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bysaber · 2 months

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The Big Bad Wolf

Part XV

Word Count: 2,995

Warnings: canon violence

Note: Happy Valentine's day! :) I couldn't work today, so I pumped this ol' thing out.

The press of your soft lips lingered against Obito’s skin. It was welcomed at first, and it should have left him on cloud nine for hours afterward, but his mind could never let him soar so high.

His mind only steered his thoughts to the last kiss he had received before your’s. A flash of red, a bright smile; his memory was of Kushina pressing a kiss to the apple of his cheek. She was congratulating him for making chunin. She stepped backward into the waiting embrace of Minato-Sensei, and the two of them proudly grinned down at his little eleven-year old self.

He remembered the sense of pride and accomplishment filling his chest. He remembered the feeling of warmth and belonging as he looked up at their happy faces. That feeling was washed away by the swirling image of Kushina screaming in pain and horror as he extracted the Nine Tails from her stomach.

He tried to push it away, to escape the haunting image and chase those smiling faces, but all he could see was her tired, vulnerable state. She opened her mouth in his vision, and his ears rang with the sound of her pained screams.

A wave of nausea washed over him. Her screaming reverberated in his eardrums as he stumbled to the side of the path and fell to his knees. His guilt manifested itself in sudden, violent heaving.

“Obito?” Your alarmed voice barely reached his hunched over form.

Everything he had just eaten came up, burning his throat with every heave. He could hardly get a breath in; almost didn’t register your hand delicately coming to rest on his upper back as you silently supported him from behind. Your concern only made his guilt worsen, and his gasping for air intensified. He wanted to push you away, but all he could do was empty his stomach onto the frozen ground in front of him.

…

He refused to speak after that incident. He only wiped himself off with shaking hands and continued walking like nothing had happened. It wasn’t like he could explain himself to you; he was sure your look of horror would have matched his memory of Kushina’s.

You took the lead, periodically checking behind you to gauge his emotions. For a long while, silent tears streamed down his reddened cheeks. Eventually, though, the tears ended and he was only left with puffy red eyes.

You walked well into the night, silent except for the sound of your footsteps on the rocky path. It wasn’t snowy here, between the tall, rolling hills, so you kicked bits of gravel along the way just to fill the air with something other than your companion’s quietude.

His refusal to speak bothered you almost as much as his tears. It left your mind to run itself in circles. He wasn’t necessarily acting coldly, but he was withdrawn. What bothered you most is that you didn’t have a clue what happened, and couldn’t pinpoint an exact moment where something went wrong.

Under the light provided by the crescent moon, you spotted a cluster of trees. It was a small wooded area, but it would provide more cover that the long grasses for the night. You veered off the path and found a spot in the trees where a sliver of moonlight illuminated the ground between the branches. It was just enough to be workable, and you used it to start setting up the tent.

“Fire?” Obito croaked in his unused voice.

“Not tonight,”

You allowed him to help you raise the tent and stake the corners into the ground. You crawled in with both of your packs as he was finishing with the last one. You set your things up exactly how they had been the previous night, not allowing Obito the chance to distance himself further from you.

He entered and zipped up the tent flap behind him, turning to eye the conjoined sleeping bags dubiously. He was slow to approach as you crawled into it, a few words on the tip of his tongue, all of which refused to make it past his lips.

He slipped in beside you after shedding his outer layers, still lost in thought. He was only returned to the present by your gentle touch against his shoulder preventing him from turning onto his side to face away from you.

“Hey,” you said softly, the tone tickling his ears.

He met your worried eyes fully with his tired red ones. You brought your hand up to cup the scarred side of his handsome face, your thumb resting beneath his puffy eye. You brushed your thumb across his skin and he gulped, averting his eyes from the intensity behind your gaze. He didn’t know why he was letting you treat him so delicately when he vehemently felt he didn’t deserve it.

“Did I do something wrong?” You made yourself sound small, knowing that if he was faced with how upset you were, you were more likely to get a real answer from him.

“No,” his abrupt tone cut through the still air of the tent.

A low sigh escaped his lips. “You didn’t do anything wrong, it’s just.. Me,”

Your brows furrowed and you swiped your thumb soothingly across his cheekbone, his weight resting in your palm. “Why are you so upset with yourself?”

His eyelids fluttered shut and he inhaled deeply. He willed himself to stay calm and not let another tear escape, if he had any left, at your tender treatment. Instead of choosing the real reason his mind had been plagued the last few hours, he led with what his first concern had been.

“I… scared you, earlier,” he admitted defeatedly.

You blinked in surprise. The movement of your thumb momentarily ceased and you considered him with your bottom lip tucked between your teeth. Hesitantly, you replied, “You did,”

“But, that doesn’t mean I’m afraid of you, if that’s what you’re concerned about,”

He placed his hand over your wrist, and the silver chain suppressing his chakra peeked out beneath his long-sleeve. He studied for a moment and vice versa. You weren’t dumb, you were well aware that was only a fragment of the problem. If it had been the main issue, he would have been upset before the two of you dug into your lunches. You guessed that he had some thought that made him spiral, and that was the real issue at hand.

“You’re too trusting,” he said in a scolding manner.

“Is that so?”

He let out a short, self-deprecating laugh. “I could easily hurt you, y’know?”

You traced down the bridge of his nose with the thumb that had been stroking his cheek. And, with your heart beating irregularly, boldly swiped it across his bottom lip. You watched him shiver as his eyes bore into yours. You traced upwards again, along one of his scars before resting once again beneath his eye.

“You would never purposefully hurt me, Obito,”

Your trust and unwavering faith in him were clear as crystal in your even tone; leaving no room for argument. It cut him right through his core and left a ringing in his ears.

“How do you know?” He asked shakily.

“Because, the Obito I know doesn’t have it in him to,”

You looked at him squarely, your voice low and full of conviction. “The version of you that was capable of cruelty exists as no more than a memory, now,”

Obito could only let his jaw slacken, openly staring at you as he tried to process your words, his heart thundering in his chest. You watched as miniscule expression changes flickered across his face. After a while, he gently pulled your hand from his face and placed it next to your side.

“Thank you,”

He laid on his back and you mirrored his movements. Your shoulders touched beneath the covers and the two of you stared at the roof of the tent. Eventually, you grabbed your flashlight and flicked it off.

“Get some rest. You’ll need your energy for tomorrow,”

He hummed, and you prayed into the darkness that he would follow your direction.

…

You guiltily woke him between bouts of soft snoring before the sun had even had a chance to rise the next morning. You were too restless to wait any longer, and wanted to make it not long after the sun rose.

Obito groggily got himself up and was little help with deconstructing the tent. Evan as you started back on the trail he lagged behind, which was impressive considering how much longer his legs were than yours. It took a full half hour for him to wake up enough to keep pace with you.

“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” you teased when he finally fell into step beside you.

“Morning,” he grumbled.

“You know, while you were sleeping I was thinking…” you trailed off.

He glanced down at you. “About?”

“Well, I was wondering if you were going to let your clan die with you,” you mused quietly.

Obito stopped in his tracks. “What?”

“You’re the last one. Are you going to let the clan die out?” You continued walking, knowing he would catch up shortly.

“I’m not the last one, Sasuke is alive, too,” he replied in a low tone when he returned to your side.

You raised a brow and then chuckled. “Considering he and Naruto are getting married next year, I’d say he doesn’t really count,”

“He and.. What? Since when? I mean, we all saw it comin’ but..”

“A couple months after the war. Naruto didn’t tell you?”

“No, not at all,” he replied grumpily.

“Huh, the kid is shouting about his love constantly, that really surprises me,”

Obito didn’t respond. You glanced over and caught a hint of a pout on his lips.

“So, you didn’t answer my question,”

He grunted. “Whether I want to or not doesn’t matter. Who’s going to willingly have my children?”

“You’d be surprised,” you pressed on. “I mean, your genetic ability is impressive. I’m sure plenty of people would be more than happy to get a slice of that,”

He scoffed. “I think you’re forgetting something,”

“What?”

“I would have to.. Y’know… impregnate someone,” He winced at his own wording.

You giggled. “Y’make a little bit of unprotected sex sound like a bad thing. Has it really been that long for you?” You asked, genuinely curious.

“That long?”

“Since you had sex,”

Obito’s walking turned oddly stiff and he refused to meet your gaze when you looked over at him. He answered you under his breath so you couldn’t hear it.

“Huh?” You inched closer to hear him better.

He cleared his throat. “I haven’t,”

You looked at him with obvious shock. “You haven’t had sex?”

He shot you a glare and shook his head in confirmation. He turned his vision firmly to the gravel beneath his feet. You certainly weren’t expecting that. He was a powerful, handsome man; if you had entertained the idea of sleeping with him, other people certainly had to.

You remained quiet as you considered his words. Maybe he was asexual? Or was he saving himself for marriage? It had to be a purposeful avoidance on his part, that you were sure of. You thought of your own sexual life as a side note, and landed on the idea that maybe you should have waited for marriage, too, if that was his case.

“You think I’m a loser,” Obito stated.

You whipped your head around to look at his side profile. “No, not at all. Well, I think you’re a loser for other reasons -” You grinned and saw the corner of his lip twitch up. “I was just wondering.. How?”

He huffed out a dramatic sigh. “Between living in a cave, impersonating someone else for all of my interactions with other people, wearing a mask, and losing my first love, and acting out Madara’s evil plan, I just didn’t have the time or want,”

You hummed. “Yeah, that’ll keep you tied up, for sure,”

You actually hated the little niggling in the back of your mind that was excitement and intrigue. You hadn’t considered yourself someone with a corruption kink, but the image your mind conjured would certainly be considered something along those lines. You set that aside and made note of the part about lost love, which you remembered as somethin Kakashi had told you about.

“I’m not judging you for it, just so you know,”

He opened his mouth and closed it, opting to drop the conversation while you were giving him an out. A comfortable silence fell over the two of you as you continued on through the darkness.

…

At about an hour or two outside of your destination, the weak winter sun began its ascent in the sky. The severity of the situation resettled onto your shoulders in increments equal to the path of the rising sun. The town of Bacial came into view shortly after the first rays of light dusted the long, tan, dormant grasses of the surrounding hills. It was bigger than you remembered, the buildings rising higher in the sky and more than one main road now visible leading out of the town. Hina’s aunt lived in the more rural, southern outskirts, where you two were coming in from, and you hoped there hadn’t been significant changes to the street or population in that area.

A strange sense of relief and apprehension mingled in your gut, causing hot and cold flashes across your body and sweat to spring up under your arms. Your pace increased.

You and Obito made small talk now that you were closer so that you were distracted from the increasing pressure you felt on your shoulders. The town loomed larger and time slowed so that seconds felt like minutes, and the rest of your walk was torturously slow right up until you were at the outskirts of town. You tried to appear calm and collected as you attempted recalling exactly how to get to the house. You wracked your brain for memories of what it looked like, and could only come up with a red roof and the first two numbers on the house: twelve.

You reached out and took Obito’s hand, just as you had when you reached the last town. You told him what you remembered and the two of you were on the search.

You led him down a few vaguely familiar streets, trying not to seem too lost. You recalled when you and Hina were just little girls, and you had been forced to memorize the street names because Hina kept getting the two of you lost, and kids that were late coming home for dinner didn’t get to have dessert. You smiled at the memory.

Instinctively, you turned right at the next intersection, and at the end of the street you spotted a small yellow house with a red roof. It took every bit of self restraint you had not to break into a sprint.

As you continued, Obito made sure to hold you back when your pace started to get a little too quick. Rationally, you wanted to thank him, but emotionally, well, you didn’t have very kind words for him. Only when you had approached the short front gate did he let go of you.

It was only waist-height, so you easily hopped it and ran through the overgrown grass to the front door, only briefly checking to see that the house number matched your memory. You banged your fist against the door, much more frantically than you had wanted to sound. It opened a moment later to a confused graying woman who you recognized despite the many years that had worn down her features.

“Aunt Daina, so good to see you! Do you remember me?”

A crashing noise sounded from somewhere in the house, and a very pregnant Hina came waddling as fast as she could to the door. She cried, “Y/n!”

She nearly pushed her aunt down coming over to hug you. You embraced her awkwardly, trying your best not to squish her belly. Aunt Daina watched the whole interaction with confusion. You let go of Hina and gently pushed her back into the house so that you and Obito could shut the door behind you.

Hina clung to your arm. With wide eyes and a trembling voice, she said, “Thank the heavens you’re here,”

Tears fell from her already bloodshot eyes. Deep purple hung beneath them, and as you took a closer look, you realized she likely hadn’t slept or showered since you had spoken to her over the phone. Her long black hair hung in a ratty mess down her back and around her face, like she had been twisting and pulling it without stopping.

