#this was a weird lesson to learn in real time but at least i know now

[danothan]

.

#okay but on that note tho i didn’t know that was a trigger for me #like charlie is one of the worst stalker characters from anything ever but he’s also my fav in always sunny #i think it’s just bc i have different ways to mentally prepare for different things #which is why i still click ‘read’ for posts i’ve blacklisted #sometimes a little heads up is all it takes! #yeah idk that rly just took me off guard in the worst way possible bc you don’t expect that in a kid’s show #like ‘clingy gf’ is a common trope and i did know abt it going in #but i think it was just hal’s reactions and the dismissive tone of it that made me switch gears #idk how to explain it was like watching a car crash happen in slow motion (hey i get that now!) #this was a weird lesson to learn in real time but at least i know now #and now i Can mentally prepare moving forward #if i had a nickel for weird trauma lessons directly involving hal i’d have 2 nickels #and boy oh boy i sure do hope it stops at 10¢ #danbles #cw stalking

[mochinomnoms]

Imagine!

Yuu only start getting to know either of the tweels, and taking into account they're not from Twisted Wonderland - they definitely don't know the wonders of merman anatomy. Now, I'm a firm believer that twins have pharyngeal jaws just like their animal counterparts. Just imagine - getting to know each other, talking with either of them, laughing or eating lunch together and Yuu observes something weird in their mouth, like a second pair of teeth that's definitely there, but also in a second is gone? First instinct? (at least mine, dunno how other feel about the possibility) OH MY FUCKING GOD, WHAT'S THAT???? SHOW ME!!!

Now it can go in a few directions, either way Yuu moves r e a l l y close to the eels face. Begs for them to open their mouth for them (hehe), because holy shit I just saw something in there. Of course silly eels are going to to this, no matter the possible boner and a skip in a hearbeat. If Yuu's on the bolder side they can just straight up open it with their bare hands in the first place (or at least delicately guide their jaws to open nice and wide~). I don't know but like, the vision of (innocently of course, what else?) making them go feral, panicky and blushy while taking their time with gently examining the inside of their mouth makes me jsjskskowndhakqkwn.

BRAINROT IS REAL

- 🦭

Ah, the delights of learning your boyfriend's nonhuman anatomy. He's sweating a lil in their seat as you gently pry his mouth farther open to look at his second set of jaws. It's just so cool to you! How different is his anatomy as a human? Does he have other differences from humans, or just the jaws and teeth? What about in his merform, how does it differ when they turn bac—ooh!

He's grabbed your waist, dragged you close so that his thigh is settled between your legs, practically forcing you to straddle him. With a free hand, he's softly grabbed your hand and pushed it away from his mouth. With a red blush, hunger in his eyes, and a smirk, he leaned close to whisper in your ear:

"If you'd like, I can give you fun little lesson moray anatomy~"

Congrats! You're getting fucked!

#mochi asks #twst #twisted wonderland #jade leech #floyd leech #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #jade leech x reader #floyd leech x reader #suggestive #🦭 anon

[nerdpoe]

Prefacing this with I haven't read the comics I just dip in and out like the canon is a pool and I'm trying to climb onto a pool floatie.

So y'all remember that weird fucked up mind game test Bruce pulled on Tim in the beginning of their bullshit? The real fucked up mindgame that made Tim quit being robin for a bit, before coming back and being all "I know I'm not gonna get an apology." And Bruce was all "good."?

What if Tim realized it for what it was.

Tim realizes the test is a test and decides to get back at Bruce in his own game.

Bruce wants to act like he doesn't care about him in an effort to protect himself from grief if another kid ends up dying? That's fine.

Bruce resorting to psychological mind games to drive Tim away from seeking any support??

Not cool.

Tim realizes, and pulls a Hamlet.

He likes Dick, doesn't want the man to go through what Bruce is about to, and goes to Bludhaven to directly tell Dick not to believe ANYTHING Batman says for a month if it relates to Tim, that he's gonna teach the old man a lesson.

Dicks like "uhhhhhhh okay? U know we can just tell him whatever he's done is wrong, right?"

And Tim's just "nah, I'm past that point. See u in like three weeks to a month. This conversation didn't happen."

He leaves a copy of Hamlet in his locker in the bat cave, the only clue he's gonna drop until all is said and done, and gets to work.

Pretends that Bruce's mind fuck has driven him mad, pretends that he's sneaking off to chase down leads, pretends to talk to people that aren't there, visits the joker just to learn how to mimic his laugh, (side bar, joker has no idea why the new robin is visiting him and disabling the cameras, or why the kid just copies what he says and when he laughs, but after like two weeks of it he may be slightly uncomfortable around the kid no lie) uses makeup to make his eye bags look worse and trashes his own house (his parents are gonna be so pissed but he's already angrier than they could ever hope to be, so they can suck it), acts so unhinged Bruce calls it off and tries to tell him the truth, only for Tim to pretend like he doesn't believe him and steal the robin uniform and run away, and then goes and sneaks away from his own house (he knew he was being watched) to a warehouse he predetermined with a conspiracy theory board and string in his room (he needs to make sure Bruce knows where Tim wants him to go) and the conspiracy theory is just an amalgamation of the bullshit Joker spews (again, joker is really confused by this strange child hero and very slightly unsettled, what the fuck Batman where the fuck did u get this robin, maybe return him to the robin store? This one's defunct), makes sure it's abandoned, and blows it to hell with the robin uniform inside

He knows Bruce will be too jarred, to lost in the major trauma buttons Tim is pushing with the warehouse explosion, to do a proper analysis. He KNOWS Bruce will want it done as quickly as possible, and try to bury Tim as quickly as he can. He knows his parents won't get any phone calls for at least a month.

Then he goes to ground for a week.

Walks back into the cave after that week, corners a grieving and broken Bruce, and asks him how he likes mind games now.

After all, it was just a TEST. There was no need to skip basic steps like DNA analysis, that's just SLOPPY Bruce.

Dick, who had been warned by Tim early on and kinda knew the kid was gonna pull a fast one of Bruce, had NO IDEA it was gonna be this depraved, and is very highly Shook. Nor did he realize Bruce had tried a mind game first, and is...disappointed but not surprised, really.

But holy shit Tim Bruce started at a 9 and you escalated to a goddamn 25.

Bruce, realizing that they may both be a bit fucked up, acquiesces to therapy. For all of them. Holy shit for all of them, because that was NOT a normal teenage response and he is beginning to sense some distinctly villainous red flags from this kid.

Next time the joker breaks out he flat out refuses to believe that Tim is a Robin, and joker is the one that starts the whole Cuckoo thing, and asks Batman if he's gonna send the kid to Arkham early or if this is a weird intervention program he's trying.

Then he tries to murder like fifty people cuz he's the motherfucking JOKER.

#Batman #Tim drake #Bruce Wayne #Tim drake is deranged #Tim drake is feral #fanfic prompt #story prompt #this early on Bruce has no idea just HOW feral this kid is #in this au he's about to #maybe I'll write it #actions have consequences au #Jason comes back to pull his bullshit #only for Batman to corner good and just #look man I'm trying really #really hard #to make sure robin doesn't turn supervillain #do NOT fuck this up for me #and Jason's just #really fucking confused #because this is supposed to be his replacement? #then he tries to attack titans tower #and meets feral Tim from his au #and yeah #yeah he can see why Bruce was telling him not to cross the kid

[lucvly]

can you do chris w a latina gf? i need that sm i’ve been asking everywhere 🙏🏻

— chris with a latina girlfriend hcs! ⸰ 𖥔 ͙

warnings: a little suggestive but nothing too crazy ! not proofread oops

a/n: this was so fun to write ☹️

— loooves it when you teach him how to dance. you taught him how to dance bachata because your tía kept making fun of his ass for not knowing how to dance. at first he Sucked but now he out dances you. + dances salsa better than you ever could.

— knows all of bad bunny and karol g’s discography thanks to you. he can name at least five songs from them from the top of his head.

— family gatherings are always such a rollercoaster with him it’s hilarious. you’ll literally be serving food for him and yourself when all the sudden he’s nowhere to be found ??? guess where he’s at... yeah, playing fortnite with your primos.

— has a really hard time remembering everyone’s names at first, especially your tías and primos.

— is such a cutie HELPP loves learning about your culture, he thinks it makes you way more special.

— if you’re fluent, he asks you to help him with a few spanish lessons just so he can communicate with your family a bit better.

— sometimes you call him spanish pet names and he just completely melts. (“mi amor”, “mi vida”, “cielo”) and he’s on his knees worshipping the ground you walk on.

— he gets along surprisingly well with your parents. overall he’s just easygoing so your mom had always loved him. your dad on the other hand... not so much.

— made a somewhat bad first impression on your dad because he was lowkey nervous ???

— after that terrible first impression with your dad, somehow they started getting along so well at the next family gathering though. your dad is calling him mijo atp like ??? those two would sit and watch soccer together, laughing their ass off and actually being excited about the game– (you and your mom are clueless as to when and how they started bonding).

— after that, whenever you visit their parents they’re always asking about chris.

— this one time, you went to visit your parents without chris because he was on tour with his nick and matt. your dad was so confused as to why he didn’t come with you ??? called chris & everything LMFAOO. you had to remind that man who his real child is 🙄🙄.

— he’ll start catching onto your superstitions subconsciously HELPP. you keep telling him to stop walking under flights of stairs or sweeping over people’s feet because it’s bad luck. at first he’s soo confused but he eventually starts telling his brothers to stop doing it as well because he’s terrified it’ll actually be bad luck.

— he definitely eats those 12 grapes with you at midnight after kissing you idgaf !!

— loves trying traditional dishes !! that man is eating all the empanadas and buñuelos at the family gathering idc,,,

— nick keeps teasing him because of how much he’s listening to bad bunny, daddy yankee, maluma and karol g LMFAOOO.

— +++ he tries singing the lyrics with his whole heart but miserably fails duh, you still think it’s cute how passionate he is about it though.

— he definitely had to get used to hugs and cheek kisses as a way of greeting people.

— this mf always ends up playing fortnite or minecraft with your little cousins.

— he knows how important grand gestures are in your culture so he’s going all out for anything and everything. this man will actually always show up with a bouquet of roses at your door and claim it’s your 1.2 year anniversary or something.

— he loves trying the weird food combinations LMAOO, he’s so surprised at how y’all come up with those combinations but always ends up trying them and loving them. (“who even thought of this?” “just try it amor, oh my god.”) ++ big fan of jelly and condensed milk, chicken and honey + hot chocolate and cheese.

— he finds it so amusing how you’re able to communicate in different languages like How ?? that’s too complicated in his mind– he really does find it captivating.

— i just know he’d be so into novelas. unironically sits down and watches la rosa de guadalupe with you. he thinks the plots are actually insane and he gets such a good laugh out of it. he loooves it.

— he has google translate ready for those rare occasions when you argue and you meaninglessly curse him out in spanish. lowkey finds it sexy bye 😣

— when you two start dating he starts to actually understand spanish, he can’t speak it even if his life depended on it but– this means you really can’t talk to your tías about his ass because he’ll understand every word. (he plays dumb though because he loves hearing you talk about how handsome he is and how much you love him bye)

— half of your family genuinely thinks his name is cristóbal ???

— lord save him from watching you dance old reggaeton. that man is drooling. i’m talking guatauba, candy, te imagino, etc !!! he has to take a deep breath and keep it together despite everything that’s going through his head.

#lucvly #chris sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x you #christopher sturniolo #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo x you #sturniolo triplets #matthew sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo

[moistmailman]

Dante: Wait, what do you mean you don’t know anything about Shakespeare?!

Nero: I uh….just dont know anything about the guy is all.

Dante: What?! Didn’t you learn that stuff in school?

Nero: School?! I literally was raise in a city that worshipped your father. Shakespeare wasn’t exactly the city’s priority believe it or not.

Dante:….okay, fair enough but how the hell did the poindexter guy from your city know about Shakespeare? The chicken guy. Nico’s Father?

Nero, shrugging: I don’t know. Guy was a weird. How do you of all people know about Shakespeare anyway. You didn’t go to school either.

Dante: Can’t a man have a hobby or two?

Nero: You actually read classic literature in your spare time?

Dante: Nero, my name is literally Dante.

Nero:……

Dante:….you don’t understand why my name has anything to do with classic literature, do you?

Nero: No.

Dante:…..i gotta teach those damn kids of yours in the orphanage some literature, because they aren’t going to get it out of you.

Vergil: What you two talking about? You’re being loud and irritating.

Dante: Your son doesn’t know anything about Shakespeare or classic literature for the matter.

Vergil: He what?!

Dante: I know right?

Vergil, sighing: This has to be my fault. I was the absent father in this situation. I should’ve taught him.

Nero: What?

Vergil: Does the kids at the orphanage at least know?

Dante: No, that’s why I’m going to teach them.

Vergil: You? No, you’ll need help with drawing up lessons. You were never good with paper work.

Dante: You’re right. I could use help actually. Let’s make a game plan real quick for next week.

Nero: Wait hold up.

Vergil: Lets.

*Dante and Vergil leave*

Nero:……

Kyrie, walking up: What was that about?

Nero: Uh….I guess my father and Dante are going to teach the kids about classic literature.

Kyrie:…..together?

Nero: Yep.

Kyrie: O-oh……they d-do know that the kids aren’t old enough to witness their grandpa Vergil stabbing their uncle Dante in the chest, right? That’s something that can traumatize them.

Nero: From the stories they told me about their childhoods….I doubt it.

#devil may cry #dmc #devil may cry Dante #nero sparda #dante sparta #Dante dmc #devil may cry 5 #kyrie devil may cry #vergil dmc #vergil sparda

[the-s1lly-corner]

Hey! I hope you are better, I waited a while to request this to hope you were better. Take your time writing this, or if you don't feel comfortable that's okay!

I wanted to request a Kinger and Caine x reader in the sense of lovers, whose y/n is deaf

I imagine that maybe they were already deaf before entering the digital world, or it just ended up having a problem when they put on the headset and ended up not hearing anything there. Either way, they would be the embodiment of calm and would speak in sign language

Caine and Kinger x deaf!reader !

yahoo going to write this request then take a break n do the things i gotta do today!! gotta make a coffee cake for someone!

CAINE:

i think i might have said this somewhere before but caine is actually pre programmed to know a bunch of different languages! i dont think it would be too far of a stretch to assume he also knows sign language, or at least enough to communicate with you! if theres anything he doesnt know hes more than willing to sit down with you to learn, plus that just means more bonding!

obviously, caine constantly signs his adorations to you whenever he gets the chance! asides from that there isnt much different than how he would be with a non deaf partner; he still absolutely showers you in love and affection!

should anyone ever be rude to you or say something horrible hes going to be real pissed; fiercely defends you as well as possibly making the next IHA hell for that person.. though thankfully, i dont think anyone in the main cast would go out of their way to be an asshole to you

yes that includes jax, i may write him to be a huge butthole but i dont think he would target you for your deafness, you know?

KINGER:

in contrast to caine, i dont think kinger knows any sign language! so youre going to have to teach him if you guys want to learn to communicate efficiently that works for you; in the mean time while hes mastering sign language you guys may have to speak through writing </3 but trust me thats ditched the second kinger knows enough!

good news, too, kinger is a quick and devoted learner, so hes going to be hooked on your lessons until its over; hell he would let you teach him everything in one sitting if you wanted to!

practices a lot in his pillow fort, probably also practices signing nicknames for you, and i think thats sweet... tries to practice his signs so he can tell you how much he loves you... i think caine would do this too, but kinger holds a timid-ness that i cant quite put down into words, you know?

if theres a library type area in the circus that happens to have a book on sign language you know damn well kinger is going to check it out... alas, i dont think the circus would have such a thing... maybe.. i mean it has a bunch of weird rooms so is it really outside the realm of possibility?

#tadc x reader #the amazing digital circus x reader #digital circus x reader #kinger x reader #caine x reader

[milkywayhou]

You've Got Email (König x OC: Medical Student!Snow) PART III

Summary: When the Colonel from some Private Military Corporation group accidentally send KorTac's secret file via email to a random civilian girl and now they develop some weird relationship.

or

Snow now overthinking about how fucked up her situation can be

TWs: Slow burn (not really), Implies stalking behavior. I just wrote this for fun.

Words Count: 1.9k (The email contain 1.3+ words while the rest was Snow's 4Chan post)

----

From: [email protected]

To: Colonel_Kö[email protected]

05/13/23 at 01:38 am

Subject: A late night conspiracy ramble…

Hey!

Once again it’s a late night and these weary med student brain cells are firing off all kinds of…interesting theories and connections, to say the least.

For example, okay hear me out, but what if Big Pharma is actually run by ancient shape-shifting lizard people from the center of the hollow earth who feed on human adrenal gland fluid harvested during rituals conducted at Bohemian Grove, and they started the pharmaceutical industry just to get us all addicted to medication so we’re docile little cash cows?!

I know, I know, it’s utterly ridiculous…buuuuut it would explain a few things haha! Anyways, somehow my winding thought process led me back to pondering your own doubtless intriguing backstory, oh mysterious Colonel.

You’ve given mysterious snippets here and there, but never a straight history lesson, you sly dog. Care to unravel some of those shadows for this thirsty student? Like how’d you get into this line of work anyway?

Maybe share something to take my mind off lizard people conspiracies before this insomnia kills me. You’ve got me curious now!

Conspiracizing but also bedridden,

Snow

----

From: Colonel_Kö[email protected]

To: [email protected]

05/13/23 at 02:01 am

Subject: RE: A late night conspiracy ramble…

You’ve a vivid imagination, to be sure. As for my own history…it’s nothing so fanciful, I’m afraid.

I grew up isolated, with only books as company. Social skills proved…challenging. The bullying was constant. All I wanted was to disappear into the quiet of nature, far from the incessant noise inside my head.

By 17 I was desperate to escape, and the military offered just that. I dreamed of being a sniper – controlling chaos from afar through calm precision. But my frame and restlessness didn’t suit remaining still for long. They saw potential elsewhere. They assigned as an insertion specialist instead. It was difficult, but taught discipline. In time I learned to turn noise into focus, chaos into strategy.

Now I protect others as I wished to be protected then. It brings…solace, of a kind. Purpose, where once was only turmoil.

Get some rest, Snow. Sweet dreams.

König

----

From: [email protected]

To: Colonel_Kö[email protected]

05/13/23 at 02:14 am

Subject: RE: RE: A late night conspiracy ramble…

I see.

Thank you for sharing that with me. I can’t imagine how difficult those experiences must have been, but I’m grateful you found your calling in spite of them. It takes real strength of character to turn trauma into purpose like that.

Also, I should say the bullying says far more about their weakness of spirit than anything about you. Their loss, as it brought you to where you’re meant to be – helping people in your own way. I can’t help but smile thinking of a tiny bookworm König dreaming of sniping lizards in the woods! Well, you may not be in the trees anymore but it seems your aim is truer than ever.

Thinking on childhoods, mine wasn’t all sunshine either as an awkward kid. Let’s just say blending in was…challenging, to put it lightly. Between moving a lot after my parents split and living with various relatives, school was an escape into study. Seemed the safest route to gain some footing and make the family proud, at least. Kept me busy avoiding the realities outside books for a while too, I suppose. Somehow I suspect lonely bookworm me and you may have gotten along splendidly if our paths crossed back then!

Anyways, not sure where I’m going with this aside from reflecting our younger selves may have found solace in one another, strange as that sounds now in these roles. At least we’ve come into our own in the end, in our own ways. Small favors and all that.

Just a light note before sleep – rest well, König!

Your friend,

Snow

----

From: [email protected]

To: Colonel_Kö[email protected]

05/28/23 at 08:27 pm

Subject: Essay Woes and Cadaver Flashbacks

Ugh,

My apologies for this incoherent word vomit you’re about to endure. I’m approximately 5-7 days into an all-nighter essay crunch and my last two brain cells are DANCING.

This final assignment is killing me dead but at least after it’s over I can finally be done with med school! *insert jubilant celebration emoji* Of course that’s if I don’t starve to death first living off instant ramen. I’m positively wasting away without a decent meal. At this rate they’ll be teaching anatomy lectures using my lifeless body.

Whoever invents a magic food delivery service that beams freshly cooked meals directly to overworked students is getting a freaking Nobel Prize. A girl can dream, right? At this point I’d kill a man for a good pizza. *hideshypotheticalmurderweaponbehindback*

Anyways, in my spiral of delirium my thoughts keep wandering back to that fateful day months ago when I randomly received your classified KorTac email out of nowhere. Still bewildered how you even had my address to begin with…were you watching me, Colonel? *pretends to be frightened but is secretlyflattered*

Getting that file was kinda scary at first, not gonna lie. Reminded me of the first time we received our cadavers – that creepy feeling of being watched even after leaving the lab. Is that what it’s like being you, always paranoid someone has intel on you? :)

Anyways, enough gibbering – just wanted to share my pain and also wonder again how our wacky email friendship began! Stay safe out there in whatever shady places your work takes you. And send help – I mean, good luck with all the classified stuff!

Tired and Hangry,

Snow

----

From: [email protected]

To: Colonel_Kö[email protected]

05/28/23 at 08:40 pm

Subject: WHAT DID YOU DO

KÖNIG I SWEAR TO GOD

I LITERALLY JUST GOT A DELIVERY AT MY DOOR. IT WAS PIZZA AND IT WAS ALREADY PAID FOR

DUDE TELL ME YOU DIDN’T HACK INTO MY LOCATION OR SOME SHIT. HOW DO YOU KNOW WHERE I LIVE??

