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#he attempts to contain it because he learned on his journey with arthur to value human life
usuccc · 2 years
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I’m here.
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meraenthusiast · 4 years
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Chop Wood Carry Water Summary: 9 Success Principles
Chop Wood Carry Water Summary
I’m always in search for a good self-improvement book. Lord knows I need all the help I can get!
Most of the time I get new book ideas from authors that I’ve already read before.
If I like them then I usually pull the trigger and purchase their recommendations.
Even better is when someone walks up and hands me a book that they think I’d enjoy based on their knowledge of my interests.
This was the case recently while sitting in church. One of our Life Group members handed me a copy of Joshua Medcalf’s book, Chop Wood Carry Water.
The title piqued my curiosity but I have to admit, I didn’t think the book would resonate with me. Now, I didn’t tell the person that passed it along to me (Holly), so I decided to read it (and glad that I did).
Do you want to become great at your profession? At real estate investing? Becoming a better parent got you confused?
No worries. This book’s got you covered with 9 success principles.
Enjoy!
Chop Wood Carry Water Summary – 9 Success Principles
#1 It’s important what you become in the process
For all of the work that you do (treating patients, working a job, family projects) in the end you’re ultimately working ON yourself and for yourself.
It’s for that reason that you should love what you do no matter what you’re doing throughout the day.
This helps with dealing with the different outcomes that life throws us.
Outcomes are either:
Controllable
Uncontrollable
For instance, let’s say that you recently applied for a new job that happens to be in the best hospital in the country. You know that if you got the job then your career path would be set for life.
Look at what’s controllable in this situation. You have your qualifications and letters of recommendations that could be written on your behalf but you also have to take into account those things that you can’t control.
These uncontrollable things would be the competition (their unique qualifications) and possibly who they know that may work at the hospital.
So what can you do?
Surrender the outcome.
This means being at peace at what is OUTSIDE of your control without having to sacrifice the efforts for what is INSIDE of your control.
So what do you control?
You control the:
Process
How to get there
The way to get there
What do you NOT control? 
The pure outcome.
Bottom line. Focus on the PROCESS and one thing at a time. You’ll be much happier if you do.
#2 Success contains hard work
Principle #2 in the Chop Wood Carry Water summary is one that is missed the most these days (especially by the younger generation).
This principle was brought to my attention when recently watching the documentary The Last Dance. It was filmed during the Chicago Bulls 1997-98 season as they went for their 6th NBA title in eight seasons.
It highlighted the star of the team, Michael Jordan. During the time that they were winning championships, I was attending high school and college.
Looking back, I never figured someone like MJ had to work hard to be as good as he was.
I thought he was just a great basketball player.
The documentary proved me wrong. He was a grinder that focused on the little things to make both him and his players better.
He demanded success.
His teammates actually feared him. I love that guy!
Most people don’t get what they want in life because they settle for average. It’s the small things done with persistence in life that makes success.
Small choices you make can add up to a BIG effect over time. Speaking of adding up, let’s look at compound interest.
Compound interest
Compound interest is nothing more than interest on interest. We have taught our kids that focusing and being persistent with the small things is what brings about healthy habits.
We had this discussion at lunch the other day regarding the money they’re making this summer. I told them that I understand that they’re not making much, but it’s the saving, spending and giving habits I want them to get.
With regards to savings, they realize that getting into the habit of saving a portion of every dollar they earn will lead to a MUCH larger amount thanks to compound interest.
Example
Here’s an example that I showed them in the past from the Ben and Arthur story that Dave Ramsey told during one of his conferences.
Ben started out investing $2,000 a year from age 19 and stopped at 26. Arthur started at age 27 but continued until age 65.
Ben’s total investment = $16,000
Arthur’s total investment = $78,000
source: DaveRamsey.com
Once they reached age 65:
Ben accumulated $2,288,996
Arthur accumulated $1,532,166 (not bad for a janitor)
Ben came out $756,830 ahead!
It was the small, consistent hard work performed early in life that allowed Ben to accomplish what he did.
#3 Our value is constant
When you’re on a winning team, it’s easy to feel good about yourself. But when you’re on the losing team, it’s just as easy to feel down and depressed.
Our value doesn’t change regarding the results produced in life. Don’t tie yourself too close to your performance.
Instead, find your identity in something that can’t be easily taken away.
#4 The pain of regret is far worse than the pain of discipline
Principle #4 in the Chop Wood Carry Water summary has to do with pain and regret.
Jim Rohn once said, “We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons.”
