#so when said authors develop it you're disappointed

[randomnameless]

Reverse uno card : Jugdral edition

2014 : "yay, i can't wait for a Judgral remake, with updated graphics!!!"

2024 : "gods please no remake"

What happened in ten years to make me dread the remake I would have sold my soul for back in the days?

Well... IS's policies and new writing, mainly.

While I was joking about "Genealogy of the Holy Self Insert" in 2015, I still had faith in eventual Jugdral remakes. Sure, we were in the big Fateswakening era where the only things I could frown at IS were the "writings" worshipping self inserts (Ryoma being jealous of Corn's talents, when Corn was like, 5?) - but I still had hope for a more "serious" FE, and I first I was very delighted by FE15 - no self insert, a more "serious" setting, no hyperbolic time chambers to try to explain in watsonian words why second gens exist, etc...

But there was still something ringing dead wrong with FE15, which I only noticed thanks to FE16 and its years of discourse - at one point, IS's writing went in a certain direction that makes it impossible, imo, for us to have a "correct" Jugdral remake, as long as IS still follows this direction.

I'm not talking about uwufest - even if it is part of the larger problem - but back in FE15, I remember being really pissed at the schizophrenia of the plot : saying one thing and the inverse at the same time.

The narration reminds us of the classic Kaga lesson : whatever madness exists in dragon/gods, a greater madness/evil lurks in the heart of men.

And yet, we have the Hero (who was so cajoled by the plot that, at times, you have to wonder if Alm wasn't the devs's self insert, he's lavished with praises almost as extensively as Ike was!) saying nonsense - without being contradicted by characters at all (or when Celica does it, she admits later she's wrong) - like Duma being responsible, mainly, for the events that transpired in Valentia and, novelty that wouldn't have been in the original game since the character was made for the remake, Berkut's fall and madness.

By that point in the game, the player saw that Berkut hunts low class people for what he sees and perceives as sport, is the textbook classicist asshat noble, but has a lot of pression on his shoulders due to his role of being the heir of the Empire, pression that isn't alleviated at all by his Uncle who mocks him and refuses to give him a third chance... to fight against a person said uncle very well knows cannot be defeated by Berkut himself, especially as said Uncle pretended to "care" for him, only to pit him against his trueborn son whom he names his heir just before dying.

Point is : Berkut feels betrayed by Rudy and goes mad - because of this betrayal : Rudolph named him heir when he fully knew Alm was alive and was the true heir he always wanted, in Berkut's eyes, no matter what he did, it wouldn't have mattered to Rudolph since Rudolph planned on giving Alm his throne since day 1 - of course, without telling him a thing and making him believe he would one day become Emperor.

Is it Duma's fault that Berkut went off the deep-end in Part 4? Because Rudolph's shit gambit involved playing with the life of his nephew and crush it in a bid to have Alm unify the continent against Duma ? Or... it's just Rudolph being an asshole, not curbing the worst of his nephew tendencies (and in a larger part, of Rigel in general) ?

Now, Rinea. She too, is called one of Duma's victims, and yet, who pushed her in Duma's magic pyre that turns women in witches? Duma himself?

No.

Berkut, who already, when pissed tells her "silence woman" pushes his fiancée and love of his life in a pyre to sacrifice her, because in his grief and rage (caused by Rudy!!!) Rinea is only a pawn to be sacrificed to gain more power to kill Alm. Sure sure, Berkut is redeemed in death and Rinea - in a classic Kaga style writing that wasn't here made by Kaga since this plot is basically new so where the fuck does this sexism come from - forgives him and they both die and ascend to another plane of existence.

The point is, despite what Alm says, Berkut and Rinea's fates weren't caused by Duma's degeneration - but by Rudolph and Berkut's own actions.

Heck, I remember when I was sort of live-blogging my run back then, Desaix's greed and lust for power wasn't fueled by Mila's apathy : it wasn't Mila who burnt Celica's house and tried to cook Conrad, it was Desaix, and why Desaix did it? Because he wanted to become king. That's it, and that's all.

So why FE15 - while giving the Kaga message - still tries its hardest to pin the blame of everything "wrong that happened" on... dragon gods, refusing to acknowledge the own responsibilities of humans in their suffering?

I think we had that lunar dialogue at the end of FE15 (or in part 4?) where Clive (i think?) tells Alm without gods giving their blessings, people in Valentia will starve, and Alm saying that may be so, but ultimately Valentia will survive and work hard through those upcoming harsh times to demonstrate how humans, when they work together, can achieve things without needing to rely on Gods - basically, King Alm tells his people to starve now because Humanity will come out stronger afterwards, since they will have learnt to grow their own food without needing magic dragon blessings to make the ground fertile.

... yeah. That's definitely going to work.

FE15 took the Kaga lesson to try to hammer some "humanity fuck yeah!" Square JRPG message and it completely messed up what FE2 tried to say.

(I confess, retconning Duma'n'Mila in dragon gods like Naga from Archanea was a big part in this shitstorm - that was also retconned to explain Grima from FE13! - i mean Duma'n'Mila have to die because they're degenerating, but they didn't get the memo from Gotoh living overseas that degeneration can be stopped by using dragonstones, instead of being a fatality that must be dealt with death...)

Humans cannot be held responsible for what they did, everything BaD that happened is somehow due to the influence of dragon-gods : even if it means "suffering" and sacrificing a part of your population, this choice is a good one to get rid of the obviously nefarious influence of dragon-gods.

So, is it so surprising that FE16 - the most popular title in the franchise uwu - went in the same direction?

Even if it tried to mitigate the "gods BaD" spiel because the avatar - Billy - is the Goddess reborn, the thing is the CoS - aka the dragon - is blamed for humanity's mistakes through each route (AM dodges the question completely) and all routes end up with the dragon going away (her skull being cracked open, or she retires, or she dies off-screen, or she dies because the plot commands so unless you want, as the player, to shag her).

"But in VW, Claude reconsiders his initial stance!"

And yet, it is only off-screen that he seemingly becomes aware that Fodlan people are not superpals with Almyra because Almyra raids them, not because Rhea told them Almyrans are BaD, that's why he tries to negotiate - off-screen and post-game - some sort of ceasefire between the two parties, or at least make it so Almyra doesn't try to raid Fodlan every Thursday for their weekly dick measuring contest.

No matter the ending, Rhea retires and in the worst support, muses on her failings for "having turned a blind eye" to Fodlan and its people in her quest to resurrect Sothis : aka, Rhea (and the game, since Billy doesn't tell her anything) believes Fodlan's state is due to her inaction and not, you know, the action of the humans who lived in the continent and ruined it of their own volition.

Which is also what fuels the endless discourse about what kind of power she has - or not : Rhea BaD for using her power, but also BaD for not using it and letting humans to their own devices.

Supreme Leader's memetastic line from the trailers ring even more true : in Fodlan, Crusts are to blame for everything. For Adrestian being attracted to young women because otherwise without crests they surely wouldn't seek to bed a 12 years old Doro, for Miklan trying to murder his younger brother (and not because, at least FE16 wise, Miklan is a terrible person who is very jealous and not afraid to kill even a child to get what he feels like he deserves), and for people basically killing their wives/letting their daughters die to get a "suitable" heir.

Humanity/Humans can get a pass for doing horrible things (Berkut burning his fiancée alive) because those horrible things can sort of be linked to "dragon-gods", and so, the blame exclusively lays at their feet.

I am always reminded of that Obi-Wan reply to Anakin when Ani accuses him of having turned Padmé "against" him, Obi-Wan basically tells him he brought this upon himself.

Now, what would Obi-Wan tell a non-recruited Doro who blames the Goddess for the War, the leader she is actually protecting, started?

Billy is no Obi-Wan, so we are left in this limbo where characters are telling you everything wrong that happens in Fodlan is due to "dragon blood" aka their existence and presence, even dragons who blame themselves for "being blind" - but not once do we have the Kaga message, or an Obi-Wan reminding people that they have to take responsability for their own actions : Hanneman will blame crests (dragons) for having killed his sister, but not the man who forced her (marital abuse?) to bear him many heirs until one was "good enough" for him.

Claude blames dragons for creating, both literal and metaphorical walls between Fodlan and Almyra - and it's only in his best ending, after the game credits and off-screen that he seems to realise that those walls were built by Almyrans raiders.

"enough about the fodlan rant, what about jugdral?"

Jugdral was sort of unique for not having a giant eldritch abomination as a boss, unlike the later FE8, we never fight Loptyr in his "original" form, Loptyr is fought through his host, Julius.

And I love Jugdral because unlike Fodlan, the local evil death cult might stage a few skirmishes and manipulations here and there, but Jugdral people are... asses, in general.

Elliot will mount an army to seduce Raquie while Eldie is away - and it's not because Manfroy told him to seduce her, no, Elliot does it from his own will.

Reptor'n'Langobalt'n'Andrei rebel against Kurth and Azmur? Sure, Arvis is pulling some of their strings, but Reptor'n'Langobalt are ambitious, even without Manfroy whispering anything.

Arvis pulls out his gambit... with Manfroy's help (and blackmail?), but also because he genuinely thinks he can sacrifice lives to make HIS world a reality because HE has great ideas about how the world should be and will torch anyone who opposes him.

F!Lewyn, as much as I dislike the character, reminds the cast that while Travant's actions might seem justified to him and to the Thracian people, he is still a man who assaulted a bunch of randoms + non-combattants in a desert, amushed them and slaughtered them : no matter his reasons and how justified he was, Travant is still a criminal to Jugdral people.

In Jugdral, people do things and have to take responsability for it - Oldvis basically dies after losing everything he had - by Seliph's hand (and with his own participation!!) because Oldvis has to take responsability for what he did in Barhara. Ditto for Travant, who accepts to die if it means the peninsula will be united (tfw his son doesn't understand what he meant !).

Dragon blood and Dragon people are never blamed for the shitty state Jugdral is in in the 1st or even 2nd gen, if Danan turned Isaach in giant brothel, it's not Julius-Loptyr who asked him to do so, nor Manfroy.

At least, that was the case for the pre FE15/FEH/FE16 Jugdral.

Now...

While I want to blame FE16 for this shift, I know the roots are more ancient (FE15?), IS's writing seems to favour a certain narrative, aka people having sad and or complicated fates because of their brands and Holy Blood - when the ONLY case of having a fate tied to Holy Blood was the Curse of the Gae Bolg, aka a sibling quarrel between Dain and Noba that will eventually "curse" Noba descendants, but through the events of the game we know that curse is more like a prophecy : Quan doesn't die because he had Noba Holy Blood, Quan dies because Travant kills him in Yied. Why Travant kills him? FE5 reveals Quan and his forefathers are basically letting Thracians starve and refuse to "give" them arable lands, or even export food.

Now, did Travant kill Quan because Quan had major Noba Holy Blood, or because Quan (and his forefather)'s policies made Thracians so desperate that their king feels like he has to resort to murder to "save" his people?

The issue is more complicated than "he has Noba HB so I had to kill him".

Come FEH and we had, in 2018 (before FE16 but after FE15) this :

My blood has granted me gifts, it's true. I have expended every effort to be worthy of those gifts. That same blood makes it impossible for me to live a peaceful life. That's a lesson I learned from my mother...

Now, even if I was dissecting and hc'ing and posting about Saias a lot for 5 years, I fully understand Saias is a character with maybe 20 lines in FE5, so you can only dissect the script and theorise and read between invisible lines to get something about the character.

But this?

It might be a reference to Cowen's last words who basically tells him his job is to "pass on" his Fjalar HB, and how having major Fjalar HB was the reason why Manfroy tried to kill him when he was younger (his mother Aida died to protect him).

And yet, FEH here seems to imply Aida died because Saias had Fjalar HB, and not, y'know, died because Manfroy wanted to kill him due to this HB.

It wasn't HB who killed Aida, but Manfroy!

FE5 never reveals why - but if Fjalar HB was the reason why Manfroy targeted Saias, then why the fuck wasn't Oldvis iced earlier, since he has the same brand and blood?

In a way, Saias blaming HB here as the "reason" why his mother died and why he cannot live a "peaceful life" is similar to a Leif who would blame Quan'n'Ethlyn for being the reason why Travant and the Empire were after his life : what is to blame, their "blood" that makes people want to kill them, or the fuckers who want to kill them?

Granted those lines from FEH completely miss the point of Saias as a character - FE5!wise Saias is in a class that cannot use fire magic, when his HB automatically gives him the highest rank in fire magic, and he is funnily enough the only character who "retreats" in his death quote -> Saias doesn't "expend" every effort to be worthy of HB, he hides and doesn't use the abilities given by said HB!

We can say, mkay, this was just FEH trying to fit their "gods and their influence BaD" narrative and missing the real culprits, aka humans themselves (Manfroy is one!) - from FE15 - in Jugdral, even if it meant retconning a character no one cares about.

But then, last year, we had Galzus' FB :

You speak of the blood of the Sword Saint Od. Perhaps. Is that the reason you have been set on a path of violence and bloodshed?

Nyx says Galzus' "curse" isn't tied to his HB, but it's basically his regret at not having been able to save his daughter.

So far, it's completely the inverse of what I decried, so this was a good FB, right?

:)

There is no doubt that the blood within you compels you to lead a cruel life. However, the loss of your daughter was the wedge that split your life into pieces and let the curse in.

Damn it Nyx, why???

Why Galzus's brand "compels him" to lead a cruel life - when it was just established that Galzus fell to despair and became a mercenary who kills for money after the loss of his daughter?

Before losing Mareeta, Galzus, at least per this FB, wasn't killing people right and left as the merc he now is (or was in FE5).

Now, much like Saias...

Why was Galzus left to roam around Jugdral with a toddler to begin with?

I had a daughter. When my wife died, I brought my daughter with me as I traveled around Jugdral.

This FB establishes that Galzus settled with Mareeta's biomom for a while, but when she died he "traveled around". Why Galzus couldn't return "home" and had to "travel around"?

You know the Ribaut family was devastated by our own House Isaach.

Timeline wise : Ribaut is already demolished during the prologue of FE4, and Mareeta is no older than Leif himself, which means she was born after Galzus' grandfather and Ayra's brother, aka, his uncle, beheaded his dad and demolished his kingdom. Galzus, in exile, had Mareeta, and then had to "travel around" Jugdral because his home had already been demolished by "House Isaach" -

Note how Ayra talks about the Ribaut (i prefer rivough but meh) family when she talks about her very own sister - Galzus' mother. Jugdral family trees being what they are, Shanan, Larcei, Scatach and Galzus are actually cousins, Galzus is Ayra's own nephew, just like Shanan!

