#such is the way - that character is VERY raw

[aspoonofsugar]

Charlie and Vaggie: Anima and Animus

There's something that I've been dying to say More than anything, more than anything Need you to know I love you more than anything More than anything

Charlie and Vaggie have intertwined and complementary arcs, which are beautifully explored through the jungian archetypes of anima and animus.

WHAT ARE ANIMA AND ANIMUS?

According to Carl Jung, the anima and animus are parts of the human mind. In particular, the anima is the feminine and the animus is the masculine. Everyone has naturally both, but society promotes specific gender values and drives people to repress traits culturally associated with the opposite gender. So, to fully be complete, a person should integrate the negated part. In stories, this usually happens through a meaningful romantic relationship.

Charlie and Vaggie are two women, but they still exhibit opposite gender traits:

Charlie is a princess, who sings her heart out at every chance. She is focused on words, ideals, feelings and she strongly believes in love. All traditionally feminine traits.

Vaggie is a soldier, who shows pride in her fighting abilities. She is focused on actions, pragmatism, battles and she strongly believes in strength. All traditionally masculine traits.

And yet, things are not so simple. Let's consider Charlie and Vaggie's designs for example:

Charlie usually wears masculine clothes, as she prefers androgynus suits. Not only that, but her name means "free man" and she goes with the gender neutral "Charlie", rather than her given name "Charlotte":

Valentino: YEAH! That BITCH Chuckie or Chandler, or I dunno- Something mannish like that.

Vaggie usually wears feminine clothes, as she sports a short skirt and loose long hair. Even her name is linked to femininity, as it literally means "vagina":

Angel Dust: You're doing great, Vagina.

Even when it comes to Chaggie's The Nightmare Before Christmas's allusion...

Charlie references Jack Skellington, as she is the Princess of Hell and a passionate dreamer

Vaggie references Sally, as she is a run-away and Charlie's level-headed helper

So, Charlie seems superficially more feminine and Vaggie appears more masculine, but their looks and inspirations suggest otherwise. Why?

In truth, even if Charlie is a singing disney-like princess and Vaggie is a badass super-soldier, they don't perfectly fit the typical anima and animus characterization. This is true for their appearances and on a deeper level. Specifically:

Charlie is linked to the anima (feminine), but she is active (masculine) and stronger than Vaggie. Finally, even if she is passionate about feelings, she is often insensitive. For example, she doesn't notice her loved ones' struggles, like Angel's pain and Vaggie's insecurities.

Vaggie is linked to the animus (masculine), but she is reactive (feminine) and very sensitive deep down. Moreover, she is weaker than Charlie in terms of raw power, so her obsession with protecting the princess is misplaced.

Charlie is an anima character with a strong repressed animus and Vaggie is an animus character with a strong repressed anima. They have to integrate with each other to become whole. Still, what should they learn from their partner?

LOVE AND HATE

Charlie and Vaggie have the same problem declined in opposite ways:

Husk: Princess, is a bleeding heart who wants to solve everybody else's problems 'cept her own.

Husk about Vaggie: This one judges everyone and everything because she hates herself.

Charlie wants to fix everyone in an unconscious attempt to fix herself. She loves everyone because she herself wants to be loved.

Vaggie is cold and closed off out of guilt and self-hate. She is suspicious of everyone because she can't really forgive herself.

Both girls have low self-esteem, but Charlie tries to compensate with love, whereas Vaggie tries to defend with hate. These different coping mechanisms stem from their upbringings.

Charlie is the daughter of Lucifer and Lilith, who love her deeply, but are also distant and neglectful. As a result, she admires them, but feels unworthy of their attentions and legacy:

Lute: The only reason you're still here is because daddy gave you and your hellborn kind a pardon from an exorcist blade. How does that feel, to know how little you matter?

She is stuck being the lovable, but useless princess.

Vaggie is brought up in Adam's army, which is an abusive environment, where hate is seen as strength. Vaggie has a place in the world because she kills and is good at it:

Adam: You were on the front lines, I wouldn't forget a bad bitch like you. It's why I named you after the best thing ever. Vaggie. Anyway, you sure fucked up, didn't you?

She is stuck being the ruthless and remorseless soldier.

The path ahead for both girls lies in discovering they are more than just the princess and the soldier. In particular:

Charlie must accept she herself is capable of feeling negative emotions, like pain and anger. She can be aggressive and this doesn't make her mean. It makes her healthy.

Vaggie: Well, I mean… You're the princess of Hell. You don't really use the power that comes with that, which I love about you, but maybe you can… I don't know, command a little more… Authority? Charlie: But that's so mean. Vaggie: It's not mean, exactly. It's… uh, aggressive kindness.

Vaggie must learn to open up to others. She must show vulnerability and express her positive feelings more. She has a merciful and sensitive side, which doesn't make her weak. It makes her strong.

Chaggie have the potential to help each other bloom. Vaggie is the first person to tell Charlie she should be more self-assured in her role of Princess of Hell. Charlie is the first person, who takes care of Vaggie as she is hurt and unable to defend herself. Charlie can teach Vaggie to embrace her inner maiden (love, mercy). Vaggie can show Charlie how to be a real warrior (aggressivity, strength). At the same time, their opposite mentalities lead to some problems in their relationship.

TRUST FALLS (APART)

Charlie: I trust everyone, so maybe you know better on how to build it properly!

Angel Dust to Vaggie: To be fair, do you trust any man? Any men? Men?

Charlie trusts everyone, whereas Vaggie trusts no-one. So, none of them really knows how to trust properly. This becomes obvious in the episode Scramble Eggs, where:

Charlie trusts Vaggie so much she doesn't realize she is putting a lot of pressure on her partner:

Charlie: Oh, come on. It'll be easy! I'm sure you can handle this. Vaggie: Yeah, um, Sure, I can handle this. No problem.

Vaggie trusts Charlie so little she isn't able to confide nor lean on her partner:

Charlie: It's no big deal, Vaggie. You know, maybe I can just help, uh- Vaggie: No. I told you you could trust me, and I'm not going to let you down.

Charlie acts like the damsel and lets Vaggie handle the whole situation. Vaggie plays the knight and refuses to share the burden with Charlie:

So I, I'll be your armor Do whatever it takes, I'll make the mistakes I'll spend my life being your partner

The song Whatever It Takes plays the princess/knight motif straight. Vaggie sees herself as worthy of Charlie only if she can be her knight in shining armor. This may seem sweet, but there is something to be said about Vaggie echoing Carmilla, a mother who is singing to her daughters:

So I, I'll be your keeper Do whatever it takes, I'll make the mistakes I'll keep you safe and keep this secret

It makes sense for a parent to shoulder the burden for their kids' sake. However, a person wanting to do the same for their lover is unhealthy. Especially, when the secret of a balanced relationship is established early on:

Charlie: From the dust of Earth, they created Adam and Lilith, equals as the first of Mankind.

The two partners must be equals, but Vaggie sees herself as inferior to Charlie and tries to over-compensate. In this way, though, she takes away Charlie's agency. Charlie instead knows something is off deep down. However, she does not address the matter because she would need to go deeper into herself, her feelings and her relationships. And Charlie wants to avoid it at all costs.

Chaggie's communication issues are conveyed meta-narratively in Charlie and Vaggie's individual songs:

-Charlie's Happy Day in Hell has our princess sing so loud that she almost covers Vaggie's warning:

Charlie: If I can show them the dream I've dreamed That any soul can change! Vaggie: Those angels' minds are hard to change Charlie: Then they will know everyone can be redeemed From the evil to the strange! Vaggie: They're bloodthirsty and deranged!

She doesn't listen to Vaggie.

-Vaggie's Whatever It Takes is sung by our knight to her princess, but Vaggie has Charlie leave before the beginning:

Charlie: Vaggie, don't say that! You do so much! It's- Vaggie: I'm sorry. I'd… I'd like to be alone for a minute.

She doesn't talk to Charlie.

Eventually the couple's trust exercise is solved positively:

Charlie: No, no, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I put pressure on you. We work as a team. I guess I just thought all this would be easier, but, we'll figure it out, together. I mean, look what your exercise did for them.

Charlie goes out of her way to talk with Vaggie and Vaggie's team-building works. Charlie puts both her and Vaggie's feelings into words, whereas Vaggie builds trust through her actions.

