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cuntboyprincess · 9 months

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GYNECOLOGIST STORY 🚺

This is a TRUE story, everything really happened!

About 2 years ago as I was still very freaking dysphoric, I had to visit the hospital for a check up on my hormones and to talk about a possible hysterectomy ~removing uterus and ovaries~. They have a special section for trans-people there. But this section is part of the ,,gynecology and obstetrics" department. So you basically had to sit in a waiting room together with 95% pregnant women. It was incredibly humiliating. Whenever I visited, they usually had a longer talk with me, took some blood and did a check up on my hormone levels. But this time was different. I mentioned how I had considered a hysterectomy and if it was possible to get an operation date.

I got a date and then they told me I had to wait outside in the waiting room because I should see the gynecologist and have a talk with them as well. They were basically next door. I was about 19-20 years old and up until this day I had never visited an actual gynecologist. I had avoided it and it was basically my worst nightmare. I actually had no idea what they even do there. But I took it kind of literal when they told me ,,have a talk with the gynecologist". I thought I should go see them and basically just talk about the hysterectomy. So not knowing what is going to happen now, I was called in to the examination room. I barely had closed the door behind me and a fat, grumpy woman with glasses on in her 50s stood face to face to me in front of me as she had opened a 2nd door. She was checking me out in a bit of an derogatory kind of way. She reminded me a little bit of Berta from 2 & a half men. And for some reason it terrified me. Before she said ,,Hello" she said ,,Take off your shoes, pants and panties. Then come in." Then she closed the door.

I was so in shock and totally mortified. I might was very naive but I simply didn't expect I'd actually be physically examined now. I felt like fainting. I wanted to leave so bad but I felt quite helpless in this situation, as if there was no way out. So against my will I took of my clothing. There was no way I could enter this room like this. I was standing there, not knowing what to do. I felt like crying so hard and as if I was literally waiting for my execution. After a while she opened the door and said annoyed ,,What's up with you?? Come in!" I felt my heart pounding and my face turning fire red as I entered. There were two other female assistants in that room. Berta ~I call her this now~ said ,,Lay down with your legs spread, your feet must be up there." I had never seen a gynecologist chair before, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I was so naive I had absolutely no idea what is done at the gynecologist. I had no choice, I lay down and I felt so embarrassed and degraded in this moment, I wanted to cry so bad. ,,Ever used tampons??", one of them asked. ,,Mhm" I answered, but it happened automatically, I felt like everything was happening in a fog, I was in a mental state where I just froze. Actually I didn't ever use tampons, I had avoided touching or interacting with my vagina in ANY way possible. So Berta came back with a dildo-shaped object in her hand, rubbing some lubrication on it. In my mind I said ,,This is not actually happening. There is NO way", my mouth sure stood open a bit because I was so shocked by this. Then she entered this thing into my vagina, just like that. I let out a little moan because it was totally unexpected and hurt a bit and I wasn't used to this sensation down there. My heart was racing so fast it felt as if it was about to explode. This was one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. I felt so degraded and traumatized because I had no idea what was going on. I just know there was a fat, old woman staring at my vagina while penetrating me with a dildo shaped object. Turned out it was some ultrasound thing and she was examining my ovaries and uterus, taking ultrasound pictures.

It was I guess the first time I ever had such a big, long object inside of me. I basically felt these sensations for the very first time in my life. She moved this thing around inside of me, looking at the computer. And I felt my body getting aroused. Like, I was in absolute mental agony, dying of embarrassment and feeling as dysphoric as I never had before...but at the same time I felt as if my cervix & uterus were tickling and my clitoris was stiffening. This made me feel even MORE horrible and degraded. After a while she pulled it out again, I could feel the... longness of this thing as she pulled it out. It also made a very quiet ,,blop" sound and I let out another short moan, perhaps because I got wet during the procedure.