I’M FREAKING OUT A LITTLE NOT GONNA LIE. I KNOW YOU HAVE ACCESS TO SHADY TECH BUT PLEASE TELL ME YOU DIDN’T TRACK ME DOWN

I was joking in my last email! Sort of! Please say this was all just a coincidence. I don’t need some extra secret stalker on top of everything else ;____;

Explain yourself soldier man!!! My paranoia can only be quelled with answers.

Sending mildly panicked regards,

Snow

----

From: Colonel_Kö[email protected]

To: [email protected]

05/28/23 at 09:12 pm

Subject: RE: WHAT DID YOU DO

Snow,

I assure you, any capabilities related to surveillance are reserved strictly for operations.

As for your delivery, consider it a small kindness from one overworked soul to another. Now eat, regain strength, and get back to that essay. You’ve proven quite resourceful in pulling secrets from shadows. But some mysteries deserve to remain.

Worry not and carry on with your studies.

König

----

From: [email protected]

To: Colonel_Kö[email protected]

05/28/23 at 09:25 pm

Subject: Spill. Everything. Now.

I appreciate the pizza bailout, don’t get me wrong. But my paranoia has now reached DEFCON 1 levels and it WILL NOT stand down until I get some answers. So spill. Just how much do you actually know about me? Do you have my address on file somewhere? Photos? Socials? Pet peeves? Middle name??

I understand need-to-know for operations, but this is need-to-know for my own peace of mind. Please assuage these frazzled med student nerves and assure me you’re not some mysterious stalker Colonel (unless that’s just part of your charm). I’ll even send new Luna's pics in return! Consider it a debriefing – you give, you get. Otherwise the wheels will keep spinning in my head…

Sincerely (and only mildly obsessively),

Snow

----------

>>Anonymous

05/29/23(Mon)22:37:10 No:132926391

Colonel Stalker Dude is freaking me out

Image: [Confused pepe scratching head.jpg 230kb, 400x400]

>Be me, a totally tired out and broke student

>Remember getting those shady files months ago

>Thought Colonel dude was cool and weird pen pal

>Even started to like him after long talks

>But NOW he knows my address???

>WTF how long has he been watching me

>On one hand it’s creepy AF but kinda flattering a high rank dude cares

>Other hand I don't want a secret stalker or to get disappeared

>Free food is nice but feeling stalked is not cash money

>Used to have bit of crush but now I'm skeeved TBH

>What do? Can't go to cops cuz questions. No close friends/fam

>Too broke to move or change info

>Maybe he’s just lonely but also maybe he climbs in my window ;____;

>What if he takes my organs in the night like some human harvester?!

>Only protection is my cat Luna and she's useless in a fight ;_;

>Try to be positive and asking him how much he know

>Currently waiting for his replied while I was writing this post

>Anons pls help, should I keep talking to possible stalker man?

Don’t want my organs harvested but also don’t wanna waste a free food connection

Very conflicted and slightly paranoid this girl is in DIRE need of advice

Anonymous 05/29/23(Mon)22:45:19 No:132926405: >>132926391(OP)#

Sounds like a thriller romance novel lol! He probs just cares in his own intense way. Keep talking but be safe, maybe feel him out more? Could be nnothing ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Anonymous 05/29/23(Mon)23:16:08 No:132926439: >>132926405#

IKR it does sound like a book! But what if it’s a prequel to a snuff film?! I’ll try to subtly find out wtf he knows without pissing him off…

Anonymous 05/29/23(Mon)23:37:12 No:132926502: >>132926391(OP)#

LOL girl chill no one climbin in ur windows. He prolly just admires ur spirit. Keep lines of comms open, set boundaries if needed but relax!

Anonymous 05/29/23(Mon)23:45:01 No:13292623: >>132926502#

You’re right, I do overthink! I’ll calm my farm. Thank u stranger, maybe he’s just a bored soldier man and not a psycho (´。＿。｀)

Anonymous 05/30/23(Tue)00:25:31 No:13292684: >>132926391(OP)#

Change ur info anyway, maybe he won’t go to ur new stuff. And get some locks/alarms jfc. Play it safe.

Anonymous 05/30/23(Tue)00:42:44 No:13292692: >>13292684#

Can’t change anything, I used my student email! And too broke for moves or upgrades, these loans gotta last :’( but self defense is a must, thanks!

Anonymous 05/30/23(Tue)01:28:19 No:132922735: >>132926391(OP)#

Send Luna pics. Also tell col u feel weird, set ground rules like no stalking. Maybe he just wants friendship. Be safe!

Anonymous 05/30/23(Tue)01:46:31 No:132922757: >>132922735#

[sleepy_Luna.jpg 1,3mb 1000x1000] You’re so right, communication is key. I’ll lay it all out clearly and see how it goes. Thx fren <3

Anonymous 05/30/23(Tue)01:59:36 No:132922805: >>132926391(OP)#

Maybe he liiiiikes you ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) whatever happens keep us posted! We’re invested now lol

Anonymous 05/30/23(Tue)02:08:55 No:132922822: >>132922805#

omggg don't say that!! Now I'll be paranoid AND flustered X_X But I definitely will update y'all, this is quite the melodrama unfolding

Anonymous 05/30/23(Tue)02:15:36 No:132922811: >>132926391(OP)#

Girlll tell that stalker if he wants a piece he gonna have to pay your tuition first! Then maybe you’ll reconsider the organ harvesting. Gotta respect your worth sis 💅

Anonymous 05/30/23(Tue)02:23:12 No:132922834: >>132922811#

Omg you genius!!! If he’s really interested he can sponsor my broke ass med student life lol. Alleviate my debt and he gets unlimited Luna pics, win-win!

Anonymous 05/30/23(Tue)03:01:46 No:132922839: >>132926391(OP)#

Lmao girl you been reading too many thrillers! Military guys have ways of finding people, changing email won’t do shit. Just ask him wtf is up like a normal person

Anonymous 05/30/23(Tue)03:39:44 No:132922926: >>132922839#

Ugh you make a good point, confronting is smarter than hiding. But what if he locks me in a dungeon for being nosy?! I have no one to turn to if I disappear ;-;

------

From: Colonel_Kö[email protected]

To: [email protected]

05/30/24 at 03:45am

Subject: RE: Spill. Everything. Now.

Snow,

Let’s just say I know more than you think. But rest assured, your privacy and safety remain my priority here.

As for debriefs, some questions are best left unanswered, even between…friends. Maintaining mystique has its place too, no?

Focus on your studies. I’ll focus on ensuring no more interruptions are needed.

Now get some rest. You’ve an early lab tomorrow if I’m not mistaken.

Sweet dreams.

König

----

From: [email protected]

To: Colonel_Kö[email protected]

05/30/23 at 03:47am

Subject: DUDE.

HOW.

----

This one was short because I've been busy with other stuff hahah. It sure took some twisted turn hmmM? or maybe poor Snow just over reacted ;)

Also love, comment and reblogged are really appreciate! 💖

#könig cod #könig call of duty #könig mw2 #könig x oc #könig #cod oc #cod x oc #konig call of duty #cod fic #cod mw2

[saltygilmores]

THOUGHTS WHILE WATCHING GILMORE GIRLS: S3/EP6: TAKE THE DEVILED EGGS Original Air Date: Nov 5, 2002

Links to all previous episodes can be found in my Pinned Post.

Pre Opening Credits Filler: Lorelai and Rory are sorting junk mail . Of course I had to google whether or not "Shreiber's" was ever a real catalog. Google results were inconclusive. Lorelai's Poconos shirt is really cute.

Post opening credits sequence: A town meeting.

Miss Patty and Babette are too good for this world.

I love seeing Luke smile. As the entire room rises to exit, Taylor instructs them not to leave and everyone immediately listens. I will never understand how he has this much power or why Luke dutifully attends every one of thse things.

Stefon from SNL voice: This hot new club, Stars Hollow Town Meeting, has everything. Animal cruelty, blind obedience, women who pick up dates at funerals, politicians dunking on neurodivergent loners, protest supression.

(tac·i·turn /ˈtasəˌtərn/ adjective (of a person) reserved or uncommunicative in speech; saying little.)

Pretty rich for Lorelai to be dunking on loners when the guy she's in love with has no friends and her daughter has one friend.

At least the loner must be intelligent. Evidenced by the fact that he doesn't waste his time in town meetings. But seriously...imagine you're this guy minding his own business just trying to buy some books and enact political change with protest so the mayor-type-guy calls everyone in town together to dunk on how weird and creepy and quiet you are behind your back (see also: Jess, who was also a child. And who also has to endure shitty comments about not being talkative enough).

Is Kirk the only neurodivergent person in Stars Hollow who is allowed to be himself?

With our powers combined, we are our the Neurodivergent And/Or Deeply Misunderstood Outcast Super Squad! Kirk! A guy who talks to mailboxes! A quiet guy who likes books! Another quiet guy who likes books! Town Troubador! Rory!

Look who else is way too smart to waste his time at a town meeting. His precious whacking off time is over, Luke is heading home, and he is outta here.

Now, let's say the Gilmore Girls in-show timeline lines up with the air dates of the episodes (which it tends to do much of the time). "Teach Me Tonight" aired April 30th, 2002. This episode aired on November 5th, 2002. 6 months and 6 days prior to this town meeting. Rory's not-even-broken arm has healed. Lorelai, kindly...get the fuck over it and shut up. Lorelai: when did Jess get a car? Luke: None of your god damn beeswax. Luke had no idea Jess had a car.

I always found it interesting that Jess was raised in the city his whole life, but knew how to drive. Many (but not all) New Yorkers get around on foot or public transportation and many never even learn to drive at all. But there's just no way Liz was a New Yorker who had a car that Jess could borrow, she wasn't helping him practice, she wasn't paying for lessons with an instructor, and before he arrived in The Hollow the only life he knew was getting around on public transport and walking. We come to learn he knows a bit about car repair as well. And he's only 18. Definitely not saying it's implausible or unbelievable that he knows how to drive. Far from it. Just something to ponder. Jess is scrappy. He finds a way. Lorelai has the absolute fucking audacity to tell Luke "You needs to get a handle on Jess" because he wasn't aware of this car purchase. How about you get a handle on your perfect child before she sleeps with her married ex boyfriend and steals a boat huh. How bout them apples.

OMG OMG.

Narrator: Lorelai Gilmore was in fact, not sorry for equating a 6 month old minor car accident that caused a hairline wrist fracture with 1st degree murder, and she would not butt out now or ever again.

#gilmore girls #denise rewatches gilmore girls #salty is Lorelai Gilmores number one hater #salty rages #gilmore girls season 3 #anti lorelai gilmore #luke danes #miss patty #babette #taylor doose #TDDE #Take The Deviled Eggs #Salty Rages #blood pressure rising

[yeetlegay]

AU where Presumed Straight Boy™️ Porsche is roomies with Presumed Bossy Trust Fund Baby™️ Kinn

This was supposed to be like three sentences and then I got carried away so now it’s like an extremely sloppy not-quite-fic that I should probably just dump in a Google doc and write up properly, but instead I’m presenting it like tumblr is a potluck and I brought a casserole made out of whatever’s in my fridge. 🤲 (Also this is all @iffervescent ’s fault for coming up with the idea for a fic about comphet Porsche doing one of those “straight guy bottoms for the first time” pornos, at which point I lost my mcfucking mind.)

Porsche is having lots of fun, casual hook-ups but lately girls can’t seem to get enough of his ass for some reason. And it’s not that he’s not game to try, he just doesn’t get what the big deal is bc he always assumed anal was overhyped. And anyway some part of him feels weird about having that much focus on him and his body. He likes making girls get off and being useful and his own pleasure is almost secondary to the rush and satisfaction of making someone else feel good.

But this is the third time in a month that a girl’s asked—actually more like begged—to peg him, and he’s a people pleaser, okay? If ass play is such a turn-on for so many girls, he should at least give it a fair shot.

So he does, and…well. It’s sort of a bust. The girl isn’t doing anything wrong, it’s all him. He clenches up tight as a clam as soon as the spotlight is on him, can’t relax or bear down or take deep breaths or anything. He doesn’t even really like getting blowjobs, always too distracted wondering what the girl is getting out of it, feeling bad that he’s letting her do all the work for what seems to him like very little reward.

Ass stuff is all those feelings plus more complicated ones, discomfort and confusion and a faint, twisting sense of shame that he knows is bullshit but can’t quite shake. And nice as the girl is, she’s still a stranger, and it’s still just a hook-up, and patience has a limit. So after it becomes painfully clear Porsche isn’t up for what she’s after, she gives up and lets him fuck her quick and matter-of-fact, and after that night she doesn’t text him again.

Porsche tries not to take it personally or be too bummed by what a tight-ass he apparently is. But one night a few weeks later, he’s snuck maybe one or two more drinks than he should’ve at his bartending shift, and Yok has to call his #RichKidsofInstagram roomie Kinn to come pick him up. Kinn does, huffing bitchily the whole time as he practically carries Porsche from the bar to the car, then from the car to their apartment.

Porsche is a sloppy drunk. He knows this, and really he should’ve learned better by now, but he’s in a funk about his ass now and his filter was never good to begin with. So it’s probably inevitable that he ends up opening his mouth and letting some truly embarrassing shit come out of it. He tells Kinn all about the girls who want to plow him, how he’s happy to let them in theory but in practice he’s been a total disappointment so far. “I wish that thing in porn was real,” he slurs against Kinn’s shoulder as Kinn fumbles for his keys.

“What thing?” Kinn says, with the tone of someone already wishing he hadn’t asked.

“You know,” Porsche says nonsensically. “The thing. Where they have, like, a teacher. The whole oh no he’s an ass virgin, we’ll have to give him lessons.” He pitches his voice a little higher for dramatic effect, but Kinn is unimpressed.

“You watch porn about guys who are ass virgins?” Kinn twists the key in the lock and tugs Porsche inside.

“For educational purposes,” Porsche says, waving the question away with one hand as he stumbles behind Kinn into the living room. “You’re missing the point.”

“Which is?” Kinn shoves lightly at his shoulders, but Porsche’s balance is so pitiful, he keels back onto the couch with a loud oof, landing on one of Kinn’s plush, overpriced throw pillows.

“I want, like, a teacher. To teach me about ass stuff. Oh!” Porsche tries to figure out how to raise his head from the very comfortable pillow, but it’s too hard to do that and talk at the same time, so he picks talking. “Not a teacher. A coach. You know, like they have on that show The Voice. Just somebody helping me with my—I don’t know, routine or whatever. And then I go out and try it with somebody every week.”

“Does that mean you can get voted off?” Kinn’s voice is swimming somewhere overhead. Somebody’s unbuttoning Porsche’s shirt, which is fine because he’s sweating.

“Don’t try being funny,” Porsche warns him. “That’s my job. You buy the throw pillows, I tell the jokes. If you say anything funny, I’ll throw up all over you.”

“I’ll need to buy more throw pillows after this,” Kinn says grimly. “You smell like the inside of a vodka bottle.”

Porsche barely hears him. He’s thinking about that pretty girl from a few weeks ago, how disappointed she must’ve been that he couldn’t give her what she wanted. He feels ridiculous, a little pathetic even. It’s just his ass, for fuck’s sake. It can’t be that hard. Gay guys do it all the time—

“Wait!” Porsche’s eyes snap open. Two blurry, criminally good-looking Kinns sway in front of him. “I need a gay guy,” Porsche announces to him.

“For what exactly?” Kinn scoops his hands under Porsche’s shoulders, lifting him off the couch until he’s sitting up enough to slide the shirt off his arms.

Porsche lets him do all the work, too concentrated on keeping his head up. “Gay guys know lots about anal. I could find one and make him my coach.”

“You know, it’s not just gay guys who do anal,” Kinn says, struggling with one of Porsche’s arms.

“Well, duh.” Porsche tries rolling his eyes, but it immediately makes his stomach roll too, so he stops. “I’m trying to do anal, and I’m not gay. But they’re supposed to be, like, experts, you know? Like the OG connoisseurs of butt stuff through the centuries. If I’m gonna do it, I wanna learn from the masters.”

Kinn finally gets Porsche’s arm free of the uncooperative sleeve. “So you’re just planning on propositioning some random gay guy to be your ass play coach?”

Porsche frowns. “Well, no, I guess not. It’d have to be someone I know. Maybe I won’t freeze up if it’s a friend with me instead of a hook-up.” He groans and drops his head. “But I don’t know any gay guys!”

Kinn’s hands go still, even though Porsche’s remaining sleeve is still caught around his elbow. There’s a long pause. “Porsche,” Kinn says finally, sounding like he’s already regretting what he’s about to say. “You know I’m gay, right?”

The words take a few seconds to register, and when they do they don’t make any sense. Porsche lifts his head, bleary-eyed. “Huh?”

“I’m gay,” Kinn repeats slowly.

Gay. Kinn. Gay Kinn. Kinn gay. Kinn? Gay?

Porsche blinks at him. “I told you not to say anything funny,” he says.

And then he does, in fact, throw up all over him.

***

In Kinn’s defense, he hadn’t actually intended to offer lessons in anal to the idiotic roommate he’s been pining after for six months.

He’s sure Porsche won’t remember much the next morning—not the unpleasant ordeal of cleaning the vomit off both of them, or giving Porsche a strictly clinical sponge bath, or Porsche’s drunken over-sharing about his tight asshole and what a burden it is for him.

By the time he’s gotten Porsche clean and in bed, Kinn is hanging onto sanity by a thread. The only thing that could be worse than remembering the whole night would be Porsche remembering it too.

So of course he does.

And of course he’s nowhere near as embarrassed as Kinn is about the whole thing, aside from apologizing for throwing up on him. He slumps down at the little table in their kitchen the next morning, inhaling a cup of coffee and watching Kinn make an omelette. And within five minutes, he’s steamrolled right over any lingering awkwardness and is asking Kinn to be his “ass coach.”

Kinn says no obviously. That it’s a stupid idea, they’re roommates, Porsche can deal with this on his own—

“But I’ve tried that!” Porsche interjects.

“Tried what?”

“Dealing with it on my own.”

At this, Kinn swallows loudly and keeps his voice carefully neutral. “As in—”

“You know, fingering myself, that sort of stuff.” Porsche downs the last of his coffee. “After the fiasco with that girl, I figured I should practice solo until I was better at it. I thought about getting a few toys to see if that would help but they’re kind of pricey and—”

Kinn is, at this point, having an out-of-body experience. Just the idea, the knowledge, that sometime—anytime—in the past couple of weeks Porsche was in his room trying to work a finger up his own ass, makes Kinn’s brain stutter to a screeching halt. He’s staring unseeing at the kitchen cupboard, picturing it, trying not to picture it, having crisis upon crisis upon crisis in the span of about four seconds. All while Porsche is still talking, telling him about the articles he read and the porn he watched and how really, he thinks maybe he should just walk into a gay bar and throw himself at anyone who looks capable and not murder-y.

Kinn is only human, and very, deeply, stupendously gay, and the hot roommate he’s in love with is offering himself—specifically his ass—on a silver platter to any man who’s willing.

Really, it’s only a matter of time before Kinn gives in and says, numbly, disbelievingly, “Fine. I’ll do it.”

“Do what?” Porsche asks.

“I’ll be your—” Kinn swallows. Looks down at his hopelessly burnt omelette. Looks up at the ceiling, resigned and desperately turned on. “I’ll be your…ass coach.”

And the many, many, many weeks of education begin…

….but I’m not writing full-fledged smut on a tumblr post lol, I have to draw the very shaky line somewhere. I really should just make this a proper fic but I’m already drowning in WIPs so if I do end up fleshing this out into a proper Thing, it’ll be a while.

Anyway, the point is: I am Thinking™️ about Porsche discovering the triumphs and defeats, the epic highs and lows of prostate orgasms.

#tl;dr ​Kinn is Porsche’s Jennifer Hudson #kinnporsche #my fic #<- technically I guess? #ass coach wip

[fansids]

Hi so I saw some your anon asks about lmk s4 and SWK so I am curious about what you think of the special and if I solved anything about not seeing SWK POV and him always the one with mistakes

The special does nothing to remedy any of my issues with the show and especially with season 4. Even though it places the 3 Demon Kings as firmly (mostly firmly?) villains, it's also kind of weird about it.

But my main issue is with SWK and Macaque.

Oh my God. If my biggest issue is how the show treats SWK, and my second biggest issue is the world ending after world ending stakes, then my third biggest problem is Macaque. Or, more importantly, his relationship to SWK and the rest of the cast. Like the more Macaque becomes a good guy the more I hate him. But that's besides the point, let's talk about the show's weird framing around these two to put some context to my problems with the special.

When Macaque is first introduced pretty much everything about him is meant to scream deceitful. From his appearance as looking like SWK, but not (to the point where MK mistakes the two until he gets close), to his very powers which are shadows (which tend to symbolize mystery, deceit, and general evilness) that are also very similar to SWK's powers. His purpose in that episode is gaining MK's trust so he can betray him. Okay, fine first episode, lesson learned.

The second time he's shown is in Shadow Play. The way the story telling is framed (through use of shadows, Macaque tricking the gang into thinking he's someone else, and later forcing MK to fight his shadow-fied friends just to push a message he projects onto MK for the crime of being SWK's apprentice and vaguely similar to him) would say that Macaque was either outright lying or twisting the details about his and SWK's past to put himself in a more favorable light (or more importantly, to put SWK into a less favorable one). MK defeats him, and we're still meant to not trust him. Fine. Cool.

Skipping over S3...

