motherphoebe

[motherphoebe]

“that’s my favorite fictional character and I get to torture him !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😤”

— AO3 fanfic writers

[motherphoebe]

The Parting Glass

Annie Cresta as a career in the 70th Hunger Games.

Chapter 2:

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𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝

Now is absolutely not the time to panic, to let myself fall apart so quickly is simply not an option. But, I’ve never seen footage from the tribute's goodbyes, I have no reason to worry about how I’ll be seen, so I walk across the hard floors and sink deep into the blue couch with my knees to my chest. It’s made of a soft, plush material I’ve never seen before, one that seems far too warm and unreasonable for District 4. Suddenly the door opens and my family, absent my father, are my first visitors.

Muriel takes the lead into the room and immediately sweeps me into a huge, tearful hug. When I meet my mothers eyes the air feels like it's knocked out of my chest, like when the ocean traps you under the tide, I know no resolution for this feeling. My mother joins the hug, I know that cameras await me outside this room, but the tears escape my eyes unrelentingly. This cannot be the last time I embrace my mother and sister.

“I love you my Poppy, you need to come home to me.”

She manages those few words before she bursts into tears. Suddenly I realize the position my mother is in, her youngest daughter, her baby, is being sent away to the games to possibly never return. Who will she wake for school in the morning, make tea with cinnamon for, ask for opinions on her crochet?

“I’m sorry Mom. Don’t worry, I’ll come home, I promise. I’ll do everything I can to come home.”

My voice is shaky and muffled in my mothers shoulder. I use my palms to rid my face of tears, and face the rest of my family. I clear my voice to ensure my next statement is heard as clearly as possible.

“I need you all to know that I’m going to fight. But if I don’t come back, please, please promise me you will all be okay.”

My efforts to clear my face of tears are useless, because as soon as I’m finished pleading, they seem to roll down my cheeks in never ending streams. I have no doubts that I could win the Hunger Games, but there have been years where even the strongest tributes don’t make it to the end. If I die, I can only hope their promise can bring me peace in my final moments.

“I can’t promise Annie. There is no way we could survive without you, but we know you’ll be back. You have to come back, my children will need their aunt Annie to teach them how to swim. You’re the strongest fighter out of all of us, you prove it time and time again in training. You’re smart, use your wits and the skills you’re good at and win this.”

Skipper stares at me with such a steady look I feel my tears are now over dramatic. I’ve never seen him look so much like our father. My mother and sister are far too inconsolable to respond, so I don't bother begging for them to promise me. I begin to reply to Skipper, but the peacekeeper guarding my door barges in, announcing that it's time for them to go. I grasp on to all of them, unable to accept that my last few moments with my family could be over.

“We’ll see you soon Annie, I love you! Wear the necklace in-”

Muriel’s voice cracks as she's abruptly cut off by the slamming of the door, but I heard enough to assume she wants me to wear the seastar and pearl necklace she made me as a token.

I hear my father talking, and then the door opens to allow him to rush in. Suddenly he's hugging me the same way he did when I was hurt as a young child. He smells like the sail boat as he always does, although it's not pleasant it is comforting. He places his hands on my shoulders, forcing us to be face to face.

“Listen to me Annie Cresta, you are the strongest girl I know. Do you remember when I first took you on the boat? You were younger than Muriel and Skipper, and somehow caught more fish than the two of them combined. I asked you how you did it and you said-”

“They like me because they know I’m a mermaid, so they wanted to help me beat Muriel and Skip” I finish his sentance, the memory brings a genuine smile to my face. I was so excited to finally be old enough to join them on the boat, and also genuinely believed I was a mermaid with how much time I spent in the ocean.

“You are a winner Annie, you can do anything if you put your mind to it. You have eight years of training, you know what you’re good at, survive and come home to us. I love you so dearly, my sweet daughter. I believe you’ll do what it takes to win.”

His eyes become dangerously full of tears. I’m unable to think of what to do, I’d never put much thought into being in a situation where my father would cry in front of me. I bury my face in his chest so I avoid his tears and think about his words. Of course, what it takes to win means ensuring the deaths of those around me, including the death of my district partner, and life long friend Bodie. There can only be one victor. I’ve been given such little time to think about this, my initial shock is just now wearing off and the complexity of my situation leaves me winded.

“I promise I’ll do whatever it takes. I know I can win but, what do I do about Bodie? Dad I can’t-”

“And you won’t. Stay with him as long as you can. Annie, only one of you can come home, and it has to be you. I need you to know it has to be you. His mother wants to talk to you after this, I told her I’d ask you if that was fine.”

He chooses careful words, but the thought still causes effects deep within me. My body begins to shake uncontrollably. I decide now I won’t be anywhere near Bodie when the time comes. I think about Bodies mother, the kind and gentle woman who’d fed us crackers and jam after swims and watched us play on the beach and run from the shore. How could she want to visit me if my survival means her son's death? She must want to say goodbye, and I don’t want to deny her that. I nod my head quickly.

“Yes, please. Tell them she's the last one, I can’t talk to anyone else.”

He simply nods and holds me while we wait for the peacekeeper to say our time is up. I’ve always found I understand my father better than anyone else in my family, I believe it's because we think alike. We both stand here in a silent hug until the peacekeeper arrives again to collect my father.

“You’re strong, Annie Cresta.” The door opens and soon he's gone, and I’m alone. He says I'm strong like it's a fact, written in stone and one hundred percent true. I’m unsure, but I decide to believe him, I really have no other choice.

Mrs. Cormoran walks in shortly after, her auburn hair is tied up and her eyes are bloodshot, cheeks still wet with tears. She's just left her son's room, the only remaining person in her family, unsure if she’ll ever see him again, and now must bid farewell to her second daughter who shares the same fate. I lose my composure, hot tears run down my face once more.

“Come here sweetie.”

She holds me in a hug I can only describe as motherly. I have known her son Bodie my whole life. He’s always been there, they say we saw each other in the market one day and instantly became friends, playing with the rubber baits that hung off the fishing lines in the random shop above us. We’d beg everyday to play on the sand together, our houses close enough to one another to justify the walk. I haven’t seen him as much as I used to the past few years. His family couldn’t afford the extra fishing quota required to get Bodie eligible for training, which forced us to have a lot less time together. Our hangout time was reduced to our hours at school, the rest whatever I could squeeze in after training. When his father passed away in a fishing accident a few years ago, our time was cut even shorter than before. His mothers income couldn't afford to feed the two of them, so he started working any job he could, officially leaving school to become a fisherman. It’s an option a lot of the children in District 4 resolve to; there is always a need for fishermen and as long as you fit on a boat, you’re eligible. They say the age limit is 13, but I’ve seen kids as young as 10 walking to the docks in the morning.

Now I sit here with Bodie’s mother, knowing her son and I are headed into an arena where only one of us can return alive. The feeling of guilt weighs on me heavier than anything. How can I feel so comfortable saying I’ll win even though it ensures his death? Especially when his mother needs him, he’s all she has. I’ve already decided that I have to win, but if I can’t it has to be Bodie.

We simply stand here silently in our tearful hug until the door opens, and Mrs. Cormoran is being swiftly let out. I run to her and grab her hand before the peacekeepers begin to drag her out.

“I’ll do everything I can.”

They’re simple words that I hope will bring her the comfort she needs.

Now I stand here alone. I wipe my cheeks and take a few deep breaths while I stare out of the huge windows directly to the sea. Tonight my friends will be out there swimming, finally able to breathe knowing they are safe from one more year of the games. My sister will probably drag her husband to our family's house, and spend the night in our old shared bedroom. If it weren’t so hot out I'm sure all the windows would be closed shut, forcing the outside world to be as closed off as possible. My mother would be boiling mint on the broken down stove and preparing for a sleepless night.

