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hoodharlow · 2 years

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Happy Birthday Moviestar

AN sorry this took long lol. i was gonna so something about the vmas and met gala but decided against it hope you enjoy <333

Requested? No

Warnings SMUTTT, angst (neelam says some things she should have) but overall cute shit bc it’s miriam’s birthday

Word Count 6.7k words

“Now I get why you didn't want to sit in my box seats.” Kendall Jenner told Miriam, noticing Jack sitting courtside next to Urban and Zack Bia with his team behind him.

"I don't like box seats in general." She shrugged.

Kendall gave her a knowing look and guided them to the section directly across from Jack's seats.

They were in Phoenix for the Suns and Warriors game. Miriam hitched a ride with Kendall from New York. She's been there for a little over a month filming another movie. She starred alongside Evan Mock and Isabela Gomez. It's a book adaptation to 'Placebo Junkies' and about a highschool dropout who lives in a rundown apartment with her boyfriend (played by Evan Mock) and her best friend (played by Isabela Gomez). Evan Mock's character has a terminal illness and Miriam's character starts doing medical trials to save up some money so they can take a trip. Throughout the film it showed the desperation Miriam's character goes through to make money after her best friend passes away and what can happen when drug trials are taken to extremes. What Miriam is most excited about is the ending because her character is an unreliable narrator, and it leaves the ending left to interpretation.

She got the role back in September, when she was getting ready for the Met Gala, Jeremy O. Harris was also getting dressed by Tommy Hilfiger, like her and Jack, and brought up the movie role. Jeremy is one of the producers for 'Placebo Junkies'. He claimed that it was ‘perfect for her’ because he read the script for ‘The Lies We Vow To' ,her movie with Oscar Isaac, and drew similarities between the characters. Filming for the movie started in early October and set to end in mid December. Though right they're taking a week long break since Isabela Gomez is promoting one of her projects and Evan Mock is gearing up for the second half of Gossip Girl. Coincidentally, Miriam's birthday is in the same week and Jack invited her to spend the week with him while he toured. He offered to fly her out first class, but she had already asked Kendall if she could fly with her.

She hadn't seen him in forever. After Lollapalooza Chicago, she went to New York to work on her Met Gala look with Tommy Hilfiger and Soni, Danny and Claudia's mom. They briefly reunited in London but they couldn't spend as much time as they liked because Jack was busy doing shows and interviews, but they were lucky to sit at the same table at the GQ awards dinner. She went because she was her dad's plus one. Mateo was awarded some type of athletic lifetime achievement award for his time at Chelsea. Soon after that, Jack began his US tour and she was working for fashion month.

Her phone buzzed and she pulled it out of her back pocket. It was a message from Jack. Miriam read it and rolled her eyes at his corny message about how he's rethinking his career choices because she looks good in a basketball jersey. She didn't even try to make her outfit look cute. She wore some high waisted boyfriend jeans and his black hoodie with a Warriors jersey over it. Kendall Jenner was dressed the same, except she wore her boyfriend's jersey.

Miriam looked across the court to him. She smirked seeing him sitting with his legs open. She typed out how yearned to drop to her knees and suck him right then and there, not caring that seventeen thousand people saw her. She watched him pull out his phone and read her message. He squirmed in his seat and subtly adjusted his pants. He met her gaze and discreetly flipped her off while he fixed his jacket.

Not long after warm-ups started. Miriam and Kendall took several pictures, posting them to their respective social media accounts. At some point Juan Toscano, number 95 from the Warriors, came by with Jordan to say hi to Miriam when Kendall went to go greet Devin. Jordan left to finish, leaving Miriam and Juan to catch up.

From across the court Jack took notice of how Miriam was laughing a little too hard at whatever Juan was telling her.

"Aw, she's wearing his jersey. They make such a cute couple." said Charlotte, one of Neelam’s influencer friends that was close to Jack's age.

Charlotte and Jack had a very brief fling a few years back. He met her in Birmingham at one of his shows. She was tall and blonde, nothing too interesting to keep him around. She became some sort of southern Belle influencer and according to Neelam, she grew a decent sized following a few months ago. Jack wanted nothing to do with Charlotte after they ended things but she managed to stay friends with Neelam and would sometimes get flown out to hang out with her.

"They're not a couple." Jack said curtly, squeezing his paper cup as Juan and Miriam shared a hug.

"I don't know, that looks like a couple to me," Charlotte said in a sing-song voice. She reached forward to rub Jack's arm and leaned in, "what are we doing after the game, handsome?"

Thankfully the game started and Jack could just pretend he didn't hear her. But that didn't stop her from trying to get his attention. Every few minutes, she'd try to touch his arm. It got to the point that Jack had to ask Urban to switch seats with him. At half-time, the Suns' mascot went up to him and gave him a personalized jersey for the shout out he gave them in the 'What's Poppin' remix. By the time the third quarter started, Jack's social battery drained and he wanted to go back to his hotel room.

He pulled out his phone to text Miriam just as she sent him a text that she was leaving the game early. He replied back that she should wait for him because he was planning on leaving as well but he head to check in with Neelam and Chris.

"Hey, I'm heading back to the hotel with Miriam." He told Chris in a hushed tone.

"Okay, text me when you get to the hotel." He said.

"You can't just leave. The game isn't over." Neelam whisper-yelled.

"It's just a basketball game." Chris reassured her.

"Whatever." She mumbled, crossing her arms.

"Jack, where are you going?" Charlotte asked him.

"I'm leaving." He said bluntly.

"Can I go with you?" She quickly gathered her things.

"No." He said, looking over to Urban with a 'you seeing this shit?' look.

He grabbed his things and shook hands with Urban and Zack. He nodded at Chris and was on his way. He spotted Miriam and Beto casually waiting for the valet to pull up with their rental.

"Hey," he said, letting her know he was there.

"Hi." She grinned.

Jack ached to touch her, to have his arms around her, but he couldn't. When they established that they're a couple they agreed to be private. It wasn't anyone's business either way. Their close friends and family knew, along with Jack's team because they wouldn't be able to hide it from them. Other than that nobody else knew. To the general public they were just really close friends that saw each other at a lot of events.

Though Miriam accidentally let her followers know she wasn't single when she posted a selfie of her with Daisy jumping over her to her Instagram stories. Her caption was 'when your dog hears your man's voice and wants to join your facetime.' She had called him panicking and apologized. He reassured her that it was okay. He gave her his consent that she can talk about him as long as she doesn't mention him by name or post anything that can be traced back to him because he knew how his fans could get. Even before they got together, some of them didn’t like that they were friends while some claimed that they're not real friends and only hang out for PR reasons.

The valet approached them and handed the keys to the rental to Beto. He stood back to make sure there weren't any paps as Jack guided Miriam inside the SUV.

Once inside the confines of the car, Jack pulled Miriam into a chaste kiss.

"I fucking missed you." He said, pressing their foreheads together.

"Really? Because from the looks of it you and blondie looked rather comfortable. Are you going to dedicate a verse from my song to her too?" She asked him in a playful tone, referring to the Chicken Shop Date video.

"For the millionth time, it was edited." He groaned.

