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strvwberryblcnde · 3 years
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At some point, someone had plopped a pastel blue cowboy hat atop Jude’s head. Fit with a t-shirt sporting a cartoon of Prince Philip beheaded, held mid air by a fist in the thinning hair on his scalp, a pair of low scoop, green Dr Martens and socks with at least three visible moth bitten holes in the ankles, it was fair to say he looked rather out of place in the backroom of Blue Bulls, where everyone glittered like saliva globbed rock salt, pebbles adrift at the bottom of a neon lit fish tank. At some point, he’d fetched a plastic vase from a corner table and dumped it’s plastic daffodil onto the floor, crudely thumped against a counter to insist the bartender top it to the brim. Beer, maybe. It had the tang of an unwashed penny, whatever it was, taste buds numbed from an extortionate succession of spliffs out back -- he couldn’t distinguish it, much like he struggled to distinguish anything when his eyes had reached the squint they had. “What’s, uh... What’s this... saucy little number?” Jude inquired, already in the process of prodding what appeared to be a nipple pasty to his face, shaped like the rustic western saddle of a Clint Eastwood flick. It crumpled, air pockets evident, uncomfortable against the jut of his cheekbone, a therapy patient nestled into the bony structure of a wooden chaise longue. Staff milled like members of an ant colony, ever in search of fallen breadcrumbs, tips from rowdy patrons, ignoring this flannel shirt clad stranger who’d somehow infiltrated the bar’s back room. “Fuckin’... You got any apples, back here? Feel a bit like chomping. Teeth are raring, ready to go. Might even fuckin’... Invest in cannibalism, as a hobby. Talked to a flat earther, out there. He could...” trailed off, “be my first pick” lost as bloodshot eyes slid to register someone clipping up assless chaps, slow blink returning his focus towards Cosmo. A pause, drizzled on forever like honey off a spoon. At one point, it almost seemed as if he’d neglect to say anything at all. “Want a cig?” Complete diversion of topic. Nothing stuck, in Jude’s brain. Cut and paste. A newspaper article composed entirely of mismatch headlines, one after another, no correlation. “Can roll you one. Only got fuckin’... liquorice papers, though. Decrepit conditions. Feel like, uh... Like... James Franco in 127 hours. About to gnaw my, uh... my fuckin’... arm off.” @gasclines​
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strvwberryblcnde · 3 years
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In the time since Jude had last seen Rosa, he’d almost set his dorm on fire by nodding off with a lit spliff, crashed a car into a brick wall (intent behind this pending investigation) and received a rather squiggly stick ‘n’ poke of a dog with socked paws and an eggplant plump snout on his shoulder, ‘DOG IS GOD’ scrawled finely above. The lettering was still subtly raised, red around the edges to match the rim of his blinks. Sketching arm cast and snug to his chest, Teddy had attempted to roll him his usual abundance with little help from Jude’s perfectionist backseat driving, fingers quaking enough that he couldn’t help but squint in dismay for the entire process. He’d still thanked Teddy for his assistance, though he couldn’t help but eye the line of spliffs like they were a spider thumped relentlessly beneath an obnoxiously heavy bible, eight limbs splayed and crooked on a hardwood floor. He was out back, away from the party’s hub, sat on a bench before a pond which had spawned a sizeable caviar stack of frog’s eggs beneath the shadow cast by a thicket of grass. There was a candle clumsily thumped onto a saucer besides him -- a fine China plate he’d stolen from a cupboard by the sink -- and wax dribbled like an incontinent member of the elderly while the flame swayed, about as graceless as Jude looked, all fractured and bruised, banana paper dangling from his mouth like an exotic jungle moth taken perch. He’d spoken to Rosa, since the rooftop -- little things, here and there -- until suddenly, like a radio tossed into of a bathtub with it’s receptors fried, nothing. No signal, no communication. Then the crash, the swapping seats with a sober passenger, the shifting in a hospital bed as they asked him uncomfortable questions, each floating him up and further away. Forgive me for being frank, but you don’t seem... affected by this. You don’t seem to care that this could have been much worse. “Alright?” he greeted after a short delay, only realising someone had approached when he blinked upwards of the pond, gaging just a silhouette, at first -- then, swift as a backhand to the face, Rosa’s name in his throat, not ready to leave his mouth but not willing to swallow and digest itself, either. His eyes drooped back to the pond, glimmering with the moon, so wet and silver he was half tempted to fish it out with a butterfly net and crack it open in a pan, suck the yolk to poison whatever sleeping werewolf he had living inside him. “Caught me doing my, uh... Dickens stroll of the grounds,” he referenced the candle besides him, suddenly sorry he wasn’t wearing Edwardian pyjamas fit with a pompom tipped night cap, breezeless night doing wonders for the glow’s survival. Like some deity somewhere thought he ought to catch a break, swamp marsh of his brain considered, a no man’s land he’d entered and never returned from, feet firmly lodged and sinking. Engulfed all the way to his neck, his eyelids. “Just saw a fuckin’... particularly handsome frog, leaping about in the reeds. Potential, uh... eyebrow lift, very striking. Member of the Hadid dynasty, ‘s my bet. Got any, uh...” Stall. “Fuckin’... Dunno what’s, uh... Chapstick?” he finished like his mind had stalled, a Nokia operating on a one bar network, eyes on the pond despite their usual obligation to watch her like he’d never watched anything else. There was an apology there, maybe, in his reluctance to acknowledge the need for one. Jude fumbled through these things with the long limbed awkwardness of a giant in a cottage with low ceilings, never particularly sure how to express anything, never sure if he even wanted to try. It felt like attempting fluency in a foreign language he’d never learned, sometimes. Being sincere about anything. Admitting he felt things. “Might, uh... Might pucker up. Kiss a fella back to his true form. Do my bit.” @excvlsior​
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strvwberryblcnde · 3 years
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excvlsior​
The world pounded in harsh, bass-front music that was enough to make voices shake from the execution. Teddy was sure his bones were aching with it, but he also couldn’t tell his left from his rights. His veins stung and sparkled in the same way a dropped can of Coke would, fizz ready to bubble up and over the lip the sudden it was cracked open. Teddy wanted to crack open - he wanted the floors of the club to swallow him whole so that he never had to leave. Instead, he turned to Lana, leaning in close so that he could speak loudly in her ear, “What do you want to drink?” Already reaching into his pocket for his cash, signalling he’d pay - easier this way, sure to make it so that they’d get onto the dance floor quicker. The pills that made his skin itch with the need to move, to be pressed close to someone, had his gaze darting over and over to where people were elbow to elbow. An admittedly shitty Britney Spears remix was playing, but it was the best thing Teddy had ever heard in that moment, “What,” he started, only pausing to laugh at nothing, “in tarnation did you give me?” The high was a laughable one, in retrospect, considering what it usually took for him to have a good night, but it’d been a while that he was this high from that small a dose. It all but had him crawling out of his skin, too much too soon, hand rising and falling from Lana’s hip, to where he brushed back a piece of her hair, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. They probably looked inseparable to the untrained eye, and anyone who assumed so wouldn’t be far off. @strvwberryblcnde​
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Lana felt like a series of prismatic images layered on top of each other on a projector, the kind her math teacher would scrawl obtuse angles onto in an underwhelming presentation she paid a criminal lack of attention to in high school: nothing distinct, everything blurry. Water colour that couldn’t dry. Teddy only heightened that -- in a way, made her feel like she had one eye scrunched shut, other gawking through the lens of a kaleidoscope, fists twisting and adjusting until everything was only colours and shapes. “Water,” she blurted so fast it left like a bullet, grin springing as she leaned equally close, meeting him more than halfway. “Or rum. Wait, maybe rum. Rum’s better, can I change my answer? Judges! I’m changing. That’s a better answer.” Cheek to cheek. She had to resist the urge to rest there, eyes shut, thump of bass dwarfed by the space heater flush of his face. Briefly, she imagined draping her socks off his shoulders, spare lacy negligees, letting them toast after a hasty fetch from a washing machine. Teddy was shrugging inside of a warm sweater on a cold morning, in this fantasy. She had to force herself to keep her toes frosted as frozen carrots, to resist from stretching her arms inside of his sleeves. “It was, like, not even that strong, trust me,” she insisted, though the rabid dart of her pupils said otherwise, wide enough to match the bottomless jacuzzi of despair scientists had donned a brine pool off the coast of New Orleans. “Like, on a scale from weak to strong, it’d be, like, a -- a puny little ant colony, not even Dwayne Johnson. Trust me.” Re-emphasised. Perhaps she’d forgotten she’d said it at all. It was difficult to catalogue her words in her head when his hand was on her hip, though. Cheek. Shoulder. A hand of her own slunk up before she had the chance to blink, finger and thumb gently pooching his lips into that of a goldfish. Eerily familiar. Like they used to. There wasn’t even a reason for doing so, just an inclination towards fidgeting, a preference for touching