#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy
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200 Brooklyn 99 Prompts
Rosa
1 “Talk to him, that's what friends do.” “Nope. I'm gonna wait 'til I'm on my deathbed, get in the last word and then die immediately.” “That's your plan for dealing with this?” “That's my plan for dealing with everything. I have seventy-seven arguments I'm going to win that way.”
2 “I'm already seeing somebody, NAME.” “Oh, and just like that, things got interesting.” “And just like that, I left.”
3 “NAME is even wearing his/her formal leather jacket.” “It's the one without any blood on it.”
4 “Right, that's the guy/girl you said the lame stuff about. Like he’s/she's a good listener.” “Sorry, what do you look for in a guy/girl?” “Real stuff, like the shape of his/her ass.”
5 “Sorry I'm late. I had to go back to the deli and return my Everything Bagel. In what world does everything not include beef jerky?” “All of them.”
6 “He/She also likes to look up recipes online and go, "Who's got the time?"
7 “Thank you, NAME. Your entire life is garbage.”
8 “NAME , tell us about your family.” “I have one.”
9 “Anyone over the age of six celebrating a birthday should go to hell.”
10 “I am dating his/her nephew/niece. Now we are hanging out on weekends. What is next? Oh! Small talk.”
11 “Wait, is that a smile I see?” “Possibly. My immune system is too weak to fight off my smile muscles.”
12 “Whoa, what happened? You know what, forget it. I'll just read NAME’s notes.”
13 “NAME? Are you stuck in there?” “No, I'm in here by choice.” “Oh, 'cause I hear some banging noises as if someone was struggling to open the door.” “No. That was the pipes.” “Or, is it the sound of you learning how to ask for help? You know, you can't spell ‘independent’ without ‘dependent.’” “And you can't spell ‘Go [bleep] yourself’ without ‘[bleep] you.’”
14 “I've said "excuse me" more times this morning than I have in my entire life. Twice!”
15 “Oh, nothing better after a long shift than coming to BAR NAME. It's like Cheers, where everybody knows your name.” “A place where everybody knows your name is hell. You're describing hell.”
16 “So, what is this? Casual, serious? I need to know how to make fun of you.”
17 “NAME and I broke up. He/She ate soup too much.” “What, like every day?” “It happened twice.”
18 “So, what are you drinking?” “I'll have a margarita. But, like, a skinny margarita. So, like, tequila, lime, and a tiny splash of agave.” “Mm. I refuse to order that.”
19 “What are you looking all wistful about?” “Just thinking, about relationships and love, and how I'm way better at them than I thought I'd be. Should I do a TED Talk on it?” “Doesn't seem any dumber than all the other TED Talks.”
20 “Why didn't you tell me? I had no idea things were getting that serious.” “Yeah, it's very embarrassing having feelings.”
21 “So are you bringing someone to the wedding?” “No, I'm taking a break from dating for a while.” “What?” “I'm sick of asking people how many siblings they have. Oh, is it somewhere between zero and two? How fascinating.”
22 “I grew a goatee and it looks amazing, and I know you can see it.” “Of course we can see it, NAME. It's horrible.”
23 “It feels like you're being a little harsh.” “Thanks, good note. I was going for extremely harsh. I'll turn it up.”
24 “Are your senses heightened?” “I think I might be pregnant, not bitten by a radioactive spider.”
25 “You're what sneezes are!”
26 “Seriously, you guys should stand up once in a while. You know, for your hearts.”
27 “NAME, this is dumb. I'm just gonna go.” “No, no, no. You promised me more time. I still have seven minutes.” “I really don't want to miss my flight, and I cannot physically stand the way that room smells anymore.” “Just breathe through your mouth.”
28 “You know, some people say, ‘Mo money, mo problems,’ but those people are idiots. Money's amazing.”
29 “Dude, just admit you ruined everything and turned our lives into a living hell. No biggie.”
30 “We don't want anyone getting alcohol poisoning, so if you throw up, you're disqualified.” “I never throw up. I just tell my stomach to deal with it. My body is terrified of me.”
Jake
31 “I also have a hairline fracture in my thumb. Mankind's least important finger, am I right?”
32 “I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood's supposed to be.”
33 “How much could I possibly owe you? Fifty, sixty bucks?” “Two thousand, four hundred and thirty seven dollars.” “Dollars?! Wait, of course dollars. Why was that the part I was surprised by?”
34 “So, I'm going to grab a healthy breakfast.” “Are those gummy bears wrapped in a fruit roll-up?” “Breakfast burrito, but yeah.” “I pity your dentist.” “Joke's on you. I don't have a dentist.”
35 “I'm talking to my credit card company. I tried to get an online subscription to the New Yorker and they declined me. Apparently, based on my previous purchases, they assumed it was fraud. That's crazy. I'm fancy. One time I had coffee-flavored ice cream.”
36 “Rules are made to be broken.” “They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken.” “Uh, piñatas.” “Glow sticks.” “Karate boards.” “Spaghetti when you have a small pot.” “Rules.”
37 “Hey, can I ask you something?” “Mm-hmm.” “If the toilets drain into the ocean, does that mean a tiny shark could swim up and bite me in the butt?” “No, not at all.” “Psh, lame.”
38 “NAME, super important question. Which one of these shirts should I wear to dinner with your dad/mom tonight?” “Those are exactly the same.” “I have a signature look, NAME.”
39 “Hello, good sir, I'd like your finest bottle of wine, please.” “That will be $1,600.” “Great, I'd like your $8-est bottle of wine, please.”
40 “I am straight-up depressed. NAME’s been doing her best to cheer me up. He/She gave me this sticker this morning just for waking up.” “Ew, it's like you're dating your teacher.” “I know, it's so hot.”
41 “Wait. Before you say anything, I want to guess what happened based on your face. Someone died. No! You won a prize. I'm not getting better at this.”
42 “What is the bandwidth on the wifi here? We have much content to stream.”
43 “Oh, you sweaty, chair-spinning morons. You're gonna get us out of here.”
44 “Sir, I think I speak for all of us when —“ “He/She doesn't.” “He/She doesn't.”
45 “So, your brother/sister's a bit of a nightmare.” “I wouldn't say that. I mean, at most, he’s/she's a daymare.” “Those are so much scarier.” “Yeah.”
46 “Look, NAME, I burnt two hundred calories.” “That's your heart rate.” “Yeah, that checks out.”
47 “I don't slump, people. I opposite of slump. I pmuls. That's slump backwards and it's what I do. I pmuls all over this bitch.”
48 “Excuse me. We were just looking for a place to —“ “Boink.” “Yes, boink. That's my preferred term for it, too.”
49 “Thank you for doing this. I love you.” “Noice. Smort. I love you too.”
50 “Adult parties? I believe they're called orgies.”
51 “I have a sexy voice!
Champagne.
Mountain range.
Hugs.”
52 “Has anyone ever told you you look just like a statue?” “Yes.”
53 “NAME, you're smiling. It's very weird. Like seeing a turtle out of its shell.”
54 “You look happy. Let me guess. Your egg sandwich fell on the floor, and they gave it to you for free.” “No. Can you do that? Why doesn't everyone just drop their sandwiches on the floor?” “I was trying to insult you.” “And instead you gave me an amazing life hack!”
55 “So, we gonna talk about what happened back there? I haven't seen someone cry that much since NAME heard they were remaking ‘First Wives Club.’”
56 “Hey, there, NAME. Everything okay?” “No, I'm having a meltdown.” “Props. That was amazing.” “Thanks. It was a lot of work.”
57 “Almost makes me wanna take things seriously all the time. But then I'm like ‘boobs, farts, boobs, whatever’.”
58 “Ahh, babe, this is so nice. There are hot stones on our butts for no reason.” “Not on mine. My butt stones keep falling off, because I'm so tense about NAME being here and ruining everything.”
59 “Okay, don't shoot! That's how people get shot.”
60 “Rule number 3: Let's not have sex right away.” “Cool. Cool cool cool cool cool. No doubt, no doubt, no doubt. Good rule. No sex. Good rule.”
Charles
61 “Okay, but I thought since you were in charge, maybe I could be your right hand man? Your Tinker Bell?” “Tinker Bell?” “Let me tell you something about Tinker Bell. Tinker Bell is a loyal lieutenant and a real thorn in the side of Captain Hook.”
62 “NAME, why don't you show Danger what a fax machine is.” “Okay. Imagine a letter had unprotected sex with a phone.”
63 “Hey, NAME, are you ready to go streaking?” “What?” “That's what my dad/mom and I called getting blonde streaks in your hair. We used to do it to our ponytails on road trips. You just take a little lemon up top, and let the sun do the rest. We called it giving each other road head.” “You just said you called it going streaking.” “It had a couple names.”
64 “So we have good news, and we have bad news.” “My Nana always said, ‘Bad news first because the good news is probably a lie.’ Fun fact: she made me cry a lot.”
65 “What about me? What if something happens to NAME, and he never gets to meet my baby? I don't want to hang out with some stupid baby who's never met NAME.”
66 “Oh, you're right. I'm gonna tell him/her. It might not be today. It might not be tomorrow. It definitely won't be later than tomorrow. So pretty much today or tomorrow then.”
67 “No! I was eavesdropping. I'm always eavesdropping.” “I don't like it.” “Look, I didn't spend the last seven years watching your love ripen, only to have it sullied by a city hall wedding. You're getting married right here, right now.”
68 “I know you think my judgement's clouded because I like him/her a little bit.” “You doodled your wedding invitation.” “No, that's our joint tombstone.” “My mistake.”
69 “How many times have I smacked you in your face?” “Lost count.” “And you still have no fear of me.” “I'm trying to read your womb vibe.” “Exactly. Knock it off.”
70 “Okay, first of all, NAME, you look amazing. Secondly, I made an appointment at the salon with Nikki, for you, under the name Gabriella Fuentes de San Miguel Estrada. I had fun with the name.” “Clearly.”
71 “He’s/She's got a type, which is really any one but you.” “Yeah, that was my ex-husband/ex-wife's type, too.”
72 “Sexy train is leaving the station. Check out this caboose. Later, sluts.”
73 “I can't wait to see you, my luscious little breakfast quiche. I just want to draw you a bubble bath and spoon-feed you caviar. I think we should open up a joint checking account. I love you. [pause] What am I doing?” “It's okay. I hung up right after ‘Chucklebunny’.” “Help me. I've gone Full NAME.”
74 “Do you desire a crispen potato?” “Oh, don't mind if I do-ble. Wait a minute. Crispen potato. Why are you fancy talking.” “How dare you, sir/madam. I speak the common tongue.” “There it is again. You only do that when you're lying or hiding something.” “Hiding? Ha. Pish-posh.”
75 “Hey, donut holes. Don't mind if I do. Eurgh! Fish? Fish donuts, NAME? What is wrong with you?” “It's takoyaki. I'm drowning my sorrows in octopus balls.”
76 “Put on a T-shirt for all I care. It doesn't matter what you wear.” “Of course it matters. He has to wear the smaller checks. Big checks wash him out. Where are you, NAME?”
77 “Ooh, if they have your phone, we can track where they're going. I have ‘Find My Phone’ set up to track you. What? I do that for all my friends, not just you.” “Show me.” “There's no time!”
78 “You okay?” “Yeah, no burns. The doctor said I was lucky my body was so damp.”
79 “You guys have been down here for two hours. What, did you have sex forty times?”
80 “What? You don't need closet space. You have, like, one outfit.”
81 “You just graduated pie school, bitches. [pause] Sorry I said bitches, I'm just really worked up.”
82 “So, I know you're NAME’s best friend, and —“ “Did he/she say that? Did you get that on tape?” “No.” “No, he/she didn't say that or no, you didn't get it on tape? Doesn't matter. Either way, you screwed up big time.”
83 “What you did is the culinary equivalent of unprotected sex.”
84 “That's right. Boom. Just kicked Santa in the testicles.”
85 “No, there's no one in my life. [wink] Sort of a sad thing to wink about, I realize now.”
86 “NAME! Were you dreaming about NAME again?” “Why did you wake me up?! I told you never to wake me up!”
87 “You used all the touching time, NAME. I get 100% of the goodbye touching time. 100%.”
88 “Do you wanna know why he/she went out with him/her and not you?” “Yeah.” “Because he/she actually asked him/her out.”
89 “NAME, will you taste this batter?” “Mm-hmm. Hmm. I think it's a little off.” “You know what's off? Your mouth! Why NAME lets your stupid tongue anywhere near him/her I'll never know. Nope, I forgot the sugar. That's on me.”
90 “There's no need for NAME to see me unleash the beast.”
Captain Holt
91 “Look at you. Always working. What happened to my fun big/little brother/sister?” “Fun? I was never fun. You take that back.”
92 “It's the most fun day of the year. Something you wouldn't understand because you're not programmed to feel joy.” “Yes, but my software is due for an exuberance upgrade.”
93 “Sticks and stones, NAME.” “Describing your breakfast?”
94 “NAME, how are you feeling?” “Better today. I even managed to eat some plain toast this morning.” “Smart. Something bland.” “That's my favorite breakfast.”
95 “Joining us for lunch, Sir?” “Oh, no, I've already consumed the required calories for this day period.” “Yummy.”
96 “You all right, NAME? Tough weekend?” “I went to Barbados with my husband/wife. We wove hats out of palm fronds and swam with the stingrays. I've never been happier.”
97 “Maybe I should wing it. Love, it sustains you. It's like oatmeal.” “Okay. Okay. Not bad for winging it.” “I lied. Took me two hours to write that.”
98 “I do not have a problem. If I want to play Kwazy Cupcakes, I will play Kwazy Cupcakes. Kwazy is a difficult word to say in anger, but I think I've made my feelings clear.”
99 “This place is so romantic.” “Yeah, and so intimate.” “Don't worry. I'm not listening to you. I'm just thinking about how this sea bass is cold but not as cold and cruel as the hands of fate that have thrust my entire life into darkness.” “Ah, damn it. I just ordered the sea bass.”
100 “Yeah, and your new shirt is very aggressive and confusing. Is the pineapple the slut, or is it calling someone else a slut?” “Clearly the pineapple is the slut.” “Huh.”
101 “Oh, I've caused a problem. I think I am getting a text message. Bloop. Ah, there it is.”
102 “So nice of you to greet us, NAME. I thought surely you'd still be crushed under that house in Munchkinland.”
103 “So, do you NAME --“ “Yes.” “And do you --“ “Yes. Yes. We do. We're married.”
104 “I mean, don't people call you NAME?” “How dare you.”
105 “So you lied to me? Out of pity. You pity me.” “I wouldn't put it that way.” “I would. I am offended. I am angry. I am very tired. So I'm gonna take a nap, but when I wake up, oh, you are in for it.”
106 “Look at that. You've helped me find my smile.”
107 “Huh. Meat from the street. Sounds like a fun treat. Hah. I'm a poet and ... I didn't even know I was rhyming those words. But it happened anyway.”
108 “Oh, look at that. An alert. I'm probably trending already. What? My account has been deactivated?” “Twitter thinks you're a bot.” “Why? I am a human. I am a human male/female.”
109 “Care to sit? I'm sure you'd like to take some weight off your cloven hooves.” “Call me the devil, NAME? How original.” “Actually, I was calling you a goat. You goat.”
110 “NAME! I'm coming with you.” “Thank you, NAME.” “I'm also coming.” “Not necessary.”
111 “Spot checks are done. Needless to say I'm thoroughly underwhelmed.” “Huh. From your expression, I would have guessed constipated. Or chilly.”
112 “NAME, you have a pretty low bar for what you consider drama. Once, I used an exclamation point in a email. You called me Diana Ross.” “I assure you, in this case, I do not exaggerate.”
113 “I know they say it's not good to have a TV in the bedroom. Which is why I don't.”
114 “NAME, did you just laugh?” “Uproariously.”
115 “You know when you play along with the robot jokes, it kinda ruins my enjoyment of them?” “Yes, I know.”
116 “And what do you hope to get out of this, NAME? Let me guess revenge on Dorothy for killing your sister?”
117 “It was a good game though for a dumbass.” Okay, you're kinda overusing that one. Maybe switch it up a little bit.” “Oh, good note. You dick.” “That landed good.”
118 “Dancing over. Situation defused.” “No!”
119 “All right, NAME, I'm sick of you wasting time. So, yes, I spilled some minestrone on my pants and I'm sitting in my underwear. Happy?”
120 “You found me. Drinking seltzer in the shadows.”
Gina
121 “It's a sloppy Jessica. Mac n cheese, chili, pizza on a bun. Its everything I've wanted to eat for the last 48 hours.” “What happened? I thought you were gonna 'last forever bitches.'” “Turns out I gave up easy. You hear that bitches? I gave up so easy.”
122 “If NAME had a twin, he/she would have eaten him/her in the womb.”
123 “Wait a minute, I think I just figured something out. I got to go.” “Aren't you forgetting something?” [person a gives Person b a kiss on the forehead] “Uh no, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?”
124 “The English language can not fully capture the depth and complexity of my thoughts. So I'm incorporating Emoji into my speech to better express myself. Winky face.”
125 “All right, gang. Diet day 4. How's everyone holding up?” “Honestly, I'm going to last forever. You hear that bitches? I'm gonna last forever.”
126 “If I die, turn my tweets into a book!”
127 “The only reason I didn't tell you is I don't value you as people, so why be honest?”
128 “Breakups are a cartoony thumbs down. They make people feel face-with-Xs-for-the-eyes.”
129 “I'm sorry. I just don't think this is something you're good at.” “What? The only thing I'm not good at is modesty, because I'm great at it.”
130 “Click. I just captured the exact moment you realized you had failed. I guess we all got something out of this.”
131 “It's so addictive, right? I play so much that when I close my eyes at night, I just see cupcakes instead of my normal dizzying array of flashing lights.”
132 “Forget your ex with meaningless sex. It rhymes because it's true.”