When he filmed the Chicken Shop Date video, he was asked what the most romantic lyric he wrote was and he recited a verse from the song he wrote for Miriam a few months back. But the video editors cut it so it looked like he made up the verse off the top of his head for the host. Miriam was a bit annoyed with him when she saw the video because she thought the song was just between them. But Jack reassured her that the song was between them. Though he did plan to have that part of her song in another song about her.

"I know I just like teasing." Miriam giggled.

The car ride back to the hotel was quick. Jack handed her a copy of his key while her and Beto checked in. Chris was able to book a room for her and Beto in the same one they were staying at. Will she be sleeping in it? No, the night was still young and her and Jack had several weeks to catch up with each other.

Jack went ahead of her and quickly picked up the things he had laying on the ground. He fixed up the bed and fluffed up the pillows. A few minutes later the card reader pinged, opening the door and revealing Miriam.

She closed the door and ran to him, wrapping her legs around his waist. Jack bounced her bit, adjusting her legs so she wouldn't slip off him. They kissed as he carried them to the cloud gray arm chair. They pulled away, removing their sweaters and shirts. Miriam stayed in her lace and silk balconette bra while Jack stayed shirtless.

“Did this come with a matching thong?” Jack asked, toying with a strap.

“No, but I got matching cheeky panties.” Miriam shrugged.

“You always gotta make your smartass comments.” he mumbled.

“Isn’t that why you like me?” she smiled sweetly.

“No, it’s because of this ass.”

Jack pushed her up so that his hands were on her ass. With both hands, he kneaded her ass and then pressed her down on the growing tent of his pants. Miriam held his face as she leaned down to kiss his lips. They moaned into each other's mouths as Jack kept moving Miriam’s hips on him. He held them in place and pushed his hips up for a different sensation. After what felt like an eternity, he finally let them go and wrapped his arms around her waist as they continued their makeout session.

Kissing Jack was addicting and it didn’t help that he’s good at it. Miriam has known all that since their shared kiss back at his birthday kickback. One kiss made her want to have a million more. And having him all to herself like this, she couldn’t help but be greedy and only want to kiss him. Though that didn’t mean she didn't ache to have him fill her up.

“This is embarrassing.'' Jack panted, finally breaking their kiss.

“What?” Miriam asked before kissing down his jaw.

“I’m about to bust,” he groaned.

“Bust what?” she scrunched her face in confusion.

“What do you think, smartass?” he deadpanned gesturing to his crotch.

“Oh,” she giggled. Miriam got off his lap and kneeled on the rug. With her hands, she opened his legs a bit so she could fit properly in between them. She sat on her knees and gathered her hair into a ponytail. "You know I wasn't kidding when I said I would have let all those people see me just so I can have you in my mouth."

"Is that so?"

"Mhm," she hummed as stood up.

She gave him his back as she slowly pulled down her jeans. She adjusted her panties, pulling them up her hips to accentuate her ass more, and got back down on her knees. She reached forward and undid Jack's pants. He lifted his hips allowing her to pull them down along with his boxer-briefs. She grabbed them and tossed them aside.

"Damn, you weren't kidding when you said that you were about to bust." Miriam noted as she reached for his cock.

"I told– fuck, Miriam." Jack cursed when he felt her tongue circle around his tip.

She spit on it and slowly jerked him off with both hands. She slipped him as far as she could take him. He let out an incoherent sound until she reached the back of her throat. She did it a few more times, egging him on. She pulled away, with a trail of saliva spilling from the corner of her mouth, and kissed down his length.

Jack sat back in amazement watching her slip him back in her mouth. Miriam always left him in awe. She presented herself with such grace and elegance. It was hard to believe that she was the same girl that was giving him the sloppiest head he's ever received. It turned him on more that only he had the privilege to see this side of her. That she was his lil secret and her was hers.

"Jack," she called to him in a soft voice.

"Yes?" He asked, quirking an eyebrow at her.

He knew that tone all too well. It was the one she used when she wanted to get her way with something because she knew he was going to say no when she'd ask him for something.

"Can you please fuck my face?" She leaned her head on his thigh and gently rubbed the other one. She met his gaze with a pout. "Please."

"You always gotta get your damn way, huh." He mumbled, shaking his head.

Jack moved to the edge of the armchair and spread his legs more. He bent down and pulled her up her neck, claiming her lips with his. He let go of her neck and gathered her curls with one of his hands while Miriam unclasped her bra flinging it behind them. She got on all fours, finding it more comfortable for her get her face fucked than kneeling.

"Ready?" He asked her.

"Yes." She nodded eagerly.

"If it's too much–"

"I'll squeeze your wrist three times, I know." She cut him off, rolling her eyes in annoyance. "We've been over it hundreds of times."

"I'mma about to fuck that snarky attitude of yours."

"Please do." She smiled sweetly.

Jack didn't bother to give Miriam a response. He tightened the grip around her hair and guided his cock back in her mouth. They moaned in unison. He slowly bobbed her head up and down his length, getting used to her mouth. She took him a little deeper each time. He still wasn't a fan of deep throat but lucky for him, Miriam knew what she was doing and didn't take him with such brute force. Several minutes passed and Jack began to thrust his hips up as he held Miriam's head in place.

In front of them was a full length mirror mounted on the wall. Jack noticed one of Miriam's hands rubbing herself over her soaked through panties. He loosened his grip around her hair.

"Take them off." He motioned to her panties. "I wanna see you play with your pussy while I fuck your pretty mouth."

Miriam nodded. She rolled over and yanked them off, getting back into the position she was previously in. She opened up her legs more so that Jack could get a better of her. She opened her mouth to him, letting him know they can continue where they left off. She whimpered in pleasure as he slid in her mouth once more.

Jack's grunts filled the suite, egging Miriam on as she rubbed her clit. She was pleasantly overwhelmed, but she needed more. So she inserted her ring and middle fingers inside of herself. She thrusted her fingers at the same pace Jack fucked her mouth. A hard smack on her ass, caught her off guard and brought her to her climax.

Jack pulled her away from him, allowing her to fully come. She rested her head on the inside of his thigh. Her moans were raspy, almost inaudible. She pulled her fingers out and offered them to Jack. He gladly took them and licked them clean. He brushed back some of her curls, making her sigh contently.

"We can stop here." Jack said.

Miriam shook her head. "You haven't come yet which is why we're doing this in the first place."

"I don't want you to think you're obligated just because you came, Miriam."

"I don't feel obligated to go down on you. I genuinely like sucking your dick. If I didn't, I wouldn't be down here getting rugburns on my knees."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm a hundred percent positive."

"Alright, you can do your thing."

"Yay!" She clapped happily.

Miriam’s eyes never left Jack’s as she took him back in her mouth. His stomach began to contract after a few bobs, letting her know that he was close. Slowly, she pulled him out of her mouth until only his tip rested on her tongue. She widened her eyes, making her look more innocent as she stroked him.

"Fuck Miriam, let me come on that pretty face." He murmured.

She nodded and sucked his tip one last time before jerking him off. She closed her eyes, not wanting to get Jack's release on her eye like last time. She felt warm streaks land on her cheek, sliding down her neck while Jack repeated her name as he came.

