sometimes-its-family

[sometimes-its-family]

Community PSA

[ This is only part of the full PSA (including evidence) which you can find here ]

Content Warnings

Grooming, Victim blaming, Harassment, Sexual abuse, Suicide / Self-harm mention, Emotional / Mental abuse mention

Introduction

Some of you may know about the PSA that circulated a few months ago regarding The-House-of-Hemingway’s relationship and unacceptable sexual interactions with someone who was a minor. Hemingway now goes by C-a-l-y-p-s-o. This post will discuss the details of the PSA, as well as this user’s concerning past and present behavior. 

To the best of the ability of those responsible for this document, the username will continually be updated so that this person cannot interact with members of this community again without disclosing who they are, regardless if the interaction is safe-for-work or not.

The following post is intended to bring awareness to someone who is

Confirmed to be a groomer.

Attempting to convince members of the pokeask community that they have “changed” but is clearly trying to win favor with you.

A risk to the community, cannot be safely trusted, and needs to exit community spaces.

Disclaimers 

Harassment of Calypso in any form is unacceptable behavior. The purpose of this post is to inform. This is not a call for hostile action beyond a block on every social media possible. 

Please respect the victim’s boundaries and do not badger them for further details than what has been disclosed. While disagreement and discussion is OK, please keep your comments outside of tumblr and public discord servers. 

If harassment occurs, the names of any individuals who dogpile, send death threats to, or doxx those involved with this situation will also be listed (with concrete evidence only) on this document. 

TL;DR

Tumblr user @C-a-l-y-p-s-o, previously known as the mod behind the pokeask blog “house-of-hemingway,” is a confirmed groomer who has deleted their admission of guilt to save face.

Calypso has violated a boundary that is expected between a victim and an abuser by leveraging themselves into positions of authority (server moderators, event leaders, etc.)

Calypso has broken promises made to their peers over the course of their internet presence, changing names and website profiles/identities in order to escape the responsibility for their actions.

Calypso is attempting to fall back into good graces by sending copy-pasted positivity asks on mundays to sweep their notoriety under the rug. 

This document will contain proof of the above in exhaustive detail under the “readmore”, or if you are viewing this in the public google document form, it will be under the resources.

We are using this as an opportunity to take a firm stance against grooming in the community, and to express our support for survivors. Our goal is to address the circumstances under which it happens with preventive guidelines and trauma-informed resources.

Resources & Education

What does grooming look like? A quick guide written by survivors of abuse within the Pokeask community:

The adult may not approach you with the intention of grooming you. 

The objective of grooming is for an adult to turn their bond with a minor into a transactional relationship; circumstances in which the minor is providing something for them— whether that be emotional support or sexual gratification— and normalizes breaking boundaries to do so.

Though they may not realize they are blurring or overstepping your boundaries, the effect is still the same; they are desensitizing you to unfair and inappropriate treatment.

Many adults deal with mental illness, go through hard times, and struggle with loneliness. If you’re acquaintances or friends, you naturally might want to support them, “fix” their problems, or do them favors because they’ve been nice to you or because they’re not being malicious.

But ultimately, prioritizing their wellbeing compromises your own, well-meaning or not. That is what an imbalanced power dynamic looks like, and it is up to the adult to realize this, acknowledge it, and seek out other outlets, resources, people, and help available to them. 

A responsible adult does not take advantage of your availability when given the opportunity to do so over other appropriate choices, no matter what. 

The adult may expect you to be available at all times.

Guilt-tripping when you do not respond to their messages, spamming your DMs, or demanding that you spend most of your online time with them. 

Making time for them might mean you end up spending less time with your friends and become distant from others in your social circle. 

A red flag to look for is if they call you their “best / closest friend” over other adult relationships in their life.

The adult may put the burden of their mental health or well-being on you. 

This can include constant venting / oversharing, validation seeking, or coming to you when they are in a mental health crisis. This can happen in private dms or in public servers. 

Remember, no one individual is responsible for managing a loved one’s mental health, and it is not OK to expect a teenager to intervene when someone is threatening suicide or self-harm. That is for a trained professional to handle.

The adult may invite you into unmoderated spaces with other adults. 

They might have “lighthearted” conversations with you or in front of you about sexual content, flirt with you, share explicit images / memes where you can see them, ask to role-play erotic scenarios with your ocs, or draw NSFW / suggestive art of your ocs / sona. 

Red flags to look for are adults telling you that you are mature for your age, asking you to keep their interactions with you a secret, or interacting inappropriately with you in voice call so that there is no chat log of what they’ve said.

You do not owe your followers or fans your attention if you feel uncomfortable.

A friendship between two artists or between you and a fan of your work should not involve any pressure to reciprocate gift art, respond to asks, or role-play.

If someone crosses your boundaries based on a perceived parasocial relationship with you, or makes you feel guilty for not interacting with them, you are in your full right to block them.

