#i am trying to write a serious meta about the bar fight AND answer some asks but i keep getting distracted | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

itsclydebitches · 3 years

Note

Hello again! Im the tinfoil hat anon with the long ass asks and I finally had the time to read your response. Thank you, it makes my day reading your answers. I honestly just enjoyed them over a cup of coffee like a good book.

Now, the gun pointing scene I mentioned was in fact the one from the droid fight facility like the other anon suggested. But I really liked that you covered the boat scene too, I haven’t thought of it much myself and now I definitely have!

I also would like to mention I love your “candy bar” choice analogy and I 100% agree Hunter’s “invitation” to join back wasn’t welcoming in the slightest. It is very likely just an obligation as you said. Sort of “you gave us a chance, we owe you a chance too”.

And the problem with it is now I am struggling to figure out how the batch members might change their attitude toward Crosshair going forward, especially Hunter. As of right now Crosshair’s best relationship is not with his brothers but with Omega(as surprising as this is). And I think he does realize now she cared about him the most out of all of them during the short time they interacted(both 1st and last episodes). Even between themselves(not counting Omega) I find most of the bad batch members to be cold and distant to each other. They feel less like a family than Rebels for example. And they aren’t even a “found family”(a trope everyone loves) but an actual one! And I get that they’re soldiers and supposed to be tough, I don’t expect them to share all “the feels”. I just can’t put my finger on it but something feels off. I agree with your previous post, the show doesn’t do a very good job showing or even telling they love each other.

Will Hunter and co only start caring about their brother again only after he leaves the empire?(assuming he does at some point). What about Disney’s prevailing theme and message that “family always love and care for each other no matter what”? I guess it’s “family always love and care for each other but only if you’re good guys making right choices”. There is no room for mistakes or wrong decisions. In the last episode everyone form the batch seemed to have given up on Crosshair(besides Omega). For now their attitude seems to be just “you’re not our enemy” and that’s that.

I realize Crosshair is a “bad guy” and consciously made his choice(and we know it’s the wrong one) but to me it felt like he thought he didn’t even had a choice or rather became so lost and confused he actually thought he chose the empire as “the lesser evil”(as in the less shitty choice out of all the other bad ones). We as audience have the benefit to know exactly how atrocious the empire really is but maybe Crosshair still doesn’t realize that.

So what exactly must Crosshair do to get back “in their good graces” as you say? Start saving “the good guys”? Save the bad batch multiple times? There is a popular opinion on how Crosshair can redeem himself. That he eventually heroically sacrifices himself to save them. I personally REALLY hope it’s NOT what’s going to happen but I heard so many people speculating his story is set up to be redemption=death. I know you mentioned you don’t want “Vader style redemption” either. Personally I think it would be a waste of a character who has a lot of potential. And I just think that the batch kind of don’t really deserve his sacrifice(maybe save for Omega) after how they never tried to save him themselves and how they treated him overall. Maybe he will risk his life to save Omega at some point and that will “prove” to Hunter he cares? Although he has already shown he cares by saving her(even if in Crosshair’s own words it’s just so they’re “even”). And the thing is, he doesn’t need to prove that he loves them, he already did that in episode 15 and made it clear he does care. He actually went to extreme by shooting his squad to prove his loyalty. What were the moments the batch demonstrated they care about him? Hunter saying “you never were our enemy” and taking his unconscious body to safety? To me Hunter “not leaving him behind” during bombardment felt more like guilt about the last time it happened and an obligation to Crosshair for helping them with droids, rather than them showing care. And I kinda of think if that was any random civilian(or anyone other than an enemy or a threat) they would carry them out too just because that’s what good guys do and not because it’s their brother. You also mentioned that minutes later Hunter snaps at him with “if you want to stay here and die, that’s your choice” which I agree can be interpreted in different ways. And I think it’s one more point to it being an obligation that in Hunter’s eyes is fulfilled now. He corrected his mistake of leaving a brother behind and saved him this time, now his guilt won’t burden him any longer.

Anyway, I can’t wait for season 2 and I appreciate you and all the anons sharing the tinfoil hat, interacting and speculating together. Those discussions have been a lot of fun!

TLDR: How do your think the relationship between the brothers will mend or evolve in the next season? Do you think S2 will improve in portraying the batch more as a family rather than a group of mercs doing missions together? What are your thoughts on the popular idea of Crosshair’s redemption by ultimate sacrifice? As in, how likely do you think this scenario is?

Anon, that is just wonderfully hilarious to me. Ah yes, the sunrise, a good cup o' joe, and the overly long character analysis of a snarky, fictional sniper. Exactly what everyone needs in the morning! 😆

You know, TBB is far from the first show I've watched where there's an obvious, emotional conclusion the creator wants the audience to come to—the squad all love each other Very Much—yet that conclusion isn't always well supported by the text. It creates this horribly awkward situation where you're going, "Yes, I'm fully aware of what the show wanted to do, but this reading, arguably, did not end up in the story itself. So what are we talking about here? The intention, or the execution?" It's like Schrödinger's Bad Batch where the group is simultaneously Very Loving and Very Distant depending on how much meta-aspects are influencing your reading: those authorial intentions, understanding of how found family tropes should work, fluff focused fics/fan art that color our understanding of the characters, etc. And, of course, whether someone saw TCW before they watched TBB. I personally wouldn't go quite so far as to say they're "cold" towards one another—with Crosshair as an exception now—but there wasn't the level of bonding among the squad that I expected of a show called The Bad Batch. Especially compared to their arc in TCW. The other night I re-watched the season seven premiere and was struck not just by how much more the squad interacted with each other back then, but how those interactions added depth to their characters too. For example, Crosshair is the mean one, right? He's the one picking fights with the Regs? Well yeah... but it's also Wrecker. While they're trying to decide what to do with Cody injured, Jesse calls out Crosshair on his attitude—"You can't talk to Captain Rex like that!"—and Wrecker's immediate response is, "Says who?" and he hefts Jesse into the air. And then he just holds him there, clearly using his superior strength to do as he pleases, until Hunter (sounding pretty angry) tells him to put Jesse down. If Wrecker had put him into a more classically understood bullying position, like pinning him to the ground, it would probably read as less funny—less "Haha strong clone lifts Jesse up in the air!" and more "Oh shit, strong clone can do whatever the hell he wants to the Regs and few are able to stop him." It's such a quick moment, but it tells us a ton about Wrecker. That he's going to stick up for his brothers, no matter the context (Crosshair deserves to be called out). That he will gleefully assist Crosshair in bothering the Regs (something that is reinforced when he later throws the trays in the mess hall, after Hunter has already deescalated the situation). That he's likely been hurt by awful treatment from the Regs too. That he'll only listen to Hunter when it comes to backing off. Little of this work—that interplay among the squad that shows us new sides to them other than basic things like "Wrecker is the nice, happy brother"—exists in TBB.

