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frenziedslashers · 1 year

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Hear me out on this one, negan with a transmasc s/o and he grinds his bat against them

My Two Favorite's

A/N: PLEAASE, I HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS SINCE YOU SENT IT LMAOO (Also, I LOVE your pfp. I love Dewey sm 🫶)

Warnings: Negan(he is a warning let's be fr), Object grinding(?), Fingering, brief spanking, Punishing, uhh body dysmorphia, if I missed anything lmk, it's like 3am here. Negan also may be ooc idk. Enjoyy:))

Pairing: Negan Smith x Transmasc!Reader

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God he could be such an ass.

Negan was a lot to work with and everyone knew it. Even the people within the compound, who dropped to their knees out of "respect" knew that he was a pain. You knew the respect was mostly fear, though. Everyone knew that much.

He had picked you up towards the beginning of all of this. Offering you a safe haven. Sanctuary. You were on your own, fighting and running daily, so of course. You trusted him, and truthfully, you still did.

Even though he did some mighty questionable, and some would even say cruel things. You trusted him with your life. He never gave you a reason to doubt him or believe that he would harm you. He would put himself between you and the line of fire any day, and you knew it. You were his weakness. His rock.

"You wanna talk back now?" He quipped, following you into your room. Though he offered to share his room with you, you requested to keep your own. You still carried this fear of getting too attached to the man. That one day he might not betray you, but he might leave. Not by his choice, but the choice of the cruel world that you both lived in. He wasn't exactly liked by many.

You huffed as he continued to follow you into the bedroom. Throwing your hands up in exasperation. "I just don't understand why you keep me trapped in here!" You snapped, and he tutted. You couldn't bring yourself to look at him. You just knew that stupid smirk was on his face. "And what exactly are you even trying to leave for, Mister? You got everything you could ever need here, where it's safe." You hated how much he cared about you sometimes. Other times, it'd make you smile and your stomach would tingle with that feeling you swore you'd never feel again after the apocalypse hit.

The sigh that left your nostrils made him raise his brows. The angrier you got, the thinner the ice you treaded on became. Negan wasn't exactly a guy you wanted to piss off and you knew that. "I just want to leave," He opened his mouth, but your eyes that met his were quick to ridden his fear of you leaving for good. "Not forever, I can't leave here, and you know it." That he did, you had nowhere else to go. Unless you decided to live in one of the communities that they 'owned'. "I'm just tired of being locked up. I feel like I'm in a prison and you're forcing me to be here because for some fucking reason you care about me." You snapped, and he nodded, his eyes darting over your face with the look in his eyes that you despised.

"Will you stop looking at me like that?" You asked, and he furrowed his brow, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "Like what?" "Like you actually care." His smile was quick to fade at your words. Expression looking a little offended at what you said. "The hell is that supposed to mean? Why in God's name would I not care about you?" He asked, and you felt a tinge of guilt shoot through you. In the years that you had been with him, you still hadn't accepted the fact that he does care about you. Stepping backward as he approached you with heavy steps.

"You know what? No, you can't leave. Not when you think I don't give two damns about you." He snarled, one hand reaching out to point and poke at the center of your chest right below your collarbone. His other hand gripping Lucille with a force that turned his knuckles white. "You act like we haven't been fighting together for years. Like I don't pass up women and men who offer me a hell of a night because I fucking care about you. I don't know how many goddamn times I have to tell you that too!" He exclaimed, his nostrils flaring. You wanted to feel bad, but your eyes only narrowed on him with a huff of your own.

"Oh! Sorry, I'm your biggest cock block of the century!" He narrowed his eyes at your statement. "That's not what I was sayin' and you know it," "Go fuck yourself, Negan." You spat, and that was the man's final straw. "You watch your tone with me, boy." He barked, and you flinched. He'd never raised his voice like that with you. You should have known it'd be coming one of these days.

In the beginning, Negan was so gentle and careful with you. He'd give you space when you needed it, all while keeping his eyes on you at all times. Making sure his men and women were treating you well. He'd talk with you, make you smile, and laugh. He'd treat you kindly and respect you. Even in these dark times, he was a beacon of light. A man that actually respected your chosen pronouns - despite what you were "supposed to be". Any of the Saviors that would misgender you, or call you slurs, he'd take care of them personally.

Negan was always so kind to you. If his sarcasm was too much he'd do his best to tone it down with you, or at least let you know when he was joking with a simple "that was a joke, by the way." He wanted nothing more than for you to let him in, but you were so stubborn. He could tell that even before the apocalypse you weren't an easy-trusting person, yet he respected that. You shouldn't trust people, even though he wished you would trust him.

Recently, though. It was getting harder and harder for you both. Negan was fighting with keeping his two current communities together - The Kingdom and Hilltop. He was too busy leading and you were too busy pulling away from him, which pissed him off to no extent. He wanted you to understand that he loved you, he really did.

Negan was staring down at you, and you coward - just the slightest. Watching as his chest heaved and his eyes burnt holes into you. "You ever speak to me like that again, I'll make you wish you never did." He snarled, and you felt your chest tighten with panic and anxiety. Like maybe you stepped on his toes too many times over the years and your attempts at keeping yourself safe from his inevitable fall only pushed him away from you. It wasn't until this that you finally realized how much you missed that stupidly obnoxious smile of his.