Miriam sat back on her knees once Jack's climax ceased. She was a sight for sore eyes. Mascara ran down her flushed cheeks. Her lips were plump, swollen from them meeting the base of his cock every time he shoved her head down as he thrusted his hips up. Her hair clung to her neck thanks to Jack's release and her sweat.

"You okay?" Jack asked her, noticing her zoned out state.

"Yeah," Miriam nodded. She got up and sat on his lap. "Thank you, for doing all that. You didn't have to, I know you don't like head like that."

"I know. Like you said, if I really didn't want to, I wouldn't have let you go down on me." He said, wrapping his arms around her.

Miriam nodded in agreement. She nuzzled his chest. She tried stifling a yawn but exhaustion finally hit her. She was on set for a few hours before she flew out to Phoenix with Kendall. She didn't even nap during the four hour flight because she was so excited to see Jack.

"Let's shower and get ready for bed." He said, helping her up.

"Can you fuck me against the shower glass?" She asked as they made their wya to the bathroom.

"No, knowing you, you'd want me to twist you up into a pretzel when I fuck you and that shit is dangerous."

***

Jack stifled a yawn as he entered the hotel room. He was in Portland. The bus had arrived at the hotel just before midnight. It was almost six in the morning and he had set an alarm at four to go with Urban to get some doughnuts at 'Voodoo Donuts' for Miriam. It was her birthday and he wanted to surprise her with one of her favorite sweet treats.

"Where'd you go?" Miriam asked him as he climbed to bed. "I got cold without you here to hold me."

"I'm pretty sure you're only cold because you're sleeping in a thong and tank top." Jack murmured, pulling her to his chest. He kissed her shoulder. "Happy birthday moviestar."

"Thank you, but can we hold off until the sun's out?" She asked.

Jack hummed in response. He pulled the blanket, her tiger blanket that he stole from her before he left for tour, he wanted to have a piece of her to hold while he slept, over their bodies. They both fell back into a deep slumber.

Around seven, Jack’s phone began ringing. He cursed and reached behind him to the nightstand. Miriam stirred awake when she felt him get out of bed. She spotted him in the small living room area leaning against the back of the couch with the most annoyed look that she was all too familiar with. It usually happened when they were hanging out and Neelam would call him over to the studio. He hung up and walked back to bed with an apologetic look.

“What’s up?” she asked him as he plopped on the bed.

“Neelam scheduled three fucking radio interviews in the morning and one in the afternoon.” he mumbled into his pillow.

‘Of course she did.’ Miriam thought to herself, but she ended up responding, “And that’s bad because?”

“Because it’s your birthday and I brought you out here to spend it with you.” he turned his head to look at her.

“Jack, it’s okay. This isn't the first time I’m spending my birthday alone.” she leaned forward to brush back some of his curls.

“You’re not making it better.” He huffed and rolled onto his back, pulling her to his lap.

“I know what can make you feel better.” she said, pressing herself down on the growing tent in Jack's crotch. "Can I ride you?"

"I'd like that." He nodded.

Miriam nodded.

"But I want you to ride my face first.” he said, moving her hands away from his boxer-briefs.

"Oh my god, no!" She giggled.

"Why?" He sat up.

"I have thick thighs." She mumbled, embarrassed.

"So? I like thick thighs, especially yours." Jack murmured, kissing down her jaw as one of his hands crept inside her thighs. "I can tell it's warm. Can I please dive in?"

"If you–"

"Hold that thought." He cut her off.

Lyric inspiration hit him. Jack got out of bed and went where his backpack was. He unzipped a hidden pocket and pulled out a leather bound journal. He flipped through it until he found the page he titled 'Blade of Grass', quickly scribbling 'Thick thighs and I can tell it's warm, baby, can I please dive in?'.

"You good?" Miriam asked him as he shoved his journal back in backpack.

"Yeah," he nodded. He looked down at her thong covered sex and smirked, "that pussy of yours just gave me some inspiration for a song."

"I don't even wanna know." She scrunched up her face, cringing.

"Are you still riding my face?" He asked, laying on his back.

"If you wanna die."

"It'll be the most honorable way to go."

Jack checked his phone for the nth time. He was waiting for Miriam back in the suite because three hours before they had to be at the venue. He wanted to spend some time with her. A few days prior he had found a bakery near the venue he was performing at and ordered a small red velvet cake for Miriam. It was her favorite.

Jack tossed his phone on the bed hearing the keycard reader ping. Miriam entered the suite struggling to carry several shopping bags, so he got up and held the door open for her.

"Hi!" she said, tossing the bags on the ground. She turned behind her and grabbed the other bags Beto was holding for her along with a suitcase. "Thanks Beto, I'll text you later to head out."

She closed the door with her hips and placed the rest of her bags with the others. Miriam toed her sneakers off and took off her The North Face fleece jacket, staying in the white cropped white beater top she wore under. She pushed Jack on the bed and straddled his hips.

"I see you kept yourself busy." Jack nodded behind her at the large pile of Saint Laurent and Mario's shopping bags.

"After I watched Oscar Isaac die naked in Dune, I did some light shopping." She said, running hands over his chest.

"That's what you call light shipping?" He asked, arching an eyebrow at her.

"Yeah," she nodded, "you should see me in Milan and Paris. I empty the stores." A few seconds passed when she jumped off his lap and rummaged through her shopping bags. "That reminds me, I got you something."

He shook his head. He didn't like it when she spent money on him. "Miriam,"

"And before you're all 'it's your birthday you shouldn't have bought me something', this is purely for selfish reasons because I plan on wearing it when I visit you." She pulled out a white puffer jacket. Handing it to him, she said, "Mira, it's Moncler."

"I know these cost over twelve hundred. I can’t accept it.” he protected.

"Jack, if it makes you feel better we can say it's my jacket that I let you borrow." Miriam reasoned sarcastically.

"Fuck that," he frowned.

"You're helpless. Just take the fucking jacket."

"Fine." He grumbled, slipping on the jacket. It fit him perfectly. It wasn't too big but it was loose enough in the way he liked. "Thanks for the jacket."

"And maybe we can go to my grandpa's place in Aspen and I can ride you while wearing it."

"I'll buy you some snow boots so– wait, your grandpa has a place in Aspen?"

"Yeah, my white grandpa's family owns a small chain of ski lodges in Colorado. When they cut my grandpa off, he was lucky to already have his own lodge-cabin thing. We always go there for Christmas with my other grandparents."

"Why was your grandpa cut off?"

"They're racist and hate my abuela because she's Mexican." She shrugged. "Now let's change the topic. Did you figure out what song you're cutting so you can perform 'Yikes'?"

"How'd you know I'm performing that?"

"I overheard you and your DJ last night on the bus."

"Damn I was gonna surprise you." He fake- pouted.

"Oh well." Miriam giggled, pulling the jacket's hood over Jack's head.

"This got awkward." He pointed out after a few seconds of awkward silence.

"It did."

"C'mon let's cut your cake." He said pulling over to sit on the bed.

"Stop! You didn't get me a cake." Her eyes brimmed with tears.

He nodded. "Red velvet too."

"Fuck Jack!" She cried. She wrapped her arms around his body. "You're the best, you know that right?"

He smirked proudly. "I do."

