#{ ch: sunshine and rainbows | vanille }

[charismastaticarchive]

fang & vanille meta/hc

an analysis on co-dependent relationships & mental illness [ note: i absolutely ship fanille, i ship fanille largely because of this meta and because i stan complicated relationships between women, but it could be triggering for those of us who have experienced toxic relationships with mentally ill people as people who are mentally ill themselves in the past. i do not mean to blame either fang or vanille for their co-dependency also. this is something so engrained in their relationship there is no true party at ‘fault’---and it’s so much more complicated than placing blame, as neither of them wants to blame the other at all, and in fact, blames themself.]

firstly. i want to define a co-dependent relationship. co-dependent relationships are relationships in which one person takes the role of a ‘caretaker’ and the other takes the role of an ‘enabler.’ the caretaker sacrifices their own needs, sense of self, morality, relationships with others, boundaries, and sense of intimacy/vulnerability-----in order to ‘people please’ the enabler. the enabler lets them sacricie and do this, letting the caretaker ride their whole sense of self on the enabler.

but the enabler, in fact, does not have to be some sort of monsterous abuser. sometimes, and definitely in the case of vanille & fang, the enabler simply does not know what to do about their partner’s co-dependent tendencies---and genuinely loves and feels they need the caretaker, despite relying on their affection and ‘caretaking’ for self-worth themself. in this definition of a co-dependent relationship, fang is the ‘caretaker’ and vanille is the ‘enabler.’

while obviously co-dependent relationships at first glance would look like an abuser (the enabler) that cruelly uses the obviously mentally ill dependent party (the caretaker), i believe 13 aims to show a more complicated&loving view on how relationships work. 

fang, is, by her own admission---not a good person, that is willing to let the world burn to keep vanille safe. but vanille herself is not the perfect innocent angel fang sees her as----she lies constantly to others, she runs away from her problems and responsibilities, she lets fang take the blame for ragnorak, she quite literally enables others, such as the 13 family and fang, to see her as weak and innocent through her lies about her own competency. she lets fang become ragnorak despite her not wanting to, and while vanille will never be directly at fault for fang’s actions (you can only control yourself), she refuses to talk to fang about anything (which is part of the reason she ran away) and when she does bring up ragnorak later in the game when fang eventaully finds her---she lets herself be soothed/cared for by fang (literally hugged as fang as she cries) instead of delving into the deeper issues of their co-dependency at play.

regardless of who you think is at fault for this largely unequal relationship, both girls blame themselves for it. fang decides that she is simply not a good person---she dives deeper within the role of caretaker, saying that she will tear down the sky for her, giving up her sense of self as her echalion shows that she really does not want to give up their friends to save vanille. vanille, on the other hand, blames herself so much for their co-dependency (shown in its ultimate stages pre-game by fang becoming ragnorak WITHOUT her, literally turning into a monster with many arms, symbolic of taking/giving), that she runs away from the relationship to what she assumes is her OWN DEATH (as she does not want to fulfill her purpose).

in showing fang’s struggle to be her own person/a good person, and vanille’s suicidality, the game shows us that often times, BOTH an enabler and a caretaker are mentally ill, and sometimes, these two parties are drawn to each other because of their mental illness and inability to take care of themselves on their own merits.

from here, i would like to discuss HOW vanille and fang entered their co-dependency, by discussing the ways people beome co-dependent.

co-dependent people often stem from emotionally immature or even abusive parents that WANT things from their children and make their children ‘serve’ their needs and expectations, and who are punished if they do not meet their lofty and often confusing and not specified or objective/normal expectations.

fang&vanille do not have any parents. its implied, at least by them, that gran pulse was kind of a paradise of love&affection. but it did have a drawback---the church (featured in the novel), which both fang&vanille were shown to be strongly against, probably due to many hunters they knew dying bc of being chosen to be l’cie.

