#i have discovered pink is so incredibly hard to make look natural but the vibes of cherry trees are unmatched

[the-sunshine-dims]

A sense of calm

#i have discovered pink is so incredibly hard to make look natural but the vibes of cherry trees are unmatched #bound smp #rune ventura #vast cadere #fin draws

[chickensarentcheap]

Never Gonna Be Alone - Chapter 36

Title: Empty

Warnings: profanity, some angst

Tagging: @innerpaperexpertcloud, @c-a-v-a-l-r-y, @tragiclyhip, @miss-smutty, @alievans007​

He watches her as she stands in front of the Christmas tree; countless strings of light bathing pale, smooth skin in a multicoloured glow. She’s at her most beautiful during moments like this; enjoying silence and the relief and relaxation that comes with a warm and comfy house, clad in an oversized plaid nightshirt and her hair slightly damp from a much needed and deserved soak in the tub. She’s always been naturally beautiful; appearing much younger than her actual age and make up only taking away from her features instead of accenting or showcasing them. She’d been perfectly at home in Australia right from the start and had easily adapted to -and adopted- the casual ‘beach’ vibe; constantly bare foot and clad in tanks and shorts with wind swept hair and sun kissed cheeks and the hint of salt lingering on her skin.

While she’d been breathtaking from the very moment he’d laid eyes on her, she’s only become even more so over the years; his love for her growing with each passing day and bringing with it a new found wonderment for every inch of her. Body thicker now; cheeks rounder, breasts fuller, hips wider and curves in all the right places. It’s an appreciation made stronger by not only a strong and seemingly unbreakable bond, but a friendship as well; his truest and most loyal confidant and the keeper of his deepest and darkest secrets and his biggest and most fervent supporter. And the mother of his children. Willingly giving him the large brood that he so desperately had graved; selflessly sacrificing her own body and allowing it to become a safe haven for all the incredible little human beings that would grow and thrive inside of her. Watching someone grow bigger with your child and then become a mother brings on a whole new level of adoration and respect; putting them even higher on the pedestal that you long ago constructed for them.

Her body sways from side to side; slowly and rhythmically in an attempt to keep Tabby quiet and content. The baby had spent the better part of an hour extremely unsettled; fussy and irritable as she continued to fight sleep without the comfort of either parent. They’d offered to keep both children and Ovi and Riya had jumped at the chance; planning on coffee and dessert at an all night cafe close to their home in Queens. With two little ones and his hectic and overwhelming schedule at the hospital, it makes it nearly impossible for them to get any alone time together; much needed considering the several months of non stop wedding planning and the stress and headaches that had accompanied it. Ovi would return for his daughters -and for breakfast with the family- in the morning; Tabby accompanying him and Tanner to the American Museum of Natural History while Micki got to enjoy time with grandpa and lunch and a shopping spree at the American Doll store.

The time together as a family is rare; thousands of miles and a handful of different time zones separating them. Moving to New York City simply out of the question; neither Tyler or any of the kids fully able to get comfortable and happy in a much bigger and chaotic place. Australia is where their hearts are; their dream home tucked away at the end of a gravel street and accompanied by acres of both forest and beach. It’s quiet and it’s relatively secluded; giving him the privacy that he craves and the sense of the security that he needs in regards to his family. And while Esme had spent years living in the Big Apple and had loved her time there and once dreamed endlessly about going back and finding an area to settle down in, those feelings have long dissipated. Content with simply visiting a handful of times throughout the year; getting to experience the different seasons and enjoying the magic of a white Christmas and loving the convenience of being somewhere so vast and populated.

He had mentioned it a time or two; perhaps moving back to the States and calling the brownstone their permanent residence while using their home in Cooktown as their ‘getaway’ spot. But she’d vehemently argued against it; not keen on the idea of permanently living in her country of origin. Her happiness and her own sense of peace long ago settled Down Under; falling in love with the people and experiencing genuine awe and wonderment with every stunning sunset and brilliant sunrise. It’s where her heart is. Where it always HAS been. She left it behind years ago when they’d been forced to flee; her happiness lingering in that little two bedroom apartment that they’d called home. It hadn’t been much; the rooms shockingly small and filled with second hand furniture. But it’s where their love for each other had been fully discovered; getting to know each other -outside of sex- while he recovered from the wounds suffered in Dhaka and she’d been growing and nurturing their child inside of her.

Most of all, he’d enjoyed having her -the love of his life- in his homeland; marvelling at how she so effortlessly blended in, proud of how not only the locals so willingly and easily accepting and falling in love with her, but how she handled being thousands of miles away from her own home. Although he was -and still is- notoriously private and withdrawn, she made acquaintances so easily; Aussies quickly drawn to that bubbly personality and that cheerful and positive outlook on life despite everything she’d been through. She’d taken the place by storm; falling in love with her new life and thriving in the environment and getting up every day ready to tackle the mountain of change just dropped into her lap. Her dreams still haunted by what had taken place in Bangladesh, but her heart still so open and accepting; taking every opportunity to explore everything around her and quickly returning to loving life and everything in it. And even on the hardest of days, she’d never fail to make him smile. The way she’d giggle when learning all the slang words or how her nose would crinkle in disgust and she’d give a long, drawn out ‘ewwww’ whenever he attempted to turn her into a Vegemite lover. The fascination in her eyes whenever they’d hit up a zoo or a wildlife reserve and she’d get to come face to face with some of Australia’s most famous of creatures; crying when she got to hold an orphaned koala and then staring in absolute amazement when a kangaroo Joey hopped over and ate goodies straight out of her hand. Even at the beach she was like a little kid on Christmas morning; not quite enjoying the feeling of the sand between her toes, but marvelling at the expanse of the ocean and the way the sunlight sparkled on the water.

Even now she remains in awe of the life she’d been given; he still sees that disbelief that captures her face during a particularly stunning sunset. Mesmerized -and even moved to tears- by the colours; vivid shades of purple, pink and orange. Always expressing how grateful she is. In awe that she’d been given such an amazing opportunity; an incredible life in a beautiful place with someone that loves and worships her and children that absolutely adore her.

He doesn’t speak as he joins her; placing both hands on her shoulders and pressing a kiss to the back of her head. He savours the moment. Eyes closed and his palms running up and down her arms; face buried in her hair as he deeply inhales the familiar yet still alluring scent that clings to those dark, damp tresses. And with a peck to the cheek he steps alongside of her; hand moving to her shoulder as he tucks her tightly into her side.

“She okay?”

Esme nods, then smiles down at the little one resting along her arm. Still fighting sleep but quiet and content; snuggled tightly into her grandmother’s chest and wrapped tightly in Addie’s well loved blanket. “She is now. You just had a bit of a hard time, didn’t you Tabby. You were just missing momma.”

He moves his hand down and settles it on her hip. Reaching across her with the other, a callused palm rests gently on the top of the baby’s head; his thumb smoothly and repeatedly brushing against her brow. Tabby gives a content sigh and long yawn in response; enormous brown eyes -constantly fluttering as they continue their valiant battle to stay open- staring up at him.

Esme tugs the faded and tattered blanket upwards, smoothing it around Tabby's tiny body.

“Everyone asleep?”

“The oldest are still awake. I told them to keep it down. So they wouldn’t wake the littles up. I might have threatened them a couple times; told them I’d take their tablets away AND throw them...the kids...not the iPads...out into the snow.”

“Might work for a little bit. I think they’re used to you by now ; they know daddy is full of empty threats.”

“Guess it will really shock the shit out of them when I finally do act on it and out they go.”

“I’ll see it when I believe it. I’ll probably be the one that snaps first and DOES offer them as sacrifices to the sharks.”

“That threat held in there longer than I thought it would. We still have three that fall for it.”

“Let’s hope it continues for a little while more. She’s perfect, isn’t she?” Esme muses, beaming down at the baby and then up at him. “Absolutely perfect.”

“She is,” he agrees, and places a lingering kiss to his wife’s temple.

“And so beautiful,” she looks down at their granddaughter once more. “Just like her mommy.”

“And like her grandma.”

She gives a quiet laugh and looks up at him. It’s always there; all that love and adoration and pride that she possesses for him. It never fails to make his breath catch; overwhelmed by the amount of blind faith and trust that she holds for him. “As much as I appreciate you feeding my ego, that compliment would only work if we were biologically related.”

“Doesn’t matter, babe. You’re beautiful. And I love you. So fucking much.”

“Christmas time always gets you right in the feels, doesn’t it,” she teases, and then moves to stand in front of him; body pressed tightly into his and the back of her head resting against his chest.

“Not just Christmas lately. A lot of things, it seems.”

“I like it. When you’re sweet and sappy.” She tilts her head back to look up at him, a soft smile curving her lips. “And adorable.”

“You know, I SHOULD divorce you for that. Of all the insults you’ve hurled at me…”

“I swear you’d rather me call you a dick head or a shit for brains. Accept it, you’re adorable. You will never, EVER, change my mind. And divorce me? You’d never. You’d miss me way too much. You’d miss me and all my bullshit.”

“I actually would. Would you miss mine? All my crap?”

“I don’t know about that. You CAN be really tiring.”

He frowns.

“I’m kidding. I would take every single ounce of your bullshit over not having you around. You’re relatively tame, considering. Everything you've been through? All the shit handed to you since you were a kid? You could be A LOT worse.”

“That’s a compliment, yeah? I THINK that’s a compliment.”

“It definitely is. When I think about what you've been through? From the time you were little until now? It’s remarkable. That you’re as normal and sane as you are.”

Smirking, he leans down to press a kiss to the tip of her nose. “Did you really put me and normal and sane in the same sentence?”

“Considering what your father did to you, being in the army and out there in war zones, AND being a mercenary? Babe, you’re lucky to be how you are. You realize that, right? That you could be SO much worse. You could have totally gone in another direction; when it comes to your personal life. You could have easily turned out violent and aggressive and a complete prick. You know how many times I saw that? You know how many mercenaries I came in contact that were horrible, horrible people? Ninety nine percent of them. You? You were...ARE...a total study in contradiction.”

“I guess I never thought about it that way. How much worse things could be. I could be.”

“You could have turned out to be the worst case scenario. You could have been one those that actually LOVED killing other people. Just thrived and got off on the violence and the bloodshed. You could have turned out to be like Gaspar.”

“That’s a little...unsettling.”

“Right? He was nuts. A total sociopath. Look how quick he was to backstab you! Someone he’d known for years! Someone who’d saved his life! He was ready to kill you. To get to me and Ovi. All because you WEREN’T like him. And don’t even get me started on that whole killing doves thing. DOVES. The bird of peace! What the hell kind of person kills THEM?”

“A pretty messed up one.”

“My point exactly. He WAS messed up. Huge. And you could have so easily gone that way. Especially hanging around him. Having him for a friend? That could have been bad news.”

“First off, he wasn’t really what I’d call a friend. It's not like I saw him outside of work. I never visited him, he never visited me, we never talked on the phone or texted or anything like that. Any interaction I had with him was done on the job. And when I WAS around him? I was drunk. That’s what we had in common. Getting wasted.”

“The way he acted and the way he talked, you would have thought you’d been friends since the two of you were in diapers. I still can’t believe he screwed you like he did. You SAVED his ass. And that’s how repays you? Like what the hell?”