What did I mean when I said I’d do everything I could? One of the first things they tell us in academy is that our actions on camera are extremely important. Once I heard that, I started to notice that the most well liked tribute every year is almost shaped into a character, someone that is relatable to the audience. What I don’t know is if that's something we decide now, or once we are with our mentors. I know without a doubt that I looked like a fool at the reaping, my lack of realization is surely going to make me look unaware to everyone who watches it. Is that something I can work with? I can’t remember if I’ve ever seen anyone play dumb before in the games I’ve studied. It doesn't matter because I didn't think to commit to it, I held my head high after and only faltered slightly when Bodies name was called.

I have never seen the tributes hug instead of shaking hands though, but that wasn’t part of my plan. I couldn’t do anything else once I saw the look in his eyes. That will definitely be on the replay, maybe even talked about by Caesar Flickerman and Claudius Templesmith for a while before moving onto District 5.

Although it’s a horrific thought, I might be able to use Bodie being my district partner to my advantage. It's disgusting, despicable even, but if I make it clear that I’m more prepared than Bodie, take him under my wing and train him, it would make both of us stand out, and show how capable I am. As much as it feels wrong, It’s not an awful plan. I’d be doing this all anyway, and I could get the two of us possible sponsor gifts while I’m at it. I hate the direction my thoughts have gone.

The heat in the room is becoming unbearable, the constant pacing I’m doing doesn’t help either, and after checking for the 3rd time, I’m completely sure these huge windows do not open. The walls feel like they're closing in on me. I think I’ve spent an eternity here, thinking about who I should be and how I will act, two things I’ve never put so much thought into, it usually comes to me easily. If I had been sat down last night and asked these questions, I might have been able to answer.

I’m Annie Cresta, the third child of Catriona and Kieran Cresta. I love my family and friends, helping people, watching my sister weave, my brother's wife and her piglets, being under the waves and hearing them crash above, diving deep and finding beautiful shells, my mothers face when I bring them home. I think I can be kind and outgoing, but I also like to be alone. My dad says I put a lot of effort into caring about the people around me. I know I do well in the literature parts of school, but poor in mathematics. This is true.

None of this seems important though, when I’m also trained to kill and survive the Hunger Games. Somehow I’ve overanalyzed and torn myself so far apart, I’m unsure how to put me back together. I spend a lot of time alone with my thoughts, but I’ve never been so destructive. I try to repeat the things I know about me in my head, but I don't have much time to decide what's true before I’m reminded that I’m in custody, and officially the property of the Capitol. I guess Annie will have to be a girl with a tear stained face and shy smile for now.

The peacekeeper opens the door and orders me to walk out, which I do gladly, the outside summer sun and heat seems infinitely better than the stuffy room that was slowly suffocating me. I’m led through a back exit, far from anywhere I’ve ever been before, and shuffled into a car. I’ve never been in one before, but I see them in footage from the Capitol all the time. I’ll admit, a car seems quite silly to me, one of my favorite things to do is walk around District 4, with the seagulls above and the waves crashing around me. I sit alone in the back for a few seconds until I’m joined by Bodie. His face is just as puffy and tear stricken as I imagine mine to be. His eyes are just as blue as they’ve always been, but he's no longer the 8 year old boy I imagine him as. He looks so tired and scared, and somehow, my heart aches more than it already was. I reach across the carseats, and pull him into a tight embrace, doing everything I can to comfort him.

“Annie.”

It's all he says but it's enough.

I can clearly hear the uncertainty in his voice, and it's like I can hear the thoughts plaguing his brain. His mother, how she’ll be all alone, if she’ll be able to afford life until he's back, if he comes back. The thought of Bodie never coming back reminds me he’s never trained, but no one could ever tell. He's got at least 7 inches of height on me, and although I’m not necessarily tall for a girl my age, he's one of the tallest people I know. Besides that, he's somewhat bulky, his years fishing have built up his muscle making his arms muscular and shoulders broad. He could easily pass as a training academy tribute, if we play that angle.

“I think we are headed to the train now, there's normally footage of this on the television right? Don’t cry Bodie, stand tall and strong, try and look tough when they’re filming us, trust me.”

I grab his hand and squeeze it firmly and make direct eye contact with him, something I’ve learned helps me get my way, although I’m sure he has no reason to object. He nods and I give him a pleased smile which makes him let out a breathy laugh.

“Did you forget that I know you quite well Annie? You don't need to intimidate me, I trust you.”

The car ride is short compared to the walk it would've been to get to the train station. Maybe a car would be nice for the treacherous hills that burn my calves. When we pull in, I can see the cameras and crew that await us at the entrance of our train, and squeeze Bodies hand one more time before plastering a smile on my face. Prisca emerges from the crowd and comes to collect us, her gloved hands lightly pushing my back. I'm glad I was already smiling, it makes it easier to hide the confusion I have for how she manages to wear the garments she chose in heat like this.

I act like I’m barely affected by the unusual amount of attention I’m getting, I even find myself waving and saying hello to people trying to get my attention. I wonder where they came from, and why they yell my name at me like that, but keep a pleasant smile on regardless. I think Bodie does great as well but I’m unsure, Prisca made him walk behind me, something about him covering me from the cameras on the left.

Once we enter the train, I’m immediately taken back by how luxurious the cart I’m in is. The floors are made of a deep blue plush carpet, much like the couch was in the justice building. Almost everything is accented in gold or silver, the walls are riddled with delicate swirls that look like a wave crashing. It takes a lot of effort to not let my mouth drop wide open, instead I keep my smile and look around. I’m very enthralled by the hanging lights that are somehow encased in crystal when Prisca pipes up, reminding me I’m not alone.

“You both may go to your rooms! I’ll call you for dinner, but if you’re feeling chatty before that we will all be in the second cart!”

She clasps her hands together and bounces away as she goes to speak to the crowd of people outside, not giving me enough time to ask how I’m supposed to know where my room is. I look at Bodie and almost begin laughing, until a Capitol attendant leads us both to our temporary rooms.

When we arrive at my room, I thank the man and he almost looks shocked. Once inside I examine what my small room holds: a large bed, dresser and closet, attached bathroom with a scary looking shower, and not much else. I decide that I should probably wash off, seeing as I’ve sweat more than enough today. Plus I’ve never used a real shower before. Back home we only have a bath, and the showers at the beach, but those hardly count, they only spray the cold seawater right back at you. I remove my dress and fold it, and then decide it should probably be hung, it’s nice enough to be reused or sold if it's returned to my family. I take the orange bow out of my hair and clip it on the neckline of the dress, but I keep my necklace around my neck. When Muriel sells her jewelry to the people at the market she always makes sure to include how they don't tarnish in water, unlike the beams of the peacekeeper towers that overlook the sea we fish in, as if anyone would look at her work and question its quality.

.

I press multiple wrong buttons on the shower before I finally figure out how to start the water. It's coming out of 4 spouts, and is almost freezing cold, but if I close my eyes I can pretend I’m standing in the showers on the beach. That is until I breathe in and smell the citrusy soap that I accidentally sprayed on the wall and acknowledge the lack of waves, but I still allow myself to live in the little fantasy for a while.

Once the freezing water begins to make my teeth chatter, I decide it's best I end my shower. The buttons and products are better labeled outside of the shower; I press one that instantly dries me off, and then use a balm that untangles my hair and makes it fully dry in under a minute. When I look in the mirror I’m actually quite impressed, my hair falls on my back silky smooth, the usual curl looking bouncier than normal.