THEN WE GET TO THE SPECIAL. Macaque is not only shown to be completely in the right, but SWK is even worse than what was shown in shadow play. TF. Mind you, the whole point of the scroll was to show SWK's past, AND WE NEVER GET TO SEE IT FROM HIS PERSPECTIVE. It is only through Macaque's telling of the story that we see it, and this time it's framed as being the honest truth. It is SWK's fault for being so power hungry and full of himself that they have their falling out. Bro WHAT??? Mind you, since SWK is literally trapped under a mountain Macaque is also the one who leaves instead of the other way around. WHAT???

Let's put jttw aside entirely. This is just poor storytelling because it makes Macaque as a character not make sense. Why is he the one obsessed with SWK? Why does he want to be shown "the real Sun Wukong" in S1? Why is he upset that Sun Wukong abandoned him? He didn't abandon him. MACAQUE left.

And all of that really really begs the question WHY DID SUN WUKONG KILL HIM??? You can at least infer that if SWK was the one who left, and knowing the violence Macaque is willing to enact on others to get revenge, then Macaque likely did, or tried to do, something to the jttw crew that SWK was not too happy about. But Macaque was the one who chose to leave the relationship, so... what happened??? Why was Macaque even there? Why would he care?

Not to mention, for me at least, it destroyed what was left of my interest in Macaque after S3.

Sorry for the rant, but to answer your question, no, the special does not fix anything about the issue with SWK's lack of pov. It makes it worse.

#lmk critical #monkie kid critical #oooo I'm so mad #like for me Macaque was peak when he was just a villain #I loved him he was awful and lowkey pathetic

[scribe-of-maat]

Ranking DC Pride 2024

8. Phantom Rodeo (Jules Jourdain/Circuit Breaker, Jay Garrick/The Flash)

Dead last because 1 - it's not self-contained. 2 - it has nothing to do with anything Pride related and 3 - it's the return of the complete rando from last time. At least before the incredibly cool couple of Jess/Flash and Andy/Aquawoman featured heavily but no, because of detractor 1 Jay is here instead. Personally, I don't care about Circuit Breaker and I really hope someone else gets their spot next year.

7. "Hello, Spaceboy" (Starman/Mikaal, Komak)

If I knew who either of these characters were, this would probably be a lot higher. But the competition this year is steep so at 8 they go. Komak and the blue-purple warp zone 80s color pallet is REALLY slick. I thought I was familiar-ish with Starman but clearly there are multiple people running around with that name who have nothing to do with the JSA.

6. "Lessons in Astral Projection" (Nia Nal/Dreamer)

I stopped watching the CW shows that weren't about Black Lightning or Batwoman a looong time before Dreamer was intro'd (or after? I know I wasn't watching Flash way before she came along) but I knew of her and thought her powers and connection to the Legion of Superheroes was cool. I didn't like that there was no confrontation with Maeve in the story but it definitely would have gotten in the way of the feel-good affirmation vibe of the story.

5. Spaces

I'm 99% sure I've seen mention of Phil Jimenez across various DC fan spaces, so the only surprises here were that he was LGBT and that they were bringing back the real-person issue-ender like they did Mr. Conroy. It was nice seeing his journey, and it being so well-told is a real plus. No superheroes anywhere in sight though, save Lynda Carter's Wonder Woman.

4. Marasmius (Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy, Janet-from-HR)

Now THIS one was a ride. The opening left me a little rudderless and I'm not the biggest Harlivy fan so I thought I wasn't gonna get much out of this but if there's one thing I can believe, it's that if we had interplanetary travel the 'phobes would preach their nonsense across the galaxy. Ivy being an anti-villain is used to great effect here. No hand-wringing about morals, no reasoning with hate. Just do unto others as they would do unto. VERY cathartic.

3. Bros Down In A-Town (Jon Kent/Superman, Jay Nakamura, Ray Terrill/The Ray, Miguel Barragan/Bunker)

This one 3rd because I relate heavy to feeling weird about being openly LGBT out and about in public. I thought it was a surprising feeling that doesn't get touched on a whole lot because people generally don't like to see that type of real queer struggle being depicted in media that's supposed to be heavy on escapism. This artstyle though. I follow the artist on twitter because it fascinates me how one person's character can bleed through so transparently in the way they draw.

2. The Rivers and the Lakes that You're Used To (Jackson Hyde/Aquaman, Ha'Wea, Orion)

My bias for Jackson Hyde is showing but this story was also incredibly cool on its own merits. Orion being stone-facedly het for half of it was a choice but my boys showed up and officially got together - which I was surprised to learn hadn't happened long before now - so of course it shot up further in the rankings than it otherwise may have. Him saying he feels like himself when he's around his boyfriend is just *chef's kiss*.

1, Steeling Time (Natasha Irons/Steel, Traci Thirteen/Traci 13, John Constantine, Xanthe Zhou)

Natasha and Traci's appearances were the only things about this I got spoiled on, but after reading this they've instantly shot up to join Jackson and Ha'Wea in my pantheon on ships. I do like how it showed the steps to reconciliation and they were both still clearly open to the idea of rekindling things eventually. But this artstyle makes me want to see a webtoon of these two YESTERDAY.

#dc pride #dc pride 2024 #jules jourdain #circuit breaker #pied piper #jay garrick #the flash #flashfam #flash family #starman #star-man #nia nal #dreamer #pamela isley #poison ivy #harlivy #jon kent #superman #superfam #jay nakamura #miguel barragan #ray terrill #jackson hyde #aquaman #aqualad #ha'wea #natasha irons #steel #traci 13 #traci thirteen

[cutiedwaekki]

BADTZ-MARU

— math is the love of my life.

Bangchan x Changbin

summary : Students at SKZ High School found a great way to learn math without the knowledge of their math teacher, Mr. Seo

contain : weight gain ; sort of humiliation; stuffing; a lot ; math ; SFW

A/n : initially this came from a joke (@nana-kom you know 👀) but i hope that you will like it ♡

Honestly you can clearly see how much i love math HAHAHA

.+.(・∀・)ﾟ+.

"Okay class, open your textbook to page 43, and we'll continue with the lesson from last time".

Professor Seo's voice echoed around the room, and he knew how to command the respect of his students, who listened carefully and with great attention.

Admittedly, talking about Neperian logarithms wasn't the most exciting thing, but teacher Seo always knew how to make the class fun and interesting. And let's be honest, the students loved watching him. Sure, he wasn't very tall, to the point where some of his students were taller than him, which hurt his ego, but he was quite imposing with his muscular build, making all the girls who saw him as the ideal man and the boys who wished they had his body squint.

How could a man with such a perfect figure love something as complex as maths? He looked like a jock but talk like a nerd !

Even some teachers wondered. His name Changbin, he aroused the curiosity of many. At just 24 years of age, he had already graduated as a full professor and was proudly teaching at SKZ high school.

Physically, he came across as cold, authoritarian and even frightening. Even the tone of his voice was hoarse. But in reality he was so bubbly, naive, almost innocent.

His former students still had the image in their minds of inviting their teacher to a karaoke party to celebrate their graduation, not expecting him to dance so energetically to popular girlgroup songs.

Changbin was a mystery in itself, a polynomial equation of the second degree;

Difficult to solve when you don't know. Hard to spot if you don't have the eye. Difficult to understand if you're not paying attention.

.+.(・∀・)ﾟ+.

At lunchtime, Changbin greeted the students and left, almost skipping back to the administration office where he was a member in order to put his things on his desk.

—"You're the only one who's this jovial on a Monday" commented Chaeryeong, his colleague and friend, also a teacher but of Korean. "Clearly I don't know how you can expend so much energy and still be energetic" she said with a sigh.

—That's right, it's Monday! Which means that this lunchtime it's yachaejeon for lunch" he exclaimed proudly.

Ah yes, maths aside, Changbin was a real foodie, so every occasion was perfect for eating. He didn't just eat his food, he savored it.

—"Pff, I'm not surprised that you're still single".

Chaeryeong left the advisory board first, followed by a Changbin displeased with her words.

Clearly no one was unaware of Changbin's love of food. If the students wanted to woo him, they'd offer him chocolates so he could write his report and get a better grade.

So if you wanted to woo him ... you just had to appeal to his sweet tooth right?

.+.(・∀・)ﾟ+.

At least that's what Chaeryeong had said, Chan had clearly noted every one of her words in hiq notebook. She had clearly said, "If you want Changbin to be interested in you, you have to either flirt with him with weird math puns or please his stomach."

So Bahng Christopher Chan, a sports teacher, had decided to try everything to attract the attention of Changbin, the popular maths teacher who had melted his heart.

It all started at the beginning of the school year, when Chan was transferred to Korea after a few years as a sports teacher in Australia. Although he had a confident build and appearance, his first day had been very stressful: he knew no one, everyone seemed busy with their own subjects and problems to come and help a teacher whose subject wasn't even seens as essential.

All except Changbin

At lunchtime, he sat down with him in the refectory, smiled broadly and told him "It's always confusing on the first day of school, even as a teacher".

That smile, that ease with socializing, that way of putting him at ease

He'd fallen straight under his spell.

Now you can understand why, on that Monday morning, when Changbin was giving a fascinating lecture on Neperian logarithm to his class, Chan had come up to Chaeryeong and begged her to give him some advice.

He would at least hope it would work, he really wanted Changbin to feel as loved as Chan felt when he came to talk to him.

.(・∀・)ﾟ.+.

—"So what does the triangle say to the circle?"

—"....I don't know but i guess you're going to tell me."

—"You're pointless"

Clearly a normal morning for Changbin, taking a coffee break with Chaeryeong who, although annoyed by his friend's jokes, always paid attention and listened to him, showing how much the brunette meant to her despite her bored expression.

—"I've got one too", said Chan, suddenly intruding on their conversation. Chaeryeong didn't mind, knowing Chan's intention while avoiding Changbin's math joke and laugh.

—"Go ahead, but I warn you, I know all the jokes.

So Chan took a straight, serious look before clearing his throat and speaking, "Are...are you a 45-degree angle? because you're perfect".

Changbin clearly didn't expect this, he was half flattered and half confused as a blush grew on his face. "Nice one... you got me" he said before chuckling, seeming not to understand the meaning behind the joke that was so obviously a pickup line more than a joke.

But before Chan could retort, Changbin moved away, adding that it was time for him to get to class.

—"I told you, he's slow to understand, so if you really want to seduce him, seduce his stomach!" Chaeryeong exclaimed, crossing her arms before walking away towards her desk, leaving Chan and his hand full of maths pick-up lines writtend on his hand.

Maybe she was right

.+.(・∀・)ﾟ.+.

—"Chae' did you put that box on my desk?"

—"Yes, because I've been madly in love with you for years and I only chose to tell you now."

Changbin just chuckled at his friend's sarcastic reply, he was intrigued by the large box in front of him, a sort of basket with a whole heap of goodies, he supposed it must have been a parent who had sent it to him, as a member of the school board and a maths teacher, he was the one whose parents turned to him to help their child find a good school or even get into the best one.

There was a letter, he would just have to know.

The outside of the letter was a pretty pink color, it was so cute, the inside, on the other hand, was empty, no message of thanks, no declaration of love, just a sentence

Are you √2? 'Cause I feel irrational around you!

From : C.B

He closed the letter as quickly as it had been opened and moved away from her, blushing. Clearly he hadn't expected that and this person seemed to know a thing or two about mathematics to concoct a pick-up line for him that honestly seemed to work well.

—"You're so dramatic, just take the sweet and shut up or I'll shove it in your mouth".

Before pissing off his friend, Changbin mumbled a few apologies before sitting down on his desk, unwrapping the wrapping before starting to nibble on some sweets while he worked.

What he didn't suspect was that in the distance a certain sports teacher was staring impatiently in his direction, more than a little proud that his plan had worked, if he kept at it he'd one day be able to confess himself to him and they'd be together forever.

.+.(・∀・)ﾟ.+.

—"You know, you should slow down with the sweets."

—"And throw all that free food? Impossible" Changbin didn't even seem to react to her remark and just finished eating his doughnut, his cheek covered in powdered sugar.

—"Fine , but don't complain because you've put on weight" Chaeryeong sighed, deciding to move on as her worries to his friend went unheard.

After all, gifts from this secret admirer were becoming more and more frequent? In addition to chocolates and candies, Changbin had recently been treated to pastries ranging from muffins to doughnuts. One thing was certain, these foods were always eaten by Changbin, who hated wasting. Nevertheless, all these caloric excesses meant that after several weeks without knowing this mysterious secret admirer, the maths teacher was seriously starting to put on weight.

It was nothing at first, just a swollen abdomen and plumper cheeks. Then his thighs started rubbing together, his ass making every pair of jeans hard to wear. His belly swelled relentlessly, pushing against her shirts where between each button you could see his fat.

With all these changes, you'd think Mr Seo would have decided to go on a diet and exercise more. But he always had a reason to put it off.

"I have to correct test"

"I've got to do subjects for my class".

"I have to prepare a presentation for the administration office ".

Eventually, he became accustomed to this weight, and it even became one of his charms.

At least, the students were sure they could tempt the teachers with a few sweets, but no one was surprised to see him eating such large quantities in the canteen.

And Chan ... let's just say that he discovered that he was madly in love with Changbin, he had fallen even more for his body.

Seeing him eat so happily, rubbing his belly after a meal. Worst of all, once, when they'd both stayed late at school, he walked past the board office and caught him playing with his belly, resting it on the edge of the table and then dropping it back onto his lap.

Since, his deliveries of sweets had become more frequent and in greater quantities. And if at first his pick-up lines on maths were amusing and cute, they were becoming more and more sexual in nature, like :

Baby, I wish you were x2 and I was x3/3 so I could be the area under your curve.

I know my math. And you've got one significant figure

I'd like to be your math tutor for the night: add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and multiply!

I like fractions, do you want to do some with me? I am like a numerator because I like to be on top.

At first he was afraid his words might go too far and scare Changbin, especially when he saw him hurry off, taking all the letters and some cakes and running to the toilet.

Chan was worried he'd gone too far. Luckily, it was during the holidays, so there were no students in sight.

After all, nobody but Chan needed to hear him moaning as he masturbated AND eating in the bathroom...

Changbin seemed to like this secret admirer very much indeed.

But would he still love him if he found out it was Chan?

.(・∀・).+.

—"Don't you think Mr. Seo has put on weight?"

—"Are you kidding, I feel like he's getting fatter each day!"

— "Stop it, that's not nice! Mr. Seo is a good teacher and we shouldn't make fun of him".

—"We're not making fun of him Lily, we're just noticing that the function f(x) of his weight is equal to eⁿ with its limit n when n times to infinity equal to plus infinity"

—"Who are you trying to impress with your formulas?"

- "The positive side is that at least his weight makes us study our courses"

—"Do you really want to do math from the teacher's weight?"

—"I bet you I can create a whole problem"

—"Bet? If you fail, you'll have to do my homework for 3 weeks."

—"Bet"

.+.(・∀・)ﾟ+.

—"Coach Bang there you are! You're in a good mood, aren't you?" commented one of the admins.

—"That's because I've got a date tonight with my crush" he said as he whistled happily, causing various whispers in the room.

—"You have a crush ? Who is she? Is it a teacher from here?"

—"I bet it's Chaeryeong, you always go to the admission office !"

Chan just chuckled and grabbed an apple from one of the fruit baskets before putting down some files. He was about to leave without saying anything, but couldn't resist adding, "I never said it was a woman", creating a huge hubbub in the room as everyone debated the lucky one.

At the same time, Changbin entered the office, handing over some files for next year's re-enrolment of his second-year class.

He smiled innocently as he waddled happily along.

—"Oh, looks like you've got a date tonight too, Mr. Seo" commented Felix, one of the secretaries.

—"How did you guess ?"

—"Mr Bahng dropped by earlier and he was just as euphoric as you."

At these words, Changbin could only blush, his phone began to vibrate, and he quickly deposited his file before claiming an emergency at the admissions office.

-"It's crazy, they're all going to have a date tonight, what a nice coincidence" commented Yerim.

—"What if it's not a coincidence ?"

.+.(・∀・).+.

It was getting late, almost everyone had left. All except Changbin, who stayed late to design his lessons for his students. He always tried to make everything fun and entertaining. Even if he was in charge of several classes, he would create each subject for each student, confronting them with their difficulties so that they could improve, but above all not compare themselves with those who had some facility in maths.

He was a very devoted teacher to his students and to his subject. So much so that he didn't feel a presence enter his office until he came up and hugged him from behind.

—"Channie! What are you doing here so late?"

Chan chuckled before pitting his lips against his lover's. "You promised me you'd be home. But you weren't when I rang the bell, so I assumed you were still there".

Changbin couldn't help blushing, he was ashamed that Chan had waited outside his house to finally come back here. But Chan seemed to notice his concern and ruffled his soft hair before adding, "I bough us something to eat!"

—"Oh, you shouldn't have Channie, I told you next time I was paying" changbin pouted before nudging his lover gently.

—"Get off work early and maybe you'll finally invite me in for dinner" he said with a sneer.

But as Chan brought out the bowls of noodles, he was surprised to count 3. He looked up at Chan, especially when he opened two bowls of noodles towards him, while he was content with just one.

Changbin was certainly naive, but not stupid, and he put his hand on his belly and rubbed it, a sort of habit he'd acquired since his belly rested on his knees.

—"Why do I get two bowls and you don't?"

Chan, who had started to eat, choked, looked up at him shyly and pretexted "it was the offer, two bought one free".

—"More like you're trying to fatten me up!

—"So what? Doesn't it work?"

—"I've had to change clothes sizes three times since the beginning of the year."

—"I'm just trying to keep you healthy", he said, grabbing one of the bowls and feeding it directly to Changbin, who didn't seem really surprised by it. In fact, he was used to it.

—"As a sports coach, wouldn't your aim be to keep me fit? I used to be an musclar".

But chan chuckle, it's true that if Changbin had put on so much weight it was mostly dut to his secret admirer who liked to send him sweets and puck up lines about maths.

—I should, but I love you more than your body. And I like to have something to hold on to, if you know what I mean".

At his words, Changbin coughed lightly and gave him a light tap on the shoulder, while Chan smiled in satisfaction.

—"So you love me like this?"

—"I love every one of your curves Binnie, I could kiss your whole body to prove it"

—"What if... I liked it too? What if I wanted more? Would you like that?"

—"You can do what you like with your body, my love, I'll be there to support you, but if you want to put on weight, I'd be delighted to help you, I love to see you eat well"

Chan underestimated the impact of his words on Changbin; he seemed to be zoning out, but in reality, he was just holding back a groan. The mix of being fed plus being worshipped by Chan was a big turn-on for him, who just continued to eat in silence while Chan fed him, commenting on how handsome he was, how cute his belly was, how his ass drove him crazy.

The evening had begun to unravel when, by the end of the second bowl of noodles, Changbin's shirt was stretched to the limit, his belly showing through the gaps in the shirt as his buttons struggled to stay in place.

As soon as his shirt ripped, the two of them looked at each other, obviously just as excited by it.

—"Do you want to do it here?" Changbin whispered.

—"The closet on the second floor is always empty, there's no surveillance camera.

—"It's ... too far"

—"Don't worry I'll carry you my sweet prince, you'll have nothing to do, just enjoy"

—"Channie I'm too big for you to carry"

But Chan didn't seem worried and complied, carrying the brunette in bridal style. "I'm training to lift weights at the gym for this moment my love"

—"You're such a cliché"

—"But you love me for it"

—"Sure, now please , show me that my body is the nicest arc length you've ever seen."

.(・∀・)ﾟ+.

—"Don't you find that Coach Bahng often goes to the admission office ?"

—"Have you noticed it too?"

—"Yeah, but if it's not for Miss Lee or Miss Park I really don't see why."

—"Don't you know? I hear he likes men!"

—"Really? Then it would be for the interim Yang?"

—"I think so too"

Suddenly, another, deeper voice interrupted their conversation: it was Felix.

—"You know there's also Mr. Seo".

Yet they both looked at him before a face of disgust formed.

—"Not that we don't like Mr Seo, Changbin oppa is so nice and funny, but he doesn't seem the type to please a sports coach, if you know what I mean".

Felix was puzzled; he liked the gossip between secretaries, but here they were clearly belittling a teacher over his physical appearance. Just as he was about to give a speech on the importance of not judging a book by its cover, a group of students rushed in, all looking shocked as if they'd seen a ghost.

—"What's the matter, Ji-Seok?"

—"It's Mr. Bahng and Mr. Seo they're ...."

—"What's going on? Has something bad happened?" Felix asked worriedly, putting his hand on the high school student's shoulder, as if to reassure him. The boy looked so panicked that something serious must have happened!

—"My friends and I were on our way to the music club when we heard a noise in the 2nd floor closet . We wanted to see who it was and... we caught Coach Bahng and Mr. Seo having... you know ".

At this news, all jaws dropped, only Felix smirked slightly and turned to the two secretaries who were talking about Coach Bahng's love life.

—'Not the type to please a coach uh?"

All day long, the rumor of Coach Bahng and maths teacher Seo making out in a closet was spreading fast, and honestly, neither of them had tried to deny it.

.+.(・∀・)ﾟ+.

—"Yes Gaeul?"

—"Mr. Seo is it true you're dating Coach Bahng?"

Changbin couldn't help blushing at this question, which made some students laugh as they felt they'd had their answer

—"Let's talk about the chapter please, then. To determine the directing vector of a straight line given by a Cartesian equation, you need..."

—"What do you like about him?"

—"Who made the first move?"

—"Is it true that you fucked in the establishment?"

–"I hear he's a chubby chaser!"

At exactly that moment, Changbin sighed heavily; he was definitely too close to his class

—"You know what? You clearly don't want to study, and I don't feel like teaching today" he said before taking a seat, looking far too exhausted for someone who'd been standing for 35 minutes. The students at the beginning shouted victory, as if they were going to get answers to their questions.