“Babe, it’s a long time ago. And yeah, it sucks. It was a bitch move on his part. But I was never, EVER, going to go along with what he wanted.”

“I only asked that once. Five years ago. If you even considered it for a second. I never meant to suggest you were that person Tyler. And I still feel like shit for that. I never meant to hurt you. And I know what I said did. And I’m still sorry I ever said it.”

“Trust me, there’s a long list of things I’m sorry for. Things that I kick myself in the ass for every day. I regret EVER taking you and the kid there.”

“You were just doing what you thought was best. We didn’t really have options, did we. There was really nowhere else for us to go. No way you could have known what he was going to do. It’s not your fault, Tyler. The way things ended up. I’ve never blamed you for any of it.”

“I know.” Curling his arm around her waist, he drops a kiss on the top of her head. “Let’s stop this where it is, yeah? There’s no need to talk about it. It was thirteen years ago almost. And I know you’re still pissed and you’re having a hard time getting over some of the stuff that happened. I get it. There’s still shit that bothers me. But can we at least let it lie for now? Until we get home? And bring this all up at therapy? That’s the place it needs to be brought up, don’t you think?”

“You’re right. This is definitely not the place and certainly not the time. Not when I’ve got this little sweetie with me.” She smiles down at the baby in her arms; body commencing its slow and smooth swaying. And she places a hand on Tabby’s stomach; all five fingers immediately curling around one of hers. “He did good, huh? Ovi?”

Tightening his hold on her, he rests his chin on the top of her head. “He did real good. He’s come a long way that’s for sure.”

“He really has. He’s a man now. With his own family. He’s going to be a DOCTOR. Sometimes it seems like just yesterday; trying to keep him calm in that factory in Dhaka. Now he’s living in Queens and he’s got a soon to be wife and two beautiful little girls. How did that happen? How did he grow up so fast? It’s like I blinked and he went from boy to man.”

“It’s been almost thirteen years, Me. As hard as that is to believe. And a lot’s happened in that thirteen years.”

“You’re not kidding me. If someone had told me, when I walked out of your place, that you were going to go from being my fake husband to my real one? I would have told them they were nuts. That was so not on my radar; getting into a serious relationship, never mind MARRYING someone.”

He nuzzles the tip of his nose against her ear, then presses a kiss to the lobe. “I knew it. You really did just want me for my body. Sex. That’s all I was to you. A piece of ass.”

“Maybe at first,” she admits, and then giggles when he playfully nips at the side of her neck. “But somewhere between the third and sixth orgasm, I realized that hey, maybe there IS something to be had out of all this.”

“So basically you came to that on the first day. Because if I do remember correctly, we didn’t just get down to business once. And you were on your fifth orgasm by the second round, so…”

“I realized very quickly that there was something different about you. Something that you didn’t let many people see. You weren’t like anyone I’d ever met on the job. Especially other mercenaries. You were special, Tyler Rake. I recognized that pretty early on.”

“Man, your standards really WERE low.”

“My standards happened to be very high, thank you very much. Which is why I went on my eighteen month sexual sabbatical after Mark. So what does that tell you? You had to do something awesome to get me to break. And you broke me right quick, let me tell you. I actually thought maybe you would break me a couple times, actually. Physically speaking.”

“You shocked me. That someone so tiny could take so much. From a guy so much bigger. You weren’t scared? Not once? Not even when I grabbed you by the neck?”

“Nope. I’ve never had a reason to be scared of you. Not even back then. I saw it in your eyes; you weren’t trying to hurt me. You were trying to protect yourself. You didn’t want me getting too close. And you didn’t want to feel anything. YOU were the one that was scared..”

“I was,” he admits. “It scared the hell out of me. That I WAS feeling things for you. Especially that quick. I never thought it was possible. To be that into someone so fast. Always thought was bullshit when I heard people talk about it. Then I met you. All five foot nothing and a buck twenty soaking wet. And boy did you turn my world upside down.”

She smiles and turns her face into his, tip of her nose pressed into the side of his. “In all the best ways though, right?”

“Nothing but the best, Me. Smartest thing I ever did? Agree to that job.”

“I told Ovi the same thing tonight. That it was the smartest decision I’ve ever made. I mean, it was crazy and it was weird and it was twisted, but it led me somewhere...and to SOMEONE...so beautiful and amazing. I don’t regret a single second, Tyler. Or any of the decisions I made. It was the best thing I ever did. YOU’RE the best thing I ever did.”

A grin tugs at the corners of his mouth. “Are we talking just sexually or…?”

She laughs. “You totally blew it out of the water. Sexually speaking. And you continue to you ALL the time. But I mean in EVERY way. You’re everything I could have ever asked for. In a best friend, a partner, a husband, a baby daddy. You just came into my life and everything changed. I changed. It’s all been worth it. Even the bad times.”

“You know how you always say I have a habit of making you cry at the holidays? You're giving me a run for my money.”

“Even men deserve to hear all that mushy stuff. No matter how big and strong and how bad ass they are. And you, husband, re very big and strong and bad ass. And I love every damn inch of you.”

“Baby, I love you.” Tears sparkle in his eyes as he presses a kiss to the bridge of his nose. “And thank you; I DID need to hear all that.”

“I should tell you more often. And I would. If I wasn’t afraid your head would get too big to fit through the door.”

“Always following up the corny shit with some shitty, smart ass comment. That’s my girl,” He slides his hand under the bottom of his shirt and traces a fingertip around her navel; chuckling when she shivers against him and shoves his hand away.

For several minutes they stand in silence; his arm once more wrapped tightly around her waist and her head resting back against his chest. Both watching the child being rocked in her arms, his hand seemingly even larger and more powerful as it rests upon the baby’s coal black hair; thumb continuing to brush across her forehead.

“Look at the way she watches you.” Esme says. “Look how big her eyes are. How they’re sparkling. What is what with you and babies? They always love you. Our babies could NEVER get enough of you.”

“I don’t know. Voice, maybe?”

“Could be. When you’re not pissed off about something and you’re totally relaxed and comfortable, it’s so deep and so soothing. Soft, even. I used to think about that all the time in Dhaka; how your voice would seem so different when we were in bed together and having those late night chats. YOU’D seem different, actually. You were so calm and you completely let your guard down and you were so...I don’t know...different. You weren’t the guy you were when we were out on the street. Not that there was anything wrong with THAT guy. That guy was insanely sexy and man, could rail me like no other. Just the other guy? The calmer one? He really set the bar high.”

“And now?”

“You’re still him. You’re still Tyler. You still have all the different sides and I still love them. I love them more and more every day.”

“How much have you had to drink tonight? Because I know you can be sappy, but you’re even sappier than usual.”

“I barely had any. I don’t even have the slightest buzz going on. I’m just feeling sentimental, I guess. Seeing how good Ovi is with Riya and the girls and finally coming to terms with him being a daddy and someone’s soon to be husband. It’s just brought up a lot of things. A lot of GOOD things. When it comes to us.”

“Like?”

“Just how we were when we first started out. When we first got married and I was having Millie and we’re living in that little apartment. You were still recovering and still had quite the road ahead of you, but just got your shit together and stood up. You were so good, Tyler. At everything. No matter how much pain you were in or how much you were struggling mentally to get over things. You just shelved your shit so you could be there for me. And our baby.”

“All that mattered to me was you. And our daughter. That’s it.”

“And you showed it. Time and time again. Best damn lamaze partner and labour coach EVER.”

“Even if I almost DID faint?”

“Even then. You were awesome. You were such a good daddy to be. You were so in awe of the whole thing. The way you’d always touch my belly and you’d read surfing magazines to her and you’d go out at three in the morning to get me fast food or ice cream. You never even complained. Well, maybe when you were in the car you did.”

“Honestly? No. I was just so fucking happy to be getting the chance to have another kid that I was enjoying every second. I wasn’t going to take anything for granted. Even middle of the night Maccas runs.”

“I mean it, you know. When I say I couldn’t have asked for a better father for my children. You’ve been incredible. Right from the start. I lucked out, that’s for sure.”

“I don’t know, Me. I think I got you beat in that department. Luck.”

“How about we both agree that we’re lucky? That we BOTH bring some amazing things to the table.”

“I don’t know…”

“We BOTH lucked out. Big time. We definitely both upgraded. From our first marriages.”

“We can definitely agree on that. I certainly made the right decision. When I got up the balls to ask you to marry me. Even if it was in the bathroom.”

“It was perfect. For us.”

“You know what else is perfect? Seeing you with her. Our granddaughter. Makes me think of all the times with our babies. Watching you with them. Thinking how beautiful it was. Being just so in awe of you. Is it wrong I kind of miss it? You with a baby? Even you pregnant?”

“No,” she shakes her head. “Not wrong at all. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss it. I mean, I always had issues, but I actually liked being pregnant. I liked watching my body change; my hair thickening and darkening and my boobs and my butt getting bigger.”

He grins and pecks her ear. “That last part was DEFINITELY my favourite.”

“And feeling them move inside of me. I didn’t matter how many times I went through it; it was always so amazing and beautiful to feel them. And you’d always get that dorky smile. That one that’s reserved solely for expectant dads. The one that says ‘hey, look what I did!’. You know, I should have had a t-shirt made for you. With those words on it. And an arrow pointing at my belly.”

“I would have worn it, too. Like I wear that Super Sperm every now and then.”

“I can NOT believe you do that,” she laughs. “It was meant as a joke. Not for you to wear it and be proud of it!”

“But I am proud of it. Of my accomplishment. I knocked you up FIVE times. A total of SEVEN babies. That’s some fucking skill, Me.”

“I don’t know if your boys are skilled or just plain lucky, but I’ll let you have it. Your pride in your handiwork. Congratulations, honey. You came inside of me. Quite the feat.”

“Listen smart ass,” he playfully pinches the sensitive area below her right rib cage. “Can’t you just let me have this? Can’t I have my moment? Those kids are the best thing I’ve ever done. Other than their mum, of course. She’s my favourite thing I’ve ever done.”

“You never miss the opportunity to be dirty do you. I do miss it, you know. Being pregnant, having a baby in the house. It’s kind of bittersweet; knowing it won’t happen again. I spent the better part of seven years pregnant. Starting with Millie and ending with the twins. We had seven kids in a VERY short period of time. It’s kinda hard to get used to; not having an infant or two around.”

“I mean, it COULD happen. We could both get things reversed and just hope for the best.”

“I don’t know if I can do it. If my body can even handle that. I think I’m babied out. As sad as that makes me to admit.”

“We could get a surrogate.”

“That’s a no from me. I know it’s an amazing thing and I admire the women who do it. I really do. But I do NOT like the idea of you having a baby with another woman.”

“You realize I don’t actually get to fuck them, right? I don’t get to actually enjoy the baby making process?”

“Of course I realize that. I just don’t like that idea. I’m not comfortable with it. Your sperm in someone else. Even if it WAS put there by a turkey baster.”

“A turkey baster?” He chuckles. “Is that seriously how it’s done? I do my thing into a cup and…?”

“I don’t know. Something like that I guess. I just can’t deal with that. The thought of your stuff inside of some other woman. Sounds stupid, right? Tell me it’s stupid. That I’m being totally irrational.”

