#well fuck now I’m crying

[manygreetingsfriend]

i’m sooooooo normal about the god of war series. so incredibly normal i liked it a normal amount and would be so chill talking about it. don’t worry about the sign

#god of war #i’m so so so so so normal about it it’s so whatever it’s so haha you know #something something when it comes to yourself you’ll let yourself drown before you change. you’ll die before you change who you’ve become #to survive this long #up to and until it affects the ones you’ve come to love in this life you’ve made for yourself and you suddenly have no choice but to change #it’s fine it’s ok it’s chill. everyone does this. #it’s becoming a parent and loving your child so much you HAVE to change. you HAVE to be better #we MUST be better. than they were. #who’s they. our parents. the gods that come before us. yes. #i’m screaming i’m crying i’m wasting away im disintegrating. there’s no coming back there no return #you are on your knees. you are gripping your son’s shoulders like they’re the only thing keeping you tethered to the earth. #you are struggling with who you are and who you want to become. you are promising to be better. #i’m so normal about parent(al figures) taking responsibility for their actions and choosing to do better #i’m not high enough to really express what’s going on here. can you feel it? can you fucking feel it? #this series has destroyed me. #dad of boy. dad(s) of boy. i will never be the same (affectionate) #can’t remember the last time i finished a series and went ‘oh well i’ve GOT to play it again Now That I Know’ #AND I HAVENT EVEN TALKED ABOUT THE BROTHER HULDRA!!!!!!!!! #sindri’s face. has not left my memory #i’m dying scoob #gow #gowr

[justanotherdrfan]

Baby girl is thriving!! 🥺

#chapter 2 #i’m melting #f1 sunshine smile is well and truly back #i’m so happy i could cry #the difference in his outlook is night and day now #once a red bull boy always a red bull boy #red Bull gives you a happy Daniel and I’m here for it #he’s healing from the shitshow that was McLaren #the little digs at finally being listening to and waiting to cotinue to give feedback speaks volumes on the toxic culture over there #fuck mclaren #also Lawerence should always invite him because he genuinely chats with Daniel and you can tell Daniel is happy to be there #formula one #daniel ricciardo #dr3 #danny ric #f1 #formula 1 #vcarb #Youtube

[mossytrashcan]

sorry for the spam today lol, hoping to have this little ref sheet done by tomorrow so I can work on other designs for bigger pieces

#maybe some nikolai designs #cuz like okay confession I was obsessed w a darkolai fic exactly 1 year ago #and I’m pretty sure that’s what put me on the path to drawing this dude #cuz like I think about it a lot and I lost it and I’m anguished #if anyone knows the darkolai fic hmu I think it’s here on tumblr #it had a thing w mouths but it was so well written that I was like yeah I get the hype behind mouths now #I’ve been like waiting for someone to request darkolai art for a YEAR #I’m that desperate for an excuse to think about this fic #OH ALSO IT HAD A MOODBOARD #patrick ireland was like praying in white and crying and covered in blood #which like um why wasn’t that in the show #what the fuck #robbed

[mihrsuri]

I keep trying to write an update and then being embarrassed about it and feeling like I’m trauma dumping on people by updating and I just..I know it’s on me to manage my crap, I know. I am trying (not very well but I’m trying) and it’s just…I don’t know. I don’t even know.

#please know i have thought about hospital but hospital would #genuinely make it worse (like I cannot even tell you how much worse) #i think I’m legitimately just…having a trauma reaction on top #of a jewish trauma spike #and dentists and having to move (I may have cleaned till I shook today also my arm #does not look great #i feel like i don’t actually verbally have the words #(i have tried not engaging i have tried engaging they both feel awful) #(hashem i don’t know would you even embrace me would you…) #(it’s not a meds thing (I take meds for mdd and I know what that looks like and this isn’t it) #(it’s hard to explain the difference between CPTSD and like a panic attack or a depression) #(except that I feel like I’m so so tainted and not in my body or if I’m in my body I’m in my body somewhere else #abuse cw #i didn’t ask for this cptsd and no tshirt was offered #this will disappear probably #UGH #(i am seeing my therapist tomorrow i just..i know i need to reach out to) #(to like my current landlords and ask if I could just pay for a cleaning service to come in) #(i know i need to be like ‘unfortunately my CPTSD is Fucking Terrible Right Now and I need) #(just a bit of grace apologies) #(i do not want my parents to know i do not want that) #(aside from the fact that I am already a burden to them anyway) #a stupid flop of a person i am crying thinking about how i had plans for kids and a wife and travel and…I’m nothing #(everyone else is something I’m not I don’t deserve grace lbr) #it keeps running through my head how many people i thought loved me want me dead #and it’s like I can fake it so well #(i don’t know I may be like sending words to people) #to run through the steps of not being alone #i’m truly sorry i am always not taking accountability and playing the victim and clinging to people #to get reassurance i don’t deserve that its a good person it isn’t it isn’t a person

