal of his necklace dragging against your damp skin. "i'm yours, always. i'm yours, i'm yours, i'm yours. i love you." you mumble against his lips, your tears mixing with his on your cheeks.
"thank fuck, i was about to end it all thinking about you doing that fucking trick on someone else." he mutters, and you snort as he buries his face. "that wasn't in the article, funnily enough. it just felt like the right thing to do. think if i pierced my clit, it'd feel better for you?" you ponder aloud, and he nips at your skin.
"don't even start, i haven't even pulled out." he groans, and you laugh loudly. "you're so pretty." he pouts, and rolls his eyes as they start filling with tears, your hand quickly wiping the ones that spilled. "is this going to happen every time? i kind of hate it."
"god, i hope so. i love seeing you like this for me." you tease, and he scrunches his nose. "shut up. stay humble, it's the only way i tolerate you." he nuzzles his nose back into your neck, and you let him stay there, carding your fingers through his hair.
"y/n?"
"yes, seungmin?" "i'm yours, you know that?"
"mmm, i do now. just mine?" "just yours. always." he nods as he pulls himself off you, placing a kiss on your temple, before brushing his lips on the shell of your ear. "someone has to fuck the attitude out of you, and i'm so glad it's gonna be me." you feel your skin heat at his words, and you smack him lightly. he gives a playful thrust, making you gasp before slowly pulling out. "you're off the hook for now, my angel. let's get you cleaned up." he doesn't stop kissing your face in the shower, or when he's shampooing your hair. he doesn't stop kissing your shoulders as he towels you dry, or your tummy when he works lotion into your skin. he can't keep his hands off you, even when you say you need to put clothes on. he can't get enough of the burn of your skin against his, and moves as fast as a human possibly can stripping the sheets off his bed and replacing them. 
he can't stop, and he won't stop kissing you, splitting cinnamon rolls with you, or singing sex songs in the car. he can't stop, and he won't stop, supporting you at your recitals and fucking you stupid as a reward. he can't stop, and he won't stop filling your cup until it's overflowing, making you laugh until you cry, and dragging moans of his name from your throat.
he can't stop, and he will never stop, loving you.
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psychwxrdd · 3 months
Text
drug dealer! soft! rafe being a love sick puppy
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🎀 author's note: buzzcut rafe is my favorite rafe omg 😫 yk that one song "i'm a gangster's wife to an anybody killer" i had that lyrics on my head all day and it got me inspired lol and as much as i love dark/horror themes i love soooo much soft and sweet! rafe. yeah a canon of him being a drug dealer but he still is my little princess
(not mine gif)
also besties send me requests! i'm in the mood to write today
warnings: fluff, sexual mentions in the end but no actual smut
drug dealer! rafe instantly became infatued with you, the second he first saw you. he just knew he had to have you (please i can't help but imagine him staring like that one crazy stare he does in s2 when he's with barry and hears kiara in the drain lol)
drug dealer! rafe absolutely fucking worships you. like i MEAN it. he's selling his thing and worried about his busy and can't stop thinking about you, constantly texting you under the table. he has sooooo many pictures of you, not just on his phone but in his wallet as well, it's almost compulsive: he wants needs to stare at it all the time, and everyone always mocks him for this. he doesn't care about how crazy or corny they think he is or shit, thats his girl, the love of his life, his future wife and mother of his children. he would go to hell for you.
drug dealer! rafe who spoils the shit out you, if you said you wanted a big house like this or that, in color x or y, he would buy it entirely for you, the exact way you wanted. needless to say, he would buy anything you saw in a store that had your eyes shining, no matter what it is, if it would make you happy he wouldn't think twice. also, he is obsessed with the cute things you like 🥺 like imagine him buying a sylvanian family for you, or those sanrio plushies.
drug dealer! rafe who has you on his lap at any single party him and barry goes to, he doesn't let go of you for nothing. one say overprotective other say clingy, whatever it is, he always wants you on his arms. need to go to bathroom? he is waiting on the door. need a drink? he tells barry to got get it for you both (LMAO). you're tired or sleepy? he carries you around like a bride.
drug! dealer rafe taking you home and can't stop smiling staring at you sleeping, admiring your beauty and feeling his heart race from how much he loves you, how happy it feels to have you. he puts a song you like on the radio even tho it wasn't his taste or you weren't awake to hear it. you'd wake up and he'd be caressing your hair, the minute he he saw your eyes opening he said "shh, go back to sleep princess, it's late" and you were too sleepy to answer anything. he caressed your forehead, cheeks, nose, ears. he loved to put his fingers on your dots too, you had some small ones you didn't even noticed you have, but he did.
drug dealer! rafe already has a ring on his pocket just waiting for the perfect moment to ask you to marry him. you're the only person who ever gets to see this side of him, so he would probably get emotional while doing it.
drug dealer! rafe who have a MASSIVE breeding kink, but mostly because he really dreamed of having a family with you. not just because it felt good to cum inside you and it was hot, but because he really felt something he couldn't describe at the thought of you also wanting him to be the dad of your children, to have a family with him. it made his heart euphoric, it got him acting dumb. it meant you also wanted to spend your life with him, that was his biggest turned on.
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fiendishfables · 3 months
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hii i just saw ur request page and thought i'd give it a try! soo, can i please have an nsfw oneshot w/dom! lucifer x reader ? i've just been thirsting after him sm...
anyways can it be about like him going down on reader, or just being talented with his fingers, cus we know what he can do with em 🫣
thanks so much!!
a/n: ahh, yes, thank you so much, my lovely, for sending in this request! This is my first attempt at responding to a request, so I hope its to your liking and doesn't disappoint. We love Luci!
warnings: nsfw, sex, cursing, use of pet names, first time as a couple, Luci being a complete dork
word count: 1.2k+
characters: 6646
notes: This is my first fic on here, as well as my first attempt at writing smut, so I apologize if its not any good. But nevertheless, enjoy!
Dom! Lucifer Morningstar x GN! Reader
Oneshot
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Going down on you was something Lucifer had wanted to do the day he first laid eyes on you.
Don't get him wrong, he was a gentleman at heart and would continue to be until the day someone replaced him as King (which you both knew would never happen), but by the fiery skies of Hell- he wanted you. You. No other soul.
Lucifer had met you through Charlie, his own daughter and Princess of Hell. Your kindness had lead you to offer your services with helping his daughter with her whole idea of a rehabilitation hotel, meant for the sinners who wanted a second chance at life; wanting to fix their mistakes and be evolved into a better version of themselves. He had met you there when she had invited him to visit and see her progress. Its safe to say you two hit it off perfectly fine.
Now, exactly how you two hit it off doesn't really matter- all that mattered to you right now was the fact that his cock was buried so deep inside of you, that you could barley form a coherent sentence, let alone a singular word.
The room was dark, making the moonlight that filtered through the curtains the only source of light; the only thing that allowed for you to see the beautiful fallen angel hovering over you, both of your bodies sweaty and hearts pounding rapidly against your ribcages, as if trying to silently connect with one another through rapid pumps of blood. To express your emotions to one another through anything other than what he was doing now, which was stuffing you to the brim with his cock.
When you first saw it, staying quiet had become a big concern to you in your mind, what with the other residents of the hotel potentially being able to hear you both.
But that fear had quickly flown the coop as soon as he entered you for the first time.
Fuck, it was absolute heaven.
You were convinced that somehow, Lucifer had managed to descend the heavens down upon you in that exact moment; your most intimate moment. That any second, angels would be surrounding the pair of you and begin serenading you with a specific love song just for the two of you, or pointing angelic spears at your throats. Now, that thought did cause some momentary fear to shoot through your body, because the last thing you wanted was for some random angels (especially if they were exorcists, or Adam) to randomly appear in the room, just to be greeted with the sight of you, a moaning mess underneath Lucifer, drunk off of his length as it stretched you so wide you were afraid he might break you. But when you opened your eyes after the so slow, yet so delicious insertion of his cock...the room was still pitch black. No holy light. No angles. No song. Just you and him. You and Lucifer.
And that was the way it was supposed to be. No other soul, no matter angelic or demonic, could compete with what you two had. It was special; a connection that had to reach from the deepest pits of Hell, to the brightest place in all of Heaven.
For being one of the most powerful beings, Lucifer was being very careful with you; his fingers gripped your sides and hips, holding you in place securely as he rutted into you. Those fingers were sure to leave marks tomorrow. Neither of you minded.
"Oh...you're the best choice I've ever made, lovely- fuck..~"
Lucifers words only helped to fuel the fire that burned within your heart; the fire that represented your eternal, undying love for him. The tightening in your abdomen became much more noticeable too, coiling and constricting like a snake fighting to escape its confinements, or the talons of a predatory bird.
Except in this scenario, Lucifer was the bird, who held you oh so tightly in his sharp talons, and the last thing you wanted to do was escape. You'd allow him to devour you to his hearts content; until you passed out, fainted, or hell, till your heart stopped. He had you right where he wanted you and the smug little smirk on his lips whilst he turned you into this blabbering mess, was enough proof to show he knew it too. And he enjoyed it. Every. Single. Second.
His hands stayed perched seriously on your hips, as if you might just disappear if he so much as dared to loosen his hold. Not that you minded. You could hardly think straight.
"L-Luci..-"
Your attempt at saying his name fell flat, his next thrust replacing the messy words with a desperate moan from you, making your eyes roll back into your skull and a tremor of pleasure trailing its way through your body. He could reach places inside you that no one else had ever even dared to try. He was special in that way. Although he did lessen his movements after your butchered attempt at speaking. He looked genuinely worried and the sight did just enough to melt your heart.
"Are you alright, love? I didn't hurt you did I? Do you need anything? Do I need to stop? I can get you-"
He started to ramble, which he often did. His worst nightmare was hurting you; even just thinking about it made him shudder, as if he had just been doused with cold water.
But all it took was a weak smile from you and a kiss on his cheek to calm him and get him back in the movement again. You assured him that you were feeling the best you've ever felt in your entire life, both in living and in death, that all the pleasure you were feeling was making it hard for you to speak properly.
"I'm okay, Luci. You're just making me feel so many things-"
A finger then found its way onto your plush lips, slightly moisturized by your saliva having been produced by your fucked out state.
"Shhh, spare your breath, darling. I'm just glade you're holding up so well. Such a good beloved, you are."
Then: "You'll want it for when I make you scream."
Seeing you an absolute wreck because of him- because of his actions- his cock- it was almost better than the orgasm that ripped through him shortly after you came undone due to his words and continuation of his previous actions.
Ropes of his seed shot into you, stuffing you like you've never experienced before. His pale blonde hair stuck to his forehead, both your bodies damp with a light sheen of sweat. Your heavy breaths mixed together, as did the small chuckles that came from both of your lips. Thankfully, he kept his promise about making you scream.
Hell, meeting you had to have been the best thing to ever happen to him. To both of you.
No one would ever find themselves as to be so lucky, to know that the King of Hell found the taste of them the most enchanting out of all the souls both above and below.
Just try and doubt his love for you. He will be sure to give you a night that you won't ever forget, as many times as he needs to, until you're begging him to stop.
You are his, and he refuses to ever let you forget it.
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luveline · 1 year
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𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐩𝐡𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐚 | 𝐚𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐞𝐫
Hotch touches your face much more than a boss should. Or, 5 times you have a nosebleed +1 time Hotch does.
8k words, a slightly bloody coworkers to lovers, fem!reader, nosebleeds, reader works in the BAU but isn't a profiler, jack is a sweetheart, hotch has game fr, fluff + hurt/comfort
༺༻
You like your desk job. You handle paperwork primarily, and act as a sort of assistant unofficially. Anything to be useful — you get paid either way. It's why you don't mind trying to be helpful in the office and take on some of the office administrator's overflow. 
Today, that's fixing the coffee machines. The office can function on one at a stretch but both being broken means an entire roster of grumpy agents and all of them are on your back. And when they have to see all the stuff they say? You figure fixing the coffee machines is the least you can do. 
You're ignoring the weight of their waiting, elbow deep in one of the machines. The instruction manual had mentioned a little spout that can get clogged with detriment. Hopefully, you can clean it out and get at least one machine working by midday. 
"Oh no," you murmur. 
The piece you're trying to unscrew is tightly wound, too tight for your fingers to work behind. You're probably going to need a small tool, like an allen key. 
"No luck?" Agent Prentiss asks, sounding defeated. 
You look up from the machine and smile quickly. "I need smaller hands," you joke, letting the machine sit back on the counter and pulling out your aching fingers. "I'll have one working by the end of the day, Agent Prentiss. Scout's honour." 
