#DEATH BY GLAMOUR STILL POPPIN'

[weareintheblankbit]

Just had a thought reading this. I think Mac very likely had a wee bit of a slutty phase after he came out. To be precise, the timelines in my head go like this (I’ve kept this under a “keep reading” because jesus this got lengthy):

- From “Charlie catches a Leprechaun” to “Dennis’ Double Life” I reckon he was just trying to navigate the gay nightlife waters (probs secretly until “Hero or Hate Crime”. After he came out: imagine a dog going for a car ride) I can see him very poorly dressed for clubbing, slightly soft around the edges and wearing a mesh shirt that is a bit too big for him, terrorising all the gays with appalling conversational skills, karate dance moves, too much hair gel and the biggest smile :D This Mac doesn’t have game, but gosh darn it, he’s gonna try his best.

- The gay clubbing scene wasn’t really working for him. He probably was trying to be a nonchalant party stud, while desperately wanting somebody to love him, exuding insecurity and desperation. Rejection on the dancefloor is not what a love-starved dude that’s come out on his 40s needs. And then in “Dennis’ Double Life”, he has the opportunity to live out the fake relationship trope, and with somebody that has known him for so long, somebody that gets him. I think that must have made him so happy. But Dennis leaves (him) :(

- From the moment they blow up the Range Rover, my head cannon is that Mac’s also burning his fleeting hope of finally achieving romantic bliss with his life-long crush. He tries the Rainbow again, becoming the unhinged beautiful slutty hunk the OP was talking about. The whole getting ripped thing fits very well to me: Mac’s feeling his oats as a gay man, actually getting attention and having the sex he’s always wanted (and denied to himself for so many years). Of course, Mac being Mac, he’s gonna be being very vocal about EVERYTHING. Impressing the gang is not his only other motivator; in the group dynamic Dennis is the sexy beast, he’s the one that’s often showed off his body, always being vocal about his sexual endeavours. While Dennis was away, Mac filled in for him. (Mac also has a tendency to copycat shit other people do that he interprets as cool). He also carries on doing this after Dennis comes back, which could be him levelling himself up to Dennis, rubbing in his face how much action he’s actually been getting while he was away, and him being an unhinged horny puppy, simultaneously.

- Now, the exciting new lifestyle is not quite working. The gang is not at all impressed with his new physique, they find him even more annoying -which looks like lazy writing but most likely while Dennis was away Mac was clingier and needier towards the rest of the gang- and he still has a Dennis-shaped hole. First he gets the sex doll, and shortly after, the real thing. So! Dennis is back, and... Well, he can’t help himself. He’s been getting real attention from other dudes, he’s looking hot, feeling hot... If any Mac is gonna have a chance with Dennis, it’s gonna be this version, right? Hence all the times he’s apparently tried to kiss Dennis (as mentioned in “Time’s Up for the Gang”), the talk about deepthroating dude’s fingers (this was only in the bloopers but I’m including it) the touches that Dennis shrugs off, the “as I gay man, I do” when Dennis talks about how they know how good he looks in leather.

- This act gets the first cracks during “The Gang Gets New Wheels”, when he says he could do much better than dating Charlie, and Charlie goes “then why don’t you”. I feel you, Mac, it does get harder when you’re older, but let’s be honest here. We start to circle back to Mac’s true longing: something more meaningful. We are shown Mac’s desired alternate reality in “The Gang Does a Clipshow” when he imagines Dennis leaving Paddy’s, but this time with him. He still tries to find solace in aggressive wanking (”The Gang Solves the Bathroom Crisis”) and shirtless Rex (”The Gang Wins the Big Game”), but he just ends up chafed, and Rex is more Invigaron Berry than beefcake at this point.

- We’ve arrived at “Mac Finds his Pride”, where we finally have a Mac that openly admits he doesn’t know where he fits, or how to feel fulfilled as a gay man. Definitely not objectifying himself (bye bye Rainbow, and fuck you Paddy’s parade float), not through cliches like leather culture and drag queens. But first things first, there’s a last piece of the mask he needs to shed, in front of the person with whom he’s needed to be the most delusional: Luther.