The closet is full of brand new clothes, they all seem to be my size, but they are definitely not my style. I run my hands through the silky, freshly washed clothes and decide on a simple pair of pants and a shirt. There's no use in wearing anything cute, no cameras will see me until we arrive at the Capitol, and by then I should know what look I want to achieve. Maybe at dinner I’ll talk to my mentor about-

I didn't realize until right now that I completely spaced out when they announced this year's mentors. I think I was staring at the back of Eimears head wondering if she knew her hair band had broken. If I decide to play dumb, I really won't have to play at all. I roll my eyes at myself and consider going to Bodies room, or even the dining cart early, but ultimately I lay on the soft sheets of my bed and let them engulf me along with my thoughts.

Although I didn’t volunteer, maybe I can act like I was planning to since I’m already eighteen. It’ll make me look less scared, which will be of utmost importance when Bodie and I meet the tributes from Districts 1 and 2.

I know deep down I should keep strategizing, but my mind races quicker than the tide recedes, and I start to think about useless things to comfort myself. How many times could I press the buttons in the shower before the soap runs out? Where do they keep the laundry in a train like this? How will they get the sand from my shoes out of the thick carpet? I stare at the ceiling and drift away into my useless thoughts.

“Annie! It's Prisca!”

Her voice makes me jump halfway out of the bed. She knocks three times on my door, and then opens it immediately after before I’m able to let her in.

“Oh perfect you’ve showered! Dinner will be in ten minutes, I came early to tell you to change but it seems you already have! Goody!”

She claps her hands together and gawks at me like I’m a child just learning how to function, but it doesn't irk me, it only makes me giggle.

“Oh, you’re just precious! Don’t distract me with that smile Miss Cresta, I must inform Bodie of dinner as well!”

She bounces away and closes the door behind her, and I wonder why all her sentences sound like they're overly excited questions. I decide pretty quickly that while she’s unlike anyone I’ve met in 4, that doesn’t make me like her any less. Plus, I’m sincerely hoping her infatuation with me is because I’m interesting, not just the way she is with every tribute.

I sit down on the bed and braid and unbraid the longest strands of my hair until I decide just about ten minutes have passed. Somehow I make my way down the hall, through a few carts, and end up in the dining area. Bodie isn’t at the table yet, and Prisca is sitting down with only one of my two mentors. It’s Mags Flanagan, the oldest victor District 4 has.

“Hi, I’m Annie Cresta. I don’t think I’ve met you before, but my sister says you love her earrings she sells at the market.”

I extend my hand to shake hers, but she simply grabs mine and holds it gently in her aged palm. She’s one of the most respected people in District 4, I’ve heard she's the reason we bring home as many victors as we do.

“Mariel, right? With the blonde hair and big brown eyes and the tapestries?”

I can’t help but laugh at her mispronunciation of my sister's name, knowing that’s one of the things that drives her the most crazy.

“Muriel, yes! I barely have time to work at the stall with her, but I know she’s always buzzing with excitement on days she sees you.”

As I speak, a plate is placed in front of me, and then I allow myself to look at the array of food on the table. Different kinds of meat covered in colored sauces, fruits and vegetables I’ve never seen before, even drinks that have bubbles in them. I try to hide my shock, but sometimes I forget other people survive on a diet that's not mostly seafood.

“Oh! This is my favorite part! Annie, you can eat absolutely anything here! The Capitol has fine cuisine, you’ll see much more once we actually arrive. Believe it or not, this is the low quality stuff!”

She laughs, and I have to convince myself I’m not bothered at the way she's gawking at me, because I’m actually extremely excited to start trying all these foods. I just smile at her and begin with a piece of meat that's filled with a creamy purple sauce. It’s unlike anything I have ever eaten before, it has to be from a bird, but I’m having trouble figuring out which one. I’ve tried various meats besides fish before, and none of them were nearly as flavorful as this is.

Bodie joins us once I’ve tried most of the food, and I can't help but introduce him to it all, having second servings as I do. His reactions are just as entertaining to me as mine were to Prisca, and we both eat and laugh until we physically can't anymore. If the food weren’t so good, I could swear we were back home in District 4, I can see this in Bodies face as Priscas voice snaps us back to reality.

“Alright! They will be doing the replay of the reaping ceremonies in five minutes! Come come, let’s sit on the couch and watch! Leave your dishes!”

My stomach is as full as it’s ever been making the walk to the lounging area difficult. I sit on the couch next to Bodie while Prisca sits on an overly extravagant chair and turns up the volume of the television.

“There you are, I’ve made you a plate. Eat on the couch.”

I hear Mags behind me, and whip my head around to see Finnick Odair, only an hour late to dinner. The light circles forming under his eyes make him look tired, maybe he’d accidentally fallen asleep. It's perfect that he is our second mentor, he is the most recent victor and I know for a fact he’ll be able to help Bodie get all of the knowledge he needs about the games. When we make eye contact, his sea-green eyes look at me with recognition, and a slight smile that quickly turns into a smirk.

“I think I remember you, from training academy. Annie, right?”

“Well, that is the name they called me by at the reaping ceremony, isn’t it?”

My tone is playful, but Finnicks is one I can only describe as seductive. I can’t help but smile and hope the blush creeping onto my cheeks isn’t noticeable. Despite his demeanor, I know that he actually knows my name, and it actually feels like I'm joking with him the way we did as kids. I haven’t seen Finnick long enough to talk to him since his last days at the training academy. After his victory he obviously had no more need for it and when he moved to Victors Village he was no longer at the spots around town I’d always seen him at.

“Hmm. Suddenly Annie doesn't ring a bell. I’m sure you remember Finnick Odair though.”

Finnick ends his sentance with a wink and I figure his charming tone and newly signature smirk are something he’s adopted during his time as a victor. I roll my eyes at him and sit facing forward again, now facing towards the television. I’ve seen him like this on the television, maybe the women of the Capitol fall for it, but it does little for me, I prefer the fourteen year old boy I knew. Once the anthem of Panem begins, I take a deep breath while Bodie puts his hand on my knee to stop its bouncing.

Districts 1 and 2 produce their usual well fed, intimidating volunteer tributes. Particularly the boy from 1 is somewhat horrifying, not only does his size make him look years older than he actually is, his eagerness to be a tribute makes him seem especially bloodthirsty. The pair from 2 also seem to be acquainted, but not nearly as closely as Bodie and I. All together, the four of them seem to have their strategies down, I have not an ounce of doubt in their confidence and ability to win.

There's nothing special about the pair from 3, but when we get to 4 I hold my breath. I watch Prisca call my name and see my dumbfounded confusion. I don’t look as absentminded as I had thought, but anyone studying me will definitely notice. The hosts compliment the orange bow in my hair, saying that paired with the blue of the dress, it's sure to be the color palette of the summer. The bow just makes my heart ache as I think of my mother. I watch myself as I walk to the stage with my head high and my smile unwavering.

“You weren’t paying attention, were you?”

I jump at the volume of Finnick's voice, he’s now standing right next to me. He must have been extremely silent, I'm not sure how I was so unaware of his arrival. Was I even paying attention just now?

“If I’m being honest, I didn’t even know you were a mentor until you walked into this cart.”

I admit and shrug my shoulders. I don’t see the point in lying, if Finnick noticed my aloofness, I’m sure the other mentors and tributes have too. I’m sure they’ll keep track of how easily distracted I am and use it against me, and it won’t be hard considering how the back of a girl's head kept me entertained for half the reaping ceremony.

“Well you also didn't notice that I’ve been standing next to you for about five minutes.”

He shakes his head and laughs. I can’t argue with this, so I just shrug and continue watching the television. Maybe later on he’ll give me some tips on how to pay attention.

After the hosts are done talking about blue and orange, they show Prisca calling Bodies name. I can see his full reaction, and I’m relieved that he looks a lot more stoic than I originally thought. They cut to a shot of the two of us standing on stage, and I can’t lie, we look like an intimidating team, regardless of our emotional state. When they get to the end, they spend a while showing us hugging instead of shaking hands, discussing how it’s obvious District 4 has two tributes who know each other going in this year, and how they are just dying to see how this turns out. I turn to look at Bodie, he just stares at the television making a face I’ve never seen before.