Despite this, Chaggie don't really address their problems, which come back stronger:

Adam: Don't you act all high and mighty Did you ever think your little girlfriend might be a liar? Vaggie: Don't, Adam, please! Adam: What's the fuss? Why hide the fact that you're an angel just like us?

Charlie has been ignoring Vaggie's dark side, so she is devastated when it comes out. Vaggie instead has been hiding the truth from Charlie, so it is revealed in the worst way possible. After this, there is an inversion in Charlie and Vaggie's dynamic:

Vaggie: Charlie, can we talk about this-- Charlie: We can talk later. Right now, we have a job to do. You with us?

Vaggie is the one looking for a conversation, whereas Charlie pushes her girlfriend away. Before they can reconcile, the two girls need to go through individual trips and to find the guidance of two mentors.

A singer

A dancer

SINGING AND DANCING

Rosie and Carmilla are mature versions of Charlie and Vaggie:

Rosie is the Ruler of Cannibal Town, one of the nicest place in Hell. She is good-natured, but respected by her people. Moreover, she runs an Emporium, where she helps her clients with their personal problems. This is pretty much what Charlie would like to do with the Hazbin Hotel. Rosie is also a singer and is inspired by Dolly, from the musical "Hello, Dolly!"

Carmilla is Hell's top weapon dealer, so she specializes in war and is herself an exceptional fighter. However, she is not ruthless and mostly fights to protect her loved ones. She is the kind of person a more balanced and self-assured Vaggie might become. Carmilla is also designed as a ballerina and her two daughters are called after protagonists of famous ballets.

Why do Charlie and Vaggie's adult selves have a singing and dancing motif? That's because Charlie and Vaggie are respectively a singer and a dancer.

Charlie is a singer:

Charlie: My name is Charlie, I like to sing! And when we get to know each other it's the greatest thing!

She always conveys her feelings through songs, like her many attempts to pitch her hotel (to the Sinners, to Adam, to the Cannibals). What is more:

Charlie: But Lilith thrived, empowering demonkind with her voice and songs.

Charlie wants to become like Lilith and to empower people with her voice. Her objective is to grow into an inspiring leader, who changes minds and touches hearts with words.

Vaggie is a dancer:

The problem is that she has yet to realize it. Vaggie struggles with self-expression, which is why she has very few songs in the first season. That said, she shows her devotion through actions, like her determination to fight for Charlie. What she needs to learn is a new fighting style rooted in love. That is dancing, a way to express one-self through the body. This is made clear by the two cut episodes Challenge Day and The Baphomet Ball:

This cut plotline had Vaggie fight proto-Carmilla and lose. Charlie would later cheer her up by inviting her to a Ball. There proto-Carmilla would be impressed by Vaggie's dancing skills. The basic idea is obvious. Vaggie is a fighter, who must evolve into a dancer.

So, once again Chaggie is complementary:

Charlie is linked to singing, words and "soul", as she herself is the Heart of the Hazbin Hotel.

Vaggie is linked to dancing, actions and "body", as she herself is the Arm of the Hazbin Hotel.

As a result, they are given opposite missions to save the hotel:

Charlie must convince the Cannibals to join her army (singing). She must find people, who will help them fight.

Vaggie must discover from Carmilla how to fight the exorcists. This means both learning her fighting style (dancing) and obtaining the angelic weapons.

And yet, to succeed in their respective areas of expertise both Charlie and Vaggie must step into the other's shoes.

Charlie learns to better understand Vaggie and by doing so she realizes the importance of actions:

Rosie: If there's anything I've learned, it's that words are cheap, but actions, they speak the truth. So, what have her actions said? Charlie: That she believes in me, and what we're doing.

Not only that, but she is forced to take a look inside and starts unpacking some of her negative emotions:

Charlie: My girlfriend is an Exorcist angel, and she never told me Rosie: Oh, shit! Quite a secret. How does that make you feel? Charlie: Just, angry, because we share everything, because she always supported me, and my ideas, and-and- and now, I don't know whether or not that was just more of the lies! Oh no that's a horrible thing to think! Do i think that?! Yes! N-no. Kinda?

As a result, she comes up with a song that combines her natural showmanship and charisma with a new resolution to act:

Charlie: For the first time in my life I might have to be ready for this Ready to be the one who's leading from the front Gotta come into my own Gotta come into my throne Gotta take charge and defend my only home And although I kinda feel unsteady Now I need to be ready for this

Charlie steps into the role of leader and is ready to take action:

All: For the first time in our lives We know that we are ready for this Rosie: We'll show Heaven a fight they won't forget! All: It's time to take a stand Charlie: It is time to lend a hand! (Cannibals: Huzzah!) Against the angels and their deadly threat! All: We cannot take it anymore The time has come to go to war Prepare to fight, we're ready for… THIS!

Vaggie inspires the residents of the Hotel to stay and convinces Carmilla to help. By doing so, she shows how much she has grown thanks to her time with Charlie:

Vaggie: What's important now is that we're going to have a fight on our hands. Look, this hotel is about to become the most dangerous place in hell, and we….I, can't guarantee your safety anymore. I still believe in Charlie's dream. I know this place can work. But none of you signed up for this. I'm gonna go learn how we can fight back, and when I come home….Well I'll understand if none of you are here.

Moreover, she learns to fight in a new way intertwined with music (Charlie's passion and world):

This fighting style is focused on defense and survival, rather than attack and killing:

Carmilla: Angels attack quickly, viciously, and without mercy. You'll need to defend better than that.

Carmilla: Well, look at that. You might just survive this.

It is based on love:

Carmilla: I see you're driven by your detestation Your every step is stoked with animus You need a different type of motivation Or there's no way that you can handle this I know you're thirstin' for vengeance, Vaggie You're out for blood But you'll only stand a chance if you're out for love

By the end, Charlie and Vaggie meet each other in front of the Hazbin Hotel. Charlie leads the people (soul) and Vaggie has the weapons (body). They have also grown enough to better understand each other. Charlie empathizes with Vaggie and forgives her lie. Vaggie realizes how much Charlie cares for her and is ready to value herself more:

At the same time, Charlie faces some of her repressed "aggressivity" and makes an important step as Princess of Hell:

Rosie and Alastor: She's bound to pass the test as Princess of Hell Like her Daddy, she is madly power-fell!

Vaggie instead learns some "self-love" and makes progress into becoming a true angel:

Carmilla: You're gonna fight without gloves And when that push comes to shove Yeah, you just might rise above Long as you're out for love

These changes are fully embraced and tested in the final battle.

FINALE: DEVIL AND ANGEL

The fight against the Exorcists is where Charlie and Vaggie's integration is on full display, starting with their designs:

Charlie wears a mini-dress with a heart decoration and wields a shield.

Vaggie fully covers her body with an androgynous and practical attire. She fights with her signature spear.

The usually masculine looking Charlie appears feminine. The usually feminine appearing Vaggie looks masculine. Their outfits also fit their respective fighting styles. Charlie is defensive, whereas Vaggie is aggressive. Wait... isn't something wrong? Shouldn't Charlie grow more aggressive and Vaggie more defensive? Yes and this is precisely what happens as the battle progresses...

Charlie is overwhelmed by her anger and grief over Sir Pentious's death and unlocks her full demonic form. She goes from defense (shield) to offense (pitchfork) and injures Adam. Finally, she transforms her arm into a claw and stops the First Man in his tracks.

Vaggie is attacked by Lute, loses her spear and is forced on the defensive. She protects herself from Lute's relentless assault until she reveals her angelic wings and traps her opponent. Eventually, she has pity of Lute and lets her live.

Charlie's climatic moment is a show of strength, whereas Vaggie's is a show of mercy.

In other words:

Charlie appears more feminine, but acts more masculine

Vaggie appears more masculine, but acts more feminine

In comparison to their usual dynamic, Chaggie go through a complete inversion. This development is conveyed also by a small detail: their hair. Charlie lets hers loose, while Vaggie ties hers.

Charlie's hair usually covers her horns and is tied because she represses her demonic side. The moment she gives in to her inner demon, the horns come out and the hair gets loose, just like her feelings are untamed.

Vaggie: I'm not used to fighting with long hair.

Vaggie's hair is an attempt to hide her past and vulnerability. She has it grow after her abandonement to mask her scars (her eye and missing wings). In the finale, she ties it to fight freely. In this way, her brand new angelic wings can come out in all their beauty.

