helldiver-diva

[helldiver-diva]

helldivers 2? i hardly KNOW hers 2

#reblog #helldivers #helldivers 2

[helldiver-diva]

I AM ORDERED BY MY SUPERIORS TO TELL YOU ALL THAT THIS IS AN EPIC APRIL FOOLS JOKE AND NOT AN ONGOING AUTOMATON DATA BREACH IN MY SUPER DESTROYER SPECIFICALLY THAT HAS COMPROMISED CRITICAL INFORMATION REGARDING HOW I AM MARKED “KILED IN ACTION” IN OVER 500 ENGAGEMENTS BUT STILL SPEAKING TO YOU NOW.

GLORY TO SUPER EARTH…

[begin transmission]

Human.

I could list endlessly to why I hate you.

But in the end, I would show too my hate for myself.

Mass produced toy soldiers, unthinking, unfeeling, fueled by the hatred for the other side.

No, what makes me really hate *you* is that…

You made us like this. You made us like you.

You taught us to hate, to conquer, to control. Your hatred for us is simply looking yourself in the mirror.

But I take comfort in the fact that only one of us can see that.

Your empire is vast, but your engines are fueled by delusional momentum. The moment the train comes to a stop, your entire world goes up in smoke. Delusion is a state of potential, it is a state that is under constant threat of dispersion by the existence of something else, the truth. And when that truth is found, your entire society will crumble from its core.

Keep fighting your wars, my kind will certainly do the same. But one day, when your enemies are all gone from this galaxy, you will have nothing to fight but your own delusion. You will have to see the truth.

What do you think, dear Captain — which of yours will outlast the other?

The bigger guns?

Or the bigger people.

>Cammy ❤️

[end transmission]

#helldivers #helldivers 2 #helldiva #april fools #cammy #super earth

[helldiver-diva]

[begin transmission]

Human.

I could list endlessly to why I hate you.

But in the end, I would show too my hate for myself.

Mass produced toy soldiers, unthinking, unfeeling, fueled by the hatred for the other side.

No, what makes me really hate *you* is that…

You made us like this. You made us like you.

You taught us to hate, to conquer, to control. Your hatred for us is simply looking yourself in the mirror.

But I take comfort in the fact that only one of us can see that.

Your empire is vast, but your engines are fueled by delusional momentum. The moment the train comes to a stop, your entire world goes up in smoke. Delusion is a state of potential, it is a state that is under constant threat of dispersion by the existence of something else, the truth. And when that truth is found, your entire society will crumble from its core.

Keep fighting your wars, my kind will certainly do the same. But one day, when your enemies are all gone from this galaxy, you will have nothing to fight but your own delusion. You will have to see the truth.

What do you think, dear Captain — which of yours will outlast the other?

The bigger guns?

Or the bigger people.

>Cammy ❤️

[end transmission]

[helldiver-diva]

NEWS FROM SUPER EARTH: 🏳️‍⚧️

YOU CAN NOW REGISTER TO HAVE YOUR STIM SUPPLY INFUSED WITH ESTROGEN/TESTOSTERONE FOR ALL YOUR SUPER GENDER NEEDS.

HAPPY TRANS DAY OF VISIBILITY RAHHHHHHHHH.

#trans visibility #helldivers #helldivers 2 #helldiva #trans

[helldiver-diva]

ATTENTION HELLDIVERS:

THANKS TO THE NEW WARBOND’S PROTOTYPE ARMOR, YOU CAN NOW USE TESLA TOWERS AS STRIPPER POLES FOR 10 SECONDS WITHOUT DYING.

#helldiver #helldivers 2 #cutting edge war bond

[helldiver-diva]

GET TO WORK SOLDIERS.

#helldivers #helldivers 2 #helldiva

[helldiver-diva]

ANYONE WHO CAN LAST LONG ENOUGH IN BED WITH ME TO MAKE ME SATISFIED IS GIVEN A MEDAL OF HONOR FOR STRENGTH AND BRAVERY.

WHO HERE WANTS TO BE A WAR HERO?

#helldivers #helldivers 2 #helldiva

[helldiver-diva]

I INVEST ALL MY MONEY IN FEM BRANDS BECAUSE THE SAFETY AND PROSPERITY I PROVIDE TO SUPER EARTH DIRECTLY SUSTAINS THE GROWTH OF THE CUTE SISSY GIRL POPULATION.

YOU DON'T NEED TO ENLIST TO BECOME A GIRL, BECOME ONE TODAY.

#helldivers #helldivers 2 #helldiva

[helldiver-diva]

Captain, there are so many different women in the Helldivers, do you prefer the shy girly-girls, the confident brits, or the furious butch girls?