He propped his phone at the vanity so he could record them while Miriam facetimed her parents on her phone. Everyone sang to her and she blew out the candles. She talked to parents while Jack got his things ready for tonight's show. Miriam hung up half an hour later and started to get ready.

Since she didn't get the dresses custom made, like she does when she buys at the Paris YSL store, they didn't fit as well as she liked. The champagne colored crushed velvet dress didn't even have adjustable straps and it made her breasts look weird. Miriam ended up going with the outfit she had originally packed. It was a black open front, long sleeve Jacquemus crop top that was held together in the front with a dainty gold plaque of the brand's logo and dusty pink high waisted cargo pants that matched the laces of her Dutch Green Air Jordans.

She then went to the bathroom to do her hair and makeup. She had straightened her hair earlier that day, but it rained thus making her hair curly once more. So she just clipped it back and did two little braids to frame her face. For makeup, she went with a more laid back look with a subtle eyeliner, soft contour, and some gloss. She felt her eyes a bit naked so she decided to put on some lashes that weren't too out there.

"Miriam, your phone's blowing up." Jack called from the bed as she tried to connect the strip to her inner corner.

"Give me a sec!" She yelled back as she wiggled the tweezers.

"Holy shit!" He exclaimed.

"What?"

"Why didn't you tell me?" He said walking in the bathroom.

"'Peraté…okay, got it." She said finally getting her eyelashes on.

"Is this what you were doing when you facetimed me in the orange wig?" Jack handed her his phone.

He remembered when she left for fashion month, she had to leave New York three days in because she needed to be in London for three weeks. Every time she’d call to facetime him, she’d be in a ginger wig similar to one Rihanna wore in 2015. Jack would have asked her about it, but he was too excited to hear her voice that he’d forget to ask.

Miriam looked down and saw a picture of her and Robert Pattinson on set for The Batman. She remembered that scene specifically. It was when her character and Bruce Wayne arrived at some funeral and were making small talk to someone who was running for mayor. It was posted from The Batman's official instagram account. The caption said 'happy birthday to @mdominguezmiller, our very Pamela Islas.' Poison Ivy’s original name is Pamela Isley but because Miriam’s Mexican, they changed her last name to fit her. The writers even hinted that her character was bisexual because some adaptations make her straight.

"No mames." She said to herself.

"Why didn't you tell me you were going to be in the fucking Batman?" Jack asked her. "That's amazing!"

"Well I signed an NDA and I have at most like five minutes of screen time. I didn't want to risk them getting cut. I didn't want to be like Madison Beer when she was like 'I was supposed to be in the video' when thank u next came out." She explained as she read through the comments.

She frowned. A bunch of people, mostly white men, are saying how she doesn't fit the character because she's not white and how they should have gone with a white woman and not some 'wetback' for diversity points. Others were saying she got the role because of her mom and how it wasn't fair. Her mom didn't even know she auditioned until she got the role. She auditioned back in 2019 while she was filming 'In the Heights'. The general public didn't even know she existed. Her instagram at the time was private. She barely had 20k subscribers on YouTube, all she did were fashion reviews and shopping hauls. Thanks to her joining in on one of Claudia's reaction videos in mid 2020, she started getting more subscribers. And that was because Claudia had to use a clickbait title. It wasn't until September of last year that she got on tiktok because she did one with her brother. Lastly her Twitter is a mess and tweets out the most absurd shit. Obviously, it's not like they hired her because of her social media presence.

"Here." She said to Jack, handing him his phone back.

His face softened, noticing her frown. "What's wrong?" He asked her.

"Nothing." She sighed, hopping down the counter.

"Miriam," he lifted her chin so she could look at him. "Tell me."

"People are being stupid in the comments." She sighed. "They're saying I only got to be Poison Ivy because of my mom and there are a few racist comments saying I can't be Poison Ivy because I'm latina. It's fine, people are dumb."

"Hey, you should feel proud that you get to star in one of the most anticipated movies ever. People never know the hard work you put it in no matter how hard you try to show them what you do to be where you are. They don't care, they just wanna talk shit. Trust me I would know, me and Nas have a whole song about it."

"I'm gonna repost some stuff then delete instagram for a few hours."

"Sounds like a plan. While you're at it, you should see what I posted." He grinned mischievously.

Miriam eyed him suspiciously then searched him up. His account loaded and she tapped on his instagram story. It was a picture of her with her cheeks stuffed with mille-feuille while she and Jack listened to the director of the Creme de la Creme promo tour video. At the bottom it said, 'happy birthday moviestar.'

"Of all fucking pictures you could've posted Jack"

“Noise canceling my ass.” Urban murmured as the couple exited the storage closet.

Miriam smacked Jack’s arm. “Te dije, he was going to hear us.”

Jack laughed and placed his arm around Miriam as they walked back to his dressing room.

“I don’t even know how you two were still horny. I heard you go at it at least three times back at the hotel.” Urban asked, lighting up a blunt.

“Jack we gotta get you mic'd up.” Chris waved him over.

“Shit, I gotta go.” Jack sighed.

“It’s okay. Me and Urban are gonna go to our balcony seats with Beto, who’s saving them for us.” she said.

“Keep an eye on her.” Jack said, doing his handshake on her.

“I don’t need a babysitter.” she frowned.

“Miriam, you have a bodyguard,” he argued.

“It’s different.”

“Enlightened me.”

“Don’t you have to get ready to go on stage?”

Jack rolled her eyes. He leaned down and gave her a peck. He gave Urban another hand shake then went to where Chris and some crew members were.

“I gotta get my camera, c’mon.” Urban motioned Miriam to follow him.

They flashed security backstage passes and entered the greenroom. Neelam, Metta and the blonde girl that was at the Suns and Warriors game were hanging out by the couch. They stopped talking when they saw her enter the room. They made a face and talked in quiet voices. Not wanting to make some awkward small talk, Miriam went to the snack table and grabbed a slice of pizza. She was hungry. After she and Jack cut her cake, Jack showed her how proud he was of her for her movie role with his tongue and cock. Then when they got to the venue, her and Jack went to go see The Homies perform before they snuck out for a quickie.

“That isn’t for you. It’s for the people that actually work.” Neelam told her, startling her.

Miriam never felt so embarrassed in her life. “Oh, I’m sorry. I–”

“You what? You think that you deserve to get everything handed? If you want food, then go get some.”

“You’re right. I apologize.” Miriam said coldly, trying to hold back tears. She dug in the front pocket of her pants, pulling out a wad of $100 bills. She counted five and tossed them on the table. “I’m sure that covers the slice. Urban, I’ll see you on the balcony.”

Based on the fear in Neelam’s eyes, she had no idea Urban was in the room. Miriam exited the room not wanting to deal with her. She sniffled and wiped the few tears that rolled down her cheek. No one has ever talked to her the way Neelam had. When she came with Jack to drop off his things, he told her that she could herself to whatever and that he even got jalapeño kettle chips for her.

“Miriam, hold up.” Urban called to her, jogging. He reached for her arm, stopping her. “What the fuck was that?”

“I’m sorry. Jack said that I could help myself. I should have asked.” She apologized.

“What?–That’s not…was that the first time Neelam has talked to you like that or have you had other run-ins with her?” he asked her. Miriam’s silence answered his question. “Does Jack know?”