133 “NAME. NAME. NAME, I screwed up, big time.” “NAME, given your daily life experiences, you're gonna have to be more specific.”
134 “So, talk to me, goose. How are we looking?” “Sexy, but not like we're trying too hard. Like, sure, we're trying, but it's almost effortless.”
135 “Give me the ring.” “You sound like Gollum.” “That means nothing to me. I don't see those movies, I'm too pretty.”
136 “Oh no, six drink NAME isn't fun. He’s/She's just sad. Damn it!”
137 “I never have second thoughts. That's the luxury of having great first thoughts.”
138 “Ugh, constantly getting NAME’s approval is the worst.” “Yes. I can only imagine.”
139 “You think you can just bully people, but you can't. It's not okay. I'm the bully around here. Ask anyone.”
140 “This just might work out after all.” “You're damn right it will, 'cause we're a ragtag, scrappity, fart-dumb, moron parade, smart-ass team!”
141 “Okay, NAME, stop freaking out. I have the day off. I can step in and help.” “Yeah, me too. I'm not off, but I come and go as I please. It's part of my charm. I'm like an outdoor cat.”
142 “Gina, please keep an eye on NAME today. He's/She’s gonna say something to the wrong person and get himself/herself punched.” “Sure, I'd love to see NAME get punched.” “Try again.” “I will stop NAME from getting punched.” “Correct.”
143 “Oh, I want him/her out. But I'm too scared to tell him/her. “ “All right, listen. I know that your spirit animal is a caterpillar that's been stepped on —“ “Mm-hmm.”
144 “What are you creeps doing? You made me look away from my phone. You better pray I didn't miss a text.” “In the two seconds you looked away?” “Seventeen texts. All of them important.”
145 “What is my favorite soup?” “Chicken noodle.” “Potato leek.” “Corn frickin' noodle. I mean, chowder, damn it.” “You're all wrong. I've never had soup.” “Don't bother. They all suck.”
146 “Okay, so that plumber was useless. But we are two smart and capable people who can definitely figure out how to fix a toilet.” “Of course we can. The internet will tell us what to do. She always does.”
147 “It's crazy how much he/she flirts with me.”
148 “Good morning.” “For whom?” “For you-m.”
149 “So he/she didn't say what happened, which can only mean one thing.” “He's/She’s in a fight club.”
150 “What's up? How can I help?” “Well, when I was a kid, I invented a magnetic flashlight clip so I could read under the covers. This clip and I went all around the world together the Shire, Sweet Valley High, Terabithia.” “But never to a friend's house, huh?” “Uncalled for.”
Amy
151 “That stuff with us is in the past. We talked about that.” “I know, but that was before you saw me in this dope ass tux. I mean you must be freaking out.” “Oh, I really am. I'm really into rented clothes. I love how many butts have been in them.”
152 “You know, we're birds of a feather, you and I.” “I hate cliches.” “Cliches are the worst.”
153 “And now I don't know what to do.” “I think you do know what to do.” “Thanks, NAME.” [leaves the room] “I have no idea what he’s/she's gonna do but that's the safest way to give NAME advice.” “Yep.”
154 “Insult me all you want, for I have only this to say —“ “Victory shall be mine!” “I heard you practicing in the shower. You can't surprise me. Letting me into your life was the worst mistake you ever made.” “Cool, fun take on our relationship.”
155 “NAME, where you at?” “Four drinks.” “What's four-drink NAME again?” “Why don't you come over here and find out?” “Right, Horny NAME”
156 “I'm sorry. We only excluded you because you're kind of an over-texter.” “Over-texter? That's not even a thing.” “Oh really? So you don't remember the time you sent 97 unanswered texts in a five-minute span?” “My phone vibrated itself off the desk. I think it was committing suicide.”
157 “What the hell? I used NAME's exact recipe. I know I'm not a great cook, but I love following instructions.”
158 “What's going on? Is this a dream? No, I'm not holding a label maker.”
159 “My power went out last night and my alarm didn't go off.” “Your alarm is power dependent? You brought this on yourself, son.”
160 “I'd also like to apologize for my friend. His /Her parents didn't give him/her enough attention.”
161 “I'm in! A bet which improves someone's manners? Double score.”
162 “He’s/She's scared.” “He’s/She's not scared. With all due respect, NAME, NAME has no feelings.”
163 “I'm so cold even my fiery dance moves aren't keeping me warm.”
164 “I'm sorry. I tried to be myself and they hated it.”
165 “All right, someone's gotta go out there and kill that feathery bastard. NAME, you're always looking for an excuse to behead something.”
Sergeant Jeffords
166 “It was like taking candy from a baby.” “Why are you giving candy to a baby in the first place? Don't give candy to a baby! They can't brush their teeth!”
167 “I was raised on disco. Little NAME loved to hustle.”
168 “Or is your favorite artist really Taylor Swift?” [Scoffs] “No.” “Lie.” “All right, fine, she is. She makes me feel things.” “She makes all of us feel things!”
169 “Urgh, what's in these?” “Potatoes, butter, a little milk. Oh, and I ran out of salt, so I used baking soda.” “Why wouldn't you? They're both white powders. Of course they're interchangeable.” “Yeah.”
170 “I warned you against using donuts. They're my trigger food.”
171 “Hey, NAME, you know how you're really good at doodling?” “I know you think you're complimenting me, but calling them doodles is an insult. You a big fan of Picasso's doodles?”
172 “Your tone's braggy but your words are real sad.”
173 “See, NAME? Tough love works.” “Damn it! NAME proved the wrong point.”
174 “Now, be respectful and grieve your asses off.” “I don't know why this is happening.” “NAME, I love it. Everyone follow his/her lead!”
175 “Everything's spoiled. My lunch is ruined. My chicken, my potatoes, pasta, my meatballs, ham, my yogurt.” “Wow, that's a lot of yogurt.” “I love yogurt.”
176 “Kind of seemed like you were gonna get up and leave after saying all that.” “I was, but I think I hear NAME.”
177 “You better look cute in this picture, or no one's gonna want you. Do something with your damn paws!”
178 “My tolerance has really changed since I had kids!”
179 “I'm hungry!” “Oh, you're in luck; the fanny pack is filled with granola.” “Mmm! Loose granola.” “I don't want fanny granola! I want steaks and whiskey!”
180 “You probably can't tell, but I'm flexing my brain like crazy right now.”
181 “What's that smell? That's lavender. NAME loves lavender.”
182 “Okay. Excuse me. Can we please eat? My body is starting to digest itself. NAME needs nutrients!”
183 “Don't look at me. NAME wastes all that time building muscles, make him do it.” “Oh, come on, you all know these are just for show.”
184 “Sorry? You bumbling son of a bitch. You just ruined my life. I hope you get hit by a truck and a dog takes a dump on your face.” “Nothing to see here. Just a little hypoglycaemic rage. Move along.”
185 “I feel like a proud mama hen whose baby chicks have learned to fly!”
Hitchcock
186 “NAME, why do you have your shirt off?” “Can't spill food on your shirt if you're not wearing one.”
187 “What bet? What are you guys talking about?” “Seriously? The bet? They've been keeping score all year. It comes up all the time. What are you doing all day?!” “Nothing. Why, you want to hang out?”
188 “So you just want us to lie on the ground and do nothing like a bunch of losers?” “Yes, precisely.” “No!” “Jackpot!”
189 “I don't like it. Something stinks.” “Well, I'm sorry, but I refuse to mask my natural musk with a bunch of chemicals.”
190 “My God. NAME, are you the only person still making sense?” “Yeah. It's bad.”
191 “All right, food is ready, decorations are set, guests should start arriving any moment, and the chairs are still perfection.” “He/She said they're perfection. I'm so proud of you, buddy.” “It was you. You made this happen.”
192 “Who do you think it's gonna be?” “I've no idea.” “I bet it's me. I just hope I'm ready.”
193 “Okay, look, this was maybe a weird way to start the night, but the good news is, we can still make our dinner reservation and no one got hurt.” “Actually, I cut myself real bad.” “Of course you did.”
Scully
194 “Oh, so your plan is to not take this seriously at all?” “Oh, I am as serious as a heart attack. No offense, NAME.” “Nah. Mine are never that serious. I call 'em ‘oopsies’.”
195 “I miss my home chair.” “You miss a chair?”
196 “Are those thumbtacks? What the hell, NAME?” “I thought they'd make good confetti.” “Why?”
197 “All right, anyone else have questions? NAME, NAME, you've been weirdly silent.” “We didn't want to say anything that would get us uninvited.”
198 “Okay, first of all, I want to say that this was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make. There is so much talent in this room.” “Just tell us, bitch. Act as if you already have the role.”
199 “I'll be back. Don't move.” “Not a problem. I hate moving.”
200 “Where should we begin? Do you have any experience with puzzles?” “Yes. I've never solved one.”
#brooklyn 99 prompts#brooklyn 99 quotes#jake peralta#rosa diaz#amy santiago#gina linetti#captain holt#sergeant jeffords#terry jeffords#charles boyle#scully b99#hitchcock b99#bb 99 prompts#bb 99 quotes#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell
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Quarantine Series: Burnt Out
Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader
Summary: Y/N has to work from home during Quarantine, but when she gets extremely busy it’s up to Tom to find a way to help her relax .
A/N: This is my second attempt at this piece. Last time I created this it was super long but it got deleted 😩
Check the Rest: Burnt Out | A New Look | Secret Cuts & Kisses | Breaking Friendships |The Birthday Week | Movie Night | Silence is Golden?|
All Y/N ever wanted was an opportunity to work from home. Then again, who wouldn't want that opportunity? All she could think about was how nice it’d be to work in the comfort of her own home, not have to dress up in business professional clothing, and most importantly be surrounded by the people she cared for the most. But as the saying goes, “Be careful for what you wish for.”
When a global pandemic decided to take over 2020, Y/N certainly got her wish. Her company was forced to work from home until further notice, but what she didn’t expect was the amount of work she would be given. Y/N was pulled from project to project with deadlines thin as paper, and was expected to pick up the extra work of those that were no longer with the company. There was no time to catch a breath, and there certainly was no time to spend with her beloved boyfriend, Tom. This only made Y/N more depressed and made the Holland boys only more concerned.
“Mate, you got to get her to take a break. She’s gonna overdo it.” Harrison commented to his best friend, as they watched Y/N type away like a zombie from the kitchen.
“You think I don’t know that?!” Tom responded with a defeated sigh. “Every time I ask her, she always brushes it off and claims shes fine. Don't get me wrong, Im proud of her and admire her work ethic, but damn its sucking the life out of her.”
Both Harrison and Tom continued to observe Y/N with a cup of tea on hand, wondering how long it would take before she snapped. Tom hated seeing her like this. To him this wasn’t fair. It’s not fair that her 8 hour shift now became a 15 hr shift. Its not fair that she had to work 3 weekends straight, and it certainly wasn’t fair that her company took precious time away to be together. It was hard enough already that he couldn’t spend time with Y/N like a normal boyfriend would because of filming. Now, that he has the opportunity to make up for the lost time, it’s taken away.
“What if you surprised her?” Harrison quipped.
Tom looked up at his best friend with curious eyes. It took a few minutes to sink in, until the brightest idea figuratively smacked him in the face. “Yeah...yeah!” he responded, a smile forming “And I think I know exactly how to do it.”
As Tom was working through the thought process of his brilliant plan, his younger brother entered the kitchen, looking for his usual afternoon snack. “Hey, does anyone know where —. Oh no...” Harry groaned as he looked up at Tom and Harry. “Whatever it is that you two are planning...Leave me out of it.”
“Come on, mate. You dont even know what were planning.” Harrison defended
“Believe me, I know enough and any plan that involves you in it, is likely to fail 99.9% of the time.” Harry opened up his bag of crisps as he continued to list out the other 99 possible reason why they should have left Y/N alone like she wanted. “Cmon guys, you know how she gets. When she doesnt want to be bothered, she doesnt want to be bothered.”
“You’re right Harry, but she’s so stressed, she’s homesick, and one day she’s going to overdo it. Id be a shit boyfriend, if I let it happen.” Tom reasoned. “Look, Im not trying to do anything crazy here. I just want to give her that sense of comfort and see her relax.”
Harry looked at his brother and then at Harrison, both displaying their best puppy dog eyes, in hopes that he’ll join in. “The face doesnt work on me...but I’ll help for Y/N’s sake.”
Meanwhile, Y/N continued her work in the living room, her eyes firmly glued to the computer screen. After being dragged into the kitchen and the Holland plan, Tuwaine slowly made his way to Y/N. “Hey Y/N.” he happily greeted. “I think it’s time for you get some fresh air, don’t you think?”
Y/N looked up, her glasses slightly shifting forward down her nose. “You know theres this thing called being stuck in Quaratine right?” she responded, continuing to code her project.
“I think the real question is do you really want to work here when there’s just nothing but CONSTANT NOISE !” Tuwaine yelled out, hoping the others would catch on.
“What?!” Tom yelled back. It took him some time to realize what Tuwaine meant by his statement. “Oh...Right!” Quickly, Tom grabbed whatever pot or pan he could grab his hands on and dropped them on the counter. Harrison and Harry gave Tom the strangest look. “What? I gave him some noise?”, he shrugged.
“See?” Tuwaine smiled back at Y/N. “You wouldnt want to distract that working brain of yours with all this going on, right?” Y/N furrowed her eyebrows as Tuwaine as she looked at him and the closed off kitchen. Did they think she was born yesterday? Of course she knew they were up to something. None of the boys were subtle enough to keep everything hush hush.
Y/N shook her head and decided to just go with it. The faster she complied, the faster they’d leave her alone, which only meant more time to finish her work. Tuwaine helped carry her laptop, mouse, and charger to the porch as he led her outside. “See, arent you glad your outside, breathing in fresh air with no distractions?”, Tuwaine spoke out.
Y/N took her time to admire the view. “Wow”, she whispered under her breath. Y/N couldnt remember the last time she set foot outdoors. Seeing the sunlight hit the flower beds, the gentle breeze rustle through the grass; it was beautiful. Of course, the moment was short lived with a simple ding, which only multiplied by the second.
Y/N dripped her head back, trying to rub out the frustration from her face. “Yes, well it was fun while it lasted. Duty calls.”
“Im sure they wouldnt mind if you just took five minutes for yourself at least.” Tuwaine commented, feeling bad about the amount of work he saw popping up on your screen.
“Yeah well that’s Corporate for you. Doesnt matter if you’re 500 km away or if a virus is hurting the population. If you’re not working, you’re useless.” Y/N shrugs. It wasn’t like her company was completely evil, this was just how business worked.
“I know Y/N, and we all see that you care deeply about your work but we’re all so worried about you too. We want you to be mentally okay as well. I know Tom is worried about you the most...He misses you, you know.”
Y/N’s heart dropped the second she heard him say it. She knew that all of this was gonna take some time away from Tom, but she hadn’t realized how much he would be missing her, even though they’re living under the same roof. “Yeah I miss him too, more than anyone will know. Believe me.” Y/N pondered for a moment as she stared at the work in front of her. Perhaps five minutes couldn’t hurt. “Maybe I will take that break after all.”
“Really?”, Tuwaine was surprised she had agreed so quickly, and at the same time he panicked. Tom and the others were not ready for Y/N’s surprise yet. “On second thought, Im wrong. You should keep going and try to finish up that project of yours or else you’ll never be done.”
“Excuse me?” Y/N asked as she tried to close her laptop. “You just spent a whole half hour trying to convince me to stop working, and now you want me to go back and work?”
“Yeah..I mean what do I know, right?” He laughed nervously. Tuwaine looked back at the door, for some sort of signal. Come on man it’s not like your preparing a break for the Queen of England.
“Listen Tuwaine, if I go back there and you boys break anything in that house...I swear— I’ll”
“Y/N!” Tom interjected as he stepped out to the porch. He wrapped his arms behind her waist, giving her a gently kiss on the top of her head. “How’s work, my pretty girl?” He looked back at Tuwaine and mouthed a thank you to him as he left the love birds alone.
Y/N turned around to face Tom, taking in his features and running her hands at the nape of his neck. “Busy, but what else is new? I’ve been missing you a whole lot”
“Me too, darling. Anyway, Im really hoping you can take a break from all this because I’ve got something special for you.”
“Oh no, babe. You know you didnt have to anything for me. Really Im fine..I-“
“I wanted to. In fact the boys wanted in on it too. So this is really from all of us, if you think about it.” Tom grabbed Y/N’s hand as he led her back in to house. “Come.”
As they both enetered the house hand in hand, Tom led Y/N into the kitchen, where the rest of the boys waited with diner burgers in hand and warm homemade chocolate chip cookies on the side of table. What seemed like a simple meal was a cure for any bad day..at least for Y/N it was. It represented a sense of home for her, while being far from Jersey. Even though she hadnt realized it, Tom and the boys knew she needed it. “Wow” Y/N breathed “I...I dont know what to say.”
“Dont say, just eat” Harrison laughed. “In all honesty this was Tom’s idea. We just wanted to make sure you had the support you need.”
“Yeah you deserve this, so please enjoy it.” Harry added. With that, everyone dug in and bonded over a family dinner, sharing laughs and stories. Tom leaned toward Y/N whispering in her ear, “I have a few more surprises after this.”
The next few surprises did not disappointment. He set up a nice warm bath for the two of them to relax and enjoy each others compny. A few subtle kisses, laughter, and silence was shared between the two. Y/N leaned back into Tom’s chest, feeling the water gently flow back and forth. Breathing in and out, she had forgotten how good this felt. Being close to Tom, was a different experience, one that no one could ever do justice. This was what she really needed.
After the bath, Tom led her into their shared bedroom. For a moment, Y/N stopped him as she pulled his head down to hers, giving him the kiss he rightfully deserved. Her lips crashed with his, his hands gently holding the sides of her tiny face. He picked her up as she wrapped her legs around his waist and situated themselves on the bed. Reluctantly, they both pulled away, catching their breath. Their foreheads touching and noses gently rubbing the others. “I love you. I love you more than you could possibly know.” Y/N whispered to him
“And I love you. I just want to give you the world because you deserve it all. My hardworking pretty girl.” Of course all good things must come to an end.