Or, at least, little exists after Omega becomes an official member of the squad.

Because, as said previously, she becomes the focus. I don't mean that as a total criticism. As established, I love Omega. But if we're talking about why the squad can feel so distant from each other, I think she's the root cause, simply because the story became all about her relationships with the Batch, rather than the Batch's relationships with each other. Having dived headfirst into reading and writing fic, it occurred to me just how many of the bonding moments we love, the sort of stuff we'll see repeated in fics because we understand that this is where the story's emotional center is, are given to Omega in canon:

Someone is hurt and in need of comfort. Omega's emotional state is the focus + moments like her being worried over Hunter getting shot.

Someone needs to learn a new skill. Echo teaches Omega how to use her bow.

Someone reveals a skill they never knew they had before. Omega is a strategic genius and plays her last game with Hunter.

Someone is in serious danger and in need of rescue. Omega rescues the group from the slavers + is the most vocal about rescuing Hunter. (Which, again, is a pretty sharp contrast to the whole Crosshair situation.) Omega, in turn, needs rescuing from things like the decommission conveyor belt.

Similarly, someone is kidnapped and in need of rescue. Omega is kidnapped twice by bounty hunters and the Batch goes after her.

Someone saves another's life. Omega saves Crosshair from drowning.

Someone does something super sweet for another. Wrecker gives Omega her room. Omega gives Wrecker Lula.

A cute tradition is established between characters. Wrecker has his popcorn-esque candy sharing with Omega.

Someone hurts someone else and has to ask forgiveness. Wrecker is upset about nearly shooting Omega and they have that sweet moment together.

Note that most of these examples could have occurred between other Batch members, but didn't. Someone could have created a space for Echo on the ship too. Wrecker also could have apologized to Tech for choking him, etc. It's not that those moments shouldn't happen with Omega, just that there should be more of a balance across the whole season, especially for a show supposedly focused on the original squad. Additionally, it's not that cute bonding moments between the rest of the Batch don't exist. I love Hunter selling Echo off as a droid. I love Wrecker and Tech bickering while fixing the ship. I love the tug-of-war to save Wrecker from the sea monster. Yes, we do have moments... it's just that comparatively it feels pretty skewed in Omega's direction.

So, as a VERY long-winded way of answering your question, I think we need to fix the above in order to tackle Crosshair's redemption in season two. Now that we've had a full season focused on Omega, we need to strike a better balance among the rest of the squad moving forward. We need to re-established the "obvious" conclusion that the rest of the Batch loves Crosshair and that's done (in part) by establishing their love for one another too. To my mind, both goals go hand-in-hand, especially since you can develop their relationship with Crosshair and their relationships with each other simultaneously. Imagine if instead of just having Wrecker somewhat comically admit that he misses Crosshair (like he's dead and they can't go get him??), he and Tech had a serious conversation about why they can't get him back yet, despite very much wanting to. Imagine if Echo, the one who was rescued against all odds, got to scream at Hunter to go get Crosshair like Omega screamed at them to go back for Hunter. Imagine if we'd gotten more than a tiny arc in TCW to establish the Batch's dynamic with each other, providing a foundation for how they would each react to Crosshair's absence. Instead, what little we've got in TBB about Crosshair's relationship with his brothers is filtered through Omega: Omega's embarrassment that she knocked over Crosshair's case, Omega treating Crosshair's comm link like a toy, Omega's quest to save Hunter that just happened to involve Crosshair along the way.

Obviously, at this point we can't fix how the first season did things, but I think we can start patching over these issues in season two. It would be jarring—we'd still be 100% correct to ask where this "Brothers love you, support you, and will endlessly fight for you" theme was for Crosshair's entire time under the Empire's thumb... but I'd take an about-face into something better than not getting any improvement at all. It is frustrating though, especially for a show that I otherwise really, really enjoyed. For me, the issue isn't so much that the show made a mistake (since no show is perfect), but that the mistake is attached to such a foundational part of the franchise. Not just in terms of "SW is about hope and forgiveness" but the specific relationship most clones have with each other: a willingness to go above and beyond for their brothers. The focus on Omega aside, it's hard to believe in the family dynamic when one member of the family was so quickly and easily dismissed. I couldn't get invested in Hunter's rescue as much as I should have because rather than going, "Yes!! Save your brother!!!" my brain just kept going, "Lol where was this energy for Crosshair?" It messes with your reading of the whole story, so in order to fix that mistake going forward, we need to start seeing the bonds that only sometimes exist in season one. Show the guys expressing love for one another more consistently (in whatever way that might be—as you say, soldiers don't have to be all touchy-feely. Give us more moments like Wrecker supporting his brothers' bad habits) and then extend that to Crosshair. Which brother is going to demand that they fight for him? Which brother is going to acknowledge that they never tried to save him? Which brother is going to question this iffy statement about the chip? In order to buy into the family theme, Omega can't be the only one doing that emotional work.

Ideally, I wouldn't want Crosshair to go out of his way to prove that he's a good guy now. I mean, I obviously want him to stop helping the Empire and such, duh lol, but I'm personally not looking for a bunch of Extra Good Things directed at the Batch as a requirement for forgiveness. Simply because that would reinforce the idea that they're 100% Crosshair's victims, Crosshair is 100% the bad guy, and he's the only one who needs to do any work to fix this situation. Crosshair needs to stop doing bad things (working for Empire). But the Batch needs to start doing good things too (reaching out to him). Especially since Crosshair made a good play already, only to be met with glares and distrust. He saved Omega! And AZI! And none of them cared. So am I (is Crosshair) supposed to believe that saving one of their lives again will result in a different reaction? That doesn't make much sense. And no, his own life wasn't at risk when he did that, but does every antagonist need to die/nearly die to prove they're worth fighting for? As you say, he's already shown that he loves them, far more than they've shown the reverse. Every time Crosshair hurt them (attacking) it was while he was under the chip's influence. In contrast, the group has no "I was being controlled" excuse for when they hurt him (abandonment). Season two needs to acknowledge the Batch's responsibility in all this—and acknowledge that they're all victims of the Empire—in order to figure out an appropriate arc for Crosshair's redemption.