So, Charlie embraces her demon side, while Vaggie has her inner angel emerge. The twist is that Charlie the demon teaches Vaggie how to be a proper angel. Vaggie the angel instead shows Charlie that there is value in demonic traits. They integrate with each other to become the best versions of themselves. This shows also before and after the fight.

In the Finale, Charlie expresses all her self-loathing:

Charlie: He did it for us, the ultimate sacrifice He gave me his trust, and look how we paid the price This bloodshed could have been avoided If I convinced Heaven to work together I took a hotel and I destroyed it I know I could have done better Better, instead of letting you down

Thanks to this, her loved ones come to her side and support her. What is more, she starts to back up her words with actions:

Katie Killjoy: Charlie Morningstar managed to fend off the angelic attack with more than just nice words.

In More Than Anything Reprise, Vaggie conveys her love to Charlie through words and is there for her in a moment of self-doubt and weakness:

Vaggie: You've already done so much So many lives you've changed So many souls you've touched And in the end, if it's only me you've saved

She shows her sweetness and sensitivity.

By the end of season 1, Chaggie are together and stronger than ever. They have made the first steps into integration and tapped into their respective potentials. Both as individuals and as saviors of the universe.

THE MYTH OF EDEN

Charlie: Drawn in by Lilith's fierce independence, Lucifer found her, and the two rebellious dreamers fell deeply in love.

The series starts with a retelling of the myth of Eden, which is set-up as the heart of the series:

Plot-wise all the characters are living with its consequences

Theme-wise it shows the birth of love between the first man and the first woman...

The twist is that the first couple isn't Adam and Eve, but Lucifer and Lilith:

Who are foils to Charlie and Vaggie:

Both couples have a demon and an angel, who fall in love against the odds.

Both Charlie and Vaggie foil Lucifer in different ways. Like her father, Charlie is a wide-eyed idealist, who doesn't fit in her kingdom and wants to change it. Like the devil, Vaggie is a fallen angel, who is let down by heaven and finds love in hell.

Both Charlie and Vaggie are set-up to foil Lilith. Charlie is a demon full of love, who wants to empower others with her voice. Just like her mom. Vaggie is an angel hidden in hell, who keeps secrets out of a misplaced wish to protect others. Lilith is a demon hidden in heaven... wanna bet that she is keeping secrets from her husband and daughter to protect them?

Why is there such a juxtaposition between the two couples? Two reasons:

Charlie is gonna deal with her complicated feelings for her parents through Vaggie. Her partner is gonna challenge her to grow into her own person (microchosm).

Lucifer and Lilith unwillingly broke the world, but Charlie and Vaggie are gonna fix it (macrochosm)

This is why the two couples are immediately juxtaposed:

After Charlie ends her retelling of The Story of Hell, Vaggie arrives to check on her.

Lucifer and Lilith destroyed the status quo:

Charlie: But this gift came with a curse. And with this single act of disobedience, evil finally found its way to Earth. With it, a new realm of darkness and sin. And the order Heaven worked to maintain was shattered.

Charlie and Vaggie will bring a new and better one:

Charlie: We'll make a difference, wait and see Charlie and Vaggie: We're gonna do this, you and me

#hazbin hotel #chaggie #charlie morningstar #vaggie hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel meta #my meta

[ach-sss-no]

someone asked why i loudly asserted that the stewing rabbits bit of lotr is the opposite book vs. movie and i think it is time to move off of the giant reblog chain i'm making

The Premise: Sam, Frodo and Gollum are all doing the opposite of what they are doing in the book in some fashion or another

(first off: in the movie they abandon the stew and don't eat it. the book takes a lot longer with all of this, and they do in fact eat the stew, and I definitely understand the movie couldn't be as expansive with the pacing but it's just. funny to me. they don't eat the stew vs. they do eat the stew, there's your first opposite)

now. THE SCENE: Of Herbs and Stewed Rabbit

(Small disclaimer/disclosure: I referenced the script instead of a movie clip for this, so there may be some nuance missed in visuals or whatever but I don't think it would be enough of a difference to matter and hopefully you will soon see why not)

Frodo

Starting with him because this is simplest.

In the movie, Frodo is just sitting there minding his own business when Gollum dumps dead rabbits in his lap. (Then he doesn't interact with the ensuing conversation at all)

In the book he's asleep when Gollum brings the rabbits and does not participate in the scene. Okay, so he's awake vs. asleep. Easy.

(Also, book Frodo didn't witness the conflict between the other two characters and had no opportunity to intervene, which creates an interesting 'what could have been', but I am digressing. We are only 10% of the way in. buckle up)

Sam

In the movie, Sam is passive and reacting. Gollum dumps dead rabbits in Mr. Frodo's lap oh no what do I guess we'll cook them

In the book, Sam is active and orchestrating events.

Sam decides of his own accord that he wants to address their dwindling supplies:

Sam had been giving earnest thought to food as they marched. Now that the despair of the impassable Gate was behind him, he did not feel so inclined as his master to take no thought for their livelihood beyond the end of their errand; [in case you forgot. Earlier on Sam was like 'we won't have enough food for the way back' and frodo essentially responds with 'the way back. oh you sweet summer child'] and anyway it seemed wiser to him to save the waybread of the Elves for worse times ahead.

Note: This is all very good reasoning by Mr. Samwise and an excellent example of why he's so necessary to the quest! Yes, staying alive is step one.

But Where to get food? In both movie and book Sam is taking advantage of his resources (dead rabbits acquired via gollum), but in the book he's way more proactive about it:

An idea struck him and he turned to Gollum. Gollum had just begun to sneak off on his own, and he was crawling away on all fours through the fern. 'Hi! Gollum!' said Sam. 'Where are you going? Hunting? Well see here, old noser, you don't like our food, and I'd not be sorry for a change myself. Your new motto's always ready to help. Could you find anything fit for a hungry hobbit? ' 'Yes, perhaps, yes,' said Gollum. 'Sméagol always helps, if they asks-- if they asks nicely.' 'Right!' said Sam. 'I does ask. And if that isn't nice enough, I begs.'

In this point in the book Sam has now:

Decided of his own accord that he has a problem and that he wants to actively solve it

Arrived at a solution to the problem without any outside help or suggestions

Commanded Gollum to go hunt

In the point in the movie Sam has done:

Nothing

I'm not exaggerating. In the movie the scene hasn't started yet.

In both book and movie, rabbits are acquired a little while later. In the book this is a nonevent because Sam requested and expected rabbits. In the movie, the rabbits unexpectedly appear, and Gollum says they are for the hobbits to eat (Sam doesn't even come up with the idea to eat them on his own!)

They are young. They are tender. They are nice. Yes they are! Eat them! Eat them! [He bites and tears into the raw meat.]

GOLLUM SHOWED HIM HOW TO EAT THEM LIKE A MOTHER CAT.

Anyway, in the movie, we just cut to Sam stewing the rabbits after that.

But in the book, Sam isn't done arranging things:

He thought for a bit, while he took out his knife, cleaned and whetted it, and began to dress the rabbits. He was not going to leave Frodo alone asleep even for a few minutes. 'Now, Gollum,' he said, 'I've another job for you. Go and fill these pans with water, and bring 'em back! '

'Sméagol will fetch water, yes,' said Gollum. 'But what does the hobbit want all that water for? He has drunk, he has washed.' 'Never you mind,' said Sam. `If you can't guess, you'll soon find out. And the sooner you fetch the water, the sooner you'll learn. Don't you damage one of my pans, or I'll carve you into mincemeat.'

So now Sam has:

Decided of his own accord that he has a problem and that he wants to actively solve it

Arrived at a solution to the problem without any outside help or suggestions

Commanded Gollum to go hunt

Lovingly watched Frodo sleep

Collected rabbits after they were provided and begun skinning them

Assigned Gollum to fill his cook-pans

Gollum leaves to do this new errand and Sam starts building a cook fire.

He was just stooping over his fire, shielding it and building it up with heavier wood, when Gollum returned, carrying the pans carefully and grumbling to himself. He set the pans down, and then suddenly saw what Sam was doing. He gave a thin hissing shriek, and seemed to be both frightened and angry. 'Ach! Sss -- no!' he cried. 'No! Silly hobbits, foolish, yes foolish! They mustn't do it!' 'Mustn't do what?' asked Sam in surprise. 'Not make the nassty red tongues,' hissed Gollum. `Fire, fire! It's dangerous, yes it is. It burns, it kills. And it will bring enemies, yes it will.'