Let��s face it. We all deal with and face pain both mentally and physically on a monthly basis.
I started feeling the affects of years of playing sports and treating patients once I turned 40.
I miss those pain-free mornings getting out of bed but that’s just part of life. 🙁
Once we accept that pain is unavoidable, then we shouldn’t hide in fear from it. It’s a natural part of life.
Unfortunately, there’s people that aren’t willing to accept this fact and attempt to avoid pain no matter the cost.
By doing this, they constantly focus on the negative and forget to enjoy and appreciate the joys of life.
Now that we know that pain is unavoidable, we then get to choose between the pain of discipline or the pain of regret.
The pain of discipline is felt every day. That’s why it only weighs ounces.
It’s the discipline to sprint while everyone else is jogging.
It’s the discipline to track your workouts before hitting the gym.
It’s the discipline to avoid the cake while trying to lose weight.
But each individual moment weighs very little, but added up overtime they weigh tons. That ton of pain can begin to form into regret.
For example:
You regret not knowing what you’re capable of.
You regret not chasing your dreams.
You regret stopping short of your potential.
It’s this pain of regret that becomes a heavy weight that unfortunately you carry around your entire life.
On the other hand, the pain of discipline is a series of small pains that  quickly disappear.
#5 Your memories are created through the stories you tell yourself
Whenever we experience something, our brains will either label them positive or negative.
We have little control over many things in life but we do have control over what those things mean to us.
Our words and stories determine the stories that life creates for us.
Those pictures affect our feelings and what we do with them. By doing this, we set ourselves up for either failure or success.
#6 Comparison is the thief of all joy
Too many of us today live our lives trying to keep up with everyone else (the Joneses!).
Many times social media paints an unrealistic picture of what’s really going on in society.
There’s always someone out there that’s going to be smarter, stronger or richer than yourself.
Constant comparison does nothing but suck all of the joy out of life.
Instead, focus on life’s journey and be thankful for all things in life, no matter how big or small.
#7 Live by principles rather than feelings
Principle #7 in the Chop Wood Carry Water summary has to do with the way you live…whether that be by principles or feelings.
If you live your life by feelings, then you must know that feelings change. You can feel happy or sad within the blink of an eye.
Living by principles is different. Whereas feelings change, principles stay the same.
Examples include:
Think Big…such as in the book, The Magic of Thinking Big
Set Goals
Work Hard
#8 The map you’re given by society is outdated
It seems as if most people today follow the map given by society but there’s one problem. That map is OUTDATED.
Maps don’t change with the times. Instead of using them, find successful people to mentor you in whatever field you’re interested in.
For instance, when I wanted to learn more about real estate investing, I searched for and located a local mentor with tons of experience.
He explained that the way he invested twenty years ago is MUCH different than how is approaches it now.
You must learn to change and adapt to the times or get left behind.
#9 You still need permission even when you are equipped with life changing wisdom
Even when you have knowledge that can benefit others, there’s no point in trying to “force” it on others.
Especially when they’re not ready to listen.
It reminds me of the quote, “When the student is ready, the teacher appears.”
Would you tell someone how to lose weight if they didn’t think they needed to? Probably not.
But once they’re ready to commit to eating better and exercising then you can share your knowledge with them.
Bottom Line
Chop Wood Carry Water is one of those types of books that can be easily read in a few hours but the impact can be life changing.
Let’s face it. We’ve all been through tough times and will continue to do so while we’re here on Earth. There’s no way around it.
But you have a choice. You can allow life to win and stay beaten down or get up, brush off your clothes, learn from your failures/mistakes and keep moving forward.
This book gives you the tools needed to keep you working towards your goals despite setbacks.
The main takeaway I got out of the book was this:
“Success lies in doing simple things over a long period of time. If you learn to chop wood, carry water then success will eventually come.”