rather than twitching over the hem of her dress. “Hey, can you dance with us? Like...” trailed off, mouth dry enough that it was forced into swallow. Lana wet her lips. Her hand left though her thumb still poked his bottom lip like she was chasing a ball of string in front of a waiting cat’s paw. They edged closer in the bar’s queue, a world of their own. When Lana spoke, it was directed at his mouth. “Like, I know Jake’s here, or whatever,” she shrugged off like it was an inconvenience, the mention of a stubbed toe before a mile long hike. Jake. One in a very long series of poorly mannered apes. Lana’s favourite accessory again, of late, since arriving in L.A. Sometimes, he’d grasp a fistful of Lana’s hair like a cat biting the scruff of it’s favourite kitten’s neck, plucking it from a scrabble of claws to lick it’s fur elsewhere. Lana liked playing, though. Far less boastfully, she liked claws, too -- didn’t mind a scratch, so long as she’d been chosen to receive it, a special pick from a sea of millions. “But, like... It’ll be fun. And I don’t think he’ll mind. ‘Cause that’s weird -- I mean, that’s, like, intense, honestly. Kinda dramatic, if he does. ‘Cause dancing’s just fun, right? Dancing’s fun,” she repeated, suddenly sick with the urge to lay her palm to his chest, flat in wait for a pulse. Rather than oblige, she stepped into the gap in front, wedged between Teddy and bar, humming whatever notes she recognised before resting her head -- tilting it, slightly, when she realised it was perched against his collarbone, breath warm as the cellophane stick of her skin. None of this involved static. Always technicolour, screen abuzz with constantly switched channels -- rocking gently on the heels of her boots, hips swaying with the butchered remix. She felt a little like the tracks of a runaway steam train, always trembling, hot with escape. “What’d you want? I can say it. I wanna say things. Makes my tongue feel kinda nice when I say things. Things. You know? Like... You know. Nice. Things. Tell me something to say,” she urged, smile infectious, all of a sudden stuck with the toe scrunching notion she’d challenged him something forbidden, something they daren’t ever say, not any more. A wide eyed blink followed the slope of his nose, bounced back to find equally bloated pupils. “Wanna see how it feels in my mouth. Please,” she added, cough drop on a scratchy throat, unsure whether she’d actually stretched to press a kiss to his cheek or merely imagined it -- a witness to their left would’ve testified the former, eyes on the conversation like it was the sordid contents of an incognito Chrome tab. “It’s like one of your acting classes. You play director, I’ll -- I wanna read your script. Gimme one, I’ll get an Oscar nomination. Promise.”
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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I once took like, ten Vicodin, and drank an entire thing of tequila and then I like, blacked out for three days. But while I was blacked out, I like, still went to school and did homework and shit. It was really weird.
ZENDAYA COLEMAN as RUE BENNETT
EUPHORIA (2019–)
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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memorylover​
“Yeah. Those?” Gabe pointed at a few weeds that were blooming above the concrete, green and yellowish grass coming up as if the skyscraper they were on was about to be overtaken back by Earth. “My mom, uh, really liked lilacs, I guess. She made everything in my room that color when I was a kid. Isn’t it funny how pretty it is here? On top of a fucking condominium complex in New York City. I miss
 trees. Maybe I should become Amish.” He took a finger once again to investigate the daisy atop Lana’s ear, softly plucking petals in a he loves me, he loves me not manner. He tickled the inside of the daisy then brushed the tip of her nose the way she would do to him sometimes, a child’s way of affection. Lana was the only person he felt comfortable with mindlessly touching, twirling, because it was what she did to him – a scratch to the nape of the neck, a tug on the sleeve. He took his hand to the center of her forehead in between her eyebrows, creating a slight wrinkle so she looked mildly uninterested or unsettled. “There. Now you’re mysterious,” Gabe grinned, quoting the famous scene from Almost Famous. 
He moved towards the railing of the edge, lanky upper-half slumped over as he looked down. Cars and taxis and crowds of people were going by constantly, a never-ending cinemagraph. The world was always too big – it was something both treacherous and comforting to his boy-self, but now he had felt too old for it, like he was meant to stay eternally on some beachside porch for the rest of his life in an old man’s body. He looked down and wondered what it would be like to fall or fly, body hitting the impact of something, whether deathly or otherworldly. Anything that was beyond the mundanity of his current day. His eyebrows furrowed, fixated on a cat below sauntering around the corner of a street alley. He was probably too close to the edge, he figured, but he couldn’t get his eyes off the street so many feet below them. Exhaling, he took a step back and looked at Lana again, almost like a source of comfort. A guardian angel in the flesh. They were quiet together for a big, Lana gazing at the flowers with more curiosity than he had. Gabe took it upon himself to gently braid a strand of her auburn hair like a fixation, then tucked the daisy from his ear into the braid. She now had the appearance of a Dr. Seuss character with the daisy sticking up out of her hair like an extra ear. “Hey. You pick the next place.”
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Lifting hands between them as he answered, Lana traced his collar bone through his shirt, back and forth along the width like an idle windscreen wiper. She imagined it as the edging to a stretch of garden soil, even considered asking him to arch his shoulder so a shallow would appear in which she could fantasise lilacs sprouting, petals trembling like a nervous chihuahua with every heart’s thump. “One of my favourite bubblegums were lilac like those, in high school. Like you. It was my favourite, ‘cause it tasted like perfume -- like, the smell of perfume, the really sweet, sugary stuff everyone used to douse themselves in -- and it was the best to blow. Totally, hands down. Which... Huh. Kinda, like... scandalous, when you think of it like that,” she realised, cheeks plump with an impish smile as her eyes found his. “Like I loved you best. Like I blew you all the time.” Lana scrunched her nose then laughed at the hand to her forehead, a domino effect -- face ever reactive, fourth of July explosions whenever anyone so much as lit a match to a household candle. She managed to tug him down by the wrist before he stepped away, conduct a playful nip at the fingers he’d poked in means of “scolding”. 
Lana flanked him like a shadow as he neared the edge, mostly oblivious to the way his mind wandered -- all she knew was he’d fallen silent, something she sought to rectify by starting two fingertips at the lowest notch of his spine, almost tailbone, and daintily spidering them up until they reached the spot between his shoulder blades. She didn’t even realise she’d been humming Itsy Bitsy Spider under her breath, until him turning revved said hum to the point where it vaguely resembled a cat’s purr, right at the base of her throat, gone from passive to enthralled just by the fact he was looking at her. “You mean I have to play tour guide?” Lana pooched her bottom lip in mock tantrum. “But I don’t even have a whistle and a huge, honking megaphone. How’s my fleet of tourists gonna hear me? Ugh. So upsetting. I’ll, like... have to totally yodel. Or... I mean, megaphones are kind of a lot, though. Don’t you think? Maybe it’s for the best.” She slipped a hand to find his wordlessly, fingers interlaced as she pulled him to the elevator. “I think, sometimes, it’s way more effective to get people to listen to you when you whisper. Kinda,” she began, pressed briefly onto tiptoes so that her lips could brush his cheek, feather light and skimmed, settled eventually by his earlobe, “like this.” Pulled back with a grin, Lana practically lugged him into the elevator like a child savagely flailing their favourite toy at the playground, threads attaching shoulder bound to wear and fray. When the doors slid shut, Lana was already toying with a corkscrew curl by his temple, unfurled into a exclamation point only to let it spring back and reform as a question. “I know a place,” she divulged, voice warm as a lit wick, wax in her gut melting -- steadily, it’d approach the point of dripping as it always did, with Lana, but she ignored it. “A few streets over. Two places in one, actually. I’ll get double points, right? We’re keeping score. What’d you wanna get if you win?” She’d jabbed a button, struggling to resist lighting up them all. The elevator descended floors as her eyes flit over his face, drinking up everything like a drunk finally breaking a five year sobriety. Like she’d forgotten she’d asked a question, she blurted a second, barely leaving time for him to think. “Wanna play another game, on the way?” Restless to the point of imitating the Energiser Bunny on a daily basis, Lana plucked up the hand she was holding to spin beneath it, a halfhearted ballroom twirl. A laugh parted her lips like somehow, through his silence, he’d delivered a punchline worthy of a standing ovation. With a ding, they started through the lobby, Lana chattering all the while. “Kinda like an eye for an eye. Question for a question. That was, like, the thing, in high school, remember? Whenever a guy was bursting out of his pants, like, harder than Hulk Hogan’s abs, he’d be all, like... twenty questions? Ugh. So tragic. I mean, just cut the bullshit and grab my wrists or something, you know? Way more fun than hearing those guys talk. Asking when I last touched myself. Maybe I’m impatient, or... Whatever. Wanna play?” she perked up like she hadn’t just dismissed it, city air hitting her cheeks, hair fluttering like ribbons in the breeze with her stride. “You can ask me, first. Something you really wanna. Something you never have.”
