#also also also: adoptees tend to take power and control whenever we can because we are scared of not having it

[redbullgivesyouwingedkuriboh]

aaaaaaaand cue the 11 pm rambling.

the thing that fucks me up about seto kaiba is how he just. takes what he thinks he deserves. and how he looks down on those who don’t.

like here’s the similarities between me and kaiba:

- very protective of anyone that we view as needing it

- adopted

- make the best out of our situations

the difference on that last one is how we do it. i do it through ruthless optimism and pushing myself to be better every day. kaiba does it by climbing over people that he perceives to be in his way and using them as metaphorical rungs in the ladder of life.

also: r.e. joey: the reason kaiba hates joey so much is what I said above— joey doesn’t take selfish opportunities and basically does everything he does for the comfort and satisfaction of other people. kaiba was willing to gain what was probably pennies to him in duelist kingdom just to prove his title and the whole reason joey was fighting was for his sister. of course kaiba hates joey— he doesn’t understand why joey is still so low in society with the amount of dueling talent joey has.

kaiba looks at joey and sees what he could have been had he not gotten gozaburu to adopt him and then taken over kaiba corp. i’m not saying he’s right for how he treats joey, but I think it’s a little justified in a fucked up way. like, had kaiba not seized every opportunity, he would still have been in the orphanage when the show started. (idk how orphanages work in japan bear with me) he thinks that joey is too selfless and it’s hurting him. in some ways, that makes joey and kaiba perfect foils: joey, too selfless, and kaiba, too selfish.

so I don’t blame kaiba for not liking joey. I think his treatment of him is unfair and I think it’s kaiba taking his anger and trauma out on the closest available emotional punching bag, but I understand it. (i used to do that a lot to my adoptive parents because i think I saw them as the cause of my situation, even though they never did anything to intentionally hurt me.)

he needs SO MUCH therapy, though. #getkaibatherapy2023 (i do, too, but I acknowledge that and I’m working on my issues.)

I also think Kaiba had to grow up way too fast, which is actually pretty common in adopted kids. we either 1. strike out against our adoptive parents because we’re angry at losing our family or 2. conform so neatly to our new family that we fail to realize that we are separate entities from our parents. obviously those are the two extremes. kaiba is one of those cases that sits at both ends. he systematically destroys his adoptive father while also becoming so much like him that even kaiba doesn’t notice what he’s become.

…

…

I know we make fun of kaiba every time he smiles “oh no, kittens are dying” but there’s nuance to that.

…

…

does kaiba treat smiles as a reward?

I know I used to.

…

…

and if kaiba is anything like me

(which he is)

(I see a lot of myself in him, which scares the hell out of me while simultaneously comforting me because maybe I have a chance, right?)

then the love of his little brother is a privilege that he will never take for granted. in fact, he’s so scared of losing it that mokuba is his one weakness. if someone threatens my family, I come out swinging.

…

anyway, thanks kazuki takahashi for giving this little adoptee someone other than Annie to look up to.

goodnight.

#yugioh #yugioh duel monsters #seto kaiba #i really should be sleeping #but i wrote this rant instead #rant #ramblings #i need sleep #kaiba seto #ALSO ALSO: the blue eyes white dragon card #which mokuba made him the original fake one #i would bet you all of kaiba’s money that he still has that shit #adoptees tend to be more material #because we see the world as things that exist and things that dont #yay trauma response #so he’s definitely got that fake blue eyes to remind hiimself of mokuba’s love #like i made my mom record my favorite bedtime songs before i went to college #scared of forgetting her voice and her love #it’s the same principle #also also also: adoptees tend to take power and control whenever we can because we are scared of not having it #r.e.: kaiba taking over KC and needing to destroy the fourth blue eyes card #i’m done #goodnight #i made myself cry