It’s almost like when the children would tease him at school mixed with the face he made as he told me his father had died, but it’s not until his eyes meet mine that I am able to fully take in the disparity and disgust painting his face. Somehow seeing him like this hurts me more than what the hosts said.

“This is sick, I’m glad to know they’re dying to see our deaths.”

He scoffs, and although he says this under his breath, his words are venomous and laced with hatred. I figured one of his first thoughts would be how in the best scenario only one of us can make it out alive, but what I hadn’t realized was that he’d spent his time seething, not strategizing. I know that no words I say to him right now will put him at ease, so I pull him in a one sided hug and try to wipe my memory of the way he just looked at me before the feeling of dread swallows me whole.

By the time I'm watching the screen again, they are showing the tributes from District 7. I wasn’t fully paying attention until I saw the boy tribute can’t be any older than 13, and only has one hand. His partner is an older girl, and the way she looks at him makes me think she wants to protect him the same way I want to protect Bodie. I make a mental note to avoid them in the arena. The boy from 10 seems to have a chance but he trips on his way to the stage and the hosts laugh about that for a while. Districts 8,9,11, and 12 produce either young children, or kids that look as if they’ve never had a full meal in their lives.

Seeing these children with no chance is absolutely horrific, and knowing their odds against me feels even worse, but I will do whatever it takes for and I to survive, even if it ensures their deaths.

They never tell you at training that ‘quick’ and ‘logical’ thinking devoid of emotion will make you feel repulsed with yourself.

I’m able to let out a breath I wasn’t aware I was holding while Prisca shuts the television off and claps her hands together.

“Well! I think we will have a very entertaining game this year! We should arrive in the Capitol by tomorrow morning! I’ll be getting a good night's sleep, those cameras will still record you, even with bags under your eyes!”

She points to Finnick and then promptly exits the room. Bodie scoffs, but I can’t stop the giggle from escaping my lips, I’m starting to think she's always this bubbly and it's not just for the crowd. Mags bids us a goodnight as well, and soon it’s just me inbetween Finnick and Bodie, who’s looking at me with an eyebrow raised.

“I’m starting to think Prisca’s always that giddy no matter what. I know I've been bad at paying attention recently, but I honestly can't even imagine being as unaware as she is.”

This makes them laugh, and I see the ease slowly creep back into Bodies face. What I really want to ask is when do we start strategizing officially? I want to know how to act when we arrive tomorrow, and Finnick's opinion is one of the most important. But I refrain, not only for Bodies sake, but because there is no way for me to explain how I think we can work with the angle of how we know each other after his reaction to what the hosts said.

“Prisca is right! Wouldn’t want bags under our eyes on the way to the Hunger Games! Get some sleep Annie, you’re starting to look scary!”

Bodie attempts an impression of Prisca, and although hes being sarcastic it’s something I could imagine her saying. He gets up from the couch and tries to walk like her for a second before giving up and leaving the cart normally. It’s just Finnick and I in the cart now and once I’m sure Bodie is far enough away I ask what I’ve been wanting to the whole day.

“I know it seems like I wasn’t paying attention then, but I’ve been keeping track of everything. When do we start planning? Strategizing I mean, officially. I want to know how to act when we arrive tomorrow. I think we can really work with the angle of how we know each other. Because I want to be with Bodie the whole time, especially in the career pack, Bodie hasn't ever trained and-”

My voice cracks and I have to stop because tears are forming in my eyes. I quickly wipe them away, but when I look back in Finnicks green eyes, they are softer than I’ve ever seen them. He’s looking at me the way Muriel did when she said goodbye to me, like I’m a wounded and hopeless kitten, except it doesn’t make me feel that way. Somehow, I feel like he understands.

“How do I go into that arena with my best friend Finnick? I’m awful. I need him to be capable, not so he can win, so I dont have to die for him. He’s spent all day thinking about how awful this situation is and all I’ve done is think of how to make it work for us.”

I dont know what about Finnicks look made me trust him enough to say these things I barely even accepted I was feeling, but now my knees are to my chest and I’m sobbing. Maybe its because I know this conversation will stay between us, especially if I die within the next week. I go to stand up to leave the couch, embarrassed by my lack of composure, but Finnick places his hand on my shoulder and squeezes it. When I look at him again, he hesitates before he pulls me into a sidehug. Maybe my emotional spectrum is making him think I’ve gone mad since we last talked.

“You are not awful Annie. Don’t worry about any of that right now, you’re not evil for the way you’ve been feeling, and you’re right, the sooner we can strategize the better for you both. And about Bodie– You said he hasn’t trained before? He’s not as prepared for this emotionally as you are so of course he hasn’t started thinking from a players point of view yet. I think so far you’re doing great, and you have a point, the audience has already made notice of your friendship. He’ll benefit greatly from your expertise, and you will both benefit from being a team.”

I realize his voice lacks the charm he’d been speaking with earlier. These words come from the Finnick Odair I knew 5 years ago, the boy with a district 4 accent, not the Capitols darling who purrs just as posh as they do. It could be because we are alone, but I feel like he’s let his guard down with me. Even though he is one of my mentors, he did not have to genuinely comfort me, this is him treating me as a friend, not a tribute. By the way he continues to hug me like hes scared to touch me, I officially decide my random outburst has made him uncomfortable and try to fix it.

“I’m sorry. Thank you Finnick. I know you technically have to be helpful, but I appreciate it, even if I didn’t know you were my mentor until after dinner.”

He laughs and I can't help but notice his genuine smile, I decide I like it better then his smirk. I can’t help but blush at our proximity as I realize he truly has stayed just as sweet despite becoming quite handsome. Maybe this is how he gets all of his lovers in the Capitol, but that doesn’t seem right. They only show him as a smug man, who takes his lovers gifts and ditches them after one night, but the boy sitting in front of me seems too genuine for that. Half of District 4 would not believe me if I told them Finnick Odair held me as I cried, just out of the kindness of his heart, not for a lavish gift or an inexplicable amount of money.

“Technically, I just have to be here, I don’t really have to be helpful, but you’re lucky I like you Cresta. I have hope in you, especially if you can still throw knives like you did at thirteen years old.”

I feel the blush grow on my cheeks and feel silly. Although I used to be close friends with him, his statement of liking me gives me a feeling I can’t explain. Maybe it’s because of how genuine his words feel to me, like they are natural and take no effort for him to say, or because of how his sea green eyes stare into mine so thoughtfully, like he can see behind my eyes straight into my mind. I decide that if I win, I’ll put a lot of effort into making people see Finnick for who he really is. I’d also like to spend as much time looking into his eyes as possible, but nobody has to know that.

“I’d like to think I am. Maybe even a little bit more talented at throwing a spear, a couple of inches taller too. It’s weird because you look the same as you did at fourteen to me though?”

He gasps, feigning shock, then immediately stands and flexes his muscular arms and I can’t help but laugh. He throws on his smirk again, and shows off his growth in various ways, at one point even rubbing his hands over an obviously bare chin as if theres a beard.

“Go to bed boy, enough of that.”

Mags waddles into the cart, her bathrobe drags on the floor as she approaches the hot tea. Finnick puts his hand up to salute while her back is to us, but as soon as she turns he immediately puts his hand down.

“Yes ma'am! I mean Mags! We’ll go to bed now, sorry.”

His sentence starts with a cocky tone, but when she gives him an unamused face, he backs down. I try to contain my laughter at how he just acted, just like Muriel did when she’d try to get Skip in trouble not knowing my parents would just make them both do chores.

“She really put you in your place, huh?”

I whisper as we rush down to the cart where my bedroom is located. Finnick doesn't respond until we reach my door.