Anyways, in FE4, the reason given behind Ribaut's destruction is their attack on Darna, so the Isaachian royals killed them.

Galzus' "cruel life" wasn't compelled by his HB, Galzus' life took a turn for the worst when his Uncle and Grandpa knocked at his door and slaughtered his entire family, destroying their Kingdom.

So why FEH tried to fit his backstory in some sort of "dragon blood is to blame" Fodlan narrative?? They at least acknowledge the bad blood (lel) between Isaach's royal family and Ribaut's, hell, Ayra even wants to say Mareeta is a part of Isaach's royal family in her FB with her son, so it's not to whitewash the Isaachian royal family because their units are more popular and would sell more...

Contrary to Saias, Galzus's writing and his FB seem to have been made by people who cared and didn't completely ignore what the character was about so... why this emphasis on his HB ??

Are we bound in post FE16 releases to have, at least with the current writing team, the excuse of "dragon blood is to blame" ? Galzus cannot blame the Isaachian Royal Family or even the slavers for his (and his daugher's!) fate, but he can blame his HB, aka, a non-entity?

Will HB be now used as a "responsibility free" card, because the fate a character suffers or their actions are only tied to said HB? Arvis will get a pass because his HB compelled him to save the world (tfw Victor prefered to "seduce" women instead), Lewyn will be lightly chided by his mom instead of receiving the beatdown he has in FE4 because his HB now makes him unable to stay in place? Ditto for Ced, Karin won't chew him out for abandoning his mother and sister because his HB compelled him to travel around, so in the end, dragons are to blame for him abandoning his sister and mother?

That's what I'm the most afraid in future Jugdral remakes, that had humans characters with human flaws in a crapsack/shitty verse, the insertion in a future remake of a very Squenix "but aksuhally gods and church bad" when Jugdral is the pinnacle of "the world sucks because people living in this world suck". No need for secret sects manipulating everything in the shadows like FE16's Agarthans, Chagall is a horrible person without needing Manfroy's help, and Hilda will not say "Holy Blood is to blame" when she tortures Tailte to death.

When Tailte is caught and Hilda'd, it's because she participated (or even commited) in parricide, and because her camp/army lost the battle. She doesn't die because of her HB, she dies because Hilda kills her, most likely, for having killed Reptor (Hilda wants to avenge her "father" when fought, i'm pretty sure she means her father in law aka Reptor!).

As befits a game called "Genealogy of the Holy War", people aren't targeted because of their HB, but they are targeted because they are part of a genealogy - see the Leif comparison earlier on : Leif is hunted because he is Quan's son, even if he doesn't have Noba major blood. Seliph is hunted because he is Siggy'n'Deedee's son, not because of his Baldo HB.

In FE4, Manfroy tells Julius Arvis was a thorn at their side because "Fjalar's ways" ran too strong in him - implying he had some moral fiber that would make him oppose the return of Loptyr (but those same "ways" didn't prevent him from torching his own brother and conquering the world...) - I will have to check the translation and og script, but was Saias targeted because he had Fjalar HB, or because he could develop the same moral fiber Arvis does in his later years, or just, because he is Arvis's son? Cowen seems to suggest it is FB, but we know Fjalar HB cannot harm Loptyr so... what was the true reason?

Blaming dragon-gods reduces the complexity of Jugdral's setting and characters - and in a post FEH world where tropes win character contests and sell a lot of alts if they are flanderised enough + a post FE15/16 world where characters, to be likeable enough, have to ditch their responsibilities or at least have the plot elude them to pin them instead on vague and non-important (gacha wise) gods, what is going to happen to Jugdral?

Fanfics are fanfics and people are free to write whatever they want - but I wonder (especially after Nopes and the plethora of 'golden endings' fics that ended up with the CoS as the big bad lol) if fics where Mareeta and Ced blaming their HB for their various hardships is going to become the new canon...

I seriously hope it will never, and it if happens then...

I guess I'll still yell at cloud and nerd about the 1990s versions of those games, completely ignoring the new releases (save for maybe updated artwork).

Tl;Dr : FEH makes me afraid Judgral remakes will borrow the "humanity fuck yeah" page from FE15 and FE16 and put the blame of Jugdral's shitty situation from Jugdralians to... Holy Blood and "dragon-gods", completely missing and rewritting the point of those games. IS already said "fig" to Kaga once or thrice, but this might become the most contentious "fig" they ever give him if they decided to write a Jugdral remake this way.

#rant #heroes salt #fe series salt #at least the few last games #FE17 is a breath of fresh air #will it become the new standard or will we have more and more shit like those FBs? #jugdral stuff #at this point i'm afraid of that fandom syndrome #where you put much more thoughts and love and care about a setting than its own authors #so when said authors develop it you're disappointed #because you feel like it's a downgrade to what it was before #like star wars maybe? #i'm very worried about the writing of future games especially since the faux issues raised in Fodlan games apparently #made people want more writting as consistent as pudding #as long as has a veneer of being solid and realistic

[ryo-maybe]

can u explain why AI art is bad without fearmongering, moralizing or bootlicking lol

I'm going to answer in good faith, even though the tone you're using sounds like you're harboring anything but. The issue with AI art isn't specifically inherent to the tools used to produce it, because, ultimately, a tool is merely that: something devoid of will which, in the hands of a human, can produce a specific outcome. It's the human element that taints what we could otherwise enjoy for the unquestioningly fascinating topic that is AI art and, by extension, AI software as a whole.

Now, the problem isn't people, period, but the kind of people that are responsible for giving AI the bad rep it's been getting, along with the intent that goes into both the development of AI tools and the things produced by dint of said tools. I'm talking about the tech bros happily rubbing their hands, waiting to provide business moguls with a brand new means to commodify and mass-produce what artists stake their entire livelihoods upon, because when you have enough zeroes lined up in your bank account, your eyes are utterly blinded to the soul and personality that human beings put into their handiwork, and which a machine won't ever be able to reproduce no matter how much stolen art you feed it. Oh yeah, by the way, that's how AI art tools have been making the rounds: by chewing on thousands upon thousands of stolen pictures made by actual people so that they may learn how to ape someone's style and spit out absolutely soulless derivatives, while the original authors don't see a lick of recognition or monetary retribution for any of it. Do I need to tell you why stealing and parading someone else's art as your own is a terrible, vile thing to do?

But sure, you did ask me to refrain from "fearmongering, moralizing or bootlicking", which I guess I've already done. So since you'd rather I skipped straight to the point in a concise manner, lemme offer some quick examples of why the culture surrounding AI art has already developed into one of the most abysmally disappointing displays of how greed and an utter lack of human decency can ruin something objectively brimming with possibilities:

Less than a week after the sudden death of Korean artist Kim Jung-gi, someone trained an AI model to mimic his artstyle, having the audacity of asking for credits if anyone wished to use it. I sincerely hope I don't have to explain to you why this is a ghoulish example of the kind of tone-deafness sported by tech bros who buy wholesale into the AI art craze.

A piece of AI art was submitted to an art contest and won. The "artist"'s work amounted to little more than picking a series of prompts and letting the machine do the work. It's as much art as googling a smattering of terms and making a collage of pictures taken from Pinterest (and even then, you would have put more work into it than this person did). That they won at all says a whole damn lot about how abysmal the respect given to artists - real artists - nowadays is.

There are a multitude of people out there already selling prints of AI-generated art. I could link some of them here, but honestly, type "ai art prints" on a search engine and you'll get inundated by them. I've seen and personally know artists who have had to undersell their works because commissions were the only thin, frayed string they could hang on in hopes of making it through the week without fucking starving themselves, but here we are: any random asshole can now yell "MASSIVE BREASTS, THIN WAIST, COCKTAIL DRESS, HUGE BADONGAS" at a computer, let it mash together a trillion of other people's hard work, and print it for easy bucks that the actual authors of the basic ingredients of their insipid soup will never, ever see a dime of.

It really bothers me that you mentioned "no bootlicking". Whose fucking boots is this side of the debate supposedly tasting? That of the artists who post every day about how angry, sad and terrified they are by the prospects of what the development of AI art will entail for their livelihood and passion? What kind of gall did your mother birth you with that you have the spiteful spunk to type that word, when you've got shit like an artist who had their sketch stolen while they were drawing it on stream, then fed to an AI and posted by someone passing it off as their own art? How does that not ignite your indignation? "Bootlicking". Like anyone's tongues have been tasting leather but those of the same tech bro chodes who kept trying oh so hard to convince us NFTs were the future while ruining the environment to make the absolute stupidest point ever made in the history of humanity.

[jjongslutz]

이희승 HEESEUNG 💋 911! I'VE BEEN A BAD GIRL [ MDNI. ]

IN WHICH there's nothing hotter than a man in a cop uniform. there's nothing more sexually frustrating than when he's never at home in said cop uniform

WARNINGS ⨯ fem!reader, cop kink (?), Men In Uniforms, hard dom!heeseung x brat!reader, spanking (flogger & hand), orgasm denial, handcuffs, use of pet names & name calling (bunny, doll, baby, slut, whore), sex toys (dildo, vibrator)

WORD COUNT ⨯ 2.9k

AUTHOR'S NOTE . . . this stems from that one trend where ppl stand next to cops to that one lana del rey song lolz 🙏

"911, what's your emergency?"

You smirk as you hear the familiar voice spill through the phone.

"Oh, officer, I'm in big trouble." Your hand traces the black lace barely covering your skin rhythmically with your words.

"Alright, can you explain your situation to me?"

You put on your best impression of an innocent doll from a 60s movie. “Oh, officer…” You let your voice trail off, wrapping your hair around your finger. “I’ve been a bad girl.”

The man on the other end of the line hesitates. He recognizes your voice. You smirk. “Y/N.” His voice is stronger than before, but has no telling emotion. You sit quietly. “

“I miss you so much,” you whine. Simultaneously, your fingers find their way past your black lingerie, fingering lightly at your clit. You moan into the line.

Heeseung tuts. You hear shuffling from the other side before he comes back to the phone. “Don’t fucking touch yourself until I get home.” Then, more quietly, but with a hint of mischief. “Don’t be a dumb slut and get off while I’m not there. Or I’ll make you regret it.”

Heat flushes throughout your body, spreading to your fingertips simply resting against your cunt. You retract them in fear and excitement of what he’s planning to do with you.

After a few moments, you hum lamely, and the line clicks shut.

Now, all there is to do is wait.

You get to the bedroom and it proves to be more difficult than you thought as heat rushes to your core. Heeseung’s scent lingers in the air from before he left, the sheets feeling the ghost of his warmth, even though you know that’s just in your mind.

Lying down against the mattress, you spread your arms to feel the soft material tickle your skin. You turn to touch your cheek against the blanket, but your eye catches onto a silver glint coming from the closet.

Your eyes widen when you creep up to it, realizing Heeseung went shopping without your knowing.

A bright pink dildo stands tauntingly still in its box. It doesn't take much for you to shut down any internal debates before ripping it out of its confinement and getting yourself settled with it on the bed again.

You lather a generous amount of lube on the toy, stopping yourself from drooling at the size of it. With one hand, you force your legs apart while the other guides the dildo to your needy hole.

The stretch feels so good that you let yourself soak in it for a moment, feeling how deeply it goes into you. It touches everywhere you need it most and more, you're certain you could cum just from this. But you won't limit yourself.

You start pushing it in and out, soon enough developing a rhythm that you meet with your rolling hips.

It feels so good you don't even hear the click of the door unlocking, nor the footsteps which follow it all the way to the bedroom.

“Oh, bunny,” Heeseung says with a teasingly disappointed tone. “You couldn’t wait until I got home?”

His voice makes you instinctively close your legs, a poor attempt at hiding what you're doing despite a part in you deep down wishing for him to see it all. In the movement, the dildo slips from your hands and lands somewhere on the mattress where Heeseung can clearly see it. His eyes darken.

“Found your present early, didn't you, bunny?” You whimper at his taunts, but force yourself to nod confidently.

You whine. “You’re always away, sir…” Putting on your best doe eyes, you try to ignore the effect Heeseung’s hard gaze has on your core, making your insides twitch. “Don’t you want me to feel good when you're gone?”

Suddenly, Heeseung crawls up to you onto the bed and sinks two fingers into your wet hole. You gasp at the intrusion. “This—” He emphasizes it by curling his fingers. “—belongs to me. I make you feel good. Not some stupid toy.”

Nodding weakly, you resist the urge to moan dejectedly as he slips his hand out.

“Fucking slut,” he mutters. “Couldn't even wait until I get changed?”

You can’t help the whimper that escapes you.

Heeseung notices it, too. His lips curl into a menacing smirk, his eyes gleaming with passion at the idea that sparks in his mind. “Oh… does my pretty little slut like my uniform?”

You nod, but he doesn't take it.

“Use your words.”

“Yes, sir.”

His hand reaches into his belt compartment. “Maybe I should put it to good use then. Wouldn't you like that bunny?” He pulls out a silver pair of handcuffs, with a click! they open invitingly. “Put your hands behind your back, whore.”

As much as your pussy begs for you to listen to him, make this all go faster, you stop yourself. You want to have some fun. “No.”

Heeseung raises a brow. “No?”

“No.” You shake your head to stand your ground. Then, more teasingly, “No, sir.”

Your boyfriend lets out a venomous laugh, his tongue running over his bottom lip before he bites it. His eyes make you fear he’s going to pounce on you, but excite you in hopes that he actually will.

“I said,” he clarifies, stepping onto the bed again, hovering over your body. “Put your hands—” He grabs both wrists into one hand and pulls them up and over your head. “—behind your back.” You squeal as he uses his grip as leverage to toss you over, rolling you onto your stomach. Heeseung pulls your arms down and clicks the handcuffs shut around them. “You naughty little slut.”

Your face is buried in the mattress, and he makes sure of it by the way he shoves it down to make you focus on the feeling of his hand tracing your waistline. “I’m sorry, sir,” you attempt.

He tuts. “You’ll show me how fucking sorry you are.”

You know what that’s code for. The way he fumbles around in the bedside drawer is just further confirmation. Your ears perk up at the sound of him pulling out the flogger.