If you suspect an ask is a covert fetish, such as asking you to draw an overly specific subject or situation, report them to an adult in the community.

Similarly, if someone you are a fan of is crossing your boundaries, take a step back to evaluate whether you would be OK with it if they were not someone you admire. 

Just because someone is popular, skilled at art, widely respected, or well-liked does not give them the right to treat you in the ways listed above. 

Listen to your gut; if you feel uncomfortable or unsafe, but are doubting your feelings because you look up to the person you’re interacting with, take a step back and tell someone you trust. No friendship is worth being treated this way.

If you suspect you were groomed in the past, or are wondering if a relationship you have with an adult is inappropriate, please look through the information linked in this section. Hotlines, counseling and self-help resources for survivors are listed here as well. 

List of Hotlines by Country | 1, 2 

Global Online Image (CSAM) Removal | 1, 2

Education & Resources | UK, CA, AUS, US (eng, esp)

Online Image Removal | UK, CA, AUS

LGBT+ Specific | UK, CA, AUS, US

BIPOC Specific | UK, CA, AUS, US

United Kingdom

Crisis Support & Counseling (Email, Phone, Text, Video Call; Eng & BSL)

Canada

Counseling (Phone, Text; Eng, Fr, Indigenous languages, Other languages, ASL)

Crisis Support (Phone; First Nations responders available)

Australia

Crisis Support & Counseling (Phone, Text, Other; Several languages available; Aboriginal responders available; Auslan)

United States

Crisis Support & Counseling (Phone, Text, Other; Several languages available; Indigenous responders available; ASL)

About the bill to pressure American corporations to remove reported CSAM from their websites

Coming forward about abuse can be re-traumatizing and difficult, but it can also be healing and liberating— It allows for a survivor to be in charge of their narrative and to lead the conversation surrounding their trauma. 

Sometimes, it takes years to recognize trauma or past abuse, let alone to be ready to publicly talk about it. It is validating to finally be able to say, “This happened to me. I survived it. I deserved better.” to the world. 

Trauma follows us for a long time. No matter how much time has passed, a victim has the right to disclose their abuse and hold their abuser accountable. It is our responsibility to listen. https://metoomvmt.org/

Full PSA with evidence continued here…

[sometimes-its-family]

Genuinely, don't know what to think anymore.

#I am so confused #And I legit dunno what to do #This whole situation is why I left so like #h #again #I dunno what to think and say. #or what to do. #nova speaks

[sometimes-its-family]

I don't know to even say this. If you think abusing of nice people is your way of socializing/being mean is fun, then you're sick to the head.

Everything that has happened to @/house-of-hemingway is sickening, and further pushing me away from the community, especially since all the attacks have been from members of this community

But the last one was the last straw. The last one was particularly damaging to them. And I'm done. I'm tired of bad stuff happening to them when it's not their fault.

I'm leaving the Pokeask Comunity for good. I'm not coming back at all

I'm leaving this community. I'm tired of this shit.

I'll be at @novatheartist16 /@kirbypencilcurse / @novaartblog , but for this blog, this is it.

Goodbye.

[sometimes-its-family]

Sometimes-its-family) Eclipse @ ????: Ack! Be careful out there! The world is a dangerous place! Why are you such in a hurry, and what the heck is that?

@sometimes-its-family

@starboundcafe

@ask-guildmaster-zoroark

#Pokemon #darling-zorua #DarlaZorua #Zorua #Eclipse #Twileon #EclipseTwileon #AYOOOOOOOO #GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL GAY #THANKS SLEEPY!

[sometimes-its-family]

Help for a friend

Alright, people, I know it's wrong to suddenly reappear on this blog to ask for help, but it's important.

My good friend Ashton @dailyashleighraichu is in dire need of money due to their bank being overdraft. Any amount of money is really appreciated. The best way to help is through their Paypal link I'll leave down below. Please help me and a friend.

#Boost #Art on Tumblr #Help others #Help #Money

[sometimes-its-family]

What an familiar face…

After such an long run, the zorua seemingly relaxed, about time anyway, how about you interact, to find out what she’s up to ? 

Ask her some questions ! ((Some notable thing is, this complete reboot removes any relationships youre characters could have had with mine, and since its only PMD based now no humans so please try avoiding that ! Thank you !

-Sleepy))

#BOOST #GO FOLLOW!

[sometimes-its-family]

(Sometimes-it's-family) Yasumi@Keala: "You feel... different to your sister... Do you visit the dream world often?? Or do you live here?"

"As for your other question; dreamspace is a malleable thing. I am both here and on the mortal plane, no need to visit when you can be at both simultaneously. I just have to decide how much of my conscious to split between them at any one time."