You shushed her. “It’s okay, I’m here now. Just like I promised you,”

You two embraced once more, and you heard her aunt start asking Obito who you were, while treating him like a long time friend and patting his back. In Hina’s ear, you asked, “Have you showered?”

She shook her head. “Okay, we need to do that now. I can’t have you traveling and looking like this. It’ll look like we kidnapped you or something,”

She nodded and you led her to the bathroom. You helped her undress and step over the lip of the tub. “Do you have your things packed?”

“Yes, two bags. They’re in the living room, next to the couch,” She sniffled.

You sighed out in relief. “Perfect,”

You shut the shower curtain. “I’m going to-”

“Don’t leave! Please, can you just sit on the toilet and talk to me? I don’t want to be alone,” She begged, poking her head out of the shower..

Your heart could have snapped in two at the way her usually happy green eyes looked wild with desperation. With a soothing voice, you said, “Of course, I’ll stay,”

Tag List: @mostlyunsure, @humongousdreamlandbear, @ichaichahatake, @mandy-yeager, @detectivestucks

#saber reads #saber reads naruto #s.fav

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bysaber · 2 months

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We Can Switch Off

CHAPTER SUMMARY : yuuji is officially leaving for his three month long trip, and two of your acquiantances fight over who gets to take care of you in his absence

WARNINGS : 18+, long distance relationship, slight intimidation and name calling, relationship pressure, family difficulties.

WORDS : 4.7k

notes : the only consistency on this blog is how inconsistent i am with posting wusyaname LMAO

LAST CHAPTER┊MASTERLIST ┊ NEXT CHAPTER

This is it. Today’s the day.

He’s leaving you.

You've been bawling since you woke up. You feel guilty, you do, because you want to be strong for Yuuji. But you can't. Three months without him is going to be near impossible, he’s your everything, after all.

It's hard for him, too. He doesn’t want to cry and make it a million times worse; but he's hanging on by a skinny and frayed thread.

Watching him load his luggage into Gojo's car made your tears flow at an accelerated pace.

Yuuji sat in the backseat with you rather that in the passenger seat with Gojo, and it made your heart wrench all the more. Trying to let him go in the airport is the hardest thing you've ever had to do.

He's just as devastated as you are.

And he hates that he has to leave you because of his fucking scholarship. There’s one thing he knows for sure…

He’ll never forgive himself if Fushiguro does something while he’s away.

You sit up front with Gojo as he drives you back home. He’s sweet, you think, although you’ve heard he has an irritating cocky side to him at times; he’s being sweet for the time being. He doesn’t mind that you’re still sniffling.

Yuuji is gone… He’s officially gone.

Silent tears have replaced your inconsolable blubbering. You know you’ll see him soon, but for now, it hurts. You feel like you’re dying. But that’s just it, it’s how you feel. And right now, in this moment, your brain can do nothing but replay the way he held you close before leaving. The few singular tears that you felt seep into your hair. The endless forehead kisses and the way he whispered ‘I love you’ so quietly that only you could hear.

It's like a movie you're being chained up and forced to observe. So, as much as you want to cease the flow of tears, it's an impossibility.

“I’ll leave my number for you,” Gojo speaks, breaking the natural silence between you both. “you know, in case you need anything.”

You wipe the tears on your cheeks with the back of your hands with little care, still feeling the damp smeared across your face. Your under-eyes, however, you take much more care to wipe gently with the pads of your fingers.

It’s the first time you’ve looked at yourself today. It’s been odd to see your face as bare as it is now for many days in a row. It isn’t you, but it is, really. It’s a reminder of how pathetic you really are. You’ve become too dependent on Yuuji and you’ve bent yourself to his every will just to please him, which you don’t mind, though you can’t deny it’s pathetic.

But he does it all for you, anything you want. Everything you want. Fuck. How are you going to handle being without him? The dark bags under your eyes are screaming at you with everything they have. There are three men in your life who call you princess with different intent behind the word, and yet somehow they’re all right. You are a princess, you need to be taken care of.

And now, you’re alone.

Maybe you should use this alone time to gain some semblance of independence.

“I know Yuuji told you to keep an eye on me while he’s gone.” you speak, it’s monotone and unbothered. You don’t care that Yuuji asked that of his friend and you don’t care that Gojo obeyed his order. If that’s what Yuuji thinks is best, fine. It’ll give him peace of mind, at the very least, to know at least someone has your back.

“You’re right about that,” he smiles, continuing to drive casually as if he’s been doing it since the day he was born, “but I wouldn’t offer unless I wanted to.”

Sweet. Satoru Gojo is sweet.

So, you smile. And you nod. And you tell him that you’re thankful and appreciate his kindness. Because that is the polite thing to do, yes, but it’s also the truth.

He parks outside of your home. You want nothing more than to be alone. All you want to do is cry in the privacy of your own home. And yet, when Gojo offers to come in, you don’t deny him.

Immediately he pulls out a pen and finds something to scribble his number onto. Urging you to keep it safe. Your stoic expression turns into a smirk with an amused raise of one eyebrow. You extract your phone from your pocket and save his number among your contacts. He chuckles at that.

The simplicity of youth.

“I don’t just mean errands or other tedious shit though, sweetheart.” he begins, picking up the earlier conversation in the car as he makes himself comfortable. “If you’re missing him, call me. If you want some company or just a friendly ear, call me.” he insists. You nod from the kitchen as you prepare coffee for both of you. It’s been a long morning, and you certainly need a pick me up.

“You’re nothing like Yuuji said you are.” you tease, settling the drinks down on top of the coffee table. Gojo rolls his eyes, he’s sure he knows exactly how Yuuji said he is. But he doesn’t argue with you about it.

It’s nice.

Being with Gojo is nice, because it’s rare you’re in the company of someone who appreciates Yuuji as much as you do. It’s been a crushing blow to realise that you have less friends in your life than you thought you did, the amount now totalling at zero.

Your classes are going to be hell, because while it’s true you have no friends, at least you had an escort in the form of your pink-haired lover who always made you feel like the world was at your feet. He’d never let you be alone… not until now, at least.

“Yuuji left his car, he told me you know how to drive. Is that true?” Gojo questions, it’s almost like an accusation, although you’re sure there’s no malice behind it. You nod your head, you do have a license.

“I know how, but I’m rusty. Yuuji drives me everywhere, these days. I’m a little nervous to be driving again actually… I’ve lost my confidence.” you explain before blowing on your steaming cup of coffee. You’re desperate for a sip. You need a caffeine injection to make the rest of the day bearable. It confuses you when Gojo begins to shake his head at your comment.

“I’ll drive you,”

“But—”

“It’s fine. I have no plans tomorrow so I’m happy to.”

You find it odd that somebody you barely know seems to want to help make your life easier in any way that they can. It’s also comforting. You’re already lost without Yuuji; and yet it’s almost a relief to have Gojo try and fill his shoes in the mundane sense.

It’s a weight off your shoulders knowing you don’t have to stress yourself sick worrying about your driving skills, or lack there of. Even if it is only for one day. With the devastation of Yuuji being out of your life for three months, everything feels incredibly delicate.

With a tender heart so raw you think it might be bleeding, you worry what a menace you could be to other drivers.

“Thank you, Gojo.” you nod, accepting his incredibly kind offer.

He comments on your appearance the minute you step foot inside of his car. The first time you met him you were covered in paint, pee and your own sick. And the second time was yesterday, bare faced and tear stricken. It was almost like you were mourning your boyfriend’s death. But today, he can’t help but compliment you on how well you’ve scrubbed up for class.

You’re still hurting, of course, but you decide to prematurely end your pity party. You’ve been feeling sorry for yourself time and time again in recent weeks, and though it’s likely that you will again, you have made the decision to end it today.

The drive is casual, asking each other how you slept and what you got up to after Gojo left. He already knows that you’re lying as soon as words start tumbling rapidly out of your mouth. You suspected that he’d ask that question, so you prepared a lie.

He knew though, because what else were you going to do other than curl under your duvet and cry? It’s not something he’d hold against you, it’s very apparent to him that you’re deeply in love with your boyfriend. And maybe you’re a bit more of a baby than you’d care to admit.

He leaves you with a wave. And he doesn’t fail to mention that he’ll be here to pick you up right on time. You smile widely as you watch him speed away, he must have lied to you too.

It seems he did have plans today after all.

The thumping in your chest might just be the loudest sound in the room as you enter your class. They’re here. They’re all here. And early, at that. The girls eye you up, looking a particularly irritated when they notice how good you look for the first time in a while.

Megumi pays you no mind, though. He seems to be keeping his word, staying clear and leaving you alone. For the most part, anyway, you’re sure if you give him enough time, he’ll find an excuse to pester you.

At least he seems to have toned down his usual brand of bullying.

It is becoming tiresome that everyone seems to look at you with sympathetic, pitiful gazes. You didn’t think you’d mind it so much that everyone knew about the incident at the club, but you didn’t think the poor victim glances would still be ongoing.

It’s not lost on you that your professor seems disappointed in your progress, too. Everything is becoming too much. Hell would freeze over before you took your teachers advice and allowed Megumi to help you with your work. Your eyes feel pain, the type of vibrating pain you feel when you know you’re about to cry. You said you wouldn’t do this. But now, looking through the pages of your pathetic sketchbook, you feel… empty. There isn’t a single feeling of love or pride as you look at your work. It isn’t you, not anymore. It isn’t yours.

You’re a fraud, you suppose.

You stand to leave; you can’t cry again today and not in front of these people. If the one last shred of control over your life is to no longer give your classmates fuel to feel anymore pity or joy at your expense, you’ll be damned if you don’t take it. Your chair scraping across the floor gains the attention of everyone in the room, but before you can leave your professor turns to face you.

“Please sit down, there’s something I want to tell you all before anyone tries running away early.” he sighs.

It’s humiliating. You weren’t ‘running away’ at all. All you wanted was five minutes. Five fucking minutes to get some air, get some solitude and focus your energy on holding in your tears. Except apparently that’s more than too much to ask right now.

“I wasn’t, I just—”

“I’ve arranged a trip for us all out of town, and it’s mandatory.” he interrupts, not bothering to wait until you’ve settled back down into your seat.

This is it. Everything is crumbling around you. How the fuck are you going to survive an entire day out of town with these people? You won’t, you can’t. Everything else he said after that initial sentence is being tuned out. The only thing running through your mind is how to get out of it. A fake death in the family? A doctors appointment? Maybe your parents would provide a good excuse. No, none of it was good enough. It’s mandatory.

You have to do this.

And you’re going to have to do it alone.

“Didn’t get much work done today, O’Keeffe.” Megumi taunts as he sways by you, eager to flee the classroom at the end of the day. He doesn’t give you a chance to respond, by the time your lips fall open to object to the nickname he’s already ten paces ahead of you.

You did it. You made it to the end of the day without bursting into tears. And you did it without Yuuji. You’re sure he’d be proud, hell, you’re proud of yourself. Maybe you’ll reward yourself with a shopping spree, that usually takes the edge off. Even if it is often just a momentary relief.

It’s funny, when you step into the parking lot and see Megumi still waiting there. He was so keen to rush away and get out ahead of you. But now, you’re almost standing by his side as you wait for Gojo. His flickering gaze doesn’t go unnoticed.

He’s getting predictable, he can’t seem to help himself when you’re around. And it makes you wonder if he’s holding back on you because Toji told him to, or because of the kiss.

Megumi’s eyes squint as Gojo’s car turns into a space, it’s like he recognises it. He does. Your boyfriend isn’t the only one who has a friendship with him, it seems. Gojo doesn’t bother getting out of the car; but he does wave at Megumi. He doesn’t want to hold back anymore, this has given him the perfect excuse to talk to you.

“You know him?” Megumi wonders. You nod, what else is there to say? You aren’t friends and you don’t want to talk to him. If you were smart, you wouldn’t have even given him the effort it took you to nod. It's clear that you’re too nice for your own good.

A scream rips from your chest as an all too familiar car zips by you, almost knocking you on your ass from the breeze it gives off alone. Megumi can do nought but smirk. And that catches your attention. He’s mocking you, but what’s new? It’s almost like he’s telling you that you’re an idiot and should watch where you’re going. As if the vehicle in question isn’t going way over the speed limit. The driver parks and steps out, waving at you with his keys in his hand.

“Heya, princess.” Toji smiles. “Get in the car shit head.” he directs his son, his thumb pointing in the direction of the passenger side. He’s parked right by Gojo, prompting both yourself and Megumi to walk over to your respected rides home.

“Don’t you know how to drive?” you ask, accidentally aloud. He seems like the type who does, so it begs the question of why he doesn’t drive himself around.

