#WHERE IS THE COMPETENCY. OR AT THE VERY LEAST COMMON FUCKIN SENSE

[soldier-poet-king]

Fuckin screaming

My boss, after reading the RFP I wrote last week: oh but I didn't think the history section explained the use case well enough [well you didn't give me any info so I was going based on what I could piece together], your appendix didn't include xyz fields [YOU DIDNT TELL ME THEY EXISTED AND I HAD NO WAY TO FIND THAT OUT SINCE y'all aren't even following BASIC RM principles when it's not convenient], what about xyz problem [ITS IN THE FUTURE STATE REQUIREMENTS. DID U NOT FUCKIN READ THEM. THEYRE IN BRIGHT RED FOR A REASON], your questions for the vendor seem too vague, we need specifics and answers in 2 weeks [specifics in what sense??? You haven't laid out a plan for this!!! It's not MY FAULT y'all decided to engage a vendor BEFORE doing an RFP or even OUTLINING THE BARE MINIMUM REQUIREMENTS FOR YOUR PROPOSED SOLUTION. Like ofc it's gonna be weird and clunky YOURE DOING THE WHOLE PROCESS BACKWARDS. AND THE MFING COMMITTEE CANT GIVE ME A SINGLE ANSWER SO IM PULLING FUNCTIONAL REQUIREMENTS OUT OF MY ASS]

NOTABLY she did not comment on the requirements section. Y'know. The actual core and central purpose of this document. The whole reason it was given to ME (the only computer literate archivist in the group) like??? HELLO. Please. Please sit down and tell me what you think the purpose of this document and the process of engaging with a vendor is like. Please. Please tell me how you think ANY of this works, or how you expect it to work on your whack ass timeline

The IT guy?? On the other hand??? I asked him for a second pair of eyes on the technical requirements (BC unlike SOME people I know my fuckin limits and I'm primarily a records manager not a database designer) and he was like oh no it looks great you nailed it and it's exactly the type of document they should be using.

So like. One of the only other ppl in the building who knows what they're talking about agrees with me. He however has the ability and a legitimate reason to recuse himself from this whole shitshow. *I* do not.

#franposting #i am genuinely like so mad rn. #WHERE IS THE COMPETENCY. OR AT THE VERY LEAST COMMON FUCKIN SENSE #OR LIKE #KNOWLEDGE OF HOW THE WORLD WORKS AND BUSINESS PLACES OPERATE #i know we're all la di da in non profit land but like #HELLO??? THIS IS NOT HOW WE ENGAGE TECH COMPANIES MA'AM #nor is it how we get FUNCTIONAL solutions to this ACTUALLY VERY EASY TO SOLVE PROBLEM YALL ARE JUST DUMB #im so mad im not doing ANYTHING else today out of spite #im gonna sit at my desk and listen to the tge audiobook #oh csevet we're really in it now. #truly the fantasy secretary trope appeals to me for so many reasons #but one of the biggest is just. i am a competent organizer and fast learner and logical thinker surrounded by IDIOTS ALWAYS #and its like. wrangling my superiors and higher ups into seeing sense #because they dk what theyre talking about. but you are just a lowly worm so ofc you cant just outright SAY that #you have to coach them qith obsequiousness into thinking they reached the conclusion themselves #bonus points for women not being allowed to be confident and prideful in their capabilities #i am going to fuckin. explode #once again. make me supreme dictator of information management in my workplace or die by my sword

[sylvie--laufeydottir]

an obligatory analysis of sylvie’s character (aka: who betrayed who?)

in case you can’t tell, i like sylvie. but here’s a big fuckin post where i share my thoughts on her role in the finale in a sort of disjointed kind of way.

NOTE: this isn’t about sylki. i don’t ship it personally, but that isn’t really relevant to this at all. this also doesn’t go into the criticisms i have of the show because this isn’t really the place for that. maybe i can do that later, whatever.

also, this is gonna be a long post. i have a lot of thoughts.

sylvie’s introduction and motivations

one of the first things we learn about sylvie is her opposition to the tva. (okay, it’s literally the first thing, whatever.) in episode 3, we get to see her entire plan - overthrow whoever’s running the tva, and... that’s it. loki questions her about the power vacuum that would leave, to which she shows that she’s not interested in running the tva. (this is also stated in ep 2.) her goals are clear. she wants rid of the entire organisation, and doesn’t care about or want the sort of power that would come with pulling the strings.

her reasoning for this seems pretty simple. she doesn’t want the power ruling the tva would entail because she knows what it’s like to be on the other end of that deal. she had everything taken from her as a child, and doesn’t want that to happen to anybody else. she believes that that kind of power belongs to nobody, not even herself.

this easily establishes her as a character who, despite having an ego, has principles that trump everything else. she’s very dedicated to her cause; the ‘never at the expense of the mission’ line in ep 3 just states it out loud. her entire life has been dedicated to this cause. this is a good time to segue into the next section...

sylvie’s personality, character and flaws

she’s fuckin stabby.

despite only really being present for 4 out of the 6 episodes of the show, we manage to get a pretty good idea of sylvie’s personality right from the start thanks to episode 3 being largely a character study with both her and loki. she’s shown as a very competent and strong character - however, contrary to marvel’s guidebook on writing female characters, those aren’t personality traits. what we actually see of her is that she’s very confident, and has a tendency to be rude or dismissive of other people. episode 3 has a bunch of examples of this, but the easiest one to point to is the fireworks scene. after loki does something nice to cheer her up, something which visibly works, her response is to waive it away as ‘not bad’.

her coldness in this scene even after bonding with loki is likely due to her upbringing. sylvie spent the majority of her life, including her childhood, on the run, unable to form relationships with people who weren’t moments away from dying. it feels a bit redundant for me to point this out, but this is, as they say in the medical field, mega fucking traumatic. not only did sylvie not have the opportunity to form these kinds of connections, she couldn’t even develop the ability to form them. loki is a bandaid to cover a bullet hole in this regard, one she needs years to heal from. while she does bond with him to an extent, she is physically unable to trust him to the point where they can be considered close.

another thing we learn about sylvie is that she’s very violent - and that she enjoys it. being a character that grew up running from an organisation that wanted her dead, it makes sense for her first instinct to be confrontational. however, despite having to fight to survive, she visibly takes pleasure from fighting. this was brought up in an interview with sophia (that i am not going to link here, because tumblr is kind of a hellsite and i’m not in the mood for that today). here’s a nice extract instead.

“She's not trained like Loki is,” Di Martino continues. “She can't do some of the flourishes that he would, but she's figured out how to brawl. She's a street fighter and she loves it. That was a really great key to unlocking part of Sylvie for me, was how much she just loves a fight. She knows that she's either going to win, or if she isn't going to win, she'll survive. She's that damaged character who's dangerous because she knows she can survive.”

her tendency towards violence is actually a key part of sylvie’s character. this works as both a strength and a flaw. on the one hand, she’s able to survive scrapes most other characters wouldn’t, and she knows that. she’s not one to freeze in most (note: most) scenarios, because she knows what to expect. on the other hand, violence isn’t always the answer, and she’s very unlikely to consider any other option than a fight.

her enchantment abilities tie into this - they’re another weapon for her to use, and one she’s not afraid to call on. however, her eagerness to enchant people without hesitation puts her in a pretty bad place morally. her enchantment clearly leaves hunter c-20 traumatised, and yet she’s more than willing to enchant people for the sake of the mission. she’s also relatively dismissive of human sentient lives. an early example of this is in episode 2, where loki asks her if the person she had enchanted was dead, to which she responds with a casual ‘they usually survive’. additionally, she’s more than willing to fight the guards on the train in episode 3, despite them seeing her as a threat for completely understandable reasons.

in the case of the guards, her reasoning for placing such little value on their lives is likely that they’re about to die anyways. everyone on lamentis is doomed, so from her point of view, whether they die at her hands or at the hands of the moon from majora’s mask isn’t really important. however, c-20 is a different story. sylvie places next to no value on the lives of the tva’s workers, content to slaughter them en masse for the sake of her goal. this is despite her knowing that every one of the tva workers is a variant plucked from the sacred timeline. this sets up a weird sort of transactional nature in how sylvie views other people - to her, they’re less important than the mission, and she doesn’t hesitate to eliminate threats.

was this a long section? this was a long section. i would like to call back to the fact that this is not a sylki post for this next part. and also to praise anyone that got this far, because fucking hell, is this excessively long or what? who would have the time to write this out?

sylvie’s bond with loki

i want to go back to that whole thing about her relationship with loki. he’s the first person she’s really spoken to since she was a child who isn’t about to face imminent death. furthermore, despite their differences, they have quite a lot in common - enough to hit it off surprising well for two people who kind of want to kill each other. they’re able to relate on common ground like frigga, and even though they clash due to loki’s initial carelessness, they’re overall able to get along well enough aside from occasional bickering. the blanket scene from episode 5 is probably the best example of this. sylvie allows herself, albeit briefly, to be vulnerable around loki.

except, not really. one of the first things she does is tries to ensure he won’t betray her. i’ve seen somebody cite this before as proof that her fondness towards him isn’t real, and that she was planning on betraying him from the start, hence why it was on her mind. that’s definitely possible, but i think it’s far more likely that it’s just her difficulties connecting to people stopping her from feeling safe around him even as they share a nice moment. she really does seem to care about loki - an easy example of this is her asking how he is during episode 4 without being prompted. she’s just unable to properly process these kinds of feelings due to an incomprehensible amount of trauma. as loki puts it, she can’t trust.

and loki can’t be trusted. she knows - or at least, thinks she knows - his nature as a trickster and a villain. loki embodies a part of sylvie that she considers herself completely separate from; the tva-approved liar whose purpose is to bring out the best in others. while she does show him more decency than to treat him like that, at the end of the day, he represents something that makes her deeply uncomfortable, hence her rejection of the loki name. despite what they have in common, loki is an incredibly difficult person to trust, especially for somebody who has deep-rooted trust issues. so, this brings us onto...

who betrayed who?

so, sylvie and loki make it to kang’s castle. after all this time, she’s finally about to reach her life’s goal. she’s clearly nervous - this is out of her comfort zone, unlike most fights. loki reassures her, and they head in. they meet kang, learn the true nature of the tva, have the opportunity to kill him...

and loki stops her.

loki’s motivations are left ambiguous. the uncharitable interpretation is that he wants to rule the tva for himself, as per kang’s offer. he’s expressed such an interest to sylvie before. for the loki we know in avengers 1, this seems perfectly in character.

however, for the loki we’ve seen in the show, there’s a different option. he believes kang’s threat that there are multiple of him, and that killing him won’t solve anything. to him, he isn’t willing to risk unknown horrors for the sake of taking his revenge out on kang. this is the loki who offered diplomacy and guile to counteract sylvie’s brute force.

but sylvie, who can’t trust, assumes the worst.

to her, loki was the one who betrayed her. they had a plan - find whoever pulls the strings, and destroy them. to her, loki’s hesitation isn’t caution, but treachery. taking kang’s offer to rule the tva is exactly what she thinks she should’ve expected from the guy who hurts everybody who loves him. her fight or flight responses kick in, and she chooses the one she always chooses. loki’s attempts to reassure her fall on deaf ears, not just because she doesn’t want to trust him, but because she’s physically incapable of it. she makes the short-sighted decision of brute force, just like she did back on lamentis, because it’s all she’s ever known, and the cause she’s dedicated her life to.

from the outside, it looks like sylvie was the one who betrayed loki, but things look pretty different from where she’s standing.

this is why i take issue with people calling sylvie a ‘villain’ or questioning whether this was her plan for the start. in my opinion, her motivations line up pretty clearly as a creature of habit, one who panics at the first hint of smoke and pushes away the first person she’s been able to bond with for the sake of self-preservation. did she make the wrong decision? unquestionably - the effects of her actions will no doubt plague the multiverse (and the mcu, for us) for as long as they go unchecked. but she made the only decision she was capable of making, and that’s not villainous, just tragic.

conclusion

well, this is a kind of depressing way to finish this post. for what it’s worth, though, i don’t think sylvie is a doomed character. regardless of how brief it was, she did show a real connection with loki. just because something requires a lot of healing doesn’t make it impossible. this is why i like sylvie as a character so much; she’s deeply flawed and complex, but that complexity makes her interesting, and relatable. marvel has a long history of sexy lamps and supposed ‘tortured backstories’, but sylvie is the first time they paid attention to this with their character writing without having to give somebody a wholeass prequel movie. with loki confirmed to appear in multiverse of madness, i’m hoping we see more of sylvie - not as a villain, but as a hero who can overcome her past experiences and rise to better things.

or maybe another kang shows up and kills her immediately. who knows.