Sam has just been given a completely sane and rational reason why a fire is a bad idea (they are in a dangerous area and can't risk attention!) (as well as a reason that is less pertinent- it looks like Gollum is afraid of fire, and he may have sensible reasons to be afraid of fire because it is dangerous, but this is not Sam's problem)

Sam addresses the 'it will bring enemies' thing

'I don't think so,' said Sam. `Don't see why it should, if you don't put wet stuff on it and make a smother. But if it does, it does. I'm going to risk it, anyhow. I'm going to stew these coneys.'

And Sam is like, nah.

Now Gollum gets upset that he's 'ruining good meat' by cooking it

Now Sam de-escalates

Now, now! ' said Sam. 'Each to his own fashion. Our bread chokes you, and raw coney chokes me. If you give me a coney, the coney's mine, see, to cook, if I have a mind. And I have. You needn't watch me. Go and catch another and eat it as you fancy -- somewhere private and out o' my sight. Then you won't see the fire, and I shan't see you, and we'll both be the happier. [He still managed to slip in a 'get out of my sight'] I'll see the fire don't smoke, if that's any comfort to you.'

In the movie he just insults the quality of the meat:

SAM What's to ruin? There's hardly any meat on 'em.

...which I suppose is fair in this alternate universe where the rabbits were just dumped in his lap, unwanted.

Then in the movie they skip to the taters conversation, but in the book, there's more!

Back to the book:

Gollum withdrew grumbling, and crawled into the fern. Sam busied himself with his pans. 'What a hobbit needs with coney,' he said to himself, 'is some herbs and roots, especially taters -- not to mention bread. Herbs we can manage, seemingly.' 'Gollum!' he called softly. 'Third time pays for all. I want some herbs.'

Gollum says no.

'Sméagol'll get into real true hot water, when this water boils, if he don't do as he's asked,' growled Sam. 'Sam'll put his head in it, yes precious. And I'd make him look for turnips and carrots, and taters too, if it was the time o' the year. I'll bet there's all sorts of good things running wild in this country. I'd give a lot for half a dozen taters.'

Now Gollum asks what taters are, gets a cryptic answer, and is offered a kind of food he has just expressed he does not want (cooked food) and again ordered to fetch herbs. Gollum declines.

'You couldn't say no to that.' 'Yes, yes we could. Spoiling nice fish, scorching it. Give me fish now, and keep nassty chips!' 'Oh you're hopeless,' said Sam. 'Go to sleep!'

The movie finally has some of the same words in almost the same place:

SAM PO-TAY-TOES! Boil 'em. Mash 'em. Stick 'em in a stew. Lovely big golden chips with a nice piece of fried fish…. SM�AGOL [i'm not fixing it blah] [Sticks out his tongue in disgust] Pbbbttt!! [so now he's just devolved into making fart noises] SAM Even you couldn't say no to that. [He takes a sip of the stew] SM�AGOL Oh yes we could! Spoil nice fish... [scrambles up close to Sam] Give it to usss rrraw... and wrrriggling! [That line is not in the book. every time i see it quoted i age a year] [Makes sickeningly happy face.] You keep nasty chips. [Hops away] SAM You're hopeless.

The scene here ends in the movie.

In the movie, Sam has:

Watched rabbits be thrown at Frodo

Started cooking them after being all but commanded to eat them

Had some banter with Gollum

Left the scene without eating his stew

Sam is a passive character who is not orchestrating events, but rather reacting to them. A character being passive is not in and of itself a bad thing. I am only pointing it out because it is different from the book and a big change to this specific character (wanted to mention that because some people really don't like passive characters in general, I think they have a place. Frodo is rather passive in this scene but he obviously has a purpose.)

...In the book, Sam stews the rabbits for an hour and then eats the stew with Frodo

Frodo yawned and stretched. 'You should have been resting Sam,' he said. 'And lighting a fire was dangerous in these parts.

Wow! Was it? I feel like someone mentioned that earlier.

'Gollum! ' Sam called and whistled softly. 'Come on! Still time to change your mind. There's some left, if you want to try stewed coney.' There was no answer. 'Oh well, I suppose he's gone off to find something for himself. We'll finish it,' said Sam. [...] We don't see eye to eye, and he's not pleased with Sam, O no precious, not pleased at all.'

Whyever not?

To sum, book!Sam has:

Decided of his own accord that he has a problem and that he wants to actively solve it

Decided he's going to assign Gollum to the problem (This also demonstrates Sam's interpersonal intelligence. He notices what Gollum's capable of and understands intuitively how it can be turned to something industrious and useful) (Sam has made some missteps in other areas which are in the next section)

Commanded Gollum to go hunt

Collected rabbits after they were provided (according to his request), and began skinning them

Watched Frodo sleep

Assigned Gollum to fill his cook-pans, specifically because he does not want to leave Gollum and Frodo alone together, which is sensible

Threatened to carve Gollum into mincemeat, while holding a knife

Watched Frodo sleep and reflected on his poor health

Skinned the rabbits and put them in stew

Been told a cook fire is a bad idea and declined to stop what he's doing. A character being told to stop doing something & continuing with it anyway is another way for that character to show agency.

Asked Gollum to fetch herbs and potatoes (was refused)

Foraged a few herbs himself

Eaten lovely stew (while lamenting that there are no onions in it, and no bowls to put it in ;_;)

Offered Gollum stew long after (hours after) Gollum got angry and left

...all because Sam initially decided he wanted to acquire and cook food, and then took every necessary step to make that happen of his own accord.

Sam is an active character with high agency.

He is also showing more care for Frodo here (watching him while asleep and fretting over his health, lamenting that he somehow made rabbit stew from nothing by using his resources (which do here include another character- people are also resources!) but he can't put it in a nice bowl for mr. frodo- there's just a lot more here, which is natural because prose is a more detail-rich medium. Not all of this would have fit in the movie and I'm not saying it should have.

Even allowing for time, however, I do think there would have been a way to collapse this scene to the needed time requirement and still have Sam in charge of it instead of Gollum.

The scene finally ends on:

Then he noticed a thin spiral of blue-grey, smoke, plain to see as it caught the sunlight, rising from a thicket above him. With a shock he realized that this was the smoke from his little cooking-fire, which he had neglected to put out.

Did anyone foresee this?

Gollum

In the movie, Gollum is foisting a gift on Frodo and forcing social interaction that he doesn't want.

In the book, Gollum wants to go away somewhere so he can eat and is pressed into reluctant manual labor instead

Gollum is a little different from the other two characters in that his personality and motivations are also completely different here. (Where as Sam at least still has the same goals of looking after Frodo and making food.)

The scene is in Sam's POV so what Gollum is thinking and feeling has to be inferred from his actions/words/tone, but he's not exactly subtle.

The movie scene starts off with Gollum turning up with rabbits. He dumps them in Frodo's lap. He makes a spectacle of himself. He starts mauling the corpses.

The book scene starts off with Gollum trying to slip away somewhere to eat in private.

That's another thing. Gollum doesn't demonstratively bite into things Gollum always slips away somewhere to eat in private. Earlier:

It was actually not long before Gollum returned; but he came so quietly that they did not hear him till he stood before them. His fingers and face were soiled with black mud. He was still chewing and slavering. [He didn't bring food back on purpose. He's still chewing because he only has six teeth.] What he was chewing, they did not ask or like to think. 'Worms or beetles or something slimy out of holes,' thought Sam. 'Brr! The nasty creature; the poor wretch! ' Gollum said nothing to them, until he had drunk deeply and washed himself in the stream. Then he came up to them, licking his lips. 'Better now,' he said.

(Emphasis added.. Imagine you just recruited a serial killer to your D&D-party-in-real-life and he silently turns up covered in mud and won't talk to you. It looks like he's been eating bugs. He won't speak. he won't tell you what he's eating.)

Back to the scene in question: Gollum's leaving. Sam flags him down and asks him to hunt.

'Hi! Gollum!' said Sam. 'Where are you going? Hunting? Well see here, old noser, you don't like our food, and I'd not be sorry for a change myself. Your new motto's always ready to help. Could you find anything fit for a hungry hobbit? '

He asks in an insulting and confrontational way. ('old noser' + 'Your new motto's always ready to help' reeking of suspicion)

To be clear, I'm not criticizing Sam whatsoever for disliking and being suspicious of the known murderer he's traveling with against his will. but the way he talks to Gollum does have consequences.