“Don’t you? Or are you too much of an entitled bitch to do it yourself?” he mutters, hoping his father doesn’t overhear his crass comment. He clears his throat, not to issue an apology, he stands by what he said. But he decides to answer your almost invasive question. “I don’t have a car, yet.”

You nod, satisfied with the answer although regretting asking at all. Toji has noticed the tension between you, but all of your focus for now is on Gojo. Getting home is your top priority, although you weren’t looking forward to spending the evening in yours and Yuuji's home all by yourself. Gojo pulls his sunglasses down from the bridge of his nose to the tip. Your stomach clenches as he steps out of the car.

What the fuck is he doing?

It seems he’s following a voice, and when he finally locates the source, his face is unrecognisable. A grin wider than you’ve ever seen and bulging eyes you worry are probably hurting him. It’s Toji, he recognises.

It really is a small world.

“Toji Fushiguro? Playing daddy day care at last, I didn’t know you were visiting town.” he teases.

The scowl that splays across Toji’s expression is recognisable, but also not, at the same time. You’re sure you’ve seen that very same facial contortion as he bullies his son, putting him into place and demanding obedience. He's furious. But again, it’s a slightly different sight to what you’ve seen before. Toji wouldn’t hesitate to smack his son if he stepped out of line. But the way he’s looking at Gojo…

It’s like he could kill him.

“Fuck are you doing here?” he asks your alabaster haired chauffer. Megumi rolls his eyes, instantly getting into the car. It’s like he’s seen this dance a million times before. He’s over it. But you… are very intrigued.

“Collecting her, obviously.” he replies. The lack of use of your name makes you tense, but before you can tell him to be more polite, Toji opens his mouth to speak. But Gojo doesn’t let him get a word in quite yet. “Getting Megumi’s hopes up again I see. How long until you let him down this time? Since we both know you won’t be sticking around.” Gojo snidely comments. Toji grits his teeth, slamming a palm down on the hood of his car and pointing rudely at Gojo with the other hand.

“Watch your fucking mouth, because I’m sticking around for good.” he announces. Gojo scoffs, as if he’s heard that a few times in his life. It matters not to him, however, but he does care about Megumi. He knows it’ll mess him up even more if he skips town on him again. “Where’s Yuuji? I thought you kept better company than this.” Toji queries. You shake your head, not willing to divulge where your boyfriend is for fear of crying about it again.

“I’ll be keeping an eye on her while Yuuji is out of the country, so I think you’ll be seeing a lot of me from now on, Toji.” Gojo smarms, clearly relishing in how irritated his acquaintance is.

Toji gets into his car and slams the door behind him, wasting no time departing the scene. Gojo shrugs with a sneer etched on his face, a characteristic that you’re beginning to recognise as quintessentially Gojo. You get in the car, not acknowledging or discussing anything you’ve just witnessed. It’s clear they’ve got history. They have obvious beef between them, but you find yourself being unable to care, instead worrying that you might become a pawn in their game.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” he tells you as you step out of the car. You turn, awkwardly, to face him. That wasn’t the plan. You’re pretty confident this was just a favour for today. Doesn’t he have a life of his own?

“That’s not what you said yesterday.” you alert him. He nods in agreement. Can’t a guy change his mind?

“Yeah, but did you see how pissed Fushiguro was? I’ll be more than happy to be your driver if it bothers him that much.” he chuckles, it’s obvious that he’s proud of himself and his petty idea. So, you smile back, but it’s out of obligation more than amusement.

“Don’t bother, please.” you tell him. “I have zero desire in being a rope in a game of tug of war.” you explain, turning on your heel to enter your home.

“Fine, suit yourself. Have fun driving yourself tomorrow.” he tells you, starting his car back up to leave. “Don’t be afraid to call me though…” he finishes, finally pulling out of the parking space.

You offer a flimsy wave as you watch him leave. Despite everything you said, you are grateful to him and the acts of kindness he has offered in the wake of Yuuji’s absence. But you do hope you can get through this alone. You don’t want to resort to calling Satoru Gojo every day.

It’s a miracle you’d managed to stay strong all day. And yet, your will soon crumbles after an unexpected phone call from your mother. She rarely calls. All correspondence is usually via handwritten letters, she’s old fashioned liked that.

Unfortunately, she's calling with intent, and somehow she’d caught wind of Yuuji’s absence. It doesn’t take long for you to connect the dots in your head.

Megumi ➪ Toji ➪ Your mother.

It’s a good thing that he’s left you, according to her. She implies that you’ll come to realise how much better off you are without him while he’s gone. He isn’t right for you. He’ll never fit in to your world. It’s the same old fucking story you’ve heard time and time again. But even you don’t fit into your stupid little world. You want to make your own world with him.

“Naoya has been visiting us, I think you should give him another chance.” she tells you, a coercive tone in her poisonous words. You hope she hears the loud, disapproving scoff that bursts from your throat. That will never happen. Not in this lifetime nor the next. In fact, if you never see Naoya again you’re sure it’ll be too soon.

“Goodbye, mother.”

At least you stayed strong until you hung up. But you can’t help but cry when the silence in the house hits your heart like a stake in a vampire’s chest.

You’d kill to have Yuuji around right now, comforting you, telling you that your mother can’t keep you apart. He won’t let her. Nothing will change that, not even this distance between you for three months.

Your skin almost peels off and splats against the ceiling when your doorbell unexpectedly rings. Maybe it’s Gojo returning to apologise. He doesn’t seem like the apologising type, though, he could be here for any reason. There’s no way you’ll be able to cover up the fact that you’ve been crying; so you choose not to even bother. But that’s a decision you find yourself regretting when you find Toji at your front door.

“Hey… Woah, princess, you been cryin’?” he asks. You nod, but brush it off with a flimsy wave as you sidestep, allowing him to come inside. Toji is the last person you expected to see. Actually, maybe second last. You’re sure Megumi would sooner see himself dead before he comes to your door for any reason.

He seems worked up. Neither of you bother sitting down, it’s obvious he has no intention to stay. You don’t even understand why he’s here. What possible reason could he have for turning up unannounced like this? On further thought, though, you can’t really blame him for not letting you know. It’s not like he has any of your contact information. And you’d sooner give Naoya a chance before you handed them over to Megumi.

“What’s wrong?” you wonder.

“Nothin’,” he lies. You can see that he’s trying to figure out what he wants to say in his mind. He’s agitated and fidgeting. It’s a far stretch from the Toji you’re used to, the man who oozes confidence and has everyone in a room hanging on his every word. “listen, I’ve been thinkin’ I could take you to school instead of Gojo from now on.”

You sigh, heading towards the sofas nearby to get comfortable. You aren’t expecting a long conversation, but you doubt it’ll be short either. If possible, you want to avoid any backstory about the drama between them.

“I told Gojo I don’t want to be part of whatever this is already. I don’t want to be used so you can score points on each other, so I told him not to bother getting me tomorrow.” you announce. Toji smirks at that, clearly satisfied that Gojo hasn’t sunken his claws into you. But he isn’t fully satiated, he isn’t finished.

“I heard about Yuuji leaving for a while.” he hums, taking a seat on the couch opposite to you. He rests his arms on his thighs and focuses all of his attention on you. “Wanna talk about it?” he adds. You sneer at that.

“Haven’t you done enough talking about it to my mother?” you question, your gaze pointed and furious. His eyebrows furrow, perplexed by the statement.

“Huh?”

It’s earnest. You can see it clearly, he had nothing to do with your mother finding out about Yuuji leaving. Which begs the question, who the fuck told her? You shrug it off, telling him to disregard your comment.

You’re just… stressed.

“I don’t want to talk about it, anyway. Sick of talking about it to be honest.”

“Fine.”

It’s awkward. You’ve never felt like this around Toji before. It makes you wonder if this might be how Megumi feels around his father on a day-to-day basis. At a loss of what to say and uncomfortable in his presence. It’s strange to have him be like this, he’s always been talkative with you since your parents’ party. It almost feels like he’s doing it on purpose.

“Look, I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I’m not the most liked guy around.” he begins, glaring down at his feet as he speaks. It’s amusing to you, and even he can’t help but grin when he notices you smiling. Toji? Disliked? Shocker! “It doesn’t bother me since I don’t like a lot of people either. But you… I don’t know. I’ve got a soft spot for ya, I suppose.”

“I think it’s guilt.”

“What?”

“You just feel guilty because Megumi has been bullying me and it’s mostly your fault. You don’t have a soft spot for me. It’s just guilt.” you lecture, earning a grunt from your elder friend.

“Yeah, I do feel guilty. So fucking what, huh? Doesn’t mean I don’t care about ya. You aren’t in my head and you don’t know how I fucking feel, so if I’m sayin’ I’ve got a soft spot for you then I do. Got it?”

You roll your eyes, you didn’t mean to get so under his skin but hearing him go off at you like this is new territory. It’s like he’s your dad. And to be honest, that thought doesn’t infuriate you. Anything is an upgrade compared to your real parents, after all.

“Where are you going with this?” you inquire, sounding unbothered to mask how curious you are. He ruffles his hand through his hair quickly before sitting upright to face you again.

“Let me drive you around. Not because of Gojo. Because of me. I want to because I want to, not for any other reason. I wanna help you out babe.” he speaks sincerely. It’s bizarre to think you know him so well considering you’ve known him for barely any time at all. You can’t help but find yourself drawn to him. Attached to each and every word he says. And you trust him. You aren’t sure why, no one else does. But for whatever reason, you do.

“What about—?”

“Megumi’ll leave you alone,” he cuts you off before you can even voice the thought, “’m not gonna tell him to take a hike though, you know I’m tryna make things better between us.” he continues. “But I’ll make him sit in the back if you want. Or— I don’t know we’ll figure it out.”

“Okay then…”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you nod, “I’ll let you be my ride.”

You hope your words hide the doubt in your tone. It’s too late to turn back now. Toji grins from ear to ear, you can’t quite believe how overjoyed he is. His expression doesn’t dispel the doubts you’re feeling. Though you’re sure nothing ever could where Megumi is concerned. But, you trust him.

You trust Toji to keep you safe.

#saber reads #saber reads jjk #s.fav

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bysaber · 2 months

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there's no men for me in this world.

holy fuck.

(i'll stick with fictional ones <3)

#pissed off #saber rants

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bysaber · 2 months

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kakashi

#saber appreciates fanart #kakashi of mine 🤍

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bysaber · 2 months

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words to use when writing

Appetite:

craving, demand, gluttony, greed, hunger, inclination, insatiable, longing, lust, passion, ravenousness, relish, taste, thirst, urge, voracity, weakness, willingness, yearning, ardor, dedication, desire, devotion, enthusiasm, excitement, fervor, horny, intensity, keenness, wholeheartedness, zeal

Arouse:

agitate, awaken, electrify, enliven, excite, entice, foment, goad, incite, inflame, instigate, kindle, provoke, rally, rouse, spark, stimulate, stir, thrill, waken, warm, whet, attract, charm, coax, fire up, fuel, heat up, lure, produce, stir up, tantalize, tease, tempt, thrum, torment, wind up, work up

Assault:

attack, advancing, aggressive, assailing, charging, incursion, inundated, invasion, offensive, onset, onslaught, overwhelmed, ruinous, tempestuous, strike, violation, ambush, assail, barrage, bombard, bombardment, crackdown, wound

Beautiful:

admirable, alluring, angelic, appealing, bewitching, charming, dazzling, delicate, delightful, divine, elegant, enticing, exquisite, fascinating, gorgeous, graceful, grand, magnificent, marvelous, pleasing, radiant, ravishing, resplendent, splendid, stunning, sublime, attractive, beguiling, captivating, enchanting, engaging, enthralling, eye-catching, fetching, fine, fine-looking, good-looking, handsome, inviting, lovely, mesmeric, mesmerizing, pretty, rakish, refined, striking, tantalizing, tempting

Brutal:

atrocious, barbarous, bloodthirsty, callous, cruel, feral, ferocious, hard, harsh, heartless, inhuman, merciless, murderous, pitiless, remorseless, rough, rude, ruthless, savage, severe, terrible, unmerciful, vicious, bestial, brute, brutish, cold-blooded, fierce, gory, nasty, rancorous, sadistic, uncompromising, unfeeling, unforgiving, unpitying, violent, wild

Burly:

able-bodied, athletic, beefy, big, brawny, broad-shouldered, bulky, dense, enormous, great, hard, hardy, hearty, heavily built, heavy, hefty, huge, husky, immense, large, massive, muscular, mighty, outsized, oversized, powerful, powerfully built, prodigious, robust, solid, stalwart, stocky, stout, strapping, strong, strongly built, sturdy, thick, thickset, tough, well-built, well-developed