the fal’cie are shown to be false gods---but we can also think of the fal’cie as the parents of humanity, like gods are often seen as fathers/mothers, etc. the fal’cie quite literally ask their ‘children’ to serve them---especially in the case of gran pulse where the fal’cie are worshipped---and the way their children are meant to serve them LITERALLY are not told to them in any way. they have to guess their whole lives why the fal’cie are here, and what the fal’cie want, or they will be ‘punished’ by turning into monsters.

this is a perfect metaphor for emotionally toxic parents.

we especially see, as fang & vanille come together to go AGAINST the church (that the rest of gran pulse does not and looks down at them for), that they are isolated from the rest of gran pulse and pushed into their toxic parent’s reach.

this isolation, when compounded with the fact that fang has ALWAYS cared for vanille as a ‘crybaby’, their own mental illness, and fang&vanille having the ‘toxic’ emotional figures, meant that the co-dependency was always bound to happen, no matter how equally they loved each other. (and despite their co-dependency, it’s clear that they really do love each other, just in a way that is harmful to both of them.)

but their relationship is not just co-dependent. the course of the game shows fang&vanille reuniting and growing as people. the game shows that by fang letting other people into their lives (the 13 family), they can BOTH grow out of the co-dependency. fang can start to forge other relationships and her own sense of self and morals that show that she really IS a good person deep down that cares about people other than vanille. vanille can start forging HONESTY with others, including fang, about how she feels about EVERYTHING, and learn to communicate in healthy ways that don’t involve the enabling and people-pleasing/self-sabotaging behaviors.

fang&vanille show that if there is a real, true love beneath the co-dependency, the relationship can grow and become healthy again with the help of others, and by putting in the work with ur mental illness to develop a support system of family and friends who love you.

you can’t just have one person in your life. you can’t just GIVE to one person, or just TAKE from one person. you need a balance, u need to be ur own person, and u need help from ur friends to get out of the emotionally toxic/suicide inducing mindsets your ‘parents’ gave you.

#fanille #{ ooc: hc } #{ ch: lady luck | fang } #{ ch: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #{ hc: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #{ hc: lady luck | fang } #suicide tw

[destinysthralls]

@mettleforged  asked: ☕️ AND RINOA AND VANILLE BECAUSE I SAY SO

AVALANCHE is growing larger by the day. Rinoa and Vanille joined up right around the same time--along with Fang and Squall. There’s news that there will be a new member soon---Tifa’s childhood friend, Cloud.

“Do you think there’s anything goin’ on between them?” Vanille hums, watching Tifa talk to Barret about strategy and the like. She leans in and whispers it in her ear with a gleeful giggle. The whisper ain’t so quiet, though---and Biggs quickly overhears, rolling his eyes at the both of them and taking up arms at the other couch. Vanille sticks her tongue out at him---winking, before turning back to Rinoa. “There’s gotta be, right? The way her face lights up when she talks about him. I hear he’s cute, too!”

#mettleforged #{ ch: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #{ rp: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #THIS IS VANILLE'S FIRST RP.... AND ITS GOSSIPING. THATS SO IC

[charismastaticarchive]

@vaenaera [ ask box memes ( VANILLE & HOPE ) ] :  ‘ i want to believe that we got it right this time. ’

“Oho?” Vanille giggles a bit---nervous as ever. The airheaded act is a hard one to put down, and it comes up whenever she’s feeling uncomfortable... whenever she doesn’t know what to say? She’s right back to playing dumb, being silly, sunshine and rainbows, and only jokes to spare. 

But this is serious. She doesn’t like to think about the future---never has, but this is why.. She worries, too. And she cares about Hope. She cares about him knowing she’s there, and not just the shape of her, an illusion of substance, too light and falsely free to actually hold.

Her smile fades with the crinkle of her eyes, the dimple in her cheek as she frowns and thinks hard. “I don’t have all the answers. Never have,” Vanille gazes down at her feet, and then reaches out a hand, squeezes just Hope’s knuckles. His hands feel so much bigger now, even beneath the gloves. He’s all grown up---not that he ever had much time to be a child to begin with. “But I have you, now, Hope.” The Double entrede is as clear and cliche as ever, and yet, she continues onward. 

“A new family. A new world.” She looks up, sticks out her tongue. “What could possibly go wrong?”