"Negan," you frowned, and he shook his head. "You've tried me too much over the past few months. I am done being nice to you," he stated, but he didn't move, and that almost scared you more than what he was saying to you. "I'm sorry," you muttered, and he nodded. "You better fucking be." He snarled, and you nodded back. Your head dipping down. Noticing how white his knuckles were around his bat, still.

What you were doing now was risky as hell. One wrong move and that bat could very well cave in your skull, but you still, through thick, trusted him. You reached for his hand, fingers brushing over his knuckles and it made him flinch. The man inhaled sharply before his eyes flicked down to your hand. He wanted to reach out and grab you. Pull you against him and show you just how much he cared for you while also reminding you who ran the show here, but he didn't move. Not yet, anyway.

Negans eyes watched as you grabbed his fist. His muscles relaxed under your touch, but it didn't stop the anger that coursed his veins. It wasn't until you looked up at him that he felt those emotions slowly dissipate. Maybe he was being too harsh on you, maybe he needed to give you space. "I care about you too, you know." He raised his brows a little at the confession. A nearly unnoticeable reaction that told so many emotions in the man's eyes. He just never assumed that he would hear you admit such a thing. Especially not after he yelled at you.

"I'm sorry I was pushing you away. I just get scared. I was getting so close with you and," You chewed on your bottom lip, and he nodded. "I get it," he told you, and your eyes bounced between his. "I pushed you, I wasn't here, you probably think I'm dead anytime we show up late to the compound," he told you, reaching up to brush his knuckles over your jaw, and you nodded with a soft chuckle. "Yeah, unfortunately, I do." He smiled, "Well, I'm not dead, and even if the apocalypse wasn't amongst us, I could be killed by anything. A car, a rabid dog, lightning," he chuckled, and you let yourself smile. Just a little, but it was enough for him.

He was silent again for a moment before he leaned forward a little more. "I want you to trust me," He spoke, his voice low. It was just for you to hear. His eyes scanned yours for any sign of discomfort. "Do you trust me?" He asked, and you nodded. "I have since you found me," he smiled at that confession. His obnoxious grin graced his lips that showed off his stupidly perfect teeth. "Now, that's what I wanna hear." And you knew everything you said went straight to his head.

He leaned in a little more, but you didn't move. Only watched as his smile faded just a little, and he set Lucille on the table beside you. One hand held your waist while the other cupped the side of your face. Can I kiss you? is the look you read in his eyes, and you nodded. Even if he didn't ask the question out loud, you practically knew what he was thinking. That small nod was all the taller man needed before he was leaning forward to press a kiss to your lips.

You had expected the kiss to be rough at first, but it wasn't. He was slow, making sure not to scare you off. It wasn't until you grabbed his waist with one of your own hands and the other snaked through the hair on the back of his head that he deepened it and got more hungry with it. Lips pressed firmly against yours until you were each practically kissing with your teeth. He's wanted this for so long and he wasn't about to stop with just a kiss. As long as you were okay with it all.

He pushed you forward towards the bed in your room with a groan. The backs of your legs came in contact with the piece of furniture, buckling from the contact and he was quick to push you down onto the mattress. Giving you a few longing kisses before pulling away from you. "Gonna go shut the door, no need having anyone see us," he told you with a cheesy grin. Dipping back down to kiss your stomach before turning back for the door.

His steps were quick, and you could tell how excited he was that this was finally happening. It made you smile a little knowing he's waited for you for so long. If anything, it had you more excited about the situation at hand. You wanted to take your shirt off, but that familiar feeling of insecurity rose up the back of your neck when you remembered the world fell to shit before you could exactly get top surgery. Or bottom. You were in a body that you hated, and you didn't tell Negan, but it was partially the reason why you didn't want to exactly pursue a relationship with him.

He was quick to distract you with his voice, though. Eyes drifted up to meet his when he stood in front of you. "You still trust me, handsome?" He asked, and that simple word had some of those insecurities dwindling. "Of course I do," you hummed with a smile, scooting further up the bed and he smiled back. "Good, I'll go easy on you," He bellowed, "But you got some learning to do after yelling at me like that earlier." He told you, and you felt your stomach churn at his loose threat. Swallowing thickly when you noticed the bat that he carried everywhere with him was in his right hand. Covered in barbed wire that you knew would sting if you so much as pricked your finger on it.

"Lay down," he ordered and you did as told. Even if your eyes watched that bat with a fearful gaze. He noticed it and only smiled. "Don't you worry, baby. I won't hurt ya, I promise." He told you, leaning down to press another kiss to your lips that eased your worries away. "Have I ever hurt ya?" He asked, and you shook your head just as quickly as he asked the question. A soft 'no' fell from your lips which only made him smile back. "Exactly, ain't starting now either," He hummed, leaning down to kiss the shell of your ear, a hand resting on your stomach. "Unless you want me to," he growled into your ear and you felt yourself shudder.

Before you could answer him he was positioning himself to the side of you. One hand parted your thighs while the other brought Lucille between your legs. He watched what he was doing carefully, but his smug smile didn't fade from his face once. "God, you both are so beautiful, so handsome, you know that?" He asked, and you opened your mouth to ask what he was doing, but your lips fell shut. Worried he might punish you further for asking questions.