I felt like throwing up, I'm not sure if my cheeks were fire red out of shame or if I was pale like a ghost. She said I could go back outside and get dressed. I was for certain traumatized after this. In the end I didn't get the operation because I didn't want to come back there ever so I didn't, I started visiting a different hospital where I do these checkups. Also I couldn't leave my house for a couple days, I was very depressed for several weeks and it probably changed me for ever.

It also marks how I started masturbating vaginally. After this experience I started to pleasure my insides more and more until it was excessive, like for the fiest time I started to shove things inside my vagina, because now I craved the tingling feeling around my cervix I had felt during this examination, I also craved embarrassment and exposure and dysphoria.

I think this experience was partly responsible for how fucked up I am today 🫢🥹 I'm so fucked up I got dripping wet by all these memories and now I'd LOVE to go see a gynecologist to get off to the embarrassment and exposure later on.

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heleizition · 4 years

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ive been thinking about how different life would have been for tim (and also the bats) if the drakes had both stayed alive..........

#thoughts ?#im so sleepy cant share what ive been thinking but #basically things Bad tim 19 and traumatized #but ye im curious what would have happened...

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supernaturalinguist · 5 years

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OC Meme Part 1

Personal

* 1) Age?

Soren is 28. They’re a Gemini, born on May 25.

* 2) Gender?

Nonbinary

* 3) Romantic/Sexual Orientation?

Bisexual

* 4) Height?

5”0

* 5) Race?

White, ethnically Jewish

* 6) What do they look like? (i.e, hair color, eye color, etc).

Dark brown hair cut short, that sticks up a bit messily. Honey-brown eyes. They have a mostly slender frame with a bit of “squish” to their stomach and thighs, which they are not fond of.

* 7) Any disabilities?

Minor hyper mobility especially in their knees. Occasionally they wear knee braces. They also have some mental illnesses (anxiety, depression, PTSD.)

* 8) Is there a meaning to their name?

They chose their first name themself! Paying homage to the Scandinavian roots on their father’s side of the family.

* 9) What makes them, them?

They’re a kind and gentle person with a constant hunger for knowledge and an eagerness to help others.

* 10) �� What do they want to be when they grow up/what do they want to do with their lives?

They want to be a linguist or translator, but they’re comfortable with the job they’re doing as a researcher and communications specialist at the Magnus Archives.

Family

* 11) Do they have parents? What are they like and how do they act with their child(ren)?

They have a mother and father, and are on better terms with their father than their mother. Soren was forced into a caretaker position of their mother at a young age, due to her mother’s disabilities and mental illnesses, and was the subject to a lot of parentification, gaslighting and mental/emotional abuse. Though their father has made strides to become a better person and has apologized for his past actions, Soren’s mother is still unstable and not mentally healthy, putting a strain on Soren’s relationship with her.

* 12) Do they have siblings? How do they interact with them? If not, do they wish they had siblings?

Soren is an only child and was raised with cats as their siblings.

* 13) Extended family? Do they see them often?

They have grandparents on both sides who love them dearly, and who Soren loves to spend time with.

* 14) Do they like where they live? (Is it a safe place?)

Soren currently enjoys living in London but definitely misses aspects of Japan.

* 15) Where do they live? Are they wealthy? Poor? Middle-Class?

Soren lives in a flat in metropolitan London and is pretty well off as a single person who works full time.

* 16) Do they have a lot of expectations/pressure on them from family to do great?

They used to when they lived with their parents, but now that they’ve limited their interactions and now lives a world away from them, most of the expectations come from inside themself.

* 17) Do they have pets?

They have a cat in their flat. (Persian, very cuddly. Named Shiratama?)

* 18) Who do they look up to the most/are the closest to in their family?

They respect their father a lot, and are very close to him. They are close to their mother as well, but in an enmeshed way that is not terribly healthy.

* 19) Is there anything special about their family?

Only the massive amounts of mental health and physical health problems they’ve had to deal with, regarding their parents.

