#he looked up one of her songs on yt to seem relatable，i told him ‘i don’t listen to t-swift’，and he screamed at me :((( | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

eyes-like-a-pisces · 4 years

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Rules: Answer 10 questions, tag 10 people and make another 10 questions.🧜‍♀️

Questions from my astrological twin: @maiden-song 💕

1. if you could choose to glimpse the afterlife, would you?

Yes, I would. I think a lot about It.

2. under what circumstances do you think you past life was lived?

I could have had many past lifes. I think I was a native american, cause I've always felt bonded to their tradicion and same with China, cause when I hear the sound of Erhu - traditional chinese instrument, something wakes up in me. I've also always wanted to see Sweden & Finland, so maybe I was doing something there... I mean, I could do anything. I see myself in biblical times, as well as middle ages. I could be a renaissance artist, as well as dying of hunger during victorian era, or something, and that's probably why I'm still careful with money, haha. For my latest one, I think I could have been a hippie in the 60/70s and had some drug use experience, cause when I was a child I used have dreams about taking drugs, even if I didn't know anything about It. I also had some experience with psychics (and "psychics"), my mom had a past life regression and she told me she saw me few times... I don't take anything for granded, but reincarnation is one of my favourite theories.

3. what three skills would you instantly master if you had the choice?

Playing every instrument, speaking every language, singing beautifully

4. would your rather no passion or no pain?

No pain. Everything is needed in life, but you know, enough is enough.

5. if you had a chance to leave this world and go to another one, would you take it?

Depends of the world and who I would meet there. Even if this world can be cruel and disappointing at times, I still have some love for him and humanity.

6. if you could smell like anything in the world, what would it be?

Like the first day of spring, when you go outside and the air smells different. Or a storm.

7. do you feel like common interests or philosophical comparability are not important?

They are very important. I can't imagine a relationship without similar interests, views. You either get bored or fight constantly. I think that the whole point of searching a partner is trying to find things you got in common. The more similar you are, the more understood you feel and more you are attracted to them. That's my experience at least. That's a very basic example, but as you may noticed, I'm very much into music and I was dating a guy, who wasn't into music that much at all. I thought It doesn't matter at first, but then I started feeling like I'm missing my favourite way to connect with other person. Once I met a guy who loved music as much as I do, I'm sorry to admit It, but my partner became unattractive to me.

Similar interests and views are needed at the beginning, to bond with somebody, and later, to simply enjoy spending time together (thanks Captain Obvious). I mean... chemistry and good will are not enough for a relationship to last. Don't get me wrong, I don't think you have to be identical and agree on everything - some differences can be inspiring, balance your relationship and teach you something new. It's also ok and even needed, to have some separate hobbies, things that you like to do on your own. There are also other important things, like, if you equally care about each other and if you are on the same page in general, but I can't imagine not agreeing in the key points and things that are the most important to you. And the only person who can decide what is the most important is the person who is in that relationship, no matter if It's about interests, philosophy or religion. But beside a romantic relationship, I think It's good to be surrounded by different people and listen what they got to say.

8. if there was one mystery you alone could learn the answer too, what would it be?

The mystery of life in general. Why we are here, is there any destiny, how we are connected, how this universe works, what happens after death...

9. in your opinion, is there anything more important than love?

No :) (I'm not talking about putting your relationship before other things. I'm talking about love as a big force and meaning of this universe)

10. describe a new planet you would live on, if you could.

I want things to be diverse, monumental... Maybe another moon, why not. As a concept of the world, I wish there would be peace :) everybody has their safe place to live, will to live, passion, purpose, someone to love and who loves them back. Amen.

Questions from @mybloodiedvalentine 💕👯

1. What is an unpopular opinion you hold you about which you feel strongly and with which you seem to notice a lot of people disagree?

Nothing specific comes to my mind at the moment (that I haven't mentioned before). I sure have some, but what's unpopular opinion in general and what's unpopular opinion on tumblr, are two different things. Maybe, that the "tumblr positivity" is not really helpful. Like: "in case you need to hear this: you are smart, you are loved... ". How do you know that? Those are just empty words. But It's better to spread positivity than negativity, of course.

2. What is the nicest thing a stranger has ever told you that you can recall?

Oh, I had a few situations like that... This is so lovely, when a stranger wants to just be genuinely nice, not just catcalling you...For example, when I was with my 3 girlfriends at the club and 2 ladies in their 40s where like: "excuse me, we just wanted to say that we can't stop starring at you all, cause you are the priettiest girls in the club." And we were like: aww, omg, you are beautiful too, come dance with us. And we were all dancing in our witches circle ignoring all sweaty men around us, haha. Or when my mom went to the the same hair saloon as me and asked hair dresser if she remembers me and she said that she does and that I'm nice and intelectual. I'm her faithful client now ;_; (Sorry for sucking my own dick, but It was nice to remind myself about these situations).

3. Has a piece of art or music ever made you cry? If so, do you remember a specific moment?

Crying to music is my passion. The latest intense moment was few days ago. I was loading a dishwasher at night and I played some music and then "lover you should've come over" by Jeff Buckley came on and sudden wave of lonelliness hit me so hard, that I just had to put down the plate, hide my face in my hands and weep ✌

4. What’s your favourite piece of clothing?

Idk, maybe my Penny Lane coat :)

5. What’s a random childhood memory that fills you with a deep sense of comforting nostalgia?

Sledding with kids during a very cold winter in my home town, until It got dark and snow looked like sprinkled with glitter and having my freezed feet warmed up with a hair dryer, when I came back home, haha.

6. What is/was your favourite thing about your mom? If not your mom, your dad? Or best friend?

My favourite thing about my mom is that she's tolerant and open minded. I didn't have to lie to her or pretend I'm someone I'm not because of that. My favourite thing about my dad is that he actually cared about being a parent, even tho my parents divorced. I respect that he has unwavering morals and huge knowledge about a world - biology, astronomy, music, art...- subject doesn't matter- but he is very modest about It.

7. What’s something you learned on your own of which you’re proud?

Playing guitar

8. When was a moment in your life you remember laughing the hardest?

I was playing cards since I was a kid. After few years, when I was about 13 y. o. I got the first poker, a royal flush. When I saw my cards, I'm not sure why, I just coudn't believe my luck, I started laughing so hard I almost died.

9. What do you like to do when you’re having a hard time mentally that invariably calms you down?

Really depends of the kind of situation and if It's triggered by something or just a longer period of time feeling in a certain way. The is no a magic trick, but some things might be helpful. When It's concrete situation, at first, when the feelings are really intense, then I just can't calm down. Every try to do so, has a reverse effect. Like, I CAN'T THE FUCK CALM DOWN and It makes me even more angry. Brain needs about 20 min to chill, if It's not triggered, so It's better to be left alone and just go mad a little until brain will have enough haha. Have a good cry, listen to some music, have a lonely walk, write my feelings down etc.

I like to listen to Teal Swan on youtube. She's a spiritual teacher. I know, It might not sound encouragingly, but she actually seems very down to earth. She has a video about like, every emotion and every problem ever. She's very good in naming feelings, rationalizing them and It makes you feel more understood. And It calms me down as result. ASMR doesn't work for me, but I remember that at some point I liked to listen to sounds of the nature, like rain, waves etc + guided meditation to fall asleep.

Music always helps in general - listening, playing guitar, singing. I also like to take an oil and do a face massage. I'm really sorry if I sound like an instagram influencer 🤢, but when you feel bad for a longer time, you frown and there is a tention in your jaw, it can be really relieving. I follow instructional videos on yt.

When I have a longer period of going into downward spiral, then every way to distract my brain is good - TV shows, internet content that is not related to my life situation (although, sometimes It's good to distance yourself from social media), for example, I like criminal podcasts, cause they are occupying enough to distract a miserable brain, meeting somebody, going to a place I've never been before. + any kind of shedule, reason to leave the house, any goal, anything positive to look forward to and having even the simplest things done, is a blessing (even if sometimes It's the last thing I wanna do). I also tend to be much sadder in the evening, so I just go to sleep. When nothing works, then It's time for the professional help.