Right now, the issue is not Crosshair loving his brothers, the issue is how Crosshair chooses to express that love: trying to keep them safe and giving them a purpose in life by joining the organization that's clearly going to dominate the galaxy. The only way to fix that, now that his offer has been rejected, is for him to realize that a life on the run from the Empire, together, is a better option for everyone. And the only way for that to happen is for the Batch to seriously offer him a place with them again. They need to make the first move here. They need to fight for him. And yeah, I totally get that a lot of people don't like that because it's not "fair." He's the bad guy. He's with the fascist allegory. He's killed people and has therefore lost any right to compassion and effort from the good guys... but if that's the case, then we just have to accept that (within the story-world, not from a writing perspective) Crosshair is unlikely to ever come back from this. When people reach that kind of low, they rarely pull themselves out on their own. They need other people to help them do that. Help them a lot. But with the exception of Omega's reminder—which Crosshair can't believe due to how everyone else has treated him—they leave him alone and seem to expect him to fix himself first, then he gets their support. It needs to be the other way around. Support is what would allow him to become a good guy again, not "Well, you'll get our love when you're good again, not before." That's unlikely to occur and, as discussed, it doesn't take into account things like this bad guy life being forced on Crosshair at the start. If the story really wanted this to be a matter of ideological differences... then make it about ideological differences. Let Crosshair leave of his own free will, right at the start. Don't enslave him for half the season, have him realize he was abandoned, imply all that brainwashing, give him no realistic way out, and then punish him for not doing the right thing. This isn't a situation where someone went bad for the hell of it—the story isn't asking us to feel compassion for, say, the Admiral—it's a situation where Crosshair was controlled and now can't see a way out. That context allows for the Batch, the good guys, to fight for him without the audience thinking the show is just excusing that behavior. They should have been fighting from the start, but since they didn't, I hope we at least start seeing that in season two.

Ultimately though... I don't really expect all of the above. The more balanced dynamics and having the Batch fight for Crosshair rather than Crosshair going it alone... I wouldn't want to bet any money on us getting it, just because these are things that should have been established in season one and would have been more easy to pull off in season one. (If the Batch wouldn't fight for Crosshair while he was literally under the Empire's control, why would they fight now when he's supposedly acting of his own free will? It's backwards in terms of the emotional effort involved.) But again, it could happen! I'd be very pleased if it did happen, despite the jarring change. I don't want to make it sound like I think they're going to write off Crosshair entirely. Far from it, I think there are too many details like his sad looks for that, to say nothing of Omega's compassion. But the execution of getting him on Team Good Guys again might be preeeetty bumpy. I expect it to revolve around Crosshair's sins and Crosshair's redemption, even if what I would like is balancing that with Crosshair's loss of agency, the Batch's mistakes, and their own redemption towards him.

Honestly though, I just hope that whatever happens happens soon. It's a personal preference, absolutely, but after a season of Crosshair as the antagonist, I'm ready for him to be back with the group, making the Empire (and bounty hunters) the primary enemy. Whether his return happens through a mutual acknowledgement of mistakes, or through Crosshair being depicted as the only one in the wrong who has to do something big to be forgiven... just get him back with the squad lol. Because if the writing isn't going to delve into that nuance, then the longer he remains unforgiven, the longer some of us have to watch a series while going, "Wait, wait, wait, I really don't agree with how you're painting this picture."

#TBB #The Bad Batch #SW #Star Wars #mymetas #long post

7 notes · View notes

robininthelabyrinth · 7 years

Note

Coldwave Prompt: “But what if I fall?/Oh, my darling, but what if you fly?”

Fic: Daydream Believer (AO3 Link)Fandom: The Flash, Legends of Tomorrow (mostly characterization)Pairing: Mick Rory/Leonard Snart, background Lisa Snart/Cisco Ramon, Lisa Snart/Iris West/Eddie Thawne, Patty Spivot/Barry Allen

Summary: Everybody’s always wanted a chance to live out their wildest childhood dreams.

It just so happens that Leonard Snart, mild-mannered structural engineer, dreamed of being a comic-book style supervillain.

———————————————————————————————-

Everybody’s got dreams.

Some people have dreams that take them when they’re children, dreams of what their life could be, should be, glorious dreams that make you wake up with a smile on your face.

Some people get to live those dreams.

Others…don’t.

It’s not that Len doesn’t like being a structural engineer! As jobs go, it’s incredibly fulfilling, though he still wistfully wonders what would’ve happened if he’d taken accounting instead like he’d originally wanted. He’s got a masterful hand for design and a way of thinking that lets him visualize his buildings in perfect 3D in his head. Hell, even his hobby – studying the blueprints of buildings throughout the city to analyze them for security weaknesses and figure out how he could do it better – is work-related, so clearly, he enjoys what he does.

It’s just, you know.

It’s not what he dreamed of as a kid.

Of course, when Len was a kid, he dreamed of becoming a comics book style supervillain.

It’s not exactly a real job: you don’t see it on the quizzes suggesting what college major might be right for you, or job hunting on the Internet, or well, anywhere, really. It’s just the dreams a of a child.

Len doesn’t regret taking on the loans he did so that he could keep Lisa in his care, showing that – although young – he was a college student on the Right Track instead of a corrupt cop with a penchant for mob-related (and unsuccessful) theft or a junkie who only sometimes remembers that Lisa’s her daughter. He’s paid off those loans and he’s put Lisa into college and he’s, you know, doing okay. Got a good job, nice apartment, the works. He’s content. Maybe not happy, but content.

He still wishes he lived in a superhero universe, but hey, what can you do.

He figures that’s the end of it – keep going the way he is; now that he’s made partner at his firm and can do whatever the fuck he wants time-wise as long as the job gets done, he can presumably devote some time to finding a nice girlfriend or boyfriend or non-binaryfriend like Lisa keeps hinting at – and it would be, except for the Particle Accelerator explosion.

He’s working late that night, sees the flash of light outside his window, sees the news stories in the weeks that follow. A few months later, the first weird incident occurs. A little later, another.

The online community proposes that these incidents are actually caused by people – people who have been granted special powers by the Particle Accelerator explosion, like comic-book gamma rays except that they didn’t actually kill you and they did actually give you superpowers. These people are dubbed ‘metahumans’.

Len thinks it’s so cool.

He didn’t get any superpowers, of course – his life is not anywhere near that awesome – but he immediately runs to that great information consolidator, the Internet, to find out more. A few months in, he’s joined a chat group with the various Internet self-proclaimed experts on the subject of metahumans: Patty (taking police academy lessons so she can save up money for an eventual career as a CSI, whose Instagram pics of suspected metahuman sites are second to none), Kadabra (works in Mercury Labs, does freelance scientific analysis of various incidents, also weirdly obsessed with stage magic for some reason), Axel (high schooler with an attitude problem, but lots of free time to run errands for the rest of them), and, of course, Iris (metahuman blogger extraordinaire, always first on the scene – he thinks she works as a barista, but her dad’s a cop and she has smuggled out crime scene descriptions so even beyond her in-person investigation, she’s a glorious source of news-news-news. He keeps telling her to apply to be a journalist somewhere.)

It’s just a hobby, though.

Well, at first.

When the Streak appears, it’s – it’s not just a hobby anymore.

