#You'd Better Believe It!! (Naruto Uzumaki) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

theunrealinsomniac · 2 years

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How do you think the Naruto couples would be as parents?

Gonna guess we're talking for my preferred ships?

Buckle in, this'll take a while lol.

Overall? I'd say they're good parents on average. Somethings they're a little meh, there are some personal shortcomings that do sadly negatively impact their parenting but for the most part they're good.

Sasuke is the only one who isn't outright good, dependent on the universe he's better or worse. Wedding AU Sasuke for example is a bad person and a worse father so ... yeah.

But Naruto? Naruto is the dad you both wanted and needed as a kid. He is the dad who is your biggest supporter and at the same time able to call you out on your shit in a loving but firm way. He knows what it's like to not have parents growing up and he will not let his children ever know what that's like. He also was very aware any child of his had the potential to be a nightmare to discipline and has some rather ingenious ways to go about it, as it is actually him who's the disciplinarian in the Uzumaki household, more than Sakura.

Looking at you Boruto. Fuck you for what you did to Naruto.

Sakura is a great mum too. She's a little stricter than Naruto, but not as much as you'd think. It is Naruto who doles out most of the punishments after all. But you can't pull on Sakura's heartstrings like you can Naruto's. Sakura is the one who gets into shouting matches with her kids when they hit the awkward teenager stages though, but the love is absolute. You need to be picked up from a party cos someone's making you uncomfortable? Sakura's already out the driveway. There was one time Sachi had snuck out to a party she'd been told she couldn't go to and had gotten so drunk she couldn't walk home. She still called Sakura because she knew she'd come, and while she'd be punished, her parents first concern would be her safety.

The others in general are pretty good, Shikamaru needs a kick up the arse once or twice to be reminded he hasn't just got a nap buddy lol but when the big stuff comes up? He's on it.

Temari is strict. Loving but strict. She's been brought up in a very firmly run house by her father and while her strictness comes with love, it's hard to unlearn that kind of behaviour. The one time someone messed with one of her kids at school though, her reaction is still talked about in the halls of the high school.

Hinata is amazing. Hinata has mum skills that the other parents are desperate to get off her. You need a natural remedy or your baby is colicky and the doctor's not listening? Hinata Inuzuka has got you. You need someone to watch your kids while you and S/O have a much needed date night? Well the Inuzuka estate has more rooms than most and all that open field to go crazy with all the dogs. The Inuzuka house is THE gathering house in their generation.

Kiba's a fun dad. He fucks up every now and then, he's definitely swore in front of his kids and maybe been a touch reckless, but he's fun. And you're never in actual danger. He stringently believes every child should have a pet. A dog preferably but he is insistent and this is why their house is so big, because not only do he and Hinata have five kids but each child has a dog.

Ino's the hot mum. You all know what I mean. Ino has caused more than a couple sexual awakenings in her kids' friends and she finds it endlessly adorable. She's also the kind of mum you can talk to about anything. Grades are sucky and you don't know what to do about it? Ino's ready to listen and reassure. You've got a crush on a boy and you don't know how to tell him? Ino's got you.

Sai's ... well Sai's weird. He loves his kids, but it's rather detached. He's the closest to a bad dad out of the main lot but that by no means, means he's an actual bad dad. His way of expressing love is just subtler. He taught his kids to draw early, there are thousands of photos of him guiding their strokes and smiling bigger than he ever had before when his son or daughter proudly show him their handiwork.

Neji's the cool dad. Neji's all and all a badass and you better believe the other dads tease him about the sheer hero worship his kids have for him. But when your dad is essentially a secret agent, you're gonna think that's cool as a kid so he doesn't mind the teasing. Plus as another man who grew up without his father, he's a very present father so his kids see a lot more of him than you'd think.

Tenten is also the cool mum lol. She got her kids into martial arts early and she's basically a soccer mum archetype. While being at the top of her field regardless of the universe she's in. Tenten Hyuuga will kick your arse and then feed her children dinner still in the clothes she whooped your arse in five minutes ago.

I don't have specifics for the other parents in my works as they're just kinda there sadly at this point when it comes to how I've written them but rest assured they're good parents.

Oh no wait, Karin is an amazing single mum. And in universes where she's not a single mum she's still amazing. She's made it a point that no one hurts her babies like she was hurt. And you had best believe she holds Sasuke accountable for every action he's ever taken as a father. In the universes where her children have a relationship with Sasuke you had best believe Karin is the main instigator to making sure he doesn't actively suck.

tl:dr? They're all good, some are better than others but they're all good parents and Naruto is the best dad out of all of them. At least, according to his kids and wife :P.

Thanks for asking!