Unfortunately, they forgot for a moment that Changbin was still a maths teacher who loved his subject a little too much...

–"At the next class, I'll give you a test, and if everyone has more than 95, I'll answer all your questions."

With a satisfied smile, he took a chocolate bar out of his pocket and ate it as he saw all his students suddenly get down to work, as if scalar product had suddenly become the most interesting thing in the world.

Unfortunately, Changbin was a victim of his own success: his students were so passionate that on the next test, they all got more than 95...

If only he knew that it wasn't only Chan who was passionate about his body...

.+.(・∀・)ﾟ+.

Only if what was meant to be a joke between classmates became a real exercise, which at first spread through the class, making a few laugh.

But the exercise began to leak out to other classes.

Surprisingly, you'd think the students would laugh at Professor Seo, but he was far too proud of his body to take this sort of thing the wrong way.

How did the exercise leak out? It was Professor Seo who did it.

He had caught Jin-seok reading a piece of paper in class, and taking it, thinking it was some sweet words he was exchanging with a student, he was surprised when he read the statement.

—"We're trying to determine Professor Seo's weight. Let's consider u0 as the professor's initial weight such that u0 = 65 kg of reason 5.5 and n the number of months such that u(n+1) = u0 + n + 5.5.

Determine when it will be before Professor Seo can no longer walk through the door".

The whole class froze, sure they'd enjoyed doing the exercise, maybe it had gone too far, but they all appreciated and respected Professor Seo.

Clearly they hadn't expected to see him push up his glasses and waddle over to the blackboard, copying out the statement.

—"It's pretty well formulated for high school students , to be honest, but to make it more realistic there are several things to take into account. Moreover, it is not specified whether the sequence is arithmetical or geometrical; we simply assume it by seeing u(n+1). What's more, we don't have any data on the door's circumference, and weight isn't a really determinable criterion of whether someone can pass through a door or not. Instead of looking for when Professor Seo won't be able to get through the door to give you a superb maths lesson, let's look instead for when his chair won't fit any more, bearing in mind that the weight limit is 115 kg. So as soon as (un) is greater than or equal to 115, this superb chair will no longer be suitable for my body. Any questions?"

The class was speechless, amazed at how down to earth their teacher was.

—"You... you're not mad?"

—"Why should I be? I'm very confident in my body, and I don't mind if my weight helps my students work harder. Look, you've all got together to create an exercise based on a joke, you've understood that maths is a funny thing once you understand it, that means I've made you want to learn. Look how much progress you've made this year, clearly if you don't all have your diplomas by the end of the school year I'll be very angry".

The whole class laughed. They were lucky to have a teacher like Mr. Seo. A man who loved maths and shared his love of the subject.

—"Sir, who do you prefer between maths and coach Bahng?"

—"Know your limits".

.+.(・∀・)ﾟ+.

So guys ... when will Professor Seo outgrow his chair ? 👀

#weight gain #my fic #my fics #skz chubby #chubby changbin #chubby kpop

[vitanithepure]

Gale and Mystra

Ok, first thing I wanna talk about, what absolutely lives rent-free in my mind since I finished my first run is how much I love the companion's personal stories. I will for sure make an Origin run with most of them. I want to know every last detail about those pixel people.

With no surprise on nobody's part - I want to talk about Gale first. I believe I once said my OC Vitani and I share exactly one brain cell and it is consumed with thoughts about that wizard.

He did get a bit of a lift up when it comes to the story we knew from EA and it turned out absolutely fabulous. I won't be focusing on our relationship with the man as much as his with Mystra, the goddess of magic. This would be far too long otherwise, there is just too much to say.

Regardless, this will also be a long one, and full of spoilers for his story, so be warned. Placing it all under the cut.

First, some facts. It turns out, from my understanding, that Gale was not after Mystra's godhood, quite contrary to his bio on the website (which I find…weird) but rather tried to ascend by himself. He was impatient; he wanted more, and he wanted it now - and Mystra was not willing to grant his wishes. It goes without saying he was in the wrong, no explanation needed.

So, to convince Mystra to share even more with him, he decided to "screw flowers" and tried to get her what turned out to be that cursed Netherese orb. At least, that is what he thought. We know that this went horribly wrong and Gale was not only stuck with magic he can barely control, but severed from means to stop it - as Mystra, understandably, abandoned him.

Which is also to say how little she actually cares about other mortals, leaving a ticking bomb to run free in the Realms. We could assume that, in her "infinite wisdom" she trusted Gale to do the right thing and just go on and die somewhere remote, like he planned to if he ever started to lose control of the orb. Not really sure what lesson is there to give through such a punishment, that is for Mystra to answer, I don't get it :)

This is when we meet Gale, humbled, but not giving up. I don't want to repeat myself too much as I did a breakdown of his EA content a while back [link here] and not much changed in that regard, his slight rewrite didn't change my opinion on how and why he does and says to us.

So, moving on:

The juicy part truly begins when Elminster shows up and drops the bomb (heh…) about what Mystra expects of Gale… I instantly went with "ok, yeah, here it is, my heartbreak I've been waiting for". And from that point, he seems so…resigned. I can't imagine what a person in his position goes through? Not sure I want to. Can you imagine that? Someone you genuinely looked up to, perhaps even loved, in the past, someone holding infinite power over magic in this world, hell, someone holding power over you asks you to forfeit your life to deserve forgiveness? Damn, D&D gods are stone cold.

Like, I get it, and I try not to excuse Gale. He did a terrible thing, a horrible breach of trust and who knows what kind of person it would make him if he succeeded. As it is, though, it shows such an awful imbalance in power. Mystra was never in any real danger, she proves this by being able to control the orb, decides that this - already humbled and regretful - man has to die to make it okay with her? 

Even though she clearly sees he learned his lesson? And she could remove the orb at literally any time? Because that is what she presents him with if he refuses to just lie down and die for her. She will remove the orb if he brings her Karsus's Crown, along with the netherstones - the thing the Elder Brain possesses.

I don't know what happens if we go along Gale's plan to control the crown himself, possibly nothing good (I am about to find out, I so desperately want to see his whole arc, from every perspective), so here I want to finish off with how it ended for me on my first run - with a complete redemption, both in his and Mystra's eyes. 

Gale recognized his folly and, in hindsight, agreed he had everything a mortal man could ever possess and lost it to his arrogance and ambition. But also him realizing "no love was lost between them" makes me simply happy, he is healed at this point.

From what I gathered, he finishes his story by becoming the Chosen of Mystra once again. Still curious, because how could he not be with his love for magic, but knowing his limits. No longer known as Gale of Waterdeep, but Gale Dekarios, your neighborhood nerdy wizard with a good tale to spin over some wine in the Yawning Portal.

And seriously, fuck the D&D gods with their mortal flaws.

#gale of waterdeep #mystra #bg3 spoilers #bg3 #baldur's gate 3

[grandwretch]

only i must wander, pt. 4

[on ao3] [pt 1] [pt 2] [pt 3]

content warnings: discussions of death, kidnapping, drug use, and cannibalism, internalized homophobia, character considers self-harm

Colors looked different inside the Munson trailer. Steve didn't know if it was the lightbulbs, flickering in the ceiling, or how cramped the living room was, but everything was so warm that it made the world seem yellow. And it was cramped, the furniture pushed out into the middle of the floor to make room for the shelves and shelves of mugs and hats on the walls. It was more cluttered than Steve cared for, haphazard in a way that made his fingers itch-- He kept his room bare of his own volition, needing as much space as possible so he didn't wake up thinking the walls were closing in on him. It would make him claustrophobic to stay here for too long, Steve thought, but it was cozy enough to spend time in. It seemed kinder than his house, for sure. 

And for all its mess, it was obvious that someone worked very hard to keep it clean. Under all the clutter there was no dust or debris. He could see where stains had been before and then scrubbed until they had come clean, the spots dots of lightness amongst the dinge of age. Some parts of the couch and the old, big recliner had been patched up, fresh blocks of fabric and clean, white stitches. 

Steve hesitated in the doorway, taking it all in. It was hard to imagine that they were standing in the lair of two werewolves. He knew they weren't real werewolves, at least not the kind he'd seen in horror movies, with the moons and silver and freaking out once a month. It still seemed weird to imagine one cradling porcelain in his big paws, or curling up on a neat, mended couch. 

Eddie came up behind Steve, shoulder-bumping him out of the way to get into the trailer. Steve moved for him, wordless, but Eddie turned before he had even really cleared the door. 

"Probably not what King Steve is used to, huh?" Eddie said, the kind of nonchalant that echoed so often in highschool hallways, the kind that meant they were itching for a fight. "Sorry about that."

Steve's first impulse was to ask Eddie not to call him that. He'd always hated it, thought it was a pretty stupid nickname for a guy whose life was spiralling out of control, but Billy had made it into something toxic. Billy had wanted it so badly that it warped itself to meet that want. Not a stupid nickname his friends had given him, but a title that meant something-- Something that Steve had never wanted to be. Thankfully, after graduation the name had fallen out of use. Largely, Steve assumed, because outside of school it became extremely apparent that he wasn't the King of much of anything. But here Eddie was, still stuck within those walls, and calling Steve that name that made his skin crawl. 

He couldn't make himself put a stop to it, though-- Mostly because he wasn't sure if Eddie would listen. Eddie had never been a bully, to Steve's knowledge, but he was obviously looking for a fight. Steve hadn't learned much in school, but one of the lessons that had stuck was that an angry man will use any weakness to his advantage; If Eddie knew the name bothered him, it might be his name until the end of time. 

And, if Steve were being honest, Eddie made him a little nervous. Always had. It was something about the eyes, Steve thought, because they were so big and honest and... Well, Steve had always been a little afraid of Eddie seeing too much when he looked at him. Or feeling too much from what he saw there. Maybe both. Maybe Steve couldn't stand the thought of either. It had been enough to make Steve avoid Eddie in high school, and now it left him frozen under Eddie's challenging stare.

"It's, uh-- It's really warm in here," Steve said, wincing at his own words. He honestly had no idea what to say; He'd barely learned to talk to Robin like a normal person, and Eddie seemed like a much harder sell. Just to smooth things over, Steve muttered, "I like it." 

Eddie just looked at him for a moment, eyebrows furrowed, and when the silence grew too long, Steve looked away and shuffled over to the couch, dropping into the seat between Robin and Dustin. Wayne had taken the over-stuffed recliner across from them, and after a moment, Eddie followed him, propping himself against the large back and staring down at the odd group on his couch. It might have been menacing, if Eddie hadn't look so confused. 

"So, Harrington," Wayne said, so abruptly that Steve sat up straighter on reflex. Wayne Munson wasn't anything like his high school coaches, but he commanded the same level of respect. An air of minor authority surrounded him, his jurisdiction small but his control total. " You gonna tell me what the hell you were thinking, coming to a Blutbad's lair in the middle of the night, poking around? With two kids with you, no less." 

As Steve flushed at the gentle reprimand, Robin protested."I'm only, like, a year younger than Steve, you know." 

Wayne didn't seem too swayed by that knowledge, and Steve knew he was content to simply wait for an answer. He didn't look pissed, just concerned, which made Steve squirm under his gaze. There was nothing worse than someone who was just genuinely worried you might be a complete idiot. It would be so easy to tell him all the truth and blame it all on Dustin, but that wouldn't fix the problem. Steve was trying to present himself as an adult, someone who was grown up and put together enough to be out hunting down a kidnapper. Being bullied into stupid shit by a literal child wasn't exactly the best proof of that. 

Steve had never been a great liar, though. His parents had all but demanded it of him, when they still cared enough to be around. Nothing huge, of course, nothing that could be traced back to them, but enough to present their son as a better version of himself. He'd struggled with it for awhile, and then figured out that while he would never be a good liar, he was pretty good at pretending. 

It was startingly easy to pretend to be his father, for instance. That had been an easy one, to start with-- He'd been cataloguing his father's every gesture for years, after all. Watching the movements of his hands and the way he held his head was the only way Steve had ever been able to predict his father's moods. So when it came time to lie, Steve just did what his father obviously wanted him to, and... became him. The way he put his hands in his pockets when he didn't want to say hello to someone beneath him, the way he pouted, gently disapproving, whenever anyone else spoke. His parents adored it; Thought it was a sign of him growing up. Their friends ate it up. 

That little trick of his had gotten him far in school, too. The boys that terrified him were always nicer when he mirrored their own bodies back at them, and whenever that failed, Steve just copied Tommy. It had kept him alive in middle school, and when his growth spurt hit in the summer before high school, it was enough to catapult him into popularity. 

It worked like a charm until everyone realised he was stupid. Then, at least, they called him well-behaved, teachers and his father's coworkers alike, but there was always a trace of pity to it. Like they were looking at an animal, kicked often but too dumb and well-trained to run. Of course, that offered its own benefits, especially with girls. They liked someone they didn't have to worry about hitting on their friends, and their mothers liked that their daughters might marry someone who wouldn't put their own ambitions above their families. 

Steve had never liked it, not his own behavior or the way people responded to it, but it was necessary. 

He doubted Wayne would appreciate it, though. He didn't seem the type to be impressed by Bradley Harrington, much less a cheap imitation of him. Mirroring Wayne was too much of a risk, of course; The man was miles smarter than the dumbass teens of Steve's youth, and if he fucked it up it would come off mocking. Steve could mirror Eddie, easy, because he knew Eddie's mannerisms and they were large and loud and beautiful, but Eddie didn't exactly strike Steve as an effective negotiator. If he was, Steve doubted he would have signed up for a third senior year. 

Who did that leave? Steve considered Hop, but too much of the man's personality was tied up in being a cop. The last thing Steve needed was to be accusatory after getting caught in the man's yard in the middle of the night. It needed to be an adult, though, Steve knew. He needed to be an adult. 

The only other adult Steve knew was Joyce Byers. 

That... could work, Steve thought to himself, watching Wayne's face shift into annoyance. Joyce was motherly and kind, when she wasn't ripping apart the universe to get to her son. People liked her. People liked her a whole lot more than they liked Steve, that was for sure. Plus, she was the kind of person Wayne would like-- Stubborn and passionate, but down to earth. Relatable. And, the best part was, she almost always got her way, no matter how hard to please she was.

So Steve kept his face open and honest, blinked slower. He relaxed his shoulders but kept his body tight, crossing his legs at the ankles. He settled further into the couch, keeping his elbows by his side and his hands in his lap. Steve felt Robin shift nervously next to him, probably wondering what the hell Steve was doing, and without thought Steve reached out to pat her on the leg. Not the possessive, stroking way a boyfriend would, but... chaste and gentle. Maternal. 

Robin made a small noise of surprise as Steve returned his hand to his own lap, but Steve was focused more on the look of disgust that flashed across Eddie's face. 

"I'm sorry for the trouble," Steve said, polite but not overly refined. Plain. Upfront. That was him, now. "We didn't mean anything by it, I promise. We're just in a tough spot, and we were hoping you knew somebody that could help us." 

Wayne shifted in his chair, looking faintly amused. "I'm listening." 

Steve sighed, reaching for the deeper emotions he'd seen written all over Joyce's face. Frazzled and determined. Tired. Make eye contact, widen the eyes. Lean forward and drop the volume. "Something bad is happening to the kids in Indiana right now, Wayne," Steve said. His hands clenched in his lap. "I don't know if you've heard anything, but Robin and Dustin both came to me with stories of kids who have just gone missing. No sign of them. And I know there's always a runaway or two, but this is a lot of kids. Most of them Wesen. And I've been looking into it, and there's... There's evidence that it might be a Blutbad who's doing it. And I--" 

As he spoke, Wayne's face hadn't changed, but Eddie's had. His expression got darker and stormier with every word, and when Steve brought up Blutbader, he nearly exploded. "If you think you can come in here and accuse us of--" 

"No, Eddie," Steve said, soothing. Thinning his voice out a little, to sound a little more worn. Exhausted. "Of course not. You wouldn't-- You've more than proven you wouldn't do that, okay? We may not have ever been friends, but I was paying attention for the past four years, you know. Besides, Robin wouldn't have let me get this far if I hadn't been." 

"The kid was less convinced," Robin said, and Steve could practically feel her pointed smirk.  

"How was I supposed to know!" Dustin protested from the other end of the couch. Steve looped an arm around his shoulders, rubbing squeezing him just a little. He needed the kid to chill out. "I'm not allowed in the high school yet! I've tried!" 

"And what's the reason you think this is a Blutbad?" Wayne asked, with the air of a man who was very used to speaking over a loud child. 

"The lack of a pattern. I know it's not much to go on, but-- Most of these kids have nothing in common," Steve said, laying the case out as best he could. "There's no school that crops up more than the others. They're all different ages. Even the gender is split right down the middle. Whoever-- or whatever -- is doing this doesn't have a type, and from what I understand that would strange with a human culprit." 

"Most other Wesens have strict seasons and grounds for hunting," Robin added. "Some of them even have preferred species. There's none of that, here. It's all just random, like it's going for whatever Wesen kid crosses it's path." 

"With a few human kids in the mix for good measure," Dustin said, and Steve nodded. 

"Unless someone has lost it so hard they've warped their own prey drive, it's hard to imagine that this could be anything other than a Blutbad whose chosen prey is... well." Steve hesitated, not sure how else to put it. "Kids. Does that sound like anything you've heard of before?" 

Wayne shifted in his chair. To someone else, it might have seemed like an old man settling further into his favorite chair, but Steve clocked the stiffness in Wayne's shoulders and the nervous twitch of his fingers. Something had unsettled him. That either meant he hadn't considered it before, or that he hadn't expected anyone to figure it out-- And either was a pretty good result for Steve. 

"Can't say I've heard of that specific type, no," Wayne eventually said, his drawl elongating further with thought. "But... can't rule it out, either. Lots of Blutbads I knew had weird types. No one really talks about them, of course. Isn't polite. But you know how it is." 

Steve didn't really want to think about the intricacies of Blutbader culture right now. "... Right," he said, shaking his head. "So, you can see why we thought it might have been--" 

"So why come here, then?" Wayne said, interrupting Steve's effort at pushing the conversation along. "If you didn't think it was me or Eddie, why come here at all?"

Joyce's shrug was deeper than Steve was used to, almost an anxious twitch, with both shoulders high around his ears. "To be honest with you, sir," Steve said, "I don't know very much about Blutbader. We were hoping you could fill us in on anything that might help. If there's anything you know about any other Blutbader in Indiana, especially." 

"Uh-huh." Wayne's eyebrow stayed high, and it didn't look like it was going to budge anytime soon. "And what's that got to do with you snooping around in my backyard?" 

Oh, fuck it, Steve thought. He was going to have to throw Dustin under the bus, anyway. 

"... Well, Dustin insisted on coming along," Steve said, with a mother's rueful smile. "I didn't expect him to rush back there, either, but, well... Kids, you know?" 

Before Steve could finish the sentence, Dustin had dug his heel full-force into Steve's shin, and he aimed to hurt. Usually, Steve would have just grabbed the little shit in a loose chokehold and shook him around until he begged for mercy (or, more likely, until Steve got bored) but that wouldn't be very Joyce of him. Instead, Steve smacked Dustin's arm with the back of his hand, lightly, like he had seen Joyce do to Hopper when he made jokes she didn't think was funny. 

Before Dustin could escalate things further (and Steve just knew he was raring up for it, too, the bitchy little gleam in Dustin's eyes brighter than ever), Wayne's laughter broke through their quiet squabble. Steve looked up at the Blutbad, a little shocked, and felt that shock grow when he saw the fond, wistful smile on Wayne's face.

"Y'all remind me too much of my little brother. He never knew how to keep out of trouble, either," Wayne said, his voice uncharacteristically gentle. It was a memory, a compliment, and a warning all at once, Steve realized, though it was one he really didn't have context for. He glanced up at Eddie for a clue and all he found was pain, Eddie's face creased with a grimace. 

Steve wanted to help, to smooth out the lines of Eddie's face, but that was a little hard when he knew he was the one causing Eddie to make it in the first place. Looking back at Wayne, Steve forced himself to concentrate, so he could stop ruining the Munson's night and let them live their lives in whatever peace Hawkins could grant them. It was the least he could do. 

Wayne also seemed to sober, though his eyes were still faraway and hazy. He said, "I won't lie to you, son. I heard about the kids. There's been people whispering about it for years now, way back to when that Byers  boy came back. Didn't know it had gotten so bad currently, though. Only thing I've heard recent was... God, must have been gone six months or so, now. There's a man who used'ta work the line with me, most nights. One night he doesn't come in, and everyone's worried because, well, Rick ain't the kind to forget to call in. But then the office girl comes out, near tears, talkin'bout how the cops can't find him, neither. Turns out he'd gone to the store before work to pick up some things for dinner, and when he'd come home she was gone. She was just a little thing, six or seven, I think. Not old enough to run away. Craziest thing was, the doors were still locked. Everything was exactly the way he had left it. The cops couldn't find no trace of anybody in that house but Rick and his wife. The man didn't take it well, apparently. When the cops called us, we knew he didn't do nothing wrong, but... Well, they found him a couple days later, in the woods, still looking for her. Can't say I blame him."

Steve struggled to unstick his tongue from the roof of his dry mouth long enough to ask, "They never found her?" 

"Nah," Wayne said, shaking his head. "I wasn't following the case real close, of course. Felt too weird, knowin' Rick and all. Last I heard, they didn't have much to go on." 