'Yes, perhaps, yes,' said Gollum. 'Sméagol always helps, if they asks -- if they asks nicely.'

Gollum is reluctant and asks to be treated politely. I don't find this response disproportionate or unreasonable. Consider what would happen if anyone talked to LOTR-era Bilbo Baggins the way Sam just talked to Gollum. The ash would still be falling from the sky.

Anyway Sam's response is to mimic the way he talks.

'Right!' said Sam. 'I does ask. And if that isn't nice enough, I begs.'

Gollum leaves, and is gone a long time. While he's gone, Sam gazes lovingly at Frodo, and - this is not directly relevant but I wanted to note it:

Gollum returned quietly and peered over Sam's shoulder. Looking at Frodo, he shut his eyes and crawled away without a sound. [Seeing that Sam and Frodo are occupied, Gollum slips away without interrupting, which is also a different vibe from 'assaulting Frodo with rabbits while he's just sitting there.'] Sam came to him a moment later and found him chewing something and muttering to himself

Look! There's a character arc happening in the background [but not in the movies] It will reach fruition at Cirith Ungol [in the books]

Anyway, Gollum is chewing on something so he's clearly taken time out to hunt for himself as well (note for context: He's disastrously underweight and has been complaining of hunger).

On the ground beside him lay two small rabbits, which he was beginning to eye greedily. 'Sméagol always helps,' he said. `He has brought rabbits, nice rabbits. But master has gone to sleep, and perhaps Sam wants to sleep. Doesn't want rabbits now? Sméagol tries to help, but he can't catch things all in a minute.'

Gollum has brought rabbits on command, and he's reluctant to hand them over. This is the direct opposite of bringing rabbits of his own accord out of nowhere and forcing them onto somebody.

'Now, Gollum,' he said, 'I've another job for you. Go and fill these pans with water, and bring 'em back! ' 'Sméagol will fetch water, yes,' said Gollum. 'But what does the hobbit want all that water for? He has drunk, he has washed.' 'Never you mind,' said Sam.

That was a reasonable question, asked politely and prefaced by 'yes I'll do it'. There's no call for a 'never you mind' and there's certainly no call for this:

`If you can't guess, you'll soon find out. And the sooner you fetch the water, the sooner you'll learn. Don't you damage one of my pans, or I'll carve you into mincemeat.'

Gollum does the work and is careful with the pans as requested.

He was just stooping over his fire, shielding it and building it up with heavier wood, when Gollum returned, carrying the pans carefully and grumbling to himself.

He set the pans down, and then suddenly saw what Sam was doing.

Gollum discovers that 'Never you mind' meant 'I am going to do something you find dangerous and terrifying' i'm pretty sure this is what he's seeing in his POV

He gave a thin hissing shriek, and seemed to be both frightened and angry. `Ach! Sss -- no!' he cried.

Gollum gets angry.

At this point in the movie, Gollum has:

Dumped rabbits in Frodo's lap

Told him to eat them

Played with the dead animals in front of Frodo

there's a cut to Sam cooking the rabbits- Gollum makes no comment at all on the safety or feasibility of a fire, but gets right up close to it to peer into the cookpot, so he must not be too scared of it.

In the book, Gollum has:

Tried to slip away, presumably to eat, because he's hungry. Or maybe he just wants alone time! Shelob is not in visiting range. He's not being dastardly. Leave him alone

He's been flagged down to do additional work, and interrupted from whatever he wanted to do

Went off somewhere. Caught two rabbits (with his bare hands, I assume??) Also caught at least one other thing, because he's chewing something when he comes back

Came back with rabbits

Left Sam to his tender moment with Frodo and went off for more alone time

Gently floated the idea that perhaps Sam doesn't want these rabbits anymore, surrendered the rabbits when asked

Agreed to another errand that is probably difficult for him to do, after hunting down at least two rabbits Up to this point Gollum has been called 'old noser', had his speech patterns parroted at him in a mocking way, had a polite question refused, and been told he will be 'carved into mincemeat' if he damages the cooking pans (does Gollum even know what a cooking pan is? When was the last time he's seen one? Was he just handed some foreign object and told 'put water in it and don't break it' 'of course! why?' 'stfu') Gollum has a whole long complicated history that would reasonably make him very prone to difficulties with emotional regulation. Severe trauma and centuries of social isolation are involved.

He only just now gets angry, now that he thinks Sam is going to start a forest fire and summon orcs and the first word out of his mouth is a relatively restrained 'Ach!' a word that doesn't even start with an F!

Gollum says fire is harmful and will draw enemy attention. Sam says essentially 'probably not but if it does that's too bad'.

Another bit of context is that Gollum has been presenting himself as the 'wilderness survival guy' and has obvious pride when he's talking about finding his way through the marsh. Sam isn't just being dismissive of Gollum, he's particularly dismissing something Gollum has real knowledge of and takes pride in that has nothing to do with being a corrupted evildoer.

Then Sam says he's going to cook the food.

'Stew the rabbits!' squealed Gollum in dismay. `Spoil beautiful meat Sméagol saved for you, poor hungry Sméagol! What for? What for, silly hobbit? They are young, they are tender, they are nice. Eat them, eat them!' He clawed at the nearest rabbit, already skinned and lying by the fire.

After all of that, we are at 'They are young, they are tender, they are nice. Eat them, eat them!' In the movie, the scene started with this line, apropros of nothing, and it's just. Yelled at Frodo. It's an invitation.

In the book: The same line is a cry of frustration. This isn't a non sequitur, this is a last straw! Gollum is hungry. He's been chronically hungry for a long time. The rabbits are exactly the kind of thing he likes to eat. They must smell amazing to him because now they're skinned. He had to turn them over to Sam after going to the work of hunting them (he didn't have to do this, he could have just not come back, or pretended he didn't find anything- whether or not his motives are pure, and they probably aren't, he's doing what he promised).

In return: Sam told him to do more work, and then started a fire- which Gollum seems to genuinely think is idiotic and puts his own safety at risk because he's stuck with these hobbits for the time being- Sam won't listen to reason and put it out, and to add insult to injury, that meat he insisted on?

HE'S JUST GOING TO RUIN IT

Imagine you were hungry and you brought someone an oreo (also you had to wander around in the woods and find the oreo and then surprise it from behind and break its neck), and that person just! scraped off the cream filling and replaced it with spray cheese! after that person called you a jerk and set a fire in a trash can! Maybe that person loves spray-cheese oreos! Maybe everyone but you loves them! I think you'd still be frustrated! (If you're the person who loves spray cheese oreos, pretend it's something else.)

On my first reading of the book this is where I got that sinking 'I am feeling a mite sympathetic to the horrible murderer that I know is just going to stay evil and die in the end' feeling. Gollum is being dreadfully annoying, but he's been pushed past his ability to self-regulate. It feels like the dynamic of antagonizing someone until they melt down and then criticizing them for melting down (Sam is not intending to do this, and doesn't even seem to notice that's what's happened, but the result is the same.)

Sam smooths things over and lets Gollum leave! until

Until

'Gollum!' he called softly. 'Third time pays for all. I want some herbs.' Gollum's head peeped out of the fern, but his looks were neither helpful nor friendly.

WHYEVER NOT?

'A few bay-leaves, some thyme and sage, will do -- before the water boils,' said Sam. 'No! ' said Gollum. `Sméagol is not pleased. And Sméagol doesn't like smelly leaves. He doesn't eat grasses or roots, no precious, not till he's starving or very sick, poor Sméagol.'

(Gollum was retching at the scent of flowers earlier. He may be annoyingly dramatic but I have no cause to doubt that they really did make him feel ill)

(also, I'm out in the weeds speculating now, but I just noticed Gollum is starting to spout off talking about himself and how he feels after Sam pooh-poohed his fretting about the fire, and it feels like a bid for recognition, did you notice Sam has not been calling him Sméagol? Sam isn't using his real name.)

The response:

'Sméagol'll get into real true hot water, when this water boils, if he don't do as he's asked,' growled Sam.

Gollum is here under duress and is cooperating with a quest that is in every way opposed to his personal interests and survival.

'Sméagol won't go, O no precious, not this time,' hissed Gollum. 'He's frightened, and he's very tired, and this hobbit's not nice, not nice at all. Sméagol won't grub for roots and carrotses and -- taters. What's taters, precious, eh, what's taters?