10. Do you have a favourite holiday memory?

Discovering Cocteau Twins.

Best regards if u actually read all that chatter, but those questions were so interesting, that I couldn't limit myself to one sentence answer (in most cases).

My questions are:

1. Who or what was the most influential for your music taste?

2. If you could time travel, where and when would you like to go first?

3. If you could be someone from an opposite gender for a day, how would you like to look like and what would you do?

4. Do you have a style icon/inspiration? Or a favourite designer? Desribe your dream clothing style

5. What's the song by a band/artist from your country that you could recommend? (From your hometown or state eventually)

6. What is the most rebellious thing you've ever done?

7. Has ever something in your life happened, that you coudn't explain with logic?

8. What 5 objects someone could use to summon you?

9. What is your favourite name from your culture's language? And outside your culture's language?

10. What's a song you normally wouldn't admit you like or different from music that you usually listen, but still enjoy?

I tag: @winterdryad @bowiepop @nightmare @confusion-in-the-sea-of-sorrow @l0w-budget @numberoneblind @mirandasinclairs @mysticbride @leperwitch @comeacrossthedesertnoshoeson @hexafu @mielmelancolie @arcane-delight

#don't reblog this or any of my personal posts please #and thank you

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morganisboringg · 4 years

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Omegle friendship story ;-;

Stranger: m

You: hiya

You: f

Stranger: bonjour

You: hola

Stranger: im 18 bitchh

You: im 14 hoeee

Stranger: shidddd

Stranger: 😂😂

You: yeah im a childdd

Stranger: lmao

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: but im not a creepy guy so ur good 👌🏼

Stranger: hahaha

You: yeah ie had a 20 year old try to keep talking with me

You: and a 17 yr old ask if i have a nice ass XD ive delt with creepy guys XD

Stranger: hahaha dudes are horny

Stranger: used to be like that too but i realized its wrong

Stranger: so yeah just vibing rn

Stranger: 😤😤😤

You: yeah they are, i be vibin too im watching sky high B)

Stranger: lol

Stranger: im watching rick&morty

Stranger: im the ultimate virgin

You: lmaoooooo , i mean u have to also like game theory and film theory for that but ur close XD

Stranger: never heard of that

Stranger: 😂

You: theyre nerdy yt channels, they make theorys on games and films and shows and stuff

You: they have a bunch on rick and morty

Stranger: oh

Stranger: i watch some of those

Stranger: 😤😂

Stranger: im an ‘adult’ child

You: yeah i do too, i literally have their merch

Stranger: hahahaha

You: oh i hope to be an adult child bc gRosS adults

Stranger: yeah i dont wanna be an adult

You: me either, adults get stares when they only dress in hot topic clothes why would i want that

Stranger: hahahah yeah

Stranger: thats the reason i dont have a gf

Stranger: bc im too childish

You: well then u just havent found the right childish girl

Stranger: that is a fact

You: might i reccomend the single rider lines at like amusement parks XD

Stranger: hahaha why

You: ive seen plenty of dudes shoot there shot there bc the girls are by themselves then they get to ride a rollercoaster together

Stranger: hahah yeah thats fun

Stranger: maybe i wikk

Stranger: :)

You: yeah XD then if it works out a cute date at an amusement park!

Stranger: hahah yeah

Stranger: do u have a amusement park obsession

Stranger: lmaoo

You: uh- thats uniMPORTANTTT

Stranger: hahahhah

You: theres food and adreniline whats not to love!

Stranger: i love them too

Stranger: i once forced my cousin to ride the same coaster 12 times in a row

You: ive ridden king da ka the tallest rollercoaster in the world XD

Stranger: he puked after

You: lmaoooo sounds like smth id do

Stranger: hahaha

You: but then id just say again and go again XD

Stranger: hahahah same

Stranger: adter he threw up i went alone

Stranger: lmao

Stranger: dude i need some advice

You: sure

Stranger: my friends sister (shes 15) has a crush on me

Stranger: what do i do

You: oh shit uh- tell her shes too young

You: or like take her on a cute date but say its a friends date

You: thats a nice way to friend zone sm1

Stranger: yeah true

Stranger: its kinda weird

Stranger: my friend says he doesnt mind

Stranger: 😂

Stranger: but still wekrd

Stranger: weird

You: well thats uh getting to chris hansen levels so gotta shoot her down lmao

Stranger: yeah hahaha

You: but like yk when like a little sisters older siblings s/o would take them on a "date" to show them how to be treated u could do that- idk

Stranger: yeah idkk

Stranger: we shall see

You: we shall broski, just uh dont do anything that chris hansen would ask u to sit down with him over XD

Stranger: hahahah

Stranger: i have no idea who that is

Stranger: oh i looked it up

You: yeah XD

Stranger: lmao

Stranger: yeah like it is weird but not the age difference

Stranger: 3 years is not a lot

You: oh abt the friends sibling thing? XD

Stranger: ya

You: ik 3 years isnt alot in like the grand scheme of stuff but NOW 3 years is the difference between 6th graders and freshman and thats really weird

Stranger: yeah true true

You: and abt them being a friends sibling, um dont pull a kissing booth and be all dating behind everyones back- that movie was weird in general smh

Stranger: hahah

Stranger: yeah i wont

Stranger: his mom told me i would be a good son in law

You: LMAO too soon??

Stranger: 😂

Stranger: yeah right ilnow

You: 1) u arent even dating and 2) u think its weird

You: that would creep me tf out

Stranger: yeah but i dont really care

Stranger: i take it as a compliment

Stranger: it means im nice

You: yeah, im just a generally akward perso so XD

Stranger: hahahaha

You: but like uh if u dont wanna date a friends sibling dont, in most movies thats like number one best friend code no dating sibkings

Stranger: yeah i dont really care if my friend doesnt mins

Stranger: but i dont like her

Stranger: i like someone else

Stranger: and she doesnt like me back

Stranger: 🙃🙂

You: oh cool, aw that suckss u seem really chill and have a good personality so idk whats not to like thats prob my pansexual talking tho XD

Stranger: hahha

Stranger: ur attracted to pans?

Stranger: thanks lmao yeah idk

You: no i came out of the pantry smh

Stranger: 🤯🤯🤯🤯

You: common misconseption XD

Stranger: yeah shes my girl best friend

Stranger: so thats why she doesnt like me

Stranger: but maybe some daaaaaayv

You: oooo thats a hard place to get out of the f r i e n d z o n e

Stranger: ivee been tryyiiiiiiiing

Stranger: to make u love meeee

Stranger: but everything i try

You: *blasts u belong with me by taylor swift on a boombox* now go stand outside her window

Stranger: just takes you further from me

You: XD

Stranger: ghost town by kanye west is such a good song

You: oh i dont think ive listened to it lmao too much emo music and musicals

Stranger: you like kid cudi

You: who..? ugh i feel stupid not knowing stuff

Stranger: ur too young

Stranger: hes a legend

Stranger: makes good music u should listen to him

Stranger: kind of drug/depresion related

You: oh okay, that sounds like smth id listen too XD

Stranger: listen to love. by him on youtube or soundcloud

Stranger: it isnt on spotify

You: oh okay, i use amazon music like a loser XD

Stranger: oh

Stranger: yeah its only on yt or soundcloud lmao

Stranger: hahah doesnt matter right

You: yeah lmao

You: u wanna be friends? its ok to say no cause im 14 XD

You: im morgan btw whats ur name?

Stranger: hahaha aw thats a nice thing to ask

Stranger: but i just came on here to twlk to random people :( sorry

You: im not good at the whole "making friends" thing so idk what to do but ask lmao

Stranger: my name is julian

You: oh okay

Stranger: im sure u will make friends some day

You: OMG ofc its julian- i meet guys with m names or julius/julians never anything else

Stranger: hahaha what do y mean

You: i mean in the past week ive met a mike, mikey, and a mick then ive met like 4 julius' and 2 julians

Stranger: ahhaha wow

Stranger: thats funny

You: i swear idk what is up but smth is

You: my fbi agent is on smth ig

Stranger: hahahhahaha

Stranger: tryna set u up

You: yeah they want either an m&m or m j XD just m&ms or michael jackson IDFK XD

Stranger: haahahah

Stranger: so when did u find out u were pan sexual

You: uh when i was 11 i thinkk

Stranger: wow

Stranger: when i was 11 i was eating boogers out of my nose

You: yeah i knew i wasnt straight since like pre school girls are just too cute lmao

You: lmao thanks for sharing

Stranger: that is a facr

Stranger: women are cute

You: yeah they are XD

Stranger: hahaha

You: ummm idk what to talk abt now lol

Stranger: yeah me too lol

You: uh do u like heathers? like the movie or the musical

Stranger: never heard of it

You: REALLY??