He runs the toy through his fingers, then traces your back with it. You flinch when he suddenly puts two fingers under the hand of your lace bra and snaps it against your skin. “You have the right to remain silent.” Heeseung leans to your ear, whispering in a breathy tone which tickles your skin. He pulls at your head to lift your face to his. “I’m going to spank you ten times, okay? And you aren't going to make a single noise. Every time you do, that’s another two. Got it?”

The flogger dances over your lace-panties and the skin exposed below it, a shiver running down your spine at the contact. You conceal a yelp when the first slap comes crashing.

“That’s one,” Heeseung announces.

Slap! “Two.”

“Three—” And another. “Four.”

You can already feel your skin reddening from where the toy hit you. It hurts so good. You wish more than anything you could tell him, but you bite your lip to keep from it.

That proves to not be enough when he suddenly switches from the soft but stinging flogger to direct and harsh contact from his hand.

“Ah—” The sound escapes before you can realize it's coming out. You try to cover your mouth, only to remember your hands are tied behind your back, so it’s nothing but a pathetic attempt.

Heeseung squeezes the skin he just slap, pinching at it. “Stupid slut can’t stay quiet?” He slaps once, then twice, quickly. It stings and weak breathes get caught in your throat. Thankfully, he doesn't focus on those. “Six. Seven,” he calls them. “Five more ‘cause you’re a whore who can't keep her mouth shut like I asked her to.”

You’re able to resist making any more after that, biting down so hard on your lip you’re surprised it's still intact. Not that you think you or Heeseung would mind.

“Twelve.” Heeseung rubs circles on the reddened skin, your body twitching sensitively underneath his touch. After setting aside the flogger, he crawls back up your body to lean and whisper against your ear. His thumb wipes across your cheek and you only realize then that you started crying. “Pretty.”

A shiver runs down your spine as Heeseung’s warm hands make their way to your thighs, spreading them apart for full access. You flush at the feeling of your hole desperately clenching on nothing.

Heeseung laughs. “Does my whore miss my cock?” he teases. “Show me how much you want my cock stuffing you full, bunny.”

“Please, sir!” You put on the niceties in hopes of helping your case. “I need it so bad, sir.”

It doesn't do much.

Instead of hearing the sweet sound of him unzipping his pants, Heeseung shuffles with your panties and pulls them off. Then, he reaches to your other side and grabs the dildo you discarded earlier.

He circles the you around your sopping hole to lather it up, before pushing it in without warning. Without time to adjust, either, Heeseung starts pulling it in and out of your pussy in a rhythmic pattern.

You can barely let out breaths at his speed, forced to moan with every thrust of the toy. It touches everywhere it did before, but infinitely better now that Heeseung’s controlling it. You want to stay like this forever and be right over the edge of coming undone under his touch.

The warmth you’re so familiar with and aching for burns from inside you and Heeseung can clearly sense it. He smirks behind you, placing his hand on the small of your back.

“You wanna cum?”

“Yes, sir,” you whimper between breaths.

He’s not satisfied. “What was that?”

“Yes, sir!” you say louder, breaking out into a moan as he pushes the dildo deeper, hitting your g-spot head on. “Please sir, please sir!”

“Since you asked so nicely,” he replies. You prepare to ride your high, but all of the pleasure is ripped away from you when Heeseung pulls the toy completely out of you, placing it tauntingly on the nightstand by your left.

You start to whine, but he cuts you off.

“Don’t be a brat, I’m giving you what you want.” He tuts as he starts to undo your handcuffs. A wave of relief washes over you as you can finally relax your wrists. “You’ve been a very bad girl, Y/N, you’re lucky I’m not locking you up all night.”

In a moment, he flips you over and straddles your hips to redo the handcuffs once more. You’ve grown accustomed to the burn of the silver against your arms that you can't do more than let out a shallow breath as he pulls it through the headboard and safely attaches your arms. Slowly, wearing an intense gaze, Heeseung stands up and admires his work.

Finally, you get a proper look at him.

There’s nothing particular about his uniform, but he makes it look so good you want to rip it right off of him. His belt tightens around his waist just right, holding all kinds of tools and weapons he might need on the job. You bite your lip at the buttons undone at the base of his collar, exposing just enough skin to not leave much to the imagination. His badge shines against the light reflecting from the mirror, catching your eye in the light of it.

Heeseung smirks. “How do you want it, bunny?”

You forget to answer. The way his muscles stretch the fabric around his biceps has you breathing deeply, wishing you could bite down on them, or even have them around your neck.

“Bunny,” Heeseung says more firmly. “I asked you a question.”

Now, you’re playing into the way his deeper, stricter voice makes you feel. The power he holds over you makes your insides twist. You squirm under his hardened gaze.

“I’m sor—” Your eyes slip down his body subconsciously. His bulge is obvious through his tight pants.

“Oh?” Heeseung raises a brow teasingly and bends to meet your lowered eyes. When your gazes meet again, his lips curl upward. “You don’t want the toy anymore? You seemed pretty desperate, using it like the whore you are before I gifted it. Do you think you deserve my cock? Is that what you want, slut?”

You nod, dazed. “Yes…” He eyes you. “Sir."

He doesn't reach down to unzip his pants like you want. He makes his way across the room to the closet and pulls out another box you haven't seen before. Raising a brow, he shakes it for your focus.

“Another gift?” you test.

He hums cryptically, playing around with the tap and pulling out an unfamiliar device. “Comes pre-charged,” he says contently. He presses a button and the toy starts to buzz in his hand.

A vibrator. Oh no.

He puts it on the lowest setting before nudging it between your legs. “Spread your legs a little before I have to force them apart.”

Your legs slowly move away, but not fast enough for him. Heeseung harshly grabs onto your thigh and spreads them open. You’re embarrassed at the sight of your desperate cunt, most likely red in desire.

“Beautiful,” he whispers, leaning in to give it a gentle kiss before placing the torture device—vibrator—right onto your clit.

Thankfully, he gets up to unzip his pants next. He pulls them down just enough to let his hardened cock spring free. It’s leaking at the tip, a glistening glazed white that you want to wrap your mouth around and lap up with your tongue. You let out a breath, trying to hold yourself together and rip away from the headboard you're handcuffed to.

Heeseung strokes it twice or thrice, but doesn't waste time in crawling toward you and aligning it with your mouth. He taunts you, holding it just out of reach for you to wrap your lips around it, but close enough to paint your mouth with his pre-cum. You lap your tongue over his leak desperately.

He laughs above you before shoving it in without warning. “Fuck,” he groans, going for a harsh thrust. “So tight. You take me so well.”

Impatience laces his thrusts, sporadically hitting the back of your throat. You try to steady yourself, head spinning from the vibrations on your cunt, twisting your wrists to grip onto the headboard, your fingers brushing against Heeseung’s which use the bed frame for the same reason.

He huffs from above. “Were you made for this? Is that why you take me so good? Whore, fuck, so good.”

Rolling back your eyes, you mewl at his words, choking back on his cock, but Heeseung doesn't mind. His hand comes down from the headboard to grip the back of your head, forcing it forward to take you deeper.

“Shit, I’m not gonna last—” He groans and curses under his breath, speeding up his movements with no remorse. “You wanna taste my cum? Feel it down your throat? Is that what a slut like you wants?”

Inside. Inside. Come inside me! Your mind screams. You moan against his cock and furrow your brows at the feeling of it hitting your throat.

The vibrations send Heeseung over the edge, making him double over the headboard and let out a melodic groan as his seed spills out of your mouth. Your head follows his movements as he slips his dick out of your mouth, only stopping at the resistance from your hands still tied to the bed frame. You settle with focusing on his movements.

With one hand, Heeseung strokes his cock over your torso, milking himself dry, producing the most beautiful sounds. Your eyes flutter shut for a moment, but you force yourself to keep them open.

His other hand snakes down to the vibrator still comfortably nestled on your clit at an easy-to-take setting. He pumps it up two or three, you’re not sure, but it's enough to have your legs shaking and send you over the edge in seconds.

You moan out his name, your pussy soaking itself in your juices.

“Good girl,” Heeseung says, leaning in to give you a soft kiss on your forehead and reach up to undo the handcuffs. He places them safely on the side table and your wrists are finally able to breathe.

Still catching your actual breath, through dazed eyes, you take another look at Heeseung as he pulls up and redoes his pants. He lays down next to you, comfortably landing in your hold.

“You don't wear all of that when you’re just taking calls, do you?”

He looks away bashfully, as if a completely different person from the one pounding into you a few minutes ago. “No…” he says. “I thought you might like it—”

You cut him off with a kiss.

When you separate, you giggle, “I really like it.” Your hand glides down to his belt and hooks onto the buckle. “I really like it.”

He wiggles away from your hold. “Don’t start again, you won't be able to walk.”

“Maybe that's what I want.” Then, for extra measure, you add, “Sir.”

All he does is roll his eyes and playfully scoff at you as he gets up again. “Consider yourself lucky,” he says, retreating to the bathroom for a wet cloth to clean you up.

Or, to get the other toys you have stored in there.

You can only hope for the best.

 JJONGSLUTZ 2023

#💋 𐬹⠀꩜ written by sol #enhypen hard hours #enhypen smut #enhypen au #enhypen fic #enhypen #enhypen x reader #enhypen fanfic #enhypen imagines #enhypen heeseung #enhypen ff #enhypen hard thoughts #enhypen headcanons #enhypen hard headcanons #heeseung x yn #heeseung hard hours #heeseung x you #heeseung fic #lee heesung x reader #heeseung x reader #heeseung au #heeseung smut #heeseung imagines #heeseung #heeseung hard thoughts #heeseung headcanons #l.hs

[kzpearce]

distracted. alhaitham x reader

gender neutral reader (no pronouns are used). reader has an anemo vision, and this shot is more focused at haitham's point of view.

author's note. first time posting in tumblr! i'm on my writing slump recently, so i'll be using this platform to post a one-shot that would help me bring back on my track. take note that this would be my story dump, so there wouldn't be a so much effort to proofread this :,) however! it doesn't mean that i won't make any effort writing one-shots here. so enjoy <3

everybody knew that alhaitham was not someone who will get distracted easily while he was reading his book. a person could be talking to him and annoying him (for better or worse), but he could still managed to maintain his focus on whatever book he was reading.

just what spell did you give him? how did you manage to make him stop from reading the book he was deeply interested in?

the chilling breeze touched his delicate skin, and it made his hair move gracefully from its place. his eyes hastily diverted from his book, looking for you. perhaps because of your anemo vision—there were some circumstances that whenever you're entering into the scene, you unconsciously make the wind whisper. since he was too familiar with your presence, whenever you accidentally controlled the wind, he already knew that you're nearby.

sometimes, you accidentally made the wind blow at the wrong timing for the other people. and because of this, when your presence was felt, a scholar with piles of files blew away. alhaitham watched your eyes expand, and you quickly used your vision to lift the files and hang them on the air—just to avoid these papers to make contact with the ground or the water.

“i’m deeply sorry,” you frowned. you gathered these papers and placed them on the top of the scholar’s book.

“it’s alright, you prevented them from getting wet,” she chuckled, shaking her head.

you smiled—oh archons, you had no idea how he loved seeing the sweet grin carved in your lips. he would do anything just to maintain your smile on your lips. had he ever mentioned that you looked utterly beautiful today? most likely no. this would be the first time he saw you today. and he had no guts to tell you this too.

“hi,” your smile lingered on your lips. in fact, they widened when alhaitham slightly grinned. he didn’t notice that you were already in front of him.

you sat beside him without a warning. he didn’t mind. “done with today’s work?” you asked, not breaking a contact.

“still have a pile, but i’m on my break,” he retorted. he placed his bookmark at the desired page and closed his book. alhaitham wanted his eyes and focus to be on you. you didn’t ask him to, it was his intention and his own doing.

“oh, okay,” you unhurriedly nodded, thinking about what to suggest so that you could spend more time with him. “do you… want to eat something before you continue working?”

“i’m not hungry,” he declined. your lips made a thin line, disappointed that he managed to say no so quick. he was somehow expecting you to overthink. alhaitham knew you for quite some time now, and you developed a friendship that no one (neither the two of you) were expecting.

“oh, okay then. i’ll leave you alone so that you can continue reading.” you were about to stand up, yet he grasped your wrist swiftly. your head jerked to his hand, wrapping your wrist.

he saw your breath hitched. alhaitham knew that this action caught you off guard—and to be honest, this caught him off guard too. alhaitham never expected himself to act so impulsively in front of you. on the other hand, he knew that your mind was thinking negative thoughts, thus he should and would do anything that would stop you from getting away from his presence.

he waited for a day just to see and spend time with you. and he would never let you go until he’s satisfied and ready to spend his time dealing with papers again.

“i didn’t ask you to leave,” he said. his eyes never left yours, and he managed to read something from them. it was hope. “stay.” it was more a demand and not a request.

alhaitham observed that you tried to stop your lips from smiling. your cheeks reddened as he pulled you back to your sit—not just to your sit, he pulled you close too.

his hands moved from your wrist to your hands. and he had an urge to intertwine them. you obliged, and your grin widened. “i see. perhaps with me in your presence would help you more to rest, huh?” you joked.

“yeah, it will.”

you plump cheeks were redder. and he couldn’t stop staring at them. alhaitham admired you (perhaps admired would be underwhelming for him), and he didn’t want to take his eyes away from you. he wanted to stare at you without being interrupted. perhaps some would call him a freak, yet he didn’t care. it was the least thing he care about the moment.

at this point, if someone would ask if he would rather pick the book he was deeply interested in or to spend time with you (not to mention, staring at you too), he would not hesitate to choose you.

#genshin impact #alhaitham x reader #genshin impact fluff #genshin fluff #al haitham x reader #gender neutral reader #genshin various men #genshin impact alhaitham #fluff #fanfiction #alhaitham x you #alhaitham x y/n #alhaitham #genshin impact x reader #kzpearce3

[violetsiren90]

All I Haven't Said | Namjoon/Reader

Table of Contents: Chapter 1; Chapter 2; Chapter 3 (part 1), Chapter 3 (part 2)

Pairing: idol!Namjoon/f!Reader

Genre: Soulmate AU; idol AU; chapter fic; strangers to lovers; a bit of idiots to lovers, tbh; slow burn; eventual romance; eventual smut; angst (life is messy & hearts are complex); OT7 featured

Summary: You found your soulmate - or rather, he found you. Turns out he's an idol of much acclaim who needs you for very real and unglamorous reasons. What could become of two hearts so used to giving of themselves when they are confronted with needing each other?