- After “Pride”, we start S14 with romance. “The Gang Gets Romantic”, Mac is leading the scheme, Dennis is stepping down to second place, and Mac becomes the romantic lead he yearns to be (if only for a second).

The rest of season 14 I think has more to do with Dennis having his own freakout than Mac. In my opinion, Mac gets so ridiculously clingy and anxious about Dennis approval because Dennis is acting fucking weird, and Mac, having tried and failed to make Dennis want him, doesn’t know how to bring the dynamic duo back, or how to prevent Dennis from leaving again.

I just wanted to also mention something I’ve seen in the macdennis tag already, which is the way Mac dresses in season 14. He’s covering himself more (more to do with Rob getting rid of his tattoos with laser beams I think but let’s overthink this headcannon to death), he’s not so obsessed with showing his glamour muscles (he actually has proper muscles now, so he doesn’t need to act up). He’s just trying to get comfy (uwu).

Like I said, I reckon S14 is more about Dennis’ feelings, but Mac is still dealing with this new stage in his life, and apart from his Dennis freak outs, he’s also trying to know what’s his relationship with God as an openly gay man ("The Gang Solves Global Warming"), struggles with being assertive ("The Gang Chokes"), and tries to hold onto the last of his family life (Poppins!).

Ehm. So. Yep.

#macdennis #IASIP #mac macdonald #dennis reynolds #sunny headcannons are all I have #work has drained all happiness from me #these dumb bitches give me joy #haha imagine if after posting it twice and staying late nobody cares about this because the whole fandom has already discussed everything #haha #edit: plottwist this is not showing in the macdennis tag kill me

[burning-bubble-tea]

Honestly I’ve played the similar dnd characters for awhile with my most recent one just being the best iteration of it.

So the characters have been quite different build wise and backstory wise but I’ve always been the sarcastic, fragile, sassy one.

First character, gnome cleric. Died in the first session did not get to develop. Wanted to be a necromancer.

Second character, halfling paladin. Did a lot of damage was kinda quiet and reserved, pretty different from the rest of my characters.

Third character: halfling bard, the beginning of my favourite type of character to play. Funny, a good support character and cute while also…. Collecting……the teeth of her enemies. (It gets worse, I was an edgy teenager).

Fourth character: human druid. I based them off of Disney princesses who sang and had animal companions. Was a spoiled brat who claimed to live among the animals when she actually just decimated local ecosystem by making her parents buy her rabbits. Threw magic stones and killed a lot of people. Got eaten by zombies.

Fifth character: changeling artificer. (Was the unearthed arcana artificer). Uhhh kinda forgettable. Next.

Sixth character: one of my favourites, human glamour bard. Based off of mary poppins. Somehow still has a lawful alignment while being a cannibal because the dm made the mistake of telling us that cannibalism is legal and there are farmed humans. Falls into my habit of glamorous yet scary characters.

Seventh character: only played once but super fun: death domain human cleric. I made them lawful good and as nice as possible. I like juxtaposition.

Eighth character: my favourite name of any of my characters: Mark? (The character was unsure if it was his name so the question mark is a part of his name). Tiefling warlock. Same concept as the seventh. Lawful good and super nice but was a warlock. Liked to cook.

Ninth character: human arcana (I think) cleric. The build was literally just have as many cantrips as possible. I think I had like nine. Super fun character to play. Was a last minute thing so had like barely any personality except cute, powerful and sassy.

Tenth character: so I clearly have a bad habit of making characters that are sassy. Even my nice ones would quip and have wit. This is because when I see a moment to insult my friends in a funny way, I go for it. But that’s not very role play of me. So, this character is sort of my grand finale for now to this character I’ve played often but never in complete campaigns. So, changeling sorcerer. Sassy? Check. Cute? They prefer beautiful but I mean, check. A little bit scary? They’re a shadow sorcerer so… check. The biggest difference though is that since this is like my only character in a proper campaign with consistent players, I can actually interact and role play without feeling over shadowed or worried I am over shadowing because I know everyone at the table and if there’s an issue we can just talk about it :).