“Actually, I get it. I understand where you’re coming from. If I couldn’t pitch in, I wouldn’t want some guy’s sperm being put into you.”

“Oh it wouldn’t just be put in me. I’d totally sleep with him.”

Tyler scowls. “Excuse me?”

“I’m kidding! You know I’m kidding! Baby, there is no other guy in this world I want to sleep with. You’re the only one I want to do those things with. Why turn around and settle for less when I already have the best? When I’m already married to someone that’s walking sex. A God among men. Only you, Tae. You’re the only one I want to sleep with.”

“Yeah?” He presses a series of kisses along the outer edge of her hair, followed by the length of her jaw. “You want to sleep with me tonight?”

She grins, then sighs when his teeth nip at the side of her throat. “I want to do A LOT of things with you tonight.”

“Oh really? Well in that case…” he places a kiss on her temple, lips lingering as his hand once more slips up the front of her shirt; fingertips grazing along the smooth skin just above the waistband of her pyjama pants. “...maybe we should close the house up for the night and go upstairs.”

“I think that’s a very good idea. Tell you what, I’ll lock everything up and set the alarms. You take your granddaughter and put her to bed. I already set the playpen up for her. In the den.”

“You already have her. Why don’t you do it?”

“Because you have a knack of getting babies off to sleep. You’re a natural. And besides, you doing the whole big, strong man with a baby thing? It totally turns me on.”

“Why didn’t you just say that in the first place?” He gently and carefully removes the baby from her arms. Holding Tabby tightly to his chest; a forearm under her bum and a hand on the back of her head.

“Very nice,” Esme enthuses. “Is it wrong that I’m wet for you already?”

He leans in to kiss her. “You’re dirty.”

She lays a hand on the side of his face, and kisses him eagerly in return, pausing when she giggles into his mouth. “You have that effect on me.”

******

“Adoption.”

His voice rumbles deep in his chest; reverberating against her back and tearing her away from the edge of sleep. Their love making had been a welcome change from the nights past. A bruising and punishing pace exchanged for something much slower and attentive; slow, deep thrusts that kept her whimpering in delight and her nails clawing at his back shoulders. Long and languid kisses; little pecks interspersed with the movement of closed mouth upon closed and followed by greedy yet explorative tongues. The degrading names and the filthy words replaced by whispered praises and declarations of love; her cheek cradled in the palm of his hand as he gazed down at her with so much admiration and adoration that it both brought tears to her eyes and took her breath away.

She’d been enjoying the sensation of his naked and sweat slicked body pressed against hers. Her back against the muscled and solid expanse of his chest and one of his thighs wedged between both of hers; a forearm stretched across her pillow and her head resting in the crook of his elbow. A large, strong hand hovering near her stomach; calloused fingertips tracing slow and intricate patterns on the skin. Her body completely sated and so relaxed and secure in his arms that sleep had come on quickly; encouraged by the soft breath that tickled the back of her neck and fluttered her hair.

“It’s what we should do,” he continues, as his index finger draws continuous circles around her navel. “Adopt.”

“Are you seriously back to thinking about that?

“Back to thinking about it? I haven’t STOPPED thinking about it.”

Esme frowns. “You were thinking about adoption while we were…?”

“Not WHILE we were. I did stop for THAT. I do have to concentrate more now, you know. I’m getting old.”

“Oh please…” Esme rolls her eyes. “...how many times have we had sex? In almost thirteen years? You could be fully comatose and still get things done. Muscle memory and all that. And you are NOT getting old. What’s the saying ? You’re only as old as you feel?”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better? ‘Cause I feel like I’m ninety.”

“You have just as much stamina and enthusiasm now as you did when we met. If not MORE. You’re hardly getting old. What’s gotten into you lately? You’ve been talking about the weirdest things. Getting married again, having another baby, adopting a kid. Are you okay, honey? You don’t seem okay.”

“I’m pretty far from okay. I thought we established that a few days ago.”

“OTHER than that. What’s going on with you?”

“Nothing. Nothing is going on with me. It’s just things I’ve been thinking about. Things I want to do. With you.”

She rolls over onto her other side, settling her head on his bicep as she faces him. “Are you going through a midlife crisis? Is that what’s going on here? Last month, you went and got a motorcycle after I finally caved. You went back out into the field. You’ve started talking about wanting to renew our vows and how we could get things reversed and have another baby. Now you’re onto adoption. Is that what all this is? A midlife crisis?”

“No. It’s not. No one lives to be ninety four.”

“A LOT of people live to be ninety four, thank you very much.”

“Well I hate to break it to you, but I won’t be one of them. And nothing’s gotten into me and I’m not going through any kind of crisis. It’s just things that I have on my mind. That I’d like to do with you.”

“Well the baby thing is off the list. I can’t go through the whole process of having things reversed and MAYBE getting pregnant. There’s no guarantee I would and I honestly don’t think my body can handle it again. I had problems with EVERY pregnancy. And each time things got worse and worse. Do we really want to take that chance? That I do get pregnant and something horrible goes wrong?”

“Nothing went wrong with Takota and Brookie. It was the best pregnancy you had. I mean, you had the cramping and the bleeding in the first three months, but after that…”

“They each weighed eight pounds. Or close to it. They were BIG babies for twins. Do you want to take that chance again? That we’d have another set?”

“I highly doubt we would. That seems pretty unlikely.”

“We thought having a second set would be unlikely. But it happened. I had all kinds of problems with Addie; I almost lost her twice and she was early and so tiny when she finally came. I gave birth to Declan on our living room floor. And don’t get me started about TJ and Tanner. Because that was a nightmare. I can’t do it again, Tyler. I just can’t. I can’t put myself through that; procedures to reverse everything and then getting pregnant and something going wrong. I just can’t.”

“Okay, so we don’t go that way. We adopt. It’s not like we can’t afford it.”

“What is going on with you? I used to think it was a breeding kink. And I was more than happy to go along with it and I figured you’d just grow out of it. Now I’m starting to think it’s something more than that. What is your issue? About needing so many offspring? How come every time we agree to stop, you change your mind a few months or a couple years later?”

“I don’t HAVE an issue. Maybe I just like having kids with you. Having a big family. What’s wrong with that? It’s what we wanted, isn’t it? What we agreed on.”

“We agreed on three. Then you changed your mind and talked me into it and we settled on four. I lost one and then we split up and one of our little hookups ending up with me getting pregnant with Declan. He was supposed to be the last. That was it.. And low and behold…”

“I changed my mind and we had Addie.”

“And then Kota and Brookie. Even though we BOTH swore up and down that Peanut would be very last. You even went and got a vasectomy. Didn’t exactly work, did it.”

“That was totally my fault and I owned it.”

“We have our big family. Way bigger than either of us really ever planned on. And now you’re talking about more? This is when we’re supposed to start really enjoying each other. All of our kids are in school; we have the entire house to ourselves. We should be capitalizing on that. Going places together; out to lunch or taking those road trips we like we used to or even spending time on the beach. You can try to teach me to surf. AGAIN. Now that you’re home more…”

“That’s just it, Me. I’M home more. Not you. Me. I spend ninety nine percent of my time working from home. That’s what YOU wanted. You didn’t want me going out anymore; you wanted me home and running the business and not going out there and getting my hands dirty. I gave you what you wanted, didn’t I?”

She frowns. “I thought we both wanted that. We AGREED on it. You even said yourself that it was the best decision you could have made. Considering how long you had to rehab for and the little setbacks and the complications and having to get your knee redone. You admitted that you would never have been able to go back out. At least not at the frequency and the pace you were used to.”

“I did. I DID say that. And I meant it. I CAN’T keep going the way I was. I’m nowhere near the same guy I was thirteen years ago. Or even five years ago; before Nathan got his fucking hands on me. I CAN’T do it anymore; not full time anyway. My body can’t take it. Neither can my brain. And that’s the one I worry about the most.”

It’s a bitter pill to swallow: admitting aloud that you’re nowhere near the person you’d been not even a decade ago. That you just don’t have it in you anymore; physical and mental exhaustion finally getting the better of you. And he is better behind the scenes; he enjoys running things and being the one to delegate and the guy that others look to for answers and help. But it’s still a kick in the gut. Admitting that you just can’t do it anymore.

“But I thought being home almost all the time meant getting to spend more time with you,” he continues. “That’s what I thought would happen. I thought we WOULD get a chance to enjoy being around one another more. Because you know what? I genuinely like being around you. I WANT to be around you. I want us to go places together and do things with one another. And that’s not what happened, did it. When I agreed to this whole bookstore thing. When I bought you that place.”

It had been a tenth anniversary gift; the purchase of the building and the help of both a contractor and a designer to make her vision -her dream- come to life. And it’s flourished; the locals falling in love with Esme and the business and making it far more successful than she could have ever imagined it would be. And while he’s proud of her and the success that she’s achieved and would never stop supporting her, it has come with its downside. There’s been moments of animosity towards the business itself; never expecting that it would eat up so much time or her time and take her away from him. He'd certainly never expected to miss her THAT much; hating the loneliness of a completely empty house and the mere absence of her voice. And it isn’t so much the intimacy that he longs for. The sex and the moments of more innocent displays of affection; walking along the beach with their arms around each other, the kisses while standing in the surf, holding hands while walking through the town. It’s the friendship. The laughs they have together when he’s attempting -yet again- to teach her surf and the conversations over lunch on the back deck and the road trips they take; either making a picnic the night before or simply grabbing food at a drive thru and then just driving with no set destination. Listening to her singing along to the radio and laughing when she dances in her seat or even letting her talk him into a silly and childish game of ‘eye spy’. And that little shriek and giggle she gives when she sticks her arm out the window; the accompanying breeze both startling her and tickling her skin. He enjoys those moments with her. Not just his wife and the mother of his children, but his best friend. His confidant. His most loyal and steadfast supporter. The keeper of his deepest and darkest secrets.

“I just thought we’d have more time,” he adds. “Together. That me stepping back and being a boss meant that we would get a chance to be with another more. Especially when all the kids ended up in school.”

“And I agreed that I’d cut back. I’ve already adjusted the schedule and everyone has stepped up and are more than willing to take on extra hours. Xavier was more than willing to take on a management role; I gave him more hours, benefits, a business account he can use for meals and gas costs. I’ve already taken care of all of that. Just like you asked me. Like you wanted.”

“I wanted you to want it too. I wanted you to want that time with me.”

“And I DO want that time with you. Have you ever thought maybe I felt being home more somehow hindered you? That maybe I’d be a distraction? That you’d put off work in favor of catering to me? I didn’t want to get in your way, Tyler. I know how important the business is. How well it’s doing. And I didn’t want to feel like I was taking you away from it and making you neglect things.”

“Why didn’t you just TELL me that? Why didn’t you let me know you were feeling that way?”

She shrugs. “I didn’t want to come across as whiny and needy. You’re running a company. A very successful one. I didn’t want to hinder that.”

“Baby, you could never hinder it. Or be a distraction. Well, unless you’re coming into the gym in the middle of a work out and you’re only wearing a bathing suit or a bathrobe with nothing underneath. Then you are DEFINITELY a distraction.”