Warnings: 18+ (minors, dni), realistic depictions of cancer and cancer treatment; mention of unfeatured character death (previous to plot); emotional health growth and development; eventual smut; feelings and dealing with feelings (no, but seriously, so many feelings)

Author's Note: First and foremost - Blame Me chapter 1 will still be tentatively dropping by the end of the week. However, this just literally wrote itself last night after a couple of drinks and several streams of Lonely 💔. It was the thing that just poured out of me and could not be stopped. It's been simmering in the back of my brain for a while, and so, now that it's out here, I'm going to be posting it in tandem with Blame Me, probably on alternate weeks (if I can manage it, 😅). I want to give credit to those whose works I have read which have come to set the stage for my concept of the soulmate au, and who are far my betters in creative artistry: Matchy, author of balls-to-the-walls masterpiece Trip No Further, Fallencairns, author of lovely work of art Turbulence, and @teenagebountyhunter , to whom I dedicate this work 💜 the author of the ineffably beautiful Namjoon soulmate fic Bloom (RUN to read this immediately) - the inspiration for what is to humbly follow below. If you're checking this out, thanks a million for reading, and please don't be shy in offering feedback should you be so inclined! (Baby fic writer here, constructive criticism always welcome!)

Without further ado, chapter one is under the cut.

P.S. Tag list is open. If you want in, let me know. 😊

P.P.S. In case no one has told you today, you're loved and worthy of love. 🧜💜

“When your hands leap towards mine, love, what do they bring me in flight? Why did they stop at my lips, so suddenly, why do I know them, as if once before, I have touched them, as if, before being, they traveled my forehead, my waist?”

~ Pablo Neruda

Chapter 1: The Cure

Diana dipped another three fries in ketchup and popped them into her mouth.

"So, what do you need to talk about that has you desperate enough to buy me lunch?" She smiled smugly and sipped and her milkshake.

You hadn't touched the burger in front of you, even if you probably should be absolutely relishing in it, considering your future prospects. You picked up a sweet potato fry and stared at it absently.

"I found my soulmate," you stated flatly.

Diana's jaw dropped mid-chew, unpleasantly framing the masticated remains of a mouthful of turkey club.

"Wait, are you serious?" she pressed, round hazel eyes wide and unblinking.

You dipped the fry down into the little cup of ranch and swirled it around slowly.

"Actually, he found me. Well, his people found me," you continued. 

"Huh? So is he some kind of a big deal - wait...they found you? What does that even mean? Wait, no - you have a soulmate?!"

You smiled ruefully. It was kind of nice to see someone else freaking out about it for a change. You had known your little sister would react strongly, which is why you had waited until now give her the news.

"Y/n, ANSWERS," Diana demanded leaning forward to flick your forehead. 

"Ow!" you protested, rubbing the throbbing spot on your brow. "Keep your pants on, geez!"

You sighed. After having relayed this story to your mom, your doctor, a specialist, legal advisory, your best friend, your brother and his wife, and your very disappointed boss, you had gotten pretty good telling it. Yet, somehow, each time the burden of it's truth felt a little heavier. You ate the fry. It was pretty good. You wished it had sucked so it wouldn't be one more edible thing you missed the prospect of.

"So apparently, a couple of years ago a university in Switzerland found a way to match soulmates using DNA testing. Don't ask me about the exact science of it - I do not understand it. What I do know is that it's illegal to use this technology to locate your soulmate in the US."

"Why?" Diana had abandoned her food and was listening with rapt attention.

"Something about privacy rights. Though they've dealt with that issue in Switzerland - people interested in finding their soulmates join a biological registry. I'm sure our government is just waiting to find a way that big pharma can exploit it before they facilitate the process. Anyway, somehow, I ended up in a foreign registry. I guess there is a black market for soulmate data..."

"Oh my god, could I be on the black market?" Diana gasped, slapping her hands over her mouth.

"I guess anyone could, provided they've ever been treated at a hospital, or given blood, or anything of the sort...but calm down! It doesn't even matter unless you have a match, which is rare."

"So he found you on the black market?! That's so fucking sketchy, Y/n."

"It was his company, actually. I got a visit from representatives of an organization called Hybe. They are some kind of South Korean entertainment conglomerate. One of their employees, a musician, is dying of cancer. Seeing if he had a soulmate was a last-ditch effort to save his life. Now everything is banking on me and my cooperation."

You flicked your eyes up to your sister. Her expression had morphed into something far more somber.

"Heavy..." she whispered.

You nodded.

"What are you gonna do?"

You took a bite of your burger. She wasn't going to like your answer. Diana's face changed again, this time registering alarm and indignation.

"No," she murmured, "No, Y/n. You're just gonna do it, aren't you? You're gonna go be the fucking hero! You're going to traipse off to Korea and save his sketchy, ungrateful ass!"

She stood up, her chair screeching back over the concrete and drawing the attention of other diners on the patio. You glanced around apologetically.

"Diana, sit down! And how do you know if he's grateful or not?!" you hissed.

"No!" she countered defiantly, yanking her hand away from where you had reached for it. "You always do this! You never, ever think of yourself. And now you'll be gone forever...is this even safe?"

Tears had started to well up in her eyes, and the glances around you had turned into stares and whispers. You stood up and pulled her into a hug.

"Hey, hey, it's okay! Lets get out of here and I can answer all of your questions, alright?" She sniffled.

"Okay. But you're not leaving me." You smiled and huffed out a laugh pulling her toward the parking lot.

You had anticipated that Diana would disapprove of your decision, and it being as difficult a situation as it was, you had decided to make all the arrangements and choices necessary before telling her. She loved you so fiercely, she would have watched the world burn before letting you break a nail, if she could help it.

After your father's death nearly twenty years ago, you had become protector and provider to Diana and your younger brother Henry, three years her senior, in ways your sensitive and unworldly mother seemed unequipped to shoulder. If they had both not been so established and secure in the trajectory of their adult lives, you would have made it clear to Hybe that you regrettably had nonnegotiable responsibilities right where you were. But Henry was settled into a suburb with a lovely wife and year-old daughter, Diana was set to finish undergrad and head off to nursing school, and the deal with Hybe had actually allowed you to leverage for your Mom's retirement, so you were boarding a flight to Korea next week to take on a new set of cares and concerns.

You tossed your keys on the table on your way into your apartment and collapsed onto your comfy red couch. While Diana rooted around your fridge and loudly complained about the lack of hard seltzer, you sorted through the mail and made a mental note to add a forwarding address on a few of your accounts and subscriptions, including the one supplying you with Nightwing comics. You set the mail aside and took a moment to look around you.

You loved your little apartment. The kitchen was small, but the big window with the spider plant hanging in it made it one of your favorite rooms - the herb garden on the counter and the fully stocked bar above the fridge did nothing to make you like it any less. The earthy brown walls of the living space were littered with shelves full of candles and living plants and quirky curios, and in and amongst them hung framed watercolors of flowers and herbs that you had painted yourself. The record player sat at the ready in the corner by the wall dedicated almost exclusively to books and vinyl. There was a small tv over the stone-lined fireplace. Over your shoulder your soft, queen sized bed with sheer canopy cozily called your named from the single bedroom. 

The whole place smelled like citrus and cinnamon. In every corner, there was you. It was going to be hard to leave the hobbit hole you had so lovingly curated for yourself over the last half-a-decade...especially since you wouldn't be going "there and back again", but just...there.

Diana plopped down next to you,  breaking your reverie.

"So, you're NOT going, but tell me about the huge mistake you ALMOST made," Diana prompted as she side-eyed you, taking a sip of the wine she had poured herself.

You set the comic book you had been thumbing through aside and drew your knees up to your chest as you swiveled to face her impatient stare.

"Last week, a these three people showed up at my door, two men and a woman, and they said they were from a company called Hybe based in South Korea. One of their employees, a singer named Kim Namjoon, has stage 4 liver cancer. I guess they caught it pretty late in the game, so even the most aggressive treatments aren't doing much good. Back in April the doctor gave him two months to live."

"Damn," Diana interjected softly.

"Yeah, that's why all of this is happening so fast. He needs me as soon as I can get there."

"We need you, too," she whispered, reaching out to loop her finger into the top of your sock. You smiled affectionately.

"I know, Di, but you're a grown woman now and you can take care of yourself. You're going to have to and I know you can. Life really won't be that different - you'll be off to school in San Diego anyway! Most of our hangouts were going to be over Facetime...now you'll just have an excuse for a little international travel."

She heaved a stuttering sigh.

"Speaking of travel...Johnny broke up with me," she mumbled.

Your mouth hung open in shock.

"Oh my god, Di, I'm so sorry! Why didn't you tell me?"

She downed her remaining wine and stared into the empty glass, twirling it between her fingers.

"I was gonna, but when I told mom last week she said to wait to talk to you about it because you were dealing with something stressful. Now I know what she meant."

You shook your head.

"Ugh, Mom..."

Your sweet, nonconfrontational mother, while you loved her deeply, was a horrible communicator. Whenever she got involved things like this always ended up worse. You looked at your sister twiddling with her wine glass. She looked so small. And Diana, while she exuded many things, very rarely seemed diminutive. You grabbed her and pulled her to you, and she instantly snuggled into your chest.

"I'm sorry you've had to hold that in all this time," You said softly, stroking her hair, "You really could have told me. How are you doing? Was it bad?"

She shook her head against you.

"Nah, it wasn't so bad. He's going to travel before starting grad school and wants to 'sow some wild oats'," she answered, flashing air quotes.

You couldn't see her face, but the acerbic nature of her tone told you just exactly what she thought of that concept. You snickered. Atta' girl. You'd never liked that guy much, anyway.

"What an asshole," you remarked.

"Yeah, he better not hit me up in a couple of months when he's done fucking his way through Europe."

"Fuuuuuck that," you commiserated. 

"Yeah, so I thought this summer would be our last hurrah. You know, no guys, just you and me...like old times" Diana mumbled in a voice that was all sulking and bottom lip. 

"Ahhh," you said with a smile, "So that's why you are so disappointed. Well, we still have a few days - we can make the most of them!"

Diana lifted her head from your chest and glared up at you.

"Boys ruin everything!" She whined.

You smirked softly.

"Usually I would agree with you, but the one I'm leaving for seems kind of decent, actually."

Diana frowned.

"How do you know? Did he call you or something? Wait, you never finished telling me your story!"

You hummed in assent.

"I mean, there's not much more to tell. I agreed to move out there to bond with him and begin treatment. I signed a really basic contract that will be revised when he is well enough to think about the future - or in a year, whichever comes first. They were pretty quick to meet my terms, I guess they didn't really have much choice since I was the one holding the all the cards."

"What does any of that have to do with him being a good guy?"

"Oh," you blinked, "It doesn't. You see, when they met with me they talked a lot about him. It was almost like a job interview or something. They talked about his accomplishments, his net worth, the importance of his work, and his worthiness as a person. One of the guys was actually one of his bandmates, and he had come specifically as a character reference. They had initially wanted me to sign the contract right there and then - and let me tell you, that kid they brought with them almost convinced me with his giant puppy eyes alone - but in the end I had asked for forty-eight hours to consult legal advisory and think it over. The first thing I did when they left was look him up. You actually probably already know who he is - I think I might have been the only person in the world who didn't. Have you ever heard of BTS?"

Diana jumped back like she'd been stung, clutching her chest.

"Are you about to tell me that your soulmate is a member of the biggest band in the world?" she whispered, her eyes impossibly wide.

You smirked. 

"Not just a member, Di...their leader." Diana shrieked, leaping up off the couch.

"RM??? Your soulmate is RM???" 

Your sister stared at you, agape, while you threw your hands up in indignation.

"I was the only person!"

"Oh my god..." Diana staggered back, demeanor having deviated sharply from disapproval to elation, "My roommate is obsessed with them! She has all these posters - but her favorite, I'm sorry, her bias, is Suga...holy shit, I can't WAIT to tell her she's gonna-"

"Diana," you interrupted her firmly, and her eyes shot up to you.

"Yeah?"

"You can't tell anyone."

Her face fell as she leaned back against the wall beside the fireplace. Clearly this was going to be even more of an emotional roller-coaster for her than it was for you, you thought in amusement. Typical.

"Everyone who I tell has to sign a gag order. You included."

Diana slid down the wall into a slump and knocked her head back.

"This situation keeps harshing my vibes, dude," she whined.

"Well, I'm exceedingly sorry about your vibes, but I'm sure they'll recover," you rejoined sardonically.

"But woah, Y/n, your boyfriend is hot. And rich. And super famous. Your wedding is going to be fucking LIT..." 

"Woah, Nellie!" You cut her off, waving your hands as if you usher her train of thought into the landing strip of sanity.  "Slow. Down. Wedding?? What happened to 'sketchy, ungrateful ass'?! He is NOT my boyfriend. He's supposedly my soulmate. According to some Swiss pseudoscience. We haven't even bonded yet. And if we do in fact bond, that doesn't mean we're a couple."

Diana popped her head up and fixed you with the most incredulous of stares.

"Um, excuse me...soulmates have to touch each other to survive. And I heard that the soulmate connection is better than sex. You're telling me you have the opportunity, nay, the duty, to be up in the business of one of the sexiest men alive, and you're just gonna platonically kick it for the next seventy years?"

You rolled your eyes.

"I mean, if that's what he wants - if that's what I want. Soulmates doesn't automatically equate lovers. I've been reading about people's experiences and there are some soulmates who bond platonically. Some people are already with romantic partners when they meet. Some don't share a sexual orientation that makes them compatible as lovers..."

"Oh my god, Y/n, could you please not kill the sexy by going all nerd on this?" She asked you in exasperation as her finger swiped at her phone screen.

Suddenly she shoved the phone out toward you, while tapping frantically with a neon yellow acrylic nail on the image she had summoned. She was saying something humorous and complaintive but you weren't listening. You were looking at the man in the photo.

You hadn't seen this one in your superficial search-engine dives. It was a headshot. His hair was a light brown, full at the top and styled away from his face. His skin was darker than in many of the other images you had seen, emanating a beautiful golden glow. He was smiling just enough for his right dimple to softly grace his cheek. His features were strong, masculine, and incredibly handsome. All of that was already striking, but his eyes, oh, his eyes - they were staring directly at the camera, irises only half visible under his lidded gaze, warm and sincere, so incredibly intense.