We’ve got a superhero!!! he texts the group, along with a picture stolen (hacked) from a speed camera. It shows definitively that the bolt of lightning is – as they suspected – a metahuman, not a force of nature.

I KNOW OMG, Iris responds immediately.

I haaaaate police academy, Patty sends. I want to be OUT THERE already!!! with the METAS!!!

Just skip, like I do, Axel texts.

You skip one more day and I will cut you into pieces in my lab, brat, Kadabra replies.

Seconded, Len sends. Structural engineer – I know where to bury body parts.

WTF, both of you, Axel says. And they say teenagers are morbid.

You more than most LOL, Patty sends.

What if he’s a danger?? Kadabra sends, ignoring the part of the chat that rapidly devolves into rude emojis going back and forth.

He’s been doing good work, Iris objects. Stopping bad guys.

We don’t know if they’re bad guys.

Uh, they’re trying to KILL PEOPLE; they’re bad guys.

I’m just saying, I’m not sure I’m comfortable with a superpowered metahuman deciding he can take justice into his own hands, Kadabra writes.

Kind of the definition of a superhero, Len notes.

Some of the people the Streak has stopped have disappeared, Patty says. Gotta say, it’s a little worrying.

For some reason, that’s what twigs the idea in his mind.

That old childhood dream.

Len stares at the chat, his friends going on and discussing the pros and cons of vigilantism, especially when superpowers are involved. Discussion of how balance works – whether the superhero is the response to the metahuman threat, or whether the superhero will act as a lightning rod to draw in more crazies – discussions of who watches the watchmen –

Guys, he texts the group. I think I’m going to become a supervillain.

OMG, Patty texts. Really???

Dead serious. That way I can keep the superhero on his toes & make sure he’s not murdering people at random, plus if any new bad guys show up, I’ll be able to get the first scoop.

I am so in, Iris texts. You have to tell us EVERYTHING.

You get me photos, I will give you my soul, Patty says.

I can help with lab analysis, Kadabra texts.

Oh, god, yes, me too!!! Patty throws in. Team Supervillain is definitely on as of right now!

We need a better name than that, Axel puts in. And I don’t know if I can do anything –

Stay in school and keep an eye on the rumors, Len says. I don’t want to get, like, a dumb name or anything.

But ur not a meta, Axel replies. The streak will kick ur ass.

I’ll figure something out :)

Len clicks out of the chat.

Hey, you know what they say about dreams. Shoot for the moon; you might land among the stars.

Not his fault his dream’s a little unorthodox.

——————————————————————————————————————

The first heist is easy enough to plan. A couple of drunks from the bad side of town, a handful of badly guarded diamonds, a really interesting use of liquid nitrogen, and suddenly everyone else in the slum part of downtown is convinced that he’s some super-thief from out of town despite his fairly heavy Central City accent.

He pays the guys out of his bank account – it’s amazing how little they’ll accept on the grounds that fencing diamonds is hard – and mails the diamonds back to the owners with some suggestions on how to improve security.

He’s not really expecting to get mail in return asking if he’d be interested in seeing if he can crack the security around the Kahndaq Dynasty Diamond, because they’re bringing in a very good fake – it is Central City, they’re not stupid – and they’d really like to know before they take the real Diamond on tour, but hey, it’s as good an excuse as any.

He gets a crew together.

And then the Streak comes.

OMG OMG OMG, Patty texts. Did he touch you???

He punched me, Len texts back, amused as ever by Patty’s enthusiasm.

HOW ARE YOU NOT DEAD, Kadabra writes. SPEED = FORCE; SPEEDSTER PUNCH = DEAD LEN!!!

Maybe Len has no mass, Axel writes, clearly sitting in his science class at school.

It’s my lack of gravity that does it, Len writes back immediately, and grins when everyone sends him little dagger emojis.

He goes searching for something that’ll help him stop a speedster. He’d thought liquid nitrogen would be the answer – speed and cold, after all – but if he can’t even see the Streak, he’ll never be able to use it in a controlled manner, and he’s got to be cautious about these things.

Luckily, with his name, his family history, he can walk into the worst bar in Central and everyone will go ah, yes, Snart – he’s one of us.

The squirrelly man who sells goods from STAR Labs is a godsend.

(One who Patty proceeds to bag as her very first police arrest on the force, thanks to the evidence Len sent her; she’s very pleased.)

Len’s a little worried about whoever bought the matching heat gun before he could get there, but whatever.

He’s got a Streak to fight and a diamond to steal.

——————————————————————————————————————

CAPTAIN COLD, Iris texts gleefully. CAPTAIN FUCKING COLD!

I am the COOLEST supervillain, Len replies, equally gleeful.

Fuck you and the puns you came in on, Axel texts.

Just chill, Axel, Len sends.

I hate you.

No need to be so cold.

HATE.

Guys, I think Axel’s freezing me out. What do I do?

FLAMES ON THE SIDE OF MY FACE!!!

Oh, he’s breaking out the Clue references, Iris types. Now we’re really in trouble.

Did you get the diamond? Kadabra asks.

Yeah, I’ve got it. Gonna send it back, of course, but right now it’s a great paperweight. Beautiful piece of ice.

Fuck you so bad, Axel writes. How are you simultaneously this awesome and this dorky?

Says the high schooler in the metahuman conspiracy chatroom, Len types. We wouldn’t be here if we weren’t dorks.

Still, well done, Iris writes. Icing the train was a work of genius. Very supervillain.

I’m still not sure how the Streak managed to turn what would have otherwise been a relatively minor slippage disturbance on the tracks into a fully-fledged train wreck, but whatever, Len replies. At least he also got everyone out.

And the awful night train is gone and the city finally has an excuse to replace it, Patty says happily. She’d had to ride that train for a while. They’ve already gotten approval from their insurance people; they’re so crazy happy right now. You’re everyone’s favorite supervillain.

Len smiles. He’s got the best team.

I want to know everything, Iris says. Not just what you gave me to put on the blog.

I’ve got a lead on who the Streak is, he tells her smugly. And he does, too – the faces of the Streak’s accomplices were unmasked, just right out there like they’re asking to be looked up online. And where you find accomplices, you find the mastermind – or, well, the hero.

Coffee. Tomorrow, Jitters, noon. OR DIE, she writes back immediately.

Oooh, RL meet-up! I’ll be there, Patty writes.

Bah, work; no way I’ll make it, but you’d better catch me up later, Kadabra writes. Axel – don’t even think about it.

Yeah, yeah. No worries. Tomorrow’s chemistry; I’m not skipping it.

Awww, our budding little chemical engineer, Patty coos.

With my sister in mechanical engineering, I think we’ve got the whole set, Len adds.

GOTTA CATCH ‘EM ALL, Patty writes.

So, CAPTAIN COLD, what’s next? Iris asks.

Len just smiles.

