#sorry for making polls again even if its a gag poll

[riacte]

🛸 exterrasexymenpoll Follow

THE RED KING from TEAM DOGWARTS and BLUE BATS

vs

HAND OF THE KING from TEAM DOGWARTS

Please stop mentioning the Blue Stalker in our comments. They have caused a lot of distress for the Exterra community, no matter how “sexy” they are or “how many bitches” they get.

Once again, we condone voter fraud, but we draw the line at spamming our polls with links to the enemies to lovers Blue Stalker x Red King fic.

🎇 thestarsweremadeforus Follow

OFHHDFJSJDJS ITS HERE!!! DIVORCE POST!!! HAND VS KING the boyfriends are fighting!!!

Not gonna lie I was so absorbed in the potential hilarity of this matchup that I failed to realise I have to vote for someone now. I’m. Im genuinely torn 😭😭😭

💄 gaysloveqoh Follow

stop saying treebark is divorcing when they BOTH are on qoh’s side 😭 they’re united in their respect for our queen 😤

anyways idk what to do now that blueballs is out. anyone wanna make an alliance with the ballgurls 🥰

🦇 starshipspachelbel Follow

You’re right, the gays DO love qoh (gays being treebark)

This is so cruel, putting the king against his loyal hand… I am drowning, there is no sign of land, you are coming down with me, hand in unlovable hand…

#RKSWEEP though (I say with tears in my eyes)

👽 blueballs Follow

sorry but the blue stalker DOES get all the bitches 😎 more sexyman energy than xisuma exterra void anyway

anyways im endorsing red king LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOO

👑 princeofhearts Follow

To the #HEARTSWEEP people mourning their loss, why vote for [deadname] when you can vote for his transitioned self, the Hand of the King? Stop being so fixated on [deadname], he’s still RK’s gunner 😭

Btw the ship wars between RK x Hand vs RK x QoH are so stupid like the Hand and QoH are the same people???? Some miraculous laserbug love square type of bullshit? Anyways I support the prince of hearts 🙏

🍬 gunnerwithashotgun Follow

@/princeofhearts ur a freak, stfu!!! queen of hearts and hand of the king are TOTALLY different ppl (they have different bioneos colours) and ur being lumianphobic by thinking theyre the same even tho they're just the same SPECIES (they even have different cultures like the hand keeps on roasting rk for calling tuski "pearl" bc that's the way qoh learned it??)

🪓 handoftheking Follow

I’m adding “not False Symmetry / Queen of Hearts” to my bio. Like, she’s super cool, but I’m unfortunately not her.

Anyways, vote for me over that old man. You’re not letting a potato win, right?

💫 concorp-official Follow

Vote for the Red King! Show a screenshot that you voted for him at any ConCorp intergalactic outlet and receive a 5% discount, effective today!

⏳ rensanddaddy Follow

NOT THE OBVIOUS BRIBERY FROM MR CUB HIMSELF.... we need to vote harder for the Hand!! Just look at his blonde ass hair and blue dishwasher detergent freckles!! He's so pathetic and a meow meow and I want to lovingly crush him against the walls of a spaceship (im not the blue stalker i promise)

🐙 doctagon Follow

... guys. i. The actual Exterra official account on twt sent out the link to this poll?? The ACTUAL account?? We've breached so many layers of containment???????

🪓 handoftheking Follow

... Okay, that miiiight be my fault? It's good PR for us, right? We're the two sexiest racers in the Exterra industry on the podium together. It's good for our image, and maybe people will FINALLY stop truthing I'm transgender QoH

🌲 dilfkisser Follow

I hope we get a perfect 50/50 tie. I want homoerotic RK and his homoerotic Hand to both win. I want them to stand on the podium and make out while holding a pride flag while BlueBalls beatboxes in the shadows. I hope we all win. (Except the transgender lumian theory believers, go touch some stardust)

#unreality #polls #treebark #trafficshipping #space opera au #.... yeah #sorry for making polls again even if its a gag poll #spopera martyn is indeed a pathetic meow meow but spopera false is even more of a pathetic meow meow #theyre all pathetic meows meows. dumb ass blorbo trio i love them 😭 #tw unreality

[just-another-ficwriter]

Meant To Be – Part One

Pairing: Stripper!Sweet Pea x Cooper!Reader

Words: 1300ish

Warnings: Alcohol, male strippers, swearing

Summary: When Polly’s bachelorette party ends up at a Magic Mike style show Y/N can’t help but be drawn to one act, Sweet Pea. Much to her surprise, when he over hears her current family dilemma he’s more than willing to help.

Notes: A total cliche fake dating fic that I’m using part one of to fill the Stripper AU square on my @riverdalebingo card!

 You can feel the music pumping under your feet, your head a little fuzzy from the countless number of shots. You’d all drunk enough to rival a group of new college students at their first frat party and showed no signs of slowing down.

You almost laugh now when you think of how stressed you'd been at the start of the day.

It was no secret that planning your sister Polly's bachelorette party had both you and Betty worrying over the slightest of details, but the night had been a hit.  