[soullessjack]

every so often I remember that some of jacks real canon nicknames given to him are sweetheart and darling boy and I just. Collapse. Utter anguish and torment. he’s literally their sweetheart darling boy. Do you get it do you even fucking care

#cal.txt #spn #supernatural #rowena macleod #jack kline #ouroboros #mary winchester #spn 14x17 #spn 14x13 #HES. #HES SWEETHEART :((((;; #HES DARLING BOY SWEETHEART. #god no fucking wonder he went insane over the idea of losing this . #he just wants to be their sweetheart darling boy again more than anything in the world #nobody touch me I’m sterile ! #god. #GOODDDDDDDDDD #I haven’t been well about this since it fucking aired Im so serious #Gooodddddddddddd I’m gonna go cry and puke now

[noirandchocolate]

Thermostat broke less than three years after it was installed. Just found out the warranty is only TWO years and it costs $850 to replace. :)

Recently I joked to people that somehow I managed to get through November-December without a major appliance or body part getting fucked up, for once.

Guess the universe was just running a little behind schedule!

#kidk says stuff #it is some bs that the unit costs that fucking much #it’s a ‘smart’ thing with an app and I did not ask for that when it was installed #it was just installed and I was told that’s what I got #so like. now im on the hook for all this $$$ to replace it?? #if this happens again conveniently just outside the warranty period imma…well idk!! #I am not crying though! very good at being only QUIETLY upset! I’m so good!

[aroace-poly-show]

hahahahahahah im sending this to you when you cant respond :P

anyways. concept. the FIREFLIES DUDE. the abandoned park with the fireflies,,,, that line. idk why but i couldnt stop thinking about the fireflies and. how wxs they are. specifically this sort of wxs. the ones who are thrust into so much darkness but still still find a way to find a light by making it themselves.

also hahaha rui silly bug guy

(i totally 100 percent guessed on the colors lol)

HOLY FUCKING SHIT I OWE YOU MY GODDAMN UFCKING LIFE FOR THIS YES YOU GET IT EXACTLY ANDAJSKGHFAUYIHSGVYFTEIYUHGFYTEGDYIUHJBHVGDFSJKDADFAYGYIUSHFDGHSJKF THROWS UP AND DIES ANJSAHDUIYTWR657ATSGYVFTYDUGDFUTTGUIYSUAGFDSHJOIHFDYHJFAKLSNFVDSHDIAIO

#asks #fave #hollow ☆ wonderland #the world needs to see this so i waited till i was free from post limit #i’m gonna throw up #they’re just. they’ve all been given so much shit but they go on and now with each other they live and they live and they fucking live #ueuueuewuueuwgeiugfydtgshjbdfda im gonna #this is everything to me #you get it exactly i’m so happy #i’m so happy i got my thoughst across well enough #joy #pure fucking joy #i’m gonna cry #OH YEAH do you mind if steal some of your color scheme for when/if i color in hw rui. 10/10 i fucking love it

[septxwber]

Why would you do THAT I-

#crying actual tears #I’m sorry but fuck that ending #to be fair I knew damn well what it was going to happen but decided to ignore the inevitable #so now I’m just an emotional wreck looking for a bit of mental stability #which something tells me ain’t gonna happen soon #the atlas complex #g thoughts

[simcardiac-arrested]

Needed a warm up, remembered how I saw this little guy for the first time and literally screamed

She is so ever to me, I think she should cause so many problems on purpose

i just opened tumblr and saw this and i am being so serious when i say this made my organs turn to mush and make me pace around the house for a good 3 minutes just to start having coherent thoughts

#but don’t be fooled i do NOTTT have coherent thoughts anymore because HUH ?!?! HUH ?!?!?!?!? C ?!?!?!!?!?! #⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ THERES JUST NO WAY THIS IS IN MY INBOX RIGHT NOW IM HALLUCINATING THIS BECAUSE OF THE 31 C HEAT SURELY #OH MY GODDDD #screaming at a brick wall HHHEEEELLP HELP MEEEEE SOMEBODY HHHEEEELEPPPPP GHEEELLPPPP #WHAT ARE YOU DOIGN TO ME #oh my god they look so fucking good in your style i dont even know what to say. i dont know. i need to give you money #THE POSES???? THEY ALL LOOK SO AWESOME SHE’S SUUUUCH A LITTLE EVIL BEAST DOING STRETCHIES #oh good gracious (falls on the ground and explodes) #i’m in love with how you drew her human form as well i need to ruffle her hair. quickly #the warning sign on her eye ueeeueuehgghhhshhh #literally what are you doing to me. whag are you doing to me #cramswering #is for me tag #oc: cognitive dissonance #adding tags with tears in my eyes #do you u even understand what you’ve done I HAVE MUSIC CLASS IN 15 MINUTES I SHOULD BE FOCUSING ON THAT #BUT INSTEAD I’LL BE THINKING ABOUT HOW U DREW CD FOR THE WHOLE HOUR. DO U UNDERSTAND #aueueghhhgg THANK YOU SO MUCH MAN i’m so honored you would draw my ocs as warmup ueeue #soungof crying

