#both out of curiosity because i would like to make a picrew at some point

[catmask]

actually, i did want to ask you all - a commonly shared sentiment about character creators in games or dressup games online is there's very frequently a lack of black hairstyles.

so it made me curious - what are some black hairstyles you wish would be included more in character creators/dressup games? or ones you get really happy to see are included?

#you're welcome to just comment the name or rb with pictures! #scratchpost #both out of curiosity because i would like to make a picrew at some point #and also because i like hearing about what kind of hairstyles people like :D #txt

[kindan-no-kanojo]

I don't know if it's linked somewhere in your blog (if it's lmk) but I'm kinda curious about some habits that Scarlett has with her hands. I know it's a sensitive topic, and what makes me specially curious is how much do her hands participate in her body language. It's a very specific thing, yes, but it's about interactions. Let me explain why.

I will expose here what I assume from this, correct me if I'm wrong, although I'll see it mostly from Cassie's side so... help to complete the outlying perspective)?

Cassandra is a curious person, and somehow indiscrete, and today I was thinking "Why she hasn't asked about Scarlett's habit to wear gloves?" At first, I thought it was a thing of "the topic didn't come out, they haven't had chance to pay attention to minor things", but I realized that Cassandra isn't that way. In fact, it would be (and it is) one of the things that intrigues her about Scarlett. In the first meeting, she assumed it was all part of costume (Halloween's meeting) but interaction after interaction, Cassandra noticed this isn't a simple part of the hole aesthetic, but an important thing she decides to wear, in addition to the microgestures she makes everytime Cassandra touches her hands, whether if it's hand holding or kisses (and she likes a lot to kiss hands, it could be respectful or flirty). This makes her ask herself a big why. Cassandra sees her own hands as tools, which she has to keep available for use and something like gloves will always obstruct her job. She is an artist, she always get stained, she doesn't pay attention to that and gloves feel like some kind of binding that avoids her to move freely. Even if she shares with Scarlett (even if she doesn't know this), the adoration for her hands, she doesn't hide them, she shows them proudly. So, in her perspective this is very confusing.

And this is kinda the point I wanted to get here: as Cassandra finds it confusing, and I'll assume that Scarlett never ever takes off her gloves, my blonde can only assume that her friend is hiding something, that there is something really really wrong with her hands or she has some kind of complex. And even if she is indiscrete and the curiosity is somehow dragging her insane, (I assume that this will be more a conscious thing when they both are in silence for a moment and she casually looks to her hands lol), she doesn't say anything because she thinks that 'something' is telling her it will be triggering. And I'm looking for this "something". I was considering as you see, Scarlett's body language and habits with her own hands, so before assuming anything I preferred to ask it :3

So... what do you think that could be pulling Cassandra apart to ask about her gloves?

Ohh interesting :3 This got l o n g so I'll try to separate each part so you can read what you want (?) We have her hand language, why she hides her hands, her hand trauma (spoiler?), how her gloves blend in with her outfit (which is my assumption to your last question), a bonus thing about her design and a symbolic thing regarding her hands that I plan to write about soon.

I talked about the whole deal with Scarlett's hands very early on this blog (around 2021), but I think I privatized the post after a while. I used to make it much more obvious that she wears gloves because since I used picrews, I couldn't show that she wore them and that they were important lol. Once I got to make my own sprites and made sure that her hands were shown in the cropped version, I started being more subtle about it when writing, and nowadays I think it's public knowledge lmao. But it's true that the meaning behind her gloves has gone lost, so I'll do my best to explain all there is to it because she won't. Buckle up.

Her hand language

Her hands are meant to draw just enough attention when she speaks, acts or presents herself in general. She might do brief gestures like twirling her wrists when explaining, pointing with a finger to emphasize, disregarding something by waving a hand in the air, intertwining her fingers together to firmly display her standpoint on the topic, even placing a hand on her chest when she's confident about something she says or plans to do. As you can see, her hands' role is just to emphasize the focus on something else. Additionally, her hands are never drawn too far from her body. She doesn't make grandiose or exaggerated movements, she keeps herself shut in, despite being an extrovert who, much like Cassie, tends to be pretty out there, but in a different way.

Other motions include brushing her hair back when she's stressed, pinching the bridge of her nose when she's frustrated, poking her lips or tap on some surface when thoughtful, also placing her hands on her hips when she's challenging. She won't get touchy with people unless she knows it will distract them enough(?).

To keep her hands completely still or hidden behind her back might actually bring more attention to them instead, causing the complete opposite effect she desires. So she simply hides them under gloves, and makes sure she keeps sight of where her hands are and who would be able to reach them.

Why is she doing that?

Well, as anticipated before: trauma. Yes, she hides a lot of things, not only from Cassie but from everyone else. Scarlett pretty much hides everything she doesn't like about herself, be it by wearing make up, avoiding to take blood, making her waist smaller with corsets, wearing heels, etc. Some things she dislikes less than others, or likes better some other way, and so she easily changes them to not worry about her self-steem.

Her hands are a little different though. Externally, they don't show anything out of the ordinary (aside from their naturally black nails), but they do bring something with them that she absolute despises, and that is vulnerability.

Her hand trauma

She has already revealed that she worked a 'maid' in the past, and honestly that is a cute way to put it. Truthfully, Scarlett was enslaved by Rhiannon, and her failures meant physical punishments most of the time. Many of those punishments would be overlooked overtime, but when her hands were targeted, there was a psychological pain added to it, since she was, or once hoped to be, a musician.

Rhiannon picked up on Scarlett's lost dream and saw how she still wanted to pursue it, even under her ownership. Plus, Scarlett took it very personally when her hands were in danger, since a musician is nothing without them. Unfortunately, this triggered sheer amusement in Rhiannon, as she had found something to subdue Scarlett with by giving her both physical and mental pain at the same time when attacking her hands— breaking her hands meant breaking what was left of her dreams.

As a Demon, physical wounds heal completely after a while, but that only meant a blank canvas was to be used again and again soon, which happened. Eventually, Scarlett stopped resisting and gave in, even unironically dialogued with Rhiannon as to tell her that she couldn't do her job properly with wounded hands; she could hurt something else. That made Rhiannon reconsider, it really wasn't doing anything new anymore, by then Scarlett was already broken.

The Ghoul started wearing bandages until she got a pair gloves from Rhiannon, because the bandages would get loose and slow her down in her tasks. So, Scarlett started wearing gloves during her servant days, and while the abuse to her hands gradually ceased, the mental struggle when her hands are touched, or even looked at, remained unbearable ever since.

Her hands don't physically hurt, but her memories trigger a violent response to the touch to avoid potential pain. She keeps wearing gloves as to not draw attention to her hands, because why would anyone target something they can't see?

When someone reaches out to her hands, she reacts without thinking, though might come off as hostility or annoyance when it's from humans. She'd recoil or yelp when it's a Demon instead, and she can't remain composed at all when actual pain is inflicted upon her hands; she might break down into a crying and begging mess out of the strong PTSD that it causes her.

How her gloves blend in with her outfit

If I had to guess why Cassie would refrain from asking, aside from the understandable fear of screwing up (?), it could be because they visibly blend into her outfits, almost aesthetically so. She matches them with whatever she's wearing, lace gloves for the formal outfits, classy black ones for the casual or the school one, etc. It is known that she wears gloves all the time no matter the occasion, and they change with the outfit itself to not look out of place (which is also purposeful since they would be looked at if they were mismatching). So maybe the fashion choice worked to make them subtly styled instead of purposefully hidden, until the pattern raises questions when Cassie looks at her more attentively.

I can tell you that if she just asks about it, there shouldn't be any problem. However, don't expect the absolute truth from Scarlett because she won't give it 💀 If she's asked 'why the gloves?' she might answer that she protects her hands because she's a musician and all that. Which is kinda true, as it also links to her trauma and why she started hiding her hands in the first place. But you must dig really deep into her heart if you expect her to speak up in depth about how she feels, why she feels that way, what kinds of things her hands went through, what would bring her peace, etc.

Something to note: The issue comes only when someone else touches or hurts her hands. She can hurt her hands by accident and it would trigger nothing out of the normal. It's another thing about the trust issues of this control freak; she can't control what others might do if she lets them touch her hands so she would rather not even try.

Also she doesn't wear gloves when she's alone.

Bonus: design tidbits

I thought I'd share this too bc you maybe find it interesting as a fellow artist(?) jkds.

Design-wise, I wanted her to have something that would repeat no matter what she wears, like an easter egg (?). Initially it was going to be her corset, but drawing corsets was too much work 💀 so it changed to her gloves (I also had a trauma-related reason if I kept the corset choice lmao but it ultimately made everything more complicated anyway so I trashed the idea).

Aside from that, her poses. I mentioned earlier that she needs to keep her hands on sight to have the situation under control, which is why she keeps them to herself most of the time. It applies to her sprites: the previous one had one on her chest and the other one behind her. Could be seen as carefree, but it's also a way of hiding it behind her body, while the other one is in front of her eyes. In her current sprites, both hands are in front of her, intertwining fingers, as if protecting each other (there's a double meaning of course, that hand language is usually meant to show control and composure). VERY early sprites had one hand in her hair (like below her ear) and the other on her hips. So, yeah it's been shown there all along lol.

Unless I'm experimenting with poses, Scarlett most likely won't keep her hands too far from her body.

A light-hearted note

To finish the trauma dump on a more wholesome note: If Scarlett decides to take her gloves off around someone, that is a sign of trust. She either feels safe enough around that person or trusts that the situation won't mean danger or any reason to target her hands, so she's comfortable uncovering them. However, if, after doing so, her hands do get hurt, she's never doing that again.

On a more symbolic note, her hands could (symbolically) have a direct connection with her heart. Just like she doesn't let anyone in without permission, she won't let people touch her hands. Broken hands, broken heart? Don't touch it unless you plan to be extremely careful and don't intend to cause any harm, nor squish it, nor break it again. It hurts, and I will break you before you even try to break me.

Scarlett is not one to wear her heart under her sleeve, but one could argue that her heart is actually beneath her gloves.

#📭asklett #scarlett wakahisa #dryams03 #this got long OOP but thank you for your ask<3 #tl;dr cassie can ask and survive but she wont her truthful answers (?) #im realizing that if there's something ppl wonder about scar that hasnt been revealed; its probably some kind of trauma LMAO #hand trauma went hard in 2021. good days (? #kinda proud on the last line (?) i wanna write about that soon 😌 #👁‍🗨. about

[guigz1-coldwar]

'A ghost in town': New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out !

'A ghost in town'

"Question...is your turtleneck good-looking enough for me or not, Park?

Chapter Summary: Yirina & Park are both surprised & shocked to learn that Harry Stone that they killed in Cuba 2 months ago wasn't dead at all as another surprise awaits for them...