You: my friends saying to skip u smh but i wouldnt dare

Stranger: what do u mean hahah

You: heathers is like a cult classic 80s movie like breakfast club or 16 candles or the outsiders

Stranger: ohh ok hahah

Stranger: i dont watch a lit of old movies

You: u know what those are right? especially the outsiders?

Stranger: only fiction

Stranger: never heard of them

You: U HAVENT???

You: OMG I SWEARR IF I KNEW U IRL ID LIKE FORCE U TO WATCH IT ITS THE BEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD MMMMMMm

Stranger: whats sliced bread

Stranger: 😂😂😂😂

Stranger: i swear i dont watch movies

You: like a loaf of bread XD its an expression

Stranger: oh lolllll

You: but like look up dallas winston MMMMM I LOVE THAT MAN

Stranger: hahah ok

Stranger: this was a fun talk dude hahah

Stranger: i ahve to go eat rn

You: okay byee nice talk too bad we cant be friends i wish u luck <3

Stranger: were kind of stranger friends

Stranger: so count me as a friend

Stranger: :S

You: okay too bad after this we'll never talk again

You: S?

Stranger: idk lmao

Stranger: yeah but thats life

Stranger: byeee 😘

You: yeah it is byeeee

Stranger has disconnected.

#omegle meirl

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karak9 · 5 years

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Another stupid long post about how I don't know my own fucking gender

This is honestly just copied and pasted from a yt comment I made on an older vid and I figured I'd share it here bc tumblr loves this shit I guess lol. God damn I've been questioning my gender for so long and ik rn im prob not still in the best position to be thinking about deep life shit like where I am mentally and im dealing with a lot in my life and also very insecure about potentially being trans bc a lot of my friends don't seem like they would be very accepting and my bf is only really into girls. I asked him how he would feel if I was nonbinary or looked like a boy and he just said he wasn't totally sure but he's only attracted to girls :c he's the sweetest bf in existence and im honestly so afraid of losing him, so aside from obviously not wanting to deal with all the other trans shit, I definitely hope im not trans bc I don't wanna lose him. Anyways, ill start with my childhood I guess. I was always super tomboyish. My older sisters (im the youngest sibling btw) were always p tomboyish so maybe I kinda got it from them but I kinda felt like I was more tomboyish than them? I felt like I was the most boyish girl I knew, like even meeting other tomboy girls in elementary school I felt like I couldn't really relate to them or like they couldnt relate to me enough idk. I also remember once making up a song about being like so tomboyish that I was basically a boy or something along those lines and sang it to my best friend at the time who I copied like all the fkin time (it honestly wasnt healthy lmao I didn't have good parents, also I think I started making up songs bc she did that and I wanted to like impress her), but she thought it was stupid and weird so I just forgot about it and moved on. I was embarrassed to even enjoy playing with dolls or play dress up games online and was determined to play masculine games like runescape (even tho I ended up doing girly shit in runescape anyways lmao) and considered myself one of the guys. In 5th grade when I started needing to wear a bra I absolutely didn't want to, tho some girls in my class thought it was weird I didn't wear a bra when they found out and that made me more insecure about it, but since then I've p much only worn sports bras. I have bought some more normal bras bc I wanted to look attractive in them for my SO or whatever but I still highly prefer my sports bras and can't stand wearing the other ones unless I have to bc my sports bras aren't clean lmfao. I always hated talking about genitalia and breasts n shit but that could just be bc of how I was raised and how my family was always so strict and such radical Christians and anything sex related was a sin, idk if its dysphoria or not. I've never rlly liked my chest and hated showing cleavage like so god damn much and still do but maybe that's the same thing or maybe I just want smaller boobs and that's it idk??? Like I'd want to appear to have a completely flat chest at least, idk if I'd want to actually like have a guy chest or not? Also huge issue with ppl seeing me naked or touching my boobs but again idk if that's gender related or just a normal issue I have. Tho I had a friend in high school (a girl, a very weird lewd girl) who would occasionally grope my chest randomly and it wasn't a huge issue but kinda made me uncomfortable and more aware of my chest. I really like when I wear big hoodies or when I lean over so my shirt kinda poofs out and it looks like I have a flat chest underneath. Though im not super uncomfortable with my boobs, like normally ill want nothing to do with them but I don't mind my SO touching them especially if they're really into it. I wouldn't say im rlly dysphoric about between my legs either, like yeah I think its weird and I hate monthlies and stuff but I think that's normal. I think if i woke up one day and had a dick I would be fine with it, I'd prob even enjoy it tbh lmao. I once had a dream that i was, well, a male dog like,,, ya know, with a female dog, and not to sound weird af (hey we were both dogs ok) but I think i kinda enjoyed it? I don't really remember any other dreams where I remember actually having a dick or feeling it but I've had several dreams as a male person, but p much all of them were like, I was seeing through a character's eyes or smth, not really that I was a guy, so idk if that's normal. I have the same dreams about being other girl characters, I'd say its split about 50/50. Because of this game community im in, a lot of ppl assume im a guy, and a lot of people still think im a guy and I haven't really bothered to correct them but idk if I find it more enjoyable bc its funny or if I enjoy not being referred to as female for once. I'll admit I feel most comfortable referred to as they/them, like without a doubt, if I could go by only 1 set of pronouns for the rest of my life it would be they/them. But ik that's not enough to call myself trans. I definitely wouldn't want to be 100% male. Like if I imagine myself as a grown man vs a grown woman id prob choose to be a woman. I don't like my voice but I think that's mostly just bc I sound 10 years younger than I actually am, and wouldn't really want a deep/masculine voice. Like a "tomboy" voice would be fine if that makes sense? I don't want facial hair or want to have a masculine body, I like that I have curves and soft skin and small hands. Personally I like my hair long bc its soft and people love it, but sometimes I kinda wish I had short hair and could pass as a boy. Like I'd wanna be a typical cute kpop boy ngl lmfao. I like the whole cute androgynous/feminine boy look and wish I could pull it off. Tho I also like really girly things sometimes and am okay being seen as a girl, i just want to be cute and attractive. Ik whether im trans or not I like being a mix of feminine and masculine, tho I admit in the past I've been kinda insecure bc I used to be super sure I was nb and thought me liking girly things and wanting to still havd long hair and wear girly clothes made me seem like "not trans enough" or whatever. But i guess here I am questioning myself again anyways. If I am nb, it sucks that ill never really be able to be openly myself and all but I've accepted by now that I kinda have to pick a binary and choose what I want to be seen as for the rest of my life, and im ok with being female. There are some things I dont like about my body whether they're really gender related or not but I can't afford to transition and wouldn't like most of the effects of T and am afraid of surgery and not sure I want top surgery enough to ever get it anyways, but I think if we lived in a perfect world and I could magically change my body at will and I wasnt afraid of judgment or being unattractive or whatever, I'd probably want to look androgynous and itd be cool to be able to change my genitalia at will lmao. If I had to choose 1 genitalia over the over I honestly have no idea what I'd choose but I have no desire to ever get bottom surgery, at the same time tho I honestly wanna someday get surgery or w/e to never be able to get pregnant. I just could not handle pregnancy or giving birth and I don't even like babies and breast feeding sounds awful so if I ever have kids they will be adopted 100% and most likely be older and like not newborn babies lmfao, babies are honestly so weird to me and they stink and cry and they're so fragile and im so afraid of like dropping them when I hold them lmao. But I like my nieces and nephews and I like being the cool aunt (is there a gender neutral version of aunt/uncle?) who lets them use my art supplies and helps them do fun stuff even if I get tired of them sometimes lol. Idk if that's gender related either but yeah I guess. This if kind of a more recent thing but I often say I'd make a great bf kinda as a joke bc of how I am in relationships like being the stereotypical sweet bf type who makes things for their partner a lot and wants to be their knight in shining armor and their protector and all that, but again prob not rlly trans related lmao just thought I'd throw that out there I guess. So when I was 17 was when I really started getting into trans stuff, prior to that I mostly just learned from my parents that trans ppl were "against god" and all that bs, and eventually started realizing lgbt+ isn't as bad as my family said and later realized I was bi. But anyways I met an agender person online when i was 17ish and I'd never heard it before and thought it was really interesting and asked them how you know you're agender bc after hearing their explanation of it i thought it described how I felt, but ofc they weren't transmed and just described it as being like a deep feeling or whatever and since then i started calling myself agender (and switched between a few labels but basically nonbinary) until my transmed friend told me I was ridiculous and that I wasn't trans, and honestly he was a huge dick but im a huge pushover lmao and I thought well he's trans so he must know what he's talking about, and though I felt discouraged about it I stopped calling myself nonbinary. Then I began questioning it again after not too long and basically since then I've been questioning my gender off and on. I'm now 22 and god I fucking hope im cis but also I feel like a part of me doesn't want to be cis if that makes sense?? Idk if that's because I don't like being a girl for some weird deep reason I don't know about despite being pretty sure I've gotten a lot of my feelings and their reasons behind them figured out, or if it's because I am trans and dont want to force myself to pretend im a girl 100% forever. At the very least, whatever the fuck my gender is, I want to continue going by they\them wherever I can and pretending to be a boy to strangers online and I'd love to cosplay male characters and bind and occasionally just dress masculine for the hell of it and probably wear sports bras for the rest of my life. I feel like in a way I cang possibly be trans because I can live with all of those things and be fairly comfortable still being seen as female for the rest of my life. But idk, I have bpd and other mental shit so sometimes im not great with my feelings (tho I do try really hard to identify all of my feelings/emotions and stuff) but at the same time bpd can cause weird identity shit so maybe its just a weird mix of a bunch of crap and im not actually trans but just weird and tomboyish enough to question my gender for 5 years and still be unsure. Also I know a lot of ppl suggest talking to a therapist/psychologist/whatever professional and trust me I would love to but I can't currently and am unsure when ill be able to bc they're expensive and I live in the middle of fucking nowhere so finding a decent therapist around where I live rn is going to be very difficult. Also, I have fucking crippling social anxiety lmao like I'd be so afraid to open up about this stuff even to a professional. So if anyone could suggest anything online that could help that would be amazing