“Yeah she does that. She’s more like my mother than a colleague honestly.”

He wears a small smile, but I can see the pain he hides behind his eyes. I’d forgotten about his mothers passing, she was a lovely woman who raised Finnick on her own after her husband's death. Just like Bodies mom.

I walk into my room as he leans on the doorway. We just look at each other, and somehow it isn’t awkward, I feel like I’m examining him in a way I never have before, not recently at least. There is something so complex about him, the way he goes between his Capitol persona and real personality. I know it's important to act for sponsors, but this seems to go above and beyond that. I haven’t found an explanation for why he dates Capitol women, or acts so smug in front of Prisca, but it doesnt matter when he’s in front of me with guard down.

It’s like he snaps back to reality, he stands up straighter and takes his hand off the door frame.

“Sorry Annie, you should get to sleep. Prisca will wake you up for breakfast tomorrow. Goodnight.”

I barely have a chance to respond before he closes the door, leaving me alone. I’m glad Finnick is one of my mentors, I don’t think I could be in a better position. We’ll be able to come up with a way to get Bodie and I as far as possible.

As I begin to get ready for bed, the questions I’ve been ignoring become too loud to suppress. What would I do if it's Bodie and I in the final two? What would I do if Bodie tried to kill me? The worst thought is what would I do if I killed Bodie. I immediately hit my palm to my head hoping it will bring some sense to me.

I need to remain rational and composed, I can’t be thinking of these things now, not anytime before they happen. All I have to focus on is getting Bodie through training, into the career pack, and past the blood bath. We’ll have to separate at some point and there is no way for me to know when right now, when we haven't even arrived in the Capitol yet.

I’ve always been able to spend so much time caught up in my mind, especially on nights when sleep doesn't come to me easily. Normally the thoughts that keep me awake are harmless. If tomorrow will be hot, if they’ll continue the extended fishing quota, if my mother will make me run errands for her. I don't mind those thoughts, they don’t make me wish for silence. They’re nothing like my thoughts now about the inevitable death of my friend for my survival.

As I lay in the bed, I realize I’m starting to dislike being left alone. What comforted me just this morning suddenly leaves me spiraling and I’m horrified accept it, but, I think I have a new answer to my question from earlier in the justice building.

Who am I?

I’m Annie Cresta, a girl who would use her best friend being reaped to her advantage. This is true.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

thank you for reading!! i hope you guys enjoyed this long chapter, if you have any feedback/ thoughts message me or leave a comment because i’m open to ideas and criticisms!! i literally have no clue what im doing i just have an idea of annie as a career and a dream ngl. i also uploaded this on ao3, my user there is the same as here :)))

#annie cresta #finnick odair #finnick and annie #the hunger games #thg #odesta #finnick x annie #thg fanfiction #the hunger games finnick #the parting glass #the 70th hunger games #ao3 fanfic

[motherphoebe]

Before she was "mad”, Annie Cresta was a Career.

Although Annie is generally depicted as someone who has always been a relatively timid (or even 'weak') character, I think there is a far more convincing argument to be made for Annie being a Career tribute. For the sake of organisation (and preserving my sanity), I've split this into three main points: the purpose of Annie's character, misconceptions about the 70th Hunger Games and the likelihood of Finnick being a Career compared to Annie.

(Note: this ended up being a lot longer than intended, so uhh... sorry in advance.)

The purpose of Annie's character, and how this relates to her being a Career:

Given that District 4 is a Career district, it is not entirely beyond the realm of possibility that Annie received some form of training prior to her Games. It is also worth noting that she was 18 at the time of the 70th Hunger Games (according to the Hunger Games Exhibition, Annie was 23 during the events of Catching Fire, thus making her 18 years old at the time she was reaped). So you have a girl from a Career district who is reaped at the age that Careers tend to volunteer. Of course, this could just be a coincidence - Annie's name would've been in the reaping bowl 7 times by this point (assuming she hadn't applied for tesserae), so it could've just been poor luck that she was chosen. However, I think it's important to consider the purpose of Annie's character when pursuing this line of argument.

One of the most significant aspects of her character is how deeply she is affected by the Hunger Games. Although Suzanne Collins very clearly demonstrates how the Games affect the victors in various ways, Annie can potentially be seen as the personification of this trauma. Almost every time she is mentioned or is present in a scene, the impact the Games had on her is also brought to the reader's attention. During the reaping for the Quarter Quell - the first time her character is mentioned - Annie is described as being "hysterical".

The next significant mention of her is during the jabberjay attack in the arena, and Peeta subsequently refers to her as "the one who went mad".

Annie's character is inextricably tied to her trauma - it haunts the narrative of every scene she appears in. In Mockingjay, for example, Finnick’s suggestion to Peeta (that he simply ask someone for help if he is unsure about whether something is real or not) is inspired by Annie’s response to her own trauma. Even in more lighthearted moments such as after Annie and Finnick's wedding, the Games' influence on her is both alluded to and stated outright. For instance, she is described as being "lost in some daze of happiness", then revealed to be prone to flashbacks / disassociation.

On its own, the phrase “lost in some daze” does not seem to carry too much weight; but given that the words most frequently used to describe Annie are "mad", "unstable", "strange" and now (even in a moment of relative peace and joy) "lost" and in a "daze", it only strengthens the idea that as a result of her Games Annie is, as some might say, not quite all there. Almost every mention of her is tied to the impact the Games had on her. Perhaps even more compelling is a throwaway comment made by Johanna:

Although Johanna is acknowledging that the Games changed all of the victors in some way, there is an implication that Annie's transformation was the most dramatic. "Don't get me started" - as if the Games changed Annie so thoroughly, so completely that hardly anything of the person she was before remains. In short, Annie's character can be seen as a symbol of how the Games (or traumatic experiences in general) can change a person.

So what does this have to do with Annie being a Career?

Assuming that this is the purpose of her character, then Annie herself must have been irrevocably changed by the Games in order for this narrative to work. If Annie had always been a rather timid, 'fragile' character, the difference between who she was before vs after the Games would not be as stark (that is not to say she would not still be traumatised, only that this imagined version of who she was before the Games is not all that different to the person Katniss is introduced to in the trilogy). However, if Annie were to have been a Career, this would further emphasise the theme of how trauma can change a person and make this message all the more impactful.

Picture Annie as a cunning, skilled fighter. Imagine her as being adept at strategising and familiar enough with combat that she can remain level-headed during high-stress situations. Think of her as a tribute that many people were betting on to win - they were that confident in her abilities as a Career. Envision her as being bloodthirsty, prideful - honoured to represent her district and bring it glory. Annie with a sense of superiority and overconfidence, possessing a tendency to underestimate her opponents. Annie with her district partner, who she had known and trained with for years, and trusted enough to know that he would not turn on her before the time came when they had no choice but to go their separate ways.

Now imagine the character we are introduced to in Catching Fire - the "hysterical young woman" whom everyone believes to be "mad". Annie, who seems to lose her hold on reality every now and then, closing her eyes and covering her ears, falling into a state that seemingly only Finnick can pull her out of. Picture the devastation she must have felt when she saw her district partner - someone she trusted deeply and had come to care for - be decapitated right before her eyes. The realisation that no one can truly win in the arena, that she is just a pawn in a game so much larger than herself, and all of her training meant nothing: She would likely die anyway. The despair, the terror, the betrayal, the powerlessness - it shattered her.

To see a victor go from being a calculated killer to a mere shadow of her former self would do more than drive home Annie's role as the personification of trauma and its consequences: It would make the sheer barbarity and inhumanity of the Games all the more apparent.

