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collecting-stories · 4 years

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Babe - John B Routledge

Request: Hi, welcome back and I hope everything is going okay with you. I absolutely love all of your stuff and was wondering if you could something with John B and the reader are together and maybe she's having a baby or something and he's protective of her if you're okay with that. If not it's cool and anything fluffy with him is okay. thank you

A/N: Just like fluff...

Outer Banks Masterlist

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John B had inherited a lot of things from Big John when he died. Some were objects; the house, the twinkie, the furniture, and some weren’t things you could hold in your hand; the way he ran his tongue over his molars when he was thinking, how he always pulled the toast out of the toaster too soon, the color of his eyes.

Something he had most certainly not inherited from his father was the flood of anxiety that settled in his stomach when you found out you were pregnant. Just twenty, the two of you were not the kind of couple that imagined weddings and joint checking accounts and babies. You talked about traveling and the possibility of leaving all the inherited messes of your parents behind. But then you got pregnant and after a million conversations at every conceivable hour you both decided that keeping the baby was something you wanted to do. You had one more year of college and the baby would be born in the summer, allotting you a coincidentally perfect timeline. John B had a good job. The Chateau was paid for and all the things inside were yours now.

All the things outside too, including the chickens.

“I wanted a cat, you know...maybe a dog. Something furry and cute, that I could pet.” You muttered, soaked through your shorts and top, carrying a chicken beneath your arm. Learning how to wrangle a loose chicken had not been something you ever dreamed of doing in your life and having to use that knowledge when you were six months pregnant was far from a dream come true.

You opened the coop, pushing the chicken back in and mentally adding the little building to your list of things that needed to be repaired on the property. The sound of the twinkie pulling in caught your attention as you stood up, turning to see John B already with a frown as he parked and got out of the car.

“You’re supposed to be in bed!” He called, door slamming after him as a punctuation of sorts.

“I was...but your dad’s chickens decided to orchestrate a prison break.” You replied. Big John had become the third member of the household somewhere along the line, an invisible entity that you and John B could blame everything on. If the water heater broke than Big John must not’ve installed it right. If the eletric went out than Big John had wired the house wrong. The chickens escaped and it was Big John who had built a faulty coop.

“I would’ve gotten them,” John B insisted, “you’re soaking wet. You’re going to get a cold.”

“It’s like a million degrees outside Bird, I’m not getting a cold.” You laughed.

“Well what if it was colder out?”

“What if a tornado swept through and I got sucked into it?”

“I’m not joking,” John B said, all the sternness of his dad apparently just waiting to find purpose in him.

The protectiveness was not his father’s though. That was all John B. You had known the Routledge family so long that your mom remembered John B’s. And she had sworn, the first time she watched her future son-in-law, whenever you decided to stop ‘living in sin’, that Big John couldn’t have been bothered if a house fell on his pregnant wife. John B wasn’t like that at all. Attentive, always concerned, the math skills that he had pushed aside to focus on work after his dad died came in handy as he calculated every moment of every year that you would be raising a kid. Knowing that, and because you just couldn’t help yourself, sometimes you teased him.

“What if we have a second kid? We could have them close together.”

“Absolutely not. This place barely qualifies as a two bedroom as it is.” He’d argue, sitting on the kitchen counter eating cereal in the morning while he window shopped for baby furniture on his phone. You’d never seen someone navigate and barter on Facebook better than he did.

“As long as they can fit through the window it qualifies.” You replied.

“No.”

“You’re no fun.”

“I’m trying to bid on this crib...I need complete concentration.” John B replied.

A lot of people who knew the two of you were quick to tell you that you were throwing away your futures. You would never tell any of them but it was something that you and John B had discussed regularly for the first few weeks. Now though, when people saw your young age and your very pregnant state, they felt obligated to weigh in on your life decision as if they were a part of the small family that you and John B were creating together.

“Don’t you think you should have waited?” It seemed the echoed question on everyone’s lips. Shouldn’t you have waited, until you had a better house, more money, were finished college, had a stable job. Maybe, you wanted to answer, probably. But you always just shrugged. It was what it was at think point.

Kiara’s dad was not the first to ask you a resoundingly simple “why John B?”.

“Don’t you want someone responsible?” Was his follow up.

You weren’t sure if it was just ill-worded or if everyone in the Outer Banks had some pre-conceived idea about John B’s ability to be both a parent and an adult but you knew something none of them did.