The hair stood up on the back of your neck and your breath caught in your chest in spite of you. You closed your eyes and sucked in a breath. You needed to calm down. He was just a person. Good looking? Yes. Charismatic? Obviously. But you had a job to do, and no time to screw around with schoolgirl daydreams. He probably had a girlfriend. No, definitely, he definitely had one. And hey, he was just a person, like you. No need to be star struck.

Diana had been continuing her rant, completely unaware of being ignored, when she had let out a high pitched squeal of laughter.

"Oh my god...oh my god!" She shrieked.

"What?" You snapped, your hormone-wrestling train of thought cut off abruptly.

She stared at you, lips pressed together as if she was trying to contain more loud giggles.

"What??" You demanded impatiently, your limit for her antics very swiftly approaching.

"RM. K-pop superstar, probably one of the coolest people ever born, gets YOUR dorky ass as a soulmate, HAH!"

"Hey!" you deflated, unimpressed with what she considered to be so vastly comical.

"Oh that poor man!" she pushed dramatically, "That poor, poor man. You're the least graceful, geekiest person in the western hemisphere. What will you even talk about? Good thing you don't speak Korean, you'd probably bore him to death! Shit, at least you're pretty..."

You folded your arms over your chest defensively.

"Hilarious. But actually, he's fluent in English. And I read somewhere that he likes art..."

"Y/n, he's rich," she interrupted condescendingly, "All rich people like art. It's a huge flex to own an original. If I was a billionaire I'd 'like art' too. Oh my god, I just can't believe this is happening. Like he's crazy famous..."

"And very, very sick," you reminded her softly.

Her expression fell into something contrite.

"Oh, shit, I forgot," she murmured.

"I'm glad you're excited for me, Di. It really made me feel a lot better about the whole situation seeing you get some kind of joy out of it. But I can't stress enough that this isn't a fairytale. Who knows how he feels about resorting to this. I guarantee you this is as hard for him as it is for me."

Diana crossed over to the couch and skooched in next to you.

"All jokes aside, he's lucky to have you, Y/n. You love at a thousand percent. Even if you guys just end up being soul-buddies, or whatever, he hit the jackpot," she smiled at you, that sweet smile that made you rethink everything for one split second.

Now it was your turn to try to hold back tears.

"I'm gonna miss you," she murmured, "But I respect what you're doing."

"Now that he's famous?" You prodded with a teasing smile.

"Yeah, now that he's famous," she conceded. 

You pulled her into a hug. The silence that hung around you was pregnant but comfortable. Diana finally broke it with a soft question.

"So you're really going to give your whole life away for a total stranger next week?" she whispered.

"Mmhm," you hummed somberly into her hair.

"Why you always gotta be like Dad?"

A familiar lump began to form in your throat, but you swallowed it back. You always did. And Diana fell asleep in your lap one last time. You stroked her hair as you thought back, rather emotionally exhausted, over your conversation. It seemed like people thought of the soulmate connection as some kind of miracle. You didn't believe in those. People made choices, and those choices governed reality. You had just made the biggest choice of your life, and if it was like any of the other roads you had taken, it would require much of you. 

The following day was your last at work. Your coworkers had greeted you with pizza, cake, flowers, and hugs. It was touching to realize how much you would be missed. Your boss, Shauna, hovered as you gathered you belongings from your desk. 

"Damn it to hell, I'm gonna miss you!" She mourned for the umpteenth time.

You smiled as you tucked your little philodendron into the box, placing it next to the canvas speckled with daisies that read "You Matter" in curly green letters. 

"You have an amazing team here, you guys will do great," you insisted, patting her hand where she leaned on your desk.

"Um, a great team of people you trained!" she said, consoling herself with a swipe of frosting from what had once been a beautiful red velvet cake with white buttercream.

You leaned beside her on the desk, joining her in sadly picking at the dessert remains.

After you had graduated with your degree in social work, you had landed an internship in a program which Shauna was running. The two of you quickly discovered you had similar passions and community goals, and the following year had left the program to start Magnolia Village, a one-stop shop for women's services sadly unprecedented in your area. While the startup had been rough, your passionate duo had believed in the need and refused to say die, and from your mutual blood, sweat, and tears had blossomed a cornerstone of the local community. Over the years it had grown and extended its reach to thousands in need of support. Many of the staff were women who had first come through the door seeking services, and were now your partners in providing the aid they had found empowering in their hour of need.

You were immensely proud of what the two of you had built, but leaving the Village was bittersweet, as you were more confident than ever that it had grown into a well-oiled machine powered by lovely, capable people who could keep it going at full tilt without you.

"This place basically built itself, we just propped up the scaffolding," you remarked, glancing around the building fondly - what had once been a residential fixer-upper was now a cozy space of offices, a nurse's station, six emergency beds, sanitation services, and a food pantry

"Bitch, you know very well that I am the bulldozer and you are the heart and soul of this place. We are going to feel it when you leave. You better come back and visit us. Mirabell is going to do a good job filling your shoes, though. Watching her step up to the plate has been something else." 

"It has," you nodded, "She's going to kick ass. You might just forget I was ever here by the end of next week."

Shauna turned uncharacteristically tearful eyes toward you.

"I will never forget you," she choked.

Then suddenly you were being crushed in a bear hug. You returned her embrace until you thought you might actually pass out from lack of oxygen.

"Okay, I love you, but I'm about to asphyxiate!" you wheezed, slapping her on the shoulder.

She let you go, but grabbed your arm and looked at you seriously.

"I want you to promise me one thing," she said, holding your gaze.

You cocked your head to the side. Shauna released your arm to clasp both your hands in hers.

"I want you to promise me that when you get to Korea, you find something that you're gonna do for yourself."

You started to respond but she stopped you.

"Something for yourself. It doesn't matter what it is, but it can't be for your soulmate, or your family, or anyone else however deserving...just you, okay?"

You looked at her quizzically.

"I do stuff for me..." 

"Don't get swallowed up, baby girl. Find someone to ground you, to remind you that you're worth more than what you have to offer."

You scoffed.

"I'd like to see someone try and swallow me..."

"Y/n,"

"What?"

"Promise me."

"Okay," you nodded, "I promise."

Shauna squeezed your hands, then went back to chipping away at the mass of red crumbs and buttercream.

A little twinge of worry twisted in the pit of your stomach. You were strong. Resilient. No one could bounce back like you, could survive like you. People knew this - they had been telling you so since you were ten years old. So why was everyone acting like you were being cast out to sea without a life preserver? 

You had spent the weekend with your family. Henry and Mercedes had even driven down, Elena in tow, to have one last Sunday dinner and see you off to the airport. Hugs and tears and small parting gifts had made leaving even harder than you had imagined.

When you finally boarded the plane your eyes were red and your head was throbbing. After the plane had gained enough altitude to allow you to unfasten your seat-belt, you had slipped into the restroom to rinse your face. You returned, plopping down next to the man who would accompany you during your first few days of transition.

"I'm getting booze when they wheel it by, Matt, so don't try to stop me," you huffed, gesticulating in mild threat with the book you had extracted from your carry-on at the suited figure sitting in the window seat.

The handsome older gentleman smiled, not lifting his eyes from the copy of the Korean Herald in his hands.

"Wouldn't dream of it," he responded, flipping a large, thin page.

Matt Anders had been many things to you in life. Before you were born, he had been your father's best friend. He had been the best man at your parent's wedding. He and his wife, Rebecca, had cared for you and your siblings during your mother's sanitarium stay. He had tutored you for the SAT score that had earned you a full ride to the university that had saddled you with a BS in social work and minor in English literature. Today, he was your attorney. Matt, who had an IQ of 146, had learned basic Korean so that he could translate for you and make sure that your interests were looked after as you settled in. Having him there made you feel one hundred percent more secure about the process. He, for instance, had been the one in negotiations to ask for the very cush business-class fight accommodations you were new settling into.

"Whatever you would do for him, you'll do for her. I want an equality of treatment clause added with no addendums."

You smiled to yourself as you remembered his exchange with the Hybe's representation. He had asked for things you would have never asked for yourself, and you felt better having access to them knowing that he felt you were deserving.

The flight attendant sweetly asked if you would require any refreshments. You asked for two whiskey and cokes, and handed one over to the man beside you. You took a long, refreshing sip.

"Damn it, I wish I had appreciated food more," you sighed, looking ruefully at your glass.

"What are you going to miss the most?" Matt asked before sampling his own beverage.

"Cheese. I can't believe I'm saying that, but in the end I just love cheese. And there are so many kinds I haven't tried. Do you know there's this Italian cheese that comes in the shape of a pear? It's super expensive because of the breed of cow the milk is sourced from. It's supposedly suuuuper creamy. But, hey, now I'll never know if it's as rich and complex as they say..."

You took another sip of your drink.

"Caciocavallo Podolico," Matt remarked casually, returning to his newspaper.

"Excuse me?"

"The cheese you described, it's called Caciocavallo Podolico," he reiterated.

"You know, I should be used to it now, but I'm not. Don't think I'll ever be. How on earth do you know this stuff?" you insisted incredulously.

"Read it once," he shrugged, "And it's actually pretty famous as far as cheeses go."

"Catch-a-vayo Picadillo..." you murmured.

"No," Matt interjected succinctly. "Anything you want to go over again? We have the time, Lord knows."

You sighed.

"Can't think of anything right now. What did you think of the list of questions I sent you?" 

"Very good," he nodded, "I'll be adding a few of my own, that I think should come from me, if you don't mind."

You swirled the ice in your plastic cup.

"Of course not. Thanks again for coming with me, I'd be pretty lost without you."

Matt smiled at you again, reaching over to squeeze your arm.

"You'd do just fine. But you would be flying coach."

You smirked and cracked open your book. As you flipped to your marked page, a colorful, sturdy rectangle of paper fluttered to the ground at Matt's feet. He reached down and picked it up, regarding it with a curious eye before you could snatch it quickly away and tuck it back between the pages of My Antonia.

"New bookmark?" he queried.

"Something like that," you murmured.

You thought he might press you further about the Hangul characters he had surely noted on the back, but just then the captain's voice crackled over the intercom reiterating the weather conditions in Seoul and you took the opportunity to bury your nose back between the pages. You glanced clandestinely over at Matt, who had settled back into the Korean Herald, before pulling the little watercolor card from between the pages where it had been hurriedly concealed. Your eyes traced over the purple clematis trailing elegantly across the illustration as you wondered if 12 hours was, in fact, a millisecond or an eternity.

-End Ch. 1-

#kim namjoon #rm #bts #kim namjoon fanfic #bts fanfction #rm fanfic #namjoon fanfic #namjoon fic #soulmate au #strangers to lovers #namjoon x y/n #namjoon x reader #namjoon x you #bts reader insert #reader insert #reader insert fanfiction #eventual smut #namjoon smut #chapter fic #eventual romance #slow burn

[wisecura]

pretty p.1 w.1688

Geto x gojo-reader

You're Gojo's cute little sister

masterlist

p.2

Being the little sister of The Satoru Gojo was one thing. It came with a lot of kickback from the elders and your family. You were always expected to be somewhat on a similar skill level as him. And you weren't necessarily weak by any means, but your big brother wasn't anything anyone could compare themselves to in the first place. But, it didn't help that you were close in age- you being only two years below him, and that you looked so similar- the white hair and blue eyes were an inherited trait. The family just couldn't hide the disappointment in your skill gap, and it was easy to say they tried to treat you as lesser than. Keyword - tried. 

It was a whole other thing having Toru as your big brother. He couldn't get enough of ya, and did nothing to hide his favoritism towards his cute little sister. Even if that meant putting both the elders or his family back in their place. Protective could be a gross understatement in how he treated you. And how could he stand silently when his cute little sister was being harassed - by even the house maids. 

From the very first day his mother came and introduced you to him as a baby swaddled in her arms. He was fascinated to find out that he was going to be a big brother. He still had no clue what that meant, but as the two of you grew older, everything clicked into place. 

You remember how closed off he was for the first few years of your time together. Not towards you, but just towards people in general. So getting to see him develop his personality beyond aggressive and slightly egotistical (which honestly resulted from your constant hounding at him to be nicer), was truly a blessing in your books. You thought he’d never grow out of that phase, it always resulted in the maids being scared of the both of you. You didn't mind as much when he was around. Most of the household seemed to have a small vendetta against you, and you'd be playing stupid if you said you had no idea why. You were weaker than Satoru. And you didn't hit a margin of their standards for you by a long shot. They all seemed to treat you very poorly. But not with your big brother. He seemed to protect you from most of the harsh words, and even harsher punishments they tried to sling your way. As long as he was around, you were safe. Once he got a bit older, understood his position better, and felt fed up enough, he was finally able to make his case. 

“Your responsibility? Ha! Don't make me laugh. You all have been nothing but a bunch of hypocrites, treating her like garbage since she was four-” 

“Satoru, you're being unreasonable, she’s being raised to know her place in the cla-”

“Unreasonable?” His eyes seemed to glow, ready to end this once and for all. “Me? Unreasonable? Let me make myself perfectly clear. From this moment forward, my sister will be under my care. None of you are allowed to approach her, scold her, teach her, anything.” His eyes narrowed in on the old man across the table. He could tell he was intimidated. He knew he had the upper hand here. The threat only inches below the surface of his words. I'm stronger than you, old man. 

It became known that day forward that no one was allowed to exert authority over you. Which left you largely ignored by the family. Soon enough it was time for him to leave for school. 

Satoru would be leaving soon for school and he wanted to ensure you were safe while he was gone. He was tempted just to bring you along with him. 

“Toru,” you sang “are you excited to be going to school soon?” You excitedly jump on his back, wrapping your arms tightly around his neck. He’s always sure to leave his infinity off when you're around him, knowing you liked to plan “surprise attacks” on him. You had always been with Satoru, as he had always been with you. Being apart like this poses many problems for you. Loneliness being the biggest one. He chuckled at your cute antics and carried you around the garden on his back, your feet kicking out back and forth. He was your best friend, and soon you wouldn't be able to walk here like this with him anymore. Satoru chose to ignore your question, figuring that whatever answer he gave would probably make you sad. This likely would be the last time for the next year that he'd hear your happy voice calling out to him. 

“We’ve got to do something fun before I leave!” He finally spoke. “I’m gonna miss you so much, imouto.” Your arms wrapped around him tighter. 