#sylvie #sylvie laufeydottir #loki #loki theory #loki analysis #loki series #long post #like really fucking long #i’m so sorry for this #not a gif

[a-panda-reads-act-omega]

ACT OMEGA PART 24

THE 04/02/17 UPDATE

Hey look at that, I’m bored and I can’t urge myself to close that act omega tab. You know what that means. I’m doing another part today, w o o o o o 

Alrighty, last time. Aranea showed up, and I reacted in a perfectly calm and orderly fashion. Let’s see where this goes!

Yup. Nobody’s happy. Put that grin away Aranea.

MEENAH: serket?? MEENAH: HOLD the GLUB up MEENAH: i thought you like MEENAH: got owned or w/e

She did indeed get owned or w/e. By you, in fact. You from another universe in which you became a giant hot troll wearing a goddamn skintight outfit.

Oh yeah, and she is currently destroying the hell out of the kiddo’s back at the lily pad.

ARANEA: ... Nice to see you too, Meenah.

Pssst.. it’s not nice to see you aranea...

ARANEA: Just as anxious to get to the point as ever. 8ut as per usual, I encourage you to exercise a 8it more p8tience. ARANEA: All your questions and concerns will be addressed eventually, I assure you. MEENAH: UUUGH MEENAH: i cannot B-ELI-EV-E this MEENAH: you go all crazy and try n pull off some ridiculous timeline divine intervention stunt MEENAH: prolly kelped actin like a hotshot all the way up to getting fuckin WAST-ED MEENAH: im out here thinkin i aint never gonna sea you again cause you got it in your head you had ta be the ultimate magnanimous blowhard just like your STUPID ALT S)(-ELLF MEENAH: AND T)(-EN MEENAH: you reappier outta NOW)(-ER-E MEENAH: lookin just as smug as you got no business bein MEENAH: and you tell me i gotta put up with whatever sanctimonious salmon youve prepared before i get any answers?!

LET ‘ER HAVE IT MEENAH. Can Aranea get the idea out of her head that SHE has got to be the one everybody looks up to? Because everytime she’s had an effect on this story, it’s made everything completely horrible. Honestly, she just tries too hard to be worthy of admiration. If she were like Vriska, she’d care more about doing what needs to be done instead of being admired by all. Merely because Vriska isn’t so dependent on the approval of others, and is happy with doing what needs to be done just so she can brag to herself and others. Alright, I kinda feel like getting deeper into this. How Vriska and Aranea differ and parallel eachother, because it’s a pretty thin line that doesn’t feel obvious. But here’s a very simple way of putting it:

Vriska wants to be the hero Aranea wants to be seen as the hero

Vriska wants to force dead weight to carry itself Aranea wants useful people to depend on her

I feel like that sums it up fairly well, really. Maybe I’ll start making sideposts of character analysis if I feel like getting deeper into these topics.

ARANEA: Sanctimonious what? MEENAH: OH MY COD I M-EANT S-ERMON

GET MAD MEENAH. IMPALE HER WITH YOUR POKEY FORK.

And here we find Porrim, in her natural state of “tired of everybodys shit”

PORRIM: Meenah. Yo+u might want to+ reel yo+urself in for a mo+ment.

S)(-ELL NO

MEENAH: >38( PORRIM: Maybe try to+ avo+id making the same mistakes as the yo+unger Serket.

DONT BRING VRISKA INTO THIS 

VRISKA: Excuse me???????? PORRIM: O+h, hush. Yo+u’ve spent far mo+re energy externalizing yo+ur frustratio+n than you+ have do+ing anything pro+ductive. PORRIM: We can o+nly take so+ much o+f this. We're here to+ try and do+ so+mething with o+ur afterlife o+ther than willfully subject o+urselves to+ its infinite echo+ chamber o+f teenage drama.

Porrim

porrim, baby

i love you, i do

but this is n o T JUST TEENAGE DRAMA? I mean, Aranea killed EVERYBODY.

PORRIM: I myself have had eno+ugh o+f that fo+r at least two+ lifetimes. PORRIM: So+ if either o+f yo+u are ultimately o+nly go+ing to co+ntribute to+ the endless caco+phany, rather than fo+cus o+n getting results, I suggest yo+u mo+ve it to+ so+me o+ther bubble. PORRIM: If no+t, then co+nsider jo+ining the rest o+f us in seeing what Aranea might have to+ o+ffer to+ o+ur cause. ARANEA: Why, thank you, Porrim. That was very eloquently put. I promise you won’t 8e disappointed. ::::)

Goddammit Porrim, you gave her a reason to be smug. Just because Porrim is tired of the arguing, doesn’t mean you’re somehow at all justified in anything you’ve ever done ever.

ok im salty

PORRIM: Hmmm. We’ll see. ARANEA: Really, I was well prepared for my reappearance to cause something of a stir. It’s completely understanda8le to want an explan8tion.

UUUUUGHHhfadjnkms SHuuut uppp

ARANEA: I’ve 8een lying low for quite a while now. Gathering inform8tion, drawing conclusions, revising and perfecting plans... All of which will certainly prove invalua8le for you all in your current predicament! ARANEA: It really is a shame you’ve landed yourselves in such a 8ind! It was ultim8ly inevita8le, 8ut unfortun8 all the same. ARANEA: Isn’t it lucky, then, that I’m here to put this tr8n 8ack on its tracks?

Im gonna die from salt poisoning help

PORRIM: SIGH...

SIGH...

PORRIM: If yo+u have any interest in keeping that pro+mise o+f yo+urs, I suggest yo+u skip the preamble.

Thank you Porrim. I’m trying to find somebody to latch onto here, but everybody is starting problem’s n s t uf f . 

Everybody looks so

VRISKA: Hold the fucking phone! Why should we listen to ANYTHING you have to say?

YOU sHOULDN’T

VRISKA: Your track record isn’t exactly stellar! And from what I’m seeing right now, you haven’t learned from your colossal fuckup one iota!

WOAH, VASKA... who the hell says iota????

VRISKA: I have a8solutely ZERO interest in letting the same washed up has-8een whose mess *I* had to clean up waltz up here and act like she’s my goddamn s8vior!!!!!!!

YEAH TELL HER VRISKA! EVEN THOUGH IM PREEETTY SURE YOU DID NOTHING AND TEREZI DID EVERYTHING...

And, oh god my memory of the timelines and stuff are getting me confused. I’m sure I’m probably wrong about this, but y’know what I’m gonna talk about it anyways. Would this Vriska really even know about Aranea? I mean, she didn’t die, so... maybe just in her dreams or something. or. gdi im confused.

ARANEA: Come now, Vriska. You of all people should know that there are 8etter times to choose for throwing hissyfits!

This isn’t a HISSYFITS. This is clear and rational thought. And I don’t get w hY NOBODY ELSE IS QUESTIONING THESE THINGS.

ARANEA: And 8esides, what a8out your little plan? We can all pl8nly see how well that turned out. You were smacked down just as unceremoniously as I was, so don’t act as if you’re suddenly the only person who can pull their own w8 around here.

Yeah, but you know what? Her plan didn’t revolve around dooming EVERYBODY. Her plan had essence of COMPETENCE.

ARANEA: You may 8e incredibly stu88orn, 8ut you can’t 8e so foolish as to dismiss common sense purely for the s8ke of your ego. I’m your 8est shot at m8king it out of this alive. While your army was 8eing eradic8ed, I was 8usy uncovering the truth. ARANEA: If you would just allow me to expl8n, perhaps you could finally reg8n your wits and 8e a8le to focus on what TRULY matters.

oh god i hate her h e l p.

pLEASE.. DOUBle DEATh HER.

VRISKA: I already HAVE my wits! And I was just a8out to use them to whip this 8unch of losers into sh8pe 8efore YOU and your 8loated delusions of grandeur showed up! ARANEA: Is that what you were a8out to do? I never would have guessed. Considering from my perspective, you were in the middle of some sort of mental 8reakdown 8rought on 8y 8eing utterly incapa8le of comprehending the magnitude of your own failure!

At least she DAMAGED HIM. SHE INFLICTED SOME FORM OF HARM TO THE UNKILLABLE GOD TRYING TO FUCK THEM OVER. You literally just got everybody killed with no positive result, you cannot claim that you are A N Y better than her.

ARANEA: If you had been p8ying attention, you might have t8ken note of when I mentioned that this outcome was inevita8le. There was hardly anything I could have done to prevent it. YOU, on the other hand... ARANEA: The mishap with your dice could easily have 8een avoided if you had simply realized how thoroughly outmatched you were. Did you actually try your little luck-stealing trick on LORD ENGLISH?

FIRST THE  F U C K OF ALL... If this outcome was inevitable, then that literally makes EVERYBODY IN PARADOX SPACE JUST AS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS DISASTER. NNGH YOU CANNOT PIN THIS ON VRISKA JUST TO MAKE YOURSELF LOOK BETTER

VRISKA: Yeah! I did!!!!!!!! That’s kind of what I DO? VRISKA: 8ut... it didn’t WORK. ARANEA: Tsk, tsk. Of course it didn’t. Lord English is hardly on the same level as the 8lack king, or the myriad low-level imps, hapless trolls, and pitiful ghosts from which you’d previously acquired your ill-gotten fortune. Your a8ilities aren’t even close to developed enough to stand a chance against such an opponent! ARANEA: 8ut say, I think that perhaps we can strike a deal. We all know that time has 8een kinder to me in that I’ve had enough of it to refine my powers considera8ly. 8etween the two of us, I am clearly the superior Hero of Light.

. . . . . . . . F U C K Y O U .

Can’t deal with this. Can’t TAKE this girl’s superiority complex.

God im turning into the human equivallent of a salt shaker.