You gasped when he brought the base of Lucille to your clothed mound. Gasping through parted lips while gripping the sheets. Sighing when his lips kissed your throat. "You gonna tell me to go fuck myself again?" He asked, and you had half a mind to say you might, but he pressed the bat against you in a way that had you hissing. Your brows furrowed as the man ground the object against you in a steady motion. "Answer when spoken to," he said against your throat, feeling his facial hair burn at your skin and you couldn't help but wonder what it would feel like between your thighs.

"No, no I won't," you muttered with a shaky breath as he rubbed you just right. "Good boy," he cooed, and you felt your skin prick at his words. "You wanna thank Lucille? She's making you feel good too," he purred, and when you didn't answer he bit at your shoulder. "Thank you, Lu-Lucille," you blurted, and he let out another breathy chuckle against your throat. "Good," he purred, nudging your jaw with his nose. "Now, my gorgeous, gorgeous boy. Tell me what you want."

It felt like he was slowly stripping you from your dignity. Pursing your lips when you thought about protesting, but the way he was pressing that stupid bat against you had your body aching for something more. "I want your hands to touch me, that stupid-" you let out a hiss when he pressed the base of the bat against you rather roughly. "Instead of Lucille. I want to feel your hands against my skin, Negan," you breathed out, and you'd never seen him look so smug.

The man gently reached over to lean Lucille against the wall and he was hovering over you in an instant. "You're doing so good," he praised, and you felt your body ache at his words. You haven't heard praise in what felt like forever. Sure, he's praised you as you worked, but this felt oh so different. More intimate and meaningful.

His hands went to the bottom of your shirt, but when your own came to stop his, he looked up at you with a look that you'd never seen before. "I told you, I won't hurt you. Physically or emotionally, you can trust me on that."He told you, and you nodded, pulling your hands back in order for him to pull your shirt over your head. Looking at the bandages that bound your chest. Frowning at how tightly wound they looked on your body. "Honey," his voice was sweet, "We're gonna have to find you something safer than these bandages." He told you, leaning down to kiss your sternum and you felt your eyes prick with tears. You've never had anyone offer to help you feel comfortable in your own skin, and it had your heart yearning.

You grabbed his head and pulled him up for a kiss. The man smiling when you did so. He loved how needy you seemed right now. He'd never seen you like this. Your walls were still up, but a door was unlocked just for Negan. The leader was able to open it and enter into the fortress that you built yourself to hide away in for God only knows how long.

He didn't dare touch the bandages. His fingers ran over the top and bottom of them gently, in order to show that he cared. Plus, to look at the angry marks that dug into your skin and made his heartache. He knows this is how you've been binding your chest since the beginning, and maybe even longer. He wanted to ask if you sleep like that, if you ever give yourself a break from the tightly wound bandages, but he didn't. That was a conversation for another time.

His lips came to meet your own in a tender and passionate kiss. As if to tell you with his lips that he was there to show you a good time. He wanted you to enjoy this just as much as he did. Even if he was going to tease the hell out of you for that mini outburst earlier. He simply can't let that slide. Though, in a way, he was. He would do so much worse to anyone that wasn't you. He wouldn't be kissing and fucking them good. He'd probably be picking out a spot for them on that chain-linked fence that wrapped around the compound.

He grumbled while your hands reached up to move his leather jacket over his shoulders. Negan shrugged them so the jacket would slide off easier. Before tossing it to the side with a hum. His own hands were dancing along your skin. Calloused fingertips brushing against the soft skin of your stomach, hips, the skin of your arms, and your collar bone. One hand finally wrapping around your throat. His thumb felt your pulse, and how it sped up when he pressed a little harder. "Neg'," you moaned into his mouth, and he ate that noise up like candy. Pulling back in order to look at you with that wolfish smirk.

That's what he was. A wolf. He was always thirsty for blood and violence. The leader of his pack of other vicious and mangey wolves. You were simply a little lost lamb that he brought in. He liked to think that he had you wrapped around his finger, but everyone, even deep down himself. They all knew you were the one who had the big bad wolf wrapped around your little finger. He'd kneel for you out of respect if you truly asked him to. He'd do a lot for you if you asked. He trusted you more than anyone in this compound, and he hoped one day you would realize that.

"Can I take your pants off?" He asked, and you knew he was just trying to be sweet and not scare you after the whole shirt situation, but you couldn't help and roll your eyes at the way he said it. He asked so bluntly, so Negan.

"Only if you take your shirt off."

He smiled fondly at your words and did as told. Reaching behind himself to grab the thin and worn fabric before pulling it over his head. Noticing how quick your eyes were to lock on the muscles of his shoulders, then to his chest, and down to the hairs that littered down his stomach into his pants. He was so gorgeous, really. His body told stories without words. Tattoos that you wondered if they all had meaning behind them; or none at all. The scars that were scattered along his chest, arms, and stomach were new and old. They told his character. How strong he really was and the struggles he's seemed to go through his whole life.

You watched closely as his muscles flinched when you reached out to touch a bigger scar on his side. Your eyes darted up to meet his, and he had a warning look in his eyes. Watching your next moves cautiously and carefully. He trusted you though, and you could tell.

The pads of your fingers brushed over it, feathery light. The man smiled faintly when you leaned forward to press a soft kiss over it. Allowing his eyes to flutter shut with a small hum. "Don't get too sappy on me," he grumbled, and you chuckled, licking up his left pectoral to his collar bone and the groan he released was heavenly. "Who said I was a sap?" You asked, biting down on his shoulder just like he did yours early. Both of you marked one another with your teeth and it had him ecstatic.