Horror filled Steve's lungs with every heartbeat. Steve was no stranger to his own reaction to the stories of the missing kids, but he had at least hoped that with all he'd read over the past week, he might have built up a tolerance. Apparently, he'd had no such luck. If anything, it was worse now. It wasn't fictional, and it wasn't in the impersonal voice of the crime reporter. It was just a man who'd seen his friend lose the one person he loved most in the world, and Steve's chest ached with it. 

He thought, as always, of Will. And Barb, if he was being honest. Because while he knew what happened to Barb, it never got any easier to imagine what her parents must have felt, not knowing. No matter what Nancy thought, he had never forgotten. He tried, all the time. When the guilt got too big to hold on his own, he tried to limit it to Will, tried to force things back into the size a teenage boy was supposed to handle. But then it only grew, as Steve had to acknowledge he was only abandoning Barb again. 

He tried to reach for Joyce's character, but there's no help there. She would be perfect-- Incredibly compassionate and understanding. She would take Wayne's hand, even, and ask if there was anything she could do. Steve can't do that. Not because he doesn't want to; Wayne looks haunted by something he never even saw, and Steve wishes he could fix that, but he also knows he's not allowed. 

Fixing things was never Steve's role in the story. He never got to be the one who loved or the one who heals for very long. When he was very lucky, he got to be the hero, but most of the time he felt like some impersonal, distant villain. At the very least, some rich asshole who stood at the edge of a grieving community and watched, never really understanding. 

So, instead, Steve froze.

"I... I'm so sorry, Mr. Munson," Robin said, her voice genuine but unsure. "That must have been terrible to go through." 

"You don't gotta apologize to me, girl," Wayne said, gruff. "Wasn't my burden. I'm lucky enough to say that my kid is right here at home, safe as anything." Despite his words, Wayne looked disturbed by his own story, as if he was imagining a world where Robin's apology was a little more apt, and there was no nephew to stand guard behind his chair.

Anticipating his uncle's mood, Eddie said, "I can take care of myself, Wayne." 

Sheer contrariness pulled Wayne out of his melancholy. He shifted back in his chair to stare up at his nephew with a stern frown. "Did I say you couldn't?" 

Steve still wasn't sure what to say, his brain instead latching on to the ease of the dynamic between Eddie and Wayne. Eddie definitely wasn't a kid, but it seemed... sweet, that Wayne still thought of him as one. As his kid. Steve wasn't sure his own parents had thought of him that way in years. Before he could descend too far into self-pity, he felt Dustin tuck himself further in Steve's side. 

Immediately, his attention was on the kid. Although Dustin wouldn't look at him, staring angrily at a burn mark in the carpet, Steve had to assume that it was fear that pushed him into Steve's arms. Fear or grief, one. If it reminded Steve of Barb, then it had to remind Dustin of Will. And Dustin was a child. Just a kid, and none of this was his fault, and if Steve couldn't shake off his own grief and do something about Dustin's, then could he even call himself an adult?

He ran his hand up and down Dustin's back, the way his favorite nanny used to do for him when he got upset, and hoped it helped. There was nothing else he could do right now, besides finding more information about whatever did this. 

"That's exactly why we're here, Mr. Munson. I... I know it's probably a long shot," he confessed, "but I'd like to bring that little girl home, if I can. And if I can't, then... Then I at least want to make sure that no more kids go missing. More than that, we need people to know that their kids are safe again. When parents start to connect the dots, it's going to get bad out there." 

"It's bad enough after what happened to Will and Barb," Dustin said, sullenly, and Steve fought not to flinch at her name said out loud. 

"No more dangerous animal than a scared animal," Wayne said, softly, and Steve couldn't help but tilt his head at the familiarity of the phrase. 

"...My dad says that all the time," Steve said, wondering if it was some Wesen parable that he'd missed. 

Wayne didn't confirm or deny Steve's implication, just smiled wryly and said, "Well, I reckon he would know." 

And then, after a moment where Steve searched for the right words to say, Wayne continued, "You know, you keep poking into this, you're gonna end up facing something a lot more dangerous than some scared parents. Blutbader have been hunting for longer than Grimms have even existed. That's old power, especially for a youngin' like you. You sure you're willing to risk your life for some monsters just because they look like kids?" 

Steve knew he didn't really believe that. Wayne didn't seem the kind to hate himself, no matter what he had done in the past. He seemed level-headed, realistic, in a way that just didn't line up with calling kids monsters. But that didn't mean it didn't piss Steve off. It was Wayne's tone of voice that got Steve more than anything, really. 

There was a voice that adults only used when they were testing you, when they knew the answer and they probably knew what you were going to say, but they wanted you to say it out loud. Steve hated that voice. He hated that every adult in the world thinks he needs to be tested. He hates that they're all so sure that they deserve to test him. He hates that they just can't seem to ask what they're really asking. He hates that they can't believe him when he speaks. 

He hates that everyone on earth seems to think he's either evil or incompetent. 

Steve can feel the woge settle across his face, jerking like a twitching muscle, but he doesn't try to stop it. Adrenaline surges in his blood, but he doesn't feel the usual compulsion to fight and tear and rend. It's easy to keep himself in the chair, and for once Steve doesn't feel out of control. He feels powerful. 

When he speaks, his voice is clear. 

"I know you don't really believe that," Steve said, because it's less confrontational than telling Wayne that he's the reason Steve hates people older than 18, as a general rule. "They're children, not monsters. And even if they were, that doesn't mean they deserve to be hurt." 

Steve's woge forces Wayne's, the same instinctual shift that Steve seems to inspire in Wesen, but unlike with El or Robin, Wayne's Blutbader face was gone just as quickly as it came. And that was... interesting. Steve's eyes narrowed as he took in Wayne's unbothered appearance. It was all odd, wasn't it? They had been looking into each other's eyes the entire time, and Wayne had never so much as flinched away until Steve woged in his face. There was no shock or horror in whatever he found in the shadowy depths of Steve's eyes, and Steve very much doubted that Wayne had less to be guilty about than Robin Buckley. 

Was it all Blutbader who could fight their own instincts so well, or was Wayne Munson special? 

Unable to stop his own curiosity, Steve looked up and deliberately met Eddie's eyes. Eddie didn't woge again, but he met Steve's gaze only for a moment before awkwardly shifting his weight and looking away. Steve supposed that answered his question. It was less of an inherited skill and more of a learned one, though it was obvious that Wayne had taught Eddie a little of it. That was the only reason that Steve could think that the likes of Tommy Hagan and his merry bands of meatheads were still alive after tormenting Eddie and his friends for five years. 

It was impressive, to be sure, but also a little bit worrying, if Steve was honest with himself. The eyes, as far as he understood, were supposed to be a Grimm's last fail-safe. Something to protect himself with, give a raging Wesen pause, when traditional means failed. The fact that some Wesen could just ignore that last line of defense wasn't a great sign for Steve's future odds of survival. 

More than that, if the eyes were supposed to inspire guilt and self-loathing, why were the Munsons so immune to it? The only options Steve could figure were that they were really good at controlling their own feelings, or they just weren't capable of feeling guilt. And Steve would love for the first to be reality, he really would, but the idea of a Wesen in Hawkins with no genuine conscience unsettled him. 

Even as Steve promised himself to keep an eye on these two, he wished he didn't have to. He wished he was allowed to believe the best in people, wished he didn't have to make lists in his head of people most likely to hurt children. Because, when it came down to it, he liked Wayne. A lot. He thought that Wayne would get along with Hopper, probably, if Hopper could accept the way Wayne didn't seem to be moved by much. A dad like him would have been amazing. Steve couldn't imagine Wayne freaking out because of the color of shirt Eddie wanted to wear, or if he wanted to try out for the school play. 

Steve wanted Wayne to be a good person. He really, really did. He just didn't know if he could believe it, yet.

"I have to admit, Mr. Munson," Steve said, settling back into the couch and forcing his muscles to unclench. "You're not what I thought you'd be."

Wayne laughed, though there wasn't much humor to it. "I could say the same thing about you, Harrington. Eddie always told me you were at least gracious enough to keep your teammates from publically humiliating him and his friends, but I figured that would change once you were... aware," he said, and Steve flushed at the idea of Eddie bringing home stories about him. God knew the kind of things Wayne must have heard. "It's a nice surprise to see it hasn't. Guess I should have figured, since you didn't cause problems for Eddie last year." 

"Last year?" Steve asked. Did he even talk to Eddie last year? He didn't think so, but so much of last fall was a blur. He looked up at Eddie, askance. 

"Last autumn, when you-- After you quit basketball, I noticed something was off," Eddie said. He still wouldn't make eye contact, and a light blush was beginning to creep across his face. Steve got it; It was never fun being caught caring more than you should. "Figured it was probably you coming into your Grimm... ness. Sorry if you didn't want anyone to know about it, but I was freaked out and needed to tell Wayne. You never did anything, though. Not even when Billy--" 

"Billy isn't worth it," Steve said, quickly. That was the reason he had given himself, anyway. He meant it, too. Billy was an asshole, and Steve would do anything to keep him away from Lucas, but it wasn't worth living with the guilt of ruining a huma like Steve knew a Grimm could. At least, that was the only explanation he had now for why he couldn't beat one teen boy after taking down several demonic dogs in a junkyard. He hadn't used his bat on Billy, after all, and some part of him hadn't wanted to fight back. 

So maybe Eddie was right. Maybe Steve's powers had started coming in after one too many fights against the demodicks. It certainly made more sense then them coming upon him randomly one spring day. Then again, Eddie didn't know about demogorgons or El or any of it, so to Eddie it must have seemed pretty random, anyway.  

Steve was pretty curious about the logic there. "Wait, why did you think it had to do with my powers?" 

Eddie shrugged, gaze darting all over the room. "You didn't... care about anything. Not, like, in a 'cool' way. You didn't talk to anyone, not even when they were yelling in your face. You quit the basketball team, you were sitting right next to me everytime the principal lectured us about our grades... I mean, fuck, man, I'm pretty sure you didn't even flinch the first time Wheeler and Byers walked into the cafeteria holding hands," Eddie said, and Steve couldn't even remember the day he was talking about. "Whatever happened, it had to be huge, and I figured discovering monsters were real was about as big as it could get. I skipped as much school as possible trying to dodge the oncoming woge." 

It was a surprise to know that Eddie had noticed. Sure, the malaise his life had been consumed by that semester didn't actually have anything to do with being a Grimm-- If he had to guess, Steve would say it was probably the lingering concussion. But Eddie had been looking enough to notice. And that was... That was a lot to think about. Steve was a little dismayed to learn that he'd had Eddie's attention on him all this time and he hadn't had the opportunity to do anything about it. He would have to chalk it up to another thing the Upside Down had taken from him, he supposed.

"So you can see why we were a little suspicious when you showed up tonight," Wayne said. And, yeah, that made sense. They thought he was a full-fledged Grimm, completely in his power for going on a year. That would be enough to scare anyone. 

Clearing things up would make working together in the future, Steve realised, but keeping his own past in mystery would offer him more control. It turned out that adults weren't that different then high schools; They all feared what they didn't know. They worshipped the mysterious, mocked the sincere, and gossiped incessantly. Still, Steve was tired of ruling with fear-- Tired of ruling anything at all. 

"I'll be honest, the whole 'Grimm' thing has been slow going. I only started to woge after graduation," Steve confessed. "I've been getting stronger-- I think you were right, it started last year, but it comes and goes. Everything else is... sporadic, at best." 

"Kinda young for a Grimm," Wayne remarked, which was news to Steve. Not much in the books had been mentioned about other Grimms' awakenings. "Your parents must have been surprised." 

"Yeah, they definitely... Definitely were not expecting it," Steve said, stuttering around the fact that he had no plans to let them know. He can't have them asking too many questions, can't just show the big, blinding weakness in his own chest. "I don't think they planned to tell me until later, I-- I still don't feel very... Grimm. It hasn't really settled in yet, I don't think. My abilities still feel like me, not some magic thing, and I... Sorry, I guess what I'm trying to say is, you have nothing to worry about. I'm barely a Grimm. I've spent the last six months just trying to keep the people I care about safe." 

He doesn't elaborate, hoping they will simply assume he's talking about his parents, or Dustin and Robin beside him. There's not enough time to go into all the details of the things he's had to do in the past two years, and he doesn't trust them enough to mention El, yet. 

It was just a throwaway half-lie, a small justification as to why Steve wasn't trained as a Grimm that didn't go into all the stupid drama his family brought with them, so Steve was surprised to see a frown on Eddie's face. He still wasn't looking at Steve, but to the right of him, his eyes all but boring into Robin's forehead. Steve's mind caught on that, long enough to be embarassing, until he realised what it meant-- What it would always mean, for boys like Steve. 

Because it made sense now, why Eddie had looked so upset when Robin was the one by Steve's side. Why he had immediately tried to start a fight. It was so blindingly obvious, the only kind of signs that Steve had ever been good at reading: Eddie had a crush on Robin. 

The jealousy was swift and unpleasant. Before Steve could even really process the emotion, he could hear himself bemoan how unfair it was, how Steve hadn't even gotten to look at Eddie properly, and how he was already untouchable. And, really, the pettiest part of him complained, what did Robin have that Steve didn't? 

They were ridiculous, unfair thoughts. Steve felt his stomach churn, and he made himself look away from Eddie, his eyes unfocusing in the swirl of colored mugs. It was a bad habit, these little obsessions of his, one that apparently he hadn't kicked as well as he thought. And Steve had thought he'd beaten it. It had been months since he sat up at night, thinking about another man's hands. He'd really thought it was over. 

Part of him wanted to blame Eddie for it, even though his rationality knew it was no one's fault but Steve. There was always a part of Steve that had known Eddie was pretty, always paid a little more attention to him than others, but at the time Steve had been mostly tied up in Tommy. Tommy's hair, Tommy's smile, Tommy's freckles. Whatever Eddie Munson was faded into background noise. Being with Nancy had let him pour all his compuslion into something good, something wholesome, but now he was alone and Eddie was here. Steve couldn't stop the tug in his stomach when he thought about Eddie's eyes. 

The worst part was how selfish it was. People were hurt. Steve had a job to do. It was the worst possible time to be thinking about the plushness of Eddie's mouth, or the way his curls would get frizzy at the temples after gym. The worst possible time to linger over the strength of his hands, or the way his nose wrinkled when he smiled. The worst possible time to focus on trying to see the flash of his tongue when he spoke or-- 

Steve was the most selfish person in the world. It was the only explanation for why he was doing this now, when so much was at stake and he knew Eddie wanted someone else, anyway. It didn't even make sense, really, why he felt so suddenly betrayed. He had been able to put his own emotions to the side when Nancy showed up with Jonathan last fall, because the kids needed all of them focused and ready. So why couldn't he stop thinking of ways to make Eddie look at him when he barely knew the guy?

"So why aren't your parents the ones trying to find these kids, then?" Wayne said, breaking through Steve's panicked thoughts. The pool of guilt in Steve's stomach grew as he flushed, embarassed to have been caught daydreaming about Wayne's nephew in their own living room. 

"Wh-- Like I said, they're out of town," Steve replied, trying to gather the scattered thread of his own lies. "Business trip." 

"Uh-huh. And is that Grimm business?" Wayne asked. A little too curiously, for Steve's taste. Though he supposed he did owe the man whatever information he wanted, at this point. 

"Honestly, sir, my parents aren't really the kind of people who let me in on that sort of thing. They come and they go and business is business," Steve said, trying to sound confident that this was all completely normal and absolutely did not bother him at all. Which, it probably wouldn't if monsters hadn't gotten involved. He was sure there were tons of people who practically raised themselves after age 12. 

"Fair enough," Wayne said, and to his credit he didn't even look disappointed. "If I had to do what your parents do,  I can't say that I'd be letting Eddie get involved." 

It was a sweet sentiment, but Steve doubted that was why his parents kept him in the dark about so much of their lives. He didn't tell Wayne that much, though. It was difficult, though, because Steve was almost sure that Wayne knew more about Steve's parents than Steve himself. It was his best bet towards getting any kind of information, but to get it he'd have to admit that he was going into all this blind. That wasn't exactly a smart play, even if Wayne was completely on the up-and-up. The last thing Steve needed was for people to start talking about how the only Grimm in Hawkins didn't know what the fuck he was doing. 

"Since my parents won't be coming to fix this anytime soon, what can you tell me about Blutbader packs in the area?" Steve asked, trying to steer this mess of an evening back on course. 

"I hate to break it to you, son, but officially there are no Blutbader packs in Indiana," Wayne said with a sigh.  

"I told you!" Robin hissed in Steve's ear. He shoved her away, gently, watching Eddie's face crease with pain. 

Fuck.

"When Eddie and I moved here, I chose Hawkins for a reason," Wayne continued. "Your parents offered me a deal that was hard to refuse, of course, but ultimately it was the lack of a proper pack that made it a good place to raise a wieder cub. Of course, that's probably their doing, too. Most packs don't move through a Grimm's territory without a good reason. Living this close to the city means Eddie can go off with his friends on the weekends without running into something he shouldn't."

"Sorry, I--" Steve paused, unsure where to start in the dozens of questions he suddenly had. "What does wierder mean? And why does it have to be away from packs? Am I allowed to ask that?" 

"Well, let's start simple," Wayne said, and his eyes drifted towards Dustin. "Would you want your little one around a strange Blutbad alone?"  

Steve hesitated, unsure if this was a trick or not. "I... You and Eddie are the only Blutbader I've ever met," he said, every word carefully measured,"so I'm not... I don't want to say for sure, but from what I've read? Not... exactly." 

"And it's the same with me." Wayne shrugged, as if it was a simple fact of life there he was nothing he could do about. "Murderers aren't great with children, even if they are their own." 

"So you left the pack?" Steve confirmed.

"We more than left. We went wieder," Wayne said. Steve frowned when he heard the unfamiliar German.  

When he turned to Robin, she was looking at Wayne as if he had just started babbling like an infant. "I'm guessing that doesn't mean what I think it means," Robin said, as if she was as afraid of upsetting Wayne as Steve was. 

"Nah, wieder is older than that," Wayne said. 

"Older than German?" Robin asked, her voice rising into 'I'm about to freak out' levels of pitch. Her eyes flew to Steve, widening. He shrugged; He didn't know why she thought that he, of all people, would have answers, but he didn't even have context for what they were talking about. God, he really needed to learn German, but the idea of learning a second language when the kids already confused him in English was exhausting.

"Since the creation of monsters, there's been those of us who didn't want to be monsters," Wayne said, as if that explained anything at all. Maybe for Robin, it did, because she began to nod thoughtfully. "For Blutbader, though, leaving is... hard. We're real big on the pack, and stepping away from that goes against everything we are. Can't stay, though, without getting pulled back into the hunt. And even now, every second I'm alive, I can feel myself trying to go back to them." 

"How do you do it?" Dustin asked, voice quiet.

"Don't listen," Wayne said, as if it was the easiest thing in the world. Steve had to assume that it was a very practiced nonchalance, because he couldn't imagine talking about his own compulsions this way. "There's a lot of things I don't do anymore, because it makes the wolf louder than the man. I don't eat meat, I don't wear red, I don't suffer assholes and, most importantly, I don't keep company with other Blutbader anymore."

And that almost made sense, except that Steve was certain he would have noticed Eddie doing literally any of that. One incident especially came to mind, and Steve was quick to say, "I... have definitely seen Eddie eat meat before. In fact, I'm almost positive I once saw him eat an entire chicken in one sitting." 

"I've never hunted before!" Eddie protested, as if he and Wayne had this argument every day. "Eating a chicken isn't going to make me start craving human."

"It's like an alcoholic having a drink versus someone who's never had a drop a day in their life," Wayne explained, and Steve was grateful for an explanation he had literally any chance of understanding. "Sure, the second guy could become an alcholic, but he can also just have a beer on a Friday night. First guy can't go back." 

"So Eddie could--" Steve didn't want to think about it, about Eddie acting like the Blutbad in Otis' journal. 

"He could," Wayne confirmed gravely. 

"I won't!" Eddie said, with the air of a kid who had been promising his father the same thing for his entire life. 

"You won't, but you could," Wayne said, reasonable in a way that came with practice. 

"Oh, my God, Wayne," Eddie hissed, starting to look strained around the eyes. "For the last time, I am not going into a killing frenzy in the mosh pit." 

"Let's hope not," Wayne said, as if that was an actual possibility, and oh my god, Steve didn't need to think about that. Didn't need to think of Eddie in a club at all, especially not in a pit. He'd never seen one, but he'd read about them, violence in a sea of anonymous bodies, an orgy for those who liked to let loose by collecting bruises-- The kind of fun that made Steve's stomach twist in ways he didn't want to examine too closely. The kind of thing he'd never let himself do. 

He just really should not think about it. 

"So why'd you do it?" Dustin asked. His voice was a welcome and necessary distraction to the spiral of Steve's thoughts; Wherever that path led, he'd never let himself go down it sitting next to the kid. 

"What?" Wayne asked, looking a little surprised. 

"If it's so hard," Dustin clarified. "If you have to live the rest of your life struggling, when why leave?" 

Wayne paused, as if he wasn't sure how to explain it. And while Steve was sure the man had thought the same question to himself, maybe the answers he came up with weren't ones he wanted to tell a 13 year old in his living room. Or maybe, he just wasn't sure that Dustin would understand them. (Steve was sure Dustin would, though. Dustin had seen more than he should. Steve wished Dustin understood less.)

Eventually, Wayne said,"When Eddie was born, my brother Al changed. For the better, I mean. He'd always been an asshole, and I don't think having a kid was ever going to change that, but it was like he had woken up one day and his perspective had changed. Suddenly the only thing my brother wanted was to keep his baby safe, even if it meant giving up everything he had ever known. And I... I had never been good at telling Al no." 