Misconceptions about the 70th Hunger Games:

Admittedly, not very much is known about the 70th Games, but we do have enough information to put together a very, very vague timeline of events. At some point during her Games, Annie witnessed her district partner getting beheaded, an event that was (understandably) extremely traumatising. This led Annie to isolate herself for the rest of the Games, a strategy that we can assume worked reasonably well... until an earthquake caused a dam to break and flooded the arena. Being from District 4, Annie was an exceptionally strong swimmer. In the words of The Hunger Games: Tribute Guide, citizens of District 4 "can swim like fish themselves." This would ultimately lead Annie to be crowned as victor of the 70th Hunger Games, as she was able to save herself while the remaining tributes drowned.

A common argument against the idea that Annie could be a Career is that all she did was hide for the majority of the Games until the earthquake hit. However, I believe this to be based on a misunderstanding of the events outlined above. Once again, there is very limited information available about Annie's Games. That being said, whilst we know that at some point in the Games Annie isolated herself, we do not know when this was. It is entirely possible that Annie was an active member of the Career pack for a period of time, even if it was only for a few days. Only when her district partner was killed did she go into hiding - and, again, we have no indication of when that was. For all we know, that could've happened a few days before the earthquake broke the dam and flooded the arena, meaning Annie would've been part of the Career pack for the majority of the Games; perhaps it happened only a few days into the Games. The point is (like so much else about Annie) we do not know.

I will concede that because of the lack of information about the 70th Hunger Games, it is of course possible that Annie had no involvement with the Career pack, did not come into conflict with any other tributes, and won purely because she was a strong swimmer. However, based on everything I discussed in the previous section (Annie being from a Career district, reaped at the age Careers tend to volunteer, the purpose of her character as a symbol of trauma, emphasising the barbarity of the Games, etc.) I think it makes far more sense for Annie to have been a member of the Career pack. Ultimately, there is no solid reason, no hard evidence in canon, to suggest that Annie was not a Career tribute. If anything, the details we are aware of all seem to support the idea of her being one.

Finnick Odair — a volunteer, or simply out of luck?

As a quick side note: I do acknowledge that most of the points I have raised are largely based on assumptions. Assumptions supported by canon, but assumptions nonetheless. Having said that, there is one final topic to be explored in the case for Annie being a Career - and that is Finnick Odair.

A simple comparison between Annie and Finnick highlights Annie as the far more likely Career tribute of the pair. Indeed, there is arguably more evidence (however tenuous) to suggest that Annie was a Career than Finnick was. I am hardly the first person to point this out, but I do think it is worth mentioning and is quite interesting to consider.

The two main points of this discussion are 1) the age of the tributes and 2) Finnick's weapon of choice.

Firstly, we know that Annie was 18 when she was reaped for the Games and that Finnick was 14. Given that District 4 is a Career district, it doesn't really make sense for Finnick to have volunteered as at this age since he would be at a significant disadvantage. One of the first things we learn about Finnick is that he was the youngest victor, meaning that before the 65th Games nobody his age had survived the arena. Entering the Games as a 14 year old was just as much a death sentence as entering it at 12 or 13. There is of course the possibility that another 14 year old had won before and Finnick was simply younger by a few months; but even so, we can assume that it was a rare occurrence for anyone under the age of 15 to survive.

Why would a 14 year old boy, who (if he'd even been training in the first place) likely had not completed his training, volunteer for the Games? Why would he volunteer at an age when he was so unlikely to win, especially when Career tributes are known to volunteer at 18, meaning he would be so much younger than his fiercest, most lethal competitors? Why not wait until he was 18 and had the best chances of winning he could hope for? With this in mind, it seems far more likely that Finnick was just another kid who was unlucky enough to have the entry slip with his name on it selected.

What makes less sense is why, in a Career district, no one would have volunteered in his place. I've seen so many possible theories for this, some going with the idea that Finnick was a volunteer and either had very little training (with there being some other motivator for why he volunteered) or had received a good amount of training and was, for one reason or another, chosen to be D4's male tribute for that year. Others follow the theory that Finnick was not a Career, and it was merely a string of unfortunate events that led to nobody volunteering to take his place - for example, there being some sort of tragedy that left District 4 without any Careers-in-training. Once again (take a shot every time I say this lmfao) we do not know the specific circumstances surrounding the reaping for the 65th Hunger Games. However, based on what we can piece together, it makes far less sense, given his age, for Finnick to have been a Career. On the contrary, Annie's age at the time of her Games makes for a much more convincing argument in favour of her being a Career.

As for Finnick's weapon, it has frequently been pointed out that a trident is a strange weapon for a Career to be adept at using. Why would Finnick's training dedicate so much time to becoming skilled with a weapon that is so unlikely to be available at the Cornucopia? Instead, perhaps Finnick simply knew how to use the trident because he was a spear-fisher's son from the district that specialises in fishing.

Moreover, we are told that Finnick was adept at using spears and knives. These are weapons you would expect a Career to have been trained to use, but since District 4's industry is fishing it is entirely possible that Finnick knew how to use these tools simply because he had often worked with them before.

I do think this point about Finnick's weapon is a slightly weaker argument than the one concerning his age. Finnick may have been taught to wield spears and knives during his training as a Career, with it still being possible that he knew how to use the trident due to D4's major industry being fishing - a trade he almost certainly was familiar with, even if only slightly. In the case against Finnick being a Career, I would argue that his age at the time of the 65th Hunger Games is the most compelling point. Of course, there is no reason why Annie and Finnick couldn't have both been Careers. The reason for this comparison is simply to highlight that there is as much evidence to suggest that Annie was a Career as there is to suggest Finnick was. And in some ways, Finnick being a Career raises more questions and doubts than Annie being one does.

TL;DR:

Annie Cresta should not be overlooked just because she does not fit the stereotype of a 'strong' character. If anything, her instability due to the Games is all the more reason to suggest she was a Career. The point of her character is to show how the Games (or traumatic experiences in general) affect those who endure them, so Annie must have left the arena as a completely different person to who she was when she entered it. Most of what we know in canon seems to indicate that she was a Career; in fact, there is potentially a stronger case to be made for Annie being a Career than Finnick. Since we know so little of Annie Cresta much is left up to the interpretation of the reader, but this does not negate the fact it makes more sense for Annie to have been a Career based on the details we do have.

[motherphoebe]

on the last chapter of my catching fire reread and already feel the post reading the trilogy ever depression even tho i literally still have mockingjay

#catching fire #mockingjay #the hunger games

[motherphoebe]

Finnick's real charms of self-effacing humor and an easygoing nature are on display for the first time. He never lets go of Annie's hand. Not when they walk, not when they eat. I doubt he ever plans to. She's lost in some daze of happiness. There are still moments when you can tell something slips in her brain and another world blinds her to us. But a few words from Finnick call her back.

[motherphoebe]

this line has never made me want to cry until right now what even????

[motherphoebe]

listening to good form by nicki minaj while writing an emotional annie moment

#annie cresta #odesta #thg fanfiction #spotify shuffle is actually insane i was listening to Hozier

[motherphoebe]

i’m probably so late but i’ve been listening to the Catching Fire audio book at work, and at the end of chapter 22 when Katniss on watch and soothing Wiress to sleep and has the discovery the arena is a clock she says: “tick tock, this is a clock”

when i tell you i IMMEDIATELY thought of miss dr Volumina Gaul and her hippity hoppity rhyming insanity

#catching fire #the hunger games #tbosas #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #dr gaul #katniss everdeen #wiress

[motherphoebe]

why did i actually sob and cry at the wicket trailer

#ariana grande #wicked #ive literally been waiting for this since she was casted

[motherphoebe]

somehow at 6.6k words and proof reading/editing. i’m going to try to get the second chapter out this weekend, it’s extremely plot heavy, i honestly think chapter 1 is more of a prologue then the first chapter

honestly tho i’m loving the way this chapters going im so excited everyone thank my brain for being so productive and lets hope she continues 🤞🏼🤞🏼

2.7k words into chapter two of The Parting Glass my brain is working at full speed thank u fan fiction gods

[motherphoebe]

that’s her oomf 😭😭

[motherphoebe]

2.7k words into chapter two of The Parting Glass my brain is working at full speed thank u fan fiction gods

#thg fanfiction #annie cresta #finnick odair #odesta

[motherphoebe]

i just posted the first chapter!! idk how i feel about it but i was getting so over critical that i just posted it before i could even continue editing it, and im currently working on the next few chapters! i posted it here and ao3, go check it out :)

i’ve been considering (constantly plagued by the thought and unable to think of anything else) writing an Annie Cresta fan fiction about her games, and possibly having it continue throughout the rest of mockingjay. i just cannot shake the idea of Annie Cresta being a career tribute!!!! like the emotional journey of not only her games but her life after with Finnick?? would be sooo absolutely amazing to write?? why am i so excited??? would anyone read?