He pushed you back down on the bed, flipping your body over so you were now on your stomach. His hands reached down for your pants, hooking his fingers under the hem of the clothing while kissing your shoulders. One on the left, then one on the right. "May I?" He asked, and you nodded, raising your ass a little which had his chest vibrating with a laugh.

He pulled your pants down, quickly. Your underwear coming with them which made you gasp at the feeling of cool air on you. "God, you're such a pretty boy, you know that? So handsome, all for me." He snickered, kissing the back of your thigh before sucking. Leaving a violet mark behind. The sight making him grumble as he left a few more marks on your thighs. A large palm resting on your ass.

You weren't sure what to expect, but it definitely wasn't your body sliding over the mattress. Your lower half now on his lap. "Now, for that tone of voice you used with me earlier," he spoke, a smile curling at his lips when you looked over your shoulder. "Negan," you tried to plead and he shook his head. His large hand kneaded at the flesh. His other hand reached to undo his belt while unbuttoning and unzipping his pants. "Another peep out of you, and I walk out that door. Got it?" He asked, and you nodded. You knew he would, too. He wasn't one to throw around loose threats.

He raised his hand up and brought it down with a loud 'slap' against your skin. A hiss leaves your throat at the sensation. Burying your face in the bed with a wince. "What do you have to say?" He asked, and you didn't answer. "Answer when spoken to," he growled out, reaching over to grab the front of your throat, squeezing lightly. "Thought you said not to talk?" He slapped your ass again. Harder than before, and you lurched forward with a groan. "I'm sorry!" You shouted, and he grinned. "That's what I thought." He hummed with a light chuckle.

He kneaded at the flesh of your ass again. Humming while thinking. "Now," he stared, parting your thighs. "If you behave well, be a good boy for me, I'll fuck you no strings attached."He told you, reaching between your legs to press two thick fingers between your folds. "If you don't," He pressed a finger inside you, the other rubbing over your clit. Watching how you writhed beneath his touch. "I draw this out and well, you don't get anything out of it and I simply leave. Understand?" He asked, and you nodded, "I understand," he smiled, curling his finger inside you before pulling his hand away. Shifting in order to put you back on your back on bed.

Negan stood in front of the bed, pulling his jeans and boxers off before climbing back between your legs. "Now, repeat after me," he hummed. "Negan, I will not talk to you like that ever again. I will do as I am told, and if I leave the compound I will be sure to tell you and have either you or someone else go along." You muttered the words back to him, and he shook his head with a tut, grabbing your jaw with strong fingers. His dark eyes scanning yours with a grin. "A little louder, my prince," he toyed, and you glared a little at the nickname. If it weren't how you ached for him you would have cursed him out. "Negan," you spoke, and he tilted his head, listening as you said the rest of the spiel. "That's better," he told you, leaning down to press a kiss to your lips. "Now how about we reward you for that."

Negan pushed your legs apart with a hum. Two of his fingers pressing inside of you which had you tensing. "Fuck, Negan," you moaned, and he chuckled, kissing your jaw with a sigh. "God, you're gonna feel absolutely delicious." He told you with a snicker.

He said a few more words for you to repeat back to him. Finally, rewarding you by removing his fingers and positioning himself with your entrance. He stared at you for a moment. A look in his eyes that had you a little worried. Wondering if maybe he was regretting this. A wave of insecurities rushing over yourself. What if he didn't want you? He just wanted the idea of you. You were already so exposed, you'd have to leave if he just stopped. Join one of the other communities and never look at Negan again.

"You do trust me, right?" The concern that dripped from his voice caught you off guard. Your eyes racing to his as he stared back at you. He looked almost scared, and that scared you. You've never seen him lower his own walls. It was like you were seeing inside him and all you could do was offer him a smile. Reaching out to wrap your arms around his neck to pull him close. "Negan," he waited for you to continue. His eyes begging you to carry on. "If I didn't trust you I wouldn't be here right now. I would have left the night you brought me here. I trust you more than I would like to admit," He told you, leaning forward to brush your lips against his. Negan leaning forward to lock his lips with yours. Pushing you back into the bed before finally pushing himself within you.

He was right, too. You did feel absolutely Devine. He held you like this for a while. Feeling as your body tensed from the intrusion. Your hand tugged at his hair while the other clawed at his back. He didn't break from the kiss, though. He needed to kiss you. To eat you up. He could if you would only let him.

Once you rolled your hips he was sure to be steady as his hips rolled against you. Working his way up to a slower pace until he was confident enough to start snapping his hips against your own. Each snap of his hips had you grabbing harder, and harder at him. His hands were grabbing at your hips with a force that you were sure would leave two hand shaped bruises.

He truly screwed you like he meant it. He's wanted this since the moment he laid eyes on you, and the fact that he waited for this long drove him crazy. His hips moved faster the faster your breathing got. Listening to every noise that indicated he was doing something right. his hands pleasuring you just as much as your body pleasured him.

He never truly thought he would ever get to have sex with you. With how reserved and closed off you always were. Anytime you flirted back with him that was enough to settle his wandering mind, but it was never enough. He wanted you to be his, and now he had you. Or at least he hoped this wasn't just a one-time thing. Honestly, if you never wanted to have sex again he wouldn't care. So long as he could call you his. If you didn't want that, he'd try his best to push the hurt feelings aside and accept it, though. He hoped you wanted something between the two of you to grow. The way you looked at him gave him at least an ounce of hope for a future with you.

