#and this may just be a sappy song idk but it spoke to me this way | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

multiplefandomsblog · 3 years

Text

request; Shuichi and his fem!s/o take each other virginity?

pairing(s); shuichi x AFAB! reader

warnings; post-game saihara, saihara has some PTSD from the killing game but it is not heavily mentioned, cussing AFAB! reader, soft dom! Shuichi, vanilla-ish, intense kissing, mention of marriage, hurt/comfort-ish?, angst-ish?, petty arguments, sexual frustration, they both losing their v-card, shuichi picks you up, shuichi reads porn mags but not elaborated here, established relationship, they've been dating 6 months btw, they're living together, cyring, begging, accidental overstimulation, self-indulgent, irresponsible and unprotected sex(always wrap it before you tap it you fucking idiots), unedited but used spellcheck. OKAY I KNOW 6 MONTHS IS REALLY SHORT AND I HAD A DIFFERENT IDEA IN MIND BUT I JUST DBHSBJHSBD IM SORRY THIS IS JUST SUPER MESSY

note; i rushed the end and this is kind of garbage(god please don't read this), but here's a few songs that i listened to while writing this;

505 - Arctic Monkeys & Cute Panties Soaked In Arizona Iced Tea - Sewer//Slvt & a bunch others idk

wc; 5.8k+

You both dabbled in the idea of having sex, having shared mutual trust and desire for each other within the early stages of your love-filled relationship.

Even so, the obvious statements were left unsaid, and the obvious desire you both have for each other’s bodies had been left alone, never to be picked up again.

Now don’t underestimate yourself, there would be some not-so-rare make-out sessions when you both got into the mood and made sure to give each other ‘the look’, but they’d always end in Shuichi stiffening up and asking if you’d like to stop.

And like an idiot, you had always said the same goddamn thing, the opposite of what you wanted to say. “Sure, y- yeah.” Always praying he wouldn’t hear the disappointment in your voice. You didn’t want him to be upset that you wanted to continue, because wouldn’t that just be selfish of you?

Your prayers always seemed to be answered anyway, though mostly carried by Shuichi’s helplessly obvious nature; he ate it all up.

But maybe you should’ve been praying for the opposite because otherwise, you wouldn’t be here right now.

Maybe it was the stress from the fact that Shuichi’s boss yelled at him today, maybe it was from the fact that he had one of his colleagues accidentally file one of the most important cases, improperly, maybe it was because you both hadn’t fucked in 6 months.

Well, whatever it was, it had Shuichi fuming.

“This? Again?” Shuichi sighed in an attempt to calm himself, his face lacking the patience it usually held.

“What do you mean ‘again’!? I’ve told you this, tons of times before!” To be fair, you had no idea why you had been so angry either, but before you could even think or hold yourself back, random arguments you truly never cared about had been brought up.

What the hell were you two even fighting about?

Despite your mind screaming at you to stop, your mouth continued to act first. “God, why don’t you ever listen to me? You know, sometimes it seriously just feels like I’m talking to a brick wall when I talk to you.” That wasn’t true.

“Is that right?” He didn’t know what came over him. “Well, if we’re talking about our talking habits, I think you sometimes talk too much; it’s hard to keep track of what you’re saying sometimes, and it just- it brings me a headache…!” That wasn’t true either; he was a detective, he listened to every single detail you spoke out from those beautiful lips. Shuichi would listen as intently as he would during an investigation as he gathered information from perps.

But you didn’t know that. You had been too busy reeling from his previous statement to remember all the nice moments you had before this. His words felt like acid on your palpitating heart. Did you talk that much?

You gulped, lip trembling without your consent. “Y- yeah?”

No, I didn’t mean any of it. Please don’t look at me like that. “... Yeah.” Shuichi averted his eyes as he lied for no good reason.

You nodded in feigned indifference, chewing the inside of your cheek as you attempted to walk past him and outside the kitchen — to which he immediately stopped you, an urgency laced within his actions. Sudden anxiety wracked his body, and images of the previous executions flashed in his mind.

You couldn’t go.

With his eyes wide in a slight panic, they narrowed back to their normal width as he took a deep breath, pulling you towards him and suddenly pushing his lips on yours. “Shu-” he blanketed any open space for noise to escape through with his lips, kissing you with desperation you’ve never witnessed firsthand.

Despite your internal concern for him, your hands slipped up his shoulders to the back of his neck, pushing him closer to you than he already was on instinct.

Okay… This was okay. It was better than fighting, that was for sure.

You were confused by the sudden display of physician affection, but you could only get a little of you to care; you missed him. It had only been 5 minutes into the fight, yet you had been pulling him close like you hadn’t seen him in a year. Luckily for both you and him, he missed you too. He didn’t like fights. Especially not meaningless ones like these.

You both didn’t know how, nor when, but before you knew it, you had been sitting atop the kitchen counter, legs wrapped tightly around Shuichi’s waist as his hands gripped yours. A familiar, heavy feeling of arousal pooled up at your stomach, remaining there like an itch you knew only Shuichi could scratch. Shuichi was comfortably close for you to somewhat feel his phone poke at your thigh, but even so, not close enough. Clothes started to feel restricting, and you both shared the same need to just tear them off, but

—

“S/o,” he muffled on your lips, trying his best to try and pull away from your captivating lips on his, though it was incredibly hard with those velvety lips of yours.

“S/o!” The bad feeling in his stomach grew, and he suddenly realized it had been because he didn’t want such a special moment for the two of you, to be spoiled by a petty fight neither of you would remember in a few days. He didn’t want your shared story to be an argument that leads to sex. Call him a hopeless romantic but, that simply didn’t sit right with him.

Shuichi pulled away abruptly, apologizing under his breath as he avoided eye contact with a slightly puzzled you. “I…” He started nervously, gently nestling his forehead atop your beating heart in an attempt to self-soothe himself.

"I don’t want us to finally, um, do... This out of- of anger and- S/o, you have to know that I love you so much and that I-” That wasn’t what he meant to say, it didn’t come out right, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t think of what he had originally planned to say. His mind was jumbled, words weren’t good enough for him anymore. Shuichi began to prick small unwanted tears at the corner of his eyes as he rambled with sincere intention.

“I don’t want to look back at this day and- Or what if you regr-”

You shook your head frantically before he could finish his sentence, gentle fingertips tapping the underside of his head as you urged him to look into your eyes. You sighed fondly as you swam in those pools of liquid gold, a small, assuring smile contorting onto your face.

“It’s okay, I know, I know you didn’t mean it.” You took another breath as you continued, a deeper inhale. “And I know what you mean but, Shuichi I… No matter what, I could never regret a single thing with you,” His hands tightened around you.

“And frankly, it doesn’t matter how we ended up… Doing this with each other.” It was kind of funny how you both couldn't say the word 'sex'. A three-letter word that may have seemed terrifying to the two of you back then, started to gradually lose its intimidation factor.

“Because as long as you love me, and I love you, that’s all that will matter.” You lightly laughed at how sappy you sounded; wondering if you’d be this romantic when reciting your vows.

You two weren't even married.

But Shuichi would be lying through his teeth if he said he hadn't visualized you in a veil; and wow, did you look amazing.

Shuichi paused, gazing up at you with intense affection, and love for you. You could feel your cheeks heat up from how intently he gazed at you, you couldn't help but slightly shrink underneath his gaze.

Without missing another beat, Shuichi suddenly broke the gaze, and wrapped his arms underneath your bottom, picking you up with a concealed struggle. He'd have thought spending most of his time typing in that office, would give him some sort of arm strength.

Well, you'd find out later, wouldn't you?

Making his way to the bedroom carefully, Shuichi gently set you down on your back, trapping you in between his arms and locking his lips back onto yours soft and slowly, unlike his last pecks.

You could feel your heart rate speed up as he started to run his hand underneath the thin material of your top, and despite the rising anxiousness itching at you, the feeling of love and anticipation easily overpowered the feeling — though not completely.

For a split second, Shuichi pulled away to pull your shirt up and over your head, and the moment his loving, eager golden eyes found their way back to you, he swore he almost suffered a cardiac arrest on the spot.

With your hands resting beside your head, lips swollen and exposed chest heaving; he thought you looked like the most stunning human being that had ever graced this earth.

And he wasted no time showing you how he felt.

Quickly stripping himself of his shirt, you watched in slight amusement as he struggled to throw the material across his room, his eagerness becoming his enemy. He felt the mattress slightly dip and inflate, though he couldn't see anything as his vision was obstructed. Shuichi — despite having a feeling you had sat up and was probably going to help — didn't want to submit into his embarrassment just yet. He could take off his shirts, and he was going to prove it-

His eyes clenched shut in frustration, suddenly shot open as he felt a cool breeze hit his warm face, as well as the sound of quiet laughter.