Link of the Picrew used !

To read it on AO3, click here!

Words : +3200

Taglist : @snowgoldwaylon , @clxudtea , @efingart

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Harry Stone...If there were a name that we didn't want to talk or even heard now was this particular one but this is what came out of Park's lips after she hanged up the phone, looking at me with the most confused face I could have ever seen and me, I was following the same mood inside of me, shocked & confused at hearing this. I didn't see happen but it was clear, Park, me & SAS lived what happened that day in Cuba, I'm the one pulling the trigger on Stone's gun who killed him, and....how he can be alive? I shot him!

I think I never saw Park standing up from her seat in a fast move, her chair hitting the wall behind it almost brutally while she took back her jacket and quickly walked out of the room with me, trying to copy her moves. It was better for me that I don't speak at all during the whole walk as looking at her, seeing her fists clench all along the way, almost ready to punch anyone that was going to step in front of her, and frankly, I prefer to not be that person.

She was walking this fast that around the hallways of the building to join Zasha's team office that it was sort of exhausting, her not stopping at all or taking a simple breath to calm herself down with me and it's with that attitude that when we arrived in front of the door leading to our destination, she opened the door widely, nearly at the point that she could have removed the door from its frame.

"You better hope that's a joke, Sarah!" She started, her hand pointing towards Sarah who was standing near Peter's desk, him sitting on his chair as Zasha & Portnova were here too, waiting for us, and leaned against the front Sarah's own desk. "I don't like to joke on that," She added.

"Hey, I'm not saying anything funny, miss Park," Sarah defended herself, putting her hands above her heart.

"You don't know how much I'm not that pleased to hear that, if it's a joke, it's not fucking funny," Park warned her, sounding very serious, a voice that could kill everyone around her...including me.

"Calm down, Park," I suggested, stepping between the two in the case as Park wasn't removing her angered face against Sarah, having to put my hands on her chest to make her fall back. "Anger isn't helping, calm down, okay?" I said, looking at her but that face wasn't getting away.

"Yirina, it ain't a joke at all," Zasha's voice intervened, making me turn my head around to see them crossing their arms as Portnova had her both hands together. "She showed us the proofs," They added, gesturing with their head towards Sarah.

"Is it right?" I asked nonetheless to Sarah, keeping Park under control, calmer than her.

"Miss Grigoriev, what we got isn't making us laugh," Peter spoke up, tapping his finger on his desk at a slower pace.

"I saw it happened: I shot Stone in the shoulder through mine," I protested, seeing him looking down at his hands.

"That wasn't Stone at Cuba, miss Grigoriev," Sarah called me out as she handed to me a medical report of Stone when his body was taken from the Cuban compound. "Here's one of the proofs we got," I took her file in my hands, checking up, and by looking at it, everything was looking clean.

"What's wrong with that?" I demanded, confused as I gave gently the report to Park who looked it up.

"You didn't see what was wrong with it?" Sarah raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms at me as the others were staying silent to me & Park as if they wanted us to guess the answer on our own.

"The blood type..." Park muttered in a low voice as she lowered the report in her hands along with her body slides. "We didn't even check the bloody blood type," She continued, sniffing away in anger before she throws hardly the report on the ground, the others not moving an inch from their positions.

"The blood type?" I narrowed my eyes, avoiding the report at my feet, to look at Sarah.

"Stone's blood type is O+, this report said that it's A-," Portnova was the one who gave me the answer. "The person that you killed in Cuba wasn't Stone but a double," She continued, going off the desk but staying near Zasha.

"Even if we did multiple checks, that detail managed to be hidden," Zasha told us, the palms of their hands moving to grab the side of the desk they were leaned on. "We send a copy of this to the director but also the SAS,"

"How did you discover it?" Park demanded, seemingly calm in her voice but I prefer to stay near her in case, seeing her fists still clenched.

"I was crossing around some report until I was given something," She replied, Portnova putting her hands on Sarah's desk to grab something and gave it to me, it was an envelope...'For the Majesty's Secret Services from Perseus'...that was marked on it with a marker pen, and then, I took my hand inside the envelope and take out a picture. "That's what makes me curious," My eyes went wide at seeing that picture in black & white.

On it, we could see Lukas Ritter but he wasn't alone at all. Near him, a man was wearing some glasses with a sort of leather jacket, hands up pointing towards Lukas and..the third man was none other than Stone himself, wearing the very same military outfit he was always having in those pictures of him each time my eyes were on them...but also in the memories he was involved in. The picture was having a date on it, it was taken one day ago...in London.

I kept the picture in my hands as I showed it to Park who wanted to take it inside her hands but she was looking ready to tear it apart, judging by the face she was making. I even had to get my right hand on her left shoulder to keep her calm at the moment before she took a deep breath, looking away from me and the others to sit on a chair that was near Peter's office.

"The MI6 wasn't the only one that was sent that picture," Sarah explained as I gave her back the picture. "We've got a phone call from the MI5, saying that they received it too," She added, moving to get back to her desk, Zasha & Portnova moving aside to be next to Zasha's office door.

"When Sarah received that, we decided to check up everything we got on Stone and we found a lot of things with him," Peter elaborated, getting himself well in his seat. "We concluded that Stone is still alive,"

"Yes, that's mean he's becoming again a priority," Zasha breathed, scratching the back of their head, looking at my feet. "That shit...dammit," They cursed.

"Did you know anything about a double, Portnova?" I asked Portnova, knowing that she was the third one in the room that could tell us more about him since she worked with him in her time in Perseus.

"No, that's the first time I heard of it," She responded in a serious voice, shaking her head as her hands were on her waist. "That wasn't something we would have heard of, Stone always been a man making his things away," She commented.

"That's always been like him," Park's muffled voice was heard through the palm of her hands as she was holding her face. "Faking his death, I know that and he did the trick again," She stated.

"How's that?" Peter questioned her with curiosity.

"One year ago, we got signs of a criminal mastermind in Leningrad and I was sent there to investigate," Park started, removing her hands away from her face as she slowly turned her head around to look back at everyone. "Stone was at that time, hidden under the nickname 'Janus' and he knows that I was going to be the one that the MI6 will send," She sighed before going up from her, rather better than a few minutes ago. "He made his revelation to me...and since, he became one of the MI6 top targets until we ended him...until now,"

"How a man like him can always escape from us?" Peter demanded, sounding & looking confused.

"Because he's thinking higher than us, that's the thing," I answered like that to him, crossing my arms and walking to lean myself on one of the walls of the big office. "I know him too and he wasn't very friendly, thinking for his own," I complained, biting with my teeth the left part of my bottom lip, a bit distraught by that news as I lean my back against the wall near the door leading to the hallway outside. "Apart from that, any other bad news?" I asked.

"We finally found who was this I.B from the transmissions," Zasha exclaimed, getting mine & Park's attention to them who gestured towards Sarah with their head.

"Name's Ingo Beck, a former operative of the Diensteinheit IX turned Perseus agent years ago in 1981," Sarah replied, adding to her words, tapping on another file looking like records as Park moved to get to it. "Said to be an explosives expert with a big sense of humor," She scoffed, her tone not looking funny for Park who looked at her with a deadly glare. "And...Uhm...he seems to be involved personally with Stone,"

"So, our I.B was an East-German operative...like Ritter," Park whispered, her eyes on the file.

"We discovered it inside another envelope that we received," Peter spoke up, grabbing another envelope on his desk and he showed it to us...'From a friend, take care of it'...this time marked with a red pen. "We make some research about it but nothing about who has sent this one...and the other one,"

"Nothing?" I said.

"Nothing at all, Yirina," Zasha responded at me, shrugging. "I tried to..." They tried to say before they were cut by the sound that was coming inside their office. "Wait, I think that someone's calling me," They thought before they moved to walk away, opening the door of their office and closing it behind them.

"Perseus sent to the MI6 and the MI5, picture of Stone to taunt us that he isn't dead and in London...and someone else sends to us, a file explaining who is this mysterious I.B," I basically resumed the entire situation now, actually trying to figure out anything wrong from it. "Dammit, how is this fucking possible? What Perseus is planning?"

"A lot of inexplicable things," Peter suggested, raising his shoulders.

"Petrov trying to kill me, sending Ritter & Beck in London and now with Stone, something's big is going to happen," Portnova recalled us, making a brief resume of the situation...now much worse than we thought. "In two words, we're in deep troubles,"

"Soon, the whole MI6 & MI5 will be on high alert so..." Peter talked until he was cut off by Zasha's door getting opened, having finished their call apparently.

"Yirina, Park, you're needed," They said and the first thing we did was to look at them with narrowed eyes, surprised. "A CIA agent is awaiting in your office right now," They added and by that, I was immediately having my blood froze in place...fearing the worst.

"Did he tell his name?" Park asked, eyes on me but her voice directed to them.

"Said he goes by 'Alex', that's all," They responded before Park passed her hands through her hair as I took a relieving breath...not so relieving after hearing that a CIA agent was in our office.

"Shit, we're going, we're talking about that later," Park sighed before she decided to walk away from the office, following her and leaving the others.

If the day wasn't going to be shitty enough, learning that Stone was still alive after all and that mission in Cuba, discovering the true identity of 'I.B', there was now a CIA agent that was inside on our own office just above us and even if it wasn't Hudson or even Adler, questions were flowing in me & Park, wondering what's the CIA is doing in London and why they wanted to see us in particular...maybe me...

Park was seeming calmer in appearance but deep inside of me, I knew that she was very tense that her anger could maybe appear again at any moment, it was like the first time I saw her angry like that...it was the first time I really saw her angry after all and I wasn't confused about it, knowing the history between her & Stone, that anger was understandable for me but now, is that meeting with this CIA agent was going to be good or wrong?

When we approached our office, the door was already widely opened, two men who were wearing the same type of clothes as Adler and guarding our own office, making us feel that we weren't at Century House in here. When the agents saw us arrived, they let us pass and we could see a man that was a bit taller than us, waiting near Park's desk, his face with some scars on his left part.

"You must be the famous Helen Park," The man started, his eyes focusing towards Park and his voice not looking very...happy.

"Yes, and you?" She asked, a bit curious.

"I'm Aleksander Smirnoff...but for you both, call me 'Alex'," He replied as I moved to offer my hand for a shake, staying polite above all but instead, he refused to hand over his hand to me. "I'm sorry but not shaking with woman, I don't like that," He told us.

"And why that?" I narrowed my eyes to him, getting my hand back along with my slides. *

"Because I have my reasons, that's all," He responded in a harsh tone, looking at Park with a deadly glare as she was moving at the other side of her desk, causing him to move away from it and getting next to me. "You know why I'm here, right?" He demanded to both of us.

"No, it wasn't said to us," I answered, crossing my arms as I lean against my desk, Park sitting in her chair.

