joshusten

[joshusten]

it's been a while since I drew anything Guy related. I miss him ( the version of him in the valenweek video that one time). Fooliverse Guy thinks of Honey whenever he writes romance. He genuinely enjoys writing warm and domestic relationships. I would argue that Fooliverse Guy is a more mentally stable and dependable person.

#slushie! guy......its my husband.... #I MISS HIM SO MUCH I PHYSICALLY HAD A REACTION WHEN I SAW THIS #and goddammit!!!! hes still cute in every universe!!!!!! #romance writer guy is so!!!!!!! #AUGH THIS IS SO CHEFS KISS AURVSHEJEJEJEJ THANK U SLUSHIE #redacted audio #redacted asmr #redacted guy #redactedverse #redacted fanart #slushiearts #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

Redacted Boys pt 1

#THESE DESIGNS R GORGEOUS #AND I ABSOLUTELY LOVE UR STYLE HOLYSHIT #ohmygod ur guy........ #kicking my feet #blushing giggling sobbing #I LOVE HIM UR HONOR........... #eating this artstyle frfr #ohmygod this is embarrassing i keep looking at ur guy HES JUST SO PRETTY #redacted audio #redacted asmr #redactedverse #porter solaire #david shaw #lasko moore #redacted solaire clan #sam collins #redacted guy #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

CW HORROR, BLOOD

monstrous feminine, alexis solaire if you saw this before no you did not (i fixed it)

#OMFG...... #THIS IS SO COOL #THE CRAZED LOOK #OH MY GOOOOOD #beautiful art like lmao this feels like sumn i would see in a gothic mansion (/pos!!!!!) #redacted verse #redacted audio #redacted asmr #alexis getty #alexis solaire #redacted alexis #redactedverse #redacted fanart #slushiearts #cw blood #cw horror #tw blood #tw horror #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

could you perhaps maybe possibly show us morgan kyne 🥺

Can you tell he’s Matt Murdock inspired?

#holy shit #i need him........... #i mean what #MATT MURDOCK INSPIRED I LOVE THAT #ajwjejeoeoekeke giggling and kicking my feet hes so handsome...... #redacted audio #redacted asmr #redacted verse #redactedaudio #redactedasmr #redactedverse #redacted morgan #redacted seer obscura #pycthanswers #pycthsketches #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

oh my god.

The Pursuit of Catharsis

Pairing : Guy/Honey

Tags : Infidelity, Angst, Hurt no Comfort, Post-Divorce, Guy cheated on Honey and they both had a divorce, DILF Guy, Screenwriter Guy, Moving On Themes

Word Count : 1,453

ao3

How to Heal after a Cheating Spouse 

Betrayal from a loved one would cause a mix of emotions unlike any other: vitriol, grief, disappointment. In this column, relationship counselor C. Pardalis details the steps needed to move on. 

The first ever step that nobody ever wants to hear is forgiveness. Forgiveness isn’t done for your spouse’s sake- neither does it mean that you have to maintain a relationship with them. It’s about making peace with the pain of the past and moving forward. 

Honey closed all the tabs in their browser and shut down the laptop. Every website said the same thing- to forgive, forget, and be the bigger person. Pain simmered in the hollow of their chest. They stared around themselves and noted the take-out boxes on the table. Abandoned laundry piled high on top of the dining room chair- how’d it even get there?

The room could use some cleaning. They were expecting a guest, after all. 

In thirty minutes, Guy will arrive at the front door- as if he’s a visitor and not someone who’d lived in the complex for the past twenty years. Had they been younger- had they cared more, they probably would’ve been angrier. Tossed all of his things when they found out- when they saw the mark on the side of his neck, the pair of tickets for a vacation they didn’t book, the foreign smell of cologne sticking in the inside of his jacket. But they didn’t- and instead held onto his things for him to pick up after the divorce had been finalized. Time flew in the blink of an eye and papers were signed.

They’re older. Possibly wiser- but they think they’re just tired of it all. Or maybe they were looking for an excuse to get out of the relationship, anyway. It didn’t matter anymore. Honey quickly folded and put away the laundry in a mechanical way, their hands moved faster than their mind could catch up. 

Honey looked at the inside of their closet- a row of newer, sleek designer clothing came into view. They bit the inside of their cheek as they decided on what to wear. They came a long way ever since they began dating him- no longer the college student living in cramped, shared dorms, but someone with a sizable enough salary to afford some luxuries. 

Of course, that was nothing compared to Guy the best-selling author, award-winning screenwriter. Everything had its costs, they supposed. They hated to admit it- but they should’ve seen it coming. The success- the downfall. The way it crashed and burned for them.