"C- come on, don't laugh...!" Shuichi complained half-heartedly.

You grinned. "Sorry, sorry," You raised your hands in defence, taken by surprise as

Shuichi pinned the same hands back onto the bed, playfully pecking your face all over before moving down the valley of your neck and collarbone.

You did your absolute best to not laugh as Shuichi had told you to, but you couldn't prevent the huge, goofy smile that broke out on your face. The euphoria of having someone you truly love and trust, showering you with affection, combined with the ticklish feeling of his slightly chapped lips on your neck, had caused you to giggle.

"Is it- Is it really that funny?" Shuichi grumbled, kisses turning into gentle bites as he wanted to get you to make noises that weren't giggles; not that he didn't adore the sound.

Just not in this situation, nor position.

"It's not, I-" You snorted, "I promise! I just, I feel really, really happy right now." You admitted in between laughter.

You felt Shuichi pause against your neck, and your laughter died down as you wondered if you did something wrong.

"Shuichi-?" You squeaked as you felt his warm breath and kisses travel quickly towards your stomach, right above where you wanted it most. You could feel your face heat up, as well as your core, from the mere puff of air.

Your excitement slowly turned to dread as you felt his hands slowly slide down to the waistband of your pants, and without realizing it, you stiffened up. You felt slightly guilty of your reaction; you wanted this, right? You were so excited a moment ago, where did it go? The logical part of you didn't seem to want to chime in and say, 'It's a natural reaction!'

So you settled for chewing your lip in an attempt to distract yourself from the heart-wrenching guilt.

The action hadn't gone unnoticed by Shuichi; he knew that habit all too well. It was a nervous habit, quite often in many people, but it always seemed to drive Shuichi crazy when you did it. He never noticed when others did, as he was constantly too busy staring straight at you like a boy with a hopeless crush.

But look at him now.

Shuichi from 6 months ago probably wouldn't believe the Post-Shuichi, that he had got the chance to be your boyfriend, let alone share such an intimate moment with someone as special as you.

"Hey, look at me," He grinned gently as he caught your attention.

"It's... It's just me here. You don't have to worry, or be nervous because I'm right here, and I... I'll love you no matter what." It was hypocritical to say, as his hands had practically been quivering beyond his control, but he spoke the sincere truth for you.

He watched in slight anxiousness as you stayed in silent, stunned shock. Shuichi started wondering if he should've said something else-

"O- Okay, yeah, you can- You can, um." You didn't mean to sound so awkward, but you hoped the slight eagerness laced in your voice made the message clear enough for him.

Shuichi slipped his thumbs underneath the waistband of your pants, golden eyes focused entirely on your face as to detect any discomfort.

Seeing none, he slipped the rest of it off, growing excited yet also nervous as he saw you for the first time. "You're soaked..." He uttered underneath his breath in stunned awe, unwillingly causing you to jerk your legs shut.

And who's fault is that!? You wanted to say that, but in the condition and position you were in right now, it didn't seem very possible nor ideal.

You let out a small whimper as you felt Shuichi gently encourage your legs back open, a small pout on his face as you hadn't given him enough time to savour the visual.

No words were said, and no words were needed as Shuichi communicated his wanton need for your pussy with nothing but his eyes. Captivated and persuaded by his puppy-dog eyes, you hesitantly opened your legs back up, silently gasping as you felt the cold air hit your glossy folds yet again.

Your momentary shock faltered into embarrassed confusion as you caught Shuichi staring at it with a thoughtful gaze. It was strange; you felt like an animal at the zoo up for display to just... Stare at.

But perhaps the most embarrassing thing about the whole thing was the stars in his eyes as he watched you twitch and shudder. “Sh- Shuichi.” You tried to snap him out of his gaze, face growing hotter and hotter as time passed by with him continuing to stare at your impatient pussy.

“I’m just going to… Put one in.”

If there was anything Shuichi had learned from the numerous articles on how to please your partner during sex, is to always prep them.

“Wait, huh-?"

His finger sunk in easily, prodding finger slipping into a pillowy bundle of nerves; it was like heaven on earth for Shuichi, and he wanted to make sure it felt the same for you.

"Hah- Nnnn!”

Your loud moan snapped him out of his trance, and unfortunately, he had reacted a moment too late as his finger had already been knuckle deep.

Experiencing a mini panic attack, guilt overwhelmed his body, and he moved to pull out, only to be caught by surprise as you caught his wrist right before he could.

"N- No...! It's- It's okay, mmngh- Just- just feels good, is all." You were glad you hadn't lost the complete ability to speak yet; because that'd surely be humiliating, wouldn't it?

Shuichi tensed his hand unintentionally, causing you to jolt slightly as you could feel every single movement. Shuichi's eyes widened in realization and guilt at your sudden reaction.

"A-Ah, sorry! I didn't mean to-" He cut himself off, head tilting as you moaned a little too loud for your taste — but not loud enough for his.

Shuichi shifted himself, so his face was hovering over your blissed-out one, slight confusion taking over your features as he seemed to be watching you carefully, almost as if he was expecting something —

With a sharp inhale, you felt your hole swallow in another finger, the pleasure now doubled up. If this is what fingering felt like... Then you'd have to assume the main course felt 5x as good as this, right?

Your hands shot up to his shoulders to dig your nails into, the pleasure finally becoming too much as he started experimentally moving in and out slowly.

Shuichi would've asked, 'Is this okay?' but judging by your moans and pleas for more, he concludes he has his answer.

Running his thumb down your folds, Shuichi decided he would explore your pussy as he continued his slow thrusts in your clenching hole — and what better way to do that than to accidentally brush his fingers against your clit?

You nearly sobbed, climax rising alarmingly close, before dropping as Shuichi continued with his exploration.

"Shuichi! T- There! Right there! Please!" You repeated like a mad man, nearly jolting up if it wasn't for Shuichi's body that loomed over you.

With a confused, but obedient nod of his head, Shuichi tested the waters yet again, eyebrows furrowing as he pressed around in random spots. "Ah!" His eyes widened in slight achievement as he watched you start to violently spazz out the moment he pressed onto a button-like nerve.

"C- Coming, I'm- I'm comin- Ahnn!" Shuichi began roughly circling his thumb over the bundle of nerves, unknown of how sensitive the nerve was, and unknowingly forcing you into overstimulation.

"Sh- Ah- W- Wait!" You stammered, squirming away from his unrelenting hand, unsure as to why it had felt as strong as it felt. "Wait, please!" Shuichi suddenly pulled away from your clit, panic taking over his body yet again as he carefully picked you up and slipped you onto his lap.

"I- I'm sorry...! I didn't... Are you- Are you okay?" He stuttered, eyes wide with concern.

Had he gone too far? Was he missing something? Maybe there was a spot you didn't like?

You shook your head, doing little to assure the rising storm of worry you knew Shuichi would accumulate.

"I- I'm okay, it felt good. I think you just overstimulated me a bit but," You brought your arms around his neck, scooching your partially numb ass over his erection.

"... Not like I didn't like it." You grinned lopsidedly, leaning up to capture his lips into a passionate kiss, one filled to the brim with ever-lasting passion. He wasted no time to reciprocate, face slightly reddening as he groaned from the slightest pressure of your thigh pressing down against his erection.

"Sorry...-" Shuichi slipped in an apology, before quickly being sent back into the depths of your touch.

"Don't be-" You countered, letting one of your hands run down the crevices and nooks of his scrawny chest and stomach, down to trace his faint V-line.

"Mm-" An unplanned moan slipped out, and the blush on his cheeks worsened. He was sensitive, and that was to be expected for a first-timer. Though Shuichi refused to believe it was his sensitivity, but your soft touch.

Jolts of pleasure shot up his spine, and his pants only grew tighter, to the point where his brain was screaming at him to take them off.

Lucky for him, you complied without another thought.

You broke the kiss, resting your forehead against his chest as you hunched over to unbuckle his pants. The breathy and beautiful sounds of Shuichi panting like a dog-in-heat above you only made your fingers work faster. The sound of his zipper being pulled down hit his ears, and his eyes clenched tight shut as he felt a curious hand fiddle with his boxers.

"Can I...?"

He nodded frantically, an adorable eagerness overtaking control of his actions.

As you slipped your hand into the binds of his grey-scale boxers, you weren't sure what you were going to see, or how he would feel once you got your hands on his stiff length.

Shuichi wasn't sure what he was expecting either, but expectations didn't matter when you were with each other, right?

"H- Hnnnn...!"