You'd started off with afternoon tea at a small elegant restaurant, which Veronica had swiftly labelled boring but quietly ate her delicately cut sandwiches after Betty insisted the day would get more exciting. After that you'd bar hopped your way through colourful cocktails and bottles of spirits until you all stumbled to your final destination of the night.

An upscale, all male dancer venue that even had Cheryl and Toni blushing.

Polly, who currently had a face full of glitter and a pink fluffy tiara tangled in her hair had claimed it was one the best nights of her life. And while the Bride To Be was being pulled up on the stage by a sea of hunky, half naked men, you knew you should be cheering along with the rest, shoving crumped dollar bills into g-strings but something else had caught your eye.

Or rather someone else.

To the left of the stage, with his hips rolling and a prominent deep V that disappeared into his barely there shorts, you found it hard to look away.

At the same moment as you were shamelessly watched the way the spotlight glides down his toned torso, he turns and catches your eye. Your heart suddenly slams into your chest, and you blush furiously, a deep dark red. You must have got it wrong; he can't be looking at you. Not like that.

But then he smiles right at you, rows of bright teeth luminated under the glaring lights before pulling his bottom lip between them, and you’re sure it wasn't for Betty clinging onto your arm your legs wouldn't be able to hold you up under the weight of his stare.

-

“To a successful night.” Betty lifts her shot glass, knocking it against your own with a soft clink.

“To the Cooper twins, pulling it off again.” You both grin in triumph, tossing the liquid back before laughing at the way the other grimaces as it burns its way down your throat.  

“Yeah well, planning this is going to be a breeze compared to spending time back in Riverdale.” Betty reminds you with a deep sigh, and the grimace returns to your face instantly.

“Don’t remind me.” Your eyes roll before you signal for another round. Anything to make you forget about the thought of your hometown and all the things you’d fought so hard to escape seven years ago. “Oh Y/N, isn’t it time you settled down? Don’t you want move out that apartment into a real home.”

Betty giggles at the way you mimic your mother’s voice, before straightening her shoulders and doing the same. “Or when are you going to give me more grandchildren.”

The two of you knock back the next shot, barely flinching this time. “I hate that one.”

“At least you have Jug. Polly’s about to marry Jason and they have the twins.” Your voice fades off with your thoughts. Maybe it was the alcohol talking, intensifying the insecurities that hide in the back of your mind, but your eyes were already glazed over before you spoke again. “What do I have?”

“A job at one of the best newspapers in town.” She reaches over and places her hand over yours, squeezing it slightly in silent reassurance in a way that tell you you’ll always have her too.

You scoff, attempting to switch the mood back to a lighter one. “Oh please, that’ll keep her entertained for all of five minutes.”

Betty barely has time to argue back before she’s interrupted by a pair of warm brown eyes and a cheeky smile.

“Sorry I couldn’t help but hear.” He pauses so he can look you up and down, his eyes boldly lingering longer than they had when he was on stage. “Are you looking for a date to a wedding?”

Anticipation pulses through your body and suddenly you forget how to speak. But Betty notices the tension straight away and jumps at the opportunity to tease you. “Why are you offering?”

“I guess I kind of am.” He pulls a card from his back pocket and hands it to you with a smirk that has you imagining all kinds of things. “If you’re still stuck when the time comes, give me a call.”

And then he’s gone, disappearing past a group of cheering women leaving you wide eyed and still speechless.

“What’s it say?” Your sister squints to get a better look.

“Need a date for a wedding? Or someone to impress the parents? Call dial-a-date for all your fake dating needs.” You raise one eyebrow as you read it out loud, fighting the urge to fake gag. “What kind of cringy shit is this?”

“That kind that you might need.” You stare at her like she has two heads, she can’t honestly be serious; can she? “The others are too drunk to remember him; I can play along. Admit it he’s hot.”

You turn the card over between your fingers before tracing the name scribbled on the back. “Sweet Pea.”

-

At 2am, as the night finally winds down, getting Polly home seems like an impossible task.

With the plastic tiara still clinging on her hair for dear life and wobbly footsteps despite the fast she’s twirling her heels around in her hands, you almost give in and collapse before you even hit the second floor.

She’s still singing away to herself, giggling at some unspoken joke as you settle her on the couch with a blanket and a glass of water.

“My little sister looking after me, when did you get so grown up?” She asks with a hiccup. You fight the overwhelming urge to remind her that Betty’s only three minutes older than you, like you had your whole childhood and just laugh along with her instead.

“Get some sleep Polls.” You pat her shoulder and stumble to your feet, bumping into things as you make your way around the apartment.

Maybe getting Polly back was so difficult because you’re almost as drunk as her.

It isn’t until your almost in bed, fumbling for your phone that’s hidden in your bag that you remember the tall mysterious Adonis you’d met at the club.

His card is stuck to your screen as you pull it out and you heart instantly skips a beat.

This has to be a sign, right?

You quickly make your decision, barely giving yourself time to think twice before your dialing the number, your pulse accelerating with every ring.

You let out a shaky breath when it goes to his voicemail.

