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worstloki · 4 years

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I’ve never seen any of the marvel movies, but my sister really likes them and is obsessed with Loki. She asked me to follow you, so I did, because I want to be able to connect with her. I have no clue what you’re talking about most of the time, but I want to thank you for bringing me and my sister closer.

aww that's a sweet and hopefully you two will remain close. Since you’ve never seen marvel movies here’s some quick summaries on what happens around Loki:

Thor 1: Loki, who is belittled, made fun of, and ignored on a regular basis, finds out he is a frost giant, which are basically monsters that his brother has been trying to kill since he was a child. Instead of explaining anything to him his adoptive father tells him he was adopted as a political tool since he would technically be the prince of the frost giants and then promptly decides to go to sleep. His mother tells him to prove his worth as a member of the family and dumps the throne of 9 planets on him while she is on bedside duty. Loki thinks his brother is going to kill him and also there is a war against the frost giants under way so Loki sends a huge metal man to deal with some people who did treason and also keep his brother away for a bit. Loki also kills the king of the frost giants in order to prove his loyalty lies with his adoptive family. Then Thor shows up and yells at him for trying to kill all the frost giants because he’s a hypocrite and they fight. Thor then places his hammer on Loki’s chest as if it doesn't restrict breathing. Oh, and Odin shows up and denies Loki’s attempt to become worthy so Loki throws himself into space because he’d rather commit suicide than have to live with life the way it is.

Avengers 1: so you know how he threw himself into space with the hope to end his miserable worthless little life? yeah, about that, he lived and got stuck with the option of being tortured some more or attacking earth. oh no, wait, it wasn't an option because the mind stone was involved. so he was forced to attack earth and act like he was homicidal and crazy to make sure no one realised that he was still doing his best to minimise damages and ensure he could be stopped. Thor shows up at some point and grabs his neck before slamming him into a mountain onto his already injured back. Loki makes it very obvious that he doesn't want to be here and isn't actually trying to win the fight but thor, his alleged brother, misses every memo loki waves in his face. Loki gets smashed into a concrete floor by the hulk, a giant rage monster made of 8000% muscle mass, before Thor gags him and takes him to Asgard to be punished for ‘attacking thor’s planet’ and ‘targeting thor’s love interest’ and ‘being jealous’.

Thor 2: Ha! Did you think Asgard has a decent system of justice? Jokes on you! The judge and the jury and the defendant and the prosecutor are all Odin! And you’d think ‘hey so he’s his father right so surely he loves his son a bit and would notice something is up, right?’ well, you’re wrong. Loki gets sentenced to solitary for life, which is 4000 more years by the way, and he’s told his birthright was to die and that the only reason he isn't being executed is because his mother didn't want him dead. 1 year later and its blatantly obvious that his only visitor, his mother, only wanted him alive because she wanted to manipulate him back into the loving family they’ve got going. He snaps and yells at her. The next time he hears about her its from a guard telling him she died and he wasn't invited to the funeral. Thor shows up for the first time in a year and doesn't answer Loki’s question about whether his mother suffered. Thor valiantly offers Loki the option to stay in a cell and eventually die or join him on a mission and die in the process. Loki accepts because he’s still suicidal and grieving and still cares about Thor and Asgard even if that's not reciprocated. So Loki turns up to help and Thor handcuffs him before making fun of the fact that he doesn't like falling because its an experience he could associate will falling into space and getting tortured. Loki saves Thor and his lady friend’s lives before getting impaled on a sword and dying. Thor’s last words to him were ‘i’ll tell father what you did today’ as if Loki’s character arc hasn't been about him trying to prove no one has ownership over him. Thor ditches Loki where he fell and died and since he never returns for the body he doesn't see Loki get up and go back to Asgard and take the throne from Odin.