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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đŸ‘« teddy/lana
send a đŸ‘« and I’ll write four headcanons i have about our muses’ relationship.
ok so. lana has a habit of sharing food as one of her many love languages i think. she jst likes.... giving ppl things even if it means she’ll have less. she’d let a wolf make a meal out of her n eat every last piece if she loved him n she knew he’d feel full. bt of everyone i feel like teddy hs always been the one she does this w most.... like even when they first met in the cafeteria she gave him spoonfuls of her greek yogurt n honey. whenever she’s eating fruit (which is a lot she’s obsessed w strawberries n peaches n grapes n tangerines n oranges) she’ll ALWAYS give him half whether tht’s segmenting up pieces or dividing bites evenly between them n Without Fail it’ll always b half tht she gives him whereas she might give other ppl like.... a bite or a piece or two bt......... it’s rly specific each time tht she gives teddy half. it isn’t even intentional it’s jst like a subconscious thing bt if we were to slide on spectacles n analyse this in an english class fr it’s Meaning then. looks at u then looks away. i think this represents the way tht teddy hs always felt like another half of her. they’re one in the same. in a lot of ways they’re very similar mayb even................ TOO similar n that’s why it’s been sch a fking.... bastard of trying to work things out ever bc they very much hv the same rampant commitment issues n bad timing n fears of never being gd enough. i feel like in the past a guy she ws dating (noncommittally as lana tended to do these things) wld have even noticed this n it would have bugged him a lot just like... how close she was w teddy in general............. n he would’ve one day brought it up in the middle of a fight he’d picked jst cutting away from what they were talking abt to be like. u only ever give me one bite but u would give teddy all of it if he asked u to. tell me i’m wrong. n she’d scoff out a laugh in disbelief looking around like omg...... all this over a fruit...... what are u even sa-- n he’d cut her off n be like. literally tell me i’m wrong lana. n she wouldn’t even b able to after going quiet n rly realising what it was he was actually Saying. he’d storm out. relationship over. icons of always being a little bit in love w each other n not even noticing it until someone else points it out <3
god. sighs dramatically at the idea i jst had. i cn imagine in la verse lana being rly drunk getting bk from a date one time n inevitably it was just some random loser since she’s back to dating Trash in this era bc she just truly cbas trying after her breakup w dom n............. it would be like a parallel to tht one time they’d fallen out over him sleeping w imogen when she ws upset w him bt crawled into his bed drunk at a party just to lie w him for a little while despite everything...... she wld have gone to his instead of hers on some drunken automatic pilot n somehow got into his room n..... she’d clamber in n flop nxt to him n maybe it wld be funny at first if he woke up n was like lana what the fk...... are u doing here.... so disorientated n confused.......... n she’d just be joking initially bt very clearly drunk like making fun of her date talking abt how he kept complimenting his own hair n calling himself a tesla in a sea of prius’ n checking himself out in every window they passed n then the laughter wld slowly trickle off n she’d go kind of quiet fr a moment n maybe teddy wld assume she ws passing out bc she’d drank sm bt after a short silence she’d perk up with a mumble out of nowhere n, barely conscious of what she’s saying, b like “why didn’t u wait for me like u said u would”. n if he was like.............. huh? she’d have her eyes shut n just b murmuring half awake then open them sleepily to look at him n rly quietly be like........ “u promised”. mayb she’d even reach out to gingerly trace his face bt then her wrist wld go slack bc she was rly tired n she’d just wriggle closer n tuck her head to get comfy n be like “warm” then promptly fall asleep. JSGSFKGHFHGKHGSFKH. literally jst jolting him awake w this rarely serious n genuine conversation then passing out. jst the worst fk teddy’s life bet he lay there staring at the ceiling fr so long after tht one <3 lana wouldn’t remember this in the morning either she’d wake up like why am i here........ did we meet up last night............ teddy jst like >_> u crashed here it was nbd.
i picture the first week they moved to LA lana wldn’t have admitted it bt she wld be feeling rly homesick............ radcliffe was very much like the first place she truly felt was her home n she’d miss all of the ppl there n just the general area A Lot............. one night i can see her jst wanting to spend with teddy to have like a sense of familiarity in an unfamiliar city (even if she’s spent a decent amt of time there over the yrs bc of jameson records hving studios etc bt still) n i’m imagining them like. breaking into an indoor swimming complex that her n her friends in high skl used to break into in the summers when they vacationed yrs ago.... maybe lana still has a key cut tht works from a connection she made bk then idk <3 it doesn’t matter <3 n they’d inevitably be drunk n just messing around n splashing each other n doing handstand competitions n all the typical..... fun frivolous childish antics lana n teddy tend to get into whenever they’re around each other.... truly jst transformed into big kids whenever they’re in the other’s company..... inspired a little by this gifset jst in terms of the playing around underwater vibe. anyway. mayb they mostly dry off bt they end up climbing up onto the rooftop after n it’s a baking summer night anyway so it isn’t like they’ll catch a cold being damp bt they share a big fluffy towel n bottle of rum between them huddled overlooking the lights of the city. n maybe somehow it gets onto lana admitting how much she misses home n how it’s kind of weird being here especially bc she’s further from caleb. she’s never been this far from him since he was away in the army n we all kno hw tht turned out. mayb she’d go a bit quiet after saying this bt then i think she’d take his hand w their fingers laced together n she’d rest her head on his shoulder n be like. at least i’ll always have u. it’s like i took a piece of home w me. we’ve always had each other like that. then she’d perk up n lift her head n be like let’s make a deal. i’ll be ur home if u’ll be mine. ok? n make him pinky promise. i dnt think she’d quite consider the sentimentality in tht bt 😔 she nvr rly does she jst says what feels natural without attention paid to the deeper meaning tht motivated it n.... sighs. looks at u then looks away....