“Hi Sweet Pea, it’s uh, Y/N- not that you know who that is- oh god.” You pull a face at the sound of your own voice and hope it doesn’t sound as stupid as it does in your own head. “You gave me your card in the club? You probably don’t remember… anyway I was just wondering how this would work? Maybe you could call me back? Okay bye.”

You hang up, throwing the phone like it’s suddenly made of fire and collapse face first onto the bed.

What the hell had you just done?

Riverdale Winter Bingo Masterlist

Sweet Pea Masterlist

Forever Taglist: @p-marie-sp

Sweet Pea Taglist: @80sand90simagine @wildberryyyy @hopelesslylosttheway

Meant To Be Taglist: @t-a-i-l-o-r-m-a-d-e

#riverdale #riverdale bingo #riverdale winter bingo #riverdale au #riverdale series #riverdale fanficton #riverdale sweet pea #riverdale imagine #sweet pea #sweet pea x reader #sweet pea fanfiction #sweet pea au #sweet pea series #cooper!reader

[katyatalks]

Mob Psycho 100 II - Kameda Yoshimichi’s Character Design Notes

With each blu-ray/DVD volume of MP100 II Character Designer Kameda Yoshimichi gives some notes regarding his process designing each character. Here are all his notes for S2 in the order they are presented, regarding; Shinra Banshoumaru, Emi, Mogami Keiji, Joudou Kirin, Asagiri Minori, The Urban Legends, Shimazaki Ryou, Hatori Nozomu, Minegishi Toshiki, Shibata Hiroshi, Suzuki Touichirou & Serizawa Katsuya.

SHINRA BANSHOUMARU

My highly recommended character from season 2, Shinrin Maruo! … that’s not his name, it’s Shinra Banshoumaru!! I super, super love Shinra to the point where it’s unbearable, and I even put him into season 1!!! Do you know where, though? These lovable, chubby characters - they’re lacking in recent anime, but I figured I’m in the position to change that!! I made him bigger than he is in the manga and upon drawing his rough design, Director Tachikawa told me I was going too far and had me draw a retake. I was like a bulldozer - ‘That’s so stupid!’ - so I managed to save his nice body (laughs).

After episode 2 he doesn’t appear at all, but please be sure to love Shinrin!!! How about a spin-off!? “Shinrin Psycho 100”, how’s that!?!?!? Ah, Shinra, actually. Sorry.

EMI

The amount of people who wanted to see this story animated!!!! Since it usually ranks either first or second place in polls that assess the most popular story in the Mob Psycho 100 manga, we figured we’d have season 2 start with it, and since it’s such a popular part, there was an agreement that I’d be animation director for it! Which I was enthusiastic about, until - huh? Episode 2 has Shinra Banshoumaru? Then, I’ll do episode 2! And with that, I left episode 1 in the hands of Yoshida-san! It’s a story with drama at its heart, and that’s what Yoshida-san specialises in, so I was happy with that!!! I’m pleased with Emi-chan’s hair colour. I made it a caramel-pink. My type 100%.

MOGAMI KEIJI

Truth is, work on Mob Psycho 100 II began from Episode 5. Because of that, the first of the fresh new characters to be drawn was Mogami. Just before getting to work on Mob Psycho 100 II I’d been working on something else where the proportions are quite short, so I kept in mind that I had to make sure that didn’t affect my designs here - as a result, for the first rough draft for Mogami, I had him with full on shoulder pads so he’d look taller, in a Saeba Ryou kinda vibe (laughs). Well, maybe not as far as Saeba Ryou. As expected, following a check with the director I was told the balance of his body isn’t Mob Psycho-ish!  And now his design is as it is. And yet… maybe it would’ve been nice to have his shoulders be raised, just a little?? In the manga he’s quite a handsome man, but my Mogami isn’t that handsome… that’s regrettable.

JOUDOU KIRIN

I have Joudou-sensei wear a kesa [Buddhist priest’s robe] in the anime - it’s pretty cute, isn’t it? Something I paid attention to was the lines from where his kesa ends to his tip toes! He appears in episodes 4-7 and more so than Mogami does, but he’s fun to draw. His deformation in episode 4 was super funny, so we included more of those (laughs). However, the wrinkles on his forehead and his hair barcode are a bit of trouble, and he’s got three rosaries on, and vertical stripes on his kesa… a lot of lines, and animating all those lines is a delicate matter. Also, he has huge eyes. They must get dry easily, I’m sure that’s tough for him.

ASAGIRI MINORI

We get three design variations for Minori - the one in the bed, the one that’s possessed by Mogami, and the one wearing Salt Middle School’s sailor uniform. Her chipped nails while she’s lying in the bed are an anime original. I wanted something in her design that’d counter her cute face. Above everything, what stands out in her design is her hair colour!!!! Her final design has her with purple hair, but at first I imagined her with a cute pink, like Minky Momo-chan. However, the pink hair didn’t really match with her skin colour and overall ghastliness when she’s possessed by Mogami, so after a revision, I went for purple. The way she is now… well, she’s cute, but I think pink hair would’ve been reeeeeeally cute! There’s not many illustrations in the manga where the characters are given colour, so it was very fun getting to choose colours for the anime!