"Well, to start, we got wind that one of the MI6 top targets faked his death," He revealed in a normal voice, getting his hands around his waist.

"Uhm...how did you know that?" Park questioned him, surprised that the CIA was already aware of the situation along with me.

"It was pretty simple: the CIA has ears & eyes everywhere in London," He said, turning around to look at me with a not trustful look.

"You, in the CIA, can't avoid spying on your own allies...typical," I mumbled, finding this type of move very something that the CIA is doing everywhere....fucking typical. "You'll never change, that's for sure," I added.

"Maybe what we're doing is to make sure that Perseus isn't making his moves everywhere, we're working with our allies, not spying on them, that's different," He corrected me but I was unconvinced by them, used to the CIA's lies against me. "Oh...you must be Yirina Grigoriev...the one that we call...

"Don't say that name," Park called him out, pointing her left index finger at him.

"Always been like that, miss Park," He sighed, looking at her with desperation. "Was it with that attitude that you caused the death of some of my friends in the CIA months ago?" He asked in a normal voice, pointing at her.

"What are you telling right now, Alex?" She demanded, her hands on the armrests of her chair, looking ready to get up very fast.

"Are you the woman who likes to..." He stopped himself to look at me with a smile. "Well...to play & manipulate like a little witch?" He finished his question and that wasn't something I liked and her too, going up from her seat to reach him.

"Park, don't," I stepped myself in front of her, putting my hand against her chest again to stop her in her walk, her fist already clenched for a punch. "He's trying to make you angry, don't cross that line, please," I pleaded, saying it silently at her, looking at her.

"Yiri, if you just..."

"Don't, please," I cut her gently in her words, pleading again, my hand feeling like struggling to stop her to move forwards in her path.

"You can hold her as much as you want, ain't going to stop her," Alex added in a normal voice again.

"If you can just stop what you're doing, it will help," I advised him, feeling inside of me that I could be like Park and doing it by myself. "Why are you here, to be frank with us?" I asked him finally, not looking at him.

"I'm here because I wanted to remind you of things," He started, hearing him walk away as Park was not removing her eyes from him, allowing him to know where he was in the room. "The CIA will be working on Stone, pleasing you or not," He said.

"I thought that you will stay focus on Perseus at Verdansk, right?" I muttered, finally turning my head around and keeping my left hand on Park.

"Let's just say that Stone's sudden reappearance did make us willing to make what you weren't able to do," He sounded a bit joking in his voice, feeling Park's chest struggling to get away from me. "And besides, you both are still under our watch as we're now chasing a ghost in town,"

"What do you mean?" I mumbled, narrowing my eyes at him as he was going to walk away from the office, standing in front of the door.

"As I said, the CIA has ears & eyes everywhere in London," He told us, making us remember his words earlier before he decided to get out of our office, his presumed friends guarding the door following him until they disappear from our sight.

"You should have let me hit him," Park suggested in a serious voice, her right hand moving gently above my left one.

"It wasn't going to help you and you're not the only one who resisted about it," I then move my hand away from her chest before looking down at our feet, a bit confused. "I don't want to see you angry, that's it," I whispered.

"I'm sorry, it's just..."

"Don't tell me, it was just to test your nerves, it's okay," I exclaimed, cutting her again gently. "With what we heard & learned, I can understand your anger," I continued, taking a deep breath while staying at the same spot. "Listen, this situation isn't really good but we're going to make sure that things came back right...including putting Stone back where he belongs," I proclaimed, passing my right hand through my redhead's hair.

"I know, we should stay calm...I should stay calm, maybe some coffee will help," She proposed and I nodded, looking back at her with a little smile on my face. "Do you want one?" She demanded at me.

"As it's nearly noon, we can maybe go out with Zasha & Portnova for lunch," I suggested to her and she nodded too, looking at her watch and seeing that it was almost noon, as I said to her. "If we can just go out and try to depressure a bit, it can be better, right?" She nodded again, a smile forming on her lips as I was wondering where we could go...

"Why don't we go to a Burger Town?"

#cod bocw #cod cold war #cod black ops cold war #cod cw #call of duty cold war #cod #call of duty #cod bell #black ops cold war #yirina grigoriev #fem!bell #helen park

[thefoxwhowanders]

Here's some character descriptions for my main characters from my story if anyone is interested! I used picrews to show you guys how they look! Also, I don't have a lot of time to draw them right now 🙃

Ingra is a strong-willed character who rarely hides her feelings, and even if she tries, it’s always written on her face. She can be blunt at times and says things without giving much thought to it. She has a tendency to say some of her thoughts out loud, because it helps her think. She’s always longing for knowledge and would ditch any party just to read a book. She tends to ask a lot of questions without thinking, because her curiosity sometimes takes over. If she is given the chance, she can talk for hours about anything and everything. She tends to keep to herself most of the time, because she’s afraid others will find her annoying, so she stays away. She would cry with you if you are sad and hug you while you cry. She may talk a lot, but she can be a good listener if you need her to be. She loves to dance more than anything, because she used to dance with her mother before the kidnapping. She would dance all day if she could. She also loves to sing, but she thinks she’s not that good at it even though she is.

Favorite color(s): Burgundy and cerulean blue

Favorite season: Spring 

Likes: Animals, dresses, jewelry, her parents, snow, soft music, flowy dresses, folktales, fairy tales, stories in general, books, knowledge and owls

Dislikes: loud music, beetles, spiders, pastel dresses on her, the king, slavery, and nosey people. 

Suirea is a person who tends to keep to himself when he can, and he avoids going to parties, because they make him feel uncomfortable even though he has to go to them. He would always sneak out of the palace during a party in disguise to get some time to himself. He has a tendency to put others before himself and his own needs. He doesn’t care about himself as much as he does for others which causes him to get hurt easily. He’s the kind of person who falls in love too easily or gets attached too easily. He’s a great listener, because he puts all his attention on you. He isn’t afraid to be open about his own feelings, because it helps him to talk about it. Other times, he just pushes the feelings away and tries to forget about them. He can be selfish sometimes when it comes to the people he gets attached to, but he tries his best to hide it out of fear. Suirea loves to paint and read and write poetry, because it calms him and makes him smile. He also enjoys sparring and archery.

Favorite color(s): Gold and green

Favorite season: Winter

Likes: poetry, memorizing quotes, big dogs, rain, birds, climbing, crafting, making things with his hands, roses, his sisters and his mother

Lucero is a character who tends to hide his feelings behind a smile. He's a person who does his best to make your day better when you're sad. He's always smiling, even when he's sad (sometimes) which can be a problem. He tends to make people laugh without even trying to be funny. He laughs pretty easily, because he finds mostly everything funny. When he has to be serious, he will be serious. He can be a little reckless sometimes, and oblivious. He has a tendency to daydream a lot, and completely forget any task at hand. Lucero can easily tell if someone is in a bad mood without even having to talk to them. He likes to go to all the festivals and parties, because he enjoys them. He can be a little blunt, and he isn’t afraid to say what’s on his mind. When it comes to showing affection to others, he does it frequently. He would hug you all the time if he can, but he knows that some people can feel uncomfortable if he does that, so he restrains himself. He would tell you he loves you a million times if he can, and throw compliments at you 24/7. He’s not afraid to tell you exactly how he feels about you. He sometimes thinks he has an annoying/overbearing personality, so he tries to say things that he thinks people may not find annoying. Lucero loves to dance, which is an interest he shares with his closest friend Ingra because they both love to dance. He loves to bake and cook because it was one of the things he loved doing with his mother whenever his father wasn’t home. Astronomy is a subject he adores, he could talk about space for hours and hours. He also loves making origami for fun.

Favorite color(s): Red, and black

Favorite season: Summer

Likes: Dancing, baking, his mother, cooking, making origami, cats, astronomy, Ingra (not romantically), daydreaming, sewing, jokes, laughing, talking, partying, and festivals.

Dislikes: his father, being annoying, being alone, rain, loud noise, phonies, cruel people, and bullies

Asante is a person who puts her duties before her interests. She is the kind of person who would put all her focus on something and forget to take care of herself. She is usually a composed person, but she will knock you down if you attempt to hurt her friends, her people or stand in her way. She is wise for her age, and there are times where people think she is older than she actually is. She loves her culture and her people more than anything. She would do anything for them even sacrifice her own life for them. She isn’t afraid of people hating her for what she believes in. She is understanding and does her best to listen even when you disagree with her. She loves to joke around a lot, and she can be sarcastic, but she does her best to not ever cross the line. She loves to be around people and party if she feels like it. She has a tendency to overthink things and worry a lot to the point of keeping herself up all night. She’s the kind of person who would write down all your favorite things on a piece of paper and try to memorize them later. She loves to cook and clean when she’s feeling tense or angry because it calms her. She also loves history and different cultures.

Favorite color(s): dark blue, and red

Favorite season: Winter

Likes: Cooking, jokes, butterflies, culture, people, history, food, long naps, sitting around the fire, her mother, and sewing (she likes to sew her own clothes)

Dislikes: Sweets, liars, waking up early, fake people, and being alone (she doesn’t dislike a lot of things

Since Alexandria was a child, she has always been self-conscious about her body and herself. People would always make fun of her for being chubby and overweight to the point where she began to hate herself. As she got older, she began to ignore all the comments she received from others including her parents. She stopped caring about what other people thought of her, but sometimes it still affected her when someone called her something she was not. She tried her best to not care about her appearance, but whenever she looked in the mirror, all the negative words said to her began to surface and come out. Alexandria likes to doodle on her hands when she’s bored and play scenes from her favorite stories with her older sister. She isn’t afraid to try new things whether it’s a new dish or a game she’s never played before. She can be a bit stubborn, but if she knows she’s wrong then she will try to understand. She doesn’t like when people worry about her and she likes to fight her battles by herself rather than asking anyone else for help. She likes to do everything by herself without ever wanting to ask anyone for help, because she didn’t want people to think she’s weak. She tries to be strong and brave even when she feels weak. 

Favorite color(s); Pink and Lavender

Favorite Season: Fall

Likes: Doodling, acting, stories, games, puzzles, soft music, her sister, gardening, waking up early, sweets, playing in the leaves, spicy food and rain.

Dislikes: her parents, her older brother, being forgotten, being hated, nuts, and parties

He’s a silent man, who chooses to speak only when he needs to most of the time. He barely speaks because he prefers to keep to himself, because he believes no one would care about what he says anyways. As a kid, he was always smiling all the time so he has smile lines on his face. He also loved to play the piano when he was younger but he hasn't touched the piano ever since. He's become a shadow of the person he once was after his family was murdered. Rogue takes it upon himself to take revenge and find the people who killed his family. He stops using his given name on that day and takes the name Rogue, because he believes he doesn’t deserve the name his father gave to him after the things he did. He grew up with a loving family, and a dream of one day becoming a musician, but it all changed after that day. Even though he doesn’t speak a lot, he does listen and pay attention. He also cares in his own way like giving someone a larger portion of food while he gets the smaller portion or giving someone his cloak when they are cold. He would be the kind of person to buy you a nice and thoughtful gift, because of how much he pays attention. He keeps a small flute he carved himself in his pocket at all times, because he likes playing it. 