* 20) Do they wish they lived in a different family/household?

Yes, frequently. Which is why they left as soon as they could.

Friends

* 21) Best Friend(s)?

They like hanging out with the Archives staff; Jon, Martin, Tim and Sasha in season 1, and then added to this, Basira, Daisy and Melanie. When they eventually meet Georgie, it’s awkward at first but they end up getting along very well. Going out for drinks and coffee with everyone is a somewhat regular occurrence. The person they currently trust the most would probably be Jon, though.

* 22) Who was their first friend?

Probably an elementary school pal who enjoyed the same music and books.

* 23) What is their friend group like?

Mostly coworkers.

* 24) Do they have a love/hate relationship with any of them?

Not particularly, they’re fond of everyone. However, Tim finds Soren to be an easy target to tease. This isn’t terrible but it can really fluster them.

* 25) Do they consider any of their friends to be like siblings?

Not quite so far.

* 26) Have they ever hurt a friend or lost one?

Yes, they have lost several in the past, mostly because of drifting apart. However a few separations were under traumatic circumstances, due to abuse.

* 27) Do they have a crush on any of their friends?

Yep. (It’s Jon.)

* 28) Do they share classes with good friends?

No but if there was a community center that everyone took classes at, they would definitely end up in classes with Martin in a bunch.

* 29) Whom do they go to the most when they need a shoulder to cry on?

Probably Jon, but Martin is also a close second and probably a better option.

* 30) What would this person do without their friends in their lives?

Be very sad and have no life outside of knitting scarves and jumpers in their apartment.

School

* 31) What grade are they in? If they aren’t in school, how come?

They are an adult and graduated from college, as well as received two masters degrees.

* 32) Do/Did they like their teachers? Was there a good one? Bad one?

Generally, they enjoyed their teachers but there were always a few bad apples in the bunch.

* 33) Do/Did they listen to their teachers or are/were they goofing off a lot?

Mostly listened to their teachers, but would often some off in class and doodle or write.

* 34) Are/Were they a good student grade wise?

For the most part they made good grades.

* 35) Do/Did they need extra help?

Yes, in Maths and Science they were not as skilled. (Dyscalculia from being autistic made it difficult to work with a lot of numbers.)

* 36) What is/was their school like?

They switched schools a lot in their youth, but they went to college in a small liberal arts college in the USA, before pursuing higher education in Japan.

* 37) Do/Did they have bullies in school?

Yes, from elementary to high school.

* 38) Have they ever gotten into a fight at school?

Never.

* 39) Have they ever done something stupid/embarrassing at school?

Yes, but not anything really of note. Usual mishaps.

* 40) How far do they plan to go with school? If they dropped out, do they want to go back?

They definitely are considering getting a doctorate.

Other

* 41) Are they dating anyone? Do they want to date? Are they married? Divorced?

Soren definitely wants to date but they’re worried about putting themselves in the dating pool. Eventually they begin dating a coworker at their place of work, and are very satisfied with the relationship.

* 42) What is their favorite hobby? Do they keep it a secret?

They don’t have a lot of secrets, and are proud of the multitude of hobbies they have! Recently they enjoy knitting, crochet, and embroidery.

* 43) If they could have one thing in life, what would it be?

A comfortable life with someone who loves and cares about them.

* 44) Do they work? If so, what is it? If not, are they looking for one or even want one?

Soren is employed at the Magnus Institute in London.

* 45) Do they use social media?

Yes; Facebook mostly. They deleted their Twitter because it was too fast and distracting. They have a Pinterest also. However, they don’t have a tumblr.

* 46) Have they ever been in the hospital?

Yes, mostly for minor surgeries.

* 47) Do they believe in the supernatural, that there is more than the eye can see?

Haha. Most definitely.

* 48) What do they do when they get angry, stressed, or upset?

Cry and self isolate.