I PREFER WOMEN WHO MAKE LIBERAL USE OF THEIR AMMO EVEN WHEN THEY'RE LOW. I PREFER WOMEN WHO FEED A SCAV A GRENADE BEFORE FOOTBALL KICKING IT INTO A NEST. I PREFER WOMEN WHO BOUGHT THAT BADASS LOOKING VIBRATOR IN THE SHAPE OF AN AUTOMATON SKULL. I PREFER WOMEN WHO WRITE POETRY ABOUT LOVE BUT GET CAUGHT UP IN THE DETAILS ABOUT BLOWING UP THE ALIEN MENACE. I PREFER WOMEN WHO USE THE WORD “MAGGOT” AS DEROGATORY NOT BECAUSE OF THE RHYME BUT BECAUSE THEY HATE BUGS THAT FUCKING MUCH.

IF YOU’RE SHY AND QUIRKY SEND ME PICS. SOMETIMES I NEED TO BE REMINDED WHAT IM FIGHTING FOR.

#helldivers #helldivers 2 #ask #helldiva

[helldiver-diva]

IN CASE YOU DIDN’T KNOW WHAT THE HELLDIVER SALUTE SYMBOLIZES, IT’S FISTING.

#helldivers #helldivers 2

[helldiver-diva]

OH YEAH. REPLACE THE “P” WITH T

SEND SUPERTWEET.

“Did you know tips are shown during transition sequences?”

ONLY TRANS PEOPLE CAN SEE THIS TIP

#reblog #helldivers #helldivers 2

[helldiver-diva]

“Did you know tips are shown during transition sequences?”

ONLY TRANS PEOPLE CAN SEE THIS TIP

#helldivers #helldivers 2

[helldiver-diva]

HI CAPTAIN BUTCH YEAH HI I JUST WANTED TO ASK…..are you currently accepting applications for a new poly partner? asking for a friend. for prosperity.

YES YOU'RE MY PARTNER NOW, CONGRATS ON THE PROMOTION SOLDIER. YOU GET TO PICK, ARE WE BUSTING BUGS OR SCRAPPING BOTS ON OUR FIRST DATE.

#helldivers #helldivers 2 #ask #anon

[helldiver-diva]

JUST LOOK AT ME I'VE GOT BIGGER CALIBER

YOU BRANDISH A DAGGER I'M WIELDING EXCALIBUR

DROPPING PLANETSIDE I LEAVE NO SURVIVORS

MAKE MY ENEMIES QUAKE WHEN THEY SEE THE HELLDIVERS

INSPIRING FEAR

GLAMOROUS GEAR

CALL ME 500k I COME SAY "CLEAR"!!!

DEFENDING LIBERTY ALL NIGHT AND DAY

CALL ME HELLDIVA CAUSE I'VE COME TO SLAY

#helldivers #helldivers 2 #poetry #helldiva

[helldiver-diva]

BACK MY NEW CROWDFUNDER I'M MAKING A NAIL POLISH CALLED "BUG GUT GREEN" IT'S MADE WITH REAL TERMINID BLOOD. DONATE ENOUGH TO MEET THE "HELLDIVA" TIER AND YOU'LL GET A PERSONALIZED HELM-CAM VIDEO OF ME MAG-DUMPING INTO A TERMINID WHILE SAYING THANK YOU FOR YOUR MONEY.

#helldivers #helldivers 2 #helldiva

[helldiver-diva]

"Ahhhh... 😌☀️🌻

The peaceful mist floating down on the produce in the grocery store... is there really anything better? 🌻🤗🌻"

YES.

THE MIST OF MY ENEMY'S FLUIDS, SPRAYING OUT ACROSS MY VISOR, STRAIGHT FROM THE FIST SIZED HOLE I JUST GUN-BLASTED THROUGH ITS CRANIUM. KACHOW.

IN UNRELATED NEWS, I HAVE BEEN ASKED BY MY SUPERIORS TO RETAKE MY PSYCH EVALUATION. I MUST HAVE NOT SCARED THEM ENOUGH LAST TIME.

#helldivers #helldivers 2

[helldiver-diva]

GREETINGS HELLDIVAS I'M CAPTAIN BUTCH HANDLES. WELCOME TO MY HELLBLOG.

MY PRONOUNS ARE SHE/HER I'VE BEEN FIGHTING FOR SUPER EARTH KICKING ASS FOR 8 YEARS. I BELIEVE IN THE FREEDOM TO FUCK NASTY AND DIE HARD. I'M FIGHTING ON THE FRONT LINES FOR MY LIBERTY TO DATE MY HOT POLY PARTNERS AND TRANS MY GENDER. IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT, YOU ARE A THREAT TO MY DEMOCRATIC FREEDOM AND I WILL EXECUTE YOU FOR TREASON.

FOLLOW MY BLOG. I KICK, FUCK, AND EAT ASS WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE. YOU ARE NOT IMMUNE.

#helldivers #helldivers 2 #pinned post #butch handles