It was finally the day for Satoru to leave for high school. Staying in the dorms away from home would be heaven if he weren't leaving behind something so precious to him. He decided that when you were ready for high school, he would rent a place closer to the school. You'd both just stay there instead of coming back here. Until then, he would come back for your sake. 

You sorely missed Toru while he was gone. You took this time to practice your cursed technique, hoping to not be an embarrassment when you joined him in school. Your older brother was so cool and strong. You could only hope to catch up halfway before you got there. Toru would come back for the summer, and you could sense that he was happier not at the clan house. He told you all about the friends he's made while being gone- including some dude named Geto Suguru (he spoke a lot about him), and you showed him how much you've improved in your cursed technique. At the time you really didn't think much of what he talked about, but it intrigued you all the same. You were rarely let out of the manor, let alone allowed to make too many friends. You couldn't imagine what these people could be like. They surely wouldn't be better than your big brother, and you were sure to tell him so. Knowing how much you looked up to him didn't do his ego any favor. He really was the best big brother. 

And just like that- you were finally enrolled into Toru’s school. Finally let outside the manors' high fences. And to say you were ecstatic to finally be following your big brother would be an understatement. This time you'd be leaving with him, and you'd get to see the campus you longed to see. It was automatic enrollment when they heard you were Gojo Satoru’s little sister. Purely on recommendation, and of course Sartoru’s sway in the jujutsu world. You just needed to do a short interview and you’d surely be set to go.

Rolling up to the campus you saw how beautiful everything looked. Your brother's words didn't do it justice. Stepping outside of the car, both you and your brother made way to the dorms to settle in. You would be in two different classes, but you still get to see him regularly. 

Interview aside, meeting your new classmates was a pleasure. You had two others joining you as first years, both boys. Ugh. No girls? They looked nice enough. You couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable at how they looked at you when they first saw you. 

Kai, who was the taller of the two spoke first “You a Gojo?” He circled you “Definitely fit the look”

You backed away, not fully understanding his meaning. Kazuo, the shorter of the two, spoke next - “What's your cursed technique like?” He looked almost like a puppy you thought. Very cute. Definitely not cuter than my big brother though. You easily engaged in conversation with the two. You could tell you wouldn't mind being in their class, they seemed like plenty of fun. 

Then you ran into Satoru on campus. 

“Toru!” Your face lit up when you saw his tall lanky form. You went to surprise attack him again, as he fell forward. He caught his footing, surprised to see you, but soon smiled back with the same enthusiasm. 

“Guys this is my little sister” He ushered you face to face with two upperclassmen. A boy and a girl. The girl introduced herself, and you recognized her name instantly. The healer! The boy on the other had stood almost as tall as your brother, only he seemed more intimidating. His black hair swept back in a bun, and his eyes piercing through you. Frightening. You were stunned for a moment after actually locking eyes with him, you hadn't noticed your brother calling your name. 

“Aw, Suguru, looks like my lil sisters gotta crushy-wushy on ya!” He squeezed your cheeks together, causing your face to light up bright red. “Shut up, Toru!” You smacked his hand away and attempted to attack your brother for embarrassing you like that. Satoru continued teasing you ruthlessly.  Suguru stared for a second, not believing his eyes when he saw you. Satoru had described a small child when talking about you. 

He definitely didn't expect you. White hair pinned up in a half up-half down style, your blue stunner eyes that rivaled even your brothers, and features that would take down a model. You were a Gojo after all. You were basically a more lovelier version of Satoru. What did he expect when his best friend said that his baby sister was joining them at the high school this year? 

“Satoru, enough teasing. You're gonna make her cry.” He poked, his voice had a teasing lilt to it. 

“‘M not gonna cry!” You basically screeched. Your face and ears were both tinged with red at this point and he was pretty damn sure you looked close to crying. He couldn't stop the thought that automatically popped into his head. Pretty. The two boys both broke out in laughter.  

p.2

masterlist

#geto suguru #gojo satoru #gojo reader #getou suguru x reader #big brother #little sister reader #protective #teasing

[svnaaaaaa]

Monte Carlo : Charles Leclerc AU (Part Six)

pairing : charles leclerc x fem reader

summary : making things up, y/n and charles finding ways towards each other.

warning(s) : none

previous : part five

next : part seven

masterlist

author's note : might be the shortest part ever. sorry.

tagging : (if you want to be tagged in, let me know)

recap :

charles looked at y/n with disappointment on his facial expression, making y/n looked at the floor. "i can explain this, please give me time." y/n begged, charles shooked his head no. "i've got no time with you, this situation is giving enough of explanation, besides the real amélie has given me enough explanation." charles informed as y/n looked at charles with shock face. "amélie? w-what do you mean by that?" y/n asked, charles walked towards the door. "i don't know who you are but if you're here to play with my feelings, you're wrong. to think that i started to feel comfortable around you, i knew something was wrong." charles told y/n and then he left the office room, making y/n slumped onto her knees. grace ran towards y/n, grabbing by her shoulders. "shh, you're okay y/n." grace whispered as she pulled y/n into a hug while y/n started to cry her eyes out.

-

a month later.

noah still got a month left before new semester started. amélie came back to monte carlo to look after y/n since the charles incident. and y/n, working hard and have been focusing on her work for her studies. which worrying everyone surrounds her. grace, especially. day time in the office without leaving it even for lunch break, except bathroom breaks. night time in the room of the suite, not eating anything except for drinking water.

and grace have never seen her like this before. but she have seen her sister like this before. it was the effect of a heartbreak.

weeks after weeks, it was the day they were suppose to went back to university of sydney. but grace went alone because y/n wanting to go to her uncle isaac's home in canada, montreal to be exact. "hey kiddo." uncle isaac greeted as he saw y/n in his view. y/n smiled weakly at his way and went into his arms of hug. uncle isaac chuckled as he brushed through his niece's hair. "tough life, huh?" uncle isaac asked and he felt his niece's head nodded against his chest. uncle isaac nodded his head too, understood what was happening to his niece a month ago. it was told by noah and uncle isaac decided to bring y/n here for her recovery.

"so i see that the auction party went well, did you had fun back then?" uncle isaac asked as he placed y/n's comfort drink in front of her. "it was fine, i am happy that i could help." y/n replied as she slowly sip on the drink. uncle isaac smiled at the reply.

from what has been told by noah, y/n replaced amélie's place as amélie to the monaco grand prix because of the pr purpose but apparently, y/n developed feelings towards one of the drivers from ferrari, charles leclerc. but then, it eventually exposed when charles called the real amélie and things turned bad since then. now here is y/n, in montreal.

-

a jacket was thrown on y/n's head. y/n took it off of her head and looked at the one who threw it at her way. it was amélie. amélie? "get up loser, we have some guy to beat up on." amélie said as she grabbed y/n's hands and pulled her up, making y/n stands up. y/n groans. "why?" y/n whined as she almost slumped back onto the couch but caught by noah. "because we care for you and we want you to be happy." noah replied as he wrapped his arms around his sister's waist. y/n sighed. "i don't deserve to be happy." y/n said and she groaned and slumped into noah's arms, making noah tighten up his grip. "no, you don't." noah said as he chuckled.

"come on, we have a race to go." noah announced as he pushed y/n out of the house.

-

"charles." the brunette turned around and saw his spaniard partner, calling for him. charles went to him. "i know i should not interfere into your personal problems but don't you think it has been a long time since you talked to her?" carlos asked, making charles sighed. "mate, i should have not be with her in the first place. i don't even know who she is, she's not real." charles replied and this time carlos sighed. "i know this is not my place to intervene but she's real." carlos said as he holds charles' shoulders and then he turned charles around. charles' eyes widen up. "and she's here." carlos ended and he let go of charles' shoulders.

charles saw y/n walked her way towards him. charles noticed that she looks a bit pale. her lips were in pale peach colour, her complexion seems to fade its colour. her eyes, looks almost sunken. charles shorten the walk by walking towards her way and their meet each other. it was silent even if they were surrounded by people and noise.

"are you okay?"

was all charles asked. y/n looked up at him and charles could see the sorrowness reflected on her eyes. he gave an impact on her. her feelings for him were genuine. and he broke her heart.

"i don't expect you to forgive me but i am sorry. i meant nothing wrong, maybe i just caught up with my feelings." y/n explained herself as charles slowly pulled her into a hug, kissing the top of her head. "it's okay, i forgive you." charles said and he felt her arms wrapping around his waist. charles smiled weakly.

"i love you."

y/n pulled away from the hug and once again, looked up at him. "what?" y/n asked in disbelief and charles keep on smiling at her. "i love you y/n." charles repeated again and this time, he cupped y/n's cheeks. "for a whole month, ever since i left you, i keep on thinking about you." charles started as he carassed his thumbs on y/n's apple cheeks, making him smiled.

"i imagine of how you would be there at the paddock, cheering for me after races. how you and me go back home to a place both of us felt like home, and i even imagine you and i, maybe a wedding." charles ended his speech. y/n's eyes brighten up. "a wedding?" y/n asked, making charled chuckled. "m-maybe in the future, sure." charles replied as y/n smiled at the thought. "i like that." y/n answered and then as they were about to lean in, charles' engineer entered.

"charles, gear up now." xavi said as both charles and y/n chuckled. "see you after the race?" charles asked and y/n nodded her head yes, smiling brightly at charles. "i will be here." y/n replied, making charles kiss y/n's head lightly.

#charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc #charles leclerc imagines #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc fanfic #scuderia ferrari #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 fic #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 #formula one x you #formula one x y/n #formula one x reader #formula one imagine #formula one fanfiction #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 #charles leclerc f1 #charles leclerc series

[runabout-river]

One thing that bothers me about jujutsu is that the author doesn't know how to develop some characters. 1 Shoko Ieri is an interesting character but I find her apathetic without a cold and superficial personality. 2 itadori yuji doesn't seem to be a protagonist he seems more like a tool than the protagonist of the work. 3 nobara had no development dry and emotionless death. and many other characters. There were only 2 characters that really had development, which was gojo and geto, for me, they were the only ones that had it. Why do you think the author did this, is it because he didn't want to develop the characters that's why he killed many important characters? I would appreciate it if you respond.

This is a lot to answer so sorry if it gets confusing a little.

1.) and you really have to keep this in mind, is that the manga isn't finished yet. It's also not about to finish. We have just reached the beginning of the end and we have at least another 6 months to go if not more. Without the last panel drawn, we can't really talk about the stuff Gege hasn't put into the story yet.

Still, many of your points can be addressed.

Shoko: In both the present and the past storylines, she is a side character without her side of the story being shown too much. Her being cold and apathetic can be a fitting description of her in the present but in the past she was more open and easy-going.

When you say she has a superficial personality that's where your interpretation is a little off. For one, her personality changes and for two, her current personality reflects the cost that living as a sorcerer has on people. We are also shown her inner thoughts on occasion but interestingly, one of those thoughts kind of comments her role in the story.

(This thought also establishes that she has trouble understanding Gojo's point of view on his godlike status)

The thing with Shoko is that we're never shown what she does: heal and save people. That's an aspect of her character that has been completely, and deliberately I say, missing until this point. But she has saved the lives of: Geto, Ino and Angel (plus some others) and she has therefore shaped the entire plot of the manga extremely.

But this I think will change in the most impactful way possible: with her saving Gojo's life by showing us for the first time what her CT is and how she heals people.

On Nobara, you're right. She had little character development and no reflection on her thoughts and beliefs. To this I say, read my post about her coming back because I believe that she will get that character develepoment and reflection when she re-enters the manga.

The same thing goes for Tsumiki. I was really disappointed when Yorozu died and Tsumiki basically disappeared from the story with her role never being more than that of a prop. But it was pointed out to me, that Tsumiki actually had been shown in an active role in the manga 70 chapters ago and that role will definitely be revisited when Megumi gets the spotlight again.

Now to Yuji. Did you realize that you contradicted yourself? You said that Yuji doesn't feel like a protagonist but you also said that Geto and Gojo had the best character developement. You're definitely talking about Hidden Inventory here but HI is and arc where Yuji is removed as the protagonist.

So the main protagonist being removed from the story temporarily has a purpose. You could say that that was a flashback and doesn't really count and that you mostly mean the 4 mini-arcs in Culling Games where Yuji wasn't present + the Sukuna/Yorozu fight + the Gojo/Sukuna fight.

Gojo/Suku we don't even count in this, that's a given, Sukuna/Yorozu is character showing plus setup for the future and Yuki/Choso/Tengen vs Kenjaku we don't count either, because that's a plot progression plus villain fight.

In my experience when people talk about Yuji not being a good protagonist because he isn't present often enough, they mean the arcs where Yuta, Maki and Hakari take centre stage. (The three other mini-arcs add to this)

Why would a mangaka do their story like this?

For world building. To be more precise: for plot building. Yuta, Maki and Hakari have important roles for the endfights and for that they needed character development (Maki), a show of their powers (all) and setups for the future (eg alliances with Kashimo and Uro).

Right from the beginning, JJK always moved the plot forward first. That's why the pace is so fast. The story is plot driven and not character driven, but that doesn't mean that the characters aren't given their time, just that that time isn't an entire chapter.

You can critizese this of course, I too would've liked small character scenes to have been expended on. That Yuji is taken off the picture for world building isn't sth I would critizise though. That's what happened in parts of Attack on Titan, and it also happens constantly in One Piece with Luffy albeit in Flashbacks.

It simply adds to the story when we can see other characters act on their own and while Yuji is back in the centre now, he will most likely take small steps back again to let other characters shine like Megumi eg. It also adds to his personality, but for the end of the manga he will be the centre of attention.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #itadori yuuji #nobara kugisaki #shoko ieiri #ask #meta

[irinanonyme]

⚠️Long ass XO Kitty post with spoilers⚠️

OK I need to say this: I would MUCH rather people were honest and said that they just personally prefer Kitty x Minho because of their fun dynamic instead of saying stuff like "Kitty x Yuri came out of nowhere" or "it didn't feel natural" or "it was already too late in the season"

Like... No??? It?? Wasn't??

You cannot IMAGINE the euphoria I felt when I realized that this plot is actually going somewhere. As I was watching episode 1, right off the bat I felt like Yuri's and Kitty's "meet-cute" was the most powerful.

With Dae, Kitty had asked him to take a picture of her with her family.

With Minho, he bumped into her with his bag then pretended that he doesn't speak English.

But Yuri??? her car ALMOST runs Kitty over, it STRIKES her, sweeps her off her feet then Yuri gets out in a hurry, worried, offering a ride then they actually have a genuine conversation in the car.