She shrugs and waves a hand at you. "It's alright. What's one day without caffeine?" 
You laugh at her good-natured sarcasm and go back to your machine. When you're certain you can't jimmy it you turn your attention to the second machine and run through the steps. You're too determined to lose. Your coworkers depend on you. 
You start by changing the filter and are unsurprised when that doesn't work. You check the button connectivity, the fuse, and then you turn again to that small piece that needs to be washed. 
"Yes," you cheer under your breath, pulling the piece from its home to assess the problem. 
It's a tiny pipe with a piece of mesh that acts as a sieve to trap dust. Maybe. Whatever it is, it's full of caramelised coffee grounds. You move to the sink basin and turn on the faucet to clean it, washing with anticipation as the burned coffee trickles down the drain. 
You're pleased enough to feel a mild adrenaline rush, and your excitement leads to butter fingers: you drop the prized piece of pipe and it rolls out of sight.
This is not a good time for business casual. 
You tug your too-tight pants from your thighs and bend down in search. When it doesn't reveal itself you get on your knees and run your hands along the seams of the kitchen cabinets, face lowered. 
"Is everything okay?" 
You wince at a very familiar, very unfortunately timed voice. 
"Yes, sir, everything is perfect," you say, looking up to meet the eye of your boss' boss, unit chief SSA Aaron Hotchner. "I've misplaced a piece but I'll have the coffee machine working again in no time. I'm sorry." 
He raises his eyebrows at you. It's a very nice expression on him, his eyes light with an emotion you don't often see on him. "Is fixing the coffee machine in your job description?" he asks. 
You think it might be a polite reprimand. You won't insult him by insisting you're always on time with your actual delegated workload because he and your supervisor have to send you emails asking for missing paperwork all the time, so you try to disarm him. 
You beam. 
You're not a supermodel but everybody is pretty when they smile. "Sir, I thought I could sacrifice my lunch break for the good of the Bureau." 
"Yes, well." He looks like he wants to smile back. You might be seeing what you want to see, though. "That won't be necessary. Take your time." 
Your smile falters as you feel a telling heat at the back of your nose. "Thank you," you say quickly, covering your nostril with the pad of your index finger. 
You're hoping your swift words will send him on his way, but he's literally the lead profiler of the BAU. He knows suspicious activity when he sees it.  
"Is something wrong?" 
Blood starts to trickle down your palm. You slide your hand up to cover your nose the best that you can. The alarm on his face when he spots the blood sliding down your bare forearm can't be understated. 
"It's just a nosebleed," you placate, sounding stuffed up. 
He's a quick thinker, tearing a wad of paper towel off of the dispenser above the microwave and offering it to you.
If you weren't so distracted by your current predicament you'd say thank you. 
He turns back to the paper towels and tears off another wad. To your horror, Hotch bends down right there in the kitchenette and waits for you to open your palm, feeding the towels into your spare hand. 
"Should you tilt your head back?" 
"I think that's a myth," you say. 
Your skin starts to scrawl with embarrassment, the itchy, awful feeling of being pinned by his eyes. 
"How long do they usually last?" 
"Not very long, sir. I'm sure you're busy." 
He tilts his head slightly to one side as if conceding your point. "Let me help you up," he commands. 
You can't make yourself reject his help. Honestly, it's nice to have somebody care even if the nosebleed is purely superficial. His fingers curl around the crook of your elbow and he helps you onto your feet just in time for Agent Prentiss to return.
"Hotch, what did you do?" she asks, bewildered. 
You try not to laugh too much, worried you'll force another burst of blood. 
Confidential information. You hear it, you ignore it. Harder to ignore the whiteboards in the conference room that are currently choc-a-block with prints of crime scene photos. 
You don't mean to gawk at them. It's severely unprofessional and you shouldn't really be in here to begin with. The electronic screen is off, as are the monitors, so you know the room isn't in use. 
That could change any second, and it does. 
You hide your clammy palms behind your back at the sound of footsteps and try not to rush obviously toward the mug you'd come in here to collect. 
The door creaks open as you're leaning over the table. 
"I'm sorry," you say without looking. 
"You don't have to clean up after anyone." 
"Actually," you say quietly, abashed at having been caught, "this is my mug." 
You turn to face him. 
Agent Hotchner is tall and handsome. These are two undeniable facts and yet every time you see him it feels like a surprise. It might have something to do with how composed he is, how deliberate his movements are, or it might just be 'cause you have a crush on him. 
It's anybody's guess.
"I can make Reid wash it," he says. 
You're so whipped that your chest confuses his offer for something much worse. Like, he's on your side.
"That's okay, I don't wanna punish him for my own fussiness." You cover the mugs printed sides subtly, or as subtly as you're able. 
"What's special?" 
You smile at him, lips pressed together tight and eyes squinting slightly. You know what he's getting at but you ask anyways, stalling now he's caught you. "About what?" 
"About the mug." 
You peer behind him. 
"You can't tell anyone," you murmur, rounding the table to stand by his side with your shoulders to the door. "I'm not sure anybody knows it's mine." 
The mug is a corn-husk yellow and printed with a scene from a vintage Peanuts comic, dark-haired Lucy standing behind her lemonade stand that boasts 'Psychiatric Help 5¢'. Charlie Brown sits in front of it looking morose. 
It's hard to describe why you like it so much. 
"I see," Agent Hotchner says. 
It's become something of an office joke, offering each other five cents on bad days, calling someone Charlie Brown when they look lost. You doubt very much that anyone is making fun of you, you're just hiding that it's your mug because that's part of the fun. The mystery of the Peanuts mug. 
"I can't drink out of anything else," you confide, turning your face to his. 
He's definitely smiling this time. "Why would you?" 
You nod in genuine delight. "Exactly! Vintage Peanuts, and I searched so much for this because they used to use lead in glassware paint, and-" 
The nosebleed comes on suddenly. There's a drop of blood running down your lips before you've even realised. Agent Hotchner's eyes follow it all the way down. 
"Oh, no," you say, blood dripping to the hill of your chin. 
You use the back of the hand that's holding the mug to catch what's rolling down your neck and the other to pinch your nose closed, bending forward on instinct to hide your face. You're seasoned in nosebleeds. You know how you look — scary. Ridiculous. 
"Here," Agent Hotchner says. 
His hand comes into your eyeline, offering a dark square of fabric. You cringe at the idea of marring his likely expensive handkerchief but you can't not accept, pressing it haphazard to your bloody nose. 
"What were you saying about lead?" 
You're so frazzled about the blood you don't realise he's made a joke until it's too late to laugh.
"Do you know what causes them?" he asks. 
"I'm not really sure, sir. I used to get them all the time as a kid, um…" You pull the handkerchief away from your nose to check if it's still bleeding. When it doesn't continue, you say, "They're pretty harmless. It's done already." 
"If you need time off for a check-up, I'm sure the office administrator can find a sick day for you." 
You smile at him, and then remember the blood and grimace. I must look like Carrie right now, you think morosely. 
"That won't be necessary, sir, thank you. It's apparently the dry air." You're starting to feel more and more warm under his serious gaze. There's a startling amount of concern there. "I'm gonna go clean up now. Excuse me," you say, face glowing with heat. 
"Of course."
You cover your bloody face with the back of your hand, his handkerchief held in red-stained fingers. You pass Agent Prentiss on the stairs, hurrying past her with an I'm okay smile. 
"Hotch, again?" you hear Agent Prentiss ask incredulously. "Where do you get off?"
You can't return Hotch's handkerchief, it's a biohazard, but the fabric had felt so soft and the monogram in the corner had cued you in on how expensive it must have been. Your guilt manifests itself into three new handkerchiefs with the embroidered A.H. They aren't half as nice as the one he'd let you ruin. You leave them on his desk — or rather, you get Dr. Reid to leave them on his desk, as walking into his office doesn't feel like something you're allowed to do — and try to forget about them. 
For a week, you do. Agent Hotchner doesn't visit his office, Agent Jareau apprehends him on his way in that morning and the profiling team gather around their round table, and you don't see any of them for four days. The Friday they return, you're already on your way home. 
That's why his actions the following Monday shock you. 
It's unusual that he walks anywhere that isn't a straight shot to his desk. You're doing paperwork for once in your life, sitting awkwardly with your foot hooked under your thigh and a pair of wired earphones in. It's not technically allowed but he really doesn't venture over to you often. You've become complicit in your unsupervised nirvana of a desk job. 
You snatch your earphone out and struggle into a normal position. "Agent Hotchner," you say, wondering if you should call him Special Supervisory, or maybe something cooler, like your Highness. Your grace. He's intimidating in his accomplishments at the FBI, and he's super handsome. 
"Can I see you in my office? Ten minutes." 
You nod brainlessly. 
Your desk buddy doesn't wait long after he's left to investigate. 
"What did you do?" they ask from across the short partition. 
"I really don't know," you say, though you have your suspicions. 
"Were you reading on your computer again? I told you, read under the desk like a normal person." 
"No, I learned my lesson with that one when Agent Morgan started reciting Pride and Prejudice from over my shoulder." 
You check your face in a compact before you report to Agent Hotchner's office. Your heart beats in your throat as you knock his open door. 
"Come in," he says without looking up. 
You take a cautious step. 
He finishes off quickly and lifts his chin. His eyes are dark in the early morning light, his hair in mild disarray from the wind and drizzle. 
"Come in," he says again. 
You wish there was a word that could describe his voice accurately. He talks in the peaceable kind of cadence that comes with hushed tones without truly being hushed. 
"Sir…" You bite the bullet. "If this is about the macadamia cookies, I promise I'll replace them. I didn't actually eat any of them. They kind of fell out of the cabinet and exploded, it was a freak accident." 
He holds up his hand. "Thank you. For the handkerchiefs. They were unnecessary." 
He says 'unnecessary' with a smile. 
"Actually, sir, I think they were entirely necessary." You just disagreed with your boss. "Sir. I couldn't return the first, I ruined it and I- I didn't think you'd want it even if I got it dry cleaned." 
He raises his eyebrows. "It was unnecessary," he repeats, the word drawn out carefully. "But, I appreciate the gesture. Thank you." 
Two thank you's. You stop while you're ahead. "You're more than welcome, Agent Hotchner, sir." 
You share an amicable glance and turn to leave. 
"L/N?" 
You stutter to a halt. "Sir?" 
"Hotch is fine." 
You try not to swallow your own tongue. "Hotch," you say, and then worry that's something people only do in movies. 
A few days later, your humming along to your earphones and wading through the chaos of the bullpen feeling pretty happy. The office has been busy but not in the scary, suffocating way, and you're happy to be here. The BAU can be hard (and that's as someone who isn't on the front line). Times like this are cherished. 
You pause a foot from your desk, eyes creasing into a suspicious squint. 
There's a small box on your desk. 
"What is that?" you ask your desk buddy. 
"What?" they ask.
"That. There's a thing on my desk." 
"Nothing to do with me." 
"Think I should call the bomb squad?" 
"I'm sure you'll be alright. Maybe read the note before you raise the alarm." 
"There's a note?" you mumble, caution swiftly overrun by a burning curiosity. 
You'd be sincerely worried about a bomb, only this is the FBI. If a bomb got this far into the building half the people in it would lose their jobs. You kick your bag under the desk and drop your ipod onto the desk, tinny music blaring from your earphones. 
"What are you?" you ask under your breath. 
The box is wrapped in crepe paper and a yellow sticky note has been attached to the top. 
Rest assured, made without lead. 
That only confuses you more. You're hesitance has your desk mate sitting up in their chair. "Wait," they say, peering over the glass partition, "should I raise the alarm?" 
You slide a trim fingernail under a neat stripe of tape. "No, I think we're good," you mumble. 
And lo and behold, a mug is homed inside. A Peanuts mug no less; the mug has been printed with a Peanuts comic panel. Charlie Brown lays on the floor in a straight plank, and standing overy him is his friend Linus, who says, "I have been asked to tell you that your cries of anguish are keeping the whole neighbourhood awake!" 
You laugh loud and instinctively, shrill enough to attract the attention of half the office. Slapping a hand over your mouth, you slouch down as low as possible in your desk chair. Heat pools in your cheeks. 
"What is it?" your desk mate asks. 
"A present." 
And hence your new favourite mug is brought into life. You write your name on the bottom with black sharpie and continue to deny all knowledge of the first, which you retire to the drawer of your desk. 
For a while your nosebleeds go away. You know exactly who left the mug on your desk, and you remember the joke he'd made. Maybe Hotch had been on to something, and you'd inadvertently poisoned yourself.
You smile practically every time you see your new mug, and you're unsurprised when others appreciate its humour. 
