mattimclean-blog

[mattimclean-blog]

the insurmountable task of making a movie

Right now I am paralyzed by fear. And it is a fear that has gripped me since roughly February 2017. Ever since my last project fell apart, i have been absolutely terrified to start anything else. 

Up until this year I have been able to start project with relative ease. Whether it was art, film, theatre or writing, I was never afraid to start something. 

Now I am absolutely crippled to even consider what I want to do next. 

Setting myself a goal to make a movie in 2018 was supposed to be motivating but instead I find myself unable to get my brain to even consider begining. 

I know that right now my life is at a crucial turning point. I just need to start it and good things  will happen. But right now, this crippling grip on my throat needs to be defeated and I don't yet know how to conquer it. 

[mattimclean-blog]

In an attempt to make myself a slightly more financially secure artist, I am diving deep and attempting to share my projects with you.  This is my Patreon. On it I will be sharing exclusive pictures of my body painting, exclusive stories and artworks, and making new art for the internet- all while I attempt to gather resources to make a film.  I hope you consider checking it out and are willing to come onboard. But if not, thanks for considering.  Lots of Love! 

[mattimclean-blog]

From a failed pilot, “Body Work” Was supposed to chronicle the growth and weight loss as I body painted myself.  When funding fell through, I had to re-evaluate the project, but I did get this rough shot out of the project.  Maybe will pick it up again sometime. 

#torontofilm #bodypaint #bodywork #humancanvasinitiative #humancanvas

[mattimclean-blog]

I’m in a funk. I could post on here about every dark place my mind is going right now, but I’m not going to do that. Instead, I’m posting this.  This was the logo for a TV show I wanted to make. It was all about my experiences body painting, and as a painting instructor. It would have been all about the creative struggles and the explosive power of painting.  One day maybe this will happen. Right now, things don’t look so great. But maybe one day this can be a thing I can look back on and say I did. 

In the meantime, I’ll use it as a reminder that I have more projects to do and as a beacon of hope that maybe I can start to do better things. 

#bodypainting #hopeful #creative #tvpilot #canada

[mattimclean-blog]

Trying to do the impossible.  Looking to make a movie happen by October next year.  Hoping to find help along the way and include you as much as possible. 

#filmmaking #movie #movie making #screenwriting #how to make a movie #independent #indie film