“I swear to god if you don’t get inside I will carry you,” John B called, standing in the doorway of the Chateau, looking completely exasperated.

“Good luck,” you laughed, standing in the spray of the sprinkler in a bathing suit that made you thankful you didn’t have neighbors too close. It was boiling inside the house and the measly fan that John B had produced while he tried to put the air conditioners in was doing a terrible job of cooling you and your eight month pregnant stomach off.

“I’m not joking,” he came down the stairs two at a time, walking across the lawn to you.

“No!” You laughed, trying to get away from him but failing miserably as he grabbed your arms. “John B! It’s too hot inside!”

“You’re not supposed to be on your feet, at least lay in the hammock.” He rolled his eyes at you, annoyed as ever as he got hit with water from the sprinkler.

“The sprinkler doesn’t reach the hammock.” You pointed out, walking toward the trees as he pushed you along.

“I’ll buy you a pool to sit in.” He promised.

John B was slowly but surely fixing up the entire house, transforming the once crumbling Chateau into something that felt much more like home than it ever had before. Old furniture was being replaced with new, his dad’s office had been cleaned out and the walls had been painted for a nursery. It was only a matter of time before the house that John B had inherited from his father became the place he would raise his own kid. There was no denying that John B had inherited a lot from his father, some good, most bad, but the part of him that checked every door and window before he went to bed, that paid every bill on time and scrounged to save whatever extra he could, the part that had been waiting in anticipation for a baby was not inherited from anyone. That part was all John B.

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petty-revenge-stories · 5 years

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Won't train your obnoxious dog? Maybe you should feel the consequences too.

This wasn't entirely planned but it worked out brilliantly in the end.

My first job after grad school didn't pay that well and housing was expensive but I found a room in a house that seemed pretty nice and the owner let me bring my cat. The biggest problem with the place was the owner's dog. He was a young lab with lots of energy and zero training or exercise or discipline of any kind.

I had to leave my bedroom door open so my cat could get to his food and litter box but the dog soon figured out how to get past my makeshift barrier and eat all of the cat food. I bought a baby gate and installed it on my door. That lasted a few days until he figured out how to climb over it. I put it up higher but he figured out how to push it hard enough to knock it down. He was also tall enough to reach the cat's dish, even up on my dresser.

I was getting tired of feeding all of my expensive cat food to this glutton of a dog and his owner wouldn't do a thing about it. I had an old low-current electric fence charger that I had used to keep a previous roommate's dog out of our garden. I stapled some chicken wire to an old doormat to make a ground and ran a bare wire along the top of the baby gate. I hooked up both to the fence charger and the next day and when I got home from work the gate and food were untouched. I would turn off the charger while I was home and turn it on when I left in the morning and it worked great for a few days.

The next week I get home from a long day, step over the gate and sit down to take off my boots. The homeowner walks over and stands in front of my door yammering on about something, barefoot, wearing shorts, on the still-active doormat. Her dog comes along and squeezes his head past her bare leg and onto the top of the gate, making contact with the hot wire. The gate shocks both of them and I sit on the floor laughing while she cusses a blue streak at the dog.

I know the dog's bad behavior wasn't his fault, he was just being a young, energetic dog who had nothing to do all day. I was delighted when the gate managed to shock his owner, who was the real source of the problem.

The dog eventually learned to stop touching the gate and I was able to unplug the charger for the last two months I lived there. I was so glad when I could finally afford to escape that chaos.

tl;dr I set up a hot-wire to keep my landlord's dog out of my room and it shocked both the dog and his owner.

(source) story by (/u/katlian)

#pettyrevenge #by /u/katlian #petty revenge #revenge story #petty revenge stories #revenge stories #last10

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fencearmor · 2 years

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Getting a Pet? Top Things to Do to The Backyard Before Bringing Fido Home

Are you thinking of getting a pet? First off, well done on bringing an animal into the home and letting the family enjoy the fun of a pet. The family will now have years of love and loyalty ahead of them. If getting a dog, you may need to do a few things to the backyard. Making the backyard fence for a pet safe is top of the list, but there are a few other things to do as well.

At Fence Armor® we know the fun of having a pet, and we also know how you want them to be safe in the backyard. A backyard fence for a pet needs to be solid and secure before Fido, or whatever his name will be, comes home. You do not want the dog or cat running away or being stolen when you are not home.

