hrhthebirthdayprincess

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

Just had my first school accommodations meeting and I'll be getting access to note taking software, TTS software and possibly audio textbooks, extra testing time, and a designated ergonomic chair assigned to me in every classroom. Fucking LIVING right now

#education #accessibility

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

btw if you're annoyed with Google search giving you results for stuff that's similar to but not actually what you typed in, go to search tools, go to where it says "all results" and change that to "verbatim" and then it will search for what you actually asked for

why this is not the default is beyond me other than obvs enshittification but it has rescued a bunch of searches for me lately where the top results were completely unhelpful until i switched to that so. might be helpful for others

#how things work #or not

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

Do you ever have a problem where you just don’t know how to reply to an argument, not because you don’t know the answer, but you just don’t know where to begin? Like, the foundation of knowledge you’d need to impart to this person before you could even begin to drag them out of their sinkhole of ignorance would cost thousands of dollars if it were coming from a university?

#I will never forget the Quora question asking why astronauts don't walk on the sun while it is turned off at night

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

Old lady Florence Zimmermann from John Bellairs' The House with a Clock in Its Walls because she loves purple and everything in her house is that color.

#She is also a powerful witch who lives next to her charmingly eccentric best friend #but the ability to live as purple as you want when you are a grown up was the big draw #and now I have learned from the link she was inspired by a real person with purple everything which makes me so happy #and now I also have to watch the movie version with Jack Black and Cate Blanchette #but they don't capture the cozy look of the Edward Gorey drawings of the original publication sadly

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

reblog if you are your url

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

The Mask Trope, and Disfiguremisia in Media

[large text: The Mask Trope, and Disfiguremisia in Media]

If you followed this blog for more than like a week, you're probably familiar with “the mask trope” or at least with me complaining about it over and over in perpetuity. But why is it bad and why can't this dude shut up about it?

Let's start with who this trope applies to: characters with facial differences. There is some overlap with blind characters as well; think of the blindfold that is forced on a blind character for no reason. Here is a great explanation of it in this context by blindbeta. It's an excellent post in general, even if your character isn't blind or low vision you should read at least the last few paragraphs.

Here's a good ol’ tired link to what a facial difference is, but to put it simply:

If you have a character, who is a burn survivor or has scars, who wears a mask, this is exactly this trope.

The concept applies to other facial differences as well, but scars and burns are 99% of the representation and “representation” we get, so I'll be using these somewhat interchangeably here.

The mask can be exactly what you think, but it refers to any facial covering that doesn't have a medical purpose. So for example, a CPAP mask doesn't count for this trope, but a Magic Porcelain Mask absolutely does. Bandages do as well. If it covers the part of the face that is “different”, it can be a mask in the context used here.

Eye patches are on thin ice because while they do serve a medical purpose in real life, in 99.9% of media they are used for the same purpose as a mask. It's purely aesthetic.

With that out of the way, let's get into why this trope sucks and find its roots. Because every trope is just a symptom of something, really.

Roughly in order of the least to most important reasons...

Why It Sucks 

[large text: Why It Sucks]

It's overdone. As in — boring. You made your character visibly different, and now they're no longer that. What is the point? Just don't give them the damn scar if you're going to hide it. 

Zero connection with reality. No one does this. I don't even know how to elaborate on this. This doesn't represent anyone because no one does this.

Disability erasure. For the majority of characters with facial differences, their scars or burns somehow don't disable them physically, so the only thing left is the visible part… aaand the mask takes care of it too. Again, what's the point? If you want to make your disabled character abled, then just have them be abled. What is the point of "curing" them other than to make it completely pointless?

Making your readers with facial differences feel straight up bad. I'm gonna be honest! This hurts to see when it's all you get, over and over. Imagine there's this thing that everyone bullied you about, everyone still stares at, that is with you 24/7. Imagine you wanted to see something where people like you aren't treated like a freakshow. Somewhat unrealistic, but imagine that. That kind of world would only exist in fiction, right? So let's look into fiction- oh, none of the positive (or at least not "child-murderer evil") characters look like me. I mean they do, but they don't. They're forced to hide the one thing that connects us. I don't want to hide myself. I don't want to be told over and over that this is what people like me should do. That this is what other people expect so much that it's basically the default way a person with a facial difference can exist. I don't want this.

Perpetuating disfiguremisia. 

"Quick" Disfiguremisia Talk

[large text: "Quick" Disfiguremisia Talk]

It's quick when compared to my average facial difference discussion post, bear with me please.