* 49) Would they consider themselves as a good person, bad person, or morally grey?

They try to be the best person they can be but acknowledge they’ve made bad or questionable decisions in their past.

* 50) Does this OC have any part of you in them? (I.e, personality traits, similar background, etc)

They’re basically fictional self-insert version of me, but with more money. And a cool job and a date. Basically they’re living my dreams.

#soren #oc meme

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letsleep-away · 7 years

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Can you share your experience of what it's like being in a psych ward? I've always tried to avoid getting myself into one. Does it ever help at all or does it become another problem/burden with whatever that comes along with it? Also all the best to you, and hope you get well soon.

The number one advice I will give someone is to do their research. If you know you will end up in one, work things around so you at least end up in a good one because psych wards can be dramatically different from one another and it can be the difference between helpful or traumatic. I’ve been to two different ones so far and a psychiatric emergency center. I will put my experiences underneath because it will be kinda long

1. Emergency psychiatric center: not a psych ward, but if you go to the ER they might send you to one of these. This place is more of a 24-48 hour thing where they figure out where they will place you.(skip this process if you can). In my experience, it was pretty bad. You are basically in a big room with a lot of couches and beds with people who can be very severely mentally ill and sometimes aggressive(so you have to see tons of people being retrained and sedated …and at times unfairly) to people who are just there bc they got drunk and got in a fight/got destructive and had to choose between jail or eps. I was just 19 and most of the people there were 26ish. The nurses totally did not keep confidentially and told my parents everything. It was pretty bad.

2. Now actual psych wards:

- Rooms/bathrooms: this will be different depending on where you are. On my first psych ward you shared a room and there were communal showers and bathrooms. on my second one we each got our own beds with a personal bathroom, the doors for these bathrooms were held by a plastic thing so you couldn’t lock yourself in there but it was pretty nice.

-Food: food was good at both places I was at. you could choose your own menu in the second place and it ranged from salads to pizza and burgers and stuff like that. All three meals were at the same time every day but if you didn’t want to eat it at that time they just placed your tray somewhere and you could eat whenever you wanted to. There was always crackers or milk or snacks on both places.

-Belongings: Phones and every item of clothing with strings is taken away. sometimes if you come with a bag of clothes they even take that and its hard to get that clothes back, so its easier if fam/friends, bring you stuff afterwards. No strings or anything that you can use to harm yourself is allowed in the clothes and most places let you keep your shoes if you take out the laces. Most people just walk around in socks that they give you there though. They have phones there that you can use to call your friends, fam and people can call there too, usually patients answer and look for the person who is being called.

-Coffee/ Smoking: prohibited in both that I went

- Sedating patients with meds is SO common. Only in the first place did I ever see them physically restraint a patient…but I swear psych wards give anti anxiety meds like candy its annoying

-Groups/activities: pretty boring and standard. In both that I went to, going to groups was completely voluntary but it was a plus to being allowed to leave the ward so I always went. Because the severity of mental illness between patients, most groups were taught in such a way that it felt like I was in elementary school. After a while I got used to it though.

-Nurses: So in every day and shift you are assigned a nurse. They will give you your meds and if you have any concerns of questions you go to them. Some can be super nice and some are rude and annoying AF. I’ve had both.

-Psychiatrists: OH MY GOD. LIKE IS ONE of the fucking requirements that all psychiatrists be assholes???? The first one I went to she told me I was borderline and doing everything for attention and didnt want to let me out. The second one in the second psych ward told me he wasn’t getting me on meds because i would “overdose on them” and the third one I saw in the same fucking psych ward on my second attempt WOULDNT let me leave without having a confirmed psychiatrist appointment even though it was impossible to get it to soon and I was way past my 72 hour hold and was not suicidal anymore. the nurses helped me lie in order to be allowed to leave. He prescribed me a med that is an anti depressant But also an appetite stimulant when I told him I was bulimic. the thing with bulimia though is you BINGE a fuck ton…so why would an appetite stimulant work???and he kept on asking me daily if i was eating??like wrong fucking eating disorder dude. He was 80 and could barely walk and was missing half his teeth and his appointments with me were no more than 5 minutes. I thought I was getting locked in there forever.

