shitnpiss - Tumblr blog

shitnpiss · 29 days

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I've been thinking for a while and… I'm starting to think the antis are right… Stancest is gross and doesn't make any sense.

Like, yeah they're weird old men but if you were to ask either Stan if he liked the other in that way, they'd both scoff and yell "That's disgusting, he's my BROTHER!!! I only cuddle with him and french-kiss him PLATONICALLY!!!"

It's so gross. Stan would probably start crying from someone suggesting such heinous things about how he loves his brother that he cares about so much. Ford would then try to calm him down by kissing him on the cheek then slowly moving over to nibble on his ear (PLATONICALLY). They then start making out in a brotherly display of affection.

Once their lips break apart, they catch their breaths and look into each other's eyes... then at you. After a brief moment of their brotherly love radiating around you, Stan breaks the silence to say "April Fools, kid." Ford nods and follows with "I do fuck my brother."

You would probably respond with something along the lines of "Oh that makes sense. Thank you for the clarification."

Ford replies "No problem.

Stanford Pines, Ph.D, Ph.D, Ph.D, Ph.D, Ph.D, Ph.D, Ph.D, Ph.D, Ph.D, Ph.D, Ph.D, Ph.D

Professor, Department of Anomalies"

As Stan and Ford hold hands and board the Stan O War II, you walk away, realizing that you just wasted 3 minutes of your life reading a haphazardly written April Fools post about two old men being gay for each other and also twin brothers.

#stancest #april fools

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shitnpiss · 1 month

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The implications of this would be so much worse than better, but I can't help but imagine if there was a reverse blocked list. If I could see a list of all the people who have me blocked. I'm curious I wanna know who saw me shitting and pissing and was like "ummm no thanks." I dont even have anything against them for it (if anything I encourage people to block me for the sake of their comfort) but I'm still curious hfkwyqgbzhfv

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shitnpiss · 2 months

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#ouugh #their titties....#stancest #suggestive #nsft #?#no parts showing but yeah

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shitnpiss · 2 months

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#AND HOW DID I NEVER SEE THIS???#also amazing!!!#stan's flirting... (woozy emoji)#stancest #teen stans

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shitnpiss · 2 months

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Happy (belated) Valentine

I know this is late af, but I got it done! So let's pretend I posted it last week, lol. But here's my Valentine's piece of the grunkles, Silver Fox Ford 🦊💖 and Dream Captain Stan ⛵💖

#how do i keep forgetting to reblog this???#anomaly back with amazing art!!!#the detail! the smoke hearts from stan's cigar!#these are old gays if ive ever seen them #stancest #stancest valentine 2024 #valentines day

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shitnpiss · 3 months

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Everyone loves toxic yaoi (psychological manipulation, torture, etc.) but draws the line at twin brothers fucking each other

#shipcest

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shitnpiss · 3 months

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Old Mullets (+Stancest)

#stancest #a classic #(s)#stan pines #30s stans #mostly #STAN IN THE 3RD PICTURE IS SO CUTE #HE'S SO HAPPY TO SEE FORD

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shitnpiss · 3 months

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ASS

Nobody loves me but that’s okay 💔

#stan pines #suggestive

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shitnpiss · 3 months

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IT IS DONE! Erg, finally. I swear shading backgrounds/background in general, its is a time-devouring monster!

My favorite part about this is how the Author is horrified cause he has to work with that guy and Stan could care less since…while since it’s Stan.

#stancest #a classic #30s stans #oh my gosh Stanford and the author!!!!1

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shitnpiss · 3 months

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fic - “have a little faith in me”

for @who-knows-after-dark, the other half of my grunkle feels echo chamber

she mentioned ford wearing a blindfold and I GOT EXTREMELY CARRIED AWAY WITH IDEA

title borrowed from this song

- - -

Ford becomes a different person with the blindfold on.

It happens before Stan is even finished tying on the bandana. As soon as his eyes are covered Ford’s rigid shoulders sag with relief, his breath shuddering out of him in a long, slow sigh. When Stan’s done with the knot he lets a hand linger on Ford’s face; Ford nuzzles into it, his stubble scraping the lifeline carved across the palm.

“Stanley,” he murmurs, hushed and delicate, just like he used to do when the lights were out and they were supposed to be asleep.

“Right here, Sixer,” Stan murmurs back, rubbing his thumb against Ford’s cheek. “I ain’t going anywhere.”

Ford makes a soft sound in the back of his throat, his head bowed in gratitude. Stan just slides his grip down to Ford’s chin so he can lift it and guide him into a kiss. They’re both sitting sidesaddle on the edge of the mattress, one foot on the floor and the other leg tucked up on the bed so they can face each other. Ford reaches out in response, his hands uncertainly feeling their way through the air until he finds Stan’s thighs and takes hold, anchoring himself as he leans into the kiss, his mouth hungry and wanting.

Funny, but Stan never would have guessed that Ford might be into this whole blindfold thing. He’s usually so alert, so aware, always staring at Stan like he doesn’t want to miss a single critical cue as to what he should be doing next. It was definitely a surprise when he asked if they could try something like this— but as soon as he heard that long, slow sigh, Stan only wished that Ford had asked him sooner.

Keep reading

#!!!#a classic #stancest #blindfold #nsft #suggestive #fic

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shitnpiss · 3 months

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god ford pines is so hot

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shitnpiss · 4 months

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Okay 1. This is cute and fluffy and hot and I love it,

2. @dejabooooo