brynhildr13

[brynhildr13]

UNDYING 🌘✨

I created this illustration in honor of Reita—the bassist of one of my favorite bands of all time—who sadly passed away a week ago. Being a fan of the GazettE for over 15 years now fills me with a pride I could never put into words. This band has been with me through my most difficult times and Reita has always been a source of comfort, excitement, tears, and laughter for me.

I feel so blessed that I had the opportunity to see them live in 2016, shake Reita’s and the rest of the members’ hands, and tell Reita how thankful I am for everything they’ve done for me face-to-face. Your memory will live on for an eternity, Reita 🩵 Fly high, our precious rocker. You’re the best bassist in the world and the GazettE, the imprint you’ve left on the rock community, and your spirit will never die 🤟🏻

#art #illustration #digital art #painting #the gazette #gazerock is not dead #reita #reita the gazette #visual kei #fucking awesome fanart that i love #spread the love and joy of his heart and soul.

[brynhildr13]

✮

#közi #yu~ki #malice mizer közi #malice mizer yu~ki #visual kei #malice mizer

[brynhildr13]

Reblog to give the person you reblogged from the ability to finish their WIPs

[brynhildr13]

to that anon and everyone else

@2goldendarkness pointed out @radiogazette to me where you will be able to find the translated radios once the blog is ready and sorted ♡

#the gazette #ruki #uruha #aoi #reita #kai #FUCKING. BBLLEEESSSS #i was looking for something like this!!!! thank you!!!!

[brynhildr13]

baby fever is the most foreign concept to me in the world. when i found out women don’t have to have children if they don’t want to i was like YAYYYY!!! I’M FREEEEE !!! ^_^ i was like 13 and i have never looked back…

[brynhildr13]

thank you reita ❤️

#fucking awesome fanart that i love #so cute! what a nice tribute! #reita #the gazette #stay strong with us. thank you.

[brynhildr13]

I started putting together some of my favourite Reita photos and gifs last night but I was all over the place and wanted to focus on writing my other post. But when it's not from a live, some of my favourite pics are ones taken with the other members. 💔

#the gazette #reita #we love you buddy. and we miss you. #uruha #aoi #ruki #kai

[brynhildr13]

Me and the GazettE. I never realized how little I talked about it because I thought id be seen differently. And I even think the feelings suppressed. But no. They're still there.

id rather you have cringy but honest interests than try and act like everything youve ever loved was in an ironic way cause you think that love for simple or useless or silly things is beneath you . pathetic! embrace existence with both hands coward

#brynhildr babbles

[brynhildr13]

thank you for constantly keeping Uruha on his toes♡

#let the hilarity unfold #lets keep laughing with them all #the gazette #reita #uruha

[brynhildr13]

the GazettE 20th ANNIVERSARY -HERESY- (WOWOWライブ 2022.08.11)

#that smile is so important #reita #the gazette #uruha #20th anniversary #we love you so much and miss you.

[brynhildr13]

the GazettE World Tour 2013 documentary - Kai and Uruha go to the ruins of Teotihuacán

#i needed this laugh #let the hilarity unfold #the gazette #uruha #kai

[brynhildr13]

Thank you for the great music. Will keep listening to Silly God Disco with a smile on my face.

#beautiful piece! #fucking awesome fanart that i love #reita #the gazette #youre still with us no matter what

[brynhildr13]

#let the hilarity unfold

[brynhildr13]

He is and he will be. We'll make sure of it. 🩶

Eternal

#the gazette #reita #visual kei #digital art #fan art #artists on tumblr #fucking awesome fanart that i love #what a beautiful piece!

[brynhildr13]

About the GazettE.

TL;DR I had recent experiences that reinforce my belief that Reita REALLY is still with me and with all of us. Even if they can be easily explained as coincidental. Please if you want, share something that has been helpful to heal. Take care. Gazerock is not dead. Gazerock never dies.

Full post under cut.

I consider myself spiritual, but not really religious. But let me take you through my last few days, if you so care. Its important to me and I want to share this in hopes that the others in this Fandom know that I share the pain and want to spread my own love and solace and peaceful mourning.

I took an hour drive to my twin sister's to have our birthday hangout on Wednesday. I had the GazettE on plus other vkei groups on shuffle, but I kept skipping most of the other groups trying to find the GazettE songs. A few came on and even with the heavy and rock and headbanging songs I was just sobbing. To the point where I told myself, "you have to keep your eyes open. You need to watch the road." But the TEARS were plenty and heavy. I also started to judge myself a little. Wondering why I was SO emotional.

Then I had one of those intuitive downloads where like, you know it didn't come from your own brain and then after you hear it your mind expands. I don't know who's voice it was. I couldn't repeat it if I tried. But it said, quote "but feeling is healing."