URBAN LEGENDS

With the characters that appear in the Urban Legend Arc, it was super fun to envision how they might move around, and what details to add and/or remove!! Regarding Wriggle Wriggle from episode 1, in order to give a sense of scale in comparing its height with Mob’s, on its character sheet I drew it with an extreme use of perspective. An angle similar to that image gets used in the anime.

In episode 2, Red Raincoat is as he is in the manga, but The Dragger dragging her dolls behind her is an original design. I gave the three dolls she drags a sense of individuality & a ghastly feel, then thought about wetting her clothes and skirt with mud and rain, deciding to make her simple. The dragger has very long hair, which appeals to my 80s-anime-loving taste. I guess when it comes to original designs I always drag out something that I’ve been stocking in my own drawers (laughs).

On the other hand, with Dash Granny all we see of her is her running blurry form, so even on her character sheet her references are all smeared - kinda like me declaring, ‘right, I’m the animation director for episode 2, so let me handle drawing the granny.’ (Laughs).

Season 2 is filled with a lot of deep stories, so if we get to continue the Mob Psycho 100 anime, I’d like for us to do more light-hearted stories where cases related to urban legends are solved like this!!

SHIMAZAKI RYOU

The member of the Ultimate Five who gets the most time in the spotlight, Shimazaki - easy to draw, isn’t he?? His eyes are lines, the corners of his mouth are a little lifted - just draw that and there you go! Shimazaki! He fights with Teru-kun twice -  episodes 9 and 11 - but I’ve been told that the jersey Teru-kun wears from episode 10 onwards is quite perplexing (laughs). In the manga it’s a black jersey… of course I know that. It’s just… he fights Shimazaki, who has a black colour scheme, and then Mob and Sakurai also have black colour schemes… Suzuki is more or less the same, as is Koyama, so to say. Way too many characters with a black colour scheme. Having all these characters with black colour schemes in one scene? That’s a No, Thanks from me. With all that blackness, you wouldn’t be able to understand who’s who!!!!!! Huh? You’d understand because Teru is blonde? W-well...

HATORI NOZOMU

You noticed, right? Hatori’s very cute pigeon [hato] crest!! A crest I highly recommend! … and yet, Hatori doesn’t appear much, does he… plus, the pigeon really didn’t stand out at all either (laughs). As much as I could, I’d leave the style of clothing that each character wears in the manga more or less the same for their anime design, then apply colour, then add a design that matches the character - designing their clothes was fun! Teru-kun’s jersey has a seagull, and Koyama’s hoodie has a spiral-like design - I think it’d be fun to search for these designs!! Actually, why does Teru-kun’s jersey have a seagull on it, you might ask?? Well, flip the seagull upside down… and you get someone standing… pigeon toed!

MINEGISHI TOSHIKI

I felt like the kinds of plants Minegishi manipulates would be of a carnivorous nature, so I ended up learning a lot of stuff when I was doing research! When thinking of carnivorous plants, what immediately springs to mind is Rafflesia! Even when reading illustrated encyclopaedias as a kid, I thought Rafflesia plants looked pretty scary. I’d read something about ‘man-eating plants’ and thought to myself, man, I want that to be about Rafflesia - I looked it up and it was! It stinks, so it’s as if it eats both humans and insects! I feel sorry for it - it’s just a stinky flower. Also, I made a big discovery!! Seems like you can drink the digestive fluids of pitcher plants!!! *gags*. Apparently you can only drink it before they catch insects, but it’s close to being germ-free, so please, drink without worry! Also, in Malaysia or somewhere like that, it seems they put rice inside the mouth of a pitcher plant, then steam and eat it, like bamboo chimaki [Rice dumpling wrapped in bamboo leaves]. ...In a pitcher plant… really…? *gags* *gags again*. With venus flytraps, too, people put minced meat in their mouths and grill them or something… those of you who own carnivorous plants; please, give it a go!! But the result is your own responsibility!!!

SHIBATA HIROSHI

He brings the pressure in episode 10 - when I read the manga, I felt this incomparable atmosphere when Shibata transforms and roars noisily around. I think the anime was amazing in amping that up! Looking at the manga, when Shibata’s on his rampage, he takes on more of a swarthy tone. So when I came to choose his colours for the anime, I first had his skin tone be pretty dark, but I felt like that didn’t give the same impact as it did in the manga, so I proposed giving him a scarlet tone as if he came from the Asura realm! And I’m glad I had the sense to! Actually, speaking on this now, he’s kinda like The Hulk (laughs). I guess it would’ve been funny if I made his skin green.

SUZUKI TOUICHIROU

Truth is, I’d finalised Suzuki’s design during season 1. Only because he appears for a split second during the final episode, though (laughs). But, while working on the main story, something I noticed with my design that troubled me was that alongside being slender and baby-faced, his height left something to be desired… so he didn’t look like a boss character in the slightest. After I finished work on the final episode, I thought it’d be good to make his face a little longer, ie. more mature. To make him appear more aggressive, I tried to make his eyes smaller, but then his design strayed too far from his manga self. Of all the things that caused me grief, the worst one of them all was his hair - does he have a jagged hairline because he’s brushed his hair back, or is the jaggedness there a very short fringe due to him having short hair? After I finished work on the final episode, I unexpectedly had the chance to see ONE-sensei, live, drawing Suzuki - from there, my problem was solved!!! Jagged hair (laughs). (It’s due to him having short hair, right?) I apologise for never grasping the true form of his hair, right up to the end.