You're not sure how to explain it to an eight year old, though. 
You're slumped over, nose to the desk and hand working diligently across your notes. Having a crush on your boss makes doing your work easier because you're constantly trying to impress him — an impossible task, but trying all the same. Your earphones bump a soft love song, something sweet to cut through the unhappy details of the case file you're working on. 
"What are you listening to?" a small voice asks. 
You drag your gaze up slowly and find Jack Hotchner standing beside your desk. You've seen him in person a few times, and once as Hotch's phone wallpaper, but he grows so much between visits you almost don't recognise him. 
"I'm sorry," you say, pulling your earphone out, "what did you say?" 
"What song are you listening to?" he asks, hands creeping up over the lip of your desk. 
You sit up and smile at him. You can't say he looks like Hotch, though maybe you can see it in his tiny grin, that hint of cheekiness. "I'm listening to a song called At Last. It's a love song. Do you… want to listen?" you offer quietly. 
He nods. 
You push your chair away from your desk and turn down the ipod's volume so it doesn't damage his hearing. "Here," you say, offering one of your earbuds. "Don't push it in, okay? I don't want it to hurt your ears." 
Jack takes the proffered earbud but doesn't seem super interested. "Do you have The Beatles?" he asks. 
"The Beatles! Is that what you and your dad listen to?" 
He nods, pleased, and you nod yourself, flicking through your songs in search of what he wants. 
"I have Here Comes the Sun. Do you like that one?" 
He beams. "Yes! Me and dad sing that one in the car." 
That's a really nice image, Hotch and Jack belting happy lyrics together in the busy mornings. It's also odd. Hotch singing isn't an image you can say you've ever thought of before. 
"I love this one," you tell him, letting your elbows dig into your thighs so the two of you are eye level with one another. 
"Me too." 
You share the earbuds, Jack combing your desk for something interesting no doubt. You cover a case detail that involves some gory images and almost knock over your mug in your haste. 
"What does that say?" he asks, pointing. 
Jack looks between you and the mug for answers. 
You lick your lips. "Uh, do you want me to read it to you?" 
He thinks about it. "Can I try?" 
"Of course you can." 
You clear a path for the mug and place it in front of him. 
"I have been asked to tell you," he begins confidently, "that your cries of an-" He frowns. "Anguish are keeping the whole ne… I don't know that." 
"I'm sure you do, it just looks weird. Neighbourhood." 
"Neighbourhood," he repeats. "Keeping the whole neighbourhood awake." He huffs a boyish, gentle laugh that makes your heart spin. 
"Good job, buddy." 
He melts under your praise. He's a cute kid, and his hair shines golden under the office lighting. It flops to one side as he tilts his head. "What's 'anguish'?" 
"Anguish. Uhm, it's like sadness." 
"Oh." He takes this in. "Do you have Let It Be?" 
You eventually give up your chair and let Jack sit with your ipod in his lap, playing through all The Beatles songs that you have. Nobody seems to be watching you and Hotch has yet to come out of his office and tell you off for supplying his son with technology, so you work around him, leaning over the back of the chair to fill in what's missing from your reports. 
Jack leans back in his chair, his adorable singing coming to a stop. "Do you have movies on the computer?" 
Yes, but should my boss' son know that? "It's for work," you say regretfully. 
"Not even FernGully?"
"I'm sorry." 
He shakes his head. "It's okay, it's not your fault."
"Do you like to draw? I don't have many colours, but we can play a game." 
He smiles for a moment, then hesitation crawls over his features. "Dad says not to disturb anyone." 
"I'm on my lunch break," you assure him. You hadn't been, but you don't mind taking it now. "Are you hungry? I have oranges." 
You and Jack end up sitting under your desk. You really don't mean to end up like that; you sit on your knees because your back has started to ache and Jack wants to sit with you. You can't say no to him. (You could, you just don't want to.)
"What did she say after that?" you ask, fingers digging into two orange segments to pull them apart. You shave off all of the strands of white pith before you pass it to Jack, who says thank you every time. 
"She said to ask Stacy who said to ask Morgan P who said to ask Joan. And Joan said she didn't wanna know, but then she changed her mind after I told her abd she said to ask Cooper." 
"What did Cooper say?" 
"Cooper says he doesn't think he knows where it is." 
You nod, chewing your own orange slice slovenly. "Well, what did your dad say?" 
"I haven't told dad." 
You lift your head from the paper where Jack has drawn an impressive house with five windows. "You haven't told your dad?" 
"He worries about everything." 
"That's his job, Jack. He has to worry about you." 
"He worries about everybody." 
"Some people do." You clean another orange slice for him, and he says thank you again. "You're welcome… Jack, I really think you should tell you dad. It sounds like somebody might have taken your pencil case on purpose. And even if he can't find out who did, he can get you some new pencils for school." 
"I told mom but she hasn't done anything yet." 
Your stomach hurts. 
"Well," you murmur, picking up the green pen, "I'm sure she's trying her best, baby. Can I help colour in these trees?" 
You and Jack fall into a companionable silence, his head bobbing to You Make My Dreams (Come True) the cutest thing you've ever seen. You're not sure how long you sit there, but all good things must come to an end, and your half hour for lunch draws to a close. 
"Hey, Jack?" you say, straightening where you kneel and preparing to stand. "I have some stuff I have to do but you're welcome to stay there." 
Unfortunately, you don't manage to grab his attention. Double unfortunately, somebody else does. 
"Morgan, where's Jack?" 
You peek past your desk chair. A little ways away, Hotch stands looking sick to his stomach, and Agent Morgan looks lost. 
"I didn't have him?" 
"I asked him to sit with you," Hotch says miserably, throwing his gaze over the office. "Jack?" 
Jack hears that loud and clear. Something in his dad's tone must spark some urgency, as he stands in a rush and trips on his own shoelace, smacking the top of his head into your nose. 
You gasp. 
"Ouch," Jack moans. 
Blinking, you shake off your disorientation. "Oh no, are you okay? Here, sweetheart, stand up," you encourage gently, "I'm so sorry, have I hurt your head?" 
Jack's gaze to the floor, he rubs the top of his head with a clumsy hand. "It's okay, Miss Agent, it wasn't you and-" He stares at you. 
"What?" you ask. 
"Dad!" he shouts, backing away from you. "Daddy!" 
Jack runs out of your little alcove and straight into his father's legs, almost bowling him over. Hotch drops two relieved hands down to his small shoulders. "What?" he asks, startled, "What happened?" 
Your nose stings, admittedly, but you've felt worse. It's a light throbbing that distracts you entirely from the blood racing down your lips until you taste it. 
Shit, you think, crawling out from under the desk with one hand, the other clamped over your bleeding nose. Your movement draws Hotch's attention, which in turn gathers at least a quarter of the office's. 
"I didn't mean to," Jack says shrilly. 
"It's okay. It wasn't your fault," you say stuffily, clambering onto shaky legs. 
You turn your head away from the collective gaze of the office and start toward the kitchen and hear at least three different people say, "Wait!" 
You ignore them, using your elbow to help tear off a paper towel from the roll and pushing it without finesse against your face. You squirm under the weight of tens of eyes, more embarrassed than anything else, worse when a warm hand turns you by the shoulder. 
"He really didn't mean to," you say, looking up into Hotch's concerned face. 
"I know." 
"Is he okay?”
"He's not the one with a nosebleed," Hotch says, neither kind nor unkind. 
"I honestly didn't even feel it." 
His fingers curl around your wrist, a slow tightening. "That doesn't surprise me, Y/N." 
You bite your tongue to stop from laughing. “He bumped his head into me." 
"Mm. Just a red mark. It won't even bruise." 
You deflate in relief. "Oh, good." 
Hotch's hands have found their way onto yours. He pulls one from your nose, gaze hardening at the strong river of blood that makes its way into the dip of your cupid's bow. 
"I'm sorry, sir." 
He shakes his head and gathers another wad of tissue paper, a light blue that quickly turns to a wine dark when he presses it to your face. Your heart hammers at his proximity, a thousand and one nerves aflame. 
He's close but not too close, nothing anyone could mistake for something else, and still it feels like a strangely intimate moment. His careful touches. He directs your hand to hold a fresh paper towel to the stream of blood and discards the bloody tissue. You watch him push up his sleeves carefully and give his hands a quick rinse in the sink before he dampens another paper towel. 
It's cool against your neck. 
"I think your shirt is ruined," he says, dabbing at a line of dried blood. 
You shiver at the feeling of cold water dripping under your starched collar.
"Does it hurt?" he asks, moving up to your jaw. 
You don't know how to admit it to him. No, it doesn't hurt. Your hands are really warm, and you're touching me so gently I can barely feel it. 
"A little." 
"Well, Jack is very sorry." 
"He doesn't have to be. He tripped, he…" You fade off as Hotch lays his hand across your cheek, thumb lifting your head slightly so he can clean your chin. 
"How are you faring?" he asks. 
You pull your tissue away and wait for the tell-tale heat of continued blood flow. You're ashamed to admit it but you're almost glad it hasn't stopped, Hotch's hand warm and large and impossibly comforting. Nosebleeds don't stress you out, exactly, but it's not fun to be covered in your own blood at work where everyone can see you. It's nice to have somebody wiping it away. 
"I think I'll live," you say. 
Jack sends you an apology card. 
It's hand delivered. Hotch is coming up to the BAU main floor as you're heading out. Like a rock dividing a river, his teammates stream from the elevator around you and Hotch remains inside. 
"I'll catch up," he promises. 
Agent JJ raises her eyebrows. Agent Morgan chuckles. 
You draw in on yourself self-consciously. You don't dress as nicely when he isn't here, and today you're rivalling Dr. Reid for most lovable dork in a pair of brown pants and a big sweater. Teetering the line between professional and unprofessional. 
"Sir," you greet, stepping into the elevator.
He presses the ground floor button. "I have something for you." 
Your eyebrows jump up high. Hotch unzips the main zipper of his duffle back and threads between clothes and papers for a smaller envelope. 
"It's for you." 
You accept, careful not to tear the thin sheet of folded paper as you pull it free. You're thrilled to see a drawing of Charlie Brown on the front, crudely drawn but clearly him with his head-wrapped in bandages. His puppy Snoopy sits beside him with something in his hands. You're not sure what. 
The inside is even sweeter. 
To Y/N
I am sorry if I made your nose angwished. Please feel better soon 
Love, Jack Hotchner. 
"Oh, I love it," you say, rubbing your thumb over a heart drawn in red crayon. "He's really something else, Hotch. He's brilliant, and so smart. I mean, anguished." 
He laughs and it twists your chest in five different directions. "He is." 
"It wasn't his fault though. If my nose weren't so sensitive it really wouldn't have bled at all, I didn't bruise. How is he? Did his head feel better?" 
The doors open. You hesitate, waiting for his reply. 
"Children are made of harder stuff than we are," he says. 
You step backwards out of the elevator. "I felt so bad. I don't suppose he'll want to come and sit with me again." 
"Actually," Hotch says, stepping out of the elevator just as the doors close again, "he thinks you're, uh, in his own words, the 'coolest friend' I've ever had." 
"Friend," you repeat with a smile. 
You've focused on the wrong word, and you worry an awkward silence will ensue, but Hotch steps up to the plate and says, "Yeah. He wouldn't stop telling me about all the cool songs you have on your ipod." 
"Purely for non-working hours." 
"Right." His smile says that he's seen straight through you. 
You're thinking maybe he likes what he sees. 
"This is really amazing," you reaffirm, pressing Jack's card to your chest. 
"He felt guilty." 
"He doesn't have to. Please, tell him I said thank you. And that he's amazing. And that my nose was being dramatic." You smile softly. "He can sit with me whenever he likes." 
"Maybe at the desk, next time, rather than under it."
"Yes, sir." 
You nod at him and he nods back, and you take it as a dismissal, turning on your heel. You've barely walked a metre when he's speaking up.
"Y/N?" 
You look at him from over your shoulder. "Yeah?"
"Are you hungry?" 
You bite your cheek in a hurry to answer, “Yeah. I’m starving.”
Your heart is basically a ticking time bomb in your chest as you and Hotch make your way into the heart of the city. He's a fast walker with long legs and you rush to keep up. That’s totally why you’re breathless. Not because he makes you nervous. 
Hotch is a really surprising guy, though maybe he isn’t surprising at all, you’re simply unversed in how he is outside of work. He talks more and his voice grows louder the further into the city you go, more expressive. 
You’re no profiler, but you’d bet money on Aaron Hotchner being nervous.
Good thing you’re nervous, too. 
“It’s not far now. You like Thai?” he asks. 