Carnal:

animalistic, bodily, impure, lascivious, lecherous, lewd, libidinous, licentious, lustful, physical, prurient, salacious, sensuous, voluptuous, vulgar, wanton, , coarse, crude, dirty, raunchy, rough, unclean

Dangerous:

alarming, critical, fatal, formidable, impending, malignant, menacing, mortal, nasty, perilous, precarious, pressing, serious, terrible, threatening, treacherous, urgent, vulnerable, wicked, acute, damaging, deadly, death-defying, deathly, destructive, detrimental, explosive, grave, harmful, hazardous, injurious, lethal, life-threatening, noxious, poisonous, risky, severe, terrifying, toxic, unsafe, unstable, venomous

Dark:

atrocious, corrupt, forbidding, foul, infernal, midnight, morbid, ominous, sinful, sinister, somber, threatening, twilight, vile, wicked, abject, alarming, appalling, baleful, bizarre, bleak, bloodcurdling, boding evil, chilling, cold, condemned, creepy, damned, daunting, demented, desolate, dire, dismal, disturbing, doomed, dour, dread, dreary, dusk, eerie, fear, fearsome, frightening, ghastly, ghostly, ghoulish, gloom, gloomy, grave, grim, grisly, gruesome, hair-raising, haunted, hideous, hopeless, horrendous, horrible, horrid, horrific, horrifying, horror, ill-fated, ill-omened, ill-starred, inauspicious, inhospitable, looming, lost, macabre, malice, malignant, menacing, murky, mysterious, night, panic, pessimistic, petrifying, scary, shadows, shadowy, shade, shady, shocking, soul-destroying, sour, spine-chilling, spine-tingling, strange, terrifying, uncanny, unearthly, unlucky, unnatural, unnerving, weird, wretched

Delicious:

enticing, exquisite, luscious, lush, rich, savory, sweet, tasty, tempting, appetizing, delectable, flavorsome, full of flavor, juicy, lip-smacking, mouth-watering, piquant, relish, ripe, salty, spicy, scrummy, scrumptious, succulent, tangy, tart, tasty, yummy, zesty

Ecstasy:

delectation, delirium, elation, euphoria, fervor, frenzy, joy, rapture, transport, bliss, excitement, happiness, heaven, high, paradise, rhapsody, thrill, blissful, delighted, elated, extremely happy, in raptures (of delight), in seventh heaven, jubilant, on cloud nine, overexcited, overjoyed, rapturous, thrilled

Ecstatic:

delirious, enraptured, euphoric, fervent, frenzied, joyous, transported, wild

Erotic:

amatory, amorous, aphrodisiac, carnal, earthy, erogenous, fervid, filthy, hot, impassioned, lascivious, lecherous, lewd, raw, romantic, rousing, salacious, seductive, sensual, sexual, spicy, steamy, stimulating, suggestive, titillating, voluptuous, tantalizing

Gasp:

catch of breath, choke, gulp, heave, inhale, pant, puff, snort, wheeze, huff, rasp, sharp intake of air, short of breath, struggle for breath, swallow, winded

Heated:

ardent, avid, excited, fervent, fervid, fierce, fiery, frenzied, furious, impassioned, intense, passionate, raging, scalding, scorched, stormy, tempestuous, vehement, violent, ablaze, aflame, all-consuming, blazing, blistering, burning, crazed, explosive, febrile, feverish, fired up, flaming, flushed, frantic, hot, hot-blooded, impatient, incensed, maddening, obsessed, possessed, randy, searing, sizzling, smoldering, sweltering, torrid, turbulent, volatile, worked up, zealous

Hunger:

appetite, ache, craving, gluttony, greed, longing, lust, mania, mouth-watering, ravenous, voracious, want, yearning, thirst

Hungry:

avid, carnivorous, covetous, craving, eager, greedy, hungered, rapacious, ravenous, starved, unsatisfied, voracious, avaricious, desirous, famished, grasping, insatiable, keen, longing, predatory, ravening, starving, thirsty, wanting

Intense:

forceful, severe, passionate, acute, agonizing, ardent, anxious, biting, bitter, burning, close, consuming, cutting, deep, eager, earnest, excessive, exquisite, extreme, fervent, fervid, fierce, forcible, great, harsh, impassioned, keen, marked, piercing, powerful, profound, severe, sharp, strong, vehement, violent, vivid, vigorous

Liquid:

damp, cream, creamy, dripping, ichorous, juicy, moist, luscious, melted, moist, pulpy, sappy, soaking, solvent, sopping, succulent, viscous, wet / aqueous, broth, elixir, extract, flux, juice, liquor, nectar, sap, sauce, secretion, solution, vitae, awash, moisture, boggy, dewy, drenched, drip, drop, droplet, drowning, flood, flooded, flowing, fountain, jewel, leaky, milky, overflowing, saturated, slick, slippery, soaked, sodden, soggy, stream, swamp, tear, teardrop, torrent, waterlogged, watery, weeping

Lithe:

agile, lean, pliant, slight, spare, sinewy, slender, supple, deft, fit, flexible, lanky, leggy, limber, lissom, lissome, nimble, sinuous, skinny, sleek, slender, slim, svelte, trim, thin, willowy, wiry

Moan:

beef, cry, gripe, grouse, grumble, lament, lamentation, plaint, sob, wail, whine, bemoan, bewail, carp, deplore, grieve, gripe, grouse, grumble, keen, lament, sigh, sob, wail, whine, mewl

Moving:

(exciting,) affecting, effective arousing, awakening, breathless, dynamic, eloquent, emotional, emotive, expressive, fecund, far-out, felt in gut, grabbed by, gripping, heartbreaking, heartrending, impelling, impressive, inspirational, meaningful, mind-bending, mind-blowing, motivating, persuasive, poignant, propelling, provoking, quickening, rallying, rousing, significant, stimulating, simulative, stirring, stunning, touching, awe-inspiring, energizing, exhilarating, fascinating, heart pounding, heart stopping, inspiring, riveting, thrilling

Need:

compulsion, demand, desperate, devoir, extremity, impatient longing, must, urge, urgency / desire, appetite, avid, burn, craving, eagerness, fascination, greed, hunger, insatiable, longing, lust, taste, thirst, voracious, want, yearning, ache, addiction, aspiration, desire, fever, fixation, hankering, hope, impulse, inclination, infatuation, itch, obsession, passion, pining, wish, yen

Pain:

ache, afflict, affliction, agony, agonize, anguish, bite, burn, chafe, distress, fever, grief, hurt, inflame, laceration, misery, pang, punish, sting, suffering, tenderness, throb, throe, torment, torture, smart

Painful:

aching, agonizing, arduous, awful, biting, burning, caustic, dire, distressing, dreadful, excruciating, extreme, grievous, inflamed, piercing, raw, sensitive, severe, sharp, tender, terrible, throbbing, tormenting, angry, bleeding, bloody, bruised, cutting, hurting, injured, irritated, prickly, skinned, smarting, sore, stinging, unbearable, uncomfortable, upsetting, wounded

Perverted:

aberrant, abnormal, corrupt, debased, debauched, defiling, depraved, deviant, monstrous, tainted, twisted, vicious, warped, wicked, abhorrent, base, decadent, degenerate, degrading, dirty, disgusting, dissipated, dissolute, distasteful, hedonistic, immodest, immoral, indecent, indulgent, licentious, nasty, profligate, repellent, repugnant, repulsive, revolting, shameful, shameless, sickening, sinful, smutty, sordid, unscrupulous, vile

Pleasurable:

charming, gratifying, luscious, satisfying, savory, agreeable, delicious, delightful, enjoyable, nice, pleasant, pleasing, soothing, succulent

Pleasure:

bliss, delight, gluttony, gratification, relish, satisfaction, thrill, adventure, amusement, buzz, contentment, delight, desire, ecstasy, enjoyment, excitement, fun, happiness, harmony, heaven, joy, kick, liking, paradise, seventh heaven

Rapacious:

avaricious, ferocious, furious, greedy, predatory, ravening, ravenous, savage, voracious, aggressive, gluttonous, grasping, insatiable, marauding, plundering

Rapture:

bliss, ecstasy, elation, exaltation, glory, gratification, passion, pleasure, floating, unbridled joy

Rigid:

adamant, austere, definite, determined, exact, firm, hard, rigorous, solid, stern, uncompromising, unrelenting, unyielding, concrete, fixed, harsh, immovable, inflexible, obstinate, resolute, resolved, severe, steadfast, steady, stiff, strong, strict, stubborn, taut, tense, tight, tough, unbending, unchangeable, unwavering

Sudden:

abrupt, accelerated, acute, fast, flashing, fleeting, hasty, headlong, hurried, immediate, impetuous, impulsive, quick, quickening, rapid, rash, rushing, swift, brash, brisk, brusque, instant, instantaneous, out of the blue, reckless, rushed, sharp, spontaneous, urgent, without warning

Thrust:

(forward) advance, drive, forge, impetus, impulsion, lunge, momentum, onslaught, poke, pressure, prod, propulsion, punch, push, shove, power, proceed, progress, propel

(push hard) assail, assault, attack, bear down, buck, drive, force, heave, impale, impel, jab, lunge, plunge, press, pound, prod, ram, shove, stab, transfix, urge, bang, burrow, cram, gouge, jam, pierce, punch, slam, spear, spike, stick

Thunder-struck:

amazed, astonished, aghast, astounded, awestruck, confounded, dazed, dazed, dismayed, overwhelmed, shocked, staggered, startled, stunned, gob-smacked, bewildered, dumbfounded, flabbergasted, horrified, incredulous, surprised, taken aback

Torment:

agony, anguish, hurt, misery, pain, punishment, suffering, afflict, angst, conflict, distress, grief, heartache, misfortune, nightmare, persecute, plague, sorrow, strife, tease, test, trial, tribulation, torture, turmoil, vex, woe

Touch:

(physical) - blow, brush, caress, collide, come together, contact, converge, crash, cuddle, embrace, feel, feel up, finger, fondle, frisk, glance, glide, graze, grope, handle, hit, hug, impact, join, junction, kiss, lick, line, manipulate, march, massage, meet, nudge, palm, partake, pat, paw, peck, pet, pinch, probe, push, reach, rub, scratch, skim, slide, smooth, strike, stroke, suck, sweep, tag, tap, taste, thumb, tickle, tip, touching, toy, bite, bump, burrow, buss, bury, circle, claw, clean, clutch, cover, creep, crush, cup, curl, delve, dig, drag, draw, ease, edge, fiddle with, flick, flit, fumble, grind, grip, grub, hold, huddle, knead, lap, lave, lay a hand on, maneuver, manhandle, mash, mold, muzzle, neck, nestle, nibble, nip, nuzzle, outline, play, polish, press, pull, rasp, ravish, ream, rim, run, scoop, scrabble, scrape, scrub, shave, shift, shunt, skate, slip, slither, smack, snake, snuggle, soothe, spank, splay, spread, squeeze, stretch, swipe, tangle, tease, thump, tongue, trace, trail, tunnel twiddle, twirl, twist, tug, work, wrap

(mental) - communicate, examine, inspect, perception, scrutinize

Wet:

bathe, bleed, burst, cascade, course, cover, cream, damp, dampen, deluge, dip, douse, drench, dribble, drip, drizzle, drool, drop, drown, dunk, erupt, flood, flow, gush, immerse, issue, jet, leach, leak, moisten, ooze, overflow, permeate, plunge, pour, rain, rinse, run, salivate, saturate, secrete, seep, shower, shoot, slaver, slobber, slop, slosh, sluice, spill, soak, souse, spew, spit, splash, splatter, spout, spray, sprinkle, spurt, squirt, steep, stream, submerge, surge, swab, swamp, swill, swim, trickle, wash, water

Wicked:

abominable, amoral, atrocious, awful, base, barbarous, dangerous, debased, depraved, distressing, dreadful, evil, fearful, fiendish, fierce, foul, heartless, hazardous, heinous, immoral, indecent, intense, mean, nasty, naughty, nefarious, offensive, profane, scandalous, severe, shameful, shameless, sinful, terrible, unholy, vicious, vile, villainous, wayward, bad, criminal, cruel, deplorable, despicable, devious, ill-intentioned, impious, impish, iniquitous, irreverent, loathsome, Machiavellian, mad, malevolent, malicious, merciless, mischievous, monstrous, perverse, ruthless, spiteful, uncaring, unkind, unscrupulous, vindictive, virulent, wretched

Writhe:

agonize, bend, jerk, recoil, lurch, plunge, slither, squirm, struggle, suffer, thrash, thresh, twist, wiggle, wriggle, angle, arc, bow, buck, coil, contort, convulse, curl, curve, fidget, fight, flex, go into spasm, grind, heave, jiggle, jolt, kick, rear, reel, ripple, resist, roll, lash, lash out, screw up, shake, shift, slide, spasm, stir, strain, stretch, surge, swell, swivel, thrust, turn violently, tussle, twitch, undulate, warp, worm, wrench, wrestle, yank

#s.writing tips

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bysaber · 2 months

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NOOOOO SABERRRR!!! I just saw your pfp in my activity and I’m like yay did saber post something new. NOOO, you actually took the time to read my awful long fic and even reply to it and tell me what parts of it you liked??? I’m literally crying like you have no idea how much that made my day, month!! UGHHH LIKE WHAT DO I EVEN SAY IDEK ANYMORE IM TOO OVERWHELMED AND SPEECHLESS. I only ever log onto tumblr in public to distract myself from the screeching sound of the train I take back home and IM FREAKING TEARING UPPPP ON THIS TRAIN , anytime I ever feel down, trust, I’m logging onto tumblr and just searching for your comment 😭 okay okay I’ve calmed down, TYSMMMMM!! Honestly I really appreciate it, this was such a sweet thing to do, you’re amazing. You’re a great/fantastic/heartwarming/emotion-invoking/everything in between writer. And you’re an even better moot <3333 . Hope you’re doing well and everything you wish for comes to you!