“No, because it’s not a big deal.”

“You can’t be serious! She just went off on you unprovoked.”

“Okay when you say it like that…”

“Bro,”

“Urban, she’s Jack’s manager. I’m not going to say anything because it’ll risk his career.” her eyes softened. “Please promise me, you’re not going to tell Jack.”

“Fine, but if some shit like this happens again, I’m telling him,” he warned her.

They pinky promised and went to the balcony area. Beto was texting, ignoring the red head trying to make conversation with him.

“Want some?” Urban asked her, offering his new blunt as they sat down.

“I don’t smoke.” Miriam said. She’s too paranoid for weed. Alcohol already made her anxious as is and to add weed into the mix, was not good for anyone.

“You?” He offered it to Beto.

“On the clock.” Beto said.

Miriam furrowed her eyebrows. “Since when do you smoke?”

“Miss Dominguez I have a life outside of making sure you don’t fight paparazzi.'' He said, sipping his water bottle.

“It was one time and it was before you were even hired.”

“Since I’ve been hired you haven’t had any incidents.”

“Can I post this?” Miriam asked Jack as he walked out of the bathroom in only a towel wrapped around him.

He leaned down to see her phone, tugging the towel off to dry himself. It was a selfie she took of them in the elevator when they were coming back from the show. Jack was in a black puffer jacket with his back to the camera. Miriam’s face was also hidden thanks to the hoodie she wore.

“Go ahead,” he nodded, grabbing another towel to dry his hair.

“Okay, thank you.”

Miriam skipped the opening credits to the new Bob’s Burgers episode she was binging on her laptop. She switched out of her camera roll to Instagram. She fixed the lighting in the picture then typed out her caption. ‘Happy to spend my Jordan year with my favorite person, and ty to everyone for the birthday wishes.🤍🤍🤍’ She hit post and then connected her phone to her charger.

Jack finally got in bed and pulled her to his chest. They ate some of the cake while they watched their show. After a few episodes, Miriam yawned, nuzzling her head against his chest. She lifted her head and brought her hands up to his chest so can rest her head on them. She looked up at Jack and gave him a soft smile.

"Thank you." She said, tenderly scratching his beard.

"For what?" He asked her.

"For today, I know you were busy but you somehow made time for me. And I…" Miriam quickly clamped her mouth shut.

She almost said a certain three worded sentence. A certain three worded sentence she's never said to any of her past partners. Except for Conner, the first boyfriend she had, and that massively backfired on her. Because of him she couldn't say them to Kaleob and she really adored him. And yet here she was ready to say them to Jack as Bob's Burgers played in front of them while they gorged on red velvet cake.

"You what? You kinda stopped talking." Jack said, bringing her back from her thoughts.

"Oh, sorry" she giggled nervously. She cleared her throat. "I, um, I'm glad I got to be here with you. It's one of the best birthdays I've had in a while."

"Me too. I…I'm glad you had a great day despite everything."

Miriam pushed herself up and pecked his lips. He tucked a curl behind her ear and asked her, "What would you rate this birthday?"

"Definitely in my top twenty-three birthdays."

Taglist: @cherryxcreme @youngharleezyxo @deannaard @meyocoko @babyharleezy

#jack harlow smut #jack harlow angst #jack harlow fluff #jack harlow one shot #jack harlow fanfic #jack harlow imagine #jack harlow series #jack harlow x oc #jack harlow drabble #jack harlow oneshot #jack harlow fan fic #jack harlow fanfiction #jack and miriam

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paperstorm · 1 year

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Agreed that it's interesting how they're approaching the different "begins" episodes. Judd&Grace are a straightforward, solid couple, so they get a straightforward linear narration of how they got together. TK is our NDE MVP, so his past/patterns reveals are usually connected to NDEs. Carlos has such a barrier within himself about thinking about or dealing with his past, that we don't actually get to see the scenes, we only learn the impact his past has on his present/future and it's only revealed when he's forced by circumstances to reveal it. Marjan is someone who's always had a firm sense of identity, and she was going through a bit of an identity-crisis, so she hallucinates about events in her life that helped build that part of her identity originally. Mateo is a movie/tv buff, so his past is revealed Wandavision-sitcom-telenovela style. I love this show so much!!

Yesssss it’s so good!! This is a great breakdown, I have nothing to add

#911ls asks

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mashedwriting · 20 days

Text

Character List

* = platonic only

Comic Books

Music Meister

Squirrel Girl*

Loki

Scott Pilgrim vs The World

Scott Pilgrim

Ramona Flowers

Matthew Patel

Gideon Graves

Young Neil*

Knives Chau*

Wallace Wells

Star Trek

Spock*

Uhura*

Data*

Reanimator

Herbert West

Dan Cain

Batman Forever

Edward Nygma

Two-Face

Bruce Wayne

Dick Grayson*

Gotham

Jim Gordon

Edward Nygma

Jervis Tetch

Oswald Cobblepot

Fish Mooney

Jerome Valeska

Selina Kyle*

Bruce Wayne*

Victor Zsasz

Barbra Kean

Jonathan Crane*

Superstore

Jonah

Amy

Cheyenne*

Dina

Garret

Glenn

Mateo

Brooklyn 99

Terry Jeffords

Kevin Cozner*

Jake Peralta

Charles Boyle

Ray Holt*

Amy Santiago

Rosa Diaz

Gina Linety

Dr Who

9th Doctor*

Rose Tyler*

Bendy and the Ink Machine

Sammy Lawrence

Alice Angel

Joey Drew*

Wally Franks

Bertrum Piedmont

The Stanley Parable

Narrator

Stanley*

Bill and Ted

Bill S Preston Esquire

Theadore Logan

Back to the Future

Emmet Brown*

Marty Mcfly

Ferris Bueller's day off

Ferris Bueller

Labyrinth

Jareth

Blithe Spirit

Charles

Ruth

Elvira

Scream

Billy Loomis

Stu Macher

My ocs and friend’s ocs!!

If you have ideas for fandoms I should join/write for, send an ask and I’ll check it out! :]

#☆~character list

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haloburns · 2 months

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when i was writing the early relationship between danny and mateo I was like "are they moving too fast??? what if someonenthinks six months is too soon to say i love you????" bc i always thought i was a "take it slow" kinda person

(narrator voice: they were very very wrong(

bc now here i am, four-ish months into my very own brand new relationship, dropping i love yous every hour on the hour (only a slight exaggeration), dreaming abt when we can finally move in together and what our house might look like and other grossly (affectionate) coupley shit like that and im like

huh

guess i shoulda seen that one comin from a mile away, huh?

#the answer is i had trauma that made me want to take things slow #but at my center i am made from and of love #and i want to give that to everyone all the time #and as ungoth as it is to admit (tho it is very punk) i am a romantic at heart and i always have been #my heart was just damaged #this is brought to u by my current daydreams abt buying a house in my historic downtown and painting it a 'garish' color #and also just wanting to being mushy abt my partner bc i love him dearly

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welcometololaland · 2 years

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I love love love your Tennis AU. If you don’t mind: what went through Carlos’ head when he had to play against TK, after the match and when he thought TK was missing? I would really like to hear your thoughts on those scenes. :)

🚨🚨🚨SPOILERS FOR LOVE GAME🚨🚨🚨

Carlos vs. TK - this one has a special place in my heart. I've adapted something I wrote in a response to a comment left on Ao3. I hope no one minds!