After a great well spent break was shared between Y/N and Tom, she was back on the work grind. Only this time she was working in their room as Tom was reading a script for his next upcoming project. The more Y/N coded, the sleepier she was getting. It onyl took a few minutes before she started leaning into Tom and her eyes started to flutter. Her breaths became slower and she was out like a light.
Tom turned to look at Y/N, smiling to see the sight of her finally at peace. He removed her glasses and set them by her table side. Tom made sure to clock her out of work abd checked to see if her work was saved. Just as he was about to turn off her laptop, another message popped up. “Great”, he muttered, rolling his eyes at the fact her team is still working at this hour. He couldnt help but read it though. Just how badly did they need her anyway?
We all know how hard you’re working and going above and beyond to get these projects out the door. For that, we thank you! On behalf of the company we’d like you all to take a day off on us!
Tom smiled, relieved that shell finally get some time for herself. Feeling triumphant, he shut off her laptop and set it aside. Crawling back into the bed and covering themselves under the blanket. His arms wrapped her waist once again. “Goodnight, my love. Im so proud of you.” he whispered.
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50 Gotham Quotes
Some of my favorite Gotham quotes. Many are perfect for our more villainous characters.
1 James Gordon: “Fear doesn’t need conquering. Fear tells you where the edge is.”
2 Jerome Valeska : “There’s nothing more contagious than laughter.”
3 Bruce Wayne: “I don’t want revenge. I want to understand how it all works.”
4 Carmine Falcone: “For the first time in a long time, I feel alive. I remember who I am. I remember why I’m here.”
5 Oswald Cobblepot : “Please don’t think too badly of me. We are what we are.”
6 Alfred Pennyworth: “Haven’t I told you to stop creeping up on people like that, it’s bloody rude!”
7 Selina Kyle : “It’s good you’re changing. Just don’t change too much.”
8 James Gordon : “I promise you, however dark and scary the world might be right now, there will be light. There will be light, NAME.”
9 Oswald Cobblepot: “Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.”
10 Leslie Thompkins : “We can’t change the past, but there’s a difference between moving on and letting go.”
11 Fish Mooney : “You have a little danger in your eye. I wonder what you plan to do with that.”
12 Fish Mooney: “We have one simple choice. We die here alone on our knees or we stand up, and we fight with our family.”
13 Theo Galavan: “Desperate times call for a strong measure.”
14 Theo Galavan: “To family. In the end, it’s all that matters.”
15 Bruce Wayne: “Bad dream.”
Alfred Pennyworth: “Oh. Was I in it?”
Bruce Wayne: “Not this time.”
16 Sarah Essen: “You don't bend, you'll get broke.”
17 Barbara Keane: “Aren’t all the best guys a little scary?”
18 Alfred Pennyworth: “Pick your battles. Don’t let them pick you.”
19 Fish Mooney: “Hope is a carrot easily dangled in front of the desperate.”
20 Alfred Pennyworth: “Taking a punch is just as important as throwing one.”
21 Jerome Valeska: “Everybody has to start somewhere.”
22 Fish Mooney: “NAME, you’re back. I’m starting to think you enjoy being hurt.”
23 Fish Mooney: “We’re family. We sink or swim together.”
24 Fish Mooney: “Family is built on trust, and that’s what we are. A family.”
25 Fish Mooney: “A lie with a heart of truth is a powerful thing.”
26 Fish Mooney: “My name is NAME, bitch. And you better tell me what the hell is going on.”
27 Selina Kyle: “The best liars always tell the truth.”
28 Selina Kyle: “Out there on the streets, it’s not enough to be strong. You gotta be mean. Gotta be ruthless.”
29 Carmine Falcone: “I never lose sleep over my enemies, Its my friends that keep me awake.”
30 James Gordon: “You coming?”
Harvey Bullock: “Let me say it in Spanish. No.”
31 Oswald Cobblepot: “You owe me a favour, NAME. You owe me!”
James Gordon: “Dammit.”
32 Bridgit Pike: “Why are you helping me?”
Selina Kyle: “Maybe you remind me of me. If I was a doofus.”
33 Jerome Valeska: “We all could go insane with just one bad day.”
34 Jerome Valeska: “To truly build something, you must first tear down what is already there.”
35 Edward Nygma: “A man with nothing that he loves … is a man who cannot be bargained. A man that cannot be betrayed. A man who answers to no one … but himself.”
36 Jeremiah Valeska: “ It’s the ones who are closest to you that you have to keep your eye on.”
37 Edward Nygma: “This is who I am. It was just finally admitting the truth to myself. Well, that and murdering some people.”
38 Edward Nygma: “The less you have, the more they’re worth. To friends.”
39 Jerome Valeska: “Good ol’ NAME. Always playing by the rules. That’s why I’ll outlive you. That’s why I’m loved, ’cause I don’t give a damn about the rules.”
40 Oswald Cobblepot: “When you know what a man loves, you know what can kill him.”
41 Edward Nygma: “The cupcake is sweet, the bullet is deadly. A beautiful woman’s a dangerous thing.”
42 Jerome Valeska: “That’s the spirit, boys. Think big, and kinky.”
43 Alfred Pennyworth: “There is no life, there is no love without pain.”
44 Edward Nygma: “The heart keeps its own time.”
45 Oswald Cobblepot: “Perhaps it’s not our friends but … our enemies that define us.”
46 Bruce Wayne: “I’m not afraid to die. Not if it means doing the right thing.”
47 Barbra Keane: “Your appearance can be a weapon, as powerful as any knife or gun.”
48 Bruce Wayne: “You’re either with me or you’re against me.”
49 James Gordon: “You think you know who I am. What I’m capable of. You have no idea.”
50 Harvey Bullock: “Don’t worry, discretion is my middle name.”
#gotham prompts#gotham quotes#bruce wayne#alfred pennyworth#oswald cobblepot#edward nygma#harvey bullock#james gordon#fish mooney#barbra keane#selena kyle#jerome valeska#writing prompts#dialogue prompts#drabble prompts#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell
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75 Siren Prompts
75 prompts perfect for your mermaid au.
1 Ted: “They know you're helping him/her, you know. They're looking for you.”
Ben: “I know.”
Ted: “Alright, go on. Be careful.”
Ben: “Thank you.”
2 Ben: “We don't know him/her! He/She could hurt him/her!”
Maddie: “I don't like it either, okay? Him/Her being with someone else. But we have to put our feelings aside.”
Ben: “You can do that?”
3 Xander: “Another weird night. Courtesy of the merpeople.”
4 Ryn: “He/She killed my people and it starts with love. Like NAME loves NAME.”
5 Ryn: “He/She lied to me. He/She should tell me about his/her family.”
Maddie: “He/She was afraid of losing you.”
6 Ryn: “In water we kill for food ... protection. NAME’s family kill because they are angry. Murder.”
Ben: “I am ashamed that I am related to someone who could do that.”
Ryn: “Yes. Shame.”
Ben: “I made a mistake! I should've told you.”
7 Ryn: “Why do humans do things like this?”
Ben: “Sometimes because they're afraid. Sometimes ... I don't know ... angry.”
8 Ryn: “These are our people. We stay.”
9 Ben: “NAME found out about my family ... what they did. He/She thinks that I was trying to hide it from him/her.”
Maddie: “Were you?”
Ben: “I don't know. Maybe.”
10 Ryn: “They are afraid?”
Ben: “They think that if humans knew, they would do something bad to them.”
11 Levi: “Maybe Ben and Ryn make baby.”
Ben: “That wouldn't help your species, though.”
12 Ryn: “We are many seasons without babies.”
Ben: “No one's gotten pregnant? How long?”
Ryn: “Very long.”
13 Nicole: “I'm on your side. I need you to remember that.”
14 Maddie: “NAME, what is this place?”
Ryn: “This is where NAME began.”
Ben: “You were born here?”
15 Xander: “Are you sure that this thing that's in your head ... it's not making you think that you have feelings for NAME? What if that's not real either? You have no idea what this thing could be doing to you.”
Maddie: “I had feelings for him/her before it happened.”
16 Maddie: “We're in love. The three of us!”
17 Nicole: “I never wanted to hurt anyone.”
18 Nicole: “I don't have to stick around anymore, but I am. For you.”
19 Ryn: “Military was bad to brother/sister, but good to NAME. “
Maddie: “For now. But we don't know what they want to do to you.”
20 Ryn: “In the water ... others in danger. He/She saved them, but he/she die.”
21 Xander: “Hey, good luck down there. Do your thing.”
22 Ryn: “We don't want this big fight. But we must, so we can go back home.”
23 Helen: “You don't have to stand there. If you're gonna be my night watchman, at least have a seat.”
24 Ryn: “NAME always with you.”
Maddie: “We/I love you.”
25 Dale: “Think. Think before you do anything.”
26 Dale: “So you killed him/her?”
Ryn: “Yes.”
Dale: “You saved my son’s/daughter's life. I'll never be able to thank you enough.”
27 Helen: “I know you don't understand me. No locks in the ocean, right?”
28 Ben: “You wanna stay involved? Okay. Tell them no. Make some noise, dad/mom. Do something.”
29 Helen: “Oh my God. You're beautiful.”
30 Helen: “They can't keep doing this. They're nocturnal. I'm not.”
31 Ryn: “He/She say NAME is human.”
32 Maddie: “I'm just glad I have this place. And the two of you.”
33 Ryn: “What do you think about?”
Maddie: “I think about NAME. And you.”
34 Helen: “Telling you wouldn't have worked. You have to feel it before you can believe.”
35 Maddie: “This is gonna take a miracle.”
Ben: “Well, lucky for us we've got duct tape.”
36 Susan: “Talk to me, please. Tell me what's going on. I want to help.”
37 Maddie: “NAME told us we couldn't stop the fight, but you tried anyway. Were you hearing it again? His/Her song? In your mind?”
38 Helen: “What the hell is going on?”
Ben: “Survival of the fittest.”
39 Xander: “I'm not the risk! They're the risk!”
40 Ben: “What if the way I feel about you has nothing to do with the song?”
41 Ben: “What if the way I feel about you has nothing to do with the song?”
42 Ryn: “In the ocean, we move forward. Always.”
43 Ryn: “He/She was leader. Now he/she must ask NAME for help.”
44 Xander: “I didn't get a chance to tell you. I'm sorry.”
45 Ryn: “He/She sang to you to escape from you, not because he/she loves you. He/She will not do it again.”
46 Ryn: “NAME tried to help us.”
Maddie: “I know, NAME. But he/she didn't, did he/she?”
47 Maddie: “What's going on?”
Helen: “It's a matriarchy. It seems NAME is now the dominant female.”
48 Maddie: “I'm going to stick with my dad/mom right now.”
Ben: “NAME ...”
Maddie: “I'll be back later. For NAME.”
49 Sheriff: “Those creatures, NAME, they can't be here.”
Maddie: “I know. They can learn and evolve like NAME did.”
Sheriff: “I don't want to have to choose a side, but if I do, this town comes first.”
50 Ryn: “It's okay. NAME is love.”
Donna: “Love.”
51 Ryn: “They killed us -- so many of us that the water was red with our blood.”
52 Ben: “NAME, tell me what's going on.”
Ryn: “Not here to take back. Here to kill.”
53 Ben: “You can't just go back. I need you here.”
54 Donna: “We take NAME back to his/her home.”
Helen: “I thought you only killed for survival, but now, aggression, plotting revenge. You're more human than I realized.”
Donna: “We are his/her family. He/She must come back.”
Helen: “What if he/she doesn't want to go with you? He/She seems very attached to his/her human friends.”
Donna: “Where. Is. NAME?”
55 Ryn: “Is NAME OK?”
Ben: “Yeah. NAME is good.”
56 Ben: “Will you sing to me again?”
57 Ryn: “I know I am part animal but I am part human.”
58 Maddie: “NAME was hurt, he/she came for us for help.”
59 Xander: “Where is my damn mermaid?”
60 Donna: “You like human.”
61 Ryn: “This man/woman, he/she hurt him/her.”
62 Ben: “I know what he/she did to you.”
63 Ryn: “Not safe on land. Not safe in water.”
64 Helen: “You can trust me because I am one of you.”
65 Helen: “I thought you might be by the water.”
66 Ryn: “In water we fight. I kill or you kill.”
67 Ben: “We would like to know more about you.”
68 Helen: “You don't know what you are dealing with.”
69 Maddie: “He/She almost killed you in the water.”
70 Maddie: “How do you subtly ask about a mermaid?”
71 Helen: “In their natural state in the water, they see you as prey. Their instinct is to kill. Humans never understood that.”
72 Ben: “What if there is a new predator out there? One that we haven't seen before.”
73 Chris: “Maybe it is some big cover up, but I am done running.”
74 Ben: “If your dad/mom finds out.”
Xander: “I'm calling the shots on this one!”
75 Xander: “It was an accident.”
#siren quotes#siren prompts#mermaid prompts#mermaid au writing prompts#writing prompts#drabble prompts#dialogue prompts#ryn fisher#ben pownall#maddie bishop#xander mcclure#helen hawkins#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell
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100 Psych Prompts
Shawn
1 “Just because you put syrup on something don't make it pancakes.”
2 “It's my third best quality, right behind awesomeness and humility.”
3 “I'm available for lunch.” “You're available to suck it.”
4 “What is genius? Can you bottle it? Is it something you would even want to bottle?”
5 “What are you doing?” “Trying to shed tears for NAME. They won’t come and I’m ashamed.”
6 “That's baking soda.” “Bacon soda? That's a genius idea, but I'm not sure the world is ready for a pork-flavored beverage.”
7 “How you like me now, NAME?! How you like me now?!”
8 “You got bologna on your face, son!”
9 “You can’t leave.” “You’re not even back yet.”
10 “C'mon man, you know that moment needed something ...”
11 “Do you think I’m a leach?”
12 “I'm thinking about taking on work as a manny/nanny.”
13 “But you’re adorable when you’re in denial ...”
14 “I am speaking with my maker!”
15 “NAME just made us all feel very awkward ...”
16 “Go in there and be someone else ...”
17 “How do you say "suck it" in English?” “You just did, NAME.”
18 “You might understand how a crazy person might find this to be upsetting.”
19 “Clearly this is embarrassing for both of us ...”
20 “He/She sang our song ...” “It's on now.”
21 “Am I really that predictable?”
22 “I am not a moron.” “Even if you were I would clean up your messes ...”
23 “How is it now that I am now being punished for being honest?”
24 “I will sell you a smile.” “Suck it, NAME.”
25 “I am not gonna give up on us, alright?”
Gus
26 “True love knows no bounds.”
27 “I’m having nightmares, I can’t sleep. It’s really, really bad.”
28 “Need you? Need you? What makes you think I need you, NAME?!”
29 “Everybody listen to NAME!”
30 “I am not going to stress over things that I can’t control.”
31 “He's/She’s still not ready to talk about it.”
32 “You said the meat and cheeses were not gonna touch, NAME.”
33 “Boning up is not a thing, NAME.”
34 “It's a valid question, NAME!”
35 “We are not talking about this EVER, NAME. You all can suck it.”
36 “Creepiest butt dial ever!”
37 “iPad NAME is a lot braver than real-life NAME.”
38 “Keep going and I'm gonna rip your heart out, and that's an organ you need.” “Actually, that's a muscle.” “Whatever.”
39 “Did you tell NAME about this?” “No, I did not. I most certainly did not.”
40 “NAME I have been watching reality tv and been training for a moment just like this one all my life. I am in it to win it.”
41 “I saw it. I knew it was coming. I was definitely getting my heart on.”
42 “You're not leaving! You're just making footstep sounds!”
43 “Make sure you water my plants thrice daily. But do not talk to them, or they will not stop, especially Jim.” “Jim is the fichus?” “Exactly.”
44 “We take our handheld entertainment very seriously.”
45 “Maybe we could hug it out later.”
46 “These Plums are God's candy.” “If God meant for those to be candy, why did he invent candy? Did you hear what I just said?”
47 [PERSON A] “Is this gonna get awkward again?” [PERSON B & C] “It already is.”
48 “He/She used to talk about you that way.”
49 “You went boneless, didn't you?”
50 “If you were knowledgeable of the most popular franchise in the history of film, perhaps you wouldn’t be experiencing such confusion.”
Lassiter
51 “Come on, let's hug it out.” “I would rather learn to play the harp.”
52 “I'd rather shower with a bear.”
53 “I’m not big on nude handshakes.”
54 [sarcastic] “Fantastic! The whole team is here!”
55 “You are very important to me, NAME. And I don't always do the best job telling you that.”
56 “Saddle up and let’s ride!”
57 “I am so screwed.”
58 “This scumbag is going down!”
59 “You two nimrods still have a lot of explaining to do.”
60 “I have one weakness in this life, and he/she has him/her.”
61 “Step to me and I whip out the enormous piece I have under this robe!”
62 “Guard him/her with your life. That's not hyperbole!”
63 “Your story, much like your lunchbox, smells a little fishy.”
64 “You two are so breaking up over this.”
65 “That is cheating right?” “Absolutely.”
66 “I am like a classic, I never go out of style.”
67 “Tell you something, If I wasn't in a serious and meaningful relationship, I would be doing some serious damage all in this hizzy ... am I saying that right? Hizzy?”
68 “Tell your boyfriend/girlfriend goodbye and let's get some pancakes.”
69 “You just can't stand me winning.”
70 “How hard did that guy hit you?”
71 “That is a very unusual necklace, and it shows off you clavicle quite well ...”
72 “You put some sunglasses on!”
73 “I am seeing a man/woman.” “Can you tell me his/her name? Or is it a secret?”
74 “If you don't treat NAME with the respect he/she deserves, or you hurt him/her in any way, I will discharge my pistol.” “You're saying you'll shoot me?” “Repeatedly.”