[floral-hex]

hi it’s my birthday tomorrow

#had to redo this since someone left a comment that bummed me out a lot #well… didn’t HAVE to but I didn’t like seeing the notification #guess I could have just deleted their comment… shit… didn’t think about that #hey uhhhh please don’t be mean to me about my birthday. I’m just a sad lil guy 🥺 #I already dislike my birthday. I hate feeling older. like I’m wasting my life. #it’s already usually an afterthought since it’s Christmas Eve #but with my mom’s surgery it’s even more of an afterthought and I’m so stressed and I have to take care of my bros and I’m just not great 😬 #like… what do I even want to do tomorrow? #I’d love to just sleep in and eat junk and maybe go see a movie #but I have to go drive 40 minutes to see my mom and if I try to cut the visit short I’ll just feel guilty #so… I guess I’m spending my birthday watching my mom shake and cry in pain 🤷🏻‍♂️ #which can be okay! I mean not okay but I can 100%… well… 85% live with that. it’s okay. it’s just a day. #but fuck does it hurt when people just ignore it or downplay it or make jokes about my birthday this year #people don’t have to care about my birthday. strangers online don’t have to care. it’s whatever. #and I’m not even mad at anyone in particular. I just… yeah.. I just can’t take negative jokes about it right now. #I’m trying not to be specific! I don’t want to be mean! nobody is being mean to me! it’s okay! #im just a sensitive baby that just wants people to be nice to him for the next 24 hours #…. I’m sad! #I think I’ll just be mean to everyone tomorrow #…. lol like I could do that. pfffttt I’ll bend over backwards for my family and I’ll be glad to do it. mostly. #it’ll be okay #days are 24 hours. I’m sure I can squeeze some good stuff in between the bad. that’s life babyyyy #and I love you and I appreciate you to no one in particular and I’m sorry I’m so sensitive #my mutuals are great #you’re all great. unless you aren’t. but we won’t talk about that. #ok you can ignore this #text

[ironhusband]

“Did you join a cult since we last saw you?” They ask, fully knowing the last time they were all together, they had their own cult.

#ok I get Nat’s and Shauna’s and Thai’s reaction to the idea #tai’s* #even tho that’s the exact reason I find it so bizarre that the therapy was most effective for them cause of that #but van and misty being like ‘Lottie who went to Switzerland for a psych ward is now leading a wellness center?!’ #BITCH THE LAST TIME LOTTIE WAS OFF HER MEDS YOU STARTED A NEW RELIGION AROUND HER. get off your fucking high horse #ramble rumble #anyways thank you tumblr I binge watched this show during a work week so now I’m operating on zero sleep and a reminder not to watch horror #before bed because I’m a little scared cry baby #yellowjackets #also the creepy fucking song is stuck in my head

[bricreative]

After two unsuccessful runs, third times the charm cuz I FINALLY MADE IT TO 500 DAYS

#I ended where I started so from Desolation Point to every fucking where else and then back #also I wish it wasn’t foggy by the time it hit 500 but ah well #I’m going to go cry and play other games now #but honestly what a great day and great week even #the long dark #Bri talks

[ocard-yoflam]

God, that episode was just …

This is why, this is fucking why The Last Of Us gets me every, every fucking time.

Whether it’s two minutes, or two days.

The time you’re given with those you care about is worth fighting for.

The bonds we make is what it means to live, it’s what makes us human and we should covet and treasure every goddamn second of it. Even if the end is inevitable. Even if it’s right around the corner.

You know how that made 16 year old me feel back in 2013? I am still feeling it.

God. 😭

#the last of us #the last of us hbo #episode 7 made me cry boys #tlou #Ellie Williams #Joel Miller #left behind #10 years now #it’s been 10 years and I’m still emotional #I feel feral when I think about it #fuck I just #the series is doing this sooooooo well

[bloodiedbeloveds]

no but actually we are so serious about bigender aggressively outdoorsy very southern john. someone else write this so we don’t have to