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bharatiyamedia-blog · 5 years
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Vijay Mallya watches India vs Australia Cricket World Cup match at The Oval in London
http://tinyurl.com/y45bo47z London: Embattled liquor tycoon Vijay Mallya on Sunday joined a whole bunch of cricket followers for the India versus Australia ICC Cricket World Cup match at The Oval in London. “I’m right here to look at the sport,” he mentioned, as he walked into the stadium together with his ticket. The 63-year-old former Kingfisher Airways boss, an avid cricket fan, is needed in India on fraud and cash laundering expenses amounting to an alleged Rs 9,000 crores. File picture of Vijay Mallya. Reuters His most up-to-date Twitter intervention was additionally cricket-related, as he showered reward on a brand new Indian restaurant and sports activities bar known as Ooty Station in central London, which opened on Friday. “Was invited for a preview. Very good throughout Sports activities Bar. Loved one of the best South Indian Meals and an unique cocktail checklist watching thrilling cricket. The one place to be in London to take pleasure in a premium Sports activities Bar and award successful meals,” learn the tweet by Mallya, who stays on bail as he contests an extradition order issued by a UK courtroom final 12 months. He has continued to make a sequence of interventions on social media to supply “100 per cent payback” to state-owned Indian banks to cowl his now-defunct Kingfisher Airways’ debt. After the Westminster Magistrates’ Courtroom extradition order was signed off by UK dwelling secretary Sajid Javid in February, Mallya had lodged an attraction within the UK Excessive Courtroom which has already been rejected on paper by a decide and is scheduled for an oral listening to on 2 July. The so-called “renewal utility” seeks go away to attraction within the Excessive Courtroom towards Choose Emma Arbuthnot’s ruling in favour of extradition in December 2018. It is going to contain a brief listening to earlier than a Excessive Courtroom decide, the place his legal professionals will additional plead his case towards being extradited to India. It is going to mark one of many ultimate phases of the appeals course of within the UK because the probabilities of permission to attraction to the Supreme Courtroom are unlikely if permission to attraction is denied on the Excessive Courtroom stage. Mallya would have the choice to method the European Courtroom of Human Rights (ECHR) primarily based in Strasbourg, France, to argue towards his extradition to India on human rights grounds by attempting to show an actual risk of hurt or torture. In the meantime, the businessman’s bail on an extradition warrant executed by Scotland Yard in April 2017 includes a bail bond value 650,000 kilos and different restrictions on his journey. On the finish of a year-long extradition trial at Westminster Magistrates’ Courtroom in London final December, Choose Arbuthnot had discovered “clear proof of dispersal and misapplication of the mortgage funds” and accepted a prima facie case of fraud and a conspiracy to launder cash towards Mallya, as introduced by the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) on behalf of the Indian authorities. The courtroom had additionally dismissed any bars to extradition on the grounds of the jail situations underneath which the businessman can be held, because the decide accepted the Indian authorities’s assurances that he would obtain all essential medical care at Barrack 12 in Mumbai’s Arthur Street Jail. Your information to the newest cricket World Cup tales, evaluation, studies, opinions, reside updates and scores on https://www.firstpost.com/firstcricket/series/icc-cricket-world-cup-2019.html. Comply with us on Twitter and Instagram or like our Facebook web page for updates all through the continued occasion in England and Wales. !function(f,b,e,v,n,t,s) {if(f.fbq)return;n=f.fbq=function() {n.callMethod? n.callMethod.apply(n,arguments):n.queue.push(arguments)} ; if(!f._fbq)f._fbq=n;n.push=n;n.loaded=!0;n.version='2.0'; n.queue=[];t=b.createElement(e);t.async=!0; t.src=v;s=b.getElementsByTagName(e)[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(t,s)}(window,document,'script', 'https://connect.facebook.net/en_US/fbevents.js'); fbq('init', '259288058299626'); fbq('track', 'PageView'); (function(d, s, id) { var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; if (d.getElementById(id)) return; js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; js.src = "http://connect.facebook.net/en_GB/all.js#xfbml=1&version=v2.9&appId=1117108234997285"; fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs); }(document, 'script', 'facebook-jssdk')); window.fbAsyncInit = function () { FB.init({appId: '1117108234997285', version: 2.4, xfbml: true}); // *** here is my code *** if (typeof facebookInit == 'function') { facebookInit(); } }; (function () { var e = document.createElement('script'); e.src = document.location.protocol + '//connect.facebook.net/en_US/all.js'; e.async = true; document.getElementById('fb-root').appendChild(e); }()); function facebookInit() { console.log('Found FB: Loading comments.'); FB.XFBML.parse(); } Source link
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merlinficreview · 7 years
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The Student Prince: Chapter 1-5 Review!
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Sorry it’s been 84 years since Romeo or I have posted anything. Romeo is back to school for the semester so her time is limited and work has been really draining on me recently. Never fear, we are still here though and I’ve got a review!
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The Student Prince by FayJay
Word Count: 145222
Ok guys, this is it. The infamous Student Prince fic. I have read this one before and I liked it because it seems to be the closest fic I’ve found to a modernized version of the BBC show. Plus, as I’ve already said before, I am a sucker for Modern Royalty AUs. This fic also takes place at the University of St. Andrews, which I know nothing about. So google will be my trusty friend throughout this review.