VRISKA: Oh, yeah. Sure. 8ecause I’m totally interested in whatever 8ogus “deal” you have to offer. Especially when you phrase it like THAT! ARANEA: And yet you don’t deny truth of my words. A smart choice. VRISKA: Are you going to w8ste time gloating, or actually get to the point?! ARANEA: My point is that I would 8e more than happy to lend you my services. Allow you to maximize your potential in a more... expedient fashion, given the sizea8le constraints we are currently under. ARANEA: All you would have to do is ask nicely. May8e even apologize for raising your voice? A little more respect and deference would 8e appreci8ed as well. ARANEA: What do you say? A deal is a deal? ::::)

GOD. DAMN IT I CANNOT DEAL WITH THIS. I REALLY REALLY R E A L L Y HATE HER. NOBODY WANTS YOUR HELP. Oh god this is turning into the worst liveblog ever, B U T SERIOUSLY I HATE HER AND THAT IS LITERALLY ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT RIGHT NOW.

VRISKA: How a8out this: I DON’T NEED YOUR HELP!!!!!!!!

YEs. PRECISELY 

OHFUCKHIKANKRI

KANKRI: *PHWEEEEEEEET!!!*

...

O k you know what. For once, I’m actually happy about Kankri existing. That fuckfest needed to end.

And jesus. I need to calm myself down.

Oh god poor Mituna is freaking out.

KANKRI: I think that is QUITE en9ugh 9f that f9r n9w. While I n9rmally endeav9r t9 enc9urage c9nstructive de6ate in the interest 9f inf9rming the ign9rant masses, this argument has 6ec9me far t99 pr96lematic f9r me t9 all9w it t9 c9ntinue!

Gdi I haven’t even read it yet, but it already hurts to look at.

Alright. So yeah, this is getting out of hand and he’s putting a stop to it with his space jesus powers.

KANKRI: There isn’t nearly en9ugh time f9r me t9 g9 9ver all 9f the deeply distur6ing c9mments disparaging n9t 9nly the magically disadvantaged, 6ut the mentally challenged, which I have just 69re witness t9. S9 I will settle with 6riefly chastising y9u 69th f9r y9ur cavalier disregard 9f y9ur inherent privilege, and enc9urage y9u to 6e m9re aware 9f h9w the nature 9f y9ur w9rds might affect the very imp9rtant feelings 9f pe9ple that aren’t here.

And people that ARE here. Like, you know. The mentally challenged Mituna right behind you. Though I’m pretty sure you’re speech his having a worse affect on him than they are. Also, how the hell did they even offend any mentally challenged people??

LATULA: ummmmmm, l1k3, not to b3 UN-r4d or wh4t3v3r, b3c4us3 th4t 1s TOT3S not my styl3, LATULA: but m1tun4 1s l1k3, R1GHT h3r3??

Thank you Latula, the poor guy is dying at all these words.

KANKRI: He is?

Oh my god Kankri, seriously? Were you too busy ogling at Latula to realize that their were handicapped people who needed defending in the area?

MITUNA: 1 H4T3 Y0UR FUCK1NG W157L3 KANKRI: 9h. Right, 9f c9urse. My mistake. Ap9l9gies, Mituna. I h9pe y9u d9n’t mind that I have taken it up9n myself t9 help speak 9n y9ur behalf, c9nsidering y9ur vari9us issues with speaking at all.

kANKRI. that is not how you speak to handicapped people. Is he just salty that he’s dating Latula? Yeah. he’s totally salty about latula.

MITUNA: UM KANKRI: Exactly. Y9u’ve 6een rendered n9n-ver6al 6y the sens9ry 9verl9ad caused 6y all this unnecessary sh9uting. Which makes the wh9le thing w9rse, really. Right, Mituna? MITUNA: WHY 4R3 7HR33 S0 M4NY W0RD5 MITUNA: 175 4LL MITUNA: 8UZZ1NG LATULA: dont worry 4bout 1t b4b3! 1ts 4lmost ov3r. MITUNA: 5H0U71NG 4ND MITUNA: 5TUP1D 8ULG3 WH1FF1NG WH157L35 MITUNA: FUCK

Latula is literally the best supportive girlfriend. Is she gonna cover his ears for him next?

KANKRI: Even m9re sincere ap9l9gies, Mituna. Even if the use 9f the whistle was vital in the c9nstructi9n 9f y9ur safe space, I understand that it did upset y9u and that y9ur feelings 9n the matter are valid. KANKRI: 6ut thankfully, and despite the unf9rtunate side effects, it did its j96 9f helping 6ring every9ne t9 their senses. KANKRI: Really, this wh9le thing c9uld have 6een av9ided if y9u 69th had just listened t9 P9rrim's advice. PORRIM: O+h. PORRIM: Kanny, did yo+u just... AGREE with me fo+r o+nce? KANKRI: ... KANKRI: I 6elieve I have asked y9u several times n9w n9t t9 call me that!

what has this devolved into? What is this BICKERING. Can anybody remain on the same page for more than two sentences? Honestly, I’m surprised Lord English hasn’t just killed them all yet.

AND HERE THESE TWO ARE, indifferent as always.

SOLLUX: (well.) SOLLUX: (this is pr0bably the worst clusterfuck i have ever had the f0rtune 0f n0t seeing.) SOLLUX: (are y0u sure we can’t just leave?) SOLLUX: (as if whichever smug fuck that ends up running the idi0t brigade is g0ing to s0lve 0ur impending d00m. it’s alm0st starting t0 feel like the wh0le pirate crew bullshit all 0ver again.) SOLLUX: (except s0meh0w even m0re 0f a catastr0phe.)

Sollux, there’s one thing you’re forgetting. The pirate ship was a disaster, yes. but now you have one KEY FACTOR that will lead you all to victory. The power of F R I E N D S H I P. Can’t you just feel all the good vibes radiating off of these assholes?

ARADIA: (we cant go yet sollux!) ARADIA: (i have no intention of leaving) ARADIA: (and while i understand why you may want to this time it really is somewhat imperative that you stay) ARADIA: (we all have a part to play in the preservation of reality) ARADIA: (a mission which is even more critical now than it has ever been!)

Alright, so this team’s objective “SAVE REALITY” Team lilypad’s objective “DONT.. DIE” Team Lowas’s objective “THERAPIZE ERISOL”

SIMPLE ENOUGH.

oh god i just remembered Calliope already died and that’s s A  D ...

SOLLUX: (ugh. really?) ARADIA: (yes!) SOLLUX: (s0 i’m like. imp0rtant s0meh0w?) ARADIA: (does it help you feel better to think about it like that?) SOLLUX: (... kind 0f? bizarrely en0ugh.) SOLLUX: (where did that c0me fr0m all 0f a sudden?) ARADIA: (i couldnt possibly tell you) ARADIA: (but what i can tell you is that i think this brief setback will be over soon) SOLLUX: (fine, if y0u say s0.)

All setbacks can be overcome with enough  TIME. HAHA.... TIME JOKE. The hell am i doing with my life.

Oh shit is Davepeta here to drop some calm bombs on the group?

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < man this is just getting sad DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < but guess i oughta toss my two cents into this clusterfuck DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < beclaws honestly i KIND of agr33 with vwiskers a little? DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < my subconscious is clawing at me that we totally cant trust aranea at all ever

THANK, you. 

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < cause shes seriously bad news DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < i dont have any real concrete memories or anything to support it but DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < i dunno! thats just how i f33l DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < meow on the other paw DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < we kind of are in some purrty hot water DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < and i ALSO have the conflicting f33ling that whatever info she has fur us will be impurrtant DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < so if anything we should just hear her out DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < so long as you dont try to pull anything fishy!!

SIGH... I G U E S S. It still feels horrible to even let her get a word in, just because she’s literally gonna act like every useful information she gives is worth everything, and they have no right to blame her for anything.

ARANEA: Er... ARANEA: Thank you for the endorsement. And the warning, I suppose. ARANEA: If there won’t 8e any further interruptions? MEENAH: yeah sure fine whatever MEENAH: but u beta believe im gonna be gilling you later ARANEA: I look forward to it.

I’m gonna hope that was a fish pun, and what she meant was ‘killing’

TAVROS: i THINK VRISKA LOOKS LIKE, sHE IS READY TO STOP SHOUTING, TAVROS: sO WE CAN BEGIN LISTENING, TAVROS: wHICH IS GOOD, bECAUSE I AM VERY CURIOUS, TAVROS: eSPECIALLY SINCE, i SORT OF, aLWAYS LIKED YOUR STORIES, aRANEA, TAVROS: wHEN THEY DIDN’T RUN TOO LONG, aNYWAY,,,

N O B O D Y A S K E D Y O U  T A V R O S

putthatfuckingsmileaway

ARANEA: Don’t worry, Tavros. I will try and keep this as 8rief as possible. ARANEA: While also ensuring all vital inform8tion and context is provided, of course. ARANEA: Now, allow me to 8egin...

...gjdkgfignjfij

conflicting feelings about everything here. Alright. WELL, that is the end of this update. you can listen to my whine a bunch on the next part. SO. yeah.

#homestuck #homestuck liveblog #Act Omega #hs act omega #act omega liveblog #hs act omega liveblog

[mintflavoredwindows]

A Really Long “Shinon/Gatrie Is at Least a Little Real and I Really Like It” Meta Post Thing

I just wanna talk about my Big Tellius Ship that I have trouble finding content for lmao, sorry to anyone who's seeing this post on mobile.  I got carried away!!!

So Shinon and Gatrie.  In PoR they get introduced together, they first leave the party together, they have a Really Good support, and just generally they have a lot of good interactions and are really tight.  I also have a hard time finding shippy content for them, I'm not 100% sure why??  There's some good shit out there for them but it feels like they would be more popular?  I mean, it's not like I don't have my own fic in the works for them, but I'm a lot better at just talkin shit like this than doing Serious Writing so this is gonna be Publishable WAY earlier, despite being way longer.

I was originally gonna go through a bunch of their interactions (especially their PoR supports) through the lens of Someone Who Ships Them and talk about why I like their dynamic and I think they work romantically, but this kinda turned into... a HUGE fuckin meta about both of them as characters and how they relate to each other + other characters.  I mean, it's hard to do the ship talk without the character talk.  I haven't actually played RD yet and I only know a few things about Shinon and Gatrie in that game, so if there's anything big to talk about there, I'm probably gonna miss it!  Thankfully, there's A Lot just in their PoR stuff.

So starting with their introduction at the end of Chapter 2, we're off to A Start. Shinon gets a really cool entrance where he fires some ridiculous shot and saves Rolf's life and then brags about it and demands that people thank him for it (spoiler: They don't), while Gatrie just kinda... barely arrives while sweating his ass off, complains that Titania and Shinon almost left him behind when they KNOW his armor is MASSIVE and impossible to run in (everyone ignores him), and claims that his running and sweating qualifies as hard work.  Now that I'm looking back at it, these are actually really effective introductions to their characters: Shinon as a guy who's real fuckin good at what he does but is a Raging Douche, and Gatrie as a generally good guy who gets memed on a bit and you feel bad for him buuut at the same time, he... manages to come across as a little bit of a tool too, even if he seems more pleasant than Shinon does.

We haven't even seen him try to flirt yet.

So in their first appearance, Shinon and Gatrie don't really interact with each other, you don't really directly get the sense that they're friends beyond the fact that they're introduced at the same time.  Actually, everyone just kind of ignores both of them??  Really in hindsight, I don't blame Shinon for feeling kinda underappreciated.  It's not until Chapter 3 that we find out that they work jobs together a lot, often enough that they have a name for their teamed fighting style:

Gatrie: “Ho, Deputy Commander! You want standard thunder and lightning maneuvers here?”Ike: “Er…Thunder and lightning?” Gatrie: “Yeah! I crash into ’em like thunder, and Shinon rains arrows down on ’em like lightning!”