“Yeah, of course. Have you ever had Tom Yum?”
“With shrimp?” 
“Exactly.”
“I think I’ve tried it. I lived off of pad Thai when I was a prosecutor,” he says, head tilting back very slightly. His Adam’s apple works under the skin. 
He looks back down, a sheepishness to his voice as he continues, “A lot of late nights.”
“More than now?” you ask skeptically.
His laugh is low and warm. “No. The firm was much closer to the city than the bureau. It’s a long walk.”
“It is,” you say, taking a small step closer to his side to share a secret smile, “but it hasn’t felt that way tonight.”
You try to keep it light. You don’t want to scare him off. 
“No,” he agrees. “It hasn’t.”
You duck into a fragrant Thai restaurant and order fast, the two of you knee to knee in the very corner. A potted plant threatens to blind him every time he moves, and so he endeavours to stay very still. 
The food's a little on the spicy side, and while you're laughing you can't find it in you to feel embarrassed about your runny nose. 
"You didn't like Seinfeld?" you ask, and how you got here's a mystery, but Hotch is extremely passionate about it in the best way. 
"No, of course not. How could you? George was always worrying about something, he was the definition of a self-fulfilling prophecy and he never learned!" he debates, all in a rush, chopsticks moving in emphasis. 
You snort and wipe your nose again. "It was like a relief, though, that it was happening to him and not to you, you know? You might be having a bad day but George Costanza's having a worse one." 
"Oh, honey," he says. 
It takes you a second to realise that he's talking to you. 
"What?" you ask, perplexed. 
Hotch stands up though there's no space for it, chopsticks ditched and hand pushed into the recesses of his pocket swiftly. He pulls out a small packet of tissues, and he lifts his chin, a jut. You lift your own, and he's quick to press the tissue to your nose. 
"It's bleeding?" you ask, startled. 
"Just a little." 
"Sorry." 
"No, no," he says, bent down, a comforting hand around your shoulder, "don't be. It gives me an excuse." 
"To do what?" 
"To be this close." 
Your smile is a slow, molasses thick thing. You can't get a handle on it, and Hotch's answering one is worse. He looks so happy to be here with you, to be wiping your bloody nose. 
It's only a small nose bleed. Hotch pulls the tissue away once or twice to check, wiping at it tenderly and giving you a comforting squeeze each time. The silence feels natural as breathing. 
"There," he says eventually, pulling the bloodied tissue away with a smile. "All done." 
"Thank you, Hotch." 
"I'd think you'd better start calling me Aaron, considering."
"Considering what?"
His hand climbs from your shoulder to the column of your throat. He doesn't make you wait any longer, leaning down with a sure, brave deliberateness. He presses his lips to yours. 
A sweet kiss but too short — barely two seconds and he's taking a half-step away, your lips tingling in want. 
You go to stand and he pushes you down into your seat, not unkindly. "I'm gonna go see if I can get some hot water for you," he says, placating your gutted look with a kiss to your cheek. 
He wipes it thoughtlessly with the pad of his thumb before he goes. 
You're genuinely surprised your nose doesn't start bleeding again at the look he gives you as he turns the corner toward the restaurant's kitchen. Protective, knowing. Your heart races in your chest. 
You probe at your face, elated. Your sensitive nose is good for something after all. 
The first time you sleepover with Aaron is an accident. You don't "mess around," as you'd crooned over the phone, joking but with enough salaciousness to make him smile. The gas and hot water had stopped working in your apartment, and though the landlord had promised they'd fix it the very next morning, Aaron couldn't stand to think about you cold and alone when you could easily be warm and with him. 
So here you are. 
"Are you sure this is okay?" you whisper, peering over his shoulder at Jack. 
His son stands in the living room in his pyjamas.  
"It's okay," he says, "I asked him, and you know he's obsessed with you. His one condition is that you watch FernGully." 
"FernGully," you say, enthused. 
"You'll like it." 
You actually really do. Showered and dressed in your own pyjamas, a little shy but not too much to stop from laying against his side on the sofa. He's got one arm around you and one around Jack but he might as well be invisible, the two of you talking in murmurs across his chest. 
"And that's-" 
"Pips," Jack supplies helpfully. 
"Pips," you say, hand spread over Aaron's chest. 
If he didn't know better he'd think this was a slice of heaven. 
"So many people," you whisper in Aaron's ear. 
"More in the second one." 
"There's two?" 
After the movies finished — "It was better than you said, Jack," — and dinner’s been eaten and cleared away, Aaron takes Jack to bed. 
"Do you want a story?" Aaron asks, flitting around the room in a half-hearted attempt to square away the mess. 
"No." 
"You sure?" 
Jack's eyes are heavy, and they have been since dinner. "Yes," he mumbles, face turned into his pillow, hands lax on top of his blanket. 
Aaron smiles and makes his way to Jack's side. He kisses his son's cheek, and strokes the soft hair from his face. He smells like strawberry toothpaste and kids shampoo. 
You're sitting on the end of the bed when he gets to you, face damp with skincare and shining in the light. Aaron kisses you without touching it, worried he'll mess it up. 
“He’s wiped. All the excitement,” he says. 
“Excitement- From me?” you ask. 
“From you.” He puts his hands carefully either side of your neck.
You haven’t been dating very long, and still he knows how easy it is to fluster you. And while he loves to see it, see you giddy and shy, blinking at nothing like there’s a light shining in your eyes. He’d once pressed his thumb with the very faintest of pressure into your windpipe while kissing you, and you hadn’t been able to look him in the eye for three days. 
He loves that, but he’d prefer if you slept facing him. He wants to see what you look like asleep, as odd as it sounds, he assumes you’ll be beautiful. He wouldn’t be surprised if you were more. 
“Aaron,” you whisper. 
“What?”
“Want me to massage your bad shoulder?”
He wonders, as he thinks is more than allowed, if that’s a seduction trick, but you genuinely just give him a massage, as you have a couple of times in his office after noticing how sore it gets now the weather’s cold. 
You rub into the problem spot carefully, sighing with sympathy. “Oh, baby,” you say, more to yourself than him. 
He fucking loves the way you say it. Aaron’s never been called baby like that — like it’s his name, and it’s sweet to say. Your tired yawns warm the back of his neck as you go. He doesn’t think he’s getting lucky tonight, and he doesn’t care one bit. He feels pretty lucky just having you near. 
He gets you under the covers before you can fall asleep against his back and makes sure you know how grateful he is for the massage with two kisses. The first is a genuine thank you and the second is to make you laugh, nipping and playful under your jaw. 
Aaron falls asleep thinking about it. 
He wakes to something much less idyllic. 
It’s that strange feeling. Being a dad has honed it, but he’s always had it. It’s one of the things that makes him so good at his job, a prickling at the back of his neck. At first he can’t pin it down. 
Your waist rises under his hand with your breathing. He remembers that you’re there and smiles contentedly, hand sliding behind your back to pull you in. You’d fallen asleep on your back, and you’ve turned toward him in your sleep. 
The metallic stick of blood is sudden and sharp in his nose. He knows what it is before he opens his eyes. The room is dark, lit only by the red light of his alarm clock on the nightstand. His eyes ache with fatigue, and he knows in his gut that it’s too early to get up. 
Blood pools under your nose. Not a lot, nothing to panic over, but blood all the same. He sits up, quickly turns on his bedside lamp, and rouses you as gently as he can, a hand slid under your shoulders to drag you up. 
You blink blearily. “What?” you ask, voice scratchy. 
“Nosebleed,” he informs, pinching your nose before blood can slink down your neck and ruin your pyjama shirt. 
You wince and he hates the way you flinch away from his touch, your clouded confusion. It’s only a second but it doesn’t sit right with him. 
“Sorry, honey.”
You catch hold of his bicep and blink some more. 
“You okay to pinch it yourself? I’ll go grab some tissue paper.”
You nod robotically and replace his light pinching with your own, much less kind. He rushes to grab a roll of toilet paper from the bathroom, and when he returns you've pulled yourself into an alert sitting position, awaiting his return. 
He tears you off a wad of paper. “Here, honey.”
“I think it’s stopped.”
“Yeah? Let me grab you a towel.”
Back to the bathroom. When he returns for the second time you’re holding his given toilet paper against your face. He’s alarmed to find your eyes glassy with tears, shimmering in the bedroom light. 
“What’s wrong?” he asks softly, sitting across from you. 
He’d been right about sleepy you. You look lovely, a little funny with your rumpled pyjamas, and now quite sad because of your tears. “Honey,” he says again, pulling your hand from your face so he can assess the damage, “you’re okay. Is it hurting?”
You’ve told him before the nosebleeds are painless, but maybe they’re a symptom of something, maybe you’re sick—
“I ruined your pillow,” you mutter. 
Ah. That’s much better than your being sick. He can work with that easily. 
“You didn’t ruin anything.”
He takes your chin between his thumb and his forefinger to lift your head. The blood has stopped already; your nosebleeds are often a whirlwind, over by the time you’ve started panicking. 
“I’m sorry.”
He drops your bloodied tissue into his lap and brings the dampened towel to your face. He’s cautious. Your nose gets irritated and any roughness could disrupt the blood clot or agitate the anterior blood vessels inside. 
“You think I’m mad over a pillow?”
“No, of course not.” 
You sound stuffy. It’s adorable. Adorable and sad. He rubs the hill of your chin in a show of affection. 
“Then why?”
“Sorry, I think I’m just tired. I- I was trying to make tonight perfect because,” — a small tear bumps down your cheek — “it’s our first night together even if it was accidental.”
He dabs at your upper lip and the wet blood there with a smile growing. “It was perfect. It is perfect. You getting a nosebleed on a seven dollar pillow doesn’t change that.” His hand moves to your cheek, squashing your baby tear. “You know I love any opportunity to touch you… Now, do you want a glass of water?”
You close your eyes and lean your face heavily into his palm. “Can I have one of those kisses from earlier?”
“Can you keep your blood inside your body?” he asks with a smile, rubbing your cheek with his thumb.
“Depends how hard you bite me.”
He’s very, very gentle.
+1
Aaron breaks his nose. You are not supposed to know that he breaks his nose, only he breaks it so bad that he has to go to the hospital to get it set, and he decides he’d like you there. 
Technically, somebody else broke his nose. The details aren’t important. What matters is that Aaron makes a rookie mistake and he has to deal with the consequences, which is a biting, aching pain behind his eyes and a trip to the ER. He does not let them take him in an ambulance, and it really isn’t urgent. He sits in a waiting room chair with a stiff back and it doesn’t take long before you’re striding inside looking terrified. 
“Hey, baby,” he says, testing it out. He doesn’t really like it. 
“What did they give you?” you ask, bending at the waist to take his face into your kind hands. 
“Vicodin when I got here.”
“Lucky you.” You turn his face in your hands. 
“You look beautiful,” he says. 
“I wish I could say the same, but somebody messed you up bad.”
He laughs and takes your face into his hands, the two of you smiling way too much for the situation that you’re in. “I was so worried,” you say with a little laugh. 
He kisses you soundly. It hurts, but it’s worth it. 
They call his name not long after and a nurse takes you both into a grey examination room. The doctor is a short, stern woman who has to use a stool to reach Aaron’s face, and she sets his nose with a swiftness that even he manages to recognise for the brutality that it is in his drug haze. 
You hold his hand. He has to try very hard not to crush your fingers. 
It starts bleeding immediately. 
Aaron meets your gaze over the doctor's head, eyes wide and in similar fashion as your own, and he knows it’s an adverse reaction to shocking pain but he starts giggling. Aaron Hotchner doesn’t giggle, really. He laughs, and sometimes when he’s with Jack that laugh can get super loose and high, but this is a bona fide giggle. 
You try to gasp in shock but you’re laughing too. “Aaron,” you reproach.
He holds his breath as the doctor presses gauze to his face. 
“I can’t believe this is happening,” he says.
You snicker behind your hand. The doctor presses gauze to his face and rolls her eyes. She likely does not get paid enough. 
“You’re still handsome,” you say giddily. 
“Oh, well that's good.”
There’s a small silence rife with tension, and when it breaks it bursts like a dam. You laugh so hard you end up clinging to his arm, chest pressed to his bicep. He strokes the back of your head with a wobbly hand, wondering how miserable he’d be if you weren’t here with him right now. 
“What happened to keeping all your blood inside your body, Hotchner?” you ask, delighted. 
He beams at you dopily. “I’ve never been any good at that.”
You kiss his forehead. The doctor is furious. 