He hasn't had any rest because he was immediately sent off to hunt. I'll bet he is tired

Gollum is still willing to stop being angry because he saw a shiny new word, let's see how this goes

`Po-ta-toes,' said Sam. 'The Gaffer's delight, and rare good ballast for an empty belly. But you won't find any, so you needn't look. But be good Sméagol and fetch me the herbs, and I'll think better of you

Sam gives a cryptic answer and demands more work. 'I'll think better of you?' Lies! Gollum just did two errands and received nothing but more verbal abuse. Sam did not even thank him. This was where on my first reading I was saying to myself 'oh no Sam is mishandling this really badly and doesn't even notice'

I'll cook you some taters one of these days. I will: fried fish and chips served by S. Gamgee. You couldn't say no to that.' 'Yes, yes we could. Spoiling nice fish, scorching it. Give me fish now, and keep nassty chips! ' 'Oh you're hopeless,' said Sam. 'Go to sleep!'

Gollum doesn't understand what chips are. He just said he doesn't like plants or cooked food. He's tired and hungry and has been ordered around all day. He did everything asked up to now and in return he gets called hopeless.

Sméagol willingly, nonconfrontationally, successfully did two out of the three tasks, and when he refuses a third task after being demeaned and dismissed, he's called hopeless.

So Gollum leaves. That's the end of his involvement in this scene. he didn't hit anyone, bite anyone, or call Sam anything worse than 'not nice', 'silly' and 'foolish' (He does not call Sam a 'stupid fat hobbit', that appears to be a movie invention as well)

In the movies, he threw dead animals at frodo and some of this dialog was said without any of the context. haha funni.

The takeaways from the book version are that Gollum can understand and follow verbal commands and do errands (this is important because Gollum needs to be somewhat sane and lucid in order to satisfyingly be held accountable for his crimes), will cooperate when asked, communicates poorly, has trouble controlling his temper, and may at any time be in physical distress and not show it. (He doesn't give outward signs of fatigue.)

The takeaways from the movie version seem to be that Gollum is hyperactive, doesn't understand facial expressions, and finds cooking to be an alien custom. No one tried to ask him to do anything, so I have no idea whether he can understand requests and do tasks or not. May or may not be lucid.

Can we at least agree that Sam saying 'You're hopeless' after this:

Give it to usss rrraw… and wrrriggling! [Makes sickeningly happy face.]

is a different vibe from Sam saying 'You're hopeless' after hearing this?

'[Sméagol]'s frightened, and he's very tired, and this hobbit's not nice, not nice at all.'

Summary

Why is this scene the opposite?

Frodo has gone from being asleep but serving as an emotional anchor (both Sam and Gollum look at him and have some kind of emotional revelation, although the latter has his in private and we don't ever know what it is, the cad) to being awake but doing nothing and leaving. (He does go and find Faramir when the scene ends, but at that point, we are moving on to the next scene. so I don't count it.) Frodo has gone from affecting events while asleep to having no effect while awake

Sam has gone from being in charge of what's happening to passively reacting to a chaos gremlin

Gollum has gone from following orders until he can't take it anymore and suffering to being a chaos gremlin who does whatever he wants and seemingly having a good time? he's dancing around

The stew goes from eaten to uneaten

The overall purpose of the original scene appears to have been mainly to establish character and relationship dynamics. The movie scene... is doing the same, I suppose, but it's so brief and stripped of context that it almost feels like an homage more than a real scene, like it's there because they couldn't get away with entirely cutting it. And as every character is behaving contrary to what they used to in one form or another, the overall effect is:

Thank you for coming to my TED talk. Ask me about the waterfall scene next

#long post #never ask me about the waterfall scene

[lurkingshan]

Tender Light Eps 1-4

Shoutout to @dangermousie for putting this show on my dash and pointing me to where I could find it, because this is extremely my shit. Zhang Xincheng’s presence alone was enough to peak my interest, but it's also a smarty paced mystery thriller with a noona romance and some truly gorgeous cinematography. I am already hooked.

There are a few things about this drama that stand out to me in particular:

The visual filmmaking is quite stylish and so many of the shots are absolutely beautiful

It has several mysteries stacked inside each other and a strong command of the details and carefully paced reveals for each

This story is dark and very interested in the corrosive power of mean-spirited gossip and the damage it can do in a community

The ML's attraction to the FL is raw and intense and explicitly sexual in a way I rarely see in cdrama, and I like both how much his natural interest and sympathy for her seems based in them both being town pariahs and how the gossip still warps the way he sees her despite the fact he of all people should know better than to believe what others say

The show is intentionally juxtaposing his sexual attraction with the physical and sexual violence the FL experiences in her marriage and the unwanted advances she receives from other men, in some ways he is no better than the rest

All of the characters are morally grey, there are no clear heroes or villains and it feels like everyone is both kind of right and kind of wrong about the things they believe of each other

It's also got a thread going about bias and abuse of power in policing and I am curious to see how far they take that

I'm finding this super compelling so far and the storytelling feels confident. I rarely watch cdramas live, but this one feels worth following along, sitting in each narrative beat, and having time to digest the reveals and the constant wtf reaction they inspire. This story feels like an onion with many layers to peel back and I want to get to the center.

#omg yall no one is giffing this beautiful show yet i’m suffering #tender light #cdrama #shan shouts into the void

[good-beans]

I know most of our focus goes (rightfully) to the trial songs, but I genuinely believe Baptism of Fire is equally a masterpiece of meaningful writing and intense vocal acting

Incoming tag rant because I need to yell about this, feel free to yell back

#milgram #fuuta kajiyama #like the other vds have good writing about the character and whatever social issue their crime focuses on #but this one is very pointedly about YOU #its about the audience. its about the milgram project. its about self reflection. its about self-appointed roles. its about you #even if you didnt vote t1 or anything the whole things is calling on you to reflect on your own judgements of others #how you treat people who come off rougher. how you treat people who have made a (bad but) common mistake. #do you also find entertainment in seeing people dragged down and suffering because it would 'serve them right?' #but es always remains in control of the situation. the drama doesnt end with 'and fuuta was right - you guys suck!' #its clarified that situations are different and have nuance. we are reminded to look at things with nuance. #then we are smoothly re-immersed in the story #and then!! the acting itself!!! #arthur lounsbery put his whole fussy into that performance (<- fuuta pussy) and i am in his debt every day for it #in both his vds hes just super expressive and fun to listen to #i dont understand japanese but he packs so much interesting intonation and emotion into every word -- im obsessed listening to him #he nails all the subtle emotions fuuta has: the pouts and outrage as well as underlying fear grief insecurity and immaturity #and then baptism of fire hes just... Wailing #like mahiru has her innocent and pathetic cries of pain in her sweet voice that works for her character but fuutas pain feels much more raw #the way hes practically sobbing at the end -- his voice cracking and screeching throughout -- the whimper of pain #its so unbearably intense!! it hurts!! and its supposed to!! but hes just so raw with it #and dont even get me started on his pained hysteric laughter omg.... #its just. a masterpiece. #i always appreciate the vds but i dont think ive enjoyed/relistened to one as much as this one #okay WAIT im back to add one more thing because im obsessed with ths idea of intentions #specifically in milgram i think the intention behind the murders are very important to consider #so i love love love the huge focus on 'i didnt expect/mean for this to happen' #plus as a general theme in fiction i think its sooo juicy when good intentions get fucked up #so i loved the repetition of that #fuuta is such a special case because he genuinely had no desire or expectation for his victim to die #(maybe kazui too? but he doesn't say so in his vd like fuuta does)

[carefulfears]

thinking about "you have a life" / "i don't know what i have" + "what do you want, dana?" / "i want everything that i should want at this time of my life" + the perceived shame in scully's loss of normalcy... "unlike you, mulder, i would like to have a life" + "do you believe in the afterlife?" / "i'd settle for a life in this one" + "don't you ever want to just stop? get out of the damn car? settle down and live something approaching a normal life?"

her friend ellen saying, "well, first you have to get a life." tara, pregnant with their christmas gift, saying that life before one grew inside her was "somehow...less, just a prelude," while barren dana cries in the kitchen. "i know you and dad were...disappointed...that i chose the path that i'm on."

thinking about how mulder said, "this is a normal life," and how she smiled. (he doesn't know any different). how, in the end, he said, "hey, scully? i know it's not your normal life, but thanks for coming out there with me."