All embarassment was gone from Eddie's face, leaving behind instead an uncomfortable sadness. Steve was all too familiar with that pinched frown. To him, it was always from a grief that he didn't know how to hold, a sorrow that fit just a little too big within the spaces of his chest to have a proper place in his life. It required more than his two hands to hold it, and Steve wished he could be that second pair of hands for Eddie. He wished he knew how to hold someone else's pain like that; He wished he'd ever had someone to teach him. 

"We stayed on the move for a few years," Wayne continued. "Came up the East Coast and then headed West when--  Well, stumbling onto Hawkins was almost an accident. I didn't think we'd get to stay until your parents found me and offered the deal." 

It was easy to imagine what the deal might be. Steve knew his parents, knew the kind of deals they liked to make in a board room, and he didn't imagine they saw their town as any different. Still, he wanted to know the details, the particulars. He needed to know exactly how big the knife his parents were holding over Hawkins was.

"Wait a minute," Dustin said, before Steve could ask further. "If Eddie is wieder and he's never hunted before, then my mom has to let me join Hellfire this year! This is perfect!" 

Steve blinked, stunned by the sudden change in subject, then said, "Dustin, there is absolutely no way you can tell your mom about any of this. She would kill me, and probably Wayne, too." 

"Come on, Steve, if the other all join--" 

"There are others?" Eddie said. He actually sounded excited by the idea of the Party joining his silly little club, damn him. Steve hated that it was almost adorable. 

"Yeah! My friends Mike, Lucas, and Will all play together," Dustin said, babbling with excitement and innocence like Steve hadn't seen him in God knew how long. "And maybe Max and El, if her dad lets her come to school this year--" 

"Dustin!" Steve snapped. The Munsons had pretty much been cleared of any and all suspicion at this point, but that didn't mean he trusted them with El. Even good people talked to the wrong suits, sometimes. 

"I mean, we already have some prey species guys in the club," Eddie said, eager enough to ignore Steve's outburst.  "Maybe I can have their moms talk to your mom, let her know what the vibe is like. We haven't had any problems before. Are your friends--" 

"They're human. Well, except for El, she's--" 

"Henderson, if you say one more fucking word," Steve swore. 

"She's basically Steve's little sister," Dustin continued, as if Steve hadn't said a single word. 

"Jesus fucking Christ." 

They both continued around him, as if Steve wasn't having a very public breakdown at Eddie Munson knowing about El's existence. Neither of them even looked his way as he buried his head in his hands and surpressed the urge to scream. Dustin beamed up at Eddie, asking, "So what campaigns did you guys play last year?" 

"Well, we just finished the latest Dragonlance campaign, and let me tell you, those aerial battles--" 

"These children are ridiculous," Robin said, close enough that it broke over the excited racket of Dustin and Eddie's nerdery.  She wasn't wrong; Steve had long since accepted that the kids would always bring their board game up in the face of extreme danger, but he hadn't expected that Eddie would indulge that particular absurdity. Steve was beginning to think that maybe he just had bad taste.

Steve raised his head to look at Wayne apologetically, but he found the man was instead making the same expression back at him. "He'll talk about this for hours, if we let him." 

"Dustin, too," Steve said with a tired nod, and it was in that moment of kinship that Steve had to acknowledge this entire thing was a waste. Eddie and Wayne obviously hadn't done this, they had already known that before Dustin let his emotions get the best of him, but more and more it was becoming obvious that they didn't know anything. They were just normal people who had to work a little harder to get to 'normal', just like Steve and El and Dustin and every other Wesen living on the fringe of what it meant to be human. Whatever clues existed in greater Wesen society were once again entirely out of Steve's reach, and they were no closer than they had been this afternoon. 

Steve let his shoulders slump in resignation. "Maybe we should just let them talk," Steve said. "I don't know what to do now, honestly." 

"It's a damn shame your parents aren't here for all this, kid," Wayne said, eyes sad. Steve hated being pitied, usually, but just for once he let himself revel in it. This was much bigger than he could handle, and it felt a little soothing to have it acknowledged for once.  "They'll get to the bottom of it,eventually. You just gotta wait it out." 

"You have a lot of faith in them," Steve said, curious. He couldn't imagine what they had done to earn it, when he had so little faith in them himself. 

"I mean, not everyone is under their protection, but whatever's out there would have to be awfully stupid to keep messing around where a Grimm can see it," Wayne said, and that, at least, made sense. "Look, son, I know you're under a lot of pressure right now, but this'll all be over once your parents are home." 

It was a sentiment that Steve had heard many times, over the course of his childhood. When he was younger, it felt like he wasn't even allowed to ask questions without someone telling him to just wait for his parents to come home. He tried to tell them that he was sick of waiting, that he was never sure when they were coming back, but that only made everyone upset. So he would call, and someone's secretary would write a note, and Steve would wait. As he got older, Steve stopped calling. Eventually, people let him ask questions-- It was okay when a sixteen year old asked how to pay a power bill, in a way it hadn't been when he was eleven. 

It helped that Steve was good at pretending. He learned to shave in Tommy's bathroom, pretending he'd been doing it for years. He copied signatures and permission slips. No one ever doubted when Steve said he'd called them, because who else spoke like Bradley Harrington? Who else but the son who survived mimicking his tone of voice? Steve pretended he was still waiting, and he didn't feel bad about moving on. 

Wayne made him wish he was still waiting. Not because he actually wanted them to come home-- In fact, the idea of it made him feel the same way he had felt when Nancy had wanted to go to the cops. His stomach squirmed with unease, palms sweating, because his parents were the only people he had never been able to pretend in front of. And if they knew too much about Barb-- if they knew too much about Dustin and El and Robin --then they would know exactly who Steve was. 

But Wayne made Steve want to be the kind of person who didn't feel like that. Or, at least, the kind of person who could ignore it long enough to call. He already knew he should, already knew all the lives he was putting at risk because he was too afraid to pick up a phone, but until that night Steve was okay with his own cowardice. Wayne made him feel guilt for pretending, for the first time in his life. 

Steve wasn't sure if he liked that. 

"Of course," Steve said, still pretending, with a pit in his stomach. "Of course you're right. I'm sure they'll be home as soon as they're able. But is there, uh, anything else you can think of? Just to keep the fort held down until my parents come home." 

"Nothin' off the top of my head, son," Wayne said. "But I'll tell you what: I'll keep my eyes open and my ears peeled, and I'll let you know if anything comes up." 

"Thank you, sir." Steve stood, yanking Dustin out of his conversation. The kid scrambled to follow his lead, still Steve's shadow when he had found a cooler friend, and he felt Robin match his every movement just a moment behind. Steve hesitated for a moment, unsure if it was necessary to leave his number or address with a man who so obviously knew his father. Or even if he would be home when Wayne needed him. He was shit at this leadership stuff. "If-- if there's an emergency, and you can't get in touch with me, you can always call Chief Hopper down at the police station. He knows where to find me in a pinch." 

"Wait wait wait." Eddie sounded harried, and he looked at Steve with wide eyes. "Does Chief Hopper know about this shit?"

"I mean... he knows kids are missing," Steve said, because... well, he had to assume that someone had told the Chief of Police that kids were going missing more often than quarters, "but I haven't told him about the Wesen connection, no."

"But he knows about Wesen?" Eddie asked, and Steve noted that he certainly wasn't afraid to make eye contact now. His eyes all but bored into Steve, big and scared and wholly prey. If he hadn't known better, there was no way Steve would have pegged this man for any kind of predator. Even human seemed a designation too cruel for those eyes.  "He knows there are people in this town who aren't human? Does he-- does he know about me?" 

"No, no, it's not like that," Steve said, because he remembered how scared he was to tell Hopper about being a Grimm, before he even had words for it. He couldn't imagine what it must be like for Eddie, with all this... expectation at his back. "Hopper knows that Wesen exist, but that's... recent. And I doubt he knows anything about either of you; I don't think he's even heard of a Blutbad before. Hop knows the basics, and I don't think he plans on learning much more than that." 

Wayne hummed, considering. He seemed much calmer about the idea of a cop in Wesen business. Although, considering all the weed Steve and his friends had bought from Eddie in school, Wayne probably spent less time in general thinking about cops. "Seems like he'd be a good ally, Chief of Police. You don't want to bring him in on the missing kids?" 

Oh, and wasn't that a doozy? Because Wayne was right, from a certain point of view. It would be so much easier to let Hopper take over. But there were so many reasons he couldn't, and so many of them he couldn't tell Wayne. There was just... too much. Too much about Hopper, too much about Steve, and while he fully believed Wayne was a good person... Well, there were a lot of good people Steve didn't trust. 

"Look, Hop is a good man," Steve said, slowly. "But he's a cop first, and that comes with rules and laws and a bunch of other stuff that I don't really understand. Now, Hop isn't always... the best at following those rules, but that's not a position I want to put him in. If there's every anything in this that we can prove to a court of law, then I would love to call the police and step out of the way. But that's just... not the life we're living." 

Besides, pulling Hop in on any Wesen business would be a terrible idea. Once he had one foot in, he was bound to take a mile, and the more he got involved, the bigger chance he had getting tied up in something that Steve's parents would notice. And them noticing Hopper was just a step away from them noticing El, and that was... Steve couldn't have that. 

Wayne was right, though. Steve needed someone to work the human side of things if he wanted any chance of finding this guy. Hopper couldn't get involved, and Steve didn't trust Dr. Owens or the numbers he'd left behind last fall, but... Well, Steve knew a guy. The local paper might not have as many resources as the police department, but people also didn't close the doors on a pretty smile like they did a badge. 

Luckily, Wayne didn't ask him to elaborate. He just sat for a moment, as if he was really considering what Steve had said-- And wasn't that a trip? --and eventually, he nodded and sighed. "... Jim Hopper is a good man," Wayne said, in the voice of a man who was making a choice he hoped he wouldn't regret. "I don't mind calling him first if there's anything I don't think I can handle without someone getting hurt." 

That was certainly a choice of words. 

"I- I'll be right behind him, if you need me," Steve said, trying not to let his voice shake under the sudden image of mild-mannered Wayne Munson wrecking someone's shit. 

"I don't doubt that, son," Wayne said with a smile. 

Steve, unaccustomed to approval this easily, fidgeted under the light of Wayne's grin. "... Right. Right, well, I-- I guess we better get out of your way. It's past Robin's curfew." 

"Oh." Robin practically inflated with shock like a cartoon character, rising up on her tiptoes as she looked at her watch. "Oh, shit. Yeah. Thanks for all the help, Mr. Munson. Bye Eddie!" 

"Yeah, bye Eddie!" Dustin chimed in. "Make sure you talk to your friends about my mom! Her name is Claudia Henderson, we live on--" 

Steve cut him off with a gentle shove towards the door. They didn't have time. Eddie would figure it out, or he wouldn't. Steve needed to get out of here before a Munson decided to make him rethink another aspect of his life. "Dustin, get in the car. Thank you for everything, Mr. Munson." He at least tried to make that sound genuine. 

"No problem, kid," was Wayne's gentle response. "Good luck." 

They left the trailer in a flurry of noise, Dustin and Robin both bursting into their frenzied monologues as soon as the door closed behind them. Stumbling down the steps, Steve almost tripped over both of them as they stuck close to his sides, and he rolled his eyes when Robin came tripping over his heels. 

She grabbed his sweater to steady herself, still complaing over Dustin's excited ramblings. "I can't believe we stayed out this late, Steve. Do you remember how early we have to get up to open, now? In the summer! This is ridiculous, I'm too young for this kind of--" 

Their voices made such a confusing cacophany that Steve almost didn't hear the creak of a screen door behind them, so by the time he turned to check, Eddie was already halfway down the steps. 

"Harrington! Hey, Harrington, wait up!" Eddie called, as if Steve hadn't already stopped in his tracks at the sight of him. Backlit by the faded porch light, Eddie looked otherworldly, a kind of magic that Steve hadn't believed in since his parents decided he was old enough to stop believing in God. Steve felt his mouth going dry already, just looking at golden swirls of errant curls around his head. 

"Oh, uh... Can you guys wait for me in the car? It'll just be a few minutes." 

Dustin would have argued if it weren't so late-- The kid liked to pretend that he was just as ready to pull an all-nighter hunting monsters as he had been two years ago, but Steve recognized the deep-seated teenage urge to sleep for twelve hours a day, and it was hitting Dustin hard. He only looked upset for two seconds before turning away, a yawn already curling his mouth. He didn't even bother to speak, waving at Eddie over his shoulder as he continued trudging to the car. 

Robin shrugged and followed. "Don't make me late for curfew, Harrington, or I'll make you meet my dad." 

Steve shuddered. He hated meeting dads, especially ones whose daughter he wasn't dating-- Mostly because they were always so sure he was. "No chance of that, Buckley." 

He heard Eddie mumble under his breath, a little, "gross," that had Steve frowning off into the swiftly darkening weeds. 

It was such a bad idea for him to talk to Eddie alone; Steve was more than aware that his obsessions got worse the more time he dwelt on them. He knew he would be replaying whatever Eddie said to him over and over again as he tried to sleep, reading into every word deeply enough to give a little rationale to the delusion. It wasn't something Steve could afford to do, especially not when he also had to deal with Eddie's obvious distaste for him, but the alternative seemed even worse.

 Whatever Eddie wanted to talk about, it was obviously i mportant-- And private enough that he hadn't wanted to talk about it in front of Wayne. Dustin would be too nosy, trying to take over the conversation, and Steve honestly didn't have the brainpower to corral him right now. Plus, Steve doubted that Eddie wanted his crush to hear whatever he was about to say. More than that, Steve needed to not actively be resenting Robin over some stupid boy she probably didn't even like. 

God, he hated even thinking that. 

"What's up, Munson?" Steve said. If he talked to Eddie like one of his old teammates, he could pull off sounding normal. Maybe. Probably. 

Eddie hesitated for a moment, his eyebrows knitting together as if he was gearing up for something big. "If you're going to be out there looking for those kids, then I want to be there with you. Join you, I mean. On your mission." 

"Um, no. Absolutely not." Steve didn't even have to think about it. 

"Listen, I know we aren't exactly friends, but--" 

"What? No, that's not--" Steve rubbed at his nose, trying to find the right words. He had always been awful at explaining himself. For a long time, it had been hard for him to understand that not everyone thought in the same pathways as him. Even now, when he finally understood the weird looks that people gave him when he spoke, he never seemed to pick the right words to make people understand. That was why Nancy had always been mad at him-- He could never make her understand what he was actually trying to say. It seemed important, now, to make sure Eddie didn't walk away from this with the same irritation. 

"Look, Eddie," Steve said, starting over. "I need to keep this hunt lowkey, alright? As little people as involved as possible, for my own sanity if not for your own safety. I already have to look after Robin and Dustin because they refuse to let this go at all, and I really don't think that I can manage looking after a third Wesen kid while hunting for someone who is actively trying to capture Wesen children. If you go out there with me, there's no guarantee you're coming back, and I'm not repaying Wayne for his kindness by getting his nephew killed." 

All of Steve's efforts had apparently failed, because the apprehension on Eddie's face had already melted into a pissy little frown. "I'm older than you, Harrington, and I can take care of myself," Eddie said, and Steve had to hold himself back from laughing. As if age had ever had anything to do with it. As if Steve hadn't seen the tiniest twelve year old girl throw men like Eddie to their deaths. 

Luckily, Steve didn't have to reach that deeply to push back. He had four years of memories that were more than enough to keep Eddie Munson far away from any battle field. "Oh yeah? The bloodless, wieder Blutbad is going to fight the monster off himself?" Steve asked. "Eddie, I had to physically drag Tommy Hagan away from kicking your ass multiple times, and that kid was made of pipe cleaners and marshmallow fluff. I don't think you can handle a real fight. ... No offense." Even he didn't believe his own weak appeal at civility. 

"Oh, what, and you can? You got your ass beat by Jonathan Byers, man. We all heard the rumors," Eddie hissed, and Steve could have recognized the wounded masculinity a mile away. 

He rolled his eyes, a hand on his hip. "I do just fine when my opponent isn't a teenage boy with a mother waiting for him to come home, turns out," Steve said, thinking about the way bone collapsed so easily under the weight of his bat. Yeah, he did okay. 

Eddie looked away, flushing. It wasn't the first time that night, and it probably wouldn't be the last. Steve couldn't blame him; While Eddie had obviously learned a lot about self control from his uncle, whatever he saw in Steve's woged eyes must have been enough to seriously throw him off. Even El and Robin, who'd had the most violent reactions, had mostly gotten over it. Eddie, though, looked at Steve like he might start foaming at the mouth and biting at any moment. 

Which was a little ironic, considering, but Steve wasn't about to point that out. 

Making Eddie uncomfortable had never been on Steve's to-do list, so he decided to simply avoid eye contact from here on out. Honestly, it was a little relieving, because Steve hated eye contact with strangers he wasn't trying to flirt something out of. But it was a little upsetting that Eddie didn't want to look at him. And now he didn't have an excuse to look at Eddie's eyes. 

Whatever, this would probably be good for him. They could just stop making eye contact, and Steve could finally put this stupid crush to bed. 

Fuck, no, Harrington. Don't call it a crush. 

Still looking away, Eddie deflated, and Steve noticed he was just a hair shorter than Steve himself. "Alright, fine," Eddie said,  "I'm not going to be any help in a fight. But I know way more about Wesen society than either of those kids you've got with you--" 

"Oh, come on," Steve said, a little irritated by Eddie playing dumb, "you literally know Robin--" 

"And you need the help, Harrington. Don't pretend you don't." In that, at least, Eddie's voice was firm. Confident. Too bad for him that Steve had always been better at faking it. 

"No, I don't need another tag-along nerd," Steve said, pulling for a little of that tried and true Hagan disdain. He just needed Eddie to give this up, go back inside, and pretend none of this ever ended up on his doorstep. "I have books and shit for that, okay? My parents didn't leave me totally unarmed; We'll be fine--" 

"If you didn't need the help, then why did you show up here asking questions then, huh?" Eddie asked, and, well-- It was a good question. One that Steve knew he wouldn't exactly be able to explain his way out of, considering he was lost in the woods on most of this. 

Steve decided to stop arguing he didn't need help, and just start arguing that he didn't need help from Eddie. Something in him smarted at actively trying to hurt the man's feelings, but it would be better for them both, in the long run. "Because the 14 year old would have shown up alone, if I hadn't, and while I know you couldn't fight your way out of a wet paper bag, I wasn't so sure about Wayne," Steve said.

"Look, Harrington, just-- I have actual connections in Wesen society. Not one or two friends, but a whole network of people in Indiana who know more about themselves than any Grimm that ever lived," Eddie said, and Steve had to wonder how many families on the list Eddie could find a friend of a friend to talk to. How deep these connections really went. Would a Jagerbar family be more willing to talk to a Blutbad who showed up on their doorstep? "If you're going to be actually investigating this, you're going to need someone who can get you answers from people like that. Not the books your parents left you." 

"Why? Why can't you just stay safe?" And Steve was talking to Eddie, sure, but meant everyone. No one in Hawkins was willing to get themselves to a safe place and just stay there. They all had to be heroes, and it was driving Steve insane trying to keep them all alive. Why did Eddie have to be stricken with the same affliction? Why did it have to be every fucking time? 

"I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something happened," Eddie said, an answer that Steve had already known. It was the same reason he had even agreed to come here, the same reason he had stepped between monsters and the people he cared about every time. It was the same reason that Nancy had walked away from him to find answers, and the same reason Dustin put his stupid neck on the line every single day-- Because they had to. They didn't have any other choice. Steve just wished it could be someone else, for once. 

 "I know I wasn't always the best at it," Eddie continued, his big, sad eyes shining in the moonlight, "but I have done everything I can to try and clean up the messes you couldn't. If there was a bully stupid enough to piss you off, I made sure they came after me, not after the other guys. Because... Because I couldn't handle it happening to someone who couldn't take it, and I knew I could. And I can take whatever this monster's got to throw at me. But those kids...." 

If there was one thing Steve could not stand, it was to see himself in someone else. He could barely stand to look at Dustin, sometimes, especially when he was angry and lecturing his friends. More and more the kid was picking up Steve's sarcasm. But in Eddie it was worse, because it was the only part of himself that Steve even liked. It pissed him off, on Eddie, made him want to take the guy by the shoulders and shake some self-preservation into him. But Steve's hands were tied. He knew it would make him the worst kind of asshole if he brushed Eddie off, and the worst of it was he couldn't even pretend that he wasn't here for the exact same reasons. There was no talking Eddie out of this, and if he was anything like Steve, he'd probably just show up if Steve told him no. 

 "Fine. Fine! I'll keep you in the loop," Steve said, as angry about capitulating as he had been with Dustin earlier. He knew he needed to get better at saying no, but he would rather people do stupid shit with him around to pull them out of it, and he was beginning to suspect that everyone knew it. He rubbed a hand over his face, trying to plan a way to keep Eddie safe and far enough away from Steve that he wouldn't be too distracting. Or, worse, actually helpful. The last thing Steve needed was another competent monster hunter to embarass himself in front of. "I-- Ugh. I need to make some calls, get some info on the human side of things so we can start trying to figure out how this guy is finding these kids. Me and Robin have Monday off, so we can meet up that afternoon and go over what I found. Fair warning, the answer might be 'absolutely nothing'." 

Eddie brightened, a grin spreading across his face so quickly that Steve was beginning to suspect he had been played. "Sounds good. Who are you calling, though? Is Hop feeding you information? Is that why we knows?" 

