notvinxent

[notvinxent]

Sims Journal #02

It’s crazy how accurate my sim self is to me. I put her in a house with my friends’ sims and all she does most of the time was be cooped up in her room playing video games, watch tv, and the only time she goes out of her room was to eat and work out. She happens to be friends with only the household cat and doesn’t bother to socialize with her roommates :’) I had to force her to talk to two of her roommates so she have someone in the house to talk to.

I was considering making a whole separate game file just playing as me and making my ideal life. Then it occurred to me that it would probably be boring cause my ideal life revolves around no drama or chaos. And the fact I don’t want to see myself grow old or have kids. Even tho my sim self did have a son… but that was a whole different game file or an “alternate universe” I would say.

Should I just bring my son into the world but have him live his own life? I’m just gonna make him as a young adult as well. He will be going about his life while the mother he doesn’t know about, deals with constant chaos among her roommates. I don’t know what I would do with him but I will think of something 🤔 Im thinking about giving him a little “refresh” cause it’s been 2 years since I played him.

#sims journal

[notvinxent]

Journal Entry: May 9th 2024 @ 2:50 AM EST

I’m kind of stressed and nervous right now. Cause I don’t have the best results when it comes to hair appointments. I had been trying to get the wolfcut or the same hairstyle my sim self is rocking… cause I know it looks good on me but I keep getting different results. When it comes to people cutting your hair, it can make or break your self esteem.

I know me being nervous is a bit too much but I just don’t want the hairstylist to fuck it up. I will try to communicate with my hair stylist better than in the past with other hair stylists. Cause of my mild social anxiety and not showing enough reference photos to properly communicate what I want for my hair… that could be my main factor to my problem.

I had prepared enough reference photos and even some tiktoks of this girl with similar hair type but with the hair style i prefer to get close to the results I want. I guess with some not good attempts in the past- I’m terrified of hair appointments now

UPDATE: So they managed to get close to the reference picture of when it's not styled. Which is a relief :') Now I have to figure out how to style it.

#journal entries

[notvinxent]

Sketchy Hangout Scene

I decided to make this room in game so later on I can render it all in blender afterwards for an upcoming little video I will be working on soon ^^

It was pretty fun making a dingey ghetto type of room ngl

#sims content

[notvinxent]

Self Photoshoot w/ TV concept

I was struggling with finding 3d model of TV's online that would actually appear normal for couple hours on this... but regardless I still like how the pics turned out^^ This is my definite sign to not be lazy and practice on 3d modeling to make my own props lmaooo

#sims content

[notvinxent]

Journal Entry: May 5th 2024 @ 00:17 EST

I realized I have ranted a lot more than I should on here. Let’s balance it out with something a bit more…. Positive :)

So I had been struggling with balancing doing things for myself while spending time with friends for awhile. And for a whole year I’ve been learning to focus more on myself as I realized I needed to start making boundaries on my personal time.

Before I had my boundaries crossed and some of my friends took it personally when I want time for myself. I didn’t know how to say no to hanging out with them when I don’t feel like it. So I ended up disappearing as a result- Of course some of my friends were concerned and we talked it out eventually later on and respecting my time and decision to when I’m actually free to hang out.

I’m starting to slowly going back to hanging out with my friends again, only when I truly feel like I’m free. Although I am hanging out with other friends that actually understand I’m not free all the time… I caught myself needing to hang out at every opportunity cause I feel I would be a bad friend cause of a habit. I’m taking baby steps at a time to have time for myself at least for a few hours.

#journal entries

[notvinxent]

Introductions~

Name: Vinxent, Vinnie, Vin

Age: 23 yr

Astrology: Taurus sun, Gemini Rising, and Leo Moon

MBTI: INFP

Interests/Hobbies: The Sims, Genshin Impact, Drawing, Binge watch on Anime/Kdramas, Collecting Smiskis, Fashion, KR&B, Korean Indie Rock

More on me: Hey y'all ^^ I made this tumblr account so I can spam post as much as I want to without the pressure social media would typically impose and I don't want my friends/family to know about this account^ I wanted to post both sims content for myself and document a personal journal entries here. Whether or not I have followers on here, I would post on here for myself regardless.

I know what you maybe thinking: isn't better to get a journal instead so it's more private?

a: Tbh, yes that is true! I actually have one and don't worry I don't post anything too personal on here. I only wanted to have a digital journal entry laying around somewhere on the internet and that someday in many years from now... I would do a simple google search and look back at how I write back then. I always wanted to see the character development throughout the years.

Plus... at least I won't lose this tumblr blog unlike a physical journal ;)

#about me

[notvinxent]

“Human (2024)”

Directed and written by yours truly 💕

Update: idk how this post is labeled as mature when the video seems pretty pg13 or more tamer than that 💀

#sims 4 #sims machinima #sims #ts4 #ts4 simblr #sims content

[notvinxent]

Journal Entry: May 2nd 2024 at 12:16 PM

So I had a dream that I was stressed out from finals in school, even though I already got finals over with and ended up passing with A’s. I was walking out my classes and picked up my phone to call my mom to pick me up since she’s my ride home. Instead, I heard a voice that is not my mom. It’s actually this old friend I had to cut off.

She answered the phone not in an angry or upset tone, rather in her usual tone like it’s a regular Tuesday. She sounded like I did not cut contact with her at all. She was talking normally. She didn’t demand an explanation or anything. That left me confused and probably scared. I didn’t know how to end the call without being a dick. Fortunately my dream ended with my phone going off cause my friend start calling me to complain about work.