I tossed and turned about Carlos vs. TK for ages before I wrote it - who would win, how it would play out, how they would approach it. It was really clear to me as soon as I'd written chapter 3 and 4 that Carlos was the logical winner. Many people (including myself) were rooting for TK, but at this point in the fic, Carlos is written as the better player, so I think his win was inevitable. TK has a skillset that is very niche and an undeniable natural talent, but Carlos has been working his ass off while TK has been on hiatus. Carlos is primed and ready and TK is still dusting off the cobwebs.

Obviously, chapter 5 is TK POV, and TK is a bit of an unreliable narrator at times. He's hot headed and quick to temper, and I think that coloured his perception of Carlos here. Yes, the net thing appeared rude, and seemed out of character for Carlos, but TK doesn't give him the benefit of the doubt, so I intentionally left that point unclear (Carlos really did apologise, TK just didn't see it).

As to Carlos' feelings during the match, my view is that Carlos is a consummate professional in every universe. He has a serious allergy to letting anyone down. He simply CANNOT not try. He had to win this match, and I believe that to do that, he had to almost turn himself on auto pilot and just focus on playing the best tennis he could. He had to, because there was no option to concede and compromise on his morals or his sponsors or all of his training. TK means a lot to Carlos - but we know Carlos has a very strong understanding of right and wrong, and I don't think it was wrong for him to try and win in the circumstances. Actually, it would have been wrong of him to throw the match, even though he KNOWS it will upset TK.

As Carlos says in chapter 6, I think he put his blinkers on, and once he saw TK was losing the plot, just played the most aggressive game he could to end the match quickly. I think it really hurt him to see TK hurting, and he would have wanted to be a source of comfort for him. So knowing he was not only not able to be that source of comfort, but in fact was the source of the discomfort, would have been extremely difficult for Carlos.

After the match, I think Carlos went and did his post match press conference, cool down and massage. I think he spoke with his team about how worried he was that he'd upset TK. I think Paul (who has always seen right through him) probably helped a lot by convincing Carlos that TK would eventually forgive him. Tommy would have stroked his hair and told him that he made the best out of a bad situation. Andrea would have hugged him and praised him for having a big heart. Gabriel would have patted him on his (uninjured) shoulder and said "you did what you had to do, mijo" and Tío Fernando would have had no sympathy for TK at all 😂 Tío Fernando I see as a great guy - just very utilitarian, and we come to see that he softens towards TK later.

Lastly, Carlos would have been a complete mess by the time 4 hours had passed. I believe he would have wanted to think the best of TK - that he hadn't gone and relapsed - but certainly the story TK told him in Paris would have been playing on his mind. He would have texted Judd, Nancy and Mateo incessantly, asking for any updates. He would have texted TK over and over. He would have called TK so many times his voicemail filled up. He would have gone out for a quick walk around the block himself and then run back to the hotel just in case he missed TK coming in, and then sat on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands when TK wasn't there. I didn't write Carlos as particularly religious in this fic (although his family is Catholic), but I think he would have prayed anyway. He would have been constantly asking himself what he could have done better, or whether he should have withdrawn, or whether he should have let TK win.

I don't think he would have been thinking about his feelings for TK necessarily - I think in that moment he would have been far more concerned for TK's health and safety. He just wanted TK to come back to him in one piece, and then he'd deal with whatever came next.

Sorry for the long explanation! I have a lot of feelings about Carlos vs. TK, and I know a lot of other people did too!

Love Game - Chapter 5 - Volley

#tarlos #tennis au #love game #tennis au spoilers #love game spoilers #chapter 5 #volley

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lire-casander · 1 year

Text

as the world shifts off its axis

[1,280 words] [teen and up audiences] [beta'ed by the always wonderful @morganaspendragonss. special thanks to @moviegeek03 for her constant support and her hand-holding.] [tk strand] [angst, tk is an unreliable narrator, little to no dialogue, spoilers for s04e01 the new hotness, religious discussion, mentions of recovery]

it seems i'm back for the time being! this story has been written in bits and pieces throughout the day, in between work meetings and arguments with my boss. all in all, i don't think it's taken me over an hour and half to put it together, which is a record for me. religious discussion comes from pope francis' interview to associated press, recovered from the cbs news webpage. i think it could be used to understand where carlos is coming from and his reasons. it's also a way for me to sort through the feelings of being a catholic bisexual woman within this twenty-first-century church.

His fiancé is already married. To a woman — to his best friend. As much as he tries to wrap his head around the fact, he can't.

as the world shifts off its axis

part 8 of as the world whirls

catch up on the series on ao3 | read on ao3

He leans into the wall once he's left on his own. A sigh escapes his lips, a puff of air finding its way into existence. He rubs a hand against his eyes as he tries to make sense of what he's just learned.

There's no way he would have believed it if anyone had told him three years ago.

His fiancé is already married. To a woman — to his best friend. As much as he tries to wrap his head around the fact, he can't.

Carlos Reyes is married to Iris Blake. They've been married for years. They've been married for longer than he's known Carlos. They go way back — back to high school, back to when Carlos needed a mirage of normalcy to get through his days.

As much as he understands the reasons behind Carlos' decision to tie the knot with Iris, it's still a hard pill to swallow. His mind is racing ten miles a second as he thinks about the implications that Carlos' confession has — how their whole life, his whole life in Austin since he decided to take a leap of faith and grab Carlos' hand on top of the Camaro, everything they've built together is now a lie. Has been a lie all this time.

Their love is built on an omission of truth that Carlos has been keeping close to his chest for years.

He can feel anxiety and dread pooling in equal measure in his gut. He takes a deep breath, then another one, but the feeling isn't budging. He can't shake it.

Carlos hadn't told him because he never thought they'd reach a moment when he'd need to come clean. Carlos never thought they'd get past the fun stage of their relationship, they'd never make it to serious stuff like living together or getting engaged.

Carlos never thought a New York firefighter turned paramedic transplant with an opioid problem would be his forever.

There's a staccato tapping grilling his nerves. He looks up from where his eyes have been inspecting the floor to tell Mateo to stop it — because it's always Mateo — only to find out that he's all alone in the dormitory. The bunk beds are aligned in perfect rows, the pillows glaring at him as he searches the room.

His own fingers are abusing the wall behind his back, playing a hard tune to the turmoil that dominates his soul. When he lifts his hand to assess the damage, he can see he's drawn blood from knocking too hard on the wall. He sighs again.

The thoughts keep piling up in heaps of heat and dread in his mind. His soul is torn between the need to understand why Carlos hadn't trusted him with this secret before and the sheer belief that Carlos loves him dearly. But there are underlying issues, things unsaid, that press against everything he's ever known to be true. There's the fear of being left behind; the knowledge that he isn't good enough to be put first, a belief that's tattooed in his soul. But Carlos has proven, once and again, that he doesn't care about anything but their happiness. Sure, there's been a few bumps along the way.

But love has trumped them all.

