#i shouldn't have to be a responsible adult i should leap into the arms of my beloved | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

vergilsama922 · 2 months

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Kyoko: Knocks and enters You wanted to see me, Vice-Headmistress Ikishima?

Midari: Ahh, Kyoko! Perfect timing! Grins widely, showing off her latest injury Look at this! Isn't it just exhilarating? The rush of adrenaline is unlike anything else! That Mikan girl sure is something special. Fixed me up in a heartbeat.

Kyoko: Eyes the bandage on her leg, unimpressed I'm more interested in discussing the safety concerns your… hobbies are raising. Headmaster Kirigiri is worried, and frankly, so am I.

Midari: Oh, come on, Kyoko! Where's the fun in playing it safe all the time? You should try it; let loose a little! I bet even the Ultimate Detective needs a break from being so uptight.

Kyoko: My "uptightness," as you call it, is not the issue here. It's your disregard for safety and the example it sets for our students. As vice-headmistress, you have a responsibility to them.

Midari: Laughs Responsibility, schmonsibility! I live for the thrill! And besides, I'm teaching them a valuable lesson: to seize life by the horns!

Kyoko: There's a difference between seizing life and recklessly endangering it. Sighs I'm here to propose a compromise. Continue your… activities, but under safer conditions. And perhaps not so publicly.

Midari: Laughs heartily, dismissing Kyoko's concerns A compromise? You sound just like those boring old suits. How about this, Kyoko? Let's settle it with a high-stakes, high-risk gamble. And yes, injury is definitely on the table. Grins wildly as she already has several ideas

Kyoko: Annoyed, crossing her arms That's exactly the problem, Ikishima. Your proposal is reckless and irresponsible. I decline. We're here to ensure the safety and well-being of our students, not to engage in dangerous gambles.

Midari: Rolls her eye Oh, you're such a killjoy like your old man, Kyoko! With that attitude, you're going to end up a lonely woman for the rest of your life.

Kyoko: Raises an eyebrow, clearly unamused That's rich, coming from you, Ikishima. For someone who prides themselves on being fearless, you seem to have a talent for scaring off any potential suitors with your… antics.

Midari: Pauses, then shrugs, still smiling Maybe so, but at least I'm living life on the edge, feeling alive! Can't say the same for those too afraid to take a leap.

Kyoko: Huffs, her patience thinning I'm not here to debate the merits of your lifestyle, Ikishima. What I am here for is to remind you to take your duties and responsibilities as vice-headmistress seriously. Our students' safety and well-being should be your priority.

Midari: Waves her off dismissively Ah, save it, Kyoko. A brat like you shouldn't be lecturing adults on responsibility and duty. Smirks, clearly unfazed

Kyoko: Questioning who the adult here really is. Glances pointedly at Midari Your behavior hardly sets an example of maturity, Ikishima.

Midari: Gives Kyoko a bored look, picking her ear with her finger Yeah, yeah, whatever you say, Detective. I've got better things to do than listen to a lecture from Hope's Peak's little miss perfect.

Kyoko: Groans, rubbing her temples Sometimes I wonder how you even got this job.

Midari: Laughs, seemingly proud Because I'm clearly qualified! Duh! Thanks to my… let's call them 'unique' disciplinary methods, a lot of disputes on campus and in the reserve course have significantly decreased.

Kyoko: Trying to get parties to settle their issues through dangerous gambles or adrenaline-fueled challenges isn't discipline—it's creating an atmosphere of fear. That's not resolution; it's intimidation.

Midari: Shrugs Who cares about the method as long as it works? The results speak for themselves, Kyoko. If a little fear keeps them in line and out of trouble, I see it as an absolute win.

Kyoko: And one more thing, Ikishima. Please refrain from addressing me by my first name. I find it… irritating, especially coming from you.

Midari: Sure thing, Kyoko. Whatever makes you happy.