༺༻
7K notes · View notes
matrixbearer2024 · 3 months
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After reading the "Club Catastrophe" could I please request a Vox POV after the Club rink and it's just him going home and letting all of his questionable feelings for Reader out of his systems(See what I did there?)
A Heart's Conundrum
Vox x CollegeStudent!Reader
A/N: I love writing introspective chapters like this in Vox's POV, lets me mess around with his brain and just have him actually face the music that this is in fact something entirely different. What he has with our dear Reader is actually special, and that he's fucking terrified by it. Usually I've seen Vox often "tending to himself" in other fics when he's obsessed over someone but I notice it's usually because he's got a facination and interest but not something quite complicated like this. Bro doesn't feel lust here despite the closeness and he's very VERY confused. I wasn't initially going to write something like this to keep things pretty goofy but it actually slots into the narrative pretty well to have the resident TV man take another gander at attempting to understand his emotions after the emotional whiplash he'd gone through in "Reunited Again Aren't We?". Bonus points that we kind of get a jealous Valentino confrontation HAHAHAHA-
A/N: This chapter kind of mentions Vark being a good boy and taking care of his emotionally constipated owner lol, I love myself a good doggo. I plan on reader meeting the funny little dude in a later interlude but for now it's just going to be mostly Vox. Anyway, I'm so glad you guys are enjoying this series- I just wanted to say thank you to those sending me love through my inbox too! I read all the things you guys say so it makes me really happy to see my work so well recieved. As always, I hope you guys enjoy this interlude and happy reading!
When Vox had warned you back then to be careful at a party and not to drink too much-
He only said it out of courtesy in good faith that you knew how to hold your liquor.
Disclaimer, you didn't.
Another thing he didn't expect was just how easy it was for you to get drunk.
It was like your tolerance was nonexistent.
The two of you had just been hanging around by the bar and ordering drinks when he noticed you were starting to sway slightly in your seat.
That made the overlord glance over to see you'd just gone through two margaritas and you were holding a third.
Vox had been drinking a lot slower than you have, adopting a leisurely pace and just trying out the different cocktails that the bar had to offer.
Though seeing what you were doing made him wonder if you were still kind of new to casual drinking.
Rolling his eyes, the overlord finished up his martini and plucked the half-finished margarita from your hands.
"Okay doll, maybe that's enough for you."
"Whaaaaaa? Whyyyy??"
"Because you're drunk dollface, so I won't let you have any more."
"Awwwwwhhhhh... can't I at least finishhh itttt??"
Your words were slurred and your breath absolutely reeked of alcohol, your movements clumsy as you tried to grab your beverage back.
When you ungraciously slumped against his chest in a giggling mess while trying, Vox was fairly certain you were hammered out of your mind at this point.
That took a lot less than he originally thought it would.
Placing down your glass at the bar, he let you stay leaning on him while he shrugged his blazer off and wrapped it around you instead.
Your fluffy ears just wiggled around slightly when he'd done that, making Vox raise an eyebrow at you.
Especially when your arms clumsily circled his waist in a hug and kept him there.
"Mhmmmm... warmmmmm..."
Pfft, you were really out of it this time.
He couldn't help the smile on his face at your antics, but as cute as it was-
It would be really irresponsible to still keep you here in the club.
When he noticed Vaggie was nearby, the overlord waved her down to get her attention.
He didn't know if the mild surprise from her was because of how clingy you were or because he wasn't really reacting to it.
"Woah, what happened to (Y/N)?"
"Drank a bit too much too fast. I'm gonna take (Y/N) back to the hotel so they can rest."
"Sure, we'll meet you there. We'll only be staying a little while longer anyway."
"Whaaaaaaa?? Nooooooo- I don't wanna gooooooo-"
"Nope, you need rest. Let's go."
Vox just sighed when you made a small fuss about leaving and being carried.
You were cute, but your drunken stubbornness was not.
Especially with how difficult you made it for the overlord to properly carry you.
In every other way he tried to grab hold, you squirmed out of his grip and it almost made him drop you multiple times.
He panicked a few times when he almost did but it just made him feel more tired when he saw you were fine-
He did eventually find a compromise though, since it seemed you didn't have too many issues being carried on piggyback.
Your head rested on his shoulder by the time he walked you both out of the club, arms wrapped around his neck while he held up your legs.
"Vooooxxyyyyyyy~ Where are we gooiiinnnnnn~?"
"Back to the hotel, you're wasted dollface."
"Aawwwwhhh? I wanted to keep partying witchuuuuuuu-"
"There's always a next time doll, just don't drink too much again."
You giggled at his response and Vox couldn't help but smile.
Your ramblings were entertaining, and it gave him some food for thought while walking back to the hotel.
He just hummed and agreed with some of the things you would say, even if it was nonsensical or not to show he was still listening.
Of course, that was until you said something that nearly made Vox trip on his own feet.
"Mhhhmmmm- you're really cute ya knowww~? I like that yooouuu alwaayyshhh take care of meh-"
"I'm not cute, but thank you."
He tried to brush off the comment, struggling to reign in his own emotions in lest he accidentally overheat and burn you.
He already had trouble just getting over your antics, the last thing he needed was to accidentally bluescreen and drop you because you drunkenly said something cute.
Well, that was until his processing froze anyway when you nuzzled your head into the back of his neck and mumbled something he couldn't quite catch.
His heart jumped into his throat and he had to stop walking for a moment, willing himself to calm down.
Static charge began to wind up in the air around him, and he took a moment to focus and dissipate it before moving again.
He almost zapped you, and it would'be been completely your fault-
You were making it really difficult to just- exist at the moment.
Not that Vox was complaining, he just didn't really know what to do with himself at the moment.
He wondered slightly if you'd even remember any of this come tomorrow, but that wasn't really his problem.
He used his powers to open the hotel doors before stepping in, immediately making his way towards your room.
Vox already knew where it was, especially since he'd walk you there whenever he visited before leaving to return to Vee tower.
He let out a tired sigh before gently placing you down on the bed mattress, just leaving his coat wrapped around you while he tucked you in.
Considering that you were already out like a light, the overlord could only guess that you'd fallen asleep just a little earlier while he was still walking.
Not that he'd have been able to notice when he was too busy trying to keep his abilities from going sideways because of you.
Vox looked back to your resting form and couldn't help but fondly smile, slowly moving to your side and brushing away a stray hair that fell over your face.
Your expression reminded him of the one night he'd been at your side after that horrible situation with your ex back when you were alive.
You just looked so peaceful, not plagued by any worry or fear of anything else.
That made him just that little bit more relaxed compared to earlier.
Before he knew it, he placed a soft kiss to your temple while you slept.
"Rest well my dear."
Vox stays there for a while to make sure you're actually asleep before getting up and walking out.
His limbs feel heavier than earlier, to the point he actually needs to make a conscious effort to leave you.
By the time he's walking out of the hotel, he feels weird.
Like he's just extremely tired, but... pleased?
Once he gathers his bearings again, he travels through some wires to get back to the Vee tower.
However, he's a bit absentminded when he walks through the doors.
"Hold up, where's your blazer?"
Vox doesn't even look at Velvette when he replies, his posture slightly slumped to reflect his exhaustion.
Compared to his typical work day, this wasn't really much.
So he wasn't entirely sure why he felt so out of it already.
"(Y/N) borrowed it, I'll just get it tomorrow."
He mumbled, walking past the youngest Vee towards the elevator.
The overlord's only goal right now was to get to his room and just rest.
By the time Vox shuts the door behind him, he leans back against the cold metal with a sigh.
His back sliding down until the overlord finds himself sitting on the floor with his screen in his hands.
Today was... something.
From how eager you were to teach him how to skate-
Then the anger he felt from that other sinner trying to make a move on you-
To becoming one adorably messy drunk.
Not to mention the kiss you'd given him-
His fans whirred louder when he raised a clawed hand to where you'd pecked his cheek.
You nearly crashed his systems with that one.
Only when he hears a yip and some cooing does he snap out of it and look up.
Ah.
"Hey Vark..."
The hammerhead moved closer to him and whined slightly, prompting Vox to start petting him in comfort.
The little guy always seemed to know if there was just something up with his owner.
Today was no different.
"I'm okay, just tired. Today was... weird."
The shark kind of just sat there, accepting pets while the overlord talked to him about his day.
The ups and downs-
Even some of the random things you mentioned-
He recounted everything, talking to the hammerhead about it to get it off his chest.
It didn't matter if Vark couldn't say anything in response, the little guy was just listening attentively to his owner regardless.
And as silly as it was- Vox just had to let all of his thoughts out.
It wasn't like there was anyone else he could talk to about this stuff either.
"And it's so odd... I almost didn't want to leave the hotel earlier when I dropped her off."
The shark just made a displeased noise.
"Oh come on, you know I wouldn't leave you by yourself here. Hm, it's almost time for your dinner."
While preparing Vark's food, the overlord finds his mind wandering back to you again.
Especially that time you had to watch over your friend's puppy.
He didn't really understand why he did the things he did back then either.
Placing the pet bowl down in front of the hammerhead, Vox wanders outside to the common room and plops himself down on the couch to surf his phone.
He had nothing better to do, and as tired as he was-
He didn't feel like sleeping quite yet.
When the couch dips beside him, Vox looks up from the small gadget only to see Velvette gazing at him inquisitively.
"Gotta say, this is probably the most chill I've ever seen you."
The overlord scoffs and rolls his eyes, was he really that subdued today?
"I drank quite a bit earlier at the club so I'm still feeling the buzz from the alcohol."
That was a lie, he didn't really drink much compared to his usual.
It just seemed like the most sound excuse he had that didn't involve you.
Still, Velvette just rolled her eyes at his deflective response.
"Right. Anyway, how was it?"
"How was what?"
"Your thing with (Y/N)?"
"Why not just ask her yourself?"
"She's not responding and I've got to know the details old man."
Vox just looked at his colleague for a moment, debating on shrugging off her question.
Hm...
Well, he was feeling nice.
He could indulge her a little.
"We just met together at the club to catch up. We talked, we sang, we danced, and then I saw (Y/N) off at the hotel before coming back here."
"Wow, that has got to be the most boring date ever."
The overlord just shrugged nonchalantly, he left out a vital piece of information on purpose but it was mostly because he didn't know what to do with it.
Yeah... he still wasn't sure how to make heads or tails of that kiss.
And it wasn't even a proper kiss either.
But suddenly, the loud slam of a door from behind them made the other two Vees quickly look to see who caused it.
And in strolled a clearly irritated pimp overlord.
"A date? You're kidding me Voxy, you actually went on a date?"
"I wouldn't necessarily call it that, but I did go out today. Why?"
"Don't fuck with me right now Vox, did you or did you not go on a date?"
Despite the buzz of the alcohol in his systems keeping him more pacified than usual, Vox narrowed his eyes at Valentino annoyed.
"Why do you want to know?"
"Because it's unlike you to just go on a date without needing something from someone. Like a deal or to conduct business, and I checked in with your secretary amorcito, you didn't have anything scheduled for today."
Velvette just stared between her two colleagues.
She wasn't about to get involved in this drama.
After all, it was Vox's fault if he couldn't properly handle his relationships.
Even if a small part of her did grow concerned about how (Y/N) factored into this.
"I just went out to a club, drank a little and came back. What's that to you?"
"Oh Voxy~ If you wanted to go clubbing why didn't you invite me~?"
Valentino moved closer to the couch, adopting a flirty tone and sensually grabbing Vox's arm.
To which the technology overlord just shrugged off his advances.
It felt wrong.
Just, all sorts and levels of wrong.
Predictably, the moth wasn't pleased with that reaction.
All the more when he had caught a wiff of something new.
That perfume didn't belong to any of them-
So who's was it?!
"You fucking liar! Who the fuck were you with at the club Vox?!"
"I wasn't with anybody, I just went to go drink and unwind. It's been a long week."
"Oh please, as if that's the case. Which new plaything did you find? Don't tell me you actually have feelings for some random tramp you found off the streets?!"
Vox didn't really know how to react to those words.
On one hand, he was absolutely livid that Valentino thought you were just some 'random tramp'.
But on the other hand, that just brought his feelings back into question again.
You were both friends-
And that was it.
Right?
Still the overlord couldn't help but question if that really was just the case.
"Fuck off Val."
"You wouldn't go around dating with just anybody, what the hell were you doing and with who?"
"I'm going to sleep."
At this point, Vox was just done with the conversation.
He didn't want to keep dancing around the obvious question and it just made him feel more tired.
Rising from the couch, he attempted to walk past Valentino and just head back to his room.
Well, that was before the pimp roughly grabbed his arm and prevented him from leaving.