this is inspired by tht scene in don’t trust the b in apartment 23 where she’s like “look. that video of me getting rawed by my best friend means the world to me.” KJGFGJKSFHKGHKSFGHKFSHKGSHGK god. inevitably in lana n teddy’s prime when they were literally hooking up 24/7 in earlier college yrs they made.............. a few videos. i mean it’s jst realistic. it’s jst common sense. probably even a feature length film at one point. n i had this idea where bc teddy’s trying to get into acting etc mayb if he gets an agent his agent is like.... do u have any dirt u need to take care of? loose ends to tie up? incriminating files to delete? sex tapes? n if he was like... ya..... mayb his agent wld have asked him to delete them if he still had them on his computer or w.e i mean i kno lana wld n wouldn’t have deleted them she wld have been proud of their work of art...... bt maybe he told lana abt this just laughing abt it n the atmosphere ws lighthearted at first bc she’d find it rly funny too like ommmmggggggg i’m a skeleton in ur closet tht is so fun if u get famous i cld be blasted all over perez hilton that’s kind of sexy..... bt............... mayb she’d as a joke be like. mayb we shld watch it one last time before u delete it. kind of like a funeral service. a goodbye party. sailing out the flaming viking raft n paying our respects u know??? n they were joking bk n forth bt then she’d be like. seriously tho mayb we should? growing more accustomed to the idea actually being a genuine one even tho tht is fking. the WORST idea i have EVER heard in the world like i do NOT know how lana wld think she has the self control to do that bt in her head she’s like. teddy n i are jst best friends now... it’s fine........... we’re open w each other it’s just a bit of fun.......... n then i can imagine if he went along w this it’s like a game of chicken they’re playing w each other where they’re both like fking hell shd we do this.... dnt wna seem like I’M the one tht thinks i can’t handle it........ n it’s some back n forth like nick n jess in new girl where they’re daring each other to have the threeway w the landlord. bt then like not even.... a minute into watching it as they’re both silently holding their breath n crunching popcorn they mde for the occasion (insisting on acting like it ws just a normal movie night) lana wld literally have to be like. slams laptop shut. UMMMM i forgot.... i....... have a very important meeting......... n teddy’s just like. meeting? u don’t have a job... what are u ta-- n she’s like A MEETING A VERY IMPORTANT MEETING...... very blatantly squirming around as she slowly gets up n tries to head fr the door... n teddy’s like.... taking the excuse without much question too like... ya i have to run lines actually i jst remembered gt an audition coming up..... n they’re both like ya haha... maybe some other time.... or maybe just delete it it’s whatever.... anyway we gtg haha... bye.... ttyl...... lana wld literally hv to SPRINT out of there to go home n. deal w how flustered this made her i won’t lie. she bumps into parker n is all flushed in the face n is just like CAN’T TALK BYE n takes off sprinting again like some kind of freak. it’d b a train wreck. i jst think that’d b rly funny tho n dare i say it? it’s canon. 
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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đŸ‘« preston & scout
send a đŸ‘« and I’ll write four headcanons i have about our muses’ relationship.
i cn imagine them somehow being wrangled into babysitting fr her sister bethan one time n.... she has three kids who r all young (like 6, 7 n 7 bc she had twin boys then a girl) n they’re all a handful in their own way. the boys r SO boisterous n loud like they’re truly feral n the girl is very.... like scout bt..... an outspoken n absolutely fearless version...... the only time she’s quiet is when she’s reading a book. anyway. i cn see scout n preston being run RAGGED hving to look after these demons like the boys wld slap mud prints onto the wallpaper..... they’d pull drawers out looking fr their confiscated toys when they misbehaved n cutlery wld crash bc it’d fall on the floor... they’d run away frm the scene of this crime after..... bebe scout wld be like..... UR THE UGLIEST BOYS I’VE EVER KNOWN..... AND I HATE U!!!!! hurling crayons at her brothers fr their mischief... n scout n preston wld have to somehow neutralise all of this chaos. it wld be exhausting. i cn anticipate it mounting frustrations n tensions to the point where scout n preston might even bicker between themselves jst over stupid stuff like scout being like preston u can’t give them chocolate before they’ve had their dinner n preston being like cmon.... let them live a little...... this isn’t a dictatorship... n scout being like do u WANT them to b bouncing off the WALLS???? literally like a married couple.... they’d finally manage to put them to bed in bethan’s room (which ws renovated into a room w three beds fr them to stay in when bethan needs help aka needs scout to babysit) n scout wld usher preston frm the room to let them settle n once she thought he wasn’t watching she’d tuck each in n kiss their heads n be like love u hell spawns. then she’d go dwn n eye preston on the couch frm the doorway like >_> bt still go to get them a beer each..... i cn picture literally by the time she returns frm the kitchen preston being asleep bc the children r relentless.... n even if they’d been bickering a bunch scout wld roll her eyes n kind of smile abt it n swig her beer then put it dwn n grab a blanket n carefully tuck it over him so he didn’t catch a cold in their drafty house w a faulty boiler.......... sickening.
this is related to scout’s nephews n niece again bt in summer they always play in the yard w the hose n i can picture scout n preston having like.... a fight in the morning mayb n her storming dwnstairs n leaving him to get dressed n leave or whatever jst childishly........ n then by the time he got down if it ws summer the kids wld be prancing around outside n shrieking up a storm as scout sat angrily in a fold out chair watching over them........ mayb they’d all b like PRESTON PRESTON STAY N PLAY n he’d be like i’m gna head home............... n they’re like NO PLAY W US PLAY W US n one of the boys even sprays him w the hose. mayb preston wld join in playing w them just picking him up n pretending to fling him around n they’d all be laughing n screaming n scout wld be a tiny bit mellowed by this bt still stubbornly clinging to being mad...... her niece is like SCOUT PLAY WITH US PLAY WITH US n she’s like maybe in a bit. i cn imagine preston spraying her w a little bit of water frm the hose to b childish kind of joining in w the kids being a nuisance n scout being like WTF??????? n then snatching the hose off him n spraying him bk n it just breaking into an all out war where they’re trying to get the hose off each other n both end up soaking wet n she breaks  n laughs n he’s picking her up as the kids all cackle n scream. their fight jst somehow resolved in the space of half an hr when they were jst on the verge of another stupid breakup............. this tumultuous relationship........ no wonder their friends r sick of them.
scout’s dad is...... certainly a character n she hasn’t heard from him in yrs bt he made a big reputation fr himself in town to say the least.... was just in w some rly shady ppl n always fucking everyone over fr his own selfish agenda.... truly jst a liability to b associated w nvm to have as a husband/father so the wilders rly.... went thru it a bit w him. it ws like being buckled into a rollercoaster. nw he’s been gone a few yrs they’ve managed to pick up some of the shrapnel he left behind bt there’s still pieces n tht’s evident in the fact tht every so often guys he used to run w will come knocking trying to shake them dwn fr debts Poppa Wilder still owes them. he’s on the run frm the law nw n they hv no idea where he is bt they still have to deal w these repercussions. anyway. scout is very much like... I Will Deal With Everything In The World On My Own bt with luca in prison, jasper out n about all the time n rarely home sometimes bc he’s a free spirit, her mum working long night shifts n sleeping thru the day n her sister bethan being moved out w kids a lot of the time it’s..... just scout in the house which she wld never admit gets rly lonely after growing up w a big hectic family. i cn imagine one of these guys waiting fr scout after her shift at the diner n just asking her again when he’s gna get his money n her being like fr the last time idk where my waste of space father is!!!!!! n he wouldn’t make a threat or anything bt he knows where they live so tht night i feel like scout wld be kind of nervous n peering out of the curtains a lot jst On Guard in case he shows up to take wht he’s owed by fleecing the place or smthn. mostly paranoia idk if he actually wld bt. scout wld just be kind of scared sleeping there alone n even if she’d wna deal w it on her own i feel like she’d put off contacting preston until pretty late when she’d eventually snap n just be like. can u stay over tonight? n she wouldn’t text it either which is kind of unusual fr her bc she mostly texts bt she’d wna hear his voice to calm her a little i think. again none of this wld b verbalised she wouldn’t even tell him abt this situation bc she tries to be independent as possible n not rely on anyone else fr anything bt......... it would calm her down a lot when he arrived n ws sleeping nxt to her. i feel like his laidback attitude is quite gd for her in tht respect like it has a soothing effect at times..... others perhaps not bt <3 miley cyrus life’s a climb.....
i feel like her ex............. wld not be happy abt scout dating preston. he’s quite a loose canon / volatile character n jst............... scrappy.......... n antagonistic sometimes...... not the worst bt definitely not the best! honestly i feel like if he ever bumped into preston he wld maybe even pick a fight w him except he wouldn’t mention scout he would just act like it wasn’t related bt it Would Be. if preston ws injured in any way via this then i can’t even express hw furious scout wld be she’d actually lose it a bit.... KJGFKHFKGHSFKGHS hell hath no fury like a scout wilder scorned <3 she’d nurse preston better if he had a bust lip or whtever (she’s quite gd at doing these things after yrs of living w reckless brothers who were always getting into fights n also hving a mother who’s in nursing n taught her first aid etc) n she literally wld refuse if he tried to be like i can do this myself she’d b like SIT. DOWN. stomping around the place grabbing her supplies n being so angry until it actually came to like.... dabbing his face where she’d b extremely gentle. stark contrast. she’d keep ranting abt how she was gna confront her ex fr it n even if preston was like just leave it she’d refuse at first then eventually be like ok :) w a tight lipped smile bt. the next day bc she knows where her ex hangs out she’d storm up to him on the street n jst fking RIP him a new one she’d b fully shouting at him unleashing such an ungodly rant w no fks given to who was watching..............if it was in a tv show i’d imagine her rampage all silent as opera music plays over the top n she’s jst yelling in slow motion as a child across the street gasps so loud at the multitude of swear words raining in his direction.... honestly i cn imagine this getting bk to preston w how public it was bt i get the feeling tht even tho he might’ve been like nah leave it he wld find her unbridled wrath funny n know it ws rooted in hw protective she is of those she loves which. as reluctant as she ever likes to admit it definitely includes him at this point.....