“I’ve been good lately. I’ve held off. If I’m horny and don’t want to handle things myself, I don’t come in until you’ve got at least an hour and a half in. Isn’t the last thirty minutes to an hour cardio? Well I show up, offer you sex, and then you don’t have to go on the treadmill or the rowing machine or use the assault bike.”

Grinning, he uses two fingertips to clear her hair away from her face , tucking wayward strands behind. “So THAT’S your game plan. You’re an evil genius, you know that?”

“I know how much you hate standard cardio. How the rowing machine makes your back act up and that running on the treadmill bothers your knees. So I figure why not offer myself up? Spare your body any future agony. And if we go really hardcore at it, it’s DEFINITELY better than any other form of cardio out there.”

“You think so do you? Did you read that somewhere? Google it?”

“I DID google. It was actually in a highly respected and esteemed publication, I’ll have you know.”

“Cosmopolitan is NOT a highly respected and esteemed publication. No matter what you think.”

“I don’t know, their sex advice is pretty damn good. I’ve used a few of those things. You never complained, that’s for sure.”

“Which tricks? What did you try on me?”

“I refuse to give away all my secrets. But you enjoyed them. Very much. And sometimes you even ask me to do them again. How long have you been feeling this way? Like I’m neglecting you? Neglecting US?”

“I didn’t say you were neglecting anything.” Combing his fingers through her hair, he cups the back of her head in his palm and places a kiss on her brow. “I just…”

“It’s neglect. Let’s not sugar coat it. I put my business before you. Before us. And I never meant to, Tyler. Other than our children, there is nothing or no one more important than our marriage and you. I just didn’t want to get in your way. Honest. That’s all it was about. I wasn’t staying away because I wanted to. Or because I didn’t want to spend time with you. It was never about that. It was never about you. And I’m sorry. That I made you feel you were being put second. I never meant to make you feel that way.”

“And I never meant to make you feel you were going to get in the way. I didn’t even realize I WAS making you that way. I guess we haven’t made as much progress as we thought. In the past five years.”

“Are you kidding? We are totally different people. Separately AND together. We’re stronger. Our marriage is better. We hardly fight anymore. And when we do it doesn’t get nearly as heated and ugly as it used to. We’re able to calm ourselves down and not let things get out of hand. We HAVE come a long way. And I see that every day. You must see it too.”

“I do. But we still got work to do. We’re still lacking a bit on the whole communication thing.”

“It is one of our weak spots,” she admits. “But we’ll just keep working at it. Reminding ourselves that we can and WILL do better. I don’t want us going back to how we were.”

“Trust me, that is the LAST thing I want. I like where we are now. And I like that we still keep working on things. I’m proud of us, Me. And you. I’m proud of you.”

Smiling, she lays a hand on the side of his face and kisses him; long and soft and sweet. “And you call me sappy. Is that why you got onto this wanting another baby stuff? Because me being pregnant meant I’d be home more?”

“I guess so. I don’t know. Maybe it’s part of it. But there’s more to it. The way I’m feeling. I don’t even know how to describe it. I just know what it feels like.”

“You want to try telling me? What’s going on with you? You know you don’t have to keep this shit from me, right? That you can tell me ANYTHING?”

“I do. I DO know that. But that’s the thing, Me. I want to tell you. I just don’t know how to. Because I can’t even make sense of it. So how are you supposed to?”

“Try me. Just talk. Don’t even think about it. Just say whatever pops into your head.”

“That could be dangerous you know. Aren’t we supposed to be working on me trying to get some of my filter back?”

“Baby, you wouldn’t be you if you had a filter. It’s been almost thirteen years. I’m used to you. Just say whatever you need to say. Nothing could possibly shock me. Or offend me.”

Sighing heavily, he closes his eyes and rests his forehead against hers; fingers buried in her hair and gently kneading at her scalp. She gives him time; patiently waiting for an often confused and muddled mind to not only put the bits and pieces together, but for him to find a way to adequately express them. It’s part of the brain injury; the minutes he’d spent deprived of oxygen when he’d coded twice in the operating room. It brings with it a wide variety of issues that can go radio silent for weeks, months, and sometimes even YEARS at a time; short term memory issues, problems controlling and expressing emotions, lack of impulse control, bouts of confusion and an increased temper and sexual drive. And she knows how frustrating it is for him; those times he struggles to concentrate on even the simplest of tasks and conversations or he forgets what he did half an hour before or can’t recall something she told him ten minutes before leaving the house. And when he takes in another sigh -longer and shakier than the one previous- she pushes her hand into his hair and presses a kiss to the bridge of his nose.

“It’s okay.” Her voice is calm, quiet, and patient. Nails lightly and briefly scratching at the back of his head before her hand moves to the nape of his neck. “Take your time. There’s no rush. I’m not going anywhere, babe.”

She can tell by the way his shoulders tense and his nostrils flare that he’s struggling; desperately trying to piece everything together and express exactly what he’s feeling. And her heart aches for him; this strong, powerful, BEAUTIFUL man continuing to be tortured by a troubled past. He’ll never be able to fully shed the memories of Dhaka; the brain injury and its side effects and the numerous scars permanent reminders of the hell he’d been through.

“You okay?” Her hand once more moves back into his hair, gently tugging at the longer strands. “You doing alright?”

Nodding, he clears his throat noisily and opens his eyes. “I love you. And my kids. So fucking much.”

“I know you do, Tyler. I never doubt that.”

“I need you to hear it. I need you to KNOW it. Because I don’t want you taking what I say next out of context. Because it’s probably not going to come out the way I want it to. The way I MEAN it to.”

“I know you love us. I’ve never once doubted that. Just say what you have to say. No getting upset, no judging you, no taking offence. I promise. Just tell me.”

“When I met you, I had nothing. Inside of me. I was empty. And you came along and you filled most of that up. Very quickly. And then we had Millie and we started having more kids and adding to our family and each time we did, more and more places inside of me started filling up. Am I making any sense? I hope this is making sense.”

“It is,” Esme assures him. “Total sense.”

“And it should be completely filled, yeah? That emptiness? You’d think between you and seven kids and the fact we have this incredible life and all this money and two beautiful homes that there’d be nothing left to fill. But there is. And I don’t know why. I don’t know why I can’t fill that last piece. There’s this hole. In my heart. And I can’t find the piece that fits it. No matter how hard I try.”

“So you thought another baby would fill it? Be the answer?”

“A baby of our own, adopting, going back into the field. I guess I thought one of those three would be the answer. That one of them would do the trick.”

“You realize NONE are the answer, right? That none of those things are what you’re really looking for?”

“That’s just it, Me. I don’t know what I’m looking for. But whatever it is, it’s out there but I can’t find it. And I’m not saying this to hurt you or make you feel like you failed in some way. Because you haven’t. It’s not about you. Or our kids. Because I love you; with everything I am and everything I have. None of this is about you.”

“I know. I’m not upset or hurt. I know you love me. You show me and tell me all the time. When did this start? Feeling like this?”

“Couple months ago, I guess. Four at the most.”

“Right around the anniversary of Austin’s death?”

“Yeah...maybe...I don’t know…” The mere mention of his son causes tears to fill his eyes and a lump of emotion to settle in his throat. “...I guess that could have done it.”

“Baby, it’s okay to grieve. It’s okay to still be heartbroken.”

“It’s been seventeen years.”

“There’s no time limit on these things. I still miss my dad. A hell of a lot. Every day something happens where I’m reminded of him. One of the kids will do something and I’ll think about how I wish I could just call him and tell him about it. Or send him pictures of them. Or videos of Millie doing her MMA stuff or TJ scoring goals in lacrosse or Addie at dance recitals in her cute little outfits. It hurts like hell when I realize I can’t share those things with him. When I think about everything he’s missed and how much he’d love those kids. And you. I don’t think it ever really goes away. Grief. I think it’s always there in some way.”

“I just didn’t think it would be this hard. Hurt this much. Especially after so long.”

“You lost a child. A human being that you helped make,” she reasons. “I can’t even bear it when I just think about losing one of mine. So I can’t even begin to imagine what it feels like when it actually HAPPENS. To have to sit there and see your child suffer.”

“But I didn’t sit there,” he reminds her, voice cracking with emotion. “ I took off. I left him there. That was my son. And I LEFT him.”

“You were scared. You were young and you were…”

“I was thirty one years old. I wasn’t a kid. I was a grown ass man. I wasn’t some fucking kid right out of high school. And I wasn’t scared. I was weak. I was a fucking coward and I left him. When he needed me the most. He was sick and he was terrified and I left him.”

“Tyler…” She cradles his face in her hands, thumbs clearing away the tears that slip down his cheeks. “...it’s okay. It’s okay to talk about it and it’s okay to feel the things you’re feeling. But beating yourself up like this? Hating yourself? This isn’t good, babe. You can’t hate yourself forever.”

“You think so? You just watch me.”

“Listen to me,” she pleads, and digs her nails into his face. “You can’t do this. You can’t spend the rest of your life hating yourself. You made a mistake. And yeah, it was a really bad one and I am so fucking sorry that happened to you. That Austin got sick and suffered like he did and that you felt you had no choice but to leave.”

“How can you not hate me? How can you look at me like you do? Why don’t you see me like a monster? Like the huge piece of shit that I am?”

“Because you’re not a piece of shit and you’re not a monster. You’re just a human being that made a bad mistake. I could NEVER hate you. I love you. More than I ever thought I could love someone. And if there was some way I could go back in time and change things and make them better for you, I would.”

“No. Don’t say that. Don’t ever say that. Don’t ever even wish that. Because going back and changing everything would just change everything now. It would mean I’d lose you. And my kids. I loved my son. But I would never bring him back if it meant losing everything I have now.”

She kisses him softly; tasting the salt of his tears as her fingernails lightly drag along the lines of his jaw. “You need closure, Tae. It’s something you’ve never gotten. If you knew where he was…”

“She’d never tell me. Not even seventeen years later. She wouldn’t even tell my lawyer. When we got divorced.”

“Have you tried tracking her down? It’s been a long time. Last time we saw her was thirteen years ago. She may have mellowed. She might be willing to tell you now.”

“I’m not exactly her favourite person, Me. And do you blame her? I didn’t just leave him, I left her too. When she needed me. I know she was a shit wife; constantly fucking other guys when I was away. Sometimes when I was even still in town. But she didn’t deserve that.”

“Do you want me to track her down? I could call or go and visit and ask if she’d…”

“No. That is the last thing I want. I don’t want my past mixing with my present. My future. I appreciate it, Me. And I love you for wanting to do that. For being WILLING to do it. But no good will come of that. You and her meeting up.”

“Is there anything I CAN do? Because I hate that you’re going through this. And I especially hate that you hate yourself. That I can’t take that away. Because you don’t deserve that. That hate. From yourself or anyone else. Tell me what I can do. Please.”

Sniffling noisily, he swipes the back of his hand across his nose. “You can’t fix me, Esme. No matter how much you want to. Or how hard you try.”

“I don’t want to fix you, Tae. I just want to love you.”

The tears immediately return, and when he chokes back a sob she gathers him in her embrace and rolls onto her back. An arm across the middle of his spine and hand moving to the back of his head; fingers tunnelling in his hair as he rests his brow against her chest.

“I don’t deserve that. I don’t deserve YOU.”