Thor 3: Loki got Asgard to stop totalitarian-controlling the other realms. He’s been working towards solving racism and focusing the military society on the arts instead. Thor shows up and threatens to smash his head to death. Thor then places his hammer on Loki’s chest as if it doesn't restrict breathing, and then demands to know where Odin is. Loki spends half an hour falling through a portal definitely not panicking or anything because he was falling again but anyways the good news is odin dies in front of them the bad news is thor blames loki for it. Loki spends two weeks trying to stay away from the hedonistic touchy weirdo called The Grandmaster, then Thor shows up and causes trouble and now Loki has to either find Thor or die. Loki gets to fight a legendary warrior but she slams her hand into his face and he starts losing and gets knocked out and then wakes up in her room in chains. Thor turns up and throws a cup at his head and when Loki is volunteering to help them someone smashes a glass on the wall next to him. They fight their way to their destination and Loki tries to save Thor from death and ultimately killing himself but Thor electrocutes Loki and leaves him on the ground convulsing after giving a speech about ‘being more’ than who he is and about how he can ‘do better’ and its basically the worst thought out propaganda campaign ever and no one should put Thor in charge of inspirational speeches ever. Loki turns up to save the citizens of Asgard anyways and then Thor decides Loki should take on a suicide mission. Loki saves the day again and manages to come out alive and gets rewarded by being so graciously given the honour of being allowed to stand by Thor’s side as long as he returns to the abusive family relationship they’ve got going for them.

- Infinity War: you know how loki was tortured before avengers 1? yeah so the guy uses loki’s love for thor against him and then loki ‘sacrifices’ himself but really that was just an excuse to have the guy kill loki.

- Endgame: Time travel so we’re back to Avengers 1 after Loki was defeated. The sceptre’s influence on him is finally gone its very very visible that he has changed in the last ten minutes and Thor muzzles Loki. At least he gets away instead of getting taken to Asgard in this timeline.

#listen #i tried to stick to only listing things that were plot relevant #but basically loki really goes through it #its wonderful you're getting along with your sister though!#I hope you continue enjoying my blog :)#You're welcome

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rowdyholtzy · 7 years

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Since coming across this post, I’ve been wanting to watch Jennifer’s Body, so I thought I’d do so while writing a Tumblr recap post because... well honestly it’s just fun. And I’ll be watching it as a representation of being a closeted lesbian...

I’m only 3 minutes in and I would already read the shit out of this book if it were a book and I were my 15-year old self. Basically Amanda Seyfried is in prison and talking about how she gets fanmail from creepers, and fanatics who say she’ll be fixed if she just accepts Jesus into her heart but no one’s saved her yet. That’s honestly a pretty accurate description of the response the word “lesbian” gets - either fetishization or criminalization/expectation of “repentance”.

She ends up in solitary and flashbacks to life “before the killings began” - she, her bf, and Jennifer were all bffs and “normal” high school students.

“People found it hard to believe that a babe like Jennifer would associate with a a dork like me” - I know this is a horror movie, but Ow My Heart...

As Cheerleader Jennifer waves to glasses-wearing Anita sitting in the bleachers, the girl sitting behind Anita teases her for being all “LesbiGay” and Anita’s all “What? She’s my best friend!” Mmhmm Sure...

But also, I appreciate showing this because when two girls are close like that they can get teased and that puts them on the defensive possibly before they can even sort out their own feelings. It like forces them to prove themselves as straight girls/just bffs before they even know if that’s accurate...

Anyway, Jennifer invites Anita to a concert and Anita (being the shy nerd because Glasses! and Half-Ponytail!) is hesitant but agrees. Jennifer gives Anita the hungriest look I’ve ever seen one woman give another outside of The L Word:

and says “wear something cute”. Anita then watches Jennifer walk away.

GIRL

I know this is a horror movie, but I secretly want this to be the first scene in an adorable lesbian romcom.

Cut to Anita getting dressed for the concert and her boyfriend feeling insecure about her showing some above-jean-tum. They start making out but then Anita senses Jennifer’s presence. That’s some next-level lesbian ESP and I’m so here for it.

Jennifer gives Anita’s bf serious stinkeye. They head to a divebar to see this band because Jennifer is stalking the lead singer. Setting your sights on the most unattainable dude you can find and dragging your bff along for no reason (after telling her to wear something cute) is pretty gay... #JustSayin’

Bert-Macklin-FBI shows up and seems to be Jennifer’s boyfriend. So far Jennifer’s given no one else the hungry looks she gives Anita. She briefly drools over the lead singer and drags Anita over so she can introduce herself all giggly and baby-voiced. She’s serving serious FuckMe eyes though to be honest it’s hard to tell what’s genuine and what’s her performance so she can get what she wants. Also, is this all an elaborate plan to make Anita so jealous she finally makes a move? That’s the gayest possibility...