Here we go!
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Chapter 1
We begin with Merlin getting hit in the face with some luggage and falling onto some poor elderly lady. Merlin has to maintain an extra sense of control when objects are flying towards his face because he has magic and doesn’t want to out himself. Yay Modern Day Magic Fic!
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So it turns out the luggage situation was someone else’s fault. “She glanced from Merlin to the lady and then back again, her face the picture of mortification, and Merlin – who had been feeling a little disgruntled about the whole unexpected-rain-of-luggage scenario – took one look at her huge brown eyes and immediately wanted to reassure her that he had thoroughly enjoyed being knocked half unconscious.” Haha, aww.
The luggage canon introduces herself as Gwen. Yay, Gwen! She is studying engineering at St. Andrews. I think it’s weird that Gwen already has all her textbooks. Have they already signed up for their classes? How would she know what to buy?
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Gwen tells Merlin she also has a hammer in her bag. "’Of course there is,’ nodded Merlin, gravely. ‘Who travels without a hammer in their luggage these days? One never knows when a spot of joinery might be in order.’ The corner of his mouth twitched. ‘Stop!’ he said, raising one hand in front of him. Gwen blinked, and after a beat Merlin added: ‘Hammer Time! Dooo doodoodoo! Doodoo! Doo! Hammer Time!’ as he improvised a quick, and truly terrible, attempt at the Hammer Dance in the cramped confines of the aisle.’”
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Oh my God. How embarrassing. Stop it, Merlin. Then Gwen tells Merlin that she makes her own jewelry and Merlin is super impressed. Merlin even does the dance a second time and I want to crawl in a hole and die from secondhand embarrassment. Merlin, you JUST met Gwen. Calm yourself.
“’Hey, it's not really Merlin, is it?’ Gwen asked, looking at him sidelong. ‘I mean – really really? You're pulling my leg, right? I mean – nobody's called Merlin. Why would any woman name her baby after an old man with a long white beard and a pointy hat? It's like calling your baby Gandalf.’” This is the second time Gwen has awkwardly expressed disbelief about Merlin’s name. Stop being weirdly obsessed with his name, Gwen. How fucking rude. Poor Merlin. Getting assaulted by luggage and then getting his name made fun of. Good start to college, Merlin. Good start.
Then Gwen points out that Prince Arthur is also going to be attending St. Andrews and she says Merlin and Arthur will become besties. Merlin points out that her name is Guinevere and that she’ll be future queen.
"’That isn't why I applied there,’ she insisted. ‘I mean, I know that there must be thousands of girls who filled in their UCAS forms with St Andrews just because they're living some kind of stupid “Princess Diaries” fantasy and they think they're going to meet him and he'll fall for them and they'll end up with a tiara and a load of corgis, but I'm serious about my career. St Andrews has an excellent engineering department. I was going to apply there long before I heard that's where Arthur was going.’”
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But that’s not the plot of The Princess Diaries at all?
I also have the St. Andrews website pulled up because like I said, I know nothing about it, or going to school in the UK, to be honest, and it doesn’t even look like St. Andrews has an engineering department. Man, Gwen is going to be pissed when she finds out she spent all her money on textbooks for a degree her school doesn’t offer.
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Then Gwen tells us how King Uther met his wife while they were at Oxford once upon a time. "It's such a beautiful story, isn't it? The way they met at Oxford when she borrowed his jar of Gold Blend, not even realising he was the Prince of Wales at first because he was in the middle of shaving and she was distracted by her friend's dog...oh, they were so in love!" Gold Blend is coffee, by the way. I had to google it too. In what situation would a man be shaving his face next to a container of instant coffee while a random dog is nearby? That’s such an odd scene to imagine. Maybe she knocked in his door to borrow the coffee and she had the dog with her? Were there co-ed dormitories back then?
Merlin is just as suspicious about this story as I am and pops Gwen’s bubble, telling her it was most likely PR. I agree.
"Merlin shook his head mutely, and carefully didn't mention any of the books or magazines he might possibly have read about Prince Arthur and his family. Especially not the outrageously hot photoshoot in GQ magazine that he'd been hiding under his bed for the past three months, and frantically jerking off to most nights. Nope, definitely not mentioning that. Gwen rolled her eyes. ‘Uther and Igraine – it's like a modern day Romeo and Juliet!’" First of all, 100% do not mention that to Gwen. Good decision. Second of all, Gwen has a really hard time grasping plots, doesn’t she? No wonder she decided to major in a non-existent department at her university. She’s not a very bright girl.