Well, even so, he sure as hell wasn't expecting his strained whine he let out the moment your hand coiled around the base of his cock. With his whine unintentionally egging you on, you decided to pull it out all the way, curious to see him.

God, if you were to laugh now, he'd probably die.

The truth was, you weren’t sure if you could physically laugh, nor breathe…. Or even speak for that matter. He rendered you speechless, and as he tried to read your expression, he found himself praying the silence was a good thing. Though before the thick, lust-filled air could suffocate you both, you decided to voice your thoughts.

“W- Will that fit…?” Your face was probably as hot as a pizza pocket fresh out of the oven.

Now, you weren’t sure what a real dick looked like; you hadn’t seen one in real life before, so maybe it was average in dick sizes, but you couldn’t help but shudder from uncontrollable excitement combined with the fear of that thing tearing into you.

Shuichi noticed the look of fear on your face, and his instinct kicked in; nervosity and anxiety went as he focused on your needs instead, something he’d always done, to an almost unhealthy point.

You let yourself fall back onto the mattress yet again, your head that had been lost in its own thoughts, hitting the plush pillows as Shuichi softly guided you comfortably down. It seemed only now did you realize you were completely bare to Shuichi, head to toe, naked. What a convenient time.

Shuichi’s T-Shirt struggles couldn’t distract you now, and so there you sat, avoiding eye contact with the worried boy as you shrunk further into yourself. You were ready, you repeated to yourself. But perhaps your true fear had been, was he ready for you?

His voice broke the upsetting silence, and out came the words you didn’t want to hear. “If you’re having doubts, we don’t have to do this today, or ever, for that matter.” Shuichi was so close to you, you could practically hear the sound of his little heart beating unevenly. Your hand subconsciously lifted and set itself on his chest to try and feel the small hum and vibration of his heart, and for a second you almost forgot what he had asked.

“I… Shuichi, I want this but,” You weren’t sure how to explain, and a part of you wished he could just read your mind and tell you exactly what you wanted to hear. But relationships weren’t that easy.

“I… What if I dissatisfy you? Like, what if I’m too small, or too loose, or- or what if how I look impacts the experience; are you sure you want to have your very first time with someone like me? Like-” Shuichi cut you off with his lips, the desire for you to stop talking about things that would never happen, as well as the desire to kiss you, combining into this moment.

The man wore an expression of pure earnestness; the confidence he had almost scared you. “I love you so much, and none of that matters to me. I promise you, none of that will ever happen.” His voice was heartbreakingly sincere, to the point where you felt guilty for doubting him.

He, honest to god, understood how you felt completely. Shuichi was afraid he would cum too early, or if he wasn’t long enough, or girthy enough- He was terrified of ruining your first experience with him, he just didn’t want to look the emotion because he was afraid diffidence wasn’t sexy.

Maybe it was ridiculous, but to be fair, your assumption of yourself dissatisfying him was even more so.

Not trusting your own voice to speak, you simply averted your eyes and nodded, exhaling slowly as you tried to push your doubts away. Shuichi followed your gaze, using a gentle hand to tilt your head back to face him, wanting you to look at him as he finally puts it in.

“I’ll go… really slow, okay? Tell me if you want me to stop, okay baby?” You went beet red at the new pet name, but before you could counter his sneaky remark, your voice and breath were stolen from you as you felt something warm throb at your entrance. Was that his —

“Sh- Shit...!” You hissed, eyes clenching tightly shut to conceal the small tears prickling at the corners of your eyes. You were right, it was going to hurt.

Shuichi had only slipped in the tip of his cock, marvelling at how easily it sunk in at fault to your slick. He bit back several low moans that threatened to spill out of his mouth, God, you felt so warm inside. Perhaps it was a gross thought, but Shuichi hadn’t exactly been thinking anymore, eyes clouded and nearly crossed from the intense, foreign but pleasing feeling.

“H- How does It feel this good…?” He slipped quietly to himself, eyes lidded as he lost himself in your embrace.

Gulping harshly, he stilled his hips and tore his eyes away from your walls that hugged him so snugly, shifting his attention instead to your pained expression. With a hushed and strained voice, Shuichi voiced several shy but sincere praises and assurances.

His bony hands travelled up from your hips, to lace your hands, fingers shakily lacing your fingers together. Shuichi found himself sighing in relief as he could feel your stiffness slipping away, squeezing your hand as a reminder that he was proud of you for it.

“Do you want me to move?” Shuichi asked, worried eyes darting to your concealed ones.

You pursed your lips, hesitating to shake your head no. You knew they couldn’t stay like that forever — Well, Shuichi probably would’ve if you told him to, but you couldn’t do that to him. Then again, you were still trying to get used to the painful yet filling intrusion in between your legs.

You were on a mental crossroad, unsure of what to say in response to such a simple question. And great, now you left him too long without a reply; the poor guy was just laying there. You could hear your brain screaming at you to just say something! Just fucking say something-!

Shuichi noticed your slight discomforted expression, as well as feeling you tense underneath him. A light bulb went off in his head as he thought of a way to make it all better, and he opened his mouth to speak once again.

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay, just um… Just trust me, okay?” You felt him squeeze your hands again, to which you squeezed back, voice caught in your throat.

You trusted him, of course, you did. What if he didn't know how much you trusted him? You would put your entire life in his hands, you would jump off a cliff if he told you it was safe.

Your lifeline spoke up again, "Take a deep breath and then exhale at three. R- Ready?"

You nodded, taking the deepest breath you could.

"One," Shuichi whispered.

"Two," You felt your shoulders relaxing.

"Three." As soon as your entire body sunk into the sheets, relaxing completely, he sunk the rest of his length inside you, pushing harshly against your hands pinned on the bed for leverage. Shuichi had been holding his breath as to not moan too loud, despite the foreign feeling, it almost felt like it was meant to be like this. Would it be cheesy if he thought fucking you was his destiny?

You gasped sharply, eyes shooting open as your jaw dropped, silent screams escaping your mouth as your back arched into him.

"Ah- Ah!" Your strained moans grew louder as the stretch finally registered within you. A bead of sweat formed on your forehead as you squeezed his hands tightly, wanting to pull him closer.

Shuichi didn't say anything, biting down on his lip and nearly drawing blood as he bottomed out, his balls clapping gently on the tender skin of your ass.

You couldn't help but whine uncontrollably the feeling being too much. You could feel everything. The small curve of his perfect cock, the feeling of his tip pulsating into your walls and every goddamn accidental shift of his Shuichi’s hips.

With his hips pressed as close as they could be against yours, you had no choice but to wrap your legs around his waist, heels bumping against his tail bone as you did such.

Everything seemed to slow after a couple of seconds filled with breathy silence, your heart rate slowing down as well. The stretch remained, but the pain slowly melted away with every exhale you took, pleasure and need overtaking it instead. “Sh- Shuichi.” After hearing your voice so brittle, Shuichi lifted his head from your shoulder in urgency and concern. “Y- Yeah? D- Don’t worry, I won’t move until y-”

“N- No, you can- You can move, it- I want it.” You stammered over your words, suddenly shy as you pleaded for him. It was embarrassing to be begging for something so lewd, but you’d soon learn that embarrassment wasn’t valid when you were screaming your lungs out.

You’d wonder why you were both suddenly so timid with each other, treating each other like fragile glass that could break if you arose your voice too high.

Nodding uncertainly at your words, Shuichi gave your hands one last reassuring squeeze unsure if he had done that to assure you or him.

With a shaky inhale, Shuichi tested the waters by rolling his hips against yours gently. Worrying whether he was doing it right, as well as worrying if he hurt you. Though he’d be lying if the worry didn’t somewhat slip his mind the moment he felt that nearly irresistible wave of bliss wash over his body. Not wanting the feeling to stop, Shuichi decided he’d do it again, causing you to moan louder than the first time.

He couldn’t help but feel something strike his heart, and before he knew it, he was thrusting harder, more, aiming in different directions to get you to moan louder.

“Hah!” It was a foreign feeling, but that didn’t necessarily mean it was a bad thing. You could feel your heart pulsating, a thin layer of sweat cultivating on your skin and his, and most of all you could feel Shuichi moving inside you. Every inch of him rubbed against your walls, and all of it just felt so fucking addicting.

“S/o!” His call for your name had lost itself in the sea of your moans as well as his own.

You could only reply in rickety moans, body bouncing as each thrust he granted upon you pushed your head closer to the headboard; the only thing keeping you as close as you were to Shuichi, being your connected hands.

“Sh- Shuichi, fuck!” You couldn’t even remember your name anymore, the name of your lover rolling off your tongue a couple of hundred times as your eyes rolled into the back of your skull, his hard pace driving you to insanity. You couldn’t even recognize yourself anymore, moans that escaped your lips sounded so pornographic you couldn’t possibly assume those were yours.