Still, he's married. To a woman. A small, tiny detail that Carlos could have disclosed before — when they first moved in together, when he bought a loft and put both their names in the deed, when he said yes at 3:18 in the morning. He chose not to.

Carlos purposefully kept him in the dark about his past.

He isn’t sure how they’ll be able to come back from that. If there’s a way back from a lie like this one.

The television is on when he reaches the open common room. Mateo is tinkering with the remote until he settles for a news channel, where the anchorwoman is unveiling a recent interview with Pope Francis, who apparently has something to say about gays.

Paul watches him as he enters the space and flops himself down on the couch. “Pope Francis has called laws criminalizing homosexuality fundamentally unfair, since being homosexual is not a crime,” the blond woman is reading from the cue in front of her. “However, he remains unmoving in the fact that engaging in homosexual activities is sinful, and same-sex unions are still out of the question in the Catholic Church because God cannot bless sin.”

“Nonsense,” Judd mutters under his breath. His voice is thick with disbelief. “How come homosexuality is not a crime, but is it a sin?”

And then, in just seven words, his world is upended.

Homosexuality is not a crime, but it is a sin.

There's a finality in those words, a sense of supremacy that fills all the spaces in his soul that could have been open to listening. He's Jewish — albeit not really observing, not anymore even though he's been trying to do better since his mom passed away — so he doesn't have to fold into what some old man at the Vatican preaches to his Catholic followers. But Carlos does.

Carlos has been listening to what Catholic Popes have been preaching his whole life. And those Catholic priests and religious minds have repeatedly told him, in no uncertain terms, that the way he was — the way he is — is a sin. There's nothing worse than going to Hell, he knows that. He closes his eyes, his knuckles white around the chip he's recently earned during his group therapy, as he searches for calmness.

No doubt Carlos thought there wasn't any other way around to normalcy. His parents hadn't acknowledged his identity when he'd come out to them. His Church considered — still considers — him to be unworthy of Heaven because of who he loves. Iris Blake had been his only option at having a somewhat normal life; she'd been someone Carlos had cared deeply for, his best friend in his own words. His fiancé had been lost and had felt unsafe for most of his life; he'd thought he'd had a chance at happiness that way.

And then Iris had disappeared. And, with her, Carlos' opportunity to be deserving of salvation according to his upbringing.

"You okay?" he hears Judd asking, voice muffled by the hammering of his own heart against his ribcage. "Brother?"

He manages to nod slightly. He opens his eyes to a different show on the screen, to Mateo flirting unashamedly with Nancy, to Paul and Marjan teasing them endlessly.

"I am," he whispers, smiling softly at Judd.

He will be, he's sure of that.

Because, despite everything, Carlos chose him. Despite the struggles, despite him always running away, despite Carlos' fear of rejection from his own family, they've remained strong. Even through the worst breakup of his whole life — and he's had a few, including the one that led him to Austin and eventually to Carlos — their love has been the beacon guiding him through the darkness.

He can't shake his own pain and his abandonment issues that have flared up in the span of a few minutes. He isn't supposed to.

That's why he picks up his phone and shoots a quick text to Cooper, a simple convo after meeting tonight?

And that's why he swipes at the screen until he finds the dream venue contact info and presses the dial button. Once the call is picked up, he says in the steadiest voice he can muster, "This is TK Strand. You called my fiancé earlier today. I'm calling to confirm that we're taking the date. Eight weeks from now."

There should be enough time, he hopes. After all, love should conquer everything, in the end.

#as the world whirls #angst #tk strand is an unreliable narrator #spoilers for s04e01 the new hotness #mentions of recovery #religious discussion #little to no dialogue #tk strand #911ls fic #911 ls fic #911 lone star fic #911ls fanfic #911 ls fanfic #911 lone star fanfic

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izzielizzie · 2 years

Note

POVs have been released. Thoughts?

i'm unsurprised but,,, kind of disappointed? i expected phoebe and nate as narrators bc phoebe had the most going on by the end of oouin, and karen has repeatedly said nate is her favorite.

i wasn't expecting maeve because her narration has always seemed the weakest in oouin (i've noticed that karen's strong narrations in the oou world are always comparable to some other narrator in one of her stand-alones, but i've never had a perfect maeve comparison).

since nate is a narrator, i didn't expect to have bronwyn, especially since the rojas sisters have been narrating for two books in a row. also it doesn't make sense to have someone who doesn't live in bayview anymore narrate.

knox and nate are too similar. you can't have both.

coop is in the same boat as bronwyn — he's too far removed from bayview now. same argument for kris bc he lives in san diego and he really is a minor character.

addy is unsurprising. if there's an important character, they'll have a connection to her. the only other pov character i can think of who shares that trait is maeve. addy is the sister-in-law of knox's employer. she's phoebe's neighbor. she's besties with the b4 and their partners (partners being kris lol). she's friends with maeve, and she works with luis. ads just makes sense (plus the mystery is def going to revolve around her but that's for my next post).

but what i'm really disappointed about is luis. only two characters have had direct influence in both mysteries, and it's maeve and luis. the rojas sisters have had their moment in the sun (and honestly i'd be upset if it was extended) but luis has been there since day one. he got the license plate numbers, he stood up for coop, he got the video for knox. those things feel small but they had really important repercussions. i guess it's just annoying to see luis as a plot device for two books but then not get recognition.

also, luis is connected to everyone too. he's best friends with cooper and addy and kris. he works with phoebe and he seems friendly with knox (plus he's dating knox's ex). he's dating bronwyn's sister, and nate is his girlfriend's brother in every way but blood relation. plus if it really is jake who's back (see more in next post) then we need his narration. the story won't feel complete without it.

plus it kind of feels like karen has toyed with the idea of a luis narration because mateo and jonah sound a lot like luis would if he had a narration. it's really disappointing not to have him as a narrator.

and in terms of relationships, i feel like maybe cooper/kris and maeve/luis will be sidelined just because of the narrators. natewyn isn't going anywhere, they are the couple of the oou world. and phoebe and knox have a lot of development in their future. coop/kris and maeve/luis are just going to be on the sideline which is disappointing bc we haven't had a lot of cooper/kris and maeve/luis are just starting to date and there's a lot of stuff like trust issues to get through before they're stable.

#ooui #oouin #oouib #one of us is lying #one of us is next #one of us is back #bronwyn rojas #nate macauley #addy prentiss #cooper clay #kris (oou)#maeve rojas #luis santos #knox myers #phoebe lawton #oouib spoilers #one of us is back spoilers

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a-lilacsong · 1 year

Text

A fanfiction in which Armando saves Avalor

“Armando! Marlena! You have to help us!” exclaimed Luisa as she and Francisco ran into the room. “Huh? What’s wrong!?” Marlena replied, almost dropping the Danaus plexippus she was holding. “Oh, sorry to interrupt you two from your caterpillar counting, but we have an emergency at the palace!” “That’s alright,” replied Armando “there’s still a few days until the next caterpillar race, we have time, what’s wrong?” “Well, I was looking out the telescope at the observatory earlier today,” Francisco explained “when at exactly 4:44 in the morning, on this day on the 4 months of the year, on the 4 year of the decade-” “I think they get the point about the date, how it lines up with the prophecy.” “You’re right mi amor, I just never thought I’d live to see this day…the day a giant meteor that shown bright as a star fall from the sky, gently bounced off several clouds, and landed directly on the palace.” Armando stiffened, out of all the legends he’d ever heard it his life this one inspired the most fear and awe in him. Marlena noticed his anxiety and took his hand in hers; it made them both feel mildly more at ease. “And we don’t know what to do, I’m from a chocolate making family, I don’t know much about this. But with your family’s background you are the expert on this kind of thing. So, we need your help” said Luisa “or else according to the prophecy…” “…It would vaguely become a big nuisance.” “Si.” Armando nodded “Then I’ll give it my best shot!”

