flyboypoedameron

[flyboypoedameron]

Empire Now really said you can't give up the struggle because there's always hope for the future, you can't give up because your actions matter like it or not, they have the power but we have the numbers and we will make things better no matter what. Empire Now really said empires always fall and to rebel you must always have hope

[flyboypoedameron]

Poe's gaze fell to the floor, he had heard the others footsteps quiet as he digested the request. The silence thick in the air and Poe could only hear his pounding heartbeat in his ears. Shit. Why did you even mention anything.... stupid stupid stupid

When the other began to speak, his breath caught in his chest. Wringing his hands in his lap as he sat on the edge of the bed, there was a glimmer of hope there. He hadn't said no, but he still needed time to be trusted. He opened his lips and softly uttered a wisp of"yes-of course"

With that Kylo had exited the room, the soft hydraulics of the door hissing after him.

"You'll need to familiarize yourself with my ships if you even want to think about flying again" he mimicked softly, though he waited quite a few minutes after the other had left him, not daring to be caught stepping out of line. He groaned as he lowered himself back to the bed, and starred at the ceiling. "if you even want to think about flying again" it echoed in his head. Over. and Over again.

If. You. Ever. Want. To. Think. About. Flying. Again.

He knew --he was almost positive Ren wouldn't keep him grounded. He was too valuable in the skies to have his wings clipped. If he could just show him. Prove to him that --- in good time. He just needed to be strategic about it. But not too pushy....

He spent what felt like an hour or two laying on the bed, burning a hole in the ceiling with his gaze. "Kriff this is tedious" he muttered, wincing as he rolled over and stood up. Bracing himself on the end of the bed as his vision stabilized. Of course he was in no way fit to fly or even try any sort of trainings. His eyes fell on the shelves of tomes and artifacts Kylo had adorned his room with, he was determined to at least study something today. He picked up the first thing that he deemed interesting enough, hobbled back to the bed and settled in.

----

He must've dozed off, the subject must not have been as interesting as he previously had thought. He woke with a start, Ren was panting heavily at the door. Bolting upright he groaned, when would he learn to sit up slowly after their sessions?

He braced himself and stood from the bed, "Is--what's wrong---what's happened?" brows knitting together as he watched the others movements, the caution he had looking around and entering the quarters.

What were you doing? He cocked his head slightly to the side, Seen anything? Anyone? " I don't know what you mean---I haven't --I've just woken up---accidentally slipped into a nap it seems." he motioned to the bed where an old book lay open, the sheets around wrinkled and bunched after fitful sleep.

He rubbed his eyes as if that would help him in understanding what was going on. He wanted to go to him, but he was ---frightened? No. Apprehensive? Perhaps. Cautious?...maybe that was the best term for his feeling. He took a tentative step forward, raising a hand to gently point at the man where the dried blood was. " Are you hurt?---do you need me to get the medpack?"

His steps paused at the request and turning his head not completely around, but to the side with his chin over his shoulder, hair obscuring his face from view. After all the focus and time he'd been putting into Poe, helping him, fixing him. Cleansing the falsehoods the rebels had been feeding to him. That his own mother had been feeding to him.

All of that.. And he had almost been content letting his beautiful mind inside that pretty head just.. rot away without any enrichment... Maybe that was why his mother wasn't keen on letting him have a pet as a child.

His mouth, barely seen, looked like it may have parted as if to speak, but nothing but silence followed Poe's question. He couldn't just act as though he forgotten something like that. After all, in reality, Poe had been treated worse than typical prisoners of the First Order. After all this time, he'd been left alive still, for Ren. After all this time, finding himself staring into those familiar brown eyes felt like...some indescribably distorted longing...a scattered dream that's like a far off memory... And every time he tried to think about it longer, every time he tried to chase that feeling, those thoughts, he'd simply seem to drive himself mad, or make himself mad. It was hard to say if the two were mutually exclusive or not. Regardless, those outcomes were never good for the ship, or those who worked on it.