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We then learn that Merlin is planning to major in physics. That is a department at St. Andrews, good job, Merlin! Then Gwen compares their journey to Hogwarts. “He found himself wishing he could explain about Professor Gaius and Doctor Nimueh, and about the kind of text books he had stuffed into the bottom of his rucksack – but that wasn't going to happen. Magic was secret, and secret it should stay. Nobody wanted to go back to the days of witchburnings.” Poor Merlin. It’s always so sad that he has to hide himself. I will also give him a pass for already having magic books because that’s different.
Gwen and Merlin talk a little more about Harry Potter and then go right back to talking about Arthur and how they’ll probably never meet him. Well…
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Then Merlin gets real depressing real fast. "Whatever. All those posh interbred types with more rooms than they know what to do with and flocks of sheep wandering around on their enormous ancient estates - that's who he'll be hanging out with. Not with a physics student from a grotty little council estate in Cardiff, or an engineering student – however lovely – who lives above her dad's garage in Wembley. Face it – we don't have our own flocks of sheep." Brutal Honesty Hour! It’s my favorite time of day!
Merlin then shares some chocolate with Gwen and they enjoy the rest of their train ride.
Chapter 2
“The door was open a crack when Merlin reached his room in St Salvator's Hall, and he could hear voices inside, and what sounded rather a lot like The Rolling Stones.” I looked up St. Salvator’s Hall and holy crap those rooms are nice. According to the photos, the rooms are like twice as big as the dorm rooms of the university I went to. I also decided to compare prices, for funsies, and also to sit and cry about how much more ridiculously expensive it is to go to university here than in other countries. The fee for a shared room at St. Salvator’s Hall is £5,837 which includes a meal plan. That’s 6292.55 USD for comparison. At the University that I went to, a shared room with communal bath is 6,795 USD. This does not include a meal plan which could add up to around 800 USD if you pick the one with the most meals. Those rates are also per semester and not for the entire academic year. Now, St. Salvator’s rate does not state whether the fee is per semester or for the whole year but either way, it’s still way more expensive here in the US. It also looks like St. Salvator Hall doesn’t have communal bathrooms like the one located here that I looked up. Yay not affordable education here in the US!
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Anyways, Merlin enters the room and his roommate is none other than the Prince of Wales himself, Arthur. Oh my god. I NEVER saw that one coming!
“’Only – I thought – well, I pretty much assumed that you'd be staying over at New Hall. Where they have single rooms. And ensuites with all the mod cons,’ blurted Merlin. ‘Not sharing a room in Sally's. Why are you sharing a room in Sally's?’ Arthur frowned. ‘Because I lost a bet, if you must know. With my father.’ He stared at Merlin, looking puzzled and a touch irritated. ‘You weren't expecting this, then? They didn't get you to sign things – Official Secrets Act, all that?’” I think that’s a fair question Merlin is asking and I also want to know what sort of bet Arthur lost. How fucking awkward that no one alerted Merlin to who his roommate was supposed to be. Don’t they give out roommate names before the semester starts?
So then Arthur gets bitchy that Merlin hasn’t signed a non-disclosure agreement. “Well – sorry if this sounds, you know, rude, but basically if you touch any of my stuff, or take photos of me or my friends, or tape conversations, or sell your story to the press, or – basically, if you act like a dick, right? Well, we're talking Tower of London, pretty much. That's the Cliff Notes version.”
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Calm the fuck down, Arthur. Throwing Merlin in the tower for borrowing your history book is way too excessive. So then Merlin asks if he can make a citizen’s arrest if Arthur does any the aforementioned things to Merlin. Good job, Merlin. Arthur is a complete asshole about that, acting like Merlin’s stuff is grosser than the stuff on the bottom on Arthur’s shoes and tells Merlin he will replace anything he ruins with something of “equal value.” "’Like a stick of gum,’ murmured Kay, sniggering.” Yeah, be prepared to really really fucking hate Kay in this. "’I can see why you have to swear people to secrecy, if this is how you act when you're not around a reporter,’ blurted out Merlin, feeling cheated. ‘You really are a massive prat, aren't you? A smug, self-entitled, patronising git.’” Yassssss. You tell him, Merlin.