Disfiguremisia; portmanteau of disfigure from “disfigurement” and -misia, Greek for hatred. 

Also known as discrimination of those mythical horrifically deformed people.

It shows up in fiction all the time; in-universe and in-narrative. Mask trope is one of the most common* representations of it, and it's also a trope that is gaining traction more and more, both in visual art and writing. This is a trope I particularly hate, because it's a blatant symptom of disfiguremisia. It's not hidden and it doesn't try to be. It's a painful remainder that I do not want nor need.

*most common is easily “evil disfigured villain”, just look at any horror media. But that's for another post, if ever.

When you put your character in a mask, it sends a clear message: in your story, facial differences aren't welcome. The world is hostile. Other characters are hostile. The author is, quite possibly, hostile. Maybe consciously, but almost always not, they just don't think that disfiguremisia means anything because it's the default setting. No one wants to see you because your face makes you gross and unsightly. If you have a burn; good luck, but we think you're too ugly to have a face. Have a scar? Too bad, now you don't. Get hidden.

Everything here is a decision that was made by the author. You are the one who makes the world. You are the person who decides if being disabled is acceptable or not there. The story doesn't have a mind of its own, you chose to make it disfiguremisic. 

It doesn't have to be.

Questions to Ask Yourself

[large text: Questions to Ask Yourself]

Since I started talking about facial differences on this blog, I have noticed a very specific trend in how facial differences are treated when compared to other disabilities. A lot of writers and artists are interested in worldbuilding where accessibility is considered, where disabled people are accepted, where neurodivergence is seen as an important part of the human experience, not something “other”. This is amazing, genuinely.

Yet, absolutely no one seems to be interested in a world that is anything but cruel to facial differences. There's no escapist fantasies for us.

You see this over and over, at some point it feels like the same story with different names attached.

The only way a character with a facial difference can exist is to hide it. Otherwise, they are shamed by society. Seen as something gross. I noticed that it really doesn't matter who the character is, facial difference is this great equalizer. Both ancient deities and talking forest cats get treated as the same brand of disgusting thing as long as they're scarred, as long as they had something explode in their face, as long as they've been cursed. They can be accomplished, they can be a badass, they can be the leader of the world, they can kill a dragon, but they cannot, under any circumstances, be allowed to peacefully exist with a facial difference. They have to hide it in the literal sense, or be made to feel that they should. Constantly ashamed, embarrassed that they dare to have a face.

Question one to ask yourself: why is disfiguremisia a part of your story?

I'm part of a few minority groups. I'm an immigrant, I'm disabled, I'm queer. I get enough shit in real life for this so I like to take a break once in a while. I love stories where transphobia isn't a thing. Where xenophobia doesn't come up. But my whole life, I can't seem to find stories that don't spew out disfiguremisia in one way or the other at the first possible opportunity.

Why is disfiguremisia a default part of your worldbuilding? Why can't it be left out? Why in societies with scarred saviors and warriors is there such intense disgust for them? Why can't anyone even just question why this is the state of the world?

Why is disfiguremisia normal in your story?

Question two: do you know enough about disfiguremisia to write about it?

Ask yourself, really. Do you? Writers sometimes ask if or how to portray ableism when they themselves aren't disabled, but no one bothers to wonder if maybe they aren't knowledgeable enough to make half their story about their POV character experiencing disfiguremisia. How much do you know, and from where? Have you read Mikaela Moody or any other advocates’ work around disfiguremisia? Do you understand the way it intersects; with being a trans woman, with being Black? What is your education on this topic?

And for USAmericans... do you know what "Ugly Laws" are, and when they ended?

Question three: what does your story associate with facial difference — and why?

If I had to guess; “shame”, “embarrassment”, “violence”, "disgust", “intimidation”, “trauma”, “guilt”, “evil”, “curse”, “discomfort”, “fear”, or similar would show up. 

Why doesn't it associate it with positive concepts? Why not “hope” or “love” or “pride” or “community”? Why not “soft” or “delicate”? Dare I say, “beauty” or “innocence”? Why not “blessing”? “Acceptance”?

Why not “normal”?

Question four: why did you make the character the way they are? 