So positives of psych ward: first couple of days tbh its super helpful. some groups do teach you knew things and being away from your daily stressors and having no choice is pretty relaxing. you can read or watch t.v all day knowing that you really have no choice but to just be in the moment. its a good place for thinking and being able to talk to others about what you are struggling about. I found friendships easily there. Although there are patients there who can make no sense (first psych ward this guy said i looked like his uncle and called me Tim the whole time I was there. He always always asked if I did cocaine for some reason. On the second psych ward, this patient always came into my room and cried in the corner asking me to hold her hand because she was scared and wanted confirmation that god loved her and forgiveness..it was sad at first but when the meds made me drowsy i just wanted her out of my room) there are also patients there that you immediately bond with. Like in both i had my friends who i sat with and had movie night at night time with and talked about dating and how crazy the doctors were and just how sucky depression was and things like that.

Negatives: Leaving is ALWAYS an issue. Wether you are on a hold or voluntary it doesn’t matter. If you leave against medical advice, your insurance can choose not to cover your stay(in the U.S) so unless you have thousands of dollars, you have to stay until you are told you can leave…which the psychiatrists have absolute decision making in that process. I always stay longer than necessary and have to fight my way to be let out. It feels like a prison towards the end and its pretty scary. This girl where I was at had a different psychiatrist..shes only 18 and she was wanting to already give her electric shock therapy and discontinued her meds because she didnt want to. She diagnosed her all fuckd up and wrong and she was giving people lithium and thyroid medicine when they didnt need it. She always was keeping the girl in for over a month…which is crazy. Mine would have dragged my stay but the nurses lied for me and helped me out and in the first ward my parents argued. When you switch over from a 51/50(72 hour hold) and they ask you if you want to do voluntary, always say no and they’ll put you on a 52/50…which means 14 day hold but all of those need hearings and most psych wards release you right before the hearing because they know they’ll loose. Some wards actually are pretty bad and terrifying so please please always research before you go to one.

This totally might be different if you are there voluntarily though. I was always there because of self harm or because i overdosed and came in with a 51/50 so yeh.

#depression #psych ward #mental health #anxiety #overdose

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edsmysterygirl · 7 years

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92 TRUTHS - tagging @justaboywithaonemanshow @givemeedplzfanks @edandanniina

THE LAST…

1) Drink: Forest fruit squash. 2) Phone call: My mom. 3) Text message: A friend from uni. She asked me to proof-read her thesis. 4) Song you listened to: I’m A Mess. I’m rewatching Glastonbury. 5) Time you cried: Friday, when I had my mental breakdown. Good news though, I get until the end of August to finish my thesis!

HAVE YOU EVER…

6) Dated someone twice: Nope. My current boyfriend is my first boyfriend ever. 7) Been cheated on: No. 8) Kissed someone and regretted it: No. 9) Lost someone special: I mean, a lot of family members and family friends. But is it bad if I say the worst ‘someone’ that I lost was my previous dog…? I never knew two of my grandparents and I lost one when I was 3 and the last one when I was 7. I feel like I never got to form a bond with them. And I wasn’t very close with the other people that I lost. 10) Been depressed: Never had the official diagnosis, but came close to it. People have been wanting to put me on antidepressants probably since I was 16 – but I have always refused. Let’s just say I have a lot of problems and have been in therapy on and off for 13 years now. It’s a long story. 11) Gotten drunk and thrown up: Nope, I don’t drink. 😊

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS…

12) Blue. 13) Yellow. 14) Red.