(christmas before quantico, "i guess i'm afraid of making a big mistake. dad thinks i am." and missy's response: "it's not his life, dana.")

her application to adopt emily was rejected: "you're a single woman who's never been married or had a long-term relationship. you're in a high stress, time intensive, and dangerous occupation."

bill's reaction: "sounds like something your partner would say. this isn't about any little girl, dana. this is about you. it's about some...void, some emptiness inside you that you're trying to fill."

and mulder to the judge: "the fact that she can adopt this child, her own flesh and blood, is something i don't feel i have the right to question, and i don't believe anyone has the right to stand in the way of."

(that last christmas with missy before everything: "there is no right or wrong. life is just a path...just don't mistake the path for what is really important in life. the people you're going to meet along the way. you don't know who you're going to meet when you join the FBI. you don't know how your life is going to change, or how you're going to change the life of others.")

and ultimately, it all leads to a leather couch. and after contemplating that sacrifice of normalcy, what she should want, the decisions she could have made, she says, "i once considered spending my whole life with this man...what i would have missed."

she could've been a doctor, like her father wanted. she could've settled down, married waterston, had a normal life, like her friends and brother wanted. but what would she have missed?

"what if there was only one choice and all the other ones were wrong?" / "and all the...choices would then lead to this very moment. one wrong turn, and...we wouldn't be sitting here together."

#i truly believe that what's made this show so lasting and rich to so many generations #is how completely in touch with raw human experience it always was. there was always this kind of bleak undertone of...this is how it is... #and very rarely was it ever overcome or accepted or boldly subverted. it just was. #the pressures and the grief and the traps of abuse and trauma and power structures. this is how it is. this is how it feels. #'people thought the storyline and characters for x-files made it a 'dark' show but i never saw it that way. #i always thought mulder and scully were the light in dark places.' #my favorite quote about the show and why i think it's so comforting. it's the harsh reality of the world #of which mulder and scully are not exempt #but it's also mulder and scully going wherever they are needed with their unending kindness and their perseverance and their passion #and they bring all of those things to each other too. that's why she chose THIS life. despite it NOT being normal. #despite it NOT being what her father wanted for her. despite it NOT being easy. she chooses it over and again #because he is bringing light to dark places and she wants to be where he is and she wants to be doing important work. she wants to be #'on the side of the victim' #and that's rarely supported by societal structures and it's hard. but like she says #what would she have missed?? #txf.txt #you people make me crazy when you dismiss her decisions and act like she Ruined Her Life or mulder Ruined Her Life #congratulations! you've missed the point! #all things #emily #dreamland

[arashi-no-saxlphone]

btw I can't fucking remember which bedman blog on here put in the tags of a post I commented on a while back that guilty gear is about relationships but if I ever track that post down and find you I'm gonna EXPLODE into your messages like "YOU FUCKING GENIUS" because I'm being so serious when I say that that single line has changed so much about how I look at character interactions. It opened new avenues. It has consistently and impactfully affected my ability to understand certain character motivations and how the wheel of fate and the narrative in guilty gear turns in the best possible way. Of course it was a bedman fan, like of COURSE the bedman fan taught the axl fan something important that he couldn't quite see before we are living out Xrd in real time with this shit god I love it on here.

#sairambles #guilty gear #literally cannot stop fucking thinking about it #I'm PRETTY sure it was a bedman blog #but I follow and have seen #many #LOL #such is the way - that character is VERY raw

[captainofthetidesbreath]

it's truly abysmal how shipping fandom has reduced the concept of compulsory heterosexuality / comphet (in all its complex, at times fraught, history as a political and theoretical concept) down to "a character I want to be in a femslash ship is not in a femslash ship"

the concept exists as a radical feminist, typically political lesbian and feminist separatist (more on that later), critique of real-world patriarchy and male power over women's sexuality, agency, creativity, freedom, and relationships in a way that prevents women from having fulfilling, enriching, and dynamic relationships with other women of all types for the purposes of isolating them and forcibly re-focusing their energy into controlling heterosexual relationships and reduces women solely to objects for male desire and power

compulsory heterosexuality also is actually not a fully accepted critique or lens, particularly in the way that it is applied and articulated within political theory, as it's been criticized for its generally rigid adherence to gender binary and conceptualization of strict gender roles and for its lack of intersection with individuals who function or identify outside of gender binary. it has also encountered criticism in how it articulates sexual orientation and politics through gender alone, and does not make a lot of room for other axes of sexual identity, politics, and other factors of identity.

it is also important to understand that the the concepts of "compulsory heterosexuality" and "heteronormativity" are actually somewhat different concepts discussing a similar area (different emphasis, different history, different political associations), and that the concept of compulsory heterosexuality is a core and critical tenet of the feminist separatist movement and political lesbianism, which urges that all women (even those who are not wlw) should and must choose to eschew all relationships with men in all contexts.

in that context, with the relationship of compulsory heterosexuality to feminist separatism and political lesbianism, it actually does worry me that many shipping fandoms who are fixated on this concept constantly say essentially "icb this woman is attracted to a man at all, it's comphet" bc there is a very real connection between this concept and the idea that all women should simply choose never to fuck men, that women have a political responsibility to excise men from all aspects of their lives, to view all men as their enemies, and that any woman with any relationship (of any type) with a man is complicit in her own oppression (which, I won't unpack here why this is horrific, bc this is too long as is and too concise articulation will be misconstrued, but it is Yikes, to put it lightly).

I do actually find it alarming how some shipping fandoms that constantly cry "comphet!" are consistently incredibly angry about the idea ANY woman will have a relationship with or be attracted to a man and believe that EVERY woman should choose to be a lesbian and eschew all relationships with men in the exact political pattern.

the concept of compulsory heterosexuality in queer and feminist spaces is actually very complex, and at times very fraught within the academic and political discourse, and it's actually really insane and in some measure alarming what shipping fandom is doing with it

#this is way longer than I wanted it to be but i found this in drafts #but anyway I do generally distrust any shipping subset that waves 'comphet!' around too much #and is obsessed with labeling every female character (including those shown to be attracted to men) as a lesbian #particularly those angry at the raw concept that women can be attracted to men (and claim she isn't REALLY) or erases her male friendships #because there is a......... sticky sticky sticky sticky history SPECIFICALLY with the relationship between comphet as a concept #and specific feminist political movements that are.... very much yikes

[hella1975]

hella do you think you could dumb bitchify aftg 🥺

(your making me want to get it but idk yet)

NO. GET HELP

#um. so basically i do not know how to even begin to explain aftg even if i am dumb bitchifying it. there's this guy #and he's on the run and he's on his own no family no friends but he's OBSESSED with a made up sport called exy #it's like a mental crutch for him it's the one thing he's really passionate about and he's willing to risk his brutal life #of survival and being on the run if it only means he can play. and this team of professional exy players called the foxes sign him on #and they're all messed up in some way bc the whole point of them is to be a refuge for societal rejects #we're talking drug addicts ex-juvie abuse victims etc etc the works and it's written in a VERY raw way #that often lends itself to making the characters feel very real but also does mishandle a lot of very sensitive topics as a result #and the series is basically about the found family of this team and them going from dysfunctional underdogs to national champions #except the fucking mafia is involved. and andrew minyard exists but i cant even speak of him tonight with the mood im in #i WILL shatter into a million pieces #ask #aftg

[daisyachain]

There are places where I think a sex scene can dramatically impact a story in a way that enriched the viewing experience and conveys important information. There are movies and/or tv shows in which this happens. I haven’t seen any of them. So much of the time it’s there to do exactly what it says on the tin. A woman and a man are banging. Sure. Fine. Happy for them. It’s just a literal scene used to pull a bit of a ‘well you didn’t think THEY would be involved’ plot twist or a ‘we’re so edgy’ signal. The only show so far that I’ve seen that uses sex scenes as an actual tool of storytelling is Black Sails, and the reason it works in Black Sails is that the sex is Bad. People are bored. People are distracted. The characters are so bound up with the plot that it’s physically prevented them from fucking like normal human beings. That works. The rest doesn’t