SERIZAWA KATSUYA

Translated previously here.

--

Twitter crosspost here.

Season 1 notes here.

#mp100 #mob psycho 100 #my stuff #shinra banshoumaru #emi #mogami keiji #joudou kirin #asagiri minori #shimazaki ryou #hatori nozomu #minegishi toshiki #shibata hiroshi #suzuki touichirou #serizawa katsuya #booklet #kameda yoshimichi

[edwardslostalchemy]

God it's so nice to see someone who doesn't like Bakugou, THANK YOU😭. Sometimes I feel so fucking alone in this fandom cause everywhere I look there are ppl praising Bakugou and saying that he's the best, I have no fucking idea how he keeps winning popularity polls🤢🙄. And I HATE that Deku puts him on a pedestal. Horikoshi saying that Bakugou has to apologise gives me hope but I think that it'll happen super late and that it'll be written like a super bad apology so yeah... what do you think?

YEAH Idk where his popularity comes from when he's a shitty character who yells at everyone and calls them names. Its just really weird to me. It doesn't make sense to me at all because he's a bully that told Izuku to kill himself and that's something I'm never going to let slide like ever since the first time I watched the show, it really hit me and I even mentioned it to my little brother, who introduced me to the show. Its just...that just hit my heart you know? And then he doesnt get any better. I see people saying he's improving and he's getting development, but I can't see it? Like if he's doing something, it's not even that Great. Like wow he saved a person. That's...that's exactly what a hero should do yeah. But none of that erases what he has done to Izuku which is 10+ years of abuse. He hurt him so much verbally and physically. How do you just ignore that? And I also see people argue "we can enjoy a character and still acknowledge their flaws", but like? I still fail to understand. Like I'm sorry, I just don't enjoy characters that are assholes. ...actually I'm not sorry. I am also really annoyed with Izuku excusing his behavior or just...Not reacting to it. Like I get he is super kind and caring and forgiving, but I also feel like hero society has shaped his opinion. K*tsuki has a strong quirk, therefore he is fit to be a hero. But I'm not sure if Izuku connects abuse to heroism, or lack thereof. Like I really wonder if after Shouto told him about his abusive father, Izuku started to change the way he saw k*tsuki.

I've wanted an apology since like last decade because it's just too much. If he is going to keep being an important character, Horikoshi has to give us a balance. Its becoming increasingly difficult to enjoy this series by having him as one of the protagonists when he is a piece of shit. He yelled at his hosts during the family dinner despite knowing how heavy the subject Shouto and Fuyumi were discussing was for them. I'm never going to let them go because when you talk about something important like that between you another person, the last thing you want is for a 3rd party to yell at you. That just peeved me so much. And he also stabbed Izuku on his head with his accessory and he bled because of that. And nobody reported him. The boys showed concern, but like who intervened? Nobody. Its so annoying. He hasn't changed at all if he's still hurting Izuku. And now its played as a gag, how disgusting. Thanks Horikoshi, for playing off his bullying as a joke, real clever of you, that's exactly what I needed. 😒

Anyways yeah I want a good apology, but because Horikoshi bends over backwards to kiss k*tsuki's ass, I don't know if he will give us a good apology. I hope he does. Because it's what Izuku deserves AT LEAST. At most, he deserves to get away from him because he's so toxic and he needs to heal. So what I would totally LOVE is for Izuku to not only get an apology, but also to spend time away from him. I know from experience that I healed a lot after I spent time away from the person that bullied me in elementary school and I am healing now because I am away from the person that really hurt me. At least the latter apologized to me, but the bully didn't. She never stopped her behavior until I was in a different class from her and I became more confident because of that. When I had a class with her again in high school, she couldn't do anything to me because I was savage. I would have eaten her face off with sass. I'm not trying to say Izuku should totally do this, but Izuku should totally do this. But anyway back to the topic. Izuku deserves better. He has better friends and classmates now, but wouldn't it just be amazing if class 1St and Aizawa and All Might found out that he bullied Izuku "Sunshine" Midoriya? God that would just be cathartic. I would legit frame that on my wall and personally thank Horikoshi for my existence. An apology would be such a gift, though. And k*tsuki also acknowledging that what he did was WRONG and he will try to be a better person and a better friend. Because as it stands now, he does not regret anything he did. He still treats Izuku like shit and he is still a Grade A+ Asshole. So if Horikoshi does not do hustice to the apology, then it will be horrible writing honestly. Like I am afraid for this event because we are getting a damned redemption for endeav*r and that bastard abused his entire family in different ways and just NOW realized he did wring. Its too late, sir, you messed up 5 people, good job, you selfish bastard. K*tsuki is still a 16 year old twerp, so lets hope he'll change and get the proper development he so desperately needs. If Horikoshi butchers it then that'll be a dann shame. I have one fear for the series and this is it. Either we get a shit apology or we get no apology at all. I'm not sure if this answers your question, but I felt like this would 've a good answer.