Most of my characters are feminine since I want them to give me gender envy but my planned next character I’m super excited to play something a little out of my comfort zone. I want to play, gasp, a traditionally more masculine character.

Future character eleventh: half orc artificer. Another bad habit I have is I try to play optimized builds. I find while it’s fun to succeed at stuff you’re good at, it makes failing a bit more painful since people are betting on you to win. (Though I have learned to find failure hilarious in dnd). So I have found a way to make this character function so he’s useful and plays an integral role in any party while also just being a fun character concept that’s not dependant on playing around with rules and stats. I just wanted nice half orc dude that’s trying his best and he’s not the smartest but he’s trying his best :). I haven’t even played him and I love him. And unlike all my other characters that have been min maxed to filth, I made him nice and balanced with point buy. I just want my magical half orc boy.

#dnd #dungeons and dragons #dnd character #dnd characters

[loneleesoul]

Starker: Party Games Pt. 1

Highschool AU, Cliché bad boy x shy nerd....

This is kinda long because I enjoyed writing this story, I may add more parts in this lil blurb in the future.

🧡🧡🧡

"Don't waste my time Penis Parker." He snarls, pushing the shy trembling boy away. "Y-You asked me to do your homework and I did!" Peter stammers defensively and Tony rolls his eyes, remembering the pathetic conversation about it earlier.

"Yeah, well?? Give it to me." He holds his hand out expectantly, foot tapping impatiently.

With a trembling hand, Peter gives the paper to the angry senior. Tony looks down at it, skimming all of the correct answers. "Not bad Parker, could've gotten some of the answers wrong to make it more realistic." He shrugs, heart softening a bit.

"I'm sorry." Peter whispers, wanting to leave the presence of Tony Stark. He shuffles back a bit, trying to make Tony get the message that this conversation was over.

"Okay Dick, get to class.. I don't want to smear your perfect record." He nods at Peter, hanging back to maintain his late and smart-ass reputation.

Peter's pathetic jog turns into a sprint as the bell rings. He's late for the first time in his highschool career. He slams the door open, an apology falling from his lips as he pants.

"No excuse Parker." The teacher mutters, not even looking up from her phone. He groans in exasperation, sitting down next to Ned. "Late man, disappointed.." He smirks and Peter rests his head on his desk.

"Are you going to Rogers' Party?" Ned asks, leaning so Peter can see him.

"Maybe dude." Peter shrugs, watching Tony stroll through the door, late but unnoticed by the teacher.

"Why not? He's really nice, didn't he help you out when someone put graffiti on your locker?" Ned presses, obviously wanting to hang out with the nicest kid in school. "Ned, most of his friends hate me or whatever." Peter sighs, running a hand through his messy hair.

"Or whatever, you say people hate you when they really don't.. Peter, stop putting yourself down. They just don't know you, it's not hate." Ned puts a sympathetic hand on Peter's shoulder, and they're both oblivious to Tony Stark staring at them.

"Fine, I'll go.. but don't expect me to be like you and socialize, and flop around." Peter sits up, pushing Ned's hand away. "I am a fantastic dancer, I haven't a clue what you are talking about."

"You look like a brain-dead fish getting electrocuted." Peter laughs and Ned smack him with his notebook. "Thanks buddy."

__________

Tony and Ned walk up the long driveway together, looking at the expensive house with longing. "He sure is loaded, look at the security cameras." Ned points to the state of the art security system. "Will we even be let in? Do they think we are gonna steal and search us when we leave?" Peter's worried, stopping before the door.

"Peter, stop freaking out all the time... see here comes Steve now." Ned nods at the god opening the door.