#ask theunrealinsomniac #naruto #long post #narusaku #saiino #shikatema #kibahina #nejiten #sasukarin

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imagine-naruto-shippuden · 7 years

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I need some Uncle!Itachi feels! Something (headcanons or a scenario or whatever you'd like) in a non-mass AU with Itachi and Sarada interacting? :3

(Cute adopted uncle!itachi and Sarada headcanons to balance out the sadness)

* Itachi would spoil her rotten every time he got the chance with what ever she wanted.* He would sneak her candy before dinner.* He would tell embarrassing story’s about Sasuke* He would also love giving her private lessons from a legendary ninja.* If Sarada has a serious thing she needs to talk about she will talk to Itachi about it* She makes him teach her how to cook too* She always takes his side and vice versa when sasuke says they can’t do something fun* He’s 100% the cool uncle that she has no problem being in public with* Sasuke does his best so Itachi and Naruto are never together with Sarada because she will definitely get what she wants * Thought her dangerous justus at a young age * When she was little he would take her to the park and he would watch her from the bench with all the other moms and they all know who he is, the legendary Itachi Uchiha leader of the Uchiha clan, so it’s intimidating but he fits right in to their gossip/your child is adorable but mine is better circle* Shows her pictures of sasuke as lessons on fashion donts.

(I’m so sorry, this is a no uchiha massacre au but I made an au that when Sarada was 4 or 5 Sasuke Sakura and Naruto where defending the village and Sakura and Sasuke where killed, Naruto then left the village and became a roaming ninja like jiraiya , Itachi is a legendary anbu and takes in Sarada. Again I’m sorry I’m so so sorry) [this is basically instant sad for a good 6 paragraphs]

It was midnight and a storm was raging above konoha, Itachi was protecting the village from debris while other ninja where evacuating the city. He stopped to look at the second Sanin fighting only a mile away, he could see Kuruma with Sasuke’s Susanoo armor and Sakuras Hundred Healings Mark. No one could help them they would just get in the way not even him or their sensei Kakashi could lend a hand.

Suddenly a blinding flash of light illuminated the sky and parted the clouds, the light lasted minutes when it faded a massive crater was all that was left, whoever they where fighting was gone as well. “Sasuke!” Itachi made his way as fast as he could towards the hole, he noticed Kakashi, still in his Hokage garb running close behind him. When they arrived there wasn’t much to see, save nine small glowing tails covering something in the distance. Naruto had been saved by karuma but just barely he looked like he should be dead. Beside him where his two teammates, they weren’t breathing. Itachi collapsed to his knees utilizing his little healing jutsu training as best he could. Naruto was being stabilized by karuma, Kakashi out his hand on it’s his shoulder. “He’s gone Itachi.” Itachi slapped his hand away he didn’t say anything and continued to cry trying to heal his little brother. Soon other medics arrive and take way Naruto, Kakashi is pulled away from the scene. Sakura and Sasuke died holding each other’s hand protecting the village and their families.

(God I’m so sorry I got really dark I’m so sorry, this is less but still dark I’m sorry)

Only two hours later the quickly did Sasuke’s funeral ceremony sealing away his eyes and making sure he was safe from grave robbers. Because of Itachis, Kakashi’s and Naruto’s insistence they burry him next to Sakura on the uchiha cemetery.

4 hours later the citizens where returning to their homes and Itachi forced himself to do something he very much didn’t want to, during the battle Hinata had looked after Sarada and her own children. Itachi knocked on the Uzumaki house hold.“Just a moment!” Hinata said softly through the door. She opened it expecting to see Naruto or Sakura. Itachi informed Hinata of the situation and how Naruto was recovering. “I’m terribly sorry… and Sarada… she’s sitting on the couch I believe. If you need anything you are always welcome to come to us.”

“Thank you Hinata.” He bowed slightly.The conversation was awkward and forced, the head of the Uchiha and he head of the Hyuga normally didn’t do favors for each other but this would be the exception. Itachi slowly made his way into their home dreading having to explain everything again and to his niece no less. She was sitting on one end of the couch looking over a sleeping Himawari, Boruto was on the other side doing the same.

1 hour later Itachi and Sarada hadn’t spoken much, Itachi didn’t know what to say and Sarada just assumed they where waiting for her parents. She was sitting in his kitchen while he made something to eat still avoiding the inevitable. “Where’s mama and papa?” She said out of the blue, this made Itachi drop his ladle.

“They… are… far away, you will be staying with me instead, ok?” He was happy with how well he concealed his pain in his voice but he wouldn’t be able to say that too her face.

“Oh… when are they coming back?” Itachi realized he didn’t have a choice but to explain more and turned around.“Well Sarada, they won’t be coming back, their gone.” He definitely looked sad but tried to sound ok. After a long pause he said. “But don’t worry, you still have me ok?” She seemed to ponder that for a while.“Ok uncle Itachi. Can I help you cook?” He smiled she didn’t understand yet but it’s probably better that way. He nodded and picked her up. “So what should we put in next? How about apples” he did his best to match her high spirits.“Apples don’t go in ramen !” She started giggling.

After cooking and eating dinner Itachi put her in one of the guest rooms, he had Shisui get all of her clothes and her bed and move it in. He was jokingly grumpy about it but knew it wasn’t the time or place to complain. Itachi sat next to her bed for maybe an hour as she asked him and shisui questions about being a ninja. When he thought she was asleep he turned off the light and quietly walked out of the room.“I love you uncle Itachi.” She said half asleep. “Good night Sarada, sleep well.” He whispered, she was already asleep.btw I kind of want to write more about this would you be interested in that?