"Who the fuck was it Vox? I swear to god I'm going to turn the entire ring upside down and find that bitch if it's the last thing I-"
The moth didn't even have time to finish his sentence before he got a heavy punch to the face.
Staggering back, Valentino looked at his colleague with wide eyes when he realized what had happened.
All the more surprising was just how royally pissed his colleague looked.
Vox's screen glitched as sparks and small jolts of electricity jumped across his body, his left eye swirling with rings as he just finally put his arms down and just glared at Valentino.
"If you so much as harm a single hair on their head I will personally kill you myself."
His voice was distorted by some static overlay, the white noise only fizzling away when Vox had managed to compose himself properly.
Velvette merely glanced between the two worried this altercation might end up devolving into something worse.
Thankfully, it didn't.
Valentino just grit his teeth and glared at the technology overlord, watching as he held his arms behind his back and briskly walked away.
That punch fucking hurt!
By the time Vox had returned back to his own bedroom, he sighed as his colleague's words just echoed in his mind.
He didn't have feelings for you-
You were both just very close good friends.
But when he passed a nearby mirror, he almost didn't recognize himself.
This wasn't the smiling telecaster overlord that had total control over hell's biggest technological empire.
This was just... him.
Tired and disheveled in a light blue turtleneck practically falling to pieces because he couldn't understand what was going on.
And this was considering that Vox was already a pretty self aware person from an emotional standpoint.
After all, he had to make sure not to have freak outs too bad or it could cause the entire pentagram city to lose power.
So why...
Why was he such a train wreck whenever it came to you???
Inadvertently, he'd changed over time because of your influence.
How he felt towards Valentino being more than proof of that.
And again, his chest bloomed with a warm fuzzy sensation he couldn't properly comprehend at the thought of you.
Sizzling his wires and just feeding his systems with an electrifying feeling that Vox just couldn't begin wrap his head around.
Again, it was because of you.
He stared at the mirror for a good minute before catching himself with a tinged pink screen.
Wait a minute-
He's seen this kind of situation play out before.
After all, he's aired enough shitty and cliche romance dramas to know.
There was just no fucking way.
He couldn't be foolishly head over heels in love with you.
And still, as he continued to look-
The more things in the past started to click into place.
His emotions and reactions around you just started to make more and more sense when love was inserted into the context of the situation.
The reality crashed into Vox like a freight train and he just stared at his reflection in disbelief.
"You have got to be kidding me..."
He was completely fucked.
A/N: Now if y'all are expecting Reader to start dating Vox after his oh so overdue realization- they're not. Cuz our dear (Y/N) is hilariously dense and Vox just does not wanna make a move when he's still trying to understand when and how the heck this happened without him noticing lmao so still more suffering and shenanigans that are going to make us and the Hazbin cast absolutely appalled at how a pair of people can be so blind to a truth slamming into their faces-
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gangplanksorenji · 4 months
Text
Kinknuary Day 8: Thighfucking
Pairing: Kep1er Mashiro x Male Reader
Word Count: 4,586
[Kinknuary Masterlist]
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Love can be faux and genuine, as well as how greedy and fluttering romance can be—well, that’s what you believe and no one can brush it off your mind. Maybe, at least, not from her attempts of persuasion that she made you this way but, it’s the way you view things—so contradictory but hell, you can’t be blamed for believing this, probably an earlier heartbreak could be the cause.
“It’s not that easy, Shiro—you should’ve known the story better—”
“Well, I’m just giving you some advice and my thoughts about the situation—no harsh feelings, I swear!”
“Yeah, you do…” You closed your eyes as the bitterness of the alcohol was getting through you, feeling that burning sensation was too strong, strong enough to maybe forget what happened but it’s just making everything painful. Mashiro sends off a glare as she clicks her tongue of dismay, disapproving of your ways of approaching the situation.
“Look, she’s not going to just ditch you for a reason—maybe she’s just genuinely mad or something! Don’t you just want to talk to her and work this out?”
You laughed at her current suggestion as the pain inside you voiced out such hints of depressive emotions, “If it’s that easy, Shiro…”
As you’re about to take that another gulp of alcohol, Mashiro hits your hand with a furious demeanor (you’ll probably call it an adorable expression since she’s pretty much the epitome of it, in anything she do), not really having the fact that you’re trying to get wasted because of such pain in your heart.
“And alcohol’s not always the answer…”
“You don’t get it, Shiro.” You let out a deep sigh as your vexed emotions are starting to have a hit on you. Feeling genuinely concerned for you, Mashiro then looks at your eyes as her glowing orbs are trying to ignite the fire of delight that once invaded your heart.
“That’s why I’m here for you, as always.” Mashiro caresses your cheeks as she tries to comfort and reassure you and with her genuine attempts of making you feel loved, you can’t help but emanate such a faint smile, voicing out your gratefulness for Mashiro, in all times, even at both your lowest points, she always choose to comfort you first rather than herself and with that, you can’t help but think if you’re worth being such a good friend of hers.
She’s too down-to-earth and selfless, something you’d want to yourself but can’t help but path the opposite and that’s why you’re grateful for meeting such a lovely, thoughtful girl like Mashiro.
She’s built like no other and you can’t help but feel butterflies, the best ones, in a while…
“If you want, I can talk to her so the both of you can make this up—”
“No, Shiro—it’s our problem. You don’t really need to interfere—”
“But I want to help!” Mashiro yelled with hurt and anger filled in every emotion as she sheds a tear, feeling really genuine to not let his friend go to another depressive state and wanting your relationship to end just because of sheer stupidity and selfishness. “I d-don’t want you to feel shitty ever again—you mean a lot to me and it breaks me down when you’re down too, so, please…”
You close your eyes as you fight the emotions that've been battling around your body. It’s a quarrel, a conflict of love between the both of you and she shouldn’t be meddling between the both of you but when she’s shedding a tear, on her lowest and willing to truly help you, you can’t say no but you need to and there’s one thing you need to do to stop this melancholy.
An audible murmur can be heard as she was caught off-guard with your lips latching onto hers. In your whole life, right from the start that you knew her until now, you never shared such intimacy and hotness with Mashiro, but that streak ends now as you indulge with the taste of luscious lips and Mashiro further reciprocates with deepening the kiss. You don’t know if this is love or romance but one thing’s for sure, it’s all genuine and that’s what really matters. It didn’t take long before the both of you closed your eyes and let it all be felt coursing to your veins. It was lovely, affectionate and at the same time, wrong. 
There wasn’t anything wrong, maybe just unorthodox in your own words but nonetheless, you both love it and there’s no one holding you back.
There wasn’t any leverage to deepen the kiss if oxygen was lacking within your body, so, after a hot minute of sharing a kiss with Mashiro, you involuntarily pulled away from the warm embrace of it, gasping for air as you faintly smiled at her, feeling butterflies from the kiss.
“Gosh, I’m s-sorry, Shiro—I c-can’t help it—”
“Don’t—” Mashiro’s expression was stern as she didn't want any apologies coming out of your mouth because she seriously meant the reciprocation of the kiss.
“What d-do you mean “Don’t.”?”
She didn’t answer but rather, her lips spoke the actions clearer as such acts are better than words. Further indulging onto the intimate kiss, again, you directed your hands onto the back of waist as the resurgence of need instantly fueled you onto the enamored oblivion of your now so-called definition of ‘love’. It didn’t just stay there, because with tongues battling for dominance as a starting action on this show, you demonstrate such skillful acts of dance towards Mashiro and she took this as hint of stride as she fixes her position and further submit onto such lustful acts of dominance as not so long after, the both of you pulled out again, in need of better respiration. It wasn’t such a detachment that was thoroughly distant against each other because the both of you still peck each other’s lips as the both of you voiced out your frustrations and emotions that you’ve long shackled since day one.
“You c-can’t be this oblivious—hah…”
“And I’m so fucking stupid for not knowing anything genuine, Mashiro—do I even deserve you?”
“Shut up—” Mashiro did it herself as she invaded the caldera of your mouth with another intimate kiss but it didn’t last very long, as she opted for more ways and possible propositions you wanted to do with her. 
Everything happened way too quick but honestly, that was just the tip of the iceberg because you really felt surprised (mostly her since you’re the one who initiated the sudden kiss) and the peculiar feeling of love. You never knew how much she sparked you with her charms and affection because you were too oblivious to know anything besides just seeing her as a friend.
You still love her but Mashiro—it’s goddamn difficult to choose but you can’t be arsed to really think about her when Mashiro’s now clouding your whole mind and with a given conclusion (for now), you averted all of your attention to her only.
Maybe it’s time for another bewildering awakening…
“You kiss me really good…”
“Did I? I w-wasn’t even sure—”
Mashiro shuts you up with her index finger laying down your lips, silencing you for such loathing remarks that she hates to hear. “Say something like that again and I’ll punch you.”
You scoff and laugh a little, her sarcastic attempts at being aggressive is so adorable that you want to kiss her again and show how much you loved it. “Okay, Shiro—I’m sorry, hah. You’re a great kisser too, honestly—I’m sorry, I’m just new to this f-feeling.”
She can hear you tremble because of such nervousness and honestly, she understands you because she’s in the same boat with you—her lips trembling in delight after such intimate kisses shows how much serotonin coursed over her body too that she doesn’t know what to really feel either. Blushing from your earlier compliments, she covered her face as she did so, knowing how she’s feeling a little embarrassed being complimented, especially by you. Even with how wholesome this is going, you can’t help but imagine the lustful fantasies you could with her but it’s only a matter of time until you—
“B-but can I confess something t-to you?” You got all of your ears and eyes on her, giving her the green light with a simple ‘yes’ as she proceeds with her wants.
“I wanted to do something but I don’t know if you want to do it…”
If this is what you think it is, then this is the time, a preferably lucky jackpot that you’ve wanting for so long—
“Go on, Shiro—no matter what can that be, I’m all ears—”
“I—you—I w-want to su—”
“Suck me off?”
Mashiro, stunned with your predictive advancements, gasped almost inaudibly as her mouth hung agape from your vulgar words in which, she didn’t mind because that’s exactly what she’s thinking off and it was a gamble—you didn’t want to end this note as Mashiro becomes uncomfortable with you but that’s not really the case because if people knew how she’s much more open about these sexual desires, then they’ll never look the same way like ever before.
Now, it’s not just going to stay in her imagination, let alone viewing it on such blue, pixelated screens and it’s just about time for everything to be in reality.
“H-how did you know?”
“Maybe you’re too readable—I can sense it, Shiro. I know you well, too.”
Mashiro was a bit caught off-guard with that but nonetheless, she trusts you so, she became open and wanted to try it out and maybe even more.
“But you wanted this, don’t y-you?”
The both of you didn’t mind anything as the spacious rooftop allows so much things to be let out, even with the most sinful profanities you had in mind but that (most of it), will be directed towards discomfort, which is the last thing you’d want. Now, pinning her onto the concrete wall as you swivel and repositioned yourself onto the more dominating spot of the act, you smirked as you set yourself on an answer that’ll rock her world: “More than anything, Shiro—I’ve always wanted to know how it’ll feel inside your possibly tight mouth.”
With such hot and erotic words escaping your mouth and the things happening escalating quicker than what she expected it to be, she can’t help but bite her bottom lip and let out needy whines that further puts salt onto the wound of lust. With how great she felt when kissing you, you can’t possibly brush off the fact that her mouth will possibly feel great on your length too but don’t let this be settled just on your imagination—make it a reality you can possess and cherish.
“Kneel down, Shiro—” You quickly unbuttoned your pants as she helped you with that, her hands doing such a magnificent job at it as all you can just sense is the cold air permeating your skin. As soon as your last restraint was about to be undressed and on your ankles, you knew the show would soon be starting and with one, swift motion, it was all off.
Kneeling down (she didn’t mind the cold concrete of the rooftop as her focus is now fully averted onto your erecting shaft), she traces her fingers from base up to the tip, leaving a tingle of an electric charge that makes you moan in sensitivity and delight. Her eyes traced your shaft, every inch of it as admiration was evident on her glowing orbs and it’s just going to get better than this. 
“T-this was way better and weirder than I expected.”
“Don’t worry, you’ll get used to this, probably…”
And now, she succumbed to her biggest anticipation—your cock, inside her mouth and instantly, she gagged as she took the whole length inside her tight cavern, making her eject out of it and coughed a little.
“Y-you didn’t need to do that, Shiro—don’t take it all, start with slow sucks and eventually gather the p-pace—oh god!”