Arthur and his friends leave and then Merlin goes to find Gaius. We learn a little about the School of Sorcery. This School can be found in every single building on campus, one just has to find the special door with a dragon on it. Merlin finds the door located in his residence hall. Of course the dragon on the door talks to Merlin, "’Young Merlin!’ it said, in a voice like a rusty gate, blinking sulphurous eyes impossibly as it writhed through the wood like an eel in water. ‘Back so soon?’ ‘What?’ Merlin stared at it. ‘I haven't – this is my first time here, Master Dragon.’” So we get a little hint of reincarnation.
Merlin finds Gaius who tries to shoo him away until Merlin gives him his name. Gaius changes his tune after that and tells Merlin he knew his father. The first thing Merlin does is complain about sharing a room with Prince Arthur. He says it will make it too hard to hide his magic. “Gaius blinked at him owlishly. ‘Then I suggest that you learn some discretion, young man, and quickly,’ he said.’” That is such an annoying adult thing to say. What a non-answer. Poor Merlin. Gaius tells Merlin he is supposed to be rooming with Arthur so he can protect him and that wizards have always protected kings and queens. Merlin is unhappy with this news.
Chapter 3
This chapter opens with:
“Hey, Gwen – how's McIntosh Hall?
Brilliant! How's Sallies?
View good, mattress soft, roommate total plonker. Yours?
She seems OK. Sorry you got plonker. Want to meet later & go to Union together?
God, yes please!” It’s written just like that (italics represent direct quotes and bold represents italics within the fic. You know the drill). I assume they are texting.
Anyways: “It was the tail-end of summer, but apparently that meant something rather different on the East coast of Scotland than it did in Wales, and by the time Merlin got to Gwen's Hall of Residence he was wishing he'd brought a coat, rather than just pulling on a black v-neck jumper.” Does Merlin not know how to read a map, or?
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Like… I know the UK is small compared to the US but he can’t really be that surprised that the Northern part of the UK is colder than the Southern part. There’s almost 500 miles in between Cardiff and St. Andrews. I’m glad Merlin isn’t majoring in geography.
So Merlin meets up with Gwen outside her residence hall where she has acquired a gentleman caller. It’s probably Lance. Merlin and Gwen hug. “’Hey, you,’ he said into her hair, feeling something in his chest tighten unexpectedly. ‘I missed you.’”
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Calm down, Merlin. You’ve known her for thirty seconds and only been away for her for three of those.
Lance is not happy with Merlin’s presence. “’Hi, Lance,’ he said, ducking his head in Lance's general direction. Lance smiled back – or at least, he bared his teeth, which was almost the same thing. Merlin had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. ‘Hi,’ said Lance reaching out a hand that Merlin rather suspected was going to be bone-crushing. He let go of Gwen and accepted the handshake, and managed not to buckle under the pressure of Lance's Very Manly Indeed deathgrip of macho posturing.” LOL HOW HILARIOUS. Men treating women like objects and prizes to be won. Real knee slapper, that joke.
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Gwen tells Merlin that Lance is going to be her Academic Dad and then informs us that there’s only 8 weeks until Raisin Weekend. Thanks, Exposition Gwen! So I also googled this Academic Family business since that’s not a thing we have here. So, basically an Academic Mum and Academic Dad are like mentors for first year students and freshmen are allowed to ask for someone to be their Academic Mother but the Academic Dad has to do the asking to the freshmen. So it makes no sense that Gwen was so shocked about Lance asking her. Whatever. Raisin Weekend is basically just an excuse to drink excessively with your Academic Parents and dress up in costumes that Monday and have shaving cream fights. Typical college nonsense.
“’Well, if I'd known they were giving away hot blokes with every room, I'd definitely have put my name down for McIntosh Hall.’ Lance made a startled noise, and his territorial expression shifted rather quickly into something entirely different and almost maiden auntish as Gwen punched Merlin's arm.” Get it, because Gay Merlin is no longer a threat to Lance chasing after Gwen. No one tell Lance bisexual people exist. I think his head would explode. No, you know what? Someone should tell him. He’s an asshole.
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“Lance gave her a slightly sheepish grin. ‘It's okay,’ he said. ‘I'll be your designated driver – I'm not big on the alcohol.’ ‘I don't need a designated driver,’ said Gwen, looking at him sidelong. ‘It's a three minute walk! It would take longer to get a car started than it would to get there!’ ‘Right – well, designated guard dog, then. Or knight in shining armour, or guardian angel, or overprotective Dad – whatever you want to call it. I don't drink, so, you know – I'll make sure you're okay. Promise.’”
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Oh my God. Slow your fucking roll and let her do what she wants. She’s not some poor defenseless damsel in distress.