"Negan," you cried, and he nodded his head. "Let go for me, baby," he panted into your ear, and you nodded. Kissing and then burying your face into his shoulder. Letting out a cry of his name while your orgasm took the reins. Your hips rolling to meet his thrusts.

Once you fell limp, Negan was quick to thrust faster within you. Chasing his own high while he panted and muttered sweet nothings into your ear. It wasn't until his hips started staggering that he pulled out of you. His hand taking over the action of stimulation before he came onto your stomach. Stroking out his orgasm with a loud grumble that erupted from his chest. His eyebrows knitted tightly together.

He fell onto the bed beside you. His chest heaving with yours. The both of you lying there in silence. His eyes were shut, but his smile was still there. "I could hit that smile off your face," you muttered without even realizing it, and he raised his brows. Eyes still shut. "Getting mouthy again already?" you cursed yourself in your head. "No, it's just how I admire, you cocky bastard," you sighed out, leaning over to press a kiss to his shoulder. Watching the way his smile grew toothy at the small action and the banter. "God, that mouth of yours," he sighed with a throaty chuckle. "If I didn't know any better, you want me to go harder on you next time." He spoke, opening one eye to peak over with a smirk.

Next time. You smiled softly at the thought of doing this again with him. "Well," you leaned up, looking at the mess on your stomach with a sigh which he looked at as well. "Only if you ain't as goddamn messy." He snickered lightly, sitting up to kiss your cheek with a dramatic 'Mwah' sound. "Anything for you, baby boy."

#negan #negan twd #negan the walking dead #negan x reader #negan smith #Negan smith x reader #negan smith smut #the walking dead smut #twd smut

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dreamsy990 · 7 months

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im trying to draw your little guy because they're so cool but i have done 4 arts total and i have no clue how the hair works here , , (not that its bad im just terrible at perception and brain visual)

OKAY HERES AN OVERLY COMPLICATED STEP BY STEP GUIDE TO HOW I DRAW MY HAIR

basically everything is designed to be as easy and quick to draw as possible and it can all be broken down into 3 shapes. every one of them is meant to be drawn in one stroke for simplicity but if you need to take it one line at a time thats okay!

first things first is the big, defining shape. i usually draw it on the viewers right, since thats the way im most comfortable drawing curves, but it can be switched (see: my pfp where i did it the other way). the starting point/root should be at about the middle of the head, if you care much about spacing. i dont but ill try to pay attention to that here. from that you curve up and out, make it as exaggerated as you feel like. this line is supposed to go off the head for silhouette/cartoony reasons. also its fun to draw big exaggerated shapes!! after that, you pull it in for two spikes. if you cant draw the whole shape in one line, try to get these at the very least.

next shape is simple too. youre gonna start roughly where the first shape meets the head on the downward curve. then from there, its straight down, ending in another (much smaller but sharper) curve. two more spikes, and then right back up.

repeat on the other side, starting the other one pretty much wherever you see fit, so long as its pretty close to the other side of the head.

THAT LEAVES YOU WITH THIS BUT WERE NOT DONE YET BECAUSE THERES STILL A PONYTAIL!! luckily its more of the same

you start somewhere behind the start of the curve of the bangs? roughly the midpoint but it doesnt matter too much. here you get to draw a little oval for the start of the ponytail,,,, so little,,,,,,,. then its up a little bit and then down, then going right out again for two more spikes. the culmination of everything youve learned over the last. hold on lemme check my watch. okay its been like 6ish minutes for me but like 30 seconds ideally this shouldnt be too hard to draw.

and then its down to the dead eyed expression and hoodie that hasnt been washed in 1-2 weeks at an given moment, headphones are a give or take. and theres me!! being tired, mostly. oh so tired. and a bit sad. BUT THIS ISNT A CRY FOR HELP ITS AN ART TUTORIAL!!!!!!!!

these features basically stay the same for drawing me from any angle. mostly because im too lazy to think about how it should work in a 3d space. this is cartoon logic not real life logic. hair looks weird from a certain angle? jUST DONT DRAW IT FROM THAT ANGLE!!!! SWITCH THE BANGS AROUND IF YOU MUST!!!!!! THERE ARE NO FUCKING RULES

also hair down ash looks like this. and also what id look like in an ideal reality

okay thats it.

#i mostly figured this out based on a need to quickly draw myself (poorly) for a joke #in actuality if i have my hair up (which i do most of the time) its because of sensory annoyances w feeling my hair and/or hair getting-#-in the way. so i almost never actually have bangs #but theyre fun to draw!!!!!!!#doodles

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northropi · 11 months

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Quick Design Crisis Notes

I'll eventually have a more in-depth look into the future of these two designs when I get a little comic together about it, probably on the other blog. For now, let's go over some stuff I've been coming to terms with about the two. To catch anyone up:

Despite my PFP reflecting a now-quite-a-bit older design- I believe at this point the theme was still a zombified Pterosaur-girl with mechanical bits as prosthetics- the design I've actually been running with for a while is a zombified Dragon with mechanical bits as prosthetics. If you can't tell, not that much changed externally, except for a few details. That is, until...