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…

15) Made new friends: In RL, not really. On Tumblr? Hell yes! 16) Fallen out of love: No. 17) Laughed until you cried: Yes. My boyfriend will sometimes make me laugh till a point where I basically can’t stop laughing and start crying. Fun times. 18) Found out someone was talking about you: Like, behind my back? Probably. 19) Met someone who changed you: Does discovering Ed count? 20) Found out who your true friends are: Yes. I’ve basically isolated myself socially in the past few years. The people that still check on my even though I don’t check on them (I know, I should…), those are my true friends. 21) Kissed someone on your Facebook list: Well, I’m friends with my boyfriend, so yes.

OTHER…

22) How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life?: I don’t see everyone regularly, but I met all of them at least once in RL before I added them. 23) Do you have any pets?: A dog and a cat. 😊 24) Do you want to change your name?: My last name, sometimes. No one ever gets it right. I guess marriage may fix that one day though, lol. 25) What did you do for your last birthday?: Make a Tumblr, LOL. 26) What time do you wake up?: Sometimes I wake up at 7:15 AM, sometimes I wake up at 4:00 PM… My sleep schedule has been all over the place lately. It’s messed up. If I had nothing to do I would probably sleep from 2 AM until 12 PM. 27) What were you doing at midnight last night?: Watching a Supernatural episode with my boyfriend (over Skype, because LDR). 28) Name something you cannot wait for: The day that this freaking thesis is finished!! 29) When was the last time you saw your mother?: Monday morning when I left for uni. I’ll see her again tomorrow when I go back home for the weekend. 30) What is one thing you wish you could change about your life?: My mental health? 31) What are you listening to right now?: Nancy Mulligan (still watching Glastonbury). 32) Have you ever talked to a person named Tom?: No actually? I know a Tim. And a billion Thomases. But no Tom. 33) Something that is getting on your nerves: My thesis. 34) Most visited website?: Facebook? Though maybe now Tumblr… 35) Elementary: Not that great. I got bullied a lot. Didn’t have many friends. Other than that alright, I guess? 36) High School: Okay. Bullying turned into ignoring me. Still didn’t have many friends. But these were the years that I discovered my love for languages and strangely enough I really enjoyed high school. 37) University: Still enrolled at the moment. Hoping to finish my Master’s degree in translation this year. 38) Hair color: Brunette. 39) Long or short hair?: Very long. 40) Do you have a crush on someone?: My boyfriend. And Ed, of course. 41) What do you like about yourself?: That’s a difficult question that I can’t really answer at the moment… 42) Piercings?: None, not even earrings. 43) Blood type?: No clue… Probably should find that out at some point. 44) Nickname?: MG on here. 😂 I don’t really have a nickname in RL. My mom calls me Josephine sometimes, which has nothing to do with my name. 45) Relationship status?: I have a boyfriend. 46) Zodiac sign?: Gemini. 47) Pronouns: She/her. 48) Favorite TV show: I used to watch SO MANY TV shows. Back when I was in high school I would watch 12 at the same time (like, as the episodes came out). For the past 2, 3 (?) years I have sort of stopped myself from watching TV shows. Because I get obsessed with things. Like with Ed right now lol. I will still occasionally watch an episode (like last night), but I’m really behind on everything. My enthusiasm for TV shows is probably what led to me studying English in the end. And Supernatural was the common interest that matched my boyfriend and I. 😊 49) Tattoos: None. 50) Right or left hand?: Right hand, though I can write with my left hand if I have to. But I don’t consider myself ambidextrous.