"Hey Peter, Ned.. we were just about to start a game, join us." Steve grabs Peter's hand and drags him inside.

He barely looks at the splendor and glamour of the house as Steve guides him into a huge room.

People sit in a circle on the floor. People don't even acknowledge Peter's presence as they greet Ned happily.

Except for Stark, who sits silent. He stares at Peter long enough for it to get uncomfortable. "Let's start, has everyone played paranoia before?" He's greeted with nods and smirks. "Well, I've got my own little spin on this.. since it's got a 50/50 chance of truth involved, how about a little dare?"

Peter wants to get up and walk all the way home, but Ned holds his leg steady.

"So, if the coin says heads you have to tell.. you also have to do.. whatever it was asked of you to the person. Consent is mandatory of course, otherwise it's a no go. There's a room, third door on the left for privacy." He wears a devilish smile on his lips and Peter shudders, hoping everyone would forget he were here.

"Let's begin, shall we?"

Peter let's out a huge sigh as Steve sits and turns to Bucky instead of him.

"Shit, I can't say you?" He groans when Steve stops whispering. "No, choose." Steve smirks, a boyish glint in his eyes. "Fuuuugh, T'Challa then."

T'Challa looks up from his phone surprised. "Flip a coin then.." He mutters, shrugging.

Bucky tosses the coin and freezes. "No need for a room, spit in my mouth." He says, looking up at T'Challa with a shrug.

Peter has to look away as T'Challa crawls over to Bucky and spits in his mouth.

"Did you really want Rogers' to do that?" Natasha laughs, patting T'Challa on the back as he gets back into his spot. "Yeah, you could still do it Barnes.. beg for it." Tony mocks, arms crossed with a smile.

"Stop guys.. Bruce go." Steve winks at Bucky, who blushes slightly. Bucky takes a few seconds to whisper to Bruce, who grimaces in response.

"Gross, has to be a guy... Sorry Nat, I choose Loki." Bruce laughs and flips a coin. "You'll never know."

Now Peter knows he's never talked to Bruce before, but has definitely tripped and fallen and embarrassed himself in front of him a ton.

Ned's words of 'They don't hate you, they just don't know you' melt away when his name comes out from Natasha's lips.

He's also made an ass of himself in front of her many times. So Peter knows it's bad as the couple laugh over it. Nat flips the coin and smirks. "Sorry kid." She snorts and leans over to Thor.

Peter leans over to Ned's ear "Told you it was a mistake to come here." He mutters and Ned shrugs. "It's paranoia... or whatever Steve's version is.. this is fun though, I won't ever get called for anything sexual. My heart belongs to Beyonce only." He smiles dreamingly and Peter shakes his head, turning back to the game.

Only to see Thor and Loki walking down the hallway and disappearing through the door third to the left. Ned giggles uncontrollably and Peter sighs. Something was bound to happen.

They all wait it out, the fifteen minutes of whatever was going on. Probably some hardcore shit by the look of their hair, tousled and mussed up.

Peter doesn't like to think about it and shudders. He barely registers that it's Tony's turn next.

And of course, he says "Parker" booming confidence the moment Thor stopped whispering. Thor gasps at Tony and supresses a laugh.

Great... probably something awful about how shit Peter is. He just stares at the floor as the coin flips.

"Come on Pete." He's standing, room silent. Peter gawks at him, like it was a joke. "I- I'm sorry what?" He chokes out and Tony groans.

"Parker, room now." He puts his hands on his hips as everyone in the room stares at Peter, waiting for an answer.

"I'm sorry but.. no." He whispers just loud enough for a few people to hear. Tony raises his eyebrows. "Kid you have got to be kidding me you don't even know what I was asked to do. I could make a secret handshake, or we could rob a bank for fucks sake and you're passing me up on that?"

Steve sighs "Tony consent is mandatory.. let it go."

Tony scoffs and sits back down, whispering to Scott. Peter decides to tune out the rest of the game, watching people disappear into the room as Tony glares at him with flaming eyes.