Or Gatrie does anyway.  No one else makes reference "thunder and lightning" ever (Titania just says the plan "sounds good") and honestly I can picture him coming up with that and thinking it sounds So Cool and trying to make it A Thing.

After the chapter is completed, we see that Shinon and Gatrie are either 1.) definitely closer to each other than they are to the other Greil Mercenaries and that they have some priorities in common or 2.) really close friends and that Titania at least is really aware of this.  I'm gonna start with the first one because that's the scenario most people are gonna get (it's a little early in the game to be losing units).

So after clearing the pirates out of town, the mayor thanks the Greil Mercenaries, but suggests that they could make better pay in other positions.  They're really competent for a bunch of rando mercenaries defending a town from rando pirates.  Titania gets a little defensive over it, but it prompts this conversation if Shinon and Gatrie are both alive:

Shinon: “Pah! Jobs like this barely make a dent in my incurable boredom! It’s like that old buzzard said, there’s better work out there. Something with a bit of challenge.” Titania: “Shinon!” Shinon: “I’m joking. J-O-K-ing.” Gatrie: “Come, Titania. Be honest. Don’t you find the work we do to be a bit…disheartening? Unglamorous?” Titania: “What? You too, Gatrie? What’s gotten into you?” Gatrie: “Please! Look, we’re not a band of money-hungry recruits. We’re professionals, and we’re very good at what we do. Shinon and I have discussed this at length. All of this mundane mercenary work is unworthy of us. We’re wasting our talents.” Titania: “I see. You’re telling me that you think Commander Greil is mismanaging us. Do I have that right?” Gatrie: “Whoa! Hold it right there! That’s not what I’m saying at all!” Ike: “What is it, Titania?” Titania: “What’s what?” Ike: “You seem so angry. It’s not like you.” Titania: “Hmph…” Gatrie: “Exactly! Ike’s got the right of it!” Titania: “It’s just that I…Look, we do good work, and we help people. I want you to be proud of that. I felt like you were saying work that doesn’t bring fame and fortune isn’t worth doing, that’s all. Sorry.” Gatrie: “No…you’re right. We are the ones who ought to apologize.”

So there's a bit going on here.  This is obvious foreshadowing for Shinon and Gatrie being the ones who bail on the Greil Mercenaries after Greil's death to look for better work.  We also have Shinon starting some shit and Gatrie being the one to finish it, mostly by panicking at Titania's pushback and apologizing (not that Shinon doesn't do his own immediate backpedaling by brushing his comment off as a joke before Gatrie starts arguing on his behalf).  We can see that Shinon and Gatrie have similar priorities, ranking fame and fortune higher than the other Greil Mercenaries seem to, and Gatrie's mention of them discussing the subject at length (which Titania doesn't seem to have been aware of) makes it seem like they're definitely closer to each other than they are with the rest of the company.  I'd say that this exchange, plus the thunder and lightning thing, are really what establish Shinon and Gatrie as sort of a unit within the Greil Mercenaries.  After apologizing for stepping out of line, Gatrie is perfectly willing to concede the point to Titania and move on to a celebratory meal.  Shinon, on the other hand...

Shinon: “Pah. I’m surrounded by idealistic fools. What’s so wrong with fame? What’s wrong with having money to live well?”

He doesn't actually apologize for his "joke" and was, as it turns out, a little more serious about what he was saying than Gatrie was. Also, for all that somebody has Provoke as a default skill and is known to be foul-tempered and ready to fight, somebody sure does back down quickly when he's mildly rebuked/challenged!  Especially considering he wasn't joking at all!  There's probably another meta out there that interprets this as evidence that Shinon has a romantic thing for Titania and like, Okay Fair Enough, but that's not what this meta is, so I'm just gonna say it indicates that Shinon does care about Titania's opinion/Titania in general (as most of their few interactions do; they def respect each other and like each other as people) and that when he seriously steps on someone's toes who he really does care about, he's pretty quick to try to patch things up or change the subject.  Effective?  Maybe not so much. Anyway, Shinon and Gatrie are more in sync with each other than they are with the rest of the squad, but they're def not totally in sync!! (Which is good tbh, the world couldn't take more than one Shinon or more than one Gatrie I think)  This is reflected further down the line when Gatrie returns as an Other Unit before being re-recruited and expresses regret over abandoning his old company so quickly if Ike talks to him after he's back, while Shinon shows up as a straight-up enemy who taunts most of his old companions in battle conversations and needs to be defeated under really specific circumstances in order to not go down fighting, and even then, he demands that Ike duel him for leadership of the Greil Mercenaries if he's gonna come back to the company. But I'm getting ahead of myself, I gotta talk about the Sad Versions of this chapter end:

Shinon: “Hey, Captain. I’m gonna take off for a while.” Titania: “That’s no problem. We have nothing scheduled until tomorrow afternoon. Take what time you need.” Shinon: “Yeah. I’ll do that.” Ike: “Where’s Shinon going?” Titania: “He needs some time alone. Usually, I make everyone report in, but…with what happened to Gatrie today…” Ike: “I see.” Titania: “No matter how many times it happens, you never get used to losing a friend. Ike, this is…This is the world we mercenaries live in. Never lose sight of that one, cold truth.”

Gatrie: “Titania? I’d…um…like to take off for a while. Is that a problem?” Titania: “No. No problem. There’s nothing scheduled until tomorrow afternoon. Take your time.” Gatrie: “Thanks.” Ike: “Where’s Gatrie going?” Titania: “He needs some time alone. Usually, I make everyone report in, but…with what happened to Shinon…” Ike: “I see.” Titania: “No matter how many times it happens, you never get used to losing a friend. Ike, this is…this is the world we mercenaries live in. Never lose sight of that one, cold truth.”

Okay, so it admittedly doesn't take much to make me upset but this Makes Me Upset.  Shinon and Gatrie are close enough that if one dies, the other feels that they need to request some time off to grieve... and Titania recognizes that they def need it.  Shinon does this kind of posturing where he basically tells Titania he's taking the time off whether it's okay or not, but her convo with Ike makes it obvious that she sees through it.  He's actually pretty distraught about losing Gatrie?  Gatrie, as usual, is a little more upfront about his actual emotional state (the "um" kills me fsr??) and seems pretty subdued compared to most of his other dialogue.  Still, he doesn't actually have to say what's up for it to be obvious (to Titania, who definitely knows both of them better than Ike does) that he's broken up about Shinon dying.  Even though these conversations p much signal the end of any Shinon-Gatrie interactions for the playthrough they show up in, they make it obvious that they're really close friends who definitely care about each other on a level beyond "guy whose priorities are kinda similar to mine and we chill sometimes."  This also establishes that even though Gatrie is definitely more open with his feelings than Shinon is, neither of them is really... good with discussing deep stuff. Granted, it's hard to get deeper/harder to talk about than coping with the death of someone you really care about, but it's an indication that either of them might gloss over what they're really feeling when things get emotionally dicey.

There's not a whole lot to comment on in Chapter 4, but after pulling Shinon to be part of Ike's squad, Greil immediately picks Gatrie too.  I'm gonna quote it, not really because it's significant to anything, but just because I love it when Shinon gets memed on like this:

Shinon: “Commander, you must be joking! He’s just a boy, and he’s had barely more than a taste of battle. What do you expect a whelp like him to accomplish?” Greil: “Ah, Shinon. Since you’re so concerned, you can go as well.” Shinon: “Wait, that’s not what I… Blast.” Greil: “Who else…Gatrie, Rhys, and Soren. That should do.”

Shinon really really hates having Ike in charge of anything, huh.  Granted, if I kept getting passed over for recognition and stuff for a 17-year-old, I'd probably be pretty miffed too??

Another note, I'm probably gonna get on Gatrie's case for being sort of oblivious later on, but he's not totally unobservant.  He's the default character to notice Daein troops approaching in this chapter if all units are still alive.  He's also the one who notices the affilation of the dead soldiers if Rhys isn't around to  do it:

Titania: “Are they Crimean?” Gatrie: “I don’t think so. Look at that black armor, Ike. The vast majority of the dead are Daein soldiers.”

After the battle, he's also the only one who's paying attention to what Shinon's up to.

Gatrie: “I don’t know…Taking out these Daein soldiers may have been a bad move. Um…Hey, Shinon? What are you doing?” Shinon: “This swine’s got some nice weapons. Besides, he ain’t gonna complain. He won’t need them where he’s going.”

Shinon's a catch, huh.  Also, he calls Soren judgmental when he tells to him to "steal from the dead on [his] own time."  Yeah, Shinon, that's definitely being judgmental.

Moving on to Chapter 5, Shinon and Gatrie come down on different sides of the Elincia debate... kind of:

Greil: “Shinon? Gatrie?” Shinon: “Soren’s a pompous, superior whelp, but he’s got the right idea. Besides, the destination’s Gallia, so it’s a moot question. I don’t care how much we get paid; there’s no way under the sun I’m going to stinking beast country.” Gatrie: “Princess Elincia…She does possess a certain regal beauty… There’s a lot to be said for that, you know. However I do prefer country girls…A bit cuter, and not quite so standoffish…Oh! Forget I said that.Whatever you decide is good for me, Commander. Yep, uh-huh, yep…”

Again, they end up paired together when Greil asks for their opinions.  They really are kind of a unit within the group? Also, I'm surprised it's even this deep into the game before we get our first reference to Gatrie being kind of a womanizer, considering that becomes his Primary Character Quirk.  I'll talk more about how Gatrie flirts (It's Bad) and how I think that plays out in his relationship with Shinon later when I talk about their support conversations. For now, I'll say that Gatrie just... says whatever he's thinking sometimes, huh. Like he seems to know that the stuff he's saying is irrelevant to the issue at hand and also that it's stuff that the others probably aren't particularly interested in hearing, but he just... keeps on goin.  I will admit that "cute" and "not quite so standoffish" aren't really things I'd describe Shinon as, but Shinon is definitely less standoffish with people he's close to.  He's not particular nice in this scene, but Gatrie really really does not seem to mind:

Greil: “Open your ears and listen. Listen! All of you.” Boyd:“Huh?…What is it?” Gatrie: “Uh…I don’t hear a thing…” Shinon: “Idiot! That’s the problem. Don’t you think that’s a bit odd? Complete silence, in all four directions.” Gatrie: “Oh, so that’s what you’re talking about!”

Really, Gatrie seems to have no problem brushing it off most of the time when Shinon's being p damn harsh.  I'd argue that Shinon doesn't really mean the vast majority of the rude shit he says, especially jumping all the way to his PoR epilogue dialogue, after the war is over and everything is said and done:

Shinon: “…Bah. I suppose you want some kind of congratulations now, right? Well, too bad. You’re a snot-nosed whelp, and I’m still better than you. Don’t ever forget that.”

Awww, how sweet.  Seriously though, he's smiling when he says this and it's in the middle of a whole bunch of people congratulating Ike on ending a fucking war and affirming how much he means to them.  There is absolutely no way in hell he actually means this, he just can't bring himself to tell Ike that he did a good job.  He's too caught up in his fucking jackass persona to have a nice moment with anyone who isn't Rolf or Gatrie, as we'll get to, and even there he has some trouble.