Have you considered that there are other things than “horrifically burned for some moral failing” or “most traumatic scenario put to paper”? Why is it always “a tough character with a history of violence” and never “a Disfigured princess”? Why not “a loving parent” or “a fashionable girl”, instead of “the most unkind person you ever met” and “total badass who doesn’t care about anything - other than how scary their facial difference is to these poor ableds”? Don’t endlessly associate us with brutality and suffering. We aren’t violent or manipulative or physically strong or brash or bloodthirsty by default. We can be soft, and frail and gentle and kind - and we can still be proud and unashamed.

Question five: why is your character just… fine with all this?

Can’t they make a community with other people with facial differences and do something about this? Demand the right to exist as disabled and not have to hide their literal face? Why are they cool with being dehumanized and treated with such hatred? Especially if they fall into the "not so soft and kind" category that I just talked about, it seems obvious to me that they would be incredibly and loudly pissed off about being discriminated against over and over... Why can't your character, who is a subject of disfiguremisia, realize that maybe it's disfiguremisia that's the problem, and try to fix it?

Question six: why is your character wearing a mask? 

Usually, there's no reason. Most of the time the author hasn't considered that there even should be one, the character just wears a mask because that's what people with facial differences do in their mind. Most writers aren't interested in this kind of research or even considering it as a thing they should do. The community is unimportant to them, it's not like we are real people who read books. They think they understand, because to them it's not complex, it's not nuanced. It's ugly = bad. Why would you need a reason?

For cases where the reason is stated, I promise, I have heard of every single one. To quote, "to spare others from looking at them". I have read, "content warning: he has burn scars under the mask, he absolutely hates taking it off!", emphasis not mine. Because "he hates the way his skin looks", because "they care for their appearance a lot" (facial differences make you ugly, remember?). My favorite: "only has scars and the mask when he's a villain, not as a hero", just to subtly drive the point home. This isn't the extreme end of the spectrum. Now, imagine being a reader with a facial difference. This is your representation, sitting next to Freddy Krueger and Voldemort.

How do you feel?

F.A.Q. [frequently asked questions]

[large text: F.A.Q. [frequently asked questions]]

As in, answers and “answers” to common arguments or concerns. 

“Actually they want to hide their facial difference” - your character doesn’t have free will. You want them to hide it. Again; why.

“They are hiding it to be more inconspicuous!” - I get that there are elves in their world, but there’s no universe where wearing a mask with eye cutouts on the street is less noticeable than having a scar. Facial differences aren’t open wounds sprinkling with blood, in case that's not clear.

“It’s for other people's comfort” - why are other characters disfiguremisic to this extent? Are they forcing all minorities to stay hidden and out of sight too? That’s a horrible society to exist in.

“They are wearing it for Actual Practical Reason” - cool! I hope that this means you have other characters with facial differences that don’t wear it for any reason.

"It's the character's artistic expression" - I sure hope that there are abled characters with the same kind of expression then.

“They’re ashamed of their face” - and they never have any character development that would make that go away? That's just bad writing. Why are they ashamed in the first place? Why is shame the default stance to have about your own face in your story? I get that you think we should be ashamed and do these ridiculous things, but in real life we just live with it. 

"Now that you say that it is kinda messed up but I'm too far into the story please help" - here you go.

“[some variation of My Character is evil so it's fine/a killer so it fits/just too disgusting to show their disability” - this is the one of the only cases where I’m fine with disability erasure, actually. Please don’t make them have a facial difference. This is the type of harm that real life activists spend years and decades undoing. Disfiguremisia from horror movies released in the 70s is still relevant. It still affects people today.

"But [in-universe explanation why disfiguremisia is cool and fine actually]" - this changes nothing.

Closing Remarks

[large text: Closing Remarks]

I hope that this post explains my thoughts on facial difference representation better. It's a complicated topic, I get it. I'm also aware that this post might come off as harsh (?) but disfiguremisia shouldn't be treated lightly, it shouldn't be a prop. It's real world discrimination with a big chunk of its origins coming out of popular media.

With the asks that have been sent regarding facial differences, I realized that I probably haven't explained what the actual problems are well enough. It's not about some technical definition, or about weird in-universe explanations. It's about categorizing us as some apparently fundamentally different entity that can't possibly be kind and happy, about disfiguremisia so ingrained into our culture that it's apparently impossible to make a world without it; discrimination so deep that it can't be excised, only worked around. But you can get rid of it. You can just not have it there in the first place. Disfiguremisia isn't a fundamental part of how the world works; getting rid of it won't cause it to collapse. Don't portray discrimination as an integral, unquestionable part of the world that has to stay no matter what; whether it's ableism, transphobia, or Islamophobia or anything else. A world without discrimination can exist. If you can't imagine a world without disfiguremisia in fiction... that's bad. Sad, mostly. To me, at least.