#he crossdresses his first time because he’s home for summer break and has told his family about his boyfriend #and patsy goes “if you’re gay now can i paint your nails” and he goes uh. about that. i’m kind of. well. #she puts him in a skirt & she sees herself in a mirror and starts crying #and patsy’s like oh fuck this was not the plan i do not know how to comfort my older brother (sister??) what is going on #john eventually collects herself and apologizes for getting emotional and she says. very awkwardly #”it’s fine i didn’t put eyeliner on you yet so it doesn’t matter” #john’s gonna be fine. he has a moment about it for a while but he grows into it during the rest of the summer #he neglects to tell alex about the gender stuff so there’s a while where he’s more open with his family than with his boyfriend #which feels like a bizarre joke. what world is he living in where his dad lets him wear a dress to dinner #but it’s nice! she’s doing okay #patsy will not let him borrow her clothes after the first time she gets potting soil on something. she gets very huffy and goes #“DAD we’re going to the MALL so my STUPID SISTER can’t RUIN MY THINGS ANYMORE” #and henry #with no idea how to break up Girl Fights #says “…be back for dinner” #(she forgives john like half an hour into buying him a new wardrobe)

[seventh-district]

it’s finally getting cold enough that i can bring my cardigan collection back into rotation without feeling like i’m gonna melt into a puddle the second i step outside!!!

#Seven.txt #my face #i have rematerialized back out of the void to once again make my once-in-a-blue-moon selfie & life update post #i’m running on 4 hours of restless sleep and the single banana i ate for lunch earlier today. let’s do this #hrrrrg i hate the lighting in my bathroom but i refuse to take pictures in the absolute Mental Illness Disaster Zone™️ that is my bedroom #anyways. got diagnosed with Mystery Pain Syndrome at the dentist today. so now i take ✨steroids✨ #the less funny explanation is that my tooth still hurts with pressure nearly a month post-root canal and That’s Not Good #so we’re trying some new medications to see if that fixes it. and if not then who knows. root canal pt.2 the sequel. or extraction. sigh #and so the Dental Saga continues. todays visit went quite well in spite of the unforeseen mystery pain delaying the tooth-shaving plans #we had some time to kill so he managed to fill some of my other tiny cavities while i was there today so that’s good #okay moving on. what else. uhh. OH they finally came out and ran the fiber to the house last week!!! now i’m just waiting on one more- #-guy to come and finish the interior install and the long awaited fast internet will finally be mine eheheheheeeee #now i can feel my hours upon hours of unedited gameplay footage breathing down my neck :) #man i’ve got so much stuff piled up right now. i’m drowning in Tasks and it’s a lil overwhelming but i’ll handle it all! eventually #uhhhhm my current writing project is coming along well! i’ve never put so much time and effort into a oneshot before in my life #its a labor of love though and i think i’m gonna be really proud of myself (and the fic) once it’s complete #even if no one reads it bc it’s so goddamn self indulgent and kinda lowkey throws canon out the window but like. fuck it! #if i want Astarion to write a song on piano and perform it for me while mentally taking me on a trip down memory lane. then so be it #fr though i’ve never written anything quite like this and i rlly want to do it justice. even if its unrealistic i still want it to be Good #in other news i received word that one of the chickens i sponsor at my local Gentle Barn has passed away so i had a lil cry abt that #i feel so bad for his little tiny chicken wife. they obviously loved each other and it’s like. so sad when one half of an old couple dies #like. she pulled him out of his depression after his 1st wife died. now who’s gonna be there to pull Her out… #anyways let’s not get all sad about that again. in happier news my cat who i presumed died/got killed has returned home uninjured!!! #after that huge stray dog chased her into the woods i thought we’d never find or see her again #but then the morning after i started grieving her she showed back up hungry as hell yet completely unharmed like the enigma that she is #so that’s one definite highlight from earlier this month. uhh what else. rapid fire summary of the past few weeks let’s go- #Jersey turned 10! Bullet turned 10! my 6 year Veganniversary happened! i’m approaching 700 days on DuoLingo! #i’ve written more than 20 thousand words! i’ve been facing some fears! fighting my OCD! taking care of myself! (kinda!) #anyways things are far from being all sunshine and roses around here but i’m trying to focus on the good stuff for the most part #for now tho i have a headache and have reached 30 tags so it’s time to go shovel some mashed potatoes into my mouth :)

[kaleighkarma]

I’m crying in the club over how much I love my friends

#fuck I love my friends #I’ve been feeling so loved lately #idk man something clicked in my brain and now I can’t stop crying over the fact that so many people think about me and want to love me #it’s crazy and so wonderful and also insane #but people really want to go out of their way to do things to make me smile on my birthday #and I just #I’m crying all day today I guess #hey 14 and 17 year old kaleigh #you have so many people who love you and choose to love you and have for years at this point #I’m genuenly so overwhelmed this year #I thought I was loved last year but wow #talking #well more like sobbing #anyways I’m going to go cry and look at all my friends now and cry some more #THEY MADE THINGS FOR ME #god I love my friends #also if you got this far I love you so much thanks for being my friend even a little