(@sometimes-its-family)

[Keala Event Ask 1/10]

#YOOOOOO #he IS SO CUTE #THANKS DUDE #Yveltal #Torracat #Ask-neontiger

[sometimes-its-family]

Explaining why the blog is not very active anymore

I think it's time we tackle this

Long story short, I'm working on a videogame

The long version is that I needed to change my priorities, working on a videogame of my own, instead of working on the blog. Don't get me wrong, I do like working on the blog and it's not the blog's fault, but rather, my life's been on a rollercoaster emotionally.

There are many aspects to why I need and decided to work on the videogame, for example, to eventually and finally having a financial income, but also, the fact it's a project that I work right on right away, and I have doing so. If you know me, you know that I left college, because of trauma and my neuro-divergence, and I've been trying to build my life ever since. And I feel using my skills for something bigger and better on the long run would help me improve my well-being.

I'll probably return eventually to this blog, posting an image from time to time, but for now the efforts will be given to my video game:

Sol Revised

you can see the progress of the video game in my blog @novaartblog, on which, I'll start posting concept art, references, doodles, asks and overall updates for the game. Hopefully, the game will have a Demo by the end of the year.

I hope you guys can follow me there, and support my work and effort.

I'll see you all among the stars

-Nova

#Nova Talks #OOC #Sol Revised #Sometimes-its-family #announcement

[sometimes-its-family]

So far, what are you the most proud of on this askblog? Can be specific posts, characters, lore, anything.

It's a bit hard to explain, but I'd say that it's the fact that unlike the previous iteration of the blog, this one's easier to follow.

The plot isn't as convoluted, the characters are properly introduced, it's more episodic, etc.

Alongside the Cafe AU, I feel it all makes the blog more likable and a bit more distinct.

[sometimes-its-family]

This the first Munday in a while, but woo yeah, I'm baaaack!

[sometimes-its-family]

#Sometimes-its-family #Umbreon #Pokemon #Secret #:) #Soleil #SoleilUmbreon

[sometimes-its-family]

Thank you so much for Participating in the Flora Ball! Sadly, it will soon come to an end, but the good times continue!

With that said, there's probably not gonna be any more posts for the event from my end. Except for one that involves Soleil.

I've been sadly been hit with the depression, being burnt out and a bit of trauma. With that said, Thank you all for the massive support!

Also worth mentioning, I'll take a break from the blog until Early-Mid April for a few reasons, which include recovering, a forced vacation, wanting to work on the videogame, a new Kirby Videogame Coming out, and planning the next chapter of the blog, which will introduce Yasumi to the story.

I'll see y'all then.

Spoilers for future plans down below:

#FloraBall2022

[sometimes-its-family]

"S-SHUT UP, GODDAMNIT!! I-I....."

@darling-zorua

#FloraBall2022 #Darling-Zorua #Sometimes-its-family #Eclipse #Zorua #pokemon #Twileon #EclipseTwileon #DarlaZorua #Darla #Gays gays gays Homo Full gay

[sometimes-its-family]

@askwornhearts​ @sometimes-its-family​

((Aaa my back-))

#GAY PEOPLES #AAAAA #THANK YOU SO MUCH #floraball2022 #Darling-Zorua #Sometimes-its-family

[sometimes-its-family]

"Yeah, I am. It's just I've been a bit pensive of my relationship with my boyfriend..."

"You have a boyfriend, miss Eclipse?"

"Yeah. The thing is, that he is not really the best. Yet, I still love him, and it's causing me some inner trouble."

"Does he drink milk from the carton?"

"What? No! It's just, he deadnames and doesn't treat me as a woman. I feel he doesn't love me"

"Oh shit. Then, why are you still with him?"

"I don't know! That's the problem! I don't know what's keeping me with him! there's something he does that's keeping me chained to him!"

".....Is he here?"

"Uh, no, why?"

"Well, you definitely need to let go of him as well. So why not dance with someone? I don't think he would mind if you tango'ed with someone. Isn't there anyone you want to dance with?"

"Hmmhmhmhmhmmmmm......"

"Well, then, why don't you go Talk to them? I bet they'll accept dancing with you.

"I'll try. Thank you..... um, sorry, I didn't catch your name."

"Merlicia"

"Thank you Merlicia"

Cameo from @ask-neontiger and @darling-zorua

#floraball2022 #sometimes-its-family #darling-zorua #Ask-neontiger #Pokemon #Eclipse #Merlicia #Dakote #Kote #Darla #Zorua #Twileon #Pikachu #Leafeon #DakoteLeafeon #MerliciaPikachu #EclipseTwileon #DarlaZorua #Time for the gays!!!!!

[sometimes-its-family]

"My knowledge of music outside the region is quite limited unfortunately, so I'm always open to learning about new types of song and dance!" Magpie swirls around the Twileon, eyes shining with excitement. "Ah! But your question. I find it difficult to pick just one when each have their own unique qualities to be considered. I'm most used to singing arias and ballads, however."

( @sometimes-its-family )

#👀👀👀 #YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO #THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!

[sometimes-its-family]

Background Reference of the Rooftop!

#FloraBall2022