Jennifer goes to get them drinks and Anita wanders off to play pinball. She overhears the singer talking to his buddy about how Anita is definitely a virgin because “girls like that like to show it off but not give it up” and I’m thinking they’ve got demon-possession on their mind and of course Anita is all “how dare you talk about my best friend like that”

Anita tells Jennifer about the creepy/sexist conversation, and Jennifer rolls her eyes all “in no way am I a virgin”. Anita wants to leave but Jennifer is still googly-eyed over the lead singer, and the band starts playing. Jennifer slides her hand into Anita’s and grins the purest grin. Anita smiles too but after watching Jennifer stare at the singer, Anita’s smile falters and she pulls her hand away. Girl, you so JealousGay rn...

Suddenly a fire starts devouring the bar and the lead singer stops and smirks... wtf? Jennifer is still staring trance-like at him, so Anita grabs her and runs out. Jennifer is still in a trance, and the singer suddenly appears all “hey let’s go somewhere safer”. Anita’s all WTF DUDE? but he gives Jennifer something to drink and practically pours it down her throat. Jennifer agrees to go to the singer’s van, and Anita watches helplessly as she climbs in. She rushes home and calls her bf freaking out. Understandable so - she just saw a bunch of people burn alive and then her best friend got kidnapped. Her doorbell rings but no one is there. THEN she hangs up with her boyfriend. When she senses someone else in the house she doesn’t call her boyfriend again (or anyone else) she just slowly walks around the house. Smart move.

Anyway, she turns around to see Jennifer dead-eyed and covered in blood. Instead of answering Anita’s questions, Jennifer just stares, and grins to show a bloody mouth. Then she walks over to the fridge and starts devouring a chicken before puking up a lot of something dark that looks like blood but briefly moves on its own. Anita runs away but Jennifer catches her. Jennifer goes to bite her neck but seems to be stopped by Anita’s necklace (it’s one of those BFFheart ones). She runs off, leaving Anita sobbing. Cut to science class, where school gossip about the concert is flying around and Anita is flashbacking to a playground scene where Jennifer gets stabbed by a nail but asks Anita not to tell her mom so she won’t get a shot. Anita says “I never tell on you”

Cut back to science class, where Jennifer walks up to Anita and teases her like normal. Anita’s all WTF? Jennifer is serving serious MeanGirl, not giving a fuck about (and mocking) the people that died at the bar and basically calling Anita a weirdo who overreacts.

Cut to BabyVoice!Jennifer fake-sympathizing with a FootballDude grieving over his best friend who died in the fire. She brings him into the woods and while they makeout all the woodland creatures come out to watch. Pretty soon she unhinges her jaw and her teeth go all sharp and yeah he’s a goner. Jennifer goes for a swim in the lake, while one of the teachers finds FootballDude’s disemboweled body in the forest.

Between both tragedies, everyone’s mourning and dressed in black. Except Jennifer who’s literally wearing heart earrings and strutting like a supermodel down the school hall. A month later, it’s announced that Low Shoulder (the band that was playing at the bar and kidnapped Jennifer) will donate 3% of sales from one song to families affected by the fire. Anita’s like “that’s bullshit because what about the other 97%” but everyone’s like “NO THEY ARE HEROES”. Jennifer is noticeably grouchy, and pale, with bags under her eyes and chapped lips. I’m guessing she’s hungry. Anita’s asks if she’s PMSing and she responds with this doozy: “PMS isn’t real. It was invented by the boy-run media to make us seem crazy”

(While hormonal fluctuations during our cycle obviously are real) I APPRECIATE YOUR POINT GURL YAS.

A seemingly-friendly goth dude asks Jennifer out and Jennifer has the look every lesbian has when a guy asks her out:

Until Anita says “I think he’s nice” and Jennifer gives her serious hungry eyes before accepting GothDude’s invitation.

