averagenolofinwean

[averagenolofinwean]

Finwe: Honey, would yo still love me if I was a worm?

Indis, without hesitating: No. Did you ask the same question to Miriel? Because then it would make much more sense why she chose to stay dead.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #finwe #indis #miriel #tolkien

[averagenolofinwean]

Finwe: Why are wombats called wombats? (...) Because that's where the womb's at!

Indis: Your jokes get worse every month. No wonder Miriel died, she died of laughter. Because she has a terrible humor.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #tolkien #finwe's daily dad joke #finwe #indis

[averagenolofinwean]

Fingon: I love you trees I love you undiscovered valleys that are yet to be adored I love you nice feeling that I have in my stomach whenever I see my husband I love you little cactus on my bedside table I love you dalmatian dog with a anxiety disorder who rooms with me. I love you world

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #fingon #Fingon's daily positivity beam

[averagenolofinwean]

Good question because I have no idea. I'm on mobile and my tumblr marks posts as mature sometimes without me wanting to. It's very weird. I'm gonna take away the community label manually now that you've mentioned it

Maedhros: Y'all are getting nothing out of me. Nothing!

Aredhel: I'll give you Fingon's number.

Maedhros: okay fine what the fuck do you want

[averagenolofinwean]

His paranoid father won't let Maedhros near Fingon without a 100 meter safety distance in fear Finno's gonna know all of Feanor's personal top secret information just by looking at Maedhros. Also Maedhros has a boyfriend who's a total asshole (Maedhros dates him because politics)

(And I kinda got confused with my incorrect quotes lore)

Maedhros: Y'all are getting nothing out of me. Nothing!

Aredhel: I'll give you Fingon's number.

Maedhros: okay fine what the fuck do you want

[averagenolofinwean]

Maedhros and Thingol in a Mystery Dungeon With Traps, "Magical Artifacts" and Useless Air Vents AU

Maedhros: Don't touch it.

Thingol: Why?

Maedhros: It'll explode.

Thingol: Oh, that makes sense. *glares at Maedhros* But you can't tell me what to do, because I am king. *pushes the button*

Maedhros: NO-

-----------------------------------------------------

Thingol: I miss my wife. I wish she was here, so she could comfort me.

Maedhros: I wish she was here so she could deal with your mess for us.

-----------------------------------------------------

Narrator: The heroes came closer and closer towards their destination, the peak of-

Maedhros: Who's close to orgasming?

Narrator: -peak of the dungeon, where the ancient amulet of Phar Amazon lies, one of the last remains of an old culture-

Maedhros: I'd like to emphasise that I do not support the british museum or condone any of their actions.

Narrator: and where they hope to escape the dungeons. The road ahead-

Maedhros: We are currently climbing up a cliff. For educational purposes, I am going to clarify: A road is not a cliff. There is no road ahead, only climbing.

Narrator: -is even more dangerous than before.

Maedhros: If you don't shut up and I won't get any food in the next hour, things are gonna get very dangerous for you.

Narrator: Will our heroes find their way home again or will they bite the dust and lie here in this dirty dungeon?

Maedhros: *groans dramatically* I just wanna go home to my husband.

*A few seconds later*

Maedhros: I don't have anything against biting and being dirty, though.

-----------------------------------------------------

Thingol: You know what, Noldo? You're not as bad as I thought you were. You're actually quiet nice.

Maedhros: Great for you. You are as ghastly and incompetent as I imagined you would be.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #maedhros #tolkien #thingol #Maedhros and Thingol in a Mystery Dungeon With Traps Magical Artifacts and Useless Air Vents AU

[averagenolofinwean]

Celegorm: Uhmm, atya and ammë, do you have a second? I'd like to introduce you to someone.

Nerdanel: Oh, do you have a partner?

Feanor: Or a new friend, perhaps?

Celegorm: No.

*Huan runs into the kitchen*

Celegorm, grinning like a maniac: A dog.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #tolkien #celegorm #nerdanel #feanor

[averagenolofinwean]

Finwe: I think something isn't alright with my kid.

Glorfindel: Oh, I'm terribly sorry. What's going on with him? What isn't alright? Does he eat, drink and sleep? Maybe go see a Maiar.