At the end of the chapter, Shinon and Gatrie get paired together on another mission:

Greil: “Titania! Take Shinon and Gatrie and make sure we have a secure road from here to the great forest. We’ll make our way to Gallia through the sea of trees.”

Ditto with the intro to the next chapter:

Greil: “All right, let’s split up. The diversionary team will be Gatrie, Shinon, and me. The rest of you guard Princess Elincia and proceed to Gallia straightaway. Got it?” Ike: “Are you sure you’re taking enough men?” Shinon: “Idiot pup. Smaller numbers mean better mobility. Your time would be better spent worrying about yourself than about us.” Ike: “…”

Greil has Shinon and Gatrie working together A LOT near the beginning of the game.  I'm not skipping over anything where they get sent on different assignments??  They do work well together combat-wise (in theory, at least, because in my experience, enemies CONSTANTLY ignore Gatrie and his good good Def stat in favor of mobbing Shinon who can't take it as well because he has Provoke on him and I can't bring myself to take it off) and they're good at dealing with each other's personalities and quirks, but holy shit Greil Does Not Separate Them.  We even see some more of this in Rhys and Titania's C-support a little later on, which also gives us another example of how Shinon tries really really hard to pretend like he doesn't care about anyone when that is def not the case:

Titania: "Yeah, those bandits were a rough lot... Their stomping ground was right near your village, actually. It's all coming back to me now... They were tougher than I'd thought. We took most of them out with ease, but one fled into the woods and I gave chase. Big mistake. My horse got hung up in the undergrowth, and that bandit got the drop on me... At least Shinon hit him before I was killed." Rhys: "Gatrie and Shinon were both really worried when they brought you back to my parents' house." Titania: "Really? I didn't know that. Hmm... I didn't think Shinon ever worried about anyone... But they stayed with me until my wounds were healed, I remember that.”

Before splitting off from the group though, Shinon arguably calls Gatrie delicate (in a sympathetic way):

Gatrie: “Blazes, why does it have to be so blamed humid? If we weren’t being chased, I’d strip off this armor here and now!” Titania: “Then I’m almost glad that we ARE being pursued. I suppose you’ll have to grin and bear it, won’t you?” Gatrie: “Hm, I suppose I will.” Titania: “Right. So enough of your griping. You’re merely wasting energy. Still, this heat is appalling.” Shinon: “Dense forests such as these are not made for us delicate humans. The sub-humans love ’em, though.”

Granted, EVERYONE is complaining about the humidity (sidenote, I love Titania and I love her comeback to Gatrie saying he wants to Disrobe, it's iconic), but it does come across as Shinon backing Gatrie up on this one.

When Greil's party meets up with Ike's, Shinon and Gatrie have a little lore convo and then immediately get sent off on another assignment together:

Gatrie: “Shinon… What are these 'twisted games' the boss is talking about?” Shinon: “There’s rumor that King Daein gathers strong men from around the continent and sets them to fight one another. Those who live, regardless of their birth, are given influential positions. Don’t know if it’s true, though.” Gatrie: “Oh…So that weird dame’s got her eye on the boss now, does she?” Greil: “Shinon! Gatrie! I’ll distract the woman. You two grab Ike and the others and get out of here now!” Shinon: “Got it!” Gatrie: “But, Commander! We can’t leave you here on your own!” Shinon: “Idiot! That woman’s no threat to the commander. All right, come on! Let’s go!”

Gatrie's phrasing re: Petrine is so surreal to me... "That weird dame"... "Got her eye on the boss"... Like Shinon just told him about this fucked-up-if-true thing and it almost sounds like all he got out of it is that Petrine is like... interested in Greil??  Like I definitely think he's bi, but heteronormativity is one hell of a thing, especially where Gatrie's concerned.

Reuniting with Ike, Gatrie is happy to see him and gets emotional, while Shinon is... Shinon interacting with Ike.

Ike: “Gatrie!” Gatrie: “Hey, is that you, Ike? I heard you got the princess to Gallia. Nice work! You’re quite the hero. …But wait! So what in blazes are you doing back here?” Ike: “You’ll think it foolish, but I was worried about all of you.” Gatrie: “Aww…You’re going to make me cry, you silly pup! All right…sniff… Get it together, Gatrie. Tonight, you and I will share a meal sing a song or two!”

Ike: “Well met, Shinon. Are you unharmed?” Shinon: “Do I look injured? I’m as fit as ever. You must be disappointed Daein hasn’t stuck me full of holes yet.” Ike: “…” Shinon: “Guess it’s time to tighten our belts and move on. Now that I’m gonna be dragging your worthless carcass around again, I'll have to work twice as hard.”

"..." is about right, Ike. Shinon is really REALLY sure that the dislike is totally mutual (or wants it to be fsr?) when it really, really isn't.  Like, the whole rivalry thing between them is super one-sided.  Gatrie, on the other hand, doesn't have that weird animosity going on with Ike, so he's just touched that Ike cares. He even cries a lil bit.

The reunion doesn't last long though.  After this chapter, Greil is killed by the Black Knight and Shinon and Gatrie leave the company.  Together, incidentally.

Soren: “Shinon and Gatrie have left us.” Boyd: “Soren!” Soren: “What? There’s nothing to hide, is there?” Ike: “They left? Both of them? Why did they–Oh, I see. They left because of me, didn’t they?" Titania: “Ike…” Boyd: “Titania told us you were going to be the new commander. Shinon just about exploded…He and Gatrie left not long ago.” Oscar: “We went after them. We tried to talk things out, but it was a waste of time.”

Incidentally, Gatrie makes the decision to leave independently if Shinon is dead at this point because he doesn't want to serve under anyone other than Greil. But as long as Shinon's alive, his issues with Ike take center stage for this conversation.  They apparently stick together long enough that the rest of the group seems to talk to them both?  Eventually they go their separate ways though, with Gatrie finding a job as Astrid's bodyguard and Shinon enlisting in the Daein army.  I'm really curious at what point they split up tbh?  It's never really addressed and Gatrie's surprised to see Shinon fighting with Daein later on, so they pretty much definitely parted ways before that.  It's possible that it really wasn't long after this, although I like to think they stuck together for at least a little while.  This is getting into headcanon territory, but I think that Gatrie probably got pretty emotional when they were saying their goodbyes but probably bounced back pretty quickly afterward.  Shinon seems to me like he'd pretend it didn't really affect him at all, but other than possibly Rolf, Gatrie's definitely the one he's closest to in the Greil Mercenaries (and probably beyond that even?), so he's def feeling something.  He tries to brush off his emotional reactions when it comes to his work though, as we'll see a little later, and he usually tries to convince others to do the same.

We don't see either of them again until Ike's squad just happens to run into Gatrie on his new job in Chapter 13.  He's pretty damn flirty with Astrid and has a whole support of him trying to impress her, but please Astrid, you can do better.

Gatrie: "Lady Astrid! Allow me to serve as your shield!" Astrid: "Gatrie...I'm so sorry that I've gotten you involved in this, too..." Gatrie: "Oh, please! This is nothing. I'm fine!! Before I was hired as your bodyguard, I was a top-notch mercenary! I can handle this many opponents all by myself. This is nothing." Astrid: "Is that so? Your confidence is impressive, to say the least..." Gatrie: "Tee hee! Well...trust me, my confidence is backed with my blade! I'm ready to fight!"

As most of the other Greil Mercenaries note, Gatrie is thrilled to be working for a cute girl and really wants to impress her.  He also giggles a lot when that comes up, which is another thing I'm surprised hasn't come up before now? He's a giggler.

Titania: "My...I've never seen you so serious before. Whoever your new employer is, he must be quite special...or...would I be safe in saying 'she'?" Gatrie: "Tee hee! You know me too well! But I do love the work she gives me. I'm so happy, I don't know what to do! Well, it is nice seeing you again!"

Gatrie also gets a quick base conversation with Ike in the next chapter, where he tries to get Ike to join him in Some Straight Dude Bullshit and fails miserably:

Gatrie: "No, I'm here for different reasons. I'm just...admiring the flowers." Ike: "Oh, right. Yes, they all seem to be in bloom this time of year. The large yellow ones are especially pretty." Gatrie: "Not those flowers...THOSE flowers!" Ike: "...Gatrie, we're inside. There's nothing here but the temple handmaidens." Gatrie: "Exactly! It's like a whole new species of girl lives in Begnion! Everyone in this palace is drop-dead gorgeous!" Ike: "..." Gatrie: "You know what I mean, Ike? Tee hee! Say, which one strikes your fancy? That buxom lass with the chestnut hair is... Hey, Ike? Ike? Bah! He's still just a boy!"

First off, there is absolutely no way in hell Ike is a heterosexual.  Also I'm so sure that this wasn't intentional, especially since the rest of the conversation is focused on girls, but Gatrie does say that everyone in the palace is drop-dead gorgeous, which I didn't notice until now and I think I'm just gonna... call Death of the Author on this one, Gatrie is mega impressed by the dudes too.

Another thing to talk about here is Gatrie phrasing something weirdly (again) with the "whole new species of girl" thing.  Gatrie... What the fuck.  Honestly, I was gonna try to analyze that line but all I can come up with is "What the fuck, Gatrie" so I'm just gonna let it serve as a segueway to talking about Gatrie's non-Shinon support conversations and how he approaches relationships with women and how it's... honestly not great.  Like I think he's well-intentioned with all of it?  Like he wants to be romantic and do nice things, but he's suuuper forward with the flirting and gets kind of pedestal-y from time to time.  Eugh, fair warning, some of this stuff gets kind of uncomfortable:

Gatrie: "Marcia! How are you doing, beautiful?" Marcia: "Huh? How do you know my name?" Gatrie: "Why wouldn't I know the name of a cute girl like you?! You know, there was a time when Titania was the only woman in this mercenary group. Things have really started to shape up while I was away. Mmm... Not bad at all." Marcia: "Oh, nice line, chump. I'm swooning."

You tell him, Marcia.

Gatrie: "Ilyana!" Ilyana: "Oh, hello..." Gatrie: "I picked these beautiful flowers just for you!" Ilyana: "Oh..." Gatrie: "W-what? You don't like them?" Ilyana: "Well..." Gatrie: "Oh, good! So you DO like them!" Ilyana: "It's just that... Um..." Gatrie: "...No good, eh? Then what about this broach? Isn't it fashionable? I picked it up at a quaint little curio shop I stumbled upon." Ilyana: "Oh..."

You've barely talked to her Gatrie, slow down.

Gatrie: "That's nice of you to say, but having someone as gorgeous and talented as you join us is payment enough. I need nothing more!" Marcia: "Whoa...that's a lot of pressure. I had no idea people depended on me so much. In any case, I'll keep doing my best! Wish me luck!" Gatrie: "She's so adorable! She will be mine... Oh, yes. She...will...be...mine."

Gatrie, please chill out just a little.  On that note, Gatrie does tend to push boundaries farther than anyone really should when he's trying to flirt.

Gatrie: "That's no good, either? Are you sure you won't take it?" Ilyana: "Well... It's nice, but..." Gatrie: "... Oh! So you love it, right? Just like you love big, strong knights?" Ilyana: "Excuse me..." Gatrie: "Hmmm. She's a tough one to swoon. I'll just have to pour it on even thicker! There's no way I'm going to let such a gorgeous girl slip away!"

