#fatt is not perfect but.

[boo-cool-robot]

Please enjoy the Friends at the Table cast (and Kat “KB” Brewster) playing Family Feud and reluctantly realizing that they have to give the obvious answer to “Name something you’d like your partner to do to your face.”

[Source here. This was a stream for the National Network of Abortion Funds!]

Transcript under cut:

DRE: Uh, Jack.   Back to you.  

JACK, laughing: Yes. [Long pause.] What is one thing..I think I would like to go for uh...uh.. [Long pause.] Can I get feed please, Dre?

ALI bursts into laughter.

AUSTIN: Feed!

KB [crosstalk]: Feed!

JANINE [crosstalk]: Feed!

AUSTIN: Feed?

DRE: Yeah, a little airplane comin’ in, okay!

AUSTIN [crosstalk]: Good.

AUSTIN, JANINE, and KB laugh.

DRE: Let’s see if it’s on the board, fly in the airplane and feed their face...

[Buzzer sounds]

DRE: Aw, no.

AUSTIN, JANINE, and KB [crosstalk]: Aw, no.

JACK, indignant: Nobody...But the face is where you’re fed!

DRE [crosstalk]: I agree, give me some Caligulan grapes.

JACK [crosstalk]: [Inaudible] ...The little airplane!

JANINE: I think we...Let’s also...[Huffs.] Family Feud is a game that presents itself as very PG, and it isn’t. It just isn’t.

AUSTIN chuckles.

KB [crosstalk]: Mmmhmm, yeah.

JACK [crosstalk]: Yeah.

JANINE, laughing: Uh, so...maybe we should think about that.

DRE [crosstalk]: Mmm hmm, yeah!

DRE: Alright, Austin.

KB: On to you, buddy.

DRE: Last chance.

AUSTIN: This is our last chance?

JANINE and KB: Yeah.

JACK laughs.  

JANINE: Mmm hmm.

DRE: Two strikes.

AUSTIN [crosstalk]: Uh. Okay.

JACK [crosstalk]: Some money. It’s for charity.

AUSTIN: I think--

DRE giggles.

AUSTIN: I think a lot of folks would say... [Pause.]

KB [crosstalk]: You gotta say it for charity.  

AUSTIN, laughing, voice breaking: That they would like their partner to sit on their face.

SYLVI: Goddamnit!

[Several people yelling]

AUSTIN: Sit on ‘em. Sex it. Sex it!

KB [crosstalk]: Good answer, good answer.

DRE: On the board, show me...sit on it!

[Bell dings]

Austin, yelling: Let’s go!

[Several yells of triumph]

ALI giggles.

Janine: Yep.

#friends at the table #fatt #f@tt #austin walker #andrew lee swan #jack de quidt #the whole cast really but they're the main characters of this video #I am unblievably excited we will get another family feud stream #dre is the perfect host #jack [indignanty] : the little airplane! #a podcast about sadness and that's it period

[rozecrest]

can’t stop thinking about the divine principality trying to turn the twilight mirage from a garden into a lawn

#a good metaphor for empire in general…. working to craft the perfect citizen (tightly regulated homogenous grass) and eliminate the rest 🫠 #nideo masking their settler colonialism with ecological themed rhetoric makes me crazy oh my god #AND THE MUNDANE MAGIC OF EMPIRE LIKE AN OIL SPILL. great fatt season for biologists sad about nature #palisade #chats #and the divine principality twisting and crushing good things to suit them like 😵‍💫😵‍💫 ITS NOT A FIELD ITS A GARDEN

[ernestinapickman]

Me when a story is tightly plotted, well-paced, and objectively good with a satisfying conclusion: nice.