After the Dragon design won out as a "quick few tweaks to the actual design but some fairly big lore changes that no one will notice," I... Kind of got dysphoric, in a way. Little features about how she looked were starting to gnaw at me, as I slowly started to interpret monstrous features as masculine- and subtly masculine aspects of her appearance started to bother me more than they did at first, driving me to want to just fold and make a flat-out fem character as, I suppose, escapism. So, the next character up, using a lot of assets and details from the previous design but with a new facial structure and an entirely different species and backstory, was a creepy doll thing.

However, this didn't go smoothly, and while I managed to put a lot together for her (granted, not outfits, both the Dragon and Doll models shown were still using placeholders), she's sort of fallen out of favor over a tweaked version of the Zombie Dragon design- now avoiding the traits I was getting in my own head over and kind of just introducing a nicer overall flavor- though the idea of somehow implementing doll traits into the character (such as wearing a porcelain mask to cover a decaying, skeletal face) were still floating around, waiting to be implemented if I decided to at the last second.

So that was it for the doll.

But not for a doll.

I had kind of joked for a while that if I inevitably rebranded enough it'd eventually lead to a robot, and the doll character... Well, she kinda accelerated that path. I really liked the idea of using a construct, mechanical character to represent myself, and while the Doll and Zombie motifs were ways to get that in while leaving in elements of Magic for me to play with, well, I guess I did always lean more towards technological aesthetics anyways. Previously I've also mused on the fact that I'd find a plain robot character unfitting because I don't know how to code, but honestly a robot character could be made to play off of that- like, she's sort of intimidated by people who are because she is code.

And with that I think I've fairly quickly arrived upon a character that ticks all the boxes I need her to, at least with some fleshing out. Still, it's not over yet. There's a lot of details about both designs that need refining. The Dragon, and especially the true form, have long needed updates- and I kind of want to pull through with those even if I don't end up keeping that character as my sona. The Robot needs special care to make sure a lot of motifs carry over organically (ironically), including a design that seems relatively grounded and utilitarian but still carries the seabird and reptile themes I like so much. And all this comes to a head with the fact that the Robot is a Robot and the Dragon is a Dragon.

I've mused with ideas like giving the Robot a full-blown walking tank form to match the Dragon's true form, but that feels a little... Weird. Like giving her multiple bodies would feel to "code-y," running into the problem I mentioned before as she becomes less "Robot" and more "AI," plus it'd kind of feel like a vehicle I guess? It feels less like a part of her than the Dragon does with its form shenanigans, and I feel would either overshadow her humanoid form (ie combat becomes relevant to the lore, which she obviously does in her walking tank mode, resulting in less time with the humanoid mode), or would be irrelevant (ie no combat, so why have a walking tank form?). So making a non-humanoid alt form for the robot is complicated, but having it without much in the way of mental gymnastics on the Dragon is kind of fun.

Like, I guess this is weird to the prevailing anti-self-insert attitude of the internet (which isn't wrong per se but VTuber and explicit Sona designs afford some room for self-indulgency), but having a character that is just Funny Scaly Woman but also Giant Three-Headed Albatross-Turtle whenever she feels like it is really... Yeah, fun. It's fun, it can be a nice gag for skits and comics, it lets me alternate between presenting as a humanoid for humanoid sorts of things and a nice pretty non-humanoid for ambient beauty shots or something, artistically treating her as an animal in nature in a way that even if I did go through with the Robot's big mode idea I'd still miss out on due to the way that form would turn out... To go over that last part a bit, yeah, ok, legged giant robot is unrealistic, sure, but it'd still be a grounded design, I just like making them that way, so I couldn't just make her a Dragon with a screen face and chrome skin and call it a day. She'd be a distinctly unnatural being, missing parts that animals have in favor of the streamlined design of a perhaps-improvised-but-still-pragmatic war machine- and maybe that could be a thing, separated from nature enough for that to work as a juxtaposition, but she likes it enough to try and associate with it, but also I don't fucking know let's talk about legs and wings and turboshafts and shit.

In true me fashion this is already a tad outdated. Rather than having a stocky tail that acts as an entire powerpack to which the wings are affixed, she'll probably have the engines powering the wings embedded in her body somewhere and the wings affixed to extensions of the hip, with the tail being a more biomimetic structure for balance and fuel storage- because I like short chonky tails. The wing itself is still more or less the same, with some slight detailing pending, and of course the color scheme will be... Something.

Her backstory is that she used to be a delivery robot for Legally Distinct Logistics Megacorp before everyone blew up everything and is now just trying to be helpful with long-distance deliveries between survivor camps, so she'll be designed with the idea of sterile alabaster corporatism in mind with a personalized scheme and hasty repairs over it.

The decidedly more normal limbs are actually where problems are cropping up. I'm not entirely sure how the arms and legs should look. The arms, true to life and in tradition for these characters, will be scrawny, metal tubes with a couple servos jammed in with distinctly rudimentary hands. I want to implement some sort of folding mechanism for them, maybe a sort of pauldron that locks to the hand as the forearm comes to lie parallel to the humerus, turning the arm into a single sort of pod thing.