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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đŸ‘« ford nd bradley
send a đŸ‘« and I’ll write four headcanons i have about our muses’ relationship.
i feel like they have a recurring theme of rooftops.... they’re always hanging out on them historically in threads bt i also feel like they have a couple of different things they do on rooftops. obviously a staple is drinking an atrocious amt n smoking until their throats r hoarse with it bt. i feel like once bradley invited him to a rooftop in college n when he arrived she just had a duffel bag w a bunch of watermelons in. how had she lugged them all up there i honestly dnt know. n it would be a weird cathartic thing in a way of just. hurling them off n watching them splat on the pavement a few stories below. inevitably once bradley said smthn rly alarming bt she’d say it in her nonchalant way like. sometimes i picture it as my skull when it cracks open. all tht gutted fruit kind of looks like brain if u stare long enough. if u know what brain looks like. know what i mean? n she’d look at him n smoke n do a small smile like tht wasn’t the most horrific thing to say in a casual conversation..... Just Bradley Things <3 bt then also maybe this wld evolve into a fun thing where she brings a sharpie n they draw someone they kno tht pisses them off on the watermelon to give it a face before they toss it. she probably drew elias once n before she threw it she was like She Slept In My Bed! Sh-sh-sh-sh-she Slept In My Bed! pretending to remix him crying at the party tht time before lobbing it n laughing when it exploded into mulch. mayb once it hit a car windshield of a professor n the alarm started blaring n they were like. shit. n had to run away. bradley wld laugh as they ran she finds chaos amusing
i dnt think they’ve ever kissed tht i can recall???? n in a way bradley is probably kind of thankful fr tht. it’s like when ur a kid n u shut ur eyes like somehow that means the monster won’t b there bc u can’t see it. her eyes r very much shut to the concept of ever actually indulging tht want bc it just is clearly.................. a doomed possibility tht she knows shd be let go. black balloon by the kills playing in the bkground. even if they were in a situation where they got told to kiss as a dare or smthn like that i feel like bradley wld deflect from the dare being given n start roasting a random npc tht had given her the dare just fr the sake of shifting the focal point of conversation n avoiding it. it’s jst a bit like giving a crumb to a starving person n expecting them to nt want to eat more. it’s better to have nothing at all than to get a taste of something bt know u’ll never be allowed to feel full. he’s destined to get married n have bebes with vee n bradley knows this n knows she’s destined fr........ something else shall we say! reminds me of the new girl nick n jess scene where he doesn’t wna kiss her on the dare n she’s like why not let’s jst do it n he blurts out NOT LIKE THIS!!!!! n she’s like huh.... except the roles r reversed n bradley wldn’t say tht it’s just. the sentiment. it’s a nice daydream every so often when she’s drunk enough to nt be able to ignore it bt that’s what it’ll have to remain <3
ok so building from tht one time when she vanished fr a month to mexico n didn’t even contact anyone except fr ford in the form of rly weird concerning postcards when... she was unravelling a little mentally..... they were mostly incoherent n just saying random choppy sentences that didn’t quite cooperate with one another n just.... making strange jokes n doing little drawings n whatever..... bt i feel like there was one that was the least nonsensical of them all tht bradley never sent to him bt she just kept it fr herself n the front was a beach at night where nothing was rly visible except fr the moon in the water n everything was almost jet black. n on the back she just wrote “i don’t want to be scared any more.” bradley hates being vulnerable w her emotions so much n any admission of a bad feeling she categorises in her brain as stupid n childish bc of her dad’s brainwashing so idk if she wld ever share this w him n..... she’d usually expect herself to erase the evidence n rip this up into pieces n throw it away bt she just can’t bring herself to. she doesn’t know why. in a way it feels like the only physical manifestation of the trust she has in ford tht she’s ever been able to put her hands on n hold. n even if it makes her feel small tht isn’t something she can bring herself to get rid of. subconsciously she doesn’t wna give up on the idea tht someone is still capable of reaching her like tht
lastly. idk if u remember tht one time she lived in a loft n she ws rly depressed n she just let a bunch of randoms come in n party in her place all the time n she ended up w so many strangers jst.... squatting in her place n partying 24/7 she’d hv to lock herself in her bathroom if she wanted to b alone fr a minute to breathe in her own place... she jst was not doing well.... which was made most evident by the fact she splashed a bunch of black paint of her white brick wall n painted out a rly messy weird scrawled lump of a Thing with holes for eyes and teeth. it kind of looked like a wolf bt nothing Of This Realm. if we’re being real it ws meant to be her dad n how he’s always with her no matter where she is jst Looming. she was just.... Not Okay to say the least bt. i feel like one time she wld have greeted ford if he came over n she’d just b in her rage against the machine tank n no pants smoking lking so run down.... someone get her a banana bag iv..... some vitamins.... please im begging..... n anyway i jst feel like if he saw that on her wall n saw all the people there he’d evict them for her bc she was at a point where she honestly didn’t care abt anything so wouldn’t even think to do it herself n maybe he’d come back w white paint n go over it once she’d finally let herself crash enough off 45987425 drugs to get a few hrs of sleep..... jst like...... them being there fr each other is always thru indirect acts i feel rather than actual acknowledged words n. sighs. i can just see this being the conclusion to tht whole destructive narrative or at least an attempt to rectify it. again bradley hates being vulnerable bt she wld just rly briefly be like. thanks. nt even looking him in the face n then just change subjects like she hadn’t said it. ask if he wanted to go to a dive bar n shove ppl over in mosh pits so they gt stampeded like mufasa fr the thrill
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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đŸ‘« lana & dom
send a đŸ‘« and I’ll write four headcanons i have about our muses’ relationship.