Try dating yourself, the article said. Make an effort to treat yourself well and find confidence like how you would a partner. 

They picked a matching set- a navy-blue, cashmere suit and jacket. Honey looked at themself in the mirror and saw signs of aging. They also saw the bags under their eyes from sleepless nights. Nothing some concealer couldn’t fix. They straightened their jacket and fastened a watch to their wrist. 

There’s nothing to prove, Honey reminded themself. But they knew that it was a lie. They spritzed perfume on the inside of their neck. They were dressed as if they were going somewhere-when ten minutes ago, they were lounging in their sleepwear, unable to get themselves out of bed. They wanted to look like they were doing well. Unaffected. Like the twenty years that went down the drain meant nothing to them. 

If Guy wanted to sleep around- then so be it. They’re a prize that he’d regret not treasuring. 

Honey straightened their posture and twisted their defeated expression into something more neutral. It didn’t last long, as they sighed and went back to their sagged shoulders and hurt, pathetic gaze. They’d play the part when he’s here. It’s exhausting to keep up the facade when they felt nothing but confident, around them remnants of what used to be. 

Their wedding ring sat in the same drawer they kept their watches. They should pawn it off soon. 

Focus on personal development. Improve yourself and stick to a routine. It’s easy to fall into a rut when grieving the ending of a relationship, especially due to your partner’s mistake. 

Honey was the healthiest they’d ever been- yet it’s the worst they’ve ever felt. They go on runs in the crack of dawn and hike on the weekends. They’ve tried everything an acai-bowl eating, veganism-practicing LA native would do: pilates, yoga, hot yoga, crossfit. The post-exercise endorphins would soothe them momentarily, but soon the grief of it all would crash into them like a wave against the cliffs and they stood, heaving on the floor like an animal.

It’s ironic how they were the happiest when they would barely sleep and eat anything that they could afford at the time- which wasn’t much. When Guy would excitedly bring pizza for dinner when they knew that he’d pay for them out of his own paycheck. He’d say that he made it especially for them, and the worst part was that it was true. He put onions because he knew they liked them when he didn’t- put up with the horrors of pineapple on pizza when he found it disgusting. 

Honey swallowed and fought the incoming tears. Fuck. 

A series of knocks echoed through the apartment and they straightened themself. A picture of serenity and composure. The door swung to reveal the person they’ve been dreading. 

“Hey,” he greeted, somewhat hesitant. He had the nerve to look sorry. Anger boiled in their stomach and took purchase in their diaphragm as Honey dissected the man in front of them. 

At forty-five, he was definitely still attractive, the half-up, salt-and-pepper hair and unshaved stubble giving him an air of aged wisdom. But Honey just thought that he looked weary, the well-tailored, expensive suit doing a good job of hiding his defeated sort of pride. They have that in common.

It’s been a difficult year. 

“Your things are in the boxes near the couch. I packed them so you can just take them away,” they said, curt and flat. 

“Okay,” he replied, tight-lipped. They could feel the sadness emanating from him- it reminded them of the night of the confrontation- when he broke down and said that they should leave, because they deserved better. And they do, they like to believe that they do. But why is it so hard?

“Your books and CDs- the Star Trek merch is over there, too.” 

“Thanks,” Guy muttered. And the two of them stood in a suffocating silence. 

“I don’t resent you, by the way,” Honey said, the words practiced, their back turned from him against the backdrop of the city lights from the floor-to-ceiling windows. 

“Really.” It was rhetorical, not a question but more of an ironic statement. 

Guy gave a weak laugh, like it’s a private joke only he understood. After signing one movie deal after the next, He’s somehow rougher on the edges now, as if any form of gentleness that remained in him was no longer. “I don’t deserve you,” he said, grief-stricken and still as earnest as ever, and Honey could feel the twist of a knife in their stomach. 

The article repeated itself in their mind. The first ever step that nobody ever wants to hear is forgiveness. 

Fuck that, Honey thought as they tried to hold themself together. Fuck that article. Fuck Guy. Fuck him and his ambitions and the pains of his past for taking the one thing they ever cared about. 

What if they don’t want to forgive? What if the pain was so unbearable- it wasn’t like this was a mistake that could be fixed with a good, healthy lifestyle and breathing exercises. Twenty years. Twenty years of seeing him, soft and gentle, yet unrelenting in the pursuit of his dreams of becoming a writer. His hair brushed against their neck whenever he’d lean his head on their shoulder back in the movie nights they had in college. Him taking care of them whenever they’re sick and pissy about it. The late-night drives and the way he’d always have time for them no matter how busy he was.