GothDude pulls up to what he thinks is Jennifer’s house but turns out to be a creepy-ass house with plastic sheets everywhere and ravens flying through it.

Meanwhile, Anita and her bf are having sex at his place.

Back at NotJennifer’sHouse, she’s seducing GothDude before attacking him.

Mid-sex, Anita is having hallucinations of blood dripping from the ceiling and the dead footballer with Jennifer. She freaks out and goes home. She crawls into bed and screams when she realizes Jennifer is there. She yells at her to get out but Jennifer is all “we always share your bed when we have slumber parties”

Jennifer makes out with her and things start to get steamy and not to get all deep about a makeout scene but it’s noticeably different from when Jennifer is seducing a guy. With guys, she talks a lot and always stays in control. Her movements are forceful and aggressive. With Anita, she stops talking as soon as they start kissing. She doesn’t even manipulate Anita’s body. She kisses her, then lies back on Anita’s bed so Anita can climb on top of her. To me, this indicates that her intentions are not necessarily to feed on Anita like it was with all the boys. And she just fed, so It seems more like she wants to celebrate with Anita than to feed on her.

Eventually (though also too soon) Anita jumps off Jennifer and is like “WTF YOU’RE A MURDERER”. Minus the murdery part, I feel like this is a pretty common experience for queer girls: crossing a line with the best friend you have a crush on and she freaks out and sees you as a monster...

Jennifer’s all “BFFs don’t keep secrets so remember that night that evil band kidnapped me?” and flashback to her being in the van and seeing books on satanism all over the floor. They drive her deep into the forest and she tries to run but they tie her up and take her to the giant waterfall that ends nowhere (which by the way is the the big landmark of the town). She begs them to let her go and the lead singer mansplains how hard it is to be an indie band these days because there are just so many and it’s impossible to stand out, so “Satan is our only hope”.

He stabs her repeatedly, and throws the knife into the waterfall.

Cut back to Jennifer and Anita in her bedroom and Anita’s all “IDK what happened after that I just came to and found my way to you”. My feels are so confused because there’s OwMyHeart but also EwSheEatsPeople and I realize this is probably how fans of Twilight feel about Edward, except Jennifer is actually Anita’s best friend instead of a creepy pedo-stalker.

Anywho, apparently when Jennifer’s full she’s invincible. She stabs herself and it heals up like nothing happened. Anita’s like “OMG... wait what do you mean by full?” As she pieces things together, she orders Jennifer to leave. Jennifer begs her to stay and literally says “we can play boyfriend/girlfriend like we used to”

But Anita is having none of it. She orders Jennifer to leave again, and tears start to fill up Jennifer’s eyes as she jumps out Anita’s second story window and disappears.

Anita does Dark!Forbidden! research and apparently if a virgin sacrifice is not a virgin than the demon resides in the non-virgin. They’re weakest when they’re hungry and a blade through the heart will kill it. She tells all this to her boyfriend as her reasoning for not wanting to go to the school dance (being afraid that the dance will be like a buffet for Jennifer). Yeah girl, that’s much better than just making up an excuse why you don’t want to go. Tell your boyfriend you’re convinced your best friend is possessed by a boy-eating demon.

He responds all “maybe you should see a shrink” because well obviously.

Cut to everyone getting ready for the big dance. In an interesting genderswap kind of scene, Anita’s bf’s mom gives him pepper spray because “there’s a sicko out there who likes boys”. Because I read too deeply into everything, I’m going to take this as a feminist commentary on how more energy is spent “teaching” women how to protect themselves than actually catching and detaining predators.

Jennifer is brushing her hair at home and clumps are coming off in her hands. Cut to Anita at the dance, not seeing her boyfriend or Jennifer.

That’s because Jennifer stopped Anita’s bf on his way to the dance. You think she’s gonna go all demon-face on him but instead she tells him that Anita slept with FootballDude. Then she kisses him and they’re just making out no demon-face.