Lance gives off an extreme sense of superiority in this fic. He’s a Buddhist, doesn’t drink, volunteers all over the fucking place as Professional Knight in Shining armor and he’s vegan. “’My Dad disapproves of the veganism,’ he admitted, sheepishly. ‘But it's not so hard, really. It feels good, knowing who I am, and what I want out of life. Being mindful in all things.’” Be more pretentious, Lance. Really, I want to see if you can top all of that.
“Merlin studied Lance, trying not to be too damned obvious about it. He wasn't at all sure if this guy was for real, or if he was playing some kind of elaborate joke, with all this holier-than-thou schtick. There was a disconcerting intensity to the man. Merlin wanted to like him, but he wasn't at all sure what to make of him. He did seem a bit too good to be true.” See, Merlin knows.
Oh and Lance is going to teach Gwen kickboxing. He has classes on Wednesday. Of course he does. Merlin is not into it, especially after meeting one of Lance’s students, Elaine. “Merlin looked at her biceps and swallowed. ‘Yeah – no thanks,’ he said, with a watery grin. ‘I've got a suspicion she'd crush me like a bug.’” Mostly I just included this because I wanted to talk about the phrase, “watery grin.” I see this ALL THE TIME in fanfic and it drives me crazy. What the fuck is a “watery grin?” If your smile is “watery,” swallow your fucking spit. That’s disgusting.
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“Gwen bit her lip and glanced up at them. ‘Would you hate me forever if I left you for five minutes?’ she asked. ‘I need the ladies' room. I know I should have gone before we left, but I was caught up talking, and I didn't get around to it. Can you wait for me?’ ‘Until the stars fall from the sky,’ said Lance, bowing with an elaborate flourish that made Gwen roll her eyes.”
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I don’t even have a response to this bullshit.
So Gwen goes to the bathroom and Merlin does his, “hurt her and I’ll kill you,” speech to Lance and afterwards they become friends and Lance offers to be Merlin’s Academic Dad.
When Gwen comes back she is absolutely flipping her shit because she saw Arthur. “’ComeOnComeOnComeOnComeOn!’ she said in a singsong voice. ‘You should see him! He's sitting at a table! Drinking a beer!’” Yes, let’s all go and gawk at him like an animal in the zoo. Gwen and Lance are being really annoying so far.
So Merlin tells Gwen that Arthur is his roommate and that he’s an asshole. He then requests that they not go stare at him like total creepers. Gwen is not happy. “He looked at Gwen and sighed. ‘Look, I promise that you'll get to see him again. In fact I'll text you when he's in the room, so you'll know when's a good time to swing by and visit me in Sally's and meet him properly. I'm sure he'd love to pose for a photo with you, and give you his signature, and all that kind of meet'n'greet thing.’” Ok, Merlin. This shit is why Arthur already doesn’t like you. No inviting people over to stalk your roommate and make promises on his behalf. Stop it.
They all go dance and Merlin makes a fool of himself doing the hammer dance, covered in glitter, wearing DIY hammer dance pants (I don’t know) that he got from… somewhere. Arthur stares at him and Merlin falls off the stage.
Chapter 4
Merlin wonders how many other sorcerers are at St. Andrews and we learn that he is there on scholarship. Must be nice. My poor loan debt ass is going to be paying for the two years I spent in nursing school for like ten years. Cheers.
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Merlin hears Gwen laughing, “He spotted her over on the other side of the room, in front of a table advertising the St Andrews Fencing Society.” Gwen? Fencing? I mean, I guess. Why not? She’ll have a lot of time on her hands when she realizes the major she’s chosen doesn’t exist at that school. Gwen is with her roommate, Sophia.
“With that thought in mind, he marched purposefully over to the rainbow-festooned table advertising the St Andrews LGBT Society in cheery glittering letters. ‘Sign me up,’ he said, firmly, grinning at a bald girl with enough silver in her various cavities to sink a small ship. ‘I'm a card-carrying friend of Dorothy, and I'm gagging for a shag.’” What a colorful way to introduce yourself, Merlin.
Merlin stops in the middle of registering for his LGBT club to fantasize about Arthur. As you do.  “’Oh, marvellous,’ said a faintly familiar voice behind him, rippling with laughter. ‘Oh, that's just perfect. Does Arthur know yet?’” The person is Morgana, “’Er...?’ he said, trying to think where he knew her from. ‘Sorry, are you talking to me?’ ‘He doesn't, does he? There'd have been even more bitching and whining if he did,’ she said, decisively. ‘Oh, this is going to be good.’” Get it? Because Arthur’s homophobia is such a hilarious joke and it’s going to be SO LAUGHABLE when he finds out his roommate is gay.