——————————————————————————————————————

Being a supervillain is basically better than anything Len could have possibly imagined.

He’s Captain Cold, now; people call him Cold instead of Snart, the bartender puts on Cold as Ice every time he comes to the bar – he has a theme song! – and he has an action figure.

People are still figuring out the whole Streak/Flash thing, since they can’t see him, but Captain Cold, they’re pretty damn sure is a villain.

Really, all he needs is an excuse to get the Flash to come and fight him one-on-one, and everything will be perfect. But he knows better than to just go out with the cold gun, flash it around – hah! – and hope everything will work out fine.

Kidnap one of the Flash’s teammates, Iris suggests. She’s got a rather wicked streak to her.

Are you sure you don’t want to be a supervillain, too? he asks.

Let me think of a theme first, she says. Right now I’m enjoying being the Flash’s favorite reporter.

I am rather curious as to why he chose you, Patty says. No offense, you’re great, but there’s a whole city of reporters with way more publicity than your blog gets.

I’m pretty sure he works with my dad sometimes, Iris says. Dad has been REALLY squirrelly about the whole metahuman/Flash thing. He’s even convinced my otherwise awesome foster-bro to try to talk me out of writing about the Flash because it’s ~~dangerous~~

Let me guess, Patty says. It’s OK for them because they’re guys, but you’re a delicate flower that needs to be protected.

Iris is the opposite of a delicate flower, Len writes. Iris will raze this city in her wake if she feels like it.

Awww, Len, you say the nicest things, Iris says. Still not sold on becoming part of your supervillain club. Which, FYI, you still need to name.

Villains United? Kadabra suggests.

Legion of Doom? Axel sends.

No, Len says. Relax, it’ll come to me. Besides, I don’t see any of you guys working out your supervillain identities.

I’ve got something planned, Axel writes.

Not if it interferes with school you don’t, Kadabra writes.

Ugh, FINE.

I’d join up in a heartbeat except for how the cop thing is currently paying my bills, Patty writes. Also, can we, like, murder Mark Mardon?

First we need to FIND Mark Mardon, and also pls keep all discussions of murder offline, Len writes.

Wasn’t it Clyde that killed your dad? Iris asks.

Same difference.

Not really…

I don’t want to talk about it.

Anyway, I’m still looking for the edge I need for the next match with the Flash, Len writes before the argument gets any more serious. Though I think the suggestion of kidnapping one of his teammates is a good one.

, Iris texts. Go for the girl; superheroes are so UGH about that.

You’re just sore about your dad + bro, Len texts back with a smile.

Hell yes I’m salty AF about it, she replies.

Len rolls his eyes and mildly hopes that Iris’ family figures out that no one puts Iris West in the corner before she does end up going supervillain on them.

——————————————————————————————————————

The few months after his first encounter with the Flash are spent gathering intel and – almost entirely by accident – creating a legend.

Everyone seems to assume that a supervillain has to have some sort of backstory, and Len’s sadly all-too-public family history – corrupt, abusive cop turned mob thief – has led to some seriously absurd speculation about him being a high-end diamond thief (due to the contract he now has with four of the diamond importers in town to test their security, which he’s been doing quite well – he can afford to pay the crew out of the advance proceeds, so even his savings aren’t taking a hit anymore) who is internationally wanted but who has connections with the criminal underground so deep that he’s managed to erase all of his criminal record.

Len laughs for, like, an hour when Axel tells him about it.

No one’s ever confronted him about it, or even mentioned it, so it’s not like there’s anything Len can do about it. He has no intention of lying about anything, but seriously, no one ever asks him anything. He just goes places, people are super into him, and then, after he fails to do anything spectacular, they forget about him and start talking.

Which is how he ends up drinking in a bar, listening to everyone chat around him, gathering what he needs to know. He’s never kidnapped anyone before; he’s gotta do his research.

And that’s when someone walks up to him and pokes him in the shoulder.

Len turns.

There’s a guy there – big guy, broad shoulders, shaved head, shiny patches of scarred skin starting around his neckline and crawling down his forearms, peeking out from under his loose grey button-down shirt.

“You Captain Cold?” the guy asks.

He’s got one of those voices that makes your toes curl.

Len’s, at least.

“You’re really hot,” Len’s traitorous mouth proceed to say, totally without his consent.

The guy blinks, obviously taken aback, but Len’s committed now, so he fixes on his best smirk and leans forward. “How can I help you?”

“You know, I’d heard you were a lot more chill than you are,” the guy says.

“Maybe you warm me up,” Len shoots back.

“Can’t be that icy if that’s all it takes to get you hot,” the guy replies, his lips spreading into a grin.

“What can I say? You were so hot, you stopped me cold,” Len says, batting his eyelashes innocently.

“Guess I’m getting warmer by the minute with the puns.”

“What can I say?” Len says. “I know what lights my fire –”

The guy barks a laugh. “Mick Rory,” he says, face flushed with pleasure. “Arsonist. Nice to meet you.”

“Leonard Snart,” Len replies. “Supervillain.”

“Mind if I sit?”

“Please do,” Len says, eyes dropping to review the man’s very shapely figure and stopping cold (hah!) at the familiar-looking style of gun strapped into the man’s thigh. “I think you and me have lots to talk about.”

Mick follows Len’s gaze. “Yeah,” he says, and grins. “I think we do.”

——————————————————————————————————————

Glory glory glory hallelujah, Iris texts. Leonard Snart, you are the BEST. Central City has an official superhero at LAST!

The Flash, in person, Patty sends, attaching a few snapshots she snagged during the big confrontation.

Head to toe leather, really? Kadabra snipes. Is he a superhero or an escapee from a fetish convention?

If that was the case, it’d be PVC, not leather, Iris says.

TMI, Iris, he replies.

I’m a writer, Iris sends back. I know many, many things. Some stranger than others. I can send pics of some of those stranger things – tell me, how familiar are you with certain internet subcultures?

I yield the field, declare defeat, surrender unconditionally, etc., Kadabra replies. I don’t even know which one you’re thinking of, and I don’t WANT to know.

More importantly, why does he go with the full cowl? Axel sends. A domino mask is x100 cooler.

Let’s get back to how freaking AWESOME Len and his brand new buddy were out there, Iris sends. Did you get arrested after the big blow-out at the end?

I should have realized about crossing the streams, Kadabra sends apologetically. Sorry.

No worries, Len says.

At least there wasn’t a giant Stay Puft Man involved, Patty opines. Always a risk when you’re talking about crossing streams.

Len! Did! You! Get! Arrested?!?! Iris sends.

They made us do a walk of shame through the CCPD and then shoved us in a van headed for Iron Heights without processing us, Len reports. Totally illegal, btw, but whatever.