And I lost it all over. Because I knew it was right and I needed to sit with the feelings. So I let myself cry as much as I could.

And then, To Dazzling Darkness came on.

My favorite song. Well, one of them. The whole Beautiful Deformity album is iconic, but that song specifically is one of my favorites BECAUSE of Reita's bass part. (Plus my twin sister, with her music degree, thinks the song is well written and can back up why and that means a lot to me that my sister who isn't the most into heavy metal or knows the group near as well as I do likes THEIR songs BECAUSE they're good).

And after that I laughed a little and wiped my eyes and said, "ok. I get it. It has to mean you're here right now. Thank you."

Maybe it came from Reita. I'd like to think so.

Had tons of fun with my sister. Come home. Worked Thursday. That night i shed a tear or two as i watched a few music videos in bed. And i just said outloud and in my head. "As long as he's okay. I'd like a sign that he's okay, please." And i fell asleep. Fast forward to today.

Today's our birthday. I planned to grab my free trenta from Starbies cuz $0 is the only amount I'll pay there unless I'm desperate. When I got to the screen in the drive thru, i meant to order 2 cake pops for my treat. Cuz fuck it. Im desperate. I'm a sad bitch and I want cake. It's my birthday. But I have anxiety and panicked and ended up asking for them at the drive thru window instead.

And they gave me the pops and I waited to hand them my card and after a few seconds she came back up and said, "oh don't worry about them today. No charge." Once I was sure they didn't want my money I thanked them profusely.

And I drove away. And I smiled from inside. Cuz I'd like to think that that was my sign he's okay. Maybe he pulled some strings to make me smile and to say, with that grin on his face, "don't worry about me. I'm here. I'll be here. Have a cake pop you sad bitch."

I meant it when I said before his spirit is here.. there's truly a feeling of the hole in my heart filling a little. I feel like emotionally and spiritually he's here in my peripheral stronger than ever before. Especially because I had become more of a backseat fan that would slink out of the woodwork when they had new content. My "obsession" (hyperfixation) died down a lot after saw them in 2016 and 2019, and I shared my gift of art and they shared their gift of music. But that love and adoration never ever left regardless of how often I talked about it and showed it. Or didn't. Cuz NO ONE else in my every day immediate circle knows anything about them.

Cuz here's the thing, and this is just me, too. I don't have any better way or words to string together to say this other than this way. I KNOW that they don't "know me". Like , I'm not missing the physical presence like they are. I didn't sit with him every day talking about all the most common shared passionate things we're doing, etc. Etc. So I can argue for myself that because of that the burden is likely to not be as heavy as any of theirs. But music and the arts connects hearts and minds beyond the physical. And for me listening to the music keeps him close, and I almost think that I can Feel him when I hear it. I can imagine him putting a hand on my shoulder (with his endearingly weird thumbs, they always made me giggle.)

Idk I think Im getting a little off track. Long story short, he was physically here with me when he was at the shows. When he wasn't he was still there, off across the world, doing his thing. and while I knew that like in an unconscious way, i never really sat with that to be like "what are they doing right this moment" or that i could energetically feel them all at any time, you know? And I remember getting upset with myself cuz my first coherent thought after I metaphorically picked my stomach off the ground after it fell out of my butt was "well, it HAS to be ok cuz the world's still gonna turn." And that felt horrible to say. And that's not fair to me or to anyone who needs time to process this. I mean, YA, I GUESS, it WILL. But once again. This WILL still hurt for a while. And that's okay. That doesn't mean i have to "get over" it right away either. Cuz once again. The physical loss isn't felt (yet) or as heavy as the bandmen will feel. But I will feel. And my feelings are my truth. And i can argue the band itself will have worse grieving till the sun dies, and that still doesn't mean my feelings are literally less than for my own personal experience. And thats okay.

But getting back to the point of this, thinking and believing Reita's making his way to us, I now just have this new vibration around me that I know is spiritual in nature and it is energizing the room, especially when I play their music. He's here.

I keep thinking about The Haunting of Hill House and Nell's words in the last episode. And I don't want that to ever fade. I'm determined to keep him strong in my heart and my mind. Just like ruki said he and the guys would.

Anyways, I hope yall are feeling as okay as you can. I hope this may touch someone and bring more healing. Free to share things in the comments if you want, too.

#the gazette #reita #visual kei #he's still here and he always will be. #gazerock is not dead #gazerock never dies

[brynhildr13]

生きた証が消えぬように...

#fucking awesome fanart that i love #the gazette #reita #dont worry bud. we'll keep you in love and joy where you belong.

[brynhildr13]

#the gazette #reita #undying #dogmatic era #one of my favorite hairstyles look at the MOVEMENT.