P.S/ keep it on the low is forever lingering in my mind and in my heart. I have this weird unhinged obsession with megumi it’s very concerning istg 😭😭 and that masterpiece just made me 100x worse.

EUORIAAAAN!!! <333

OF COURSE I READ IT!!! i LOVED it, really. actually i these past few days i was checking your account to see if there were any new parts because it WAS SO GOOD!! it got me hooked and feeling !!!!!!!

it’s been a while since i’ve read any aot content and let me tell you, now all i want to do is rewatch and hyper focus on it again AHAUAHA gOD you made me remember how much i love levi and eren. so THANK YOU for writing that, it’s perfect!

and IM SO GLAD YOU LIKED KIOLT (this name is too big i need to stop doing that)

im also super obsessed w megumi i could die for him ugh :( sometimes i need to refrain myself from writing megumi stuff or else my blog would be 100% megumi, probably.

BUT ITS SO GOOD TO KNOW YOU LIKE HIM THAT MUCH AS WELL!!! i hope i can continue to feed you with good megumi content <3

#askaway #euorian 🖤#kiotl

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bysaber · 2 months

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under the influence / hayakawa aki

When Aki gets dragged to the most popular strip club in Tokyo in hopes it'll help him "de-stress", against all odds, you help him do just that. In return, he finally cures your itch for something more.

pairing: hayakawa aki x fem!reader

word count: TBA

tags: 18+, aki is a virgin, reader is a stripper, plot heavy, drinking & smoking, strangers to lovers, semi-public sex, dry humping, finger sucking, body worship, hand job, blow job, orgasm control, fingering, creampie, virginity loss / virgin kink, cumplay, overstimulation, reader is shorter than aki, reader has nipple piercings, reader has a bit of experience, both reader and aki are incredibly touch-starved

read on ao3

MASTERLIST.

chapter one — strawberry daiquiri

chapter two — pink lemonade mimosa (soon)

chapter three — epilogue (soon)

if you'd like to be tagged when future chapters release, join the taglist here!

#saber.tbr

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bysaber · 2 months

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kakashi loves falling asleep while he's still inside you.

even while you playfully squirm away and complain that he has to at least let you go for the obligatory post-sex bathroom break, he just hugs you closer and mumbles "just a few more minutes." he doesn't mean to hold you captive—honest! but he feels so cozy and happy that those "few more minutes" tick away with no sign of his grip letting up. he can't help it. he's been exhausted since he woke up, and his days are never easy. he's more than happy to spend the last of his energy fucking you silly, even able to finish multiple times thanks to how sweet you sound when you beg for him one more round. but after that final orgasm, when all that's left in him is the need to hold you as your overstimulated pussy continues to shiver around him, he's falling asleep quickly whether he likes it or not. every time, he thinks his sheer willpower will be enough to keep him awake. but lying there with you in the afterglow is heaven, and by the time you're ready to inform him that "just a few more minutes" are up, he's out like a light.

but how could you possibly hold it against him? you're just so soft and warm, wrapped around his dick and safe in his arms. and you're the first to admit, you didn't want him to pull out anyway. so you fall asleep right after him, hoping that when he wakes up, he's already hard inside you, ready for round three.

#want him :(#saber reads #saber reads naruto #kakashi hatake x reader

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bysaber · 2 months

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WOAH?????????? WOAH!!!!!!!

first of all, LEVI!!! LEVI 💞💞💞😍😍😍 IM FANGIRLING SO HARRRRDD..!!! she was really living her best life oh my god he’s so perfect he’d be so good to her i just know it :(

“You're the least annoying person I've met so far.” the exact opposite of what eren told her I was MELTING and SHAKING.

I DIDNT EXPECT EVERYTHING TO BE A MISUNDERSTANDING ON CONNIE’S PART IM SO SAAAAD!!! also eren writing for her everyday? SIMP. DESERVED - im also a simp for him. i want him to suffer as i kiss him on the lips, toxic baby

THE WAY THEY KEEP FAILING TO MEET EACH OTHER I WAS SO TENSE OH FUCK. sending all my love and prayers to reader she’ll need it

(im loving it and still RUNNING 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️ to read the next part)

(i wasn’t even going to comment on this one but i felt SO MANY YHINGS i kinda felt the Need to)

Pt. 2"눈을 보고 말할래요. "보고 싶었어요"

⋆｡˚୨୧˚｡⋆synopsis: you're living your best life, leaving everything behind in the past however a small 'family' gathering at Levi's home threatens to unfold everything.

⋆｡˚୨୧˚｡⋆contains: modern au! everyone, Levi's mom and uncle are alive in this au, mentions of swearing but not actual swearing, Carla is also alive, Eren's dad is absent, mentions of medication.

⋆｡˚୨୧˚｡⋆wc: 9.8K.

⋆｡˚୨୧˚｡⋆tw: swearing, mentions of pills, medication use and brief manipulation.

⋆｡˚୨୧˚｡⋆ Here is 1 and 3

Life is going great.

You're done with finals, you're graduating in a few weeks, and you've prepared your graduation gown and a bucket list of all the places you'd like to visit during your friend group trip to the country you've always wanted to travel to.

You've made new friends, such good loving friends. You love them like a relative, like a long lost possession about to bid its goodbye once more. You cherish the time you spend with them and they've shown you that they feel the exact same way.

All of you get along so well, you find joy and solace in each other's company, and the laughter is actually genuine. It's a huge contrast to the previous chapter of your life, where toxicity and ugly attitudes were all you knew about friendships. Now, the warmth of genuine friendships surrounds you. And you couldn't be more grateful.

You've also fallen in love with composing songs and soundtracks, which was originally brought up by a friend of yours after they saw you playing around with a launchpad and they started grooving crazily to the beat you made up on the spot and other times you created melodies that made them cry.

So now, you part-time compose soundtracks for this new uprising director, Levi Ackerman. He's French-Japanese, very well-known in the film industry and you may or may not have the biggest crush on him. He's blunt, reserved, stoic, and loaded with creativity. Nowadays, you are working on his breakthrough project, his films create a canvas for your musical symphonies and all of this wouldn't have happened if your friends didn't lovingly force you to email him your samples.

Honestly, they are your biggest hype-mans, your number-one fans, and your admirers. They tell you that you're so talented that if you released some of your music, you'd be winning awards left to right. But you don't think they'll believe you if you tell them.

You have won awards, plenty of them, more than you can count however the problem is you've won them indirectly.

4 years have passed ever since you went no contact with your 'old friends' and in those 4 years while you were living your best life, working hard to get to where you are right now, they have become popular and not just '10K popular and one viral hit' popular, we're talking about '10 million albums sold, a world tour (and another one coming up), Billboard's most weeks on chart, surpassing world legends and 3 Grammys' popular. Connie on the other hand became a YouTuber and he's amassed a total of 13M subscribers and Historia started a fashion company on par with the leading designers of today.

Half of the songs on their albums that supposedly broke the charts were produced by none other than...you. Most of the ideas on Connie's YouTube channel were brainstormed by the both of you and you see familiar designs on the clothes that celebrities wear because it was you who created that blueprint.

The last two you can't take much credit for but for the songs? Your compositions, your melodies which you have poured all your soul into, have become the backdrop of their meteoric rise.

You don't know how to feel, everything seems so bittersweet.

On one hand, there's pride in your work being recognized on such a grand scale. On the other, there's the confusion and overall sense of unease that comes with the realization.

You had so many questions surrounding this topic such as, 'Why didn't they credit you' and 'Did they do it on purpose or was it accidental'

After all, no one knows where you are, you are left with no information, you cut off everyone and now that you think it through, realistically there was no way to credit you.

While curious about their whole uprise to fame, you remind yourself that although you do deserve the credit and the fame, it's not what you're looking for right now. You've got a different helmet on and if you have to regain contact with them to gain your rightfully so credit, they might as well keep it.

You are interrupted from your session of zoning out by a p!ng, an email pops up on your computer with the subject being Urgent and the sender being Levi Ackerman.

Urgent:

come over.

You've grown accustomed to his antics by now, as you have been working together for about 2 years now. If he says 'It's urgent' it's very likely that it's just 'I don't want to ask anyone else because it's embarrassing so I'll ask you'

So you reply back with a call, smiling to yourself as you decide to tease him a little. After the 5th ring, he picks up which is funny considering he's just staring at the phone ringing until he deems it's the right ring to answer to seem like he was busy.

"What?" He asks sighing as if he has better things to do with his time.

"Oh no, it's nothing. I'm just wondering when you'll switch to texting because I can't really keep up with fossils" you reply trying to get a rise out of him.

"The only thing fossil is your humour" He retorts unfazed as he sips on something in the background, obviously tea.

"Are you sure it's not your age, I'm pretty sure you were friends with Aurelius at one point"

"Cute, are you sure it's not your personality, I'm sure I've met thousands of people with the exact same everything as you."

"Ouch, I didn't deserve that" you reply, feigning hurt in your voice when you're actually just joking.

"So what do you need? What is so urgent" you ask, curious of what it is this time.

"Come over and you'll know" He responds curtly and before you can respond, he hangs up on you. You scoff, internally noting to give him an earful when you get to his place. You roll your eyes at his attitude, his characteristic not unfamiliar to you.

With a quick text to your roommate, you inform her about your plans for the night and that food is in the fridge. Anticipating her lack of response due to her own night out partying, you head out, leaving the message to be read by her whenever she can.

Levi's home is a 15-minute drive from your apartment, he lives in the middle of the very fashioned neighborhood. Despite being full of creativity and the creator of films that have everyone on the edge of their seat, the man can't design his house at all. He has the design of a monochromatic minimalist, with no sign of color anywhere, you can't stand it. Everything is grey there, you feel the color getting sucked out of you when you enter his house.

Finally, you arrive there quickly enough as the road to his neighborhood is quite deserted. You struggle to park the car in his driveway as it's very narrow but after a few minutes, you manage.

Guess rich people don't leave their houses, you think as you ring the doorbell to his house.

He opens the door and stands there with his nth cup of tea somewhat observing you before telling you 'You know the drill, I'll be in the office'.

Ah, the drill, how could you forget? You give him a sarcastic smile before watching him walk off and adhere to the so-called drill.

You have to take off your shoes, put them in a disinfectant bag, seal it up, and hang it on the shoe rack. As well as disinfecting your hands twice and hanging your coat and bag on a coat rack where you clean it both with some weird lint roller he has. You don't mind it really, it is his house after all.

After doing all that, you put on some guest slippers and head to his office. The house hasn't changed since your last visit, it's almost vibrating with greyness. You feel like smiling is forbidden, which may be, in the comfort of his home.

You turn a corner and see him sitting in his office chair playing back parts of his last movie and writing notes on how to improve. The mood would be better if the office had some sort of personality to it but no, this is an asylum.

"You know I recently came across a color palette, and it immediately reminded me of you, It was more on the brown side, with beautiful shades of wood, warm earth tones, and hints of amber." You share with Levi, attempting to bring a touch of color into the monochromatic conversation.

"There were even hints of grey" You add to gain his curiosity after he seems to have ignored you at the first attempt at making conversation.

Levi raises an eyebrow and stares at you through the rim of his glasses, clearly unimpressed by the mention of color invading his sanctuary of grayscale. "Why would a color palette remind you of me?" he questions, his tone conveying sarcasm and a hint of curiosity.