#Trans #nonbinary #nb #genderqueer #gender questioning #transmed #pls help me lmao I hate my brain sm #also im so sorry if this post is scuffed af #im on mobile #its 4 am I cba

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youtiaoshutiao · 6 years

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translation: a love so beautiful || 致我们单纯的小美好 (the novel) → chapter 1

After contemplating for a while, decided to embark on attempting to translate the novel of ALSB! Tbh I’m pretty terrified because it’s 60+ chapters of commitment and I’m not sure if I can even last five……….. Eeps, no promises!!

Also I’m still working on improving sentence structure and arranging the english translation in coherent sentences when doing translations, please do bear with my being a total utter novice ):

original text by: 赵乾乾 (zhao gan gan)

translated by: yt st / youtiaoshutiao @ tumblr

disclaimer: translation here is purely for non-commercial purposes, and I don’t own the original work. please credit this tumblr if borrowing any translation from here. :)

notes: translator’s notes are bolded and bracketed, terms translated literally are italicised. sometimes i take liberties with punctuation and certain phrasing when translating too. :P

Chapter 1

Comrade Old Chen, aka my dad, retired officially this year in February. Old Chen who had been working tirelessly for his entire life couldn’t sit still after staying at home for half a month, and coincidentally the Senior Citizens Club in the county was recruiting members, so he went. Once he went, he realised that he at fifty-plus years of age was considered to be youthful and the backbone in the Senior Citizens Club where the average age was seventy years. Hence, Old Chen’s enthusiasm that had laid dormant for a long while was set aflame. Everyday, he would ride his bicycle and go to the Senior Citizens Club to organise entertainment activities for the elderly. That wave of enthusiasm was an entire time of burning passion.

Except that before his passion had burnt time, time/his years (on in age) first made a display of strength and authority. He, that old man, while climbing a stool to hang up an event banner, stepped off into air and fell.

I received my mum’s phone call just as I was standing by the main road looking at the advertisment signboards, and was so frightened that my whole body was covered in cold sweat though it was a really hot day. Even though I was always being beaten by Old Chen when I was small, and I had also thought of beating Old Chen when I grew up, but I really did love Old Chen.

While rushing to the hospital, I was crying while long-windedly telling the taxi driver about all the good things about my dad, till the 7-feet-tall robust-looking taxi driver was extremely moved. The whole journey, he was stepping down on the accelerator to its maximum extent; when I paid the fee he took the initiative to round down the fee. He said, “Girl, remember my car’s license plate number, XXXX, next time, please don’t flag down my car anymore, I have an extremely long-winded wife and mother at home, so once I hear someone chatter on I tremble. Please forgive me, and I hope your dad recovers soon.”

……

When I reached the hospital, crying, my mum so happened to be paring apples while scolding my dad. “An old skeleton like you, the backbone?! If you fall one more time I’ll directly push you to be burnt, you can upgrade from being the backbone to being bone ashes.”

I clutched the doorframe, tears pooling in my eyes. “Mum, how is Dad?”

Mum lifted her head and took a look at me. “Tch, take back your tears. What are you crying for? I raised you up with a hand full of faeces and a hand full of urine (NOTE: meaning to endure all kinds of hardship), not for you to have a hand full of snot and a hand full of tears the moment you encounter some problem.”

I took back my tears, and went to greet that old fellow who had been bullied long-term. “Dad, are you alright?”

My dad anxiously gazed at the apple in mum’s hand. “Not alright. Your mum has pared three apples already, and has not even given me one to eat.”

I saw that I wouldn’t be able to get an answer about what exactly had happened from their mouths, so I simply picked up the thermos bottle and said, “I’m going to get some hot water.”

I carried the thermos bottle and made a beeline for the inquiry counter, not caring about my mum who was shouting at me from behind, “This damned child, the bottle is full!”

Perhaps my appearance was overly malevolent, for the nurse quickly got a doctor to come over. The doctor, with zero emotion on his face, related my dad’s circumstances to me. He said that my dad had fallen on his waist, and his backbone was now pressing against a nerve – basically that my dad needed to be operated on, and that I was to prepare 30000 RMB.

I asked some more questions about the specific details of the situation. The doctor looked at me and said, “Even if I told you, you wouldn’t understand. Just prepare the money and leave everything else to us doctors.”

I asked again, “Then when can we do the operation?”

He said impatiently, “Join the queue, when it reaches your turn, we’ll do it.”

I was itching to spit a large mouthful of thick phlegm on his face, then tell him, “I’m sorry, I have tuberculosis.”

But I couldn’t do that, I could only fish out a few hundred RMB from my pocket, and submissively shoved the money towards him. “Then I’ll have to trouble you to take care…”

He glared at me and pushed away the money. “What are you doing! I can understand your feelings as a family member of the patient, but this is not in line with the rules! If you do not feel reassured, I’ll just find some free time to explain the situation to you in greater detail.”

I was beside myself with guilt, thinking that I was really gauging the stomach of a gentleman with the heart of a vile person (NOTE: meaning to view the actions/intentions of a great person/gentleman through the lens of one’s own stingy/mean/evil worldview), the doctor was just naturally ill-tempered. Just as I was profoundly examining my own personal integrity, that doctor turned around to leave. Before he left, he lifted his chin and gave me a look. I pondered for a long time whether he was cramping or if there was another meaning behind that action, till I finally copied him and lifted my own chin, upon which I understood – there was a CCTV installed on the wall……

I was just about to ask the nurse where the office of that doctor was when my phone rang. When I took out my phone and had a look, my heartbeat sped up like stepping on the accelerator while going downhill, I almost wanted to go to the cardiology department and register (to see a doctor).