75 “Thanks for sharing, NAME. Wow, you really put the 'me' in team.”
Juliet
76 “You are on the hook until you make it so I don't have to lie for you anymore.”
77 “NAME our relationship is built on lies.” “... And laughter, and laser tag and love.”
78 “Honesty is everything to me Shawn. It's the only thing.”
79 “What do you think a NAME-NAME wedding would look like, NAME?”
80 “Friend, that's me, I in friend status ...” “Of course, what else would you be, Shawn?”
81 “So the next time you decide to put your life in danger, remember there is someone that loves you that is worried sick ...”
82 “You kiss him/her, you die.” “Duly noted.”
83 “NAME, please pretend you're a human.”
84 “What's your damage, NAME?”
85 “I am very fond of you.” “Me too.”
86 “NAME, NAME, I can see you.” “I know I'm in the dog house. “ “No, you're gonna have to work really hard to get into the dog house ... “Ok, so I'm in the yard, which is still an enclosed area ... [Pause] Unless I'm in the pound ... NAME, am I in the pound?!”
87 “But what really breaks my heart is that you won't be there for all the moments to come.”
88 “You pinched and bit a man?”
89 “Wow, you guys are actually devolving ... get back over here, now!”
90 “So why don't you let me take you to dinner?” “NAME, are you asking me out on a date?” “I am. [pause] A proper one.”
Henry
91 “Oh, please. I'm all about touching --respectfully.”
92 “NAME, I will choke you out!”
93 “Give me one good reason I shouldn't punch you in the face.” “Glass jaw, winning smile?”
94 “NAME, how long have you been obsessed with this man/woman.”
95 “It's so much bigger than mine.” “It's yours, kid.”
96 “What happened out there today?”
97 “I don't think that will be necessary.”
98 “That's a pretty lame movie of the week you're writing.”
99 “What kind of idiot drives down a public pathway?!”
100 “I don’t even wanna know what you think that means, NAME.”
#psych prompts#psych quotes#shawn spencer#burton guster#carlton lassiter#juliet o'hara#henry spencer#dialogue prompts#writing prompts#drabble prompts#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell
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107 The Good Place Prompts
Eleanor Shellstrop
1 “I just don't think the group thing is for me. I'm better when it's one-one-one and we're both looking at our phones and I don't know the other person and we don't talk.”
2 “The closest thing I could find to herbal tea was a root beer I had them throw in the microwave.”
3 “Whenever anyone tells me a story about their life I always imagine all the people as being super hot. Otherwise, I quickly lose interest. Do you not do that? You can do it for free.”
4 “I'm SO ready to learn, it's like my brain is HORNY!”
5 “What can you possibly say to us that will make up for your actions?” “Pobody's nerfect?”
6 “You don't seem like a ... super genius.”
7 “Ugh, of course your hugs are amazing.”
8 “Oh, so now I'm supposed to be nice and make friends and treat him:her with mutual respect?” “Yeah!” “That's exactly what he/she wants me to do, NAME, wake up!” “That's what everyone wants everyone to do.”
9 “Your friend sounds like he’s/she's one pickle short of a pickle party.”
10 “I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed.” “Oh, come on. Everyone knows that's worse.”
11 “I know it sounds crazy, but if it weren’t crazy they wouldn’t call it a ‘leap of faith.’ They would call it a ‘sit … of ... doubting.’”
12 “Buzz off, Bambadjan.”
13 “Where is everyone?” “Who knows? Maybe they finally figured out clam chowder is disgusting, 'cause it's basically a savory latte with bugs in it.”
14 “First of all, throwing sand is an excellent way to put out a vodka fire.” “Why would you even know that?!”
15 “No, NAME, I used to do that. Now I do selfless things without even thinking about it.”
16 “Why don't I ever listen to people when they talk about themselves? No, it's annoying, and I'm right not to.”
17 “Are you going to talk? Or just walk around like a nerd trying to get a personal best on his Fitbit?”
18 “I guess ‘try and enjoy this’ is a better plan than ‘have the anxiety sweats.’’
19 “I’ve only ever said ‘I love you’ to two men my entire life, Stone Cold Steve Austin and a guy in a dark club who I mistook for Stone Cold Steve Austin.”
20 “Is that some kind of nerd pick-up line? Because it’s only kind of working.”
21 “You know I’m trying to say ash-hole instead of ash-hole, right?”
22 “It’s suddenly very important that I get drunk.”
23 “Well fork you, too.”
24 “Holy mother-forking shirtballs.”
25 “‘You’re not better than me’ was my yearbook quote.”
Tahani Al-Jamal
26 “You guys came to say goodbye because you're my friends.” “Well, I suppose some part of me possibly has a sense of casual kinship with you, much as one might be fond of a street cat.”
27 “I would say I outdid myself, but I’m always this good. So I simply did myself.”
28 “NAME, you seem thoughtful. And that concerns me.”
29 “I, NAME, shall do my level best to make every event too much.”
30 “I just want to sit and stare at nothing, and silently scream for the rest of time.”
31 “I made a complete fool of myself tonight. I interrupted your big speech and badly stained my cargo pants, which, I have to admit, are quite comfortable. Oh, God, what’s happened to me? I’m praising off-the-rack separates!”
32 “Who else feels that NAME has ruined every moment of your existence since you arrived?”
33 “Right now I'm just a boy/girl, towering over a boy/girl, asking him/her to admit he/she loves me.”
34 “My whole life, whenever I encountered any obstacles, I would simply say, ‘I would like to speak to a manager.’ But in our relationship, there was no manager. There was no one who could fix this for me except me.”
Chidi Anagonye
35 “I’m just not a ‘new experience’ kind of guy. My comfort zone is basically like, that chair, and honestly? The arms are a little sharp.”
36 “Here’s an idea. What if we don’t worry about whatever comes next?”
37 “Principles aren’t principles when you pick and choose when you’re gonna follow them.”
38 “If this isn’t a test, then it’s something way worse: A choice! That we have to make!”
39 “I am absolutely paralyzed by decision-making.”
40 “I’m going to ... start crying.”
41 “I am pretty good at turning every place I go into my personal hell.”
42 “You know the sound that a fork makes in the garbage disposal? That’s the sound that my brain makes all the time.”
43 “Well, I’ve narrowed it down to two possibilities: yes and no.”
44 “There's an old Chinese proverb... ‘Lies are like tigers. They are bad.’””That's it?” “I guess it's more poetic in Mandarin.”
45 “I argue that we choose to be good because of our bonds with other people and our innate desire to treat them with dignity. Simply put, we are not in this alone."
46 “I am breaking up with you.” “Why?” “I can't ... It's complicated, but it's happening. Ya dumped!”
47 “I do have a stomachache. Why do I always have a stomachache?”
48 “You put the Peeps in the chili pot and eat them both up! You put the Peeps in the chili pot and add the M&Ms. You put the Peeps in the chili pot and it makes it taste bad.”
49 “Are you alright? You didn't sleep at all last night.” “I got a solid eight minutes. Not consecutively, but still. It's fine. You're not even that blurry.”
50 “We can be colleagues. Associates is pushing it. And by even having this conversation, you're becoming my confidante. I can't have that.”
51 “I am absolutely paralyzed by decision making and it is destroying my life.” “Yeah, I sort of got that when you couldn't choose a chair to sit on.” “Well, I didn't want to offend you in case you had a favorite.”
52 “This whole romantic situation is such a mess. I am vexed, NAME. Vexed.”
53 “I need to step outside ... for some air ... and I will not be back for many days.”
54 “I'm sorry, everyone, I just have some worries as well as some concerns that could potentially turn into outright fears. Ah, there they go, they're fears now.”
55 “When I'm really upset, concentrating on a table of contents helps me calm down. It's like a menu, but the food is words.”
56 “I have never been that certain about anything. I once even tried to rent socks. How did I say that that easily?”
57 “You broke the world. It's not a compliment!”
58 “This is fun. It's a fun party. There's no question about it, this is a fun ... situation. Hey! You guys are here! The fun continues, nay, increases!”
Michael
59 “If soulmates do exist, they’re not found. They’re made.”
60 “I’ll say this to you, my friend, with all the love in my heart and all the wisdom of the universe. Take it sleazy.”
61 “We have no plan. No one’s coming to save us. So ... I’m going to do it.”
62 “It’s a rare occurrence, like a double rainbow. Or like someone on the internet saying, You know what? You’ve convinced me I was wrong.”
63 “Lies are always more convincing when they’re closer to the truth.”
64 “Kissing is gross. You just mash your food holes together. It’s not for that.”
65 “Birth is a curse and existence is a prison.”
66 “Serious question: should we kill them?”
67 “Lonely Gal Margarita Mix for One.”
68 (Holding a plush Minion) “I won this ugly yellow toddler, which is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen.”
69 “Hello, everyone. Good to see you all here, mingling around with your various secrets. Who really knows which of you are who you say you are? No way to know unless I pull your skeletons out, right?"
70 “In the words of one of my actual friends: 'Ya basic'. It's a human insult. It's devastating. You're devastated right now."
71 “Where's the H? This keyboard doesn't have an H.”
72 “Dick Tracy called back on his watch phone and said you better "watch" out!”
73 “I got to ride a bike. I put a coin in a thing and got a gumball. And then someone came up to me and said, ‘hot enough for ya?’, and you know what I said? I said, ‘tell me about it!’” “Well I am glad that you got to chew a gumball.” “Oh, damn. I didn't even think to chew it. Missed opportunity, shoot.”
74 “I saw this place that was at once a Pizza Hut and a Taco Bell! I mean, oh! The mind reels! A Pizza Hut and a Taco Bell!”
75 “And what's the significance of the keychain?” “Nothing, I just like frogs. I'm a frog guy.”
76 “I won't let you down.” “I think you will. I think this entire project of yours is stupid and doomed to fail.”
77 “You know the way you feel when you see a chimpanzee and a baby tiger who have become friends? That's how you're going to feel every day.”
78 “You humans have so many emotions. You only need two: anger and confusion!”
79 “It makes sense, right? They're good so they're stupid and trusting.”
Jason Mendoza
80 “I have no idea what’s going on right now but everyone else is talking and I think I should too!”
81 “I can’t believe NAME betrayed us again, why is it always the ones you most expect?”
82 “I wasn’t a failed DJ. I was pre-successful.”
83 “Claustrophobic? Who would ever be afraid of Santa Clause?”
84 “If you’re a devil, how come you’re not wearing Prada?”
85 “I’m too young to die and too old to eat off the kids’ menu. What a stupid age I am.”
86 “Well, my year started about a year ago …”
87 “Dude! We can get mythical animals? Maybe I’ll get a penguin.” “Penguins are real.” “That’s the spirit, NAME. They’re real to me too.”
88 “When I say I'm meditating, I'm just trying to figure out what the fork is happening."
89 “You know, it doesn't matter if you know things. All that matters is what's in your heart."
90 “I'm ranking my favourite Fast and the Furious movies. You said you wanted to know who I am, and this is the best way to get to know me."
91 “He’s/She's my everything. He/She makes the bass drop in my heart.”
92 “Long story short, it was all a dream.”
Janet
93 “I think I might hate things now, too. So far, it’s genocide and leggings as pants.”
94 “NAME told me that instead of being sad, I should ‘go get it, girl.’ So I’m going to go get it, girl.” “Get what?” “Unclear. I’ll get everything, just to be safe.”
95 “In case you were wondering, I am, by definition, the best version of myself."
96 “Ooh, I've never had to walk before, this is fun! [Walks a few steps] Now I'm bored. Walking is dumb.”
97 “Oh, really? Is it an error to act unpredictably and behave in ways that run counter to how you were programmed to behave?”
Minor Miscellaneous Characters
98 “There is some good news. There’s some cake left!” – Neil from Accounting
99 “Well, I'm sure you're busy, you probably wouldn't want to talk to me. I get it, I wouldn't either. I'm as dull as a rock. Ugh, even that analogy was boring. I'm sorry, I'm so dull, and I'm ugly. I'm like a rock. Ugh, stupid Larry! Stop talking about rocks!” — Larry Hemsworth
100 “Oh, and you should smile more. You'll get bigger tips.” — Trevor
101 “Later days, dingus.” — Trevor
102 “Hold that thought. Is it OK if I go work out? I love working out. I gotta stay jacked. It's who I am.” — Chris Baker
103 “This is exhausting. I just want to go back to my container of goo and go to sleep.” — Shawn
104 “So, what's up, what's your deal? Are you single? What's going on?” — Trevor
105 “What up, ding dongs?” — Bad Janet
106 “Hello, imbeciles.” — Shawn
107 “So, we'll just roll on out, and you can get back to putting rainbows up your butt or whatever you do here.” — Trevor
#the good place quotes#the good place prompts#eleanor shellstrop#chidi anagonye#tahani al jamil#jason mendoza#writing prompts#drabble prompts#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell#dialogue prompts
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60 Spongebob Squarepants Prompts
This is a very special request for @burnsoslow boys. And now is time for me to admit that I hate this show so I hope I did a good job picking quotes. But really some are funny.
1 “Now that we’re men, we have facial hair.” “Now that we’re men I changed my underwear.” — Spongebob and Patrick
2 “What does claustrophobic mean?” “It means he’s afraid of Santa Clause.” — Spongebob and Patrick
3 “You don’t need a license to drive a sandwich.” — Spongebob
4 “Are you NAME now? … That’s okay take your time.” — Patrick Star
5 “I’ll have you know that I stubbed by toe last week and only cried for 20 minutes.” — Spongebob
6 “NAME, you’re a genius!” “Yeah, I get called that a lot.” “What? A genius?” “No, NAME.” — Spongebob Squarepants and Patrick Star
7 “Firmly grasp it in your hand.” — Patrick Star
8 “guess what day today is?” “Annoy NAME day?” “no silly! thats on the 15!” — Spongebob and Patrick
9 “Dumb people are always blissfully unaware of how dumb they really are …” [drools] —Patrick Star
10 “NAME, your ceiling is talking to me.” — Patrick Star
11 [with candy on his mouth] “All right! Which one of you flatfoots stole my lollypop?” [spongebob, the cops, and patrick laugh] “I mean it!” — Patrick Star
12 “Quick, NAME, without thinking: if you could have anything right now, what would it be?” “Um ... more time for thinking.” — Spongebob and Patrick
13 “What do you usually do when I’m gone” “waiting for you to come back.” — Spongebob & Patrick
14 “Well, it may be stupid, but it’s also dumb.” — Patrick
15 “Well, it’s no secret that the best thing about a secret is secretly telling someone your secret, thereby adding another secret to their secret collection of secrets, secretly.” — Spongebob
16 “NAME ... I used your clarinet to unclog my toilet!” — SpongeBob
17 [thinking] I don’t need it. I don’t need it. I definitely don’t need it. I don’t need it. I don’t need it. I don’t need it. I don’t need it. [shouts] “I… need… it!” — SpongeBob
18 “Who’s ready?” “I’m ready!” “Who’s ready?” “I’m ready!” “Who’s ready?” *I’m ready!* — Spongebob & Patrick
19 “NAME is the only guy I know who can have fun with a jellyfish … [shouting] for 12 hours!” — Squidward
20 “Now, who wants to save the world?” “I do!” “I do!” “I do!” “I don’t.” — SpongeBob SquarePants
21 [in a mattress store] “Wow, look at all these mattresses! How many do you think here are?” [looks around the store] “10.” “Cool.” — Spongebob & Patrick
22 “Are they laughing at us?” “No, NAME. They’re laughing next to us.” — Spongebob & Patrick
23 “You never really know the true value of a moment, until it becomes a memory.” — SpongeBob
24 “Oh well, I guess I’m not wearing any pants today!” — SpongeBob
25 “We’re not doing so well, NAME. We need a new approach, a new tactic.” “Umm, I got it. Let’s get naked!” — Spongebob & Patrick
26 “Knowledge cannot replace friendship. I’d rather be an idiot than lose you.” — Patrick to Spongebob
27 “Careful, NAME; Careful NAME. NAME careful. Careful NAME!” “NAME.” “Yeah?” “It’s already open.” “Oh.” — Patrick
28 “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime.” [locks SpongeBob and Patrick in jail cell and opens it again after a second] “Okay, time’s up. Now get out!” “But … we stole a balloon!” “Yeah, on free balloon day!” — Police & Spongebob
29 “What’s better than serving up smiles” “being dead or anything else.” — Spongebob & Squidward
30 “If I were to die right now in a fiery explosion due to carelessness of a friend ... Then it would just be alright.” — Spongebob
31 “Good people don’t rip other people’s arms off.” — Spongebob
32 “Wow, NAME, I didn’t know you spoke bird.” “No, NAME, that’s Italian.” — Spongebob & Patrick
33 “Isn’t this great NAME? It’s just the 3 of us. You, me, and this brick wall you built between us.” — SpongeBob SquarePants
34 “We shall never deny a guest even the most ridiculous request.” — Mr. Krabs
35 “That hat makes you look like a girl.” “Am I a pretty girl?!” — Mr. Krabs & SpongeBob
36 “A five letter word for happiness … money.” — Mr. Krabs
37 “NAME, I don't think Wumbo is a real word." "Come on. You know, I wumbo, you wumbo, he/she/me wumbo. Wombology, the study of wumbo! It's first grade NAME!" — Spongebob & Patrick
38 “No one can change a person, but someone can be a reason for that person to change.” – Spongebob
39 “F is for fire that burns down the whole town, U is for Uranium…bombs! N is for no survivors!" — Plankton
40 “The best time to wear a striped sweater …is all the time."
41 “Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died … the end."
42 “Can I be excused for the rest of my life?"
43 “Can I get some extra salt?" “We're all out." “Could you check?" “... No."
44 “It took three days to make that potato salad … three days!!!"
45 “You just CAN'T WAIT for me to die, can you?"
46 “Now he's gonna kick my butt!"