You chuckle, finding his reaction predictable. "Well, it had a certain rugged elegance like someone I know and also because I think it would suit you"

He rolls his eyes and scoffs, a faint trace of a sarcastic smirk playing on his lips. He gets up from his desk to head towards the office cabinet. "Flattery won't change my stance, I like how things are just fine. "

"I don't know what kind of colour trauma you've obtained during your centuries of living but to each their own, I guess" You joke smiling widely as he deadpans at your joke of his age before you change the subject and look upon where he's going. He has a teacup collection in his office cabinet, you think but shrug it off instantly as it kind of makes sense for the tea-addict man to have a teacup collection. The cabinet seems to be reserved for just tea, teacups, teabags, tea flavors, and even tea scents. Perhaps he was a teashop owner in another life.

He pours the pre-made fresh tea into one of the cups and places it before you, "So now that I'm here, what do you want?"

He puts his pen down and takes off his reading glasses, before interlocking his fingers and taking a more serious stance. You honestly think he's about to fire you but his glint seems a bit more personal.

"I need a plus one" he finally admits as if it was the hardest thing ever.

Your eyes widen in surprise at Levi's unexpected request for a plus one. Your lips barely touch the cup's rim and decide to taste it later for fear of choking on your tea. His usually stern demeanor seems to soften for a moment, revealing a side of him that isn't often on display.

"But for two events, one personal and the other official." He continues.

"Personal, as in you wanna ask me out?" you ask, totally confused because that makes no sense.

"Tsk, no you idiot, maybe let me finish next time" He interjected quickly hands discreetly covering his ears at the tiniest blush that formed at the tip of them.

You become flustered at the abrupt response, slightly embarrassed by your assumption. "Maybe don't take prehistoric pauses between sentences. What's the personal event?"

He takes a moment to regain his composure, the brief flicker of a curious glint in his eyes indicating that he might be enjoying the misunderstanding on your end. "The personal one is a family gathering, My mother wants me to be the host of the family gathering this month."

"And I come in where?"

"I usually stay isolated in my room because I can't stand the whole mood of the place, it's too chatty and noisy but now I have to host." He tsks shaking his head at the memory of the last family gathering.

"And you don't know how to, so you want my help?"

Levi nods, his expression serious. "In short, yes."

"Right, yeah so I still don't understand. Why don't you pick someone else, someone who you're already comfortable with" You ask, not knowing why he's asking you when he has a few friends of his own.

"Who says I'm not comfortable with you?" Levi gives you an incredulous look as if your question is absurd and the answer is obvious.

You can't help but raise an eyebrow at Levi's unexpected response. "Comfortable with me? You've been scowling at me since we met."

Levi offers a nonchalant shrug. "It's my default expression. I'm not a people person. You're the least annoying person I've met so far."

"um, thanks, I guess?"

Levi nods, his acknowledgment devoid of any neutrality. "Don't read too much into it."

You can't tell if he's being sarcastic or genuinely expressing a form of acceptance. Either way, you decide not to dwell on it too much. Levi is known for his stoic demeanor, and deciphering his feelings is like trying to read ancient hieroglyphs, so it's best not to read too much into it.

"Okay, and for the official one?"

"The official one," Levi starts, "is an award ceremony. One of my films is nominated for a few categories, and my presence is required as a formality."

"Congratulations? But then again you're not fond of award ceremonies, are you?" You nearly get up from your seat to give him a hug but refrain from doing so not wanting to cross any boundaries.

"Yeah, I couldn't care less, stupid pricks think they have the authority to judge whose art is superior. It's fucking bullshit" Levi's expression turns sour as he expresses his disdain for the award ceremony.

You sense the bitterness in his words while taking a sip of your tea and savoring the taste with a pleased hum, you realize that the world of awards and recognition might not be as glamorous and fulfilling as it seems. "I get it, awards don't define the value of your work. It's about the impact you make and the stories you tell, but you have to attend so that you gain the recognition you need and deserve, makes sense."

Levi nods in agreement, feeling warmth seeping through him as you are fond of the tea he brewed. "Exactly. Anyway, they're announcing the nominations for soundtracks too so keep an eye out for that."

"Yeah okay, that's cool, but also nerve-wracking" you admit already feeling the anxiety seeping in at the thought of the ceremony.

"Why? Because there are major actors?"

"No, the cameras, the judgments, the expectations, it all feels overwhelming," you reply, a hint of nervousness in your voice.

Levi gives you a side glance sipping on his tea and finishing what's left, his usual stern expression softening just a tad. "If you believe in your work, that's all that matters. They can go to hell with all their opinions."

You smile and nod, his words making sense as you push away any thoughts of negativity that may increase your anxiety. You think of thoughts to push back the unwanted ones and Levi seems to be the perfect solution. You can't help but stare at Levi, busy again with noting stuff down, his handwriting a mix of scribbles and cursives. How his fingers tend to be very pale and dainty, a taint of red on his knuckles from cracking them too much. How his hair falls on his face makes you want to part them away and tuck the strands behind his ears.

He looks up at you, sharp grey eyes boring into yours, eyebrows raised as a defense mechanism against the gaze you've been holding. You quickly avert your eyes and change your gaze, not wanting him to catch on.

"So which one is first and when is it?" you begin, trying to shift the focus back to the matter at hand.

"Family gathering, tomorrow at 7 pm" He answers.

"Tomorrow? You didn't think to give me a week's notice?"

Levi looks at you with a questioning gaze at your mildly surprised tone. "You and a week's notice is the same as a bouncing ball in a minefield, you'd eventually worry yourself to death with your overthinking tendencies."

"Overthinking is true but the meals need more time. so anything I need to know about the gathering, will I be the only non-family there?" you inquired, curious to know how awkward it will be.

"One, the meals are already prepared by a chef I hired. and two, no, one of my cousins, the brat, brings over all of her friends and it becomes a whole noise-fest, so you wouldn't be the only non-family," he explained, annoyance forming on his face as he recalled the headaches he's endured over the years.

You nod, mentally noting the details. "Got it. And the award ceremony?"

Levi glances at his calendar. "That's in two weeks. You'll need to clear your schedule for the whole day because it's far, the event starts in the evening."

"Alright, I'll make sure I'm available, Anything else I should be prepared for?", you reply, thinking about the preparations you'll need to make for both occasions.

Levi shrugs, "Just the usual chitter-chatter film industry shit. Red carpet, photographers, people pretending to be interested in conversations they're having when really they're full of shit."

You nod, "Got it, it's all just a show."

Levi nods as his facial features lightly soften. "More or less, It's all about appearances, which is why I rarely attend these things willingly."

"Okay, so tomorrow at 7 pm but I should come earlier, right? here at your place, no overthinking and I'm guessing the attire is casual?" You ask listing all the things you're required of.

Levi nods, "Casual is fine. Nothing too fancy and nothing too casual Just don't show up in pajamas, and we should be good."

You smirk teasing him a little, "Okay, I'll save the pajamas for the award ceremony then."

"But wait a minute, what's in this for me?" You ask slyly poking at him to see what he might offer you. You need everything he can offer to give you at this point.

Levi relaxes into his chair and crosses his arms, seemingly intrigued by your banter. "What do you mean, what's in it for you?"

You chuckle, enjoying the banter between you two. "Well, I'm doing you a favor by being your plus one. I think I deserve something in return."

Levi gives you a blank stare, the corners of his lips curling slightly. "And what would that something be?"

You pause for dramatic effect and also because you didn't think he'd play along before responding with a sly grin, "Two things, one, you'll call me by my first name, and two, you owe me dinner"

Levi deadpans at your demands, seemingly unamused. "Call you by your first name? That's negotiable. But dinner, you're practically dreaming."

"That's totally fine you can just forever be in debt."

Levi raises an eyebrow at your response, contemplating your proposal. There's a brief moment of silence, and you can almost sense the gears turning in his stoic demeanor. Finally, he lets out a 'tsk fine', a subtle way of saying 'I can't say no to you so do whatever you want'. You are too oblivious to see the stark contrast in Levi's behavior with you and with others, it's basically night and day. He treats you very differently, and though his stoicism remains, there's a peculiar comfort in the way he interacts with you. It's as if your presence manages to crack the surface of his usual 'idgaf' and 'the world bores me' attitude.

So, you like where you are right now, you like how things are going and you never want this chapter in your life to change. You've found a sense of fulfillment in your work, genuine friendships, and an interesting dynamic with Levi.

You're content.

Meanwhile on the other hand...

Eren wakes up disheveled, his hair now shorter and his moustache is long gone, shaved out of existence. He stands in the bathroom, already finished brushing his teeth and water droplets falling down his face, a product of washing his face. He looks at the mirror cabinet, deciding whether or not to take his pills. He decides not to, not being bothered to as he feels there's no point to it.

He doesn't want the stability of his moods or the functionality of his routine to actually work. It doesn't mean anything, at least not anymore.

He has two calendars, one plain white that is normal, he uses it to remember certain dates and important interviews that shape his career. The other calendar is reserved for you, your absence to be exact, he crosses out each day that passes without your captivating presence. Today it’s 4 years, 3 months, and 6 days. Every day at 7, he sits down by his desk, grabs both your calendar and his journal, and just writes how much he regrets what he did that day. He's gone through 7 journals so far and he writes for you, to you, and because of you.

He writes about how much he misses the music that used to fill his house when days were hard and he thought he couldn't get through them. How you were so patient and loving and that you didn't deserve anything that he put you through. He writes what reminds him of you, the tulips that bloom in the spring near his mom's house, the cherry blossoms he came across during his tour to Japan, or the jasmines he was gifted by an Indian fan during his trip there.

Everything comes back to you.

He feels so pathetic, so darn twisted to have said all those things to you, to have pushed you away and the worst part is, he doesn't even know why. He doesn't know whether or not to embrace the memories of your smiles, laughter, and the warmth of your presence or let it haunt him. Eren regrets the days when he let his issues take control and drive you far away from him, the days when he couldn't appreciate the simple joy of your company.

He would give everything to get you back again, but that's selfish of him, he thinks. He wants you to be happy, to live life, and never look back for him. He's torn between wanting you back in his life and acknowledging that it might be better for you to move on. The weight of his actions, the hurt he caused, and the bridge of friendship he destroyed between you and the rest of your friends are heavy burdens he carries.

Connie hates him to this day and rightfully so. So does Jean.

Eren used a recording of Connie that was taken out of context. The day of that recording was on your birthday and Connie was tired of the plain ol' happy birthday surprise because it wasn't surprising anyone. So he took it upon himself to spice things up. He decided that he'd have a fight with you the day before and the day after that he'd make a fake recording of him saying horrible things and once you got upset, he'd apologize and surprise you with your favorite flavored cake. He knew he'd get a few head smacks from you for even thinking about calling you a 'bitch' but all he really wanted was to hand-make the cake with the rest of your friend group and see you eat it half teary-eyed and laughing. But he decided against it after recording the audio, paranoid that it might actually drive you away so he resorted to just the plain non-surprising birthday party.

But no, Eren saved that recording even when Connie had deleted it from his phone. Eren drove you against everyone for mainly one reason, or rather two. Jealousy and insecurity.

Eren hated, he loathed, how you spend time with Jean, he despised how you looked at him with those beautiful eyes of yours, all doe-y and filled with admiration and love. You shouldn't be looking at horse-face like that, it should be him.

Eren believed he deserved your undivided attention, and the idea of you sharing those moments with Jean fuelled his jealousy. The insecurities within him festered, making him resentful of anyone who seemed to be close to you.

In an attempt to have you closer to him, Eren manipulated the situation, using Connie as a pawn in his scheme. The recording, taken out of context, became a weapon that not only hurt you but also fractured their own friendship. Connie, who was genuinely trying to create a memorable surprise, became an unknowing victim of Eren's envious tactics. This showed just how far Eren was willing to go to have you all to himself. He also had another recording of Jean also taken out of context but since he threatened Jean that he'd tell you everything, Jean thought it would be better to come out on his own terms.

But it all backfired. The fallout from his actions left a trail of broken friendships and severed ties. The fallout was severe. Connie was hurt and betrayed, harbored deep resentment towards Eren, rarely ever talking to him unless it was urgent. Connie's initial reaction was worse, first, he took it as a joke and brushed Jean off when he told him everything, and then when he entered your room to look for you, everything was wiped, your closets were empty, your gaming setup that was right next to his was completely clean, only the table remained and all Connie could see was red causing a huge fight between him and Eren.

Jean, too, felt the sting of betrayal as Eren's actions caused you to forever leave and leave them swimming in regret not only driving a wedge between friends but also leaving a lasting scar on the trust and happiness that existed between the entire friend group.

To say that they all miss you would be a heavy understatement. It's like you took away the sunshine and left them in a never-ending gloomy day. It's not the same without your crazy laughter and the way you made even the boring stuff fun. Everything's just kind of off now, and they can't shake the feeling that things got messed up for no good reason.