He does quit eventually though, even though all of his PoR supports with girls end with him deciding not to give up.  He's not total garbage when it comes to boundaries, just somewhat.

Gatrie: "Not interested, are you?" Ilyana: "It's not that--" Gatrie: "You don't want it, do you?" Ilyana: "Not really..." Gatrie: "Hmm, this tactic isn't working. To be honest, I was thinking that if I gave you something you liked, you might come out to dinner with me sometime."

Astrid: "I don't have a boyfriend. But... I do have a fiance." Gatrie: "What?! A fiance?!" Astrid: "Yes." Gatrie: "Well, er... Congratulations!" Astrid: "Gatrie! Do you have something in your eye?" Gatrie: "Oh... Don't worry about me. ...Sniff... Sniff... As long as you're happy... ...Sniiiifff..." Astrid: "Gatrie! Where are you going?" Gatrie: "I screwed up again! I thought I had a chance this time, too. Hmmm... Wait... She said she had a fiance, didn't she? Going out of her way to tell me that... She must want me to swoon her off her feet and steal her away! That's it! She should have just said so! Wait for me, Astrid!"

And thus the cycle continues.  I mean, Astrid literally ran away from home and needed to hire a bodyguard because she wanted to get away from Lekain so badly (as would most people), so it's not like Gatrie was completely misreading the mood there.  But he doesn't want to disrupt a hypothetical happy relationship and, in his support with Ilyana, he eventually gets the hint and I really don't think I'm overromanticizing him by saying that if he hadn't mentioned dinner and Ilyana hadn't jumped on that free food opportunity, he would have excused himself and had a good cry and that would have been the end of it.

Another thing about Gatrie's flirting attempts is that he tries really, really hard to seem cool.  He does a little bit of this with everyone, like when he arrives as a reinforcement in Chapter 17:

Gatrie: "...Puff... Puff... Whew!  There you are!  Hold on, everyone!  Your knight in shining armor has arrived!"

Man, he just keeps sweatin in that armor, huh.  He lays it on super thick when he's flirting though.

Gatrie: "I'm Gatrie. But I'm sure you already knew that." Ilyana: "Um...well, actually..." Gatrie: "Of course, I'm sure you've heard all about my victories on the battlefield. Oh, there was that business with the dragon..."

Gatrie: "Marcia! Good to see you. Actually, I was just about to meet up with Ike for a little sparring session." Marcia: "W-what!? You're going to fight the commander?!" Gatrie: "You bet I am! That's why I asked you to stop by. I wanted to invite you along so you could check me out in action. Now, don't get my wrong... Ike is a strong commander. But he doesn't have a chance to match my overwhelming physical power! It's breathtaking, really." Marcia: "Breathtaking? Really... I can't wait to see this, Gatrie." Gatrie: "Ha ha ha! Well, what can I say? Why don't you just kick back and watch me unleash the raw fury of these mighty arms! Hhhrraaaawwww!"

Gatrie: "Oh, I get it! That's very admirable, Astrid! Er... But now isn't the best time for that. I'm a little sore from... uh...lifting heavy things... Blast! Where's Titania when you need her? I don't know the first thing about training people..." Astrid: "Sorry? I didn't catch that." Gatrie: "Ha ha! No, nothing at all! Let's train some other day! I want to make sure I'm totally prepared!"

"Lifting heavy things."  Right.  He also gets pretty damn upset when he completely fails to look cool in front of someone he's interested in, as best shown in his supports with Marcia:

Marcia: "What's the matter, big fella? You're looking down." Gatrie: "It's better if you don't talk to me at all, Marcia. Don't even give me a second look. I'm nothing but dirt. I'm worse than dirt... I'm...sludge!" Marcia: "Oh, boy... This is about the other day, isn't it? When you got beaten down by--" Gatrie: "Don't remind me! I was such a fool! I can't believe I let you see me get smacked around like that. I might as well throw in the towel now. I'm just a big loser..."

So in summary, Gatrie tries to impress people by faking being cooler and tougher than he is and aiming for Big Romantic Gestures, usually without checking to see if they'd be appreciated first.  Like I said, I think he's well-intentioned and genuinely wants to pursue these relationships??  But he's a goddamn mess.  I'm about to blow your mind though with something I found out by combing through the RD support lines:

Shinon's even worse at flirting.

Shinon doesn't flirt nearly as often??  There is literally one totally unambiguous example of Shinon flirting with someone and... It Sure Is A Thing.

Shinon: "You know, I try to stay out of relationships. And I’m not saying I want a relationship. But, Princess Leanne, I do hope you live."

I hope somebody read that and is haunted by it for as long as I've been.  He's like?? negging her???  He's literally negging her, he's negging Leanne of all people, I don't know how else to describe it.  Most of the A-supports in RD take on some vaguely romantic undertones (Leanne herself basically proposes to anyone she has an A-support with-- Leanne is canon bi, u heard it here folks), so naturally most of Shinon's have him saying that it's not like he gets attached to other soldiers, he doesn't have friends or anything, by the way Apostle Sanaki, his mom never hugged him, you know.  No, really, that line is real and Sanaki-exclusive:

Shinon: "You know, I’m not very sentimental. My mother never hugged me. Anyway… Apostle Sanaki, you’re kinda key. You should live. I hope we both make it ’til the bitter end!"

Just a few other highlights of Shinon making an ass out of himself:

Shinon: "You know, I never thought I’d say this, but… King Naesala, I’m thinkin’ you should live. Don’t ask me why! Just a crazy notion. Maybe I like you?"

Shinon: "You know, I’m not one for making friends and being nice. But, Caineghis, I gotta say, you are one bad laguz. In a good way! Hang in there."

Of course, if Shinon is responding to someone else's encouragements to stay alive or declaration of some form of affection, he's still a massive tool about it:

Shinon: "Don’t try to tie me down with that. But I’ll think about it. Maybe."

ANYWAY, Shinon is BAD at letting people know they matter to him and is just as bad at responding to people letting him know that he matters to them!  Like, he's obviously attached to Gatrie and Rolf even if he doesn't care for most of the Greil Mercenaries, Gatrie at least is very obviously his friend, as is whoever he gets an A-support in RD with. It really seems like he just isn't really sure how to... say that. We also see a little bit of him having trouble processing other people caring about him in PoR support with Rolf too:

Rolf: "The first time I went into battle, my feet were shaking because I was so scared. But then I held the bow that you made for me, and it gave me strength. And I said, 'Rolf! You can do this!' I learned absolutely everything from you! That's how I've stayed alive this whole time." Shinon: "...But why on earth... Why would you depend on me like that? I mean, I just I taught you how to fire the bow on a whim."

Just a quick note on Gatrie's RD supports before I move on: Because all of the support dialogue is generic fill-in-the-name, it's really tough to figure out who's being talked to unless they have a unique title, so I can't say for sure what Shinon and Gatrie's supports look like or who Gatrie's supposed to be talking to at all in most of his.  I don't??? see a clear gender distinction with his more generic lines??  Like he has a few variations that don't involve calling someone a king or Apostle, but they pretty much all follow  the same pattern of acting like he had no idea the other person would be there, What A Coincidence, for the C-support, showboating a bit and telling them that he'll protect them (so long as they're okay with that) for the B-support, and saying that he'd never let anything happen to them If They Could Please Survive for the A-support.  No clear romantic cues in any of them, which is a little strange given his continuing characterization as a Big Flirt With The Ladies.  Arguably he's sorta flirting with everyone, since, like I said, a lot of the RD supports come across as romantic??  He's just finally being low-key about it for once.

When Shinon finally comes back as an enemy in PoR, he doesn't give a shit that he used to work with the Greil Mercenaries, he'll fight em no problem... or so he says.  The more I look at his dialogue for this chapter, the more I think that he was really hoping it wouldn't happen.  He gives some of them pep talks, tries to write the whole thing off as business, but he also encourages some of them to just... avoid him?  Like he'll still attack them after the conversation, but he clearly doesn't want to.  Some examples:

Rhys: "Shinon!" Shinon: "...Oh, Rhys. Great. I can't believe I've run into you." Rhys: "It is great, isn't it? Oh, it's good to have you back. When you left us, I was really worried about what would happen, but--" Shinon: "Hey, Rhys? Shut up. In case you hadn't noticed...we're enemies out here." Rhys: "What? You can't... You're not serious, are you?" Shinon: "You honestly never thought this could happen? You're beyond good natured. You're a fool." Rhys: "Shinon... What are you saying? You've always been gruff, but...Are you serious?" Shinon: "It's not like this is the first time I've called you out. You've never considered that people may not like you, have you? Know what? We were companions once, but if I'm getting paid, I'll gladly put an arrow through your eye." Rhys: "Shinon... Is there something you can't tell us that's forcing you to do this? Are you protecting someone? Has someone you love been taken hostage? If so, we could--" Shinon: "No! There's nothing! Nothing but the right price, at least... You're overestimating me. Get going, pretty boy. Stick around any longer, and I'll start earning my pay with you!"

Mist: "Shi-Shinon? Ohmigosh...Why are you with the Daein army?!" Shinon: "...Tsk. None of your business, kid." Mist: "But that's... Oh, what should I do? You used to be one of us. I can't fight you!" Shinon: "Stop whining. Didn't you ever think what it means to be a mercenary? We're enemies, kid. Get it? I'm ready to fight when you are. So what's it going to be?" Mist: "...Um..." Shinon: "...Yeah?" Mist: "No! I won't fight you!" Shinon: "Gah! What ARE you going to do then?" Mist: "Come back to the Greil Mercenaries!" Shinon: "What?" Mist: "If you won't do that, then come work for the Crimean army! Please?" Shinon: "Don't be stupid. Either way, Ike's in charge, right?" Mist: "Yes, but I don't--" Shinon: "I won't work for him. Get it? We used to be friends, so I'm going to let you go. Now get your naive little butt out of here!" Mist: "Shinon... Sniff...sniff...Wh-wh-why...? Sniff... Whaaaaaaaaa!" Shinon: "Crying's not going to help. Look, it doesn't matter who you send to talk to me. My answer's the same." Mist: "Even Rolf?" Shinon: "...Yeah. Even Rolf. Get out of here. The next time I see you, I'll stick an arrow in you. Count on it."

Boyd: "Shinon! I couldn’t care less who you decide to work for… Heck, I’d hoped you were dead! But even so, Daein? You couldn’t find anything better than this? What were you thinking?" Shinon: "Haven’t changed a bit, have you? You’re still a mouthy piece of work. Listen up! Daein’s a great place to work right now. The pay’s great, and strength at arms is the only thing that determines class standing. You want to join me?"