Kyoko: Looks annoyed for a moment, then quickly composes herself I see talking to you is as productive as always. Turns to leave the room

As Kyoko exits, Midari pulls out a sharpened nail filer, flipping it between her fingers with a practiced ease that suggests she's fully aware of the danger it poses to her. She's not just playing with it; she's flirting with the risk of injury.

Midari: Still playing with the nail filer Ah, Jin, sending his little detective brat to lecture me… Shakes her head, chuckling They just don't get it, do they? Nobody understands the thrill of living on the edge. To them, safety and predictability are everything. But what's the point of living if you're not really alive? If you're not pushing the limits, taking risks… you're just existing, not living.

……..

……………

What did Mia really see in her?

Midari: Standing up, stretching Time to do my daily rounds. Ensure everything's fine and dandy. Groans Gods, how utterly boring as shit this is.

As she opens the door to leave, Midari's eye quickly catches sight of Kyoko talking to Makoto Naegi. Her expression is one of curiosity, her stare long and thoughtful, yet revealing nothing of her internal musings.

Midari: Muttering to herself, still observing So that's the infamous Makoto Naegi, huh? Jin's not too fond of him for reasons I've honestly never paid much attention to. But Kyoko… she seems to like this kid. And those rumors—dating several chicks at once, consensually? Now, that's a feat.

Her gaze shifts back and forth between Kyoko and Makoto, studying the interaction with a keen interest. Kyoko's usual reserved demeanor seems slightly more relaxed around Makoto, her smiles more genuine. Makoto, on the other hand, looks utterly ordinary to Midari. No striking features, no apparent edge—just a plain, ordinary high school kid.

Midari: Chewing on her lavender-painted nail, pondering What's so special about this kid? Doesn't look like much of a playboy to me. Must be something else…

A sudden idea strikes her, bringing a wide, mischievous grin to her face.

Midari: To herself, excitedly Oh, this is going to be good. If anything can get Kyoko to loosen up and dive into a bit of thrill, it's got to involve this Naegi kid. And I've got just the perfect plan…

#danganronpa #danganronpa au #hope universe #midari ikishima #kyoko kirigiri

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izzy-b-hands · 1 year

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Modern AU Jack ends up babysitting on short notice for Mary and Doug. There's also a failed exorcism and a squirrel or two.

---

"He can't be the only one," Mary says.

But, her phone confirms it. Everyone else is either working, out of town, or otherwise unavailable.

"It's fine," Doug kisses her temple. "I can go see this exhibition some other time."

"You said this artist is terminally ill and not seeking treatment," she scoffs. "When would you see his work, and him! Ever again? Presuming he would tour with his works again if he should live another few years?"

"Well..."

"Ed trusts him, and I trust Ed," Mary continues, and presses the final contact to call, to beg to babysit the kids for the night and into the next day.

"Uncle Jack!" Louis leaps into his arms.

"Hell-excuse me, I mean, heck yeah!"

Mary smiles. "They already know every swear word from Stede and Doug putting together the new play house in the backyard."

"That shit is haunted," Doug warns as he tosses on his coat. "Seriously. Even the kids are nervous around it."

"It's made of plastic, the scariest thing about it is probably whatever fumes it emits if it would burn," Mary says gently. "Just please be outside with them if they play in it. The yard is fenced and there's a camera, but-"

"Haunted," Doug interjects. "Be careful."

Mary shoves him out the door, and then it's the three of them.

"It's only haunted because Dad and Doug accidentally killed a squirrel while building it," Alma says. "Do you wanna know how?"

"I would," Jack lets her take his hand and lead them into the living room, Louis still on his hip. "Ooh, can I guess?"

She nods eagerly.

"They accidentally sat on it."

Instant giggles, but a shake of their heads.

"Accidentally trapped it inside the play house, and it freaked out and died?"

"Nope!" Alma declares. "Give up?"

"I do."

"It fell on Doug, and he screamed, and then Dad smacked it off him with a hammer into the fence!"

He bites his tongue. He shouldn't laugh. It wasn't a nice way for that poor squirrel to go out. But then, it also was a panic response, and he can just see Stede nearly smacking Doug as he sent the squirrel to whatever afterlife squirrels have.