She knew what would happen and rather, took that first attempt as a foolish remark from you and instantly, she hugged her plump lips around your tip as she bobbed her head with almost a stagnant pace and god, she’s surprisingly good at it. Maybe, don’t judge the book by its cover next time…
She lathers every inch of your throbbing length full of her saliva, not leaving any of it unsheathed with her drool as her tongue does wonders all over your mushroom tip, capable of sending such pleasure that earns the finest of moans from you, in which, made her flustered considering how she’s making you feel good. With such a gradually increasing pace and a wonderful manifestation of her skills, it actually made you love her even more as the sounds of her gags and deprivation makes everything even better. If you were to be fooled, you won’t even think it’s her first time because on how she’s sucks you off with care and intense pleasure—thanks to the suction of her mouth, it made everything completely off the charts and her lack of experience is evident with her serrated teeth coming over the way of scratching the skin but nonetheless she’s doing good (she’s trying her best not to hurt you even though hints of it are evident and unavoidable for now).
“God, how are you like—fuck—a-already doing good like this, Shiro?”
She took seconds to divert her attention away from your succulent shaft as she didn’t want the tempo to die soon but nonetheless, she pulled out of your saliva-filled length and responded, “Toys—I f-felt a little kinky and decided t-to really practiced a little…”
“Hah—no wonder why you’re sometimes acting strange, huh? Feeling exhausted randomly now I know why…”
Mashiro just brushed off your words as her mouth does such great work onto the wholeness of your shaft, despite only playing it safe and taking only half of it—you could just imagine how better she’s going to be if the both of you consider this as a frequent routine every week. In every stroke she does, it brings utmost pleasure to you as well as her talented mouth being the icing of the top of the cake and it’s just a wonderful sight to see. You could see the tears flowing down her cheeks as the constant gags she does was the reason and it just arouses you further—her sullied façade adding up to the arousing sight is such a fulfillment of wonder and sin. Her saliva makes everything a mess, scattered all over the vicinity of your shaft as this is just hot to handle but there’s no intention of stopping because neither party wanted anything to end so early and to be deprived immediately. It wasn’t long until you grab her head for leverage from the pleasure you’ve been experiencing as she grabs your hips for her own leverage onto better service. You’re not going to last long, you could already feel it and thankfully, she pulls out of your length with a pop that make your cock twitch, not to mention how the string of saliva being connected to her lips and onto your mouth makes the scene such epitome of such sexiness and seduction. As she’s about to let her warm lips be in contact with your length again, you stop her as you propose something to her.
“Don’t—I w-want to fuck you now, Shiro. You could taste my load anytime soon but not now.”
Of course, it’s not surprising that she didn’t like the thought that she didn’t get to finish you off all by herself as she also knows how vulnerable your defenses are—on the verge of cumming with nothing left to do but succumb onto it but thankfully, you fought it as you didn’t want this to be over.
“B-but I want to taste you, or make you paint my face—”
“But you’re insatiable, Shiro—I want to fuck you now, from behind.”
She knows how well she turned you on and you know how much she wants this even though she can define such hypocrisy laced between her words. The both of you know how much you need each other but not how much you want each other—and now with no one to stop you, this is everything you’ve been wanting to win and you're not going to lose anything anyway.
“Honestly, I’d want you to fuck me—I won’t turn that down but I’d want it somewhere else, for now.”
Now rising up on her feet, Mashiro wipes her knees as she faces you and whispered seductively, “I want you to fuck my thighs instead, since you’ve been eyeing on them since earlier.”
That is an offer you can’t turn down since her thighs are considerably one of her best features that you’d want to feast upon and worship, when given the time but honestly, you’d love to ram the possibly tight pussy but if that’s what Mashiro wants, then that’s what you need to attend to and fulfill it with no hesitation—you yourself adore the thought of fucking her thighs. Now facing the wall, her hands resting onto it and her back arched, it didn’t take long before you line up your saliva-sheathed cock between those pillowy muscles, submerging them into no-return.
“This could’ve been better on the window, Shiro.”
“Why though? Hah—that feels good…”
With such a sluggish pace, you can’t help but feel an incredible surge of pleasure as the softness of her thighs and the heat emanating between it (thank god she’s wearing a skirt so nothing became a struggle) aiding that long-awaited serotonin. Now hiking that skirt of hers right up to her waist, she yelped as the cold air brushed against her skin that made her more sensitive as your thrusts added up to that profound pleasure she’s experiencing. Even without the stimulation on her clit, she can’t help but feel great as the wetness of her folds are enough evidence as from time to time, you feel her nectar dripping down her thighs and onto your raging length.
Her thighs do wonders all over you and you can’t help but let out the most erotic moans in every oscillation your hips do. 
This is crazy but you’re an unstoppable force now as no one can make you hinder your carnal desires.
“God—you’re dripping already, Shiro? My dick must’ve turned you on so much, hm?”
Mashiro just can’t help but whimper in need between every second that has passed, almost ignoring you yet she’s not that girl that’ll fall deaf on her ears. “Y-you don’t know how long I’ve been waiting for this—even just in my thighs, you already feel good.”
With her encouraging words of lust, you can’t stop yourself from doing what’s been boggling your mind and with her cheeks presented all over your sight, you slapped her butt with a harsh spank as she yelped in response, the sudden surge of pleasure and pain contradicting what she's feeling right now.
“Fuck—why’d you slap me like that?”
“You don’t want it, Shiro? It’s okay, I won’t d—”
“I never said I didn’t like i-it—oh god, do it again, please!”
With your ruthless pace between her thighs are the constant harsh slaps that resonated around your ears, bringing music onto such lustful profanities that has been fueling you since the beginning, you can’t help but just maintain the tempo as there’s no point of stopping as Mashiro doesn’t even bother to even stop you as she herself, is now aiding for your pleasure and to reach your high as soon as possible. With her wiggling and thrusts of her pillowy butt and her thighs further amplifies the pace with such great trajectory, achieving a series of rough thrusts you never thought was possible and you’re loving every second of it.
“Y-yeah, Shiro—we should’ve done this somewhere that has a window—”
“For what?”
With your hands averting its attention towards her toned waist and to fix her hair in order for it to fall onto her left shoulder, you lean in and whisper another set of dirty thoughts that makes her enlightened, “Because I want them to know how much you’ll love this and when I cum, I’ll spray it all on the window and let you kneel down to taste it.”
Now Mashiro, being enlightened with such a kinky thought of yours, hints a bit of regret for not doing this somewhere as her imagination wildens with your lustful words, making her heat drip even more, aiding for more comfort and lubricant on your reckless length.
“Maybe even do i-it on a mirror, so you could also see my face when you thrust on my thighs.”
“Even going to be better if it’s in your pussy but fuck, Shiro—that’s hot and shit—I’m not going to last that long, t-too—shit!”
That is a hot scene probably urging you to even fuel your thighfuck kink but the inevitable will soon come, ending your masterclass and the long-lived pleasure that has been coursing through your veins. She sensed it too as your constant throbbing can be felt between her thighs and to further chase your orgasm, she clamped her thighs even tighter around your rock-hard cock as she moans for you, voicing out your incredible work of sin and to fuel you even more—not to mention her hands constants touching her breasts in order to stimulate herself and earn some pleasure too. With constant spanks, your mouth marking her nape and peppering it with kisses, it wasn’t long until you achieved the desired promised land and within a single blink, you let everything out. 
She wiggle her thighs, massaging your orgasmic sensation as every spurt lets out such angelic moans coming out of your mouth as this is such an experience to behold and cherish. Even though your cum was such a waste considering how you just sprayed the concrete wall instead of maybe letting herself taste your succulent, long-awaited seed but nonetheless, it was an euphoric experience you’ll never forget and with such exhaustion, you pulled out of the valley of her thick, meaty thighs as she turned around, and initiated another kiss as she felt delightful with her needs sustained by you.
“Fuck—I’m sorry ‘bout that, Shiro. I can’t help it and I should’ve let you taste it—”
“No, it’s fine, honestly. I never thought a real cock would feel that good, and it feels kinda weird but good too.”
You laughed as you caressed her hair, emanating a smile that became contagious as you reassured her, “We’ll probably get used to this but for now, I think we need to get out of here…”
Mashiro realizes that the both of you are somewhat, still in a public place as you dressed your bottom-half up and hurriedly fixed yourselves as you prepare to come down and to do such things the both of you had been longing for.
What day to remember, this is… and it’s still not done as the night is still young…
---
“Fuck, baby—go harder on my thighs!”
“Of course, Shiro—fuck, you’re so hot…”
And it was later fulfilled as the both of you became so derived onto the profound lust earlier that you needed to attend to each other’s needs again, and this time, it’s better since everything is just going according to plan.
Just as how the both of you liked it: against the mirror, Mashiro’s back arched as you fuck her thighs recklessly from behind and as the cherry on top, her ahegao face and her expression that further sends your arousal into oblivion. The pace was incredibly and pleasurably fast, executed with such techniques that furthers makes the best for the both of you and not just some any dumb and fast ones—the further alteration of fast strokes and then succumbing onto a sluggish pace is what makes this better.
Mashiro’s cheeks are now filled with your handprints, skin’s a shade of a familiar rosy hue as every spanks delivers such erotic moans right from her mouth. She was now long-lost with your control, fully submitting onto her own animalistic urges as she encourages you onto upping the pace, to further chase another orgasm. She squeezes her thighs oh-so-tightly around your cock, suffocating it and giving you the maximum pleasure you could attain and probably, foreshadowing the possible tightness of her pussy in which, will be attended in no time but for now, you gotta let her know how great your hips are when ensuing such mind-blowing thrusts.
The constant rhythmic contact of your skin orchestrate such genre of music that no one could possibly define, maybe close as an erotic soundtrack but it’s more—it’s a state of bliss; a lustful trance to treasure and succumb into and you’re just onto that trance with no point of turning back.
There wasn't much talking (more of just moans, groans and whines) as actions speak louder than words, the oscillation of your hips manifesting such divine bliss that benefits the both of you and your needs. You could definitely feel how close you are, again and no one can blame you because with these godlike, perfectly-thick thighs and the softness of it can make anyone succumb onto it and shower it with affection because of how perfectly sculpted it is. Gladly, you’re the only one who can utilize this gift and you’re not planning on giving it away—only you.
“F-fuck, Shiro—I’m going to cum, again—fuck!”
“Spray it all over the mirror, baby. Come on, cum for me—blow your thick, creamy load all over my thick thighs and onto the mirror, please—please cum—”
With your harsh grip on her hips and one, last harsh spank, you bury your whole length onto the warm valley of her thighs as you erupt multiple shots of semen onto the mirror, making it splatter all over the reflective object as it drips down eventually. Without even commanding her to kneel down, she does it ahead of what you’re thinking, as she seductively swirl and lick her tongue all over it, collecting every semen sample on the mirror and not wasting anything, not even a single drop. With her half-naked body knelt down, licking the mirror clean like she’s not having enough of a five-star meal and licking her plate for further conclusive delightment and that alone, makes you throb even more. After she’s done, she stood up and then showed her tongue that was filled with cum and will one, single gulp, it was all gone and now onto her stomach.
“Fuck—that tasted good, baby.”
Smiling from her complimentary advances, she’s missing one thing and you’re more likely to address it now, knowing she’ll ultimately fulfill what you’re going to command her.
“Don’t you mind cleaning my cock?”
“Oh yes, absolutely. I’m dying to taste your delicious dick, again.”
She parts her lips onto your tip, and up to the base, licking it clean as no cum remains uncollected with her talented tongue and with just little time, she pulled out of your length, showing you her masterwork—your length is now crystal-clear, shining with her saliva emanated thanks with the dim lights from above. Standing up, you pinned against the wall and whispered into her ear, painting a smirk on your face, “We’re just getting started, Shiro.”
“I know, baby—then make me yours for the night. There’s still plenty of time to do everything we may think of…”
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tomhollandisabae · 2 years
Text
lonely- simon "ghost" riley x f!reader
masterlist
fandom; call of duty
summary; after simon had left for his next mission, you were faced with the biggest challenge of your life and you had to get through that all by yourself.
warnings; angst, pregnancy, fluff, mentions of death, english is not my first language
words; idk 🤷🏻‍♀️
a/n; this idea was stuck into my brain since last week and once i couldn't find anything similar to it anywhere to read, i decided to write it myself. also you can send me your requests!!
a/n2; f1 fans please don't come after me i know you're expecting the 2nd part of the story with lewis but i have no motivation to write it😭i'll do it some time, but i don't know when. uni has been draining me out so much.