The legs, however, are something that, true to life and in tradition for these characters, will be the opposite. Strong-looking, relevant to her flight controls, and I'm fond of the idea of making them look like floats on seaplanes and flying boats for the idea that she can basically kneeslide into a water landing when operating in such place. But I'm not sure exactly how that's going to work. She could go with plantigrade legs that end in nubs, or maybe some digitigrade look- recently I've been trying to feel out an idea for a digitigrade look where the "knee" mostly translates instead of rotates, allowing the leg to quickly retract and extend into and out of itself for jumping as well as reducing profile drag. This is also interesting because it sort of solves the little side debate in my head on how tall she should be by allowing her to control height on demand- in any case it's likely she could go back to older versions of the character being lanky monsters or become pretty short for the simple reason that I kinda find those ideas fun.

I'm also probably keeping the big central horn the later versions of the Dragon got- albeit as a clearly mechanical structure that contains her actual optics including a camera and LIDAR, with the eyes being mostly just aesthetic lights.

And, well, all that out of the way... I should probably follow up on this by drawing it while the ideas are still fresh in my mind, for once.

#art #vtuber #artist sona #oc art #sona art

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daydreamrry · 3 years

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ok so I’m gonna rant about how fucked up this fandom is and how I ended up getting KICKED OUT ( I literally got kicked out. Like asked to fucking leave) of the harrie fandom/ stan Twitter lmfaoo

So one of my biggest pet peeves are people who a.) don’t take accountability for their shit and b.) act like two faced hypocrites

A couple years ago one of my bestest friends ( who I met over stan Twitter) called me in hysterics bc she saw all over her tl people making fun of her and her body. A quick look at her bio you would know that she suffers terribly with an ED and these are the people that are supposed to TPWK?? Yea ok sure. Harries are infamous for their performative activism.

So that pissed me off and anytime I would confront a moot who was part of the bullying their response was “but my moots were doing it” or “it’s not that deep lmao it’s just a joke” these are 20 fucking something year old bitches who really think that just bc some stranger on the internet thought it was ok to bully someone then it’s cool if everyone did it ?? Like make that make sense to me.

I ended up going off like that was my last straw. I can send you ss of my thread that I made before I deleted my account but basically I said how fucked up and how entitled ppl get behind a Harry pfp and long story short I ended up getting kicked out bc “that’s how we do things here” and “ clearly i think im to cool for the fandom” and I’m “ Turing into ms. Righteous” 🙄 all bc I said that cyber bullying isn’t ok and keeping 20 year old bitches accountable for their mistakes.

I also went to One Night Only in 2019 and I literally watched a girl get jumped by other fans. Turns out ( I saw it later on twitter that night) the girl who got jumped showed up in jeans and t-shirt and god forbid someone feel comfortable at a damn near 2 hour long concert 🙄

All in all harries love to act like rainbows and butterflies when anyone on Harry’s team is active on social media but they are really the most toxic cult community I’ve ever seen. The fandom is so divided with who they ship him with to having full fights and throwing slurs over if Dunkirk or LHH is better.

Anyways that’s my two cents. This turned out to be Waugh longer than I expected lmaoo

the way my jaw dropped while reading this, i don't even have words. this is why i choose to stay away from twitter, knowing that is where all of the toxic fans are, and i don't interact with a lot of harry related tik tok videos either because even the tik tok community is toxic. the worst part is that these are literal adults who act this immature and childish. the teenage harries are young and very gullible, and the way these adult fans are acting tells the young ones that it's okay to be disrespectful and cyberbully people. how fucked up is that? you can't do anything in this fandom and i mean anything. you can't say that you don't like one outfit of harry's, you can't say that you don't like one of his songs, you can't say that his girlfriend is problematic, you can't say that he should be more grateful for his fans, you can't say a single thing without being attacked and it's gross. guarantee these are the same people who have "TPWK" in their bio. harry deserves so much better. it's always the kind, most genuine celebrities who have the worst fans, and these fans are the ones who put a bad image on harry.

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bokunoheroanalysisforthefuture · 3 years

Text

Whoo boy, been a little bit. I can’t really say much besides IRL sucks, so. Back to something that doesn’t suck, which is BNHA. This chapter is dedicated to the good bean Tenya, especially his little smile which forced me to change my pfp on discord because I just couldn’t.

I was kinda planning on doing arc summaries between sections, but honestly, the BNHA wiki already has those, so if you don’t want to go back and read through all the posts I’ve done for the pre-USJ chapters, just head over there and do a skim of the summaries there, I guess?

[No. 12 - Yeah, Just Do Your Best, Iida!]

I just love how his hand gestures are actual effective tools against enemies, I cannot even. Also, a good and friendly reminder that carbonated drinks stall his engines! I have never seen that used in fanfic, whether for crack or whump purposes… a shame.

We head right into the next morning from that battle training, with the kids being held up by the media as they ask about All Might. Izuku is a bundle of nerves as he awkwardly excuses himself to the nurse’s office, Ochako is a darling who describes All Might as super muscly, and Tenya goes into a whole ass speech with a lot of fancy language to explain the honor of being at UA and learning under All Might.

(Honestly, I find it hard to determine whether this is genuinely earnest or if he’s picked up media warding skills from his parents and older brother. It’s probably genuine, but I just love the idea behind low-key troll master Tenya who learned from the best, aka his older brother.)

Katsuki, unfortunately, is still known as ‘the kid from the sludge incident’, which I mean. I am so fucking baffled at how long the media in this have held onto that 'sludge incident' thing, like, you'd think they'd have moved on to other things by now and don't really think about it much.