lana buys lots of things on random whims n i feel like smthn she wld have bought the summer her n dom started properly seeing each other is a polaroid camera. probably one of those fujifilm mini ones in pink w stickers on of holographic mermaids n butterflies. n all her friends wld be subject to hving their photos taken on this at 447294734 parties but fr the most part like 50% of the film wld be spent on dom esp considering how often they’d see each other. i cn imagine her being annoying abt it e.g. bursting in unannounced when he ws showering n flinging the curtain bk n shrieking in delight as she tkes a pic of him in there. penis NOT in shot (lana ws very disappointed when she realised altho inevitably dom ws relieved). it ws probably rly blurry too from her springing out of nowhere n running away after she’d dazed him w the flash bt lana wld never dream of throwing it away she’s probably like ugh cole sprouse WISHES he ws me tht stupid i’m weird i’m a weirdo bitch i’m taking his photographer crown n i’m loving it..... another time if she ws wearing his tshirt or smthn jst to laze around in she wld have tried to convince dom to wear her cropped bowie t-shirt she usually lounges in she’d b like OUTFIT SWAP!!!! like it ws a reality show segment. she’d do his hair w her strawberry clips n everything n wna take a polaroid of tht as well. a majority of these polaroids wld b taken w her sat on top of him in bed peeping thru the viewfinder n grinning sickeningly wide after. she’s bad at organisation bt she wld keep very close track of these polaroids n treasure them a lot bc they’d document a summer where she was rly rly happy. probably took them with her to la too she jst has them hidden somewhere.... idk if she’d ever b able to bring herself to throw them away to b honest
i jst had this vision of lana n dom taking franklin to the park n i already told u abt how she’d tell franklin tht she gives the flowers all their own names n say he shld come up w his own names fr them too bc it’s more fun tht way bt. i cn imagine if they saw two bees trying to pollinate the same flower n like buzzing close to each other if franklin pointed it out lana wld gasp n be like OMG they’re in love. they’re married bees. u can tell frm how bright their stripes r they’re extra yellow n glowing like the sun tht’s what happens. tht means they’re in love franklin. n idk if franklin wld say this or not bt if he asked what loves like lana wld b like hmMMM well. love’s kind of like being first in the queue fr the best rollercoaster. or licking the sugar off ur fingers when they’re all sticky frm candy floss. going to the zoo n getting to see all ur favourite animals on a day tht’s sunny but not TOO hot. enough to give ur nose freckles bt not burn ur shoulders. make u feel toasty like ur inside a cocoon. n love’s like........ she’d pause here. she’s crouched dwn on his lvl as she says this mayb dom hs walked off to get them ice creams n she briefly lks at him in the distance as he’s paying before lking bk at franklin. scrunching her nose playfully as she tries to stall. when she hesitantly continues she’s like. n love’s like getting home after tht perfect day at the zoo n finally getting into bed w fresh sheets when ur sleepy n ur eyes r all droopy n heavy. the pillows r fluffy n it’s safe n warm n all of the gd in the world at once. i think love’s like tht. it’s jst.... nice n stuff. n she’d jst be like :) afterwards realising she’d rambled on n change the subject like hey lk at that BUTTERFLY franklin............. bt i jst think this is. particularly heartwarming to me bc not only wld she have been basing tht on hw she feels abt dom bt. in the past love ws always a thing w barbs tht hurt her whenever she tried to hold it n.... he jst rly transformed her idea of being loved by someone into smthn safe n reliable n consistent......... smthn she cld actually make a home out of instead of constantly hving an eye on the door in case they leave / she needs an escape route..... a relationship isn’t a scary concept w him
lana n dom r like. opposites when it comes to social media esp instagram...... dom jst nt even knowing hw to use it n lana posting so regularly hving a small following fr her fashion n whtever.......... i feel like lana wld try to teach him how to use it bt it wld consist of a lot of her being like no that’s--.... dom that’s--.... that’s not ri--.... n jst throwing her head bk n cackling so much she wld b rly endeared by him being clueless abt it she’d be like ommmmmmmmmg it’s ok i’ll b steve jobs n u can be my sexy assistant tht just has to strut besides me like a car dealership model whenever i go on stage to debut the nxt technological advancement. dom wld have to be like... isn’t he dead? lana wld gasp so suddenly n be like omfggggggggg tht explains why me calling this tech nerd wearing a turtleneck steve jobs lst week bombed so hard mayb he thought i ws telling him to die..... dom’s probably like... i doubt he thought tht lana..... she wld laugh at the thought of this anyway n change topics jst the worst attention span already over it. ALSO this is instagram related bt.... bev.kingston wld rly centralise her hate crusade onto dom when it became clear they were dating / things gt mre official n serious. mostly lana wld b like this is so funny n dumb bt.... i think she wld dm bev.kingston one time being like. ok all jokes aside can u cool it a little on the dom hate not to b gross bt he makes me rly happy n i dnt want him to b sad if he ever advances beyond a technological grandpa n sees all this stuff. bev.kingston wld literally screenshot this n post it on her insta like LANA AND I HAVE BEEN IN CLOSE CONTACT I HAVE DECIDED EVANS BOY IS ON TRIAL BASIS EVEN IF I HATE IN MY HEART AND KNOW FREYA IS ONE FOR HER  n she’d update her page like 21/08/2020 LANA DM’D ME ABOUT EVANS BOY (or whtever the date ws) n it’d be sm. lana wld b embarrassed she’d try to get her to delete it she’d b like fk my fking life ur sick bev ur lit rally sick.....
lana treats halloween as a week long celebration she goes to sm parties tht she literally hs to have like..... 482759872 costumes planned each yr. n fr one of them. she’d b like let’s go as each other :) n she’d dress as an angel n he’d dress as a devil. she’d put on red lipstick before they went purely to “help w his costume” n it’d jst consist of her leaving lipstick prints on his cheek n neck n hip even if. his hip wsnt visible w the top he ws wearing she’d b like dom listen.... listen. it’s literally part of the vision n it’s necessary......... it doesn’t matter if ppl can’t see it we’ll both kno it’s there n it’ll elevate the look so mch...... w that attention to detail u cld even b in the running fr winning a prize...... then she wld take the lipstick off like it wldnt even be part of her outfit she only put it on to do this specifically. she’d insist on them getting a photo tgether n it’d b a bit gross it’d b a whole thing she jst.... wld b very proud to b seen w him she’d show him off a lot.... if anyone complimented her outfit she’d b like ya n have u seen dom he’s a devil we match :) n if there ws another pair tht had worn the same which i mean there probably might it isn’t a hugely original concept bt lana wld be like......... ummmmm tht guy is the most pathetic devil i hv literally ever seen..... if she ws drunk she might even b like ummm.... hw does it feel fr dom to be a sexier devil than u............... does it sting? jealous i bet....... n dom wld have to b like lana please.... im sry abt her.... u lk gd haha...... cushioning the blow. taking her hand n leading her away. n lana is jst tittering n murmurs in his ear like. he knew it ws true u cld see it in his eyes. he knew u lkd better than him. 
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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đŸ‘« viktor lana :D
send a đŸ‘« and I’ll write four headcanons i have about our muses’ relationship.
he he he he (me doing an evil little laugh tht daunts n unnerves everyone around me)..... i knew u would send this i already thought of this hc in advance when i rb’d the post. ahem. i will begin. tht time they went motel hopping n wreaking havoc bc they were both suspended from radcliffe i imagine one night a motel they got to was booked full n they’d got there rly late so they were jst like fk it let’s sleep in the car. viktor’s hearse. n if he happened to have fallen asleep first i feel like she wld have been like huh.............. he lks weirdly peaceful when he sleeps almost like he doesn’t wna bite the whole world into tiny little pieces fr once. she’d feel like she ws sighting a rare exotic bird in the wild like it ws some special privilege i think she’d smile to herself abt it like a loser. n lana is literally so physically affectionate she’s like a gross over excitable puppy so i cn imagine her wriggling up to him n carefully as possible plopping his arm over her as he slept. inspired by this image bt rly just.... in any form she’d tuck herself up w him n sleep tht way w the aim of somehow waking up first n moving before he realised she’d done it. idk if tht would have happened i wnt lie lana sleeps rly soundly when she’s cosy w ppl she likes so <3 mayb he ws disgusted by this when he woke up n saw it bt it’s ok <3 lana wld laugh it off n not care
i think i might hv mentioned this as a hc very briefly in a reply before bt???? i jst thought of it again now. i hv this idea in my head of a game lana wld play with viktor where she’d draw in biro on her thigh a grid fr noughts and crosses except she usually does like. stars and hearts or just a way more Lana version..... i cn imagine her making him play this w her when they were like. jst sat out on the beach in provincetown or in bed after 👀 except i think she wld let him choose what he drew for his turns. smthn to represent him. mayb she’d suggest a ram’s head like black phillip fr his sexy chaotic satanic goat aura n he’d be like ya sure i’ll draw a whole fking detailed ram’s head in this tiny square lana n she’d be like ugh ur talent ur mind jst ignoring the sarcasm n loving it instead. in a similar ball park i feel like she wld doodle things on his tattoos like a penis on his marble statue-esque one (if tht is actually canon i cnt remember if u said it was i won’t lie) n jst things like tht. rly all of these things r just an excuse to touch him n vice versa bt. the noughts n crosses game in particular is one she made up just fr him.
fr his bday i feel like lana wld give him a homemade coupon tht entitles him to an elaborately staged rouse where they entrap some loser man w a fake relationship / spat / whtever which involves her seducing him n viktor finding them n freaking out. like they hv before bt. maybe this one wld even involve sfx blood it wld be extreme n dramatic n scandalous. mayb lana wld at one point put in fake vampire teeth. it wld be ridiculous the guy wld be like what the fuck who are u people. he wld maybe get genuinely injured it wld be a lot. sometimes lana can b a bit immoral fr the drama of it all i feel like viktor brings out her most rogue side n honestly tht is sexy. bt anyway in addition to this she wld ask judes help n get him to do a drawing/piece of tatiana. she wld be nervous abt giving this to viktor bc obviously he doesn’t like talking abt / confronting vulnerable topics so i feel like she’d jst slip it into an envelope n leave it in his room as a silent gift from her n not be there to see his reaction or anything. i think she might not even sign her name she’d jst kiss a lipstick print onto the envelope n know he’d recognise who it was by the colour bc of tht time he said he’d know it anywhere. sighs n lks away...