Favorite color(s): Red

Favorite season: Winter

Likes: playing the piano, archery, counting the stars in the sky, playing the flute, music, nature, and the sound of birds chirping in the morning, 

Dislikes: the king, talking, the cold, and loud noises (he doesn’t really dislike a lot of things)

(He has elf ears, but I can only choose one bc of the 10 image limit 😭)

Ren is a shy character who likes to keep to himself most of the time, but he does speak a lot once you get to know him. He gets embarrassed pretty easily, and he can be clumsy sometimes which is funny, because you would never expect it from someone like him. He doesn’t like when people give him compliments, because he doesn’t know what to say in return. He always has a serious face, and it’s rare to see him smile. He tends to blush a lot whenever he’s complimented, because he isn’t used to it. He has a hard time showing affection and returning it, because he never received a lot of affection in general. When someone asks him about something he loves, he gets really passionate about it and excited; he can talk about it for hours if you asked him too. Whenever someone jokes around with him, it takes him a while to realize it’s a joke so he always laughs late. It’s also hard for him to detect sarcasm, so he always takes it seriously whenever someone is being sarcastic towards him. He’s the kind of person who would find dad jokes funny and try to make some himself. He’s pretty intelligent, but he can be a little clueless sometimes. He also has trust issues, because whenever he becomes attached to someone, they always end up leaving him once they know his secret. Ren isn’t ashamed of being an elf, so he likes to walk around without hiding his ears even though he gets a lot of stares and hate from others. Ren doesn’t like hugging or touching people, but he doesn’t mind when someone does it back to him as much. He loves archery which is why he keeps a bow and arrow on him at all times. He loves to play the lyre his father gave him whenever he’s outside in nature, because it calms him. 

Favorite color(s): silver

Favorite season: Spring

Likes: playing the lyre, nature, solitude, dad jokes, fishing, being outside, archery, hiking, reading, math (yes, he loves math), gardening, sweets, quiet and swimming 

Dislikes: The cold, parties, crowds, spicy food, compliments, and loud noises

I still have two more characters I'll add later! Yeah, here are my characters! Tell me what you think of them? Which character or characters are your favorite so far? If you have any questions, just ask and I'll do my best to answer!

Tagging some mutuals! @insane---chaos @oscar-fairchild @nolu @mitsuhamiyamizi @idontgetit-whydoihavetosaymyname @ineedadrinkorsleep @older-brother-kit @idontgetit-whydoihavetosaymyname @brotherhalal-ariahs @fieryfantasybooklover @ghostlivvy @zzoyalantsov @purplebass @vxnya-hxrgreeves @morgnstern @anxiousbookenthusiast @theprinceoftheaire @themostawesomehuman

[survivus]

@towercursed​ said:  👶🏻 punz and tadashi bc punz wants lots of babies

send me 👶🏻and i’ll hc about our muses’ child   /   currently  accepting   !

name:   Clara Hamada

birthdate:  August 17th

personality headcanon:   this child is a nightmare at first !!   she has the curiosity of both her parents,   and so the minute she learns to crawl they cannot take their eyes off her.   tadashi ends up making her an ankle bracelet with a gps tracker in that beeps when he presses a button so they know where she is at all times skdhbfsdf.   as she gets older she doesn’t change that much,   but she does become better at letting her parents know where she’s going and what she’s doing     (     but not until after tadashi called the police on her     ).

what was their first word and how old were they when they said it:   clara’s first word is up for debate.   she started speaking a little later than the other kids so both tadashi and rapunzel were on high alert for any potential words;   tadashi swears she said  ‘ ball ‘  when he was giving her a bath on a tuesday night,   but rapunzel claims she said  ‘ mama ‘  the sunday before.   the truth is,   her first word was   ‘ cass ‘   ,   aunt cass just doesn’t want to burst their bubbles.

did they get in trouble in school:     constantly,   though not for actually being bad.   she was just really curious,   and really smart;   so smart she would get bored in class and start messing around/experimenting.   she also went through an   ‘ experimental art ‘   phase which often involved spilling lots of paint everywhere,   often over her friends.   they soon learned not to send her to school in WHITE,   plus a change of clothes in her backpack.  

which parent were they more attached to:     clara was pretty attached to both of her parents,   despite her independent nature.   neither rapunzel nor tadashi would admit it,   but the person she was MOST attached to was aunt cass,   whom hiro dubbed  ‘ graunt cass ‘      (   pronounced  ‘ grant ‘   -   as in,   grandma/aunt cass    )  and it stuck.   the minute rapunzel goes to drop her at cass’ to be babysat she would squirm out of her mother’s hold,   yell  ‘ graunt cass ! ‘   and toddle off into the kitchen without so much as a goodye wave.

what was their favorite toy:      rapunzel bought her a paint set when she was three and she was totally obsessed.   tadashi tried to convince her that the   ‘ my first science kit ‘   was better,   but very quickly admitted defeat and started bulk buying non-toxic paints.   also more cleaning products.

did they cry a lot as a baby:     yes  !!   this baby wanted attention,   like,   ALWAYS.   as she got older she became much quieter   (   like between 1.5 / 4 yrs   )     and began to enjoy her independence more,   but at first she would scream whenever one of her parents left the room.

movie they watched over and over:     finding nemo;   she didn’t care that it was old by the time she was born she was just  O B S E S S E D  with the lil fishies  !!!

what was their favorite subject in school:     art   !     she enjoys physics as a whole but she often found the classes too easy because they are so linear.   with art she could memorise as much info as she wanted,   but it was work that made her a good artist   -   she enjoyed that.

were they social growing up or quiet:     clara loved socialising,   she was happy to chill out and play with her friends all day,   but at a certain point she would become tired and want to spend some time either with her parents or on her own reading or something,   to recharge.   at that point she would crawl into the lap of whichever parent was closer and tug on their shirt until they listened to her whisper   ‘ home now ? ‘

which parent do they take after:     both  !   mostly rapunzel,   but she has tadashi’s sense of humour.

what do they grow up to be:      after a lot of bouncing around,   just making things work and doing odd jobs,   she becomes an architectural designer.   she gets to use both art and science,   and enjoys the challenge of coming up with illogical and mind bending builds that are seemingly impossible.

three random headcanons:    

i.   she thinks uncle hiro’s robots are stupid,   until tadashi confiscates her phone and she needs one to get it back.      

ii.   despite her parentage,   her hair has a ginger shine to it,   just like tadashi’s mother.   the first time he noticed this,   he cried.    

iii.   she loves eating sweet foods,   but baking is possibly the only thing she isn’t naturally good at.   she gets incredibly frustrated every time aunt cass tries to teach her,   and it often ends with her throwing her oven gloves on the counter and storming off.   she only comes back when aunt cass brings the batter spoon for her to lick and sweet talks her into trying again.

likes & dislikes:    

likes.     sweets,   painting,   charcoal,   finding nemo,   her finding nemo plushie,   all her other plushies,   riding on her dad’s moped.

dislikes.      baking,   teachers,   being told what to do,   being grounded,   black and white movies,   cringey sitcoms.

do they get along with their parents:     yes   !   she  definitely had rebellious phases,   but for the most part she’s really close to tadashi and rapunzel and will often call them to catch up or just hang out with them in the city for no reason other than she misses them.

faceclaim:      picrew here  !

#towercursed #⟨ REL. / TADASHI HAMADA. ⟩ : SHE IS SUNLIGHT AND I’M CAUGHT UP IN HER EYES / TOWERCURSED. #clara hamada. #CLARA MEANS BRIGHT IN GERMAN !! #long post /

[anythingyoucanimagine]

Footsteps. Who's? His. No, no, not his. You're safe, remember? Things are safe. But why would his footsteps be so close then…?

Aya's thoughts echo for a moment, before her mind finally allows her to reenter the world of consciousness… Immediately aware of the short, bespectacled boy currently holding her phone.

"... Aki? What… What're you doing?" Aya asks quietly, before clearing her throat and actually sitting up.

Aki looks over with a jolt, his ears tilting back slightly when he realizes he woke Aya up. "O-oh- sorry, I didn't mean to wake you…" He says, smiling apologetically.

"It's fine, Aki…" Aya says, then does a double take. "Why're you holding my phone…?"

Aki pales a bit, before a blush rushes to his cheeks. "U-um, well… I wanted to call and get you a day off… I-it's your birthday, after all… Um- happy birthday, by the way!" He says, trying to change the subject with a sweet smile.

"Shit, that's today? I'd forgotten… Thanks, Aki, but I still need to work. I can't just randomly take a day off…" She says, shaking her head as she gets out of bed.

She's wearing what she usually does while she sleeps, a tank top with her hair loose on her shoulders, but she immediately goes to get the button up and pants she wears for work.

"I- okay…" Aki sighs, putting her phone down.

"Hey, I love you. Thanks for trying to look out for me, but I'll be back after work…" Aya says, smiling at Aki.

Aki smiles back, his usual cheerful demeanor returning without a hint of his previous expression. "I love you too! I hope you have a really good day at work…" He says.

"I will. Now shoo, I need to get dressed." Aya says, laughing a bit as Aki rushes for the door with an "Oh- sorry!"

Aya pulls off her tank top, revealing the light bruise on her rib with clear scarring around it. "Damn… Must've rolled onto it at some point and aggravated things…" She mutters, slipping her arms into her shirt and starting to button it up to hide the markings.

She finishes getting dressed pretty quickly, heading out and immediately met by the sweet scent of something cooking in the kitchen. Naturally, it draws her attention, and a smile tugs at the corners of her mouth as she walks to the kitchen with quiet steps.

Of course, the cook still looks back when Aya enters, bright red hair pulled back into a ponytail that bounces as she moves. "Oh, good- you're up!" Laura smiles warmly at Aya, although she's still working on… What looks like pancakes, but there's definitely something else cooking in the kitchen.

"Good morning…" Aya says with a smile, walking up to Laura to wrap her arms around her waist loosely and give her a sweet kiss.

The kiss can only last for a few moments before Laura reluctantly pulls away to return to making the pancakes, already to the point of using the plates she'd pulled out ahead of time. Aya lets her go and backs up just enough to be out of the way, although Laura isn't avoiding 'accidentally' brushing up against her as she goes.

"Here you are. Happy birthday, darling~" Laura says, and Aya replies with a warm smile as she takes the plate from Laura, although she's interrupted by a kiss before Laura makes the rest of the pancakes. Aya stays nearby as she eats all she can, her curiosity about the other thing cooking clear as she glances towards the stove, realizing that it must be in the oven.