In the dead of night, when everything's quiet, each of them thinks about the good times and how quickly things went south. There's this heavy feeling of 'what if' hanging in the air, 'What if I never created that recording' 'What if I never told her how I truly felt about her in the past, would that have changed her decision' 'what if i didn't exist'. Eren especially can't get over the fact that he let someone as wonderful as you slip away for his own self-centered and insecure reasons.

Life moves on, yes, but it doesn't seem so in this context. Everything feels so dull, they don't have fun anymore, no one laughs genuinely, it's very awkward. Everyone wonders where you went, where you've been, how you are, if you're happy at least, and that if you are then they're happy too but they're still figuring out how to fix the mess. Your absence is this big, annoying elephant in the room. If your absence has taught them something it's that they should try to appreciate the people around them. Your absence is like a neon sign saying, "Don't fuck up."

Back to the present day time, Eren gets a text from Mikasa and he doesn't want to open it but does so that he doesn't get manhandled and thrown across the backyard.

Mikasa: get ready and be there me and auntie are already in the car driving

Mikasa: the address for the gathering is [Street Address/PO BOX], dress well pls

He groans into his pillow. Another stupid gathering, he thought he could get away from this year's gathering by traveling to America, a country where Mikasa's relatives aren't scattered around but no, the host of this year's gathering is Levi and he lives in America and specifically in the same state he traveled to. Eren can't even begin to express his annoyance. It's almost like the entire universe is against him not attending and he's not even related to anyone there. Why does he have to go, he thinks? Social events are the bane of his existence, ironic considering his whole career relies on interacting with people (fans).

Eren contemplates ignoring the text and pretending he never saw it. Maybe he can come up with a convincing excuse, like a sudden illness or something lame like 'I accidentally leaked the address, fans everywhere'. But he knows Mikasa too well – her persistence is unmatched. Ignoring her texts would only escalate the situation and so he responds with a 'fine, got it'.

He tosses his phone aside and stares at the ceiling. The prospect of facing another family gathering fills him with dread. It's not the family part that bothers him; it's the forced interactions, the fake smiles, and the constant questioning about his personal life. Resigned, he starts thinking about what to wear, already dreading the inevitable awkwardness that awaits him.

Eren makes sure to dress casually, opting for a comfortable yet presentable look. He styles his hair with a bit more care than usual, not wanting to appear too disheveled. As a final touch, he puts on his best cologne, he doesn't know why, but he feels compelled to dress properly, look proper, and act proper.

Almost as if there's something, or rather someone that's going to present tonight, that's worth impressing...

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

You woke up at 10 am and left for Levi's house at 1 pm, giving yourself a few good 6 hours to prepare everything. Levi insisted that you didn't need to come so early and that he's already setting up everything but you like these kinds of things so you tell him it's fine. He tells you to utilize the catering staff he hired and leave their job to them but you refuse. It's a 'family' gathering, it should have bits and pieces of his personality embedded into his effort as well.

You couldn't find some grey cutlery so you bought what you could find which happened to be some colorful plates to Levi's dismay but you promised him that you'd keep them and it wouldn't stay in his house for more than a few days. He sighs a 'tch' at you that you don't think much of. You waste no time and get to work immediately, unpacking the bags and organizing the items you bought. The colorful plates you've chosen might not match Levi's monochromatic taste, but you believe they add a lively touch to the gathering.

You proceed with setting up the dining area and arranging the colorful plates alongside the other tableware. The clash of colors against the neutral backdrop creates a unique aesthetic, one that you find oddly satisfying. Levi also starts his part in cleaning, which doesn't take long as he cleans his house on a regular basis.

The catering staff, initially unsure about your decisions, follows your lead. As you continue to work, Levi observes silently, occasionally offering input or preferences. Despite the clash of styles, a subtle understanding begins to fold and everyone likes the outcome of the collaboration between the expertise of the staff and your knowledge of Levi's tastes.

After a few good hours, everything is set and you go change from your 'helping out' clothes to your casual clothes for the event. The catering staff bid their goodbye and Levi takes a seat in the living room.

It is now 6:00 and Levi's mom and uncle arrive, you can hear their chatter from upstairs, a booming laugh can be heard and you assume it's his uncle. You've never been more nervous in your life. 'How should you greet them?' 'What if you look too casual' 'What if you say something wrong' are all the negative thoughts flowing through your mind right now. You take a deep breath, brush them aside, and head downstairs and you immediately happen to lock eyes with his mom, she sits on the couch with an amazing posture while Levi and his uncle bicker at the door. You wonder how Levi greeted his mom, too bad you missed it.

She looks so ethereal, with long healthy black hair flowing nicely with the white dress she's wearing, and her facial features are soft and delicate, she looks like the kindest person ever, she radiates this sort of 'welcome' feeling. As if she'll accept you in your arms, sinner or priest.

You snap out of it, stopping the gawking, and continue to walk up to her. She instantly smiles and gets up from the couch.

"Who is this young pretty lady?" Levi's mom exclaims with a warm smile, her eyes sparkling with genuine curiosity. You feel a mix of relief and nervousness as you extend a hand towards her.

"Hello Ma'am, I'm [Name]," you say, trying to match her warmth. "I'm a friend and co-worker of Levi's. It's a pleasure to finally meet you."

"Ma'am?" She laughs a hearty laugh and pats you gently on the shoulders "Sweetie, there's no need to be so formal, You can just call me Kuchel"

"It's nice to meet you, Ms. Kuchel" you reply, not bringing yourself to call someone much older than you by just their first name.

"You're a cheeky lady, aren't you?" Kuchel jokes with you, giving you an affectionate smile and you finally understand what the term 'girl crush' means because you've never been so positively intimidated by someone's elegance and stance. She urges you to sit down when in reality you should be the one urging her to sit down and making her feel comfortable.

Levi and his uncle also come by to sit down before he introduces himself to you.

"How's it going, little lady? I'm Kenny. I'm this kid's uncle, regrettably" he says with a smirk, causing Levi to roll his eyes and Kuchel to slap his arm playfully.

"Hello, I'm [Name], I work alongside Levi and we're also friends." Levi glances at you to see if you're uncomfortable in any way, he's good at reading people and you seem, relaxed and not tense as he predicted you'd be. He mentally nods at that and reminds himself to glance at you every now and then.

Kuchel smiles warmly at you. "It's wonderful to have you here, [Name]. I'm glad he's becoming friends with coworkers, he usually never does that"

"Mom, I'm 28, stop talking about me like I'm 15" Levi groans at the embarrassment, hands digging into his face.

"You're still my baby boy, no matter how old you get." She retorts, moving closer to him to pinch his cheeks and coddle him.

You coo at the rare sight, of Levi crossing his arms while his mother hugs him and strokes his hair, it's obvious Levi loves the affection his mother gives him, his fond smile gives it away no matter how grey his eyes look.

His uncle also seems to enjoy the sight, smiling a faint one as he catches you observing him. He flashes you a wink before looking back at the scene. You feel less tense now, feeling more welcome with the whole atmosphere.

It's now 7:15 and the first batch of relatives come out of a minivan, you smile and they somehow hug you as if you're a part of the family, one elderly woman asks if you're Levi's other half and you can't help but stutter on your words as you form incoherent sentences you later resort to shaking your head as a form of no.

It's now 8:15, an hour has passed and everyone is eating their starters, you look at the lively atmosphere and you feel so warm inside, everyone knows one another and everyone treats you like a relative, you feel like you belong before the doorbell rings again and you tell them that you'll go get it.

Nothing could've prepared you for who was behind that door.

You quickly open the door and get your clothing stuck on the handle of the door by opening it too quickly. You manage to say your hellos but your focus is on the door, trying to get out of this embarrassing situation.

"[Name], What’re you doing here?" a voice asks and you think it's Kuchel but once you finally get your clothing unstuck from the door and look up at the new batch of guests, you're astronomically wrong.

It's Carla, It's Carla Jaeger.

You've never thought you'd see Carla of all people here, you think you're hallucinating and that the presence of Kuchel may have triggered your longing for the mother figure who treated you like you were her daughter.

But no, it's actually Carla. How could this be and why? She's standing in front of the door with a fluffy scarf and a huge coat that hides her actual outfit. She stares at you with sadness in her eyes, but then Kuchel shouts 'Carla come in' which makes you snap out of it and open the door so that she may enter. She does so and as you try to close the door she tells you that..

"There's one more person"

And cue the anxiety, panic, and dread. You look at her, confused and worried. Carla immediately embraces you with a tight hug, as if seeking comfort or offering it, you're not sure. She cups your face gently, looking into your eyes with a mixture of affection and sorrow.

"[Name], You've grown up."

Carla whispers, her voice a mixture of sorrow and longing. The memories flood back – the warmth of her hugs, the wisdom in her advice, and the unconditional love she showered upon you. The times she'd teach you how to bake and you'd end up messing the whole thing up and she'd laugh at you while teasing.

"You look more refined" she continues, her gaze filled with a motherly pride. Carla steps back, holding your shoulders as she examines you. "But the same twinkle in your eyes remains."

"Thank you, Auntie" you reply not knowing what else, a pang of guilt heaving in your heart as you mentally embrace yourself for the person who accompanied her as the doorbell rings again.

please don't be eren, please don't be eren, please don't be eren

This is what you keep chanting in your mind as Carla gestures towards the door, indicating that you should answer it. As you open the door, you're met with the face of the person who accompanied her.

It's not Eren. Thank God

It's Mikasa.

You mentally smack yourself on the head, how could you have not known? Mikasa Ackerman, Levi Ackerman. What more clues did you need? A big red billboard?

Mikasa carries two baskets of what seems to be treats for everyone at the family gathering. She doesn’t seem to notice you since you're practically hiding behind the door as she goes forward to set the gifts down at the kitchen island and give greetings to her relatives.

Taking your invisibility to her as an advantage, you close the door not wanting the cold to get into the warmed house, and wonder where you should go and you decide you’ll go upstairs to get some fresh air, calm your nerves, and focus on the priority here.

You run up the stairs and go to the nearest bathroom, you’re pacing around not knowing what to do. You think let’s rewind a bit.

Now we know that Mikasa is related to Levi, check. Does that guarantee that anyone else who you’ve left behind could also be here, no. But why is Carla here then?

And that’s where you’re stumped. You have no clue. And you don’t want this to ruin your image with the people you just met, for you to just run off out of nowhere because someone you know is in the same room as you. You’re not like this, this is the anxiety talking. So what know them? Say your hellos and look the other way, it’s very simple.

You slap your face gently as if to beat the words into your face, that’s until you hear a booming noise from downstairs, it sounds like someone is cheering. Anyways, you think, let’s get back to this gathering. Whoever comes, came and whoever is not present well then that’s a win for us.

And with that you head downstairs, slowly observing the table where everyone is seated at, Levi with his armed crosses, Kuchel with her hand on his head, Kenny bored out of his mind and Carla exchanging smiles with Kuchel. The other relatives seem to chatter among themselves.

You quickly head down the stairs and grab a plate to get yourself some food. Carla comes along behind you, she follows what you do, also grabbing a plate and putting food on her plate.

“So how has life been treating you, [Name]?”

She asks, genuine curiosity flowing through her voice, you look at her and put your plate down to show some respect and talk to her.

“It’s going great, I’m graduating in a few weeks.” You reply, observing her features, she hasn’t changed a bit, she looks just as comforting as before. She smiles at that and pats your back.

“I’m proud of you sweetie. You deserve everything good in this life and the next”

You smile and hug her abruptly, the connection you had with Carla was unmatched, nothing could top that and you just feel so guilty for not telling her anything beforehand.

“Listen, [Name], As a mother, I need to apologize.” You look at her confused and she continues with heavy words. “I never got the chance to apologize to you for Eren’s behavior that day, if I double-checked whether or not he took his medication, perhaps this wouldn’t have become the outcome.”

“Auntie, this is in no way your fault. This was my decision, I’d like to think that either way, I would’ve left. It’s just the terms I left on could’ve been improved, but that��s also my fault. I just combined everyone in the same category as Eren and left without further notice. That’s a fault on my part.”

"Nonsense, none of this could ever be your fault." She smiles and pats your cheek,“The ever so kind [Name], you have a heart pure as the driven snow.”

You appreciate her words but can't shake the feeling that you could have handled things differently. All the guilt and regret start pouring in, you've left so many people under the assumption that they hated you, Carla was one of them, you thought that if her son despised you enough to hurt you, then what would be stopping her?