"Uh, no." Steve really did not want to tell Eddie that his big, important source was his ex-girlfriend. For a multitude of reasons, most of which Steve didn't want to think about for too long. "I actually-- Well. I know some guys in the government." Because true lies were the best kind of all. 

"Wait, what?"

And, yeah, there was no way Steve was going to give more detail after all the hints Dustin had dropped in the trailer. Look, I'll see you Monday, Eddie, but I really have to go before Robin kills me. Bye," he said, turning on his heel quickly before Eddie could get a word in. 

He heard a confused goodbye mumbled behind him, but Steve kept his head down as he marched to the car. Thoughts swam in Steve's brain at a pace that had his pulse pounding in his temples. Everything, from what little Wayne had told them, to Eddie's crush on Robin, to the reemergence of Steve's worst habits, to Dustin's new obsession with getting into Eddie's club, was a jumbled mess in the front of his mind. And he knew it was stupid and selfish, the way everything suddenly seemed equally important, but Steve had never been very good at compartmentalizing. He dealt with what was in front of him; Always had. 

The problem with that was everything had turned up on his plate at once, and Steve only had so many hands. And mouths. And brains. 

It didn't help that he could already hear Robin and Dustin's voices before he even made it to the Forest Hills sign, much less to the Bimmer. He had no idea what they were arguing about, their voices muffled just enough that Steve couldn't make out any distinct words, but they were obviously arguing about something-- No matter how good Steve's hearing had gotten, it hadn't turned him into Superman yet. There was no overhearing quiet conversations in buildings down the street. They were yelling, and loudly. 

Steve snatched open the driver's side door, already glaring and bitching before he even got a foot in the vehicle. "Literally what is wrong with the two of you?" 

Dustin had put up with Steve's scoldings for too long to take them seriously, and he tried to continue the arguement, not even looking Steve's way. "Would it kill you to admit that I'm right for once--" 

Robin, however, had centered all her attention on Steve the moment the door opened. She watched him with narrowed eyes, now, ignoring Dustin's shrill voice behind her. There was a moment of silence as Steve settled into his seat, but the moment he shut the door, Robin asked, "What happened?" 

Resisting the urge to bash his head against the steering wheel for the next half hour or so, Steve stared down at his hands for a moment. He wasn't even sure what she was asking him, as he doubted that Robin would care that Steve and Eddie had just stood outside and had a little bitch fit about who got to be the bigger hero. He thought she'd probably just roll her eyes and call them both stupid boys, honestly. Or maybe not. Maybe Robin did like Eddie back. Maybe Steve was already in the way again, and it would be better just to let them handle it, let Eddie take the spot that Robin and Dustin had dragged Steve into anyway-- 

"Nothing," Steve said, shaking the threads of anxiety from his head and starting the engine. "Eddie just wanted to ask if he could come the next time we do research. I told him it was cool." 

"Oh, good," Robin said. She didn't look too excited about the news, which was a great sign for him vis a vis getting his heart broken mid-monster hunt again. "It'll be nice to have an extra pair of eyes looking for clues. We need all the help we can get." 

"Yeah," Steve said. The car idled underneath them as Steve fiddled with the air conditioner. He knew he should start driving now if they wanted Robin to make it home on time, but his brain was still spinning. He just needed to breathe for a second. Just a fucking second. "I'm not used to being on the mystery side of things. I usually just show up and swing at whatever seems like the thing most likely to kill someone." 

"And he didn't know what a Grimm was," Robin muttered under her breath. 

"Hey, you have me!" Dustin protested. "I know I'm not as good as Nancy, and I don't have any weird old guys with government documents in his basement or anything, but I figure stuff out all the time!" 

"I know, and I'm gonna call Nance--" Steve paused, then twisted around in his seat to face Dustin in the back. "... Do you think we should be looping Murray in on this Wesen thing?" 

"Who's Murray?" Robin asked. 

"Are you crazy, Steve?" Dustin's voice rose an entire octave. "That racist asshole? Fuck no. He'd probably try to put El in a cage or something. And then we'd have to kill him, and Nancy would be, like, so mad at us. "

That was fair. Steve had never liked Murray, anyway. Despite the fact that he was apparently 'instrumental' to getting justice for Barb, Murray hadn't really seemed to care either way. While Nancy had been in it for the truth, and helping innocent victims, Murray had been mostly focused on being right. In the maybe thirty minutes he'd spoken to the man last Christmas, Murray had spent the entire time forcing uncomfortable eye contact and telling Steve all about his incredibly troubling theories. The more upsetting they were, the more excited he seemed about the whole thing. Steve really didn't want to see how excited he got about more missing kids.

Besides, while Steve trusted that Murray knew better than to cross Hopper by coming for El, Steve absolutely did not believe for a second that Murray wouldn't out every single Wesen involved if it could be used as 'proof'. He was addicted to being right. God, Steve really hoped he could get that impulse out of Dustin before it got too late. 

 "You're probably right," Steve said, and turned back around, putting the car into reverse. 

"Who the fuck is Murray!?" 

They did not make it home in time for Robin's curfew. 

Luckily, Robin's mother had been delighted to meet him, and though Robin complained under her breath the entire time about her mom getting the wrong idea, Steve had been happy to play along if it meant Robin didn't get grounded. Mrs. Buckley had all but begged Steve to stay and have dessert, and Steve was oddly touched-- The woman was obviously terrified of a Grimm in her kitchen, never looking him in the eyes for longer than a moment or two, but her offer sounded genuine and warm. He would have said yes, if Dustin hadn't been in the car. It would have been nice to know another Wesen family. 

It was only after he'd dropped Dustin off that Steve remembered why he really shouldn't accept food from the Buckleys. 

The next day before work, Steve called Nancy Wheeler for the first time in months. They'd talked since they'd broken up; Of course they had. With Dustin and Mike as close as they were, it was practically impossible for them not to run into each other now and again, and it wasn't like they hated each other, now. Phone calls were more intimate than a casual conversation, though. It spoke of more intent, to just call someone up and chat for hours, and while Steve was all for trying to be friends, eventually, he hadn't wanted Nancy to fill pressured by him calling her out of nowhere-- He hadn't wanted to put Jonathan in that position, either, though he figured his own feelings had never crossed Jonathan's mind. 

He owed it to the guy, he figured, for being such a dick. 

He figured neither of them would mind in an emergency, though-- They were all nearly adults now, and experienced monster hunters. They could have this conversation without bringing their history into it. Even as he justified it to himself, Steve hoped that it wasn't Ted or Karen who would answer the phone. Ted hated him and Karen had always liked him a little too much; The last thing Steve needed was another set of parents assuming that Steve was chasing after their daughter. 

He could just see Mrs. Buckley and Karen Wheeler glaring at each other during a PTA meeting, fighting over a boy that both their daughters felt nothing but disgust for. It would be funny for about two seconds, until it absolutely tanked Steve's barely recovered reputation.

In Steve's ear, the ringing stopped, and Steve straightened from his slump over his kitchen counter just enough to brace himself. 

"Wheeler Residence, Nancy speaking."

Steve sighed in relief. "Uh, hey, Nance. It's me. ... Steve," he said awkwardly. He hated talking to people on the phone. Without facial cues, he was basically lost in conversations; Most girls were easy because they only wanted to flirt, but for everything else, Steve could barely understand what people were trying to say, much less what they were thinking. He decided to barge through the stilted small talk and get right to the point. It wasn't like Nancy's opinion of him could get any lower. "Look, do you have time to help me with a problem?" 

There was silence on the other side of the phone, leaving Steve squirming for a few moments before Nancy said, "Is this about the shirt you lost? The red one?" There was something tense in Nancy's voice, something that Steve couldn't place, but had to assume was anger or  suspicion or both. 

"What?" Steve said, before he could even think about it. For a moment, Steve had thought she was actually asking about a shirt, and it tripped him up. It was only after he registered the tension in her voice that he realized this was probably some kind of code or implication he just didn't understand. He had no idea what a red shirt meant, or why Steve would have been the one to lose it, but it didn't take a genius to figure out it probably had something to do with the Upside Down. "Oh! No, no, but it is about a mutual friend of ours. The one we met at Chief Hopper's?" 

There was another pause, and when Nancy's voice returned, it was unsure. "But it's... not about the red shirt?" 

"No, it's--" Steve sighed. He hated talking in code, hated that he couldn't just say what he meant and ask Nancy to stop talking to him like she was afraid he might actually explode from stupidity. It was so stupid; She was the one who had wanted to go to the cops to begin with, and now she and everyone else was so afraid to even breathe the wrong way. And Steve got it; He really did. Keeping El safe was the first priority, but what was the point of never talking about anything else? They all knew about the Upside Down and the labs. The government knew they knew.  And it wasn't like the American government didn't know that Wesen existed; They'd had little Wesen girls in labs to do experiments on. They should have fucking guessed one of them would figure it out, eventually. They should have been the ones to stop the kids from going missing, the ones to stop monsters so his parents didn't have to. If they wanted to get involved now, good for them. Steve would happily hand it over. For now, though, he was sick of pretending like he cared. If they were even listening. "Look, Nancy, do you honestly think you've been bugged?" 

"Steve!" Nancy hissed, sharp and angry. Months ago, when they had been together, it would have immediately made him step back and apologize. Now, though, it just made the foreign strength that Steve had begun to think of as his rage prickle across the back of his neck. 

"I'm serious, Nance. This is serious," he repeated, because she didn't often believe he knew the importance of things. Steve didn't take it personally; She did that to most people. He just didn't have the patience for the conversation it would take to convince her. "There's no time to be playing spy games or whatever." 

"The government is serious, Steve," Nancy said, as if Steve hadn't been there. "I don't know why--" 

"The government can go fuck itself, starting with Reagan. And if anyone is listening, they can tell him I said that, too. Whatever, they probably know about all this shit anyway-- And if they don't, oh fucking well," Steve said.

Nancy made a little noise of shock, one that reminded Steve of his mother. All suburban sensibilities. It was a practiced sound, one that Nancy had obviously donned out of some kind of camoflague or simply habit, but it made Steve roll his eyes all the same. 

"Steve, what has--" she began, but Steve wasn't interested in playing their assigned roles right now. 

"El wasn't the only one of her kind," he interrupted. Immediately, Nancy's voice failed. Good, he thought. He could practically feel her investigative instincts firing up through the phone line. Hopefully now they could dispense with the masquerade of normalcy. 

"We knew that, already," she said, eventually. "Her siblings--" 

"No, I mean... El would have had powers even if she'd never been taken to the lab," Steve huffed. He wasn't explaining this very well. It would be easier, he thought, if he could just tell her about himself. That would be proof enough for anyone, especially with his Woge backing it up. However, he wasn't sure if he wanted Nancy to know-- It was hard enough to admit his own lack of humanity to people who understood, like Robin or Eddie. It was entirely another to admit to a human. Hopper had been a necessary evil, because he needed someone to put him down if something went wrong, but what good would telling Nancy do? It would only confirm what she already knew; Steve had never been a real person in the first place. 

"There's whole races of them, Nancy," he continued, trying to keep it all as vague as possible. "They're called Wesen, and they-- They're not as powerful as El, usually, but they're not human. They're more than that. And that's why the lab wanted El so badly. That's why the lab wanted all those kids so badly. Because there's not that many of them, but there's-- There's more than we thought, Nancy. So much more."

Nancy's voice was faint. "... What?"

"I know it doesn't make sense," Steve admitted. He had already known it was going to be hard to sell Nancy on a fairy tale without proof, but without outing himself or Dustin, his hands were tied. "I know that, Nance, but I've met them. Kids and adults both, I've met them and I've seen them 'change' like she does. Ask Hopper, if you don't believe me. It's real. It's all real. And-- and they're in trouble."

"Steve, how do you know this?" Nancy asked, and this time Steve had no problem identifying the emotion in her words. It was doubt, plain and simple, and Steve tried not to think of all the hurtful reasons it was there. 

"They--" Steve paused. He really should have come up with a lie before this, but he had honestly thought having Hopper on his side would have been enough to sway her. Maybe he should have known better. "They came to me because they saw me hanging around with El. She's been trying to find more out about her parents, so..."

"Really? That's it? They just saw you hanging out with El and thought, oh, he looks like the person to talk to about this?" If Steve wasn't mistaken, there was a thread of laughter in Nancy's voice. As if it was so laughable that anyone would choose Steve to be their hero. And that was fair, maybe, because Steve hadn't been chosen by anything other than genetics, but it didn't change that he was the only one that could fix things. And Steve needed her with him on that, whether she believed in him or not. 

"Look, it doesn't matter why they chose me," Steve said, already sick of trying to justify himself.  "The point is, kids are going missing. Tons of them. Like, dozens per year. Not just little kids, either, but people your age. And I think I might be able to stop the guy doing this, but I need your help."

"And you're sure it's not..." Nancy's voice trailed off, unwilling to say it out loud. Steve wasn't sure if she was worried about the bugs again, or if she thought that saying it out loud would bring it back into their lives. Either way, the unsaid name hung between them like a physical wall until Steve swallowed his guilt down. This was different, and it was something he could still stop. They didn't have the time. 

"Yes, Nance. This is just... plain human evil," Steve said. "Well, not human. But you get what I mean." 

"I still don't understand how you got caught up in this," Nancy said.  

"It doesn't matter at this point, Nance. I don't--" Steve huffed, rolling his eyes. "Look, if this is going to be a problem, I can go to someone else." 

"No!" Nancy's protest was quick, the idea of being taken completely off the case apparently much more terrifying than a few unanswered questions. "No, I want to help. What do you need?" 

"So, I've got the Wesen-- that's what they're called, Wesen, it means--" 

"People in German, yes," Nancy, as if that was common knowledge. Steve had no idea when everyone in Hawkins learned German, or why he had been missing from class that day, but whatever. That made this whole thing easier. 

"... Yes, so, I've got that angle covered. I've got some-- some connections in the community, I guess," Steve said. He felt much less protective over Eddie and Robin's status than he did Dustin's, especially considering that they weren't so involved in Nancy's life already. Still, he didn't like the idea of her knowing. Sure, she wasn't as involved in their lives, but they were all going to the same school, and from the sound of it, they were already having a rough enough time there. He hoped she didn't dig. "But I'm having a little trouble getting information on the human side of things. You know, where this guy might be finding the kids, if they hang out in any of the same places, you know? So I was wondering if you had any sources at the paper that might--" 

"I don't work at the paper anymore, Steve," Nancy said, voice clear as Steve's ramblings tumbled to a hault around it.  

"What?" 

"I said I don't--" 

"No, I heard you, just..." Steve stopped, taking in a breath. She had been so excited for that internship. It had been all she talked about, in the few times they had spoken recently. She and Jonathan both had been so thrilled to start the first steps of a life they could build together. Steve had been ruthlessly jealous, but hearing the flat, monotone cadence of her voice now only filled him with sudden alarm. "God, Nance, are you okay?" 

"It's fine," Nancy said, and they had dated long enough for Steve to know that those words were almost always a lie. It might have been a little hypocritical for him to think, but Steve had long since accepted that a Wheeler would always complain when they were happy and smile when they were miserable. Even little Holly whined about being uncomfortable when she fell asleep against Steve's shoulder. 

"No, come on, you can talk to me. Did something happen?" Maybe it was the months of feeling like the entire world was on his shoulders, but Steve felt the unfamiliar urge to fix everything. He was aware enough of his own behavior to know that in the past he had ignored every problem in Nancy's life and hoped for the best, but that obviously hadn't worked. There had to be something he could do, to fix this for her and Jonathan. "If-- If something happened, I can help. I can call my mom, you know, my parents donate a lot to the paper, and if I call her--" 

"Steve, I can take care of myself!" Steve thought, absurdly, of Eddie. How he so badly needed to be cared for, how Wayne wanted desperately to do it for him, and how Eddie chafed and squirmed under the gentle hand of his uncle's worry. The same protestations had fallen from his lips just the night before, but when Wayne had pushed, Eddie had seemed exasperated but... fond? Maybe he and Nancy would get there, one day, maybe she would let him be her friend--

"No, I know you can," Steve said, trying to sound as responsible as possible. "I just--" 

"You're not my boyfriend anymore!" 

The explosion of Nancy's anger, now so obvious, drew Steve up short. He had never forgotten that Nancy had dumped him. He thought of it every time he saw her, how badly she had hurt him. Was he acting like he had forgotten? He hadn't meant to. If anything, Steve had gone out of his way to give Nancy and Jonathan space, to make sure they both knew that he had accepted his loss. Steve couldn't tell how he had overstepped, but it was obvious he had. Nancy wasn't someone who would just bring it up out of nowhere. Steve had messed up, somewhere. 

But all he had done was care about her. Was that it? Was that what he had done wrong? Steve hadn't thought so; He'd cared the same way about Carol and Nicole and his former female friends, and their boyfriends had never seemed threatened outside of some light teasing about the unstoppable charisma of Steve Harrington. So maybe it was just Nancy. Maybe it was just with her that he wasn't allowed to care. Or maybe it was a Steve problem. Maybe it was only him who wasn't allowed to be her friend. 

"Okay?" Steve said. He rubbed at his nose as he coughed, trying to rid the quaver from his throat. "Okay, I, uh... I'm sorry, Nancy. I didn't mean to overstep. I'm... I'm sorry I bothered you, too. I'll find somebody else." 

"No, Steve, I--" Nancy sighed, and Steve recognized the emotion behind that one all too well. He had fucked up again, somehow. She was sighing like his mother did when Steve didn't pick something up quickly enough, like teachers did when he asked stupid questions. Steve flinched away from the phone, even as Nancy said, "I can help without the paper. I want to help." 

"Great! That's-- That's great," Steve said, hoping it was true. "Um, hold on, I have a list of names. Do you have a pen and paper?" 

Slowly, Steve read off the list of names and towns, occassionally stopping to fill Nancy in on small details like parents' names or schools. Because the victims were kids, there was a depressingly small amount of information they had found. In fact, most of what they had was a list of everyone who had a drug addict as a parent, which was interesting, but he wasn't sure how to explain everything to Nancy without her freaking out. Besides, if they were connected through the Buckleys, there was no way Robin and Steve wouldn't find the connection eventually. He just needed Nancy to check out the small, human things. Things Steve had never been good at. 

"Anything you can find would be... I mean, I've already checked, you know?" Steve said, nervously. "But I'm not half the researcher you are, and it would make me feel better to have you checking my work. There's no telling what I missed." 

"Right. Well, I'll start working on this immediately. It's not like I've got anything else to do," Nancy said, bitterly. 

Steve made a small noise of agreement that he hoped wasn't too offensive. Usually, he would have stayed on the phone for just a hair too long, taking advantage of the situation to find out how Nancy was doing, what she and Jon were up too. Sometimes, he asked about the kids, and Nancy would explain whatever game they had been playing in a way that actually made sense for Steve. He liked those conversations; They made him feel like he was finally making progress on the 'friends' thing. After Nancy's outburst, though, Steve had to wonder if Nancy had ever enjoyed them at all, or if she just assumed it was Steve's last, desperate attempt to win her back. 

He tried to think of the politest way to hang up, so he could go to work and try to forget any of this ever happened. Robin would be a great distraction for his brain, her rambling going to a good cause for once, and maybe one of the kids would come in. Maybe he could pick up dinner on the way to Hopper's, maybe Max would be there, too, and Steve could spend some time talking to people who actually wanted him around. Maybe-- 

"Steve, can I..." Nancy hesitated. She sounded almost shy, in a way she hadn't around Steve since they first started dating. "Why didn't you go to Hopper with this?" 

When Wayne had asked Steve that question, he had to bite his tongue somewhat. Steve had been raised in a family with a lot of secrets, although he had no idea how many at the time. And family secrets stayed inside the family at all costs. There were a lot of things Steve wouldn't say to someone on the outside, and even more he simply wouldn't. Things that Wayne wouldn't understand. 

Nancy was different. Nancy had been here for all of it, every second, and she was deeper into the inner circle than Steve himself. More than that, Nancy was keenly aware just how badly adults had kept failing children in Hawkins. She would understand why Steve couldn't just hand it all over and pretend it wasn't happening. He almost wanted to point out that, at one point, she hadn't either, but-- Well. Although Steve still stung with betrayal, at the moment Nancy sounded more curious than accusatory. There was no point in picking a fight. 

"I love Hop, you know that. Mostly, I just want to keep him completely out of this. I wouldn't be able to take it if this put him or El in harm's way. But also, I..." Steve sighed. "It's hard to agree with the way Hop does things sometimes. You know what I mean. You've seen the way he can get with El." 

"He's been through a lot, Steve," Nancy said, softly. 

"Believe me, I get that," Steve said, because Hopper had told him a little after a few too many beers. About Sarah and the way El had torn that hole in his chest right back open. Steve honestly understood; That didn't mean he had to like it. Especially not when, bizarrely, it was pointed in his direction. "And he's been trying to be better about it all. But I can't have him trying to Papa Bear me right now, and if we find those kids, I really can't predict what he's going to do. I need... I need someone I can trust to do things the right way, even if that person isn't me. But Hop's a complete mystery, and I can never tell if he's going to be a hardass or a loose canon. I can't afford that right now." 

"But you trust me?" Nancy said,

"Of course I do. Nance, come on." Steve's voice dropped into softness, almost a whisper. He felt terrible, talking about how much he liked her after everything. Felt guilty and ashamed and sneaky and gross. But he couldn't have Nancy thinking that he didn't still think she was the best person he'd ever met. "You're the smartest person I've ever met, and you've never steered me wrong. Even when... Even when we've fought about stuff, it's just because you were doing what you thought was right. I trust you not to let your emotions put people in danger, which is more than I can say for... Well, Hopper, but me, too. Joyce. Most people, I think. You, though... You're good." 