Laura giggles, looking over at Aya before looking back at the food she's dishing up as Aki walks in.

When they finish, Aya walks out with a hug from Aki and a slightly longer than normal kiss from Laura before heading to her car and driving to work… She doesn't expect what she finds when she gets there, though.

"Happy birthday, Aya!" Her coworkers and even the manager got together to wish her a happy birthday, along with getting her one of the good brownies. Altogether it was almost enough to make her cry… Who am I kidding? We all know she cried.

After they had sufficient time to congratulate her at another year, her manager sent her home with the untouched brownie. The first thing she noticed was Brie's car in the parking lot beside where she usually parks. Aya doesn't think too hard on it, assuming Aki had yet again meddled and gotten Brie here for her birthday.

As Aya opens the door, Laura greets her with another kiss as she pulls her inside, Aki going to close the door behind them while Brie, sitting on the couch, averts her eyes for multiple reasons. Laura only releases her from the kiss when she realizes the others are simply averting their eyes and trying to keep their awkward energy at bay without luck.

"Happy birthday, darling." Laura says quietly once they part, a thin trail of saliva connecting their lips for a moment before they actually separate and Laura goes to the kitchen to fetch something.

"Ah- y-yeah, happy birthday, Aya!" Brie says, standing up and kind of awkwardly smiling at Aya, only able to keep her eyes on her for a few moments before looking away.

"Happy birthday big sis!" Aki adds on, smiling brightly as he subtly glances over at Brie to see if she's okay.

Laura returns before Aya can say anything, carrying a pie in her hands with gently flickering candles topping it. As soon as she's in view she starts to sing, and the other two join in very quickly.

It's easy for Aya to pick out each voice, even though they actually harmonize rather well… Needless to say, she didn't realize she knew so many people that could sing well. After the candles are blown out, they divide the pie into several pieces to share with the others. With how little Aya naturally eats, and how much she's had, they'll have more. She still tries to eat as much as she can of the pie, although that still isn't much…

Once they're finished, Brie reveals a present she'd bought a while ago just to give to Aya once she discovered her birthday… Neatly wrapped in paper decorated with flowers, a pair of sketchbooks and a large pack of colored pencils. Something she'd decided on when hearing Aya offhandedly comment that she missed drawing but would always run out of materials too quick and it got expensive. 

Aki… Well, he started by organizing all this, and continued with setting everything up, but he also made her a card and actively collects trinkets all year to give her on her birthday and on Christmas, since he doesn't really get many opportunities to buy things.

And I'm not sure what Laura would get for Aya so I'll just-

All in all, Aya cries multiple times making both Brie and Aki panic because Aya isn't exactly known for happy tears…

The rest of the day is filled with actual joy in the house, which is something that really wasn't common. Brie leaves soon after the presents, however, saying something about how she had to get back home or her mother would get upset.

And thus ends my only happy story~

There's a project I'm working on on my main (@purplexiasphinx) that has the link to a lot of Picrews, including this one, but I'm not sure which link this is... (Look for 🗡)

#laura portwine #aya #aki #brie #birthday #one-shot

[madamhatter]

bigcasinc inquired:  🚼- For Sophie and Jade! send me 🚼 and a ship I’ll use a doll-maker to design what I think a child between our two muses would look like | accepting | @bigcasinc​

made using this picrew: loose carrot maker refer to ‘appearance’ for specifics (and what this maker couldn’t include).

NAME: Emery (A/N.: Or Moira! i’m unsure atm but i like emery a lot)  Leech Hatter AGE: 4~6 GENDER: Female (she/her) APPEARANCE:

Eyes mutated to a gold-brown hazel. No heterochromia like her father. 

Height is 3′2″/96 cm. Reaches to her mom’s waist.

Serrated teeth with a big smile.

Teal hair with silver highlights in it. Hair length at her neck and always picked up/styled. Usually in pigtails with bows or a ponytail with a bow. 

Thick brows and wide eyes like mother. Eye shape and mouth shape like father.

Can look unintentionally terrifying and does not understand she can be scary. She knows her smile can cause reactions (from her mom’s cooing and a barrage of kisses on her rounds cheeks to making people ‘jump’ (if she does a narrow smile like Jade’s or Floyd’s might scare the shit out of adults and children)). Bro, if someone asks her to flash her teeth, she's more than ENTHUSIASTIC to go ‘Okay!!’ and show them off.  

Usually seen worn rompers, pinafore dress w/ an undershirt, or repurposed shirts (from her mom’s childhood closet) and shorts. Always a solid purple, orange, or red top with a patterned shirt underneath it. Always in comfortable footwear for climbing and running or sandals.

PERSONALITY:

Largely a talkative child, with the support of her mother and her sisters as they are receptive and converse whenever something is on Emery’s mind. By ‘talkative,’ she is one who is in constant thought and with high curiosity. It doesn’t mean she outright talks to strangers who pass by her or may even make eye contact with her. 

Blunt without recognizing negative connotations or thoughts. She will speak what is on her mind, which aren’t properly thought through in terms of socialization (not that she cares for that at her age). It follows the same vein as a certain eel, except without the patronizing tone.  IE: “Do not run. You’re slow.” / "I’m fast to catch everyone. That’s easy.” 

Is to an extent clingy to her mother and aunts. She is known to hold onto her mom’s legs or hide underneath her mother’s long skirts whenever she’s talking. Very upfront in greeting those who she knows are close and tries to be polite. (Mostly, this is her trying to mimic how Sophie speaks but it’s WAAAY too dense for Emery sometimes). Though, she likes attention. She hasn’t put two-and-two together, but she knows her mom ‘follows’ her whenever she runs. So, Emery is more committed to running around with her human mother chasing after her and telling her to wait. 

As the last point denotes, she’s pretty perceptive to the people around her and reading them. She’s quick to know that x will get her y. Though, she doesn’t have complex thoughts down at her age yet. She will ask a sleuth of questions which may not have answers for -- but she is one to impose and seek. It’s her way of ‘reading’ the room.

Ecstatic to learn and being hands-on in things. Always behind with her mom to help her out in the kitchen or the hat shop (mainly, taking ribbons) and always tries to peek at the table and countertop. Additionally, she is one that would go out to try to help others -- if not, tell them that her mom can fix anything and lead them to her (explained in personal headcanons).

Emery still gets outright overwhelmed and restless at her age, when it comes to roadblocks and rejection -- especially by peers. She has a big threshold (if not tolerance) for what she takes and usually reciprocates a smile, before going completely quiet. This is where she’ll go into hiding or finds her high energy leaving her fitful and bothered.

SPECIAL TALENTS:

SHIFTER - As half-person and half-merperson, and given her parents’ magical prowl, Emery has the gift of being able to shift between these forms. Being raised on the land, she has defaulted to her two-legs. However, she will be able to morph into her mer-form, which is remarkably similar to her father’s (smaller, with numerous silver spots, and frills). She needs to train herself, but at her age, it will come fairly easily. She needs to be thoroughly dried and taken to a side by the water to help her shift back to her human form (which her mom takes well care of). Emery, however, is not aware of this ability or her heritage. 

HIDE-AND-SEEK CHAMPION - Known to hide in almost any place that she can find, Emery is known by the local children to be practically undetectable when it comes to her hiding spots and when she changes spots. This power is two-fold. She is an exceptional, if not terrifying, seeker. She can’t put her finger on it, but she finds them easily (through smell) and slowly walks over to the other children, patting them, which sends them in a jolt, if not, screaming from terror. However, this talent also comes into play when she feels restless and uncertain, as she’ll go and hide somewhere cramped and dark for comfort. Her mother is able to find her all the time, when at home. There was a point that newborn Emery would only calm down if Sophie made it dark enough and made the right arrangements (use a small carrier, partially covering the crib with a blanket, etc). It is near impossible to draw her out unless it is her mother, sisters, and family friends (or her few close friends).

DURABILITY AND ENHANCED STRENGTH AND SENSES - Comes from merperson heritage. The primary example is her baby teeth that are notably sharp (and will get sharper once her baby teeth fall out) and can draw blood without much effort. Though, she is very careful about this. Another example would be her reaction to pain -- like how she may run into a door or glass with a terribly loud thud and she’d step back, blink, laugh, and continue running after a friend. She isn’t invincible and she can get hurt, but she is definitely more resilient from human children. Can she break bones? Yes! She isn’t yet at that point, however, as she is literally a kid.

INCLUDED: Love for music and rhythm, collect-and-gathering trinkets.

WHO THEY LIKE BETTER:

Given circumstances (refer to #1 personal headcanon), Emery prefers her mom. Though, if she wants to budge her mom or wants something her way, she’ll easily wiggle to bug her aunt Martha, Sophie’s youngest sister, to (try) and get it. Genuinely, there are times where Emery will prefer her aunts over her mom, if not because the three of them group together and indirectly bully Sophie into doing something for their niece.

WHO THEY TAKE AFTER MORE:

Physically, it is undeniable that she takes after Jade more. Blame the dominant genes on his end, but the gold tinge in her eyes, teal hairs, and sharp teeth are the biggest indications of this. I would also extend the thought that she takes on more Jade than one may realize -- if only because her own interactions aren’t as maliciously calculating as her father’s. There are core traits that blend in with Sophie’s, where the edge is there with an unhealthy amount of energy that needs to be burnt off. 

PERSONAL HEADCANONS:

Emery is the unexpected product of Jade and Sophie’s relationship when it was coming to a close. Their relationship ended as soon as they departed from NCR, unsure really what to make of another (as in, be it if they could be long-term partners or they needed to seek out others). They were intimate, friendly, perhaps confidants. But, without a proper title, it was better to depart from their teenage dreams before it spiraled out of control. The discovery was never disclosed. Sophie realized what was going on and refused to reach out. To interfere with what they agreed with - that chapter was over, he went else and so did she. Did she regret agreeing to part ways? Yes, but who’d be that selfish to drag him back? For all she knew, he found better somewhere in the wide world -- maybe even a mate too, which would make this situation extremely problematic.  In this situation, Emery is raised by her single mother and is unaware of her father and likewise, her father is completely unaware of her.

Emery’s concept of destruction and fixing all revolves around her mother. She has a long history of destroying the toys that Sophie has made for her (one of the closest ones being a large purple patchwork bear). But, any time something the stuffing is coming out or the bear is losing an eye, she happily walks over to her mother and Sophie fixes it. She doesn’t quite get there is a point of no-return for certain damages, but she is more than content that with this logic, her mom can fix anything. Hence why she’ll instruct people who ask her questions she doesn’t know (or if they’re upset) to “speak to mama!”