Me when a story is SO good but also SO bad and wildly entertaining and sprawling and incomplete and inconsistently written with high highs and low lows and glaring plot holes and deep flaws but also it’s obvious that the writer or writers is/are having so much fun with it:

#truly a perfect concoction to make me insane #yes this is about Jojo’s but also hxh and fatt and fe3h and a million other things #stella out

[swallowtailed]

literally crying with laughter at this fucking. public assembly about the cult

#letting this team loose to just Be A Community with all the fucking havoc that entails was a perfect choice #fatt #hello world #‘i don’t believe in meetings’ absolutely ended me #also mustard red admitting it’s a cult…. #the statistics getting reinterpreted repeatedly… #palisade #fatt lb

[peacereturnedtothevalley]

while sangfielle was airing I was hyperfixating on ffxiv instead so in honor of me catching up on it now, here's the full party:

pre-sapodilla

🛡️ Pickman: Gunbreaker 🔫

🛡️ Bucho: Paladin🛡️🗡️

🏥/⚔️ Lyke: White mage/Black mage 🧚‍♂️🧙‍♂️

🏥 Marn: Sage 💉💉💉💉 (maxed all crafting jobs🪚)

⚔️ Duvall - Summoner 🐞

🛡️/⚔️ Chine - Warrior/Dragoon 🪓👺

⚔️ Virtue - Reaper 👻

⚔️ Es - Black Mage 🧙‍♀️

post-sapodilla

🛡️ Pickman: Gunbreaker 🔫

🛡️ Bucho: Paladin🛡️🗡️

🏥/⚔️ Lyke: White mage/Black mage 🧚‍♂️🧙‍♂️

🏥 Marn: Sage 💉💉💉💉 (maxed all crafting jobs🪚)

⚔️ Duvall - Summoner 🐞

🛡️/⚔️ Chine - Warrior/Dragoon 🪓👺

⚔️ Es - Black Mage 🧙‍♀️

🏥 Hazard - Astrologian🔮

Virtue:

#i could not think of a good one for chine but i did just realize they have a poleaxe #so warrior's axe and its beast within power #and dragoon for the pole and also sometimes an estinien transformation situation happens so #virtue took me a second but with the reaper avatar as darling i think its perfect #lyke feels right to me. red mage is too mobile for him i feel #taking suggestions also if you have other ideas sound off in the comments- #fatt #friends at the table #sangfielle #Youtube

[r0ryy]

i'm a long haired Cass truther

#r0ryy art #fatt #friends at the table #cassmako #cassander timaeus berenice #mako trig #counter/weight #the need to draw cass' perfect prince hair overwhelmed me and i blacked out #woke up 20 hours later and these existed #they make me so fucking powerful #im declairing the 2023 cassmako renaissance

[planet4546b]

happy september first can we all listen to bright morning cool evening together <3

#pers #listened to fall of magic the first time around this time of year and it was so perfect for it.... #and we had a beautiful cool morning here today......can we all listen to bright morning cool evening togther #music #fatt #Bandcamp

[arohawke]

i finally got around to clipping my favorite part of the storeroom saga

transcript by robotchangeling on transcripts at the table

AUSTIN: Fero, now comes the most amazing part.

KEITH: Mmhmm.

AUSTIN: I need you to roll 2d6 again. This is an occurrence. And in the book, there’s a list of occurrences, so, just give me a…

KEITH: [sarcastic] Oh wow, I can’t—I’m sure that a lot of them are good news!

AUSTIN: Uh huh, can’t wait!

KEITH: Roll 2d6, and we’re gonna get one of the ones that are good news. Six! 

AUSTIN: So what’s—it’s a four and a two.

KEITH: Oh, are there two occurrences?

AUSTIN: [laughs] Oh my god! No, there’s a table, and then there’s a—there’s a table—

DRE: Oh, great. Good

AUSTIN: There’s a table—

SYLVIA: Oh my god.

AUSTIN: There’s a table? And then there’s a list, there’s like six things on the table. And what you got is four, two. [reading, laughing] “Domesticated animals have broken into the storeroom and made a mess of the food supply. All but 1d3 of the food is destroyed.” Which is, honestly, so on point with what we did this turn.

KEITH: Yeah. Yeah, it really is.

AUSTIN: You built a [laughing] subterranean menagerie that was connected to this storeroom by a tunnel. [all laugh]

SYLVIA: I wonder why that went wrong?

AUSTIN: [laughs] It’s really funny! It’s—

SYLVIA: Oh my god.

KEITH (as Fero): Guys, I’m sorry, I swear to god I was—the next thing I was gonna do was a gate! [laughter] Like, I had the wood to do the gate, like right there!

AUSTIN: Oh, no.

SYLVIA: Everybody’s just like “Ohh, a gate…”

AUSTIN: Well, Keith, I need you to roll—Fero, I need you to roll 1d3. Please roll a three, for your own sake.