Of course, you could definitely argue that Shinon knows that there's no way Boyd will take him up on that offer (he's more or less civil with Oscar but I can't imagine Shinon actually cares about Boyd, given his feelings toward Ike and Soren and how Boyd is also an Annoying Teen), but it's still an out to this fight that doesn't involve Shinon surrendering.  He also basically just tells Mist to steer clear of him instead of fighting her initially and asbolutely does not seem happy to see Rhys and I don't think that's just because Rhys is too much of an angel for Shinon to stomach (although it's that too).  Like instead of starting the fight, he just tells him to scram.  Also I love how Rhys jumps to the conclusion that Daein is holding one of Shinon's loved ones hostage and that's why he's working with them.  Pretty sure that the details of Shinon's personal life are just a mystery to everyone else??  I also love that Shinon calls Rhys "pretty boy" in this conversation, but I don't think there's a whole lot to glean from that.  Of course, Shinon also has some dialogue with Gatrie in this chapter:

Gatrie: "Shi-Shinon? SHINON?! Oh, this can’t be happening! I mean, fighting you… That’s going to be tough." Shinon: "Come on, Gatrie. You can’t be worried about me forever. You’re a mercenary. All you need to do is worry about your own skin. You got it?" Gatrie: "Well, yeah… Heh heh heh… Ahh… Still…this will be a sad day…"

God...  So clearly, Gatrie doesn't want to go through with this, but Shinon gives him a little pep talk that covers roughly the same ground as his conversations with Rolf on this stage.  Gatrie does seem to try to cover up how surprised and upset he is, although it doesn't work too well imo.  Also there's the implication that Gatrie worries about Shinon on a semi-regular basis?  It's not really reflected anywhere else but I'm glad he apparently does because Shinon could probably use someone worrying about him lmao.  Again, Shinon tries to play it off like he doesn't care that he's fighting his old comrades, but honestly I get the vibe that his pep talks to Gatrie and Rolf are self-talk almost as much as he's trying to get them to be okay fighting him.  It's just... a mess tbh.

Once the stage is over, Shinon is FINALLY back and ready for support conversations.  Can u believe that I was pretty much just going to talk about Shinon and Gatrie's support convos in this meta... I can't believe it took me like 7k words to get here, I am so sorry.  Anyway, the number of stages Shinon and Gatrie both need to be deployed in to unlock their C-support is pretty low and is p much automatically met before they leave the Greil Mercenaries.  So Shinon comes back and is immediately ready to start shooting the shit with Gatrie again. And right away, we start with the flirting tbh:

Shinon: "Whatever. See you around." Gatrie: "W-wait! I'm just joking! Stop being so mean and listen for a second!" Shinon: "I will if you buy dinner tonight." Gatrie: "Mmmm... Oh, all right. But you better give me good advice!"

Remember how Gatrie gave Ilyana like a million presents as a prelude to asking if he could buy her dinner?  He's just gotta talk to Shinon for like five seconds and there Shinon is, asking him to buy him dinner, and Gatrie's like "Okay sure."  Shinon's dialogue also suggests that the two of them eat dinner together by themselves pretty regularly. We also see that, even tho Shinon acts annoyed with Gatrie a lot of the time, the negative feedback he's giving here is... honestly pretty fair and probably legit intended to be helpful??:

Gatrie: "But every time I spend money, you give me a hard time!" Shinon: "I do? How?" Gatrie: "What about the other day, when I bought the Ultimate Shield?!" Shinon: "Gatrie, that was a castle gate. Hey, did you ever give that back? That guard thought you were a thief." Gatrie: "And remember the SpeedBring 4000? That secret elixir that boosts speed just by sprinkling it over your body--" Shinon: "You mean that putrid snake oil? You dumped the whole bottle on your head without smelling it first." Gatrie: "But that wonderful little potion worked! I DID move faster!" Shinon: "You moved faster because thirty stray dogs were chasing you."

WOW Gatrie's gullible.  Shinon is definitely a jackass but it really does seem like he's trying to look out for Gatrie on this front.  Maybe Shinon's line about Gatrie worrying about him was more self-talk?

Gatrie's not totally afraid to call Shinon out on his being a jackass though, which is good.  He also apologizes when he thinks he's actually made Shinon upset:

Gatrie: "See! You're giving me a hard time again!" Shinon: "Oh, did I hurt your feelings? Wow, it sure is fun to tell you the truth and have you grumble at me in return." Gatrie: "No, no! I didn't mean to... Er... Sorry..." Shinon: "Hmm... You're too honest sometimes..." Gatrie: "Hee hee! You're embarrassing me!" Shinon: "All right, let's go eat! Now that's spending wisely!" Gatrie: "Yeah, let's... Wait a minute, Shinon! You didn't help me at all! This isn't part of the deal!"

Okay, I have to take a second to roast Shinon for almost exactly saying "Did I hurt your precious feelings?"  Jfc, he's talking like some shitty anti-SJ blogger... Red and black blog theme... Logic and rationality are the arrows in his quiver... Pictures of anime titty girls... Welcome to his twisted mind...  Chill the fuck out, dude.  He's messing with Gatrie though and doesn't let it go on too long. Honestly, it feels like flirty teasing to me?  As has been established, Shinon is Extremely Bad at flirting.  And Gatrie reacts to this Possible Bad Flirting by... giggling and telling Shinon that he's embarrassing him.  Like that's just a gay line of dialogue and nothing about the context makes it less gay tbh.  Gatrie has been Flirted With and seems to be responding positively.  The rest of the support takes a step back from that, though, and focuses on Gatrie's efforts to Woo A Lady.

Gatrie: "I really want to ask you something. Right now!" Shinon: "No, Gatrie." Gatrie: "I'll pay for dinner again." Shinon: "Get lost." Gatrie: "We'll eat somewhere more expensive tonight." Shinon: "Appetizers?" Gatrie: "Sure! You can order anything you want!" Shinon: "All right, then. I think I can spare some time for my brother-in-arms." Gatrie: "Aw, thanks Shinon! I owe you one!"

A couple things here.  One, Gatrie obviously respects Shinon's opinion/advice even tho it's unnecessarily harsh.  Two, he's totally aware that the way to get Shinon to answer his question is to offer to take him somewhere nicer.  I mean, free food is a Powerful Motivator, but I'm so sure there's something else going on on Shinon's end here.  Three, Gatrie, you're buying him dinner...  I don't think you really owe him anything else.  Gatrie's sleazy as hell, but he somehow manages to be innocent and sweet at the same time, idk how he does it.

Gatrie has a hell of a time actually asking his question though.

Shinon: "...Well? What do you want?" Gatrie: "Well, actually... What I need to ask you is..." Shinon: "Spit it out!" Gatrie: "Well, it's... Oh, I don't know. Do you really want to hear it?" Shinon: "Do that one more time, and I'll put an arrow through your eye!" Gatrie: "W-wait! Just a minute! I'll tell you now... Are you ready?" Shinon: "Aaaaaarrrgh!" Gatrie: "Ihaveanewgirlfriend!!!!" Shinon: "A new girlfriend? Is she blind or something?"

Aaaand he immediately gets negged for his efforts.  Shinon is definitely not immediately happy that Gatrie's seeing someone and Gatrie seems to know that that's going to be the case.  I chalk this up to jealousy on Shinon's part and Gatrie having some dim awareness of how Shinon feels.  Shinon cleans his act up pretty quickly though, thank fuck.  Gatrie's his friend first and given how much time Gatrie spends flirting with ladies, I doubt Shinon thinks this is going anywhere anyway.

Shinon: "Well, I'm happy for you. Oh, I see. You want to ask me what kind of gift to give her, right?" Gatrie: "Tee hee hee! Yeah, that's right! What should I give her?" Shinon: "I know everything there is to know about gift giving, my friend. I'll tell you all about it over a fine meal." Gatrie: "Please do, romance master!"

Romance master. Wow.  So Gatrie thinks that Shinon is like... good at this stuff. I mean, it's totally possible that if Shinon finds himself in a relationship, he does romantic stuff and is actually good at it.  I can see that.  He'd keep a closely guarded secret though, I think, considering his idea of flirting seems to include telling someone that he's not interested in relationships in general and he's not looking for a relationship with THEM, he just doesn't want them to die. Like, my dude... wanting someone to not die doesn't even vaguely imply u wanna date or anything, like when I hear "I do you hope you live," my mind doesn't go anywhere near any type of attraction.  I doubt that Gatrie got his entire ""technique"" from Shinon though, since he's really heavy on the compliments and upfront about his intentions, which is basically the opposite of what Shinon does in practice.  Still, Gatrie seems to dig it!! Someone has to, I guess!!

Of course, this relationship doesn't pan out for Gatrie.  Actually, none of them do?  Skipping ahead to the semi-tragic ending, Shinon and Gatrie never get it together, and for all his efforts at wooing, Gatrie never gets it together with anyone:

Perpetual Guardian (護る盾, Mamoru tate, lit. Protective Shield) Gatrie became a famous mercenary and a household name. Fate led him to find many women but never true love.

Shinon doesn't either, although his RD epilogue reads a bit more sad to me?

Deadly Adept (百の手, Crack Shot in the Japanese version) Shinon lazes the days away in his old haunts. An expert at all he put his hand to, he chose none as his calling.

I mean, if he's content, he's content, and the driving force behind his ambition in PoR is being able to live comfortably, which it sounds like he's doing??  But, predictably I guess since the dude has a definite habit of pushing people away, Shinon's ending sounds p damn lonely.  The reference to "old haunts" especially makes me feel like this isn't really supposed to be a good ending for him?  Still, I do hope he's happy with how things worked out for him.  Anyway, on to their PoR A-support to end on a high note.

Gatrie: "..." Shinon: "What the...?" Gatrie: "..." Shinon: "Why are you standing out here like a scarecrow?" Gatrie: "Hey, Shinon. I'm just waiting for my girlfriend." Shinon: "Oh. Her. Right. You're still dating?"

For the record, Shinon is smiling for that last line, so it's not SO blatantly him being jealous of Nameless Girl like I first thought it was when I was just reading the text.  He ends up being the one to hear out Gatrie's story about how he got engaged to her and then gave her all of his money but she's late to their meeting tonight.  So he also ends up being the one to express concern that Gatrie rushed this relationship and the one to break the news that she conned him.

Gatrie: "She knows I'm with this army, and... And..." Shinon: "Gatrie? She's not coming. You've been conned." Gatrie: "Whaaat!? No, I don't believe it! She's such a fine girl! So pure and kind! She'd never hornswoggle ol' Gatrie!" Shinon: "How can someone with only days left to live manage to walk the streets looking for a knight with lots of money?" Gatrie: "Because... Because she needed to meet me! It's fate! Remember?" Shinon: "Then why isn't she here?" Gatrie: "B-because... Um... Wolves?" Shinon: "No, Gatrie. It's not wolves."

He's a LOT gentler about this than he was about Gatrie's other bad deals. Like he knows this is gonna hurt Gatrie, so he's not gonna mess around about it. Gatrie takes it pretty damn well though.  Shinon is madder than Gatrie is?

Gatrie: "Oh... Hee hee! Hee hee hee! I guess ol' Gatrie... Whaa ha ha! I guess I got taken again! Whaa ha ha ha... Whooo! Oh man, I'll never learn." Shinon: "Tell me what she looks like." Gatrie: "Huh? Why?" Shinon: "All your money? That's going too far. I'll find her and...get it back."

Shinon's willing to Go To Bat for Gatrie when it comes down to it.  Of course, Gatrie is arguably too nice about this and says he's fine with it, Shinon doesn't need to do all that.

Shinon: "Sigh... You're hopeless, Gatrie. You know that?" Gatrie: "Yeah, I know. But I don't mind so much. It makes me kinda charming, right?" Shinon: "Well, I guess you don't have to worry about what to do with your money anymore." Gatrie: "Yeah, that's right. Hey, if you look at it that way, it's a blessing in disguise!"