#scenario #headcanon #Itachi #Sarada #Uchiha #sad #major character deaths

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maddmuses · 11 months

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Re: Naruto's physique and fitness routine

Time for weird fringe meta posts from Madd again. So broadly speaking, the anime and manga both simplify most examples of physique in the Naruto series, this makes sense as both productions were subject to crunch, and the physique of many characters was rarely a matter of detail.

But y'all know I'm a tad on the weird side so I'm going to talk about it.

Among animanga it's not entirely uncommon for a MC to be the "median" physically among the cast. Not too tall, not too short, not too big, not too thing. Unless possessing a specific quality is pertinent to their character, often through the narrative, such as Sena in Eyeshield 21 or Gon in hiatusXhiatus, it's rarely deviated from.

Accordingly, most drawings of Naruto's body are never showing anything exceptional as a young adult, although the anime (and manga towards the end) did portray him as a chubby kid he had a tendency to thin out before 13. If you want to know the source of this info it is found in Naruto 538.

This means that shinobi training, or at least the kind we know Naruto to get up to based on his training menus in both pieces of media, are very cardio intensive, as well he probably simply lost the weight. Though this weight loss is more than apparent, his physique on the anime side is a bit inconsistent and undetailed. Referring to the images towards the top of this post of the senjutsu training vs. what follows here:

Basically no toning lines defining or suggesting the muscles in his abdomen, which are definitely tones per above and here

Overall this is a good reference point. Throughout Shippuden, Naruto's build is definitely thin, but developed, so wiry would probably be the shorthand. It's evident that he can achieve significant physical feats both with and without chakra, consistent with a character who does a lot of calisthenics.

Being that Naruto is 5'6" tall during the Shippuden databooks (data on further physical growth uncertain after age 16/17ish but likely) it becomes apparent that this is probably a baseline build for most shinobi who are capable at taijutsu, but not strictly specialized, with an emphases on agility. Contrary to popular fandom perception, though Naruto's actual hitting style and close-up tactics tend to not be pretty, he is agile and mostly is mobile throughout a fight, particularly when employing the use of his shadow clones. A decent example can be found in ED 15.

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Though he's adaptive through it depending on his opponent, the fact is that his style is pretty "hard" with a key emphasis on moving explosively and staying within striking range of his opponent. It's why her pursues his opponent even when dodging, and really only modulates his firing range against Tenten who is armed with a bo. We know it's a hard style, particularly when fighting Lee, as it's practically identical. One could probably call this "Strong Fist lite" as he's not employing any of the inherently exhausting techniques that require him to leap and flash step distances, but it's still tiring to stay that mobile even after four brief spars.

Seeing as it's not that different from what Konohamaru uses, and Naruto has the access, it's fair to assess that this is a pretty common style of fighting in Konoha, and thus a body that's optimal to use it is consistent among characters like Naruto and Lee who have these body types (and to a degree Konohamaru who does develop a similar build in adulthood).

Overall a body type that is compact and flexible is what we can extrapolate a detailed design of Naruto to be having. Particularly, while sleight, Naruto's shoulders are on the slightly broad side compared to other men who engage in this fashion of training, inheriting a slightly wideset nature from his Uzumaki family (pictured: his ancestor) and his mother, who was frequently compared to a tomato as a girl, and has more of a pear or rectangular shape to her body. This would probably also extend to his middle too, meaning he probably wouldn't develop an "inverted triangle" but rather more trapezoidal.

Overall I'm operating under the assumption that Naruto, beyond age 15, starts to develop some serious definition, though the mass doesn't start to become impressive until 17. Beyond that point, his mass never becomes offputtingly heavy, as maintenance of a body that is quick enough to conduct his style of taijutsu is necessary. Stylistically I would compare it to real-life De Niro or Lee, rather a point somewhere between them:

So overall, I think Naruto's actual regiment/menu as an adult includes:

-Taijutsu Sparring (when he can get it) -Weighted Free-Running Cardio around Konohagakure (at least an hour on an optimal day, but most days will go for roughly 20 km/12 miles per day) -Muscle Group-Targeted Weight Lifting (Based on day but has specific days for arms, chest, back, and legs) -10x10 calisthenics (pushups, pull-ups, sit-ups, squats) on a light day -15x10 calisthenics on a moderate day -20x10 calisthenics on a heavy day -10x100 punches on a heavy bag (still dressed like Kakashi)(Weight supplemented on leg and back days) -Meditation (15 minutes on a heavy day, 20 minutes on a moderate day, 30 minutes on a light day, 5/10/15 minutes practicing senjutsu meditation) -Practice Ninjutsu (30 minutes minimum, rounds up remaining time until training completion depending on the day)

Naruto's general training block in a day can range from 4-6 hours, though he will do 8 hours for an especially intense experience when he is a young adult and more or less doing only missions.

That's the post ig, have a good day!

#You'd Better Believe It!! (Naruto Uzumaki)#maddmeta

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