It’s the same with the general public (as seen in chapter 3), like, yes, I too would have a fucking complex and anger issues if all anyone thought about in relation to me wasn't my high grades or my skill in combat or anything, but that one time a year ago where I was almost suffocated to death while the people who were supposed to save my life did fucking nothing. I mean, Katsuki has always had a complex, but This Didn't Help.

Moving on, we see the media wondering who the fuck this messy looking dude waving them off is, while Aizawa just. Fucking shoos them like they’re dogs or kids or something. His words seem like a vague attempt at being polite about shooing them, but with the hand gesture, well. Basically comes off more as a chastisement.

...honestly, this feels so weird that no one knew about it even though the kids who got in got a message from All Might saying he’d be teaching there. The only thing I and the others can assume is that there was an NDA on him teaching until it was announced to the newspapers on the first day of classes. Which would explain why it didn’t hit the news until said day…

Whatever, it’s weird, let’s just move on.

One of the reporters steps forward, asking/demanding a chance to speak to All Might about his sudden shift to teaching, only for the guy behind her to try and call out a warning - just a touch too late, as the sensors over the gate react, causing the daunting hunk of metal serving as a gate to slam closed right in front of her. Gonna guess she’s new to the reporting scene. The guy explains that the UA barrier locks down if someone without a school ID approaches the gate, and that supposedly there are more sensors throughout the campus.

The panel gives us a diagram of the three ‘levels’ of sensors - the gate/wall around the school, the walkway to the school, and the school itself. Which I think correlates to the security levels that come up later, since it’s a ‘level three’ breach, which means the school was broken into. Was it… always that fucking simple and I just totally glossed over that detail until now? orz

While the newsfolk complain about not getting comments from UA, we get to see the back of a ~mysterious figure~ who definitely isn’t the primary antagonist of the entire series. God, you can see his individual neck vertebrae.

Horrifying.

We transition to 1a’s homeroom, with Aizawa going over the battle training as well as their grades / evaluations. Aizawa calls out Katsuki and tells him to grow up and stop wasting his talent, which Katsuki grudgingly accepts. Izuku jolts at being called out next over his broken arm, and accepts the chastisement of learning to control his quirk, because trying isn’t going to cut it. Aizawa does soften the blow, however, by repeating that Izuku has potential, assuming he overcomes that issue.

With that done, Aizawa ‘Plus Extra™’ Shouta gets the whole class tense by drawing out the next class announcement. While I think it’s a translation error, the whole class sweating as they wonder whether it’s another brutal pop quiz is hella funny. (I’m guessing it was meant to be ‘test’ which would reference to the quirk assessment as well as the battle training, but ah well.) The whole class sighs in relief as one as Aizawa finally reveals that their task for the morning is to choose a class president - a normal, school-like thing in comparison to the past two days.

Pretty much the entire class has their hands raised to volunteer for the position, with Katsuki being particularly aggressive about it (as per the norm). Even Izuku has his hand shyly lifted up from the desk, while his narration notes that the position in normal schools entails mundane tasks, but in UA’s hero course means leading the group - a position suited for a top hero in the making.

Tenya calls for them all to quiet down, drawing attention as he goes on to explain how leading people is a task of heavy responsibility, but that ambition is not equal to ability. He is so intense it’s hilarious as he explains how the office demands the trust of its constituents, and that if it’s to be a democracy, then he puts forward the motion that they choose their leader through election.

Seriously this is just so fucking hilarious, I love this boy so much. And I love whoever it is that calls out that this is a classroom, not congress.

Tsuyu points out that the class hasn’t known each other long enough to build trust, and Kirishima notes that everyone will vote for themselves. Tenya points out that that is precisely the reason that anyone who gets multiple votes will be the best suited for the job. He then checks with Aizawa if this is allowable, which the teacher agrees to so long as it’s quick. And a quick transition, we reveal the winners-

Izuku with three votes, and Momo with two.

Everyone else, it seems, still has one vote, which was their own (as predicted). Izuku is shook. Katsuki is shaking in anger as he demands to know who the hell voted for Deku. Ochako is whistling and looking away, thinking that she’d better not let Katsuki find out.

(Also of note is that Sero is already approaching Katsuki and making a joke here about it being obvious Katsuki wasn’t one of Izuku’s votes, and then seemingly laughing a bit when Katsuki’s temper turns on him?

Hard to say for sure, but it seems Sero is the first of Katsuki’s future friend group to approach him and get away with poking at his temper. Which I feel is something very much overlooked by the fandom in favor of Kirishima for fairly obvious reasons.)

Tenya, meanwhile, is in a funk as he notes he has no votes, and that that is the harsh reality of office. Momo is concerned as she notes that zero votes meant he voted fro someone else, while Sato points out that Tenya was the one to suggest the election, so what did he seriously want? Izuku and Momo go to the front of the class - Izuku a nervous wreck while Momo’s just exasperated with the situation. Aizawa confirms their positions as he gets out of his sleeping bag, and the class talk a bout about the suitability of the chosen pair while Tenya continues to sulk in his seat.

With that, the first half of the chapter is done, so I’ll call it here. I can certainly say I learned a thing or two today, and I hope y’all did as well!

#readthrough #chapter 12 #usj arc #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #midoriya izuku #bakugou katsuki #Iida Tenya #aizawa shouta #good to be back #real life is a pain and a half #I would have worked on this yesterday #but the manga site broke #also more food for the sero baku friendship fans

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