“You deserve EVERYTHING. And you’ll never convince me otherwise. Let me love you. That’s all I want. To love you. Can you let me do that?”

Nodding, he slides further down the bed; both arms circling her torso as he buries his face in her stomach.

“It’s going to be okay, Tyler.” Both hands push through his hair; tightly gripping the dirty blond tresses, nails digging into his scalp. “I’ve got you.”

#Tyler Rake #Tyler Rake fan fiction #Extraction fan fiction

[hansolmates]

vernon; get lost in the rhythm of me

Summary: She had less than a month to finish a project she should’ve finished ages ago, and on a whim decides to interview the campus radio show. Little did she know she’d get locked into the Thursday Night Lockdown with a certain campus cutie. Wow I’m sorry I suck at summaries please send help.

Characters: fratboy!Vernon/Original Female + various

Genre: Fluffity fluff (and if you count student stress a lil wittle angst)

Word Count: 5896

01 | 02(?) | 03 (m)(?)

“There’s that dance team that covers songs, you can write about them?”

“I already checked with their e-board, they’re too busy for an interview.”

College Avenue was littered with students after the final 4:10 session, the kids excited for the week to be over as they walked around like busy ants. Despite the nippy weather, Greek Row was still going strong, so strong that we couldn’t get past the student center without hearing the cacophonous noise pollution coming from the different houses. I totally got it though, considering it was a hard week of exams for everyone. It was lucky enough for us to go to a big university where students could cry and party together. A little part of me itched to go grab a drink from one of their coolers, but I promised myself that I couldn’t have fun until I figured out my final project topic for Media Studies. The topic that I was supposed to have down over a month ago.

(Last Tuesday, 4:33:

“I’m doing a compilation on popular YouTube artists,” Joshua informed, taking a long sip of his iced Americano. .

“Ah. Should I get the small or medium?” I asked distractedly, my eyes calculating how much more content I would get in my smoothie if I got the bigger size.

“I’m almost done with my project, maybe you should start soon.” he continued, probably glaring holes into my back because I wasn’t paying the least bit attention to him.

“Do you think I should get extra bananas in my drink? How can you even tell if there’s extra bananas when it’s all mixed up?”

“And I’ve also discovered aliens are real.” Joshua drolled, unamused as he swirled the caramel in his drink. “Their mothership came to my dorm last night, and now I’m pregnant with the Queen’s future heir to the throne. So nice knowing you, I’m glad to have a friend who’s always willing to listen to me!”

Needless to say, I didn’t have my work cut out for me.)

Joshua stopped in his tracks, and by my demise I had to stop in front of him, my neck narrowly missing the sharp corner of his textbook that was sticking out of his backpack. “Did you see that?” he asked, practically pulling my arm from the socket so I’d be right in front of him.

Sigma Tau (notorious for having the prettiest pink house on Row) had a lawn practically spilling with loud students, with equally loud music drowning out their block.

On the makeshift plastic and metal stage, a guy with flowers was on one knee looking like the high heavens as his lips moved in some sort of proposal. The girl who was forcefully dragged up by her sisters looked absolutely mortified, cheeks ruddy, face sunken, and her pale limbs hugged around her t-shirt that was now way too skimpy for her comfort level. The guy was absolutely smug however, looking like he just won a trip to Mars as he practically dipped the rose petals in her palms. But everyone was watching, cooing and making eager, alcohol-laden cries of encouragement, and she had no choice to accept, her face tilted away as she reluctantly grabbed the bouquet.

“Seungcheol is so embarrassing,” Joshua muttered under his breath, pulling them away from the lawn and back onto the sidewalk, “She looks terrified up there.”

I frowned at the childish proposal, watching the couple (?) pull away from the stage and melt between the thick crowd. “I feel bad for her.” I frowned, forcing my gaze to the DJ. The rosy-haired student flipped a switch in his soundboard, and played another upbeat mix, effectively bringing the mood back to a million.

Joshua bobbed his head to the everlasting beat as they walked further away, in that cute non-party boy way that looked more like he was walking down Disney’s Main Street, U.S.A. with birds and sunshine rather than a Thirsty Thursday on campus. “Oh, I got it. What about the radio show?” he suddenly asked, his face glowing with excitement.

“Radio show? Like the campus one?”

“Yeah, there’s one for every day of the week. You can probably go tonight and see if you can snag an interview or something.”  Joshua dragged us to the pizza place by one of the main classroom buildings, the aroma of garlic buttered dough and tomato sauce notifying my empty stomach like lightning.

“The mac n’ cheese pizza looks good,” I murmured, my eyes glazing over the shiny window display.

“Are you paying attention? You should go before their show starts because we have to have our topics before class tonight and—oh shit that does look good. Let's get two slices. With garlic knots.” his large cat eyes widened at the specialty pizza, ready to pull out his wallet. “I can spot you this time.”

Nudging his shoulder with mine I giggled, “You're a lifesaver.”

I blame the food coma from that sinful pizza, because after napping in the dorms it nearly escaped my mind that I was supposed to go to the radio station after class. By napping, I mean sleeping. Missing the first campus bus, it took an extra fifteen minutes to get to the Communications Department. It looked like any other building on campus, faded brick walls which veiled a treasure cove of our student talent. The lights that led to the station upstairs were a dim deep yellow, bathing the atrium that led to a series of dark hallways.

“Excuse me,” I said, careful not to disturb the student in the lobby who was currently alphabetizing records behind their desk. “Are you, DJ Suga?”

Said boy took his sweet ass time to turn around, his glazed eyes giving me a look that wondered why on earth I was here so late. He wore a dark denim jacket with a poorly painted uterus on the back, with a very subtle wording of “fuck the patriarchy” in fine white script. “Yeah, I am.” he said, his pebbly voice wracking my form and waking up all the hairs on my arms. DJ Suga was the de facto head of the campus radio, and at best I hoped he could be a tad less irritable to my outreach. “What of it?”

“I was wondering if I could get an interview with one of your DJs? If there’s time.”

The ebony haired student tilted his head, as if he were momentarily stuck in dreamland, before pulling himself away from his desk. “Let’s see,” he hummed, more to himself as he walked down one of the dark hallways. He returned in a matter of seconds, his petite form looking absurdly high and mighty from his lazy smile, “Sorry, doll.” he murmured, jerking his head back in the hallway. “I got a kid who’s going to be on the air in a few minutes. But I think you’re better off listenin’ to their show before you get the interview, y’know? Feel their vibe.”

My eyes darted to the big digital clock that sat fat in the middle of his desk. 11:52. Wow, I slept longer than I thought. I suddenly felt a little silly, barging in so late with the faintest idea about how to go about this project. With a quick thanks, I hitched my bag above my shoulder, going across the radio floor and to one of the study lobbies. When I made sure I found a nice corner desk where no one would bother me I threw my laptop on and shoved my headphones over my ears, finding the university station. I hoped after coming all this way here in the middle of the night, I could at least try to “feel their vibe.”

Some techy music signaled the start of the show, and to my lack of anticipation the most velvety voice filled my ears, causing my chest to jerk involuntarily.

“What’s up, College Avenue. I’m Vernon and we’re back with The Thursday Night Lockdown.”

His voice was something out of the city and back, with purpose and history. It wasn’t raspy like DJ Suga’s, but it definitely had that low timbre that probably could melt people like butter if he used it right. Adjusting the volume on my laptop, I closed my eyes and let DJ Vernon have his evening.

“I hope you guys submitted those assignments. I’m tellin’ ya freshmen, that 11:59 deadline will close on your ass if you don’t press that red button.” a small smile played on my lips, and I subtly kicked my sneakers under the table, tucking my legs in a comfortable position. I’d imagine Vernon would be just as comfortable, feet on the desk, loose sweats, totally in his element. “I didn’t really have a set plan for tonight, considering it’s midterms and there was a lot of stuff to do this week. I know a lot of us are out drinking their livers out, but for the rest of us I was thinking we could all wind down together. Listen to some playlists, I’ll take some calls and talk about life.”

He talked a little bit about his first playlist, saying it was his favorite cool down mix after a hard day of classes. Everything he said rolled off his tongue like molten chocolate, and I belatedly realized that my fingers curled after every other syllable, his eagerness to spread his enjoyment seeping into my tensed muscles. When his voice faded to silence and soft acoustic music rose, I felt myself momentarily transcend in the surprisingly soothing setlist. I opened up a new tab and started working on some homework, feeling myself get in the zone as I let my mind bounce comfortably between assignments and The Thursday Night Lockdown. This was pretty cool, actually. I never made the time to listen to university shows, but this guy was a natural. Vernon made off-hand comments between songs, reading some comments from their forum page like a conversation with friends or ad-libbing on certain songs. It was a welcoming distraction on particularly rough parts of the work.

“Ah, but one thing that I really need to get off my chest today.” Vernon’s low chuckle rumbled in my ears, “I’m incredibly annoyed at what went down at Sigma Tau today. My boy Coups was brutally rejected for formal on stage this afternoon.”

Shooting up from my nylon seat, its wheels rolled farther from the desk causing my ears to tug painfully from the wire. Pulling myself back to the wooden desk, I furrowed my eyebrows as my focus blurred from my literature paper, concentrating on what Vernon had to say.

“I mean, he did so much for her, Got her flowers, played her favorite song right before he asked, and even got her sisters on it, But once she got off the stage she apparently got so angry, and walked out on him! Seriously?” he scoffed, the once enjoyable sound of his voice feeling like a grating chalkboard forced against my ears. “It was so rude of her, I hope she apologizes to him soon because no one deserves to be treated that way.”

White heat boiled my blood, my jaw pulled so low in shock that it ached. My fingers twitched with a sudden urge to rip at my textbook that I’ve left on the side for the last ten minutes, finally putting it to good use on my sanity.

“Feel free to drop some comments on the forum or shoot me a call, let me know your opinion.”

With pleasure. My fingers typed at lightspeed as I searched up the radio’s number, then with equal pace as I tapped on my cellphone with a bit of unnecessary force with each key. Pulling out one bud, I pressed my cell to my ear. The dial tone was Drake’s Fake Love, which made me even more irritated as I waited for him to pick up.

“And then I was craving—oh, we got our first phone call of the night!” A small, cruel smile nipped on the edge of my lips at Vernon’s innocence as he prepared to pick up. Ripping out the other earbud, I slammed my laptop shut, the lid echoing in the small cubicle. “Good evening, Caller 10.” Vernon sing-songed, “Welcome to The Lockdown. What’s up?”

“Hello, Vernon.” I replied with an equally cheery voice, drumming my nails against the lid of my computer. “I presume you were there when Seungcheol asked that girl to formal?”

“Oh, yeah. Of course I was there.” his voice perked up, probably eager to vent out his frustrations of this afternoon. I was equally armed.

“So I guess you’re blind, then?” I bite, my voice still laced with a sickly positivity.

I felt his breath hitch slightly, probably undetected from the rest of campus listening, but against my ear his surprise was blissfully palpable. “E-excuse me?” he said.

“Because if you had eyes, you would’ve seen how absolutely uncomfortable that poor girl looked on stage. She looked like she was about to cry.” I prayed that the girl from this afternoon wasn’t listening in, and if Seungcheol was supporting his friend like I’d imagine, I hoped he’d feel every ounce of my venom. “How dare you insinuate that girl was wrong. She doesn’t have to apologize, and in fact it’s your friend that should be apologizing.”