#{ ch: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #{ rp: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #{ fandom: promise me we'll keep living | fxiii } #HOPE THIS IS OKAY!

[destinysthralls]

muse 03. oerba dia vanille

MASTERPOST/STARTER CALL for OERBA DIA VANILLE of FINAL FANTASY XIII

Like for a STARTER or for me to come in to your IMS to PLOT

EXTENDED CASE FILE (x) / OTHER MUSES (under construction)

#{ ch: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #{ starter call: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #ooc

[destinysthralls]

vanille hc:

vanille is a lot smarter than she lets on. its apparently canon that on gran pulse she used to engineer robots and the like. she’s 2 years younger than fang and short and cute with pretty pink hair----she’s used to playing the ‘crybaby’ / ‘pouty princess’ role to get what she wants from fang, and its a natural extension of that when she runs away from the only real partner she’s ever known (and who she’s known her whole life), to play that role with strangers turned up to eleven.

 no longer does she show off how strong and nimble and smart she is like she always did around fang who knows how smart/strong she is but downplays it bc of her own ego and perception of vanille as Someone Who Must Be Protected----vanille doesn’t even want to use physical attacks after she’s learned spells bc it’s a dead giveaway that her experience hunting makes her a TOTAL BADASS---and she doesn’t let people know that she can operate machinery like a boss too.

she’s actually extremely competent, it’s just easier to run away from who she really is because she’s always been unsure of herself, and she wants to be protected and cared for and doesn’t know how else anyone else would want to if she doesn’t make herself smaller and ‘more lovable.’

fang and vanille’s relationship is the most important in both of their lives whether you see it as romantic or not---but it’s also canonly co-dependent in a lot of ways, and full of misunderstandings and capital i Issues. they’re so good for each other, such a good team and they love each other so much, but vanille is naturally manipulative, and fang is naturally overbearing and self-sacrificing, and they play off each other’s insecurities and baby each other instead of calling each other out or actually talking about their problems

it just make the relationship more interesting to me but w/e

#{ ch: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #{ hc: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #{ ch: lady luck | fang } #{ hc: lady luck | fang } #hc #ooc

[destinysthralls]

@sinnhelmingr [ hel + vanille ]

Vanille had only meant to follow Fang into the Fal’cie’s chambers to support her in being chosen. While Vanille was next in line---Fang was supposed to be the chosen hero to lead Gran Pulse in victory against Cocoon---not her. As much as Vanille loved Fang and her village---she didn’t want to be involved in this. Nor did Fang. And they had talked about as much, and perversely, their fervent dislike of the Fal’cie was what had led them to being chosen to be Ragnorak. To kill so many people in tearing out the sky.

And Vanille----Vanille, in the end, had been overcome by her own cowardice. Instead of stopping it---OR being part of it---she had simply stood by and watched Fang do all the Gods dirty work. It was horrific. As she turned to crystal, tears pouring down her chin, she heard screams---thousands of them becoming one, as if in some terrifying unison.

She hadn’t wanted this. Not any of it. She cursed the Goddess that picked them---the ugly form that had writhed and screeched as the ceremony continued---that had picked anyone to do this to other people, innocent or not. She thought that for a thousand years---all she would think about, all she would dream about, were all her fears and worries, realized in that exact moment----

And then she had woken up. Somewhere else.

Fang nowhere to be seen.

Instead another woman---just as beautiful, approached. For a moment, Vanille felt her vision clear of tears, unable to do anything but feel wow-ed at the other’s appearance. Her mind wandered---as if floating in a dream. She pictured holding hands with the stranger, who she felt connected to, heart and soul. Somehow she knew that the stranger did not mean to harm her--that the stranger had brought her here. To be safe. As a reward, somehow, for everything she had been through. That thought alone was enough to bring Vanille to tears once more as she was pushed forward back into thoughts of reality.

She sobbed, biting her lip. “Who are you?!” She demanded. “Where are we?! Where’s Fang?!”

#{ ch: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #{ rp: sunshine and rainbows | vanille } #sinnhelmingr #queue