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No. No. No. No. No.

It’s all wrong. Not you. It’s not supposed to be you. Just stop mocking me. Stop dangling my salvation right in front of me. Stop reminding me of my inability to cut someone’s roots from my soul and how I refuse to grow beyond my pain. After all this time, I still love you. And after all this time, I should know better.

Today was another rough day. Confronting my fucked up emotions with only sleep and small amounts of what some would call schoolwork. Taking my medication has become harder due to the complete lack of structure in my life. I have little to no motivation to socialize or work. And what little work I do get done makes me feel worse when I finish it because I feel I’m so behind in everything. What little social life I had is a long 3+ hours away. And even if I were there, would he really make me any happier? he’s doing just fine tormenting me over social media. (Just to clarify, he’s just living his life. I’m just a horrible person who wants to be more involved in it, and who is slowly realizing my unimportance in everyone I love’s life.)

I don’t think they understand how empty I am without them. When I say “You are all I have and all I love.” They don’t think I’m meaning every single word. But I am. When the world comes to burn I only have/need my 2 strong supports and one of them is seemingly falling away to find a stronger shelter. And the other is also enchanted by that notion and may leave with them…. It won’t be the first time I’ve had to reconstruct and stand alone. But, my fear is, if I keep rebuilding myself stronger, I’ll eventually realize that leaning on others for support is to risky. Why bother putting faith in anyone but yourself? You’re strong and independent. Why are you suddenly to weak to stand alone? And then I’ll see the joy and warmth that comes from a home with support and trust. And the next time I fall, I’m afraid I’ll just decide to stay a crumbled mess on the ground, because the endless cycle of being torn down and rebuilt is becoming to much for myself, let alone the burden it must be for my poor little support beams. Being supportive of something that longs to be demolished must be the heaviest burden to carry in the known universe.

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Por: @deekaymotion
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Más ideas creativas en 💬➡️ somosdesigners.com
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🔥Publica tu trabajo🔥 📩
designersoficial@gmail.com
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#design #logo #diseño #graphicdesign #logotype #art #arte #artspiration #artwork #ilustracion #brand #creative #creatividad #diseñografico #lovedesign #caligraphy #inspiracion #inspiration #lettering #logotipo #branding #minimalism #marketing #wordmark #logodesign #packaging #illustration
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¡GRUPO CREATIVO! 💡⤵️
@disenadores_colombia
@somos3_creativos
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https://www.instagram.com/p/B-YKpirgk11/?igshid=7yis2t05ob13

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Elementos claves 🥰 Viene de mi #post anterior y sigue en los próximos 👉👉👉👉🍎🍓💜💙 #mymarbellaochoa #amazoninfluencer #amazonkindle .
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#contemporaryart #artgallery #pintura #myart #sketchbook #sketch #paintings #drawings #cultura #creative #pencil #artists #watercolor #art_spotlight #arts #artista #kunst #fineart #paint #modernart #likeforlikes #likeforlike #likeforlikeback #like #likeforfollow (en Spain)
https://www.instagram.com/p/B-YFRaqFxyE/?igshid=120czqim047nv

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El segundo elemento en el arte 🥰 Viene de mi #post anterior y sigue en los próximos 👉👉👉👉🍎🍓💜💙 #mymarbellaochoa #amazoninfluencer #amazonkindle .
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#contemporaryart #artgallery #pintura #myart #sketchbook #sketch #paintings #drawings #cultura #creative #pencil #artists #watercolor #art_spotlight #arts #artista #kunst #fineart #paint #modernart #likeforlikes #likeforlike #likeforlikeback (en Spain)
https://www.instagram.com/p/B-X45TWFbPA/?igshid=923cmb6g45vv

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During this lockdown, I have been absolutely bored out of my mind. One thing that has helped me is art. You may not think you’re creative or “good enough”, but you have no idea how amazing you really are. If you sat down every day and practiced what you’re good at or what you like, you will have gained knowledge and skills that you didn’t have before. Yes this virus is serious and should be taken seriously, but we can’t help but feel trapped and helpless. And that’s okay! It’s okay to feel down and worried. Just know that this won’t last forever and that there are people who care for you. Keep carrying on

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Originally posted by hellofeysandarling

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