It seems like from the dream, I guess I was feeling guilty cutting her off along with regarding the ties of our friendship had been going on for 4 years, making it feels even more wrong to cut her off. And I guess I sort of longed for things to be resolved for us, but considering her behavior… it’s not gonna be possible. When in reality I need to understand that what I did was best for my own boundaries, as she already crossed them many times without my knowledge.

I had been trying to go on Sky more ever since the cut off. But I don’t know if I should continue on playing. Playing this game reminds me too much of her. That was my initial purpose of playing Sky, just to get close to her. I would do anything for her but she definitely won’t feel the same… and that’s what hurts the most.

Honestly I thought I’m taking this friendship breakup well, but clearly my dream says otherwise. When it comes to friends, I always put my heart on my sleeve for them. 💔

#journal enteries

[notvinxent]

Sim Diaries || Post #01

I love how I’m currently stressing out over my professor giving us an unrealistic final exam to do while haven’t given back our grades yet- basically typical academic stress of a college student… meanwhile my sim self just don’t got the care in the world and sleeping peacefully 🥹

#sims journal

[notvinxent]

Journal entry: April 27th 2024 at 10:59 EST

I’m destressed from dealing with two final projects that happened to be due last night. I still have the take home exam to deal with. But regardless of that, I felt like more of myself again now I got back enough sleep.

I’m just wondering to myself if this friendship breakup was even necessary. After all, I did have to deal with this whole worrying about finals. And if there’s anything I learned the hard way:

“Life doesn’t pause for you when it comes to work or school.”

Like think about it, why are kids and teens more susceptible to drama in their lives than adults? Cause we are too busy and tired to be put up with it. Maybe I just don’t have the patience like I used to, to effectively fix this with her.

This is my first or second time having to deal with a friendship breakup on my own since I often put myself in the position of being in good terms with people until we naturally fall off or they cut themselves out of my life. And that’s on being a chronic people pleaser.

I had to remind myself for the last few days that it’s them that are in the wrong as they lack accountability and don’t value friendship the same way a normal person would. It’s like how last year, I nearly got SH’d while being drunk all because I am too scared to cut this person out of my life cause I don’t know how to. Confrontation really scares me.

I am just afraid of the unknown aftermath that comes with it. I’m still in the same large public discord server with her. Should I leave so I won’t run into her? What if she makes me look bad in the server so I will be unable to make friends? After all, I’m only in that server cause it’s a Sky public server where we help each other out on “Sky Children of Light”. But then again, she rarely talked in there and there’s like thousands of active users on there. It should be fine, right? Glad this friend isn’t an irl friend or I had to actively avoid them.

#journal entries

[notvinxent]

Updates on “Human (2024)”

So I had been working and playing with the unused footages during my spare free time when I want to take a breather from finals and what had been going on recently with a certain someone. I already came up with the name and new concept for it! Finals is coming to an end and I cannot wait to finish this little sim video I made ^^ it’s currently in WIP

EDIT: Choice of photos from the video is to capture my mood rn from how hectic life has been

#sims content

[notvinxent]

Journal Entry: April 25th, 2024 at 03:26 EST

I wasn’t taken it well when I had to cut off a friend that I realized didn’t provide any value in the relationship nor the friend group. Cause I hate to be the one to cut people off as I felt like I would be the bad guy. I had to be on voice chat with a close friend of mine to vent and help sort my feeling through.

I guess due to how small my friend group is, I would be more easy going to have them as a friend… ignoring their red flags. Of course, this doesn’t apply to all my friends as there has been a few bad apples been picked.

Hopefully in the future, I grow and learn from this as a lesson if I ever find myself in this similar case again. Like being aware of types of people to look out for. Anyways back to my final projects.

#journal entries

[notvinxent]

Journal Entry: April 24th, 2024 at 21:12 EST

To someone who will never get to read this so I can get it off my chest,

I’m sorry it had to go down like this but you left me with no choice. I tried my best to communicate with you as you got me worried about your well-being for the past 3 months, but instead of properly talking it out with me- you decide to not properly give me an explanation on your being and instigate an argument afterwards.

It left me confused and upset that I had to take a step back and realized I never got a apology in return for making me worried for your well-being as a friend nor a thank you for checking up on you. Not that you are obligated to do these things but sometimes I feel like me being a good friend isn’t satisfied enough for you. And it didn’t go down like this just because of this incident.

Now, I maybe a bad guy in your book… but I hope you take some time to self reflect what you have done. Because being trapped in this victim mentality can distort what’s really in front of you. And I hope one day, you will snap out of it for your own good. It really be yourself, preventing yourself to be happier and live peacefully.

Wise words I still live by and it’s relevant: “Just because your pain is understandable, doesn’t mean your behavior is acceptable.”

Hoping all the best for you, yours truly Vi(nnie)🖤

#journal entries

[notvinxent]

Journal Entry: April 24th, 2024 at 16:40 EST

As I am continuing on my final projects for the semester. I can’t help but feel overwhelmed as I work. It’s ideal to stop and take a breather but I have little time to get it done. Why must I feel this way now? I wanted this week to be over, so I can bed rot without any stress.

#journal entries

[notvinxent]

Bad Girl by Usher Dance Cover (2023)

Sim: Dal-gun Lee

Animation: ConceptDesign97

This video was my first time rendering animations on blender to make higher quality sim videos ^^ Hopefully I will be making more blender videos in the future when I have the chance :D

#sims content

[notvinxent]

I was looking through my camera roll and I found bunch of footages of this sim that had been waiting 2 years for me to edit them. Sadly I forgot what concept I was going for, when filming them. But I’m sure with a refreshed mind, I will come up with something different to make use of them :)

[notvinxent]

Late Night Photoshoot Montage (2022)

Sim: Me (but in male version)

#sims 4 #simblr #ts4 #sims content