47 "This is not your average, everyday darkness. This is ... ADVANCED darkness."
48 “Too bad NAME isn't here to enjoy NAME not being here." — Squidward
49 “Remember, licking doorknobs is illegal on other planets."
50 “I'm not just ready, I'm ready Freddy!" “It's NAME …"
51 “NAME, don't you have to be stupid somewhere else?" “Not until four."
52 “Who are you people?!"
53 “Are you NAME now? ... That's okay, take your time."
54 “HAHAHAHA THAT GUY GOT HIT IN THE HEAD WITH A COCONUT HAHAHA."
55 “Too bad that didn't kill me."
56 “Bye NAME 1! Bye NAME 2! Bye NAME 1!” “You said bye to NAME 1 twice.” [grins huge, pauses, dreamily] “I liiiike NAME 1.” — Spongebob & Patrick
57 “NAME, bus is here! NAME!” [tries to run up the road] “Ahh! Ahhh! Ahhhh!” — Patrick & Spongebob
58 “If you believe in yourself and with a tiny pinch of magic, all your dreams can come true.” – Spongebob
59 “The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.” – Patrick Star
60 “It’s not always what you say that matters, sometimes it’s what you don’t say.” – Mr. Krabs
#spongebob squarepants quotes#spongebob squarepants prompts#drabble prompts#dialogue prompts#writing prompts#spongebob squarepants#squidward#patrick star#mr krabs#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell
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100 Boy Meets World Prompts
Cory
1 “And I just want to ask one thing: What's this?” “No, NAME, we were just --“ “Undapants!”
2 “They want you to take the rolls!”
3 “Please pay at the register, honey. And tipping is not a city in China.”
4 “NAME, you're trying to seduce me.”
5 “No, I don't get hit by a bus.” “Why not?” “Because I use the crosswalks, I memorize the bus schedules, and if I've got a husband/wife like NAME, I ain't leavin' the house.”
6 “NAME, just face it, you're afraid to make a commitment.” “I'm not afraid to make a commit -- I've been with NAME for fifteen years!” “Ah, they've been good years.”
7 “Wait, is this you or NAME talking?” “He/She decided we're one person.”
8 “This is raw, hot, unfiltered passion, and that kiss opened the gates.” “There are no gates.” “Oh, there's gates.”
9 “You were one of those kids that enjoy getting spanked, weren't you?” “I always deserved it.”
10 “But I've never failed before.” “There's a first time for everything.” “That argument doesn't get you anywhere with him/her.”
11 “You're not my father/mother, NAME.” “If I were your father/mother, I'd spank you, NAME. Because that's what you deserve. A big spanking! Now take down your pants.
12 “How could you possibly get into this much trouble in one day?” “It didn't take me the whole day.”
13 “It's us against him/her. Living on the edge, babe.” “I like when you call me babe.”
14 “Maybe I'm dreaming. Pinch me! ... Not on the butt.” “Sorry, it was just right there.”
15 “Gee, NAME, I'm looking around the room trying to see if anyone asked your opinion. I don't see anyone. Is anyone? No?”
16 “Did you hear how I referred to myself in the third person for emphasis?” “I thought that was a nice touch.” “NAME did too.”
17 “Finally someone understands my particular genuis.”
18 “First of all, there is a Whipped Magazine. I didn't subscribe; somehow they found me.”
19 “You know, you're a very sexy boy/girl, NAME.” “Really? I'm a sexy boy/girl. Thanks. I can't wait to tell NAME.”
20 “I'm in! Those idiots let me in.”
21 “Well I am shocked and dismayed.” “Well now you can't be both. You be shocked, I'll be dismayed.”
22 “Wear something of mine. What do you want, a jacket or a hat?” “A jacket. I'm very prone to hat head. Sometimes I get it without even wearing a hat.”
23 “So how was your weekend?” “Ah, one of the all time greats. I slept in, I watched TV, I played video games. And Sunday I took it easy.”
24 “I'm supposed to see other people. You're supposed to wait until I die.”
25 “This is so great. I wish NAME was here.”
Shawn
26 “Use a mirror, babe.”
27 “You know, NAME, NAME said something interesting before that got me thinking.” “Wait a minute. NAME got you thinking?” “He/She seemed well rested.”
28 “You listened to NAME.” “Oh my God, I listened to NAME.”
29 “I mean, NAME, you're much cooler than I am. At least I thought you were.” “Trust me, I am.”
30 “Hey, if I had things my way, NAME would walk in the day after the honeymoon and have the whole thing annulled.”
31 “You know, I'd give up on them but I don't think they'd notice.” “What?”
32 “He’s/She's your ex. Let me spell that for you, X.”
33 “Please get out and don't ever come back.”
34 “Yeah, so it's like you're a couple and we're a couple, and we're exactly the same except that --“ “You're married and we're happy.”
35 “Well what kind of stupid thing was it for you to care whether I put you back together again? What are you, Humpty Dumpty?”
36 “I hate myself.” “You're not alone.”
37 “NAME, his/her lover.” “Oh, very tasteful honey. Did you hear that, NAME?” “NAME, his/her lover.” “Oh, shut up Yoko.”
38 “You're a disgrace to the entire back row.”
39 “You don't think I'm a geek?” “Of course not.” “You think I'm cool?” “Of course not.”
40 “You're thinking too much. Do what I do, don't think.”
41 “You sure that's three cheeses? Because I only see two. Where's the Gouda, pal?”
42 “Don't move. Maybe he/she doesn't see us.
43 “Oh, man, I gotta do something now. Think.” “You gotta think, NAME.” “Ow.” “Thinking cramp?” “Yeah.” “I get those, too.”
44 “Look, NAME, I've been doing some thinking. Ow!”
45 “We have to come up with a plan.” “You know that's so crazy it just may work.” “What may work?” “The plan.” “I didn't tell you what it was.” “That way they can't get it out of me.” “Get what out of you?” “Nice try.”
Topanga
46 “We've waited for this moment all our lives. What are you thinking?” “I can't believe NAME’s not here.” “I love you too.”
47 “NAME!” “Oh, no.” “Oh, don't you run away from me, you old goat.”
48 “NAME. My dear little butt-head. May I call you butt-head?” “Sure.”
49 “I don't want to offend any one and my family's feelings are the most important thing to me. But if she thought I was getting married in that freaking monstrosity, she must have been hitting the sauce.”
50 “Have you looked at him/her?” “Okay, so he’s/she's pretty, he’s/she's tall, he/she drives a new red convertible. Oh heck, I'd go out with him/her.”
51 “NAME, you transparent moron. If you sigh one more time, I'm going to give you something to sigh about.”
52 “You know I could take you.” “You don't want to dance with me, boy/girl.” “You don't see me running, do you?” “Bring it on, NAME.” “It's on.”
53 “That's it. That's it, I've had it! I don't want to put the Sweet & Lo in my purse.”
Eric
54 “Hey, little bro/sis. Life's tough, get a helmet.”
55 “So I said to myself, NOT THEIR NAME --“ “NOT THEIR NAME?” “That's what I call myself.”
56 “I'll do it. I'm the oldest.” “Actually, I'm the oldest.” “Yeah, but I've lived the longest.”
57 “I don't know what's going to happen to me. But I know I'm gonna be a good person who cares about people. And I blame you for that.”
58 “I sort of thought you guys would keep my room the way it is.” “Actually, NICKNAME, for that I think you have to be unexpectedly killed by a truck or something.”
59 “What are you going to do when your hair grows back?” “It's not going to grow back. I got my receipt!”
60 “I'm dead.” “I'm dead.” “I'll get as sick as you can get without actually dying.”
61 “NAME, one word: You're with me.”
62 “NAME, I think he’s/she's a witch. And not a good witch like Glinda, a bad witch like with the monkeys.”
63 “NAME, what are you doing to me? We had a deal. You and FRIEND are so perfect for each other you should be married!” “I'm not ready.”
64 “Oh, look at that. You wobble like a weeble!”
65 “Don't you see what you're going through? This is your middle east crisis.” “Middle age crisis.”
66 “Of all the nights to fight, I mean Halloween, this is the one holiday that's supposed to bring loved ones together.”
67 “How can I let it go when it haunts my very thought?”
68 “By the way, that last paper you wrote, I couldn't stop thinking about it.” “That's because it was smut! ‘My lips quivered.’ -- it was filth. It was screamy filth.”
69 “You can't do that, NAME.” “Why are you calling me NAME?” “Because that's your human name.”
70 “Stay out of this, NAME, it's a one man/woman mission. ... Will you help me?”
Mr. Feeny
71 “Don't you mean ‘do well’?” “No, I mean do good.”
72 “You are the worst babysitter that ever lived.” “And your children are the spawn of Satan.”
73 “I was expecting you. Today, tomorrow, yesterday. It was only a matter of time.”
74 “How are we supposed to get home?” “Wait 'til it's dark. Then run, very quickly.”
75 “You're still moving away? Ah, for the love of Mike, stop with the mind games, man.” “You know this is the reason I can't sell my house.”
76 “I know my man/woman.” “It's like we have one brain.” “Yes, well. That's too easy.”
77 “Ho, ho. Is that the stupid idea train coming 'round the bend?”
78 “Oh, I think you're much more stupid than you give yourselves credit for.”
79 “Well, since you're not set on a name for the baby, I, myself, have always been partial to THEIR NAME.”
80 “I'm not responsible for Dream THEIR NAME!”
81 “For years I've seen you give advice to everybody, but never me. Why is that?!” “You don't ask.”
82 “The guy on our couch eating our beer nuts.” “Mmm, nutty.”
83 “Wait a minute. Maybe we should all just think for a second.” “No, NAME and I tried that. It doesn't work.”
Jack
84 “You don't know what it's like to live here, man. You don't.” “Why do you stay?” “Because ... he’s/she's my friend. Because I like him/her. And no matter what crazy things he/she says or does, I still like him/her. God help me I still like him/her.”
85 “You know, NAME, I'm having trouble opening this jar.” “That's because it's a can.”
86 “I can't be poor. I'm too good looking to be poor.”
87 “I would never pay for that shirt.”
88 “He's/She’s too passive. He/She needs to voice his/her opinions more.” “Ooh, NAME, what do you think about that?” “I don't know.”
Angela
89 “You guys are our closest friends, but we are sick and tired of you!”
90 “Because I'd rather give him/her attention for acting normal.” “Oh, honey. We know that's never going to happen.”
91 “Let me ask you this, in all the time you were with NAME, did he ever call out the name S/O NAME?” “No, but he called out the name PERSON ANAME.” “In what context?”
92 “No, I was just a little surprised seeing you here, eating my food, which is mine.” — Rachel
Alan
93 “It's quarter after three. Only creeps and wierdos are up now.” [person c enters]
94 “Anything happens to NAME, I'll kill you.” “You like him/her better than me.” [person a nods]
95 “I have an incomplete future.” “Of course you have an incomplete future. The future's always incomplete. When it's complete, people tend to call it the past.”
96 “You chose FRIEND over your own flesh and blood? You're dead to me.”
Amy
97 “I don't like it when you call him/her an idiot, NAME.” “I didn't call him/her anything.” “Oh, well I guess I must have thought it in my head.”
98 “NAME, we used you as a decoy. We knew you'd be stupid so we used it against you.”
99 “What happened? I used to be good.” “NAME, I say this with love and respect. You were never good.”
100 “We're just asking you to get us off the hook.” “No. This is your hook, you're going to hang there like the worms you are.”
#boy meets world prompts#boy meets world quotes#cory matthews#shawn hunter#eric mattews#topanga lawrence#george feeny#writing prompts#drabble prompts#dialogue prompts#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell#i love the feeny call#fee hee hee hee heenay
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125 Golden Girls Prompts
This time I have some hilarious prompts from some hilarious women. These help keep me sane, send in prompts or request a specific show. Long as hell, breaking at 15.
1 “Go to sleep, sweetheart. Pray for brains.” – Dorothy
2 “Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping.” -Blanche
3 “They were all buying T-shirts, you know, the ones that say, ‘Today is the first day of the end of your life.’” — Dorothy
4 “People waste their time pondering whether a glass is half empty or half full. Me, I just drink whatever’s in the glass.” – Sophia
5 “Nobody ever believes me when I’m telling the truth. I guess it’s the curse of being a devastatingly beautiful woman.” – Blanche
6 “No! No, I will not have a nice day!” -Dorothy
7 “Excuse me NAME, have I given any indication at all that I care?” – Sophia
8 “No one in my family has ever seen a psychiatrist ... except of course, when they were institutionalized!” – Blanche
9 “Isn’t it amazing how I can feel so bad, and still look so good?” -Blanche
10 “Condoms, NAME! Condoms, condoms, condoms!” – Dorothy
11 “It’s like life is a giant weenie roast, and I’m the biggest weenie!” – Rose
12 “He’s/She’s really a very sweet man/woman. He/She just doesn’t like to show it.” — Dorothy
13 “I eat raw cookie dough. And occasionally, I run through the sprinklers and don’t wear a bathing cap. And at Christmas, I’ve been known to put away more than one eggnog.” – Rose
14 “I could get herpes listening to this story!” – Dorothy
15 “I’ve been having a good time, and there wasn’t even a man/woman in the room.” -Blanche
16 “Why don’t I just wear a sign, ‘too ugly to live’?” – Dorothy
17 “I though I was gonna die. I swear I have never felt such agony. I saw my entire life flash before my eyes and I thought, ‘What a shame if I die now, I’m too young…and I’m wearing the wrong underwear.’” — Blanche
18 “You’ll have to excuse NAME. HE/She suffered a slight stroke a few years ago which rendered him/her totally annoying.” – Dorothy
19 “Eat dirt and die, trash.” – Blanche
20 “[to NAME] You’re a furry little gnome and we feed you too much.” – Dorothy
21 When I was a child, I used to get overexcited and pet the cat too much.” – Rose
22 “I feel that you have backed me into a corner, and when I am backed into a corner, I come out fightin’ like a wildcat. Unless I’ve had too much to drink, in which case I slide down the wall and make mad passionate love on the carpet.” – Blanche
23 “NAME, you’re one chromosome away from being a potato.” – Dorothy
24 “If this sauce was a person, I’d get naked and make love to it.” – Sophia
25 “I hate to admit it but he/she melts my Haagen-Dazs.” – Rose
26 “Want a glass of water to wash down your foot?” – Sophia
27 “Like I’m the only person who ever mixed a margarita in a sailor’s mouth?” – Blanche
28 “I feel like crawling under the covers and eating a box of Velveeta.” – Rose
29 “When I say jump, you say ‘on who?'” – Blanche
30 “I’m jumpier than a virgin at a prison rodeo.” – Blanche
31 “How come whenever my ship comes in it’s leaking?” – Dorothy
32 “Tell me the truth: do these glasses make me look stupid?” – Rose
33 “If I had that money I could have moved into a swinging condo instead of living with—I better not say anything until I’ve had my coffee [sips coffee]—a slut and a moron!” – Dorothy
34 “Go hug a landmine!” – Dorothy
35 “Fasten your seatbelt, slut puppy. This ain’t gonna be no cakewalk!” – Sophia
36 “NAME? Hubba hubba zing zing, baby, he’s /she’s got everything.” – Rose
37 “I could vomit just looking at you!” – Dorothy
38 “There is a fine line between having a good time and being a wanton slut. I know. My toe has been on that line.” – Blanche
39 “It’s like you people don’t pay any attention to me whatsoever.” – Rose
40 “Why do blessings wear disguises? If I were a blessing, I’d run around naked.” – Sophia
41 “I hate Jell-O. If God wanted peaches suspended in midair, he would have filled them with helium.” – Sophia
42 “Oh, don’t give up, NAME. If the ancient Egyptians could move 20-ton stone blocks to build the pyramids, we can move a toilet.” – Rose
43 “NAME, honey… have you been washing the fruit off before you eat it?” – Dorothy
44 “Tell me, is it possible to love two men/women/people at the same time.” “Set the scene, have we been drinking?” — Rose & Blanche
45 “NAME, what are you listening to?” “A relaxation tape. The rain is supposed to relax me.” “Is it working?” “Not really. I keep worrying that I left my car windows down.” — Dorothy & Rose
46 “NAME, I have a feeling you’re lying.” “NAME, be positive.” “Okay, I’m positive you’re lying.” — Dorothy & Rose
47 “You are undoubtedly the meanest, sickest person I’ve ever met! Not to mention the most unattractive.” — Blanche
48 “Where are you going?” “To either get ice cream or commit a felony. I’ll decide in the car.” — Rose & Dorothy
49 “Let me tell you a story. Picture it, PLACE …” —Sophia
50 “NAME, wake up. My husband/wife/partner will be home any minute.” — Dorothy
51 “I’m NAME and I know it isn’t pertinent at the moment, but I’m double jointed.” — Blanche
52 “He’s/She's really a very sweet man/woman. He/She just doesn't like to show it.” — Dorothy
53 “You know, sometimes when people are under pressure, they sleep to escape.” — Rose
54 “Have you noticed that NAME has been acting peculiar?” “Yes, NAME, from the first day that I met him/her!” — Blanche & Dorothy
55 “Oh, NAME, how do you feel about performing in front of a video camera?” “I think it's okay as long as you've already had at least three dates.” — Rose & Blanche
56 “I never grew a beard!” “You never grew brains, either!” — Rose & Sophia
57 “It wasn't a rat! It was a cute little mouse.” “NAME, it doesn't wear white gloves and work at Disneyland! We're talking about a rodent!” — Rose & Dorothy
58 “My whole life is an open book.” “Your whole life is an open shirt/blouse!” — Blanche & Sophia
59 “Oh, you don't have to worry about me, honey. I never get sick. I take very good care of myself. I treat my body like a temple.” “Yeah, open to everyone, day or night.” — Blanche & Sophia
60 “Oh, NAME. Can I make a little suggestion when you go for your makeover?” “Sure. What is it?” “Don't expect a miracle.” — Sophia & Dorothy
61 “Why am I even discussing this with you?” “Beats the hell out of me!” — Dorothy & Sophia
62 “Well, what do you know? NAME has a past!” “That's right! But unlike yours, I didn't need penicillin to get through it.” — Blanche & Sophia