Lots of moray eel behaviors that she performs. A couple of them were mentioned before. But, I have more. One of them happens to be how she interacts with blankets and trying to fall asleep, She ends up rolling around it, wiggling a little helplessly, before laughing and rolling around with it on the mattress. She also does it because she’s a little too excited to go to bed with her mom (both have shared the same mattress)!

Lettie and Martha’s MagiCam accounts, as Sophie either doesn’t have one (or recently made one post-NCR which is private), have some photos and videos of their lovely niece! She happens to pop into photos per accident, only because she’s wondering why her aunts are attempting ten poses and she thinks they’re trying to dance. A fun game that Martha plays with her follows is ‘spot the emmy’ (’emmy’ is her nickname from the hatter trio / sophie specifically calls emery ‘eri’ (pronounced like ending of emery) or tulip/tuli) where a large background photo is available and people have to guess where emery is hiding (in plain sight)! It’s quite popular! There’s also videos of Sophie and Emery interacting, which shows some parts of their personal life. For example, one would be where Sophie squats down tp Emery’s level and ‘blep’ her tongue/stick out her tongue, which Emery does in turn. The ‘bleping’ is something Emery already does.

#( by brackish waters they’d dance on the edge ; unsure of where the next step will end | jade && sophie ) #( checkbooks inquiries and much ; answered asks ) #bigcasinc #[ i originally was going to fill this out as if j.ade made profile(s) for the kids he made up for his fanfic ] #[ but then my mind went ':)' and then I did this ] #[ also yes everyone is getting a profile write-up ] #[ the storyline might be sad af .. but i will die for emery bc i might've spent too much time making her a real character mkgdfg ] #long post tw #long post

[guigz1-coldwar]

'Joint Operation': New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out!

"Joint Operation"

"I'm proud to be who I am..."

Chapter Summary: After making plans about their next moves against Perseus in London, Yirina & Park are now awaiting for John Price to arrive in Century House to get it started...

Link of the Picrew here!

To read it on AO3, click here!

Words : +3500

Taglist : @snowgoldwaylon , @clxudtea , @efingart

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Once that we have agreed on what to do in the parking lot, it was time for us four to get back to our respective offices, now having to not talk of any things that could help the CIA to stop Perseus before us, it was our hard work and we ain't going to let the Americans get the upper hand and stop Perseus we could. Maybe that we're on the same side of the war but here, it's different. It's just going to be us, the MI6...and now, adding to that, the Special Air Service...Captain John Price and his men.

When we came back to our office, the first thing that Park did was to get on the line with Hereford and reach out to Price, asking for his help, and thankfully, we didn't even have to tell any important details to him that he was already agreeing to come with his men but because of some things on his side, he would be only able to come near the end of the afternoon, causing us to get along with it and wait for him and the SAS to arrive in London, Park having to precise that they needed 'the necessary tools for work'.

Now, it was the beginning of a 'normal day' for us: back to our offices and going to work, knowing that now, people were listening to us. We didn't work for the first part of the day until noon as we start to search for every bug that the CIA got, finding some in the lamps, on some drawers, and of course, inside our phones and all of this search by faking a discussion or staying silent, a feeling fo disgust when a hidden bug was found, knowing that we weren't secure in here.

The rest of the day went pretty well: having lunch with Zasha & Portnova in their office and after that, analyzing what's the MI6 got from Peter's apartment and what we saw made our day: Peter had suspicions of the location of where the Perseus members are hiding and it as all pointing out to Canary's Wharf...Lukas Ritter's tracker managing to give us the benefit of the doubt and that's what we were seeing in that detail when the estimated time for Price to arrive was here.

"Should be here soon for me," I said, checking up my watch on my left wrist as I was with Park at her desk, focusing actually on the construction site map of Canary's Wharf. "What do you think about it?" I asked her, who was sitting on her chair with me just behind her.

"I don't know, he said that there were some problems to deal with before getting here," She replied, telling me the same thing she did when she hang out after that phone call.

"At least, we know that he's coming," I muttered, putting my hands on the desk at a few centimeters from the map and the few pen that we were using to write things that we couldn't say loudly.

"Of course," Park alleged as her right hand moves towards one of the pens and a piece of paper to write on it. "How much do you think they could be?" She wrote that pretty quick on that paper, tapping with her pen two times below the sentence.

"Uhm..." I mumbled, grabbing her pen in her hand to write. "Estimated for me? At least 20 to 30," I replied with my writing just right under her sentence. "How many men Price has?" I added to it.

"Enough," Park responded by talking, using a low tone to say it. "Don't worry, we're maybe lower in numbers but the SAS knows how to make the job done," She continued, turning her head towards me. "You know that well," She smiled at me, meaning it.

"Of course," I breathed before I moved softly for a little kiss on her lips but I couldn't know if it was something like that or because I wanted it since our last kiss in the car. "Thanks," I whispered after the kiss, seeing her lips going for a smile, and then, two knocks at our door...

"Who is this?" Park asked, putting herself well on her seat to face the door but the only response we see was the door opening to reveal Portnova with behind them, a man with a dark blue beanie and a large vest on the same color...him, Price.

"Oh, Portnova, good to see you," I exclaimed, happy to see her here and talking a bit loud to make myself heard by the CIA through the bugs.

"Hey, there's John Price from the SAS behind me, he came to see us first," Portnova spoke up, pointing behind her with her left thumb, Price making a sign with his head to say hello, Park doing the same with me to him. "You told us that you wanted to see him so here he is," He said, moving aside to let Price walk in front to enter the room, taking off his beanie.

"Good to see you, Helen," Price grinned at Park, moving next to the chairs in front of her desk and putting his hands on the backrest of one of them.

"Me too, John," She muttered in a low voice, her eyes looking at her right eye with her thumb touching the ring finger.

"Well, I'm leaving you three for now on," Portnova said but then, she moves to my desk to grab a piece of paper & a pen to write something, me going closer to see what she was going to write on it. "Zed is already in the underground parking with Price's men, you'll join us soon," That's what I could see on it after she finished writing, winking at me before she left the office, closing the door behind her.

"So, you know why I ask you to come?" Park started, having her both hands joined together as I got back next to her with the piece of paper in my hands. "Thanks," She said when I gave her the paper, taking a look at quickly.

"Yes, you said that Stone was back and that Perseus was in town," Price replied, staying up behind that chair, maybe thinking that our presence in here will be short. "That you needed support,"

"I do, we do," Park clarified, putting aside the paper before looking back at him. "We both know that we have to work again together for that case and we need you & your men," She clarified, quickly followed by a nod from Price.

"Helen, the SAS is always going to have your back, count on that," He affirmed with a sure tone in his voice, meaning it by a lot as his eyes drifted towards the map that was on the desk, just in front of Park.

"If you want, we can talk about how we can proceed," I told him, scratching the left side of my jaw with my right hand.

"Of course, well..." Price started to say as Park immediately got her hands back on the same pen and another piece of paper to write something else. "My men are waiting for us in the underground parking," He pointed out behind him before looking at the paper Park was showing him.

"CIA listening, tell that you're here to install a temporary HQ in here," Park's writing was looking rather quick but still good looking, showing the note pretty clear to Price

"We're been thinking of installing an HQ in Century House for our ops in town," Price bought it instantly, knowing that she was saying the truth along with me and our gestures. "Maybe that you want to give instructions to them," He advised.

"That's a good idea, John," Park approved of it, her voice sounding like it was going to be better to talk in the parking than talking about here. "Let's go then," She ordered with enthusiasm as she got up from her seat and grab her jacket on its backrest.

I followed the same procedure as her by going back to my desk and grab what I needed: my jacket & my M1911 while Park took with her, the map of the construction site in Canary's Wharf, and of course, her pistol, and then, we were ready to go out of the office, me & Park taking the lead and gesturing to Price that we couldn't talk in here and the hallways before we arrived inside the elevator, the only place with the underground parking that we could talk freely without been heard but instead, we stayed quiet.

Our mouths were kept shut inside the elevator while it was going down to the parking and when we stepped out, the first thing that caught up my eyes was two vans parked near the same car that I & Park used earlier this day with some men around them, talking to each other and hearing the little sound of the elevator's doors opening up caused every looks to be put on us, giving me a sort of little pressure to be observed by those people even if I know that those guys are friendly.

"Finally, we can talk freely, I think," I sighed as we all three start walking towards the car that was having Zasha & Portnova near it, staying on their side alone and away for the moment from Price's men.

"Why the CIA's listening to you?" Price asked by curiosity behind us.

"Because they don't like us, John," Park replied in a clear voice, already taking out the wrapped map from her jacket, making a sign with her at Zasha & Portnova. "For them, we're useful to have what they need...we don't want that, not after what they're doing with us," She added as we arrived near the car, Park unwrapping the map over the car's hood.

"So, this is their hideout?" Zasha demanded as they didn't know about the actual layout of the construction site, we only saw that minutes before Price arrives here.

"Two entrances, multiples covers, and for them, an exit in the Tube," I explained, looking at everything that was put around circles and seemed important by me & Park. "A perfect place to hide for Perseus," I added.

"What about the tracker that you put on Lukas?" Portnova questioned me, crossing her arms.

"Unfortunately, it stopped emitting 30 minutes ago," Park answered at my place to her, not even letting move my lips to speak. "Either they found out about it or they have something blocking it to emit," She theorized as I was in charge of keeping an eye on the tracking device that got off as she said 30 minutes ago.

"A jammer?" Price mumbled, his left hand below his chin and adopting a thinking attitude. "It could be possible but now, they're going to think that's something off," He presumed, me & Park nodding at him about that. "And that's where we all coming,"  He added as he got his hands over the map. "What's your plan, Helen?" He demanded, looking at her.

"To start, I think that we should get two teams striking the entrances," She started, moving her fingers on the map to point to the two entrances she mentioned. "The one at that warehouse should be the first one to go on with discretion," She suggested as she looks at everyone to see our reaction to that. "And then, we launch the attack, stealth isn't and can't be used during a large part of the operation,"

"Two teams, two entrances, it should work perfectly," Price speculated, his eyes looking at the map as if he was analyzing it for a better opinion on it. "The only problem is that we have to react quickly to eliminate that group before they could use the Tube," He said, his fingers over the side of the map that was getting inside a part of the metro.

"I'm sure that we can do it," I proclaimed like that, getting a bit enthusiastic to get Perseus out of London.

"I'm sure too," Zasha joined in with me in my statement. "Your men, sir, are very good elements, we can do it quickly," They complimented, their eyes drifting to look at the group of people in SAS uniforms near the first van that was near us.

"Thank you, Smirnov," Price thanked them, giving them a nod to that compliment. "Now, we should organize to see who is doing what," He declared, crossing his arms as Portnova suddenly decide to go away from us without any words, walking to get leaned on a pole that was almost 10 meters from us.

"Well...Uhm...I think that I want to volunteer to be with the group going first," I said, raising my left hand to that, wondering inside of me why I did this.