Remember, that your readers aren't going to look at Character with a Scar #14673 and think "now I'm going to research how real life people with facial differences live." They won't, there's no inclination for them to do so. If you don't give them a reason, they won't magically start thinking critically about facial differences and disfiguremisia. People like their biases and they like to think that they understand.

And, even if you're explaining it over and over ;-) (winky face) there will still be people who are going to be actively resistant to giving a shit. To try and get the ones who are capable of caring about us, you, as the author, need to first understand disfiguremisia, study Face Equality, think of me as a human being with human emotions who doesn't want to see people like me treated like garbage in every piece of media I look at. There's a place and time for that media, and if you don't actually understand disfiguremisia, you will only perpetuate it; not "subvert" it, not "comment" on it.

I hope this helps :-) (smile emoji. for good measure)

Mod Sasza

#long #disfiguremisia #writing advice

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

So, my spouse has been exploring his gender lately; he also just built himself a new laptop. Today he told me that he in an attempt to process some genderfeels through metaphor, he made a post on a trans forum along the lines of: "I'm a lifelong Windows user and I think I'm pretty good at it. I want to find out what Linux has to offer but I'm afraid I wouldn't be any good at it. And how do you choose the right Linux distro, anyway? Do you have to try them all?"

The responses, he said, were a mix of useful advice about feeling out your gender and useful advice about choosing a Linux distro.

I love trans people so much

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

marine biology is so scary because it’s such a small field. i was giving a talk on cetaceans and afterward a woman approached me with her husband and she said, “you did very well. [husband’s name] actually pioneered the research and published the first paper on that. We were very impressed by you.”

Which is such a scientific interpretation/public education win I will cherish forever but also for the rest of my life any time I give a talk I will be haunted by the knowledge that the world’s leading expert who literally discovered/invented the topic might be in the room,

which is like, the opposite of what you’re supposed to do for stage fright. In fact I never used to experience stage fright but now I will.

#stories

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

If I ask nicely will people reblog this and tell me what their most common breakfast is? Not your favorite necessarily, just what you have for breakfast most frequently? 🙏🏽

#steel cut oats in almondmilk with cinnamon and blueberries and pecans or apple and walnuts is my every day breakfast with coffee #it is my T2 diabetes friendly breakfast I can put in the fridge the night before and don't have to think about in the morning #and yummy too

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

For folks who are going through medical treatments involving infusions, injections, etc, it's usually annoying to work around clothes to make space for infusion ports and IV lines etc. Also, clinics and hospitals can be cold (literally) and between the treatments and the environment, it can get pretty uncomfortable on the body.

Bibipins, a small Black-owned business I've been following, is currently having pre-orders for these super cute and comfortable hoodies that have multiple zippers throughout locations where ports or IVs would be installed. I think it's brilliant and honestly wish these existed before.

If you know someone who might need this, please check it out. I'm thinking of getting the strawberry one myself. I've already ordered from this business before and really like her work and products. And we'd be supporting a small business too!

An important note: She's in Canada so there will be shipping costs. Please don't send this link to folks who are the type to complain about shipping or small businesses not giving discounts like Amazon, etc. Bibi has gotten so much harassment from jerk "customers" (in quotes because they don't actually buy anything) who demand Amazon-like shipping times, costs, and product discounts. Thank you!

Her website is here: https://bibipins.com/. She also has a lot of other cool and cute products, I hope you'll check her out!

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

There is a reality show called Alone, and the premise is dumping 10 survivalists out in the woods all by themselves with a pelican case full of cameras and see who lasts the longest. They all have a backpack full of survival gear, no guns, and they're all separated by at least 10 miles so they really are alone. They get a med checkup every couple weeks and presumably more often if they've been identified as a risk, so no one starves to death and they all have a sat phone to tap out with.

It's the only reality show I watch, because regardless of how much drama the producers try to edit in after the fact, everyone is filming themselves and they're all alone. There is no interpersonal drama and they are obligated to focus on the actual survival aspect because there is literally nothing else.

Which means I get to have hypernuanced opinions that actually mean something. I imagine its comparable to a chef watching a cooking show, because some of the survivalists know their shit and some of them very much do not and you can tell from day 3. The show does a good job of vetting, so they aren't just tossing just anybody out there, but an impressive resume means jack shit once there's no one to impress.