The light that drained from his eyes, the exhaustion. The way he’d go home in the dead of night, drained and tired and burnt out. The stink of cigarettes and the alcohol under his breath. The articles, the tabloids, the rumors and how they insisted that he wouldn’t do it. He loved them too much to ever leave them for someone else. 

Honey collapsed into the floor as soon as Guy closed the door behind him. Heavy sobs wrecked through them as the night wrapped them in its embrace. 

#OH MY GOOOOOOOOD #bro ;---; #AUGH THIS IS SOOOOO PAINFUL its delicious #bro IM SO SFDHKJF??? #AGHHH FIRST OF ALL SLUSHIE WRITING #ALWAYS A W #and omfg the wayyyy u write the pain of losing not only a lover but a friend youve known for 20 YEAR?!?! #and how YEAH sometimes...no matter what you do the grief still follows u and ...thats normal #FUCKKKK #this is so good #AND GUY AND HONEY ANGST GRAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #keeping this close to my chest fr... #redacted verse #redacted audio #redacted asmr #redacted guy #redacted honey #redactedverse #redacted fanfic #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

redacted headcanons if they were filipino 🇵🇭

please bear w me and my scattered thoughts😭 also credits to @pandoraroid for the vincent hc it's so real

- when the shaw pack gets together they do the family gathering thing of making the kids have a dance competition for money

- angel doesn't know how to commute (public transportation) and david would have to come along with them on a jeep to help them learn

"davey ikaw pumara para sakin please nahihiya ako" "kaya mo yan, dali lalagpas na tayo oh"

("davey can you stop the jeep please i'm too shy" "you can do it, cmon we're gonna miss our stop")

- at a jollibee birthday party david would always help the shaw kids win the "bring me game" . that shit is SERIOUS for him i would bet

- milo would overdress all the time  . kahit anong ganap he will be layering IN SPITE of the heat. he'd also be called "estetik" and he HATES IT  .

(estetik: from aesthetic, used to make fun of people who dress up)

*(kahit anong ganap: whatever event there is)

- also, milo and sweetheart ukay-ukay dates perhaps. . . . but i think they'd both get carried away because they'd be blessed by the ukay gods and forget they were ever on a date

(ukay-ukay: secondhand shops in the ph!! mainly clothes)

vincent and lovely  . aircon humor x kanal humor CMAWWNN. the vampire houses alone r so extra and fancy vincent would for sure have the conyo/filipino rich ppl accent too like. 

(vin telling lovely abt his first summit): vin: "ok so inisip ko like, paano ako gaganti kay william during the summit, right? so i decided i was going to show up looking like as the, pinaka-antithesis of what he wants me to look like."

lovely, absorbing nothing of what he just said: "HUY antithesis???????"

(vin: "ok so i thought, how am i gonna get back at william during the summit, right?; ...looking like the (most)antithesis of what he wants me to look like.")

(aircon humor: humor associated with wealthy people, priv school kids, "out of touch" humor

kanal humor: "public school humor" , vulgar and relatable

conyo: someone who speaks filo+english in a pretentious way, mostly due to being raised wealthy . idk they always have that rich ppl accent)

- when honey brings guy along to hang out w/ their filo friends, he just looks at them mesmerized 90% of the time they're all talking . afterwards, when they ask abt it, guy says that honey is way more expressive when they speak in filipino and he thinks its rlly cute (IDK. I FEEL THIS ONE IN MY BONES .)

- i can't imagine guy being filipino no matter what i do. however, i think honey is for sure filo (projecting) and they wld have a complete filo friend group  . honey wld still have that gruff exterior but their walls r down, and their friends would joke that honey and guy r the "nonchalant x oa" pairing and guy wld have NO clue what they're all talkin abt.

(oa: over acting, usually used negatively to call someone dramatic, but with the "nonchalant x oa" it's kinda similar to the introvert x extrovert trope)

- i also have a hc that honey likes to draw so . stem strand/course to art course pipeline baby (many filipinos can relate🔥🔥🔥)

general idea / kinda just a joke but honestly it'd be so hard to allude to being a vamp in the philippines . 