The first half of the season is them being "rivals" while still respecting eachother. (So the whole "enemies to lovers" argument for Kitty x Minho doesn't even work cause like, it was the same??? For Yuri and Kitty?? If not more intense because there is actual tension, not only bickering) Then learning about how their mothers were best friends and roommates adding to the "fate" factor of their relationship after their over the top meet-cute. Finally, they become friends and support eachother as best as they can and as they do, Kitty realizes that this dream she had of Yuri wasn't "just" a random dream and she actually *does* have feelings for Yuri and this. ALL of this progression just felt so organic and gradual and overall just, well-done?? And not rushed at all how some people claim it to be.

To me it just feels like this is the first time in a while (if ever, for ME personally) that the audience of a show got "straightbaited" and honestly? I loved it.

Everytime things were going well or starting to go well between Kitty and Dae I couldn't help but be worried/sad/disappointed, thinking that surely this whole development with Yuri would be dropped and they would go back to being friends but it NEVER HAPPENED. Thus far, everytime things were going good, great or even amazing with Dae, Kitty couldn't help but think back to Yuri and I felt so much relief from it everytime.

And to be clear, this isn't meant AT ALL as hatred towards Kitty x Minho or their shippers. I think their potential is very solid and Minho is really lovable BUT I just don't want Yuri to be erased from the picture by people's claims that their relationship "wouldn't make sense" or that it was rushed or any other complaint of the same type.

People say that while Kitty hasn't shown any interest in Minho (yet) Yuri hasn't shown any in Kitty either and that she's still very much in love with Juliana... now I'm just entering speculation territory here so feel free to leave if you're not interested or take this with a grain of salt but -> I almost fully believe that if (and I hope to god there is) a season two of this show, Yuri and Juliana might encounter some difficulties and break up. Now I don't want to undermine the feelings they have for eachother AT ALL, but as we've seen with this season with Kitty and Dae, the author/writers aren't afraid to end a couple that had (apparently) been going strong for 4 years. So if a 2nd season gets greenlit, although Dae is out of the picture, I bet Kitty Minho and Yuri will somehow end up in a triangle (well, in a way they kind of already ARE but you get my point.)

Realistically we really don't know that much about Yuri and Juliana's relationship beyond the fact that they were most likely eachother's first love and that their parents separated them after finding out that they're gay. I don't think it's impossible that in some way or another, their romantic relationship will end (on a good note hopefully!) To let place to the love triangle. Not that I like love triangles but well, they gotta set something up for 2nd season and this is the most safe bet atm.

On a completely unrelated note, I loved that scene on stage where Minho and Dae were looking at eachother like typical rivals in love with the same girl right out of a k-drama while their "girl" just accidentally set fire to the stage and her clothes because her mind is full of another girl jdhzhdjdhdhd. And that's also a big part of the reason why I'm rooting for KittyxYuri! I feel like a concept like this has never been done to completion. In general the girl will go right back to liking one of the guys while her "crush" towards the girl will be written off as just a short-lived attraction but here? There's still a strong possibility of it being legit.

Aaaaaa anyway this all ended up in a rambling. Sorry about that

#xo kitty #xo kitty spoilers #kitty x yuri #i'm not actually sorry #jdjshehshve #I love rambling #hopefully some people will like it at least 💀

[hanilessa]

» :、♡  ONE HEART FOR TWO

` Childe x Reader

` Genre: angst, hurt/comfort

` Warnings: dark content, suicidal behavior, selfharm, abusive attitude (on the part of the reader's parents)

` Author’s notes: i wrote this on request for dear @silverbladexyz. sorry for the wait and i hope you don't get disappointed. enjoy reading! ♡

also my inbox is open for your requests! feel free to text me if you want to request headcanons. :3

You were a student from Kshahrewar. You always wanted to study in Amurta, because you were attracted by biology and medicine, and you always wanted to help people. But at the insistence of your parents, you had to go to Kshahrewar, because they claimed that working as an architect brings a lot of money.

You never had a rapport with your parents. They never listened to you and didn't take your desires and dreams seriously. Your parents didn't see you as a person, they only saw you as a way to become richer and more successful.

And on this basis, you developed a deep depression. You tried to deal with it on your own, reading books on psychology, sneaking into the library. You even went to a healer, but it didn't help. And then you decided to resort to drastic measures. You were always afraid of pain, but when you felt the cold metal of the blade cuts the skin of your hands, it sobered your mind for a few moments and helped you forget about your problems.

When you met Childe, you didn't tell him that you were doing selfharm. But things got more complicated when you both realized you loved each other, and you two started living together.

You tried to wear closed clothes in his presence to hide your scars on your arms, hoping that he would never find out about something like that. But, to your regret, this moment finally has come.

"Honey, I'm home!" You heard your lover's voice from the front door, and you smiled tiredly as you cut vegetables for the salad. You usually cooked when Tartaglia wasn't at home, because you always had to roll up the sleeves of your sweater so that it wouldn't get dirty. But today, Ajax returned too early, so you completely forgot that your sleeves were rolled up to the elbow, revealing your scar marks.

"Welcome back!" You smiled brightly as the man came up behind you and kissed you on the cheek, wrapping his arms around your waist.

"What do we have for dinner?" Childe asked, admiring the way you slowly sliced vegetables for the salad. For a moment, his eyes widen as he notices something is wrong.

The man immediately takes your left wrist in his hand and lifts it up, noticing the huge pale stripes. There were terribly many of them, and at first Tartaglia didn't even understand what it was. You abruptly recoiled to the side and hurried to cover your hands with the sleeves of your sweater, fearfully realizing that your boyfriend finally found out about your terrible little secret.

"What is this?" The man furrowed his brows as he stared into your eyes. You became nervous, shifting from foot to foot, not knowing how to explain your problems to him.

"Are you talking about those scratches?" You laughed awkwardly, and winced at how nervous your laugh sounded. Tartaglia came a little closer to you. "It's just that my cat was too out of control when I was younger. Even if I just took her in my arms, she immediately scratched me." You tried to laugh casually, but you knew that Ajax didn't believe a single word you said.

"Y/n, don’t lie to me. I always know when you're hiding something from me." His voice was stern, but at the same time he was saddened that you hid from him for a long time the fact that you intentionally harmed yourself. "A cat couldn't leave so many scars in the same place."

You realized that it was absolutely useless to lie to Eleventh Fatui Harbinger, and then crystal tears appeared in your eyes, which you had been holding back for a very long time. The man immediately sat you down on the sofa and poured water into a glass for you, sitting next to you and waiting for you to finally start talking. He didn't rush you, respecting your feelings.

You drank some water and finally collected your thoughts, gradually telling Childe about your problems with your parents. You mentioned that you have tried all the ways to deal with depression, but the only thing left for you was the physical harm to your body. The ginger man was silent all this time, but when you finished speaking, he hugged you, stroking your back, and at that moment you cried again, hugging Ajax in return. In his arms you felt peace, care and love, which you lacked for a long time.

"There is always another way, love." He whispered into your hair, lightly kissing the top of your head. "Please remember that your feelings are very important and that you have me. I can always listen to you and help you. And you don't have to hurt yourself to get away from problems. It hurts me that I wasn't with you at that time in your life and that I couldn't prevent it all." Childe continues to speak, holding you to his chest. "But now I'm with you, and I will do everything to make you happy. Therefore, I beg you, never do anything like that to yourself again."

He looked into your beautiful eyes, and you nodded softly, feeling the peace you longed for finally appear in your heart.

"I promise."

The ginger man smiled happily, kissed you on the lips, and then said.

"You and I have one heart for two bodies, I will share your pain for two, and it will cease to exist."

#— : requests for hani from you ♡ 。 #tartaglia x reader #childe x y/n #childe x reader #tartaglia x y/n #genshin x you #genshin x reader #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin imagines #tartaglia imagines #childe x you #tartaglia angst #childe angst #childe imagines #tartaglia x you #genshin impact headcanons #tartaglia headcanons #childe headcanons

[monsterblogging]

Pacific Rim: Ascension is pretty good, actually

So yeah, Pacific Rim: Ascension is a prequel novel to Pacific Rim: Uprising, and based on that you might think it wouldn't be that great. But IMO, it's very much worth reading for a number of reasons.

The author was clearly very familiarized with the lore developed for PR1, and actually integrates a lot of it into the story in a way that gives it a sense of depth, reality, and drama that Uprising and The Black lack. Characters are also generally written well (and Hermann is written so wonderfully well), and Vik and Jinhai's backstories are, in my opinion, extremely engaging. And if you're one of the people disappointed that the Kaidonovskys and Cherno Alpha didn't get more screentime, you are absolutely in for a treat.

For the lore-oriented fans, the author's clear attention to detail means this book is actually a fairly reliable source on what was originally developed for PR1, including Jaeger details and character histories. It does include at least one piece of outdated data (Romeo Blue having three legs), and the story claims that drift compatibility is something you either have or don't have (something we know isn't true from Beacham's posts), but there's no reason to dispute, say, Vulcan Specter having a drill weapon or Shaolin Rogue having an extra-aquatic design.

The book also gives us lots of wonderfully bizarre kaiju. The somewhat frequent mentions of tentacles (forbidden by del Toro) suggests that these are based on very concepts, or were invented by the author himself. Either way, they are absolutely great monster designs. If anything, some of the things these monsters have going on make the movie's kaiju look a little boring.

That said, it's not perfect. Hermann's cane is never mentioned at all, and - well, the rest of the issues are spoilers, so I'll put them under a cut.

We learn that some people have apparently been using Pons technology to implant programming into people's minds - a detail which ultimately has no relevance on the plot, and feels weirdly edgy for Pacific Rim. And I know it's a common trope in sci-fi, but its proximity to right wing conspiracy theory bullshit makes it... not exactly my favorite trope. I don't know whether its presence in sci-fi is really super problematic, but in real life belief in this kind of thing has been used to basically justify witch hunting. Like, I understand the dramatic value here, but at the same time, people still living today were put on trial and even sent to jail based on belief that this was a real thing. Like I'm not going to tell you that this is an Objectively Bad Trope, but it's definitely a trope with a lot of terrible baggage.

The story also gives an explanation for how it was worked out that kaiju blood explodes when exposed to rare earth minerals, and it's pretty ridiculous. Supposedly a kaiju's blood rained down on a microchip factory, and the factory exploded. Accepting this detail means accepting that nobody's phones, laptop computers, or other electronic devices never came into contact with kaiju blood splatter or mist, and that kaiju blood never splattered into a damaged conn-pod. This is the kind of thing that should have been observed fairly early in the kaiju war, not several years in.

Also the PPDC in this book apparently just classifies information for No Real Reason, like the fact that a particularly violent kaiju cult tried to destroy the world. Like you'd think that this would be the kind of thing they'd want to broadcast, for reasons of "hey look how awful our political enemies are."

Also lol the fact that PPDC records pilots' drift memories and just peek into them is creepy. Like it doesn't exactly make Mako Mori look good when we learn she's been invading cadets' privacy like this, ya know?

But yeah like, I think it's definitely worth a read. The book shows a lot of imagination and makes good use of Pacific Rim's worldbuilding. Even if you don't like Uprising, you'll probably still find something to enjoy about it.

#pacific rim #pacific rim ascension

[guillotinekim]

I read Legendborn this week and it was nothing short of excellent. I'm reading Bloodmarked now and I need somewhere to dump my thoughts, so to whoever might stumble across this: bear with me.

It's definitely keeping my interest...but Bree is suddenly annoying as all fuck? So that's disappointing.

She's probably the same as she was in the first book, but I think that's the problem. The stakes are much higher and she's had next to no character development. I'm at the halfway point of the book and so far it's been full of her rushing into danger when she knows she barely has any combat training and can't control her powers, constantly not listening to the people who are literally trying to help her and throwing tantrums when she doesn't get her way. Like girl, you are not the only one at risk. Assuming all of the information given so far about Legendborn history is true, if Bree dies, the world will literally be left vulnerable to all manner of demons, who will wreak havoc unchecked???

With that being said I find myself frequently going off on Bree in my own head. The inner rants usually sound something like, "Why can't you ever be quiet? Why can't you follow instructions? Why are you not assessing situations before reacting? You're not the only one who wants to rescue Nick. Why are you giving so much lip and resistance to the few people left that you know you can actually trust when they're just trying to protect you? And WHY are you acting like you don't need to be protected when you've almost been killed multiple times since you (technically) became king???"

I hope the second half of the book sees her grow a little more self awareness. She can't just keep fucking up and then feeling sorry afterwards. An actual war is ongoing. Lives are at stake and remorse doesn't bring people back from the dead.

But since this is my very first post about this series...let me be very clear:

Even though I'm actively beefing with the protagonist in my head, I'm still glad I discovered this series. Growing up loving Fantasy books meant growing up reading epic Caucasian tales of wonder that sprinkled in characters of color as afterthoughts. A supernatural adventure with a black girl as the lead is just something I never got to have as a kid. Aside from the premise just being interesting, there's a really refreshing amount of diversity. Not just in race, but in sexual orientation—and the inclusion of queer characters is also something I didn't get to see a lot of growing up. I'm rooting for this series to see even more success and visibility. Shout out to the author, Tracy Deonn. She deserves the world.

But Bree? Sister, please. Let's get it together!

#legendborn #bloodmarked #currently reading #tracy deonn

[lynne-monstr]

alternate first meeting where yu wenzhou drops out of blue rain's training camp early to focus on putting his intellect to use in a way that might better suit him. no one really notices.

a couple years later, huang shaotian visits blue rain's technical department to give input on a silver weapon for his upcoming debut. he's super psyched to talk to the head of the department, a genius who's rumored to be both deeply knowledgeable in glory and also highly unconventional. but huang shaotian is left with disappointment when he finds only training camp dropout yu wenzhou in the office.

huang shaotian isn't rude but he isn't overly polite either. he says hello to yu wenzhou, drops off the flash drive of requirements and features he'd like for his new weapon. and then he leaves.

he stops by a few more times to test the progress and chat with the various techs, and is disappointed every time that the elusive head of the department is never there. yu wenzhou is, though, and huang shaotian figures he must have dropped out of the training camp to pursue an apprenticeship as a silver weapon designer. they talk more and more, about silver weapons and obscure glory facts and even a little about the pro scene. with each visit, huang shaotian is more and more impressed with yu wenzhou's knowledge.

it doesn't hit him until the next visit that it's a little weird how yu wenzhou is always unsupervised when he talks to huang shaotian, and also when he makes little tweaks to ice rain. no one ever looks over his shoulder or yells at a newbie apprenticeship not to touch the pro team's weapons.

whatever. as long as the weapon is good, huang shaotian doesn't mind. and yu wenzhou turns out to be a good conversationalist. sharp, insightful, and funny too. huang shaotian even comes away with a few ideas of how he can incorporate his new silver weapon into the team’s overall strategy.

blue rain must have the best apprenticeship in the world if even their deadlaat players can learn so much!

and then the day finally dawns when the weapon is finished. an email notification flashes up on huang shaotian's phone from the department head's official email account. there's still no signature, which is annoying. huang shaotian never caught the guy's name and as blue rain's future captain he's been too embarrassed to ask.

once more, he approachew the office. yu wenzhou is there, sitting at the desk. he smiles when huang shaotian arrives.

it's a kind smile, gentle and welcoming. "shaotian. come in."

huang shaotian hovers in the doorway, shuffling his feet. "um yeah, sorry I have an appointment."

yu wenzhou only nods and it makes the whole thing more awkward.