Check it out: That fucking instant subject change when Gatrie asks if his gullibility makes him charming.  Shinon neither confirms nor denies that shit!! Like I said, I don't think Shinon expects this to actually go anywhere and even if he did, now would Not be the time.  Shinon's not about to make a move or anything, but he does make an effort to cheer Gatrie up:

Shinon: "Let's go find a watering hole with some cute waitresses. What do you say?" Gatrie: "Hey, that's a great idea! Oh, but... I don't have any money. Sorry, Shinon. Maybe some other time." Shinon: "Forget it. It's my treat." Gatrie: "Are...are you sure?" Shinon: "Yep." Gatrie: "Hee hee hee!" Shinon: "What's so funny?" Gatrie: "Supper on your gold piece? This is my lucky day!" Shinon: "Hopeless."

So FINALLY Shinon takes Gatrie out for dinner for once.  He's smiling fondly when he calls Gatrie hopeless that last time, he's very obviously feeling some sort of affection.  I think you can make a case that he's talking to himself a little bit too... Like Gatrie is a Disaster and yet... This is who Shinon likes... They're both hopeless tbh.  They definitely don't have the healthiest romantic dynamic, I have to admit that, but??? There is Something there.  Like Shinon is too flirty with Gatrie (he gets the guy to buy him dinner HOW OFTEN, like that is a Fake Date, Shinon is making an organized effort to Fake Date Gatrie as a substitute for Real Dating him) and Gatrie is honestly pretty receptive to it??  My personal headcanon for the situation is that Shinon has A Thing for Gatrie that he kind of tries to ignore but he also cares about Gatrie as a person and wants to be there for him when shit's rough and is enough of a decent person deep down that he wants to be happy for Gatrie a little bit, like he's probably Considered ruining Gatrie's fucking life all the time just because he's jealous but he always talks himself down from that shit because like... Bad, while Gatrie is??? sorta into this, he definitely likes Shinon and even Like likes him a bit, but he's too bogged down in heteronormativity to connect the dots about the feelings on either side (I say this sympathetically, I have Been There once upon a time).  I believe in him tho... He'll figure his shit out eventually...

Like I said way earlier, they can handle each other's personalities, like Gatrie doesn't even to seem to CARE that Shinon is massive dick, he p much just manages to brush it off.  And for all that Shinon complains about Gatrie being gullible and annoying, he's sure not going anywhere.  So when Shinon tries to neg Gatrie or w/e, Gatrie barely notices the insult part and sticks around.  And Gatrie basically can't do his typical Big Flirt because that depends on the person he's flirting with thinking he's cool and suave and Shinon already KNOWS that Gatrie's not really either of those things (at least not by the definition that Gatrie is going for), like he knows whatever incident Gatrie is referring to when he talks about "that business with the dragon" and I am so so sure it's not nearly as impressive as that summary makes it sounds (like if it wasn't something he was Completely making up, he probably just... got rid of a big lizard from someone's tent or something) and Shinon would def call that shit out.  Gatrie goes to him for advice a lot and is p much just himself around Shinon??  So like, not that he'd never try and not that Shinon wouldn't probably just laugh at him (which isn't strictly a negative response), but Gatrie kinda dug himself into the hole of Being Genuine with Shinon at some point, which I think is a much more stable starting point for a romantic relationship than how he approaches the women he's interested in.  Basically I don't... see them having a successful long-term romantic relationship with anyone else??  GOD I really did not want to end this meta like that, but I'm finally running out of stuff I wanted to say lmao.  Anyway, basically all of this was just to say that I love their dynamic even tho it's a lil messed up and there's def a Something going on there in canon imo altho I doubt it's an Official Relationship.  Hoooly fuck if you read all of that, thank u.

#Fire Emblem #Shinon #Gatrie #Shinon/Gatrie #Tellius #Meta tag

[tweefunk]

Fuckin’ things man.

IDK, my BFF Jill? I want to write nice things I really. I don’t like being a negative Nancy.

The Orwells-Terrible Human Beings

4/10

Eh. Dangerous sexuality only works as an aesthetic when it's tragically hip and elegantly disheveled. See all hyped indie-rock from 2001-2005.

When a bunch of gangly-ass white eggheads from the suburbs consciously re-create it a decade late(r) as a marketing ploy it's just nauseating.

Unfortunately, this isn't that entertainingly awful. It's worse. Boring.

Suicide Silence-S/T

3/10

Suicide Silence attempts what other metalcore acts have done more successfully; transition to an accessible mainstream rock sound and audience. It worked for BMTH and ADTR, but here it just further accentuates that Suicide Silence is a one-trick pony.

The terrible lead single “Doris” set the bar low and became an instant meme, but unfortunately, it’s one of the comparatively bright spots on this underwhelming record. 

Suicide Silence’s attempts at a radio-rock crossover sound come across like a garage band stumbling through bad Deftones covers at their first practice. The sheer ineptitude, combined with the fact that a label was even willing to release this, is astounding.

This mediocrity (to put it mildly) casts the remnants of Suicide Silence’s old deathcore sound in an unfairly favorable light. The brief forays into competence provide welcome relief.

I expect a severe course correction on their next release.

Dirty Projectors-S/T

2/10

Let’s just get this out of the way early. Dave Longstreth is exceptionally talented. He possesses an Ivy League music degree, and it shows. His understanding of melody, harmony, and tonality is nearly unparalleled in pop music, and I’m just some jackass with a tumblr page.

I guess now is as good a time as any to admit (if you couldn’t figure it out for yourself) that I don’t review music in an objective, structural sense. I review music in a subjective, what-does-it-all-mean, how-does-this-relate-to-the-culture-at-large, how-does-this advance-the-medium/genre kinda way. I don’t get into the nuts and bolts of production, or cadences, or harmonic structures unless it’s distracting from the overall message of the product. 

Take punk for example. No one would ever mistake the Ramones for virtuosos, but you would be an idiot to write them off since pretty much all mainstream rock since the late 70′s owes at least a foundational aesthetic to them.

Speaking of punk, (SEGUE!) the first Dirty Projectors album anyone cared about was 2007′s Rise Above the post-modern circle jerk in which the group re-imagined (read: drained of all life, and ignored the cultural context behind...) Black Flag’s 1981 opus. The ironic, self-satisfied condescension of a bunch of literal art-school rejects layering dense fussed-over harmonies onto songs that were imagined as blinding, cathartic rage against both internal emotional and external structural oppression is still nauseating a decade later.

Some dipshit tried to fight me in college for saying that once. 

While Dirty Projectors are once again a solo act, the same sense of narcissistic genre-superiority is still alive and kicking. Except now there is nice dollop of nice-guy woe-is-me misogyny AND a desperate attempt to fit in with the kids and their hippity-hop. In “Up in Hudson,” Longstreth whines “Now I'm listening to Kanye on the Taconic Parkway/riding fast/And you're out in Echo Park/blasting 2Pac/drinking a fifth for my ass.” As you might know, this record is about the breakup of Longstreth and his lover/bandmate Amber Coffman. The above lyric might not be so gross if it weren’t for the fact that opening lines of the record are “I don't know why you abandoned me/You were my soul and my partner.” Well, I’m sure your whiny victim mentality didn’t have anything to do with it.

This tack continues as Longstreth continues to make not-so-subtle jabs at the moral and artistic credibility of his ex. Returning to the opening track, Longstreth delivers this particularly pissy kiss-off: “What I want from art is truth/What you want is fame/Now we'll keep 'em separate/And you keep your name”

Taking this line in context of his east-west dichotomy (LA a symbol of fake plasticity and NY is gritty realism) and the long standing truism that women in the performing arts are often viewed as superficial entertainers providing fun escapism whilst the men get on with such lofty things like “Real” Art, Objectivity, Reason, and Truth.

And in a roundabout way this bring me to my major gripe with the cult of Dirty Projectors and hipsterdom in general. It’s no secret that I grew up as disciple of the early 2000′s pop-punk and emo scene, which has rightly been critiqued as cesspool of vengeful, beta-male “nice-guy” revenge-misogyny. Say Anything’s “Every Man Has A Molly” is perfect example of this with lines like “Molly Connolly ruined my life/I thought the world should know.” 

However, I would argue that Say Anything’s treatment of the subject is more palatable since Max Bemis seems to be capable of self-reflection and critique. In contrast, every time Dave Longstreth comes to close to admitting a fault, it comes caked in backhanded sarcasm since he knows he has to pay lip service to being magnanimous.

And now I turn on the critics: Why the fuck is it ok for an effeté ninny (oh the beautiful irony) to spew this venom, but when a bunch of skate rats in a garage whine about girls ignoring them, it’s an affront to music and good taste? At least the latter group can have a sense of humor about themselves and their genre. But go ahead and lionize the 30-something Yale grad pandering to modern production trends in a desperate bid for self-aggrandizing relevance.

However, as my rating shows, this record isn’t all bad. The mid-album ballad “Little Bubble” is actually quite beautiful and one of the few moments where Longstreth allows his mask to slip and recognizes that this is maybe, partially, his fault.

And lastly, can we laugh at that album art? It’s a fucking broken Nutter Butter.

Thundercat-Drunk

7/10

If you’re into jazz or funk, this essential listening. Thundercat is an incredible musician and his songwriting manages to be hilarious and personal at the same time.

Seriously, one of singles is about Goku. Unfortunately, it gets a little noodly at times, but if you’ve enjoyed his work with Flying Lotus and Kendrick Lamar, definitely check this out.

Also, the guest appearances from Kenny Loggins and Michael McDonald may be final confirmation that the yacht-rock aesthetic is being revived. 

Sun Kil Moon-Common as Light and Love are Red Valleys of Blood

9/10

Anyone who follows my writing knows that one of my biggest complaints about records is that they’re too long, so with a running time of over two hours, I should probably hate this.

Not so.

Mark Kozelek does not make songs, or by extension records, in any traditional sense. Since 2012′s Among the Leaves, he has slowly transitioned away from folky songs about mundane happenings in his life, to creating backing tracks to accompany dramatic readings of his diary.

Ok, that’s an oversimplification, but on many tracks here he drops al pretense to lyricism and recites letters, or just recounts what he was doing on a particular. Right down to giving us the exact date and the entreé he ate for dinner.

On a sonic level, the record moves away from the classical guitar stylings of the last few albums, and bases the sound around hypnotic bass lines and synth textures.

I’m really not doing a good job of selling this, but there’s something disarming about a man who has long ago achieved his place in the music world giving absolutely no thought whatsoever into sales, critical appeasement, or fan expectations.

With the exception of critics, none of this seems to be motivated by angst or spite, but rather from an intense desire to document all that he feels and thinks.

It’s almost Chekovian in a way. The droll observations on daily occurrences, and in some cases, dubious urban legends, allow for the profundity of the human condition to be put on full display.

CALALARVOB works because it takes the listener on a journey of discovery, not only of the world around them, but their own soul as well. If you’re willing to follow Kozelek down the (long, twisting) rabbit holes he regularly detours down, you’ll be in for a treat. 

The only sections that fall flat are Kozelek’s anti-technology rants. He spends so much time mocking smartphone users, that his very valid criticisms of the political climate or music industry circle-jerks at SXSW can get buried under his admittedly self-aware curmudgeonliness. 

This record will drain you with blunt depictions of the world’s horror, and build you up with a steadfast commitment to love and joy wherever you can find it.

Strap in, it’s gonna be a hell of a ride.