He’s a little steamed about that, actually; they didn’t even bother to check his fingerprints to see if he had a criminal record – he didn’t; hadn’t gotten so much as a driving ticket since he turned eighteen – and he’d consulted with Patty before he’d set up the fight. If the Flash showed up to fight him, literally all they’d be able to charge him with was being a public nuisance.

Well, and kidnapping, but for some reason he didn’t think Caitlin Snow would be making any statements to the police.

Reasons like “aiding and abetting a vigilante.”

But they hadn’t bothered – they’d looked at him and thought ‘Snart’, just like everyone else in his goddamn life, and coupled with Mick by his side, they’d tossed them straight into the prison van and figured they’d deal with them later.

Lisa had paid off the van drivers in advance, so the ensuing break-out was both spectacular and totally victim-less. And since the police hadn’t even charged him with anything, he can’t even be charged with escaping police custody.

“You texting your friends again?” Mick rumbles from next to him in the bed.

Len turns and grins at him. Sleepy and satisfied is a good look for Mick. Then again, Len hasn’t really found a look that isn’t good on him. “They’re good people,” he protests mildly.

“You like talking to ‘em, you talk to ‘em,” Mick says agreeably. “Gotta keep an eye on your crew.”

The way his thumb caresses Len’s hips indicates that he’s willing to make an effort to distract from it.

“They’re complimenting us on our excellent supervillain style,” Len tells Mick. “Let me enjoy my adoring public.”

“I’ll give you adoring,” Mick growls.

Len has just enough time to type BRB and toss the phone onto the bedside table.

——————————————————————————————————————

“I’m going to murder him,” Iris announces, walking straight into their apartment and throwing her hands in the air.

“I’m in,” Lisa puts in, grinning at her newly found best friend.

(Lisa had thought he was insane for the supervillain thing, then she’d met Iris and suddenly everything was a-okay in Lisa-land. Len’s pretty sure she’s angling for a threesome invite, and he’s pretty sure she’s going to get one, too, judging by the way Iris eyes her in return.)

“Which him?” Len asks mildly. “Speaking as a ‘him’, I’d prefer to know what I’m signing up for.”

Mick grunts from where he’s eating a bowl of cereal.

He’s adjusted quite quickly to random people walking in and yelling strange things, though he does tell Len he thinks it’s odd that Len’s chosen a safehouse in a fairly nice apartment complex where the neighbors sometimes knock to ask for a cup of sugar and to fist-bump him on his excellent supervillainy.

Len explained that he owns the apartment.

Mick was impressed.

“Eddie,” Iris says. “He’s in on the Flash thing now! And he’s refusing to tell me!”

“You haven’t told him that you know who the Flash is?” Len asks.

Iris snarls. “He’s my foster brother,” she says, her dramatics not hiding the fact that she’s actually pissed off about it. “And – I thought – my best friend. He should tell me these things. He’s told my dad, he’s told my boyfriend, he’s told random strangers that he only met after his coma –”

“Nine months in a coma after being struck by lightning, wakes up in better physical shape than before, suddenly hanging out with the Flash’s accomplices,” Lisa ticks off on her fingers.

“Add the fact that he obviously talks about it right before I come in through the door then changes the subject abruptly despite the fact that I totally heard him,” Iris says. “And sometimes, when he thinks I’m not looking – I’m talking that I’m still in the room, just not looking his way –he’ll superspeed something. Like I won’t notice that the desk is suddenly clean or the dishes are all washed!”

“Isn’t his speed accompanied by lightning?” Mick asks.

“It is!” she wails. “That’s what makes it so stupid – does he really think I don’t see the light out of the corner of my eyes? Humans are born predators! We notice movement before we notice anything else, including variation in tone and texture and color! I can’t tell if he thinks I’m stupid or what!”

“He probably just thinks he’s very good,” Len puts in. “And he isn’t.”

“He’s a boy in his early twenties,” Lisa drawls. “They all think they’re much better than they are.”

Len sighs, long-suffering, as Iris and Mick laugh at his wrinkled nose. Just because he was happy that Lisa had an active and satisfying sex life didn’t mean he wanted to hear the details, really.

“Anyway, I have a plan to get you your guns back,” she says briskly.

“I’m listening,” Len says, smiling at how Mick perks up. Mick loves his gun: his pyromania is totally tickled pink (red?) by it.

“Second verse,” Iris says, “same as the first. But this time we kidnap a bit of extra incentive.”

——————————————————————————————————————

Len drops Cisco and Dante off at STAR Labs, no harm done to either of them.

“That was amazing,” Mick purrs.

“I didn’t do anything,” Len says, smiling. “It was Iris’ idea, bringing the brother in; and Lisa was able to grab Cisco, no problem.”

Though she really needed to stop collecting would-be lovers or she’ll end up in an orgy.

“The way you threatened him with frostbite was beautiful,” Mick says firmly. “I wouldn’t have thought to go after his fingers.”

“Piano player,” Len says, smirking. “You can always tell.”

“So we going to hit that truck?”

“Yep,” Len says, utterly satisfied. He can’t believe they’re so foolish as to send another diamond truck on the same route – god, he’s talked to them about this! He’ll have to be extra stern in his next letter. It helps that Mick isn’t in this for the cash – as long as there is cash, he doesn’t care if it comes from their thieving or if it just appears on the table.

Len’s bank account is rich and full. Mick’s barely making a dent.

(Len’s designing a bank for work at the moment, which honestly he could do in his sleep. It’s fun to split his time between blueprints for heists and blueprints for work. Also, the irony makes him smile.)

“You sure the Flash’ll let us hit it?” Mick asks doubtfully.

“Trust me,” Len says. “He’ll want to confront me about kidnapping his friend; he’ll forget that you two are perfectly capable of getting the truck all on your own.”

Sure enough, Len finds himself in the woods somewhere outside of Central.

“Maybe I’ll speed you off to my secret prison where you can’t hurt anyone,” the Flash says cockily.

“And then I won’t be around to stop my newsfeed from releasing your identity the world,” Len drawls in return. Honestly, did the Flash not think that he’s thought of this? That was like, contingency number one.

Besides, if Barry Allen really does go and lock him into STAR Labs, Iris will just break him out.

They end up bargaining: no attacks on the Flash’s friends and family (easily agreed) and no killing (even easier) in return for the Flash letting Len run free as his supervillain.

It all went even better than he thought.

The Flash ditches him, a crackle of lightning all he leaves behind.

The Rogues, he texts the group.

What? Iris replies.

Villain group name, he says. The Rogues.

I LOVE IT, Patty sends.

Okay, that’s pretty cool, Axel concedes. Not too dorky.

If you assholes would stop vetoing my supervillain ideas, I’d join up in a minute, Kadabra promises.

Stop having stupid stage magician themed ideas, then, Iris replies. This isn’t the 90s, okay? Only serious supervillains need apply.