Peter somehow overstepped the mark, pissed off Tony Stark. Which was dangerous and a beating from the likes of Stark could be lethal.

Peter could tell everyone was just upset with him as it became his turn and Ned whispered in his ear.

"Who are you the most afraid of here?"

It's a pathetic question but Ned wasn't a gross pervert like everyone else. Peter prays that it's tails. "Stark."

Which shocks everyone, despite not knowing the question. Maybe it was the lack of hesitation or what had happened a bit earlier.

"Drama... tails." Ned flips the coin and a spark ignites in Tony's eye as Peter looks up at him for a split second.

Danger.... warning... Peter Parker's funeral next week, Tuesday at 6 pm.

The game had stopped a bit later due to people spending too much time in the room. People were leaving, as much as Peter wanted to escape death for another day, Ned wished to stay.

Steve stops him before he leaves the main room. "Hey, that took guts to say no. I'm glad you got out of a situation you didn't feel comfortable in." He pats him on the shoulder like a baseball loving cringey dad.

"Ah.. thanks." It's all he can say, besides who would admit that the entire party made him uncomfortable.

"Now, you better get outta here.. Stark looks like he's gonna kill you, don't fret son.. I'll keep him at bay for a while."

Peter nods, shook at such dank old language. He rushes to find Ned for protection. "We have to leave..." He begs, pouting in the way Ned found irresistible to say no.

"Peter, I'm having some fun.. remember how lame that Liz girl's party was sophomore year? Well this is a huge step up, and they have some hecking great beats poppin."

Peter gags "Stop.. for the love of god stop." He hates it when Ned acts like that. "Can I call May in ten minutes?" He whines and people start staring.

"Don't you dare embarrass me with your pornstar whine, I feel cool for once." He straightens his hat with an affirming nod. "Make it twenty minutes, go talk to some people...maybe meet a girl or whatever you like?" Ned shrugs.

Peter just walks away, annoyed by the fact that he, like everyone else thought he was gay.

It's never like Peter's dated someone, or liked someone in that way. He's turned down tons of girls since fifth grade.He'd been teased about it a ton by children at the playground. It was traumatizing.

Peter could never really confirm if he were gay or not. Until something catches his eye, he's oblivious.

Peter does find a girl, slightly attractive by the window. Was this how it worked? Find someone pleasing to the eye and mention that they are pleasing to look at.

No, it's not, as Peter gets his foot stomped on by her leather boot. Sassy and sarcastic. He walks away to wait outside to call May.

"Parker!"

Oh shittt.

Tony's come outside too, stands glaring at Peter on the steps. "So, I've got a case of paranoia I think you could help me out with."

[brokenmusicboxwolfe]

Catch up....

Hopscotch- A veteran CIA agent gets demoted unjustly to a waste of his talents desk job. He responds by announcing his intent to write a tell all book, and then leads the spies on a merry chase as he sends the completed chapters in. It looks like this fun game can’t have a happy ending....or can it?

This is a film I knew almost nothing about, but that turned out to be a delight. It’s a comedy and a thriller, but not a comedy in the big zany way and not a thriller that has bloodshed (even the bullets that are fired are aimed at unoccupied targets). Lots of fun!

Jabberwocky- A lad from the countryside heads to the city at the local castle to make his fortune and win the hand of his love, despite her distain of him. Meanwhile, the kingdom is being devistated by a giant beastie, but not everyone is eager to stop it. The merchants have actually found the situation hugely profitable, but the dottering king has to do something. The something, so he decides to have all the knights take part  in a battle to the death competition to find someone to send to kill the creature. 

What, send ALL the knights to take on the monster at once? Are you mad? Stories never work like that! 

And generally speaking this does function in traditional style. Our under class hero sets out on that journey for your usual reasons (love, money, proving himself) and has a series of minor adventures before finding himself in the unlikely position of hero. But unlike the typical hero he’s more a Candide type, cluelessly bumbling his way through it all. And let’s just say, not everyone wants that fairy tale happy ending after all. 