KEITH: No, wait, don’t I want to roll a one?

AUSTIN: No, it’s all but 1d3. [laughs]

KEITH: Ohh.

AUSTIN: Which is, you know what? That makes it good that you didn’t get a lot of food this turn, ‘cause that would have been really disappointing. Imagine if you all had done the 4d6—

KEITH: One.

AUSTIN: Okay, well you got one? Good. Great. You have one food.

KEITH: What is up with these rolls?

AUSTIN: [laughs] It’s bad, it’s bad! It’s not good!

KEITH: This is a joke that I wasn’t here for, but [DRE: Oh, yeah] I can assume, a lot of the context here. Throndir says, “Who forgets to build a gate? That’s like breaking the storeroom on the first turn, then not fixing it for three years!”

DRE: So we broke the storeroom on the first turn, with our occurrence—

KEITH: Yeah, how long did it take you to fix it?

DRE: About three years. [Keith laughs]

#friends at the table #fatt #f@tt #spring in hieron #seasons of hieron #thanks to amdis for reminding me with their first listen that i meant to upload this #everything about this one gets me #how absolutely perfect the occurrence is for what fero did #the one keith rolled on that d3 #sylvia going 'oooh a gaaate' #keith and dre's exchange at the end #just 10/10 no notes #fattposting

[guccigarantine]

Important question do we think it’s Layer Luxurious or Lair Luxurious

#road to palisade #both are good but I’m partial to Lair #they’re the podcast host Perfect Imperfect #it’s such a good fake out #fatt

[mothbug]

really wanting to get your friends into fatt but also really believing that autumn is the best season to start with is the first ever paradox for girls

#yes the sound quality is bad YES it’s their first and therefore their least polished/perfect season. start with it though. #fatt #shaking my friends shoulders. this show turned me into a communist in 8th grade. its only getting better from there

[kennabeth]

noelle is an amazing follow bc she posts like an unemployed friend at 2pm on a tuesday but she's actually working her ass off and the juxtaposition is funny 2 me

#also bc shes smart and beautiful and sometimes she posts videos of her talking and you get to just listen to her perfect voice #says kenna #fatt posting

[swallowtailed]

listened to a bit more of twilight mirage session zero while fighting with rstudio and… these characters… i love them…

#elect of dead divine. person named fourteen fifteen. and a catgirl #literally perfect no notes #fatt #hello world #twilight mirage #fatt lb

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Round 2

Propaganda

Pickman (Friends at the Table: Sangfielle):

She's a middle aged knight who is also a cowboy if the dragons/horses were evil and/or haunted and/or cursed trains! She went to (evil?) heaven and hated it BUT she was beloved by all the queer artsy women around. When she was a kid she got kidnapped by a train and lived on it for like 15 years before getting out and joining the people who kill trains. She has zero social skills, zero patience, zero charm, but she's SO hot and gruff and no nonsense and she Looms to be supportive

massive goat woman wearing armor made from the bones of a sentient train. kinda person to run a mcdonalds like it's the navy. went to heaven and said "fuck this, actually," invented pointillism and introduced evil fucked up trains to heaven and left. butch icon love of my life

SHE’S A GIANT BUTCH GOAT LADY WHO WEARS KNIGHT ARMOR MADE OF TRAIN PARTS AND HUNTS TRAINS THE WAY KNIGHTS HUNT DRAGONS. SHE’S ALSO A COWBOY. AND HAS A BIG GUN. SHE SPEAKS IN SENTENCES 10 WORDS LONG OR FEWER AND ROLLS HER OWN CIGARETTES.

She's butch, she's a knight, she has a big gun, she once convinced a skeleton to give her his sword

you used multiple fatt examples in your intro, so I assume you already Know

massive butch goat woman with a gun

HOT EMOTIONALLY DISTANT BUTCH GOAT TRAIN-KNIGHT

she's a goat! she's tall! she has a gun but doesn't know what a ranged weapon is! she's so autistic! AND she won my sexiest friends at the table player character tournament, she absolutely deserves to win this one too!!

Pickman is a big butch goat woman who smokes and fights supernatural trains. Self-explanatory

Have you seen her.

Giant butch goat knight who kills trains. The perfect woman.