Clippity-clop Clippity-clop Clippity-clop Clippity-clop (they rode on horses to the palace) Now the universe is vast and unfathomable, everything we see is but a fraction of its majesty. There is so much out there beyond human understanding, even within the understandable, from the forces which dictate the movements of electrons, to what truly happens to matter inside a blackhole. Humans have not yet discovered the answer to these mysteries, and maybe they never will. But one thing is certain, when confronted by the answer to one of these great mysteries, everyone will have a different reaction. When our heroes arrived at the palace, a spectrum of reactions is what they saw.

Cheese was everywhere, people were running around screaming, casually chatting with each other, twirling around, touching the cheese, not touching the cheese, and doing ever more noticeable things as well. “Who needs sea shanties when we can sing cheese shanties!” yelled Naomi, who proceeded to sing nothing, for she did not know any cheese shanties. Victor was standing with one hand over his heart, the other in a fist he shook at the sky “Way must the sky tempt me so? It knows that cheese is the best thing of all to steal, and yet, if I were to steal it I would rid myself of everything I hold dear! And yet, temptation remains, way cruel fate, WHY?!” Carla was facing the wall, with the air of a teacher educating the masses “Did you know that on the planet Skelecki, they put their cheese into orbit so it can become fluffy from zero gravity?” she said. Gabe was standing beside her also looking at the wall, “I did not, did you know that in the delta quadrant, a creature called a grakel produces a milk was called schplict, which can be used to make a green colored cheese?” “I did not, did you know that did you know that-” this conversation had probably done on like that for a while. Mateo was on the floor, touching the cheese. He was constructing a terrible effigy into the cheese, it looked reminiscent of a cartoon electric mouse, but it the shape on a man. It was unsetting. Ixlan was just standing there, expressionless “As you can see, I am filled with a sense of awe in the universe.” (Anyone I, the narrator, have not specifically mentioned has ether yet to be mentioned, or just wasn’t there at the palace that day, it was a pretty slow Saturday after all, minus this main problem.) “Wow,” said Marlena “I never knew people could have such strong reactions over cheese from outer space.” “They where here when it collided with the palace, so it’s probably one of these ‘you had to be there’ situations.” “That makes sense.” Dr. Crabington, the palace’s beloved doctor was walking in a straight line past them. Their eight tiny, exoskeleton covered legs moving them straight forward instead of sideways! “Oh no!” exclaimed Francisco, “Even Dr. Crabington, the palace’s beloved doctor is affected! Will no one be able to escape the influence of the majestic space cheese!?” “How did this cheese even get here, where did it come from?” asked Marlena. Armando put his hand on his chin, “If I remember correctly, its because our galaxy…” She nodded “The milky way galaxy…” “Is made of mostly milk, and when there’s milk there’s often…” “Cheese!” “Yes, and when the stars and calendars are in alignment, the celestial cheese will intersect with planets and cause glitches with reality.” “And who better to fix those glitches than the royal glitch fixer.” Said Francisco. Armando smiled.

“Hay where are our nietos?” asked Luisa “normally they are in the middle of problems of this magnitude.” “Oh I know where they are” said the ghost of Lucia “Hi mom, hi dad.” “Hola mija,” replied Luisa “it’s good to see you aren’t affected by the cheese power.” She nodded “Well ghosts are immune to the effects of galactic cheese, so it makes sense, but both my hijas and sobrino certainty are not.” She pointed at Elena, Isabel, and Esteban, who where in the corner. Elena was doing stand up comedy “What do you call a cheese made out of cheese? A cheese!” Then she laughed at her own joke. “Oh Elenita, what has happened to you?” said her concerned mother. Isabel looked up, “Hi mom, I’m testing how much cheese can be put in a sock before it explodes, for science!” she was throwing socks at the cheese. “Isa you’re supposed to use your science powers for good, not this!” she told her, “But I do have to say I am very proud of you for getting that science degree, and you always making such brilliant inventions, and for always being your wonderful self. I love you.” “Thanks mom, that’s always good to hear, I love you too.” Said Isa, as she through a purple argyle sock onto the cheese. Meanwhile, Esteban was gazing at the cheese in awe “Cheese-chan you are so amazing; I feel inspired enough to maybe do a traditional Satu fan dance for you!” he exclaimed. “I’ll help you find them Ex-Chancellor!” exclaimed Higgins, who was also there. Luisa shook Armando’s shoulders “Oh no, Armando, you have to do something before he finds where I hid all his fans!” “Right, this is pretty serious, but I have a plan, but we need one more thing to complete it, and there’s a special sale on at the store for it, vanilla extract!” “Vanilla extract? Are you sure?” she asked. Yes, in ancient times the Maruians gathered together a counsel of their most trusted wizards, and rowdiest citizens, to vote on what would be most likely to safely get rid of space cheese, and Vanilla extract won the vote in an overwhelming majority.” “Then it must be true!” “What are we waiting for? Let’s save the world!” said Marlena.

Sparkly-Clippity-clop Clippity-clop Clippity-clop Clippity-clop (they rode on unicorns to the store and back to the palace, because they are faster then just running there) “It’s time, are you ready, should I go over the lyrics again?” said Armond as he stood in front of the palace. Marlena held her guitar in her hands, “No, you explained them really well on the unicorn ride back here.” “Okay great, are you both ready?” “Guitar!” yelled Francisco, summoning a guitar out of thin air because his guitar servant was on vacation. “He’s ready and I am too.” Said Luisa. “Great, then we start in three, two…” he poured the bottle of vanilla extract on the space cheese to make the song effective. “One…NOW!” “Cheese, cheese, go away on the moon is where you’ll stay.” They all sang, with guitar accompaniment. It began to float upwards. “Cheese, cheese, go away on the moon is where you’ll stay.” They sang ever louder, and it lifted completely off the palace. Even you, the reader, sang it in your head “Cheese, cheese, go away on the moon is where you’ll stay!” It was going, it zoomed off the palace, into the sky, and landed on the moon, where it would live the rest of its days in peace and tranquillity. After that everything at the place returned to normal. “Let’s make cookies for a celebration party!” exclaimed Isabel five minutes later. “How many?” asked Lusia. “More than you can shake a click at-I mean stick at!” she replied. Everyone had a good time at the party, Armando was given a medal of problem solving, but the biggest reward of all for him was the felling on a job well done.

(Author’s note: Raul was not at the palace because he was being the dungeon master at his ghost table-top roleplay group, and cancelling would have been a let down for everyone, but he arrived for the cookie party afterwards.)

#april fools #Armando Gutierrez #Elena of Avalor #my writing

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