There was a woman who murdered people with electric bees literally last week, Len points out.

And she’s not invited into the club, Iris shoots back.

Point, Len concedes.

I’m recruiting Hartley Rathaway, once I track him down, Patty says. Sonic gloves are great! Plus, deaf supervillain – disability representation for the win!

We got the truck, Mick sends. He’s been a little more hesitant to join the texting group, but once he was assured that the chatroom was as private as current internet hacking skills could manage and everyone was overwhelmingly nice to him, he’d slowly started warming up to them.

Pun intended, of course.

Great! Len replies encouragingly. He really wants Mick to be friends with everyone; it’s important to him that everyone is happy and comfortable with each other.

Then he looks around.

Speaking of comfortable…

Could you guys send me a pickup? I’ll turn on the GPS tracker on my phone so you can find me…

——————————————————————————————————————

Iris spends a lot of time curled up in Len’s apartment eating ice cream after the pseudo-black hole incident. She’s pissed off at Barry for nearly screwing everything up. She’s pissed off at Eddie for very nearly committing suicide. She’s pissed off at her dad for conspiring to keep her in the dark about the Flash stuff for months.

Honestly, at this point, Len’s crew and Firestorm – Stein and Ronnie both – may be the only people she’s talking to.

Len’s Rogues are growing nicely, though. Mick’s there, of course, as Heatwave, and Lisa under her knew alias as the Golden Glider. Hartley joined up happily enough and is going under the name Pied Piper – he’s currently working on some sort of sonic flute. Shanwa, surprisingly enough, actually likes the name Peek-a-Boo, and is as thick as thieves with Lisa and Iris and Patty. Axel found his calling as the Trickster – Kadabra yelled at him for three hours about doing anything with the old Trickster, ever again, and Axel had folded like a bad poker hand, especially after they’d explained exactly how badly he’d been played – and now he’s using and abusing his chemistry genius.

He’s still going to school and getting good grades, though. He swears after his last stunt, Kadabra abruptly appears and looms over his shoulder any time he even thinks of skipping.

Of course, Axel also claims that Kadabra has started cooking up actual magic in that lab of his.

Kids.

“I just hate all of them,” Iris says sulkily.

“I feel you,” Len says.

Admittedly, he’s only half paying attention. His bank design is getting to the crazy portion; he needs to devote a lot of attention or the finicky details won’t iron out right.

“I think I want to be a supervillain, too,” she says.

“You’re not really cut out for it,” Mick says, putting a hand on her shoulder.

“I could be,” Iris says stubbornly.

“You’ve barely ever broken a law in your life,” Mick points out. “Never been arrested, never gone to jail, never got scarred up like the rest of us. You’re not like me and Len. Just leave it be.”

“I’ll think about it,” she says grumpily.

“You don’t even have a good theme yet,” he says soothingly, wrapping a blanket around her shoulders.

“Fine, fine. That one’s actually a good point,” Iris says, snuggling into the blanket.

Len smiles distractedly at Mick being adorably fuzzy. He’ll have to make up the last few weeks up to Mick somehow – maybe take him out for a nice burn on one of the condemned properties that Len bid for the destruction contracts for weeks ago, right after he first met Mick and learned about his pyromania.

He doesn’t think about what Mick said.

——————————————————————————————————————

“Oh god,” Len says.

“You killed him,” Barry says.

“Oh god,” Len says.

“Lisa was safe! You didn’t have to!”

“Oh god.”

“Um,” Barry says. “You’re – kind of freaking out?”

“He’s dead!”

“…yes?” Barry says, blinking. “Was that not the point?”

“Yes, but – but – oh my god!”

“I’m – okay, you’re seriously freaking out here. Is it because he’s your dad?”

“It’s because he’s dead!”

“…is there anything I can do to make you freak out less?” Barry asks helplessly. “Because you’re starting to freak me out.”

“Lisa,” Len says weakly. “I need Lisa. And Mick. Oh god.”

“Right,” Barry says, and suddenly everything is a blur.

Lisa is on her feet at the sight of them, dropping the towel she was holding to her mildly bloody neck. “What did you do to him?!” she shouts.

“Nothing!” Barry yelps. “Nothing! I swear! He shot your dad and then he started flipping out!”

“Go get Mick! And Iris! Now!” Lisa orders, whipping out her phone and texting.

Barry’s gone before she finishes talking.

Len is on the floor. He doesn’t remember sitting down.

“Lenny? Lenny, baby, it’s okay,” she says, crouching down next to him. “Lenny – Lenny, baby, big bro, it’s okay – look at me – you’re having a panic attack –”

Len’s ears are ringing and everything seems very far away. He can’t get his father’s face out of his mind.

“I got Mick!” Barry announces, reappearing with the man. “And Iris! Wait. Why did I go get Iris?”

Iris rushes forward. “Got your text,” she says. “Oh, Len!”

Mick kneels down and wraps his arms around Len. It helps with the shaking.

“He’s dead,” he tells Mick stupidly. “He’s dead.”

“Who’s dead?” Mick asks.

“Our dad,” Lisa says. “He put a bomb in my neck and made Lenny run jobs for him.”

“Shit,” Mick says, looking guilty. “I shoulda known something was up when you said you needed some time to yourself.”

“I didn’t want you involved,” Len says through numb lips. “He’s – he’s bad, Mick. He’s really bad.”

“And now he’s gone for good,” Lisa says. She sounds satisfied.

Len groans.

“…which I will never mention again, Lenny, I’m so sorry you had to do that!” she adds.

Iris is patting his shoulder. “It’s okay,” she says. “It’s okay.”

“Irsi!” Barry yelps. “Since when do you know Captain Cold?”

“I’m part of his Rogues, duh,” she replies. “Which maybe I wouldn’t have been, if someone had told me that they were the fucking Flash instead of keeping me in the dark and lying to my face for a year.”

Barry winces.

They’re still not talking about it.

“Wait,” Cisco says. “You’re a supervillain?”

“I’m more of a behind the scenes organizer,” Iris sniffs. “I haven’t thought of a theme yet. Anyway, can we focus on Len now?”

“He’s dead,” Len says dully. “I killed him.”

“Isn’t that kind of what you guys do?” Cisco asks.

“I’ve never killed anyone before in my life!” Len protests.

“What?!” Barry yelps. “But – we made that deal about you not killing anyone –”

“Easy enough to promise,” Len says. “Didn’t plan to do it anyway.”

“You really never killed anybody?” Mick says, sounding mildly surprised. “Not even in prison?”

“He’s never been in prison,” Lisa says. “Well, not except as, like, a visitor.”

“What, really?” Mick says, blinking.