He had done far better keeping his temper aboard the Steadfast compared to the Finalizer,but he was in a completely different station of power, different goals now than before. Different help.

"- You're far too intelligent to let have access to just anything." His voice finally spoke up, turning enough to see the way the other was seeming to hide almost. The fact he needed to, the fact he did ask Ren for something had... warmed him inside. "You'll need to familiarize yourself with my ships if you even want to think about flying again, and your reaction times will need to be retrained among other things." For a moment, he could see the pain the other had been in, wanting to brush off the request as if it were nothing and go about his day, send someone in to administer-- But the thought of someone else being so close to Poe while he was this delicate, this injured. He didn't trust it. He didn't trust Poe, and he didn't trust the people on this ship enough. Not until he knew Poe was his.

He didn't outright accept or deny Poe's request, simply leaving it at that before click of his boots on the floor could be heard as he left.

Snoke was no more to him. He was no longer supposed to be in his head, influencing him, spreading him lies and altering reality for him. He was dead. He had killed him. He had ensured that. There was peace that settled in him after that even. But not the kind of peace he had wished and wanted. Every action, every interaction, he still heard him, he felt him. His influence. Insistance it was all against him, that every action he made was wrong, because it wasn't what he said to. That he is, has been, and will continue to be alone. Especially now with what he's caused, how far he had taken things after usurping Snoke. Without something, someone able to hold him back on some form of leash, or at least calm him down, he often fell victim to his own emotions and broken mind, and it was only a matter of time before it inevitable showed within the Order. ----- Poe had been left completely on his own in Ren's own quarters, amongst the myriad of belongings that seemed almsopt out of place for The First Order itself. No one had come to clean, nor to tend to anything with him as mentioned, nor did he return only a few hours later. For Poe had he the courage or curiosity, had near free range of the area. At least Poe had access to water and some rations if he really needed or dared. Though it wasn't until over half a days hours passed when the man may have found himself in the presence of another once again.

The door was open much faster and with much more force then the mechanics in the doors typically gave. There stoo Ren, far less put together than he should have been for a day that had seemed to have little going on. His hand pressed the frame of the doorway, the way he leaned against it, with his other with his arm out clear he had been the one to force it open the way it had.

"Poe-" Ren spoke loudly as he entered, panting loudly while out of breath as he looked around cautiously like he was expecting, or looking, for something. He was drenched in sweat and dirt, hair pushed back out of his face. A clear look at him showed he had been bruised and battered in some way. He looked and felt on edge and angered, nothing had been going well for him by the looks of it.

One clear look at him it was visible he stood there battered and bruised, his own with tears and what looked like was stains of dried blood. That part was difficult to tell whether it could have been his own or anothers, as any open wounds seemed to stop bleeding or have been tended to.

"You're here." He took a step in, breathing heavily still as he stepped in. "Here alone.. " He turned his head toward the door and motioned for it to close as multiple sets of footsteps down the halls were cut off. He winced slightly, gritting his teeth in a moment of pain. "What were you doing?" The way he spoke had sounded accusatory almost, as if Poe was in some sort of trouble with him. "You haven't seen anything? Anyone?"

#caelumangeli #Poe is like damnit I was asleep wtf is happening #why are you dirty #why is there blood

[flyboypoedameron]

Poe's brows furrowed as he opened his eyes, still not meeting hers. Had he heard her correctly? Cage Fights?

Well that was certainly a form of distraction. He couldn't say he wouldn't enjoy watching some mind numbing fights. He couldn't admit to her that he had thought about partaking in those very same cage fights previously.

"I've been known to observe a few matches here and there, mostly in passing, you know, can't stay in one place too long." He shrugged a little and brought his gaze to her finally, and a faint hint of a smile graced the corners of his lips, "consider my interest piqued."

Shaking his head side to side, his shoulders slumped forward slightly, of course he should have this conversation with Leia, but he could never bring himself to do it.