Jiang Chen, my ex-boyfriend.

Trembling, I reverently answered the phone. “Hello?”

After saying hello for a long while, I could only hear a bunch of assorted random noises. It seemed like he had accidentally pressed his phone. I was about to hang the phone up when I heard a sweet female voice. She was saying, “Doctor, my chest hurts.”

It was only then that I recalled – Jiang Chen was a doctor, and he reportedly was a little famous now too. I hung up the phone and agonised for ages, finally deciding that rather than staying here experiencing the dark side of my home country’s medical industry, I might as well transfer to the hospital where Jiang Chen was. At least on account of how I had peeled thousands of tea eggs (NOTE: a common Chinese food - tea-infused eggs!) for him back in the day, he more or less had to show some consideration, right……

When I returned, I told my mum about this matter. She asked, “Is Jiang Chen that child that you had a case of puppy love with?”

Uh… the points you remember sure are unfathomable.

Mum asked again, “If we transfer to the hospital he’s at, will he help? What I’m saying is, do the two of you still have mutual affection?”

That sure was a question that hit the nail on the head. I stammered, “He definitely will help… It’s just that…”

“Just what?”

“It’s just that this seems a little like ‘that which scissors cannot sever, and, sorted out, is tangled again.’” (NOTE: a line from a poem “Crows cawing at night” by Song dynasty poet, Li Yu. Refers to one being unable to make a clean break, allowing feelings/emotions to fester. Translation for this line taken from “A Book of Chinese Verse” by A. R. Davis)

The old lady scoffed disdainfully. “Stop dragging literature in when talking to me, if you can’t sever it, shave it off completely! You will contact him now, and get your father to transfer hospitals tomorrow. I cannot endure these bastard doctors here anymore.”

I was originally depending on my mum to tell me with great affection, “Child, we must have backbone. We won’t provoke ex-boyfriends.” Sure enough, I had overestimated my mum.

Jiang Chen didn’t express any astonishment when he answered my phone call. I guess doctors are all like that, having seen and grown accustomed to great winds and waves (NOTE: meaning turmoil, dangers and difficulties). Corpses and internal organs all don’t scare him, how could he possibly be scared by me, an ex-girlfriend?

Stammering, I told him about the circumstances, and lastly said, “Can my dad transfer to your hospital?”

“Sure.” His reply was forthcoming and direct, causing me to be too embarrassed to bring up the matter of me peeling tea eggs for him.

He then said, “Prepare all the items, I’ll get a vehicle to fetch your dad to transfer hospitals right away.”

After that he was silent for a moment, before asking me, “Are you alright?”

Alright.

After hanging up the phone, I clutched my chest and leaned against the corridor wall, panting heavily. Beside me, a young nurse came over to support me. “Is anything the matter?”

I shook my head, feeling extremely gratified that I had at long last seen a ray of humanity in this hospital.

She continued speaking. “Who were you giving a call to on the phone just now? It seems like you are going to transfer hospitals? Which hospital management do you know? Can you introduce me to go there? I still have one more month till the end of my internship, and I haven’t found a hospital to hire me, can you help me, my grades are actually really good, it’s just that I am unwilling to sleep with the hospital directors…”

Faced with her pestering, I was truly at a loss, and could only say, “Actually the person I called was the cleaner of Centre Hospital, I agreed to sleep with him before he agreed to help me ask if it was possible to transfer hospitals.”

……

Three hours later, Jiang Chen brought an ambulance and whizzed into my presence. I had not seen him for three years, yet I didn’t even dare to raise my head to look at him properly. I only continuously stared at what was probably a really expensive fountain pen that was inserted into his white coat pocket, thinking if he had learnt how to write a doctor’s script yet.

While we were studying in university, I was always worrying for Jiang Chen, afraid that with his pretty-looking regular script, he would be unable to establish himself in the doctors’ circle. In order for him to practise and achieve a handwriting that would allow him to evade responsibility even if he wrote a wrong prescription, I had once forced him to copy my handwriting, but regretfully, he never managed to learn the true essence of my handwriting.

Jiang Chen handled the discharge and hospitalisation procedures all by himself. My mum and I had nothing to do, so the both of us, each with an apple in hand, squatted at the hospital entrance and chatted.

Mum said, “That young lad is worthy of having me watch him grow up, he’s really not bad.”

I expressed my contempt for her shameless conduct in attributing that young lad being not bad to her watching him grow up.

She then said, “Such a decent good, how did you miss out on him back in the day? It was clearly almost about to succeed.”

I took a bite of my apple. “Dad is all alone in the ambulance and bored, you should go and eat an apple for him to watch.”

Mum gave a long sigh and diligently ran towards the car. As she ran, she shouted, “Old fogey, your daughter made me come and eat apples for you to watch.”

Jiang Chen so happened to see this scene as he came out holding receipts of all sizes. Smiling, he looked at me. “You sure are filial.”

I raised my head to look at him. He was standing in front of me, half-stooped and lowering his head to look at me. His hair ends drooping low were bathed in a soft glow in the morning light. He smiled at me easily (NOTE: referring to ease that comes with much experience), with a deep dimple squeezed in his left cheek, as if it was just yesterday that we had a meal and watched a movie together.

I averted my gaze. This was a dimple of great evil. Back in the day, my little heart of affection was intoxicated precisely by this dimple. Thinking back now, I just felt that I had been defrauded by that tiny pit on his face.

Ever since I could remember, Jiang Chen’s existence was as matter-of-fact and expected as the electric pole at the entrance of the alleyway. He stayed in the building opposite my house, and was the mayor’s son. He was class monitor, had good looks, could play the piano, could write calligraphy, had good grades, and spoke pleasant-sounding Putonghua/Mandarin.

Television and novels would term a boy and girl who lived near each other since young like us as green plums and toy horse (NOTE: a Chinese idiom meaning childhood sweethearts), in addition, this was generally divided into two categories – the first was the type that were kind to and loved each other, with the two people being as close as siblings, scooping out a hornet’s nest together and getting stung by hornets together, stealing sweet potatoes together and getting beaten up together, till they suddenly look back and realise that their friendship had long since slowly progressed to love; the other type was those who hate each other, with the two of them fighting each other, tit for tat, where seeing the other from afar would make one just itch to rush forward and bite the other, where once one seized the opportunity, they would pull out the other’s bicycle gas valve, till they grew up and suddenly realise – ah, so this is love.

Unfortunately, Jiang Chen and I were neither of the above, for an endlessly long time, he and I were just neighbours who stayed opposite each other. Everyday, he would play his piano, and I would read my Chibi Maruko Chan comic with great relish. Occasionally if I forgot the contents of my homework, I would go and press his house’s doorbell. He was always very mocking, and would say impatiently, “Why didn’t you remember it yourself?” Perhaps it was because I was begging him for a favour, so I never bickered with him. But then again it’s also entirely possible that it’s due to me not liking to bicker with people since young. I as a person am extraordinarily unperturbed.

During the summer between Junior 2 and Junior 3, our class secretly organised an outdoor cooking activity after exams behind our teacher’s back. During the outdoor cooking, Jiangchen and I were allocated to wash the sweet potatos. There were 40 people in the class and we bought 44 sweet potatoes. Jiang Chen washed the first four, then stood to one side entertaining himself by skipping stones.

I squatted by the lakeside vigorously suppressing my rage as I washed the sweet potatoes. Just as my anger was rising while I was washing, a small slab of stone landed in front of me, splashing my whole face with water. When I raised my head however, Jiang Chen had assumed an air of nonchalance, as if nothing had ever happened. He raised his hand, and the stone landed on the water surface, making four beautiful consecutive skips. The water surface broke out into ripples of all sizes, colliding as they shimmered apart.

According to reason, I should scold him; splash him with water; dunk his head into the water; or push him into the lake to drown.

But I didn’t do any of that, I only stared at him in a total daze.

The light breeze lifted his somewhat loose white school uniform; the sunshine leapt on his eyelashes and hair ends, creating golden halos; his slightly-quirked lips pursed, creating a proud dimple on his left cheek.