Included on our list of things to do to the backyard before you bring a pet home is:

Install the right fence in the backyard

Repair the backyard fence for a pet

Grow some grass

Build a run to keep them exercised

Fence Armor® Post Guards give fence post protection

Let’s take a closer look at each point.

Install the right fence in the backyard

You will need a fence to keep your pet safe. If you do not have the right fence, any pet will escape and may never be seen again. Your pet will also be in danger from wildlife or even from someone looking to steal it. Installing the backyard fence for a pet should be priority number one.

A privacy fence will keep most pets safe. They will not be tempted to run off after a passing car or even follow the kids going to school. If you already have a rail fence, you will need to fit chicken wire to the structure to keep your pet from escaping. Pet-proofing your fence is essential.

Repair the backyard fence for a pet

Now is the time for doing some fence maintenance. You should repair the backyard fence for a pet to be safe when out of the house. Take a walk along the fence line and look for broken rails or loose posts. You can be sure that the cute puppy you bring home will find all the weak spots. A secure backyard fence for a pet will keep them on the right side of it at all times. Make sure they cannot burrow under by building raised beds along the fence line. If installing a new backyard fence for a pet, see if you can bury the bottom rails in concrete to keep Fido from escaping.

Grow some grass

If you are getting a pet, they will need somewhere to sit and take in the sun. If you do not already have a lawn, make some space for one in the backyard. It is not fair for the pet to sit on concrete or gravel when they are relaxing.

The new lawn does not need to be a large area, just the right size for your pet to get some exercise. It will help if you put it close to the house to see the pet is safe at all times. Install the backyard fence for a pet around the new lawn area to keep the pet safe.

Build a run to keep them exercised

Dogs need plenty of exercise every day, and this can be good for you too when you go for your daily walks. If you are not at home, the new arrival could have a run outside. A dog run in the backyard is a big help for any pet.

A run is easy to build, and you can construct it when installing the backyard fence for a pet before it arrives. Using the same fencing materials, make a space at least four feet wide and about ten or fifteen feet long. The dog will love running up and down and getting plenty of exercise when you are at work.

Fence Armor® Post Guards give fence post protection

When installing a fence in the backyard fence for a pet, always think about the future. You will need to maintain the fence, and fence post protection is vital. A new puppy will love sharpening their teeth on the fresh wood, and a kitten will sharpen its claws there. A rabbit will like a chew in the mornings.

Fence Armor® Post Guards give fence post protection. They are made from American stainless steel and will not rust, buckle, split or lose shape during their long years of service. The post guards fit around the foot of the post and give fence post protection against pets, trimmers, and lawnmowers.

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yellowhouseinthecity-blog · 5 years

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Quail Coop / Rabbit Hutch

Animal housing is a really critical element of animal husbandry. Recently I acquired some quail in exchange for goatsitting. I wanted to build something that would work for both quail and rabbits, as I planned on butchering the quail.

Part 1: Design

Habitat - both quail and rabbits like to be close to the ground. This design gives them a place to feel secure while allowing them to graze a little bit (slim pickings in January, but still). It’s also large enough for a small group of quail or a rabbit doe and a little of kits.

Hygiene - Instead of cleaning out droppings from a stationary enclosure, I’m just moving this tractor frequently enough to avoid much manure build-up. Making the pen lightweight and durable was critical. I may install small wheels on the back later on as the wooden frame does tend to ‘drag’ more than I’d like.

Access - It’s always important to me to have really good access to animals when designing their enclosure. You don’t want to have a coop or hutch that has places you can’t reach the animals safely and comfortably (for you AND the animal). Most livestock we keep are essentially prey animals and respond best to handling when they don’t feel totally cornered!

Protection - Of course, one of the main reasons we put animals in cages in the first place is to protect them from predators and weather. Predators in this area include foxes, loose/stray dogs, feral cats, and hawks. A couple very critical points:

Chicken wire can effectively prevent digging out, but you should never count on it against fox or raccoon protection. Instead, use “hardware cloth” or welded wire. (I tend to stick to 1/2″x1/2″ wire.)

In the MidAtlantic climate, most animals used to living outdoors tolerate winter just fine and need more help staying cool in summer. People tend to be very worried about water freezing and animals being cold when really heat stress is a much bigger concern (think of it this way: rabbits are always wearing fur coats they cannot take off!).