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"please take care of yourself " was the last thing you told simon -your husband - before he left for yet another mission.
now it had been 12 months and there was no sign of him. however, a lot had happened in the past year, but most importantly you had given birth to a beautiful baby girl -all by yourself.
when you had found out that you were expecting, simon was long gone and you had no way to communicate with him. the only thing that you could do was to get through this pregnancy all alone. thank god that maternity leave was a thing, otherwise you had no idea how you could manage having a baby all by yourself.
whatsoever, you couldn't be mad at your husband as a matter of fact that you had found out about your pregnancy only one week after he had left, while the guilt was everyday eating you alive.
you had no idea how he would react though. you were aware of his past and how his father had treated him.
simon is a lovely human being... towards you. he's a sweet, loving and caring husband and you are absolutely sure that he will make a great father.
you had went through a lot during your pregnancy and you could admit that it wasn't an easy one; mood swings, cravings, morning sickness, back pain etc.
the worst part of it all was when you went into labour. you had spent hours and hours trying to bring the little bundle of joy, that you and the love of your life had created together, into this world.
and after many hours of pain and screaming you were finally holding your baby girl in your arms. the first thing that you had noticed about her were her eyes -same as her father's- and that made your eyes well up with tears.
now it had been almost 4 months since you had given birth and the constant stress of taking care of a baby by yourself had tore you apart both physically and emotionally. you were barely sleeping, you had lost your appetite and were actually a walking wreck.
some nights you would spend them in your bed crying yourself to sleep, wishing your husband was here to help you out.
currently, you were taking a shower as you heard your daughter crying. sighing deeply, you got out and wrapped a towel around you as you made your way to the nursery.
you took her in your arms and sat down on the rocking chair, lowering your towel and starting feeding her. once she was fed, you put her back to sleep and went into your room, changing quickly and laying on your bed.
you brought both your arms over your eyes in an attempt to block out any kind of light source and bit on your bottom lip trying not to cry, again.
as your mind wander in different places, you didn't hear the front door opening and closing as well as the heavy footsteps on the staircase.
you only raised your head as you saw your bedroom door opening, revealing your husband.
immediately, you were flooded by many different emotions as you jumped up from the bed and attacked him in a -suffocating- hug.
simon chuckled lightly and wrapped his arms protectively around you and kissed the top of your head.
"i can't believe that you're back." you pulled away for a moment "you're actually back." you embraced him again not having noticed the tears that were spilling from your eyes.
"i'm sorry it took me too long my love" he mumbled on top of your head as he squished you in his arms.
"i missed you" you lifted your head up, looking at him.
"i missed you y/n" he leaned down and slowly brought his lips on top of yours kissing you softly and yet so loving.
sooner or later, however, you broke away as you looked up at him with a huge smile.
"i have to show you something" you said excited and grabbed his hand, leading him out of your bedroom and across the hall way.
you glanced at him anxiously as you slowly opened the door of your baby's room. you turned on the lights and guided simon inside.
you were looking carefully at him as his expression changed from a curious one to a shocked.
"love..." he exclaimed as he turned to look at you while his bottom lip was trembling.
"i found out one week after you left. i had no way to tell you, simon, i'm so sorry" the guilt took over you.
"shh it's okay." he wrapped his arms once again around you as you sobbed into his chest.
"i just... it was awful, simon. first the guilt that there was a way to tell you, but i was too stupid to think about it and second all the pain, the emotions, everything... i just feel so... useless." you cried out.
"hey" he grabbed both your cheeks and looked you in the eye "you're the strongest woman i've ever known in my entire life, y/n. not only for going through a pregnancy and labour by yourself, but also for being able to get through that with being aware of a chance of me never coming back again and yet you got enough courage and look where that brought you love."
it was true. every time he would go on a new mission, the curiosity of his well being would kill you. every single day you were checking you mail for a letter that would be proclaiming your husband dead.
"i love you so much simon" you raised on your tiptoes and buried your face into the crook of his neck.
"i love you more sweetheart." he lifted your head once again and kissed you softly.
you were so grateful for the feeling of his warm, soft lips against yours, kissing them with so much love and care. every single time you would be in his radar, this man would worship the ground you were walking on.
finally, you pulled away with a small smile.
"come on" you guided him towards the crib where the newborn baby was sleeping in soundly.
carefully, you picked her up in your arms and turned towards simon that was looking at his daughter as if she was the most precious thing on earth.
"do you want to hold her?" you suggested.
"i... i don't know how" he admitted and you kissed his cheek smiling.
"that's why i'm here for. i'll show you how." you said and just like that you handed the small baby over to your husband that was feeling as if he was holding the most fragile thing in the world.
"she's... so small." he stroked lightly her rosy cheek with his thump.
what took you aback was that her little hand enveloped his pinky finger, holding it firmly. you gasped and his breath hitched in his throat.
"wow she didn't even do that to me. only knowing you for a few minutes and she's already a daddy's girl." you complained jokingly placing your hands on your hips.
"really doubt that. there's no one better than you." he kissed your forehead and your face broke into a huge smile as you wrapped your arms around your husband, admiring the way your daughter was rested in her father's chest, not really believing that you had finally built a family with the man you loved most in the entire world.
at that moment, you couldn't be more happy.
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beenbaanbuun · 29 days
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Hey!! I just read your most recent Addams!MATZ fic and the angst is DELICIOUS. Your talent for writing is incredible and your creativity really shines through with each and every fic. The fluff, angst, and even the smut are so wonderfully well done, you're one of my favorite ATEEZ writers.
If you're up to it, and feel free to ignore this, but I'd love to see a part two to the angst Addams!MATZ where seonghwa talks to hongjoong and hongjoong comes to apologize. If that's not something you see yourself continuing, I completely understand!
Make sure to keep yourself healthy and hydrated and get plenty of rest.
thank you for the compliments!!! they mean the world to me. i’m glad that my passion for writing and my love for these boys shines through in my work. here is a continuation <333
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seonghwa doesn’t even bother to knock before barging into his husbands office. yes, he thinks anger is an ugly emotion, but that doesn’t mean he is immune to it. in fact, it’s the only thing running through him as he steps through the doorway and slams the heavy slab of oak behind him. hongjoong hasn’t shown you the courtesy of being polite; why should seonghwa show his husband the same.
upon hearing the bang of the door, the overworked businessman turns around, pen still in hand and glasses low on his nose. he was half expecting to see your feisty little self again, but instead he’s met with the sight of his husband. if it weren’t for the sneer that twisted up his husbands pretty face, he might’ve explained the same thing he’d tried explaining to you. something tells him that seonghwa wouldn’t have appreciated being told ‘i’m busy, i’ll come and talk to you when i’m finished designing these pieces.’
“what’s wr—” hongjoong doesn’t even get to finish before seonghwa cuts him off with a scoff and a petty roll of the eyes. it’s hardly like him to wear his emotions on his sleeve, and yet hongjoong can see each one of them clear as day. hurt, anger, disappointment; emotions that he never wants anyone he cares about to feel. his heart sinks just a touch as he realises who those emotions are aimed towards.
“you are a piece of work, hongjoong,” seonghwa spits, sounding beautiful even with venom laced through his voice. hongjoong knows that’s the last thing he should be thinking right now, but he can hardly help admiring his husband, even when he is seething. it takes the man a second or two to knock himself free of the love-induced haze and allow the words to sink in. “do you think you’re in the right for yelling at our darling? do you think that just because you’re overworking yourself it gives you the right to make her cry?”
hongjoong’s world comes to a standstill. the clock on the wall stops ticking, the heart in his chest stops beating, and most importantly, for the first time in weeks, the brain in his head stops thinking. finally, finally, it’s no longer filled with a myriad of complex ideas, each one overlapping yet individual in its own right. finally he just has one singular thought. it’s just a shame it isn’t a good one.
he made you cry…
hongjoong made you cry…
it repeats in his head, over and over like a mantra. it taunts him, the idea that he’d upset you so much feeling like nails on a chalkboard. his hairs stand on end and his breath catches in his throat. lord below, what has he done.
“where is she?” his voice is weak, pathetic, nothing like he usually sounds. seonghwa has to admit that his resolve takes a hit when he hears it leave his loves mouth. he reminds himself to remain strong; your pain is his priority right now. “seonghwa, please—”
“take a guess, hongjoong,” seonghwa replies, once again cutting his husband off. this time it wasn’t out of anger but of fear that he might cave if he has to listen to hongjoong’s heartbroken pleas for much longer. the pained look on his face is enough to send seonghwa’s heart into overdrive; he doesn’t need any more distractions from the real reason he’s here. “where might you usually find her when she isn’t with one of us?”
the rug in front of the fire—jongho.
hongjoong almost feels ashamed that he even had to ask; he should’ve realised the second you silently left his office that you’d gone to seek comfort in your favourite onikuma. realistically, though, he should’ve realised a lot of things. it hurts him to know that he was too focused on work to do so.
he stands, and he’s grateful when seonghwa shifts to the side to allow him past, even going as far as to re-open the heavy door for him. hongjoong isn’t quite sure he deserves the soft hand that’s placed against his back as he walks through the doorway, but he appreciates it nonetheless. now isn’t the time to be wondering how he ended up with such a beautiful individual as a soulmate, but he finds himself lingering on that thought as the two of them begin their journey to the living room. it’s hard not to when the warmth of seonghwa’s touch never once leaves him.
in fact, it’s only when the two of them step through the archway that seonghwa gives a small shove to the bottom of hongjoong’s spine before going to reclaim his spot on the couch. with a single nod in your direction, seonghwa redirects his husband’s attention and hongjoong lets his gaze flicker to the floor.
the first thing he’s met with is a glare from the mutt he’d been so reluctant to allow into his abode. normally, the beast would be scolded for being so bold as to openly disrespect his master, but he let it slide this time. he can hardly tell him not to give him the attitude he so clearly deserves. in fact, this is light compared to what he would’ve expected from the overprotective creature.
at least hongjoong knows he’ll make a wonderful guard dog…
“dove,” hongjoong coos softly as he dips down to your level. he can’t remember the last time he’d sat on the floor, but this feels necessary. the closeness is something that he finds himself craving, wanting nothing more than to have you next to him again. he won’t lie and claim that the sole purpose of this is to comfort you; he needs it too, to stave off the guilt that has begun to eat him alive. “can you look at me?”
there’s a certain element of pain in his voice that tells you he’s being sincere. that he truly does feel remorse for how he treated you. whether or not it’s seonghwa that forced it upon him, you don’t particularly care. all you want is to feel hongjoong’s warmth again, so you listen. you turn your head until your watery eyes meet his.
“there she is,” he gives you a humourless chuckle, a sad smile twisting the corners of his mouth up and the corners of his eyebrows down. the warmth of his hand as he places it on your cheek is comforting; more so than any words he could say. you just need him close. he seems to realise that as he turns to the werewolf, dangerously aware of the way his ears twitch angrily above his head. “may i take her, yeosang? i promise i’ll be gentle with her.”
“you weren’t gentle with her earlier,” yeosang growls, behaving more akin to what hongjoong expects from him. it almost has hongjoong flinching back in fear of yet another bite-shaped bruise on his hand.
“that’s true, but i would like i make it up to her,” hongjoong is soft as he speaks, less so for the sake of the angry mutt, and more for the sake of you. he doesn’t want you to see any more anger from him. “besides i really think it should be my little dove’s decision as to whether i get to hold her, don’t you?” yeosang snarls, huffing in dismay as he unravels his arms from you and lets hongjoong swoop you into his. manipulation never really has been the man’s style, but he has to admit that it works wonders with the mutt. use you as leverage, and yeosang will behave like a fully trained lapdog. he’s just like them in that respect; so desperate to make you happy that they’d risk everything, dignity included.
it’s not hard for you to let yourself be passed around like some kind of teddy bear as a pose to a real, living human. you’re tired from crying, not to mention desperate for the confirmation that you’re still hongjoong’s good girl. in fact, as hongjoong tugs you into his grasp like a rag doll, you find yourself leaning into his grasp. it’s so soft compared to his sharp words and cutting tone earlier, and his familiar scent of spices fills your nostrils. it dizzies you, but hongjoong is there to catch you…
“i’m sorry,” he whispers into your ear as he pulls you up to straddle his crossed legs, “my darling dove, will you forgive me?”
you don’t answer. you don’t find it necessary to. the way you see it there’s nothing to forgive; you annoyed him, he yelled at you. it’s give and take, and despite your emotions getting the better of you, you refuse to place the blame on hongjoong. not all of it, at least.
“only if you forgive me too,” is the answer you finally settle on, mumbling it into his neck. he squirms a little at the tickling sensation, and in your own mind, you find yourself thinking he’s cute.
“you have nothing to forgive, my dove,” he answers, “but if it will make you forgive me, then yes; i forgive you…”
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