ok so. fr the night where lana stole trent’s car keys n walked up to viktor at tht party n was basically like “hey wna steal a car w me :)” in not so many words.... this is hw i envision the night panning out. they went speeding. lana at various points was dangling way too much out of the window n holding her hands out bc she loves feeling the wind on her fingers when ppl drive fast. hair jst blasting everywhere truly no concern fr safety. viktor probably literally hd to haul her bk into the car by her ass at numerous points bc she almost flew out n died. she’d ask him to find an empty lot where they cld spin n skid around the place n keep being like AGAIN AGAIN CAN WE GO AGAIN like a giddy child requesting another go on the swings. after all tht fun i feel like she wld hv been like lets drive out somewhere quiet n they’d end up like. at some kind of lake in the woods. mayb they get out there idk bt after all the thrill/novelty wore off a bit i feel like trent’s car wld mke lana sad bc she has bad memories associated with it / him in general n she’d jst impulsively hit the bonnet n try to snap the windscreen wipers n struggle doing it bc she doesn’t hv the arm strength so she’d jst be like ERGH!!!!!!!!!! n try to kick the car after giving up n it wld be rly hard n hurt her foot n she’d b swearing like FK this car it’s so UGLY......... jst the worst tantrum bc her heart’s never Rly in it when she’s angry it’s always just very clear she’s sad n trying to make tht sadness seem braver. mayb his way of calming her dwn in this situation wld b like. let’s sink the fker <3 n lana is silent fr a bit before being like. sniffs. ok :) bt she’ll only do it if they’re in the car n drive it into the lake bc she wants to see all of trent’s shitty cds get wet n ruined frm the inside. anyway. it happens. they hv to climb out of the lake sopping wet n walk bk all tht way. is it cold? idk. this ws all a hideous idea bt that’s on brand. i won’t lie she’d maybe silently hold his hand on the walk bk fr a little while n if he commented on it be like ummmm if we don’t work together to preserve body heat we Lit Rally might get hypothermia viktor don’t b a BABY abt it i’m saving ur life if anything u shd thank me i dnt even wna hold ur big sexy hand i’m jst playing paramedic... bt in reality who r we kidding. she’d jst wna hold his hand. she’s sick <3
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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Send a đŸ‘«and I’ll write four headcanons I have about our muse’s relationship
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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memorylover​
“Never got a good read at Blake. A nice fellow, it seems. I’m sorry that
 happened,” Gabe frowned. “Yeah? So would I. Are you calling me a rat?” His awkwardness had a boyish charm, at least to most people. Lana always had more energy than him, which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, but sometimes he wanted to take her hands and lay with her in a dark room for the peace of it all. He felt it right then, maybe because they were in a place so public and he had recalled that every meeting they had at Yates for a long time that wasn’t in the bathroom of a party or her barging into his room was always surrounded by others. He had always been on his own by the end of that semester, and now he was on his own semi-permanently without the comfort of the same companionship she or Teddy could provide. That was the beauty of feeling anonymous in the city, he supposed, even though he had known it for most of his life. “I’m actually so fascinated by the Amish. Don’t you think it’d be nice to not use technology and churn butter in a field? I’ve always thought about a way to escape like that, but without all the religion and maybe the cultish bullshit. Makes me think of Midsommar when I feel like fucking off into the woods. Personally I think I could thrive as long as I kept my mouth shut. RIP to knockoff Chris Pratt, but I’m different. Yes, I’m sure you could really rock a milkmaid’s dress. Every other Amish woman would be threatened in the way God would grace your presence. Whoa! I’m a fucking poet now.”
Gabe nodded in agreement. “I think she is cyborg. Certainly in the same way Ellen Degeneres is a cyborg. Their eyes are like
 soulless. I’m convinced that once you reach a certain tier of fame your soul gets sold to Satan. Or the Patron Saint of humility. End the concept of celebrity, man!” He giggled at her touch, shaking his head to get away from her finger. His hair was shorter than it was at Lockwood so there wasn’t the same poodle-like effect of shaking his head. He always felt different, but then again, when was the last time he had the luxury of feeling like he belonged in his body? He stuck the pad of his thumb to his tongue and put it to Lana’s forehead, her bright eyes wide like a cartoon’s, as if expecting a bit of stardust to fall in between them. He had noticed the soft curve of her doll-like nose and slid his finger down, tapping. The urge to kiss her bubbled up almost instantaneously, though interrupted by the ding of the elevator doors opening. “Here we are.”
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Perhaps it was selfish, setting up a mouse trap like she’d been trying to, cube of cheese metaphorically manifested as her finger tracked a line down her sternum. She didn’t even realise what she’d been vying for when a licked thumb to her forehead steadily exhaled the breath from her chest, disappointment almost enough to make her cheeks flush. It felt like it’d been a long time since she’d been touched, really touched, by someone that loved her, knew her right down to her marrow. An exaggeration, perhaps -- it’d only been a handful of months since she’d moved to Los Angeles but rather unnervingly, in the time she’d been dating Dom, she’d gotten used to it. It was like a stray dog getting by on scraps from strangers for years until it finally got to know what having an owner was like, someone who’d consistently tuck her close at night and kiss the top of her head in the morning. Returning to her usual suspects -- rough hands, no attention paid to the words from her mouth -- was, in a way, like pulling that same white sheet over her head and playing ghost again, wandering the corridors of her family home without detection. It’d been nice, for a little while. Getting to be alive, like that. Lana smiled at him like he’d given her everything and broke away from his space, jabbing a random button and making a leap to exit the elevator. She tossed a laugh over her shoulder for the cherry on top of the cake. All seamless, red velvet drawn for the theatre production to commence. There wasn’t a point in chasing more. She needed to remember that. 
Lana reached out to thumb the pink petals of a passing flower, a hoard funnelled towards her like the trumpets of an orchestra. “I used to call those Lilas,” she told him, hand moving to cup a purple, stouter type, pop of yellow in the centre like it’d attempted to ingest a buttercup, flower-on-flower cannibalism. Lana inhaled as if she’d been handed a perfume tester in a department store, breath of content parting red lips. “Vivians.” Rushed like a bee to a fresh source of honey, Lana approached another that looked like it’d only freshly unfurled, swollen and huge -- bigger than any fist Lana could make, that was sure. It stuck out like a sore thumb. So orange it could’ve burnt down an entire forest, reduced Rome to ash. It was difficult to look away. Too much, almost. Staring the sun dead on without glasses. “Lanas,” she greeted with a sift at a long petal, something curdling in the pit of her stomach like week old milk. They had them in their garden when she was little. She could still remember rain splattering them down to a droop as Tommy and Caleb danced with her. Regardless, Lana wore a grin brighter than a football stadium when she turned to look at Gabe. “I’d give them all my own names. Way more fun,” came with a flit of her eyes elsewhere, memory of a shorter recipient of this story rattling around in the back of her brain. Unwanted tenant. “I think, like... everyone should give their own names to everything. The world’s more fun when it’s yours, don’t you think? When you’re friends with it.” There wasn’t a specific meaning in that, as there tended to lack in most of the things Lana rambled about -- nothing someone could pick out, anyway, even if she knew what she’d meant. She severed a daisy and slid the stem behind her ear, investigating his expression as she righted it’s position. Then, she did the same. This time, for him. A step drew her closer, reaching to tuck his daisy into place. His left, her right. Opposites. “Which flower’s Gabriel?” she asked fairly nonchalant, pupils drifting to plot out familiar freckles. When she edged him further, she wasn’t sure if she was talking about the flower that represented him or the person she’d known in college -- a grasp for a hand in a dark bedroom, something to anchor yourself with in the middle of a bad dream. “Is he here?”