Shuichi on the other hand had been moaning and grunting like he was in pain; the way your walls clenched around him had brought him closer and closer to his high, but he didn’t want to cum just yet. He wanted to get that sweet spot.

It was so incredibly gratifying every time you called out his name; maybe not-so for the neighbours, but he couldn’t help but feel slightly smug as his neighbours would’ve known that it was — “Shuichi!” — who had been making you wail and moan like that.

Your uncertainty and discomfort from earlier disappeared into thin air, forgotten forever as you lost yourself in this new feeling of being plowed like a cornfield.

Finally finding the energy and courage to pry open your tear-filled eyes, your jaw remained slack, mouth blubbering out nonsense and ‘I love you’s as you made eye contact with Shuichi.

You felt your heart stutter and stop a moment as you saw how pretty he looked at that moment. With his facial expression contorting into one of pure pleasure, and a thin layer of sweat making his skin almost seem like it was glowing, combined with the loving look in his eyes; it was all too much, and before you knew it, you made your own lewd expression as you felt a foreign knot suddenly build up and untie in your stomach just as quick.

With stuttered, pathetic attempts at pleading his name, you attempted to get his attention as you had been slightly afraid of what was building up inside you. “Sh- Shu- Some- Something’s- Mmnhah!” You sobbed out, jaw going slack as screams poured out from your throat.

Shuichi’s eyes widened just a fraction as he realized what was happening, slowing his hips before suddenly going faster than before, grunting as he brought himself back to his high. “It’s- It’s okay baby, just let go- Urk—!” Shuichi wheezed as he felt your trembling vaginal walls clamp onto his throbbing length, feeling as if he had just gotten the air punched out of him. Well, you were only following his order.

Hunching over you, he squeezed your hands as he rolled his hips one last time, slow and deep, causing you to elicit a louder scream from the spot he hit. He had to suppress a thankful smile; there it was. He began to dig his glans especially hard into that spot, causing you to sob and squirm from the intense pleasure he had been putting onto you. “S- So good- I- I can’t-” You stammered, mind fuzzy and misfunctioning as your orgasm had been concentrated by Shuichi’s bold action.

You wondered if this was his first time; he seemed so experience like he knew all the right spots to press and prod at.

When really, he just read way too many porn mags.

Shuichi’s breath hitched as he felt his cock twitch, not long after the mini action, he had finally released inside you, going slack over your body as he nearly cried into your shoulder from how good it felt. Desperate and shaky moans and groans spilled from the binds of his thin lips, and no matter how hard he tried to dig himself into your neck, the moans remained loud.

Time seemed to slow down, Shuichi had gone flaccid inside you and quiet as he tried to catch his breath. Despite the lower half of your body still incredibly sensitive and numb, you managed to switch your positions, shifting him, so he was laying on his side instead of you.

He let himself be cradled by you, sweaty skin sticking together in an uncomfortably comfortable way. It was warm.

“... God, we should’ve done that months ago.” You half-joked, voice gravelly.

Shuichi groaned in response, wincing as he pulled out slowly.

“I don’t think I.. regret waiting.” Shuichi truthfully spoke, smiling a lopsided grin.

“Because it made this moment more special… right?” He hoped he wasn’t the only one to think so.

You nodded, eyes eventually drifting shut. “Yeah… You’re right, you’re.. always right.”

391 notes · View notes

krowfics · 3 years

Text

This world is after me, after you

Fandom: MLP:FiM

Ship: Flutterdash

Plot: Rainbow wakes up from a nightmare and she feels like she's back in Cloudsdale, far from safety. Fluttershy comforts her and reminds her that she's safe now.

Words: 1480

Notes: AU where Rainbow has PTSD and moved in with Fluttershy when they left Cloudsdale. Hurt/comfort, flashbacks, nightmares, self harm, past child abuse, Fluttershy is a good marefriend

FiMfiction

~~~

Rainbow Dash sat up with a gasp, her breaths ragged, eyes blown wide with adrenaline coursing through her veins. She needed to go. She needed to run. She needed to fly. She needed to hide. It’s not safe. She’s not safe.

“Honey?”

She looked around the room. Where is her dad? Where did he go? Is he coming back? She should lock the door. He’ll yell if she locks the door. She should hide. She’s not safe.

“Rainbow, sweetie.”

The pegasus turned when she felt something- someone grabbing at her wing. Fluttershy. Fluttershy was here.

“That’s right, honey, I’m here.” The mare’s soft voice spoke.

Why was she here? It’s not safe. She can’t be here.

“You are safe Rainbow.”

No.

“Yes.”

Rainbow gazed at the other for a long moment. She saw those beautiful cyan eyes and the pale coat that was dimmed in the dark of night. Her vision blurred, making it impossible to continue her staring at the other any longer.

“No. No, Rainbow, let go of your wing.” A bit of sternness showed through her voice. Rainbow looked down to see the offending appendage in her grasp. Why was she holding her own wing? She dropped it. “Good.” Rainbow Dash did good. Good.

She flinched hard when she felt something touch her hoof, she opened her eyes - When had she shut them? - and saw Fluttershy’s hoof being pulled away from where it had tried to hold hers, “Wait- Don’t-” Rainbow managed, reaching out to grasp the hoof between her own forehooves, “Mine.” she mumbled.

“Okay.” Fluttershy said, “Okay, it’s okay, I’m not going anywhere.”

Go. They needed to go, it isn’t safe. Rainbow just held the hoof tighter.

“We’re going to turn the lights on, o-”

“No!” Rainbow winced at the loud noise that came from herself, “No,” She said much quieter, “We- we can’t. He’s- He’ll-”

“Oh, oh, fledgling. Come here.” Fluttershy concern was clear even as she whispered, “We won’t. We won’t turn the lights on.” She promised.

Rainbow let herself be folded into the arms of the other, unable to hold back hiccups that boarded on sobs. She clung to the other’s hoof as tight as she dared. She needed to keep Fluttershy safe, it wasn’t safe. She muffled her whimpers in the yellow pegasus’ neck and felt one of Flutters’ hooves on the back of her head, slowly petting her mane. Two yellow wings wrapped around her comfortingly.

“Rainbow,” She could feel the vibration of Fluttershy’s voice against her, “Do you know who I am?”

Rainbow nodded barely, face still pressed against the crook of the other’s neck.

“Can you tell me?”

“Fluttershy.” She whispered.

“Yes, that’s right. Good.” Fluttershy said she was good, that’s good. “Can you tell me where we are?”

Where are they? Where was this? She was in a bed. The blanket was still covering her back hooves, she could feel it when she shuffled her legs. She was home. “Home.”

“Where is home?”

Where?

They were yelling. They were yelling and screaming and she wasn’t good, she was bad. They were screaming at her that she was bad. They were going to hurt her. He was going to hurt her.

And now she was in bed. Fluttershy was in bed with her.

“Cottage.” She said eventually, “Ponyville.”

“Yes.” Fluttershy said with relief, “We’re in our cottage in Ponyville. We’re safe. You’re safe.”

Rainbow pulled back, just enough to look at the other, “Safe?” She said more to herself than anyone else.

“Yes, safe.” Fluttershy confirmed, loosening the hold her wing’s had on the other mare.

Rainbow Dash looked around the room, dimly lit by moonlight and alive with worry. Animals blinked up at her from every corner. She was having a nightmare that wasn’t real and she’s safe now, “We can turn the light on.” She said, she winced as she realized how scratchy her voice was from crying.

“Okay,” Fluttershy said, “Angel?” She turned, and the rabbit in question gave an audible huff but jumped up and flicked the switch.

Rainbow jerked her hoof over her eyes at the blinding sensation. The other hoof was still holding Fluttershy’s, she realized, “Sorry,” She mumbled but couldn’t find it in herself to let go, “The thought of losing you scares me.” Her voice cracked a little at those words. SHe wasn’t going to cry again. She wasn’t.

“You have nothing to apologize for, I’m not going anywhere.” Fluttershy said again, she turned to another animal, the whole room was filled with them at this point, likely concerned after hearing their conversation, if you could even call it that, “Could you get her a glass of water, please?” She asked.

“I’m sorry I woke you up.”

“You were having a nightmare.”

“I still woke you.”

Fluttershy looked at her, a little incredulously, “I’m glad you did, I wanted to help you. You would do the same for me. You do the same for me when I have panic attacks.”

She did. She’d do anything for Fluttershy. Rainbow would fly to the end of Equestria and back for the mare, she would chop off both her wings if it meant helping the other, and of course she’d help her through any nightmare or panic attack at the drop of a feather.

Speaking of wings.

Rainbow flexed hers awkwardly, wincing in pain. Fluttershy looked at her sympathetically. A trio of two birds and a squirrel somehow managed to work together and bring a glass of water to Fluttershy’s side of the bed, “Thank you,” said the kind pony, she held the glass up to Rainbow, “Drink this, I’ll go get the… Oh.”

She smiled and Rainbow Dash followed her gaze to see that two ferrets had jumped onto the foot of the bed, dragging the first aid kit from the bathroom along with them.

“Thank you.” Fluttershy said, giving the water to Rainbow so that she could pick up the box. Rainbow drank, despite feeling like there was a pit in her stomach. She downed the cup in a few gulps and reached over to set it on the bedside table.

Fluttershy had gotten out cream and whatnot to sooth the painful places that once held feathers. Rainbow didn’t know why she pulled out feathers, it didn't make any sense for someone who liked flying so much to do even subconsciously. Apparently it was something with stress and over grooming and was common among anxious pegasi, but all that meant for her was that she may not be able to fly well for a few days if the episode was too bad. That sucks but also doubly sucks considering she’s a weather pony, her job literally requires flight.

She let the other mare treat her like she would one of her animal friends, like she’d done countless times before. Rainbow Dash just watched her work, staring intently at a honestly barely noticeable bald patch with a cotton swab in her grasp, laying some medication on it. Rainbow only pulled out two feathers this time, she’d be fine as long as she didn’t get an infection, and Fluttershy would see to it that she wouldn’t.

Fluttershy. Fluttershy the mare who helped her through every flash back, who helped her escape from that Celestia forsaken place, who cared for innocent animals with as much gusto as she cared for other ponies. Fluttershy, the love of her life. She was kind, and she was wonderful, and she hummed a soft little tune as she capped the medication and set it back with the supplies to give back to the ferrets.

“I love you.” Rainbow breathed, not really trying to say anything, but she could hardly worry about it when it was so true.

Fluttershy smiled at her, “I love you too, fledgling,” She said, placing a kiss on Rainbow’s forehead, “Would you like to go back to sleep?”

Rainbow nodded and Fluttershy slipped under the blanket with her, “Angel?” Rainbow heard her say, and the light turned off, “Thank you, Angel bunny. And every critter, thank you for helping, goodnight.” There was chittering and chattering in response and Rainbow couldn’t help but smile at that.

Fluttershy hummed, finally laying down with her, “What’re you thinking about?”

“You.” Rainbow said, “You’re perfect, I don’t know what I did to deserve you.” She said, a bit sappily, but how could she not be sappy when she had the best pony ever sharing the heat of a bed with her.

“You’re just as perfect.” Fluttershy said, continuing before Rainbow could argue otherwise, “Perfect for me. We’re perfect for each other. You know, we’re meant to be.” She said softly, laying a wing over the blue pegasus to pull her closer.

“We are, aren’t we?” Rainbow grinned.

“Mhm.” The mare agreed, her eyes already shut as she began to succumb to sleep, “Good night, honey.”

“Good night, Flutters.”