"I'm in too," Zasha joined me in raising their hand, making my eyes go wide for a bit. "What about you, Park?" They demanded towards her who was thinking by looking at the map.

"I'll choose, don't worry," She simply replied, not moving her head away from the map. "If you wish, I'll talk about the details with Price alone," She stated.

"As you wish, Park," I told her, making a lovely tap over her left shoulder before we decide along with Zasha to leave Park & Price alone but Zasha quickly left me to join the group they were looking at before as for me, I needed to see Portnova.

She was all alone, leaned on that pole, arms crossed and looking away from everyone. When she first walk away from the group, no one wondering why she left except me, I wanted to know why she was like that...was she thinking about something bad? Perseus was now aware that she was alive following the assassination attempt at the University of London and since, I was sometimes able to see that she wasn't looking well & secure to be around, surely because we were having a big target on our backs...something that needed to be erased...

"Portnova?" I called out with a low voice as I approach her in a slow walk.

"Yes?" She muttered, her eyes looking down at her feet.

"Are you alright?" I demanded, arriving right next to her at least 1 meter from her. "I saw you leaving the group seconds ago and...I'm worried," I clarified myself in case, even joining my hands together, looking like a shy girl.

"I wish I could say yes and I don't want to say no," She responded, turning softly her head at me, her face seeming neutral for me. "I know that I shouldn't be like that but it's hard to believe that...even with every try, Perseus is always here," He sniffed.

"I know, it's hard," I joined her on that thought.

"I want to live a perfect life with Zasha, having them with me while the two of us are working at our respective workplace: me as a teacher, them...I'm not sure if they want to stay a cryptographer but..." She stopped herself for a few seconds to take a deep breath. "Not having a feeling to been watched, listened and threatened by someone," She resumed in a lower voice, sounding neutral for me.

"That's what you told me...three years ago," I exclaimed, crossing my arms as I had flashes in my head showing me my memory with her near the Moskova. "You were scared, I had a memory with you last night...a meeting near the Moskova, away from the city," I explained

"So, you remember that day..." She whispered with a little grin at me. "I'm still scared about this...since that day," She said, her voice sounding broken as she pass her hands below her eyes. "No, I'm not crying here...not at all," She defended herself despite that tears were visible on her face, hiding them with her hands.

"It's okay, you can cry, we all do that one day," I confided with the truth on that subject, everyone can be having a bad moment...crying is normal. "Listen, I'm still sorry about...the three years that passed with....you alone, I'll make sure...we'll make sure that Perseus will be destroyed," I commented, giving my apologies about that situation she faced alone...even if I already told them.

"I know, thank you," She grinned at me

"No...thank you for...being a great friend, Portnova," I thanked her back as she was meaning a lot as a friend for me, along with Zasha, adding a friendly tap over her right shoulder to fully mean it entirely.

"Well, thanks," She whispered, still smiling at me while I did it too as her eyes suddenly got focused behind me. "Seems that Zed is talking to their friends," She stated, making me turn around to look and see Zasha talking with three people: someone with a sort of mohawk haircut...like Freya, a man with a black hood on and a white skull as a decal, and then, a man with a helmet and a black hood too.

"I didn't know that they were friends with them," I confessed as Portnova move away from the pole she was leaned on to join me at my side.

"They told me that after Price showed up," She explained, crossing her arms as we were looking at the group. "I think they are Soap, Ghost &...Roach," She revealed to me, her voice getting a bit sounding confused at the end. "What the hell kind of a name is Roach?" She asked me.

"Don't know but...why don't we join Zasha to talk with them?" I proposed to her and it's without any hesitation from me & her that we decide to join the group, observing that Zasha was the one to talk mainly in it.

"Hi, miss Grigoriev," The mohawk guy spoke first with a Scottish accent as he was sitting on the back of the van, the back doors widely as the inside was looking like an armory...he's Soap. "And...you must be Zasha's wife, I presume?" He demanded, pointing out at Portnova.

"That's correct," Portnova replied with a smile as Soap offered his hand to her.

"John 'Soap' Mactavish, call me simply Soap," He presented himself as he & Portnova shook hands before they withdraw from each other. "Here's our Ghost," He pointed at the man with a black hood and a white skull decal.

"Pleasure to meet you both," The man said, surprising me with the voice he used, feeling it very deeper and...unusual.

"And here's Roach," Soap finished, his hand pointing towards the man with a helmet and the hood, leaned against one of the backdoors of the van.

"Hi, misses..." The man waved at us, sounding rather shy in his voice and we waved back at him.

"They are my friends," Zasha told me, their hands joining together and they were sounding a bit unsure to tell it actually, their gestures looking like a shy person. "We...I met and talk with them during & after our mission in Cuba,"

"A pretty good sniper, they told us that you're the woman that formed them in it," Soap exclaimed, addressing himself towards me.

"The kid has a good heart, same for you as I heard," Ghost added, crossing his arms as he looked at me through his black hood.

"Well, Zasha is my best friend for years...almost 9 years to be honest," I admitted as Zasha was looking at me with a smile, giving me some hope as I was like opening myself to those guys. "I'm doing my best as I can,"

"You...you did good," Roach implored, getting Soap & Ghost eyes on him.

"Of course, that's good, we're doing the same thing with you," Soap told him as he joined his hands together over his legs.

"Everyone," Then, we all heard Price's voice calling us out and getting our attention on him & Park who was standing next to him. "As you could know, we're fighting Perseus again and today, we have a chance to bring them down in London and maybe in England if we can," He started, his hands around his waist.

"Perseus' agents are hiding in a construction site in Canary's Wharf and we think that they could leave tonight, we're striking them today," Park spoke up, making her voice loud & clear for everyone who was now gathered to see them as for us, we didn't move at all from our spot.

"There will be two teams: one led by me & Park while the other will be led by Grigoriev," He announced, making my eyes goes wide at this. "Soap, Ghost, Roach, Griffin & Wallcroft, you'll be with her, the others, with me & Park," He continued as my jaw was dropped discreetly at this but not because I was going to led a SAS team. "Prepare your equipment, we'll be leaving soon," He ordered clearly, causing everyone to split up.

"Park," I called her as I walk towards her. "You...you're not coming in the same team with me?" I demanded, wondering why...just why...

"Don't worry, Yiri," She started with a little smile at me. "It's just for the beginning, the attack will get us back, don't worry about it, and like the SAS say..." She advised me, stopping in her words before pulling me in for a quick kiss on the lips before she looked back at me, a face that wanted to me stay calm and not worry about this...

"Stay frosty!"

#cod bocw #cod cold war #cod black ops cold war #cod cw #call of duty cold war #cod #call of duty #cod bell #black ops cold war #fem!bell #yirina grigoriev #helen park #bell x park

[guigz1-coldwar]

'Brother': New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out !

"Brother"

"You need to stay strong...a warrior believing in our Greater Russia..."

Chapter Summary: The investigation at Peter's place put Yirina's mood in a bad way, impossible to express how she feels to Park and to talk to her, now trying to forgive herself about that and just trying to forget things...

Link of the Picrew used !

To read it on AO3, click here!

Words : +3200

Taglist : @snowgoldwaylon , @clxudtea , @efingart

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

What I saw inside Peter's apartment didn't actually give me a better mood from earlier today, acting a bit different than I usually am and finding myself rude at some point with Park when she was forgiving herself to me again for what she did. Peter was leading his own investigation against the Collective and hidden from the MI6 sight and I found out that even to him, I couldn't be fully trusted because of my past of having been 'Perseus child' and that, I should have known that even some people around me could still not see me as an ally because of what happened.

I came back to the car alone, wanting to have some relief and trying to think about myself as some cars were arriving on the street picking my curiosity and preparing my M1911 in the case of a surprise, ready to open fire before realizing that it was just the MI6 cleaning crew that was coming after Park made her call to them, me staying in the car as a witness of the scene while Park was supervising that part outside, guiding the others who were transporting card boxes outside to their car's trunks...all of Peter's work landing right into the MI6 hands and it was a lot at seeing those filled up boxes in their hands.

Once that this little cleaning was done in more than 20 minutes, the agents left the place, Park going back to the car to drive away and return to Century House for the car and then, walking back to the apartment but during those moments, I didn't move my lips once to start a discussion or to respond to Park who was trying on her own to do so with me, wanting to talk about things that weren't linked to what she did and our pasts but even with that happening, my lips stayed sealed during the drive and our walk back to the apartment until arriving in our bedroom.

Undressing and removing myself from the clothes I took with me as Park was looking sad, still trying to talk to me but nothing wanted to come out, not a goddamn word would be wanted to escape from my mouth despite that I would have like to do it, my mood wasn't just allowing me that to happen as it just wanted me to lay down on that bed in front of me and that's what I did, doing it without saying a word and looking away from Park, blank stare at the wall on my side of the bed.

Deep inside of me, I was feeling so bad for leaving Park without telling her what was wrong with me...everything was wrong, it was easy to think & guess but saying was harder...always been harder. To try to forgive me to her for this, I managed to turn around on the bed to look at her uncovered back, seeing those scars from her days in prison and the only thing I could do...was a cuddle with my arms, wrapping them around her and her reaction...I didn't want to know what she was going to think about it as I shut my eyes, drifting into sleep.

Two knocks...two knocks were the first things I could hear when I found myself standing upright in front of Zasha's apartment door in Moscow, dressed in my civilian's clothes: a dark green denim jacket, a black buttoned shirt, grey fingerless gloves blue jeans, and a pair of black boots, going over the bottom of my jeans. I was looking a bit worried about something I couldn't know before I starts to hear some footsteps coming through the door before it opened slowly but not entirely.

"Oh," I heard someone gasp at my sight before I could see Dedov behind the door, his body covering the space between the door and its frame. "That's...that's you, Yirina," He said, a little smile on his face.

"Hey, Dedov," I waved at him with my left hand, smiling too. "Is there Zasha here?" I asked him, trying to look inside but it was impossible as Dedov was on the way.

"Zeze?" I nodded at him. "No, they aren't here, they left to have a date with Portnova," He replied at me, his hands getting on the door.

"Oh okay, I thought that they will be here," I said, sounding a bit confused about it, scratching my right arm with my left hand.

"Well, that wasn't planned but the two didn't see each other since you & them...you know, left for your job in...Solovetsky, right?" He demanded, sounding curious.

"Yeah, it was more complicated than we thought and our work didn't allow us to make personal calls," I responded, my left hand crossing along my upper body to join the back of my head, scratching it. "I'm sorry about this," I apologized.

"No worries, it's okay if it was for your job," He exclaimed, accepting my apologies before a little weird silence got itself between the two of us as if it was impossible to find something to talk about.

"Uhm, since that Zasha isn't here...I guess that..."