#anti bakugou #asks #thebipanfangirl #i went off oof #you guys give me fuel and i turn it into fire #i hope this is what you were looking for? #i went on so many tangents that i kept forgetting to stay objective #anyways remember to stan izuku

[kaithedumbass02]

A Friend In Need [Fetish Warning]

(FETISH WARNING FOR THIS, IF YOU DON'T LIKE FETISH STUFF I HIGHLY SUGGEST THAT YOU DON'T READ THIS, but if you are ok with this sorta stuff, feel free to read it)

(ok so I did a poll for if I should do a fart story or vore story and...fart story won, a Soul Eater related one, and if I'm being honest, I actually like how this came out, even if a few things did cause some problems but those are fixed now)

It was night-time, a rather creepy looking moon was suspended in the night sky, it gave a rather creepy air, but the brightly shining stars countered that creepy atmosphere. There where buildings everywhere, some houses, some shops, the cobblestone streets, which where kind of small and cramped, matched the houses in terms of the cobblestone look, there was also a few people out, all varying in age, size and shape.

Out of all these people, one stood out the most, he had short pink hair, a rather shy and depressed facial expression, had a long and thin body build, and wore a black dress, he was shaking slightly, he seemed to be nervous about something.

"i-im not sure how I'll handle this...I d-don't like being around too many people..." he voice was shaking quite a bit, after he shakily admitted this, a small black creature with white facial features popped out of the boy's back. "oh come on, it's not like anything will happen, remember what your friend said?" the creature spoke, it had a high but low-pitched voice. "I k-know Maka said she would make sure that nothing would happen to me...b-but still..." he responded to the creature. "your such a wimp Crona, how many times did she reassure you that nothing would happen? Oh well, it's no use talking to you, nothing will make you calm down" the creature responded once again, disappearing back into Crona's back, he just let out a shaky sigh as he approached the academy.

He shyly opened the door and quietly walked in, no one noticed him walk in, but as he turned around to go and close the door, someone jumped on his back, causing him to yell out and punch whoever jumped on him straight in the face causing them to send them pretty far. "wha--Black Star! I told you not to jump on him from behind" a female voice rang out, it was Maka, and she looked pretty mad. "you moron! How many times did I say not to do that when he came! How many times?!" she angrily said to the blue haired boy called Black Star, she angrily grabbed his coller and shook me back and forth. "u-umm...i-its ok Maka..." Crona's shy voice rang out.

His voiced calmed her down, and made her drop Black Star. "your right, I'm sorry about that...actually, hey come with me" she said happily as she walked off, giving the sign to follow her, which both Black Star and Crona did.

The three of them came to a HUGE room, besides from the size, there wasn't anything special about it, but there was quite a few people there, Black Star just ran off, to do something stupid most likely, leaving Maka and Crona with each other. "H-hey Crona? I'm sorry about bringing you here...you didn’t have to come you know" she admitted sounding a bit guilty. "o-oh no its ok Maka...I'm just not used to being around large groups of people..." he answered, trying to make her feel better.

Maka giggled a bit, and so did Crona, after a few minutes they saw Black Star walking towards them, surprisingly he wasn't running, they saw that he had a glass in his hand. "Hey Crona, I'm sorry about what I did before...so I got you something to drink" he offered, the drink was a white liquid, it was obviously milk, but Crona seemed to be a bit hesitant to accept it. "hm? Is something wrong?" Black Star asked, tilting his head a little. "u-umm...n-nothing's wrong" Crona said, nervously accepting the drink, slowly drinking it, he looked like he was about to gag and throw up, Maka noticed that but he managed to stomach and finish it, he thanked Black Star for it, he obviously didn’t know that he didn't like milk but at least he tried to make up for before.

Black Star was basically overjoyed that he accepted his apology...but like always he got cocky afterwards, Maka watched him unimpressed, while Crona just giggled at his idiotic behaviour, as the hours went by, everything was great, everyone was having fun, playing games, just what you'd except, by the time the gathering ended and dispersed, everyone was exhausted.

"heh...im happy you enjoyed tonight Crona, I missed seeing that smile" Maka said to him, having a bright and happy smile. "h-heh...I g-guess it was a good idea for me to come anyway...I have to tha--" Crona got cut off from his sentence when a roaring gurgle came from him stomach, causing him to wrap his arms around his stomach and blush intensely. "A-are you ok C-crona?" Maka asked out of sheer worry. "u-ugh...I t-think it was the milk from before...i-im lactose intolerant...t-that’s why I was so hesitant to take it..." he put a hand on his mouth, letting out a loud and guttural burp, causing him to blush more.