"pag natamaan yung balat ko ng araw, nasusunog ako" "beh nasa pinas ka, lahat tayo nasusunog"

("when the sunlight hits my skin, i start to burn" "beh you're in the philippines, we're all burning")

#DAVID HELPING OUT WITH THE BRING ME LMFAOOOO #tito ng bayan na palaging may bigay na pera pag reunion #magooverstay si milo at sh sa ukay kasi gumaganda na plot ng radio drama na pinapatugtog dun #literally could hear the conyo accent in vincent i want to punch him /aff #ung kay guy ...edi sorry ginawa ko siyang pinoy!! /J /lh #FILO HONEY THOOOO #they are THE nonchalant x oa couple #also the last hc about honey....like oh! thats just me #LMFAOOOOO “you smell like the sun” (compliment) “HA?!?!” (offended) #sorry im so emotional guys ... peenoi fried or something #sten reblogs! #redacted audio #redacted asmr #redactedverse #redacted headcanons #philippines mentioned #redacted david #redacted vincent #redacted milo #redacted guy #redacted honey

[joshusten]

My favourite vampire ever, Milo Rebaine xxx

#oh my god #THIS IS SCRUMPTIOUS THANK U #OHMYGOOOOD the tits? the chest hair? the happy trail? #milo the hottest mf in every universe #AND THE WAY U RENDERED THE PANTS UWAAAA SO COOL #not that...i was....focused down there....no #but this art is so pretty and hes so pretty and i love u op #sten reblogs! #redacted audio #milo greer #redacted milo #redactedverse #redacted asmr #hotrodz

[joshusten]

omg THE james enthusiast..... AND UR SO RIGHT panganay james is so real! hes def the more quiet relatives in the family reunion HAHAHAH :"))

James James James James James James James James

i would like to award james the highest honor i can bestow.....making him filipino.....

*lower right james muttered an expletive LMAO, kinda similar vibes with "damn!" but its not rlly the actual translation

**also i think a more accurate translation for "hay, buhay..." would be "oh, what a life..."

#OFW JAMES UMUWI KA NA BABY #DI NA AKO SANAY NA WALA KA!!!! #james also listens to apo hiking and brownman revival REAL!!!!!!!

[joshusten]

james as a dad since he mentioned wanting to build a family - and a bit of context for his relationship with marcus in my project meridian AU. marcus was taken in by the ETS facilities as a teenage prodigy who ran away from home. they were impressed by his skills in creating machines and robots that would come to life. due to him being on his own most of the time- marcus wasn't the greatest at opening up to people and kept to himself a lot of the time, which is why it's such a surprise to him that he's the person responsible for the Asset's personality now.

Also yeah, marcus is younger than most of the cast here. there's something achy about making him MY age and him still figuring out how the world works

#AAAUAGSJSJSJ #bro STOP ur gonna make me SOBBBB #making marcus so young is killing me.......ough........... #AND DAD JAMES..................... #OUHGHSJSJS SHAKING MY FISTS #love seeing more of ur proj meridian au AAAAAAAAA #redacted verse #redacted audio #redacted asmr #project meridian #redacted james #redacted marcus #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

James James James James James James James James

i would like to award james the highest honor i can bestow.....making him filipino.....

*lower right james muttered an expletive LMAO, kinda similar vibes with "damn!" but its not rlly the actual translation

**also i think a more accurate translation for "hay, buhay..." would be "oh, what a life..."

#srb

[joshusten]

I started the bastard warrior series some time ago and picked it back up when I did art for GBA's art contest, now I have Zahir (he/she), my faithful and Albus. No I'm not begining to obssess with him, what are you talking about?

#devouring this art #i love ur style SO SO MUCH #THE SHAPES THE LIGHTING THE COLORS WWOWOWOWOWWWW #and UR FAITHFUL!! #HES SO COOL........... #ur designs never miss fr #mr. laveau's art gallery #mr. laveau #good boy audios #gba #gba bastard warrior #gba albus #gba faithful #gba fanart #gba albus york #good boy audios albus #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

James James James James James James James James

i would like to award james the highest honor i can bestow.....making him filipino.....

*lower right james muttered an expletive LMAO, kinda similar vibes with "damn!" but its not rlly the actual translation

**also i think a more accurate translation for "hay, buhay..." would be "oh, what a life..."

#MAYBE ITS OOC BUT WHO CARES!!!! #redacted asmr #redacted audio #redactedverse #redacted fanart #redacted james #redacted project meridian #project meridian #sten draws! #sten answers!

[joshusten]

To become a project manager at the end of times, a level of disregard to ideal working conditions was needed. James knew that all of ETS employees were bound by contract to work on the Machine. The facilities were borderline hellish- strict working hours, monitored activities- it'd be a miracle if anyone came out of it with their sanity intact. He knew that most of the unempowered employees knew nothing of the gravity of their work- all they knew was that it was an undisclosed research project. He tried bringing up more humane conditions to fellow stakeholders, only to be shut down because it was all necessary to maintain covert and order in the facility- not to mention that if any information about the meridian reached the empowered public due to their neglect- it'd only bring utter chaos and mass panic.