~~~

I used this prompt list and a random number generator to get

1“You know we’re meant to be.”

2“The thought of losing you scares me.”

9“Mine.”

I also got a random song from a playlist (that was the mcr discography, so not that random) for inspiration and got Bulletproof Heart. Don’t tell the ppl over at FiMfiction that that’s where I got the title from, I’m 99% sure I’m breaking a rule- aaa-

also i literally have so much for this au so, i might write more,,, idk,,

#thekrowiswriting #mlp fan fiction #flutterdash #hurt/comfort #fluttershy #rainbow dash #self harm tw #trauma tw #flash backs tw #past child abuse

16 notes · View notes

headcanons-everywhere · 7 years

Conversation

who are these pretty people alex

GingAle - Today at 12:14 AM

dude's Josiah, gal is Olivia, aka Olive!

its a long road until they get together but

when/if they do, there will be sappy junk like

"my little olive" n shit bc anything cheesy you can imagine happening in an old timey / worn down sea-side town?

theyd do it

and will do it

but the idea came from History of Violence by Jason Webely (gr8 song, comes from "100 years ago tomorrow" abt a real historical event its p dark but rlly neat imo)

https://jasonwebley.bandcamp.com/track/a-history-of-violence

that song

n so far, josiah is a tired boy working odd jobs on and off various ships, never leaving the port on them but just doin stuff like matience / cleaning / loading and/or unloading the ship's cargo / etc

other odd jobs are usually tranporting stuff throughout the town for various markets n such, like hauling bags of flour from a ship to the local baker for example, stuff like that

kappital - Today at 12:19 AM

ooOOOOO

that's really cool!! and they're both really cute 80

GingAle - Today at 12:20 AM

n its a really worn down sea-side town almost built in a boardwalk sort of way where you could literally go to the edge of town and hop down the side of the small cliff-like area (which is barely 6 feet high at most prolly) and land in the long stretch of the beach area n watch the waves n shit, which he does in his (rare) free time

thaN K :Dc

only uh

thing

being

hes lowkey traumatized

ok more highkey

kappital - Today at 12:21 AM

FUCK

GingAle - Today at 12:21 AM

highkey traumatized bc, at least as far as im thinkin rn, if shit goes down with battles n what not, its kind of a "all hands on deck" (no pun intended) situation for the town

where any man 12 and over will basically be pulled into it one way or another while the wives n children try to care for eachother and the wounded

which, in itself is already kinda fucked right

WELL

at 17, he was one of these guys pulled into battle for whatever was happening

but you're never told much

just

get out and fight, protect your own and the town, yadda yadda

so he was basically handed a gun and told go

so go he did and he

never really handled a gun before that

and didnt want to be part of it

but somehow found himself towards the front of it all aaaand

kinda

shot a dude on a ship of the ones supposedly invading the town to start shit or w/e

and watched him fall foward and off the ship into the water n hes always haunted by that day

n if it wasnt enough

kappital - Today at 12:24 AM

GingAle - Today at 12:24 AM

it was speculated afterwards that it mayve not even been an attack

it mayve been a misunderstood trade ship or w/e

kappital - Today at 12:25 AM

god dammit

GingAle - Today at 12:25 AM

so he may have just been shoved into a battle of innocent people and he himself took at least one of those lives

so thats haunting his ass atm

and on top of THAT

he lives with his grandfather whos a p cold / quiet person, but will often praise him for what he did that day

which only fucks with him more bc its like "why would u praise me for killing a possibly-innocent person when i never wanted to be in that mess in the first place" n the grandfather shrugs it off bc hes one of those people thats a die hard believer in "War Is The Only Language Left To Speak" and "Protect Your Own At All Costs" n shit so thats fun

buT rn hes just

cargo boy, odd jobs here n there

and oblivious to olivia's crush on him

which is where she comes in

watching this dude carry like 4 bags of flour at once across his shoulders n its like that moment where they look intense and u see the sweat dripping off their face and everythings in slow motion as she sees him n its like

shes seeing Glowing Halo Of God Shining Upon This Boy Whos Probably An Angel Himself

while the most hes seeing a nap in the near future

is a *

sO YEAH she sees him around often being it a small "everyone is everyones neighbor" kinda town and flustered every time

flusters*

kappital - Today at 12:30 AM

shes head over heels for traumatized buss boy

GingAle - Today at 12:30 AM

YEAH HONESTLY

shes the kind of flustered where if theres a flower cart at the local market or somethin and she sees him

she just

not-so-causally-yet-tries-to-not-look-so-suspicious-ly hauls ass to hide behind the large display of flowers

like u wouldnt notice

bc she just

daintily walks over there a lil faster than her normal pace

but if u saw her face directly u would see her Suffering(tm)

like that red faced "oh fuck oh no oh no oh shit fuck fUCK SHIT FUCK FUCK --"

kinda look as shes internally panicking in hoping he doesnt see her staring

bc even behind the flowers

shell glance over

and be staring

kappital - Today at 12:33 AM

shes relatable

GingAle - Today at 12:33 AM

;Dc

kappital - Today at 12:33 AM

I like her

GingAle - Today at 12:33 AM

gOOD

shes overall just a gal trying to survive

both in the sense of day to day life

and also trying to not have a stroke every time she sees him

kappital - Today at 12:35 AM

olivia please

GingAle - Today at 12:36 AM

like legit there have been times where the weather gets hot and hes been working hard so you'll see like, most of his shirt buttons undone to where it shows like most of his torso as hes got this angry-but-in-a-hot-way kinda expression going as hes basically showing off his strength by carrying whatever it is that day on his shoulders like usual

n she just

becomes suddenly!!!! super fucking interested in her bible!!!!