63 “I'm going to have to meet men/women lying down.” “I thought you did.” — Blanche & Sophia
64 “Here we are in the middle of a crisis and there’s no cheesecake.” — Blanche
65 “Can I ask a dumb question?” “Better than anyone I know.” — Rose & Dorothy
66 “NAME, ‘disdam’ is not a word. You made it up.” “It’s a word.” “Fine. Use it in a sentence.” “You’re no good at disdam game.” — Dorothy & Sophia
67 “He’s/She’s undressing me with his/her eyes.” “Do you wanna move tables?” “Not yet, he’s/she’s only half done.” — Blanche & Rose
68 “You know, there is nothing worse than being wide awake and scared and by yourself!” “Oh yea there is: being wide awake and scared and by yourself without a double-fudge chocolate cheesecake in the freezer.” — Dorothy & Rose
69 “You know what would go so good on this cheesecake is those chocolate sprinkles.” “We finished those an hour ago.” “We could crush some Oreos on top.” “We ran out of those two hours ago.” “How about some whipped cream?” “Mmm!” — Dorothy & Rose
70 “You bought a chocolate cheesecake?” “Just for an emergency.” — Dorothy & Rose
71 “I just need some cucumbers to put on my eyes. It’s very good. It reduces puffiness.” “Does it work on thighs?” — Blanche & Rose
72 “I have a date.” “With a man/woman?” “No, NAME. With a Venus fly trap.” — Dorothy & Blanche
73 “Do you know what your trouble is?” “Of course not.” — Dorothy & Blanche
74 “I think there’s a connection between your brain and wallpaper paste.” — Sophia
75 ““Forgive me, NAME, but I haven’t had sex in AMOUNT OF TIME and it’s starting to get on my nerves.” – Sophia
76 “Do you know what I hate doing most after a big party?” “Trying to find your underwear in the big pile?” — Blanche & Rose
77 “I've never been so humiliated in my life.” “What about the time you lost the key to your handcuffs and had to go with that guy/girl on his/her mail route?” — Blanche & Dorothy
78 “You are not gonna believe this. NAME, just called me.” “I didn't think the two of you were speaking.” “Well, we're not.” “Then how'd you know it was him/her on the other end of the line?” “NAME, you're bringing down the curve for the whole country.” — Blanche, Dorothy & Rose
79 “Oh, my goodness. Look what I found. Double-fudge cookies. I thought we agreed not to keep cookies in the house.” “Right, after this last box.” “You're not going to eat them, are you?” “No, NAME. We're going to go to some dumb country and try to use them as money.” — Rose, Blanche & Dorothy
80 “I can't believe you said that! Oh, if I weren't a lady I'd deck you.” “You try and I'll have you on your back so fast you'll think you're out on a date.” — Blanche & Dorothy
81 [NAME running after a dog] “Ha! Would you look at that: man's best friend, chasing man's best friend!” — Dorothy
82 “I won't stand for this!“[gets up and starts to walk out] “Take it, NAME!” “But I bet you'll lie down for it.” — Blanche, Sophia & Dorothy
83 “NAME, you should make us eat dirt, make us grovel, give us the silent treatment...” “NAME, if you give us the silent treatment, I will eat dirt.” — Rose & Dorothy
84 “Cooking, NAME?” “No, NAME, I'm developing pictures for the Magellan Space Program.” — Rose & Dorothy
85 “Do we have any orange juice left?” [person two pours the rest in their glass] “No, we’re all out.” — Rose & Dorothy
86 “Go hug a landmine.” — Dorothy
87 “Now, what’s wrong?” “I lost it, NAME!” “You never had it, NAME.” — Dorothy & Stanley
88 “You knew I wanted to spend tonight alone.” — Rose
89 “Darn it. I gotta kiss somebody at midnight.” — Blanche
90 “Pizza, dammit! Get pizza!” — Dorothy
91 “What the hell goes on at night in this house?!” — Dorothy
92 “Just drives you nuts, doesn’t it, NAME?” — Rose
93 “Can you believe that backstabbing slut?” — Rose
94 “I’m here if you wanna pick my brain.” “NAME, I think we should leave it alone and let it heal.” — Rose & Dorothy
95 “And the world heaves a collective sigh of relief.” — Sophia
96 "Must you always be so cheerful, you empty headed Mary Poppins knockoff?'—Blanche
97 "What? Are you out of what is left of your mind?!"—Blanche
98 “All I do is listen to your sexual problems. How about my sexual problems?” — Sophia
99 “Blow it out your ditty bag.” — Sophia
100 “Your heart's in the right place, but I don't know where the hell your brain is." — Sophia
101 “Think about it. You live alone. No one likes you." — Sophia
102 “You're moving. Too bad. This would be touching if I liked you more." — Sophia
103 “Go ahead. Stand up and say it. My name is NAME, and I am an idiot." — Sophia
104 “You're here because the rhythm method was very popular in the [insert decade of birth]." — Sophia
105 “Get to the part where they steal the brain out of the dead body and sew it into your head." — Sophia
106 "Exactly how close to the television are you sitting when you're watching TV SHOW.” — Sophia
107 “Boom! You've got a social life." — Sophia
108 “You drink out of a brown paper bag and suddenly everybody’s your friend.” — Sophia
109 “Remember NAME, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” “I think I crossed that line when I got a date!” — Dorothy & Sophia
110 “If you can’t count on family, who the hell can you count on?” — Sophia
111 “In this life, that’s all we have, is hope.” — Sophia
112 “Here’s a newsflash, witches can fly.” — Sophia
113 “It’s great bringing two idiots closer together.” — Sophia
114 “NAME, a man/woman called for you while you were out.” “Finally, now we can break out that bottle of champagne we’ve been saving.” — Rose & Sophia
115 “Gee, with only three hours sleep, I can be just as bitchy as you.” — Rose
116 “Gee, Sophia! You’re awfully cranky today.” — Rose
117 “The doctor says it’s the first time he’s ever been called because a baby was sleeping in the day. And then I think he called me an idiot.” — Rose
118 [astonished] “You paying for something?” “What are you saying, I'm cheap?” “Well, of course he’s/she's saying you're cheap. You're the only man I know who owns a time-share dog!” — Rose, Stanley & Dorothy
119 “Hey, what is this? You're talking about me like I'm an animal. [sniffing NAME] You've been with a man, haven't you?” — Sophia
120 “I do love the rain so. It reminds me of my first kiss.” “Ah, your first kiss was in the rain?” “No, it was in the shower.” — Blanche & Dorothy
121 “You know, I've been thinking ...” “Oh, that would explain the beads of sweat.” — Rose & Blanche
122 “God, I hate morning people.” — Blanche
123 “He’s/She’s a lewd, horny, oversexed beast with five hands.” “You don’t have to build him/her up to me, honey. I like him/her just fine already.” — Rose & Blanche
124 “You ... you ... you rude person!” “Go easy on him/her, NAME.” — Rose & Dorothy
125 “This would be touching if I liked you more.” — Sophia
#golden girls prompts#golden girls quotes#dialogue prompts#writing prompts#drabble prompts#sophia petrillo#dorothy zbornak#rose nylund#blanche devereaux#long post#read more#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy
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100 Buffy Prompts
I had a lot of fun compiling this list. I was cracking up more than once and now I want to binge Buffy. If there is a show you want let me know because these seriously help me shut of my brain during this covid hell.
1 “NAME, your mouth is open, sound is coming from it. This is never good.” – Buffy Summers
2 “I just want to be alone and quite in a room with a chair and a fireplace and a tea cozy. I don’t even know what a tea cozy is, but I want one.” – Buffy Summers
3 "They were supposed to be my light at the end of the tunnel. I guess they were a train.” – Buffy Summers
4 “I don’t know what’s coming next. But I do know it’s gonna be just like this – hard, painful. But in the end, it’s gonna be us. If we all do our parts, believe it, we’ll be the one’s left standing.” – Buffy Summers
5 “I don’t handle rejection well. Funny, considering all the practice I’ve had, huh?” – Xander Harris
6 "Just because you’re better than us doesn’t mean you can be all superior.” – Xander Harris
7 “I’m leaning towards blind panic myself.” – Rupert Giles
8 “Since the picture you just painted means that I will never touch food of any kind again, you’ll just have to pick it up yourself.” – Rupert Giles
9 "With all the rubbish people keep sticking in my head, it's a wonder that there's room for my brain." – Spike
10 "Oh, I don't know. Looking in the mirror every day and seeing nothing there...it's an overrated pleasure.” – Angel
11 "Passion. It lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unwanted, unbidden, it will stir. Open it's jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us. Passion rules us all, and we obey. What other choice do we have?" – Angel
12 "Anyway, for real now, I'm gonna ask you something, and you gotta promise you'll be honest and not spare my feelings just 'cause I could kill you. You promise?" Faith
13 "You gotta give me something to do. There's no way I'm sleeping. Don't you need anyone dead? Or maimed? I can settle for maimed.” – Faith
14 "You know, I honestly don't think there's a human word fabulous enough for me.”- Glorificus
15 “I’m cookie dough. I’m not done baking. I’m not finished becoming whoever the hell it is I’m gonna turn out to be. I make it through this, and the next thing, and the next thing, and maybe one day, I turn around and realize I’m ready. I’m cookies. And then, you know, if I want someone to eat m — or enjoy warm, delicious, cookie me, then that’s fine. That’ll be then. When I’m done.” — Buffy Summers
16 “Seize the moment, ’cause tomorrow you might be dead.” — Buffy Summers
17 “The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live.” — Buffy Summers
18 “No weapons. No friends. No hope. Take all that away and what’s left?” “Me.” — Angelus & Buffy Summers
19 “Don’t you have an elsewhere to be?” – Cordelia Chase
20 “God! What is your childhood trauma?!” – Cordelia Chase
21 “Gee, can you vague that up for me?” – Buffy Summers
22 “I laugh in the face of danger. Then I hide until it goes away.” – Xander Harris
23 “I don’t know what your problem is, what your issues are. But as of this moment I officially don’t care.” – Xander Harris
24 “You’re really campaigning for bitch of the year, aren’t you?” – Cordelia Chase
25 “I mock you with my monkey pants!” – Oz
26 “Funny how preparing looks an awful lot like sitting on your ass.” – Spike
27 “That’s fairly freaksome.” – Oz
28 “Do you have any tact at all?” – Giles
29 “I’ve known you for two minutes and I can’t stand you.” – Spike
30 “Great. Now I’m gonna be stuck with serious thoughts all day.” – Cordelia Chase
31 “You didn’t happen to take a lot of drugs, did you?” – Willow
32 “I’ve seen honest faces…they usually come attached to liars.” – Willow
33 “Can I be blind, too?” – Xander
34 “Gee, I hope I’m not interrupting anything really depressing.” – Riley
35 “And you just accepted that? I only said that because I thought that’s what you wanted to hear.” – Anya
36 “This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed.” – Spike
37 “We’ve got to face it, we’ve changed. Well, not you—you’re still sadistic and self-centered.” – Giles
38 “Sometimes the most adult thing you can do is ask for help when you need it.” – Giles
39 “Did everybody have their Crazy Flakes today?” – Xander
40 “Do you love me?” “What?” “Do you?” “I love you. I don't know if I trust you.” “Maybe you shouldn't do either.” “Maybe I'm the one who should decide!” — Angel & Buffy
41 “Six a.m.!" NAME cried. "I know that's a number on my clock, but I've never actually been awake to personally witness it!” — Xander
42 “Bored now.” — Vampire Willow
43 “We’ll go be heroes.” — Spike
44 “You have a plan?” “I am the plan.” — Giles & Buffy
45 "Strong is fighting. It's hard and it's painful, and it's every day. It's what we have to do. And we can do it together." — Buffy
46 "I make it through this and the next thing and the next thing, and maybe one day I turn around and realize I'm ready." — Buffy
47 "You have to take care of each other. You have to be strong. NAME, the hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live, for me." — Buffy
48 "Make your choices. Are you ready to be strong?" — Buffy
49 “Weird love’s better than no love.” — Buffy
50 “The who having wha with huh?” — Buffy
51 “Whatever you choose, you’ve got my support. Just think of me as… as your… You know, I’m searching for supportive things and I’m coming up all bras. So, something slightly more manly, think of me as that.” – Xander
52 "A lot of things that seem strong and good and powerful, they can be painful." Angel
53 "To forgive is an act of compassion, NAME. It's-it's... it's not done because people deserve it. It's done because they need it." — Giles
54 "In the end, we all are who we are, no matter how much we may appear to have changed." — Giles
55 "I don't have time for vendettas. The mission is what matters." — Buffy
56 "I don't want to protect you from the world. I want to show it to you." — Buffy
57 "Make your choice. Are you ready to be strong?" — Buffy
58 "Recognizing power in another does not diminish your own." — Joss Whedon
59 “Out. For. A. Walk… Bitch.” — Spike
60 “You can’t see the stars, love. That’s the ceiling. Also, it’s day.” — Spike
61 “Is everyone here very stoned?” — Spike
62 “I feel safe with you.” [Chokes] “TAKE THAT BACK!” — Dawn & Spike
63 “I love you.” “Oh, my god.” “Hey, no. Look at me. I... love you. You're all I bloody think about... dream about. You're in my gut... my throat... I'm drowning in you, NAME. I'm drowning in you.” — Spike & Buffy
64 “Just... give me something. A crumb, the barest smidgen. Tell me maybe, someday there's a chance” “NAME ... the only chance you had with me was when I was unconscious.” “Oh, wha-“ [screams, then shouts] “What the bleeding hell is wrong with you bloody men/women? What the hell does it take? Why do you bitches torture me?” “Which question do you want me to answer first?” — Spike & Buffy
65 “You can't deny it. There's something between us.” “Loathing. Disgust.” — Spike & Buffy
66 “Could do without the laugh track, NAME.” “But it's so funny. I knew... before you did. I knew you loved the NAME. The pixies in my head whispered it to me.” — Spike & Drusilla
67 “Damn right I’m impure! I’m as impure as the driven yellow snow.” — Spike
68 “I love you.” “No, you don’t. But thanks for saying it.” — Spike & Buffy
69 “This with you, it’s wrong. I know it. I’m not a complete idiot.” — Spike
70 “You always hurt the ones you love, pet.” — Spike
71 "When I say ‘I love you,’ it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I’ve seen your kindness and your strength. I’ve seen the best and worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are." — Buffy
72 "I’m just gonna go home, lie down, and listen to country music. The music of pain." — Buffy
73 "I have feelings for you. I do. But it's not love. I could never trust you enough for it to be love." — Buffy
74 "Weird love's better than no love." — Buffy
75 “People don’t fall in love with what’s right in front of them. People want the dream — what they can’t have. The more unattainable, the more attractive.” — Buffy
76 "Trust is for old marrieds, NAME. Great love is wild and passionate and dangerous. It burns and consumes." “Until there's nothing left. Love like that doesn't last." — Spike & Buffy
77 "This isn't some fairy tale. When I kiss you...you don't wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after" — Angel
78 "I love you. I try not to, but I can't stop" — Angel
79 "If I may suggest, ‘This time it's personal.’ I mean, there's a reason why it's a classic." —Oz
80 "Well, to the casual observer, it would appear that you're trying to make your friend NAME jealous, or even the score, or something. And...that's on the empty side. See, in my fantasy, when I'm kissing you, you're kissing me. It's okay, I can wait." — Oz
81 "NAME’s our friend...except I don't like him/her.” — Xander
82 "What am I gonna do? I think about sex all the time! Sex ... Help! Four times five is thirty ... five times six is thirty-two ... Naked girls. Naked women ... Naked NAME ... Oh, stop me!" — Xander
83 "Man, NAME! My whole life just flashed before my eyes. I gotta' get me a life!" — Xander
84 “NAME. You're really campaigning for bitch-of-the-year, aren't you?” “As defending champion, you nervous?” — Cordelia & Buffy
85 "Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass." — Cordelia
86 “Oh please. Like shame is something to be proud of.” — Cordelia
87 “I’m going to give you some advice: get over it.” — Cordelia
88 “Oh, and you’re welcome.” — Cordelia
89 “I’m not a sniveling little cry-NAME. I’m the nastiest guy/girl in PLACE history. I take crap from no one.” — Cordelia
90 “I think it. I say it. It’s my way.” — Cordelia
91 "I don't like spiders, okay? Their furry bodies, and their sticky webs, and what do they need all those legs for anyway? I'll tell you - for crawling across your face in the middle of the night." — Willow
92 "I don't want danger. Big 'no’ to danger.” — Willow
93 "Let's get this straight. I don't understand it. I don't wanna' understand it. You have gross emotional problems. And things are not okay between us." — Willow
94 "NAME, I got so lost." "I found you. I will always find you." — Tara & Willow
95 "But you like him/her, and when you think about him/her, you get that good down-low tickle, right?" — Faith
96 "You hurt me, I hurt you. I'm just a little more efficient." — Faith
97 "Just relax ... and take off your pants." — Faith
98 "I am, you know." “What?" “Yours." — Tara & Willow
99 "I don't have time for bondage fun." - Buffy
100 “It's fine, I don't need to be snuggled.” — Willow
#buffy prompts#buffy quotes#btvs#writing prompts#dialogue prompts#drabble prompts#buffy summers#angel#cordelia chase#rupert giles#xander harris#willow rosenberg#faith#spike#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell
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50 Angel Prompts
I did Buffy now it’s Angel’s turn. As always break at 15 since it’s long.