[motherphoebe]

The Parting Glass

Annie Cresta's time as a career tribute in the 70th Hunger Games. Canon compliant, as of right now this fic will be mostly head cannon as we know so little until the original trilogy. I wanted to add so much more to this, but I dont think I would've ever posted if I kept editing it lmao. I also posted this on my ao3 account, same username as here! enjoy and please leave feedback ngl i need to be hyped up!

Chapter 1:

next chapter

The first thing I do is throw the quilt off of my legs.

The open window does little to aid in cooling down the room, the relentless summer heat did not cool throughout the night and now the opened curtains also let in the blinding morning sun. It takes a moment to get past my drowsiness, but eventually I reluctantly move my sweaty body from the small bed, hanging my legs off the side and holding my head in my hands.

I wish the sweltering heat were the reason for my restless night. Today is reaping day, and the salty air somehow doesn’t feel as peaceful as usual and does little to calm my nerves. My chest tightens and I quickly try to calm myself. I reach for my tying rope and think about last night, my time at the beach, swimming with a large group of friends, the peaceful waves, the moon, and surprisingly I find my breathing subtly calm. I wish today weren't reaping day, I wish they’d cancel the games all together, I wish a lot of things. I tie and untie my rope, and slowly accept that wishing won’t change the events of today and what is expected of me as an eighteen year old living in Panem.

Every year, the Capitol hosts a Hunger Games, and the first step is a reaping ceremony in which each of the 12 districts have to produce a male and female tribute. It’s to keep us scared and unwilling of rebellion, the fate of children 12 to 18, in the hands of the Capitol to be escorted into an arena to fight to the death. My thoughts are interrupted when I hear my older siblings greeting my parents in the other room, and suddenly my sisters bursting into the bedroom we used to share.

“Annie!” I take in her ecstatic demeanor and can't help but smile. I gasp and make a teasingly shocked face, while examining the gifts she came bearing: A new dress, and cherries.

“Muriel, you’re planning on sharing those right?”

My mouth waters at the sight of the cherries, and I wonder how she was able to afford them, along with the dress. It’s not like we have a surplus of money, and cherries are usually outrageously expensive when sold at the market. Her and I, and our older brother, Skipper, picked up jobs as soon as we could to help our parents, but now that she’s married, maybe she can afford such luxuries. Muriel makes beautiful tapestries using the flowers and plants that line the shores, and they've always seemed to sell quite well at the market, along with her handmade jewelry. My brother, Skipper, started repairing boats with my father once they were back from their shifts out at sea. The pair's services are relatively cheap and extremely effective, the people of 4 with boats need them functioning to be able to live so there’s always business.

Muriel exaggerates the shaking of her head, acting like she’s keeping the gifts to herself, then instantly breaks character, smiling and handing the fruit to me, carefully hanging the light blue dress off the chair. I can see the worry she’s trying to hide in her eyes.

“And is this dress new? Muriel these gifts are so nice they must have cost you a fortune, please let me pay you back-”

“I got them for you.” She cuts me off, putting my head in her hands “Plus, you wouldn’t be able to pay me back anyway.”

She’s joking but she’s not wrong; while she and Skipper found real jobs, I found peacefulness, and a very small income compared to the two of them. I started helping our neighbor, Mrs. Ahearn, by teaching some of her swimming lessons. It doesn’t pay well and I probably couldn’t save enough to buy even some grain at the market after a month of work, but there’s something about teaching the younger children of my district that makes it worth it. Still so innocent, too young to be put into the training academy, their parents still shielding their eyes when the games are playing, the worst things that could happen to them so far away. Plus, it’s a great way to meet the people in town, most of the kids are the younger siblings of friends i’ve known for years, and honestly, it’s better than being at home. The house feels empty now that both my siblings have left.

Muriel moves her hands and pulls me into a hug, our heads resting on each other's shoulders. “You still being in the reaping makes me feel worse than when I was. I know you’ll be fine Annie, but the sooner we’re all done with this the better. Better for mom and dad too, you know it scares them to death. Can I help you get ready?”

I nod my head in agreement, and soon my mouth is full of cherry pits. The reaping scares all of us, my father says that’s the point and it’s been obvious to me that our parents have had enough stress from the reapings in their lives. The second Skipper was ten, he was the first of us to enter the training academy after school, and once we were all old enough to be reaped, it seemed everything tied back to being a lesson on how we could win the Hunger Games, fishing, strength, knowledge. After surviving his own childhood possibility of being reaped, putting us in the training academy was my fathers small way of finding comfort in the uncontrollable, it gave him the peace of mind many other parents found refuge in; that if the odds hadn’t been in their families favor, their child could at least have a chance.

Muriel starts with my hair, stating something about my ‘messy cherry hands’ staining the pastel blue of the linen dress, and to keep them far away. Her hands are calloused, reflecting those of someone who’s worked a majority of their life, weaving and unweaving nets, creating her tapestries and intricate jewelry. She’s so precise in the way she does my hair, something I'm so grateful for. Choosing specific strands, tying them under or over, I’ve never been able to replicate these styles for her though, no matter how hard I try.

The thought of being reaped is horrifying, but there’s no comfort in the children I’ve known forever being reaped instead, it sends a shudder down my spine, and I feel the panic slowly seeping into my chest. The most recent victor we’ve had in District 4 is Finnick Odair. Although he’s a year older than me and a grade above, I remember him fondly from our short time together in the academy, but even more strongly I remember my fear when he was reaped at fourteen. His capability of winning so young makes me feel weak, and honestly dumb for being so horrified at age eighteen. It seemed all everyone was obsessing over during his games were his looks, but all I could think about was how kind he’d been to me, and how quickly he’d turned into a killer to survive. Somehow I found comfort in that thought. If he’d gone through only four years of the training I’ve had and won, I should be confident in my skills after eight.

I hadn’t realized my foot was tapping aggressively until Muriel placed her hand on my knee and I immediately stopped while she leaned her head down to my face.

“It’s okay to be nervous, Annie, I’m nervous too, probably safe to say all the Cresta’s are nervous. But, we will all be fine tonight, for our celebratory dinner and beach swim, right?” She has tears building in her eyes, “You’ll have to be fine Annie, this is your last year! Only one more and we will all be okay.”

The tears begin to roll down her cheeks in small lines that rush over her blushed face, while she tries to convince both of us.

Muriel has always been free to be overtly emotional, her strength is not relied on to keep others strong. If I ever cried or showed my weakness like this to any of my family, i’m afraid it would shatter them into a million little pieces— Annie Cresta, the baby of the family, so scared and so weak and completely unsaveable by any of them— so I put on a strong face, and push back the tears.

“You know i’ll be just fine Muriel, my name is only in there seven times. The odds have been in our favor the past ten years since Skippers first reaping, I have no doubt of our family's luck.”