She s so sexy shes a goat lesbian.please.

ITS PICKMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

she's a gruff muscular goat woman who hunts trains and wears train armor, she's perfect butch husband/wife material

“Ah, that sexy trains podcast character” “You mean that sexy trans podcast character?” “🐐no🚂”

VOTE PICKMAN OR I'LL HUNT YOU FOR SPORT

GO MY PSYONIC WARRIORS... PICKMAN SWEEP!!!!!!!!

I cannot believe my friends in the past have not found pickman attractive but please reconsider guys

Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

#Propaganda for Glenn Close: one of the other PCs mentions multiple times how hot he is #Actually several characters point it out but especially Henry #Also the only person in a podcast that has to put a disclaimer about not being a BDSM podcast to have had sex during the course of the show

PLEASASSWEEPLEASE TOU DONT HUNRERFSTABDS

GLENN GLENN GLENN ITS GLENN VOTE GLENN VOTE FOR THE BOY

#Round 2 #Pickman #Ernestina Pickman #Glenn Close #Friends at the Table #Sangfielle #Dungeons & Daddies #Dungeons and Daddies

[scarletstatic]

15 Days of FatT Day 10- Masks

Masks was a perfect excuse to draw Diego Rose!

#15daysoffatt2023 #15daysoffatt #friends at the table #sssketches #counterweight #counter/weight #fatt #diego rose #the boy!!! #I miss him and the odamas fleet

[dancy-nrew]

Did a little fatt zine exchange with some friends! The prompt was "Reunions", so I made mine about Hadrian and Hella, best of friends, coming together after time apart. Posting today on the 8th anniversary of AiH 00!

Script/image description:

WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO WALK THROUGH THE DOOR

(Text on yellow painted background)

(In a chunky, painterly style Hadrian is setting dishes on a table. Rosana’s hand is coming in from offscreen right to rest on his arm. It looks warm in the house.)

Rosana: It’s already set.

Hadrian: Yeah, sorry.

(A close up of Hadrian’s face on a yellow background. His hair is all gray now. He looks pensive.)

Hadrian: It’s been so long…

Hadrian: I want to make sure it all…

(Hadrian and Rosana kiss by the table. They are painted in such a way that they are mostly shapes and have no facial features.)

Rosana: Oh my love, everything is perfect.

Rosana: And I can’t imagine she’d care if it wasn’t.

(Close up on Rosana’s warmly smiling face on a yellow background.)

Rosana: It’s Hella!

Hadrian: Rosy-

Rosana: Hadrian. Go answer the door.

(A view of Hadrian from behind. He is standing in front of the door. He is using a cane. Through the window you can see it is night outside.

(A shot of Hadrian looking apprehensive above a close up of his face, joyfully smiling)

(A panel of painterly yellow)

WALKING THROUGH THE DARK TOWARDS A PERSON YOU KNOW

(Pale yellow text on a chunky, painterly image of plant life in the night. There are scribbly spheres of the same color as the text floating around.)

(Hella and Adaire are walking down a tree line path through the night, with floating lights above their heads. Hella is wearing a red and charcoal striped dress, and Adaire is wearing a blue dress with lighter blue splotches. We see the, from behind. Their faces have no details. This panel is styled after the Edouard Vuillard painting “Two Girls Walking”.)

Adaire: Stop fussing!

Hella: Ha, sorry.

(Close up of Hella in front of the plants and lights. She is smiling in an apprehensive way.)

Hella: I’m Just nervous. It’s been awhile.

(A full view of the women. Hella is trying to move her arms up but Adaire has hold of her elbows and is kissing the side of her face. Hella is smiling and laughing.)

Adaire: My, my, Queen Killer, going soft in your old age.

Hella: Hey! Ha ha ha!

Adaire: You have nothing to worry about-

(Close up of Adaire, smiling sarcastically.)

Adaire: It’s Hadrian.

Hella: Adaire!

Adaire: Hella. Go knock on the door.

(Hella stands in the dark in front of a door, an arm raised to knock. Warm light is spilling through the window.)

(A shot of Hella looking apprehensive above a close up of her joyfully smiling, lit up by the light from inside.)

(A panel of the nighttime trees and floating lights)

#fatt #friends at the table #hella varal #hadrian #hieron #my stuff