I used a polycarbonate plastic panel for the roof, selecting UV protection as the “color” to block some of the UV. I also plan on moving this hutch to shady areas when it’s hot, and sunny areas when it’s cold--an advantage of moveable housing.

The final design factor is cost. Most of the dimensions of this coop are informed by standard building materials dimensions. The overall coop measures 6′ long by 2′ high at the higher end and 18″ high at the shorter end. It’s 2′ deep and the enclosed box part of the coop is about 2′ wide. Hardware cloth comes in rolls 24″ wide, and a standard 2x4″ board can be ripped into (2) 2x2′s. The roof panel was available in a 6′x2′ section as well.

Part 2: Materials

Materials:

2x4″ x10′ boards (I believe I bought 6 but had about a full board left over)

hardware cloth (1/2″x1/2″)

chicken wire (you could also use hardware cloth or welded wire for the bottom, I just had enough chicken wire leftover from another project and it’s cheaper than the hardware cloth)

polycarbonate roof panel

wood panels for ‘enclosed’ part (I just used scrap materials and cut down/patched together as needed)

hardware: L brackets to reinforce corners of the door, hinges, latch, self-driving screws and rubber-backed washers for roof panel

paint, paintbrush

Since I had a lot of these materials (chicken wire, plywood, paint) already, I only needed to buy the boards (~ $3/ea.), wire (about $25 for an entire roll which is enough for 2 of these coops), roof panel (~$15), and hardware (~$5-10). Basically I spent about $50 for a very nice portable coop. Even if you had to buy everything new it would still come in under $100 which is pretty good.

Part 3: Build

I decided to buy 2x4′s instead of 2x2′s for a couple reasons. If you’re buying wood from Home Depot, my experience has been that it is easier to get straight 2x4′s than 2x2′s. I got 10′ length pieces because the 8′ ones are actually more like 7.5′ and that would mean wasting a lot more wood. Also 2x2′s are just more expensive--it’s about the same per linear foot as the 2x4′s, just half as much wood. Since this is a pretty rough project and I had access to a table saw, I planned on ripping the 2x4′s--that was an additional step though and you could just buy 2x2′s.

After ripping the boards, I figured out how many pieces of each length I needed, cutting longest ones first and working my way down. I basically built a box and then a square for the base of the lid. I’m not going to spell that out because I made the wrong calculations initially and don’t have the correct ones written down. Measure twice... cut twice. Anyway.

The frame came together fairly easily although it is very helpful to have a second set of hands or clamps to help make sure things are square. However, you can do it alone!

Once I had the basic frame assembled I took it outside and painted it, then tacked on wire, then added all the wooden sides. I do the wire FIRST so that if there are rough edges where it meets the wood, the wood covers it up and you’re less likely to get cut on the wire. Also it looks neater.

I was painting as I went so after the wood pieces were installed I painted them, then put the hinges on the roof frame and connected it to the main frame. Finally I screwed on the roof panel to the roof frame using self-driving screws and the rubber-backed washers I had leftover from building the greenhouse.

Now that I’ve made one, I think the next one will go fairly quickly. I will probably make at least one or two more for additional rabbit housing. My goal with rabbits is to have a trio of breeding rabbits and do about 2-3 litters per year, per doe. I have some space in the greenhouse for rabbits, but it’ll get too hot during the summer months.

Part 4: Follow up/ Design Notes

Escape! I butchered the quail really soon after finishing the coop--because they kept escaping! The entire roof is one section and I thought it wouldn’t be too much of an issue to just open it a little bit, reach in, and change out food/water. I was wrong. Within a couple days I had lost 3 out of 5 quail, so I decided to cut my losses and butcher the last two--quite frankly it was a pain in the neck to try to get them fresh food and water, and I didn’t want to lose them all. I don’t think I’ll have the same issue with rabbits, but two possible solutions would be:

splitting the roof into two sections (so that part of it could stay closed while opening the other for access)

adding a small access hatch on one of the vertical sides just for changing food/water

Warmth - it’s just wire on the bottom, and plywood is not particularly insulating, so I stuffed the whole box part with straw for insulation.

Portability - I will probably add small wheels on the back if I start moving this in the garden beds at all as the back really drags (cutting into the ground) without any wheels.

#rabbit #quail

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