I can’t help but wipe my cherry stained hands on my old sleeping shirt I’m sure was hers before reaching up and wiping her tears, just before pulling her into a tight hug. I take whatever doubt I have in my own statement and shove it deep within me, refusing to let my worries get to me, especially now.

My words slightly comfort Muriel, but when my mother walks in, a whole new feeling of serenity washes over us, whether it's forced or not.

“Hello, oh! My sweet Poppy!” she enters the room with a weary face, and once seeing her two daughters in a sorrowful hug, she rushes over to press a gentle kiss to my cheek. My mother and Muriel are so similar, not just in their looks, with beautiful big brown eyes and dark blonde hair, but in attitude as well. Of course, my mother and sister are strong, our whole family is strong, but they are not afraid to let their softer sides show. Whether it’s Muriel’s tears or my mother’s tender affection, it works for them, it makes them stronger to be so emotionally available, but it doesn’t seem to come as easily to the rest of us. While Skipper seems to be a somewhat perfect mix of my mother and father in looks and personality, I look into the mirror now and see my father in every way. Dark brown some what curly hair, sea foam green eyes and tan skin, the need to be strong for the people around us.

“You look beautiful, as always.” She says simply, bringing her palm to her own face to stub her tears. She walks around to the back of my head where Muriel’s progress with my hair had come to a brief pause. She turns me towards the dirty mirror, and I can see the beautiful intricate half braid my sister has done on the top layers of my hair, leaving the rest long and freely curling naturally. Muriel adds a starfish and pearl necklace she made for me years ago on my 12th birthday, and my mother adds a beautiful poppy orange bow that stands out beautifully in my dark brown hair. “It reminded me of you, Ula’s mother was selling them yesterday. It’s almost time to leave, make sure you’re dressed soon.”

She places another soft kiss on the top of my head and then leaves the room. She has called me her Poppy for as long as I can remember, saying I'm just as bright as the beautiful orange flower that grows all over District 4. Muriel follows her out, adjusting the necklace around my neck, “It gets worse each year, but I believe in you, Annie.” I want to comfort her, tell her I’ll be fine, but I can’t trust the stability in voice to make it convincing. Instead I acknowledge her sentiment by simply nodding.

As we walk to the ceremony, I try to stay present in my family's conversation, but my mind keeps drifting away. Every child I see my age has a target on their back, even myself, and none of us know who will be hit. I don’t let this show in my face, keeping a steady smile and waving to my fellow peers, who I've grown so close to. The reaping ceremony is already awful, but when you’re so acquainted in such a tightly knit community, there is no getting out unscathed, It’s always someone I know.

Once we arrive at the square in front of the justice building, my chest tightens and I’m forced now to strictly focus on my breathing. Being the only one in the family eligible to be reaped, I’m forced to part from as they continue towards the viewing area. Our separation is short and sweet, just a simple discussion of where we will meet once the ceremony concludes. I search almost desperately for someone to stand with while waiting to check in. Of course there’s a surplus of children my age, most I know quite well, but I’m not sure who to start a conversation with. I see Ula and decide her normally timid personality would be perfect.

We shuffle into the eighteen year old group, and quickly get pushed through the line to the standing area right before the stage. I thank her for the bow even though her mother made it, and that’s about all we say to each other. Even though I’m surrounded by friends from school or the training academy, I refrain from saying much more. There's not much to say, in a perfect world it would be none of us, maybe the games would be canceled, but the worlds not perfect and “hope it's you not me” isn't really the most comforting sentiment.

The mayor takes the stage, starting with his usual speech and directing us to watch the screens positioned above us, and I prepare myself to doze off. I know nothing important happens until the escort, Prisca Luminara, takes the stage, then I’ll be forced to pay attention, but for now I can stare at the screens and pretend to watch. The usual video plays about the Dark Days, a time of war and rebellion, and why we must participate in the Hunger Games. It’s not until I see Prisca walk up to the microphone, her silver tied up hair immediately catching my attention, that I tune in. First she introduces District 4’s previous victors , we actually have quite a few, but there’s been no one new since Finnick Odair won 5 years ago.

I find myself looking at Finnick, the way the sun reflects off his bronze hair, and realize the girls at school aren’t wrong, he’s beautiful. Honestly I’d never realized, the last conversations we had were so friendly. Both of us were so young, joking about mermaids and seaweed, I’ve preferred thinking of him that way since, not as the man he’s supposedly become.

I accidentally think about him for far too long, and don't fully tune in until Prisca announces that it’s time to pick the tributes.

“As always, ladies first! Remember, volunteering must wait until both tributes have been reaped!”

Her posh accent ringing through my ears while she steps towards the glass ball holding the female tribute's names. Six of those slips hold the name ‘Annie Cresta’, carefully folded and thrown in with the rest. Prisca pulls the tributes name and I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding. I follow the actions of my peers as they slowly make a circle, it must have been someone from my age group.

“Annie Cresta! Don’t be shy, dear come up!”

Suddenly I realize what’s going on, I gather myself the best I can and somehow begin walking down the main aisle towards the stage. It takes all my strength to keep my head up, a kind smile holding my face together to hide my absolute shock. Eventually I reach the stage, smiling to Prisca as she takes my hand to lead me to my place, I even tell her thanks. The humid heat is even more unbearable up here, and I do everything in my power to avoid the faces of my peers below me, knowing how easily it could break this smile and fall into a puddle of tears.

“Perfect! Now for the boys!” Her heels are louder now that I'm onstage, and I can see her jewel encrusted nails searching in the bowl for the next tribute.

“Bodie Cormoran”

Now it seriously takes everything in me to not collapse to the floor. When I hear his name, avoiding eye contact with the crowd is not my biggest worry; I know him, I know him far too well. I immediately see the eighteen year old boy's fluffy auburn hair, making his way to the stage. His usual tall and stocky build seems only half as sturdy as it normally is, although the small defeat in his shoulders is probably only noticeable to those who know him closely. Soon, he’s being led by Prisca to the spot next to me as she chatters about her excitement. As soon as I make eye contact with him, I give him a reassuring look. I receive one in return, a small smile and nod, but his eyes show me how horrified he is. It’s because we will be going in together, if one of us lives, it ensures the other one’s death.

“Now do we have any volunteers? Remember folks, you cannot volunteer for someone who has already volunteered!”

She seems to be expecting a lot more action, but the time to volunteer comes and goes, and the only sound that fills the square is the waves from the far off sea. I hide my disappointment behind my small smile while staring forward towards the cameras. I need to play this exactly the way I’ve been trained, and for now I have to seem relentlessly strong, a true career tribute from District 4.

But when they ask for the tributes to shake hands, I can’t help but hug Bodie instead.

#annie cresta #finnick odair #the hunger games #thg #thg finnick #finnick #the parting glass #the 70th hunger games #odesta #finnick x annie #district 4 #mags flanagan #fan fiction #thg fanfiction

[motherphoebe]

The best quality a fictional man can have is being deeply, pathetically, wretchedly in love with someone, I think

[motherphoebe]

the way these actually make me giggle and kick my feet as if they're real tweets from ppl i know

more hunger games tweets let’s get silly!!!!!

[motherphoebe]

i have been writing the Annie Cresta as a career fan fiction!!!

i’m going to be so honest i’m being so hyper critical of my own writing that it’s taking me forever, sometimes i hate it and then sometimes i love it, but right now i’m pretty sure im happy with where it’s going!! BUT! i have no fucking clue how tumblr works, ngl the last time i was here was middle school and it was a lot different! i’m planning on posting on ao3 as well but if anyone has any suggestions pls comment! (or dm me if that’s a thing idk)

#annie cresta #thg #the hunger games #odesta #finnick odair #the hunger games finnick #finnick x annie #thg fanfiction