#kelsey rambles #don’t ask what prompted this post because it would lead to me being institutionalized #but I do think sex scenes have a lot of untapped potential for just. character information. that doesn’t get used #like the anne/jack scene. it communicates so well that the intimacy between these two comes from trust and not the other way around #anne isn’t attracted to jack as a person and jack is neither here nor there on anne as a romantic interest #he pursues her out of a sense of ‘well she’s a woman and that’s how this works’. she semi-sort-of-dates him because it’s all the same to her #she’s never wanted a guy so why wouldn’t she consider a platonic bond to be just the normal thing for screwing around #Jack isn’t paying attention to Anne because he’s thinking about money. #Anne is bickering with him like they’re a pair of muppet clowns #it’s so very awkward and unsexy. it’s not even charged enough to be embarrassing #they may as well be clipping each other’s toenails for all the raw desire there is(n’t) in the scene #and it works! these are two characters who have an intimacy so far from romantic that the writers describe it as twin-like #they misinterpret it as desire because they’re plank-thick pirates. it’s not toxic it’s just kind of square peg round hole #(hah hah). good scene. shows should try having good scenes more often

[ardentlytess]

god the fourth episode of bokura no micro na shuumatsu y’all

ritsu making himself the villain in masumi’s (& yuma’s) narrative just so that masumi didn’t have to make the choice himself to leave his mother to die

masumi admitting the fact that he was more upset about not being upset about his mother dying, about not wanting to save her, than the idea of her actual death

& ritsu letting him know that it was okay to feel that way. that it wasn’t his fault regardless. that he was blameless for what he was subjected to as a child & he was blameless now, & if masumi refused to believe that himself, then ritsu would bear the crown of thorns for him

he’d let himself become the villain all over again, just to spare masumi this pain

#bokura no micro na shuumatsu #the end of the world with you #i’m not going to deny that these characters are beyond fucked up #but also #as someone who grew up very similarly to masumi & has struggled w the same feelings my whole life #wow wow wow wow this ep hit hard #also literally just BIG props to this show for subverting the idea that abusive parents deserve your forgiveness no matter the circumstances #just because they’re your parents #i don’t think i’ve ever seen a show where they’ve tackled that idea in such a raw way #& obviously the conclusion this show takes is much darker than what most people will go through but #the same sentiment stands

[linddzz]

A sizable chunk of my friend circle are the sort of people who already had their grand poetry induced emotional moments in highschool and college so whenever I have a mild meltdown moment over my newfound appreciation for Oscar Wilde they just give me the most affectionate version of

#idk man i didnt have a comfortable relationship with the sort of raw emotional state required for appreciating poetry until i was over 30 #i remember i tried reading dorian gray in highschool and was mainly like #this is super duper gay but everyone talks about philosophy too much ugh #was a big ol fan of bronte tho because i was a little edgelord #anyway wilde having the balls to say aphrodite sits on the throne of god in late victorian england is aspirational #also i still dont agree with some of his philosophy of art and beauty but now its in a way where like #im not annoyed at all but am very upset i can't learn necromancy just so i can summon the ghost of wilde like #'hi no idc about the after life. your character said beauty is antithetical to understanding and intellectual curiosity I just wanna talk'

[sunblazes]

the seven was so so healing to watch oh my god

#it.Explored.Teenage girldom in a way i adore so fuckingg much #it was so silly and so fulof love AND THEIR PROBLEMS WERE SO LIKE.TEENAGE GIRLY #your family is struggling with money and You want to helpthey wont let you help you don’t know how to help #parents are always at work and you cant complain because thats not fair butyou wish they were there more #you have thiis group of friends you love with everything but it culminates in the intense fear of losing them #THE SISTERHOOD AT THE END OF IT ALL DEATH IS MOST AFRAID OOF DYING AHHHHHHHH THAT WAS FUCKING WILD #ANND THEN THE END WAS SO HEALING SO SO HEALING LIKKE FIXING EVERYTHING IN A WAY that whille not realistic Like I needed it.Like I coulldnt s #DTOP SMILING during the end #NOT TO MENTION HOW SICK THE FINAL BATTLE WAS the eidolons ohhmygod #it was seriously the funniest season and so heartfelt silly and had the rigght amount of serious moments like #the mirror scene with sam and onenelope Well jesuscrist literallu changed lives #deals with trauma in a way ii like Very ugly very raw (beautiful sam) #PLUS i know ifts so simple but.man.having a trans girl character Angry and powerful and making mistakes and so fullof love I dont know #sam nightingale is such a special character and sephie iis amazing

[natsmagi]

Ahhhhhhhhh possessive fem!Natsume, I'm weeping, I love it. This is also why I cling to the idea that Natsume did Tsumugi's piercings post-fine.

WAAAAA I LOVE THAT 😭😭 i love when natsumes Weirdness gets highlighted bc i feel like tsumugis usually takes priority just bc his is more shocking considering the contrast of his character as if natsume doesnt Also suck at respecting tsumugis boundaries and gets super "passive"-aggressive whenever mugi does something he doesnt like

theyre both horrible but thats what makes them perfect for each other and i love them

#toxic yuri remains ON TOP #ask #ohh plus the genuine love and care they hold for each other......... #theyre both just like. pretty fucked in the head and arent the best at showcasing it in the healthiest ways #although tbf its gotten WAYYY better in !!-era #i like it......... #their relationship feels so raw to me #bc like im sure many of us have gone through a period where we just cared So much for an individual and it had us acting out in bad ways #no harm was ever intended but ur emotions were just too strong and too passionate. or u failed to recognize the others feelings #i think it is very nice seeing this side of relationships be tackled #and letting the characters grow together and better themselves #unlearning their more toxic habits and learning to talk it out with each other #i love all elements of ntmg with my entire being but everything just hits so much harder when u acknowledge their faults in the past #and how comfortable they now are with one another in present days. so full of love and are capable of finally expressing it as such #its very comforting to me.... #ANYWAY I STARTED THINKING NTMG THOUGHTS AND ENDED UP RAMBLING #IM NORMAL ABOUT THEM #possessive natsume is so good thoguh #one of my favorite flavors

[nereb-and-dungalef]

yeah i think i'm just gonna factor "waiting until the hype dies down" into all my media experiences. watched some of the iwtv tv show and i get to keep all my opinions in my head. it's great

#i'm processing it. there's a degree of processing that also has to go in before posting. by the way #but i'm gonna post my commentary in the tags in case someone wants to idk. block me for my takes or something #very funny like. ppl saying the show is bad. like. as a fan of the originals: did you think the originals were *good*??? #(amendment: i fucking love the books. i just don't think they're good) #the show made some cringe choices. the episode where claudia fucks was a Very cringe choice #however. louis owning slaves in the original was also cringe. so #i think the vampire chronicles are some fantastic raw material #there's some really awesome concepts going on in them #the musical interprets it very well imo even if the songs are shit #the show making louis interesting was good enough to forgive lestat character assassination #also okay. the line they gave lestat like. 'well if you only want to kill evil people how can You tell who is and isn't evil?' #is. justification enough for lestat character assassination. so #idk. i'm only like four eps in #the episode where claudia fucks reaaaally turned me off the show tho it. might take a bit to get back into it #but the first episode was a religious experience i stg #even if i'm tired of the dead crazy brother trope #cw iwtv tv show #anyway. like i said this is really just for you to block me about. if you try to start drama i will block. i don't even post abt iwtv

[aftout]

Reading American Gods is like taking a peek into the world’s most toxic and doomed found family trope ever written, where everyone wants you dead but won’t let anyone outside of that lay as much as a fingertip on you. And every single time you go yayyyyy!

#I highly recommend this book if you haven’t read it. #being written in 2001 it is a bit outdated in its language and there are some parts that make me furrow my brow a bit #it’s to be expected. i don’t necessarily go into literature expecting modern purity #least of all when said book is written 22 years ago #but even with those flaws it is so incredibly thoughtful and— dare I say— diverse. Both in characters and experiences. #there’s something touching about a book written with spirituality in mind. Not in an organized way but in a raw and humane way #it’s thought provoking and unique; funny at times too. And the cast is memorable. #I love looking up the new names and terms related to mythology that I learn after finishing a chapter #the way Gaiman managed to modernize certain ancient deities is a type of ingenious #my mom was the one who recommended this book to me after I told her about Who’s Lila; funnily enough. I’m very grateful.

[curiosity-killed]

“Ask me so I can say yes.” 😭😭😭😭

#I have forgiven Victoria Goddard her perceived wrongs #I have NOT forgiven the fanfic authors who took Canonically Ace Character Who is EXPLICITLY Upset and Desiring of a Love That Does Not Rely #on Sex #and making so much of the relationship be about sec #*sex #I am also feeling seen in a very painful and mildly raw way #personal