but oh no!!! she forgot her glasses that she doesnt have bc she doesnt actually need them so shes gotta!!! bring that thing up realllly close to read it!!!

totally not hiding her entire face or anything!!!!!

kappital - Today at 12:37 AM

BIBLE

IM CRYING OH NO

oLIVIA

GingAle - Today at 12:38 AM

she carries one around w/ her bc even tho shes not super religious she grew up in a religious family so shes like

casually-religious

buT OH MAN ON THOSE DAYS

SHE JUST

RLLY GETS THE URGE TO RE-READ THE ENTIRE FUCKING THING COVER TO COVER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MARKET PLACE

PRAISE JESUS AMEN HALLELUJAH

TOTALLY NOT PRAISIN JESUS FOR THAT TONED FRAME OF HIS NOOO NEVERRRRR

honestly shed be the kind of person ud see whos like

she sees him doing something especially attrative to her

and she just

reflexivly does the cross motion across her chest bc god help her

literall y

kappital - Today at 12:41 AM

DUDE FUCKIGN

aw I wanna write for them that's really cute

GingAle - Today at 12:41 AM

8Dc !!!

im glaD U LIKE EM AAA

kappital - Today at 12:42 AM

that sucks dude what if she's like

buying seeds for a garden or something and she's about to step out the shop and dude comes in with bags of dirt over his shoulders

but because she's at the door he steps back and holds it with his foot cause shes a lady

like dude she wouldnt be able to breathe dude she would die alex

GingAle - Today at 12:44 AM

YE AH

like shed

no joke

if she had a lot to carry or w/e and she ran into him n he was like "hey do you need help with that seed miss" shed literally just be like

"oh hun u could plant ur seed in my garden at any time"

"what was th--"

"HAHAIGOTTAGOBYE"

kappital - Today at 12:45 AM

shes gonna burn in hell this is BAD

GingAle - Today at 12:46 AM

PRETTY MUC H

if her fam knew like

they arent super strict or anything

but theyre more religious than her

and so if they knew

itd be like

"honey i love you but keep this up and we'll run out of holy water for the next 2 months in under a week from nearly drowning u in it"

like they wouldnt do anything sevear but itD BE

RLLY AWKWARD

n sometHIN WOULD HAPPEN

kappital - Today at 12:47 AM

IM CRYING

GingAle - Today at 12:47 AM

like idk "ur grounded from going to the market for 2 weeks young lady" type stuff

kappital - Today at 12:48 AM

that's not gonna stop the love demon, cupid,

GingAle - Today at 12:48 AM

YEA H

if he ever spoke to her for longer than like, "i just bumped in to you hi whats up" kinda talk, she would probably die

hes not like

josh / emitt oblivious

shes just rlly good at hiding it most of the time

so eventually he prolly catches on like "?? does she??? like me??? wh--" but doesnt act on it

but if they talk n she says "i like you. a lot. like, like-like you."

hed just be like

"i noticed, yeah"

and you would never see a more priceless "O H F U C K" look on her in your entire fucking life

kappital - Today at 12:56 AM

I noticed yeah

you

you fuck don't say that

GingAle - Today at 12:57 AM

wELL

hes rarely interacted with girls s o

hes got not much else under his belt besides blunt honesty and manners

kappital - Today at 12:59 AM

time to get experience fuckhead

GingAle - Today at 1:00 AM

YEA H

kappital - Today at 1:02 AM

what does he do though does he mercy kill her or

GingAle - Today at 1:02 AM

which part :)c ?

kappital - Today at 1:04 AM

after the

confess

GingAle - Today at 1:04 AM

she runs

shes gone

shes "HAHA SO I JUST FORGOT MY MOM WANTED ME HOME BY--WHAT TIME IS IT?? OH JEEZ IM ALREADY LATE HAHA BYE "

she runs

no grave

grace

no dainty "if i act chill he wont notice"

she fucking bolts

kappital - Today at 1:05 AM

I LOVE HER

GingAle - Today at 1:06 AM

high tails it back to her house, hides in her room, doesnt even take off her bonet or anything as she curls up in bed with a pillow to her face, basically screaming

GO OD

i figurred she might be a tad relateable ;D

but yA shes just

yelling, muffled by her pillow

kappital - Today at 1:07 AM

this poor baby

GingAle - Today at 1:07 AM

n josiahs just like

"?? what just??"

"????????????????????????"

kappital - Today at 1:08 AM

jos you fuck

GingAle - Today at 1:09 AM

IKR

he knows shes embaressed but it hasnt like

sunk in yet

like he knows she gets flustered around him n shit

but it really hasnt like

fully hit him on how in love she is with him

until later when they meet up again prolly but like

at that moment he just doesNT KNOW HOW TO REACT

they dont exactly give u "What To Do If A Girl Confesses Her Liking Of You And Then Immideatly Hauls Ass In The Opposite Direction" pamplets at the drug store or anything

kappital - Today at 1:11 AM

that is true

you gotta wing it

GingAle - Today at 1:14 AM

yAH

n he kinda

sucks at that

but they figure it out eventually :)

prolly meet up after he chases down her bonnet or somethin from it flyin off as she was tryina re-tie it or somethin just as cheesy n when he comes back with it they share a few moments where it clicks like

"aw fuck he really does care for me"

"oh my god im actually in love with her o h n o"

etc

n they actually chat for a bit n suRPRISE she doesnt run away this time bc they met up a few times before already

but shes flustered still n her hands are fumbling so he offers to help tie it for her n he does

granted, kinda looks like shit bc he doesnt know how to do the Exact(tm) method for tying it to look nice

but its still a bow

so after a bit from there, they eventually part ways

and when she walks in to her house her moms prolly like "?? honey why is ur bow so sloppy what did you do" n olive's just like "I Love It"

he eventually figures out how to fucking do it right once they actually start dating, but it def takes a few tries :,)

n thats abt all i got rn i thin K

so ya thats them :,y

kappital - Today at 1:26 AM

that's so fucking cute

theyre so

DORKS

dorks

GingAle - Today at 1:26 AM

kappital - Today at 1:26 AM

theyre losers I love them

GingAle - Today at 1:27 AM

im glaD ;*

#H.o.V.#Olivia #Josiah

1 note · View note

godsavemefrombts · 7 years

Text

I Got Love pt. 2

Chapter 2 I Words: 4332 Pairing: ???xreader (It’s Tae x Reader in this ;) ) Genre: Idk? But angst ish?

Rain (Chapter 1) //

She had driven home in a stupor, taken her things out in a trance and entered her home in a daze. Dropping her keys in the bowl by the door, she took off her shoes absent-mindedly, ramming her foot onto the shoe cupboard in the process. Frowning at her own behaviour, she moves away from the shoe rack and places her shoes in their own place, coming out of whatever reverie she was in.

She takes her things deeper into her apartment and puts her guitar in her bedroom, leaving the folder she’d carried with her on her study table and her purse on her dresser. Quickly changing into a football jersey and comfortable boxers which hid under the jersey, she walked out of her bedroom with her phone to fix up a drink for herself. If she had to process all the information she’d gotten that night, she’d have to drink alcohol and push her to believe the turn of events at the cafe.

Walking into the kitchen was a scare as she found a broad-backed male tinkering away next to her sink. “Taehyung…?” she asked, unsure of the identity of the male in her kitchen. Taehyung was her best friend since high school. He was under some music label now that she thought about it… He had always been ecstatic about getting her music to the world too. She’d given Taehyung a spare key long back as soon as she had shifted into the apartment so he had a place to crash at when he didn’t want to go home but instead, this had sort of turned into his second home.

“Hi~” he chirped from his position, not turning to give her time of the day, as he usually did. Y/n just rolled her eyes and approached him and looked over his shoulder to see he was chopping vegetables, probably for his dinner. She slapped his arm till he gave up and moved away, it was no secret that Taehyung usually cut himself more than he cut the vegetables. As y/n took over Taehyung moved to the fridge to take out the other ingredients he’d use to cook. “Beer, right?” he asked as if he knew exactly why she’d come to the kitchen.

But y/n was always that easy to read to Taehyung. So by the time she responded affirmatively, Taehyung had already pulled out a can of draught beer from her freezer and left it on the counter. He moved to the pan and switched on the stove to heat it while y/n finished chopping up the vegetables. Grabbing the tuna can, y/n looked at Taehyung pointedly. “Yes I’ll come with you, I promise, okay?” is all he had to say to hear her chuckle and get her to do his bidding, which was, uncanning the tuna and pressing out all the salt water in it so he could put it in the oil in the pan.