"May the little guy rest in peace," he finally says.

"Can we do a-" Louis pauses. "What's the thing where you tell a ghost to go away again?"

"An exorcism?" Jack asks.

"Yeah!"

"I've got that Ouija board my friends and I made at school!" Alma cries. "I'll go get it. Uncle Jack, you get candles and uh. Whatever else we need!"

"Don't we need a priest for this?" he asks.

"You're kind of like one, right?" Louis asks as he points Jack towards the kitchen and an extra supply of battery operated tea light candles.

"In what way?"

"An adult?"

Jack snorts. "Save that one and tell your dad and Ed that. They'll laugh their asses off."

"Why?"

"Because they're very silly."

"You're telling me," Louis rolls his eyes and sighs, and it takes everything in Jack not to immediately laugh.

"Okay," Alma announces, and he turns to her.

And immediately nearly laughs again.

She is every bit Stede's kid. Covered in a dark black mesh and lace veil, wearing a long black skirt and long-sleeved black top covered in sequins. She's even done her makeup in black and dark red eyeshadow, though that application screams that Ed taught it to her.

"I don't think we'll need a priest, or even the candles," he says instead. "Your sister has it covered by the look of her."

Louis finally lets him put him down as they make their way into the darkening backyard, and he can sort of understand the creepy factor. The bit of yard is fenced off from the rest of the land they own, but it's still a massive yard, with the new playhouse tucked in a far corner.

"Does this have a fucking router?" Jack asks as he squishes himself into the playhouse and peers around.

"How else would we watch movies in here?" Alma asks.

"I...a DVD player and an extension cord?"

"What? No," she scoffs. "Uncle Jack, we've come a long way since then."

He thinks of the VHS player he's been doing his best to keep up since he inherited it from his mom, and decides not to even get into that.

"Okay, everyone put your hands on the planchette," she continues, setting a construction paper and glitter covered homemade Ouija board on the fake woodgrain plastic table between them. "Uh. If you can reach."

His knees are pressed solidly against the table, but he reaches around them as best he can to get a hand on the paper planchette.

"I know squirrels don't know English, but why are you still here?" she demands of the air in the playhouse.

Nothing happens.

"Ghosts aren't real," Louis says with a smile, but his lower lip quivers.

"Louis!" Alma groans. "Don't ruin it! You already hate coming in here, and it isn't any fun being in here alone all the time-"

There's a loud thunk onto the roof of the house, and she cuts herself off with a hushed gasp.

"It's probably just a-"

"Shut up!" Alma hisses at Jack. "It's the ghost!"

There's a chittering sound. Scratching. Clawing.

"I don't wanna die by squirrel," Louis whimpers, and reaches for his hand.

"You two know Uncle Jack has seen some shit, right?"

They nod.

"Let me go out and face it. You trust me?"

They nod again.

He less crawls and more falls out of the playhouse, and almost directly onto a very alive, very fat squirrel.

"So it's you," he scowls at it. "Scaring these poor kids!"

It studies him, and almost looks cute.

Then it leaps for his face.

"Shhh," Jack smiles as he opens the door for Doug and Mary. "They're sleeping in. Had a late night of movie watching, probably a little too much sugar."

"I think they'll survive," Doug says. "What's up with your face?"

"Just my face!"

"You have..." Mary joins Doug in examining his face. "Are those bite marks?"

"We made a lil visit to the ER too," Jack chuckles. "The playhouse is no longer haunted, and that's what matters!"

He shuffles out past them before they can ask any more questions, like how much did it cost to pay upfront for the various shots required to make sure he didn't die of rabies or squirrel rot or whatever else there might be.

His face is damaged, but his pride isn't. He fought that goddamn squirrel and won, AND managed to keep the kids happy in the end, even if it did require some bribing with treats after the ER.

For a guy without kids, that usually isn't considered responsible enough to look after them? He calls it a motherfucking win.

#text post #long post #this is v silly but it made me laugh

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