1 “Here's the plan: We go in, I start hitting people hard in the face, see where it takes us." — Angel
2 [drunkenly] "I hurt a lot of people." “I don't believe that." — Angel & Rebecca
3 "I've been accused of a great many things in my time, but paranoid has never been one of them.” [ pause] “Unless people have been saying it behind my back.” — Wesley
4 "Seventeen karaoke bars... you know, I need to lie down and scrub out the inside of my head."— Angel
5 “Who are you?” "Who are you?" “I asked you first." “What are you, seven?” — Angel & Gwen Raiden
6 "So NAME knows about our relationship. Big deal." “A dollar! You owe me a dollar!” “Oh, damn." “You called this a 'relationship'." — Wesley and Lilah
7 “The enemy of my enemy ...” “Can kiss my ass too.” — Angel & Lilah
8 "There is a line, NAME. Black and white, good and evil.” "Funny thing about black and white — you mix it together and get gray. And it doesn't matter how much white you try to put back in, you’re never going to get anything but gray.” — Wesley & Lilah
9 “Oh, right, right. You promise you'll stay good?” “NAME.” “I'm kidding. Come in.” — Cordelia & Angel
10 “What happened to you, man. You look wrecked!” — Cordelia
11 “You actually live here?” — Angel
12 “So what are you looking for?” “Me? I guess it depends on how many daiquiris I've had. Wow, way to come off as a drunken slut.” — Angel & Kate
13 “I'm still going to go celebrate with a drink down in the pub.” “He'd/She’d celebrate the opening of a mailbox with a drink down in the pub.” — Doyle & Cordelia
14 “One of us has been drinking, and I'm sorry to say it's not me.” — Doyle
15 “So, we're OK, then?” “I'm way too big of a person to let something so petty get in the way of our friendship.” — Angel & Cordelia
16 “You can always tell when he's happy. His scowl? A little less scowly.” — Cordelia
17 “What are you doing out here?” “Skulking. Professionally.” — Gunn & Angel
18 “My question first, and tell the truth because you know I'll know: Why ‘Mandy?’” “Well, I-I know the words ... And, I kinda think it's pretty.” — Lindsey & Angel
19 [person a takes a piece of ice out of their drink and draws a line with it down the middle of Person b’s chest. Person b starts to laugh.] “Why are you so good to me -- after everything I did?” “Because - you and I are one.” [person a draws the ice cube across Person b’s lips. The phone stops ringing] “See? I told you it would stop.” [person a leans down and they kiss.] — Angel & Darla
20 “There's nothing I respect more than loyalty.” “That's good to hear.” — Gunn & Wesley
21 “And you just walked away?” “No, I walked to my car and then I drove away.” — Wesley & Angel
22 “What just happened? Can someone explain to me what just happened here?” — Cordelia
23 “I don't even know what you are anymore.” — Cordelia
24 “What're you doing?” “It doesn't matter.”
[pause] “None of it matters.” — Darla & Angel
25 “So you had an epiphany, did you?” “Yeah.” “So ... what? You just wake up, and 'bang'?” “Sort of the other way around.” — Gunn & Angel
26 “I feel like such an idiot.” “A lot of that going around.” — Kate & Angel
27 “Man, atonement's a bitch.” — Angel
28 “Could you stab me in the back a little deeper? I still have feeling in my legs.” — Lilah
29 “Keep the change.” “Wow, a whole dollar just for me. I'm the luckiest delivery man ever.” — Angel & delivery man
30 “Who do we know who has handcuffs?” “Well, I [pauses, as he was about to say, "do"] ... wouldn't know. “ — Angel & Wesley
31 “Bad things always happen here.” — Fred
32 [person b & c fighting] “Stop! I love him/her!” “You love me?” “Not you, dumb-ass! Him/Her!” [quietly] “I mean, as a friend, and co-worker ...” — Cordelia & Angel
33 “What's your version of love? ‘It's not real unless it kills me’?” “What's yours? ‘It's fun as long as it doesn't cost me anything’? You think you won because you're still alive? I lived. You just existed.” — Angel & James
34 “Well, you know what they say... life's full of surprises.” — Darla
35 “Hey, Mr. and Mrs. Bickerson! A little focus, please.” — Cordelia
36 “Ask me why I'm smiling.” “I will because it's scaring me.” — Angel & Cordelia
37 “You're not gonna untie me, are you?” “Pfft!” — Angel & Cordelia
38 “Can I take off this blindfold yet?” “No.” [grabs person b around the waist] “Can I take off something else?” — Angelus & Darla
39 “Life should be beautiful and bright but no matter how hard I try, everything I touch turns to ashes.” — Angel
40 “You're lying.” “I'm fibbing. It's lying, only classier.” — Angel & Gwen
41 “They talk about me in the chatty rooms?” — Angel
42 “You know what they say about payback? Well I'm the bitch.” — Fred
43 “Daddy's not finished talking.” — Angel
44 “I'm invisible.” “No your not.” — Angel & Cordelia
45 “NAME? Were we in love?” “We were.” — Angel & Cordelia
46 “Rah rah! Good over evil! Do what must be done! Hang in there, kitten, it's almost Friday!” — Angelus
47 “I already know all this crap. So why do I have to go through it again?” “Maybe because it's not about you, jackass.” — Angelus & Angel
48 “Because you're so clever.” “On the scale of you to me? Pretty damn.” — Angel & Cordelia
49 “I have 37 cats, and I've just changed all their names to Jasmine!” — Elderly Woman
50 “Think I'm hot, do you?” “Hmm. Lukeworm. Just above room temperature.” — Spike & Fred
#angel prompts#angel quotes#dialogue prompts#writing prompts#drabble prompts#cordelia chase#angel#wesley wyndam pryce#charles gunn#winifred burkle#allen francis doyle#long post#read more#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell
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Howard Wolowitz Prompts
1 “You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.” “Why?” “Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.”
2 “NAME does not cry.” “That's true, you'd rust.”
3 “I invented a game. Want to play?” “Sure.” “It's called NAME or DOG NAME. I give you actual quotes I've heard NAME say, and you guess if he/she was talking to his/her boyfriend/girlfriend or his/her dog.”
4 “Settle this. Those little animated pictures on the Internet, are they called ‘gifs’ or ‘jifs’?” “Well, the G stands for ‘graphics.’ That's a hard G, so I'd say ‘gif.’” “What? The guy who invented it says it's ‘jif.’” “I'm sorry, do you mean the guy or the juy?”
5 “So you can never take it (the sweater) off?” “No.” “Not even to sleep?” “No.” “So you're just an idiot?” “It's called proving a point.” “Is the point you're an idiot?”
6 “We have to go over some ground rules about NAME.” “Like when it turns out he’s/she's made of rubber, I don't say anything?” “He’s/She's very real.” “That's what it says on the box. Right next to dishwasher safe.”
7 “Aren't you gonna come with me?” “While you confront your father:mother about his/her sex life? I'd rather go back to that bar in assless chaps.”
8 “OK, is everyone clear on the plan?” “Yes, NAME 1’s going to wet himself/herself I'm gonna throw up, NAME 2’s gonna run away and you're going to die. Shall we synchronize our watches?”
9 “NAME, let me take this opportunity to point out that you are looking particularly ravishing today.” “Not with a thousand condoms, NAME.” “So there is a number.”
10 “Hey, you want to make sure he/she gets nowhere with NAME without jeopardizing your friendship with either of them?” “I'm listening.” “Just tell him/her to do everything you've done with him/her for the last two years.”
11 “On the potty, what are you five?” “It's a potty, what do you call it?” “A toilet.” “That's a little vulgar for the dinner table, don't you think?” “And potty is okay?” “Potty is innocent. Potty is adorable.” “What do you do on the potty, wee-wee?” “If I don't have to boom-boom.”
12 “Try telling him/her it's a non-optional social convention.” “What?” “Just do it!” “It's a non-optional social convention.” “Oh, fair enough.” “He/She came with a manual.”
13 [NAME smiles in a grotesque way] “Oh crap that's terrifying.”
14 “He/She didn't dump me. We were just in different places in the relationship.” “I fail to see how a relationship can have the qualities of a geographical location.” “It's very simple. NAME was living in a little town called ‘Please don't leave me’, while NAME had just moved to the island of ‘Bye-bye!’”
15 “Are you planning on kidnapping a man/woman?” “Sarcasm?” “Yes, but mixed with genuine concern.”
16 “NAME knows football? I mean Quidditch, sure, but football?”
17 “Puppies, how do you stand on puppies?” “A puppy once bit my face!” “Of course it did.”
18 “NAME, there's no place for truth on the Internet.”
19 “I see. I assume since the rest of you have set the bar so low, you're saving the most impressive contribution for last. Go on NAME, dazzle me.” “Well, my power is the ability to pretend like I give a damn about your piddly-ass problem. And that's 24/7 buddy.”
20 “You can't just throw everything in the closet.” “Hey, you can tell me what to do and how to do it, but not both at the same time. This isn't sex.”
21 “We're looking for NAME, not Marmaduke.”
22 “NAME it's the phone!” “I know it's the phone NAME! I hear the phone!” “Who is calling at this ungodly hour?” “I don't know!” “Well ask them why are they calling at this ungodly hour!” “How can I ask them when I'm talking to you?”
23 “Well no, you're mistaken. You give speeches all the time. What you can't do is shut up.”
24 “The way I see it, I'm halfway to pity sex.”
25 “Why do I even try?” “I'm going to fix this right now.” “Okay, but just make it look like an accident.”
26 “Love is not a sprint, it's a marathon, a relentless pursuit that only ends when he/she falls into your arms — or hits you with the pepper spray.”
27 “Look, if you don't want to go to the party, just don't go. You're a grown man. Act like one. Tell NAME you want to spend the weekend having a sleepover and playing video games with your friends!”
28 “Can we take a moment to discuss that I just lied to the government for you?” “Yeah, I would not have done that for you.”
29 “NAME ruined Raiders of the Lost Ark* for me, so I'm trying to find something beloved of his/hers and ruin that.” “Because his/her life wasn't enough?” *[insert any movie, play or book]
30 “I think you broke the dowels. You're not gonna have time to glue it back on. You'll have to nail it.” “With what?” “Does he/she have any pillows or wine glasses?” “He/She does.”
“Great. Neither of those. Try a hammer!” “Did that feel good? You feel like a big man now?”
31 “Why're you being so quiet? You upset or are you just rebooting?”
32 “Come on, NAME, Star Wars.” “I'm pushing play. I mean it. If we don't start soon, George Lucas is going to change it again.”
33 “Come on, one day this may double in value and be worth half what I paid for it!”
34 [Chuckles] “Look at that. There's finally a man/woman in your life you can talk to.”
35 “I shouldn't be raising a kid. I don't even eat my own vegetables.”
36 “I love you. And I'm not just saying that because your breasts are gonna get bigger.”
37 “First take a picture with me.” “Why?” “Well, NAME and I always talked about learning how to make cocktails like this together, so I taught myself and I'm putting this on Instagram so he/she can see it and feel like a turd. Say cheese!”
38 “Stop hitting on my man/lady or you shall experience my wrath.” “I am not hitting on him/her.” “And I am not your Lady.” “And you have no wrath.”
39 “NAME, relax. I am not interested in your boyfriend/girlfriend.” “I hope not. Because you don't wanna mess with me.” [Gets in NAME’s face] “I'm crazy.”
40 “How did you get so brave all of a sudden?” “It's easy. The spider's crawling up your arm.”
41 “Why are you back from your date so early?” “Well, in romance, as in show business, always leave them wanting more.” “What exactly does that mean?” “He/She struck out.”
42 “Sit, you look like you've had a long day.” “Naw, she always looks like that. ... Because she married an idiot.”
43 “You guys never use that space up there. Why not get a table?” “Do you want the long answer or the short answer?” “How come we never get that option?”
44 “You're a putz. Do you what that means?” “Yeah. Do you?”
45 “Excuse me, I happen to be very comfortable with my masculinity.” “How is that possible?”
46 “Oh, you're saying I don't do anything around here? Look at my chore chart!”
47 “Well don't come crying to me when you don't get your allowance.” “It's not an allowance. It's a stipend! And we said we weren't going to call it an allowance in front of my friends.”
48 “Neither of them will be the actual cake. I'm just using it as a bargaining chip to get NAME to agree to the whole wedding party getting rings and us getting one ring to rule them all.” “I forget, which mental hospital are you guys registered at?”
49 “You know what we should do? We should show the closet to NAME.” “Why?” “Are you kidding? He’s/She’s like a savant at organizing. Everything in his/her apartment/house has a label on it. Including his/her label maker, which has a label that says label maker. And if you look really close at that label maker label, you’ll see a label that says label.”
50 “I was so smooth on that date.” “Dude, I made you smooth. You were an idiot.” “Whatever, dude. He/She kissed me.” “It might have been on your lips, but it was my kiss.” “Oh, fine. Let's agree he/she kissed both of us.” “Okay.”
#howard wolowitz#big bang theory quotes#big bang theory prompts#dialogue prompts#writing prompts#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell
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Prompt lists
Love prompts as much as I do? You’ve come to the right place! Check out these and other lists I’ve reblogged at @nevermetapromptlistididntlove
Request a movie or show
80 Grey’s Anatomy Prompts
60 Once Upon a Time Prompts
70 Scrubs Prompts
50 Charmed Prompts
125 How I Met Your Mother Prompts
100 New Girl Prompts
125 Golden Girls Prompts
50 Grimm Prompts
100 Buffy Prompts
50 Angel Prompts
Big Bang Theory Prompts Masterlist
60 Spongebob Squarepants Prompts ✨
100 Roseanne Prompts
200 Brooklyn 99 Prompts
100 Boy Meets World Prompts
107 The Good Place Prompts
100 Psych Prompts
50 Gotham Prompts
75 Siren Prompts
50 Mean Girl Prompts ✨
91 Lucifer Prompts
200 Harry Potter Prompts
75 Criminal Minds Prompts
50 The Umbrella Academy Prompts
30 Christmas Character Asks
✨- requested list
#writing prompts#prompt masterlist#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell
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Sheldon Cooper Prompts
1 “I don't like bugs, okay. They freak me out.” “Interesting. You're afraid of insects and women. Ladybugs must render you catatonic.”
2 “Why are you crying?” “Because I'm stupid.” “That's no reason to cry. One cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.”
3 “I did a bad thing.” “Does it affect me?” “No.” “Then suffer in silence.”
4 “Then it's settled. NAME’s birthday present will be my genitals.”
5 “May I say something?” “Not right now, NAME.” “But I think it may be comforting.” “Buddy —“ “No, it's okay. What?” “When I lost my own father/mother, I didn't have any friends to help me through it. You do.”
6 “On the contrary I find the Grinch to be a relatable and engaging character. And I was really with him, right up to the point that he succumbed to social convention, returned the presents and saved Christmas.”
7 “I'm exceedingly smart. I graduated college at fourteen. While my brother/sister was getting an STD, I was getting a Ph.D. Penicillin can't take this away.”
8 “There's no denying that I have feelings for you that can't be explained in any other way. I briefly considered that I had a brain parasite, but that seems even more far-fetched. The only conclusion was love.”
9 “(3 knocks) “NAME!” (3 knocks) “NAME!” (3 knocks) “NAME!” “What happens if I say come in?” “Well, find out.” “Come in!” (silence) (3 knocks) “NAME 2!” (3 knocks) “NAME 2!” (3 knocks) “NAME 2!” “Come in!” “Keep it up. I've got nowhere else to be.” “Just come in.” “For future reference, if I want to watch Mean Girls, I'll just stream it on Netflix.”
10 “I'd like to go over some proposed changes to the roommate agreement, specifically to address NAME’s annoying personal habits.” “Oh my God! What personal habits?” “I have a list. FYI overuse of the phrase "Oh my God" is number 12.”
11 “Oh, big deal. Not knowing is part of the fun.” “‘Not knowing is part of the fun.’ Was that the motto of your community college?”
12 “Thankfully all the things my boyfriend/girlfriend used to do can be taken care of with my right hand.”
13 “Can I respond now?” “Do it.” “You mess with the bull, you get the horns. I'm about to show this guy just how horny I can be.” “Somebody else do it.”
14 “Well, he/she did soften your life, didn't he/she?” “Yes! He’s/She's like the dryer sheets of my heart!”
15 “Oh, I should probably tell you something about this gift.” “You mean, before you give it to me?” “Yes. But may I ask you a question before I give it to you?” “Of course.” “Why are we saying give it to you like that?”
16 “I'm not being weird. Am I being weird?” “Yes. And that's coming from me.”
17 “I thought you didn't like Facebook any more.” “Don't be silly, I'm a fan of anything that tries to replace actual human contact.”
18 “I would have been here sooner but the bus kept stopping for other people to get on it.”
19 “This is NAME. He's/she’s your best friend in the world.” “All right, just stop. This is ridiculous.” “Sometimes he/she gets cranky, but you can trust him/her with your life. And he/she does more things for you than I can even begin to list.” “Thank you.”
20 “This is why I've been saying we should keep champagne on ice.” “Sarcasm?” “Yes.” “That was tricky because when it comes to alcohol, he/she generally means business.”
21 “Oh gravity, thou art a heartless bitch.”
22 “I give up. He's impossible.” “I can't be impossible; I exist. I think what you meant to say is, 'I give up; he's improbable'.”
23 “Relax, it's just a dirty sock.” “How on earth can you say ‘dirty sock’ and ‘relax’ in the same sentence?”
24 “NAME , you know me to be a very smart man/woman. Don't you think that if I were wrong, I'd know it?”
25 “So, what do you guys do for fun around here?” “Well, today we tried masturbating for money.”
26 “No cuts, no buts, no coconuts.”
27 “When we watch Frosty the Snowman, he/she roots for the sun.” “Excuse me, but the sun is essential for all life on earth. Frosty is merely a bit of frozen, supernatural ephemera in a stolen hat. A crime, by the way, for which he is never brought to account.”
28 “Do you think we can outrun him/her?” “I don't need to outrun him/her, I just need to outrun you.”