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Merlin goes out for coffee with Morgana, who I do like in this fic minus her laughing at Merlin’s sexual orientation in the previous scene. Morgana asks Merlin if he is in to Arthur. “He's an insufferable, rude, arrogant, overprivileged berk, and I wouldn't suck his cock if he was the last man on earth and he was paying me, so there!” Me thinks the man doth protest too much.
“Fine. We won't talk about how much you want to get into my cousin's royal boxer shorts. So – magic!” Morgana gives no fucks. I like that about her. Merlin freaks out because you can’t just go talking about magic all willy nilly like that. Merlin insists on calling magic “macramé,” but Morgana is having none of it. They decided that their cover story for being so familiar with one another is that they have played World of Warcraft for years and are finally meeting in person. Sure. We also learn that Morgana is studying Art History. Good job, Morgana. That is also a subject that St. Andrews provides.
“’Now then – word on the street is that you might actually be worthy of that remarkable name.’ She took a long, thoughtful drag, and Merlin watched blue curls of smoke snake out of her nostrils like she was some kind of very small, elegant dragon. ‘Is it true that you changed the seasons?’ she asked. ‘No!’ Merlin said. ‘Or at least – well, not on purpose.’” Yikes, Merlin. I guess Merlin was 10 and throwing a tantrum about cherries not being in season so he changed the season from winter to summer. He also summoned a kracken when he was 12 years old on a school field trip. Poor Hunith having to deal with Merlin. He sounds like an insufferable child.
They then proceed to get drunk and Morgana becomes Merlin’s Academic Mother thingy. Merlin gets Morgana to be Gwen’s as well.
Chapter 5
Merlin gets back to his dorm and Arthur is there. Arthur apologizes to Merlin and suggests they start over. Arthur then realizes that Merlin is drunk. Merlin drunkenly tells Arthur that he is friends with Morgana and they were drinking together and that she is now Merlin’s Academic Mother. Turns out she is also Arthur’s. Who didn’t see that one coming? Arthur admits that he looked Merlin up and knows a lot of stuff about him. Merlin says stuff he shouldn’t say, basically admitting he is a sorcerer and he finds Arthur hot and Arthur doesn’t pick up on any of it. Arthur is stupid.
Merlin starts to fall asleep on the floor and Arthur can’t have that, for platonic friend reasons, and so he gets Merlin into bed and decides to help him drink water and take some pain killers. ���There was an uncertain space of time, and then Merlin was being manhandled upright by someone warm and shirtless, who smelled good. Merlin knew he smelled good because he was slumped bonelessly with his nose pressed into the hollow of a freshly-washed collarbone. Because it seemed like a good idea, he licked it, and made a small appreciative sound, and then tried a gentle bite. The owner of the collarbone gave a startled hiss, and flinched away, but didn't drop him; and the voice, when it came again, was decidedly hoarse.”
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See, Arthur is fucking stupid. If a friend/someone I wasn’t into randomly bit and licked my chest, drunk or not, I would be like, “yo, that’s not cool.” Because that’s not something someone does with their platonic friend.
When Merlin wakes up, “Another thought wandered idly through his brain, and he was faintly aware that it was significant: he wasn't alone. He was, in fact, wrapped around somebody else in the manner of an affectionate baby octopus, one leg tangled between theirs, one arm hooked firmly around a neat naked waist and his mouth pressed damply into the warm, soft-sharp curve of a shoulder blade.” Arthur is awake too, “Do you have any idea of how much fun and frivolity I could have been having last night, while you were busy cutting off the circulation in my limbs? I'll have you know I was going to have a fantastic evening.”
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Umm… you made the choice to stay behind and spend the night cuddling your roommate, Arthur. You could have shoved him over if you wanted to.
Merlin and Arthur go get breakfast together. Merlin texts Gwen to tell her about Morgana being their Academic Mother and that she is also Arthur’s. Gwen freaks the fuck out.
That’s it for this review. It’s a decent set-up to the fic. We get to know a little bit about Merlin and how powerful he is. We also have a rough start to the Arthur/Merlin friendship but then it’s nice to see Arthur actually own up to his shit and apologize to Merlin. Arthur is stupid for not realizing how into him Merlin is. Gwen and Lance have been pretty annoying so far and if I remember correctly, they continue to be insufferable for the majority of this fic because their “will they won’t they” cliché set-up is stupid.
Until next time
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