Maka thought for a few seconds, thinking if she could do anything to help Crona with this problem, it quickly clicked and she hit him in the back, the force of the hit caused him to let out one long, wet, and disgusting sounding belch, even though there was only him and Maka around, his face went so red, he got really mad at her for not being told what she was going to do, his stomach gurgled again, he looked down at his stomach and then at Maka, he smiled evilly as he tackled her to the ground, putting his rather bubbly rear in her face.

Maka was caught off guard from this, and not only that, out of all people, she didn't except him to have an ass this...kinda nice looking, and she kind of liked it, but she didn't like it once the gas started coming, the dry and airy farts lasted for 4 minutes, leaving a smell of spoiled milk and mud hanging in the air, he had barely even started and Maka's nose was already burning from the vile stench.

She tried to convince Crona to get off her, but she should have told him what she was going to do before, his sadistic side was starting to show now, the next batch of toxic gas was beefy and meaty, both the sound and smell was absolutely disgusting, this hell of a blast lasted for a bit over 15 minutes, after it ended, he moaned loudly from the relief, he may have started to feel better but the one underneath was the complete opposite, her nose was on fire, her eyes where watering, she could barely even breathe underneath him, it was absolute hell.

His stomach let out one loud and mean groan, this was going to be the worse by far, the wet, bubbly, and absolutely disgusting sound, was almost too much to bare, and the strong, eggy scent didn’t help either, this lasted for 3 minutes but thankfully it was the last of his noxious gas, as he quickly got off Maka, it's visible how bad it was, especially at point blank, her face was red from having to hold here breath, her nose was also red from how bad it was, Crona shyly looked down at her, its amazing that such monstrous gas could come out of someone so thin, Maka just stared back at him, obviously pissed for two reasons, one, her sense of smell seemed to have left her for a bit, and two, the stench was going to hang around her for awhile, this was going to makes things awkward for the both of them.

END

#literature #eproctophilia #soul eater #crona #maka albarn #please don't hate me for this #people wanted me to do it

[trobwriter]

Fake news, 1998 style

The following is FAKE NEWS! It is NOT REAL!

If the term fake news had existed in 1998, perhaps we would have worked it into the April Fool’s Day story that appeared in the newspaper’s feature section. That’s right, we intentionally faked an outlandish story and ran it as if it was all true.

Man, was it a different time. Things were flush in the dead-tree publishing business. We felt our oats, so to speak. And the paper had run an April Fool’s joke or two before, so there was precedent. So the features editor, formerly the sports editor, had an idea to perpetrate another harmless, and hopefully humorous, joke on April 1. He asked me to take part, i.e. to write the thing. But write what? I huddled with him and few other features people about a week out.

We decided on the following theme — a symbol was going to replace the name Hampton Roads that everybody hated.

That and other kernals of truth sprinkled among the text — arguing mayors, breathless politicians yearning for a sports franchise — lured in and confused people, just as we intended, even though the story (which is way too long, in hindsight) grew more ridiculous as it went. We knew this by the nastygrams we got in the aftermath, including from the paper’s editor, who evidently was not in on the joke ahead of time.

And yet nobody got fired!

I wrote it as M.R. Gilltaye. Say it fast, without the first period. The advertising firm  was named AFD (April Fool’s Day). And one of our designers came up with not only the yellow arrow (I don’t have a reproduction, sorry), he actually photoshopped a picture of a helicopter carrying the huge, inverted arrow to the unveiling at MacArthur Center. Damn brilliance. You had to read all the way to the final sentence to learn for sure it was a gag, and even then it didn’t really slap you in the face. But there was a disclaimer next to the story that definitively did confirm the fakery. Ha ha ha, you people. Get it? Huh? Huh?

Anyway, I saved the stupid thing, and I post it here — probably against all newspaper copyright rules, but oh well — as an enjoyable blast from the past, even if it is perhaps only enjoyable to me.

————————————————————————–

April 1, 1988

Symbol To Replace Region’s Name. Goodbye “Hampton Roads”

  By M.R. Gilltaye

Perhaps the most critical era of Southeastern Virginia dawns tonight with the unveiling of a new-age symbol to replace “Hampton Roads” as the prevailing identity for this region of 1.6 million people.

Six of the region’s mayors, and the president of the New York advertising firm that conceived the symbol at a cost of $3 million, will gather for a 7 p.m. ceremony at the MacArthur Center construction site in downtown Norfolk.

There, they will officially announce the retirement of Hampton Roads, the controversial and largely ineffective nickname that served the region locally and nationally for more than a decade.

In its place will be put a symbol, — a curved, upward pointing arrow, coincidentally resembling the universal traffic sing for “detour” –  that will represent the region, beginning immediately.

According to one region official who requested anonymity, the symbol “is overwhelmingly positive. It is emblematic of everything that is good and promising about our area and our people, about where we are and where we are going.”

It is also, the official admitted, “Our last, best hope at achieving regional consensus at the turn of the century. We hope this symbol is finally our ticket to the high quality of life, including a major-league sports franchise, that we all want and deserve.”

The symbol, the official said, was conceived with the wildly successful swoosh of the Nike athletic shoe company in mind. Also, The Artist (Formerly Known as Prince), who promotes himself with an untranslatable, but highly recognizable, symbol.