Time and space froze, leaving only my furiously thumping heart.

#a love so beautiful #致我们单纯的小美好 #chinese novel #c-novel #translations #mine #alsb: the novel translations #the stone skipping scene is in the drama's epilogue albeit a different context #oh man i hope i have the endurance to last :3

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lifeisblessings-blog1 · 7 years

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HOW A PERSON CHANGED HER LIFE & GAVE A NEW REASON TO LIVE & LAUGH ! This is a story of my life which seems quite filmy & most of the people might just make fun of it but yeah it actually happened and my life changed completely.. So it all started 1 and half years before.. That was the most painful phase of my life. Thinking about those days still scares me. It haunts me! I was in a relationship with a guy for 3 years. We knew each other since childhood and slowly that friendship turned into some kind of special connection. He was a perfect kinda guy for me. Everything was going smoothly and but as we know that happiness doesnt last long,he was changing slowly and slowly but i couldnt see those changes. I was so much into him that i couldnt see any flaws in him. He used to insult me infront of everyone but still i was quiet,i was quiet becaouse i thought that he loves me truely. He knows me,he understands me which was the biggest mistake of my life. I was the topper of my class and he was 2nd rank holder. Oneday some of my friends told me that he has affair with some other girls too but i didnt believe them.. Even my brother knew about us and he tried to make me aware of him several times. But i refused to believe it ...I guess that was some kind of 'pyaar ka bhoot' types..Guess i did'nt want to believe it becaouse i knew,i knew that if those things will come true , my dreams will break into pieces and my life will be ruined totally.. Then one day i saw something which made my heart bleed. I saw him kissing a girl,and that girl was my best friend. I was shocked like totally. I thought as if my world just turned away. When i asked him what was all that and then we had a huge argument and he slapped me infront of so many friends.. I directly went home and i saw that my elder brother suddenly fell ill and my parents were taking him to hospital. I didnt evn got time to cry for my loss.. Then we got to know that my brother had a hole in his heart.. My parents took him to many places but doctors failed.. One month later we took him to london where our aunt was staying and then the doctors cured his disease. My parents were busy in taking brother to one doctor to another so they could'nt see what i was going through. On that interval of 1 month i was completely changed.. I used to sit in my room whole day crying,overthinking. I had no social life. I was so busy in maintaining my love life that till that time i had lost all my friends. I was all alone. I had no hope left. My studies was completely ruined. I even thought of ending my life and i even tried it several times but i guess life had somthing more written for me.. That time was a dreadful one. My parents got into financial crisis becaouse of my brother's disease. I couldnt even share my problems with them.. That one guy had ruined my life. He used to walk with another girl infront of me and seeing that i used to die million times from inside.. One day i was sitting in my room watching TV , there i saw a program named " Suroon ke rang colours ke sang " . It was a musical tribute to Sri. Gulshan Kumar ji . There i saw a person whose smile was so enchanting,they were two brothers named,Amaal mallik and Armaan malik. As soon as i saw Armaan i found some kind of connectn idk what was that. But at that time i was not in that state of mind that i could think deeply about any matter. Then without knowing who he actualy was i changed channel. After somedays i heard a song ' khwahishein' frm movie calender girls. As i am a music lover since childhood i spent those painful days of my life just by listening to music. And Suddenly when that song played especialy that line, " KAHAN LE AAYI YE KHWAASHIAN , KI DARD KI HAI YE BAARISHEIN , HAI GALTI DIL KI YA..HAI WAQT KI YE SAAZISHEIN " I was completely shooked within inside. Those lyrics were relatable and i found that voice realy different from others.. But i didnt paid much attention to it.. And After few months i heard a song " MAIN HOON HERO TERA " and trust me guys when i saw that video my eyes were struck,i got goosebumps and i literaly started crying loudly. Idk what actualy happened but yeah that was some kind of connection between me and the singer in the video. His eyes were so intense,his smile could light up the whole world and most of all his voice,it was like witnessing some magic. That was real,yet unreal.. That moment when i saw him my heart beat increased more rapidly. I searched about him and got to knw that he's ' ARMAAN MALIK" and i downloaded his songs,his live videos,his interviews,read his struggle. I got to know so many things about him. I never got so anxious about any other celebrity but he had somthing in him which was attracting me. That was not his look only,i guess god had sent him into my life to cure my pain,to take me out of depression. When i read his struggle,his hardwork i got more motivated.. I forgot everything that happened in the past and started to chase him everywhere. His journey motivated me to follow my dreams,his voice gave me relief to wipe out even my tears. His smile made my life even more brighter. He didnt know me but i got so much into him that it didnt matter for me. Idk when he became my topmost priority. Searching his live videos on YT and reading his intervies had become my daily job. I got addicted to him. Whenevr i heard his voice i move into diff zone,that heaven wala feeling. He took away all my pain and added a new meaning to my life. For others he might be a star but for me he's my whole world. He's that one person who have made my life beautiful by his presence. So many people thought i'm mad but these days nobody else opinion matters for me,the only person who matters is him... And now my life had moved into new direction. Jo jindagi ruk si gayi thi usko ek jeene ka sahara mil gaya tha.. And tha sahara was Armaan.. Fangirling him not only took my sadness away but also gave me new reasons to live.. I started my life with new enthuasiasm and trust me i'm so much happy rn. I feel so proud of myself that i came out of that trauma and rn i'm living my life with a new joy.. And this has been possible only because of him.. If i could bring a smile in his face once in my life toh bhi i'll think that my life is successful. I cried millions of tears before but he gave me million reasons to be happy.. Yess armaan didnt know that i even exist but my love for him increases more and more as each day passes by.... So this journey as his "ARMAANIAN " is a motivational and beautiful journey which made a simple girl to follow her heart and dreams. He isi'nt just a idol for me,he defines my life. His voice isnt just a source of joy for me but it's a reason for my life.. So in short Armaan Malik is a life changer for me.. [Such a heart piercing story💘. Left teary eyed. Guys in course of life we meet many people...Some leave us and some becomes so important & takes that special place in our heart. Love❤ is the most beautiful feeling in the world..But always remember ! If anyone ever cheated you...that dosen't mean he/she has found better than you , that means that particular person lost best one ! One who loved with all heart💟. That person dosen't deserved her...and glad to know she has now genuine reason to be happy for. IDOL - FAN love is so pure and innocent. That unconditional love💞. May God blesses her😇 & may she gets everything she wants for herself. May The happiness and satisfaction she gets Fangiriling his idol always makes her Smile😊 . Always remember...Life is not worth ending for someone. Life is a blessing... Live , Fight and learn beacause that is what makes you strong.]

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todokori-kun · 7 years

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‘I’d even ship him with Shuu’ what have you done now I’m actually shipping that (Shuu trying to be his usual romantic, flirtatious self and then realising Urie either doesn’t get it or doesn’t want to get it)

I KNOW IT’S SO SAD

TG’s quality does seem to be going down a bit these last few chapters (I think the real problem started with the Touken romance. I swear I’m not being salty about a ship I don’t particularly like being canon, I just feel like the pacing was a bit bad…Touka’s ‘are you a virgin’ came completely out of the blue, plus Touken has hardly interacted in Re before the recent chapters. It’s been YEARS since they’ve seen each other, wouldn’t things have changed? Neither of them are teenagers anymore. Both of them have grown and changed, but Touka chose not to stay near Kaneki and watch his growth, while Kaneki had no way to see how Touka’s experiences gradually changed her. But Ishida decided to suddenly make it canon and then start focusing on the Touka-Kaneki-Mutsuki triangle to the point where it feels like he’s abandoning his other plot threads… kind of like what Isayama’s been doing lately.).

However, I believe that Ishida is completely capable of making things better if he wants to (remember, he still has the Hide trump card- bring Hide back in a believable way that nobody has predicted and also adds to the story, and I imagine most of the fandom will forgive everything that’s gone wrong in Re so far) so I’ll stick around. Plus, I’ve just gotten too attached to all the characters ;-;

Ugh, y'know, even if it wouldn’t fit very well with all the implied Mutsurie, I wish Ishida would just pull a plot twist and make Ken/Urie or Urie/Saiko canon.