"Nah- I'm just--it's fine because I'll probably end up blowing myself up before I even have to chance to inherit the title of anything other than Squad Leader" he rearranged his seated position, leaning his back against the wall and avoiding eye contact with her.

He knew she was right, she usually was, but he just wanted to wallow.

"Look, I've prattled on long enough about my woes....let's talk about something else for now yeah? I'm just going to dig myself deeper into this pit of despair...so distract me....please?"

#therapardalis #mr adrenaline junky

[flyboypoedameron]

** crawls out of my hole and looks around** hello! I am briefly back, work has been crazy, Im prepping things for my move in August and trying to keep my stupid brain happy.

I will try to get some drafts drafted tonight and I hope to be here more consistently soon! I miss all of you <3

#mun post #i can queue anything

[flyboypoedameron]

I TAKE MY WHISKEY NEAT MY COFFEE BLACK AND MY BED AT THREE YOU'RE TOO SWEET FOR ME 🎶

#im going to be insufferable again #but did i ever stop

[flyboypoedameron]

Oscar Isaac on The Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon

(2024-01-22)

[flyboypoedameron]

It is the day of my birth and so I am plaguing you all with my face

Also apologies for being so sparse here, life has beaten me down the past few months! I shall return soon ( probably also sporadically to start) !

#mun post #munface #its my birfday

[flyboypoedameron]

Vote now on your datapads

[flyboypoedameron]

It's my 8 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

(( I guess I've had this blog for 8 years????!!!--- not my oldest one, but the one that's still active at least))

#8 year tumblrversary #tumblr milestone

[flyboypoedameron]

"Hi Santa," Thera leaned in, the bells on her outfit chiming softly, "can I sit on your lap and tell you what I want?"

This year, to boost morale and give something to the kids on base, Poe had organized a small event for holiday celebrations. He had heard of far off civilizations celebrating with a jolly character that went by the name of Santa Claus. He read up on all there was to read on his holopads during downtimes on his missions, and got everything together with the help of Thera.

The children were all very excited, they heard about the prospect of presents so they needed little convincing. He had even roped BB8 in on the fun. He had been fixing the antlers on BB8s antenna as his attention was directed towards the approaching woman.

Poe let out a hearty Ho Ho Ho with a slight chuckle as she got closer. Taking a sip from his mug, some kind of chocolatey concoction, he heard her words and nearly choked on the beverage.

His eyes widened and he tried to control his coughing, shifting in his seat nervously as people were starting to stare.

Eyes turning to Thera, " That was-- that's not fair there are /children/ here." He playfully scolded, all the while he was trying to stop his cheeks from reddening anymore than they already had.

#therapaldis #christmas time #santa baby #omg he is so mad but also not mad

[flyboypoedameron]

///

/ weeee okay sorry guys I kind of disappeared. Im not fully back yet, Ive got a lot of things to finish up this week, but I went on a smol weekend trip to Chicago this past weekend. So I've been a little MIA!

I will be back to posting soon-ish

#ooc

[flyboypoedameron]

In honor of SPOTIFY WRAPPED,  send me a number 1-100 and I’ll write you a starter based on the song.

[flyboypoedameron]

//tried for replies tonight, didn't quite work, so gonna say tomorrow is the day after work hopefully!

Gonna lurk for a little bit so shoot me a message if you want to collab or just chat ☺️

#ooc #mun speaks

[flyboypoedameron]

Neck™️ ft. necklace 

[flyboypoedameron]

gif challenge | vs. @wandasmaximoff round two • favourite star wars character + complementary colors

[flyboypoedameron]

[flyboypoedameron]

// do therapy they said, it will help you heal they said. 9 hours later and I'm starting to feel like a person again. Stored childhood trauma is no fucking joke guys. I've been nauseous and felt like death most of the day just because my body didn't want to go down that path today I guess.

Oooof

#ooc #i'll be lurking probs