I love every Terry Gilliam film I’ve seen (and I’ve seen ‘em all I think!) but I remembered this one as being a lesser one. It was his first solo film, but actually it looks amazing. I started to say gorgeous, but considering the level of filth that would be silly. Narratively it wanders about, but I think I kind of works as part of the deconstruction of the fairy tale, pointing up the absurdity of the hero’s journey. Of course, it does work better if (like me) you are the sort to embrace the moment without concern for where it fits into the story as a whole. And it’s not quite as funny as it might want to be. Still, I think I enjoyed it much, much more on this rewatch!

Mary Poppins- In a household with a uptight workaholic father and a mother into being a suffragette...which for some reason we are supposed to think as silly instead of a heroic activity..... a new nanny is called for because the Bride of Frankenstein (well, the actress played her!) has had enough of the supposedly naughty, but actually completely average, kids. Along floats, literally, a nanny who is smug, arrogant, politeness masking a sense of superiority, and some sort of magic user. She clearly cast a glamour to cause everyone to fall in love with her no matter how cooly judgemental, bossy and ��full of herself she is (seriously, she declares herself “practically perfect in every way”). No sooner has she walked in than she spirits the kids off to a place theor parents couldn’t have found them, just so she can go on a sort of date with her jack of all trades but accent from nowhere boyfriend. She will make life interesting for the family, but has no staying power as an employee.

Alright, I’m going to make a shocking confession: I have never been fond of the movie. 

It’s well made in a lot of ways, I’m not disagreeing. It has catchy songs, lovely ideas (leaping into chalk drawings, floating because of infectious laughter, etc), beautiful visuals (Peter Ellenshaw’s matte paintings....yeah, I’m sad enough to know that off the top if my head! LOL...are dreamily pretty), energetic performances....but I just don’t care much for the film. 

You might have guessed from my description in the summery, I am not fond of the title character. I won’t rant on and on, but will point to the final straw when I was little. The so called heroine denying she has taken the kids on a fanciful trip when they talk about out later just pushed my buttons! Someone telling the truth (the kids) and having that truth denied by someone with more power (by that nanny), or just not being believed, is something that has enraged me since I was tiny. I hadn’t warmed to her before then, but after I had no use for her at all. And, honestly, dislike hadn’t lessened at this rewatch.

I’m not saying that the fact I can’t stand Mary (insert choice profanity) Poppins the character is why I have always been cool to the film and think people that call it “Disney’s Masterpiece” are a bit strange. But it’s certainly part of why I will never, ever understand why it’s one of the most beloved films if the Walt era. 

Still, there are good things about it and it doesn’t make me really angry like a certain other “Disney Classic”. That’s reserved for a film where parents decide that as part of a divorce they should each get one kid and then NEVER TELL THEM that they have an identical twin sibling. Then that unnamed film goes on to suggest that kids actually can get their divorced parents back together and that this is a good thing despite how hideously selfish they were in the way they split up their kids!

Yeah, I’m cool to Mary Poppins, but I HATE The Parent Trap! LOL ***

**For instance, I’m STILL angry about the adults being patronzing asses to Big Bird over Snuffy!! “He’s telling the truth!!!!” They fixed that, but only after they realized kids understood Snuffy was real AND that the lesson that “Grown ups won’t believe you if you tell the truth.” was the lesson kids were getting. Unfortunately, by the. I was no longer in the target demo. 

*** There are a lot of Disney Live Action films I loved growning up. 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, Escape to Witch Mountain, Darby O’Gill and the Little People, Freaky Friday, Treasure Island, The Apple Dumpling Gang, Dr. Syn alias the Scarecrow, The Cat From Outer Space.....it’s just I think I would even rather watch The Black Hole than the two mentioned above....and I came out of the script challenged spectacular grumbling as a child. 

#movies #hopscotch #jabberwocky #mary poppins