“How was tonight? You said you had that new song to present?” Taehyung asked, his gaze flickering to her for a brief second as he started adding the vegetables into the hot oil. “Hmm yeah, it was good I guess,” was all she uttered contrary to other nights when she found the need to narrate to Taehyung everything that happened, from every breath held to every jaw dropped. Taehyung picked this drastic change immediately but chose not to prod at that moment, choosing to instead concentrate on his food in progress.

As she went back into her dream-like state Taehyung watched worriedly. He knew exactly what had gone down at the cafe that night. He was after all the person who had directed Min Yoongi and Kim Namjoon to that cafe, to her so she could finally find her chance to shine and take it. She needed to get her voice out, it was a waste of pure godsend talent if she didn’t get her voice out. She needed to be recorded, her voice to him, was velvety, enchanting, smooth and above all, heartfelt.

He was a part of YN Music as one of their artists, but she didn’t know that. He had joined just recently and he hadn’t released anything to the public yet. He was planning to in the next few months. Before YN Music, he was the same as y/n, he played at the bar where she was the bartender. A scout had talked to him and he joined them soon after since he knew that was exactly what he wanted but y/n was attached to these lives. It was her drug, it was her reason to live. He understood her hesitation but it wasn’t anything he couldn’t help with.

As soon as he finished cooking, had dished out his food and put it on the dining table to cool, he sat down opposite y/n. It was time she confronted the events that took place tonight and actually spoke about them. The final decision of course didn’t have to be taken now. But she couldn’t let herself be so caught up in it that she would detach herself from her surroundings and even Taehyung because it wasn’t going to do her any good. Her gaze was blank once again, Taehyung realised when her eyes looked up at him, focusing on his face only when he reached across the table to grab her hand. “What happened tonight, y/n? You seem very disturbed.” Taehyung spoke softly, it was a delicate topic for her and he understood.

A small smile stretched across her lips as she heard his voice, low and soft, like a father trying to coax his child into spilling secrets. “Why do you think so Tae? I’m fine, my performance was great, the dinner I had there was definitely better than this, what are you talking about?” She knew there was no use lying, he’d definitely known her for too long to not see through her lies but she didn’t want to tell him about it, since he’d made his decision to sign with a record label as soon as they left college together. He was the brighter of the pair, they both knew but Taehyung was adamant to get her voice out too. She sighed when she registered Taehyung’s deadpan stare after she put down her can of beer after a long swig.

“Okay you know how I was supposed to perform Rain today for the first time, right? I did, and I felt good about it too. It was well received, many came up to me to congratulate me and everything, many loved the lyrics but there-” “Something happened that overshadowed all of this and has shaken you up like this, right?” Taehyung interrupted with a scowl on his face. “Yeah… These two men, Min Yoongi and Kim Namjoon came up to me and asked to sign me into their label, YN Music… I mean, I’ve heard of them but… I don’t know if I want to go into recording immediately or if I want to produce for anyone but myself, you know?” She said, staring at her hands rather than at her best friend.

His hands slipped into her open palms, watching as her eyes travelled up to meet his. He smiled, “Listen y/n, it may not take away your freedom at all. Why don’t you try recording once and seeing how they like your recorded songs? You have to talk to them about the terms, they might let you perform where you want to but trust me, recording and listening to it after it’s processed is a completely different delight.” Taehyung gently squeezed her hands, smiling when she squeezed back weakly. Pulling his hands back, he starts to eat. He’s glad he hasn’t been caught but the day she signs with YN Music, she will get to know about him.

“Oh by the way, there was this song you wanted to put rap in, right? But you can’t rap so you’re not sure what to put in?” Taehyung said as he suddenly remembered something. Seeing y/n nod he smiled again after swallowing his food. “Do you remember Jungkook? He can rap, sort of… You could ask him for help.” Hearing Taehyung, y/n remembered that yes, her junior in college was a golden student who did well in everything and was known to be able to rap. “Yeah you’re right… I think I still have his number, actually.” Y/n nodded as she stared off in the distance.

“Deal. I’m sleeping with you tonight, I hope you’re okay. If you’re not, you can take the couch but I’m really in the mood to cuddle so.” Taehyung narrowed his eyes playfully at her as he stood up with his dishes. He could see her eyelids getting heavier with sleep as she pushed her empty can away. Taehyung smiled at that, walking over to the sink to just soak his dishes in the water.

She drowsily watched his movements, already slightly tipsy due to the alcohol working on her fatigue. Grateful for Taehyung, she wrapped her arms around his waist as he wrapped one of his around her shoulders, guiding her to her bedroom. She pushed him away and plopped on the bed as soon as they reached, immediately crawling to her side and curling up. Taehyung tucked her in gently smiling at her childish antics before going around to the other side of the king sized bed, getting under the covers himself. As soon as he was settled in, he reached out and switched off the lights, turning to wrap his arm around y/n’s waist and cuddle her back to chest. Without another word, both of them fell asleep, wrapped in a warm embrace that both enjoyed.

Next morning, y/n wasn’t surprised by the arm and leg wrapped around her, holding her captive but what did surprise her was the text message waiting on her phone. ‘Take today off. You had your performance tonight too but don’t worry about it. You should take some time off and spend it with yourself. Take it as paid leave and enjoy.’ The manager was really nice but she wondered if it was really okay to accept such kindness. Taehyung groaned from behind her, grabbing the phone away from her. How was he so fast even when he was half-asleep, she couldn’t fathom.

Clearly having read in the next minute he stayed silent, he tossed her phone somewhere and replaced his limbs around her body. “Since you don’t have work today and neither do I, let’s have a lazy day today, yeah? We’ll spend today just appreciating our existence.” Taehyung mused after a while, which made y/n snort. “Appreciate our existence? What the actual fuck Taehyung?” She turned to face him, frowning playfully. “I missed you y/n~” Taehyung spoke chirpily, grinning widely. “I meant, let’s lounge around, make a pillow fort, watch sappy movies and just enjoy the simple pleasures of life like takeout. What do you say?” Taehyung nudged her slightly, his eyes already disappearing with his widening smile.

Sighing in defeat, all y/n can do is chuckle as she responds, “Yeah sure, it’s been a while anyways since I had a day off. Actually, it’s been a while since we both had a day off simultaneously, right Tae?” Her arm naturally drapes around his waist as she braces herself for another round of napping. “Mhm, yeah you’re right. So let’s treasure this, yeah? Just like old times.” Taehyung smiled lazily as he settled back in, to go back to sleep like he guessed y/n was planning.

Old times meant a lot to y/n and Taehyung. It included a lot of things including making coffee for each other early in the morning, making sure they get their work in on time to going to bed in each other’s arms to making dinner on alternative days to sitting down in a park and writing new music down. They did a lot together when they were in college. They tried to part ways but they’d become too attached to each other to let go that easy. So, they stayed in each other’s lives. Maybe they needed a constant, or maybe they just needed each other. Either way, as an occasional occurrence, they often popped into each other’s lives and neither of them questioned the other, because the company was, after all, always welcome.

And that’s how their day proceeded. They slept, woke up, ordered takeout, took turns washing up, watched movies, ate, and just let the time while away for once. They were halfway through their ice cream tub while watching Lion King. “Hey do you wanna try writing songs together later?” y/n asked out of the blue as Simba pranced around on the screen, his majestic mane rustling in the wind.

“Just like old times?”

“Just like old times.”

They both smiled at nothing, digging further into their ice cream.

And that’s how they got there, both sprawled out on the floor, music sheets in front of them, a laptop handy. The only sounds that could be heard were quiet discussions, whispered tunes, scratching of pencils and the tapping of the keyboard. It’s funny how a beautiful tune could be born out of such simplistic circumstances but this was nothing new to them either.

After a verse, a chorus and a bridge, everything went silent. The laptop was shut, the pencils were put away, the sheets were filed. They were done. All they had to do now was write it all out and come up with lyrics. But that could be done another time. And so, they both turned around and lay down on their backs, silently celebrating their achievement of the day.

Taehyung sat up in excitement. Before y/n could even open her mouth to ask what was up, he shushed her, scrolling through his notes on his phone instead. Pulling out one, he gave it to her. It was one of the many songs he had written in lyrics and not bothered with giving it a tune. He usually waited for inspiration to strike for the melody, unlike y/n who decided her chords first and methodically worked through the rest. Not surprisingly, the lyrics went well with the rhythm of the song they had written because it was in the usual common time signature and had the similar Latin rhythm they had ended up achieving in their song with the drumkit notation and rhythm guitar notation they’d come up with in turns. Cliché, but it helped them in the end.