FIRST…

51) Surgery: Does a lumbar puncture (spinal tap) count? Probably not. Felt like one though. I have a medical phobia and about a year ago they suspected meningitis, so I had to have one. One of the most traumatic experiences I have had. They had to sedate me because I was so panicked. The whole hospital must’ve heard me scream and I pushed a doctor away (not on purpose, but if I’m yelling “STAY AWAY FROM ME” in your face and you approach me with a weird object that looked like something they were going to do the puncture with, well…) So they ended up sedating me and luckily I don’t remember a thing from the procedure itself. But they must have hit something, because my legs were numb and I couldn’t feel whether my bladder was full or not for like a week after. I’d just go to the toilet at times where I would usually go because I just didn’t feel anything. Plus I couldn’t stand up for longer than 10 minutes or my legs would collapse. Luckily all that went back to normal, though I still get this weird back pain from time to time that I associate with that. I don’t know how I will ever survive a proper surgery… 😭 I just can’t handle pain. 52) Piercing: Still don’t have one. 53) Sport: I don’t know which one came first, horse-riding or table tennis. Started both when I was 11. I stopped playing table tennis when I was 20, I stopped riding horses when I was 16. I don’t miss any of my hobbies that I’ve given up, except for horse-riding. 54) Vacation: We used to have a caravan/travel trailer when I was little. We’d go to the same camp site every year where we had our own spot with a shed and stuff. We’d go there in the weekends and during the summer. Later we bought a mobile home at a different camp site, but that camp site closed down when I was 20. Now going to see my boyfriend (and him coming over to see me) just counts as vacation for me. But that will change once I finish uni, I guess. 55) Pair of trainers: No clue? WHY IS 56 MISSING 57) Eating: Of the day? Ice lolly… 58) Drinking: Water. 59) I’m about to: Make dinner, mac & cheese. 60) Listening to: YNMIDNY. 61) Waiting for: My motivation to kick in. 62) Want: To sleep. All day, every day. 63) Get married: I’m not married yet. 64) Career: Don’t really have a career yet… I have a student job at a holiday resort with villas. And before that I worked as a cashier in a supermarket. I’d like to become a subtitler eventually.

YOUR TYPE…

65) Hugs or kisses?: I could live without kisses, but not without hugs. Not that I want to live without kisses... But if I had to choose, I mean. 66) Lips or eyes?: Eyes. 67) Shorter or taller?: If you would have asked me this a couple of years ago, I’d say taller. But my boyfriend is shorter than me. That’s what you get when you date an Englishman as a Dutchie. 😊 68) Older or younger?: Older. 69) Nice arms or nice stomach?: Arms. 70) Sensitive or loud?: Sensitive. 71) Hook up or relationship?: Relationship. I don’t think I could ever just hook-up with someone. Maybe Ed, lol. 72) Troublemaker or hesitant?: Out of those two, hesitant I guess?

HAVE YOU EVER…

74) Kissed a stranger?: No. 75) Drank hard liquor?: No. 76) Lost glasses, contact/lenses?: No. I’ve never lost my glasses, but I’ve sat on them before, lol. 77) Turned someone down?: Relationship-wise? No. In general? Probably. 78) Sex on first date?: No. 79) Broken someone’s heart?: No. 80) Had your heart broken?: No. 81) Been arrested?: No. 82) Cried when someone died?: Yes, obviously. 83) Fallen for a friend?: Yes.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN…

84) Yourself?: No…t really. 85) Miracles?: No. 86) Love at first sight?: No. 87) Santa Claus?: No. Funnily enough most Dutch kids don’t believe in Santa Claus. They believe in Sinterklaas instead. He’s a saint (Saint Nicholas) who gives presents to kids (in the weeks leading up to and) on the 5th of December. Some parents decide to have their kids believe in both, but I think most Dutch kids grow up with the idea that Santa Claus (or the Christmas Man, as we call him) is simply fake. Not sure why little me never questioned the existence of Sinterklaas, though… 88) Kiss on the first date?: Since I met my boyfriend online and the first time I met him in RL was after months of Skyping and already sort of being in a relationship, yes? 89) Angels?: No. I don’t believe in a higher power, though sometimes I wish I did.

EVEN MORE…

90) Current best friend’s name: Merel. 91) Eye color: Hazel? 92) Favorite movie: All of the LotR movies?

#personal

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