“Whoa whoa, hold up Ten.” I blistered at the fact he referred to me as a number, but let it slide considering it was my first time on his line and I was attacking him. “You don’t even know the whole story—”

“Oh, I don’t need to know the whole story to know that your friend is immature and delusional. And so are you, if you think some flowers and a grand confession is any consolation for a date. She had every right to say no.”

“You have no idea,” I felt his voice go dangerously low, like the way a predator would test the waters. Eliciting that sort of reaction from the originally happy Vernon, was satisfying. “How much Coups likes that girl. He would do anything—”

“Bullshit.” I spat, fingers curling around my phone. “If he really liked her, he wouldn’t have put her on the chopping block. He wouldn’t have let her stand on that damn stage, forced to say yes on the spot. She was doing your friend a favor,” I said slowly, my words careful and deliberate. “And made sure she wouldn’t embarrass him like he was embarrassing her.”

I knew Vernon was hanging on a thread, trying to be mighty and defend his friend. Despite my subconscious telling me to let this poor boy off the hook, it’s not my business and it’s his show, I couldn’t let him continue to talk as if he knew everything.

Vernon scoffed, and I could imagine him practically groveling in his studio, grappling for a comeback. “You really think he was trying to hurt her? Coups wouldn’t hurt a fly.” he said.

“Then if it’s not you or me, Seungcheol is the blind one. If you had asked me out on that stage, you better believe I wouldn’t have been as nice to you as she was.”

“Good thing that won’t happen, ever.” Vernon shot back. “I don’t think I’d want to date someone like you.”

Low. Blow. “Excuse me?” I hissed. Screw being quiet in the study room, I got up, smacking my palms against the desk as if Vernon was right in front of me. “You’d be so lucky to date someone like me—”

“Oh!” I heard some rustling, plastic, prickling against my ear. And then the call ended.

Ripping the phone away, I whipped open my laptop and turned on The Lockdown.

“The call dropped.” Vernon’s A-class acting reverberated through my speakers, his candied voice strained with concealed stress. “So, so sorry that happened, Ten.” he cooed. I was fuming, half-tempted to fling my laptop across the room if it wasn’t so expensive. “Anyway, I hope she comes to her senses. The exams must be getting to her, but on more important—”

I closed my laptop with another huff, throwing it in its case and shoving my books in my bag. Unbelievable. It was hard to get me riled, but my face was burning so hard with embarrassment and anger that my cheeks hurt. No way in hell was I letting this guy get to me. He was probably a complete idiot who didn’t deserve the satisfaction of making me angry, and was probably sweating in his studio for being such a coward and ending an argument that he was destined to lose. Throwing my jacket on, I left the study area as fast as I could. I needed food, a hot shower, and Vernon’s stupid voice to be erased from my memory.

I passed by the lobby, avoiding DJ Suga’s smirk as he lazed against his desk.

“Nice show, doll.” I heard him say to my retreating back. “You’re a natural.”

“So, I heard the radio show last night.” Joshua’s voice was like a meek puppy, molasses slow as he weighed my expressions.

“Can we not?” I sighed tiredly, taking a sharp stab into my bubble tea. My straw pierced through the tight plastic with a satisfying ‘pop’ and I gave a hard sip of my thai.

The small bubble tea shop felt even more suffocating than usual, the arylide yellow walls closing in on me through Joshua’s motherly gaze. There was nowhere to go when you’re trapped under his chocolate eyes. People who have never done a wrong thing in their life would plead guilty if Joshua was chastising them.

“Minghao’s in Sigma. He said that Vernon was practically fuming when he got back.” he informed, both of his hands clutching in his mango yogurt tea. “Apparently he doesn’t get angry often.”

“Well, I’m glad I was able to tap into his newfound emotions.” I replied tartly, looking away to focus on the black framed window. The sky was a dull blue-grey, signaling the end of another day. Clouds blanketed the campus, fat and eager for a reprieve. “Josh, can you please stop looking at me like that? I did nothing wrong. I only spoke my mind, or is that against your moral code?”

“It’s not.” Joshua huffed. “But you messed up your final project by picking a fight with him. You don’t have much time.”

“It’s fine. I’ll ask Suga for help. He found my little stunt entertaining.”

“His show is about underground rap. What on earth do you know about underground rap?”

“Okay, what about Woozi?”

“Not after what happened last night. Vernon and Jihoon are friends, no way is he going to help you.”

“Alright, Grapevine.” I looked up at him through my lashes. “I was impulsive. What do you want me to do, apologize for telling the truth?”

“Stop attacking me. I'm just saying for the sake of your grade, you should try making peace with him.” Joshua took an obnoxious sip of his tea, emptying his plastic cup with a loud slurp. “You already declared radio as your topic, right?”

“Yeah, yeah.” I glowered, shifting in my uncomfortable metal stool. “I’ll figure something out, don’t worry.”

Seemingly satisfied, Joshua threw away his finished drink and put on his backpack. A little part of me envied how put-together my friend always was, the perfect poster student in a baby blue button down and Dockers oxfords. He gave me a pleased smile and waved to the owner, pulling out his portable umbrella. “I gotta go to glee club, but think about what I said alright?” he patted my head, mussing up my hair. Before I could growl in his face he was already out the door, waving cheerfully.

Once he was out of sight, I let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding in. Feeling a whole lot more heavier and weighed with the whole world against me, I slumped in my chair and leaned over my laptop. Ordering another round of tea, I vegetated in that little hole-in-the-wall shop all evening. Mulling over my unfinished radio project, the layers and upon layers of other subjects I had to handle, and to my bitter acknowledgement, The Lockdown. Had I made a mistake, lashing on a fellow student when I really did have no clue what was going on? I only said what I saw, and while I wasn't going to take it back a little part of me felt guilty for putting that guy on the spot.

It was already past ten when I finally decided to go home. Popping my joints in all the right places I packed up my things, bumping into other customers who were trying to get something to drink before the shop closed. Bubbling myself to repel the happy students lazing around the sweet smelling shop, I walked outside where the rain was at its peak.

Thunder popped across the sky, and I flinched, clutching the straps of my bag tighter around my shoulders. I didn’t have an umbrella and my windbreaker definitely wasn’t large enough to protect myself and my laptop. Water droplets bounced like millions of tiny scintillating diamonds across the sidewalk, and I had to take half a step under the canopy to stay dry.

“The rain isn’t going to stop anytime soon, but a little water never hurt anybody.”

That voice. The pops in the sky, the lightning streaking across the midnight blue sky suddenly made a race into my chest, electrifying me and rooting me to the spot. An umbrella was suddenly draped over my head, the inner lining decorated with pearl white clouds and a clear azure sky. I looked up to the speaker of that insultingly attractive voice, and it belonged to DJ Vernon of The Thursday Night Lockdown.

There were a number of things that confused me on a daily basis. The people who order iced water at Starbucks, or why the detergent pods couldn’t be used in the laundry rooms because they were so damn convenient. But today it was Vernon, I couldn’t fathom why I couldn’t look at him and get mad like I did last night. It was like he was a completely different person, the way he smiled like he was the sunshine steering away tonight’s rainfall.

He was cute. Really cute. I felt trapped under his aura, which felt tons warmer than the cold rainy night. Eyes like caramel coffee, both energizing and sweet. A smile so disarming I was struck as much as the lightning to a tree, a little part of me felt like he was being betrayed because I didn’t deserve such niceties.

“Uh, are you okay?” his smile quirked in confusion, and I realized he probably felt really uncomfortable that I was staring up at him like he was some beacon in a fog. He tilted his head, the dark bangs shifting slightly in his neon orange beanie. One hand held the handle of the umbrella, the other with a large strawberry yogurt boba. If I moved a centimeter closer I would surely be bumping into his arm. As fate would play dirty tricks in life, it was inevitable that I would end up meeting him the night after I called him out.

Feeling like cotton was being shoved in my throat, I said quietly, “Hey, Vernon.”

And I couldn’t comprehend the sinking feeling in my stomach when his face fell slightly at my words, recognizing my voice just as quickly as I had. “Oh, Ten.” he said with a sort of glazed wonder, his umbrella dipping slightly to let the water dribble off the edge. “You look, a lot less scarier than I imagined you to be.”

“Scarier?” I gaped, wondering exactly how angry I made this guy.

“Yeah. When you’re not talking, of course.” his voice was devoid of any distinguishable emotion, blending with his barely there smile and off-putting gaze. “You look, kind of sweet actually. But unfortunately for you, looks are deceiving.” he deadpanned simply.

And he dropped me like a bowling ball, pulling away from me and walking into the rain.

My eyes followed his quickly retreating trail, looking about as dry as a sheet of paper as he walked into the street. I swallowed back a sigh, half-expecting Vernon to walk away upon discovering I was Caller 10. He had every right to leave me stranded, but it felt even crappier watching him walk off in the rain. I looked up into the suffocating sky, the dark clouds giving me no hope of getting back to the dorms without being drenched. Maybe if I stared hard enough, the rain would stop. Maybe I could do a raindance, at this point dignity was non-existent.

The tic-tic of rain suddenly turned into harsh splashes, and I looked straight to find Vernon retreating his footsteps and making his way back to me. If he noticed his Timberlands drowning by the neck in grimy water, he made no notice. He looked like he was talking to himself, his cheeks glowing pink in the midst of the grey city as he quickly pushed himself back to the front of the store. My heart rate seemed to multiply in double time the closer he got, and I fought the urge to go back inside the warm shop and avoid him altogether.

“Okay, shit. I’m not that much of a dick.” he looked guilty, biting his bubble gum toned lips. There it was again with the eyes, I thought in frustration as he stared in the remnants of my soul. They reminded me a little of Joshua’s, they way he’d stare and be completely willing to share the world. Vernon placed the umbrella over both of our heads. “I’m not gonna let you walk in the rain alone. Are you heading to the bus stop?”

“Yeah.” I said quietly, still surprised he actually came back for me. What exactly was this guy?

“Cool. C’mon then.”

I followed his footsteps, doing my best to match his long legs which were covered by a light pair of cuffed jeans. I don’t even know what I was thinking, walking with the guy I practically trashed on the night before. He didn’t seem to know what he was doing either, his Adam’s apple bobbing nervously as he walked to the stoplight. It seemed more like his morality was forcing him to be generous to me, and it was only more aching on my conscious knowing he was being nice to someone who probably didn’t deserve it.

“Wow,” I murmured against the thick rain, soft enough for only the two of us to hear. “You’re really nice.”

A small grin tugged on Vernon’s lips as we rounded the corner. He refused to look at me, his gaze dead straight on our destination. “Why, did you think I was some evil radio host?”

“No.” I snorted, “Believe it or not I actually thought you were pretty nice back then, too. Anyone who’d stand to defend their friend no matter how bad they messed up, is a pretty good guy in my books.”

He didn’t reply after that, and I didn’t mind. He probably thought I was tricking him or something. We stood in front of the bus stop next to the other late-stragglers, waiting for the next bus to take us back.