I think I kinda hate centipedes now.

1: Yeah, I don’t think that’s Mutsuki’s hand either (like you said, it looked pretty 'fresh’. Plus, I have no idea how Mutsuki would have gotten one of the limbs Torso cut off). The only reason I mentioned it was because of the parallel with Torso showing Mutsuki their own hand with a wedding ring on it…Ishida loves his symbolism so I thought this might actually matter to the plot.

2: I think it was probably either a stranger or an acquaintance, since she seems slightly surprised and not exactly 'happy’ to see this person, but not afraid or displeased either. I’m scared…why would Ishida not show us who it was if it wasn’t something important? If things went well Yoriko’s probaby just gained some knowledge about what’s going on (perhaps she’s been told where Touka is and why she can’t come to the wedding?), but if not…perhaps a villain’s blackmailing her…idk :(

3: I want to believe that too, but I’m not sure yet. If there’s a reason for Yoriko looking so serious then that might be connected with the mystery character who greeted her when she was out shopping.

Thank you, that really means a lot to me <3 What I’m really worried about right now is that I go to a piano 'hagwon’ (a cram school of sorts, I guess?) and this year they’re going to do a small concert. Everyone who goes to the hagwon has to play a song and I have no idea how I’m going to do this ;-; just trying to look a person in the eyes when I’m talking to them scares me, how am I supposed to get on the stage in front of a crowd (a small crowd, since everyone there to see the concert will be the parents/family of the kids participating, but seriously). Things are just a bit complicated XD

Adorable Shuu. I guess that would just make me tease him even more LOL I’d probably ruin all his dramatic moments.

(Now that I think about it, though, Shuu and I have similar interests: music, fashion, art, literature…though I guess he’s a lot more interested in food than I am haha)

Oh, I’m so glad you liked them! I tried my best ;)

I actually like doing matchup things so that may be why they’re acceptable…if I ever get a tumblr account I think I’d like to make a scenario/hc/matchup blog.

As for Storm in Lover, yep, that was from your 'the names are weird’ message XD after I decided to add Love Live into the headcanons I ended up going on YT to listen to a few of the songs. They were all really cool, but it just felt like Storm in Lover would be Urie’s guilty pleasure song (or maybe that’s just because I ended up likng SiL way more than I was prepared for?)

BLOW US ALL AWAY QUEEN LUNA

I’M GLAD MY HUMBLE HEADCANONS COULD HELP

I WILL WRITE MORE

AS MANY AS YOU NEED TO GET THROUGH NEXT WEEK

(Seriously tho

-since your hair is either 'too long and in a ponytail’ or 'really short and in a ponytail’, Urie is secretly very, very disappointed when you’re wearing it short. He likes playing with your hair when you’re too busy watching TV or reading to notice he’s being cute ok

-short or long, whenever Urie gets a hold of your hair, he WILL style it. Don’t you dare say no to the Captain of the Q squad. A simple ponytail? Unacceptable.

-Saiko approves of this relationship

-So would Sasaki, if Sasaki still existed

-Shirazu approves from beyond the grave

-Mutsuki doesn’t care)

Thanks! <33 And yeah, I think I’m slowly starting to get the hang of it ^^

I find all of those moments very relatable. Golfishes unite! :D

Burr is one of those weirdly shippable characters that almost every fandom seems to have…

And oh, I see! Honestly Tony is still one of my favorite avengers…RDJ really brings him to life. And if you’ve seen Captain America I definitely recommend The Winter Soldier and Civil War (next movies in the series)! So much Bucky angst ;-; Also the Thor movies, because I have a feeling you might like Loki.

Some of the best Loki quotes:

“Well done, you’ve just decaptitated your grandfather!”

“An ant has no quarrel with a boot.”

“Freedom is life’s great lie.”

“Oh dear, is she dead?”

Btw, do you remember the time I said I’d write a Heathers one-shot on the Yoi blog and never did? I think I’m getting over my writer’s block so maybe I can write that one-shot and submit it here?(And if that’s ok, do you maybe have any suggestions for which character I could use? I was going to write it as a Yuuri/reader but that doesn’t seem to fit so well anymore, so I might go with a TG character…I’d also like to use a character you like, since you’ll probably be the only person reading it ^^;;)

Speaking of Heathers though, when you have the time, is it ok if I try to drag you into that fandom again? Along with Dear Evan(s) Hansen. It’ll hurt you very, very badly but it’ll probably be worth it.

Oh dear, even more rarepairs. And I’m the one who ‘invented’ this one. Well, like I’ve said, as long as Urie is happy, I don’t care about whom he’s with.

ISHIDA IS A GHOUL, ONLY HE DOESN’T LIVE OFF OF DEAD HUMANS, HE LIVES OFF OF PEOPLE’S SUFFERING!!!

Honestly, you’ve voiced my thoughts perfectly. I can’t help but get irritated at all the changes that have been happening. For me, it started around the time we found out about Mutsuki’s past. I mean, can’t we have one character who had a nice childhood and isn’t insane deep inside? At this point, basically everything is overdoing it for me. Let them have a break. A nice moment. A single day without a centipede or someone dying. TG is slowly turning into shoujo manga. A sick, twisted shoujo manga, but a romantic one. That is the one thing I didn’t want from it. It was actually nice to have a manga without pointless crushes which play an important role in the plot, for a change. Guess I was wrong.

Dude, I don’t care who he kills, if Ishida brings Hide back, he is automatically forgiven for everything and anything. Well, I would care if he killed characters like, but other than that, he’s free to kill anyone he wants (like Furuta (or maaaaybe Mutsuki, but I’d like it better if they redeemed themselves (though that might be difficult))).

I just… I want the cookie to be happy. And Mutsuki is definitely not making him happy.

Gaaah, so many questions and symbolisms, it’s making my head hurt. Here’s my theory: This is a huge setup for everyone to be happy. Mutsuki will run away to New Zealand or something and restart their life, Kaneki and Touka will get married (tho I don’t quite ship it, whatever, as long as they’re happy), Urie will realise he’s loved Saiko all along and she’ll be there waiting for him. Kanae is actually alive and so is Hide. Kanae and Shuu get married. Hide finds himself a nice girlfriend (or boyfriend, not gonna discriminate), opens a pet shop and is happy.

Everyone is happy.

Okay, but imagine this au: ghouls don't exist and there's no reason for so much suffering. Kaneki and Touka are two kids who knew each other from school and now run a coffee shop together. The Q squad went ri the same class and Saiko alway loved Urie. He recently realised it. And so on.

Ah, I definitely know how you feel. I went to music school as well, and we had yearly (or half-yearly, depending on how long you’ve played the piano) recitals. My method of calming down was to imagine I was at home, alone and just practicing. There was no one around me, and it didn’t matter if I messed up. I could always start again. Also, the audience was vegetables, as far as my imagination was concerned. It did help.

I know you can do it (๑و•̀ω•́)و You’re a fighter! The great Evans who can always cheer me up when I’m down. If I’m the queen, then you’re the king! All hail king Evans who’ll kick the recital’s butt!

Oh you would ruin all his moments, and it would be the most amazing thing ever. I’d always laugh at it, cause he’d be denied of all his theatrics.

They’re not ‘acceptable’, they’re absolutely perfect. I seriously can’t thank you enough, because they were very nice cheer-up material after a whole morning of cramming my two least favourite subjects. I’m pretty sure you’d do amazing if you got a blog. You do have amazing talent for writing.

Oh my~ Would you mind then if I listed a few more songs, my favourites?

Yozora wa nandemo shitteru no?

Bokutachi wa Hitotsu no Hikari (there’s a bit of talking in this one, it’s hard to find a version that’s not sped up)

Omoi yo hitotsu ni nare

Mijuku dreamer

Guilty Eyes Fever

soldier game

Thrilling・One Way

Ookay, I’m done ^^ I’m telling you, Idol Hell is very subtle. You won’t even realise you’ve been dragged into it huehuehuehuehuehuehue

Aaand there goes my heart, again. I have no words to thank you enough for writing those, since they help me keep my sanity.

however, we know whom we’d like from TG, but what about other fandoms we share? AoT? YoI? Kuroshitsuji?