"Oh no, you can come in," Dedov offered, getting the door open for me before leaning on the ground to catch the little Beans that was going for a run outside. "As for you, you can't come out, I told you that," He said, pointing at the cat who meowed at him, sounding a bit not understanding why she wasn't allowed to leave the place.

"Oww," I moaned at this scene, seeing Beans' eyes going into a cute mood focused on Dedov. "That's so cute," I affirmed, grinning as Dedov got Beans in his arms, holding her like a baby and giving her cuddles.

"Come in, I insist," Dedov insisted, gesturing at me to enter the apartment and seeing that there was nothing that was going to make me occupied, I decided to agree on his proposal and stepped inside the apartment. "You maybe want something? Tea? Coffee?"

"No, I wouldn't want to steal from Zasha's coffee reserves," I scoffed, him closing the door behind me while still holding Beans in his left arm before he laughed about it.

"Got lucky that the reserves didn't go down during the days you weren't here...well, until now," He added, releasing a friendly laugh at that remark from him. "The first thing they did when they come back after hugging me was to take one coffee...no, two...or three,"

"Put the blame on the coffee machines back at Solovetsky," I proclaimed, moving with him to the living room who was well cleaned up, a little TV turned on. "Coffee over there was awful, had to spit it multiples times, that's explaining why Zasha needed some...necessary caffeine in them," I continued, taking a breath as I walk next to the couch.

"I'm pretty sure that right now, they're arguing with Portnova about having another cup of coffee during their date," Dedov presumed, arriving in the room after me as he was just closing a door from the hallway leading to the living room.

"Them & their coffee," I muttered, rolling my eyes around before deciding to get sit on the couch.

"Go on, Beans, I'm letting you go," Dedov whispered as he leaned down to let Beans go back on the ground on her paws, directly taking the direction of the kitchen. "To say, it's nice to have an animal with me,"

"Sounds nice, shame that I didn't have the same luck on that part," I expressed, putting my hands on my lap, Dedov turning around to me with a curious face. "I can't have any animals with me at my apartment and because of a lot of things,"

"Why that?" He asked, starting to move towards a seat near the main couch. "Is this because you're not allowed to have animals in the place you're living?" I nodded.

"That but also because I can't let a little cat or puppy alone at my place while I'm away, my position isn't really helping me," I started, staying positive in my voice and gestures, feeling a bit sad to talk about it to him. "And also because I would have trouble to take care of an animal,"

"Like, you need someone else with you for that or...you want to have one but your current life isn't helping?" He guessed, me nodding at the second part of his question.

"Freya is there...well, not always here but our lives aren't allowing us to do that and even, I have to convince Freya about having either a cat or a puppy,"  I fully answered, my fingers tapping over my legs in a slow pace. "She's like me but she doesn't see the interest of having an animal with us, you know?" I added. "I don't want to force her much about this,"

"I understand," Dedov agreed, us both getting on the same line of thinking about that subject as he got himself comfy on his seat. "You know, I never thought that Freya was Norwegian, her name wasn't sounding very Russian to me," He commented.

"Yes, she is, Norwegian at heart," I smiled, just by thinking about it. "Even if she's been working with Perseus since we're been raised together by him, she's a patriot, she doesn't want to see Scandinavia getting caught in the Cold War," I continued, giving a part of the vision on her actually.

"I see, seems normal," Dedov simply told, his face telling that talking about Freya wasn't in fact the best idea of the moment, maybe thinking that he wouldn't want to have her name pronounced. "To change, why...Uhm...why did you want to see Zasha?" They asked me, turning his head to perceive Beans coming from the kitchen and in my direction.

"To give them..." I moved my right arm to reach the inside of my jacket, grabbing a sort of white envelope in my hand. "To give to you two some money," I revealed, handing over the envelope to him.

"Uhm..." He was looking a bit hesitating to take it in his hands before he resigned himself to do so. "Why?" He asked, starting to open the envelope to see the money inside.

"Money isn't my reason to live and if I can secure better tomorrows for you & Zasha, I will," I admitted, joining my hands together while Beans was starting to caress herself along my feet. "I don't need too many things to live with,"

"Like...why you don't try to pleasure yourself?" He demanded, putting the envelope on the little brown table that was separating us, the sounds of the Soviet National Anthem emitting from the TV in a low tone. "I'm not saying that you shouldn't do this but...why you don't try to...you know what I mean..."

"I'm not a person that wants to show what she did, I just want to have a normal life," I replied, feeling Beans around my legs and prompting me to take her over my lap as she was insistent to get petted by me. "I can understand that my actions aren't the best for me, you ain't the only one who told me that: Freya, Perseus & even Zasha at some time," I added, gesturing with my left fingers for counting while my right hand was stroking Beans' head. "I know that I should profit from my life but can I really enjoy it when the person I'm working with is a terrorist?"

"I...I don't know," He said, having no answer to it as I thought, he couldn't tell me how. "Me, I know that living here in Moscow isn't the thing I want to do for the rest of my life," He proclaimed, Beans moving her head towards him. "I want to go to Yale, Havard or better, Oxford," He told me.

"Western Universities?" He nodded at me.

"Hard to say but that's my dream," He claimed, smiling. "Zeze wants the 'best for their brother' as they sometimes said to Portnova but about that, it's a bit hard to make it true," He confessed, staying silent to listen to him. "What do you think about it?" He asked.

"I'm not the one to ask about something like this but yeah, I hope that you'll live your dream," I responded, trying to give my best opinion on the surprise question he asked me.. "Don't worry, Dedov, we'll find a solution for that," I said with a little smile to him before I looked at Beans, still caressing the top of her head as she was laid down on my lap.

"What do you think about it, our little Beans?"

I tried to not think about what was Park's reaction when my arms wrapped around her to give her cuddles to forgive myself but when I slowly opened my eyes in her direction, I was already feeling that something was wrong...my arms were both against the bed, wrapped around just nothing, my brain taking seconds to realize that Park wasn't here in the bed with me and in the seconds I realized that I was mixed between getting panicked or not...maybe that she was already prepared and taking breakfast, the time saying 8:24 AM.

Panic, not panic, panic, not panic...that's what I thought, and honestly, I shouldn't be panicking for that. So, after a bit of calming myself down a bit, I got up from the bed to get inside my clothes, using the same one I used last night when we had to move away in an emergency. Thinking about that while putting on my jeans was making me wonder how Zasha & Portnova will take the news, the bad having happened: Peter was missing and may be dead while Sarah was abducted by Perseus.

With a big deep breath once I put my light green jacket around me that I walk to open the door, getting out of the room to join up the others in the dining room but then...as I moved to the room and entering it, there was only Zasha present at the table with only their side of the table filled with cutlery and food as the other place were empty.

"Uhm...are you alone?" I asked them, looking around the room and to the living room part behind me, having seen no one except them here. "Where's Park? Portnova?"

"Portnova is still sleeping, she got a bad dream and I had to give her some water at 4 AM," They replied at first, sounding a bit low in their voice. "Very bad dream," They added.

"And...and Park?" I continued, my voice breaking down for that but also for hearing about Portnova, seeing that memory when I talked with her alone near the Moskova.

"You should sit down, okay?" Zasha proposed. "Have breakfast, will you?"

"Where's Park, Zasha?" I demanded, insisting on it despite their pleas before they moved away from their chair to face me.

"She's...she left earlier," They revealed, looking impossible for them to look at me in the eyes. "I tried to convince her to wait for you but she said that she got a call from the MI6, had to go before us," They added to their response, making me think that she probably didn't like my attitude with her last night.

"Shit, fuck," I cursed, shaking my head about that. "I'm going in too now," I said, starting to move to get to the front door before Zasha stepped in front of me.

"Yirina, you need to take breakfast and..." They started, moving their hands above my shoulders, wanting to say something else than this but..."Just sit down and eat something, would you?" They demanded at me, our eyes meeting again and pleading with mine.

"Fine," I sighed in a bad mood, turning around to walk towards the seat I'm always using, Zasha staying at their spot. "Did...did she told you about..." I sit on the chair, looking at them.

"Peter & Sarah?" They guessed, nodding at me. "Yeah, she did...fucking bad to hear that," They moved away to go back to their seat, my eyes crossing around the food they were having near them. "I just can't believe it,"

"I'm sorry," I apologized, my hands getting on the top of the table before crossing my arms. "Did you know if the two had families?" I asked them

"No, the two were mostly discreet in their personal lives, Peter was the one doing it the most," They responded, making me do a silent sigh away from them by looking down at my lap. "Even if we know each other since I became an MI6 agent, the two weren't willing to talk about them," They continued, crossing their arms like me.

"I'm sorry about having to make you learn that, Zed," I apologized again, tapping my fingers on my arms at a slow & silent pace, a silence coming between us that someone needed to break. "Uhm...I've got two memories back last night, you...do you want to know?" I changed the subject for the moment, unsure if the subject I chose was better.

"Tell," They simply said.

"The first one was talking with Portnova along the Moskova, only with her," I started, concentrating myself to remember it well. "She was scared about how things were happening days after...Dedov left," I added, seeing them froze in place at hearing their brother's name. "That's the first time I saw her cry in tears, it was troubling,"

"I know...she's never like that," Zasha exclaimed, their voice sadder than ever at saying it.

"The second one....it's Dedov," I admitted, thinking that I shouldn't be talking of Dedov with Zasha, knowing the current state of Dedov now. "We talked about you, things and...yeah, we talked," I breathed, stopping myself in my words, looking at Zasha who was saddened of hearing more & more about Dedov, remembering the moment I told them of Dedov's state. "My night was hard to live, things are still shitty, I didn't talk to Park at all since we left Peter's place and I'm feeling bad about a lot of things, a fucking lot," I said, holding back my tears inside of me and moving my arms on my lap.

"You don't need to..."

"Feel bad? Why shouldn't I be good?" I asked them, cutting them straight in their words. "No, I can't, I'm just trying my best to not convince myself to end the misery that I call my life," I told them like that, going up from my seat, without having eaten anything. "I want to save Dedov, to make Park & everyone happy and that we can destroy Perseus but my life is just getting resumed at reliving almost each night something that is saying that my life is filled with trauma, I'm going to live with that for months, even years," I raised up my voice as I moved to the front door, Zasha this time doing nothing to stop me.

"Yirina, I...you don't need to feel bad," They insisted, finishing their sentences that they couldn't finish. "I know the pain you're facing with...that brainwashing bullshit, we're all here for you,"

"Yeah but...I can't feel myself alone and each day, I'm getting lonely inside myself, discovering about who was 'Yirina Grigoriev' before she was left for dead on an airstrip in Turkey," I muttered, putting my hands on the front door handle to open it. "I'm holding my promises, don't worry, Zasha," I then opened the door, ready to leave for Century House before I turned around to look at them, a look of sadness on our both faces...

"I'm trying my best but I'm holding my promises to everyone,"

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