They always start out in early fall/late summer, which is by far the easiest time to do so, but that means as I'm watching this new season in early spring and I'm watching people go hungry in a field full of edible plants, I want to go foraging So Bad. And I Can't. And I Am Suffering.

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

hey just fyi if you live in the northern hemisphere and it's sunny out you need sunblock, especially if you are pale

#thank you because this reminder is always needed

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

The NPR interview audio and transcript are now available here Nurse Kellye Of 'M*A*S*H' Still gets Fan Mail For Breakthrough Role : NPR but do click the earlier link to see pictures that did not remain with the article.

Hey, Look Me Over || M*A*S*H 11x01 Original Airdate: October 25, 1982 written by Karen Hall & Alan Alda directed by Susan Oliver

#m*a*s*h #kellye nakahara #I remember when your essay was written and how the actress knew of your heartfelt praise #but I never knew about the radio interview so this was wonderful to listen to #undescribed gifs

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

"So much of the current anti-trans rhetoric hides behind language of “concern.” If you’re a parent or other supportive adult who is earnestly concerned about a young person, that language can make you feel like seeking support that may or does include gender-affirming care for a trans youth isn’t a wise or caring decision. This is the exact reason that language is being used.

Think back to anti-abortion rhetoric, for example, to the bills that force waiting periods (waiting periods we know only make things more difficult for those seeking abortion) deceptively stating they are out⁠ of “concern” that the people seeking abortions are rushing their decision. It’s the same thing with trans care; “concern” is used to introduce a (often poorly disguised) barrier to care, in hopes of eventually making that care inaccessible.

I’m going to go over some of the clues that a resource or person’s only concern is directing people away from trans-affirming care and towards harmful, anti-trans spaces or approaches.

I’ll get to the list in a second, but my biggest piece of advice is: If a resource, person, or service presents being trans as the result of trauma⁠, social contagion, peer pressure or of literally anything other than one of the many ways humans experience gender, do not pass go."

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

*Sees someone on twitter arguing that DoorDash is necessary for the disabled because microwave food is too much to handle.*

...What. That seems absurdly specific.

There are a lot of reasons someone might not be able to microwave food. "I literally cannot get out of bed", "i need nutrients you can't just microwave", "my dumb brain has put up 18 billion barriers to try and stop me from eating and this is the loophole I have" "the microwave in this apartment is out of reach/not labeled properly/not ADA friendly in another way" "for x or y reason microwave food is a one way ticket to severe burns", etc. I found a lot of reasons someone might need DoorDash and I also found this cool article about food sharing in the disabled community and how the author had to rely on an abusive partner once because she was either in bed or barely able to crawl and they were among the few people bringing food.

Just saying, there's a reason disabled people have higher chances of food insecurity and there's a reason meal trains, meals on wheels, and other programs focus on bringing food to people in need and not just assuming "they have a microwave and money, why bother?". Sometimes you don't have a family or friends or mutual aid group to bring you meals when you can't even pop something in the microwave.

#ableism #I am moving to a new house that has a built in wall microwave and I am considering bringing our current counter version #I want to pull things out onto a counter for support rather than carry to the island behind me or past the fridge to the other counter #and I am pretty mobile in ways my father in law with Parkinson's was not #it is not difficult at all to imagine people with different needs #food #and as I clear out my freezer I notice microwave meals aren't that great #who wants to live off that if they can have something restaurant quality

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

A newly developed silicon material covered with tiny nanospikes is capable of taking out 96 percent of the virus particles unfortunate enough to touch its surface in tests. It could find a use in hospitals, science labs, and anywhere surfaces need to be as sterile as possible. The nanospikes literally skewer virus particles as they make contact, according to the team behind the study, led by researchers from the Royal Melbourne Institute of Technology (RMIT) University in Australia. This action breaks the viruses apart or damages them enough to stop them from reproducing. It's somewhat like puncturing a balloon, with almost all viral activity on the surface wiped out in six hours.

Continue Reading.

[hrhthebirthdayprincess]

What's a library without books?! The Imagination Library is putting free books into children’s homes and fostering a love of reading for children ages 0-5.

Current CA enrollees – 65,091.

There are currently 25 county-wide programs in CA.

For more information, visit the Imagination Library’s Find My Program page https://imaginationlibrary.com/usa/find-my-program/

If the Imagination Library isn’t available where you live yet, help us find a local partner to get started in your community. https://imaginationlibrary.com/usa/start-a-program/

#imaginationlibrary #dollyparton

#california #libraries #resources