Back at the dance, Low Shoulder is playing. Anita suddenly touches her lips because her LesbianESP senses are tingling because Jennifer’s making out with her boyfriend. She runs to... I’m not sure where? Following her LESP senses like a bloodhound I guess...

Jennifer brought Anita’s bf to a deserted pool. When he refuses to kiss her again, she pushes him into the pool and attempts to drown him. Hearing him scream, Anita runs into the poolhouse in her big pink poofy princess dance dress and she’s climbing through the thick vines that have grown all over and it feels very Princess Saving Her Prince From The Monster and I fully approve.

(You didn’t think I’d get through this entire post without a Kate gif, did you?)

Jennifer has just started to go all fang-y on the bf, and Anita dives in and fights Jennifer. They have a super catty wit-off before the bf rams a pole through Jennifer’s stomach and even after she pulls it out the wound keeps bleeding. Jennifer jumps out the window, and the bf collapses because apparently Jennifer did get to bite him before Anita saved him. He dies as Anita sobs.

Cut to Jennifer lying on her bed, using the yearbook as a menu. So the pole wound did eventually heal I guess? Anita crashes through the window and jumps on top of her, holding up a box cutter. Jennifer calls her butch for getting her murder weapon at Home Depot. They struggle, and Anita rips off Jennifer’s BestFriend necklace. That seems to stun Jennifer, and Anita plunges the box cutter into Jennifer’s heart. Jennifer’s mom comes in to see Anita sitting on top of her. Instead of running away, Anita rolls off of Jennifer’s body and lies next to it on the bed, exhausted (it kind of has a post-sex vibe instead of post-murder). Jennifer’s mom sobs. Not to make everything gay but this scene feels representative of the pretty-common gay experience of having a parent walk in on you and the shocked sadness they respond with...

Cut to Anita in prison, explaining how if you get scratched by a demon (she reveals a large scratch on her shoulder) you might absorb some of its abilities. Camera pans out to show her floating up to the small window in her solitary cell. She kicks it open and walks right through the iron fence. Walking through the woods, she notices a stream that seems to be where the endless waterfall empties out, and the knife used to stab Jennifer lying at the bottom. She picks it up and hops in the car that picks her up hitchhiking. She tells the driver she’s following a rock band and “tonight’s going to be their last show”.

Cut to a collage of clips of the band exiting their limo to screaming fans and signing autographs. They’re partying in their massive hotel room until the doorbell rings and then the music changes and there are bloody handprints. Then body bags and crime scene photos. The knife is still in the body of the lead singer. Hotel security footage shows Anita walking away from the hotel room as she looks up at the camera.

Overall, I liked it. It’s entertaining and made me laugh out loud a few times (which is very rare for a movie). The screenwriter and the director are both women and it passes the Bechdel test. And it really works as thinly veiled representation of being a closeted lesbian in high school. I really appreciated the pre-possession scenes because they showed that Jennifer’s sexual/romantic interest in Anita was NOT the demon.

It felt like the demon was just a bloodthirsty carnivore but Jennifer loved Anita so much that she never wanted to hurt her (which is why when she’s starving and has Anita up against a wall she sees Anita’s necklace and runs away instead of biting her). And later when she realizes that feeding makes her basically immortal she climbs into Anita’s bed and then makes out with her. Like this realization of her new immortality gives her the courage to do what she felt like she couldn’t before. And in the final fight scene when Anita rips off Jennifer’s necklace? Jennifer is stunned. She doesn’t move. She lets herself fall back onto the bed and doesn’t defend herself. In that moment it feels like she just loses the will to go on, like she lets Anita stab her.

And there really are so many parallels between Jennifer’s experiences and common closeted teen lesbian experiences: the jealousy of your best friend’s boyfriend, making a move on your friend and maybe she goes along for a few seconds before aggressively rejecting you and seeing you as a monster, being assaulted by men (the sacrificial scene is very reminiscent of gang-rape, and assault is tragically a universal experience for women in general regardless of sexual orientation), having a parent walk in on you and your romantic partner and be shocked/angry/heartbroken... there’s a lot here that translates to representation of the the gay-teen experience. And I respect the filmmakers for that.

#jennifer's body #recap #i overanalyze everything #everything is gay #movie night

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