One look at those symbols, the official said, and people instantly know who and what they represent. “In our case the symbol will mean FHR, or Formerly Hampton Roads. We are to be referred to as FHR from this day forward.”

A strategic added bonus is that by resembling the detour sign, “FHR will receive incalculable free advertising around the world, ‘round the clock. Now it is up to our marketing people to make our brand internationally recognizable. When a woman in China sees the arrow, we want her to think, “I need to visit FHR.” The mind soars with possibilities.”

The symbol is the brainstorm of AFD Advertising, Manhattan marketing specialists who were contracted by the (Formerly ) Hampton Roads Partnership with public funds last year.

“I applaud the leaders of FHR for their incredible foresight and courage in taking this unprecedented step in municipal government,“ said Adam P. Feinbaum, AFD’s president.

“With this symbol as their trumpet, they will succeed in not only putting FHR on the map, but also in announcing that FHR is a bold and progressive location for businesses and families that only needs major sports to make it truly world class.

“Other up and coming cities have approached us about trading their names for symbols, but to my knowledge, FHR is the first to follow through”

In this case, necessity truly was the other of invention. In the spirit of regionalism, the mayors had met secretly for months, according to the official, trying to agree on a replacement for Hampton Roads.

All conceded that the nickname had failed miserably and, in fact, had created more confusion than clarification as to who what and where Hampton Roads was.

Apparently the deciding factor in changing the region’s name was a Gallup Poll of 3,689 households in the East and Midwest commissioned by the (Former) Hampton Roads Partnership. Asked to identify “Hampton Roads” on a map, a shocking 52% of adults pointed to various parts of the interstate highway system in 18 different states.

Seventeen percent actually said it was “somewhere in Virginia.” But 12 percent thought it was “a NASCAR track,” 9 percent pointed to waters off the island of Bermuda, and 8 percent answered “do not know/do not care.”

“That certainly was a swift kick in the pants, I must say,” the official said. “We knew it was bad. We just didn’t know how bad.”

The trouble was only starting, however. Repeated attempts by the mayors and their marketing arm to find a new, common name to tout the region’s charms proved prohibitive.

The provincial animosity that has scuttled a laundry list of would-be regional projects in the past flared mightily again, the official said, particularly between Norfolk’s Paul Fraim and Virginia Beach’s Meyera Oberndorf.

“At one point, when Meyera wasn’t looking, Paul actually winged her with a spitball and then pointed at (Portsmouth’s) Jim Holley,” the official said with a sigh. “Believe me, some of those meetings were not pretty.”

Ironically, words proved to be the effort’s undoing. The right ones for a new catch-name could not be found, or at least settled upon. (Among the suggestions that drew support were South Richmond, Just Folks, Thumbs Up!, Way North Carolina and, strangely, Palookaville.)

Finally, at hopeless loggerheads, the mayors turned to AFD, which has created and launched successful ad campaigns for Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes, Preparation H suppositories and Jaclyn Smith Kmart sportswear.

“We noshed with HR leaders, rattled around in their heads, spent the day off the coast watching porpoises. I mean dolphins. Whatever,” Finebaum said. “What I got was, please help us. We got Nordstrom’s, but we need more. We want sports. We want fame. We want it all. Make us real. Make us hot.”

Symbol, Feinbaum thought. Not words.

“Words are passé. Words are dead,” Finebaum said. “Visuals. Graphics. Something to see, to touch, something to suck into your brain and let grow. It’s a very aggressive process, and so we produced a very aggressive symbol. Such synergy. It really is breathtaking.”

A surprisingly simple symbol, the up-arrow starts straight, bends to the right and precedes upward. Feinbaum said it perfectly captures the positive spirit and FHR can-do attitude.

“In my discussions, I was impressed when one official told me the skies here are never partly cloudy, but mostly sunny,” Feinbaum said. “Another said it wasn’t a hurricane destroying Sandbridge but a brief and welcome sprinkle. Hey give me that attitude, I’ll make money for you all day.”

Feinbaum said the arrow denotes progression and reward, an indirect path to an unlimited future. “It reaches people on a pre-language level,” Feinbaum said. “It is engagingly postmodern, but in a primitive yet sophisticated sense. It’s asking questions, not providing answers. Instead of ‘Why?’ it’s saying ‘Why not?’ ’’

The arrow’s move to the right, Feinbaum said, is most important and of great intrinsic value.

“We read left-to-right, do we not?” Feinbaum said. “Going right, the eyes are active, they’re alive, bing, bing, bing. Plus, from a sheet of other symbols we have in development, 70% of our focus group remembered the FHR symbol the next day. This is significant. This is good.”

Each area city will continue to operate as a separate, nameless entity, the regional official said, but it will share the symbol, if not water. The next logical step is the removal of Hampton Roads from all highway signage, maps, monuments and brochures, replacing those words with the symbol.

In addition, letters must be written under a symbolic letterhead to the commissioner of each major league sports league so there is no confusion when they award their next expansion franchises.

“This is the start of something monumental,” the official said. “The only problem is, we really picked a lousy day for the announcement. No one’s going to believe it.”