gempisces

[gempisces]

Thoughts of the beginning of July <3

So since July 1st, I’m glad to say I’ve been chilling. I, for one, have put the phone down on even trying by to write (cuz a girl can’t)

But during the summer I’ve 1. Changed jobs, 2. I shaved the ends of my eyebrows off (and it’s giving). So far I can’t lie, I’ve been enjoying summer, had some personal family shit fucking me over too though at first. But thankfully I got through it, just barely thanks to my good ole friends.

Ever since all of that I’ve been chilling and relaxing cause this is the last month before school. About like 3 days ago I had a self improvement moment (at one in the morning) as I scrolled on TikTok. It went from makeup, to fashion, and then to like personal scents and just shit that’ll make me feel good. On tiktoker I have been watching is @b_clasyy, and let me tell y’all (if there is a y’all) her videos have definitely made me want to turn my lil shit show of a life around.

Since Monday of this week, I’ve been doing a Pilates routine and it feels so refreshing. After doing a 20 min video of the pilates I like to check on the progress. And when I recorded the video, my stomach was flatter and definitely was more toned. Now I’m a lanky and kinda skinny girl but I still have unwanted fat on my body ! I even got me a lil pink workout mat to really feel involved.

I never realized it but I feel like honestly my vision board (that I made like a good 2 months ago I think) is lowkey coming into place. I’m probably gonna redo it for the end of this year since now I’m a senior in hs and stuff.

I’ve been trying to push down the feeling and yknow not let it take over but damn. I just want a boyfriend. Now currently I’m the only single one of my trio, and like I’m really glad that my friends are happy. Some time during like Valentine’s Day, I felt soooo like unhappy with the fact that like I couldn’t ever seem to get anybody. I don’t have talking stages or anything like that. Skip to now and I’ve accepted it a lot better, so now I’m focusing on myself. Cause I can’t lie I wanna meet my husband. Fuck a boyfriend.

I ain’t gonna be having no time to hop around in relationships and shit, plus it’s not my type of thing anyways. But besides that, Tiktok has def filled my delulu a bit more. All this weekend my for you page was filled with like tarot readings (cause I fuck with that type of stuff and all) and messages saying stuff about someone is like stalking my social media, and they wanna be in a relationship and shit. But

I’m a damned introvert. And if they is, I’ll just have to take the spot which I can do.

Anyways ima end it here before I start ranting tooo much. Goodbye to people I don’t know, or no one at all 🌸

#july #check in #boredom #black girl journaling #journal #random