29 “Ah, memory impairment; the free prize at the bottom of every vodka bottle.”
30 “What the hell's going on?” “You hypocrite.” “What?” “Little Miss Grown-Ups-Don't-Play-With-Toys! If I went into that apartment right now, would I not find Beanie Babies? Are you not an accumulator of Care Bears and My Little Ponies? And who is that Japanese feline I see frolicking on your shorts? Hello, Hello Kitty!”
31 “You're inferring I'm stupid.” “That's not correct. We implied you're stupid, you then inferred it.”
32 “You got me something?” “Oh. Not just something. It's from the heart, it's holiday-themed, and I swallowed the gift receipt so you can not return it.”
33 “You can't make a half sandwich. If it's not half of a whole sandwich, it's just a small sandwich.”
34 “I can't seem to get in touch with NAME. I tried e-mail, video chat, tweeting him/her, posting on his/her Facebook wall, texting him/her, nothing.” “Did you try calling him/her on the telephone?” “The telephone. You know, NAME, in your own simple way, you may be the wisest of us all.”
35 “How often does one see a beloved fictional character come to life?” “Every year at ComiCon. Every day at Disneyland. You can hire Snow White to come to your house. Of course they prefer if you have a kid.”
36 “Soft Kitty, Warm Kitty, Little Ball of Fur. Happy Kitty, Sleepy Kitty, Purr, Purr, Purr.”
37 “I'm the guy/girl.” “You're not the guy/girl.” “Are you sure? It would explain so much. Your constant presence in my apartment. That baffling dalliance with NAME just to be near me. The way you call me sweetie all the time.” “I call everyone sweetie.” “You tramp.”
38 “Do you want to say it?” “Let's say it together.” Both: “We're getting a turtle!”
39 “I've seen and talked to you more in the two days we've been broken up than in the last two months we were together.” “Well, if you want to see less of me, maybe we should go out again.”
40 “Are they making fun of us?” “Yep.” “I miss the old days when I couldn't tell.”
41 “Well, this is very pleasant.” “I'm glad you're enjoying yourself.” “And you said there would never be enough pasta for the three of us.”
42 “NAME, could I ask you a question?” “I would prefer that you not, but I wouldn't go so far as to forbid it.”
43 “If you don't mind, I'd like to stop listening to you and start talking.”
44 “There there, everything is going to be fine ... NAME’s here!”
45 “Are you listening to yourself?” “I always listen to myself. It's one of the great joys of my life.”
46 “You know what, go to Hell and set their thermostat.” “I don't have to go to Hell. At 73 degrees, I'm there already!”
47 “NAME, I excel at many things, but getting over you wasn't one of them. I think I need to just be your friend.”
48 “I have a two-part question.” “Go ahead.” “A: Are you kidding? And B: Seriously, are you freaking kidding me?” “A: I rarely kid, and B: when I do kid, you will know it by my use of the word ‘Bazinga’.” “So you're saying the two of you are going to be sleeping in the same bed?” “Yes. Bazinga.”
49 “Get back here, you stupid bird, so I can love you.”
50 “Acquiring a joint pet is a big step for us.” “It's true. It means we care so much about each other, there's enough left over for an eight-ounce reptile.”
#sheldon cooper#big bang theory prompts#big bang theory quotes#dialogue prompts#writing prompts#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy#i live in covid 19 hell
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Stuart, Barry, Bert & Zack Prompts
Stuart Bloom
1 “Oh, NAME, I'm afraid you couldn't be more wrong.” “More wrong? Wrong is an absolute state and not subject to gradation.” “Of course it is. It's a little wrong to say a tomato is a vegetable, it's very wrong to say it's a suspension bridge.”
2 “How old is this Jell-O?” “Well, it's carrots, so I'm gonna say very.”
3 “What kind of music are you thinking of?” “I like all kinds of music, but my favorite genre is free.”
4 “What are you doing here? You're not NAME.” “I thought that might come up. NAME hired me to go shopping with you.”
5 “Come on, you pain in the ass!” “That's me! Bye, NAME.” “Wait! I'm a pain in the ass, too!”
6 “I don't think I've ever felt so rejected. And I had a rescue dog that ran back to the pound!”
7 “You couldn't give us just one weekend?” “I told him/her this was a bad idea.”
8 “How about those guys on that bench over there? They look pathetic. Maybe we could talk to them.” “That's a mirror.”
9 “I don't mean to be rude, NAME, but my life is kinda falling apart right now.”
10 “Hey, NAME.” “Hey.” “Where is everybody?” “I could ask you the same question.” “Wow, this conversation got mean fast.”
11 “I can't believe you went behind my back!” “Which clearly means I want this more!” “You want to play a game of ‘who's more desperate’ with me? 'Cause you're in the big leagues now, Bucko.”
12 “Oh. Oh, my God.” “Yeah. I wanted to look my best for our date, and I made a series of bad decisions one of which is hidden by my pants.”
13 “I know what you're going through. My last break-up was pretty tough.” “Oh, what was his/her name?” “Hey, it's a true story. I don't need the third degree.”
14 “Ready?” “You sure I didn't need to see Paddington 1?” “He's a bear, he talks, no one knows why. You're all caught up.”
15 “I just hope I did the right thing.” “I'm sure you did. Maybe that's the problem, you always do the right thing. Maybe it's time to do the wrong thing?” “Like you're doing right now?” “Exactly.”
Barry Kripke
16 “Yes, yes, yes. He's a jolly good fellow. What time do the strippers arrive?”
17 “That's where I sit.” “Ooh, you have a special spot. What kind of wacko are you?”
18 “Whoa, whoa, whoa. You didn't tell me we were doing this just to stick it to NAME.” “Well --“ “I messing with you. This sundae just got a cherry on top!”
19 “NAME, what would you say to the idea of you and I becoming friends?” “I would say ‘I have no interest in becoming your friend’.”
20 “Nobody cares, NAME. Wrap it up.”
21 “I don't know, NAME. It sounds a little sleazy.” “Well, let me know if you change your mind. Sleazy is where I thrive.”
22 “You see. People have been pointing and laughing at me all morning.” “Not true. People have been pointing and laughing at you your whole life.”
23 “Actually, NAME, we're not going to have strippers tonight.” “Aww, then what the flip did I get $200 in singles out for?”
24 “Can you give us a minute?” “Take your time. I'll walk out backwards for dramatic effect.”
25”Well, well, well. This is a pickle.” “Yes, so, if you will just move your birthday party to a different location, everything will be fine.” “Ugh, it's tricky. I don't want to move my party, but I also don't want to help you. Oh, wait, I don't have a problem.”
26 “My credibility may have been damaged.” “Completely wrecked.”
27 “How was rock climbing?” “He/She passed out. He/She just hung there like a big salami.”
28 “I like to floss before I eat so my gum pockets are open to new food.”
29 “What is his/her problem?”
30 “Hello. How did I walk past you? I'm NAME.” “NAME 2.” “That's not a very hot name. I'm gonna call you NEW NAME.”
31 “All right, NAME, here's all the proof you need.” “Great, thanks.” “Just remember, once you take this envelope, there's no turning back.” “What if I look at it and decide not to use it?” “I had not considered that. Got to hand it to you, you got a real talent for making things boring.” “Thanks.” “Hey, look at that. You did it again.”
Bert
32 “I don't really have dreams, when I sleep or in life.”
33 “He/She was also interested in walking around my house in his/her underwear. Now the only one that does that is me.”
34 “Wow. A scavenger hunt. That's exciting. I had a bit of a scavenger hunt myself last night. I was trying to find the remote. I looked under one of the cushions. Wasn't there. Then I lifted the cushion a little higher. Bingo.” “Riveting.”
35 “Uh, let's-let's do it here, in-in the evenings, after everyone's gone home.” “I just have to see if my evenings are free. That's a joke. They are.”
36 “Well, I really envy your relationship. Other than you two only having sex once a year, you're the perfect couple.”
37 “I'm sure it's just 'cause I'm dating NAME.” “Mm, actually, I think NAME’s popular because he's/she’s dating you.”
38 “Really? You're jealous of us?” “Yeah. I even had this crazy dream last night where I ate you both.” “Seriously?” “Uh. I know. I was pretty out of it.” “Who'd you eat first?” “Oh. Uh, you.” [chuckles] “Nice.”
Zack Johnson
39 [At Person b’s door] “Babe, open up.” “I'm not talking to you.” “Then who are you talking to? Babe?”
40 “So, uh, what are you guys talking about?” “Your friends were just telling me about all the other guys/girls you're dating.” “Why would you do that? I specifically asked you not to do that.” “We didn't.” “You just did.” “Wow. Maybe none of you guys are smart.”
41 “You want to go with em?” “No.” “Okay, see you later.” “Wait, w-w-wait-wait-wait, youre ditching me to go look at comic books?” “Are you mad at me?” “I’m not happy.” “Milk Dud?”
42 “NAME thinks when we broke up, it didn't bother me.” “That's crazy. When we were going out, he/she used to talk about you all the time. In fact, I think he/she only dated me because I reminded him/her of you.” “Sure. Because we're both people?” “Damn right we are.”
43 “Okay, I'm ready. I'm NAME, and I'm, uh ... oh, crap, why is this so hard?”
44 “NAME, this is my friend NAME 2.” “You're hot. You seeing anybody?” “Uh, he’s/she's seeing me.” “Why'd you say he’s:she's your friend?” “We're just keeping it casual.” “Why is he/she being casual with you? You seem great.” “I don't know. Ask him/her.” “Why are you being casual with him/her? He/She seems great.”
45 “It's my fault. I was a terrible husband/wife. I was never around.”
46 “Boy, you get some dirty looks over there when you ask for ice.”
47 “Are you guys fighting?” “Yeah.” “No.” “Are you fighting about whether or not you're fighting? 'Cause I've had that fight before. Turns out we were, and I lost.”
48 “Hey, where's your fiance?” “Oh, he/she couldn't make it. He/She had an emergency.” “Oh, no, what happened?” “I didn't ask.”
49 “So do you have it?” “Of course I do. NAME gave it to me as a gift. You don't get rid of something like that.”
50 “I'm NAME and I'm, uh ... could you come back to me?”
#big bang theory quotes#big bang theory prompts#dialogue prompts#writing prompts#barry kripke#bert#zack johnson#stuart bloom#i live in covid 19 hell#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy
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Amy Farrah Fowler Prompts
1 “I gave you one job! Keep an eye on him/her. How hard is that?”
2 “Thank you for understanding.” “Of course I understand. NAME, there's something else I've been wanting to say, but before I do, I just. I want you to know you don't have to say it back. I know you're not ready and I don't want you to say it just because social convention dictates —“ “I love you, too.” “You said it.”
3 “NAME does not get lucky.” “You and me both, brother.”
4 “Do you have any idea how hard it is to laugh at a knock knock joke that starts ‘Knock Knock Knock, NAME. Knock Knock Knock, NAME. Knock Knock Knock, NAME’?”
5 “It's too late. He's/She’s been murdered by someone in this room. Welcome to another classic NAME murder mystery dinner.” “I'm leaving.”
6 [knocks three times] NAME 1, NAME 2, NAME 3. [repeats three times] “He's/She’s never going to stop doing that, is he/she?” “I don't mind. I'm hoping to put his/her love of repetition to good use someday.”
7 “Do I really force you to do things you don't want to?” “Yeah, but it's okay.” “How is it okay?” “I promised myself if I ever got friends I'd do whatever they said. Really, I'm lucky you found me before a cult did.”
8 “You are aware that your ritualistic knocking behavior is symptomatic of obsessive-compulsive disorder?” “Is not. Is not. Is not.” “Denial. Denial. Denial.”
9 “What is your problem?” “It's Valentine's day. We're supposed to be having a romantic weekend.” “Oh, really? 'cause I remember you saying this trip was going to be something we could both enjoy. Did you mean that or were you just trying to trick me?” “Fine, it's true. I deserve romance and I didn't know how else to make it happen.”
10 “Well, wait. What if, just this once, we suspend the date night parameters and you stay later?” “Well, as long as we're suspending the parameters. I could stay really late and we could have our first sleepover.” “That's a big step.” “It's a big fort.”
11 “NAME, that was beautiful.” “If you didn't press record —“ “I pressed it!”
12 “Hi, NAME.” “Hello.” “Are you feeling any better?” “Physically, yes, but I'm upset because everyone's mad at me for no good reason.” “Why don't you tell me what happened, and in a gentle, loving way, I'll explain to you why you're wrong.”
13 “How's your life?” “Like everybody else's, subject to entropy, decay and eventual death. Thank you for asking.”
14 “Yes, dirty. Dirty, dirty, dirty. Which brings me to our next order of business.” [Kisses them] “Fascinating.” “I hope you don't take what I'm about to do as a comment on what we just did.” [Runs to bathroom and vomits]
15 “You know, its a tad old-school, but my father was not one to spare the rod when my brother would sneak into his truck and drink his driving whiskey.” “You want to spank me?”
16 “I don't have (Valentine's) plans, which is why I booked time on the big telescope that night.” “An evening looking at the stars, that's still kinda romantic.” “Except I'd be alone.” “I'm trying to put lipstick on a pig here. Work with me.”
17 “I have a sorta kinda boyfriend/girlfriend at home playing with a model train, but you don't hear me bitching about it.”
18 “You better watch that attitude, buddy. You're dating the popular boy/girl now.”
19 “I'll let you in on a little secret. Originally, we were painted nude. But I had him add clothes cause I thought it was an unnecessary challenge to our heterosexuality.” “Yeah, good call.” “But, if you ever change your mind, all it would take is some warm, soapy water and a couple of sponges.” “You're talking about the painting, right?” “Sure.”
20 “NAME 1, I think you might find the support you're looking for if you realize relationships are a give and take. He/She can only be there for you as much as you are for him/her.” “Thank you, NAME 3.” “And NAME 2, you need to be patient with NAME 1 and stop pressuring him/her into accepting intimacy on your terms.” “You should probably go.”
21 “You know if we did a shot every time they said something embarassing, this would be one hell of a drinking game.” “Little early for alcohol, isn't it?” [On the radio] “You know, I don't just say smart things about science, I also yodel.” [Yodelling] “I'll get the vodka.”
22 “And action.” “And cut! You realize I'm doing this for free, right?” “Yes, and so far we're still not getting our money's worth.”
23 “Stop it! Today is not about you, it's about NAME and NAME, and me!”
24 “Where are the kids?” “Oh, NAME’s helping NAME give them a bath.” “Hmm. So you really think you can trick NAME into liking babies?” “I slept with him/her. I married him/her. You want to bet against me?”
25 “Coming. Yup, that's good. Wine glasses should have handles.” [Answers the door] “Keeping accurate track of your alcohol intake. Smart idea considering how trampy you get when you've had a few.” “You heard what I did?” “I heard who you did.”
26 “I don't want five dollars, I want my dignity.” “So, what are we talking, like ten bucks?”
27 “Come on. Let's get you to bed. You've had a lot to drink.” “No more than NAME.” “That's what I'm saying.”
28 “How could you do that?” “I'm sorry, but you know what it's like when you're with your man/woman and one thing leads to another.” “I do know what that's like. I really do.”
29 “Is that book called ‘Lies I tell to get sex’?” “Is that a real book? I would totally read that book.” “Can I borrow it when you're done?”
30 “Then I met NAME and look at where we are now.” “You've kissed like once in three years.” “That's true. Do whatever you want.”
31 “Are you sure your moth-like personality won't be drawn to this blazing fire that is myself?” “More and more sure.”
32 “Your husband's weird and his clothes are ridiculous.”
33 “Did he/she say she didn't like you?” “Of course not. Nobody ever says they don't like you straight to your face.” “Heh, we have led different lives!”
34 “You know there was a time when I was alone and had no friends. I'm starting to miss that.”
35 “You're acting odd. Why?” “I'm odd all the time. Everyone knows that. Just last night, I tried to see how many Fava beans I could fit in my mouth.” “Tell me the truth.” “28.” “Come on.” “56.”
36 “Uh-oh.” “What?” “I left the food out.” “You afraid it's gonna go good?”
37 “You know how, when you're sick, you're allowed to be cranky and say whatever you want and other people's feelings don't matter?” “Ooh. Gentle and loving. This is gonna be tricky.”
38 “Given the choice of anyone in the world, who would you want as a dinner guest?” “I can honestly say NAME.” “Aww, then I choose a janitor, because I'm about to throw up.”
39 “Please pass the butter!”
40 “Why can't there just be one week each month for famous people to die?” “Well, they've already arranged to die in threes. What more do you want from them?”
41 “I miss this.” “How can you miss a game you've never played before, silly?” “I guess sometimes I'm silly.”
42 “You don't know what it's like to feel completely frustrated. To have a desire build up within you and be denied any opportunity for release.” “Yeah, sounds like a drag.”
43 “Look, I know this is your wedding, and you can do whatever you want, but if you think anyone but me is gonna be your maid of honor, then you're an idiot because you are my best friend.” “Too late, NAM—” [pushes person b out of the way, rushes to hug persona a] “Bestie!”
44 “You and I never hang out like this. Why is that?” “I know, it's weird, right?” “Yeah, we should do it more often.” “Oh, no. I mean this is weird right now.”
45 “It actually was kinda fun.” “You're just saying that.” “Yeah.”
46 “If Harry Potter's wand can make decisions, why can't Thor's hammer?” “Okay, if you are going to start comparing wands and hammers, I can't even take you seriously.”
47 “I made your favorite oatmeal — plain.”
48 “Hi, NAME. What's new?” “Our friends are jerks, and I'm mad at all of them.” “I said, ‘What's new?’ but sure.”
49 “FYI, I had a donut for breakfast, you jerk.”
50 “Can you stop breathing so loud? I can hear your nose whistling.” “I can hear your face talking, so we're even.”
#amy farrah fowler#big bang theory quotes#big bang theory prompts#writing prompts#dialogue prompts#i live in covid 19 hell#quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy
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