I tried not to notice the wary look he gave me, not because I looked threatening, but because I was pretty far from him. As big as his umbrella was, I kept edging away from the center to give him his personal space. My left shoulder was exposed, water spilling on the wicker fabric of my windbreaker. I did my best to ignore the subtle way Vernon would try to cover it.

“Your show is nice.” I continued to fill the lack of conversation, might as well while we waited it out. “It was my first time listening to it. I thought it was great, I like your music taste and you really sound like you’re enjoying it. I was actually supposed to write about your show for a project. Still am, actually.” I added with a little bit of remorse, willing for the bus to come faster. “It’s too late to change my topic, but I’ll figure my way around.” The familiar red and white bus turned into the stop, and I shied away from Vernon’s space, finally looking at him with as much sincerity as I could muster. “Thanks for waiting.”

And as I climbed on the bus, Vernon finally spoke.

“Turns out the girl broke into tears after. Coups really fucked up.”

My head snapped to him in surprise, Vernon still rooted on the spot. While I didn’t want to be right, knowing I was made the situation feel a lot more real. Our fight wasn't in vain. I didn't understand why Vernon felt the need to tell me that, so I bit my lip and replied, “I'm sorry to hear that happened.”

“You were right about Seungcheol. I talked to him today.” he looked up through his lashes with nothing but pure guilt, “While I’m still angry for you talking trash about my friend, I’m sorry I was quick to judge.”

Before I could even let his words sink in, the glass doors barriered us, and the buss whirred back to life. I gripped on the handle of the railing, watching Vernon wait for his bus as mine drove away. Vernon certainly was a character, I couldn’t even tell if he liked me or hated me. But he said sorry, and it wasn’t even his fault, and that only fueled the aching guilt inside me that would haunt me for the following week.

The next Thursday felt more like a Monday, the most painful Monday-Thursday in my entire college career. There was just so much work. I felt like I was drowning in it. Drowning in sleepless nights, drowning in coffee and all the various types of teas in the hope to keep myself conscious for even five seconds. I couldn’t retain any information my professors were giving me. My projects were crap, my life was a mess, and I could hardly breathe.

So that’s how I ended up in my dormitory’s laundry room at 3 A.M., curled up against the washing machine. My laptop was strewn across my slippers, my headphones connected to them and wound over my ears.

I’m sure it was normal for students to have their obligatory breakdown midway through the semester. When everything feels like it’s crashing down on you and you have no idea how to get up. I pressed my back further into the rumbling washing machine, the cool metal burning through my thin pajamas. I turned my music up up up, all the way to max volume until I couldn’t hear myself tear.

Crying’s a good thing, I tell myself.

It’d be even worse to let myself bottle up and explode in the worst possible way. I wasn’t even entirely sure as to what I was crying about, all I knew was that I was sad and I needed to let it out. Was it the piles of work? The fact that I missed home? My subpar projects? My shoulders shook like a chilled autumn leaf, brittle and vulnerable, my throat constricting and my face puffy and wet with stress.

I wasn’t exactly sure how long I was crying for, but I remember hearing the music breaking to a MultiVitamin commercial, forcing me to change the station on my computer.

“We’re at the last hour of The Lockdown.” Vernon’s voice purred in my ears, willing me to lift my shoulders up a centimeter.  

I exhaled tiredly, wiping away the tears that still wouldn’t cease their race down my face. My fixation to his radio show since that time in the rain definitely wasn't healthy, it was one of the main things distracting me from my studies. Although I would like to convince myself it was because of my Media Studies project, and not a certain beanie-wearing DJ.

“I'm not exactly sure how many of you are up with me, but if you are—that's lit!” I suppressed the small smile at his infectious enthusiasm.  “Because now you get to listen to a little something I whipped up with Sigma last month. It still needs a little bit of work, but you’ll like it either way.”

Vernon wrote music?

“This is for everyone who's going through a hard time right now. That you'll always have someone to lean on.

If I am in your heart If I am really in your heart Wherever you are I will follow you Even if we’re so busy That we can’t see each other often If we get drunk on each other and fall asleep In the dreams, don’t hesitate Lean on me.”

When he started rapping, I realized there was way more to radio than I thought. Way more on the inside to the puzzle that was Vernon. At the time, the one thing that I was absolutely sure of was that I seriously underestimated him. There was so much passion in his words, the messages he wanted to share, his declaration was nothing more than genuine. It only caused my emotional self to get even worse, tears bubbling down my face like water boiling over.

As soon as he finished his song I pulled out my phone, and tugged off the plug of the speaker. Vernon’s bashful self started explaining the origins of his song, the speakers echoing throughout the cramped laundry room. Pressing my cell to my ear, I waited to the all-too familiar dial tone of “Hotline Bling.”

“Oh. We have a caller! I didn’t think anyone would be awake.” he chuckled awkwardly, and I wondered what he thought about his rapping if he only decided to sing when virtually no one would be listening. “Welcome to The Lockdown… Ten?”

Surprise, surprise. “Hey, Vernon.” I sniffed, trying my hardest not to whimper according to  my weary throat.

“Are you, are you crying?” there was disbelief laced in his voice, honest surprise. He spoke as if this wasn't public radio, like a one-on-one phone call between two friends. “Was it that bad?”

“What? No?” I hiccupped, rubbing my raw nose between the paw of my sweater. “You’re amazing. I loved it so much. You’re so talented.” the words rushed out in impatient whispers, as if the laundry room had ears and would eat up my words if I didn’t speak fast enough. “I had no idea you could write songs.”

“Thank you.” he murmured, his words lingering in the air with no intention of ending the conversation.

“And I’m sorry. Sorry for talking shit on-air, sorry for thinking so badly for you, sorry for everything and anything. And if it’s okay and if you think I’m not so much of a scary person as you imagined,” his warm chuckles reverberated through the airwaves, and I stuffed my face in my sweater in embarrassment, “I know you said you’d never want to go out with me, but do you think you could take those words back for one afternoon? So I can apologize in person.”

I could practically hear his smile from the other line. “It’s a date, Ten.”

#vernon #seventeen #seventeen scenarios #svtcreations #svtnetwork #hansol #vernon scenarios #vernon fic #seventeen fic #hansol scenarios #hansol fic #hansol vernon chwe #get lost in the rhythm of me #kpop #kpop scenarios #kpop fic

[hippieeloquent]