“How’d he manage that?” Caitlin asks, frowning. “Statistically, most expert criminals spend at least a little time in prison before they’ve perfected their technique –”

“He’s a supervillain, not a criminal,” Lisa says impatiently. “He’s never been to prison, he’s never been arrested – well, not properly – and the worst thing he’s ever gotten was a parking ticket for letting the time meter run out while he was visiting me in the hospital one time.”

“No way,” Cisco protests. “I saw the stories online – he’s got a record a mile long, only he deleted it all –”

“Those are just stories,” Iris says. “I helped spread some of them.”

“Iris, you didn’t,” Len says.

“Oh, good, he’s starting to come out of it.”

“You’re not a criminal?” Mick says slowly. “Not at all?”

“I wanted to be a supervillain,” Len says. He’s tired and his head hurts and he thinks he may have hurt Mick’s feelings somehow, even though he never lied about anything. He should have been more clear, he guesses. “Childhood dream. Had to put it aside to take care of Lisa. Then, when the Flash appeared…I figured it was time.”

“You steal diamonds all the time!” Cisco shouts.

“Yeah,” Len says. “And I send ‘em back after with comments on improving their security against metahuman and super-threats. I get paid an average of 50k per successful robbery, which is honestly more than I’d get fencing the diamonds on the black market.”

“What,” Barry says.

“How do you afford that sweet apartment?” Mick demands. “And all the extra cash you always have?”

“Lenny’s partner in a mid-sized architectural design firm,” Lisa says proudly.

“I’m designing a bank right now,” Len offers, closing his eyes.

“You’re designing a bank?”

“I specialize in figuring out architectural design for high security needs,” Len says. “I basically spend all day trying to figure out how to break into places and then turning it around to figure out how to stop people from doing what I just did.”

“You’re in the house all day,” Mick says. He sounds upset. “You don’t, like, go into an office or anything.”

“I’m a partner,” Len says, leaning his head against the wall. “I took flex-time leave; I work from home now. Telecommuting. You see me skype with my employees sometimes.”

“Wait – the guys you’re always yelling about banks with are your employees?” Mick says.

“Imagine having Captain Cold as a boss,” Cisco says, marveling.

“You’re basically a normal person,” Barry says, sounding horrified.

“Yes, and he just had a very traumatic experience,” Iris says. “So stop badgering him.”

“He killed someone!”

“He killed his abusive father, who just put a bomb into his sister’s neck!” Iris shouts. “Maybe if you actually cared about your family, you’d pay some attention to that!”

“I do care!” Barry shouts back. “That’s why I lied!”

“Because you don’t trust me!”

“No! Because I want to keep you safe! Damnit, Iris, I thought I was doing the right thing!”

“Well you weren’t! You were just being selfish, like you always are!”

Len pulls up his knees, feeling very small. He hates it when people yell.

He feels Mick’s arm wrap around him and he lets his head fall into Mick’s shoulder. “M’sorry I didn’t make it clear,” he mutters into Mick’s neck. “Shoulda said. Like Iris and Barry. But you only wanted a partner in crime, and I wanted you…”

“We’re still partners in crime,” Mick says. His voice is low and harsh as always, but it’s still the sweetest thing Len’s ever heard. “You’re still a supervillain, remember? Leader of the Rogues.”

“You don’t mind that I’m not a proper criminal?”

“You’re a proper criminal to me,” Mick assures him.

Lisa puts her fingers to her mouth and whistles a sharp, piercing whistle that deafens the entire room.

“You’re all being stupid!” she roars, making everyone take at least three steps back. “Iris, Barry was being a dumbass, but he meant well and he’s apologized. Get over it. Barry, all Iris wants is for you to say you’ve learned your lesson, you’re sorry, and that you’re never going to hide anything from her ever again.”

They blink.

“Now.”

“I’m sorry, I’ve learned my lesson, I will hide nothing from you ever again,” Barry says quickly.

“Apology accepted and I’m sorry for what I said about you not caring about family,” Iris says, equally quickly. “I know that you care a lot and it was really uncalled for.”

“It’s fine, I understand why you were upset,” Barry says.

“Don’t try to get me to make up with my dad, though, I’m still pissed at him,” she warns.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Barry says.

“You’re literally thinking of ways to do it right now.”

“Yes,” Barry says, nodding. “In the spirit of not hiding things from you: yes, yes I am.”

“Can we stop apologizing now or will you kill us?” Iris asks Lisa.

Lisa crosses her arm and surveys both of them. “Fine,” she says. “Acceptable. Also, while we’re at it, Cisco, we’re going out for dinner tomorrow. 8 PM. Wear something nice.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Cisco says. His eyes are shining. “Wait, if he’s a structural engineer, does that mean you’re really a mechanical engineer?”

“Yep,” she says.

“Awesome,” he says.

“Hey, Flash,” Mick says. “Help me get Len home? I think he needs some peace and quiet, maybe some hot cocoa.”

“With mini-marshmallows?” Len asks plaintively.

“Of course,” Mick assures him. “Flash?”

“Uh, sure,” Barry says. “I’ll…do you have to be a supervillain?”

“I keep my Rogues obeying the rules we made,” Len points out. “I make sure nothing really gets stolen, or at least that no one gets hurt by it. If any new supervillain comes to town, they’ll probably come to try to recruit me first. My contacts on the police force help me turn in the really bad guys –”

“Who do we know who’s on the police force?” Mick asks.

“Patty.”

“Patty?” Barry yelps. “My girlfriend?”

“Your what?!” Iris says, starting to grin.

“Well, I mean, I just asked her out yesterday…”

“Patty,” Mick says. “Patty. Instagram girl.”

“Yep.”

“The police really take all types,” Mick says. “Who’d you get arrested? Anyone I know?”

“The two assholes that were making fun of you in the bar.”

Mick’s lips twitch with amusement. “You mean the ones I beat up for doing it?”

“Doesn’t mean they should be doing it. Mental illness isn’t funny.”

Mick shakes his head and pulls Len close, running his fingers through his hair. Len sighs and lets his shoulder slump.

What a bad week.

“We’re not allowed to have weeks like this ever again,” he says, only half-awake at this point.

“Sure thing, Lenny,” Mick says. “Now go to sleep; I’ll yell at you tomorrow. First kill’s always the hardest, especially if it’s family. Took me ages to get over my family dying in a fire, and that was an accident.”

“You’re the best,” Len slurs.

“I beat up nice structural engineers who were abused as children and mentally ill people with tragic pasts,” Barry moans. “What sort of hero am I?”

“Barry, I know we’ve made up and all, but I have to say that your existential crisis is giving me life right now,” Iris says.

“Yeah, yeah – wait, what are you doing? Are you texting someone?”

“I’m live-blogging this for the Rogues. Obviously.”

“You’re what?!”

#my fic #dccoldwave #leonard snart #mick rory #iris west #goldenvibe #goldennews #other background pairings #lots of friendships

33 notes · View notes