From being lovers to being just a nagging presence in the other’s life, they’ve been through it all. And honestly, at this point of confusion, y/n could only ask for someone like Taehyung, someone who has seen most sides of her if not all, someone whom she can trust and someone who knows her almost better than she knows herself. Taehyung let her chase the whimsical idea of writing a song and record it as she raced out of the study to go grab her guitar. At least he could show her the pleasure of recording something you have written. Maybe after they record it on the shitty voice recorder on the phone, he could make her listen to his studio recorded song that he had once shown her.

When y/n came back into the room, looking like an excited little child with her guitar, his heart warmed in a way it probably shouldn’t have. Pushing his thoughts of her away, and concentrating on the song in front of him, he picked up the filed sheets and his phone. The next fifteen minutes were spent tuning the guitar and their voices to the tune of the song, y/n practising the chord progression on her guitar while Taehyung hummed the melody, both of them concentrating on their respective roles. Sure of herself, y/n stood up and headed to the kitchen, unnoticed by Taehyung to go get some warm lemon and ginger tea for the two of them to help their throats. They had been lazing around the whole day, after all.

When she returned, Taehyung was facing the door, clearly waiting for her to come back. “Hey there,” is what he greeted her with, a lazy smile playing on his lips, the sheets resting on his knees and his phone held in his hand. He gratefully took the cup when it was handed to him, turning his body slightly so he could face her better. They sipped leisurely at their teas, Taehyung demonstrating his vocal skills while they drank. Y/n nodded slowly as she herself started to hum along, trying to harmonise with him well so they could record as soon as possible. “Exciting isn’t this?” Taehyung mused this while y/n hummed the melody for the bridge. “Yeah, I’ve missed this, honestly. I’ve practised many songs but I usually perform live so this excitement is different,” y/n agreed, her features bright and her posture alert.

Taehyung gestured at her to pick up her guitar a while later, when both of them were sure they were ready to sing. Testing her pick against the strings, and her fingers against the frets, she nodded at Taehyung, leaning over to grab her notebook with the chords and placed it in front of her. Taehyung moved to sit next to her, so they could both look at the notes together. Taehyung grabbed y/n’s phone and opened her voice recording app. Locking their eyes, they knew that they were a bit too excited for people who’ve done something as silly as this before. But maybe it was the thrill of doing this together after ages that brought about more butterflies than was needed.

Taehyung pressed record, after which nodding at Taehyung and receiving a nod back, y/n counted them down by rapping her knuckles on the body of her guitar. And they started, y/n played her chords confidently, smiling at the soft sounds that left the sound box of her instrument. Taehyung hummed alongside till it was his turn to sing. Singing the words with his mellow voice, y/n was sure his voice added more meaning to the words than the words originally held. As poetic as the words were, they were also heavy. Taehyung’s voice hid that heaviness, covering it with his baritone melody. Y/n stepped in next as the song flowed along, harmonising with her own mezzo soprano voice, reading from the phone screen which was now situated between the two of them. Her fingers continually flew over the frets, her pick stroking downwards in time with the rhythm that Taehyung was tapping with his foot.

Taehyung’s voice died down as he let y/n sing the next verse, her voice loud now, freed from her vocal chords, unlike her earlier soft voice. Singing about something you’re passionate about or something you can relate to always adds more emotions, right? That’s what Taehyung and y/n were silently hoping for. The heavy words containing insinuations of struggle, the melody set in a major scale with minor undertones, they hoped they were doing it right. Talking about life, the painful changes, the hidden tears, the falls, the unfulfilled wishes, the dreams that stayed dreams, they’re all important. Y/n teared up while singing, because she felt it all.

Her change from being just another performer in a bar on weekends to possibly being a recording artist, her long nights of hoping for a better life, the falls she faced on the way to where she was right now, the wishes she had cut out of her life, the simple pleasures like treating herself to a massage was not possible with her jobs, her dreams of travelling the world, she had almost given up on. But the one dream she hadn’t given up on, was the dream of getting her voice out to the world in all its raw emotions and crude messages.

She didn’t realise she had spaced out till Taehyung turned to her with a smile, her phone in his hand that previously was hanging freely. “We did it?” is what she asked, to hide her present thoughts. “We did it.” Taehyung reaffirmed her, ruffling her hair. “How do you feel? Recording a song you wrote?” Taehyung asked, which actually told y/n what he really wanted to say. “I’ve done it before, Tae. You’ve been with me all this while, thank you.” Y/n was being sincere with her words so she didn’t understand why Taehyung laughed and shook his head. “I’m just being selfish here, but I really want you to consider the offer that was given to you by YN music. It’ll be nice, recording your own songs, letting your voice actually reach out to thousands, even millions of people. I know you can do it, y/n, I know you deserve this too.”

“Are you sure?”

The hesitation on her part was obvious but the vigorous nod she received in response told her she had no reason to. Nodding back at him slowly, she stood up with the music sheets and guitar. “Let’s go have some more food. I’m hungry now,” she winked at him and left. Taehyung chuckled and shot a text to Min Yoongi.

Taehyung: I think I’ve convinced her.

Yoongi: Good. Let’s see.

Taehyung grabbed her phone and went to the living room, discarding their phones there after sending himself the recording. He went on to the kitchen, pulling out a packet filled with takeout from earlier from the fridge. Whistling a tune, he moved about the kitchen to get the food warmed up and ready to consume for the two, happy to finally have brought her mood up, the atmosphere much more relaxed and bright than the dark and lazy atmosphere he had found himself surrounded himself with ever since she had entered the same room the night before. Hearing her sit down at the kitchen table, he just smiled to himself and waited for the microwave to beep and tell him their food was ready, deciding against acknowledging her presence.

Y/n helped herself to two mugs and started brewing coffee in her trusty coffee maker. While Taehyung took all the food to the living room after asking her permission, she poured the hot black coffee into the two mugs, using the right amount of cream for both of them, sparing herself any sugar while she emptied a spoonful in Taehyung’s because she knew that’s how he liked it. Grabbing their drinks, she went back to the living room, situating herself on one end of the sofa, not really bothered to watch the football match Taehyung had put on.

She fiddled with her phone once she gripped it, not noticing that Taehyung already had his in his hand, forwarding the recording he had received from her on to Min Yoongi. He was shameless. He would do whatever he could, just to get her to sign the label, just to get her voice out there, just like he was going to soon. He was desperate. He was living the dream and if he could, he would propel y/n, the girl he was in love with in the past, maybe still was, to live her dream, which was the same as his. They absentmindedly ate away at the bowl of fries which Taehyung had warmed and brought in, while sipping their steaming coffees.

“I think I’ll do it. I’m not a hundred percent sure, but I’ll most probably do it.”

“You’ll sign? Really y/n?” Taehyung turned in his seat, gleeful.

“Uh yeah… I want to know what recording in a studio feels like. If it’s not as fulfilling, I will leave.”

“Okay yeah, that works. I’m glad you decided to give it a try,” Taehyung chirped at the end, hugging her tight sideways briefly before sitting up straight again, going back to the match on the screen.

“Thanks for convincing me. I know where you’re coming from but I’m just so-”

“Afraid, I know y/n, I was too.” Taehyung looked at her empathetically, because he truly had been there and he did know.

Y/n was beyond grateful for this beautiful man she had on her couch right now. He had helped her through many tough situations, time and time again. She knew she had been there for him too, but that was just what she wanted to do as his best friend but she was glad she could label him as that, her best friend. If she hadn’t spent those days with Taehyung as his lover, they wouldn’t be so close and if she hadn’t stopped the relationship when she did, they wouldn’t be so comfortable with each other as they were now.

All things happen for a reason, and y/n had decided she would wait for that reason to show while she listened to her heart. And that’s all it was, she convinced herself as she cupped Taehyung’s cheek and turned his face to her, staring at his eyes and mouth in turns. When his head dipped to press his lips against hers, she ignored all the alarms in her head and let herself enjoy, even if for just a little while. Seconds later, they parted and laughed. “We got too engrossed in old times, did we?” Taehyung asked, a slight quiver in his voice as he straightened up again. “I think we did, sorry,” y/n mumbled. “It’s always good to be put in your place, it’s alright. I was just reminded of what we were and what we are and how different they are. Don’t be sorry, I’m glad you did that.” Taehyung reassured her. “Thanks.” Y/n chuckled slightly, watching the football match for the first time since sitting down in front of the screen.

Picking up her phone, she decided to set a reminder for the next morning to call up YN Music. She would have to do this now that she had braved enough for it. What the future held, she didn’t know but she was willing to find out.

#kwritersnet #bt-yes-network #btssunshinenet #kreativenetwork #bts writing squad #taehyung #it was a strange struggle #i'm sorry for the shitty quality

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