Finwe: No no no, there's nothing wrong with his physical health. He just called me ammë the other day and I realised that he'll grow up without a mother, and that he'll be different because of that from other children, and it made me tear up.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #finwe #glorfindel #tolkien

[averagenolofinwean]

Maedhros: Y'all are getting nothing out of me. Nothing!

Aredhel: I'll give you Fingon's number.

Maedhros: okay fine what the fuck do you want

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #maedhros #tolkien #aredhel #russingon

[averagenolofinwean]

Erestor, leaning over Celebrimbor's shoulder and staring at the latter's phone: You got games on your phone?

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #tolkien #erestor

[averagenolofinwean]

Finrod, three days after leaving Nargothrond with Beren and his 10 companions: *claps his hands together* Now who wants to do sloppy gay sex homie polyamory?

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #finrod #finrod felagund #beren erchamion #beren #finrod and his 10 companions

[averagenolofinwean]

Maglor, talking with Erestor, Elrond and a few other elves: One problem in Valinor with Maedhros always was that people were being touchy and grabby towards him, because he was like, one of the most beautiful Noldor in Valinor, or at least was he percified as that by society back then, so everyone knew him and he was kind of like a celebrity who was known for his beauty. And everytime he went out in public strangers would always try touch him or take pictures with him and sometimes they even flirted with him although he always had a boyfriend back then, and at some point he could not go without my father or someone else from our family out in public since he was always scared of being sexually assaulted. I think the only reason he never actually got assaulted, or at least to my knowledge, was that he was overly tall for a Noldo and the average noldorin or telerin elv was smaller than him. I know that being tall doesn't really protect you from being raped or touched without consent, but for him specifically it helped. The fact that people were being inappropriate towards him also made me - and I know this makes me sound like a dick - less jeaulous of his beauty, because I was jeaulous that people thought him prettier than me, and that I could try as much as I wanted and I'll never be famous for my beauty anyway. When he became famous and I noticed how disgusting some people treated him, I didn't want to be prettier than him anymore. Later on I became famous for my music of course, and then people were inappropriate towards me too, but I already knew how to handle inappropriate behaviour from my older brother's experiences with that, so I'm very grateful that he taught me how to behave and what to say in certain situations.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #long incorrect quotes post #maglor #tw mention of sexual assault and rape #cw inappropriate behaviour

[averagenolofinwean]

Maedhros: Doing it scared is better than not doing it at all.

Maglor: I feel like this sentence is not supposed to be used in this context.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #maedhros #maglor #tolkien

[averagenolofinwean]

Galadriel, to Celeborn: I went to Rivendell the other day, and guess what son of a smith I saw?

Celeborn: Who?

Galadriel, putting her head into her hands, two seconds away from breaking together: Maglor. I saw motherfucking Maglor. My half-cousin who literally fucking killed elves. In Rivendell. Elrond has been hiding him, a kinslayer, in Rivendell, the last homely house, safe haven for people who are exhausted from life, from me and you.

Celeborn:

Celeborn: Yeah sounds like something he'd do ngl

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #tolkien #galadriel #celeborn

[averagenolofinwean]

Elrond: Another day another elv or mortal doing something they'll regret because they didn't listen to my advice...

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #elrond #poor Elrond is the voice of reason no one listens to #he's kind of like Cassandra of troy. He always tells the truth but no one believes/listens to him #must be tiring #tolkien

[averagenolofinwean]

Elenwe: I think, what defines being elvish, is not our beauty, or our skills, but our understanding of being an elv as a community and society. We elves as a community define what being an elv is, and not the Valar. Elven society made these constructs up, about having long hair and being pretty, and that as an elv you must have a specific skill which you are incredibly good at; but these are social constructs that we made up and which we could change if we as a society wanted to. Some of these constructs are not actually correct in practice; not every elv has a pretty, symmetrical face, or is good at something. Some elves do not spend three hours in the morning thinking about their appearance and making themselves pretty for the public. Not all elves feel love and spend much time outside in nature. Some of the stereotypes and constructs of elven society can be harmful, and I think we as a community and society should try to change and be more open towards elves who don't fit these constructs.

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #elenwë #spreading my elenwë the poet and philosopher propaganda #long incorrect quotes post

[averagenolofinwean]

Maglor, arguing with his brothers: You guys should be thankful to Fingon for having such good rizz skills, or else Maedhros would already be yelling at you!

#incorrect quotes #incorrect silmarillion quotes #incorrect finwean quotes #maglor #russingon