Yeah, I’ve been told many times that I’d like Loki, but strictly looks-wise, I must admit I prefer his brother, and I prefer him very much. Idk, I just have a thing for guys with slightly longer hair.

All of that sounds suspiciously like something I’d say…

Of course, feel free to submit anything here! As for the musicals, I’d be happy to listen to them, but after this week is over, because exams. Then, I’ll listen to both Heathers and Dear Evan(s) Hansen, despite the feels ^^

#evans #submission

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writingwife-83 · 7 years

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One od my top favorite stories is "I told you so". Now with the talk about Sherlock's YT Science of Deduction, I'd probably die happy if you ficced this hc/au! (Maybe John discovers it by accident or Sherlock starts it for Rosie educational process) *puppy dog eyes aka Sherlock's but failing miserably * :D

Wow the YouTube thing is that popular an idea lol! And…ok your puppy dog eyes and flattery worked. I’m only going to write a tiny thing right here though. Can’t come close to using all the ideas that were sent my way, but here’s one little Sherlock YT/sherlolly ficlet…

“Oh, Molly, hello,” Mrs. Hudson said sweetly as they crossed paths on the landing.

“Hi, I’m just here to help-”

“Oh he’s making one of his videos again!” She grimaced. “He won’t let me up there for hours at a time some days!”

“Yeah, I know I’m bringing him…” Molly hesitated. “Something for that.”

“Well good luck!” Mrs. Hudson waved to her and headed back to her own flat.

Molly climbed the steps and listened before knocking at Sherlock’s door. Heaven forbid she interrupt the recording process.

“Hello! I’ve got the um, skin samples,” she announced when finally swinging the door open.

“Oh excellent!” His eyes lit up. “And I’ll need an assistant as well!”

“Well…I suppose.”

She had “assisted” a couple times before and it was a bit of a tedious process. He was all business, maybe even more so than when there wasn’t a camera on him. Though, Molly wondered if perhaps she could help him to try something else on for size.

“Good!” Sherlock clapped his hands. “We’ll do the experiment introduction over here and then move to the kitchen for the rest.” He pulled up a chair and patted the seat, encouraging her to sit next to him.

Molly dutifully hung up her coat and scarf and took a seat, despite the fact that she hadn’t exactly planned to be in front of a camera that day. All the more reason to turn the tables on the Consulting YouTuber!

Sherlock started his webcam recording and smiled.

“I am Sherlock Holmes and this is another edition of The Science of Deduction. We have quite a lot to cover today, so let’s get started. This is my friend and colleague Dr. Molly Hooper. She’ll be assisting today.”

“Hello!” Molly gave a grin and wave to the camera. Then she nudged him. “Sherlock, why don’t we do something fun first?”

He looked instantly frightened. “W-what are you talking about, Molly? We’re showing the viewers the effects of different chemicals on-”

“Oh I know, but I bet they want to know something fun about you! Come on, we can do the experiment right after!”

Sherlock looked back and forth from the camera to his grinning assistant. He made a move toward shutting the camera off, but then stopped and sighed.

“Right, fine. What shall we tell them?” he asked with a little head wag.

“Hm, how about how much you love to dance?” Molly bit her lip and smiled as Sherlock’s cheeks turned a little pink. She looked at the camera and pointed at him for extra emphasis.

“I rarely dance,” Sherlock attempted.

“Yes, but you’re very good!” Molly looked back at the camera again and emitted a little gasp. “Hey, why don’t you show them a little something?!”

“Oh no no, I couldn’t-”

“Oh yes, come on you should!”

“Nobody wants to see-”

“They do! I’m sure they all do!”

“Fine!” he finally growled and got up from his seat, prompting Molly to make an excited face at the camera. Though, she looked a bit different when she saw his hand reaching out towards her.

“You are the assistant today, are you not?” He raised a brow.

“Oh.” She laughed nervously. “Um…ok.” Well, she’d gotten herself into this, so she couldn’t argue about playing along.

Molly stood, and after Sherlock had turned the laptop toward the open center of the room, she aligned herself properly with Sherlock, his hands warm and strong around hers and her waist. He took his mobile out and began a classical song playing and cranked up the volume. Their feet began moving and Molly had to continually remind herself that they were being filmed. She rather wished they weren’t now, seeing as she could feel the heat pooling in her cheeks as she looked up into his eyes.

“Dr, Hooper,” Sherlock said in a low voice. “Aren’t we supposed to be entertaining the viewers? Perhaps you should see if you can recite the periodic table while keeping step?”

Molly smirked at him. Oh yes, now he was trying to get back at her now.

“I can’t do both those things at the same time. Not while you’re-” She stopped herself. “It’s just a bit difficult to do the two things at once. Different parts of the brain, you see!” She made a humorous expression at the camera, trying to continue with some sort of education for Sherlock’s sake.

“Well, we wouldn’t want to be too boring though,” he said with a mock thoughtful expression. And then he spun her out, causing a little yelp to come from her lips.

Molly laughed as he spun her back into his arms and continued leading them around the small space. She could swear he’d pulled her in closer after that spin.

Sherlock began rattling off some previews of the upcoming experiment they’d be doing, though the whole time he had his eyes locked to hers as their feet moved. Molly was riveted and it felt like the longer she looked at him the more fluid their movements became. She was admittedly disappointed as the music began to slow. He surprised her again though, anchoring his hand further around her back and leaning her backward into a dip, his face inches from hers.

“And that,” he murmured, finishing his thought for the viewers while still looking into her eyes. “Will be the experiment that we’ll be showing you in just a moment.”

Molly hung there, feeling weightless. She was a breath away from moving her face upward just a bit and touching her lips to his, but she also didn’t want to A) possibly make a fool of herself, and B) give him anything he’d have to edit out. Because heaven help her, she was not going to kiss Sherlock Holmes for the first time in front of the entirety of the internet. That was the recipe for media rumors to spread like wildfire!

She finally tore her eyes from his and looked toward the laptop. “We’ll take a short break and then be right back. Got to take off our dancing shoes and put on our protective gear on!”

Sherlock took the hint and finally lifted her up again and then stopped the camera. He perched his hands on his hips and smiled at her. “Happy now?”

“I am.” Her answer came out a bit breathier than she’d intended and she had to clear her throat. “I mean, it just seems like you’d get a few more viewers if you do some fun things in between the science stuff.”

He tilted his head in thought. “Well, I suppose the likes will speak for themselves.”

“Yes, I think they will,” she said with a confident little nod.

“Science?”

Molly smiled. “Science.”

Two days later Molly woke up to see a few texts from Sherlock waiting in her inbox. She couldn’t help but laugh as she began reading.

HOW IS IT POSSIBLE THAT I’VE GOTTEN ONLY ONCE COMMENT RELATED TO THE ACTUAL EXPERIMENT?? -SH

ABSOLUTELY NOBODY SEEMS TO REMEMBER THAT THIS IS A SCIENTIFIC CHANNEL AND NOT ONE PRIMARILY FOR FUN! THEY’RE ALL COMMENTING REQUESTS TO DO IDIOTIC CHALLENGES NOW! I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT ANY OF THESE EVEN MEAN! -SH

THE OTHER MAJORITY OF COMMENTS ARE REGARDING WHETHER WE’RE TOGETHER, AND IF NOT, WHETHER YOU ARE SINGLE! -SH

Molly could barely catch her breath by the time she got to the third message. But she had to smile at the fourth one though.

INCIDENTALLY THOUGH, MY SUBSCRIBERS HAVE SKYROCKETED AND I HAVE AN ASTRONOMICAL NUMBER OF LIKES ON THIS VIDEO…FANCY ANOTHER FILMING SESSION NEXT WEEK?? -SH

Molly thought for a moment and then typed her response…

IT’S A DATE. xxx -MH

#Anonymous #wifey answers things #sherlolly #mollock #Sherlock on YouTube #I kinda had to #after all those anons lol #hope this makes people happy!#gotta admit that this felt an awful lot like a certain internet and media centered fic I wrote many moons ago...#good times

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