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
Conversation
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viktor: who the fuck's darcy
viktor: fucking ... pride n prejudice bitch man? sideburns bitch man? big bitch baby man?
vikor: fucking pretentious
viktor: [...]
viktor: your ears are pretty small tbh
viktor: [...]
viktor: huh. alright fkn uh
viktor: gonna name myself fucking .. charles bingley spiritually connect with darcy thru our fucking past lives or whatever
viktor: whats he look like again? have simon cowell post plastic surgery in mind
viktor: [...]
viktor: what you want me to dress as a fucking french mime or something?
lana: EW!!!!!!!!!!! NVR!!!!!!!! tlk abt sideburns to me EVR!!!!!!!!!! again viktor i'm literally so dry... i'm so upset rn i'm shaking i'm SHAKING!!!!!!!!!!!!
lana: i mean tht Lit Rally is his name viktor it's nt like he picked it himself no need to paddle his ass red raw omfg he has a wife he has CHILDREN!!!!!
lana: altho cum 2 think 💩💡 myb he did pick it idk his life story????????
lana: anyways jst some guy
lana: omg rly u think so??????? tht's so nice ugh when he says ur ears r small ❀ feeling like a sxy ant ❀ cute little gerbil jameson ❀ screenshotted n sent 2 relationship goals twitter hq ❀
lana: [...]
lana: idk WHO or WHAT a charles bingy is i jst hd to google him hw do u know sm abt pride n prejudice viktor this is honestly kind of sxy of u omggggggg when he knows things ommmmmmmmg...
lana: [ sent an image. ]
lana: i mean tht isn't wht i meant bt as a sidenote i think tht wld b a total look for u n i don't hate it at all n think tht's a career u shd invest ur spare time in bc i wld clap n support it for no biased reasons purely 2 support the arts NO!!!!!!!!!! 🛑❗ OBJECTIFICATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ⚠❌
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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lana: ok so 📝 darcy is bringing me 2 whtever dumb lame uglie stupid loser rich ppl thing they're doing tn idk he mentioned a pool ngl i zoned out???????????? like my ears were There n they lkd SO cute like my ears tend to (ugh we love it) bt were they processing words???? idk 👂💔 except i DO kno n they weren't ❀ ugh i'm so honest n raw n real❀
lana: anyways it's prbly this big house in the hills where they hv parties w someone on the door bc it's an invite thing bt i feel like u cld Easily talk ur way in if u look at the girl in tht way u do like jst shoot her a viktor look or smthn
lana: they kno my rl name which is pretty lame tbh idk why i did tht bt we all mke mistakes
lana: are u gna do a fake??????
lana: i think myb u shd dress the part 2. i'm jst gna say wht evryone in this gc ws thinking i've LITERALLY hd enough of evryone biting their tongue ovr this... beret đŸ„–đŸ’Š
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
Text
A dirty sneaker was lobbed from a back window, thumping Ziggy on the back as he stooped to pull on his shorts. There was already one of the set by his feet. “Fuck!” he barked, whipping his head around with a gawk of disbelief -- as he did, he caught eyes with a pedestrian unfortunate enough to happen upon the bizarre street scene. “Fuck me in the ass, am I right, ladies? It’s raining missiles. I’m getting beaten, papa!” he called out frantically, throwing a wild glance as if to locate said father. When he next spoke, it was with a chuckle at his company. “If I knew my dad he’d be pretty fuckin’ sympathetic right now, I bet. But alas... I’M just a POOR. BOY. From a poor fam-a-lee! Scaramoosh, scaramoosh, she just hurt my spine-o!” he halfheartedly sang a rendition of Bohemian Rhapsody, zipping up pastel blue cargo shorts. He seemed in no rush to get dressed, despite the public setting. Instead, he reached back and rubbed his back, stretching out. Limbering as if gearing up for a sports match. “Shit... Got any ointment on you? That cougar has the pitcher’s arm of the evil dentist from my dreams. Eerie. Recurring nightmare. Shit’s warped. She hit me with a canine, a few nights ago -- right in the eye. My own. Fucked up. It’s all fucked, it’s fucked!” he urged, wholly invested in the bit -- in a few seconds, wildly ruffling atrociously bleached hair as if to re-calibrate his thoughts, he reached out and slapped twice at their shoulder. “Hey, bum a cig? Bum a cig for a guy in -- a guy in need? I’m going through something, here. Me. Ziggy Benson.” He stooped to get his tie dye tee, missing a couple times before finally latching. “That’s -- crafty little bitch. Slithering around the place, you see that? We’ve got a jumping bean on the premises, officer. Sights locked.” Ziggy straightened, searching for the hole where his head went. From the way he was gathering the material, he seemed to have mixed up with an arm without realising. “You gonna -- you about to console me or what? Pretty cold, if you don’t. I’m just saying. I’m laying the obvious out there.”
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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“Luke, put them back. We’re not gettin’ donuts,” Thea sighed, staring hard at her eleven year old brother until he clunked them onto the shelf with a heave of annoyance. Max, the youngest at eight, crossed his arms and sighed, too. Mimicking. Her father had tasked her with getting the boys out of the house for the day as well as buying groceries, ruffling her hair when she agreed and observing that she’d make a “decent wife some day if she kept this up”. Thea pressed a thin smile on her lips until she left the door, immediately dropping it. Sometimes she fantasised about becoming an old spinster just to spite his prehistoric ideals. Pushing the cart, wheels fairly rickety, she’d only just plopped a head of lettuce in with the rest of their list when she realised Luke had picked up an orange and weighted it. “Hey, no -- remember last time, we can’--,” spilled in a frantic garble that was all too late, fruit lobbed at the head of the closest customer. When both boys erupted into raucous laughter, Thea couldn’t help but snap even if she didn’t mean it. “Y’all are so fuckin’ annoying, I swear.” That didn’t help, much -- Max started prancing around whoever had received the impact in a circle, singing “Thea said a sweaaaar, Thea said a sweaaaar!” Moving around the cart, Thea flashed an apologetic smile as her cheeks flushed pink, reaching to cut Max’s performance short by grabbing at his hand. Like most boys his age, he didn’t shy from the gesture, though he continued to titter under his breath as he stood at her side. “Hey, um... Sorry. We watched Planet of the Apes a couple-a weeks ago and Luke’s gone full primate. I need to put him back in his cage, obviously,” she directed at her brother over her shoulder, who’d started rifling in more of the fruits without apology. Thea flashed a sheepish smile, studying whoever’d been caught in the crossfire. “Is your head okay?”
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strvwberryblcnde · 4 years
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Erupting with a prance-on-the-spot cheer, Lana celebrated the fact that she hadn’t knocked a golf ball into a vase lying in the grass. When she met eyes her opponent in this tournament, she grinned in means of explanation, only elaborating when she held out the club -- she’d stolen it from a bag in a coat closet, party raided for fun props like a chef seeking the perfect spice from a seasoning rack, a way to make the night taste just right. Lana was intent on tingling tastebuds, no matter where or how. “Every time I miss, Tiger Woods loses a chest hair. It’s a curse I cast. I’m totally capable of that. That’s a new thing for me, FYI. I’m aiming for, like... fully bald, smooth as a swimmer’s ass cheek. I want him to unbutton his shirt one day and cry ‘cause he looks like a porpoise. It’s what he deserves. And anyways, I hit a daisy. See?!” came with an excitedly thrust finger at said point of impact, weed peeking beneath the ball. “That’s gotta be worth a point. That’s -- huh. Kinda sad, actually. I don’t wanna beEeEEe... a merderer...” Lana skipped to bend over, accidentally flashing whoever was behind her as she slid it away, letting the daisy breathe -- this was yet another infraction of the rules of golf, not that Lana cared. When she straightened, it was with a triumphant smile like she’d resuscitated someone who arrested a table over at a restaurant. Hands on her hips, she flashed a superhero pose. “Ugh. I’m so brave. A paramedic on the front lines. Think I should give him the kiss of life, too?” Apparently she’d gendered the daisy. Rather than dwell on her question, she turned to face her opponent. “Hey, that reminds me.” It wasn’t related. Lana pushed butterfly shaped sunglasses from her face, finally able to see better in the dim light. They were hideously impractical, night considered -- even in the day, big and obnoxious as they were. “I know someone who has a crush on you. Like, tongue lolling from their mouth, panting like a sweaty dog and everything. Intense. Super big. Wanna do three guesses?”
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