Carla seems to sense your troubled self so she takes it upon herself to make the mood more friendly and less soggy with regret. She's seen how regretful both you and Eren look and it's so dreadful as his mother and as someone who cares about you. She tries to lighten his mood up, take him to places where serotonin may be boosted, and engage with him in activities that liven things up, but to no avail. Eren was stuck in a trance of regret.

Carla wishes she could ask you to at least talk with Eren or sort things out with him. Her motherly side worried about the wellbeing of her son but she can't bring herself to do so, it's too much on you and selfish of her.

"My kitchen is in good shape, I know for a fact that it has missed your mishaps," Carla says with a playful glint in her eyes, attempting to bring a smile to your face.

"Mishaps? More like nuclear testings" you respond with a chuckle, appreciating Carla's effort to lighten the mood. Her warm demeanor and easygoing nature make you feel more at ease, at least for the moment.

Kuchel calls Carla over once more, she has a glass of red wine and she seems like she has lots of things to catch up with her. Carla gives you a nod before heading over to her and taking her plate of food on the way.

You take a moment to collect yourself, glancing around the room. Levi is engaged in a conversation with his uncle Kenny and Mikasa is on her phone. You take this as an opportunity to clean the dishes, left by the guests as they head to the living room to watch a sitcom together.

It's now 8:50. it's almost two hours past the intended time, you can let out a deep sigh of relief. No one else is coming and everyone here is sleeping here for the night. Washing the dishes calms your nerves and you feel more relaxed, you hope that Mikasa stays on her phone and does not notice you. That'd be great, but the chances of someone not noticing another in a 'family gathering' are very low. She'll probably notice one way or another.

You finish the dishes, dry your hands, and allow the families to enjoy their own company. You, however, make your way to the small seating area, opposite to the door. You grab a book from the shelf and start reading, taking your mind off all this.

In the process, 20 minutes have passed and it's now 9:30, you giggle at the book, you never knew Levi was into comedy like this, half the books on the shelf are comedy and satire books. You put a hand over your mouth to conceal your chuckles as you continue reading. The sound of laughter and conversations from the living room serves as a comforting backdrop. Despite the initial nervousness, being immersed in Levi's world, even if just through his book collection, brings a sense of belonging.

Until the doorbell rings once more.

You're on the other side of the room so it'll take a bit longer for you to open it but as soon as you get up, Mikasa is running to the door to open it. Why would she be running when she was on her phone the entire time? You're just standing there a bit confused at who it is and why 2 hours after the initial time.

Mikasa opens the door and the room suddenly turns into an incoherent noise factory. You can't see who it is because they immediately hug Mikasa but you'd recognize that grey hair anywhere.

It's Connie and behind him are Jean, Sasha, Historia, Ymir, and Reiner.

Mikasa steps back, breaking the hug, and the noise reaches a peak as everyone starts talking at once. Connie, always the ball of energy, is the first to greet everyone, Levi leaves him hanging on his fist bump and he doesn't mind as he goes on to greet everybody else.

You don't dare move from your spot continuing reading your book hoping to stay unnoticed in your little corner of the room. As everyone continues their greetings and catching up, you bury yourself in the book, pretending to be engrossed in the words on the pages. You hear Historia apologizing for being late as the roads were blocked due to snow.

The minutes pass, and you start to believe that your plan to remain inconspicuous is working. That is until you hear a familiar voice entering the room, and a chill runs down your spine. The voice is unmistakable, and dread creeps in as you hope it's just a figment of your imagination.

Eren stands there awkwardly, pathetically fidgeting with his hands as he mumbles 'Sorry I'm late'. Kuchel hugs him and playfully pinches his cheeks and he shyly averts his gaze down. You take this as a small chance to observe him from the peek of your book.

He grew a bit taller, his hair was styled to a fashionable degree, and his face was glowing although his eyes seemed dark from his eyebags as if he hadn't been getting much sleep. His azure eyes aren't as dull as you last saw them, they're still a bit dull but the color stands out more. He looks disconnected from the rest of his friends and Mikasa pulls his arm to bring him closer.

You should've picked a more discreet place but then again why should you be hiding, it's just a coincidence that all of you happen to be reunited here. However you don't want any drama, you contemplate leaving through the back door and telling Levi something urgent came up but you don't want to let him down and there's no point in doing so if you so claim to have forgotten about them, meeting them, saying hello and disappearing again shouldn't be so hard. Maybe, just maybe, you can enjoy the evening without the complication of facing them. The minutes tick by, and your hope grows. Perhaps, for once, fate is on your side.

It's as if everything is happening in slow motion, the laughter of Carla and Kuchel, Connie play fighting with Levi's uncle and Historia chatting to the elderly family members. You glance once more from between the book and you see that their attention is elsewhere. You get a text from your roommate who happens to tell you that all the roads are blocked due to a snowstorm in the area and wondering if you're safe.

you: yes i'm fine, are you at home?

claudia: yeah, it seems like you have to stay where you are until the snow dies down, don't try to go anywhere, kay?

You seem worried a bit, wondering if your friends are also at home and not outside, you check the news and it calmly urges anyone and everyone who is outside to get inside and people who are inside to stay inside.

you: damn, it looks bad out there, how's everyone, are they all inside?? i can't get through to them.

claudia: [one attachment], we're fine, see u at home tmrw. stay safe!!

You open the attachment to see all of your friends huddling in the room, windows closed and all in oodies giving the camera a big thumbs up and smiling.

You smile at that, responding with an 'okay' and sighing a deep breath as all of your friends are safe. You're convinced the universe is against you, making you trapped in a house with people you want to run away from. You can't stand the anxiety that comes with it, you put the book down and hear the distant chatters of Levi's family members telling each other about the news as they put on the news channel.

You need a drink, you think to yourself. You quietly slip away from your corner, avoiding making any noise as you make your way to the kitchen. The distant chatter and laughter follow you, but you try to drown it out. You open the fridge, and fortunately, there's an array of beverages. You grab a bottle of water, thinking that's probably a safer choice but then you put it back as wine seems like a better option in this situation.

While you're being indecisive, it seems that someone else has entered the kitchen, they have their back to you, and you see the mini man bun and immediately know it's Eren. He hasn't noticed you yet, he thinks you're just a random family member also in the kitchen, choosing some snacks, but he has trouble finding the cork opener for the wine bottle he's about to open. He can't go back and ask Levi in front of everyone because he knows his mom. will scold him for trying to drink. So he resorts to asking a stranger, you, instead to save him that trouble.

"um, excuse me?" He starts looking at your back as you attempt to leave the kitchen stealthily, sneaking quietly past the cabinets and stuffing your face in one of them. You freeze at the sound of Eren's voice. The last thing you wanted was to become involved in his search for a corkscrew. In an attempt to avoid the impending interaction, you continue pretending to browse the snacks.

"Excuse me," he repeats, a touch of frustration in his voice.

You debate whether to respond or slip away unnoticed. The room suddenly feels smaller, you feel claustrophobic and you wish you had chosen a different place to hide from the social storm. I mean, why would you go to the kitchen when they just arrived on an empty stomach?

Eren decides to approach you, still unaware of your identity, he lightly taps you on your shoulder. "Do you know where the corkscrew is?" he asks, coming up beside you and you swear this feels like a scene straight out of a Kdrama, one of those awkward side-character interactions that you'd rather avoid. Panic sets in, and you need to think and act quickly. Holding your breath, you contemplate the best course of action.

Escape seems like a tempting option. You scold yourself for feeling afraid and decide that avoiding unnecessary drama is your priority. Without turning around to face him, you respond vaguely, slightly changing your voice.

"I think I saw it near the sink," gesturing vaguely in that direction.

You sigh a loud deep breath as he heads in that direction but immediately suck it back in. As you are walking backward, you bump into someone, you pray it's someone you don't know but by reflex, you turn around to see who you bumped into and come face to face with a groaning Connie. He has his hand on his arm after he hits it on the corner of the wall and looks up at you only to have the annoyance etched on his face disappear within a millisecond.

He stands there speechless, unable to say your name, unable to even understand the whole situation, is it real? or did he play fight with Kenny a bit too hard? He can't do anything but stand there. He takes you in, every part of you and it finally hits him like a wave of strong tides. He missed you so badly, all this time, he never truly understood how much your absence affected him. The sight of you, the sound of your voice as you mutter a small 'oh', the simple act of bumping into you – it's a flood of emotions he tried to suppress.

"Hello and sorry."

Is all you say, in a monotone voice, a stark contrast to the emotional whirlwind that's taking place within you. You grab a packet of chips and purposefully move away, creating a physical distance between the two of you. You move behind him because behind you is Eren opening a bottle of wine and glancing at the whole accident, still oblivious.

Connie scoffs at your attitude, he's immediately snapped out of his trance and feels the need to confront you. You haven't even bothered to hear his side of the story, or given him a chance to explain and it's so fucking annoying.

"Sorry for bumping into me or sorry for going no contact for like half a decade, hm?" he questions, his tone carrying a mix of sarcasm and genuine hurt. The confrontation hangs in the air, and you can feel the weight of his unspoken emotions.

You want to retort back but you know that this will just lead to confrontation on a wide scale and you don't want to ruin Levi's hard work. So you ignore him and go back to sitting down on your small chair in the corner and Connie can't believe you're actually acting like this. He watches you leave to sit down on a small chair and he's so pissed. He glances at Eren who seems to be in his own world, scrolling on his phone and drinking his wine and suddenly Connie feels like starting a fight because Eren's nonchalant attitude irks him. But he refrains, he has something else to do, something better. Connie takes the opportunity to shift the attention to the living room. He interrupts Sasha's karaoke performance in front of the TV, grabbing the microphone with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Guys, I know someone with a much better voice in this house, so who wants to listen to some real music?" He declares and Sasha pouts but lets go of the microphone. This causes Jean to tell him to stop being so rowdy and sit down. He shakes his head telling them 'You guys don't want to miss out, I promise' and they seem a bit curious at his offer, wanting to know who it is.

You think he's already gone, ignoring you as well since he never liked you in your memory so you take a breath of fresh air and continue reading while glancing at Eren who drinks the wine slowly while scrolling on his phone, replying to texts from his manager asking him on his opinion of certain costumes. He looks dreadful you almost pity him.

"It's [Name]" Connie announces, and there's a mix of surprise and curiosity that spreads among the family members. One, because half of them didn't know you could sing and the other half is reactions from Carla who knows where this is going and connected the dots, and Jean and the rest because they had no idea that you're here, so they scoff at him and tell him to stop playing.

"Come see for yourself, then" He taunts and now everyone is really confused.

Eren hears your name being said and his head immediately perks up from his distracted state. He sets down the wine glass, his eyes narrowing as he searches the room for confirmation. He goes to the living room to see a glimpse of your face but you're not there. He then proceeds to return back to his spot disappointed but stops in his tracks as he sees you, sitting down on a small chair right behind the table he was drinking wine at. He's not like Connie, he stares at you with guilt in his eyes, you know you can't hide behind your book for so long so you set it down and look at him with an annoyed gaze as Connie and the others also turn around the corner of the kitchen, surprised to see you there.

Eren feels.. weird, he feels so pathetic, he feels like he’s gonna cry any minute now, going to full-on sob in front of everyone. Your annoyed gaze tells him everything he needs to know, he wants to fall on his knees and grovel, wants to tell you he'd do everything and anything to make it up to you, he places a hand on his mouth, almost to stop himself from revealing the overwhelming emotions threatening to spill out.

Everyone else seems to look at you with the same gaze, regret, confusion, guilt, surprise. Connie, crosses his arms, half pissed at you for what happened but also happy now that he knows you've been okay, Eren looks troubled like he doesn't know where to start, Mikasa has this face on that you can't read, Historia is in a state of surprise, Jean doesn't believe his eyes and Sasha and Ymir are so confused.

You don't know how to feel, you hate how everyone just put you on the spot, how you are indirectly ruining Levi's first time hosting this gathering, but most of all, you hate how much their presence affects you.

You don't do much but look outside at the snowstorm, and then tension grows higher and tighter with each second, you hate how they look at you like you are some animal in an enclosure, like a performer and people are patiently waiting for your next trick, it feels too awkward and makes it hard to breathe, you can't help but wonder if somehow standing in the snowstorm seems like a better option than standing in the storm brewing inside this house.

notes: first things first, thank you all for reading the part 1, I really appreciate it and to those who interacted, hope that nothing inconveniences you ever again in your life!! emphasis on ever. so here's to part two, crazy how it's 9K because I remember my milestone being 5K so how I got here is honestly mindblowing. I'm glad you liked my plot, I thought it might've been weirdly put but it seems not. so I hope you enjoy this one as well and let me know if you also want a part 3, I kind of left it on a cliffhanger...

divider credit: @hitobaby

#saber reads #saber reads aot #euorian 🖤

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