There was another long, uncomfortable silence between them. Steve kept his breathing as shallow as possible, trying not to make too much noise. Eventually, though, it had simply gone on too long for Steve to spend leaned against his counter and doing nothing-- He did still have a job. "Nance, I--" 

"I hope you have a good day at work," Nancy blurted, and then Steve heard nothing but the buzzing of the dial tone. 

"What the hell just..." Steve muttered, pulling the phone receiver away from his ear and staring at it as if it had more information on what the hell had just happened. The receiver didn't talk, just stayed inanimate in his hand, plastic and useless. "I would love to have even one day not be completely fucking weird." 

Maybe it was nothing, he told himself as he put the phone back on the hook. Maybe she was just busy, or maybe she had realized that she didn't actually want to be talking to him. Maybe she had just gotten freaked out by the way he still thought of her. 

He hoped it wasn't anything more complicated than that. Steve wasn't sure that his brain could take it. 

Luckily, Robin was more than enough distraction when he got to work. A nervous tension had taken over her body, including her brain, apparently. It was like working with a sugar-fiend elementary schooler. Everything Robin said all Saturday was twice as many words with half the substance, and she never stopped moving. She reminded Steve of a spooked squirrel, darting from station to station, hands always toying with something not meant to be toyed with. At first, Steve had tried to be sympathetic. Robin had been through a lot, learned a lot about herself and her family, this weekend. Of course she was a little shaken up. 

Still, eight hours was a long, long time. By Sunday morning, Steve almost missed the Robin who critiqued his every move and word. At least she had a personality that he could stand to be in the room with. Crisis mode had been cute at first, and then deeply annoying, but Steve had realized that this wasn't just anxiety or nerves. Robin was quickly heading into a full scale breakdown, and he wasn't sure how easily he was going to be able to clean up after that. 

After hours of talking about the weather on a loop during their Sunday shift, Steve finally gave up and broke into the heart of the matter.

"So how's it going with your parents?" 

Robin's reaction was swift, her whole body filling with anger at once until she was standing straight, her shoulders squared, and staring at him like he would attack at any moment. If she was Woged, Steve was sure her fur would actually be bristling. 

"I'm only asking because I know how it can feel," Steve said, doing his best to keep his voice soft and comforting. He made sure not to make eye contact; An accidental woge would just set her off. "I mean, you already know all about my parents, but... I had Dustin and El and Hopper to talk about it with. It's a lot to process, and I didn't want you to have to do it yourself." 

For a moment, Robin only stood stock-still, her muscles twitching with tightly held energy. Eventually, though, her stance softened, face going slack with what Steve thought might have been exhaustion. She groaned, turning away from him and leaning against the service counter. He gave her a moment, letting her work through her embarassment before she said, "I thought I was going to hate him. I really did. But then I looked him in the eyes and it... It was hard. Not because I didn't love him anymore. I do. But I know I'm not supposed to, and now when I look at him I want to throw up because I know what he's done, but he's still my dad, and I can't hate him." 

Steve hummed, considering. "Alright, that's less relatable then I thought it was going to be, can't lie." 

"But also I'm... really pissed off?" Robin ignored him, sounding unsure if she was even describing the right emotion. 

"There it is." 

"I just don't know why he would risk all our lives like this," Robin said, words in a rush and tempo gaining as she continued. "Even if your parents don't come back, ever, even if no one ever finds out... This is the exact stuff that got us kicked out of the last place. And I thought it was just rumors. I thought it was just Wesen gossip bullshit! But, no, it was his fault. And if he's not careful, then we're going to have to pack up and move again. It wasn't so bad, last time, 'cause I was so small, but... I don't have it in me to start over again. I don't! Why the hell did he think this was okay?" 

"Honestly, Rob?" Steve winced. He hated that he had to be the one to say this, because generally he was all for being as anti-parent as possible, but Robin seemed actually distressed. She deserved answers, and Steve certainly didn't have them for her. "This is going to sound insane coming from me, but I think that might be something you have to talk to your dad about." 

"And freak him out? No," Robin said, shaking her head as if she could banish the very thought, "that would just make everything worse. He'd probably move us to California on pure adrenaline alone." 

"At least you don't have to worry about my parents. You're right, I'm not sure they're ever coming home. And even if they did..." Steve shrugged. "They're not exactly keen in meeting my friends. I'm pretty sure they think I'm still hanging out with Tommy and Carol everyday. Unless your dad does something ridiculously stupid, I doubt they'd even notice." 

"This whole thing is ridiculously stupid," Robin hissed, and, yeah, she wasn't wrong, but that wasn't exactly the point Steve had been trying to make. He decided to change tactics.  

"If it helps, Hop and I have already talked about what to do if my parents come home and start causing problems," he confessed, even though he knew she would probably tease him about trying to be a super-hero again later. As long as she didn't let Dustin hear it, he was willing to sacrifice his dignity to keep her from freaking out.

"Is that the plan Dustin was talking about?" Robin asked, too in her own head to start the mocking campaign. 

"Yeah. Neither of us really felt... comfortable, letting my parents run the town the way they have until now. I don't like the idea of them holding things over people's heads. Like, I have no idea what their deal with the Wesen in Hawkins is, but I don't like it," Steve said. He wished he had talked to Wayne about it more, but he knew that revealing just how little his parents had told him would only worry the old man. "I know that, like, laws aren't that much different, but. Well. Hop isn't exactly great at those, either. I doubt he's going to change his mind just because people agreed to it when they got here." Steve wasn't great at remembering all the words for politics and wars and such, but he was pretty sure he knew right from wrong, now. Nancy had often talked about making people agree to things they actually had no choice in, just to make it look like you weren't a terrible person forcing people into things. His parents loved that trick; There was never a rule in the Harrington household they couldn't make him feel like shit for hating. He had no doubts they'd pull the same crap on some poor, scared stranger.

"That's great. No, seriously, it is. I'm sure for people like the Munsons, it'll be... It'll be great, to not have to worry. But my dad is doing something bad, Steve. Like, genuinely morally wrong," Robin said, and Steve had to admit that was a fair point. "Hopper would have a problem with that. And he would be right to." 

"Why does Hopper have to know about it?" Steve asked, confused.

"... You would keep it from him? I thought he was, like, your 'psuedo-dad' or whatever," Robin said, air quotes and all. 

"I keep things from Hop literally all the time," Steve said with a scoff. He wasn't sure when he had suddenly changed into such a good boy in Robin's eyes, but lying to parents had always been part of the Steve Harrington brand. When that parent was a cop, all the practice came in handy. "It's the only way El gets to see sunlight or hold hands with her boyfriend. I'm, like, a fucking professional at keeping things from Hopper. The criminals of Hawkins should be asking me for tips, at this point." 

"Classy," Robin said, grinning. Likely at the image of a hardened criminal having an actual conversation with Steve. He knew it was ridiculous; That's why he said it.  

"Besides, it's not like your dad is the one killing people or grinding them up. If I had to guess, he's sourcing them out of state. Maybe from a morgue or something?" Steve said, unable to stop himself from pulling a disgusted face. "Like, if this is a big operation, they're probably trying to keep it as clean as possible, to not get attention. I doubt anyone is dying because of him. People would notice!  Someone just thought it was a good opportunity for a quick buck." 

"You almost sound like you think he should keep doing it," Robin grumbled.

"No, it's still gross," Steve said. He'd always thought drugs were kind of stupid, honestly. Sure, some weed from time to time was fine, it was basically no different than drinking a lot, but otherwise it all seemed like a really expensive way to lose your teeth and die early. The idea of adding that to cannibalism was even wilder. He couldn't imagine ever needing a high that badly. "If you came in loaded on human heart one day, I'd probably stop talking to you. I definitely don't think I can look Mrs. Henderson in the eye again. But, uh, I don't think anyone deserves to die for it. Especially when the problem seems so..." Steve wasn't sure he had the words for it.

"So?" Robin prompted.

"I mean, he's not the only person doing it, you know?" Steve asked, hands spreading parallel as if he was making a globe. "The problem is bigger than him. Your dad being punished isn't actually going to do all that much, when you think about it. Like, have you thought about how weird it is that half the missing kids had parents in his black book? That's fucked. And the thing is, if something happened to your dad, they would just get it somewhere else. I think if we wanna stop this drug organ thing, it's gonna take a lot more time and patience than any Harrington has, including me."

Robin nodded to herself, silently, brow creased with thought. Steve, a little surprised that had actually made sense to her, turned back to scraping dried ice cream off the freezer. He didn't get very far before Robin said, "Please don't take this the wrong way, Steve, but I have to ask." 

"Yeah?" 

"Why do you go so far to save people like my dad when I know you're terrified of pissing yours off?" When Steve turned to look at her, Robin's face was solemn and her blue eyes were intense. Predator eyes. "You know what's gonna happen. I know you know. So why are you doing it anyway?" 

Steve looked down at the scraper in his hands, picking at the residue on the edge with his thumb nail. He didn't like thinking about the inevitable end, hated even more knowing that he was only speeding it up. But Steve had told himself, two years ago, that he had to stop letting fear keep him from doing the right thing. And to his own surprise, he actually had. Steve wasn't about to break that streak now. 

"... Your dad is a good dad?" he asked. 

Robin sighed. "He doesn't always do it the right way, but I can't imagine a dad who would love me more than him." 

Steve smiled sadly, and shrugged. "That's good enough for me." 

After work that day, Steve came home to find his parents' answering machine blinking red at him. The kids hardly used the thing when they were calling Steve, mostly because they knew if he didn't answer they were more likely to find him somewhere else. The only people who really left messages were his parents' coworkers, which Steve had always thought was rather rich. They, of all people, should know his parents were off on business trips-- It made a lot more sense now that he knew. As Steve got older, the messages grew more and more sparing. Still, the answering machine blinked. 

Steve rewound the recording and hit play. 

"Steve, it's Nancy," the recording said. Nancy's voice wavered on her own name. "Can you call me ba--" 

Nancy's voice cracked, and that was all it took for Steve stop the recording and pick up the phone. 

"Wheeler residence, this is N--" 

"Nancy, it's me." Steve frowned. He could hear her sniffling over the line, breathing deeply like she only did when she didn't want someone to notice that she was losing it. They had always been alike that way, never wanting the other one to see them cry. Steve had always just let her pretend, not wanting to push her out of her comfort zone. Well, he was sick of pretending. 

"Oh, Steve. Good," Nancy said, voice uncharacteristically flat. "I was worried. I didn't--" 

Steve cut through the bullshit. "Nancy, what's wrong?" 

Nancy breathed deep. "Have you watched the news in the past two days?" she asked, voice soft. Like she was trying to gentle a blow. Like she was making bad news easier to bear.

"No," Steve said, blood running cold. He couldn't stop it. He knew he couldn't stop it now, when it was too late, but he tried bargaining with the universe anyway. Nancy was smarter than him; she could stop it, right? She could make it all go away. "Nancy, it was two days. I took two days to stop and do research," he begged. It was a poor excuse, but he was so tired.

"There's been five more," Nancy said, voice weak. 

"No. Are you--" Steve's stomach lurched, and he stopped talking for fear he would vomit if he tried. He felt his body lean against the wall next to the phone, and closed his eyes, accepting the weakness that overtook him.

"I've checked the list a hundred times, Steve." Nancy took a deep breath, the air rattling in her lungs. "They're not here." 

"No." Steve couldn't even regret the sob in his voice. It was as gentle as he could make it, when he wanted to scream. 

"Steve, they're... they were close," Nancy whispered. "Close enough that the news anchors keep talking about Will and Barb." 

Steve flinched like she had punched him in the chest. He had brought her into this. He had failed Nancy as much as he had failed those kids. Everytime Steve tried to breathe, it got caught in his throat-- He could feel the sorrow and the panic making a fist around his throat and squeezing tight."I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, Nance." 

"They're not wrong," Nancy continued, and she didn't sound like herself. She sounded distant, faraway, like it couldn't reach her anymore. Like something outside of herself was compelling her to keep talking, when the girl herself just wanted to be done with it. "Everything the cops are saying... It's her, Steve. Parents and friends in the same house, and they're still just gone. Not a sound, no sign of a struggle. No witnesses. It's her. It's what happened to her." 

"I'm sorry. Fuck, I'm sorry." What else was he supposed to say?

A long moment passed, Steve just listening to Nancy breathe on the line while he tried not to cry loud enough to disturb her. Eventually, she said, voice the youngest Steve had ever heard it, "Steve, can you-- Can you find them? You said you knew who was taking these kids; Can you find them?" 

"I don't... Nancy, I don't think they're alive," he admitted. Steve had never said it out loud before, fearing that it would make things too real. He hadn't wanted to scare Dustin, hadn't wanted to tempt fate-- Steve had kept telling himself that it didn't matter, that as long as he could stop it before it hunted again, then it would be okay. But he was wrong. He had been so, so wrong. And now it was time for him to admit it. "The thing that's taking them is a hunter. The things they can do... It's bad. I can't bring them home. I'm sorry." 

Nancy's breath hitched on the end of the line, and Steve realized she was crying. A year of dating, and it was only eight months after their breakup that they cried together. For Barb, for every kid growing up in a place that wanted them dead, for themselves. 

"I'm sorry." Steve's fingernails bit into his skin. He could feel himself woge, and wished that he had claws like Robin or Eddie, something sharp enough to make him bleed like he deserved. 

Even though he could still hear the rhythmic wheeze of her sobs, Nancy's voice was cold when she spoke again. "We don't have time for sorry, Steve. You find him. You find him, and then you make him pay. Do you understand?" 

Yeah. Yeah, he could do that. Maybe he couldn't bleed, but he would make sure someone did. 

"I promise. I promise, Nance." 

#oimw #steddie #stobin #platonic stancy #grimm au #i hope you guys like wayne and also platonic stancy bc it's the wayne and platonic stancy chapter

[beginningdrawing]

Art Tips Two: Drawing What You See Vs. What You Think You See

The first significant assignment for my drawing class was to do a modified contour drawing of a building, spending at least 4 hours on the drawing. For a modified contour drawing, you are supposed to keep your eyes on the subject about 95 percent of the time, looking at the paper only occasionally to place your pencil or check the lines you are making; it is a type of drawing that really reinforces the connection between what your eyes are seeing and what your hand is drawing. It's less about creating realistic art and more about hand-eye coordination.

It's quite clear that many students in my class did not understand the assignment. I've drawn something similar to the things I've seen submitted and will be comparing it to the drawing that I did for the same assignment.

But let's start with the fact that brains are very weird and one of the things that's so weird about them is that we spend a lot of time not seeing.

Most people don't process 100% of the full detail of the things they see around them in day-to-day life. If you were to process that much detail about everything all the time, you would be constantly overstimulated by it. So your brain takes shortcuts and sort of fills in the details instead of processing every single thing. It looks at a sidewalk and says "okay, I know what a sidewalk looks like, no need to render all the shadows unless something breaks the expected pattern because a break in the pattern might mean a trip hazard."

This is very useful in day to day life! People who have trouble tuning out details of sounds and sights and sensations often find themselves overwhelmed and frustrated. It's a good thing that you are likely not seeing every tiny little irregularity in the bricks in your walls or the fibers of your clothing.

However, seeing precise detail is important for representational drawing.

Because this is a *beginning* drawing class, it is about learning the basics of drawing what you see, not stylizing images or creating art from your imagination, so the very first lessons are about how to see what you want to draw. Blind Contour drawings are almost entirely about seeing and hardly at all about drawing, and Modified Contour is about *mostly* seeing and only somewhat drawing.

When people (adults especially) begin to learn to draw, they often want to draw what they think they see (the world with the details their brain has sanded off) and not what they actually see. Sometimes this is because they think the things they think they see look "better" (more intentional) than the things they think they see.

(As a side note, my cartooning professor liked to tell a story about doing commercial illustration for a sock company; he drew an accurate, realistic foot for the ad and it got sent back he asked what was wrong with it and they said "nobody is going to buy socks when they're on such ugly feet". The next ad he sent featured a simplified, cartoonish foot and was accepted with the feedback "much better, much more realistic" - we often see stylized things as more real than real things because we spend so much time eliding what the real world looks like)

Okay, with all of that in mind, here is a drawing similar to what many of my classmates turned in next to the drawing that I turned in.

The first one is full of things that the artist thinks they see. It has trees that don't look like real trees, but do somewhat look like the idea of trees that people get from cartoons. It has sidewalks that don't look like real sidewalks, but look like how your brain thinks a series of evenly-sized concrete slabs on flat ground should look. The artist knows a little bit about perspective, and as such has drawn straight lines aimed at a point on the horizon to show distance, but you would almost never see that many straight lines in an apartment complex. They have scribbled in some grass, but those scribbles are a signifier that there is grass in those spaces, not a representation of what the lawn area actually looks like. This is a drawing from someone who saw the assignment "draw a detailed building" and 1) ignored the time requirement and 2) was not aware that the purpose of the assignment wasn't to draw what a building looked like in their mind, it was to draw the lines on a building that they actually saw.

My drawing is certainly not a fully accurate representation of the building I was drawing; the perspective is wonky and the whole thing ended up being very cramped compared to the actual building, but it is much more representational than the first drawing because it was completed by very slowly following the lines that I saw and putting them down on paper.

I'm not trying to mock the other students in this class, this isn't me being mean or trying to show off that I'm more skilled, this is a constructive criticism that I wish I could offer to the other students but that I will share here instead for the people who want to learn and may be running into this issue as the assignments continue.

This is the difference between drawing what you think you see, and trying to draw what you actually see. And also putting in the time; unfortunately a lot of students just clearly didn't spend the time on this. If you don't have the time or focus for a four-hour drawing it's better to work on several smaller drawings of simpler objects in 5-10 minute increments than it is to rush through one big drawing and fill in the gaps with details that aren't there.

If you are trying to learn to draw, learning from the basics is the best way to do it, which sometimes means forgetting what you already think you know.

You don't know perspective, you don't know shading, you don't know what trees look like, you don't know what a sidewalk looks like. When you're learning to draw, don't assume that you know what these things look like, and instead draw what you actually see.

[destinygoldenstar]

I’m sorry, but even if you adore Sierra as a character, you have to admit that the shows depiction of her is god awful.

This woman is the forefront of Total Drama’s nasty habit of romanticizing S/A and abusive relationships. Not saying other characters aren’t as well. But almost all of the characters screen time is dedicated to her sexually harassing Cody.

This woman is characterized to have an unhealthy obsession over a boy she barely knows in real life at the time. She uses his essentials, kisses him, carries him around, sniffs him, stalk him, does weird stuff to him while he’s asleep, and all sorts of other stuff WITHOUT HIS CONSENT. She also forges marriage onto him. She feeds him tea that paralyzes him with the intention to get him to have to have sex with her.

AND THATS NOT EVEN EVERYTHING SHE DOES.

Nothing she does is okay. How she treats Cody is not okay. And whenever Cody stands up for himself and expresses he’s uncomfortable, or when other people tell her she’s a creep, she plays the victim and cries until they give her what she wants.

Sierra is a dangerous human being. Plain and simple.

Now, I’m not someone who’s had S/A that’s been THAT bad in my life, so if you are an S/A victim, please reblog your thoughts on the character. Please to be brutally honest.

For my POV though, I might have been okay with this depiction of Sierra as a character if the sexual harassment was painted in a negative light.

What I mean by that is if the writing intentionally framed it as an awful thing and that the story was about either getting out of this awful situation or it’s meant to be a cautionary tale on the horrors of sexual harassment.

Here’s the problem. ITS NOT. WERE SUPPOSED TO FIND THIS FUNNY.

It’s all painted as if it’s a huge joke. A great running gag. That all this sexual harassment towards Cody is hilarious.

And the lesson? At best, Sierra gets depicted as a bit of a creep by the other characters and there’s only a handful of scenes where they talk to him about how to get her off of him. And even then, those are usually advice given by intentionally antagonistic characters, implying we’re not supposed to agree with them. And the show never goes through with their advice anyway. At worst, Sierra is painted as the one in the right, and CODY has to learn the lesson TO LIKE HER BACK AND ACCEPT HER.

I’m sorry. You cannot tell me that this is not romanticizing sexual harassment and sexual abuse. If this wasn’t a kids show, you know they would’ve had a full on r@#e scene made for sh*ts and giggles.

I’m not someone who says that a media having a bad thing in it means it’s automatically endorsing the bad thing. There’s a lot that goes into how that bad thing is presented. Like the bad thing being painted in a negative light like I said. The obvious bad guys being the only ones doing the bad thing. The story being an intended cautionary tale and thus it’s designed not to take the story as endorsement of the things in it. Or the bad thing being used as a talking point to spread awareness about it. It’ll make you uncomfortable. Yes. But that’s the point.

This is just my take, feel free to disagree with me, but that’s exactly why I saw Hazbin’s Hotel’s depiction on the same subject as NOT romanticizing S/A and instead spreading awareness and painting the S/A in the negative light. I didn’t see it as romanticizing the abuse. (I could be completely wrong and it is. You’re justified if you see it that way.)

Because THIS. This is ACTUAL romanticization of abuse.

I understand the show was made in 2007 and people were weird back then. I get that this could just be a situation where it’s dated. Doesn’t make it okay.

This is my least favorite aspect of Total Drama and I feel like that’s objective rather than subjective. And while it’s not AS bad as Sierra, the show still does it by painting toxic relationships as jokes.

Please stop this Total Drama.

#total drama #Td sierra #td cody #tw sex assault #tw sex abuse #tw harassment