"I'm looking for your boss," huang shaotian blurts out. it's the first time, he thinks, that he's seen yu wenzhou so utterly confused.

yu wenzhou recovers quickly. "my boss? the...team manager?"

the awkwardness grows thicker. huang shaotian deals with it the best way he knows how. he talks.

"come on, don't play dumb with me, you're way too smart for that. your boss, you know..." huang shaotian waves a hand to encompass the room. "the owner of this office. the super genius head of the technical department who's never once said hello to me. does he not like the pro team? does he not like me?"

yu wenzhou's confused face smooths into something more amused. he sits straighter in his seat, hands folded together on the desk. "I have it on good authority that he likes you very much."

huang shaotian huffs, the old familiarity of his routine with yu wenzhou taking hold. he shuffles into the room until he's standing in front of the modest sized desk. he's never spent all that much time in the office. usually he knocks on the door and yu wenzhou appears from one of the workrooms and snags him to come visit the main development area.

he's never stood this long in front of the desk, never seen it from this precise angle. and maybe that's why, for the first time, he sees the placard nearly hidden behind a stack of hand-printed dungeon guides.

Blue Rain Technical Dept

Director, Yu Wenzhou

"oh no," huang shaotian whispers.

he can feel his face burning already. is this some kind of delayed deadlast revenge? a rush guilt nearly sweeps him away, souring his stomach.

he never apologized to yu wenzhou, did he? for calling him names back then.

huang shaotian can't bring himself to lift his head and meet yu wenzhou's eyes. "sorry," he mumbles.

"it was a long time ago, no need to apolgize. but thank you."

from anyone else, it might sound cold, but huang shaotian has been getting to know yu wenzhou while they worked on his silver weapon. he gets the sense yu wenzhou means it. a sliver of hope works its way into his heart.

slowly, yu wenzhou draws a familiar account card from his jacket pocket, spinning it between his fingers.

"ice rain!" the excitement bursts from huang shaotian like a summer storm. "can i... can I have it?" he feels stupid asking. of course he can have it, he's going to be the team's captain next year. he doesn't answer to the head of the technical department.

the card pauses mid-spin and yu wenzhou extends his hand. and there's that nice smile again. how did huang shaotian never notice in training camp how nice yu wenzhou's smile was.

"it's yours," yu wenzhou says. "I made it for you."

the words catch in huang shaotian’s chest, tangle in his ribs. when he takes the card, his fingertips brush yu wenzhou's.

before he can do anything else deeply stupid today. huang shaotian takes the card and runs.

"bye yu wenzhou. thanks yu wenzhou!" he throws over his shoulder as he leaves. and then he pauses, pokes his head back around the door frame. "um or, I guess... department head yu."

as he runs away for the second time, he can just barely make out yu wenzhou voice floating down the hall after him.

"it's wenzhou."

#the king's avatar ramblings #yuhuang #does this count as fic?? #maybe I'll clean it up and put it on ao3 one day #ficlets

[hellcifrogs]

Saying Sakura didn't have as much screentime as Sasuke and Naruto doesn't equal to being useless, it equals to her being the support for them while being a main character. Saying Sakura had high expectations for the reader and not meeting them doesn't equal to being useless either.

Being useless is when you're in the screen and don't do anything or speak or add ideas, but Sakura has always helped people, helped Naruto, helped Sasuke, helped Kakashi, prevented people from dying and got to fight. On top of becoming the only woman to be called the strongest kunoichi and best at what she specializes.

I don't call that useless, I call it underutilized. Remove Sakura and everybody is dead so having understood that Kishimoto is misogynistic, let's understand Sakura from that sexist pov and appreciate what she does from it, which is awesome for a female.

I mean... That's exactly what I said? 'Underutilized' is a better word indeed. Since you already got me rambling here let's get into it…

tl;dr I think Sakura is a genius, I think she develops beautifully in the series and I think she doesn't deserve half the bullshit the fandom has against her. But is it childish of me to say that the biggest thing she had against her was the author himself? Maybe. I don't really care though, that's how I feel because Kishimoto hates his main female character and it shows. He says one thing about her and then shows another so I just don't listen to him!

I feel Sakura is writen to be a failure, or annoying or disappointing. All words that could translate into underutilized depending on the context I guess. And I noticed that clearly when I read that scene in the war arc with "the original team 7". So here we go...

Kishimoto always, always even from the time she cut her hair in the chunin exams - She takes this huge step only to continue not doing much, be it getting trapped by Gaara when she was supposed to rescue Sasuke instead, or just not going with the recovery team (and even before that when she is the one to manage to climb a tree on the first try - 'oh she's so talented' and then follows up with her doing a great nothing in the bridge fight), he always builds up some expectation for her and nearly immediately lets us down by not going through with it. To put it simply it's like he can't have a girl actually do the same as the boys. - even her managing to climb on her first try feels like an excuse to get her out of the way, now that I think about it.

I guess the first time I noticed there was kind of a pattern to Sakura not being on the 'same level' as her teammates was when she couldn't kill Sasuke despite how sure of her decision she was shown to be, how everyone around her seemed shocked and hurried to put a stop to it (Kakashi even saying it was suicide and she was 100% determined to do it, but then it had to be ruined by her feelings -ngl at this point I was getting seriously angry with her still liking Sasuke at all and lowkey wanted her to kill him). The moment I realized it was just too contraditory was at the war. When she is clearly shown to us to be 'beside' Naruto and Sasuke, everyone looking at them seems to have that same impression, everyone who knows her believes it to be so and comments on it.

But then what? She just doesn't. Why? Because Kishimoto wrote her that way. I have to laugh. It's not her fault. If it had happened once or twice throughout 15 years of the manga, but no, Kishimoto went through the trouble of constantly failing Sakura. So, yes, I think it's his fault. At first I even let it slide because he *treated all women like trash*, they were all inferior and you could tell that. Over the years he started to treat them better, give them more roles and power and somewhat respect the female cast. Improvement, right? Of course. Except for Sakura who showed no difference.

We get to shippuden and she is fighting her own battles and getting hurt along the team and accomplishing things, healing people, but why doesn't that happen at the important decisive moments though?? - four tails Naruto - faints, Pein attack - cries, killing Sasuke - doesn't. Maybe it's just that he never allowed her to have any agency?

Anyway once I noticed that, I just had to separate what Sakura really is in the universe, how people around her see her and what she accomplished and what was shown, I took the characters' word instead of what Kishimoto tried to tell us. And surprise! Now Sakura is beautiful and talented and hard working AND sensitive and I love her.

Un.for.tu.na.tely… that meant I now could see other characters like that too and so I hated Sasuke and Naruto, who had been my precious little ball of pride and sunshine, was now super annoying. And worst of all Hinata. Maybe I shouldn't go into that since this is about Sakura, but it also makes me sad that the two characters are basically put against each other all of the time??? Hinata was my favorite girl for years (oh I still love her). I was SO excited when she confessed to Naruto, aah I shipped Naruhina so hard.

And then I read the series again (: and Hinata barely ever appears in it ): her confession suddenly came out of nowhere D:

Hinata suffers the opposite treatment Sakura has. She's not shown doing anything (she is simply not shown) but in the final chapters she is suddenly the strong, changed, determined love interest. And worst of it all: that's all she is.

I'm not saying her being opposite to Sakura is a good thing, it is just as bad. She has no character, she is "the love interest". I felt like eveything I loved about Hinata was in my memories of watching the anime as a teenager. The "original" Hinata was a disappointment for me and it made me just as angry because Kishimoto literally ignored her until he needed a pair for Naruto. She could have been so much more, she had the background for it.

And yeah… I know maybe I shouldn't go looking for good female representation in an old shounen manga. Not one by a man at least. But I guess that doesn't stop me from having an opinion about it.

#damn its long #how did i end this with hinata lol #No need to start any discussion about this #I think weve all heard and read enough about it #this is just me getting it all out of my chest bc once i started it just wouldnt stop #I tried to make it clear but it's a lot of thoughts so maybe its still messy

[amyreads]

First off I just wanted to say thank you for infamous!! I can’t even pinpoint what it is but it has taken over my brain for the last week since I discovered it. Your writing/character development is amazing and you really are just a spectacular writer- you really know how to set up a scene and make it feel authentic. I absolutely love how open you are to hearing your readers wants/suggestions and it’s amazing that you’re already planning on doing POV chapters/bonus content, but I just want to make sure you don’t burn yourself out! Obviously you know what you can handle more than anyone else does, but I have seen IF authors get burn out and over extend themselves by trying to create extra content that will appease their readers and I would hateeeee to see that happen to you and Infamous! I am planning on supporting your Patreon as soon as it drops and I will obviously soak up any content I can, but I would rather not have any bonus content if that means you can focus solely on the book itself so you don’t have too much on your plate!! I hope this doesn’t come across as rude, as I said you know what you can handle and I’m grateful for anything you decide to create and share with us!! But I just wanna make sure you don’t get overwhelmed will all the extra stuff too ❤️

Thank so much :,) First, I'm glad you like Infamous and it always surprises me when someone likes it shjsjsj and it makes me happy! Secondly, it's very sweet of you to look out for me that way. It's true I have taken a bit of a step back from answering questions on the main blog. I used to answer so many in one day but I feel like being so open has left me vulnerable to a bit of entitlement from rude anons. Trying to keep up the pretense of a very active blog has left me a little drained and made me realize I created Infamous for one thing: to write! So I've started prioritizing my space to just write Infamous without feeling like I have to be active all the time on the blog. I have a lot of fun talking about Infamous on amyreads because I feel like there's no expectations here. I can just chat casually about it without feeling like people will take my word as law and then start having OPINYUNS about it nshsids ofc this is about like....0.5 percent of the people on the blog, everyone else has been so lovely and great :,) but even the negative minority can feel so loud because my brain just latches onto every bad thing about me. yeah yeah

As for the bonus content, you're right! I do need to be careful ahh I think it helps that I *want* to write these POV chapters so it doesn't feel like much of an obligation. I've had a lot of fun being able to focus on one scene that's already written and I can just remix it. But yeah, I will make sure to be a bit more mindful of my own limits <3

and it's not rude at all! I really appreciate it, it's nice to know there's someone out there thinking of me! As for saying no...HSHDBSDH it's very hard i hate disappointing people but omg ur right, i have such a hard time putting my foot down i don't like the idea of someone upset at me hshhsdbsdh

once again, thank you :,) this was nice to read. i hope you like whatever i have planned for the story :>

#inbox #<3333

[cdaae]

Hi, I know this is long but I wanted to talk about this, cause I don't think I can on my personal account. Reading everything about the POTO author is very disappointing to me. I read the first book and looked forward to the sequel. I did have some qualms about the two characters of color and I was concerned in how one of them perpetuates the "Woc is only there as support for their white friend" trope, but I was hoping this would get improved with the sequel. As I've been going through the sequel though, more of my concerns are being validated. There's frequent use of slurs regarding mixed-race people and said character is still only used as character development for Christine. Also, despite the author claiming they created Christine to be relatable to all people, its very hard to imagine her as anything but white/white passing when confirmed characters of color in the series are constantly degraded and dismissed for being Brown and Black. Now reading all the history regarding the author, I'm not surprised the characters of color are being treated this way. As a Black phan that loves Phantom immensely, it's sometimes hard being in this space and even being an e/c shipper when a lot of the aesthetics in this franchise are focused on whiteness and associating it with purity and good. While this series alone has its issue, I do think its important to note that a lot of Phantom work has issues regarding race whether its stereotyping (Kay) or erasure (ALW) so its a little unfair to single out this one creator. However, maybe this could be a good opportunity in analyzing the racial issues regarding this franchise as a whole! I'm genuinely thinking of writing my own version of POTO with e/c being poc because it's a perspective not explored yet

Thanks for listening! Love your account!

I don't necessarily feel it's unfair but she's also not being singled out for her racism in a phantom work but rather the fact that she's not only racist but a serious bully and is continuing both of these behaviors using her work and her platform. Race is definitely a phandom issue, but it's not the only issue with this particular author. Not to take away from anything you said though- you're absolutely valid in your assessment of the phandom.

The fascination with Kay has always bothered me- I could never get into it because of the problematic elements, but it's still something you have to be aware of when navigating the phandom because it's so popular. I actually think it's quite funny because this author dislikes Susan Kay but they're extremely similar- Older women clearly horny for the phantom and clearly writing with ALW in mind claiming to be adding on to Leroux but just making a mediocre book that doesn't fit in his canon at all with some added racism for good measure.

And yeah, her Christine sounds lifted out of ALW, and honestly, so does the phantom, since she still gave him a white mask. She also seemed to argue that Christine should be a brunette in the show because it looks better on women of color over blonde and that didn't sit right with me. Women of color with dark hair keep the "Christine look" according to her.

I'm disappointed but not surprised that the second book has the same issues. It's such an unnecessary thing to add to a phantom story. Meanwhile she had a video a while back essentially bragging about adding pocs and queer characters to her story like she's making strides for representation.

I do hope you write your poc phantom. Our phandom does need more representation, but it needs to come from the right place. You might also enjoy Music of the Night by Angela Ford. I haven't read it(yet), but I was told that Christine is black and the cover art supports this. But I don't think I've seen one where Erik and Christine both are poc.

Thank you for voicing your thoughts and please let me know if you write that story <3