Free Vacation Rental Listings

What's on your own travel bucket list? If you're like lots of people, the more you travel, the harder places you supplment your bucket list. So when the editors in the website Big 7 Travel announced this list with the world's top 50 bucket list destinations, we stopped in your tracks and started checking off the boxes. The website surveyed its 1.5 million-strong social audience in order to determine the most effective bucket list places all over the world. According to Sarah Clayton-Lea, head of quite happy with Big 7 Travel, this can be a first-time the site has assembled this list. "Bucket list travel was a trend that sprouted time and again in the past surveys when asking our readers what type of travel content they most enjoyed consuming," says Clayton-Lea. "So, our curiosity got better people and that we desired to know which destinations people are hoping to see for 2019/2020." READ MORE: "Why You Should Skip Iceland And Go To These 9 Under-the-Radar Places" Today In: ForbesWomen Coronavirus Travel: Is This Your Chance To Book The Cheapest Vacation Ever? Lessons From Coronavirus For Future Climate Change Public Health Crises 6 Ways Being Selfish Can Make You Successful The results of the world’s top 50 bucket list destinations include some from the most beautiful places on earth. "White sandy beaches remain a must-visit for most, with vibrant cities also making a physique on the lot of people’s bucket lists," says Clayton-Lea. Countries with naturally beautiful scenery and world-famous landmarks came out on top: 22% with the destinations on their email list have white sandy beaches, while 52% are iconic cities. The famously colorful Bo Kaap neighborhood in Cape Town, South Africa. The famously colorful Bo Kaap neighborhood in Cape Town, South Africa. GETTY PROMOTED Deloitte BRANDVOICE | Paid Program Deloitte’s Global Millennial Survey: Exploring A “Generation Disrupted” Mitsubishi Heavy Industries BRANDVOICE | Paid Program What Does It Mean That America Is A Net Exporter of LNG? Google Cloud BRANDVOICE | Paid Program How To Spot The Biggest Tech Developments In the study, Big 7 Travel found out that individuals were also more prone to add a destination to their list whenever they had seen it on social networking, and 33% of individuals research vacation destinations on his or her Instagram feed. "With over one-third of our own readers saying they appear to Instagram for travel inspiration, it feels right that cities with colorful neighborhoods (like Cape Town’s Bo Kaap) made the cut," says Clayton-Lea. Bali topped this list from the 50 most favored bucket list destination on earth, but there was also some unexpected picks. "The top 10 list has a lot of the expected dream destinations, but there are some surprises on their email list: Paro Valley in Bhutan, as an example, or Virunga National Park within the Congo," says Clayton-Lea. "I think this shows an excellent appetite to get a need to get off the grid which enable it to only believe that social networking (and Netflix, inside the case of Virunga!) is liable for spreading the word of the amazing places." An interesting factoid uncovered in case study: Most people have the average bucket list of just 11 places, with the hope of visiting seven of these locations in their lifetime. No matter how a multitude of locations are in your bucket list, this ranking you can get hoping to see places near and a lot. Read on for your top 50 bucket list destinations within the world and what Big 7 Travel was required to say about each one of these. Overlooking the jungle one of Bali's highly Instagrammed swings. Overlooking the jungle using one of Bali's highly Instagrammed swings. GETTY 1. Bali, Indonesia: "You’ll find beaches, volcanoes, Komodo dragons and jungles sheltering elephants, orangutans and tigers. Basically, it’s paradise. It’s likely you’ve seen a picture of Bali on social media at least inside the past 7 days, as it’s this kind of popular bucket list destination for 2019." 2. New Orleans: "The lively city recognized for its street music, festive vibe as well as a melting pot of French, African and American cultures is worth the trip. NOLA is really a city packed with adventures at every turn and should be on everyone’s must-visit list." 3. Kerry, Ireland:" All the way west in Ireland is one in the country’s most scenic counties. Kerry’s mountains, lakes and coasts are postcard-perfect, and that’s before you decide to add in Killarney National Park. The unique small towns like Dingle enhance its charm." El Badi Palace in the Marrakesh medina. El Badi Palace inside Marrakesh medina. GETTY 4. Marrakesh, Morocco: "This ancient walled city hosts mosques, palaces and lush gardens. It’s known as The Red City with thanks to the color from the brick walls around the city. The medina is a UNESCO World Heritage Centre." 5. Sydney: "Sydney is well known worldwide as one in the greatest and quite a few iconic cities on the planet. Amazing things to do aren’t nearly impossible to find; the location has gorgeous beaches, great cafes and world-class entertainment on offer wherever you look." 6. The Maldives: "This tropical nation within the Indian Ocean consist of more than 1,000 coral islands. It’s the place to find some in the world’s most luxurious hotel resorts, with white sandy beaches, underwater villas and restaurants and bright blue waters." Paris, France. Paris, France. GETTY 7. Paris, France: "One with the most iconic cities within the world, Paris tops many people’s bucket lists. You’ll see so many famous landmarks here: the Eiffel Tower, Arc de Triomphe, Notre Dame cathedral-this list is never-ending." 8. Cape Town, South Africa: "Cape Town is really a dream location to go to: endless pure beauty and clifftop views, pastel pink neighborhoods and turquoise waters." 9. Dubai, U.A.E.: "The high-flying city in the U.A.E, Dubai is one from the most glamorous destinations you’ll ever visit, and is also particularly favored by Big 7 Travel readers." Sunset In Bora Bora, French Polynesia. Sunset In Bora Bora, French Polynesia. GETTY 10. Bora Bora, French Polynesia: "Bora Bora is Tahiti's most well-known island. How do overwater bungalows and underwater adventures sound to you? To us, it’s everything we could want from a bucket list destination." 11. New York: "New York is just one of America’s most fun states. With charming upstate scenery, world-class cuisine and culture and more activities than you may fit into one lifetime. The city’s five boroughs all have special features; it’s extremely hard to narrow it down" 12. Dubrovnik, Croatia: "As George Bernard Shaw once said, 'Those who seek paradise on Earth should come to Dubrovnik.' With its winding streets, cliffside beach bars and UNESCO World Heritage Site of the Old Town, it’s no surprise Dubrovnik is such a popular spot." Carlton hill in Edinburgh, Scotland. Carlton hill in Edinburgh, Scotland. GETTY 13. Edinburgh, Scotland: "With the historic Edinburgh castle looming over the location, culture in spades and wonderfully friendly locals, that is one in the world’s greatest city breaks." 14. Rome, Italy: "Whether it’s your first time in Rome or maybe your 50th, the very best thing about this city is that you’ll always discover new things every time you stroll the scenic streets." 15. Paro Valley, Bhutan: Paro Valley is famous for its monasteries, fortresses (or dzongs) and dramatic landscapes. Tucked between China and India, Bhutan is often a mysterious country that prides itself on sustainable tourism. You’ll find Paro Taktsang here, a Himalayan Buddhist sacred site." At the Jal Mahal Palace at sunset in Jaipur, India. At the Jal Mahal Palace at sunset in Jaipur, India. GETTY 16. Jaipur, India: "Jaipur is famous as the ‘Pink City’ for the pale terracotta buildings. This was originally carried out to impress the visiting Prince Albert during his 1876 tour of India by order in the Maharaja (Sawai Ram Singh). Even today, it’s illegal to color buildings any other color." 17. Waikato, New Zealand: "Waikato, an area in New Zealand’s North Island, has massive underground caves, lush rainforest as well as the buzzy capital of scotland - Hamilton. But the area’s main attraction? A Middle-earth adventure for the film list of Lord in the Rings. Hobbiton Movie Set retains the first Hobbit holes in the making of the films." 18. Havana, Cuba: "Cuba’s capital is actually 500 years old along with a riot of color. Brightly painted buildings and vintage cars make Havana a photogenic dream." A take a look at Tokyo Skytree and the town skyline through the Tobu Levant Hotel. A view of Tokyo Skytree and town skyline from the Tobu Levant Hotel. PHOTO COURTESY OF JONATHAN BLOOM 19. Tokyo, Japan: "Visiting Tokyo is similar to going to the future-flashing neon lights, incredible technology-yet there’s still a refreshing sense of culture and history." 20. Antarctica: "Earth’s southernmost continent, Antarctica is a once-in-a-lifetime destination. Nowhere else can equate to the ultimate remoteness of the snowy place. It’s not an easy day at make, but you’ll be rewarded with breathtaking views in the white wilderness, icy sea kayaking and whale sightings." 21. Vancouver, Canada: "Vancouver is in the middle of water yet towards the mountains and possesses world-class art, restaurants and loads of other attractions to hold you entertained." 22. Los Angeles: "In an urban area with year-round sunshine, glam bars, beaches and hikes, you will find endless incredible experiences to take pleasure from in Los Angeles. It’s no surprise there are almost 5O million ‘LA’ hashtags on Insta." In Kruger National Park, South Africa. In Kruger National Park, South Africa. GETTY 23. Kruger National Park, South Africa: "The Kruger National Park is often a vast space in northeastern South Africa that is home to an enormous array of wildlife. The park has safari experiences of all, allowing you the opportunity escape busy city living and obtain back to nature." 24. Santorini, Greece: "Santorini is really a number of islands; Thíra, Thirassiá, Asproníssi, Palea and Nea Kaméni. Beaches with volcanic black or red sand and clear blue waters get this a perfect holiday spot. With its famous Santorini sunsets, it’s not surprising that it’s one with the most favored bucket list destinations." 25. Moscow, Russia: "Russia’s cosmopolitan capital, Moscow can be a beautiful destination to see in almost any season. Colorful domes and bell chimes ring out from over 600 churches within the city, and also the a sense history is immense. Culture lovers will likely be impressed while using museums and ballet." 26. Singapore: "Singapore can be a small island city-state off southern Malaysia which punches way above its weight on the global level. It’s today's city with colorful buildings, futuristic bridges and a cloud forest." London's Westminster Bridge. London's Westminster Bridge. GETTY 27. London, England: "Pretty pink restaurants, futuristic space-age toilets and jungle skyline views are just some of our favorite things about London. And of course, each of the classics: Big Ben, red phone boxes and world-class museums and galleries." 28. Rio de Janeiro, Brazil: "Rio de Janeiro is definitely one of the most iconic cities inside the world with instantly recognizable landscapes and landmarks." 29. Petra, Jordan: "The ancient Nabatean city of Petra in southern Jordan is flanked by beautiful red rocks and steep gorges. The world wonder is undoubtedly Jordan’s most beneficial treasure and greatest tourist attraction." 30. Hong Kong: "Famous for its skylines and vibrant food scene, what most people don’t know is the fact that 70% of Hong Kong is mountains and lush parks. Colorful playgrounds and sci-fi apartment blocks give HK an enviable edge." Beach and sea waves shot from above in Barbados. Beach and sea waves shot from above in Barbados. GETTY 31. Barbabos: "Barbados is one of these magical holiday destinations that everyone desires visiting. Who wouldn’t put this on their bucket list? Nestled inside south of the Caribbean, it offers stunning beauty and wonderful local culture and is also the perfect place to unwind." 32. Amsterdam: "Forget about cliched images of smoke shops and gaudy red lights. From floating flower markets to bohemian neighborhoods, this city has all of it." 33. Santiago, Chile: "Santiago can be a cosmopolitan city with the best of Chilean culture; art galleries, design shops and handicraft markets, as well as lively Latino nightlife. You’ll stroll through historic neighborhoods with pretty winding streets and charming bars and cafes." 34. Cairo, Egypt: "Cairo is one in the most ancient cities within the world. Sitting for the Nile river with wonderful museums, vibrant culture and friendly locals, it makes for an excellent holiday." Biking in Copenhagen. Biking in Copenhagen. GETTY 35. Copenhagen, Denmark: "Copenhagen’s rustic fishing ports, modern graffiti and winding red brick streets are just some of computerized devices this kind of beautiful bucket list destination. It oozes Scandi cool from every corner, with top-notch food, stylish design plus an always hip atmosphere." 36. Seoul, Korea: "Seoul is a vibrant metropolis where old-meets-new, with pop culture (K-Pop!) alongside Buddhist temples. 37. Laucala Island Resort, Fiji: "Laucala Island Resort can be a private island in Fiji, in absolute paradise. It is one kind of three small islands from the northeast coast of Taveuni in Fiji. There are coconut trees, a sustainable farm and miles of beach, along with coral reefs, postcard-perfect beaches and lush rainforest." 38. Providencia, Colombia: "The Colombian island of Providencia is the perfect mixture of South America along with the Caribbean. It’s best noted for Crab Cay: an unspoiled little island where all there is certainly to accomplish is snorkel and lie on the beach." Photographing Machu Picchu, Peru. Photographing Machu Picchu, Peru. GETTY 39. Machu Picchu, Peru: "The best way to have here? Arrive at Machu Picchu in fashion on the 360° Train which will bring you over the Peruvian countryside on the lost city. The wide, panoramic windows are fantastic for taking in the scene, and so they serve Pisco Sours on board." 40. Virunga National Park, Democratic Republic of Congo: "Virunga National Park is one of the most biologically diverse areas on this planet and home to the world’s critically endangered mountain gorillas. It’s filled with lush rainforest and has received even more attention considering that the documentary Virunga." 41. Lisbon, Portugal: "Lisbon, the hilly capital of Portugal, is postcard-perfect featuring its cobbled streets, pristine waters and local Atlantic beaches." 42. Hanoi, Vietnam: "Hanoi-the capital of Vietnam-is recognized for its rich history, busy street life and centuries of French, Asian and Chinese influences all blended into one bustling city. It’s a great base by which to explore the North of Vietnam, including Halong Bay and Sapa, while also experiencing the comforts of a contemporary vibrant city." A take a look at Honolulu's Magic Island And Waikiki Beach. A view of Honolulu's Magic Island And Waikiki Beach. GETTY 43. Hawaii: "From the busyness of Oahu on the romance of Maui and off-the-beaten-path adventures on Lanai and Molokai. The Hawaiian Islands are pure paradise. Explore colorful canyons and waterfalls and eat one's body weight in fresh poke." 44. Ibiza, Spain: "While you’ll have your share of techno club experiences, Ibiza is also one with the most beautiful Spanish islands, which has a pretty Old Town and scenic beaches. Spend the afternoon on the beach along with the nights in legendary clubs." 45. Beijing, China: "Beijing is China’s political, economic, and cultural center, with six Unesco World Heritage Sites in this city alone. Discover Forbidden City, street food dishes of Peking duck as well as, the Great Wall of China." 46. Budapest, Hungary: "The capital capital of scotland- Hungary, Budapest is often a fairytale city in Eastern Europe. The city itself is separated from the 19th-century Chain Bridge that connects the hilly Buda district with flat Pest-hence the name Budapest." Photographing Vernazza in Cinque Terre. Photographing Vernazza in Cinque Terre. GETTY 47. Cinque Terre, Italy: "Is there anything prettier than the therapy lamp of centuries-old seaside villages about the rugged Italian Riviera coastline? The five towns (Manarola, Riomaggiore, Corniglia, Vernazza and Monterosso al Mare) are made for bucket lists." 48. Buenos Aires, Argentina: "Bookstores occur palatial theatres, tango dancing within the streets and brightly painted neighborhoods. These are just some of the thing that makes Buenos Aires so beautiful." 49. Las Vegas: "With the bright lights, party atmosphere and endless what to see and do, it’s it's no surprise that that Las Vegas has become a glittering global tourism destination. Take a chance inside the casinos prior to the early hours or see world-class entertainment." 50: Matterhorn, Switzerland: "The Matterhorn is one with the world’s most iconic peaks-the pyramid-shaped mountain, that's very difficult to climb, is considered to get the most-photographed mountain inside world." For details on Free Vacation Rental Listings take a look at https://vacationrentalsbyowner.page.tl/Free-Vacation-Rental-Listings.htm http://vacationrentalwonderland.jigsy.com/ http://vacationrentalslist.website2.me/ http://im-creator.com/free/vacationrentalsbyowner/vacationrentalsbyowner https://5e6b6fcf17666.site123.me/blog/vacation-rentals-by-owner

#Free Vacation Rental Listings