He splashed water on his face, trying to wash off the grime, sweat and the sticky, disgusting rage that seemed to stick to his body like a second skin. Anger at the gods of the demons that brought a catastrophic end to their world and making it everyone's responsibility. Frustration towards himself, for being a part of the elites that were busy sitting back on their asses than actually working and suffering for humanity's sake. James thought about his promise to his spouse. Let's build a family, a home together. He felt- Nothing. He steeled his expression to a public-ready, professional mask and exited the bathroom with a smile. Corporate, but serviceable.

#EUABDHEUEUEUJEJEEUEBSUSJ #the scream i scrumpt #GOOOOOD ok first of all :))) vv handsome design #And 2ND OF ALL AAAUGHHHHHHHHH james :“(((((((( #i will never shut up about how u give so much life to the characters its amazing #redacted verse #redacted audio #redacted asmr #project meridian #redacted james #slushiearts #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

"Bad day?" "Could've been better. Feels like I'm going insane from- everything. The isolation, the...mental-hospital-white sterile walls. It's like we're in prison. They even tell us what to wear! I mean, seriously, company-mandated loungewear? " "I understand. I do find myself missing...home. On days like this, I think it's best to try to think about why you are doing this. To support your loved ones. To work on something that matters." "Ha. That's easy for you to say- you have someone waiting for you with open arms." "Do you really not have... anyone? Family? Friends?" (His young coworker reminded Anton of how he used to be- callous, angry. It seems that his talent for machines- the way that he could make any scrap of metal come to life- was a cost of his solitude.) "...No. Not really. It's just me and the...wires. The machines. They're a constant. And they've served me well- I went from living on the streets, homeless, to actually making someone out of myself. But they're...cold. Means to an end. Which makes sense, in a way. Why would you give a personality to something that's meant to mitigate incoming danger? It's just- the longer I work with them- the more I feel like I'm becoming more like one. A machine." Anton gave a warm laugh. "My friend. You are young. Of course, we live alone and we die alone. But human existence...er....is not just staying alive it's finding something to live for. You can't do that when you push everyone away. Your work... is great. But what is the point of making machines alive, when you yourself are dying to make it?

#fuckkk slushie u just rlly know how to add so much more depth to these characters #im loving it so much #AND AGAIN WITH THE ART PAIRED WITH TEXT #eating this up sooo bad #redacted audio #redacted asmr #project meridian #redacted marcus #redacted anton #slushiearts #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

Commissions for the lovely @angelicaether of their David and Angel ✨

NSFW Warning under the cut—

Had to be cropped for obvious reasons, but you get the idea 👀

#FIRST OF ALL CHECK OUT PYCTH'S COMMS!!!! #THE PINCHING CHEEKS ONE AJSJDKDKDKDK #AUGHSJSJSKS CUTIE PIES !!!!! #(sees under the cut) OH! 😳 OH......... #I....IM....UH........haha............ #i dont watch a lot of david but mygod.............im.......... #pycth u always feed us with ur art AJSJSJSJ THANK U AAAAAAA #redacted verse #redacted audio #redacted asmr #redactedaudio #redactedasmr #redactedverse #redacted david #redacted angel #redacted shaw pack #pycthcomms #pycthspice #pycthsketches #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

labor of love

;; i know in canon marcus.... codes??? idk if he does manual work but i like to think he does bc there's something visceral about him having to modify asset with his bare hands; also non humanoid asset again

#project meridian fanart save me...... #BANGER AFTER BANGER AFTER BANGER SLUSHIE #AUGH THIS IS SO SO COOL I RLLY WANNA WATCH A MOVIE LIKE THIS NOW 😭 #redacted audio #redacted asmr #redacted marcus #redacted asset #project meridian #sten reblogs!

[joshusten]

imagine if asset is non humanoid

#GOD THIS IS SO FUCKING CRAZY /POS #IMAGINE PROJECT MERIDIAN LIKE THIS omfg THIS CONCEPT IS SOOO COOOOOL!!!!!! #im rlly loving how much disturbing the story would be if this were canon GOOOOD #and erm marcus erm.......... #LMAO #but this is so cool OSBSKEMWNKW #redacted audio #redacted asmr #redacted asset #redacted marcus #project meridian #sten reblogs!